Leave A Message with Ally & G - Mother Nature Ruined Everything… And They're DIVORCING?!

Episode Date: July 1, 2026

It’s been a rough week for Ally and G in the bedroom, with Ally coming back from a wedding where a two-bed hotel room brutally stood in the way of things getting steamy with Ror. And if that wasn’t enough, G has been betrayed by Mother Nature herself, who decided date night was the perfect time for her period to make an appearance.PLUS, one Gally is caught up in a seriously complicated situation with her boss, while another is facing the challenge of holding her family together after her parents dropped the bombshell that they’re divorcing.FANCY SENDING A VOICENOTE/MESSAGE GALLY? Send your voice note to: https://wa.me/message/UH4DASEKPFQBA1 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(Oh, and don’t leave out ANY of the juicy details!)OR, you can write us email an on [e-mail] us at @leaveamessagepodcast on socials!Listen every Wednesday wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You've reached leave a message with me, Ali. And me, G. This is a podcast where we help the galleys in need. Whether you're still red raw from trying to get that date night glow. That sounds, sorry, this is not my line, but that sounds so sexual. You must get your mind out the gutter, actually. Red raw is about my sunburn. Yes, I know that.

I just want everyone else listening to know that. But it's not about other things. It's not about other, you know, anatomy. Or maybe it is. Or you found your one-night stand literally eating shit. I forgot about that. I actually genuinely forgot that happens. Babe, when I...

Flocked it from my mind. Number one, when I listened back to the episode, I just forgot how just quite how bad it was. Then I listened back and I thought, that man needs to be sections. Yeah, no, he's not well. And then someone asked me on the weekend, what's the craziest story you've ever had on the board?

So then you could go in with that one. Thank God. Thank God. Thank God. dinner, that's what I'm going to bring up. Thank God. Thank God. Anyway, if you like any of those things, this is the podcast for you. Hi.

Much to discuss this week. Much to discuss. I don't know where to start. Guys, do you not feel a bit like you're like living in a washing machine at the moment? I honestly don't know my head from my tail. My head from my toes. I don't know. You've gained a tail.

That's how flustered you are. You've now got a tail. My flat Oh God is like honestly You know when you live in your own mess Yeah Then one of Rawls

We talk about him quite a lot was Like rules like best friend from school Who lives in Australia is here And he's staying with us And I got home on Tuesday And he was like this flat I could honestly go on like on hoarders Did he say that?

And I was like Oh really because I think Your flat is wild Like I've never known two people have so much stuff. The thing is, it's not just us. Yes, your sister do. God bless.

I know. She's also a hoarder. And then you know when you sort of like the lights are turned on in the club and you look around and you think, fuck me. Yeah. And you think I've made some bad decisions here tonight. Yeah. And that's what happens on the daily review. Yes.

Yes. So Wals said there's a lot of stuff in here that doesn't need to be there. He said you could go up for the hoarders contest. I think I probably good. Yeah. The problem is I'm actually not a hoarder. I don't think I'm a hoarder. You're a hoarder.

I don't think I'm a hoarder. I think you're a hoarder. I think I just have a lot of stuff. But I don't keep things unnecessarily. I think you do. Guys, I can't tell you if anyone's after some kind of like, you know, booty kind of shopping experience, like all you need to do is open one of Al's wardrobes and there will be 50 to 60 items of clothing still with labels on that have never been worn and you think that's not hoarding. Guys, must shine a light She obviously has the key to my house Right, once I was away She needed something to wear out I believe she was actually going on a date I believe I was

She has sizes ranging from about 6 to 14 Yeah, obviously Like any which way You can fit in a clothes Like at Ali's house Do you know why? I love lending my stuff Yes, you do

I genuinely do Like I love to I've got all this stuff Someone might as well wear it You've got to speak to Maruta It by rotation about doing an edit I've told you this many times What do you do it?

Get out of your washing machine. Can I tell you the problem? And do that. Can I know the problem? What? By rotation, they only want posh stuff. You, babe. They want actual posh stuff.

They don't want... I don't think Ganny counts. Ganny's not posh anymore. Ganny counts. Ganny's posh. I can't... I always said it was like, fucking designer on designer. No, it wasn't all.

They were like rat and boa. Okay, there was one... I think of rat and boas in there, Gannies in there. Yeah, but then there was like a 16 Arlington, like some nice stuff. Yeah, lucky you if you relish to get all your hands on eye arm-based stuff. Sorry, I've got such a blurry eye. I have got such blurry eyes there. I can't see an effing.

I didn't even put contacts in because I thought sod it. I can't be asked. I'd rather not see than have something in my eye right now. It's so like, I think it's all the sun creams, all the La Roche-Crosse. All the creams, I know. I just put in my eye room. What are your updates, but? Well, we've both been away, guys. We've both been on our joles.

Can you see we're glowing, aren't we? We were glowing in that Maybelean picture last night. Amen. And it is, it's a rotation of things. I'll put it on our stories, three different products that I am covering myself in. Oh, my, I'm not, well, obviously, Baudillada. Body Bada Ladder, number one, obviously, Solda Giro. The Cocoa Palmer's stuff.

The Copari spray. The Copari spray and the Solda Gineiro. Body Badi Bada ladder? Oh no, the glow one. Yeah. Anyway, we're both in on. Marjoles. Yeah.

Guys, sorry, this is just like, I don't know if anyone can relate to this. I came off the pill in, when did I come off the pill in, like, December? Yeah. I have really, like, not had a period. I've had maybe like two periods since then, and I like just keep, like, skipping them, which I assume as normal. I keep doing pregnancy tests, even though so nowhere I could be pregnant. But I'm just like, surely I must be why I'm not bleeding.

Anyway, I've waited, I saw my flow up, 55 days on my period to come. When does it come? This morning. I've got a date tonight. I thought you couldn't write it, could you? That's the universe. Sorry, that is too weird. The universe trying to cock-block me.

Yeah. Why? Yeah. I deserve a shag. I do. Been in my washing machine. I deserve. What are you going to talk about last night?

No. Oh, well, we could talk about that as well. You go first. I don't. She deserves a shag, but I have, everyone had I went to a wedding, literally this weekend. Lovely, what I have.

nice little, you know, sexy a time. Did you think you were? Yeah, babe. Did you pack a little... No, but no need. Like, you know, nine years old. No, I always... She never packs a thing.

Guys, the main gripe that me and I'll have is me literally saying to her you've got to put a shift in. Come on, get your laundry on. I have got to put a shift in. I have to, because it's getting stupid now. You're getting lazy. I am the lazy-er. You're a lazy lover. There is no one who lazy-in-bedded me.

Yeah, I know. Don't I fucking know it? We love a giver. Anyway, so I think. thought this weekend's my chance. Open the fucking... Let me put some bells and whistles on, boys. I thought, oh, it's going to be lovely.

Open the fucking hotel room door, guys. We've got two beds. Okay, right. Is everyone with me that that is not a barrier to entry? That, you resigning yourself to two beds? Well, that's it done. Well, nothing can be done about that. It is what it is.

You get your bed and you stay in here. The fraudulent. I said, sir. I'm so sorry. This isn't quite what I had in mind. Shagging, one of the... the beds. I don't like that. I don't like it. Help me.

What do you? I don't like that. What do you mean? My bed is my bed. And your bed is your bed. So shag on his bed. What's your problem? It isn't... You going into... Sorry, me fighting Rawls Corner for him because he can't do it. You walking into home town and being like, well, no doggy for me. The fuck does that mean? Shag in the shower. Shag in anywhere else than the bed. Get on the floor. It's marble and cold, it's lovely. I don't understand the barrier.

I just saw that I thought, that's not going to be here, is it? It's not doing it for me. Saw that I thought, oh, well, that's it then. What's your fetish, like a king's size? That's what gets you going. I just don't like to just go straight in. Like, I need to cuddle, I need to,

because we weren't sleeping in the same bed, so then you wake up and then one of us has to get in the other. Sexy. I'm talking about it. Like, they were, like, guys, they were inches apart. Also, like, they're two, like, single-compan beds or something that no two people would film. Like, two people would film. Yeah.

Do you know what I mean? Like, no excuse. Anyway, on Sunday, I said to him, brother, because I said to Mel on Saturday, I said, I promise you, I will offer my services tomorrow. Very good. And I did. Your third base services. My third base services. Third bases.

Is that not what the kids say anymore? That is what the kids say. I will offer my third base services because, Tauracy, I genuinely do that three times a year. This was going to be an extra... A bonus episode. Special tuner. Anyway, I said, sir, my leash, would you like me to offer my third-based services?

I'll even come to your bed. I will make the long journey across this room to your bed. I was declined. Declined. I can't believe that. And I thought, do you know what? You silly, silly pricks. I will never.

offer that again. Do you how lucky you are? I offered that. Do you know how lucky you are? Once I'm a wife. Anyway, guys, I went away for a nice long romantic weekend. We didn't have six months. This is the thing about weddings.

I don't know why. Guys, I don't... Could you get so pissed? Like, so... Because it's free drinks. On another level. Yeah. Also, like, it's a bit, like, all a bit exciting and a bit hot and like sometimes boring.

And when you're bored... It wasn't boring if any of my friends are listening. I actually had the fucking most, like the funnest wedding. No, of course not, but the drink ceremony is always too long. Everyone knows that. The cocktail hour was, and we were, by then, by the time you sit down to dinner, your shit fixed. Exactly, that's what I'm saying.

And so then it's hard to perform. Guys, I learned recently that you don't actually really have to give third base. I didn't even know that. Like, I've been... How could you not know that? You literally spend your life with me and I still have a boyfriend. I literally thought, like, I'm on my first day. I'm obviously doing third base.

Right, you need to really look yourself in the mirror because I, do you know what I said it to me the other day? Was it Holes? Someone literally just said to me, you know, you don't have to give a blowjob. I said that. I literally said that. I was like, obviously I will fly the flag forever for not having to. I tell my friend this is, it's princess all the time.

I find it. I find it unsanitary. Yeah, I do. But I've also been in a six-year relationship. There we go. The only occasion when a blow job is acceptable. And I actually mean this from the bottom of my heart is if you're fresh out the shower.

Do you know what? Completely agree. Disgusting. It's really stinks of cheese. Like, oh my God. It's not a heat wave activity course. It's not heat wave. It's not come home from the office.

No. Don't walk your dog. Don't give a blow job. Don't give a blow job. Do you know what I mean in the heat wave? It's rank. It's rank. I genuinely don't mind it.

And I say the same. I don't even mind the jeep. I'm so sorry. I don't. I am not lactose intolerant. That's all you need to know, that way. Guys, if there are any, like, brown girls listening who are, like,

looking to advertise with this podcast, honestly, I had to skip past this. You know, I can do PG. I can do PGA. I can do PGA. I don't do that anymore. Famously, I now don't do that anymore because I didn't know that you didn't have to do that.

Babe, you said to me, you did doggy on the first date. That's fucked. Guys, back me up. Al literally looked at me like I was an alien when she was like, you know, because we were talking about, like, what's special occasion? God bless the cabbies.

in this city. No. The conversations they've heard from us. Thank you get for giving, like, right, get gift us credit every month. We're so lucky. So we get black cabs now.

Now we can't travel in any other way. Even if we don't have the get credit. We'll get a get. We're paying for black cabs because we just really love it. Anyway, the amount of times we have spoken about the most outrageous things

in the back of tactics and I think that's not right. I think they must have a file on us. I've always think all those black cabbies, they must have a WhatsApp group being like, have you had those two fucking batship crazy ladies. And I said to Al the other day

in the back of the black cab and I'm like, well, you know, what's like, because we were talking about this, like, lack of special occasion shagging. And I was like, you know, what, like, else could you do that, like, spices it up? And she's like, God, honestly, doggy. And I was like, by, blah, I would do do doggie. Without even thinking I would do doggy. But are you doing that because you're trying to be, like, you think it's nice.

It's just part of my, like, it's just part of my kind of like. But do you, but this is, I think this is where you're going on. Because giving a blowy on the first tape is clearly also part of your repertoire. And that's not really, I don't think you need to do that. I don't. But if someone went down on you, it's like, it's like, oh, thank you. I genuinely think that's too intimate for a first day.

I really do. I think, like, going down on me, you've got to know me like, and my trauma a bit. Do you know what I mean? You don't need to know any of my trauma to go down on me. Just saying.

You're saying. I think it's a bit much. Do you? I just think, I actually think that that is, I genuinely think third base is way more intimate than just saying. I know. Way more intimate. But why is your face down there?

Like just no need. That's how I know that though I like them maybe. And that we're compatible. Because they offer. Because I don't feel like it's too much. Is it in please offer your services? Always offer. I will happily decline.

Always nice to be invited. Always nice to be invited. Even if you don't go. Exactly. Right. Let's move this swiftly on, please. No, sorry. I actually just wanted to say this is boring chat.

But for the people, you know, for, you know, the people amongst us who were getting married. Yes. I am just here to fly the flag for a Friday wedding. Oh, yes. Because I think this is an important thing to talk about because everyone slags it off. It's cheaper and it's fucking slave because you get your Sunday back.

Yes. So what you need to know is that what the plan is is everyone travels on the Thursday night. This is if you're doing an abroad wedding. It doesn't really count for a London one. Or I guess it does if you're doing like an at-home wedding then still a Friday. Because then you still get your Sunday.

Everyone has to take that Friday off really. Unless it's a Saturday wedding, but normally people do a night before, so then if you're working, you have to travel to the wedding. No, but even if you do it on a Saturday, chances are you're going to have to take the Monday off. Because you're going to fly after work on Friday. Even if there's a night before. Saturday wedding, Sunday day too, you're going to fly back on. So either way, you're taking a day off. So Thursday, Thursday night. Just have the Friday off. Come home Sunday. It's heaven. Brilliant. Okay. Are you ready? This is the World Cup of X. You're not O'Fay with this beautiful chart that producer Izzy made. Please, become abreast. Last week, we battled it out between, right, so we're in the quarterfiners.

We skip the group stages, we skip the round of all of that bullshit before we skip that. Because it's very hard to understand that. It's literally the easiest thing. What? You get nil-nil, but you get a point. Make that make that make sense. It's literally a league. That means nothing to me. only thing I don't understand is why you would draw nil-nill and still both get a point. Stupid.

Last week, sitting in the bath and tries too hard on Instagram made it through to the semis. But who will make it through today? I'm going to be fighting on behalf of waving being the biggest ick. And I'm going to be representing long fingernails. I believe that hand gestures of any kind are icky. For example, yeah, icky. even if someone flips you off icky

flips you off isn't that what it's called like flips you off does that not what people say I thought this was flipping someone off flip them the bird flip them the bird

thank you Sadie flip them the bird flip you the bird in a minute like I would rather someone said to me oh piss off than went like this yeah agreed

that is so lame and imagine the moment you're walking towards your date, maybe you've been on a few dates, four or five dates. You know them quite well now. You're starting to like them. And then they look up from their phone screen,

look at you, and they just go like this. Oh, mouth open as well. That's terrible. It's mouth open because they're so excited to see you. This is my thing about waving. What are you so keen for? It's keen.

I don't like keen. Or it's like signaling. It's like, I can fucking see you. I've got eyes. I'm waving out. I can see you. I'm here. I know.

I'm looking like you. Also, can I tell you the worst thing is when you're like too, So like they're going to have to wait. No, when you picked a choice to wave. I've had that. Then they put their arm down and then it's like always a bit awkward because you've waved now so you can't get your phone back out and start scrolling.

Well, it's like, no, that's terrible. Actually, greeting people in general is so icky. I was thinking this. I hate greeting anyone. I was thinking this. It is like low-key embarrassing to greet anybody. Did I tell you the other day what happened with, I don't know what to call him, this guy. Let's call him.

him. Oh God. Arsenal. That's so obvious. He's a Premier League for all that. So obvious it's for Kai-Sahagha. Yeah. So obvious because I've been at all the games.

This guy, you know when you get to the stage where you've gone on a few dates and you don't, and you've broken the like sex barrier, you're like, are we kissing now? Like when we... No! Oh! That is awful. I went to kind of kiss him and then he went for a hug and I literally was like,

Okay, so if the ground could now open, swallowing me up, and I will just die here alone, that would be great. That is hell. Hell. And I thought about it for... Especially in a public place. Like, in your... You know, at home it's okay because you can kind of like,

no one's looking, but that is mortifying. I thought it was going to be sick. I even have that sometimes, like, with like people that you know or like friends or like acquaintances or like friends are friends that you kind of know. When they say love you and you think, oh my God, shit. I don't know what to say. I don't love you. Because I don't love you.

And then I just say, ha, ha, la ha, nothing to say. Love, love, lots of love. Peace and love, waving again. That is terrible. This is, whatever this is awful. This is worse. Worse than this. One at the same time, that's the worst.

Imagine someone did this at you. You'd be like, uh, why are you malfunctioning? Why is the matrix broken? I'm confused. Okay. I actually fucking hate long fingernails. Like, I don't even need to pretend. I find them disgusting.

It's unhygienic, it's unsanitary. Should we get a mirror? Hold on. Wait a second on men. Specifically on men. Long fingernails are four girls. I find it like I, like hyperfixate on that shit. I like raw's toenails, if they are a centimetre, like a millimeter too long.

A centimeter is quite a lot to do that. What I mean? It's disgusting. I find it unsanitary. And also it's a fucking health hazard. Boy's fingernails are like knives. If they cut you, if they scratch you, because there's nothing on them.

I always think, and they're so fucking strong. And they're not manicured, I suppose. Even worse, I'll tell you my absolute number one, hate dirt under the long fingernails. It makes my skin crawl. Like, this is why, like, I love to watch farmers. I can't be around farmers. They've got too much dirt onto their fingernails.

And manure. Gross. Also, I do think, you know, when you see people picking the dirt out of their fingernails, I think honestly, you, you were going to die first. In the apocalypse, you're the person that's going to die first. You are, you've got absolutely no sense of hygiene. I hate, hate, hate, hate long fingernails. I hate to be crude, but I suppose as well, if you're the, you know, fingering party, you probably shouldn't have long fingernails. Nah, that's not right. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. It's a health hazard. You can actually slice yourself up. open in the vaginal opening. Slice yourself open. Sorry. They can slice you open on your own vaginal opening. If they finger in the

wrong angle, the thing that I actually hate the most about it, okay, objectively long fingernails aren't like that bad. Objectively, I just want to preface that. Also define long. Like any white bit. I, any sign, like the first sign of a white nail is too long on a boy. Really? Because I do have a bit of a problem when you can see the skin above the nail. Oh yeah, that is also bad. That's no good. So, you know, quite a hard

balancing act to find there. But then it's like just no need to, what you need is a nail bit biteer that just bites just to the right amount. Yes. Oh, so you know your biting is a bit icky. If you're sat next to someone, they're biting their nails, we're not all you're anxious for. Sorry. anxiety is real but why are you not coping well do your tapping don't you get by it

I find it icky when Rawl cuts his fingernails I do I find it gross I find it disgusting and also right sorry you find it icky when he cuts his fingernails but you don't like him to have long nails he can't win

he quite literally can't win I understand that and he can't even get a shag what's the boy to do the problem is when they cut them like that the jagged edges I'm like fucking hell

could you not round it out like you don't file them okay How do you feel about a boy that you're dating? Going to, I don't know, absolute joy. To get a pedicure. Pedicure or manicure, staff. I would pay for him to do that.

Sat like this, getting their nails done. They're getting the clean cut girl. I would pay for them to do that. I would, honestly, that would, if he did that, he's getting him. I find, if only you knew how easy it really is. To be honest, it's the whole premise of like, I mean, I have an issue with feet in general. Yeah. I find feet really, honestly, vile.

but the long toenails for me are obviously worse than the long fingernails. But long fingernails for me do like, if I see a boy with long fingernails, I really, really can hyperfixate on that. Like also in Asia, it's like, it's like good luck for you to have your pinkie finger. And I do think that has set me off because some of these fingernails guys, they're out here. Yeah. It's not right.

Yeah. I think because you feel so passionate. about the fingernails, fingernails should win. I think waving should win. We had this last week. I think... Because I'm such a good debate.

Do you know I used to do debate club at school? I think it's really paid off. Do you know, I was saying... Someone commented it the other day, I would literally believe any... You're such good arguers that I would believe anything. You said, and I replied,

it's a shame we're so fucking stupid because we'd be great lawyers. Babe, have I ever told you the story of when I went to debate club? And I was doing euthanager. And I... No! Guys, the debate about...

The debate was about euthanasia and I did all of my notes about the euthanasia. High Bible, that is a true story because it hadn't been written down. It hadn't... It was verbal because it was debate club. So at the end of the club, they'd said,

oh, like, this group, you're going to be doing... We want you to vote in defraising. Like, pro-euthanasia. And I did remember, thinking like pro the youth in Asia like what that they're better than us that was my argument was that they were like a better youth set than us because we were all like degenerates like drinking young like do you know what I mean and that was kind of like oh I was going in before all these notes and then the cons went first and they started talking about people dying and I was like the fuck like

what are they why are they talking about people dying imagine how good your argument would have been if you'd actually done the right thing well I did think thank God Oh, I gave it a go. I stood up and I said, well, you know, if you've got to go, you've got to go. Do you know what I mean? If you're not ready to, if you don't want to be here anymore. Pull the plug. Pull the get out of here.

If you want to sleep forever, sleep forever. Sleep in beauty. Do you know what I mean? But it wasn't the most well-rounded argument I've ever given because, of course, I was prepared to debate the euthanasia, which I would have done very well. That's awful that. Right, so who wins? I think you can win. Really?

I really do. I think about it. Well, I suppose also it's something that, like, you wouldn't, like, long finger nails is kind of maybe obvious, whereas waving, like, once it gets you. No, no, once it gets you. And you can't unsee that. Fair. Okay.

Match two. Okay. I'm representing where's invisible socks. And I'll be fighting for eating an ice cream. To me, there is already a clear winner here. I would like to take quote from my brilliant co-host in last week's episode. There is no excuse for being a pussy. And Invisible socks are for pussies

because you don't want to wear no socks because you're scared of blisters. True. That's it. That's just facts. So either wear socks and own it or wear no socks. That's my opinion on it.

I think Invisible socks, ballet pumps for men, they are. They're thin ballet pumps basically. I wear invisible socks, though. Is that an ick? Right, got it. Are you mad? Okay, hold on, wait.

Wait. Wait. You're snogging, snogging, snogging. getting sensual. Remember this, babe, it's a long time a day for you. But you're not doing any more, you're straight in, shoes are on. Snogging, snogging, snogging. Kick your shoes off, you look down. No, no, that would put me off. And you've got a little kind of, a little kind of, what would you even call it? A condom on your foot. And you're going to shag like that. For me, I, I, for me, no. For me, no. Also, you can always see the outline of their toes in those socks.

they're always so thin. I think. It's so dainty. I quite like my men fan. But I do draw the line at ballerinas. And I think it's very ballet-esque. I think as a girl that does wear, I don't do it because maybe I do.

Sorry, okay. No, you do it because you're a pussy bitch and you're scared of blisters. That's why you do it. No, but I don't. Actually, that's not the reason. I do it because I don't want my fucking shoes to stink of feet.

And the soles do protect, yeah. So get a little Dr. Scholl spray or something. Fair. But I've got sweaty, I do have really sweaty feet. And I need the sock. Also, when you take the sock off at the end of the day, they're black. I think, how the fuck did that happen? Where are you walking?

I know. I know, it was in my trainer the whole day and it's black. I went to the gym yesterday, no socks. See, I find that gross, because your shoes must stink. They genuinely don't. I'll be the judge of that. That's such a pick-mey thing to say. My feet don't smell.

My feet actually don't buy fast as well. A lot of me smells, but my feet don't. Really? Yeah. My feet stink. I know. I genuinely know. I have smelly feet.

So I have to wear those socks. I don't like that feeling of like the... No, no, fan. It's not a nice feeling. The toe on the foot. It's not nice. I just feel like anything that's been invented, like post the millennium, like just should it actually exist.

I basically am a stand for invisible socks on women. And I'm sorry to be sexist about it. I am. I'm really sorry I don't prescribe to, you know, gender conformities, but it is in this instance necessary to keep those two separate things. Do you think? I don't think Invisible Sox. I don't think I like them on anyone personally.

Babe, you wear invisible socks. You are bollocks. Babes, when it's the last time? In Australia. Every day when we went to the gym, you wore those invisible socks. You did. You need help. I wore a millennial ankle sock.

Yes, I did. Let me get the picture. It was not an invisible sock. The invisible sock is down here so low. Okay. Are we talking about invisible sock? Are we talking about invisible sock? Ankle sock or invisible sock?

Okay. Please refer to the table for the World Cup of Hicks and to the script. It's invisible socks. It's not ankle socks. Goodness gracious, look at one working with. I need to take back everything I said. Ankle socks. Fine, obviously.

One's arguing about ankle socks. Invisible socks is a hard note. Do you, right, will we, for anyone else that is confused, like Al, please will we put a picture of what an invisible socket? It's the one that goes basically to the toe. It's not visible. Okay. In a shoe. It's invisible.

Fine. Got it? I'm anti that. Thank you. Okay. Eating an ice cream. Well, I, I, the issues with this are the amount of tongue action that has to fucking happen for you to actually nosh on an ice cream. cream. Like, it's far too much. No one needs to see that much of someone else's tongue.

Even in the bedroom, I don't need to fucking see that. I don't need to see it. I beg to do it. I need to see it. I need to feel it. I don't need to see you doing flips and tricks with your tongue. And I definitely don't need to see you licking up the side of a cone. It's the cone. That is awful. As soon as it gets to the cone, it's all gone too far. And what if? And also, When they do it so exaggerate, like it's not, you know, that is just awful. Or they put their whole mouth around the whole blob of ice cream. Have you ever seen anyone do that?

Yeah. Have you? Yeah. That's awful. That's awful, isn't it? Like, it's almost like a, like a sucking action from the top. It's kind of like a cover all bases and pull in is the action that I've witnessed. I do like that.

I don't like that. I don't like. What about dribble down the chin as well? Ice cream. they lick it, then there's some here, some here. Also, an ice cream choice can be quite icky. I think if I was on a like summer date with someone and they picked a twister, I'd be right off them.

Really? A twister. Okay, Flake is actually the only acceptable ice cream to get on a day or a magnum. Even a magnum, though, there's something quite icky about biting into an ice cream. A gelato is the only acceptable thing to get. Sorry, I didn't realize you've got quite so gentrify. Sorry, both of them. A gelatio.

You would rather someone took you to like an artisan... I would rather not eat an ice cream on a day. ...than a wall's pull-along thing. Oh, yeah. Where you had to get a magnum out. Also, magnums have got smaller. I like a mini-magnum. That's not icky to me.

I find that sweet. That's so pick me. You like a mini magnum. No, I don't... Not for me to watch someone out. I'm talking about to, objectively, to look at someone eating a mini magnum, I do not find defensive. But the big one tips you over the edge.

Yeah, because why... I like, gosh it. I hate the goshing. Oshing. Do you know, oh my God, guys, my cousin is like allergic. Like, when I say allergic, I mean, like, her body, like, physically repulses when she can hear people eating loudly. She did her mum. There's a word.

I can't remember what it's called. Disgusted. She's disgusted. She's clinically disgusted. She, well, she actually is clinically disgusted because my auntie did ancestry DNA, whatever it's called, 40, whatever it's called. 23rd. Yes, thank you. And it is a genetic.

thing that it is, it's a DNA that you can, it's a hereditary thing because her dad also has it, that Rehinton masks much better than her, that it's a gene that you actually can like, you can audibly hear louder than everyone else. Wow. That's why it's so disgusting to you because you can

hear it really loudly and it's genetic. Isn't that mad? So she would not want to be around an ice cream liquor? It's called misophonia. Misophonia. Thank you. Again, I have to think, I think that Invisible Sox win. I do too because now I'm on the right sock.

Yes, now you know what we're bloody talking about. I think invisible socks is terrible. I think it's terrible. And also I think like you have to let people have their joy. And ice cream is joy. There's no joy in invisible socks. What are you getting joy from that from? Okay, if you went on a date with someone and you did go for gelato,

what flavour could they pick that would put you off? A sorbet. I was going to say the same. If they picked a sorbet, I'd be like, and that is me on my way home. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Especially if they went like really fruity.

Also, you know. Oh, I know. Bubble gum. Bubble gum ice cream, the bright blue one. Imagine their tongue's blue and they try and snoggy. No, that's part. I think that about those drinks. Oh my God.

If someone got a Lukaseid out in front of me a blue lucasade, I would have to have a moment to myself. No, but I know. Okay. So next week, we are through to the semi-finals. So head to head will be. Tries too hard on Instagram and wears invisible socks. And sitting in the bath and waiting.

We'll go head to head to see which two will make it to the final of the world's biggest ick. Join us in part two for your galley messages. Okay, galleys, welcome back. Okay, let's hear our first voice note. Hey, galleys. We love you so much and we need some serious help. God, do we have a story for you? For context, we're currently doing an internship in Argentina and it's not really a normal situation.

A lot of our socialising happens in Nights South. with the people that we work with. So on my first night here, after 20 hours on the plane, I went to the bar with my new colleagues and obviously got outrageously drunk to celebrate and also fight the jet lag. But I ended up meeting this guy and kissing him, but it turns out he was my boss.

So he came back to my hotel, and now this has been happening regularly for well over a month. Oh, dear. We had heard some weird rumours about him having a girlfriend, but every time we asked him about it, he completely denied it. Then this morning, I woke up to a voice note from a friend of ours saying he just wanted to let me know, but this boy actually does have a girlfriend and that they were planning

to get married in the foreseeable future. He's now apparently told the girlfriend that he kissed another girl, but she doesn't know anything else. And he said, I knew about her, but didn't care. But I obviously did care as I've asked him about this on three separate occasions, and he's denied it every single time. please help me because I have to see him every day at work for the next three months. What do I do?

We love you girls. Bye. Oh, dear. Well, that is taking, doing it for the plot to a whole new level. Shagging your boss. Sorry, may I just say, abuse of power. He is not in the position to be shagging his employees. How would he have known?

In the beginning. He carried on, I think, though. Yeah, but so did she. I think the problem is you're both guilty here. I do think that. I don't know. I think sometimes when you're the boss, you've got to say, no, no, no, I shouldn't be doing that with my young intern. But it depends how much, is he much older?

Honestly, have a two-month age gap. But HR won't like it either way. And it's not illegal, but it is an advice. I think it's an advice, like, even if he wasn't your boss. True. Like, I really, really think. Don't dip your pen in the office thing. It's always, I've never heard one success story.

I know a success story. Wait, I know one actually. I do. My friend's sister slept with her boss. They are now engaged to be married. And he had to leave the company though. He left. Well, she did.

Someone left. Is that abuse of power? That is abuse of power. Yes, in the beginning, abuse of power. Of course it is. I have a friend who met her now husband. But they weren't in the same team and he was not any more senior than her. That's fine.

It's fine. But it is like in the beginning, it's not ideal. No, it's not. And you also kind of have to pretend that it's not a thing. Yeah, yeah. You have to pretend. And it's not great. Okay.

In this situation, this is even worse because he also has a girlfriend that he's going to marry. So obviously that's considerably worse than just shagging your boss. There's one thing for it, isn't there? You've got to stop. You've got to say to him, I'm not doing this. I'm not going to be complicit in your adultery. The problem is...

What is the problem? The problem is he might come back and say, like, this is the fucking problem though with all these adulterous men they string you along he might say something like like me and my girlfriend aren't good and la la la la la. We're gonna break up

la la la la but I just think bollocks like until you see that happen then it's not for you so say fine and I'll you know revisit our night time rendezvous when you no longer have a girlfriend cool see you there I've got Argentina to explore

there are sexy people there on Argentina I was going to say the other thing that you need to really remember is that he's one man in the whole of Argentina and you shagged him 20 hours off the plane. Like, you don't know what's out there. You didn't even look around. You honestly didn't even fucking turn left in the shopping market. Do what I mean?

Be a tourist. You picked up the first thing you saw. And you should never do that at a market. Never, never. Never. Never. Never. Not at the right price.

No. Never, never at the first price. So I think, yeah, sadly in this situation, you need to lay some boundaries. Yes. And you need to say, the problem is, it is, it is. this is why it's difficult because you're going to say that and then you're going to go to the office and you're going to see him.

Yeah, and you obviously fancy him and he fancies you and he's probably a bit flirty and it's hard to do but I do think just you know, sometimes you have to abstain from things that you enjoy. And that is just the nature of life. And also at work if you can like busy yourself, like if he walks in go for a week like even for the first week or so

like make sure you go out of your way to get out of his way. Devil's advocate. just for fun. At least it's only three months. So if you wanted to behave really badly and toxicly for three months, Sellevi. Sellevie, you'll be on the plane in no time.

We won't judge you. Exactly. Okay. Now it's time for an email. Are you ready, babe? I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready.

I'm a big fan of the pod and a long time drive-thru watcher. Thank you, Queen. I'm writing in because my parents have recently told me and my siblings that they're getting divorced. For context, I'm 17 and my siblings are 14 and 11. Oh, I feel so sad. Poor Al, she's going to go right back to herself. I think the thing I'm struggling with most is this overwhelming need to protect my younger siblings from being upset, especially because I'm leaving for uni soon and won't be around

as much. I feel weirdly responsible for making sure they're okay, even though I can't control everything. I'm also finding it really hard to process the fact that my dad is going to to be living in a completely different house now, which just feels so strange to even think about. And on top of that, the idea of either of my parents eventually remarrying genuinely makes me feel physically sick.

I promise I don't want them to be alone forever. I'm not evil. I guess I'd especially love to hear from Ali as someone who's experienced divorce as a child, but really just any advice on how to deal with all of this would mean a lot. Thanks, Devers. Oh, my God.

Wow. So hard. Okay. You were a bit younger than 11, well. I was much younger. I was seven and my sister was three, four. Yeah. Wow, I could say there is so much that I could say to you.

Number one, and I also, like, obviously my sister is younger than me. I think that the feeling, especially, I actually think it's arguably harder when you're 17 and you know every, like I was quite blind. I think it's really difficult when you are at that age. as well when your parents feel like they can talk to you about it. And it's like, I don't need to know anything, guys. This is your shit. Obviously, you feel protective and obviously you feel really, like, defensive and of making sure that they're okay.

The only thing that I can say that you can do is just shower them in love. And, like, guys, you and your siblings will be, like, this unit that is so strong. And if you just, like, cling to each other and protect each other. each other and like it's really I'm going to be honest this is going to be fucking difficult like there's going to be some really difficult days and there are going to be you're like grieving the loss of your parents and your family and like the household that you live in and there are so many emotions and you've got to walk through every single one of them and I think like actually the worst thing that you can do

is kind of try and pretend like everything's okay especially for your siblings because they're going to want to cry and they're going to want to feel all the feelings. And like, honestly, all you guys need to do is just sit in those feelings as and when they come. Like, let them, let them wash over you, talk about it till, like, it's, you know, six in the morning, like, talk and talk and talk and hate your parents and hate them. But, like, as long as you guys have each other, you will be okay. Like, I just really want to stress.

I know that lots and lots of people, like, when they're just at the beginning of it, especially when your parents first tell you, you're like, oh, right, my whole life is going to end. Yeah, and nothing's going to be the same again. Ever. You know, I can only say this because I'm many, many, many, 20, 5 years on, your life will be better and bigger and more beautiful because, like, no matter what, this is not the end of anything. If anything, it's the beginning of like another chapter.

And just know that if your parents have come to that decision, it is because they believe that it is better for them and arguably for you, for them not to be together anymore. And like, that's a really painful thing to swallow. But I can promise you as someone on the other side. I have had so many blessings. Like,

I have two amazing step parents who I would never have had. Both of my parents are happier. Like, there is just so much good that has come out of it. And my sister and I are like closer than never because we went through all of that together. And if you can kind of just take every day as it comes, try not to catastrophize. I know that's really much easier said than done.

Like try really hard not to think worst case scenario. Just look at the facts. Literally. And also like don't worry about your parents getting remarried just yet. That's very, very far down the line. Many, many months years. Yeah. Like just focus on what is happening today, tomorrow.

Yeah. You know, like, really, genuinely, step by step, talk about it till, like, kingdom come. Hold on to your siblings, forgive each other for, like, you know, acting out or whatever it is and, like, lean on each other. Also, no one will understand what you're going through, like, the two of them. Exactly. And, like, you know, I know you want to protect them, but, like, they are also there for you.

You know, like, it's a two-way street. You don't have to be the shelter for everything. You can, like, shelter them from somewhere. But, like, lean on them and talk about it. I also think just from witnessing, like, two of my closest friends, like Alan Halls are both older siblings and are both have divorced parents. And I think you also have to remember that it's not solely your responsibility because I think like, I think sometimes when that's happening and you're watching your, especially your mum normally, go through a lot of her own pain, you think, well, no worries. I'll look after the kids. Do you know what I mean?

Like, I'll be the mother. Whereas actually, like, she still has that responsibility for your younger siblings. And you shouldn't feel guilty for going to uni and for, you know, carrying on with your life and for maybe leaving them in a bit more of a tricky situation because they're younger. Of course, that's like really difficult to do. But your mum will also find purpose in having to look after and to care for and to prioritise your younger siblings. And I think oldest daughters do a lot of the time take weight that actually. they could hand back over. And I think if you can, like, trust that your mum can do that.

Well, also, like, I think it is a conversation of, like, you can say to your mum. Like, I feel really guilty, but, like, I know I'm going to go and I know I should go. And obviously, she's going to be, like, obviously go. Yeah. Don't worry. I'm still here. Like, I'm not dead. So then you feel reassured.

But, like, there is so much, again, like, I do think going through this brings you so close to your parents, especially your mom. it depends like if that's where you stay. But, you know, there's so many conversations that people have in this period with their family like on both sides.

Also, if your parents are amicable, it is considerably easier because, and also, you, by the way, you can say to your parents, if your one parent starts talking to you about the other one, absolutely say, guys, I'm not doing this.

I'm not going to be the middle man. I'm not going to have this conversation. This is between you. And I'm going to respond to each of you as my parents. Like that is genuinely it. Like I'm not your friend. I'm not here to talk about the fucking intricacies. Like there are so many boundaries.

Because I have friends that went through it like kind of at your age. And I know that that's the thing that is difficult is that your parents then think that they can talk to you like they're your friend. And it's like, I'm still your daughter. Yeah. You don't get to slag off my dad to me, whatever it is. So it is fucking hard. And like I wish I could just like give you a hug. tell you that it's going to be okay.

And fast forward like 10 years to when you're looking back. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Really, you will be okay. And like, you know, it'll be rocky for a while. And your siblings, you're all just really pulled together. I do think like these moments, they make you like really count, like lean on each other.

And I'm sending you so much love and I really, really, I hope it will be okay. I know it will be okay. I know it will. And listen, step-parents are like, honestly, if you get good ones, they are the greatest blessing. You get extra people in your life. Exactly. You know, who love you and care about you.

And also, guys, when I was younger, if you can, like, spin it, like, two sets of Christmas presents. Come on. Two sets of birthday presents. Two bedrooms to decorate. Yeah. A few guilt presents in there. And also cash in on that, like, amp it up.

Yeah, yeah. You know, like, please. Find your silver lining where you can. Yeah. Yeah. Love you. Love you, babe. Okay, it is now time for

The Galley Gossip. It's time for the Galley Gossip. This is where you can write in on email, on DM, in the WhatsApp. We will respond, obviously, on the Galley Gossip, but it's underlined gossip, stupid shit. Yes, please.

Okay, we've had a WhatsApp from a Galley who was curious about birthday etiquette. Good question. I love this shit. Hey, Ali and G, we have an interesting topic We'd love to get your ops on. Hey, I love that. Ops. Ops.

My best friend and I were chatting because it's one of our mutual friends' birthdays soon. And we got into a discussion about whether birthday presies are expected after a certain aid, especially if there's no specific gathering involved. Secondly, our issue is that this friend has specifically asked both of us for individual presents. Whoa, diva. Do you think a shared present is okay? We also wanted your general views on birthdays and presies and whether it is a bit out of line for this, we've asked directly both of us to get her a gift.

Yeah, I think that's so cheeky to give your friends like a list if they haven't asked. Right. Only if you asked, like if you said, what do you want for your birthday, then I will give you items because I'd rather you spend your money on things I want. Like I don't actually mind. But only if you've asked. If you haven't asked, I'm not going to send you a birthday looks like your father Christmas. What the hell? That's wild.

Right. Number one. Okay, the number one question is, are presents expected after a certain age, especially if there's no. specific gathering involved. Immo, no. No. Like, definitely no. Presence definitely dwindle.

I only really do presents now with like the ride or dies. Me too. Or if I'm going to a party. And even then it's a bottle of something. It's not all its flowers in the post. It's not like... I would do birthday presents for genuinely five people in my life. Yeah.

And definitely love a joint presi. Love. Love. More money. Yeah, I think you can't be asking. No, I would say to the very... I think that's one. I would pick one of the things she asked for and I would buy it together.

Agree. And that's it. Agreed. I agree. What's she going to say? Not enough. Do you not make my other present. I'm like, you're a sport bitch.

I'm not my friend anymore. Goodbye. Bye. Guys, producer Izzy from her halls has sent us a surprise voice note to help with this dilemma. Hello, LNG. It's William Henson here from Help I Sex with my boss and also I'm an etiquette coach. This is an interesting one. I would say if you can't afford or you don't want to give a present, you should be under no obligation to do that.

However, your friend has sort of indicated that it is a present as expected. We can unpick that one another time. A shared present is absolutely fine. People should be grateful for anything that they are given. And obviously, if it is going to be a shared present, there's going to be a slightly bigger budget. But yes, as adults, we don't generally go in for presents. You might give your best friend something, your loved one, family members' presents. But really once you've passed the age of 21, unless it is a birthday that ends with a zero, there should be no expectation for a present.

And as with any present that you receive, you then send a thank you letter. Brilliant. Wow. William, that was brilliant. No further comments. I will just say the zero thing I didn't even think of. Yeah, yeah, the zeros you've got to give. Brilliant.

But like not even, like only if you're invited. Loved ones. Yeah. Nearest and dearest. Like, if I'm going to a 30th, I'm just trying to think if I've been to a 30th. I would do a presi for a 30th. But I haven't been invited to anything.

And if you've got no friends, no presents to buy. Like, guys, my main life hack is get less friends. Amen. Thank you, William. That was brilliant. If you want to get involved in next week's galley gossip, send us a DM on Insta or drop us a comment on YouTube or Spotify to be featured. If you've got a story or dilemma that only we can help you with,

then please send a voice note to our WhatsApp on 07342-61797992. Or you can click the link in the episode description and it will take you straight there. You can also send us an email at hello at leaveamessagepod.com. Bye! See you next week!