Leave A Message with Ally & G - Ally Got CURSED?! And Her Therapist… Wasn’t Actually A Therapist??

Episode Date: August 26, 2026

Would YOU take your parents to a beach club? G did… And within about five minutes, she was ready to disown them. Meanwhile, on the other side of the planet, Ally was dealing with cancelled flight after cancelled flight, to the point where she now wants to book ANOTHER holiday just to recover from this one.PLUS, one Gally's "therapist" has been dishing out her ex's texts, oh and turns out she's not even a real therapist!!! Meanwhile, another Gally's bridesmaid has pulled out of her hen do, and she wants to know: is this a friendship-ending offence, or is she being dramatic.FANCY SENDING A VOICENOTE/MESSAGE GALLY? Send your voice note to: https://wa.me/message/UH4DASEKPFQBA1 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (Oh, and don’t leave out ANY of the juicy details!)OR, you can write us email an on [e-mail] us at @leaveamessagepodcast on socials!Listen every Wednesday wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Leave a message with me, Ali. And me, G. This is a podcast where we help the galleys in need. Whether you've just discovered what Ube is. Or your boyfriend brought up a threesome, like he was asking to split the bill. I like that. That's a good line, script line. Good.

This is a podcast for you. Hello. How are you doing? Happy Wednesday. Happy Wednesday. And you honestly might be, you know, wondering how we're doing this. because we're hustlers. Amen.

It's because we don't sleep. That's why. You may hear by my voice. I actually had quite a big weekend but then I thought yesterday Hair of the dog. I think Hair of the dog is categorical bullshit. I think that is marketing

by alcoholics. Well, I think my dog was too hairy. I think if you go in for... I think Hair of the dog was meant to be like a bloody Mary. Exactly. Cherry Margarita. Three of them

and then two glasses of white wine. Did you have the wine? That's where you went wrong. I had the wine. The wine was where you went wrong. I was a bit excited. Sat next to the only single man at dinner. I thought, come on then.

Come on. Let's get loose. Right, so we've been on our jolz. We've had a lovely time away. Alas, here we are. To be honest, probably don't stop here. No.

We got a lot of things coming up in September. We've got holidays to pack for. Guys, I literally, so I have no storage in my flat. You don't have any storage in your flat. My flag does make me want to just like stick like pins in my eyeballs. Fine. Because I got home yesterday,

thinking, you know when you go... Have you unbacked? Not cool. With what? When? I slept up one yesterday. You know when you come back as well from like a hotel where like I like my shit to be organised?

My flat is a disservice to me. That's true. I am actually quite like Taipei in that I like my things categorized and organise. But if you go to Al's house, okay, your bedroom is got... No, your bedroom is... Not because I haven't got the space for it. Yeah. So when you go from somewhere where like on holiday where you got space and you can do that and then

you come home and you think, oh my God, this is most oversimulating thing of all time. That's bad. It's bad. Well, we have no storage. I have no storage. And my suitcase is like, what are those things called Russian dolls? My suitcase is like Russian dolled within other suitcases,

got like four suitcases in one, all up in my wardrobe. And I literally looked last night and I thought, I'm going to have to take that suitcase down again. I've honestly just stored it away. No, I'm not going to put one away. For my mental health. I'm not going to put one way. I had to.

You're going to leave it out to the first week of September. Second week of September. Yeah, babe. is here. Yeah, babe. See, that fills me with dread. Because I think for me, some of the issues that I have with packing

is the actual opening of the series. I know, well, I was looking at it and I was like, I am going to pack on Friday. I haven't even got a dress yet. I'm going to a wedding, guys. This is what happened. This has happened to me every wedding. You know about it years in advance.

Years in advance. And then the two days before you think, what the fuck will I wear? I would absolutely nothing to wear. Also, guys, shout out by rotation. I love by rotation so much, and I saved so many good dresses. but then I was being so avoidant for no reason whatsoever.

You would plan that shit at three weeks, four weeks and above. They're all rented out. Why is everyone getting married this weekend? Because it's bank holiday weekend. Obviously. It's selfish to get married on a bank holiday. I agree to an extent because if you have a lit wedding and all your friends are, it's the fucking, it's the tits.

Also, it's actually amazing. I do take that back because also, like, for normal people, they don't have to take holiday on a Monday and that is amazing. True. So like, fair play. But anyway, so now I've basically ordered 55. five dresses, one of which is honestly I've had to re-mortage, you know, a house for

which I'm hoping that I'm going to if I love it, I'm going to rent out on by rotation and make my money back. But what about the Top Shot one? You've just sat that off. It's coming. I've not tried it. I ordered the Amy Lynn. The Amy Lynn is a size too big. I'm thinking, can I get it altered? I'm talking to this guy on hinge that is a seamstress.

So I'm like, maybe seamster Seammer. What's the male version of seamstress? I would call that a tailor. A tailor. Taylor, Taylor Swift. Yeah. So I'm talking to this guy

that's a Taylor Swift. So maybe I could go on a date with him, have a little fitting in. This is why she should not be left to her own devices on Hinge. No, my hitting life at the moment is a mess because you,

you have been selfish and you've been away. And that is selfish. I do know that. You've been on holiday and you have not been doing your job. I told you to let me download that fucking up on my phone.

I could have been sat by the pool with my boyfriend next to me doing your HIN. Can you do that boyfriend? What? Fiance. Don't call him that. It's a discerning him and the rock on your finger.

I don't like it when you do that. It's disrespectful to the love of your life and mine. Either way, your fiancé. My fiancé could have been sat next to me when I was doing your hinge. Okay, well, let's figure that out. Well, the other day as well, Izzy, I need to tell you this. I went to this, fuck. Guys, I had an absolute nightmare.

And to be honest, can I tell you? you, we went through such a deeply traumatic travel experience, the two of us last year, that nothing will ever genuinely, I'm not, I'm not phase. I serious, this is why I always say, people who don't suffer in life, they have no resilient. They have no chest. They have no heart. They don't know how to rise. They don't know how to get up and go.

They don't know how to, you know, keep going when the going gets tough. They fail in the face of adversity. Of course they do. Of course they do. Of course they do. They freeze. We had this one night. I won't, you know, go into two meditas, but we had this one night on our way.

to Surfers Paradise in Australia, where we slept on the hotel, on a sofa in an Ibis hotel restaurant from probably one to four in the morning with a cockroach, like, just like moving around us. And the, right, we booked this hotel because our flight got cancelled. We were at the gate.

Our flight got cancelled. We thought, no problem. Tears in my eyes just thinking about it, really did my eyes. Honestly, no problem. We'll just book a hotel, you know, down the road and we'll go get a couple of hours sleep. Baring and I, we'd probably been travelling for 24 hours at this point. Like, my eye was switching. It was not good.

So we go to this, Ibis, we think, brilliant, we'll have a shower, we'll have a couple hours sleep. The fact that you picked up all our cases, do you remember that? Yes. I got in the queue to re-book a flight and Al got every single case we had, which was a lot. Because we were also, you know, mugged by whatever airline we were flying. We were. We were bent over and actually fucked up the ass. We were. It was like 30 quid a kilogram or something stupid.

We basically paid for an extra flight via the weight in our suitcases. We won't defame them. But if you want to know, just honestly go back and see who we'd act. Anyway, we get to this ibis and we're thinking, great, we're going to have a shower, we're going to have a sleep. We booked the room, by the way. We didn't just turn. We weren't like Mary and Joseph. Do you have a room on the floor?

We paid for the room. Yeah. We get to the hotel front desk. It was probably one in the morning and they were. I'm ever so sorry we've got a booking system. We don't have any more rooms. And we were like, right. So, right, are you sure?

And they were like, yeah, we literally. And we were like, this is the booking. They were like, they showed us their screen. They all like, got no more rooms. No, no room in the inn. Literally get in the stable. That is what it was. Sleep with the donkey.

So that's exactly what we did. They said you can sleep in our restaurant on our restaurant sofa, but we can't turn the music off. When I say, guys, this music was so like all night, all night, three hours. hours. I can see clearly now. Lorraine has gone. Anyway. And I thought the rain has not gone. The rain. Oh, the rain is boring. But can I say something that you're not going to like? I feel like you might be jinxed. I think I've done it now. I've had three this year. Mexico. I think you've

had four. I've heard Mexico. No, you had that flight cancelled before that wedding. Como. And now this. Australia, that's four. I think it started then. I think you are the common denominator and no one should travel with you. You should fly alone. Australia was last year. Maybe that was a glitch in the Matrix. Fine. Okay. If I have a problem this weekend then it's me. Yeah, okay. If it's, if it's not, if I have an issue on Thursday,

it's definitely me. If it's anything more than an hour delay, it's you. It's me. Because it's been quite severe. I need to pay an Etsy witch then, because I don't want this hex on me. It's a bad hex. I don't know what they're doing. I actually feel like you probably are the kind of like focal point of a lot of hexing. Oh, I'm sure.

I can kind of see that for you. sure. I reckon there's a lot of girls out there hexing you. Anyway, the point is, go through some hardship because when you actually then, you know, suffer something again. No biggie. Won't touch the sides. I got to my gate on, what day was that, Thursday? As if. Thursday. That's crazy. Also, bear in mind we'd already been told because we had to stop in Bahamas. So we got told that we were going to have to wait in Bahamas a day. My mom had booked a hotel and transport and everything. We got to the gate. Tide Bay Queen. Yeah. And canceled. So then we thought great. Well, that's...

fine, we'll just go back to the villa, you know, no probes. Thank God. Imagine they had like a party of ten in. Thank God. You'd have been like, guys, can we stay with you? Thank God. Anyway, then my mum and James got re-booked on a flight. The next BA flight was on Sunday.

We couldn't get on that. So then the only options were fly home next Thursday, which obviously not an option. Or fly through America. But to fly through America, you have to get an American visa. And everyone says, if you can avoid it, don't do it. Because it's fucking... That's such a stupid system. I'm...

Passing through. Do you know for a layover, so you get off the plane, you have to take your bag, they have to recheck your bag, and then you have to go through customs and passport security just to get through the next flight. I would have actually passed away. I'd have simply just killed over and died. I hate, I hate difficult things for the sake of it.

That is my pet peeve. Yeah. Like, you know when someone makes something difficult for the sake of it? Like, even airlines in general, why are you making me snake like this? It's like when there's no one there, you're making it difficult for me. Open the fucking barrier!

Oh my God! Hate it. Oh my God. Hate it. Yes. Hit it. I hate it. And also the thing in America is that I spent, I spent probably four hours in Charlotte, North Carolina.

I don't know, I'll be rushing back there. They're scary because they walk around with like guns and stuff. So like there was one woman that like tried to not do the snake and he was like, get back in the line. And she obviously ran. And I'm like, obviously you do because they've got guns and you're like so terrified. I'll tell you what, I am fighting my way through John Steinbeck at the moment. What's that?

That book, East of Eden, that's being turned into a Netflix adaptation. Why are you reading that? I'm clawing my way through. My God. But that's a lot of, you know. But why are you reading that for fun? Well, no, because it's coming out as a Netflix. Why I was thinking, let's, also, sometimes I like to read the classics.

Is it a film? It's going to be a film. I've got no brain cells left. Yeah. Hey. Hey. Did you read any books on holiday? Yeah, loads of books.

Any good books you want to share with the group? How was your holiday? You didn't even speak. About it. How was yours? You didn't even speak? I told you, I had a horrible flight. And then other than that, I had the best, like,

I had the most relaxing two weeks ever. And I can't recommend it enough. And if you think you can put yourself through the torture that is traveling there, go to Turks and K Kos. Fair. And do you know what's so fascinating about Turks and Kocos? I only know about Turks and Kikos, obviously, because of Kylie Jenner. Obviously.

I did not know about Texan Koss. Right. When you said we're going to Texan Kikos, I was like, oh, where is that? Exactly. That's why it's a good place to go, because there aren't that many Brits there. No one knows. No one knows.

We didn't have very many Brits in Mallorca, which I thought was weird. I thought that's where all the Brits went. What? Really? Yeah. I think it's where we were staying. We were a bit like in the sticks. Yeah, okay. Because I think there are loads of Brits in New York. Yeah, and like, Parma de Mallorca.

Everyone loves to go to Palmer. But the guy, we went to this restaurant one night, and he was like, this is what Cancun was like before everyone found out about it. So he was like, thank God you came now, because in 50, years it will be an app like it will be so busy it will be like some bars yeah because it's just like you got like I've always said this I don't love the like really like like like santa pay and St bar like all those places that are like trendy and glam are not for me I've never been to any of those places I don't like I don't like long haul flights should be honest I can less absolutely

necessary I love long haul flights I love long haul flights that's a bizarre thing to love that's a pick me thing to love it's not because I spent all my childhood flying before back and forth from Singapore. Like literally. Yeah, but that doesn't make you love it. No, but as in like, it doesn't really like affect me. Like,

I don't really think about it. Yeah. I get on there thinking, God, I've got all this time to watch all these films. You see, I just think it's so dull up there in the sky. It is dull.

It's dull. It's nothing to do. Watch films. It's because Al sleeps. That's why she loves it. Yeah, true. Because you just fall asleep. I watched the Michael Jackson movie.

You know Jafar, you know, the one that came out like earlier this year. Oh, yeah. Was it good. Well, to be honest, the good. the guy the guy that plays it

is actually his his actual nephew Jafar Jackson his Jermaine Jackson's son plays Michael he is like spooky he is Michael Jackson

it's weird I mean the actual plot line is a piece of shite Well is it not his life No it's not It's about like Oh because there are all these court orders

about how much they basically can't talk about like all the allegations There was no reference It's about his early life basically but Jafar, it's weird.

He is Michael Jackson. Like when they were doing the thrill of music video, I thought this is, you are Michael, it's weird. Wow, that must be weird for the family to watch. Like even his voice is, yeah. So I also went away, but I only went for five nights, as I have learned is my max with my parents. And I think we would all agree that that's a really nice time for us all to come home friends.

And we just had a really, yeah, we had a really nice time. I went to Miorca. we um guys this is actually crazy so we went to this beach club like because basically my dad if you don't know is um 105 yeah he's in his 80s so i was like sleigh let's go to puro beach like he'll love that like yeah because technically when you actually think of a beach club like a way ninneica's 105 too he's always no but way linica is a party boy i don't see martin reed fucking popping his hip out every weekend my dad is the party starter. But my dad is like,

he's a party hard. Anyway, it's not Ocean Beach. I'm not asking my dad to get on a fucking podium. It's just like beach beds and food. I was like, Slay,

nicer than being on the beach. Anyway, so we go to this like really nice like beach club, blah, la, so it's set up. My dad's like just sleeping.

Anyway, God bless. He sits up and he goes, God, I don't feel well. And then he project our moments. And we're in this beach club with like,

we have this group of like Irish girls next to us that were like, having the time of their life. Like, I don't know, it was like a 30s or something. We had this boogey couple doing sheisha next to us. And my poor dad was just being sick into a towel because he had like food poisoning or he's drunk or something, God bless. Was so bad.

Anyway, but then we just like stayed the whole day. He just slept and me and my mum got so drunk because we had a minimum spend. So we had to spend all of this money on like food and drink. Me and my mum must have looked like such cows because we just left my dad on the sun loungeer like recovering from his like bout of food poisoning. And we just like, oh, listen, you know, every man for themselves.

Do you know what I mean? When there's a minimum spend, then at the end of the thing, we still hadn't hit the minimum spend. The guy on the, like, front desk was like, come to the shop. So I had to go to the shop and like buy loads of like... Shut up. Yeah. What did you buy? Anything good?

I bought a t-shirt. I bought, I can't. That is funny. Yeah. And I was like, that's actually... Like much. So, it was much. I got to buy merch.

And I was like, they never do that. That was so nice. That's good. Yes. Really, really nice. Yeah, we had the best time and then I came home and obviously Al was still away

so then I kind of had a holiday in London You left a day before me So your holiday was always done by the time I fucking got there I know But then it was nice because there was a heat wave So I fully like wasn't working And was just like lying in Battersea Park

Like every day I like literally I would hate to be my bank account I spent so much I just couldn't stop shopping I've had that this summer I just shop shop shop I don't know what is wrong with me

until I dropped I want to buy everything. Yeah, so bad. There's a South Street sale. Oh, I can't go there. And I will go there. It's really dangerous for me. I will go there because I've got, we've got holidays to go on.

It's really bad. Do you know what I mean? We could die next week. Yeah. All that money is just going to sit there. I basically guys just got a credit card and it's really bad vibes for me. I literally am spending like it's a well of fortune. Yeah.

And it's my money. I keep forgetting. It is your money, but the good thing about a credit card is that because when you spend, like you're always on your net. month. It's delayed. So like when you pay off your statement, you're not actually paying off fully what you spent this month because it's like some hung over from less. Anyway, it's a nicer way of spending. Yeah, but it's easier to spend, I would say. Because like you're also, you look at your bank balance. It's like the same. Yeah, I know. But you've literally got all these clothes in your

wardrobe. I know. Consumerism. It's perfect. Sorry, I just want to pick up on what we started talking about when the camera started rolling that we had to cut short to, you know, intro this episode. But basically, My mom was being so funny. She was asking me all these questions about me and G. It's really a long story. Anyway. That makes it sound really bad. No, no, no.

It's a really long story. No, she was asking me like, because I think people don't, I think we have a very unique relationship and I think that we work in quite a unique way and it's not for everyone. You know, we're very codependent. We share everything. Not everyone's cup of tea, I suppose. Right. Anyway, she was asking me about that and about our relationship and la la la.

and then she said, do you think that you and G have such a good relationship because she always agrees with you? And I said, I don't fucking understand where everyone's got this idea. Last year when we went on holiday, right? We went around the table

and we had to use one word to describe everyone around the table. My sister's one word for G was agreeable. And I literally looked at her and I thought you and I know two different people. How have you just said agreeable?

No, the only thing I will say, I agree, I'm not agreeable and I think we like mostly No, not mostly. 50% of the time would have different opinions on things. Yeah, and I think that... But 50% of the time I think we have the same. But I do think if you were like,

I want noodles and I was like, I want a burger, we'd have noodles. And that is true. On the things that you care about a lot, I would like give in to you and vice versa. Yeah. I think we care to ride for the things. Yes.

Differently. Yes. So then usually one of us wins. Yeah. I think it's very rare that we have opposite opinions on things that we're both deeply concerned about. Yeah, true. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I just thought... I am pretty agreeable. I think most people would say that about it. I personally don't think that. But it's only because you work with me. I can't be agreeable at work. Of course.

Because I got things to say. Nor should you be. But in life, I'm pretty agreeable. I reckon you could carry over some of that to your actual life. Probably. Like the other guy, oh, fuck me. The other night, she was so... She went out, she was feeling so sick.

She needed to go to the Lou for a child. Don't be embarrassed. Come on. Oh, it was so bad guys Anyway, this fucking girl I thought I was gonna really be sick And I haven't been sick from booze in a long time I came up off a cigarette

It was wild No, that is hell Because there's nobody to get rid of that I was literally like Oh, I'm leaving the earth And I've had a vogue Like that's not right Like I mean I had a lot of tequila

Like a lot I had that other Brits When we were standing outside I was like And then I went to the Lou Wrenny And I was That was what happened So I was like I'm gonna be violently sick

But I was talking to this stranger This girl And anyway, so I go, right, and I was like, I was trying to mask still. I didn't even know this fucking girl. There was no need. But I was like, uh-huh, mm-hmm. She was telling me the story, uh-huh, mm-hmm. And about this friend that she like has a situation.

She said, blah, la, la. And I was like, I think we should go inside. And she was like, yeah, yeah, I'll come with you. And I was like, I think I need a way, like walking, retching as I walk, like genuinely, like, like, sitting up to my sternum. I go to the bathroom and I had hacked earlier that there was like an inclusive. toilet that was like gender neutral that was empty because it didn't look like it was open. So I went to walk in there and she was like, I'll come in with you. So then she comes in with me.

I would tell her about and say, I'm so sorry, you can't come in with me. So then I'm about to be sick, but I'm like, I cannot shunder in front of this girl, I don't know. So then I just sit on the toilet, have a wee with this girl who's still yapping my ear off about her situation ship, deeply trying to swallow my vomit. And it works. I wasn't sick. And that was pretty agreeable of me, I'd say. I reckon you could do with less agreeable. Come on in. Who else wants to come in?

You know what I mean? Anyway, that is quite enough for the start of this episode. So please join us in part two for your galley messages. Okay, galleyes, welcome back. Okay, what will we call the gallies this week? Well, I can't remember that girl's name. I met so many galley's on Saturday when I was, doodoo.

Can't remember any of their names. Okay, let's hear our first voice note. Normally Izzy would do this, but, you know, Izzy has an agenda, a diary of her own, apparently. Sorry, guys. Also, side note, new pens, Slay. And I don't know if anyone notice this, but this says leave a message now, these muffs. Does anyone seen our muffs? You like my muff.

And anyway, now I have to play this for myself. Hi, Ellie, Angie. I love the pod. Just wanted to send you a crazy thing that happened to me a couple of years ago when I was 24. basically when I was 24 I dated this police officer, met him and Hinge. It was all very exciting. Anyways, it was like a situation ship. I ended up ending it because you couldn't commit. A couple of months down the line after I ended up going to therapy

because my mind was just so messed up from this guy and from my work and all of that. And this therapist, she was a local therapist that she specialised in OCD. And so I go to her and she asked me for a timeline of my life, the good, the bad and all that. Anyway, to go through the timeline, we end up talking about this guy. And she says to me, hold up, I'm going to have to stop you right there. This sounds really familiar. Then she starts to tell me that she thinks one of her clients dated him. And this therapist knows so much about this guy, like, you know, what he looks like, where he works, his penis size.

She dated him. And she actually ends up also pulling out, like, her former client's files. No. To show me screenshots of text that she had of his and hers. I didn't go to this therapist after. I also found out that this therapist wasn't actually qualified. And I also found out that she was a relative of a good friend of mine. So yeah.

Crazy stuff. But I moved on now, happy, got a new boyfriend, got a new job. So, you know, life moves on. Well, that is conflict of interest. Can I just say? Yes. I know that I don't mean to defame, you know, the therapist community. But in this.

Hashtag not all therapists. In this country, it's too easy to call yourself a therapist if you're not a therapist. You have to like really do your research. Because look what's happened here. Well, also there's many different types of therapists is what I understand. The counsellors are not therapy. Counselor is not therapist. Exactly.

But then she's obviously branding herself as a therapist. That is fraud. That's fraud. That's fraud. You should be done for fraud. I would call that fraud. I think that's fraud. That is so bad.

Like, also it's one thing to say I'm clocking this. So maybe I can't work with you because. it's a conflict of interest, I'm guessing. Is it, though? If it's a third party, not really. Like, just don't say that you know, that your other, just, no need to say. But then I guess that, like, is that the whole thing

of, like, a therapist? Is that kind of, like, a transparency thing that is important? I don't know. I think that they can, like, objectively therapies you without needing to say. But can they? Because they've got context on that other person.

I don't actually know the rules. True. I don't know. But, like, how close is, like, too many close. like degrees of separation. Because if that's someone, A, she had dated or B, her best friend had dated, like that's blurring your... Okay, if your best friend dated him, but if your client dated him and you don't know him,

I don't think that is. I mean, I don't know, I don't know the rules. I don't know the rules. Because also imagine if your client dated him and you've worked with that client for like three years and you have your own, like, understand. I don't know. I don't know. It's not good.

Sometimes siblings go to the same... I don't actually think that they should, but sometimes siblings go to the same therapist because they already have the context on their parents and you need to explain. Oh my God. Imagine turning up your first therapy session being like, as you know. Hey, so as you know. As you know. Well, you know.

Yeah. That's basically it. The thing is, this is what I have about therapy a little bit because sometimes I think, and maybe this doesn't matter, I'm actually way too hung over to finish this thought. But I always think with therapy is like, because you can go and you can create the narrative within your therapy session. Like, it's your retelling of your own story. And maybe that's the point.

But actually, maybe therapy would actually be more beneficial if it was someone who actually had the, like, timeline and the narrative of your story, like, objectively or from different angles. But they actually knew it. Like, imagine if they'd been able to, like, watch a feature film on your life, an objective, like, doc, you know, a BBC doc, a neutral party doc, then they would have, like, context. And then the way that you tell your story would either fit or not.

and that would actually help with them being able to therapy as you better. But I guess maybe the point of therapy is not to have the facts. Exactly. It's to work through how you experience that. Actually, the whole point is that your story matters. Yeah. Like if you feel like X happened and X meant X, that's actually impacting you. So that's all the matters.

Yeah. And like your therapist being like, no, he didn't. Guys, I have to tell you this thing about my ex therapist. That I saw him for like over three years. I was a lot of, you know, deep work, actually. We really got in the weeds of it all. And, you know, I got lost along the wayside, to be honest, for a little while there. But he, the thing I really struggled with, and I know I will not be the only one, is that you, they know everything about your life so intimately and genuinely you don't even know their fucking partners.

You don't know anything about them. And I remember this one day, this was like two and a half years in. And I remember this one day, he always wore long sleeves. And I remember this one day it was really warm. And he was wearing like a looser long sleeve. And he lifted his arm up and his whole, I could see down his arm the whole thing was tattooed on. I literally had an identity crisis because I was like, oh wait, I am being therapist by like a member of like the biker gang or whatever. And I thought, oh my God, you're not who I thought you were.

You didn't know. It's like love is blind. I thought you were a doctor. Yeah. I thought you, you know, mental health professional. And mental health professionals can have tattoos. No, no. Not that they can't have tattoos.

It's just in my mind, that's not who you are. Yeah, like you'd imagined that he was like squeaky clean. Yes. Yeah. You go home, you know, you pray every night. Like, you'll just, you know when you see something about someone and you think, well, I remember my therapist when I first started. Sorry, we should say we're talking about therapies if it's like really like, you know,

normal, we understand that not everyone can afford to go to a therapist. But if you can, it's a great experience. Agree. I don't know what to tell you. It's brilliant. But I remember in the beginning, my therapist gave me this. like this contract that I had to sign and in it I could basically decide how I wanted to approach the situation if we ever saw each other outside of therapy. That was in writing. Yes. So like I could

say I don't want you to say hello to me and I don't want to say hello to you. What did you say? I think I said I wanted to like acknowledge your existence as a person but not like engage in conversation because they were sort of the options. Wow. Or like actually talk and be like hey how are you? Isn't that crazy? Yeah. Because like, so then if I, because imagine, imagine like therapists like party hard too. Imagine you see your therapist 3am in Dulston. Now I would have to just, you know, terminate services.

It would be this. I see you, sis, and I like you more now. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I think so like. But then you wouldn't be able to look her in the eye the next day, would you? Guys, you need to, if you can't, if you, if you don't go to therapy, honestly, search into TikTok there are all these people that are like,

drop into the comments, the best piece of advice your therapist ever. gave you. Oh yes, you can just take what you want from there. Genuinely, take what you want. Yeah, I like that. I like that. One of the things that I read that really stuck with me was that your feelings are not facts.

Amen. Don't ever forget that. Okay, now it's time for an email. I'm sorry about my husky voice when I read this to you. Do you want me to read? No, I think I can do it. Maybe people like it. I think people do like it.

The lower register. Hi, galleys. I am in urgent need of advice. I'm getting, babe, this one's for you. Come on. Are you concentrating? I'm concentrating. I'm getting married.

I know she's going to say. I'm getting married in December. And one of my bridesmaids has just texted me saying she doesn't think she can come to the hen, which is in less than a month. Even better. Perfect. That is not going to be this girl's reaction. And that she's struggling financially. She also said, I really want to make it to the wedding, but things are really tight right now.

Oh, dear. Neither the wedding nor the hen. require flights and I know my bridesmaids are all budget conscious. We're not going crazy for the hen. I've already offered to pay for their dresses and accessories, but she's still on the hook for the hotel, hair and the hendoo itself. I don't know what to say to her. Being a bridesmaid is a commitment and I really want her to be there for all the things, but I can't afford to cover her as well. Please help. Love you girls. Oh, that's tricky. I don't like money chat. Makes me uncomfortable.

Deeply, deeply. It's really hard because what are you to do? I know. You can't. You can't pay for her. You can't pay for her. I don't know if you have the ability to do this, but you could do a kind of payment plan situation.

Like, if you really want her there and she really can't come, could you... That's actually a good idea. Cover it. It's Clana. And she is going to pay you back and you know, especially if she's a good friend, like she's your bridesmae, so you trust her.

You know, you're going to get that money back eventually. but then I think that also is quite like an awkward thing to offer. Exactly. And it doesn't feel like, especially for the hender, it doesn't feel entirely necessary to me. Like if someone really can't afford to go and they're gutted about that, I kind of think that they could forego the hen. And that's not the end of the world.

I was going to say the same. I think like it's sad. But if that's like needs be, then yeah. Especially if her not coming to the hen then enables her to come to the wedding. I agree. It's really tricky. I don't know if there's ways that you can like help her like make the wedding. less expensive, for example, like knowing people that are also going that can give her a lift

or like if she's single, like a friend that she could share a room with so that then the cost is less or like all of those kind of things that you could help her with. But at the end of the day, if she doesn't have the money, she doesn't have the money. It's really hard because it's like, I don't know how far in advance you book these things. But at the time that you book it, I reckon you can guess if you can afford something, even if it was in a year, you might be able to like forward plan and be like, I don't know that I'm going to be able to before that I'm just going to say no now. Well, also you have to like prioritize that because it is a lot of the time it is about

where you're spending your money. Yeah. Like you might, like if it was your wedding and I knew that it was going to cost me a lot, I might forgo my South Street sale for six months and put that money somewhere so that I knew it's not going to be a real like tight pinch because you also want to be able to enjoy it. And if you're there thinking, oh my God, this has cost me X, X, Z. then you actually are better off not going in my opinion.

A hundred percent. And like you, you can grieve that and that's really sad that she won't be there on your hand. But it is much better that she's not there than there and like kind of begrudging the fact that she's happened to spend a lot of money to be there. I agree. I think this happens a lot as well at this time. Like, weddings are a whole different ballgame, but just in general I think are like, I don't know how old you are. But I think when you get to your late 20s, there can be quite a kind of. a disparity between what people are earning and how much disposable income everyone has.

And it's really hard because your Hindu is only fun if you're with the people you love. Like, do you know what I mean? Whether it costs like five million pounds or five pounds. Like it's more fun being with the people that you love. So then that's really difficult. But it's really hard because it does really sound like you've really made an effort. Because I think when you're in that disparity, the only thing that you can do is cater for people. Like you can't you don't need to cater for the people who've got the money cater for the people who don't have the money.

Exactly. And if you have done that, then there's really not much more you can do sadly. Yeah. I think the payment plan is a good thing. But I also do think she has to decide whether she wants to like, it's up to her ultimately, whether she comes, for example, takes you up on like paying you back. Which if it was me, I would do. But then it's hard because it's like you want her to be there, but you don't want her. you want her to be there because you love her and because she loves you,

but you don't want her to ever begrudge her owing you money for your wedding. Yeah. It's a very, very difficult dynamic. It is. And also, like, we all understand that you are asking a lot of people. But then also, I think once you start planning a wedding, you understand how much it's costing you. It's hard as well with a bridesmaid because it's like,

if you were just a random person, I wouldn't expect that of you. This is a thing. In the beginning, in the dream world, she would have said. That's what I mean? When you get the invite. I know what comes. with being a bridesmaid and I want to do that for you but at the same time I don't know that I can. I can afford that. Do you know what I mean? Because I think it does cost you money to go to a wedding,

especially if you're a bridesmaid because you do go on the hen and you are there for, for example, you're always there the night before or like whatever. You are paying more. She would have, I think you can know that. I think in, like, the thing that would annoy me is that you've left it so late that she said it's so late to be like now I can't afford it and it's like well why have you not said that six months ago when you yeah it the price has like gone through something yes that like has financially like impacted her I guess we have this conversation all the time about like that thing of when you get to this age and you do start earning different amounts to all of your friends that you it's really weird at this stage in life because up until now you've probably all been

on the same kind of to that you were all at school you had no money you're all at you know you had no money you all got your first jobs you kind of had no money you all got your first jobs you kind of money. Like by now, people have like kind of like gone different paths and so there can be this greatest part. It can come out in even the restaurants that you pick to go for dinner with your friends. And it's, I know for a fact that it happens to many, many, many, many, groups, many, many groups of friends where what, like the end, what ends up happening is that some people begrudge it. And then it's just like this really horrible dynamic and there has to be a better away, first of all, we've got to stop avoiding talking about it. This whole thing of like,

money's uncomfortable. You've got to talk about it because then everyone can get on a level to be like, I can't afford to go to that restaurant for your birthday. Do you mind if we go for a coffee just me and you? I don't want to go to that really expensive restaurant. I don't have that kind of money. No problem. Let's do something. Like, there's so many ways around it if you just talk about it. Yeah. And if you have the awareness to be like, I know that this is going to cost you X, like, especially with like a wedding or a birthday or like whatever you're asking of people. Like, I know that this is expensive. So, like, thank you for, like, you know.

Like, yeah, I don't know. I think... It's hard because when you're the person who's earning more money, the only thing you can do is be aware. Yes, exactly. But if you're the person that's not earning more money, the only thing that you can do is communicate. So that's fine.

You're never going to actually come to a compromise because there is no compromise. Also, sometimes it's not even about earning money. It's about what you want to spend your money on. True. True. Like, sometimes it genuinely is that thing. True. Because then also you can have it the other way around.

I don't know what your friend does, but imagine you see her then like out every weekend. Going on South Street sale. Aesos parcels or like whatever it is. And then you're like, okay, so you have got some money. Like it's where you want to spend your money. And then sometimes that's uncomfortable. Because you just have to say.

Yeah. Like you, I think sometimes as well we rely on that as an excuse. I don't think this is the situation here. I'm sure she wants to be your bridesmaid and be at the wedding and I'm sure she's heartbroken and that she can't afford to be. but sometimes like especially like a birthday dinner or like a extra hen if they're having two hens or like whatever like you'll say oh it's just a bit expensive like there's a cop out sometimes that is a cop out and like you use that as an excuse and it's like is that an excuse yes or do you not want to spend your money on that so fine it's your money you get up in the morning and earn it whether you're earning five pound an hour or 500 thousand pounds an hour it doesn't matter it's your money so what you spend that money on it's your prerogative but you have to communicate that it's hard it's really really, really difficult. You just need to talk to her.

It's the only way you just need to like talk it out and see what she's comfortable with. Also it's really hard because normally like in your normal day to day life, this shit doesn't crop up unless it is like a big life event. Yeah. Like this is not going to affect your friendship. So that's why it always comes up birthdays and weddings. All like hendos, baby shout, like big life events tend to bring up these kinds of conversations. And so I think as well, like if you have, if you can,

everyone knows that they have like who that friend is going to be. That's actually true. For that one person. Yes. And talk about it before it even becomes a problem. Hey babe, I know that this is going to be a lot. How are you feeling about that?

Can I help? Do you know what I mean? If you don't want to do it, no problem. We'll just do something like. Pressure's off. Yes. But this is what I would really like to do. Yeah.

Come. Like if you, I would love for you to come. If you don't want to be a part of it because you don't want to spend that money, I completely understand. There's so many ways around it, you just have to talk about it. Yeah.

Good luck. And happy wedding. Happy wedding. Love a winter wedding. I really love it. I think it's so chic. Okay. It's time for the galley gossip.

It's time for the galley gossip. This is essentially, you know, gossip mining, gossip maxing. Why is everyone maxing all the time? I don't know where that started from. Who did that? Babe, did you see the solo? By the way. Yeah.

Did you actually see it? Yeah. Why didn't I see any pictures? Did you see that thing on my eye? I don't know if I said you the picture. I woke up like three days after the solar eclipse and I had this fucking red dot in my eye and I thought, oh my God, I've burnt my retina. I'm going to die. Anyway, I didn't die.

And I was like, I think it was actually from where I put my contact in wrong. Not solar eclipse. Yes, I saw the solar eclipse. Was it amazing? Yes. No. Like you would have wanted to have been in like. one of those places where it went completely dark.

Like London, it wasn't the place to watch it and be like, wow, what a phenomena. Right, okay. To be honest. Got it. Okay. We've got a voice-aid from a galley who has gone undercover to investigate the growing epidemic of men sharing news. What? I don't know about this epidemic.

I'm not getting any of these nudes. Why can't I be involved in this epidemic? I don't know about this epidemic either. That's something I want to. I would catch that. Why is that not? I do think you want to catch that, babe. There people said, that's why now on an airdrop you have to put the code in because too many men were sharing

that unsolicited news. I never got that. You never got that. Never. I know. How sad. Exactly. First of all, love you girls. I am literally watching your episode now while I'm Peyton the limerrim and talking about nudes. You just said, how would somebody know if your ex-partner has ever showed them to anybody? Well, I've got an ex-friend, ex-friend because of what she did, which I'm about to say. She basically sat with her best friend's boyfriend and her best friend found out because said boyfriend received nudes from my ex-friend

and sent them in his boys group chat. Now in that boys group chat, one of them sang fuck had the decency to message the girlfriend by the way your boyfriend's just sent your friend's nudes. So he's cheating on you. And I just think, what a way to get caught out? So yeah, that's why she's my ex-friend because she cannot be trusted. And that's what guys do with nudes. It was. wasn't even his girlfriend's nude, it was who he was cheating on his girlfriend with. So, got it. There you go. The audacity to not only send a picture of a nude into a group chat, but also a nude of someone

that is not your girlfriend. And the problem is, you're sending that thinking, the boys won't mind, the boys won't say, thank God for the rat. Thank God. Thank God for that little rat. Thank God. That just scurried away and told the girlfriend, thank God. That's gross, man.

I'm actually hit, man. That is gross man That's gross man That is gross man That is gross man If ever I've heard of a gross man That's a gross man Gross man

I've heard about this too much You know I've had a few I've had a few stories like this Votname and Shame Or where I was But I was out And about

As I've been since you've been away Guys It's actually been a problem Al's been away And we were like vlogging Every vlog I was drunk Got hung over It was so bad

I needed her back To keep me in check It was really bad You know, I was out and about, I had a few wines. And I was speaking to someone. I didn't know about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you don't know about this. This is what I hate.

This is my whole thing about going away. It's I come back. And I feel like you're a stranger. I literally don't know you. I feel like I've done a lot to be fair. I've been moving a bit mad, I would say. I see that. I see that clearly now.

I've been a gross man. Sorry, I have to tell you to just pause your story. No, please. I went to this 30th the other day and this girl came up to me and she was like, she was the sister of the girl whose birthday it was and she came up to me she was like oh hi I said I'm I'm Ali I haven't like met you la la and she goes oh this is really embarrassing

why I actually know who you are because I worked for a PR company that represents actors and then she goes oh um gee is actually besties with one of my client's girlfriends and I literally looked at her and I thought bestie the fuck who the fuck. She's going around telling people she's besties with some. That's simply not right.

Anyway, I've now uncovered that that was not her words. No, not my words. Because, you know, obviously there would be issues. Those words were put in my mouth. I never put those words in my mouth. But yeah, this shit happens. Especially when you're away. I don't know.

I see that now. So anyway, I've been out. I've been about. Right. I've been talking to some girls. Right. I'm making friends. I don't know what to tell you.

Right. Anyway, she tells me about this girl who is a friend of hers, that in a group, like a friendship group. and this girl has slept with one of the other friend's boyfriends whilst the friend is pregnant. With that boy? Yes. Her friend and her boyfriend happily having a baby and she sleeps with him.

Does the friend know? Yeah, they've all know now. And they're still dead together? Oh, I don't know. She's fucking pregnant. It's awful. That is awful. This shit.

You think this stuff is made up and then boom. I don't think it's made up. I know this is happening on the street. It's happening on the street. It's not even on the street. It's in the fucking, it's in the people's living ones. Actually, we're a bit safer on the street. I agree.

Everyone on the streets is actually quite morally like coded. It's everyone that came off the streets and they're like, oh, the streets look nice. Let me behave like I'm on the streets in a house. You're not on the streets. I agree. So you can't behave like you're on the streets when you're in a house. And I've been thinking about that girl whose boyfriend wanted a threesome.

He wants to be single. I've been thinking about that a lot. She's not gay. Because I approved the pod last week, obviously, as I do every week. And I was really thinking about that girl and I was like, that's not right. He wants to be single and he's using you as a, vessel to get with another girl. It's fucking bullshit. Sorry. Amen. And you can't hide that shit as a

kink. Because that is kink shaming. That is wearing, it's all kink shaming. It's wearing culture as costume. Okay. And we do not approve of that. Thank you. That is actually cultural appropriation to people that actually want threesome. Exactly. And then go out of their way to live that life. I agree. I agree. Okay. Well, I'm glad we put the world to rights. Amen. If you want to get involved in next week's galley gossip, send us a DM on Instagram or drop us a comment on YouTube or Spotify to be features. By the way, I really love the Spotify comments. Slow. I really, I don't look at them.

I read them. I think they're brilliant. I had loads of DMs last week about people wanting to voice note in, so I'm hoping that you have done that and voice noted, leave a message pod. Anyway, please let us know what you loved or hated in this air by commenting on Spotify, YouTube or wherever you are listening. And if you've got a story or dilemma that only we can help you with, then please send a voice note to our WhatsApp on 07342-61797992. Or you can click the link in the episode.

description. You can also send us an email at hello at leave a messagepod.com. Bye.