Leave A Message with Ally & G - Virginity Advice, A Helping Hand (Job) And Nerds Are Cool??

Episode Date: February 11, 2026

This week on LAM with Ally and G, nothing is off limits. Are boyfriends just pets with opinions? Are nerds cool now? And who looked at a baby and thought, “Yes. Whimsy Lou.”Plus, we’ve got an email from a GUY whose bestie’s boyfriend might be hitting on him, and one Gally asking for advice on being a virgin at uni.FANCY SENDING A VOICENOTE/MESSAGE GALLY? Send your voice note to: https://wa.me/message/UH4DASEKPFQBA1 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(Oh, and don’t leave out ANY of the juicy details!)OR, you can write us email an on [e-mail] us at @leaveamessagepodcast on socials!Listen every Wednesday wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ali and G will be spilling all the drama on Leave a Message in just a moment. If you're here for the chaotic energy, there's more of that on The Jack and Ash Show. They're covering all the important stuff this week from Mixmatosis to heated rivalry and which one of the tweenies they fancy the most. All bases covered there. Follow the Jack and Ash Show now and get this week's episode on after Leave a Message. Do you want to saw it? No, Ali. Hello! My name's not Ali.

Hello, you have reached. Leave a message with me, Ali. And me, G. This is a podcast where we help the galleys in need. Whether you've been unexpectedly recruited for a threesome by a complete stranger. Or you can't get over how weird shagging actually is. I know. I've thought about that a lot.

Well, it's because you've been having a good time. I've been exploring my partner. Yeah. How was that? There's not much, to be fair. There was not much to exploration. No, babe, there is. I was thinking this.

Holes and I were talking with some friends that technically should know. Yeah. That technically should know. Well, actually, even Holes was talking to Mav about it. They were like, Marv said to Holes, do you think you could name every one of G's tattoos? And Holes was like, no. Bearing in mind, this girl sees me naked.

Oh my God, I know what you're going to say. 24-7. I know what you're going to say. Someone that should know that Holly has a tattoo didn't know. He was like, you've got a tattoo? Crazy. Because, you know, they've seen each other naked. And I was thinking about it.

And I was like, much to explore. Like, I don't know. I wouldn't know every nook and cranny of your body. I've seen me naked for many years, many days in a row. Boy, Paya and I often have this conversation. Yeah. I don't know why. This is quite morbid.

But basically, if you were... Had to identify the body. Yeah, but you couldn't see their face. Would you be able to do that? It was neck down. Because you've both got not much ink. I... It's not even...

even that. Like, you need to, his feet are fugly, so I would recognise those of my life. But if he had no feet, no head. You wouldn't? It would be difficult. That's what I'm saying, much to explore. His hands, maybe I would know. Like, if we cut him up.

No, no, I agree. And we just handed you, for example, his bum. Like, would you actually pick his bum out in a line up? I could pick it out. In a line up? His bum is probably one thing that I could pick out, yeah. Because you've got to touch it because it's rock on it. Well, also, it's rock hard, yeah.

And also, like, I just do a little bit of like a this test. on it and I would know. Also, he's got one mole on his left bum cheek. You would know that? I would know that. Because I look at him every day naked. No, I know, but that is quite amazing when you think about it because I'm like, technically I could do it, but I'm sure I'd miss bits. I'm sure I would. So, yeah, I think I would be able to do it for him. He's got a birthmark on his left knee. I would, obviously, you'd be really easy. But like, even if I saw your trot. Cut the tats off. If I cut the tats off. Well, this is what I always think, you know, and they say no face, no case. So I'm like, well, there is a case with me.

If you had no time of your feet, I would recognize your feet a fucking mile off. I really have a thing about not like not in a good way. I noticed people's feet. Like I would look at if I, I don't know, you know when you go to a beach and like people's feet are out, I always look at people. I would never. I would always look at like the ratio of their toes. Like also because rule like you and rule have really similar fee. Because we're Norwegian descent.

Because they're, I always say this. If we did ancestry DNA, Roe, would definitely share like a great, great, great, great grandfather. 1,000% they have a common ancestor. But it's so funny because Roar actually is Norwegian. I'm not sure I am. But you don't know that. It could just be distant.

No, because my nan got obsessed with ancestry for a while. I'm sure we're just like scouse, scouse, scouse and scouse. No, scouse, scouse, scouts, on the other side, you don't know that. You don't know that. I'm Gloucester on the other side and we don't move. Five-mile radius was all it was. I don't know. I'm not very detail-oriented as well.

I've realised. You can fucking say that. Don't really like sweat the small stuff. No, no. She doesn't pay attention to anything. I really don't. No, no. Like it is phenomenal.

What a beautiful way to live life. Yeah, yeah. It's so nice. I know. It's mad. And you just like don't notice anything. I know. It's mad.

I literally don't notice the thing. That's why she doesn't know people's names. I know. I think like if you, you did one of those, do you remember that game they used to play with you? Like, oh no, what have I forgotten. No, the other day I asked you what that girl's name was. Who?

You were like, monada, Monica, it's basically Monica. I was like, is Monica with a date? Her name is K. No, it's not. I found one is to, that. Is it? Yeah. Nah, I don't think that's right.

Maybe she's got another name that she gives out. Because she didn't give out, I'd have remembered Kibb. Hello? Who's that? This is the ad on the... beginning of the ballroom. Listening to yourself, are you? Pet insurance.

Listening to your favourite part. Sorry, what were you going to say that I interrupted you? Can't remember. Oh yeah, you know that game in like primary school where they'd have like a tray of objects and then they'd, you'd get like however long to look at the tray of objects then they put a tea towel over the top.

I was so good at that. I wouldn't be able to do that now. Like if you're blind following me now and you said describe this room, I'd be at a loss. Babe, shut up. I think I would. I think I was. You know the memory.

hard game where you have to remember where the memory. Yeah. Are you good at that? Probably not. I haven't played it in a while. You need to get good at that. That's how you're going to stop yourself getting Alzheimer's. I just think bring on the Alzheimer's.

I know I'm going to have it. I know I'm one of those. Bring on the Alzheimer's. Early on set, I just know it will be. I thought, babe, you're in it. Early on set is happening now. Got it now. That's the problem.

It's awful. Other than the fact that you can't remember fucking anything. Yeah. Well, like other than the fact that you can't stop shagging like a rabbit. That is a real exaggeration there. I've had sex twice. In a week. And that for me, that'll be me done for Fembe now.

No, Al literally said to me, she was like, no, twice in a weekend's too much. I was like, babe, sorry. I don't think it is. For me, babe, twice. This is my problem. I have this where like I just honestly could go weeks, months to be honest. And then it's back to back to back. Do you remember for the half time?

It was no start. But we should. I would never forget this. Morning, Nean and night. No, it was three days in a row and I was honestly having an identity crisis. You were like, I don't really know who I am anymore. So then I changed my sheets and I was like, right, that's that then. I can't do that. Off to the convent for me.

All right. That is quite enough sloshing around. I have that. Mine is not regular. Mine comes in like bursts. I don't know what that is. I don't know either. Anyway, yeah, everyone I went on a romantic.

Did everyone ask if you got engaged that? Babe. My sister. Your sister. My sister. As if she wouldn't know and you just put in your story and say nothing. She goes, how's Clifton? I was like thinking she was just asking first question, no ring, three question marks.

I said, no ring, sis. No ring. You'll all know when there's a ring. You'll know. Don't worry about it, you'll know. We're going on holiday end of April, okay. Mark your calendars. Set your alarms.

We've all told her off about her nails but she's not listening, not paying any attention. I'd be guessed if I got engaged with these nails. I think, lol, everyone would think, She didn't know. When you did know. I knew exactly what you were doing. I just think it needs to be his name in letters on the nails. Like, or like a, like, you should have barb.

Like, you should do something fun. Like, why is everyone so serious with the French tier? Well, on my wedding day, I will definitely, I'm not joking. I will have a little R on my ring finger. Good. Like, obviously. So will I on your wedding day. I saw this mean.

I'll have an R and an half. A. Slay. Slay. I saw this meme that was like, I don't understand. It was like obviously a girl filming her best friend's boyfriend. It was like, I don't understand how you could ever fancy your best friend's boyfriend. Like, to me, he's just like a pet.

It's exactly that. Yeah, it's exactly that. I was having this conversation the other day because, oh my God, is anyone watching Tell Me Lies? No, not yet. I've got so, there's so too much TV. We can't even, I can't even leave the house without like, worrying that I'm missing. Missing something. I know.

Or like something. Like, I'm loving it. I think it's so good. Well, anyway, tell me lies is like about American college kids making really bad decisions. It's brilliant. But basically, like, there's a lot of like crossing over and like some quite serious, you know, friends sleeping with friends' boyfriends. And I was talking to holes about it and I was like, I couldn't even force myself to find them attractive.

They're just not in that lie ever. Ever. I wouldn't even be able to, genuinely. Do you what I mean? Like, I couldn't even. I'm trying to think of someone Think of one you fancied Come on

I don't have one There's not one I couldn't stretch to one Not that they're not like Good looking Objectively good looking That's what I mean Sure but like

Not for me A pet Exactly a pet That I pick up and play with When I'm bored Yeah And that I boss about And then I leave

Yeah It's like a borrow my dogie Yes Yeah it is Yeah So it's like And they're like Do all your shit

Like rule will go and like hang her mirror and then he'll just leave. I need to text him about that. I've got three prints him to put on the wall actually. You best. You best tell him. Right. I tell you what we need to do.

Get to Apple Podcasts. Ask the galleys. Well, this is easy idea. Why don't you intro what you want us to do here, sis? Is it your captain of Apple Podcasts? Yeah. Amazing. And interaction with.

Absolutely. So I went on there and we've had no comments reviews for our new release yet. And I think we need some. so I think we should all write a little comment. Oh my God, you're right seven months ago. I know. I was like, guys, come on, please. The good news is, guys, we've got 212, 12, 5 star ratings.

It's not been one, four, oh wait, there has been one four star. Who are you? I will find you, I'll hug you down. Who are you? What did we drop a star for? Better was my mum when we swear too much. Punishing us. Let's read some of the old reviews so we can give you some inspo.

Let's just make our heads a little bigger. Oh, wait. We can, okay, let's do that. we can write our own review. I'm being deeply fucking narcissistic, but okay. No, I can't wait to write my own review. I'm going to write something so slay. Tap to rate, five. I'm just going to keep tapping to Ray. How many like... You can't, you can just keep tapping, tapping, tapping. Oh, tap to rate. Oh my God, well, I've got my new pastime. Double screening. No worries. Tap to rate.

Right. Okay, let me read to me. The funniest. Sorry, this is so funny. I must just read this again. We were lolling about this before. I live by Ali and Gue. They are so unintentionally funny. And they talk so openly and gives them great advice. Or as they'd say, opinions. Number one, we're not unintentionally funny. It's deeply intentional. We're so intentional with our humour. Like, I've never tried more at something in my life than to be funny. Do you know, sometimes I even try and write a funny message and I'll have to rewrite it three four times and I'll think, fuck, you know, this can't be right. Comedian, Josh Whitacom's not doing that. It rolls off the tongue for Josh Whitacom. I don't want to, sorry, this is a side note,

but I saw this TikTok about how some podcasts, obviously not ours. They're now so successful but the co-hosts kind of hate each other. Who? Who's the law? Well, this was the breadcrumbs and there was no names being dropped. But in the comment section, every single comment was parenting hell, parenting hell, parenting hell, parenting hell. I feel like they love each other. I think they're quite agy with each other, but guys, I just think they're knackered.

Well, also, they are aggy, like, as people. Like, isn't that kind of what they all get off on? Like, even Ramesh, they're all aggie. Isn't that the vibe? Like, remission and his mom low-key hate each other, but they're fucking hilarious. Yeah. Anyway, just want to say that. By the bye. The funniest most gorgeous girls. Thanks.

Say that one again. Oh my God, this is a good one. I'm going to start writing. This podcast is so good. The Big Sisters You Never New. Oh my God, this person's name is Purple Lemonade. This podcast is so good. The Big Sisters you never knew you needed so badly.

True. No, topics are off a limit. True. Two gorgeous girls inside out. True. Lovely company. True. I love listening and watching and would absolutely recommend.

men just 1,000 out of 10. Yeah, this is, someone just copy and paste this. A pleasure to see how far these guys have come. True. Right, title, my fave podcast. Explanation mark. Is it going to come up with G4s? Nicknamed Reedy G.

Yeah, I think people will know. I best do one too then. I'm just going in hard because why not? Title, my nickname Ali McIntosh. Can you edit that? Oh, you can change it, says. No, no. Have that let them know.

Should I change my nickname, Peggett for the plot? That might get banned on Apple Podcasts. Right, review. Title, okay, well, you go first. Oh, my God, why? Whenever I'm having a bad day. I listen to myself. I pop these two legends on and feel immediately better.

Really good. They are building. An empire. Such a strong community. Okay, two different routes there. Of baddies. Yes, corporate baddies unite. Love this.

So much, Slay. So that's what you need to do for us. It's that easy, guys. How long did that take me? Two seconds. So, you know, when you're at home and you're watching, you know, Love Island All Stars or whatever you're into at the moment,

just do a bit of that at the same time, bit of admin, a bit of review admin for us. Yes. Say it's so nice. have a podcast where the co-hosts actually like each other. I don't know. I don't know. Say that we're amazing.

Say that Izzy's amazing. And then we'll all, you know, be more successful. Issy, would you like to share your updates from your escapades last night or is that no, nowhere? I can, I can girlfriend, please. Okay, for ease, I shall call in my ex. I had a call with him yesterday for two hours. It was sparky.

I can't lie. I was ready for a fight and it just turned into it. I just have a question. It just out of the blue, nowhere he just called you. No, this was, this has been. attempted to sort of happen for three weeks now. It's been a diary and vibe. Yeah, it's been in the calendar.

It keeps getting moved around and I said, it's time. And he said, you know, I'm free too. I'm just jimming at the moment, but I shall call you. And he did late night, did you? Jimmy. Right, so there is a, there is a time difference. There is a time difference. I know, but why?

Like, that's not a good conducive environment. No, no, I think I'm just jimming in a mid. He pumped? Yeah, he pumped and then. Yeah, he needed a pump on. He needed to pump. Ops. He needed to pump.

did some testosterone flooding around the body. Yeah. Yeah. And then we had a very nice call and I was like, this is amazing. We're back to where we were and then the call ended really dramatically. And weirdly. Yeah, it was literally like this. Girlfriend in the background and then hung up. So he's basically saying, oh my God, my girlfriend's walked in.

And I'm on phone to my ex. I'm hoping it was, are you on the phone to your girlfriend? Really good. Oh. I think there's two angles you can do here. You can do positive. No, no, I agree. Let's explore both. Do you know if he's single? Oh, he's so single.

Fine. So, well, that's what he's telling me. But he is. I mean, he's, okay, for context he works on a boat. Would you get back with him? For context, would you get back with him? Hypothetically. Yes.

So why would he break up? Because he works on a boat? Yeah, I just wasn't going to work, really. It's not a vibe. But does he do like stints? It's not like cruise ships. What's the sitch? Like how long do you have to be on a charter for?

Well, on the church. So he's in the Caribbean in the winter. Mediterranean in the summer. Like all year. Yeah, it's an all year moment. It sounds like all year. It sounds impossible. It's absolutely impossible.

But we make it possible, you know? Always. And you can make whatever you want to happen. Fight for this love. No. If he heard this. As Cheryl once famously said, yeah, fight for this love. Yeah.

So I'm hoping it's that, oh, you're on the phone. to your girlfriend. I think it could be that. No, but then I got a very strange message after. From him. And it's late, isn't it? This is like your late.

It's embarrassingly late for me. Like it's 1 a. She's trying to be a corporate baddies. She can't be going to bedded. We can't be going to bedded. No, I'm not. Sometimes corporate baddies do burn candles at both ends. Yeah.

So I don't know if you watched industry. Yeah, absolutely. There's no sleep. I've never seen those people sleep. No. So if you're going to corporate baddie, you best be up till 1 a.m. Absolutely.

So he then said, I said, heard that. I just panicked. I was like, no, that's fine. I'm a bit banter. Cool, a spade. He's like,

that looked really bad. We'll explain. That was at 1am. And then I was like, if you, oh my God, I can't believe I said this. If you had a girl

from this whole time, I'll swing for you. That's funny. It's like, it's like, yeah. Like, joking about violence, always funny.

Yeah. It's fine. I like it. Yeah, and then at 3 a. At 3 a.m. So this is like 3 hours. Are you asleep now?

Are you asleep now? I'm asleep. But you know when you're just not having a good, you're like, he needs, you're dreaming? I'm pumped. No, one's been sleeping. I literally haven't slept. It's fine. No, so I'm checking the phone seeing if he's for one serious one.

He has ed. And then he put, you wouldn't win, don't worry. So that's fine about the swinging, I'm assuming. Yeah. Yeah. And then he put, but honestly, just someone on the boat were very close and she came in with the tea. Why would he tell you?

Why would I give a shit? That's exactly what I thought. Who your clothes was on the boat? Yeah, I don't catch. She? A fuck. It better. You should just reply.

She put you question. respond it. Because I was like, I don't actually know it to respond. Why don't you respond and say, is she prettier than me? Real talk. No, why don't you respond and say, why do you think I would care? That's sort of the angle I'm going to go for, but why do you think that was an appropriate thing to say? I obviously don't care. But he's allowed to have friends on the bar. But why do you tell me there's one girl that you're close with? That's jaw right. I didn't like, we're friends. Yeah, but you'd say friends. Friends. Very close. He's giving. Knock, knock, I've got a tea. Want to put you in my mouth. Fine.

Is what I read. That's how I'm really. I think that might be a jump. That could be a stretch, but have you watched below death? Yeah, I have. So then it's not a leap. He is, yeah, he's Adam and he doesn't live a below-dead lifestyle, but I just know. He does. Is he your, like, are there legs here?

There's no legs. Because I'm feeling like this is a corpse. It's dead in the water. He was dead and then we're back in the touch. Jack's not doing. It's dead. Jack doesn't have a mic, but Jack's in agreement. No, I don't know if there's legs or not, but I was open to it.

He's like, we can be friends. we should go on holiday. Do you want to go on friends? What? Sorry. Just my thought process always like, I don't need more friends. Well, that's what I thought,

but I thought he's kind of, he's hot. I guess he's like dangling the Caribbean. Do you want to go on a holiday with your friend though? That's your ex. I, well, yeah. Well, it wouldn't be friendly, would it, in the Caribbean? Do you know what this is giving?

I'm so sorry, Izzy. Your frontal lobe is so fucking far away from developed. It's because you have 26. It's very much developed. It should be in by now. No, no, no. No, 26 is absolutely no way in it. No, but like scientifically.

That's not true. 30. I read for women. 30. I swear boys are slower than girls. Yeah. 35. Fact check.

Look it up. How old? I read the other day that they've, it's 30 for women. I just don't think that's true. How old are you when your frontal lobe? 25. The final structural refinements can continue. continue into the early 30s.

So maybe there's a few of us that are having tricky with our structural refinements. That's what this is given. She's 26. You haven't even hit your sat and returns yet. Thing is you've just got to live your life, sis. Like, it's good for the plot, isn't it?

To be like chatting to your ex who's on a boat. I get it. It's funny. Like, okay, let's go on holidays to the caravan. It's hilarious. You just do shit for the plot and I actually fucking love it. Absolutely.

Absolutely. I'm gagging for a holiday. You joke it. Charge it to the plot. When you're in that state, of like, you know, delirium. You can get to a level where you fantasise about finding a rich man so that you can take their yacht to go and pick up your ex-boyfriend.

Very specific. Yeah, it's like, yeah. It's like, obviously, but you do need an ex-boyfriend. The only thing I've ever, like, fantasised like that about is, like, buying a billboard outside of someone's house. That's not fantasy. Like, I've looked at, like, rental space in a... The reality.

Yeah. I'm literally, like, looking up all the ex-post codes. Whoever... I don't know who's listening. A-cast, audio, always. Spotify, Apple. If you're in the market for some billboards, the only requirement in the contract will be.

It's hilarious because they'll be like, they'll be like, it's not really got much thoroughfare and we'll be like, no dramas. No problem. It's got the one piece of thoroughfare that we need. So I wouldn't worry about it. We won't worry about it, brother. We won't take the expensive slots in Leicester's Sky.

No. Couldn't get less. We'll have the cheapies. How on the sticks? Wow. Okay, well, I like it. Keep us posted. I will.

Don't spend too many late nights wasted on him That's the only thing I would say This is the first time I've done this Not tonight Because you've got to get your kitten heels on tomorrow You've got to be a corporate baddie Tomorrow and it's your big day Your big chance

Your audacity Of us To talk about corporate baddies Grace Beverley is fucking She's fuming She's fuming with rage I could never With my chest say I was a corporate baddie

Ever, ever I don't think anyone was I just want to get that on the record I would never. Imagine looking at corporate baddie in the face and being like, ha, corporate buddies! She'd be like, you're down on my shoe. Move on.

Okay, join us in part two for your Gali's voice notes. Slay. I really realised about us recently. We're not good with a script. We're not good with the script. Because I was editing that video yesterday. And when we had to say Wednesday on Netflix, it was not good.

It was no good. It was not giving BAFTA noms. Right. Well, we need to work on that. I know. Because if we want to have a long-lasting television career. Because when someone said to us that Antendekar scripted, I thought, oh dear, career over. We can't read a script.

Well, also, they read a script like they're not reading a script. That's why they're so good at their jokes. Exactly. So let me try. Go on. Let me. My wee is coming out. Also, it's so funny because it does say Ali slash G, but like because Ali's first, I will always take the back seat.

I'll just sit here, coat tails. I'm like, you know, a young Kardashian sister. I'm not trying to seek the limelike here. Oh yeah. G is the younger sister in this dynamic. 100%. So get it, sis. Okay.

The way. So what we're going to do is we're going to. I am going to book you in for some sort of appointment. I don't know who we're in. But that laugh is no point out. So I will be having to book you in somewhere. Right, guys. I best get on my NHS app.

See what they've got available for wheezing. Christ. Oh no. What is that tear on your nostril? Oh. Who sometimes happens to me. I'm so sorry. I just kind of.

Also me just reveling in it. I'm not even going to try. Come on, you're having it. I'll just reply my life. Guys, join us in part two for your voice. Because they're going to be seriously slay. Okay, part two. Now it's time for part two.

Hey, welcome back. Al's just recovering, briefly, briefly. Just must check my... Must check that. Severin's seen Al's new phone charm. It's... This... It's being big.

So... The case is sleigh. The charm is wild. The charm is so stupid and in the night it does do this. Why on your phone in the night? I got lots... I got... I got up at all costs to review.

Of course. You trolling fucking parenting out. Yeah, the chain is not very practical, but it's not about practical. It's about... What could we call the galleys this week, based off of this new situation you've got going on. Pearl. Good.

Pearl's a nice name. We should bring that back. Granny names are coming back, aren't they? Yeah, because everyone's now gone off the stupid moonbeam ice cream, whatever the fuck people are calling me meant. Nora Smith, did you ever see that video? Moonbeam ice cream. Do you know Nora Smith?

No. You do? Should I? Yes, babe. Who is she? She doesn't know anything. Who is she? And where did you find her?

She's the Mormon that makes those really amazing meals. Oh, course. I should know the Mormon who makes the meals in the Couture. She's got like 50 million followers. The internet is a big place. Do you know it's crazy how many accounts there are with millions and millions of followers? You wouldn't know them from Adam. Let me show.

I think you will know her in the street and think just another lovely lady dressed in Couture. I wouldn't know her. That's mad, isn't it? Nara Smith. Her husband is called Lucky, which is a name I love. Really? What for a man? Sorry, 50 was strong.

4.8 mil but on TikTok it's more. If you were on a dating up and you saw a guy called Lucky, I think you'd just swipe on by. Do you think? Yeah. Why? Unless it was like Field, then I'd be like Slay. Gonna get lucky. 12.4 million.

15 million. Of course I don't know her. 12.4. Charts play. This is Nara. Anyway, what are you telling me about her? Don't know her. Her kids have the stupidest names. Really?

And she just had a fourth baby and she did a genuine video that was like, names I'm considering, this is how she was, names I'm considering for her fourth baby, moonbeam ice cream. Like, like no fucking Joe. Dead serious. She can't be dead serious. What did she call her children in the end? These are the children. So we've got Rumble honey, Slim Easy, Wimsy Lou and Forney Golden.

Okay, Forney Golden, Slay. Whimsie Lou Slay, Slim Easy, Slay. Whimsy Lou is a little Dr. Zeus for me. Peggy Lou, Grinchy Groo. Slim Easy is giving Eminem. Slim Easy is Eminem. Slay, I guess. But Rumble, honey, if my name was Rumble, I'd be fuming. Sorry, speaking of Eminet, it's Nikki Minaj okay?

No, absolutely not. Have you seen her on stage with Trump? Yeah. I have seen it and I just think, what's going on there? Many celebrities on our list of people to check on. Amanda Bines, Nikki Minaj. Nothing to check on. She's a Republican that loves Trump. Nothing to know.

Has she always been? Well, I think she's... Her lyrics don't give Republican to me. I don't know. True. Starships, I meant that's giving a Republican. Starships are meant to fly. Republican.

Fair. So, anyway, they'll be called Pearl this week. Pearl. Yeah, I like it. Okay, let's have our... Voice Note number one. Hey girls. I love the podcast.

I'm so excited. It's back. Anyway, I need some advice. Long story short, a 20-year-old virgin, my third year of uni. I thought that coming to uni would really like, I'd know, open things up for me, that evidently nothing has ever happened. The most I've had is to snog from a boy in a club at the start of first year. And bisexual, too, which makes the situation worse, I think.

It's like playing for both teams and scoring for none. I also sometimes dress a bit like a tomboy, like a guy and our friend group has literally said to me that he doesn't see me as a woman and instead is one of the guys. I know, it's pretty rough. me and my friends go out like three times a week and we all talk and dance with loads of different people but all my friends are so pretty that men just get with them instead. I can admit I'm in like five out of ten, medium ugly and kind of fat, so my expectations are low,

but still, I want something to happen. I think eating dating actually at uni is kind of weird, so I don't want to do that. Also, to make things worse, I've obviously lied to my friends saying I'm not a virgin and I'm scared that one time I'll get really drunk and forget my lies and tell them the truth. We'd love to hear your advice. Love you. Bye. I love you, babe. Okay. Babe, this is really common to feel this way, I think, especially when you haven't yet had the kind of illusion of losing your virginity shattered, to be honest, because it's this big thing that feels kind of scary, like something that everyone else is doing and you're not. not like some kind of club that you're not a part of. And as soon as you do it, you'll realize

that there was nothing to worry about. It wasn't as amazing as you thought it would be. It didn't change you overnight. It like, you know, it's the beginning of a certain journey, but you're already on that journey. Like snogging in a club, that's one step. And everyone moves at different paces. It's just really hard when you're in a group setting where that's kind of a lot of what's on the mind there's not much else to do at uni all you're thinking about is like pulling and I think it's really important for you to get to a place where you know your self-worth before you even do that like I had that for years where I was like all my friends had boyfriends and I didn't so I became so fixated on this idea of like wanting to be validated by men and like you really don't need to be

like you can validate yourself and that'll be a much healthier place to make those decisions decisions from and I think you'll be grateful for waiting because you might end up picking a much better person because you've done that. This is what I was going to say is I think like, I think that losing your virginity is almost like it's become such a thing of like a tick box exercise rather than just it being like when you're ready with a person that's right for you. Being like an experience that's actually really can be quite meaningful rather than just something to just do and get done so you can be in the club. Like, I lost my virginity in a way that I actually wish I hadn't.

And like, if I could go back and give myself one piece of advice that I probably wouldn't have listened to because when you're 16, you think you know everything. But like, it's more, you only get to do that once. And like now when I look back on that, I think, I mean, you know, I don't feel any way about it. It's been obviously so many years. But like, I do think, oh, maybe there is a world in which I, could have had a really, like, G had such a nice experience with such a nice person,

and I had the opposite. And what an amazing thing to have. Because you need a really safe space, otherwise it is something that feels, because it is quite, it feels like almost like something that you, like, I don't know, like, you know, you have to eat something, like your vegetables first so that you can have like cake or whatever. Yeah. It can feel a bit like that.

And it's like, it doesn't have to be like that. It doesn't, but it also kind of is like that. Like, I don't know many people. that had like, I don't, I wouldn't see losing your virginity actually our sex. Do you know what I mean? Like, it's like that kind of, it's, it's, it's, it's like, it's, it's like, it's an experimentation. It's like something that has to get done before you can even put your training wheels on. Yeah, because you don't know anything. Yeah. And like, even if you wait, like, even if I had waited till like 20, 25, I still wouldn't have really known. Like, you think you know. No, no, sorry, I'm not even talking about waiting. I'm just talking about waiting for the person, like for the, it's about the person. It's about the person.

more than about like the age. Right, you could be 25 and a virgin and still not know. But I think it's more about like I was in a rush to do it because I was late. The pressure from others. And so I just was like, oh, well, I'll just do it with this guy that I'm currently like, dating is even a lose term snocking. Yeah. And it didn't have to be that way. No, you could await it.

I could await it. And had you not had the pressure of everyone else around you being like, wait, you're still a virgin. Yeah. Like even the fact that you feel you can't tell your friends, like that's really difficult because in a dream world you would be surrounded by people that didn't bat an eyelid at that and they were just like cool you haven't found the person to do it with yeah move on because it's really not that big a deal is that like it's switching it from being like I haven't found the person to do it with rather than I'm not a virgin like it's in there too if you can try and separate

them as two different things like I'm a virgin because I haven't found the right person not I'm a virgin because I've not been I don't know I just think there's like a pressure to just like do it get it done, take the box. Rather than like specifically, sorry, this is like a bit of a ramble. But like, I don't know, I just think this is a really, really common theme. We've heard this so many times on this podcast. Like lots of girls feeling a certain way about losing their virginity and like feeling exactly like, you know, they want to keep up and like they're not in the club and feeling

like anxiety about going to uni without having had sex. And it's like if we, even just in yourself, you can just like take some of that pressure off, you never know, the perfect like moment or opportunity might present itself. It's like when you're in this like tense state of mind where you're like, I have to do this one thing and it's so stressful. It's so anxiety inducing and like everyone around me is and I can't tell anyone and it's this big secret. It's like, whoa for a sec, you know? What, like take the pressure off. Yeah. Yeah. I was just thinking I've got a, um, I had a friend at uni that was by and she was also a virgin when we started uni and she like found it much easier to have sex with girls. And for ages,

that's just like all that she really explored because for her it just felt safer and like nicer. And I think because she allowed herself to do that when it then came to having sex with a guy, kind of didn't feel like that like big first thing because she had been exploring herself like through sex with women. And she had become comfortable in herself, in her own skin, in a space. So I don't know whether that's maybe a cheat code for you. is that you're by, like, brilliant. Like, if there's girls that you feel like you want to, you know, do that with first, great.

Like, that takes you out of that kind of like, I'm a virgin, that kind of like those shackles of that label so that you can at least, like, rid yourself of that. And then you can start looking at people a bit more just like an option of your next, you know, lover. But even if you don't, like, if you don't feel brave enough to do that with a girl, you can do that with yourself. Like, you know, when you're younger, you're not exploring your body.

You're literally like, that's what I mean about virginity. It feels like this big mountain to climb before like the rest of your sexual world opens up. And it's like you can actually just like start exploring your own body with a toy all on your own, having never had sex with a man or a woman, to be honest. Maybe that will make you feel like also a bit more in control. Yeah. And also like a bit more desirable. Like you want to get to a place where you know your worth. Like this is so much easier said than done.

and like it's taken me years to get to a place where I don't feel like I have to compare myself to like my friends or other girls or to think that I'm not like deserving of love and attraction. But you want to work on that because you don't want to be feeling like your self-esteem is so low that you can't even imagine getting with anyone anyway. Because like I'm sure that you are beautiful and brilliant just the way you are. You just need to like know that in yourself. And there is someone for everyone. Like everyone's beautiful to someone. Like that's all you need to know. And comparing yourself to your friends,

you've got to nip that in the bud. Because they would never say those things about you, I'm sure. And you wouldn't say that about them. So you can start speaking to yourself maybe a little bit more kindly. And I think that might like open you up as well. But yeah, Al's right. I think it's all about taking the pressure off. And it's hard to do that when we're in like a...

In a social environment where like sex is at the forefront of every, kind of every social interaction at uni, to be totally honest. Yeah. A lot of like, even banter, it's all about sex. I know. And like, that's really normal, but it's also really okay and also normal to feel the way that you're feeling. And also I really think you would be surprised how many people, because it's not something that people talk about,

how many people go to uni as a virgin and feel exactly. this way and they're like, oh my, oh my God, it's like crippling. Or they've slept with like one person once and it's like, well, yeah, technically I've lost my virginity. But like, it's nothing, meaningless. I'm not having sex. So like, it's all like, everyone's got different layers of like what they're coming to uni with.

And I think that's fine. I'd tell my friends, you know. I would, like, also, what are they going to say? And also, if they say anything bad, see her, not my friends. Well, if they say anything bad, they're not your friends. Exactly. Yeah. I think I'd probably say, guys, I love.

about losing my virginity so that you at least take that thing off your shoulders. I lost my virginity really late. I was 17 and like all of my friends had already... Yeah, really late in your group because I don't think that is that late. I don't know what the average is. Oh, I think the average is probably much younger than that.

Do you think? Yeah, much younger. I think it's actually probably scary, like scary young. I mean, I was scary young when I look back now. 16 to 17. Oh, fine. Average age I was. Yeah.

But that's what I mean. Okay, that's a perfect example. You felt late when you were. I felt like I was the last person. On planet earth. No, no, genuinely that I knew. There was one other girl at that summer. I so vividly remember.

I actually think she might even still be a virgin because like then time just passed and then she was like, oh well, I'm just going to save myself for marriage. But at the time I remember feeling like, that's kind of I think probably why I had the experience that I did because I felt this immense pressure to just take the box, get it over and get it over and done with, join the club like start living my life.

I know. crazy when you think of other like that because you would never now see it like that. Now, guys. Looking back. Now, fucking hell, if I can get, if I can go a month. I've actually decided I will save myself a marriage. Just realized that that would be a great idea. But that's a good example of me feeling a really certain way and actually like zooming out.

What would two years have done to you? Also, it's such a flex if you can stand in that power. and be like, yeah, I'm just waiting for the right person. That is the coolest girl ever. I'll be like, okay, cool. And so for a boy, like, that is, I can imagine that's actually quite sexy. Yeah. Because it's like, oh, I know that's that whole like fetishising around the Virgin, isn't there?

It's all a bit of dark. No, but it's not even about that. It's about like, I know my own worth enough. Yes. To give that to anyone, that's not deserving of that. And then at the same time, I just want to caveat that as like, also don't put too much expectation even if you're with the right person. Like, I had an incredible experience.

but I wouldn't say that was the sex of my life. Wouldn't even call it sex. I don't know what we did. So I wouldn't worry too much about like waiting and then it being this big thing as well. I don't even think it. It's not actually about the, it's not actually about the sex. It's about the experience of feeling held and safe with one person for the first time ever. Yeah.

That's it. That is an expectation that could be met. Babe, I hope you feel better. You're good. Good as you are. You wait. You're more than good as you are. You're 10 out of 10 as you are.

All right. Amen. And every time you forget that, you look in the mirror and you say you, you are a 10 out of 10 and you are brilliant and you are beautiful. And you are worth it and you are enough. All right. Okay. Play this back if you need to help. Right.

Do you used to do this? Write it on your mirror. Yeah, I did. Went through a stagecarse where it was pretty tricky to look in the mirror. So I literally covered it in like bits of whatever I needed. Like my like deepest, darkest insecurity I would just flip and write on the mirror. Great. I had that.

I would have it on a post-it note. Yeah. It just said, you are enough. Great. Every day look at it. Also, they do say, I've taken this from many therapists, put a little picture of you as a young child on your mirror. She has on her home screen. Because you're like, I would never speak to her like that.

You would never talk to her. Ever. Ever. The way that you talk to yourself now. That's actually been a huge help for me. I don't think I'll ever get rid of that. Maybe even when I've got my own kids. It will still just be me.

a kid everyone would be like that is that your daughter? No, that's just me. Okay, very exciting. It's now time for an email from a boy. Oh my God. Oh my God! Sound the alarms! Just sounded.

Come again. Come again. Also remember if you want to send us an email, you can at hello at leaveamessagepod. Come. Hi, Ali and G. My girl best friend recently got a boyfriend. Let's call him Will. Let's.

Will and I have always had a slightly weird friendship. For context, I'm a gay man and he's straight. We talk on and off, but never constantly. A couple of months ago, my friend and Will got really serious, and that's when things started to feel off. He calls me all the time and sends me photos that I'd consider strange for a straight guy to send. What? Especially one who's taken by my best friends.

Nothing explicit, but gym picks in underwear sunbed photos. No! Mirror bicep shot. Sexy? E.T.C. Oh my God, what is ETC? Like quad shot? It's got to be a quad shot.

Bum shot. Sexy. Close up of the bum. Oh my God, I love a gym pick. Honestly, that's the only kind of dirty pick I would ever want, yeah. But I actually like video. I probably should talk to my therapist about that. Anyway, moving on.

He also compliments my looks quite a lot. Oh, interesting. Will's asked to go out on drives with both me and my friends. Drives. Drives. Drives. Drives to go out on drives. Drives.

Is that what the kids do now? But also drives with just me. Drives? Yes, baby. Just the two of them. Drives. That's giving dogging. Drives.

When he's out, he'll randomly message asking if I can come and see him. I've never seen him in a romantic way only as a friend, but recently the vibe has started to throw me off. Weird. Obviously. I can't tell if I'm reading into this too much, or if he genuinely sees me as a close friend. But the semi-thirstrap photos feel like a boundary being crossed. To agree.

Especially for your friend. I also feel bad for my best friend, Will's girlfriend. Exactly. We've been close for five plus years, but I'm apparently at the top of her boyfriend's best friend's list. It gets awkward when she mentions something he's said or done, and I already know about it because we talk so much. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Very messy here. This is bad. I'm starting to question whether he's actually straight and honestly, He's not. I think I'm starting to catch feelings for him too. No! No! Don't do that!

What does this all mean? Is Will Gay? How do I handle the feelings while protecting my friendship with my best friend and my own feelings? Fuck me. This is bad. This is some love island shit. This is not good. This is worse than Love Island.

Yeah, I know. This is no good. No, Bueno. Bad, bad, bad boots. You're not, we just spoke about it at the top of the ebb. You can't be even getting into a position where, you're catching feelings for your friend's partner. This is bad.

Gay, straight, upside down, roundabout, doesn't matter. You can't see them like that. Unless you think it's love and it's enough to lose your friendship over. Because that's what's going to happen. This is messy. My honest opinion is Will's gay. Will's obviously gay. But that doesn't mean that you can like him.

It's your friend's boyfriend. Oh, hold on. Oh dear. She's just aligning the moral compass, just checking it. I think it's a bit more complicated in this situation than a straight up best friend's boyfriend because... Is it? Because Will doesn't even know he's gay. Yeah, so hell Will out the closet by all means.

Lend him a helping hand. But that's what I mean you can't... Not a helping hand job. No, but you can lend him a helping hand. Do you know why? I do, but this is really... It's hard because the only way you can lend him a helping hand is by... ending in my helping hand job in this situation.

No, because you can say, listen, as a gay man who struggled to come out, maybe, I'm just putting that on you, maybe you didn't struggle or did or didn't, you could say I'm sensing my gay darts a little bit lit up. It's like me and Raw and Raw and having a gay best friend. Yes. And then Raw and your best friend having a little thing. Well, yeah, are you guys actually best friends? Let me just go back and check that.

Pearl 2 is friends with the girlfriend. My girl best friend. Oh, I think Pearl 2 is really hard because I think I understand why that kind of like attention from him and also the fact that maybe you're like the only guy that he's ever felt this way about would make you feel like... You like him. You like him and there's feelings there. But I just want to bring your attention back to your best friend and remind you that you do love her. And him needing to come out is a different thing.

Yes, agree. You guys having feelings for each other. Like, they can be two separate things because I think if you're going to go down the feelings route, you are accepting that you're going to really hurt your best friend. Like, really hurt. Well, can I just say, it's actually okay for you to have feelings if you never do anything about them.

Yeah. Like, that's allowed. You are allowed to feel the way that you're feeling towards him because he's moving mad. But that's it. I know. It's really hard, though, because what if it's love and Will and Pearl Two are meant to be to?

Well, that was my caveat is that like, you know, if this is the greatest love story of all time. This is what I always say with stuff like this, whenever we have these kind of conundrums, I think it's, and I know it's hard to know, but it's only worth the risk if you two are forever. Oh, completely agree. And I don't know how you know that. Like, that's why I would never get in a position where the risk was even there to take, personally. But the problem is, I don't really think Pearl 2's done much to get in that position. I think Will has thrown his biceps at Pearl 2.

Do you know what I mean? So like I really understand How it's accidentally slipped. Because it would be really different if you went out of your way to like pursue your bisoned pictures on Will. Yeah. But also it's kind of giving that your girlfriend,

your girl best friend should like low key know that the behaviour is crossing boundaries for you. Because maybe this is enough for it to be like a downfall of their relationship anyway. He's like he's gay and you think your boyfriend's straight. But that's what I mean. Like let's bring her into the light. shall we?

She's in the darkness. She knows nothing. I think before you do that, I think you need to have a conversation with Will. And be like, why you... Because I don't think that she needs to know, like... Just yet. Just yet.

Like, let's give him some grace. And also, let's kind of protect her because whatever's happening here. It's not ideal. It's not ideal. Because also, it's not enough that you're just like a gay guy because it's still inappropriate the behaviour. Like, if Raw were always sending me bicepics,

I might be a bit like UK, okay. I would genuinely be like, Are you okay? What are you looking for from me right now? And if he said, oh, well, you were once a PT and I want you to tell me my definition's good. I'd be like that. Well, no, that's not even the worst bit.

The worst bit is going on drives. And he'll randomly ask, message and ask if I can come and see him. Like, that's not right. That's not right. Without the girlfriend involved. So I think first step is you say to Will, we need to speak. And you need to be really, really boundaryed. And like, it will be hard.

because if he's already behaving like this, who knows what he'll say when he's right in front of you. Well, you never know. He might be like, didn't realise how keen he was being. Like, he still might have a bit of, you know, internalised homophobia going on. You never know.

That's not right. I know. No, no, but as in like, if he's not even self-aware enough to think that what he's doing is not right, there's a problem there. Will needs to look in the mirror up by the sounds of it and maybe you have to be the one to hold the mirror up.

I was just about to say. Because you have to be like, like, you might need to put it in a language he understands. Like, imagine if, if I was a single girl, how your girlfriend would, our friend would feel. Do you know what I mean? Because it's like you're kind of like disguising your behaviour under the fact that I'm a gay man. Right.

And you're not into me. Let's script some lines. Good. So you could say, I feel really uncomfortable about the fact that our friendship has maybe crossed a boundary. To me, those boundaries are X, Y, Z, list out. This is a good email. You could refer back to your point. Refer back to the things you've always written in this either.

These are the times when I felt like we crossed the boundary. You could say you cross the fucking boundary. I mean, you're going on the drives, Peltu. Listen, I'm not here to like, you know, call you out. But you can say in the beginning, I thought like we were just friends. I thought it was innocent. Yeah. But then when...

Then I saw your biceps. Then when you started sending me... Underwear pics. Gym. Sunbed photos. I don't say anyone for sunbed photos. Has he got the little goggles on? The little things.

Those little eye things. Those icons. Basically set that up and then you can say I just want to... It's erotic. That's erotic. Sorry. That is crossing the line. I wouldn't send that to anyone.

Not even your partner. No. Like, is that everyone... Like, okay, objectively, yeah, I would. Objectively. Exactly. You wouldn't send it to me. You never know.

You might send the funny one of it. just that I don't guess. The other day was so funny because I put on all that lingerie in and I meant to take a photo and send it to you. Sis! I know. You forgot. But that's a good example of someone doing like to see that. Yeah, obviously.

Well, that's crossing a boundary actually. Boundary stepped. But you could say as a gay man. Yeah. Because I'm not straight. Like if we were two straight men, maybe that wouldn't cross that same boundary. But because I am attracted to men. Yes.

And actually you. now I've seen so much of your body because you can think, yeah, I feel uncomfortable and I feel like maybe it's a wider conversation that you or we or human thingy. I don't think we gave thingy a name. Thingy. The human thingy need to have. Yes.

Because it feels like you're living misaligned, my friend. And I just like to help you get aligned. Like you can say, I really think that you can have that conversation in quite like a relaxed. And out of care for thingy. Yeah. Because that can be. Like you, you then aren't allowing your feelings to snowball,

and that's like the kindest thing that you can do. Because I do think there has to be a point where you decide that you're falling down a slippery slope. Well, this is the final question. Or you don't. How do I handle the situation while I protect my friendship with my best friend and my own feelings, final line? The response to that is you now have to set,

you now have to put your line in the sand, and you have to say, you can't send me that. Exactly. I will not go on dry with you. I can't receive it. Like, as much as I have enjoyed it. You're in my limerence now and it's no good. It's no good and this is getting messy

and I love my birth. I love thingy. Sure. As should you. So this isn't right and we need to stop this. Yeah. This needs a part two.

You need to come back because I know that Will's not going to take this well. I can just feel it in my bones. He's living misaligned. He's me and when you're living misaligned and someone tries to align you, bit of resistance. Been there done that.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, that's a story for another time of when we were misaligned. You were misaligned last week. Did you get aligned after last week? You said you just needed a wank and then everything would be fine. I thought you stupid.

No, I wanked so much last week. I'm not aligned. And I'm leaving my therapist. Oh my God, misaligned. No, it's a good thing. I'm just going to have a little break. No, that's not the misalignment. You were saying, oh, I'll just have a wank and then everything will be fine.

Is everything for you? fine? Yeah, it was feeling pretty good. I woke up this morning and I was like, gas, Tuesday coffee, just did Adam a Monday. She went to me this morning. Woo! Tuesday coffees! We have coffee every day, but we never have coffee here. I was in the shower this morning. I thought, oh my God, I literally, I cannot wait to see her. Guys, it's been, it's been less than two days. I know. I feel sick. I woke up, I thought, I have this often. I have this with you when I don't see you. And then I have this with all sometimes if we have really busy week. I have this thing like, so I saw her on Saturday. This is really, really codependent.

I saw her on Saturday and I thought, oh my God, all day, got home at 7pm. Today's Tuesday morning, I was like, oh my God, what if she looked different in the last two days and I didn't get to see what she looked like on Saturday for a day? I have it with what you've eaten? I'm like, what if she's eating something that I don't know about? That would be weird. What if she thought something or made a joke that I don't know about? That's not right.

If you came in hot off the press with a new joke and I didn't know about it, I'd be like, well, sort of. That was like the other day. What did I say? When you matched with that guy on Hinge and then you sat here and you talked about it like I knew it and I thought you fucking what? I don't know it. I don't know that.

Guys, my Hinge is like a desert. Raya! No water. What, the one that you were saying? Sorry, not Raya. Field. Field. Yeah, I'm going to get on field.

I've tried Raya again. I'm now up to 14 referrals, still being ghosted. Right, okay, this is serious. Sorry, I have to just say, on the topic of Raya, we'll circle back. Did everyone listen? well, I hope you did. If you were listening to the episode when we were talking about

the galleys and HMRC Oh my God, why there's so many of you? The number of DMs being like, lol all the galleys at HMRC are like lolling listening to this. So good thing to know, we've got people on our side if the tax man ever comes after us.

I hope they would be on our side. Obviously they would be... Sorry. Guys. Galley's obviously is the... Like the galley's communities comes before your job. Before HMRC.

Like before your partner. Yeah. honestly really before anything. True. True, true, true. It's like, you know, blood. Ride or die. But on that, if anyone, this is not a joke, okay,

and this is Beggy, and I will sit here and beg, okay? She's not afraid of a bag. We've got the Daily Mail to get Paptin. We need to get G on Raya. If anyone here is listening that genuinely works at Raya, know someone at Raya,

works for the marketing agency for Raya. Like, honestly, any fucking relation to Raya, get in touch. It's hello at leaveemessagepod.com and Izzy will be glad to receive your message. Glad. She'll be eagerly waiting.

Okay. I've got a new plan. I'll have to tell you off cam. Okay. But it's going to be good. I'm going to catch a famer. I can't wait. It's like going hunting.

Should we do a roundup? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Par one, the 20 year old virgin. Yeah. Which now I think about it more and more is also slu. I think it's a flex.

Like, there are, you're a rare breed. Yeah. Cool. Also, I just think so much of this is about reframing and about your relationship with yourself. Like, if you can find it cool and if you can find yourself. Oh, yes. Brilliant.

No matter what. Yes. That is genuinely all that matters. That can be applied to do anything in life. Because then you can do anything with your chest. Totally agree. That's all this is. So if that needs to be on a post-it, no.

If it needs to be on your home, phone screen if it needs to be verbally, you know, repeated again and again and again, then I really, really beg you to do that. Guys, this, sorry, this is like those fucking glasses, those stupid little glasses, those me, me, me glasses, which I have, that were so lame until Bella Hadid decided they were cool. And now everyone on earth thinks that's true. That's fashion, that's trend. So, like, you can genuinely apply that to anything. Anything. Like, I think that all the time about like, I don't know, like, I don't know if this is the right turn of phrase, but nerds or geeks.

They were really lame. And then everyone wanted to date, like, Carly Closs married the biggest nerd on the planet. He fucking owns Snapchat. He's like a, the like number one coder. He is top nerd. He's top nerd. And he's married to a supermodel because all of a sudden, everyone just decided that geeks were cool.

Also, it's the same with anything. Like we say it all the time, we were talking about short kings last week. If you decide that you don't give a fuck, great, your partner can be five foot nothing. It doesn't matter because you've decided, I think he's hot. Slay. Well, this is like anything in life. It's only important if it's important to you. So just make it not important.

Exactly. No one likes my tattoos. Do I care and do I keep getting them? Yes, I do. Great, Slay. Sorry, got a bit passionate there, Per one, but you need it. It's just like, if we live in a while, where like everything else matters really other than what we think and it's like the only thing

that matters is what you think is what you think power number two tread with caution okay as your older sisters i'm just going to say this seriously for two seconds tread with caution okay and sadly in this situation you're going to have to be the person to put your big girl pants on yeah and just you know set the record straight here on a number of different you know trajectories just protect yourself and protect your friend and just don't forget you your friend means more to you than the potential with this guy.

Okay. What we loved and what we didn't love from this ep. What we loved. You being unable to get your words out and just hysterically crying was probably one of my favorite moments of this week so far.

What we loved, reframing genuinely everything but in this instance losing your virginity. Yes. What we loved, charging it to the plot. Yes, good.

What we love, To be honest, being a straight man's fetish, sexy. Sleigh. Sleigh, hard to lay. Take nothing else from that situation but just being his fetish. Leave everything else at the door. What we loved, your friend's boyfriends being like pets. Very good.

What we didn't love having two shags in a weekend. It's far too many. Can I tell you the biggest problem? The things I do for two shags in a weekend. I would honestly sell a kidney. Sometimes I feel bad telling you because I am aware of that. Yeah, your privilege. Yeah, I know.

I don't. She's privileged blind. It's embarrassing. I know. Yeah, and you complain about it. I know. That's literally like someone with like, you know, two houses and central heating complaining about it.

It's cozy. That's what I said last week. Show me a privileged person. I'll show you a tortured soul. Exactly. That's me. And look at you tortured, complaining, complaining about getting your five a day. And I will continue to complain.

Can I tell you one more complaint? Valentine's Day is coming up. Can't wait. I could have had a month off if it was March. Oh, this is birthday. But if it was April. No, because then it's Easter. God is risen.

Sure. When Jesus rises, we rise to. I would be doing it round the clock if I could. You know this and I'm jealous. Okay, I've said it. I'm jealous. Things I didn't like, you complaining about something you say. With someone who loves you and wants to make you come.

Poor you. boo who boo who I've just loved so much about this out there's not much I haven't loved no things we didn't love not getting on Rea yeah obviously

but also receiving unsolicited biset picks oh I don't know also sounds like you're complaining about privilege all these complaints about nice nice things I got no words

things fucking five-star reviews and writing it out on Apple Podcasts. Thank you. Things we loved. Our first email from a boy. Really good. It's always nice to be the first. There wasn't, unless you're losing your virginity.

Oh yeah. Maybe it's about your virginity. Be the last. Cooler. Just saying. Yeah, not much I didn't love here. I've literally loved a lot. Guys, if you have got...

Didn't love you staying up till three in the morning. To be honest. I thought we were charging it to the plot. Oh yeah. Sorry. Love charging it to the plot. Great. Let Izzy live her life, okay?

She's got plot to plot. Okay, this is important now. And this is, you know, if you listen to one part, listen to this. If you've got a story or a dilemma that only we can help you with, please send us a voice note on our WhatsApp, 07342-6179792. Or click the link in the episode description. It's much easier. I would recommend doing that.

You can also watch us on YouTube. Yeah, get it. It's a sleigh, actually. Is it? Looks good. Looks good. I never watch. This is the good thing about us. Al watches I listen, you know when we review. Oh, I watch every week. Yeah. I think we look sleigh. Do you? Yeah. Good. At least someone's looking out for us.

You just need to search, leave a message podcast or head over to the Allie and G YouTube channel where you should be subscribed. Obviously. Sorry, there was a bit of aggression in my voice there. No, no. Get aggressive. Sleeping on it. The numbers aren't adding up. You can't have that many numbers on TikTok. and that little number's on YouTube doesn't make sense. You know? Just doing maths.

And one more time, just let's get this in there. Let's get that plug in there for Izzy. Don't forget to leave a review. All right. We've just re-downloaded Apple Podcast to do that so you could do the same grace. Also, she's just posted as herself. So just like if you see Reedy G out there.

It's me. And I believe everything I said. Thank you so much for joining us on Leave a Message. We love you. See you next week. Bye!