Legends of Avantris - Beneath Dark Wings | Ep. 65 | Memories Unmasked: Part 1

Episode Date: September 25, 2025

Zurn's plot reaches its climax...   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris     Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/bRYQnyXZAGs?si=eQtgfFhgUOdeX-5D

Hey man, welcome to the legends of a interest. I'm Toa Kamenui, and you're listening to Beneathar Quings. Here's basically what happened last time. Last time on Beneathurk Wings, who wants to give a recap of what happened? Not me, considering I couldn't even remember the whole goat-slash-go-go-slash-go-knu. We always do it poorly, and then you have to do it again. I like it. Let's see.

I don't think I took notes last time either. Last time on Beneatharck Wings, we founded a restaurant called to dinner, and did someone say breakfast, but what about lunch and tea? Question mark. Iris died. Oh, yeah? Yeah, it started off with Iris being killed. Killed by his hat.

Then we had a fight. We don't see this happen. And we switch to smoke that bitch. Yeah, and Caprice forced Toa to put him down. Yeah, he turned to me. Oh, God, that was awful. I cast people mind on him because I was like, Maybe we should keep him alive for a...

Oh, Toa, no. Oh, oh, oh, no. And then, after we killed him, we pretended to be him and told his servants to fuck off. And then we decided to go to the Black Pyramid, and we went through the storm and became mad. Yes, we teleported there. We teleported there, and then we went through the madness,

and had a bunch of stacking her PFX. It was a lot of fun. Did we know that Zern was waiting for us there? No. Or was that a surprise? No, we knew he was there. I thought so. We knew we were trying to find him.

We were told by a newbis as well. We were told Zern was there. We were told somebody. An envoy of the Raven Queen was there. Is it what we were told. But I think we could have assumed... I assumed it was certain. That it was certain.

Well, Kelsey. It has a shot. Zern. I think he says that. Field the term. That should be a sketching like that. And then

we get to the pyramid and it's bulging disgustingly and in a non-Euclidean way. Non-Euclidean is my favorite word. It's a great phrase. And then we see Zern standing at the

gate of the pyramid. And that is where we end of the session. Oh, we know one more important thing. What did I forget? He was standing in front of a very intricate chalk drawing with different artifacts and things. Yes. And there was one missing piece.

I have the description of that. A ruin and silver ink on the ground. Six points with items, a crystal ball, a bloodied tavern, cracked glass vial, bloodstained needle, small bluebird statuette, and a blacksmith hammer. At the center, a tracing of the talon blade. Yeah, thank you. That was much better. And it wasn't chalk. It wasn't. I misremembered. Awesome. So, great recap guys. Oh, yes, of course. My brother and his, I wasn't going to say better half because that's kind of weird. That's really funny, though.

That's a really, I don't know how I feel about that, dude, but it's a good one. I don't know how I feel about it, but it's a good one. Let's roll the intro. Yeah. Derek. We start and you see the curvature of Evandrum. You're floating in the astral plane.

And we turn, just as the sun starts to peek over the horizon, we start rocketing towards, we just fly right through avatres and it explode. Like the final spell that Sephiroth casts at the end of Final Fantasy 7, even though that would kill everyone, and that's his whole plot. Why is that... He could happen three times

the whole fight. That doesn't make any fucking sense. How many Bahamas are there? Beneath our Gwitz. You all stand before what has only been called the Black Pyramid to you. This is the tomb, the prison of Thar's Dune, the chain god, where this entity was sealed away long, long ago when humanity was new. after attempting to have been summoned into the prime material plane by Ancatep. At that point, the high priest of set.

And in the countless eons that followed, the chain god has been trapped away with the power of 14 seals from 14 pieces of the god Osiris. and combined with the power of the mist of the primordial force of death, and a strange, even older power of death to seal away such an incredible destructive power of chaos and entropy. And you stand before this prison, this tomb, with the ship. shimmering cocoon of golden magic that had been impuged over this black pyramid by the god Anubis as it is cracking with every passing minute. You see now as this huge pyramid, a massive

structure of black stone bulges out in certain parts, violently trying to almost erupt from within. You see the huge stone doors to the structure with the dormant seals and sigils around it, bulging forward and sliding back. The chain of God soon to be unchained. However, standing very calmly before you as the five of you stand at the top of the massive set of stairs that lead up to this jet black pyramid is a man that you've known for months. Virgil Zern, human man with long silvery hair, very prominent nose and angular features, heavy brow, stares down inquisitively and thoughtfully in a large runic circle before him, intricately drawn onto the stone with strange

items at certain points around the outer ring of this circle. And at the very center, seemingly drawn as the outline of a curved blade with a small handle. And he stands before you with four large feathery wings folded behind his back. Clearly not entirely just a man as his familiar large black six-eyed raven drops a shimmering arcane piece of chalk into his hand and he clenches it tight in his fist and places it into his coat his only working arm and before Virgil Zern you hear the low squawking and moaning human-like childlike voices of what has been referred referred to as the Raven Child, a two-headed,

avian raven-like creature of two halves flesh crafted from Milo Ackerman, Felix's brother, and Valesca, the little Vestani girl that you had saved very temporarily, but absconded away in the night in Escher's castle. And it's at this point, that Zern has welcomed you to this place, but he's made no motion to turn to you or speak to you

as you hear the voices, those four eyes look at you, of the pained avian creature, as it squawks out as this pyramid pulses and shakes, what do you all do? Are you gonna be okay? I don't know, Tella. I don't know about anything anymore. I have to press forward. Whether I'm gonna be okay or not. I gotta figure out what all of this means.

Oh, great for you, but... Are we close enough to Zern? Yeah, yeah, he's like 20 feet away from now. Hey, Zern! Oh, that's probably a better idea. Oi! Yes. You've come to join me at the end of existence. The... the end of existence?

Well, not if we can help it. I have told you that I plan on saving this universe, this world, and all the world is beyond no matter the cost. You've got one opportunity to tell me your plan and convince me to help you out. That's it. I'm giving you one chance. Start talking. Let me change the music. Zern finally finishes examining the runic circle on the stone before him. As he turns to you, his eyes dart down very quickly to the blade at your side, and back to look at you very clearly maintaining eye contact, a look of steely determination.

He says, it was you to whom our goddess came and told you the significance of the blade that you hold. That's right. And the blessing that she put upon it, I intend on that weapon being the salvation of your brother and my son. Yeah, but how? The use of the raven child. is a vessel, vessel for Thara's Dune.

It is of the same primordial power that seals him in this tomb. It was the intention of Vorok and Ankhattep to trap him in the creature you see before you, transforming it into a beast of apocalypse. Incredibly powerful, yes, but controllable. Which, the chain guard left to his own devices.

Thari's Dune is not controllable by any man, God or devil. I intend to make it more manageable. I intend to fulfill the role of the Raven Child. It will. They will. take on the full power of Thari's dune, but he has been weakened, shirked down by the rod of law, by the seven angels, reduced to a helpless weakened form, and then, once consumed by that creature,

that blade, once we do what must be done, which you must assist me, earth, I will wield. I will sever the beast in two. It will split the children, restoring them by the power of the Raven Queen. I will turn the blade on myself. And with my death, Thora's Dune will be sent to the fortress of memories to remain for eternity in the collection of the Raven Queen. So just so I get this straight, you think I'm just going to give you my Talongard dagger? When the time comes, yes. Unless you think that you have the Constitution to survive an instant, with Thorough's

dune coursing through your veins. I can survive anything if it means saving my brother. I assure you you cannot. You're insane if you think I'm going to relinquish this blade. Perhaps I am. but do you hear that? And he points with his one good arm. And although he's cast some sort of magical charm on you

to reduce the maddening gibbering, you hear the horrible maddened babbling of Thorough's dune from within. And it's getting louder and louder is insanity. That insanity is far more horrifying. than anything that I have ever dreamed. What that will do to the universe is immeasurable. Do you understand, boy?

Do you wish to turn the blade on yourself? I'm trying to save your life as well, Felix. Felix, it seems like a good deal. If we can... You get your brother back. If we can trust him, and he's telling the truth. That's true. So, so the play, how are we going to use the rod of law against, against Thoris Dune?

Out of character, when was the last time we saw the rod of law? Uh, the window itself. It was in Akka. That's right. Okay. Yep. Got it. Zern turns to you, Luffy.

You have the feather that your mother gave you. Presumably. I'm sure I do somewhere. Yeah, I've got it. You didn't lose it, did you? No, I think I tied it on my spoon. I totally haven't. I swear.

Yeah. Yeah, I just have it hidden more safe keeping. I just have to go for it. No, I think I tied it to the end of my spoon, if I'm remembering that correctly. Uh, we haven't. That's a very precarious place to put it in giving that is critical to the savior of the universe. Maybe I tie it in my hair. I put it somewhere.

Fashionable. Oh, oh, here it is. Once that door breaks open, once the power of Anubis finally cracks and breaks and breaks, and Thari's dune starts to become unchained, he will be vulnerable as he exits the tomb. That is when you call upon the wind-dukes. wind dukes, they'll have a single strike. They all know what to do. This is not the first time they have used the RAD of Law as you have seen. So it has to be instantaneous? What if the timing's wrong? Can't we give them like a heads up? Then we are doomed. What is it going to

look like? Thar is Dune? Yeah. I can't even begin to fathom. If that's what it sounds like, I just I don't know. He, uh, he turns to you and says, I have been planning this moment for almost my entire life. Once I had seen in my nightmares what was to come. I have been putting the pieces on the board. It has all been coming to this. The last piece.

The last piece is to harness the power of death, the final remand, the new goddess of death. This is old magic. It does not mean it is inherently better. Felix, you know that. We give the Raven Queen her foothold here. Take this power. Combine it with hers. Thar's doom will be no match.

if it is this primitive power that can hold the chain god imagine how impenetrable how in in inescapable it must be to be locked away in the fortress of memories so you're okay with dying for this that was always your plan no my original plan was to kill that creature It's so like mine is tethered to the fortress of memories. But as soon as the opportunity presented itself to save my son, my only child, sacrifice of my life is nothing. What if you're wrong about any one of these steps? so many moving parts. How can you know that?

This will go right, and then this will go right, and then this will go right, and then we'll get rid of Tharo's Dune for good, and everything will be saved? How can you possibly know that you haven't been manipulated? You haven't had an error in judgment? I believe I am 12 steps ahead. Any adversary, especially some creature is maddened, and thoughtless as Thore's Dune. that is the only chance that we have.

If he was not so completely incomprehensibly insane, we would stand no chance. And if this all goes wrong, and my death does nothing, then I suppose you start praying, perhaps calling upon the aid of your friends. I've only got one question. Yes, Felix.

After all this time, Can you look me in the eye and tell me you honestly believe that that bird, and I point to the Six-Eyed Raven, was sent to you by the Raven Queen? Or have you been lying to us this whole time? The raven ruffles its feathers, and it opens its jagged beak and lets out a menacing croak at you. And Zern hesitates. and he narrows his eyes and he says sometimes, boy,

we must do things, terrible things, unspeakable things to achieve a greater good, to achieve the power necessary to save the universe. Saving a child, what is that

in the scheme of the cosmos? Felix. I told you before, I am ready to sacrifice the life of my child. I will sacrifice mine first. But any sacrifice, any sacrifice, do you think I could have gotten this far without assistance? Felix. I noticed he didn't really answer my friend's question. No.

And he looks you directly in the eye. You have seen what it can do. you have seen and he turns to you Caprice. You know the immeasurable power. You know what can be achieved. And in the grand scheme of things, whatever my fall, if there is to be one, will be a price well worth it.

Have you not taken aid, Caprize? From a lord of lies, a being of evil, allied with a creature you spit venom at me for who have been in treachery maintaining a war

between devils and demons for countless millennia. Are you any better than I, Caprice? I admit that was a mistake. That was wrong. I saved my own hide. I was selfish. I will spend the rest of my life

trying to make up for those choices. I don't want us to make another mistake now. Trust the wrong thing. Make a wrong choice again. The choice is yours. I cannot force you to assist me in this. I cannot force you to join me in her realm in the world of memory, to feed her the power she requires,

to harness the power of your fate touch. anima. I cannot force you to do that. Just like I was not forced to do any of this, you are the only ones who can put an end to the chained God. And there is no end. There is just imprisonment, locked away. And there is no guarantee that once Thore's Dune is in the fortress of memory, that he will not one day in countless millennia when all of us are forgotten and what's happened here

is long forgotten by all beings mortal and not that he will one day attempt to break free again and succeed it pulses again it's louder

and it's in your head and you feel it you feel it just as much inside of your mind as you do in your ears as it pulses again and you see the bricks sliding out and rumbling and sliding back in impossibly. So, but I mean, even if we stop it now, that at least buys like time, right? Like lots of time. Presumably, like a whole bunch of time.

That is my intention. It is my hope that my godess will be able to keep the remnant of Thari's Dune in her collection for eternity. But all of the futures I see, every single step, every single possibility, there is no guarantee. There is never a guarantee with how many possibilities and outcomes there are.

Do you wish, Felix, to wield the blade yourself? Do you wish to split the Raven Child and then end yourself? You doom your brother to being alone. When the Raven Queen gave me this vision, she said that I would have to do what needed to be done. That I would have to have the strength to do what needed to be done with the blade. She didn't mention turning it on myself. But in that moment, I was accepting of doing whatever needed to be done to save Milo.

Well, Felix, maybe whatever needs to be done is giving your... Your dagger too soon. Maybe that's what she meant. You might be right. All we can do is if we choose to move forward, just trust him. Even though every fiber of my being is screaming the other way. Do you have to give up the dagger? Can he just stab me in the back right at that moment? Why does it have to be you? Why does it have to be me? Who turns the player? on the Ravenchild. It's because with the slicing of the tether that Ravanovnavian von

Zorovic put on those children, the power of Farah's doom, that terrible entropy will enter me. I will be in a manner of speaking, an avatar consumed, possessed by madness and Thorese Dune himself. Either one of us takes it on, or he breaks free. If you are quick with a feather in the wind dukes come when called, he will be manageable for a time. That is the only reason we can take on that power and survive for even moments, and not be completely lost to evil.

When you think that you can do that, still turn the blade on yourself even though you're consumed with madness. I will have a moment and he stretches out his four wings and back, and fold them back.

The changes to my body, power that courses through me gives me a constitution that far out exceeds that of any mortal. He's right. I would be ripped to shreds immediately.

I'd be completely atomized, probably almost instantly. You would, even at his weakened state. I hate to admit it. I will have control of my own mind for moments, but that is all I need. I don't think we have a choice. We came all this way to save Milo, and more importantly, everyone and everything. thing. We have to at least try and deal with things as they fall. And Zun's willing to sacrifice himself for the sake of your brother.

Any son, but also your brother. I don't trust him. I don't either. I don't either way. I just don't see any other way. I do trust you. Thank you, but to be quite frank, I have no idea what we're doing. I know more than any of you guys, but here we are, and I...

I don't see any other way. We don't have any other ideas. So either we let it get out and we're screwed. Or we do this and we're screwed. Or maybe it works out. Who knows? All right. Zarin, I'm in.

For now. I'm in. Are you absolutely certain? To show you that I do mean what I say when you do have a choice, Felix Ackerman. If you wish to wield the blade yourself, an attempt to develop the Constitution, you know what you must say thrice. But I believe it is far too later for that. I have spent my entire life. Look, the logical side of me is saying that you've done everything you can to prepare for this. And it doesn't make sense to deviate from that now.

Granted, until you just brought it up. I guess suppose there is a plan B or plan C, but no, you sound like you know what you're doing. There is a reason that you all came to Strigger, that you return, that you three arrived on these shores. Well, not these shores, the shores of my home. There's a reason you all met. I believe it is to be here. To put an end to this madness. I cannot think of a being or an entity.

Worse than what resides, meters from us. In the grand scheme of thing, that level of destructive power, anything else. But you have the choice. Here at the end of the universe, you always have a choice. Fate is real. You were all fated to meet. You were fated to be here.

I believe in that. But fate is what we do with it. It's the choices that we make. There is always a choice. It is a coward and a weak man who says he had no choice. We have no choice. Excuses of weak men and women, not willing to feel confident in what must be done. terrified, of feeling resolute about anything a day in their lives. Hardly, hardly even human.

I looked up to you almost my entire life. And right now, I'm choosing to follow you one last time. And that's it. That's my choice. I thank you, Felix Ackerman. This will be the last opportunity you have. Are you all ready? Let's do the plan. I'm excited about the plan. Let's do the plan. As they say it, Macbeth, let's fucking go. I'm sorry I didn't say something cryptic about anubis. Something cryptic about anubis.

Would this chitty chat time have counted as a shortrest? Yes. I would say that you're able to take a shortrest. It actually might be kind of huge. I feel like I'm going to need all my hip points. Oh, yeah, good point. I definitely did take some damage. Yeah, everyone makes sure you're using your hit dice.

It's the arcane recovery though that I'm really feeling good about. Oh, just kidding. Arcane recovery lets you do a combined level of eight, but no more than sixth level or higher. Yes. Unfortunately, so I cannot recover my telephone for it. I'm out of level seven spells. You are? I think I only have the one.

I think it's only one level seven. I just haven't used any of my... Oh, I used... I teleport us here first thing. Oh. Well, you shouldn't have done that. Yeah, right. Now you can't get out.

I know. Well, I can upcast... No. Nope. Can't upcast teleport. You can't? No. Why not?

You can't upcast every spell. It just doesn't... Oh, it just won't do anything to it. Yeah. It's nothing additional. So if it doesn't show, you can still do it. Yes. Yeah.

I didn't know that. Yeah. Okay. Like, I had no idea. Healing word, obviously, upcasts, but it says that. It does. Yeah. I just assume you couldn't.

Everything I have. Let me just use some hit dice here. One, two, three. I probably want to need, like... You might need it. What does that mean, Mike? It's off the cryptic. Something cryptic about this.

Oh. Oh, yeah, I'm good. That's going to be 10, 15, 16, 17 plus 12 is 29. Nice. That's hot fire. Yeah, that puts me in a 400 max. So I'm good.

I'm at max. Now it rests Oh wow I've used a lot of hit dice Oh my God Yeah but it's like Hit dice are one of those things that we rarely ever use So it's like use them if you got them It's safe for yourself

More like shit dice That's what I'm saying More like X shit You hear the It's okay Milo It's all right We can fix this You see that there

are That there is a The Runex symbol that the Raven child is standing upon is of a very similar makeup to the one that is before Zerm. And you see those six mementos, for lack of a better term, and the phrase that I'll be using throughout this session, of the six mementos that are placed evenly, evenly spaced around in the circle. And you know that the number six has been something that that has been obviously a recurring theme with Zern.

And you see the items, and you see that one seems to be a very old-looking blacksmith's hammer that almost seems to be plated in silver of some kind of shimmers. And it's carved with the adornments of some, like owl adornments. and you see another in another circle there is a crystal ball that almost continues to hum but very faintly. You see that there's a single crack running down the middle of it, and it hums with this purple energy. You see a very ancient looking piece of cloth that that seems to be tattered. And as you look closer,

it seems to be just mostly brown. As you look and you realize that this is formerly white and gold, but has been just drenched in long-crusted blood. And throughout the the hardened blood, you can see that on this cloth

there might have been a woven symbol. of a sun or a sunrise of some kind upon it. You then see in the fourth place is what looks to be a rounded, a rectangular bottle that is uncorked, no corked, is if a cork were to be there. And it shimmers with a strange kind of, not quite an energy, but it seems to be treated with a very special glass that almost kind of glints a shimmering blue. And I would say that with your bag of holding and what you've experienced, you might think, oh, I would check Sophia Anna's stuff and you find a bottle of holy water.

And it seems to be almost like the identical to the exact same bottle. vaccine bottle. How much do you want to bet that one state tavern is a von Zavarvich artifact? Hmm. I feel like it was the shroud of Turin. I don't know what that is. Oh, Jesus, what does that mean, Derek? I prefer the shroud of Toblero.

Oh, God, face your hand. And the last, the sixth spot seems to be a large, almost garishly, almost cartoonishly jagged and large and horrifying-looking needle. With a little bit of remnant of a horrible shimmering thread that's been snapped off, coated similarly in dried blood. And... Yeah, my thoughts exactly. What was that?

He said, what the hell? And I said my sentiments, exactly. And you see that there also seems to... to be some adornments on the needle as well. As they just look like lines at first, and then you realize that they are in the pattern of spider's legs on the needle. Oh, God.

We're stitched together. I was going to say it's like her flesh stitching needle. And then in the fifth placement in this arcade room, and you'd be able to tell that even though it's circular, that the way that the arcane symbology is drawn, that there's a first, one, two, three, four, five, six. And in the fifth spot, you see a pop of color, there's no dried blood, you see a small statuette of a bluebird

that looks very familiar to you. Yeah. This, it looks like Beatrice, and for good reason. It looks very similar, if not identical, to the little carved bluebird that sat on your mother's nightstand in the fifth slot of this arcane circle and you've been so focused on the man Zern and questioning him that you've finally just taken the time to observe this silver glowing runic circle and

that's what you see. So just to clarify, All of the artifacts are where they should be minus the bottle that we have, and obviously the dagger. So the bottle is there. It just seems to be, it's a similar. It's an empty, an empty bottle. Got it. Got it. Okay. Cool. Glad I asked. And you said so both circles match. What do you mean? The one that the Raven Child's in and then the other one? Yes. Yeah, they seem to be of similar construction. There are no mementos in that circle. But, The one that the Raven Child is. Yes, the one that Raven Child is in. Got it.

And you see, though, that there are circle, empty circles. There are circles still painted on the ground that do not have anything in them. Got it. All right, Zern, what's next? He looks at the Runic Circle, and then he looks at you, and he says, we must return to similarly to what you did when you entered my city, your city, in Zentra, when you received the blessing of the Raven Queen, you know that we deal in secrets and memories. That is how we will give the Raven Queen her power. That is how we

will tap into her magnificent hold on death. Give her a foothold through the mist into this dark place. be able to infuse that blade with the power to split the Raven Child and restore them. Not just to bring an end, but to restore them, heal them, turn them to their human forms. They will just be sleeping children. And then also take the evil within that creature and transfer it to the soul of its There's power in blood. You'll know that, Felix. There's power in memory. Any gestures to the mementos in the alchemical circle. There is a reason why Ravanovia and Vorok needed to kidnap, torture, murder. So many children. It had to be the right bloodlines. It had to be the right bloodline, but while also possessing the innocence of death, the innocence of children.

The strange way that the weave operates. Still a mystery to me, although I've studied it's my entire life. These mentors connect to that bloodline, directly tied to the power of the raven child. and where you come in is connecting to the heart and the soul of the raven child, more than just blood, the love, the emotion, the memory, your brother. Even the brief time you spent with that little girl, when she felt safe, trusting and loving, that will be enough. But the Raven Queen deals in mementos and memories. And you gave up a secret, several secrets. But it's the power of memory, all of your memories, and facing those memories, that will give this magic the power to save your brother and the Vistani girl.

And he gestures over to the empty spots. We will need to place a memento, anything you have of importance. connected to a special memory, and something you are willing to sacrifice, for when this spell is complete, that memento will be in the collection of the Raven Queen, in the fortress of memories forever,

and it will connect all of your memories to her collection. She will be able to peer through your entire mind, your entire life, Your entire soul, it requires a vulnerability that is indescribable, but freeing. Does that sound amenable to you? Yes, I'm not backing out now. All right. Well, I'm ready when you are, Felix.

I'm ready. I know what I can offer. Maybe you should go first, because I don't know what I want to offer you. Sure. Join me. I've never been more sure of anything in my whole life. He steps for me. forward and he has you all circle around the Raven Child.

Although it's called the Raven Child that it is made from two small humans, this is a large avian monstrosity that is not tethered, it's not held down, but looks very weak. It does have wings, but they're folded back. It looks like its heads are too big for its body. its body at this age or this stage. And you get the sense that

the, what Zern said about what the plan had been of Vorok and Ravanaughia and Ankheteb, you can't imagine what this creature would transform into if it was able to absorb and consume the power of Thara's doom. Jesus. And he gestures to the six slots. And he says, we will place each of us a memento, and then we will be searched by the Raven Queen, our entire lives. And she will take the memory that you offer here,

but then we will go to her collection. We will go to that beautiful fortress. We will go to the world of memories. And she will choose an impactful one. We must face them together. You are already for this. I'm ready. And then once we do that,

then facing the memories held in those ancient mementos behind us would be nothing. Very well. Felix, are you starting any gestures to the... First Slod. Ever since we landed here, it's been hot. We're in the desert. I have not been wearing my signature overcoat. I am not wearing my gloves.

My sleeves are rolled up. I'm wearing this tan, dirty, ratty under shirt, and it's hot and sticky and some sweaty. And, you know, it's very clear. You know, we're in the desert. Very uncharted. Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly. I'm still wearing my boots in my pants.

but I've, you know, gotten rid of the extra layers that I don't need. My talangard dagger is visible on my hip as well as my spellbook on my other hip, both attached to my belt through various means. And as I approach this spot that Zern motions to, I'm quietly... It's okay. It's all right, Milo. I'm here. We're going to fix this. It's okay. You see his feathers kind of on his half.

It's kind of a really weird sensation. You know that there's a slight color variation between the feathers on each side, and the one on Milo's side definitely raise up as he looks at you with wide human eyes. These are not bird eyes. All right. As he just said, brother.

I know, I know. I finally found you, and I'm here. And I promise you, I'm not gonna leave you behind. It's gonna be all right. And I'm gonna very slowly reach for my spellbook as I unbuckle it from my belt. And as I'm looking at my brother, my incredible memory is basically playing

the entirety of my brother's life as I've known him through my mind. And I'm thinking of all of the times that we spent together and before my mother passed, our mother passed. And I start shifting through the pages and I say out loud, I know it's been a long time since we've seen her. and I know that I haven't always been there

because I was out trying to make something of myself for us, for the people that took us in, for the townsfolk. I wanted to make something of me to do better for all of us. But I always kept this with me, always, and it's been in my spellbook ever since the beginning. I know that you used to draw for fun, and you're pretty good at it too. And I couldn't tell you what happened to most of those drawings,

but I saved this one. And out of some random, stuck between two pages of my spellbook, I will pull out a piece of parchment that looks very old. You know, not like super old. Yeah. Within maybe 10 years old, seven years old, a better part of a decade. And I will unfold it. And I'll say, look, Milo.

Look, I kept this drawing that you did of our mom. And I've never lost it even to this day. Look. And I'll hold it up to him out. after I unfold it. And it's, it's nothing amazing. He was just a kid when you drew a picture of our mother. And then you hear that word from Milo's half.

And then the both has, and then you see the Velasca half, like look around confused, mommy, and they're both then saying it. I never wanted anything to happen to this drawing. But if, if I have to give this up to save you and fix all of this, then I gladly do it in a heartbeat.

Yeah. I look to Zern. I'll just place it down here. His eyes stay lingering on the drawing. It takes him several moments to almost realize that you're addressing him. And he snaps back and looks at you. That would be enough. I know the Raven Queen deals in secrets,

and I still don't know what my mother's part is in all of this. Maybe it's nothing, or maybe I never really knew who she was in the first place, but this is what I have to offer. And I'll set it down where Zern motions or tells me to, and I'll take a few steps back. It's going to be okay, Milo. I promise. It's going to be all right. You place it in the first slot, in the first circle, in the pattern that is around the Raven Child. And similar to the other mementos, there's no... immediate reaction, but it does, you see very faintly the, while the circle around the Raven Child is humming with the same kind of silver arcane magic, it was a bit more dull than the ones

with the six mementos, and it gets a little bit brighter when you place it down and it fills that first lot. It's going to be okay. Zern looks the rest of you. Five more, five mementos. I'll, uh, I have like a small pack on my hip, so I'll open that up and kind of look in. There's really nothing to shuffle through. So I've reached through and pull out a little, it's like a little carved figurine of Leopard. Oh. And it's, all the joints are kind of disjointed. It has a little, little button on it.

So when you push it, it gets slack. Nealytic out and dances. So you mix one part of dance. So I'll play with it for a minute and and chuckle. Brother Gruber made this for me when I was just a little thing. I don't take anything with me.

I don't want to be weighed down, you know. I left home and I was so excited to see all the new things and all the new place and I didn't think I wanted to remember anything from home. I pretended I didn't want to remember anything. But this little thing I've kept with me the whole time because it reminds me of where I came from and the people who love me. But I'm willing to give it up now

because I've been away for so long and I haven't been doing them any good. being away. I don't know if they're safe, if they are okay. So I'm giving it up because I'm going to make them okay. This is going to work.

And when we leave here, I'm going to go home. And I'm going to hug Brother Goober. You won't have to be a memory. But they'll make him dance more than that. You do, and you see as he kind of like, he plays him down in the wooden statue. Just the little figurine does a little bit of a shimmy and a shake.

and you see as the runic pattern gets a little bit brighter, as he gestures and you place it in the fourth slot. As that's where Zern has requested you place that. I can go next. I'll reach in my bag and pull out like sort of a long line with a couple hooks and things. I brought this from home and it's been in my pack ever since. This is my fishing tackle and I've caught so many fish with this. The amount of times I've just relaxed and spent all day on my boat, me and my fishing tackle. Just relaxing in the sun and it fed me and I, I guess I didn't feed it, but I kept it, you know, okay.

I took care of it, I maintained it. Hence, memories that this has been a part of is just too many to camp, and I'm going to miss it very much. But I don't fish anymore. You know, at the end of the world,

you'd really have time to fish. Once we say, you'll be able to fish again and it will no longer be a memory. No, I won't, because I don't have my fishing tackle looking at you a new one. It's fine. It's fun. Caprice. I don't need to fish anymore. We have more important things that do than fish. And I'm gonna place it wherever he tells me to. He gestures to the third slot. It slides off of the circle and falls down the stairs like a slinky. The third slot, yeah.

up and I give Toa like a big pet on the back. You'll be all right. All right, buddy. Iris? Iris steps forward and she says something cryptic about anubis. And how similar sentiments about how she doesn't trust Zern, but you trust Felix. Motion to say instead of something cryptic about Shar, it should be something regal about it. Oh yeah, regal about a new business.

Yeah, that's good. Something regal about anubus. So be written, so be told. And she'll pull out some sort of religious memento perhaps one of her rings that has a powerful family memory and will place it. Oh, shit, she took it like into the... Not a ring, so a scarem.

She stands in the spot and an all her just flumps off from the disgusting glob. Oh, go! What was like, Sphinx cats? She was actually a Sphinx cat the whole time. Yeah, I would say that. that you see a wadget, like a little metal wadgett, the whole eye thing, it's not an eye horse,

but like he places it down and definitely thought you're misprouncing widget. Me too. I didn't know, I don't know, it's a winged skier- right? Is it a wing snake? I did not know that, a wadgett. Wadgett.

Got. Learn something to every day. Wadgett. Mm. I'm gonna get that wadget. A carving of that. Snake type is. Yeah.

I'll look at my hands, and I will pull off my right-hand pinky ring. This was my mom's ring. All these others are cheap by this bottom in a store for a few copper. But this is my mom's wedding ring. My dad gave it to me when I was very young. People always ask me why I was wearing a ring even at such a young age, I told him it was important to me, but I didn't remember why. It was a lie. I was lying.

I remember the day that this was given to me my dad, because he wanted me to have something to remember my mom by. She passed away giving birth to me, and I didn't ever get to know her. And he shared a story after story about her, and it was a very special day. It was a long and beautiful day just at our... A little flat up

above the place where we stole made and sold our instruments. Are you sure? If the world ends, then we're going to have bigger problems than me pairing this ring. I think that I think that it'll be

all right. It's very big of you. Thank you. Mementos. I mean Mementos. Mementos. You, uh, Zern nods at you. as you place it in the second slot, the second circle. And with that, Zern steps forward, the sixth circle in this ring around,

and you see as both of the heads of the Raven Child, they're saying, Mommy, Mommy! And then occasionally the Milo's side, I'll say, brother, and there's very confused, strained voices. And Zern steps forward, and he takes his one good arm, and he reaches behind his back, and he pulls out the great sword that he's able to so effortlessly wield with a single arm. And he looks at it, and he says, This is what started at all. This has given me the strength, but I've come to the end of my road.

Kept me alive, just barely against that. Ork, I've outlasted him. I don't need it anymore. It's yours now. Damn. And he takes it and he very gently places it down on top of the six circles. Definitely too big. But then...

Sure, you're not going to need that? I feel like maybe you'll need it. I will... There's nothing left to fight for me physically. All that's left is... In our memories, our minds, and that blade. And then that will be it for me. It'll be the end.

And what better place for that sword to be than in the fortress of memories? With more fishing tackle. Yes. Do you all remember the first time you experienced death, truly experienced death? Yes. Oh. You will.

And immediately, both rooms erupt in silver light. and with a wave of Zern's one good arm, you hear the flapping of wings all around you as black feathers adrift down and the silver light is nearly blinding as you hear both voices of the Raven Childhood as you are all swallowed by silver light and black feathers

and your consciousness leaves you. If I change music, do you just kill us? You know, I'm not going to lie while he's doing that. As soon as he was like, oh, yeah, no, I'm going to take Thars Dune into myself and become,

you know, just, you know, momentarily just the avatar. I'm like, hold up, bitch. No, fun. Andy's like, no fucking where are we going to let this happen? Oh, no, no, it's fine. I'm just going to momentarily. become the Avatar of Thars, dude.

I certainly don't have the ulterior modus. No, it's just selfless. It's selfless. Trust me, bro. Trust me. Yeah, okay, motherfucker. It could all be horsesh. Oh, absolutely. You can all be more shit. Motherfucker.

We'll say. We're between a rock and a hard place over here, you know? It's a toe of the rock. He is. Toa is my rock. I'm 40% Rod. Gone is the black pyramid. Gone is the desert.

Gone is the eternal sandstorm. The heat is left. The biting sand on the wind no longer strikes you. The shaking of the pyramid and the madden babbling of Thar's dune is now a memory as you stand in a black void something that's slightly familiar to you,

feelings, we'd face that masked woman not so long ago. You feel, though, no sand, the gentle caress of raven's feathers that fall about like a

A winter's day and a light flurry in this dark space. Flicks now of silver are amongst those black feathers. Tiny motes of light. As you see them there, they almost dance in this darkness. And it's not hot. It's not uncomfortably cold. But it's cool. And there's a level of peace.

And still not. this. As you will see, you look around, there is five of you, but you don't see Zern. And then as you look around to find them, Felix, in your periphery, you see a black shape and you feel now perched on your shoulder. You almost expect to see, feel Beatrice and see Beatrice, but you just see a raven. and it's not the massive, six-eyed familiar of Zern. There is a simple raven with black feathers, silvery highlights. It looks at you with knowing eyes far more than any kind of bird should have.

What do you do? I will immediately hold out my hand up to my shoulder to just see if the raven will transfer over to my hand so I can get a better look at it. You do. You're able to, it immediately hops on, and it looks at you as it lets out a croak. I get the feeling that she's close. Can we all hear that? Are we like, together?

You're all together. You're all together. Yeah. Who's close? I got this feeling that wherever we are or wherever this is is, is. was when the Raven Queen visited me in my dreams. Whoa, so she's like going to be here, like a person? I mean, where they're in her domain, or this is some sort of shared vision that she's lending us.

Does she have a big raven head with like a big beak? How would you be called the Raven Queen? How did you describe her before? She's wearing a mask, right? Yeah, she's wearing a, yeah, very blank white mask, not too dissimilar from Alethica wears. Yeah, it's getting very tall. No, she doesn't have a raven face or a head. She's a woman.

She wears a mask. Well, how do you know she doesn't have a raven's face if she wears a mask? How does she get a mask to fit over the beak? Well, that, so one, that's a good point. But two, to Toa's point, the mask wouldn't facilitate any kind of protrusion from the face. Very much like you see right here on this, on this creature. Oh, so she's like a weird gross flat beak? No, I think she just has a humanoid face.

What if she's just pointing the beak down? and looking like this. I feel like it would poke out from a new... Look, I'm the one who saw her, okay? Trust me on this one. Look, if I'm wrong, I don't know, I owe you all a couple gold pieces of piece, all right? But I'm pretty sure she doesn't have a raven face.

We've seen a god before and hit a jackal head, so it stands to reason that all gods have some kind of animal. You know, look, Toa, we've been together for a very long time, and it really frustrates me when you have some semblance of logic that I really can't refute, other than just telling you to trust me. Okay, I'll just see, Felix. You think back no beak to the story that Zellic Scythagos had told you back in Castle

Gloomvale, who never was a real person, about how the Raven Queen allegedly, at least in lore, at least what he told you, used to be an elf. That's exactly right. I recount that because I have 20 intelligence and I certainly didn't forget about it. Yeah. I will look at, I don't know if it's a familiar. representation of her. But I was hoping

that maybe, and I will address the Raven, are you going to lead us? Are you here to help us? What can we do? Make your reception check, Felix. I smashed it. I don't.

Let me figure out what it is, but smashed it. I might be proficient, though. I am. Perception? Yeah. 26. As you look at, as you look at, the raven that has hopped onto your finger, you realize now that you only feel the clutch and the grip

of one of its talents. Oh. As you see that one of its legs is slightly bent and almost like held up slightly and not, and he's standing on one foot. Now, how can I be so foolish? This is Sir. Yeah, look at the feathers.

Look at the way there's silvery detail. I think that's supposed to be kind of like his hair. And then obviously this is kind of jacked up here. He's got a messed up foot. Why is he a bird? Can you understand us, sir? Pick Felix once for yes and twice for no.

No, don't peck me. He pecks you very... No, stop, just croak. Just once. He got him. Yeah, okay. Let's stick to croak and not peck. Why are you a bird here?

That's a great question. Um, I don't think he's gonna be able to answer us. Maybe it has something to do with the deals that he made with certain entities. Oh, no, croak once, if you've always been a raven this whole time, and that's your true form, or croke twice, if you were turned into a raven by the ritual that we just did, and now you're held.

Now you're helpless to help against the end of the world. If a raven could look at you as if you asked the stupidest question that any humanoid-rower... The raven rolls its eyes. That's what the raven would roll. As it lets out a croak and flaps up into the air, as he flies and he swirls around each one of you,

and you you see as he then takes some time and flies and he circles around your head, Felix. And then as he circles around, he then flies off into the blackness. But then you realize now that although it looks like a void that goes

off as far as you can see, you suddenly hear the beak of this bird tap on glass. As you realize, they're actually in an incredibly tight confined space standing on glass, surrounded by glass. And you hear a tap, tap, as the light floods in and crashes and all of reality splits like broken glass around you. For a moment, you hear the cacophony of thousands, hundreds of thousands of thousands. millions of ravens. As you see a brief moment through the glass,

a world of gray and blacks and whites, a massive looming fortress surrounding by barren crags, surrounded by a cacophony of ravens. As you see it off in the distance, a low glow, but it's just grays and blacks and whites. As then the glass splits around and reforms,

and suddenly, you are you hear the shouting of voices as I changed our music that sound was murder what is what was that a joke yeah it was the joke the murder of ravens is a thing I thought no isn't that prose

but isn't it a interchangeable I don't think so I'm pretty sure that a group of ravens is called a conspiracy You know, I think you're right. Fuck. But hey, you know, I knew what you were going for. Well, maybe it's the Crow Queen, not the Raven Queen this whole time. Don't be disrespectful.

I'm sorry. I still think that she's got a face of a raven, and that behind the mask is a portal. What did I just tell, Tella? Don't be disrespectful. Oh, there's like a portable hole inside the mask. You guys are dicks. You are faced with the terror. horrified look of a young man as he stares at you and you jump back for a moment.

And you realize this is just a statue. Young human lad can't be older than 18 or 19. Eyes wide in terror. You see dark stone all around you in the shouting of voices. As Felix, you look around, And this is an incredibly familiar place to you. Your friends are nowhere to be seen. You are in the simulation training halls of the Korovacian Academy of the Arcane. You see a large pedestal off to the side where

You see uniformed military officials and instructors are watching. As you hear the panicked shouts of recruits, trainees, your blasts of magic firing off. And you hear a guttural hissing, rumbling growl that shakes the core of your memory, basilisks. This is your first real field training. And you look around and you are no longer with your friends. You are with your squad. As trainee Felix Ackerman is the squad leader for this simulation.

Okay, okay. As the four of you are different people. And now you get your packets. Oh, that's pretty cool. So a lot of these. Sure. A pick your packet. So I have to just, don't open these.

I will not open them, but I will keep them. So what you're going to do is you are going to open up your character name. Look this. A. We've got packets. Look at this. This is a stack of papers. I'm sure to show this on streaming a little bit better.

It's a stack of folded things. So I assume we definitely shouldn't drop them. No. I'm gonna look at a particular order. Oh, okay. Don't know. I mean, they are in order, but they don't need to be. All right.

So I'm thinking in my packet for you. That's pretty good. I'm so excited. Get up and see what I mean. So you need to open up, I believe your character name in A. I think that's right. I'm gonna weigh them out.

Yes. A. And if something doesn't seem right, let me know. No, this seems right. Okay. Even though my goal references myself. Just Felix or all of us. Uh, yeah. All of us. All of you. Okay. So your name A. My name A. Not my name. Let me just make sure that this is all correct. I'm going to put them out.

Yep. I assume that this just means myself. Yep. Yeah, we're good. You look, um, you look around and you see the, um, that familiar spellbook of black leather. being gripped by the gloved hands of instructor Schlaven, who is the brutal Shlaben, instructor Shlaben. And he, you see as he, his face is scarred and wrinkled. And this old, hardened instructor is, um, feared. Renowned and feared in the academy. And you know that, um, he, whenever he is, uh, running a training or a test that, um, it's one to fear. And you see your squad if you want to

introduce yourselves. You look, you, so the four, the four of you look to Felix and are, are waiting, uh, awaiting what to do. Felix, sir, what's the next order of business here? My name's Bertolt Kruger. I'm a very tall kid, probably like, you know, taller than Felix, certainly. Just give him in a minute. You don't have to rush him. Oh, yeah, I just figured that you might not know what I look like.

No, I appreciate that. I mean, describe yourself. I'm kind of a tall, gangly kid, you know, strong features. features it's sort of skinny and you know a little unsure and I'm looking to Felix who's just way better at the arcane than I am but you know I'm gonna be a talent guard member too and I'm following the lead of Felix question before anybody else introduced themselves am I me now or am I me then you're me then you're perfect that perfect and I am going you are using like your device

right so I can send you what stat blocks to be using oh oh my we all have devices we do you don't you guys have phones I'll be posting in our smedge I love smedge but which discord am I logged into oh god one of her 400 alias is okay Aliye this is the most damn you have ever seen your and so if you need to roll or or use an ability this is I give you a knowing not as you as you as you say those things out of care. This website is diarrhea on mobile. It is. It is. Sorry. And you two are?

I am Conrad Schultz. I am here to become Talen God. Incredible. What do you look like? Conrad? I am human. Thanks. Very awful. I've got like a bowl cut, like very straight black hair and I've got a very like jutting out like chin and just I just, I, I, I, I, I just, I, I, I, I've got a, I, I've I look pretty strong, I'd say. All right, all right, cool. Sasha. Sasha Henning.

I've got a dark long pony tail, and I look just like annoyingly pressed. Like, I am ready. Oh, boy. I got up like an hour early. Oh, geez. Okay. All right, everyone.

Let's just take a deep breath. Like Sasha said, let's not rush. All right. Hi, Felix. Thanks. I know that you're probably just as surprised as me to know that I'm the leader. I wasn't really ready for this. If you are not ready, I will be leader.

No, no, I think that I was chosen for a reason. And as much as I would love to just relinquish this duty, I feel like I'm compelled to move forward. I will trust those who have given you this responsibility. Right, yes, trust. He's also way better at magic than you are. So, I mean, that's why he's the leader. We do not know that for certain. I think I kind of do.

Trust is important. Trust, let's focus on the trust, right? Trust, that was good. And skill. We all have skill. We're here for a reason. We were picked to be a part of this academy for a reason. We didn't just waltz in here.

We had to work very hard for it, and we're going to keep working hard for it. Does that sound good? Is that all right? Am I doing all right? Am I doing all right? Okay. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I'm not really sure what it's supposed to be like. Um, you're not really acting like the instructors, I guess, but... Akerman! Yes, sir! Are you ready? Yeah, yes. You understand. Yeah, yes, I understand.

You understand that if you fail to complete this trial before your competing squad, you will all be disqualified from the opportunity of Talemgard. And you'll be sent to the front lines. Yes, sir, we understand, sir. And I will salute. Ackerman Squad, you proceed in three, two, one. And you hear the rattling of chains as a massive door opens before you as you seal a dark tunnel, which looks like a dungeon.

As you hear the rumbling hiss and the hear the slithering of some type of creatures from beyond. As soon as he says go, even though I'm nervous and sweaty and very, very, clearly don't appear to be ready for this. There's an almost surgical like focus that overcomes me, and I begin to shout orders. All right, Bertolt, you're the tallest, and you're the best at movement and coordination. I need you to fall back immediately and assess the situation.

Conrad, you're the strongest. I need you to be ready to run interference. Nobody has better abjuration and protection magic than you. And Sasha, you're with me. We're going to formulate plans on the fly. And if I need to, I'm going to provide the ultimate firepower. Get ready, squad. You got it. Let's go. Okay.

What are you? Go ahead and tell me what you're doing. You see as it opens up into what looks like a subterranean cave. As you see that although you've, the architecture reminds you of the great citadels and the architecture within Zentra. but the basements and Felix you think back to the time you spent in those that library in the hallways deep beneath the primary citadel of which I can't even remember oh the queen's conclave as it seems to have been built on top of a network of tunnels and caverns that are the native homes to the basilists that live in Korbakia. All right. This seems to be some sort of seek and destroy mission.

The basilists, from what I understand, will most likely be watching us and waiting and maybe testing our abilities. Sasha, you know most about the creatures that we're fighting. If I get something wrong, feel free to correct me. I'm sorry I won't have to. And again, Bertolt, when we have to make strategic decisions on the fly,

I'm expecting you to be my right-hand man. I'm going to leave the best that I can, if tactically something comes up, that might be better, I need you to speak up. Okay. And you, you're our shield, all right? You're the strongest. You're the most stalwart.

It's pronounced shelves. No, I know your name. We don't have time for this. Follow me. And I'll begin to lead them down these twisting caverns and corridors to hopefully find these monsters to eliminate them. You do that. And you make your way

through as you see that you see a figure up ahead as the light is very dim, but you do see that there is the flickering light of magically illuminated wall sconces very clearly established by the Wizards of this academy.

And you see it glinting off of a young woman frozen in eternal terror as she's rearing back. There seems to have been some sort of rock slide in this cavern at some point. as you pass, as you approach her. You see now that the tunnel splits into two different directions. One, you hear the sound of water very clearly going through,

and the other one sounds a little bit more quiet. Okay. Squad, Talenguard daggers are ready. We're going to make sure that we use the mirror sheen of these weapons to check behind corners before we move too quickly. We don't want to end up being petrified forever. Understood? Yeah. All right. Yeah. Berthel, watch behind us.

Move with me. And we're going to slowly move because we start to look around. Sasha, you know what signs to look for for signs of where they may be, where they build their nests, markings on the walls and the caverns. Whatever you see, shout it out.

I'll be looking at the ground for like slithering. Okay, Sasha the vassal. I love that. So make a survival check at advantage. I made an executive decision, and I hope you're okay with it. What is survival? Plus zero.

Okay, so just an 11. That's okay. We're all probably level one. I hate this. You look through the sheen, thanks to Felix's quick thinking. As you hear the shouting and a blast of what sounds like a firebolt

from deeper into the cavern, you presume that that is the competing squad that you are racing against. knowing that you basically need to make it through to the other side to the end of this tunnel system. And if you need to kill a basilisk, you need to kill it. Either way, you have to survive, not petrified. And so you, Sasha, are able to keep an eye out. I'll say with that, you see that there are, you see what looks like to be a petrified leg. as you see that there is towards the corner of this cavern that I'll say that with your knowledge

that these basilisks have, they prefer to lurk and blend in with the stone and stay away from water. You guide them down the path of, with where the rock slide had poured in, and you see that there's a petrified leg with some very clear bite marks out of it. And you get the sense that off,

further down into the tunnel, you see another split where there are scrape marks on the left side versus the right. I just want to say, also, I have no idea if basilics were like Medusos, but that was what I was going for. So if that's just wrong, I apologize. No, it's correct. I'm stupid. Does it?

All right. Do you guys hear that? The other squad is very clearly engaged with one of these creatures. If we can just avoid it, we'll make it to the end, no problem. But if for some reason we do come across one of these basalists, we must destroy it with extreme prejudice, understood? Understood. All right.

Keep with me. Follow Sasha's lead. Should recast me, Jarmer. What? I did that like four hours ago. Yeah, so did I. What were you doing? Come on, come on, we have to keep moving.

We have to win this race. If we can avoid combat at all costs, we'll win. Okay. You do that. So who's the lead? I mean, you know who's the lead? I would say that I'm leading. Okay.

I'm right behind you. But who's the head? But Sasha's... I'll be the lead. You're right behind me. Sasha's next to me. You're bringing up the rear to kind of watch. And because I'm using her knowledge, her expert basilisk knowledge to help lead us through the tunnels. And I'm sort of like looking over my shoulder. Perfect. Okay. Okay. I need a group perception check. Oh, we're all using the same stat block? Yep. I got to find the stat block. Sorry.

It also plus zero, I believe, right? Okay, perfect. Oh, yeah, plus zero. I got 10. 10. We are all, we're extremely average. But to be fair, we'll probably be better than the commoners. Yeah, that's true. We're recruits, though. Makes sense. Right.

I've noticed a smudge on my dagger, and I'm polishing it a little bit when I should be paying attention. You do that, and as you lead, you're being as careful as you can. You're keeping an eye out. But you know that the hardened rocky landscapes of much of Koravakia have bred the hunting basilisks to be the consummate predators. as they're able to blend in and look rocky. They oftentimes, the spikes on their back look like,

oh God, slack mites. Oh. Right? The slagmites are chelagmines. The mites go up and the tights are down. Stalach mites. Yes, got up, slag mites. And Sasha, it's at this point, you are smudging and you just look up absent mindly.

You are still relatively green, as you see a flash of blue from a rock that was not actually a rock. As off in the distance, probably about a 20 feet up ahead, a basilisk opens its eyes at you. I need you to make a... Clothoos do the saving throw for me. Oh, that was the end of Sasha.

Please, yeah, we're leaving you behind. 10. Oh, no. That's not be all right. I don't know. Not enough to fail by like five to eat the Insta. You see the flash of blue, Sasha, as you finish Pauling it,

as you look up as you... You see the basilis and you know that it's too late as you start to feel your skin, your body slowly turning. You know that you only have mere seconds. Do we all see this happen? I would say that you hear that. Yep. And you hear that that guttural hiss. It's like the basalus sounds from World of Warcraft, I'm imagining.

If I have like time, I would just be like, ahead. And so you see. is it's very slow and you get the sense we're not going to roll initiative because that it'll take 80 years but basically that six seconds and you will be able to um let me see hold on it must repeat the saving throat the end of its turn and so you might be able to resist it so we'll see it um turn yet no and so right you see as your you are your throat however is closing up is that that actually um by the sinister nature of this magic it it closes up the throat first and although you're able to move you're turning to stone as you can

hear the hissing of this basilisk. It hasn't made its move yet. So as soon as I would hear the basilisk and hear your, your, your, yeah, I would be trying to be like, ahead. I would, I would immediately snap into leader mode and say, Conrad, you're in charge of carrying her

and then protecting us if need be. Be'holt and I will deal with the basilisk if they get too close. We need to keep moving. She's going to be okay. Come on. It's done and I grab you by the hip And like a football, I lift you up

and I just start to continue on. And we're going to try to avoid engaging and hope that she'll be able to resist as we move forward away from this creature. Make one more saving throw for me. Is the goal to get to the end or to kill Basilisk? It's going to the end. Yeah, so I apologize.

I should have sat that. Got it. I made a very grievous tactical statement at the beginning of this before I knew the... Yes! So as you feel your body closing up, You channel everything that you're all of your training, all of your, um, uh, facing monsters and monstrosities is part of your, uh, curriculum here. As you remember, your breathing exercises and you're,

and channeling the weave and focusing your knowledge of the weave and you're able to resist it as, uh, you still feel very shaken and you're like, you're shaking off a bit of crumbling flashes as, it's like, um, you've got, um, it was super cold and you touched, uh, like a frozen metal and you've lost bits of skin as it's flaking off of you. Think of things that are soft like cheese.

As we're still running. She's going to die. We're all going to die. I'm okay. It's okay. Yes. Sasha, good. Conrad, hold her for as long as she needs. Once she can walk again, we're going to keep running. We're winning us. I know we are. We can do this. Okay, what's your guys speed? Three.

We're pretty quick. Okay. That's not bad. Baselists, they're slow. They're only 20. So I would say that with that bit of knowledge, you see as the basilisk, which had been sitting almost like a boulder

on the side of this rock slide in this cavern, immediately turns as you all see the flash of blue that Sasha had seen. And I will say, for the sake of this, I need you to make a... What's a concentration check? Is that a concentration? So just make a constitution saving throw for me to see if you're able to focus enough.

Make a concentration check, basically. Are you able to concentrate enough on not looking at the vassals? Oh, God. Me too. I got another 10. 11? I'm rolling tens for days. Two.

Oh, God. Sasha's just losing, man. I'm feeling. You are. You are. As you're being carried, as you're, you're, As your eyes had actually almost started crusting over, and you were able to resist it. And as the basil is descending, almost automatically, you look as you see your eyes again.

Oh, crap. Another saving throw. Cosby's a saving throw. Ice cream. Make athletic or acrobatics shots, too. For the ones who are one. 15. You were able to resist.

Athletics. God, Sasha. This is zero. Okay. Oh, God. No. I'm going to go. God, Felix, I'm so sorry.

I'm, like, running, closing my eyes. Oh, good. Me too. We're not running very well. So what do you guys get? Five. It was athletic or acrobatics. Both are zero. 13.

13. You don't have to do it. One. Five. One in five. I will say, with that, Schultz is just bolting ahead, carrying Sasha. I've got one arm out for no reason.

As you are both falling behind. However, you hear the lumbering, hissing, slavering basalus, and you see the flashing blue of its eyes. Just in your periphery, as you see is with that natural one, Bear Toll, your foot catches on a rock formation. You stumble down and you had barely, the only reason why you didn't get, the bassist didn't catch up to you, Felix is because Beartoll was slower than you would stumble. You had just a moment as you as you, as you had been a bit faster than Bear. I'm just going to be a bit better. You hear the basilist descending upon Bertl. What do you do? As soon as I see that we've stumbled, I would tell, I would yell to Conrad. Conrad, keep doing what you're doing and protect Sasha. I'll make sure that Berthold is okay. And with all of the anger and might that I feel in my angsty teenage years, I'd begin firing off firebolts at will to try to pepper this basilisk. to give Berthold a chance to recover and get up and move.

Okay. As I'm yelling at him to get up and recover and move. Okay. I would say just a roll, why don't we just roll one spell attack? Sure. We're going to see how this performs, right? You're blasting off your firebolts. Plus 40.

And there's not looking at it. Oh, that's right. Come on. I have never wanted to double like 12s more than anything in my whole life. I got a 12 as my low roll, which plus four is. 16. 16. It's AC is 15.

Oh, shit. That's why. I will say, as it descends upon you, Bertold, you are clutching your eyes. Oh, God, I'm going to die. As you stumble forward,

as you feel the heat of the fire course over, you blast the basilisk. You have a moment to do something. I need you to make another acrobatics for athletic check for me. As you're doing that and you're scampering and moving, I'm going to yell

to you. Remember your training. Harness the power, the rage inside you, and unleash it is fire! How close is this thing to me? I would say it's like 10 feet away. Five feet. As I'm stumbling up, I would literally just try to shoot fire back at it. Okay, disadvantage.

Getting a fireman from fields. I got a nine for my athletics check. Natural one. Fuck! It's almost, almost good. It crashes. You see that this bear tool is afraid to know that he's been shaken. However, with that, you're able to run, but you're not graceful enough as you are, you glance up and make its eyes.

You need to make a constitution saving throw for me. Oh, God. 17. Yes! You start booking it as you start to run ahead. You hear this thing. However, you know. that with you, as you follow behind Bertolt,

you know that basilis are not fast to run into a straight line. It's very similar to alligators and magical alligators. As you book it and these, the creature cannot, cannot keep up. And it's at this point. That was all Sasha knowledge. I remember her telling me to zigzag. Zingzag.

And then it's at this point, you hear, you come to one more split, and you know that this is the last one from what you had been briefed. That there's only three splits in the entire trial, unless you get lost, then you're basically thumbed. But down one side, you hear the screaming of another squad. as one, as you can see, illuminated from the glowing wall sconces, one of your fellow trainees with a fully petrified leg dragging it

as a bascalisk is descending upon him. The other side, you listen, and it seems to be completely clear. And you actually hear running water, and you know that these, that they generally stay away from water. What do you do? Put me down Put me down Okay

This is why I didn't want to beat the leader We have to make tough decisions Felix I can't go to the front line We have to win Please Please We can't just leave him there

Sach's right We're not leaving our fellow trainees We never leave a man behind We're going after him And we're going to go down the pathway Where we hear the screams of our classmates, and we're going to attempt to save them. Okay, stay close to me. Remember, don't look them in the eyes.

And Bertolt, I believe that you can do this. Summon the strength within and unleash it as magic. How far am I from this trainee? The trainee, I would say, is probably like 50 feet away. As you see that he has shoulder-length blonde hair. Like, oh, no. I'm okay. I'm the owner of a Cadillac.

Yeah. I'm gonna like keep my eyes closed. All right, Felix, you're in charge. Trust me, all right. I trust you. Let's go. And at this point, you see that the basilisk is right upon this private, or this trainee. What are you doing?

You run out and you are sprinting and you see as you are making your way towards this, towards this creature, as it is just moments before this basilisk is able to. If I can, go ahead. No, no, no, please. If I can get, what occurs to Conrad is the best place for me to not look into its eyes is the back of its neck. I would like to attempt to jump on top of the basilisk. Conrad going full loose cannon. I love that. I love that. My father was a talent guard.

His father was a talent guard. He's going to Crocodile D.Ressling. Okay. Okay. And what are you doing? You're going to have to close the gap. Oh, I thought we were just running up. No, you're running up, but basically while you're running,

you're all together. You have time to be throwing things while you're all running. You are going to be doing this. As soon as I see, as Conrad is just booking it. As soon as I see Conrad's gone rogue, I turned to Barrettol. It's okay. You can do this. Conrad, he's gone crazy.

I need you to go in and rescue Armin. And Sasha and I, we're going to pepper it with as much fire as we can. Remember, avert your gaze. Go, go! Go! And zigzag! And then we'll begin to... Are you sure that's over? Yes, you can do this! I believe you! I believe in you!

And I begin to try to cast fireballs. Both of you make a spell attack rule at disadvantage because you're not, you're avoiding your eyes. I'm gonna like try to scamper and get to... I roll double 11s for a 15. A 15, okay. Wait, how do you add? Plus four.

Oh, plus four. It says under... Spell casting me plus four today. I'm on something else. I got a 13. A 13. That crashes into it. As you see as it stops and hesitates,

Armin Zakarius, actually, you know is his name. I knew it. As he is, because it's your memory. As his foot is, the rest of his leg is starting to petrify. And you, and what are you doing, Fairtall? I'm going to try to get to him

and like pull him away from the basilisk while Conrad is doing his thing. Wrestling him. Okay. And we're flashing to get him. Conrad, make, I would say either an athletics or an animal handling check. I jump and I attempt to jump over his neck

and grab onto him with a six. Oh, Jesus. You do that. Say you the other one. I need you to make an acrobatics for an athletics to see if you can get to Armin. Alex. 17.

Yeah! I will say that you grab armin. However, you Conrad, you leap and you just coze right over him. You crash and you stare directly into his eyes. Make a Consum Saving Tho format. I have made a tactical boo-boo. Pretty eyes. Natural one.

You see as Conrad leaps forward, as Bear Toll, as the basilist rears back, and hisses from getting blasted by the firebolt. What did you get for your Flexer Ecobatics, 17? 17. You are able to scoop up. You almost tackle Armin Zakarius and drag him away, very briefly seeing the bloody remains

of the rest of his squad. Oh my God. Or the crumbled remains. As you see Conrad leap, and he actually, he's too strong. His jump is too strong. as he leaps over and he overshoots it and you see in a flash of blue

almost instantly Conrad petrifies and you see him crash into the stone ground and immediately explode. Not a countless and as Bear Tult however is able to grab Armin and start

as the basilis is starting to gain its composure again. Firing off these these firebolts with Sasha, I will yell over my shoulder. Beryl. Make sure that he's in safety. And then begin to help us attack. We need to kill this thing and make it to the finish line. And there's a single tear that rolled down my cheek as I think of poor Conrad as his

shattered in pieces off to the left. How close am I of this Basil? You're very close. So I think that you're going to need to make, actually, I'm going to roll to see if it can get an attack on you. As you have Armin now. This is not going. This is not going well. Connie, no!

Another 13. To attack? Yeah. We have made armor. Don't forget we have made to armor. I know. It's 13, that hits. Yep.

What? Can I like put Armin in the way of the attack? Is that possible? Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. Desperate times. No.

I was gonna turn and just like literally just like, literally just like using the shield. Yeah, I would say you are able to do it, but you need to look into the baseless side to do it. And so I think you turn around and I need you to make a

concerted same thing for me. It looks like a good number. I can never read those dice. 14. 14. You hear Armin say, oh no, the band of cloth. The basilist tears into Armin's throat.

You are coated in blood instantly. As half of his body petrifies, the rest, the basilis tears into Bertolt. With that distraction and with the firebolts from Sasha and Felix, you are able to scramble, completely covered in Armin's blood, as you join the group, as you see now as the basilisk is very much focused

on eating Armin. What are the three survivors? What do you do? We gotta go! We gotta go! Get a hold of yourself! But Berthold's right! There's nothing more we can do here. We have to get away.

We have to get out of here! Conrad! And I will begin to lead us away, because seeing that there's no one left to save. Yep. And we like, and we zigzag? You sprint and the bastard lets turns to you for a second. And being, it starts to you,

to chase after you, but then it's too distracted by the fresh kill. Not to mention the scrumptious morsel of Conrad as well, the rocky all over the floor. As you sprint to the end, and you have to leap over a subterranean river. You hear a waterfall. There are no more basilis. As you see now, the iron gates, and you sprint through all three of you, stumble for them with a rattling smash. The gate closes behind you.

As the lights flood down, magically illuminated, as you see the instructor, and he surveys you, and you see that there's a separate tunnel off on the other side of this circular chamber with the different military instructors and the various wizards, as they're all staring down, the gate closes on the other side where the other squad

had been. And there are no survivors of that squad. The three of you emerge and the instructor looks at you and says,

Ackerman, you stopped to save trainee Zakarius. Sir, yes, sir, that got one of your squad killed. I'm sorry, sir. You were lucky that they

failed so holy that you survived. Hopefully that will teach you a lesson about stopping to save the week. Sir, yes, sir. Are we still Talongard? You're still on the track for

Talongard. Congratulations. Thank you, Phil. You've passed this trial. Thank you, Felix. I just start sobbing. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of Evantris and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas, shroud over salt marsh. You can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your

own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tone for Dungeons and Dragons fifth edition. And don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you. Yeah. We kind of did it. I'm sorry, guys. I couldn't save Conrad.

It's fine. I mean, he was a noble sacrifice, and he saved our lives, I think. He saved my life. We could have... So did you, Felix. We couldn't have done that without you. No.

You're a leader. We couldn't have done it without any one of us. We were a team. And like I said, The trust is what's important. Damn it! Poor Aramon, getting caught by the basilids. As at this point, as the medics come down,

they descend on very zinged-looking discs, because that's cool, because they descend, and they take you up, and although you, although Felix had made a mistake, you get reprimanded by the instructor, but you were not disqualified from Talen Guard. And you think back to Bertolt and Sasha, who both made it to the Talen Guard and were part of your squad until you defected. And you have no idea what happened to them. But as soon as the medics descend, joining them, is a raven that flies over your head and flies over to the wall and taps on the side of the stone and it shatters like glass.

As you see once again, the looming fortress that feels closer, that land of black and white, the hundreds of thousands of ravens, that then you can see through the glass, it swirls all around your reality breaks, and the raven flies around your head, Caprice. And it flies, forward and the glass

fits back together and you hear the murmuring of voices. Conrad died as he lived. Dumb as a rock. I do have a question out of character. Did our, did my friends experience that?

Or were they strictly stand-ins in that instance? Oh yeah, that's a good way. Does Felix have any way to know that they saw these visions? I would say you have no way to know right now. At this point, you, the three of you almost experienced like a dream. If you were like a dream where you were kind of like a different person

and you experienced and you acted how they did, but you still experience the whole thing. You look at a passenger. You're a passenger in that. And I'll just pull back to the day all really kind of channeling. the power of Felix's memory was able to affect your mind and able to put you into these people that had existed. So Caprice has some sense of what it was like to be a passenger in Conrad, but it wasn't influencing Conrad's behavior because this already happened.

Yes, exactly. Exactly. Walk right. Thank you for clarifying. You're welcome. You hear the murmurs of voices as you see. as you see beautiful flowers draped around a very plush, upholstery, large dining table with white tablecloths, great feasts, a dance floor, individuals, humanoid of all varieties, dressed absolutely impeccably.

As you look around and you seem to be in a place that can only be Gultaicca. As you seem to be at the starting of what is a wedding reception, as you see tables around waiters are coming in and out of a kitchen, as... Okay, let me pull this up real quick. I lost my notes, I apologize. You look up and you see that there is a... By the entrance of this restaurant, it seems to be very nice. There's a carving.

Oh, God. Near the entrance, and it's also like a stained glass window. And it seems to be a creature that's made from a chicken cutlet body. Meatball eyes. Fried cheese let spaghetti arms and legs. Weings also fried cheese. As you see the lettering, you are in the original location of Gosponjo's ivory Italian restaurant in the heart of Galtica. You know what?

I am so scared to open the piece of paper. You, Caprice, you are dressed to the nines. you have your fiddle, your violin in your case. This is a gig you've been waiting for for a long time, and one that you had to try very hard to get. It is the wedding after party of the daughter of Don Genovessi. Oh, no. The, his daughter, Mofaleta, has just been married at the church.

I do it. And the guests are starting to enter. It's, you know, a cocktail hour, and you see that there is like a little fountain where they have punch, and you see that same mascot, the very famous mascot of Gisbache's ivory Italian restaurant, and where guests are coming in,

they're dressed very well. You see the, you see the father, of the bride, a very well-dressed, a plump human man. As he's welcoming everyone, giving them a kiss on the cheek, patting them on the back. He's got a ring on every finger, and the suit, and despite how well off your family is,

the suit that he's wearing is probably worth more than everything that you've spent, you know, your entire adult life. And- What is his name? Don Genovesi. Genevessi. And we've seen him in the...

I believe so. You have seen him in a dream. Right. Where we were going to do a heist for him. Yeah. Wow. You also see that the guards, that there are dozens of guards, stationed at every single doorway, an entrance.

And that makes you think of why you're actually here, Capri's. of Greece. You were promised information to find a library of dark secrets, black magics, of the underground, from the Gallimardo crime family. You agreed to take that on. And when Don Dinovese said that the ancestor of Massimo de Sesto, his favorite musician of all time, would personally perform at his daughter's wedding. It was a no-brainer. And you have arrived and you

are almost finished setting up with your band. Please open your character name and B. I have a B. Oh yeah, you have a B. Should I open my B? Yeah. It's very, very informative. Yeah, not very

exciting when you're the center. Oh, my God. You see, as you're setting up, and the rest of the band is setting up their instruments as they're figuring out their characters a little bit, you see the father of the bride as Don Gina Vessi walks up to you, and he says, Capricio, my boy,

I just want to thank you for performing on this the day of my daughter's wedding. I bow very, very deeply. It's my pleasure. Best wishes to you and your lovely daughter, the bride. The look on her face when I told her that I got a decessone to perform at this beautiful reception, isn't this beautiful? Isn't it beautiful Capri? Yeah, it's gorgeous.

I mean, it's the finest place you could choose for such a beautiful day. And just look at the mascot. It's beautiful. There's no better place in the whole city than just bunch of ivory talian. are perfect. You're gonna love it. We're gonna, we're gonna, we're gonna, the gang and I, we're gonna, we're gonna,

we're gonna do, straight to the nights. Well, I appreciate it. If you need anything, I'll make sure that the chefs have a hot meal ready for you at the end of the night. If you need anything, please, happy to, if you have any requests or, you know, slow, fast, you name it.

Well, I got a request, can we get this fucking heist on the road? I mean, gig on the road. Hey, wait, wait, we're gonna, wait, we're gonna, just hold on, excuse my friend, what, Rhonda, hi. Oh, hello, Ron.

Rhonda was it? I'm a little halfling with really, like, a little half-ling with really, like, teased out dark hair. So why don't you describe? So that's, what are you playing? I am playing a stand-up bass. So I'm setting up my stool so that I can reach the neck of my base. That's awesome. It is, despite my small stature, I am playing a full-size one.

Sorry. That's right. Sweetie, I'm very excited to watch you play that instrument. Oh, honey, you're going to love it. Oh, I know I will. And he's like blinking. I'm going to get in trouble. I got to go.

As he turns and you see as the door to the back in the kitchen opens and you see a very large loxidon stirring something as he looks and he gives a wave to the dawn and then goes back in. And you know, as your band is getting ready, that it's your job to basically get lower the defenses of this party in whatever way you deem appropriate. And you know what the Gallo Mardo crime family is attempting to do here. And how about the rest of the band introduce themselves? I'm happy to go next. My name's Vinnie Polino.

I'm obviously your trumpet player. I wasn't your first pick because I'm a little unhinged and you know it. And I'm a little bit of a wild guard. You know, all I'm saying is I know that this is a wedding, but I got a little taste for muffaletta, if you know what I mean. That's a bit of Vinnie. Vinny, you better not touch that girl. Well, I never said I was going to touch her.

I'm just saying I like the taste of a good muffoletta. Jeez. Also, I... We're going to get fired. I had a moment with Gina Vessi, and, you know, he said something about giving me the kiss of death, but he was using a little tongue. That happened.

You want to show me how he did it. Oh, naughty. Maybe later. Well, I'm... I mean, what do you look like, though? Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to mention that I'm just... I'm a regular old human. It's weird. I don't fit in here. It's like, oh, what are you doing?

You're just a human? Falling on odd times. You know, but all I can do is play this trumpet. I'm also a little unhinged. I knew a guy once who told me to, like, you know, paint it instead of just saying it, but it's hard not to say it. Well, I'm Benny Duganelli.

And, you know, I'm an 800-pound loxanime. Fuck. And, you know, I have a talent for, you know, tickling the old ivory. It's a little insensitive for a locks and I play the piano. But, you know, I sort of wanted to act out against my mom. And I just learned anyway. Are we sure that's not a euphemism, but something else? Oh, I mean, it might be. I wouldn't know.

You've just got elephant, like, feet, right? Mom! Mom! I know, I know. I know. You know, and I have an extra appendage to play with, too, so it gives me an unfair advantage. That's definitely euphemism, if I've ever heard one. Some say two, too, I'm just, yeah. Well, we've got to set up.

You don't need anything before we hit the stage? I could use a drink. And maybe a little giggle water. Just take it easy, all right? We got to, we gotta get up there. We gotta get a great performance, understand? When have we ever not given a great performance? Well, but we need them to be tranced, enchanted.

I am tones, I am ready. Look, and my string breaks, I'm like, how fuck. I mean, Vinny's pretty unhinged. He's moving a lot, and performances for how unhinged he is. I'm gonna keep an eye on you, Vinny. This is gonna open us up to a whole new world of musicianship, I promise. I promise. It's so just one fucking handy.

He just soles for like 38 minutes. I guess, you know, I get it. This is jazz. But still, it's ridiculous. It's called autistic expression, all right? Benny. Look, Benny. I'm not trying to fight here.

I'm just saying that sometimes the rest of us could use a solo. I'll see about it. No promises. Thank you, Zimmy, for the follow. Yay! So much appreciate it. Thank you. Twitter Discord.

We love having you here. And so... I lead the gang up to the... stage. Yeah, so the stage is there. You see now as everyone let out a big cheer, as Ron was able to restring her bass, everyone is cheering as the bride and the groom walk in, and they are very much ecstatic, and they make an abs, they make a beeline to the drink table as they start to enjoy themselves. And you see that Don as he embraces his daughter and his now son-in-law. As the couple walks past the stage towards wherever they're going, I'm going to lean in towards

Caprice and I'm going to say, ha-ha, love grows where my muffa letta goes. Quiet, we're trying. Stop. That's disgusting. You're disgusting. We literally can't take you anyway. Save it for later, though. God. Lock it up. Lock it up, Vinny. All right, what are we starting with? Well, I think we should start with some of the classics, and then, you know, actually, we need to make sure that we're doing something if they're going to do the first dance,

or if they're, what's the fucking set list? Do you not prepare this? I've got, I've got the new stuff. I've got the new stuff, all right? The new stuff, what do you mean? Well, you just, I'm going to hand you, I wrote a bunch of new music. music last night. It's a different chord progression.

All right. What's the one of the chords? Caprice. Caprice, I feel my hinges. I feel them. You're really testing me here. You're gonna be great. You're gonna be great. You're gonna have a nice long solo once everyone's up and jumping. All right, all right. I'm trusting you here. All right. I walk. I don't trust him at all. I don't trust him at all. Very quickly, I walk everyone through a, uh, uh, uh, uh, chord progression for three or four initial songs and then after that there's the the classics that were that we know B minor that we would yeah after that it would be like

things that were obvious and then at the very bottom would be like if we have to by great great great great great grandfather stuff all right so like take my sheet like and stroke on the ground and I put my shodding like chord progression notes up on the piano and I'll sit down. And it creaked. Hey everybody. Welcome to a beautiful wedding, a beautiful day. We hope that you are enjoying the food.

We hope that you're enjoying the drink. We are half-ling to Giant and we are enjoy the show. One, two, one, two, three, four. And we start. So it's beautiful music. There's a swing in town I know called, Galtica City

There's a people stop and scream Hello in Galctica City It's the kind of place that makes a bum feel like a king It's the kind of place that makes a king Feel like some super kuku Crazy King

The audience is like, oh my God, he's a genius How are these lyrics Have you ever heard anything like this? Whose music is that? That would be an original I'm starting with the stuff that I wrote So it would be like new And I'm sure it's fine, but no one in the audience would know them.

Yeah, and then they kind of ignore you, and then you play that kind of stuff. They're not buying it. And then you hear voice call out, and this has probably been like an hour's past, and you're just playing that kind of stuff that Caprice has written. And the Dom kind of shouts up, and he's very much had probably several pints of wine at this point. and he calls out Play Massimo de Sesto! Play Massimo!

Play Massimo! He's asking for Massimo! I don't really think we can say no, God. He's a greatest musician of all time. I read a lot of documents about... I saw a lot of stuff and documents about his life. He's a great... He's a great Galtican. Anything for you, Don. No problem.

Yeah, yeah, ah, uh... Let's do Fly Me to the Moon, all right? All right, you sure? Yeah. We're going to do what they want. We just got to get through it. We just got to get through it. All right.

One, two, three, four. Fly me to the moon and let me play among the stars. Show me spring in Yonah or the winters of Dracar. On other words, hold my hand. In other words, darling, kiss me. Fill my heart And we continue Love it! Love it! So good!

Make a performance check. Oh! I had advantage because your band is assisting you. Thank you. Knows, I love Neon Genesis. You band, Yel-A-L-A-O. Me too, no. Yeah, I only sing that version of that song because it's just such a fucking great cover. Performance, eh?

At my current... At my... That age level? I'll just tell you, I... I posted the stat block, but I can tell you right now. Oh, I didn't. Performance is plus six. Plus six.

Oh, that'll be 22. 22. Immediately the gang, the party finally starts happening. People start going on the dance floor. They're having a good time. As you get a sense that this is what they hired you to do. As you see that the guards are still on high alert, you see them tapping their feet and nodding along

at every entrance in this place. So what are you trying to do? I'm starting to get them to come up and, okay, we gotta play, I catch your one, I catch your one. How about that's life? All right, something a little more up, be, I like it. Yeah, you got it.

Take the lead. One, a two, a one, two, that's life. You're living it right now. I don't know the rest of the lyrics that song. But we- He goes on and crawl. And at a certain point, I imagine that we would have a slow song and we would sing, Summer Breeze Guns blowing in.

And I'm winking at the guards when we're playing this one. The more I can get the crowd to get up from their table and either just be watching or something like that. Anything that I can do to get eyes on us, I am attempting to do as much as possible. And as much as I can leverage the three of you to be in Winky. to do a dramatic solo up on the top of the piano. Three fingers with appendages all aligned. I am really trying to please this audience

to the best of my ability. Okay, I will say, Rhonda make a charisma check, we'll say persuasion check, which will be at plus. Two? Yeah, plus two, yeah. Makes to follow, Jero. Even the follow.

Terrible. Six. Six. As you see some of the guards towards the entrances looking at you, you see now that there were actually two guards at the buffet table and the food table and the drink table, but they seem to have been gone. They're now gone, but the ones at the entrances are still there. Can I say that I go to wink at one, but my eyelash glue sticks to my lower lid and I can't get it back over.

Yeah, exactly. No, it's tough. And you're like, oh, you almost fall off your stool as you're playing the... Damn it. I need to look up more Frank Sinatra songs. So what are the rest of you doing? I'm just following, I mean, I just keep playing until this is over. In between every single, like, song that we do,

I'm flagging a cocktail waitress for another drink. I'm getting kind of loaded. Oh, yeah, you're absolutely loaded. Caprice is definitely getting a little worried. Oh, yeah. My trumpet cells are getting a little sloppier a little longer. Oh, yeah. That's not good.

I was very clearly not his first pick for Trump. Take it easy, all right? We're doing great, but... Do it? Yeah, all right. All right. Empty the spitfowl, for the love of God. I like, I like empty it on Benny's shoe.

Ew! You're disgusting. I'm sorry. I was a... He was an accident. I really didn't mean to. I meant to. Keep it together, you guys.

We got to make this work, all right? and then you just tell us with the play I mean I'm just here I am I'm just trying to you know, read your fucking core progressions and you haven't told them the plan yet or like you said that you would have them then that's all I would say that

no I don't know if I would share that I think that I would tell them that it would be a portal to future wedding gigs or I would try to put it onto my shoulders as much as possible but I am as much as I can trying to decide we need to get the the everyone everyone in the place to be looking at us to be keeping to be paying attention to us

well yeah that's the point of a band we get it surely you have one of your great great great great great grandfather's songs in your back pocket that we can use to really just bring the room together yeah surely surely right just like on the piano there's a pleading a lot yeah that my trunk You know, where'd that come from? Oh, I wanted it between songs. All right. Let's try,

uh, uh, luck be a lady. All right. Oh, I love that one. Luck be a lady tonight. Luck be a lady tonight.

If you're not feeling lucky, ask for the ladies. Luck be a lady tonight. Well, Benny on backup. I like it. I, um, and either missing the prompt or I am doing my best to continue to try and get everyone to pay attention to us as much as possible so that whatever needs to happen happens.

I would say that you get the sense that you're going to have to be a little bit more crafty as these guards are paid. The guards are stationed there and they are starting to get a little bit more. They're getting into it. I'll say make a performance take advantage. Okay. Spells. that'll be at 23. 23. I would say that they're starting to get a little bit distracted.

They're really loving the musical selection. As an aside, you would know that Vinnie, part of the reason that you both like and despise Vinny, would be that you know that if Vinny gets drunk enough, he'll do almost anything you say. And you feel like you have that in your back pocket. And you would know that Benny is very known for hacking into places. And by hacking, I mean, he has a hatchet in the trunk of his car that he uses to, you know, chop doors down.

He can also just break him down with the shoulder, too. So, you know, you would know that that would be a special skill that he would have been an 800-pound locksabon. We perform another version of, don't rain on my parade. and at the conclusion of it, I lean over to Vinnie, who I can see is now very sauced. What's up, boss? Did you feel like Benny was really stepping on your solo to that?

I feel like I love you a little bit. Benny, that bastard, he's always stepping on my solos. Everybody is, even you. I didn't mean that you pay my paychecks. I feel like you should probably go talk to him. And if he doesn't understand what you're talking about, then you should just give him one, just to make sure that we are all in sync as a band.

Are you telling me that he was talking about me behind my back? Ah, well, let me tell you what for. He may weigh 800 pounds, but I weigh about 183. So I'm going to go talk to him right now. Right now, boss? Right now? Ready? Buddy!

Jeez, are you unhinged now? You haven't even begun to see unhinged, my friend. I have been good authority that you were stepping on my solo and also talking shit behind my back. What kind of shit would I be talking about? Before he's even finished, I punch him right in the face. You know what you're doing, you bastard! I'm on here!

I rip my shirt off and I throw myself on Benny, but he basically doesn't move. I turn and I wrap my trunk around his neck and just lift him up off the ground. I'm foiling. We need help. We need help. We need help.

Bestad. I even said a word behind you there. Every time, every time with you too. I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll fade all your face. And you know I do, you're fucking unhinged, you crazy. They're gonna ruin this gig.

I take him to turn and I just punch him. Let him go and just set him flying. I just sailing off. That's why. Existage left. You see as Vinny lands onto the dessert table, they haven't cut the cake yet. Oh, no.

The cake is splattered. All of the desserts. There's very much a Wilhelm screen. As I got to punch in the air. Vennie is covered in. scalding coffee is prospective me. As I would say with that, make a persuasion check in advantage plus plus two.

A strong 14, I would say given the commotion, you see that Don get up and he is also sloshed. As he said, look the fuck am I paying you for. Keep playing. He goes over to Timmany and grabs him by the scrub and punches them in. You get back up on that fucking stage and play bird what is free. Put me down.

Play ball one is free. You've got you ruined my canoles. You son of a bad day of my daughter's wedding. It's fine. New canolies. I'll get on stage. I'll get on stage. And at this point, guards start rushing in.

as they start to grab Vinny and they're starting to swarm around Benny as the guards are approaching me I'm wielding my trumpet back back you'll never take me alive I sit out of the piano and I just try to ignore the guards and like just sit and not move it if they're trying to like move me and I play the piano intro to bird what is free you're questioning I'm playing along with my fellow As all the guards turn towards Vinny, as he's making enough of a scene, make an intimidation check at advantage. All right, stay back, you bastards.

I'm unhinged. I'm unhinged, didn't you hear me? I would say, Caprice, you now notice that the entrances seem to be unguarded, and you know that the soldiers from the Gallimardo family are waiting for the signal. What is it? Charisma? Yeah, it's charisma.

So plus two. I got a nine. So I'm a little more intimidating, the average commoner, but only because I'm so drunk and raving. It's not really scary. It's just like this guy's a little unhinged. So you see that these very heavily armed guards approach you.

And because of how just incredibly unhinged you are, and you're swinging the trumpet, and they're like, oh, boss, he's got a trumpet. I don't know what to do. As that's happening. And Vinny's making a really great distraction. And the dawn, he's really pissed. but as soon as he hears the piano intro to Birdwood is free

he immediately like, yes, Birdwood is free! Birdwood is free! And he grabs a handful of just smashed canoli and he just shoves it in his mouth. Quick change of plans, guys. Okay, and I double-checked that the guards are totally involved. Quick change the plans. I know Birdwood is free.

Excellent, but... Are you kidding? The song's more used up than I am. Don't. We're doing the classic Massimo song. That's impossible, Rhomba. One, two. A little something different, everyone.

You've all been waiting for it. It's the Massimo classic. Send in the clowns. Oh no. Send in the clowns. You gotta get in here right now, right now because it's fine as in the clowns. As soon as you say send in the clowns,

you see as the Don Gita Vesey, his face is covered in canole and spilled wine from just the commotion. And he's like, wait a minute, I want to burn what is as as a crossbow bowl flies through his throat, as the doors are all kicked in and smashed in. And it is an absolute hellfire of bolts as armed thugs with heavy crossbows, well-dressed, seemingly addresses party guests and staff.

And you see actually the Loxidon burst out of the kitchen with a heavy crossbow and start firing him. You see that the bolts as all of the guards the entire family of the dawn you see that the soldiers, the enforcers are all taking hits. There's a

operatic performance of Ave Maria going on right now. And who are you? As it is absolute fucking carnage and this all just happens. What are you all doing as you see as you are not expecting this.

Holy shit! I'm gonna jump down from my stool and jump into my base case and just like claim shell-a-shot. I will jump first underneath the piano and then realizing that I'm still exposed because there's a fucking under the piano, I would immediately crawl up

and try to get into the actual where the strings of the piano are between the sandwich of the top of it, if it's one of those grand piano style, I'll slide in there and just like, keep my eyes shut and cover my ears. I'm probably turned to Swiss cheese.

I mean, I'm like down in the thick of it. Why don't you make... How far am I from Vinnie? So, I mean, you punched him. The dessert table was relatively close to the stage. You had to go across the stage, and the dawn was right next to Vinny at the canoli's, the canoli paste.

As the young Vinny. first and the dawn has just gone down. Caprice is scrambling to save himself. Rhonda, make a quick athletics or acrobatics check at advantage, and we'll say that's plus four. Acrobatics, yeah. Yeah, to see how quickly you can get into your case. Ooh, 13. 13. The DC was 12. You're able to do that, and right as a bolt pierces the entire stock off of the base. Oh, shit. But you are able to barely get. in your case as it starts firing. I'll just say, that on Hinch, fuck, is gonna get himself killed!

And I'm gonna jump off the stage, and I'm gonna try to like put my tusks down and just charge and try to grab him and then like turn and charge through some doors to get out of the room. Okay. I would say make, if you're not resisting. Oh no, I'm drunk and just terrified

and there's bolts just flying all over the place. Yeah. I would basically be like in the fetal position like praying. There's wood splintering everywhere. Wintering everywhere. Yeah. Yeah. I don't even know where I am.

Yeah, I would say make an athletics or acrobatics check. Blee plus four. Oh, no. You are able to twist these things if you want. I'm twisting this. All right. There we go. 18.

Nice. 18. I would say with- No, no, sorry. It could be acrobatics. Yep. 20. Nice.

I would say you are able to put your head down and write as a bolt. is flying straight at Vinny. These soldiers of the Gallimardo family don't care about the bards that came in to do the job. They just care that they're hitting their targets. And you are able to scoop up Vinny

with your trunks and wrap your tusk and wrap your trunk around him and you smash through a wooden door and just burst out of gazpachos as you sprint. And you see now as you make your way out into the hallway and the street past

these goons seeing the carnage around you you see Muffoletta fall to the ground, her vacant eyes almost staring at you as blood pools around the ground as...

It's got dark as... As... Imagine a few bolts actually do hit the surface of the piano. Oh yeah, no, it's splintering. You're dodging and then the quiet returns as the soldiers from the family start walking around to survey. And it's with that, as you see the pooling blood from this red wedding, you see the flapping of wings as, or hear the flapping of wings as a raven lands and pecks the side of the piano, shattering all of reality.

all of reality around you as it swirls everywhere and you then you Toha feel I guess Benny as you're running with Vinny who's clutching his trumpet to grab my ex

and I'm gonna lay him in the wagon and I'm running back inside to help him to be out my mom's wagon actually no it's Vini's wagon actually I'm proficient in vehicles, whatever that means. The raven flies around your head and you see once again as the reality shatters around you like glass. You see that massive fortress.

It's getting closer. And then it slops back together and reality shifts again as you feel. Cool sea air. Sea breeze hits your skin as you. feel the cool sea air, you smell the salt, you hear the very gentle lapping of water. As a tiny bit of sun, single beam of light enters a large, picturesque cove. Peaceful water sheltered from any... rough seas or rough winds as stay in a group of you staring up at a number of shipwrecks as

or some ships that had just dilapidated with age this is a cove that has been safe harbor to a number of ships but oftentimes it's once you get in, it's difficult to get out. And so many vessels have gone into this cove to escape a storm and never left. And sometimes carrying great cargo and treasure. And on one of these islands in the McCona Island chain, this place has been called by locals Treasure Trove Cove. as you know that many people don't even bother to loop through these wreckages, this fabled treasure,

because it is difficult to get to. You just scale a mountain and then go through the hole at the top, and then getting back out is difficult, or you have to swim a long way. There are sharks in the water, and it's not entirely safe. But once you're in, it is picturesque. as, and there's also been terrible murmurs about this place, about creatures potentially lurking within. And however, there are a number of you standing, looking up, following up after an idea that Toa, a young Toa, a teenager, whatever age this might be, stares up at one particular shipwreck. And after hearing stories that had been passed down for generations about a famous pirate

that they would call Glitterbeard, had so many gems and jewels in his pirate hoard of treasure that he earned a name for. But the treasure had never been found, especially no one on his island. And so Toa decided after telling a great story about it, around a campfire, rallied some friends to seek out this treasure of glittered beard, not really for the riches, but just for the fun of it. And why don't you all open up your packages of C?

Character name C. Yep. You are yourself. Yep. Oh, I'm so excited to go on a treasure hunt. Oh, what a fun activity. Thanks for coming with me, guys. Hey, man.

Oh, this was a great idea, man. I'm very excited as well. Oh, good. Wow. It's nice... Hello. You know me. I'm your good friend, Kai.

Hey, Kai. Thanks for coming. What are you doing? I'm just happy to be here. I'm a... I'm a Connie Island Goliath. I would say I'm not as tall as you, though. But I'm still built.

But I'm... You're tall. I'm not that tall. I'm just happy to be invited. Oh, well, I'm glad that you accepted my invitation and that it sounded cool enough to kind of, you know, want to do and take your afternoon to do it. I know there's a lot of things you could be doing with your afternoon

like fishing or relaxing or sleeping or eating or sunbathing or swimming. I mean, lots of things. There's really lots of options. To be honest, I'm also hoping that we get to do some of those things along the way. Me too. Maybe we should take a nap right now. Oh, I mean, we just kind of started, I mean, we just left. Like, we were just napping. We just got up.

It's true. What about second nap? You know Keanu likes to nap. Oh, that would explain your accent then, man. I'm a big fan of naps, you know, man. It's cool. I'm with you guys. I'm ready for an adventure. Yeah, that's exactly right.

What's your name? I know it, but I just want testing you. Oh, you? Malia. Malia? Oh. It's so great car, Malia and Kianu. Kiano?

Kianu, yeah. Kianu. Yeah. Is in like that bus movie? I think it means to nap. Oh, to nap. It's like a verb. Teneb.

Yeah. Oh, your name. Tannap. Yeah. Ooh, that's a good nickname. We're going to call you to nap. No, you can just call me. piano, man, because that's my name.

Alright, to nap, let's go. Enough we can nap later. All right. Anyway, I have a treasure map. A co. Yes, and it's of treasure trove coat. Do I have treasure map? Yeah, sure, sure.

Oh, a treasure map. Did you draw this? This is so well done. No, I bought it from the treasure map store. I've heard of this code before. I'm very excited to God, never been. Yeah, they were selling treasure maps, and they're like, oh, here's one of, he's a treasure map. And they sold it to me for barely anything.

It was a great deal. I haggled quite a bit to get it. What? Is that rude if I asked what you paid? I paid like, I don't know, like two fish. Wow. That's kind of a deal. That's like two fish. And I'm like, hey, you want these two fish for that treasure map? And he's like, sure. I know. I'm a very intense hangler. I know it was supposed to be going on an adventure, but I was hoping that maybe you'd bring along your fishing tackle.

I know you've had it ever since you were a kid, and I hope that you never lose it. Yeah. I do like the hundred yards. That's the best fucking fishing tackle, man. You know what they say? You can teach a man to fish, and, you know,

it'll lead for the rest of his life. Internal towers. So just, don't ever lose your tackle. Don't ever lose your tackle. Exactly right. It's the end of the same. No, everybody forgets that part. Yeah, don't lose your tackle.

Never lose it. It's very special. No, I would never lose it. And I certainly would never give it away as part of a ritual to save, the world to prevent the apocalypse or anything. That's all the specific, but I appreciate the... I definitely would never do that.

Optimism, all right. I feel like if you took it, like, gave it away, that would be like the end of the world. Yeah, it would be like a metaphorical end of the world. But I don't know what a metaphor is yet. I'll probably learn later. Men, that really hurts my head. Um, um... Anyway, so I have a treasure map.

Look, these treasure trove coves. And then there's a big X on it. Is that where we are? No, no, well, I don't think so. I thought the X was where the treasure is, but maybe the X marks where you are. I mean, that sounds right? Let's test it. It come with instructions.

We're going to, like, move 10 feet, and I want to see if the X moves on the treasured. I does not. Does the X have, like, an end at the top? Is that, like, a compass? I mean, well, there's a different pointy thing at the bottom, left-hand corner with an N at the top. Isn't that kind of like an X though if you like? Oh, you're right. He's like an X.

There are two X's. Do you mind? That's probably what... Oh, I can't read. Oh, well... I never learned to read. I don't know. I can't read it.

Are there any words on this map? Is it just pictures? It's just pictures. But anyway, we're going to find this treasure, and I'm pretty sure that's... the treasure. Right. And there's some trees.

And here's some water and some shipwreck and some coconuts maybe in this, I don't know, kind of like a bug? Or was it like an us a lot? I'm not sure. Go be a bug. Yeah. I don't know.

Maybe it's just a rock. It might be like a weird-shaped rock. I'm just happy to be on. All right, well, um, follow me. All right. And I'm just going to walk through the jungle towards Treasure Trove Cove Cove. Yeah, so you see Treasure Trove Cove, Cove, and I'll say that you spend the day scaling the large rock formation, and then you had to drop a rope down and spalunk down.

You leave it hanging, and you see the several, a dozen shipwrecks, at least, some very ancient, little more than just driftwood at this point. But you see the one where this treasure map has been leading to the glitter galleon, the Glitterbeard's flagship, allegedly. And you see that the mass has been split in two of this wrecked galley. And you see that there's a large hole in the hole. And it's beached on the side of the cove. And the mass is split and leaning up against wedged in a little crevice. in this cove as you and as the the water in this cove is pristine it's just a very faint lapping of just like tiny tiny things I just want to say before we go any further that I'm glad that you're the leader because you're the smartest one out of all of us

you always have been our whole lives thank you for saying me you mean car cario I mean just just kai just kai just kai you've known me for like 16 years now oh wow it's a long time it is I don't really keep track of time, you know, it's not really relevant. Oh. You know what I mean? Wow. All right. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah. I'm kind of like what I'm getting from here, you know? Sort of like, you know, because there's a bit of booker in there kind of like. It's because I'm really bad at his accent and now you're going to post me anyway. All right. I think you're doing really well. Now I'm all fucked up in my head.

Tell me what are you done! You broke me! I like it. It's sort of like a Kiwi Booker. I'm just picturing what you would be like as like D'Landie. Like what that would be like living with. He's a normal Andy at that point. Oh, so anyway, that shipwreck is right here on the map.

It kind of looks like a fish. Right. We look it in there. Well, we have to, I guess we have to like go to it. I mean, are we inside like a... like a cave? Yeah, it's kind of like a cave. It's a sheltered cove.

Okay. It's like, it's like, and there's one waterway out into the sea, and so it's, you're able to get to it from the island side, but you need to climb and then slump down into the whole, where like there's basically a single beam of light that gets in. So are we, so we see it, we're not there yet. No, you're in there. So basically your sea, stay up at the ship, the wreck of the ship. Yeah.

So this is it. Alright, well I'm gonna look at the map and I think try to get my bearings here and I'm pretty sure Sometimes it's helpful if you put it on the ground and then stand on the map so it's like you're in the map Oh, that's a great idea. Okay, here we go. I'm gonna put it on the ground I'm gonna say stop mapping. What are you doing? We're on an adventure Sorry, man, I'm sorry. It's cool. We get the whole party here if it wasn't so difficult to get to We could probably still throw a pretty nice party here. It's very nice. I like the ambiance.

It's a good, it is a good ambiance. So, anyway, I'm going to try to look to see, I think the treasures are that way. And I'm going to, like, where I think the X is, I'm just going to try to go that way. Yeah, you see the X is where, basically, it's on this ship. And so you've arrived and you think you're not sure where in the ship it is. Oh, never mind. We're here. It's somewhere where in this ship.

Let's Take a look Should we swim over to the ship? Yeah, I mean, we should go Is the ship like beached fully Or is it still like It's beached basically I was picturing like the Goonies

Like the final movie of the game? It's not quite like that It's kind of like the Goonies But it's basically been Some of the water does go up to it And like car of the hole is submerged But it's obviously up against the side of the cove Lilted the mass is snapped

All right Be careful It might be dangerous Some of the wood might be rotten. Benici so far. So, anyway, just follow me. You find that treasure. If anyone needs to learn how to swim, I can teach you.

That's what I do. I teach people how to swim. People can't swim. I could maybe use a refresher. You just got to get in the water, like... Like this? I'll show you. And I jump in and I start swimming towards the ship.

I like already in the ship looking around for treasure. I'm just standing on the beach kind of dancing like I'm swimming. No, you got to do it in the water. It's kind of good up here, too. Making an investigation check with the stats that I sent over in Discord. I can tell you. Oh, Ben. Yeah, so stats.

I'm sure it's a six. Tribal. Minus one. Five. Oh, my God. We're all doing a swimming? No, no. He's doing it advantage because you're assisting him.

Okay, man. Oh, it didn't a job? My bed. My, I don't have to practice my Kiwi very much. It's not the best. That's why I didn't pick him. I'm trying to channel my inner Reese Derby. It's not going very well.

It's a 17. I'm trying to be what's her days from a... Birdie. Birdie. Who is also in our flag means death. So... Oh, I don't need to roll. Never mind.

I got a 17. I like what it does to your face. I have to talk from my nose. You scale the side of this ship and your foot. and your foot, actually, you're very heavy, as your foot smashes through the rotting wood as you scale, and you make your way to the deck as I thought. Are you all right?

Yes, I'm just walking on the ship. I'm trying to get the rest of you to help, but you're all trying to swim. Well, I just... And the swimming isn't part of the adventure. I mean, we could do it afterwards, but it's not part of the adventure. I feel bad.

I'm sorry, I'm coming. I'm coming. And I would just, I would leave the swimming and then I guess swim over to the ship or however, did you have to swim out to the ship to get? No, it's partially beach. So I just walk. Okay, and then I would try to follow.

You can swim that up to it as well. I would try to follow Toa as he is, I can tell that his heart is really in this adventure. And I don't want to let my good friend down. Okay. So I would follow him and attempt to follow his path to scale the ship to catch up to Tela. I too would follow the beach path while still air swimming.

Okay. And start looking around. I would say, you're able to join Toa, and you search the ship and you look, you go to where the captain's quarters are, and you see a couple of skeletons, pirates clutching, murky, long-emptied rum bottles leaning up against the ship, but you find nothing. You go the several decks, but then you see that the bottom part of the ship is completely waterlogged. as the lowest deck has filled with seawater.

And I need a group perception check for me. Check sale. That's a 20. 10. 16. Do we have any plus? No. Just a 10.

19. 20. Natural and dirty. Okay. I would say that with those rolls, you're able to see that despite being waterlogged and the water being very dark, you can see a glint

of something shiny down in that water. I think I see something shiny down there in the water. Is it treasure? I think it might be treasure. I mean, his name was glitter bead, and it's sort of glittering. Now's probably a good time to say that we live in paradise, and certainly absolutely nothing could go wrong,

especially right now, right here. Exactly right. I mean, it's just paradise was surrounded by skeletons. Nothing could possibly go wrong. We're best friends. You're best friends, and we're going to be best friends forever. I love you, Tella. I love you, too, Carl.

I love you guys. Let's all hug. It's nice. Why don't you go check out that glittery family? All right, and without even a second thought, trusting my best friend in the world, Teller, I very quickly and without abandon. Just go to see what the glitter is. You get an investigation ticket disadvantage, minus one. Oh, cool.

He's on like, like, perfect. 17. I disbanded. Oh shit. Six. Six. You see as Kai dives into the water. Some of the wood has splintered in,

so the opening is actually relatively large, but the water is just very gently laughing against that rotting wood. As Kai leaps in, and you swim around it, and it is very dark. The sun is not reaching in here. As you swim around, and you finally see, where the glint is, you were hoping to see a giant pile of treasure or a treasure chest,

but instead you just see a skeleton that is considerably larger than the other skeletons that you'd seen. And you see that it's lying on its back completely submerged and sunken in. And way all around where its head is, you see that there are a number of gold rings. and jewel tips, as if that gold and jewels had been the beard of the skeleton, and then as it decomposed, it sank to the floor, the floor of this holt. And you see where the real treasure, as you see a tattered captain's hat and cloak, as you see the remnants of Captain Glitterbeard. And you see, at least from what you can see, the real treasure of why he was down here,

is the last stores of rum. Well, let me consult my character sheet for one moment here. It says my profession is something McCona Island-related. I'm a professional party. So I want to bring back the rum, for show, and also see if I can grab maybe a piece of jewelry or something to, you know, one under one arm, one piece of jewelry in one hand just to show the rest of the group that there is something down here. And as I go to do this, I think, this is the best day out.

I would say that with that role that although you're not sure how long Captain Glitterbeard had lived, there was so much, so many barrels of rum in this hold that he wasn't able to drink all of it before he died. Wow. You're able to find a cask. and with your Goliath strength, you're able to bring it up, and you find, you know, perhaps a sapphire

or, you know, something to show the group. Uh, I'm gonna, when I surface. Oh, wow. We did it. It's treasure. We found the treasure. There's a lot,

there's a lot more down there where it came from, but I'm doing book out again. It's really, really awful. I can't. I hate this. We can get it. We can get it all.

I like it. you chose your tattoos, you kind of did like a little bandit mass. That's a nice tattoo. That's a difficult accent, man. It's tough. It's tough to stay in it, man. And, wow, I mean, that's great. We found the treasure.

It's nice. But really, the treasure was the fun we had along the way. Wasn't it? Oh, that's nice. Wasn't it pleasant? Very pleasant. You said there's like gems down there, though? Lots of treasure, yeah. I'm going to go get some gems, because business is bad.

I'm going to dive in an attempt to go get some of my own jewels. Making a investigation. Investigation, you say? Double 17, so this is 16. 16, yeah. I would say that you are able to find a good number of jewels.

And it was not immediately apparent, but tied to a bit of leather that looks like it would have been wrapped deep within the beard of this Captain Glitterbeard, you find a silver key. And I will say

that if you, with that, you are able to push aside all of the rum and you find a large barnacle covered chest with a silver lock, if you care, do it. I put together that the key and the lock might go together. There are four minutes of debate, self-debat later, internal debate. You're doing it. And then I open the chest and I attempt to. You do, and you use your strength. It's definitely rusted and barnacle are covering it, but with some strength, you're able to lift it up, and you see the glitter of Captain Glitterbeard's lost treasure. As you see glittering platinum pieces and gold pieces, even the fabled Electrum.

As you see jewels scattered throughout. And jewelry. As you see a verifiable barnacle-covered treasure chest that is your classic stereotypical pirate treasure. I'll close it, lock it, put it under my arm, and swim back to the group. Yeah. It was people to do that.

Yeah, yeah. It's not like... It's incredible that no one's found this before us. How is it possible? I don't know, maybe they didn't know how to swim. They should take my class. Fair enough? Or maybe they're all these skeletons. Everyone who's ever come to find it.

Could be. I mean, you never know who your skeletons are. Wow, look at this treasure. We should go through it on the beach. Totally. Here. This is great. I hope there are some cool knick-necks in here.

You know, there certainly will be. So I want to take it out of the ship and put it on some sort of sandy bit of the cove and just start to go through it and see if there's anything interesting beyond like money. Okay. There's any cool shells or like...

Yeah, make it... I would say you don't even make it... You take your time and you empty it out and you see that there are some strange... some strange shells interlace of colors. And as you pull them out,

they almost seem to kind of dance hypnotical. clay as you pull them out, Nautilus and conch shells. And there seems to be some strange glittering items and trinkets, a figurine carved from an art of far-off lands. And you actually find rolled up in a leather case. It looks like a map case as you find another map within. Another treasure map. As then written on it and really ticked up. in really terrible penmanship is Glitterbeard's real treasure hoarder.

Whoa. I would love a treasure nap. It's Glitterbeard's real treasure hoard. Look, it says right here on this map. Another one, no. Another treasure map. What are the chances? And this one was free.

Wow. Did he even cost two fish? Well. As you say that, Toa, you have the realization. Did anyone throw a fish into the cove before you made your journey out of the ship? And you realize that you're not sure if anyone had. Wait, what? You heard him. Do you anyone throw a fish?

Did anyone throw a fish into the cove before we went on a trip? No, I, no. We were supposed to do that, I think. I threw myself in to practice my swimming. I didn't really know that that was a thing, I guess. I just totally forgot. Oh, the person that I bought the treasure map from, he made a very ominous threat that if you don't offer it,

a fish to the cove before you go in and find the treasure. But, dude, what comes to you? Well, that's a pretty important thing to leave out. Dude, that's bad juju. It's at this point, the peaceful cove erupts in a splash of seawater. As where there had just been gentle lapping, you see thrashing water. As you see a massive, dark shape, start to rise up. and get larger and larger.

And in a massive cough and a splash of water that peltz you and drenches you in seawater, you see flashes of bright red and orange, kite and shell, looks crustacean as a massive creature that looks very crab-like with two massive claws and rises up. Wait, but nothing bad ever happens here. And rather than the decapodal legs that you're expecting,

it has a kite-ness, almost like humanoid-looking legs. And from where a belly of a crab might be, you see a very strange humanoid-looking, man-looking face jutting out, filled with rows and rows of vicious, monstrous teeth. Do I anything but this? We didn't give him a fish. I totally forgot until just now.

Why would you forget that? How can we forget? Oh, how can do this? Oh, no. We're sorry, we're sorry. He takes some fish. No, for initiative. Oh, no.

Oh, very bad. I got a six, so I'm assuming plus like two, maybe. Winnie. Oh. Nice. What many do money use is big enough? Proficiency bonus plus Dex is initiative, right? Yeah, plus two. I got an eight.

Just draw like a little beach? It's a little bit. What's anybody else? Yeah, he's a Donaldus. Oh, yeah. Grab not. Yeah, he's up in the corner, but he's next door. He looks kind of like that. But he's, yeah, actually just use that.

Just use the note card. Here's not. Oh, I said. I do like that. That's much better, yeah. I can't say this itself. It can't be. Oh, no.

The legends were true. As I don't think my heart can take this. 20 to 25. 20. Oh, wow. It's like a stranger's strong. And this obviously is not active, but. Okay.

Oh, shoot. 10 and 15. 18 would be Frize or Kiano. What you guys get? Eight, five. I'm so flea-guiste. Flibeguiste. What's gonna go here? And then we're gonna have any monsters one.

As you see a massive man-like crustacean erupt out of the cove, it's eye. walked on you with pure malevolent malicious intent. This is whom you had feared, and you never were sure if the stories were true, but they're all too real. Livedon dissolve. It's a Luffy turn. Or I guess it's, and the stats are there. Yes.

So it is Malia's turn. Now, Leah is going to, oh, Oh, man. I'm gonna take my spear and wing it at Hector Mancrab. Yeah. Hector Man, this is the one, the only, the fable, and I'm gonna give myself advantage because I have pack tactics with my crew.

Yeah. Natural 20. Wow, nice. Wow. All right. And that is one, so 2D6. Or how do you do, do you do the 1D6 piercing damage or 1D8 piercing damage

if used with two hands to become made. You're throwing it. I'm throwing it so it's a one piece. Oh, you're throwing. Okay. You're throwing it. Yeah. Nine, ten, eleven.

Okay. As Hector Mancrab erupts out of the water, Malia gets a great shot as she just throws the spear, and it flies and it pierces the, the, the, the typing shell of Hector Mancrab. As he slightly moves back a little bit and then just continues to look as it does damn. It does pierce in, but it doesn't slow him down. Keanu.

Dude, what? No, what? I look at it and I see that you've already stabbed him and I'll... We all have spears now. I found this under water because I can swim. And then I stab into him. Okay. I'm using my pack tactics because I was here.

That'll be a 15 to hit. Does not hit. It glances off of the tightness. Oh, what? Oh, no. With that. Oh, it is Hector Mancrabb's turn. I can't wait to find out how fuck we are.

And boy, does he look mad. He steps, he walks. as water is pouring off of him. As he looks at you with this crazy, disgusting mouth that's opening impossibly on this kindness crab body. As he's kindness, orange and angry. He's, um, he reaches out and looks at the two who had attacked him with spears,

and he sends his pincers at both of you. Oh, men. Um, that is going to be a 23 to head. Yes, he says. He got me. I was like, 21. I was like, what? Jesus.

You guys actually might both be dead. I like for real. Why isn't Tona told us the story of when all of his friends were literally murdered by action mancraft? Well, I kind of did. We just didn't believe him. No, I guess. I probably just blocked it out of my memory.

You did tell us about the horrors. You just didn't get in the specifics. Yeah. Yeah. This memory comes rushing back to you as you're transformed. Sorry, I need to see the actual stats here. 27 points of slashing damage to Malia. That's instant death. That's lethal.

That's his and death. Oh, men. And then I'm gonna die. Oh man, she just gets like, I just chopped in half. She explodes like a monster and quink into this fucking gib. Yeah, instant, instant. Instant.

Instant death. If it's more than 24, I also instantly die. No, it's last. 22. We have 11 hit points. Oh, you're right. If it's 23 points of it, it's just 23 points of damage. Your death is like.

And Hector may have lunges forward and just completely bisects both of the Goliaths and chucks them all these. Oh, my sushi now. Oh, God. I ready, I ready my spear and I look to tell us. who is just unflinchingly brave and I say, my spirit was in my prison wallet. And I go after Hector. What hell?

Make you a tag roll. That's a nightmare. That is a feeling. 11 plus three. What's pack tactics? I get advantage. I'll fish for a hit here. Nope.

So 14 to hit. Glances off of the armor. Oh, no. And it's very clear that. I hit it and it just slides off. As you've seen both of these friends get horribly bisected by a horrible crustacean creature. Oh, my friends!

You can't stop him stay away! No, thank you, coconut under a tree! And I'm gonna pull a fish out of my pack and throw it at him. Okay, that's my action. Make a persuasion check at advantage. Two natural ones. once. 13. 13. Pardon my sushi. I forgot about the battle. He's literally throwing fish and you're going to put sushi on the table. She's trying to keep it real. You see as he,

as he, as the fish flies towards him and with crazy fast reflexes, you see that disgusting mall open up and it snaps up the and he starts to chomp. And it seems for a moment he's focused on savoring this fish that he has. Okay. That would be his turn again, then. That was telling his whole turn. Yeah, well, he's focused on eating the fish right now. Oh, there's my shirt.

Yeah. I'll keep it taking. No, we have to run. You fooled. Help me brave. 15. Oh, this is me? That's regret.

And clas, you can't have a regret. Nope. It glances off, and it shall, and it's completely helped. And never thought that would happen twice. One of his eyes looks at you as he finishes eating a fish. Come in to the water. Come in to the water. The sand is being cooled in blood.

Yeah. Oh yeah, there's literally four halves of your friends. We have to run! And I'm gonna, like, is there a way out? Is there a clear way out? Yeah, there's a rope hanging down from the, uh, from the opening in this cove. Get to the rope. Get to the rope. Get to the rope.

Kai. You're my best friend. And I'm gonna run to the rope. And I'm gonna try to climb up and I'll throw another fish at him for my path. Okay, make it for a little bit of advantage. We'd be allowed to fud, be my best friend I'd be alive right now. Seven. He takes the, uh, he opens his out and snaps up. the fish, but after being attacked, by guy, he's going to make an attack roll.

What? He's just summoned my hope? Pins! You can't miss. Or not! It's just like this off! It's a plus a 13 to attack. Yeah, unless he rolls a natural one, you're dead. No, no, fuck you up, because there's no, mac, okay, he might not instantly kill you. He pincers, we're 10, 16, plus seven.

I'm just like that. He takes both of his pincers and just snaps this fear. He's so right, Tawa, I can... What a dark repressed memory, Toa? What the fuck? As, uh... As... What do you do, Toa, as you walk all your friends get slaughtered?

Uh... You don't even hit me here. Ah! Because I can't do anything. I'm just... I'm just gonna keep throwing fish out. I don't get it to get a fish. I can't get a fish.

I'm just like my other fish. Yeah. 17. 17. As your friends are dead and he looks and as you throw another fish, with the 17, you see him catch it with a claw and he shoves it in his mouth and Nash says, and then he looks up and he seems to be a little bit calm and he says, oh, thanks man. And he turns around and slowly walks into the coast.

into the water and disappears your the corpses of your friends left behind, but you don't even notice. As you are quickly climbing up this rope, as your memory is already repressing this, as the sheer terror of something that does not compute from what you've seen, all the treasure lost from glitterbeard's hoard forever. And as you get to the top, you see a flapping of wings. Oh my God. Well, my friends, I did. Do you remember the first time you witnessed death? Yes, yes. No!

Holy shit. Nice callback. Also, think about the amount of things that you'd have to forget. Is it someone you knew for 16 years? No wonder what Toa is the way that he is. This explains it blocking everything. No, the winter of an island of state.

They all look together on the same boat. It's a glorified! It's a beautiful phone, but they would too. Oh, Just growing, Mom. Standing at the top, like in the jungle. I didn't think this could be a very, as illuminating as it has been, but holy shit.

We all learned something new today. As the flapping of wings, you expect to see a seagull. I mean, they're very common here, but you see a bird at this point that you've never seen before. as a raven flies down and pecks the side of this verdant mountain and reality shatters around you. And once again, you're even closer now, the massive spiraling towers of this huge fortress of black and white, clouded and ravens, leaving Hector Mancrabbe behind as the floating body of Malia, the raven circles around it, as it flies forward and reality once again returns.

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