Leave A Message with Ally & G - He Slept With His COUSIN?? And We’re Worried About The Devil Wears Prada 2…

Episode Date: April 29, 2026

Ally and G have been trapped in delivery driver hell this week, as parcel after parcel keeps mysteriously vanishing into thin air. The girls are also deeply concerned that their ultimate comfort film is about to be absolutely ruined by the upcoming sequel to The Devil Wears Prada.PLUS, one Gally is convinced her ex-boyfriend has left her for his cousin, while another is dealing with the nightmare of her documentary being STOLEN by her own collaborator.FANCY SENDING A VOICENOTE/MESSAGE GALLY? Send your voice note to: https://wa.me/message/UH4DASEKPFQBA1 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (Oh, and don’t leave out ANY of the juicy details!)OR, you can write us email an on [e-mail] us at @leaveamessagepodcast on socials!Listen every Wednesday wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You have reached leave a message with me, Ali. And me, G. This is a podcast where we help the galleys in need. Whether you found yourself deep in a full-blown imagination ship. Or your psychics just told you there's a cowboy riding into your future. Yaha! This is a podcast for you. You know, every time I say that, I think about that World War I post.

Every time, we need you. Yes. Well, we do need you. We should do a little AI image of you with the hat on doing the you. We need you. We do need you. We do need you. Desolly.

Delisely. I was just, prior to starting recording, I was just having some gripes with her... I've got beef. Is it relay? Yes. Relay. Well, relay, but also DPD.

DPD, fuck DPD. Sorry. No, no. Famously, fuck DPD. No, no. I know. DPD were the bastards that told me they delivered that iPhone 15. Did I see an iPhone 15?

No, I didn't. And then they wouldn't pay me back and I had to re-buy. The only ones that I actually like are the actual Royal Mail. My actual Royal Mail postman is reliable. My man with his trolley. I love him. But all these... He knows my safe place.

Cowboy delivery drivers just driving around, dropping parcels. I was in my house. This, I honestly, I could talk for three hours on how wrong this is. You could petition. You could take to the streets. I genuinely think because you cannot say you attempt to delivery when you didn't even ring my fucking doorbell. I was in my house. Also, I said, hey, for next day delivery for a year, for this shitty service.

Yes. Sorry, yes. No more words than that because it's very frustrated to make the next day and not get next day. And it's not even ASOS's fault. It's the, it's the, it's the, what's the other thing? I love my relay. My relay driver's great. Every.

I've had some problems with. Also, I've had it where they've literally, I obviously, like, I have a gate. They've literally flung it over the fence, over the gate. Fragile? Yeah. Can't be flinging things over gates. This one guy, this is not a joke. Once I ordered, it was on House of CB stuff that I couldn't find.

For Love Island. When I, babe, he put it, you know, like, from the outside, through the gate into the hedge. It was in the hedge. I'm like, listen, I don't want to tell you how to do your job. I don't want to actually drive. Because you're an expert in your field. But... That's looking wrong.

Can I give some feedback? A little feedback form, if you will. Anyway, this is my current gripe with the state of the world. Tell me what my gripe was. So we're going to an event later. And I don't really know, but Al's convinced it's red carpet Getty. I think there will be Gettys, yeah. Hell and horror.

I'm almost certain there will be Gettys. So Al is like constantly on at me when we like, she's obviously our stylist. and when she, when Hannah Beck isn't, you know, in our... Working on about her magic, yeah. Exactly. And I will be like, this is the dress, this is the dress. Lala, I do as I'm told it. I'm like, yeah, love it, whatever.

I will not try that dress on until like two minutes before. This week she's like, babe, you need to try the dress on. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, really putting it off. I did. But like, it was one of those where I was like, okay, I know this is a two-man job. Like, I couldn't... Right.

And I'm just now hoping. that my guesstimation is right, that that is going to go together. Okay, well, we need to do some work here because what happens? The zip was gaping. If at 5 o'clock, you can't get that zip up. What are we going to do? I literally haven't thought of a solution yet. Right.

Well, get pinking. Apart from, I literally text holes and I was like, what time is your day? And she was like, told me and I was like, okay, well, I'm going to have to be in the dress for an hour then. Because I'm going to have to put me in it before you leave. Right. Because it's, it's a, I'll be fine. I just won't be able to breathe. That's fine.

Yeah. I don't need to breathe. Auctions not necessary. Exactly. No. I just don't like it. I'm a bad clothes tryer on her. I really am.

I don't. But, but. But can I just, why do you not like to try them on? Don't like it. But why? I'm comfortable, overstimulated. I don't like it. Also denial.

Because I'm like, if I don't know it doesn't fit, it fits. You're crazy? Uh-huh. She's crazy. She's crazy. She's lost her hair. But also, no, no, listen, we will get there one day. It's like the imagination ship thing.

Like, if my head, he's my boyfriend, he's my boyfriend. If in my head there's no red flags, there's no red flags, the dress fits. Got it. Until I, me and that zipper are on a floor and I'm dislocating the rib. Sometimes you have a thing where you think you're 20 stone. You do. I do. We're like, I wouldn't, we had, there was this one dress.

Do you remember that white dress? Oh, no, what dress. That white dress in biotation that had those like, curls on the side and I put it on first. And I was like, no, no, I think you can wear this. And you're like, that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my life. Obviously, if you can wear that, I can't wear that. Obviously, it fit her, like, first try.

And I'm like, you live in an alternate universe where like it doesn't zip up, but it will zip. Also, this is our stock line. It's not you. It's the zip. Oh, it's the zip. And I thought that yesterday when I tried the zip, I thought, tough zip. Tough zip. Two man zip.

Yeah. It's not a one man zip. It's that seam. It's a scene. Yeah. It's famously the scene. Where my waist is. Yeah.

It's the scene. Exactly. Yeah. And this got me thinking actually about devil wears Prada because I was like, okay, obviously that whole like scene where they're in like the wardrobe and it's like endless clothes is like heaven. But also imagine the pressure of being on like that press tour. Like that is you've got to turn up looking 10 out of turn on that press tour. That's where you've got to have a shit hot stylist.

Yeah. Yeah. Like, also, I was thinking about Simone Ashley because I was like, tricky for her because she's... Oh, I didn't like Simone Ashley's... No, but babes, I was thinking about it. This babes thing is going to tip me over the pocket. You hate it. We're like, call Holly now.

It's her. It's not me. No, no, sorry. Continue around Simone. Yeah, so she... She can't be the best dress. Exactly. She can't.

She's not in the A cast. She's the B cast. Well, Charlie X, the X's stylist talked about this about Wothering Heights. And he basically was saying, like, you know, Margo is the bride in this film and Charlie's the bridesmaid. Yes. So, like, you have to, like, that, you can't ever be best dressed if you're not the lead. Yes.

But I do think you can be, like, not the biggest bestest and still be really, like, I think there are some celebrities, the ones that I love the most who have found their own style. And, like, not necessarily best dressed, but, like, it's true to them and it's authentic. Like, Charlie XXX is so gothic. And, like, all of her fit. know like Margo was like wearing all the most amazing archival pieces. Like Charlie still looked really like Charlie XX, yeah. And I don't think Simone Ashley's found her personal style.

There are a few celebrities that I think really nail it actually. Like I also, I'm always on these algorithms about how like Kylie Jenner basically wears the same dress every time in a different colour. Like it's always like slim and then like she likes her boobs out. Like it's always the same. The same cut. Same cut. Apart from famously the Met Gala with that huge.

huge skirt in the backward cap. No, but even then it was fitted up here. True. And her tits were out. No. High neck. Oh yeah, you're right. Sorry.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, guys. So sorry to not know the archival pieces of Kylie Jenna. But I think like Meryl Streep's done been my best dress, actually. She looks. Because she looks like, phenomenal. She does. She does.

And also, can I just say, Merrill Streep, I know you shouldn't really comment on this because it's just like, you know, so boring. But she is aging so well. I know. Because she like looks her age, but she looks so well. like really well. I think it's the sunglasses though. Yeah, maybe.

No, maybe it is. Don't know what she's hiding under there. Who else? I haven't. I liked, I loved Emily Blunt's Scaparrelli dress. She looked amazing. Obviously Zendaya is like the queen of...

Zendaya, yeah, at what at Euthoria? Just like in general, I just think like her styling is just 10 out of 10. Yeah. I liked what she did for the drama, something old, something new, something boring, something really, I loved that. Really clever. I just think, like, that's why I like Margo Robby. They're clever.

They think about it. And like, everything's really. intentional whereas like Simone Ashley just rocked up in a pink dress I just thought didn't do it for me justice for Simone Ashley justice for Simone Ashley it's a hard cast to be next to because also there's three brides on that press tour well also four including Stanley no sorry the all's fair press tour every single every single one of those women on every single day looked fucking sleigh yeah there wasn't one miss that's what I mean that it's like being part of a girl band or like pussycat doll that you can't be off your body.

beat. No, you can't be off your be. And that is a lot of pressure. Well, it isn't, it isn't babe, because when you have that many people working to make you that look that good. Genuine, you just have to stand there, get your hair and makeup done and put the clothes on. It's not that hard. You literally are a vehicle. You don't really do anything. No. Good point. Anyway, that's my thoughts on the matter. Yeah, well, great thoughts. I feel, I have that, I have that thing that I had about Freakier Friday where I feel like a tiny bit nervous for the devil wears Prada. Because, like, I want it to be so good. I think. I think. I think I think I have this sometimes with TV shows, not with films so much. Sometimes when something's

had so much hype, I almost can't watch it. I know, like, you need to watch it in your own time in a dark room and then like process your thoughts, like independently of everyone else's. Like I'd never watch Saltburn. Oh, Saltburn was phenomenal. I know, but you know when it's just like, when everyone's talking about it and then I get nervous. I see. See, I don't have that with like hyped films, but I do have it with sequels or like remakes because I'm like, okay, if I loved the first then I need to like, and I will be almost heartbroken if you take it away from me. And then I wish I wouldn't have watched. For example, I had it with Bridget Jones, mad about the boy.

Because I was like, okay, the Bridget Jones films for me are like somewhere like woven into my soul. Like I know all the words and I like grew up on like watching the films and the books and like they're just like so nostalgic to me. And then I was so nervous to watch that film because I was like, what if I hate it? And what if I hate the full film? I actually didn't. But then I kind of had to talk to myself

and be like, you have to see it as something different. Well, that's why I was just about to say you can't really see like 20 years as a fucking long time. Yeah. You have to see it as a new film. But I did actually, I loved it. I thought it was good.

I love Rennaz Out of all the eyes. I think Devereux Prada is in my top five films of all times. Exactly. So aren't you nervous? What if it's not what you want it to be? No, because I have no expectation. I also sometimes really trust like when people, it's quite rare for people to do like a nostalgic sequel

and to fuck it. up that badly. You have to trust that like the people that are making it like, no, no what's up. And also I guess like Meryl's back. Meryl wouldn't do it if it was shite. They did something like that. There was a film a couple of years ago or something where like they basically changed the whole cast and it was like, oh, what was it?

Oh, gossip girl. Oh. Obviously that was shit because it was just not gossip girl. Yeah, so call it something else. Do you what I mean? Yeah. But if it's not that or like I'm nervous for. Harry Potter because Harry Potter is like But even then I'm like

It always something different Exactly and also it's a TV series So it's like it's different already And the casting is obviously so different So like that's kind of that you can see that as a different thing Like I'm a huge Game of Thrones fan House of the Dragon It was different enough that I was like

Okay well I'm not like comparing the two actually You know? Yes We saw sorry Oh my God what are you going to say About who we saw Thingy from rivals And Amelia Clark

Oh, yeah. See, I was so unbothered by Amelia Clark because... I don't think I've ever really watched anything with Amelia Clark in it, other than... Me before you, is that Amelia Clark? Yeah, that's the other girl, isn't that? No, that, isn't that? Game of Thrones, Amelia Clark. Yeah, I didn't... I can't. I can't do the Game of Thrones. Al got to the Red Wedding and then she thought too dark. I can't. It's too much for me that.

It actually doesn't get darker than that. Like, that is the worst, most shocking piece of television I've ever witnessed in my life. And then it just, like, kind of like, doesn't actually get that much worse than that. Because it's literally like, it can't get worse than stabbing that pregnant woman. Sorry, that's awful. Yeah. But we were basically coming out of Soho House and we were standing outside, funning around, waiting for Olivia.

And at the exact same moment as each other, Amelia Clark walked out and Rupert Campbell Harris. Rupert Campbell Black. Sorry, Rupert Campbell Black. I don't actually know the actor's name. That's awful. From rivals walked it. They pretty much crossed each other. I was like this.

I didn't even see him. Was he short? He's tiny. Yeah. Yeah. So was Amelia. Tiny's strong. No.

I don't know why I think I'm the big bad giant. 5-8. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 5-10, actually, probably, just below. 5-9. A 5-10 is not tiny. Sorry, excuse me. Tell your boyfriend that.

But he's slight. Your boyfriend's not sorry. No, no, no, true. He's not wafer thin. No, no, no, and he's also not built to be thin. What's some grey for black? Wafin. I don't know whether he was wafer, but I think he was like, you know, shortbread thin.

Right. Shortbread thin. I'd say shortbreadth is quite, quite, you know, shocking. Well, like a shortbread's like quite chunky, a wafer's thin. Got it. Like a shortbread. Halfway. Yeah.

Caster cream. is what he was, yeah. I reckon I back myself to pick him up in a building. Got it. Got it. You know what I mean? Yeah.

It was one of them. Amelia's Tiny. Yes. She and I would back myself to say she's tiny. Yes. We've got a good gauge of tiny because our manager Lily Modeling is famously five foot. She's four nine actually. Do you know?

Is she actually? Yeah. Four nine? Wait, four ten. What's the one below four eleven? Four eleven. Four nine is small. Four eleven.

Four eleven, yeah. I think she's four eleven. Isn't she four eleven? Isn't she just below five foot? Without those platform mugs. She's 411. Yes. 5-1 in a platform mug. Whoa.

Top shell. So we've got a good gauge on tiny. Yes, we have. I think Courtney Kardashian's about at the same height as little. So many people that we see now. Also, like many people will come up to us and be like, oh my God, you're so tall. I didn't think you'd be tall.

Because famously famous people are short. They're so short. What is that? Must be some kind of like deep-rooted, like Freudian concept about like you feel small in the world so you need to make yourself big. Possibly. And that's why they're all famous. Seeking fame.

Yeah, they are. Most of them are tiny actually. Yeah, really small. Weird. I know. Sharon Osbourne. Oh, no. Sharon Osbourne is a baller.

So tiny. We were like this. Sharon! Sharon! Down there like that. Ozzy was small too though, I think. Kelly's tiny. Yeah.

Also, they were all wearing six inches on that night. So I can only am, honestly, I'll be crawling around on the fucking floor trial. to have a conversation with them. It's been a long time since we've gone out in six inches. It's been a long time. I would honestly, I would do it. I just, you feel like you're on,

this is why I think about tall people in general. Yeah. You live on a different sphere to the rest of us. You miss jokes. Yeah. You do. You're not living with the rest of us. You're living like up here.

The altitude's different. The oxygen intake's different. You have a different perspective. They are different. You do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

But then same than I think about movie. through the world as a Lily Modlin or Sharon Osbourne. I'm like, I don't know what that would be like, I don't know your experience. They must have awful their cake. Do you think? That's why Lil's jaw so fucked. I'm sure of it. Because she's always... Her jaw! That's her jaw got to do with it.

When you look up, the jaw muscles are engaged. They just do that. I thought that when I was kissing that boy the other day. Exactly. Because I was like, God, he's too. And I'm tall. Yeah. This is what I'm saying. And Marv... Okay, my friend Margot, I love her. I love you so much.

I on this podcast did say that I disagree with five foot five girls being with six foot five. Yeah. Boys and I think Marv is actually for your health more than anything because how are you straining your neck that much? You're living on two different like planes. That's what I'm saying. Yes. That is what I'm saying. So actually now I'm kind of thinking like same height couples is like such a sleigh rather

than that like big, big height difference. Like you and your partner. What? You and your foot partner? Guys, guys, we were just talking on. I'm gearing up to start saying fiancé. I'm not going to call him my fiancé. I just want to put that out there right now.

Producer Izzy, we will be saying, oh, how is your fiancé? Oh, is that? And when you say, Danny, who are you talking about? I don't know him. Please can you explain who Rory, poor he is? We will not accept answers other than my fiancé. And I will say our fiancé.

Obviously our fiancé. Imagine if he buys me like a dummy ring, wouldn't that be fun? And I'll start wearing one too just to be involved. Oh, that'd be nice. That'd be nice. Yeah. Maybe we can talk about it next week. Guys, I'm not going to lie to you.

Okay, I'll talk about this next week. Yeah, you hold the phone caller. Sorry, sorry. Okay. You park that, leave a message. We'll talk about it next week. Thank you. Okay, join us in part two for your galley messages. Okay, galleys, welcome back.

What should we call the galleys this week? We better call them Meryl in honour of Meryl. Streep, that is. Okay, let's hear our first voice note. Hey, galleys, a lovely message, and I've always wanted to send a voice note. So I'm so glad I finally have a juicy enough story to send him. Love. Just for a bit of context, I was with my ex for like two years, and honestly, it was super smooth sailing.

However, last summer, he goes away for a family member's birthday, and he barely sleep. me the whole time. His phone kept me seriously dying, like every night whilst he was out on this trip, so I started to feel like something just wasn't right. Anyway, he gets back home and the next day it's results day. So we go to our friend's house to celebrate and he just won't talk to me. Then, as he gets drunker, he suddenly tells me he's not happy. So yeah, we break up. Then a few days later, I see on social media that his step-cous, who was on the trip group, also broke up with her boyfriend on the exact same day. So obviously, me and my friends message her, but she was really, dismissive and then she messages him straight away to tell him we've asked about it, which is just

not very girls' girl. So at this point I was like, okay, something's off. So I took up on myself to message his brother, who is an absolute high. And he tells me that actually my ex and his cousin were staying in the same house the whole time, even though my ex had told me he was sharing a room with his granddad. And apparently they were being really flirty, like to the point that family members that he'd even had to pull them up on it. So of course, I call my ex, and to this day he still denies that anything happened beyond them just getting along.

He has said that he recognises that he disrespected me, but that is literally as far as it goes. So girls, do you think I'm crazy for telling everyone that I got dumped because he got with his cousin, or would you be thinking the exact same thing? Oh my God. Sorry, I'm actually a little bit lost. There's a lot of family dynamics here.

Well, park a few of them. Don't worry about the granddad. he's irrelevant. He's, he's pervy. Is that what she was saying? No. I don't think she ever said the granddad was pervy. You've jumped there.

He's taken a leak. You said something was dirty. The granddad was dirty. I don't think that happened. Producer Izzy, please help. Help me. He had said that I'm going to stay in a room with my granddad, but then it turns out he was sharing with the step-cous.

Yeah. He was in the house with the step-cous. He never said my granddad's a pearl. He's a dirty old bird. Which is what you are. She said dirty. She definitely said he was kind of dirty. You need help.

Did he not say that? Guys, rewind the tracks. Fact check, fact check. Even though my ex had told me he was sharing a room with his granddad. Okay, anyway, basically, babes, all you need to know is that this guy, I don't think you are having a leap and a jump here. Because, number one, they are cousins, but they're step cousins. And listen, ill-advised, but not illegal. Exactly that.

That's exactly it in the famous words of. Yes. That's exactly, it's not illegal. It's not wrong, but it's not right. Is what I'm seeing here. And it sounds to me like all roads do in fact lead to Rome. I also love the fact that she messaged everyone she could, like shamelessly. Like, I'm obsessed with that.

because I had that with my ex when I found out that he had that new girlfriend. I kind of wanted to message everyone but I was too embarrassed to show I cared. Like when the hell did he find the time to find this girl? Was there an overlap? Is what I wanted to say.

But I didn't obviously because none of my business. I think in this instance you can correctly assume. Yeah. And do you know what? Spread what you want. Give a shit. Tell everyone he shied his cousin. Who cares?

I agree. And leave out the step. I agree. Defamation. You don't owe him nothing. He also, I hate, so I hate more than anything and I've had this

far more than I would like to admit when you're dating someone or you're going out with someone or you've been with someone for like years and they just go cold. It's like they turn the heating off and it's like just say

like you could say like you've obviously come to the realization that you don't want to be with me anymore you don't like overnight you don't love me apparently. Like what is the like cooling off period of just being like no reply and like a bit cold and a bit like cold shoulder.

I hate that. Just dump me straight up. Yeah. I guess what it is is it's a kind of like method to not shock anyone. But I don't think I think everyone's going to be like shocked either way. I agree. The cold shoulder is shocking and the dumping is shocking. So just say it with your chest.

The thing is there's no good way to break up with anyone. No good way. There is no right. Everyone's like, oh, I wish she'd done that. You don't wish it. If he's done X and you wish he'd done Y. But if you've done Y, you would wish he did Z. Like, you know, there's just no, there's no.

Well, there is one right way. Don't shag your step, cousin. That's a wrong way. If ever I've heard it. Do you know what I like to fly the flag for in breakups? Text. Or the phone. A phone call.

Everyone's got this big thing. I broke up with my partner after three and a half years over the phone. Because you were a coward. No. Because. No. Yes. No, because we were long distance.

And you were cowardly. You wanted me to drive to South Wales. I definitely didn't want you to do that. I definitely agree. I think that was the right thing to do. However, I just think sometimes if he was in their own space. Yeah, okay, maybe. But I just sometimes think there's something to be said for like doing the actual horrible bit over the phone where everyone's in their own space and then maybe going to meet up.

giving some closure. No, I think it's a one and done. I don't like this whole drawn-out breakup situation. Oh, really? I just think, what's said is said, what's done is done? What is there to close? Finish, case closed. We're done now.

I've said to you, we're done. That's it. Terminator. Yeah. That's what I mean, though. Like, I agree. In your instance, definitely that was the right thing to do. But I'm just saying, like, I don't think that there is a, like, he definitely

wouldn't have thought that. So if you're the person that's being dumped. You can't do right. Yeah, you can't. Yeah, because there is no nice way to be done. There is. There isn't. Yeah.

I just hate the whole like, you know, also I hate the thing that it makes you like second guess. Like you know that, like, on this holiday, for example, you know he's being a bit suss. But like, you're kind of having to be like, oh no, maybe his battery is just dead. Maybe he is just having a nice time with his granddad. Sorry. Can we stop excusing this battery dead bullshit? Phone got no service, got no Wi-Fi. It's horseshit.

There's men on the moon. Thank you. We're orbiting the moon, guys. We've got a live stream. Do you know what I mean? To the back of the moon. You can send a text when you're sharing a room with your granddad, allegedly. Legitly, your dirty granddad.

Furby, dirty granddad. I don't even have step cousins. I have a half cousin. I wouldn't shag him. That would be wrong to be fair. It's really weird. Oh, can I be honest? As someone with the...

Oh, not illegal. An advice we're not illegal. No, wait. Your half cousin must be related to you. No, because it's my, not my blood, it's my, not my blood uncle. So then they're not, your half-cousin. Well, they're my, they're my cousin's half-brother.

They're my cousin's half-brother. Yes. But with my cousin, I only share the maternal side. I don't actually think there's a name for that. I don't know what that is, but don't shag them. Literally that simple. No need to dwell. Can I tell you?

This is like that film. Imagine Al goes, can I tell you? I have shagged my step-cousin and it was good. And I liked it. I enjoyed it thoroughly. So, you know, don't knock it till you've tried it. Don't knock it till you've tried it. No, I was just going to say, I think it's, listen, I've never been in the situation because

I don't have any step siblings, thank God. You're going to talk about that film where they, the parents got together, but they weren't related and then they started. Yeah. Having it. And I do know that, you know, having a step, anyone come into your life is a little confusing because you do think you're cosplaying someone to me that you are simply not. Yes.

You are not my dad. Solution. Shagab. Basically, yeah, especially, like, I could only imagine if I inherited a step brother or sister, listen, I'm not saying I would fancy them, but I definitely wouldn't, they, they don't fit into a category of anywhere proper. Yeah, and it is tricky, so I'm not justifying your boyfriend's behaviour. Obviously, so shocking good ridden, thanks God, he's an ex. Thanks, God.

Thanks, God. Thanks, God. Just doing place, there's a few of you up there. I don't want to single anyone out. I don't want to be refused entry. Thank God's. Thanks, gods. I want to get in on that door.

Oh, you're cracking me off at the moment. My ID for the energy to heaven, that's all I do. Me too. Pergatory's not for me. I can't go to pergatory because I won't be good there. Babe, I have really bad news. Everyone apparently is going to purgatory. According to this Christian expert on Stephen Bar.

You've got to stop listening to Stephen Barlow. We're going to lead you to the Manosphere soon. We're going to lose you to the black hole of the Christian monosphere. I don't know how to get you back from there. You're making me cry. You're so funny at the first. This Christian guy had listened to two hours. That's all right.

We've got a business to run. How are you finding two hours in the day to listen to a Christian man speak about purgatory? He said everyone's going to purgatory. You know, I'm sure. I'm sure I'm going to skip pergatory straight down. Unless you, we, I mean, I've got more of a chance than you. You've got much more of a chance. Of heaven?

Yes. Yes. No, I know. But I am living in Sid as a you. So I think we're both fucked essentially. Anyway, he said that everyone's going to her purgatory. Hell, we're definitely not going to hell. Really?

Why? Like, really bad. Like murder is going to hell. Oh, yeah, no, I haven't done any of that. But basically, the options for us are purgatory or heaven. And you need to, we need to, I'm not joking. Pergatory is not for me. I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, incontory.

And I feel like that's what purgatory is. It's inconvenient. Like they give you those like tasks where like like the cube. The cube is my purgatory. Like you know the cube live? The cube experience live. That is pergatory. Why are you making me swap red and white balls into different boxes?

If I had to do that 24 seven. Purgatory is that escape from that people. It's the escape room. People pay to go to purgatory and I think you will need to get checked in their head. Oh, that is too funny. Planned fun. That's what pergatory is. I don't want to go there. Right, anyway, sorry, must move on. But basically, you're not crazy. Tell everyone he's a cousin shagger. And they shouldn't get with him because of that. And I hope they're very happy. And I hope they find somewhere that will marry them.

I agree. Spread vicious rumors. It's my advice here. Yes. That's all I've got to say. Okay, now time for an email. Okay. Hi, Ali and G. I spent nearly two years across my final year of uni and first year after graduating, a documentary about a band with a collaborator. Let's call him James. Wonder what the band was? I wonder. Hopefully someone big. Yeah.

If only we knew, then we could play their music underneath this. It started as our dissertation, but we always planned to take it to festivals. And we'd worked together successfully before, so I fully trusted him. Oh dear. The project exceeded all expectations, winning awards, getting into loads of festivals and building a great relationship with the band. This is brilliant. After things quietened, post-exempting. festival season, I tried to push for a release plan, but got a little response. Then I suddenly saw

the band promoting a screening at a major festival where one, I knew nothing about and two, where I was supposedly due to give a talk. Interesting. When James finally got in touch, he vaguely mentioned the band were tweaking the film, but kept me completely out of the process. A week before the festival, after I'd already spent money on the trip, he sent the updated version. It was basically a completely new documentary, re-shot and redone, and all of my work had been removed. The credits listed James and the band for everything, while I was reduced to additional audio, and my speaking slot had been given to him. Wow, that is so dark.

That's so dark. Six months later, I'm still furious, rightly so. I feel completely betrayed by someone I trusted, and although I've been told there's nothing I can do legally, I hate it when the lawyer say that, it's the worst. You go to them for help, and they come to you. With problems? With problems. I think I've paid you for you to tell me what I don't want to.

Totally agree. Totally agree. That is bollocks. There's nothing. Did you take a pill this? No. Are you coming up right now? Yeah.

It's really not my confidence. Sorry, this is not funny. What's happening to do about her life? Sorry, I tried to do that like a dramatization. Audio dramatization there. I really went mad to my drama school route. Really not my confidence. And I don't know whether to try and move on or keep fighting, what would you do?

Oh my God, this is so hard. Okay, go on. Well, this is, we're good people to talk to about this because, you know, we are. You're not. Dabbing your eye, like the whole thing's falling out. Well, if you snaked me like this. Well, this I was going to say, we're good people to talk to about this because we are legally married. And actually, we were talking about this the other day because we were talking about marriage

and about how we are more married to each other, publicly, financially, legally, than we will ever be really to an actual spouse. Yes. Fiance. If you will. Yeah. For real, though. Yeah.

And if you ever did anything like this to me. I would not stop fighting. Well. Would I? Eventually I would get over it. But I think it's important. I think it's important when you've been wronged to. to do everything you can so that you feel like, okay, well, I did everything that I could to prove that I was a part of this project once and you have fucked me over.

But then I think it has to come to a place where you have been told there's nothing you can do and you haven't got any kind of closure from him. That you then have to say, okay, I have to make my piece with it irrelevant of all of that because otherwise it's going to eat you up. Okay, I've got many things to say on this. Number one, we always say everyone in life is a lesson or a blessing. And this is clearly a great lesson, like a humongous lesson. I don't mean like a good lesson. But I guess it is a good lesson. Yeah, in the long run.

That number one, this is what I am so sorry to come back to this. You really cannot trust anyone. May I now say my Esther Perel quote? Sure. I think it's the perfect time. Hold that word. I wish I could Remember it

I keep coming back to this quote I can't remember it Did you write it down? Yes I'm so sorry This is going to be the biggest File of shit Sometimes we get like this

And we've had one of those weeks Like Al Yesterday I was opened A packet of bread And you just thought she did done a 40 minute stand up I was crying

all she did was open a packet of bread Right are you ready this is serious Okay trust is a confident engagement with the unknown

So all Is that it That's the quote That's a brilliant quote Is it? Yes Because we always talk about How you like

It's really hard to trust someone You can't trust someone And it's like All that you can do Are I still crying Wait I'm so sorry

something or something this is good we would do this we haven't had this for a love time we're grown women grow up FYI producers

are looking at us like we need to be sex yeah I'm thinking Imogen was right to write that hate comment this is absolutely this is unstructured this is giving unstructured we haven't even said anything funny

haven't even been funny I was trying to be serious about Estabrell quote. That was the shortest quote I've ever heard in my life. It doesn't need to be long to be good. Okay. Sorry. Why do you think that's a good quote? Because I just think you,

I think sometimes we can beat ourselves up for feeling like we went into something naively. And like I should have known, I should have known that I should have protect myself. And it's like the, like trust isn't real. Like it's literally a concept. Like you just confidently engage with the unknown. You don't know.

That's the whole point. But what I'm saying is maybe next, Like, like, yeah, next time, I'm sure. Well, next time, I just think there's a lesson and like maybe you don't have to learn a lesson like this extreme to know that no matter what, always take steps to protect yourself before you confidently engage in trusting someone. For example, legally, we couldn't, that would not play out with us because both of us are legally protected. And we own the IP together. Yeah. Yeah.

So, like, I couldn't, neither of us could just fuck the other one over like that and just get away with it because there would be. legal repercussions and like obviously what has happened is I'm like horrendous and it's it's also really you know you feel so robbed of like your creativity and your ideas and you feel like and your success yes because you're brilliance to be honest amen but there are basically this is a lesson and if you can try like almost even write them down write down all the things that you have learned from this experience that you now will not repeat again because if those are the silver linings that set you up like for good practice going forwards collaborating

making things with other people whatever whatever at least like at least it wasn't for nothing exactly and maybe it did happen for a reason because maybe had you not had that moment sliding doors 10 years down the line it would have been something much bigger and it would have had like financial loss and like do you know what I mean so maybe it happened for a reason and I think sometimes that is a nice thing to believe in.

Well, this is what the other thing I was going to say is that, like, I know right now it doesn't feel like, you can apply this to any situation in your life. Right now, it doesn't feel like it. And like, I, we even have this sometimes too, like, why didn't that work? Like, we probably won't know why for another 10 years. Yeah. But you have to really trust that there is a reason that this, also this is quite a forcible push back.

You know, like, I do sometimes think when that happens. the universe is really actively pushing someone out of the way. Like, this is not for you. There will be a reason. It might only appear to you in five, ten years. When you look back in hindsight, you'll be like, that is the best thing that never happened to me. Because this person is clearly not a good person.

Exactly. So thank God, to be honest, you dodged a bullet that. Like, you could apply that to a relationship, a boss, a job, a work project. Like, there are so many avenues that you can take that mentality and apply it to. And don't get me wrong, you need to, like, grieve it and feel absolutely angry and, like, fight it. But then there must come a point where you just think enough is enough. I have to make my peace with this and, like... Use it as fuel moving forward.

What's not meant for you will miss you. Yes. And clearly this was not meant for you. But in terms of, like, would I suggest that you continue fighting it? Yes. To a limit. To a point, exactly. Because, like, to be honest, if there's nothing you can do, there's nothing you can do.

And then like the fight becomes just actually like processing it yourself. Yeah. So that you can move on and do better work and bigger work. But also I'm really sorry that because like it's horrible. Yeah, awful. You feel so, but you feel like the rug has literally been pulled underneath your feet. For sure. For sure.

For sure. Right. It is time for the galley gossip. Gally gossip. Okay, this is where the galley's can message in, DM, comment with gossip. This is underline gossip. Love. So we have had a DM from Ali, not you. Don't worry.

A different Ali on Instagram with some major workplace gossip. Okay. Hey, a little galley gossip for you ladies. So I work with a married couple. Work currently. Where he is a team leader and she is on his team. Always dodgy that. Power dynamics at play.

I agree. Not good. They started out as an affair at work whilst they were both. previously married. They've now been married for over five years and have kids together and all. It has just come out that they are getting a divorce because the wife found inappropriate and sexual photos and videos on her husband phone of one of the students at work that were sent him from the...

Oh my God, that's bad. From one of the students at work that were sent him from the student, which has been going on for over six months. Also, just to clarify, everyone is over 18. The student is an internal student who has worked for the company for years but is upgrading to a degree for qualification in. our job. Wild, I know, but thought this would be some crazy gossip. That is crazy gossip. Also, can I say, happens too often in the workplace. What are they putting in the water?

It's because, listen, it's like being at school. I know. It's like fancying your IT teacher. It's not good. Yeah, because it's like they're not fit outside of work. But in work, for some reason, they're supercharged. That is so bad. Also, there is that thing of like proximity, sadly. Yes. And also, this is an awful thing to say, but like the way she went in is the way she's gone out. She was the product of her affair. Always says how they come is how they go. Karma is really nasty there. It's worked.

It's horrible magic because you are getting some comeuppance in a very horrible way. And clearly, everyone in the office knows about it. I just want to say, thank God you're you. Watching all this play out like a fucking TV show. Perfect. Perfect. I can only imagine the gossip, the tea that's flying around. Who needs Hulu?

Do you know what I mean? When you're in this workplace, That is brilliant galley gossip. Thank you so much. If you want to get involved in next week's galley gossip, please do send us a DM on Insta or drop us a comment on YouTube

or Spotify to be featured. Okay, this is quick fire. Sorry. One more. What we loved and didn't love from this episode. Loved me being hilarious, clearly.

Us having a full on nervous breakdown, actually. It's right, you know, for everyone to watch. Merrill Streep aging so well and so beautifully. Celebrity stylists that's lay. Yes. Devil Wes Prada two coming out. Can't wait.

Esther's quote. I don't know about Esther's quote if I want to be. I prefer why. I even said Estabwe because I was out of that. What's yours? Trust no one. Okay. It's a bit shorter.

So if your critique was that Estes was short, trust no one is three words, arguably two words. Okay. Things we did in love. Being too tall or too short, seems wrong to me. Not their fault, but a fault nonetheless. DPD, every relay. Do your job.

Next day delivery means next day, guys. Things we didn't love calling your fiancé, your fiancé. Speak for yourself. I'll be calling him, my fiancée. Shagging family members. Didn't love having a pubby granddad. Didn't love Ali making up that the grandad had cleanliness issues. Didn't love.

I didn't love that we're all going to purgatory. You're in this too, by the way. I don't know why you think you're getting off Scott free. I'm talking to Izzy now. Izzy, I actually think you could be going to hell. Exquis a me. So, exquisite me. No, sorry, that's wrong.

Ted Bundy's in hell. You're not as bad as Ted Bundy's Ted Bundy. You know, you can't compare serial dating to Ted Bundy's serial killing. It's not the same, is it? Like, sure, we share cereal. Fair. But, you know, that's where it stops. Fair.

Fair. I'm so sorry to have you. Yay. Okay. Let us know what you loved or hated in this app by commenting on Spotify, YouTube or wherever you are listening. If you've got a story or a dilemma that only we can help you with them, please send a voice note to our WhatsApp on 07342-61-7792 or you can click the link in the episode description. You can also, don't forget, if you're a writer not a speaker, send us an email at hello at leave a messagepod.com. Bye. Bye, guys. See you next week.