Legends of Avantris - Curse of Strahdanya | Ep. 29 | Cradle to Grave: Part 2

Episode Date: October 23, 2025

With Vallaki under assault by hordes of shambling undead, the Azran Expedition must charge forth into the tide of death to put an end to the rise of necromancy in the ruined town.   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/rnVXEUjQe4o?si=9BSYHrDDwPDjavB_

You are back in Velaki and listening to Kursa of Stradanya, a legends of a Ventress podcast. Last time, the horrible secrets of Baba Lysaga's creeping hut revealed themselves, and the Azran expedition made quite the discovery. The emulet of Ravenkind, strange schematics, and horrible etchings of three red eyes over and over and over. Congratulations, heroes. You discovered that the old hat. was mad. They then saw smoke rising from Volaki, clearly under attack. They rushed to the nearby Vistani camp and found everyone slaughtered, including the father of my beloved Victoria. But now is not

the time to grieve. Now is the time to fight or die. This episode is brought to you by our generous supporters on Patreon. You can become a patron yourself by following the link in the show notes. we are eternally grateful for your support. With that out of the way, let us proceed with the conclusion of Chapter 14, cradle to grave. It looks like a set of jewelry that your mother used to owe.

The same filigree around it as the earrings that you've seen in all of her portraits and the necklace around her neck. You don't remember saying a ring, but it's unmistakable. And as you pull it off, of his finger. You look, you begin to inspect it.

You see, etched into the inside, my beloved Victoria. I'll take the ring and just slide it onto whatever finger fits on. On you, it would easily fit on any of your fingers. Okay.

Never got to new him. This whole trip was to find out where I came from. They're all gone now. It is a short ending to what would have been perhaps a very long and happy relationship with your father. I'm sorry you had to lose him so soon. I don't know that it's right to bring him back, though. I think the scales may be in balance now, but it is still your decision, and I will support it either way.

Largo is safe now. I don't think any man in his right mind, not under the affliction of the charm of Stradanya, would have done what he did. But if it was to save you and if he thought your life was in danger and he was trapped here, maybe he thought that was for a good enough reason. Perhaps. Bright side, it looks like he fell by her blade and not by her minions. Yes.

I suppose it would redeem some first previous dates. There is some comfort to be taken. in a swift death. Hopefully he was not tortured. So I'll just, if his eyes were not closed, I'll close his eyes and just kind of like, you know, write him. You do that.

You write his body, you close his eyes, and you see a patched blanket off to the side. You grab it, and you lay it over him to cover him up. Aside from that, the rest of the desk of Hubble seems to be devoid of anything of value. I was hoping to have just a moment with Sarnax while we're like.

Do you want us to leave the room? No, I'd like everybody to stay. Keep keeping on a chaperonist if you will. He's turned to page five of the Sarnax. Yes, Shepherd's Shepard. It feels I'm repeating myself here, but I do not like the attention Victoria's getting from Shannania.

Neither do I. I'm worried about her. I really am. Do you believe she will betray us? Not of her own volition. No. No. I don't think she'd do that. I think we care about each other. And I don't believe in people being inherently evil.

I don't believe that. I don't. I think that everybody's born good. I really do. I don't know what all this dust gal stuff is about. And I don't want to know. not one of my business. And I'm just worried about Victoria.

Your worry is not misplaced, Shepard. I see the darkness within her. I see the wickedness that lurks behind her eyes. That's awfully harsh, don't you think? Come on. Sometimes, Shepard, the truth is very harsh.

You have seen the way her body He reacts to the countess. No, no. You've seen her eyes, have you not? I want to make sure we all get out of here alive. That's it. All right.

All right. That's it. I agree. I understand that there's a little bit of no man for him or herself, but we're not doing that. I've got to make sure everybody gets out of here a lot. You said it yourself. You put that on me, all right? About being the shepherd?

Yes. I didn't choose that name. You think I chose it. was that? You chose. No. Virtue name. And I believe it was fate that inspired you.

Your fate is all you here on this path. We're all getting out of here, and that includes you. You understand? I understand what you're saying, to my shepherd. I do. So be it. But... We just can't let her have Victoria.

We can't. I hope she does not claim her. But in the end, Victoria herself said, everyone has a choice. When the time comes, she will have to make hers. I hope the light within her outshines and purges the darkness. You're right. But if it does not, we must be prepared to do what needs to be done. You're right. I believe in her.

I believe she'll make the right choice. I do. I believe that you will shepherd her to light, that you will shepherd her to goodness. She brought her away from the Countess in the darkness And the darkness that now goes beyond Stradania That goes beyond this land, perhaps All right This is a corruption and an evil that is

Far greater than I ever could have I know, damn it, I know, I know I know Make the choice when the time is right I think she will I hope But you will as well an opportunity.

So what are you going to do? I am looking for anyone living, any survivors. None. So once I feel like I fully investigated the camp, I will sort of wait for the others on the outskirts towards the town preparing to kind of rush into the Velocchi. Is there any, I would want to just look for anything

within the camp that would have sort of like history or like anything that I could kind of like learn about the dust guys. I would say you're able to, if you wanted to, you could take his satchel, which had some things in it, some notes and what appears potentially to be a journal and some things. Okay. So newspaper clippings. And you can take that. It'll take you a while to go through it, but you can at least take it with you.

Okay. Are you ready? I think so. We need to keep going. See if there's anyone that we can help. Let's make up with the others. And so we'll find the professor. And we'll all rush out to Valki.

You meet up together. Your father's pack now attached to your hip. As you look out over the village of Valki, you can still hear the screaming. It's loud in there, and you're not quite sure what you face. But you look between each other and you know what has to be done. As you make a run towards the gates of the city, you know that this is the entrance closest to the chapel.

As you make your way towards it, you see almost immediately that the gate itself has been completely removed from the hinges. The guards that would have been lining the top are no longer there. Smoke pores from the guard tower. There's movement. skittering. And as you make your way towards it, you look in and you're met with unspeakable horrors.

Hundreds of shambling zombies and skeletons patrol the streets. Vampire spawn, dart in and out of the buildings. You watch as people run this way and that. The door to the church is off of its hinges. Oh, no. And that's what you see. At the gates, I'm going to, like, put my hand in front of whomever might be, like, a bime here next me.

Time out. We can't fight this. I don't know what's going on with the church, but I figured there'd be at least some kind of holy ground, something. How did they get into the church? It's been desecrated. It must have been. But we cannot.

We cannot fight this. We're outnumbered hundreds of one. We can't do it. I mean, the children made it to the abbey. Father Lusian has to have made it with them. They have to have. I would have. Oops.

Even if in this point, if you want to go into the church, then fine, let's do it. But we got to go quick. And we're going to be severely outnumbered. Hold on. So we do this. I think because I leveled, I can prepare one more spell now that I realize. You would be able to do it. I love my ring of peace.

I will use a fifth level spell slot to open my case, take out of a brief. bit of bat phone. I'll say Oculus and an arcane eye will appear and go invisible. Let me take a look around, hopefully in safety. All right. This doesn't look good. So my eyes will flash kind of a shifting purple, pink, blue arcane energy, and the eye will start to work its way. And you're having it go where? So first I'll send it into the church. you send the eye towards the church and you see that the entire church has been has been desecrated, that the graves in the graveyard have been, it almost looks interred, but as you're looking at it through the eye, you can see whatever had been in there has been raised.

And as you make your way into the church itself, you see that there had been a hasty retreat from here. and you begin to move it around and you see where things have been packed up, things have been on the floor. There are no signs of the children, no signs of Father Lucian. And you see where it looks as if the bones of St. Markovia have been pulled from their location. Presumably by Father Lucian to go to the Abbey. Yes. To take it, okay. So then I will send it basically just down the thoroughfare over to Blinsky's up to the Vachter House.

whip the eyeball out as you begin to send it down. You see throngs of chambling zombies and rickety skeletons that are moving with jerky movements all around, banging on buildings. You see people inside, towering behind their doors, screaming and yelling for help as these creatures are trying to pull their doors from the hinges to access them. You see the occasional vampire spawn skitter out of the shadows. and make its way into a house you can hear as they drain the life and blood from the inhabitants therein. And as your eye move forward through the chaos, you get towards the center of town, where you see the burgomaster, what appears to be four vampire spawn,

ripping the flesh from his body, as he screams out. You move past it. He's calling out in fear, crying as he is being devoured by these vampires. Empire spawn, you make your way towards Blinsky's. It appears to be barricaded. Toys at the windows, hurling knives out at the other creatures. Whatever, whatever mechanical

creations that he had created to protect his place or doing the work. The door itself, a gaping maw is, with sharp metal teeth, are mashing if anything that tries to come into contact with. Oh, yeah, Blinsky? There are mechanical

what appear to be mechanical ravens that are darting down and around and fighting off of these things and your eye looks in and you can see Blinsky towering in the back corner an army of toys with knives and sharp teeth and other weapons.

Hunkered down in front of him you see that one of these what appears to be a small goblinoid toy creation five different goblinoids with a small but large for toy size,

catapult is flinging large rocks out the window and into these things, doing everything that they can to keep them at bay. You whirl your eye around, nothing but carnage instruction, buildings on fire, zombies, skeletons, as far as the eye can see, as you begin to look down the alley towards, walk your house, completely pristine and untouched.

and in the very center of the pathway, Lady walked her herself, standing in an outfit you've never seen before, her skin, pure, white, next to her, the shambling abomination of her husband, a golem stitched together of flesh and bone. She looks, almost knowingly, at the eyeball that's now making its way towards her.

she reaches one arm out and she raises it. You see two skeletons shamble out of the earth and stand beside her. She raises her other arm, two more skeletons. And as she looks directly at the eye, you shouldn't be able to see it, but she does. You see as she smiles

and two glistening fangs protrude from her upper lip. Professor, what do you see? Come on, tell me. Is there any hope? What did I see at the Blue Water Inn? In the Martik House? Oh, at the Blue Water Inn.

As you pass the Blue Water Inn, you saw as these zombies and the skeletons are bashing at the doors. You hear sounds from inside screaming, crying, begging. It's all so loud, it's hard to pick out individual voices, but whoever's in there has barricaded themselves in well enough so far. If possible, I would like to send the eye, like in, if there's an entrance from the upstairs. You whip back away from Lady Wachter and towards the Blue Water Inn.

You head up towards one of the windows at the very top where you know that the balconies were inside with the rooms where the guests would stay looking out over the inside of the inn. And you see what appears to be about 10 people all appearing to be patrons looking out over or hunkered down behind tables that are overturned, chairs and tables that are pushed up against the doors as they're trying to protect themselves. and up in the rafters, you see what appears to be about seven or eight ravens flying this way and that, occasionally darting out and then back in.

And you believe those to be the MARCOMS. What's it look like? Is there any hope? There are survivors, but... Well, we have to go. Do I get in the sense that, like, could we fight our way through town? You imagine you could.

It's going to be difficult. Professor just say the fucking word. If there's anybody that we can say, we gotta do it. Oh, go master. been torn to shreds, but... Fuck the Bergenzky is alive. The Moddikovs are alive.

They're doing their best to survive. We should go now. I draw both weapons. If we can say people we've got to. Lady Wachter is a vampire. She seems to be the one doing this. What? Or at least somewhat responsible for this.

I saw her raised skeletons. She has raised her husband as a horrible abomination. And she could see my eye. looked at me in defiance. Should we go to her directly? She's controlling all of this. Maybe if we kill her,

this will stop. Is that even a fucking question? We're putting her in the fucking dirt. Fuck this! And I go. I fucking both weapons drawn, I'm going.

All right. And I am gunning for Lady Wachter's house. Fuck this shit. Blame, play, blame, as I'm not fucking, I am not even hesitating.

We'll fight our way through town. Oh, Lord. I need you all to roll for a next day. And I'm, as we do that, I'm going to use five charges to daylight and have daylight blazing from the symbol of Ravenkind. As we're walking, I'm going to have the Rki and I just heading back towards me. Yes, I feel right. So, before we start, there are some things that I guess I should explain. How this is going to work is, as you were walking down the streets, I'm going to have you roll a D20.

And on an even, you are not accosted. On an odd, you are, they notice you and swarm you. And then I'm going to have you, I'm going to have you roll a D-100, and that will determine what gets the outcome. Oh, very cool. So. Oh, I like that a lot. And so that way, if you keep being swarmed over and over and over again,

there are a total of 10 rounds between where you're at and getting. to Lady Wachter. There are a total of six rounds if you are trying to go for Blinsky. If you go for Blinsky, then it's another six rounds to get to Lady Wachter. So I will say that without knowing

that information, I clearly stated my goal was Wadder. I'm just letting you know that it does increase to get to her because you're going off the beaten path. I don't give the fuck about him. And I'm guessing because he just beeline for it, there's no opportunity for stealth.

behind them. No, I don't give a shit. I was literally running down the street fire. There wouldn't have been an opportunity for stealth because of the way it is. The opportunity is they the idea is they are trying to kill as many people as possible.

You're running down the street but a lot of them are distracted. So it's a role of the dice as to whether they give a shit about you and choose to attack you and deter from their actual targets. And so that is how we're playing it. When we do engage in combat that's when you're going to deal with this initiative round will ask for the entire

thing. And then on top of that, I would be using tokens that I have here. Those tokens are not going to be visibly what it is that you're fighting. I will tell you what you're fighting and you just tapped a theater of mine because I didn't want to make hundreds of skeletons for

one battle. Of course. We have sunlight going. Is that correct? That is what's happening. So for the sake of it, you might as well take these. You ever as salt day. When I have you put things down, they will be just kind of around you in an arc in the front. Like we're walking in.

Yes. I took off. I'm definitely in the front, and I'm like, firing my gun. Like, it's really... It is with that that Sonny's... Raises up the medallion,

the ambulance you just received and activates it as sunlight spills out around you. You begin to move forward. Shepherd, judgment, and redemption are pulled out as you began to let loose blasts of energy. You were all moving through the streets in Victoria, Clayton, you're letting loose fire bolts as you're blasting skeletons and zombies

protecting house upon house. Sarnax and Kana, you are, Kana, you're cleaving in with your weapons. Zombies and skeletons are falling at your feet as you're making your way through. I need you to roll a D20. No. Even ten.

You continue through. You're able to clear away all of the skeletons that are rising up out of the graveyard around the, church as you fell all of them two houses off to the sign children are screaming inside with their parents you're able to hesitate you blast away the creatures around it clearing out they are they are now safely inside as you've cleared a pathway forward that is one one round you continue moving forward i need you roll at 20 20 okay once again you continue to move forward there are a few

shops lining the way. Shepherd, you are blasting left and right. The moment you see movement, you shoot down an alleyway, and the blast makes contact with a vampire spawn, almost immediately caught by both Victoria and Clayton, you obliterate it from existence. You free up a few more buildings. The people inside are safe and safe.

Keep it up, team. And I need someone else to roll. 15. 15. All right. You 100. You watch as it's blast. You look behind you.

D20 or D-1? A D-20? Now you roll D-100. Oh. Oh, wow. You look behind you as you smile at your friends. You have cleared a huge pathway down the streets of Vala. And there's a sense of, what is that?

24. There is a sense of accomplishment as you clear all of this around. and this moment that you see the skittering along the sides. One to the left, one to the right. And as you look around, you see as ten shambling zombies

make their way out of an alleyway, flanking on both the left and the right, one vampire spawn on either side. It is with that as they spill out around you, Kana, you will move in. What would you like to do?

I will walk up to the center and I will say this will be your last day and I'll take the dodge action so I'll just move me up oh like up to the middle here yeah Clayton needing to conserve

my spell slots I will stand right here and I will fire bolt vampires spawn will say two okay why don't I roll two guys either way it's a five plus ten, 15 15 hits

That's 18 fire damage You let loose a bolt of fire directly at one of the vampire spawn It singes its flesh But it seems to be holding on That's very uncomfortable And it is the zombies turn They are all going to flake around Kana

And they are all going to attempt to hit her At disadvantage Two. Oh, great. Only two of them hit. Lovely. And I get six temporary hit points. Nice to do. For a total of 11 points of damage. 13 points of damage, sorry.

So six. And that is their turn. Oh, the temporary hit points I gained, I just lost from, so that's awesome. Oh, Victoria. Love this vestige. I'm going to reach out my hands and yell, Watch out kind of!

And I will raise my hands. up and skeletal arms and stuff will start to turn the earth and then big glass of grave dirt will come up in a 20-foot area right around here. Okay. And so that will be deck saving throws, and that would include Kana. It does include Kana, but you are taking the dodger. So I don't know if you want to do that. Your advantage.

Dex what? If you're dodging, you're advantage on deck's safe. Yes. near advantage on deck's 8. There you go. Decks 18. Decks 18. Yerp.

And does that include the vampire spawn? Yeah. It would be anything forward of stuff. Yeah. Even this one? What's the radius of that? Both vampire pass? Oh.

No, he would be out. It's a four by four. So everything in this chunk would be. So call it non-vampire. Vampire Spun. So one vampire spawn and... Vampire one is inside of it. Yes.

Okay. You passes. Okay. 19. So anything that failed gets 19 bludgeoning damage and anything that past hits half of that. 19 bludgeoning. That's magical. So my... But if you passed, yes. I didn't pass. You didn't take the dodge?

I did. I did. I will have advantage. I still failed. Oh, shit. I'm sorry. Two of them are blasted out of existence. It doesn't matter which ones? I have 10 HP. Oh, no, no. Yes, two of them are blasted out of existence. And then I'm going to just swing around here.

Vampire spawn. It is the vampire spawning. Each take 20 radiant damage. Immediately. That's like a third of the health pool. Fuck, yeah, let's go. My scaly friend. Fuck you.

I'm just holding one lantern, I'm just doing, where the fuck is my shit? One is going to move up towards Shepherd in between those two. Yeah, you can get up there. The other one is going to to move directly towards Victoria.

Oh, shit. And it is... So this is difficult terrain. It is. So what's their speed? Oh, shit. 30. Oh, he still makes it.

And I think in sunlight the disadvantage on attack rolls, right? He makes it 15 feet. He probably doesn't make it to Victoria. Well, actually, he could go, hold on. So it's just this. He could go one and a half, two and a half, three and a half, four and a half.

Yeah. If he's smart enough to go around... I would say he's smart enough to get there. Because if creatures are being hurt by somebody, he's like, I'm going to avoid that and skirt it, right? Even if it's animalistic... It has a lot, but the vampires are like animal... Yeah, I believe it.

They are at disadvantage because of the sunlight, but they're going to grapple with one of their attacks, and they're going to get it on Victoria. And he is going to then make a bite attack. And, yeah, no, that's 13 misses, we'll miss. And then the other one on Shepherd is going to attempt to grapple and fail. He's going to try it again and also fail. Wow. Shepherd, Shepherd.

Well, shit, I had a plane until the vampire spawned bum rushed me. what I'm going to do is focus on the vampire spawn bonus action slayers prey and two attacks. The attacks are going to be sharpshooter attacks. Which vampire spawn? The one in front of it? No, 2. Number two. And this guy.

So I get a This is going to be a 16 minus 5 as 11 for one of them. To hit? One of them? Yeah, I figured. And the other one is going to be a 23-month- minus 5 is 18. That hits. All right. So this one will hit, which is going to be 11 plus 6 plus 10 is 16.

11 plus 16 is 27 in one shot. To number two. To vampire spawn number two. So still pretty good. And move, Shepard. Really? Yeah. I'm not fucking moving.

You let the stew of your blasts of energy and you see as it's moving. towards you as some of its flesh is rendered from its body as the arcane blasts sink into it. It looks to be feeling very weak. Okay. And I'm not moving. I've planted my feet and I fight these guys. Shirtnax, go.

Firebox and Fart box and sharknax. Ew. Firmbox and shark next. Five. Five. Five. Go! Those are my favorite Pokemon. So at least it's not Sharks snacks. 20. 20. 25.

It was very. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. It was over here because he got him. Oh, okay. That's right. I'm going to move into, I'm going to move away.

I'll take two opportunity attacks from the zombies. Okay. And I'm going to get directly behind top. And the zombies are not. And you don't take damage from her thing, right? When you enter it for, no. No. No.

Just terrain. The initial blast and then it misses. 18 missiles. Um, ooh, 22. 22. 23. 23, I'm going to use my reaction to blind it. That's not to try.

Is it already a disadvantage? No, not the zombies. Not the zombies. Got it. Yeah. So I'm going to stand there and, uh, we do not have time for this. And I'm going to cast word of radiance. They all need to make it.

Uh, the three immediately next to me are you need to make a constitutional savings. Do I need to make one too? Uh, no. I'm hanging on to my second help fire for a video of them. One of them passes. So the one that passes will not take any damage. The other two will take

10, 13, 14 points of radio damage. 14 points of radio. All zombies. No, the two that didn't pass. Oh, fuck. You can rid of two of them. The one they're next to me, directly next to me. Yeah, those two are. The worst.

Yeah, those two are. They're good. Get one off of Shepard. no he took to her oh yeah yeah that is one of my boy my boy shepherd yeah my man all right kana um i will swing at the one to my right yep uh that should hit with a 26 yes that hits or 21 sorry that's a 10 at 15 points of silver you slash into it and rend its flesh it falls clattering to dust. Diagonal. Almost natural 20.

13. Oh, man. I'm very sorry. 13 hits. Oh, fuck yeah. God is tearing. Got to almost give it up. Oh, man. You got to almost give it up.

That's the problem with ice towers. They are out. Another 13 points of magical slashing. You slice through this one completely, rending it you sliths to the ground. The one to the diagonal, am I right? And then last attack. That should hit with a 21.

That does. Re-roll two's. Tell me about you. You re-roll two. You get a one. Yeah, it's super rare. You're still... No, no, you're not back. Yes.

Always better. Agreed. Agreed. You always want to... No worries. Six magical still slashing to the line. You slice into it, and it falls to the ground.

Sure, it would be quite a hundred. Second, second death. I will move to... That's true. It's true. It's right next to the vampire spawn. You just popped off. That'll be my turn.

Okay. You just feel like put in a blend. Victoria, you should probably get away. Like, not to, and I will cast fire bolts. At the vampire spawn. Ooh, 16? For the vampire spawn, that hits. Ooh.

Who-hoo. There's one or two. One or one. One. Oh, is it? Yes. Two. Yes.

Okay. Two. Oh, no, no. That's one. No, it's one. Fuck yes. 26 fire dam. and then do I have any yield?

You blast into it with fire damage and you you watch some of the flesh on its body begins to singe on its cheek where some of the embers hit. You see the flesh melt away its fangs are protruding from the open wound and it's still holding on. And it is the zombies turn there.

I'll just move like... The one on Kana is going to attack Kana at regular. And it It is going to hit with a 22. Okay. 10 points of damage. This is regular, like, slashing. It's not magical.

Just slashing. And then the other two are going to make a match at Shepard. And a 15 is the highest. So both of those are going to miss. Did the, oh, the zombies, sorry. No. Zombies, Victoria. My turn.

Okay. I'm going to reach up my hand towards. the vampire response. And I'm grappled, correct? Did he grappled? Yes. Okay. And so I will

reach up my hand and a skeletal hand will appear and just try to grapple him in return. So that will be a chill touch. 16, so this is 16, brub, brough, brough, brough,

16 necrotic damage. I couldn't remember the word, necrotic damage. And they have disadvantage against me until the end of my next turn and you cannot regain hit points. You, yes.

That's why I was like, worth the gamble. You feel your hand reach in and grab on to the vampire spawn. It doesn't feel like it's doing the amount of damage

that you had expected, but you do feel like it has some sort of effect. And so 16, which means eight. This ain't our first time of the road unit. Right.

It's not our first rodeo. I've been around once or twice. All right. So I'd appreciate if you don't all make fun of my accent. It is their turn. 20 points of Watch as the sunlight radiating from the amulet that Sarnax holds pulses and undulates as you watch one of the vampire spawn, the one that is directly in front of Shepherd shrieks a horrific sound as the flesh is seared from its body. It turns to ash and dust at your feet.

You got a boy, Sarnax! The other one is still holding strong. It is going to attempt to bite into a very event. Victoria. Thank you, you, Torp and Matt. We're really appreciate it.

Seriously, yeah. It is going to hit us. Spread and a love. Let's see. Wait, I got a dab in the same bridge. Can we get that triple dab going?

Triple dab? Here we go. You're all driving this way? Bo! Yay! Hey, remember dead memes? 12 points of necrotic damage for the first one.

Oh. Whiteball. I love to have it at that. And your max health lowers by that as well. Well, same. Four-nine. Man, Victoria's getting chewed out. And then 13 points of necrotic damage.

And your max help also lowers by that. You're at a disadvantage. What was this? 14 and 12? So 12 and 14. They're hungry. And it is now Shepardt's strong. Watching the vampire that I was, was dead to rights in front of me,

basically disintegrate in front of my eyes. I put one foot on the zombie to my left and kick it away as I turn towards Victoria and Slayerspray and double shoot the vampire spawn that's grappling Victoria. And they are going to be a shark shooter shot. Oh, fuck, yeah. So that's going to be, that's definitely going to hit 28 minus 5 is 23. And then this is going to be an 18 minus 5 is 13. Yeah.

Oh, vampire spawn. Vampire spawn. So we'll resolve the first one. Okay, perfect. And then the other one will be on a zombie. So that one will hit as well. So that's going to be a seven plus 16 to hit for damage. Seven plus 16.

You let loose one shot directly into the chest. And at first, Victoria reels back as if she's taken damage from it, but you see of this smoldering piece of lace on her shoulder where your arcane blast nearly missed her and found perches directly into the heart of this creature. It lets out a roar of pain as it bursts into ash and falls to the ground dead. The second hit, you then turn redemption directly towards the,

we'll say, one of the zombies. It was 13, right? Yeah, it was 13. The other one was 13 days. Their AC is an 8 from zombies. So as the first shot loses and kills the vampire spawn, I'm Miss Isaacs, my apologies! I unleash another shot.

And that's going to be... 18. Never meant to make to survive your cry. I apologize. 18. 18. 18 news. Hey boomers. I am for rap songs from 19.

So 18 do a zombie. It is littering for the system. It'll be the one next to me. It's a long way. There should be two left. Yes, there are. Um, star next.

Oh, I can't get quite in range. The cake was just for flavor. I'm gonna, I'm gonna walk up to the one, uh, uh, next to the shepherd,

and I'm going to, uh, cast, I'm gonna cast that spell that has a dodge. Take it flame. Uh, no,

it fails. Uh, he goes to three D-8 radiance. We're all my fucking D-8s. I'll get it. Right. Right. It's a lot.

Wow. Um, 10, 12, uh, uh, uh, uh,

uh, uh, 17 points of gradient. You let Lucidol and bring your energy and you, you vaporized. These all be in front of you. Conan. I'm going to switch out my Navinata for my blood sphere.

I'm going to go ahead and make attacks, versatile attacks two-handed. I'm going to drop my Nobi-Daga. 29 a hit. That was me. These are D8 plus five. Big bow. seven points of

magical piercing you slide your blade into it and you watch as it falls to the ground dead when you hit with a melee attack using this magic spear reduced the target to zero you gain 2D6 temporary hip points I know it's going and I get

810 hip points That was our third round That was your third round That was our Fourth round Oh, no, sorry. We gotta keep moving. Come on.

You're able to clear out this mob that drew its way to you, but there is still mayhem and madness ahead of you. I need someone to roll a D-20. I think it's your turn. It's right. So it's our next. Well, fly in furniture. Four.

Four. No, that was the fourth one. We're just tracking how many evens and odds we did. That'll be a natural one. No, but this is our, that's the fourth. This is the fourth roll. Okay, got it. Got it.

You, I need one of you to roll. Oh, I failed, so I have to take it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let them like he rolled the D-Wa-Hund up. My prison is shame. Eighty-nine. That's killing me. Hey.

You look around, have obliterated all of these things in front of you, and you are not caught off guard as you see 10 more zombies make their way out, and you're looking around, but you do not see any vampires spot. Oh, nice. Seventy-9, we need one more zombie. Okay. You could find one more, no, no, there were only, it was the bad time. I miscounted, there's 10.

Thank you very much. It sucks to suck. What did you get for initiative? Oh, fuck. No, no, no. I, uh, I think this. We would have continued the original abortion, right?

Yep. Yes. They're in front of us. This is happening immediately after. You haven't even moved. You should be exactly where you were. Well, no, we, some of us shifted during the combat, but we would have regrouped and we would have done.

This is literally, no, this is literally how we were. I'm saying you haven't moved forward. Oh. You haven't progressed at all. Oh, at all. That was to see if you moved forward to what you did. So you are exactly.

So you're exactly where you were. You just see more zombies filling out. It was like this. That's close to what it was. I think that's exactly where it was. So we can progress? What the fuck, Sarn X? What did I do?

I choose to shoot Sarn X in the head. No. Connor. So do you run of combat? I'll pick up my Noggi Nata, put it on my back, run forward, take the Dodge action, and I'll hold my bloodspear in my hand, and I'll just, I'll stand right here, see if any of these guys come out there, and then I'll just take the dodge action.

All right. Clayton. Maybe you'll kill them. Oh, no. What's all about? Hey, and spit! I will. Crabt picks and football! I have no idea.

Never one. Is it a tank and spank? Yeah, it's like... It's a World Warcraft thing. I miss. Crabt peaks of footballs from the movie. You do? I'd be missed.

What did you get? A one. Oh, yeah, no, you missed. Victoria. I'm gonna fling a black flame fire bullet just a zombie in front of me. Or I tank it. That is a great name. That is...

8. 23 to hit. That misses. Don't feed into that. Don't feed into that. It blows up. 14. 14?

Oh, it doesn't die. 14 points of damage? Yeah. No. No, no, it does die. It does die. I thought you said you're 8. 10 hit points.

What? 10 hit points. My turn? I'm going to take three sharpshooter attacks. Okay? Fuck out. Go for the blood of God.

Well, that one's going to hit. Then I'm good. That is a third. My lowest I can get it. Well, you can miss one. No, no, no. The lowest I can get is a natural one. Because I have 13 minus five would be. If I roll, it doesn't matter. Those hit. That hits. So three attacks.

So roll them individually. Just so we see. That's a one plus 13 is 14. One's dead. That's a three plus 13 is 16. Another dad. That's a... Fuck.

They die instantly because you have the title. I don't give a fuck. Yeah. Those are wrong. So three more dead. Perfect. Amen. That was Shepherds.

So the zombies are... The ones in front of Connor are going to stay there. The ones that are towards the side are going to move towards Shepard. So, like, they're going to kind of flank around here? Yes. So I'll do four around. Yeah, that's fine. And then, like, here.

That, that, yeah. So I good? I'll use my reaction to hit this one as for an opportunity attack, see if I can... Okay, do it. Hit with my blood spear. Yeah, 24. So its movement becomes zero here. Which is dead, though.

Potentially. Potentially. Oh, yeah. It's a D8. Plus. Uh, no, seven points. But, uh, seven points of, oh, does it go down? Oh, no.

Okay. But I stop it where it's at. So it can now hit star an ax instead of Shepard. Or a comma, again. Yeah. Okay, so that one doesn't move forward, but the other one's going to go against Kana. That one is going to hit. There he's a disadvantage.

Oh, because you're dodging. So only one of them hits. I'm doing 12 points of damage to you. And then one is going against Shepard, and that is going to miss. That is the zombie's turn. My turn? Yes. I'm going to move directly against the Kana.

If you can just move me on the left side, I want to take two opportunity attacks. First one's been a match. The middle swat. Second one's been a mess. Then I'm going to raise up my lantern and cast board of gradients. So the three you need to make a saving throws

Cubs can't be saving throw, DC 18. One of them passes. Okay, he takes nothing but the other two take a set 15 points in the image. Two of them are obliterated. Alliterated. Okay. Kana.

I'm going to Sorry about that. One towards Rich. I don't... Oh, 13. What's there I see? That should be good. I think that's...

That's five. Yeah, 13 points, so that one gets obliterated. I gained 6, 10 pipp points. And then the one in front of me. That should hit with a 20. D8. That should also kill it with a 13. That does.

I gain eight hit points, so that overrides the six. And then last hit on the one in front of me, 19. That's only a one, so six damage to that one. Six magical piercing. Okay. You slice into it, it is still holding strong. Clayton.

I will fire bolt this one. Okay. Do it to it. Hit. Last one. I will... I'll just rush up there. And fire bolt, D-1.

Mate to fit. D-10. Damn, that's good. He did. Chibouty. All right. I need someone to roll a D-20. We haven't moved at all.

You, I mean, not since the last round of course. So we have to have successful. Seven. Wow. Oh, no. We're, it'll take, actually, we're something closer, right? No, well, you're physically not moving.

We have to get... It still is only the 10 reps. Okay, that's what we... So I'm not extending the rounds, but you have to physically count. So... It's not like now all of a sudden you're up to 12. And it makes any more stream, might have to be one if they did all that yet.

Yes, then 100? Yep, D100, please. 23? Yeah. Okay. Favorite number? You... You let loose your blows, fire arcane energy

of slashing your radiant damage. And it just feels like the waves won't end, the sound of the fighting, drawing more and more attention is you see 10 more zombies and two more vampire spots ascend around you. Kana, you watch as 10 more of these zombies shamble into view around every corner, climbing out of windows, as well as two vampire spot that make their way around on either side. I... Is this turn is it, Conno? My turn.

I will do it. I will just stand in front of... I'm going up there. How far up? I'm going to go right in the middle of them. Okay. I will do the same. I will move up 10 feet right here.

Yeah, that's perfect. 15 feet, and I will take the dodge action. Very cool. Come up, me, scoundrels. And that is my turn. I'll take the dodge action. I'm going to... Rinse and repeat.

...attack this guy. That's going to be that's going to be that effective. Yeah. You're not that effective. Yikes. What? Well, you made me roll really poorly.

It's still got to be more than 10. Oh, yikes. 25 damage. Can I take five seconds? Damage from that? I know it's under damage. It's under damage. Blast in with a firebolt singeing

some of its flesh, and it is, standing there, it doesn't seem to be too affected. I'm going to raise my hand in the same skeletal hand that you saw before will rush out towards the spawn on my side and let's call

like gripping in the eyeballs or some shit. The same one that Clayton just attacked? Yeah. Let's put the fire. Maybe gentlemen. Well, I remember if you get off the 20 HP. A 19 hits? Yeah, it's from 14. 14. And it has

disadvantaged against me and that is your spectral hand, your necrotic damage? Chill touch. Yes, that's necrotic. Yeah. So it's half. Chill touch is the worst name spell in the entire game. Prove me wrong and avatrice chill, but this doesn't be full damage, it's not a touch spell. Well,

but it's a hand that grows. It's a hand, but shoots a skeletal. I agree with the chill, though. It's the chill of the green. Shepard. I'm going to take, actually, I'm going to do a sweet fucking tuck and roll action. as I fall back next to the professor. And I'm going to take three sharpshooter shots on my boy right here. Vampires spawn number two.

Oh, there we go. Three sharpshooter shots. This is number two. Boom. So the lowest so far is going to be a 22 minus 5 is 17. All that. So one more. Oh, that one probably going to miss.

Negative one plus 13, 12. Misses. Okay, so two hit. power yes so that's going to be 8 plus 6 plus 6 plus 20 so 32 plus 8

is 40 8 plus 12 is 20 40 and 2 chefs so the vampire spawn number 2 vampire spawn number 2 you blast into it with your bolts of arcane energy and it looks like it is

it's shocked as it takes a massive amount of damage exposed bones. And as I come up out of my roll, fire in two shots and say, get them, Sarnix! And it is now the vampire's bomb's turn.

What? It's my turn. Oh, no, your name is Sarnat. I'm going to walk up next to Kama. I would do that damn too. And I will cast they all need to make

Constitution saving throws. D.C. is 18. Every single one of them? Oh, no, no. The four of them. Four zombies. Four zombies. Four zombies.

Four zombies. Fuck, I hate you so much. Zumb babes. Some babes. Three paths, one fails. They have very high constitution. I don't know. It's just AOE.

So five, 11 points of damage. So one dies. One dies. Get the one in front of Kana. All right. And is the vampire spawns turn. One is going to move up behind Kana. And the other one is going to move up behind Sarnap.

After they each take 20 damage. Oh. Radiant damage. And they're also disembarked. advantage. Is it only within five feet of it? Oh, no. Jesus. So they're all just dead, then.

No, no, no. The first one is going to miss both of us on Kana. It is going to, with its first one, it is going to grapple, uh, Sarnax. And then it is going to attack to bite you and not be able to do that. I'll be grapple. I'll let me grapple. I'll take it. I'll take it. That's fine. These zombies are then going to spread around Sarnax, Kana, and some of them are going to move towards Shepard. The ones on the edge are going to move towards Shepard. These zombies are 20.

I am going to have how many are in front of one, two, three on two. There are technically four on the overlap. Yeah, I'd say with the overlap, there's a lot. one, two, three on the five on each. Both those missed. Both those missed. Oh, that's good. Yeah.

What's your AC again? 19. Okay, so only one of those hits. So one of those zombies is going to hit on you. Doing a total of 12 points of damage. Ah, fuck. And then three are going to hit Kana to you or fail.

I didn't make you know. Missed you then. No, I do like that. Oh, and you're still dodging. Destroy it. I would agree with that. All three of them are going to. All right.

So three 10 hits. Yep. Love it. And that is the zombie's turn. Kana. I'm going to turn around and take out my Naginata, and I'm just going to do all of my hits bonus action to give myself. I'm going to save that, actually, for Lady Wachter.

I'm going to do all three hits against the spawn. Is it a barred too? I don't play strong as a bar when we played our shitty ass off match. 23 for the first one. And he's this number one or number two? The one that's right next to you is number one. It says number one. All right.

So seven points of magical silvered slashing for the first hit. Seven? Yep. seven. Second one hits for the 26th. This one will be 11 points of magical silvered slashing. And then the third attack 19 is 19 hit against a vampire spawn. And that'll be through 12 points of magical slashing.

You slash in one, two, three. And as the third one slides in, you rend the head from the body. And number one is gone. A 11 hit points left. Vampire spawn. after that last. That'll be my turn. I'll stay where I am. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com

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Wow. You are so useful. Professor, are you well. You are so useful. Yikes. Oh, look at that zombie. I'm over there. I just attacked zombies.

Is it a sun? Is it the sun? Oh, it's the football skia. Oh. The little ball of skia. Oh, I know. Oh. I'm going to, again, cast my...

Oh, you guys. I'm going to... There's another one. Yeah, I thought there was going to be two. It would me off a little bit. I'm going to again cast my skeletal hand. That dude. Which is the...

Sponautic form. The range of that's the same as all the others, right? And I... Please don't. You can just a little. Do it in mind. It's a crit. It's a natural 20.

I can't. Or I can't. Golf clap. Yeah. No. You don't interrupt the fellow sure. That's fair. I don't want to cause any bad you do.

Well, um, so that's 24 plus two. It's 26. 26 damage to that feller. And then I don't know why I didn't think you do this before. 26? Yeah. You. The chronic, though.

No, it's a crocodile. Okay, or Mavarin. Um, that would be 13. You got... You're up, I think. Shepard. My up. Um...

I already... I already... No, I took three... Fuck it. I'm going to take three sharpshooter attacks on zombies. That's a good idea. Give the ones. That's a good idea.

So that's going to be 23... What is there I see? Eight. Yeah. Both of those heads. And that one hits as well. Probably. What's their HB?

10. Yeah. I get plus 10 to the attack. So then you can get rid of three. There are three cheats. Boom, boom, boom. I picked it random. Sorry if that wasn't what you wanted.

So with zombies normally, or how we normally do those things, and I was going, I couldn't have given them one health and then kept them with their constitution, but I chose to do 10 health to make it better. I think I should have given them. Constitution. Well, no, so they have undead fortitude, which means when you drop them to zero, they roll a Constitution saving throw, and they don't die. But I chose to get rid of that and give them 10 health instead to kind of force you to potentially

have to make multiple turns dealing with them, but you're just such a fucking... Between you and Kahnai is just like, who... There have been a few that we didn't kill. Oh, did my turn? Oh, no, it's the Empire Spons turn. Okay. Everyone around me, so three zombies and one of the... vampire spawn who's grappling

me has to make a deck saving or cognamey. It's grappling you? Natural 20. Correct. Which one is? Oh, the vampire spawn? Yeah, no, fuck that. One of the vampire spawn gets a natural spawning, otherwise they all fail. So they're all going to die.

So the three round me are going to do. Nice. Because I raise my lantern. So the one that got a natural 20? The vampire spore. No, no, the vampire spawn failed. One of the zombies about natural 20. Yeah, just whatever. Yeah, that's fine.

And what is the damage? It was 12. And so the vampire spot. Thanks. Oh. And the night it points. Oh, yeah, there you go. So you raise your lantern and let out a wave of radiant energy and singe two of the zombies

as well as the vampire spot. The other zombies are continuing to shamble about. They are going to continue to head. Well, I don't know, you move back. They're going to turn and make their way directly towards some. Sarnax. You guys? Yeah, they have 20.

And three of them are going to make an attack on Sarnax when they can all get there. Uh, no. That guy can't. Well, he's still diagonally, right? No. This guy's not. No, he can't get there. For 20 feet of movement, right?

Yeah. And two of them are going to attack you. Um, and that is, um, one of them hits doing 14 points of damage. And then the other one is going to attack Kana. And you are not dodging anymore. against the regular attack, and it's going to miss anyway. Okay. Right.

Kana. I will smack the one in my right with my 99, 25 to hit. Snit. We roll ones at two, so fuck me up. All right, we're good. Nine points of slashing. That should kill it. To the one to my right.

Zobby to my right. Do you damage? Or not seven, but this one. Oh, it has 10, so it still has one. 10 point long. Follow up. Finish through. 14?

Yeah. 8.C. We're very slow. 10. There we go. So, yeah, 15 points. And then I will move Bing right there.

And I will, my last third tack will be on the T-O-1 right there. Natural 1 or natural 20. Well done. Well done. Way 2.10. Wow.

I will laugh. It's natural fucking splitting my dudes. It dies. It dies and sterling. Visitor. Move it away. Get out of there. It's the anime slice where it's like sliced, where it's like sliced five second delay and then the head goes.

Yeah. Perfect. That's my turn. Plainting. Oh, my God. The great bar on the planet. This is a 17th. I love beans.

I love beans. I love beans. I have that we're I'm the greatest bar in the world and I'm looking at a sexy goblin the world and the greatest bar in the world Victoria.

Victoria. I gotta have that a tapir and turn. Greatest bar in the world. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't either. I can't want it.

It's a really, it's great. Oh, we're done. You have no idea if you're eating I like breakfast and cheese. I eat. I eat. I'm the greatest bar in the world. You can all eat.

You can all eat. I make Gringo dance when he doesn't want to. I'm shooting a fireball. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, wow. Good dice. Roll a 20, please.

You. Me? That's your turn. That's the six. That's the sixth one. We're good. We're good too. That's enough.

That's enough. 15. We'll get there. That's good for my. It's good for me, please. It's good for my data. 18. That's back.

That's bad. I rolled low. That's bad. That is bad. You clear out the zombies and the vampire spawn around you. And the way you look forward and you see waves and waves of these creatures coming towards you. And you notice that they do seem to notice you as they pull away from the houses and 10 more zombies as well as two more vampires on and make their way direct. Have we progressed at all? Yeah, we're on wave six of that. on wave six, but you haven't physically moved. That is important.

Once we get to 10 waves, we'll fucking book it for doctor. We were being delayed too much. There are too many of them. Sonic set the fuck up. Blam, blam! Blame! Blame! Blame! Blime! Blime! All right, I'll start the first one on the vampire spawn with the Naginato.

26 to hit. Nine points of magical slashing to Vampire 2. Two. On the side. And then... And then I'll do another one for the vampire spot next to him. And make you uncomfortable, and that's the point.

23 hits. It's like uncut. Nice. That's going to be 14 points to this zombie, so he dies. Nice. And then next zombie in line. It's 14 AC, okay? To zombies?

Yes. To zombies? Rorke. All right. That's going to be 12 points of magical slashes. So he's dead. Clayton. against two

against Zombo we'll say Mombone number eight Hey Does anyone remember Mombone number five The vampire spawn One is going to move towards Kana

The other one is going to move towards Victoria I believe I can get there Yeah And they are going to take 20 damage immediately right because of you Correct. It is going to grapple you, Victoria.

The other one is going to grapple, it's going to grapple Connor. That is going to grapple Connor. Wait, hold on. Can I disavant? I'm going to blind the zombie on Victoria. It's... They're already rolling at disadvantage than not zombies. Oh. Oh, that's right.

Yeah. Sorry. And it is going to bite Connor. Maya, your max HP is reduced by 17. And so you are grappled. You are grappled in bitten at Victoria. Big mis. Okay.

The zombies Two of the zombies are going to move up to Victoria If they can get to her The other ones are going to crowd around Sarnax And God Tell those zombies I don't care for these zombies Crowd around me zombies

Come, come And then If it can get to her, yeah The three on Victoria Yes, pretty good And then that one misses So You don't know

Oh, Nicky. 12 for the first hit, and 8 for the second hit. So 20 total for you. Damn, the zombie fit pretty long. And that is taking my total down to? No, these are just all. Both hits Miss Conn. Oh, Ben, there we go.

One hit, one hits Sarnis. Damn. A little Ben. Doing 11 points of damage to Sarnia. I will use my reaction to smack the one that just hit Sarnax. 12 AC, that is. That should obliterate it with a 14. Cool.

All right. So that is Shepherd's turn. I'm going to make three sharpshooter attacks against zombies. Like him in the family. And eight is the AC. Yep. Me, 13 is good. Two hits.

three hits three zombies died and I'm gonna focus on Victoria I want to save her she uh hit me huh

no both and then I continue to rotate and move you are grappled and that's my turn by the vampire and I'm moving to get in the cameras

very cool and that's my turn so three zombies I'm out is is the one with uh I am going to

I am going to um I'm just going to Word of Radiance, so we'll wave my lantern up and say, we don't have time for this. Oh, no, you need to make a saving throw. A con saving throw for all of them, for three zombies, rather.

Three zombies? Oh, the only zombies remaining. You could go here and... Okay, that's right. I'll put it away there. You said con? Yeah. 218. The first two is, and the third one passes.

So two of them back. Okay, two of them are gone. Perfect. That's my turn? All right, Kana. So I'm grappling and bitten, but I can still attack. Yes. I will just keep whacking at the vampire spawn that's in front of me.

27 to hit. Redire one. Is the vampire or the... Vampire spawn. Okay. So 14 points of magical silver slashing to the spawn. How much was that? 14.

Still standing? Yes. Oh, does the vampire may I spot. Second attack. Is a 19 hit? Yep. Yes. It sure goes.

The eight points of magical silver slashing. Okay. Still up. 14 AC. Misses. Okay. That's my turn.

I'll stay there. Clayton. Who killed all my zombies? I was about to do some shepherd. Shepherd got your back. Sheppard. Does the 16 hit a vampire spawn? Yes, it does.

Okay, well, for damage. That kills us. That's pretty. 17, 18, 19, 20. Did this vampire fall on here, fire damage. It's the Vindexam. It's their turn. They take 20 radiant damage.

All right, they both take the radiant damage. One of them is looking significantly worse than the other, but they are still standing. It is going to, it is grappling you, so it is going to attempt to bite you. What have I done? Um, and it's a disadvantage. So there's a one.

Okay. I try again. Remember disadvantage. This one's on common. Sure. It's not. That one is in it. And that one is in it.

Is it the response hitting me? Yes. Okay. 13 points. Um, your max HB goes down by 13. Okay. And that is the vampire response turn. That disadvantage man.

That is the worst. It's helpful. I'll give you that. Is it my turn? It is. I'm going to continue choking this glial with my skeletal hands. I'm not going to get a 14th place. Oh, my favorite.

Yeah. It's pretty good, Mike. That's pretty good. Thanks, Andy. I was on the one of two of those. No, it was good. I like it. Zombies are up.

The zombie there is one zombie. It is going to attack Kana. And he's going to miss. Shepard This guy's real weak I'll take three shots at a sharpshooter to zombie one

to vampire spawn one We'll do the first one Yeah, don't be all three There's a good chance on this They have higher A-C, but I'm taking the risk By that I mean I'll hit a five, which is going to be A 13 Four

Vampire Spawn 1 Another one is going to be 23, 26, 21. Vampire spawn number two, which is going to be three plus 16, 19 points of damage to Vampire Spawn 1? It's number one, yeah.

So you let loose your blasts towards it and you are able to... One misses, one hits, and the last one's gonna go to zombie one. Okay. Which is going to be a 15 to hit, 10 points of damage, he's dead, and that's my turn.

All right. And then I can seem to cycle closer... I'm going to... Just raise my lantern and cast a deck-saving crow, sacred flame. He fails. Was that 3D8? Yeah. Oh, 16 plus 2 is 18 plus 5 is 23 points of gradient.

You let loose your bolt of 8 radiant energy and you are able to smite where it stands. All right. Whoever's next. Me? There's so many of them. Seven. Yikes. Yikes.

You got a seven on the seventh round. Please roll a deep one for me. We've been more very poorly. Yeah. I've got to bring up. Right. I mean, 21. Right.

Oh, my gosh. Yeah, once again, you are swarmed by ten more zombies and two more vampires far. I wish we could accept the turn orders. I would just, I would just fucking obliterate. Yeah. And if I didn't have shit, I could, I could obliterate them. But it doesn't make sense.

sense, right? I don't want to waste my action con to kill like half of them, right? Right? That's exactly that's exactly how I feel. I'll continue to pick them off. I'll give a shit all. It's not a new. All day long. I don't know. Sorry, sorry. You were five. Or no, seven.

Connor. Oh, you haven't seen the last of me yet. And I will take the dog action. I don't even know what that. I don't give it. Shut the fuck up. Son X. What have you got yourself into? But I don't hear that.

The Kana turns around and cuts Sorax head off with one swift swipe. Just one of these. I think I'll firebolt the... This guy. Big fella? Where's my little D-Tal? He knows pretty well. Focus on the big fellas.

I'm going to wipe out the other ones. I'm tired of this. 16 fire damage. Okay. Vampire spawn. Clinton was going to go, right? Clayton went. So that we're really going to take

Twainting. Okay. So they take that. One of them is going to move towards Sarnax, the other one towards Kana. Okay. And it is going to grapple you,

Sarnax. It's going to touch to bite you. Oh, fuck. And it is going to bite you. It's already disadvantage, right? They're already disadvantage. It's already disadvantage. It is divit.

12 points of damage, necrotic damage, and you're lowered by 12 max HP. The other one is going to attempt on Kana. It is at disadvantage, and it is going to grapple you. And it is also going to bite you. I got a natural 20, but it was negated. Oh, Jesus. seven points of necrotic damage. Is this also reduced your max?

Yes. Okay. So I'm going to make it here. I will use my reaction to Sentinel attack the one that hits Sarnax. Okay. Bloody. All right. Here we go.

Here we go. Here we go. There we go. So that's going to be 11 plus 11. You know what's really horrible? And I don't know if this is a testament to how poorly I am as a DM. but your far more horrified of Maya getting natural 20 than any of the things

that I threw at you in combat. I can't think of many more. I can't think of many more. How much was the damage? So that's 2D10, 12s 5. So, 11, 16 points of magical slashing. All right. Two, though, one on this side.

And it grapples and bites into Sarnax's neck. You reach out and slash out and doing a bit of damage. Victoria. Okay. Focus on big follow. I don't want to. Two is the one that's closest to you. He's going to take care of all of them.

Uh, peckles. All right, fine. I'm going to skin a little hand, but I'm going to twin it and do both of them. Oh. How's the... Sorry. When I twin, do I roll damage separately? Yeah, two attacks.

Two separate spell tax. So they vote, I got a 16 to 17. Those set. So the one closest to me. Oh, makes. Number two? Yikes. Oh, that's 13.

It's the one that I hit, yeah. So 13 to the one closest to me, number two. Thank you so much. And 20 to the one that's number one. Sheppard. Without meta-knowledge, do I feel like we're at least making progress? Looking around, you can see that as these waves are coming at you, they're moving away from the buildings, a significant chunk of,

this row is cleared out, they're just coming to you instead of forcing you to come to that. Do I feel as though that we have still a ways to go to Walker House? Yes. Okay. Then I'll aim for this one, Vampire One. That's number one. Vampire one. I will make, uh, I'm going to slayers spray it and make two normal attacks.

Okay. First two attacks were better. I scoop them up. Uh, it's going to be a 20th. Three. Yes. And a 14th. 14 messes.

And by that, I mean, it's a national once in a maximum maximum missile. Yeah. So one of those is going to hit. Man, my first two attacks were great. That's okay. That's going to be five, six plus six is 12 damage to number one. You let loose one of your arcane blast. These zombies are crowding in.

They're coming from all angles as you're looking around. One of your both flies off and hits the side of a building. One does land its target and it does a bit of damage. That's my dear. The zombies now, three of them are going to move in on. Victoria and the other ones are going to circle around Sarnax and Kana. Oh my gosh. I'll take this walk in here.

Okay, so all three of them miss on Kana. Three miss on Kana. Yep. Oh my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm sorry. I imagine that. And one of them is our Sarnak.

I'm going to try to wind it. It's a reaction. It still hits. Got it. Four six points of damage. Flashing. Yep. And then three on Victoria, I believe.

Thank you for the correct. That's what's there. Natural 20. Got you have a hitch. Oh, I should have a hitch. Oh, I shouldn't be. So only two of them are on these. Yeah.

One can't make it. Okay, so then one natural 20 and one hicks. My second guy was a natural. Sure. So eight for the first hit. That's the non-natural. And then 19 for the second hit. And that is the zombie's turn.

It's our next. I'm just going to look around and all of this. You are just only delaying the inevitable and cast radiance. Everyone, every single person needs to, oh, actually, I think every single one needs to make a

Consumnsaving. Including the two and around. Every single unit needs to make a con-saving throw. No, every bad guy. Wow, wee. 17? No, 18. 18th, 18th.

So the zombies can't So I'll do the vampire spawn because the zombies are aren't simply dead. They can't. They can't. I did more than $20. So it'll just be halved. So they'll all just be halfed. Oh, okay. So all the zombies are dead. So then I will roll for the two vampire spawn. Yep.

One of the vampire spawn passes and the yes, both vampires. No, one of the vampire spawn fails. Okay, so that is 15 plus 9 is 24 points if they failed of rating damage and 12 with them

passed if they're not vulnerable I think so. There were some special to rate here, but it was. It has to do with whether they can be held back. Oh shit. So you didn't need a product then. And then your, what was it

if they passed? 12. The one that is on so number one, which is the one closest just to Maya is on Maya. The other one's on you, the one that was on you passed. So, just so weird, though. It's one and two.

Perfect. Connor, which one looks weak for the two? The one that is grappling with you. On the left? Mm-hmm. I will make a attack against it. 20 meters. That'll be 14 points of natural slashing.

You take your weapon. and you slice beneath your arm up through it and you split the vampire spawn into what falls the ground. Oh, fuck. Okay. Nice down. We keep you track, shepherd. Yeah, we're keeping track.

Oh, is this a war to see you? I haven't been keeping track. I slayers for it. I try to slay the one that is weakest. Sorry. Do you think, baby, whatever it? So, 19 of the other one. We roll one.

That'll be nine points, magical silver slabshoe in the other one. Damn. All right, get it, girl. And then is it still up? It is. 14 misses. Okay, that's my turn. Clayton.

One left, right? We'll see a big girl. Yeah, 15? That hits. Oh. I'm barely good. Seriously? Yeah, 14 missed.

Oh, then I'm gonna fucking let it rip. Yeah. I shouldn't even fucking the slice for it, honestly. 11. It's now its turn. It's going to take 20 damage. It is barely hanging on as it's holding onto you.

You can hear it silence as it's breathing, its raspy breath, breathing against your neck. Oh, it's just in, oh, fuck. Yeah, it's grappling you. So it's going to use its things to bite you. I can't. This is the danguie. And it is going to hit for the first bite. I use my reaction to smack.

Ten points of necrotic damage and you're down ten points. And remember, it can not regain health. I know. Sentinel reaction, 27 to hit. It'll take 13 points of magical silvercloth. You watch as it goes in to make its next bite, but Kana brings her blade around slicing its head off. It is now dead. Oh, thank you.

I am not feeling very well. We gotta keep moving to the lady walker. We can't be fucking around here. I'm gonna be dead by the time we get that. Roll. Wait. Wait. Oh,

when she says that, I'm gonna reach in my pack and throw her a health potion. The last one that I have. It is a normal health potion. I literally toss it to you. Don't we still have our potions of invulnerability? That's not of us in use.

I don't have that in my inventory. I know. I know. I know. a normal health potion I toss to the Victoria. Maybe have you used yours all? I use mine, yes. I don't have any...

Natural 20. Oh, hey. Great. Thank God. You watch as... I am going to drink help with me. You watch as... You watch as the zombies and the other vampires

are looking from the side at what's happening. Some of the vampire spawns skitter off to the side. They seem to be... running in fear as you begin to run as quickly as you can down the pathway after house after house. And as you move past them, the creatures flee and are pushed backwards, running, climbing over the walls, heading further out into the forest. You've repelled a huge chunk of the roadway.

You are slowly approaching the crossroads that makes your way to lady vactors. Do we know roughly in the distance? is it miles hundreds of feet No, it's hundreds of feet. Probably like 1500s. As soon as you round the corner, I scream Lady Watna, we're coming for you. Do you roll even?

I roll six. All right. Thank you. You continue along. Shepherd is angry. The rust color of her skin is ever deepened by the rage on his face as he let loose blast after blast.

Kana at his back spinning around making sure to keep him safe while he lets loose his blast Victoria and Clayton off to the side fire bolts and chill touch flying every which way and all the while Sarnax walking in the middle holding up the light

shunning the vampire spawn turning the undead as you make your way to the crossroads and you turn shepherd you let out this yell and you see down the lane as she turns and looks towards you She's about 1,500 feet from you, but she sees you. And she acknowledges what you say.

You hear as a laughter bubbles up out of her. And she says something, but it is drowned out by the screams and the houses around you. There's still a long stretch ahead of you before you can reach her. Whoever's next? Anna, lead us home. This is the last one. One way or another. I mean, we like you, but don't fuck it up.

You rolled four, five. I was just kidding. I was just kidding. Please roll a D20. I was just teasing. We still like you. 100? We still like you.

We almost had perfect five and five. Uh, 91. Okay. There you go. You, you, um, you look as her eyes stay trained on you, shepherd as she begins to raise one arm in the other. You feel the ground shaking beneath your feet is a hand. Rips up out of the earth and another and another and another I need you to dump the entire bag out on the playing field around you Shitting skeleton after skeleton after skeleton after all around you

Oh Sarnax is Garex with us this night Well I used all my shit Well fuck well well fuck oh Yeah um um Um if somebody makes way for me I mean An 80-foot Comey is ridiculous. So, yes, you

can move through them. It is not considered difficult training to you. Because it's not considered magical. You will, they will take opportunity. I don't give a fuck. Let's fucking go. All right. Kana.

I'm going to take out my Pikes of Haunted. Okay. And I will play the first song that comes to mind which is we need the song from the original

Pokemon movie. So every creature within 30 feet of me Yeah, fucking make way. Which is basically everyone, but I think they do roll together. Yes, which is one roll. DC-15 wisdom saving throw. We fail.

Yes! For one minute, they're frightened for me. They're frightened of me. All right. We're good. We're good. We're good. All right. I don't have anything to do. Can you Bigby's hands? I mean,

he can't do shit because he's fucking, he's tapped, man. He's more tapped than any wizard I've ever played in my fucking life, man. He's so fucking tapped. I'll just firebolt the guy right in front of me, I guess. What a nightmare. You just got a firebought him? So that is a 20 they hit?

Sorry, you can entertain. Yeah, no, that hits. They have one hit point, so it's scar. Oh, okay. So this guy... Their AC is also 8 as well. Okay. I'm going to choose this general chunk.

Okay. And cast shatter. Okay. So you will hear, like, the sound of a mirror being shattered. It will ring out and be a really piercing noise. And 60 feet will have to make a duck to saving throw. Wait, 60 feet diameter? Oh, I'm sorry.

Hold on. whoa, whoa, blah, blah, blah, blah, but... It's 10 feet. I'm sorry. 10 feet, not 60 feet, though. So you can pick a four by four blocks somewhere. 10 foot radius. So, yeah, a four by four block.

Okay. Yeah, so I'll do a four by four in this area. I think it's very reasonable. Because it's right in front of you. And does it do you half damage if they fail? I believe it fails. 3D8 or half, yeah. All right, then all of them are obliterated.

So four by four-by-full shattered bone dust. Yes. Then I was wrong. You watch as Victoria reaches her hand out. She looks towards one and she squeezes her fists together, and you hear the cracking of bone before you see it as a mass of them. Oh, that's fantastic. The mass of them cracks and shatter in the bone dust.

If they're afraid, they have disadvantaged. I'll have a further flavor that from now on. I'm going to let out just piercing screen. piercing scream, or piercing scream. The most unsubal orgasm. The orgasm. The orgasm. That's the most one I can make.

And it is the skeletons. So the skeletons, those that are out there are going to move all the way in. They're going to continue. Oh, they can't. They are going to stand there and they can do nothing. What's the range? Oh, I'm also after that happens.

I'm going to... I need all of you to make a not constitution, a dexterity saving droves. Oh, speaking my language, big. let's go. Dex, you say. 17. Thank fucking God.

I'm not going to text. You're trying to get a 15. 19. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. If you fail, you are not prone as you were being trampled

and bludgeoned. You should twist that. You should twist that. So they're not in a van. Or they throw out, and all that you'll be. Because they're crawling at one thing. They don't do individual attacks.

Famous. It's like a mob. So. They're like, vibrating, you have to make the thing to see if they knock you down and they're bludgeon you and trampling you. If you fall, you take damage. If you pass, you take nothing. I'm taking those long.

God, dame. You both fail. Twice. Oh, you fucked. Sorry, I'm getting ready. No, you're good. Don't move. He's so sad.

You take 25 points of bludgeoning and piercing damage as you are not crone and you are being stompled and trampled by these. Stumpled. stomp-stalleled by these skeletons. I'm being stalled about you. Wait, it was Victoria. I thought it was Clayton. It's both of my fault. I'm being stungled by Dickie.

It's Dickie time. No, Dickie, no. I'm able to move through friends uninhibited. Yes. It's a difficult turn. What's the atmosphere like, Nikki? What does the terrain look like, Nikki? It's a mom of skeletons.

But we're in a street? Yes. That's not my favorite terrain. Fuck it. So 510, 15, 20, 25, 30. I take three opportunity attacks. They don't do opportunity attacks. And I unleash the hellfire.

Like, there has never been a fucking hellfire in anyone's fucking life ever. Are we percussive? Yes. Yes. It is an 80 foot home. Depending on how you want to do that, it's either going to be all of it. this or all of this. You picked your poison.

It's either the cone in front. Give me a markers for you get more. So seeing seeing my, seeing my friends down, it's going to be all of this. Just mark off. Oh, no, you go, I'm going to go. You can mark on. On the job. Yeah, you may want to.

Yeah, you got it. You got it. You got it. You got it. Done. D.C. deck saving throw 10 for you my friend oh great

you have to be fucking they have don't they if they pass so they're all dead as long as I don't roll literally ones on every roll no no no they all have they at least one day down right every single I don't know anyway I don't know I want to roll

you sure yes I'm very sure so how harm no I mean they physically can't all of them all the way out oh my god You watch. Nice job, sir.

As almost as if it is in human. It is a strange barrage, a magical barrage of shit. It almost doesn't seem possible. Yes, it literally goes as I mowed them all down. You watch as the skeletons grab at Victoria and Clayton, they yell as they're pulled down into this mass of skeletons, as they're stomping and trample. pulling on them. You move, you

roll backwards, leap to your feet. You pull out, you look down at redemption, having used it before, and you reach for judgment. As you grab it, you let the hammer go. As you rain hellfire along this mass of skeletons. You watch as one, two, three, a hundred of these skeletons fall around you. And your aim is

uncanny, otherworldly, hellish. is you look and you're able to miss every single one of your friends. Get up! Professor! Victoria! Get the fuck up! Sorry, Max. As I'll say, well done, Shepherd, I look, I check my road for holes.

Oh, it's fine. And I'm going to step forward as my lantern swirls around, and I'm going to hold it off and cast burning hands. Catch these burning hands. I'm going to do a 15-foot cone. Can I get in that little, yeah. That little corner? Yeah, right there.

Do you want to start here, or do you want to start here? back and back right there. And I'll do a 15-foot cone, Rich. Can you or somebody help me out? Yeah. They fail. So you can just be riddle. You can just be riddened. Yeah, he's talking about a 15-foot cone from his portion. So this is half and a half, so they're dead. Okay.

Because it covers half their square. Yep, that's true. And then it's like this and this. And then it's this and this. Yeah, I think you're safe to look. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, that's good. Judge as it is, right? that one might be out.

Oh, these are both done. So, five, ten. Survival went there, but you're... That's how it would be there and there. All right, all right, right. That's fair? Was that removed or push? No.

This was there. Okay, that's good. Top of the round, I need you to roll in D6 for me. I should roll it, but I'm going to make you do it. Boom. You, somebody. You roll in these six. Stop there off.

Fuck me! No! I got a six and we'll die. Thanks, Mike. Two. Perfect. You're good. Oh, that is so...

It's even! Yeah. I will move around to this side. I know it's just, um, Victoria looked weakened to me. I am bleeding heavily. I look all fucked up. Do you take the potion?

Yes, I did. Okay. I just didn't know we saw you do that. Did they pass their same? Yeah, I drank it while we were walking. Oh, that's right. I'm sorry. Wisdom 15.

Oh, they got it. They are not only reviewed. Okay. Besides, I'm afraid I don't have anything to help you, but I will try to fend these off for you. I will make my first attack against this one. There's one in front of me. And they have one hit point.

So long that one goes away. Those two more in the back. Maybe vomit a little bit. I have two. So I counted how many skeletons Andy killed? You'll never believe me. 69 exactly yes

it's almost like it was April 20th nice nice um holy 420 609 I will

um I think it would have been more if I got a better position it would have been more the problem was my position was was compromised

positioning is tough man it's a balance of um um I'm Just because I fear for my friends, I will action search and I will play one more tune out of the thing of things.

Thing of Things. The Pipe's of Haunting. So they have to gather DC-15 wisdom safe. And they got it. All right. Doles. I tried. Do-d-d-d-d-doo.

Do-da-do. Do-da. Do-da. Do-da. Yeah, I love epic saxon. That's all my streaming was. That's all my stream. Azran, you're out of songs.

Would I move here? For, um... I'll stand up. I will move back. I'll stand in front of her, protectively. Thank you, come. I'll stay, like, here.

Atrad. I'll stay, like, here. It's fine. I will shoot a firebolt, I guess, at this skeleton to try to... 16 to hit. That is? Victoria.

I will half my movement stand up. And I will, Polly. I'm just going to shoot two fire bolts. I'm going to twin the spell and try to just pick these two off behind Shepard. How many points you got left? A great mini none. Oh, you go.

None. Do you throw four points left? Oh, no, I've got four points. Eight. Eight is there. Oh, yeah, okay. So then they should both die, and I am going to... Because they made their save on the second time I played it,

they are now immune for 24 hours from the parks. From the fights. Gotcha. And it is their turn. I need you all to make a security saving drop. 15. Is it easy? 17.

Fail on eight. 15. Hold on, hold up, hold up, sorry. I'm going to twist it because I'm about to tie. Oh, 23. If we wipe them out, they're not really around us anymore. They're moving into you. They're not completely wiped out.

So you can move them in, they're packing it around you. And this isn't necessarily a one-v-one kind of thing until the top are considered. I'm pressing. Okay, so you have a bomb thing from, uh, you twisted twice. You twisted twice? Yes. Yes. Yes.

Very much strong. Either you took one out. Okay. So can you think too that for me? I just did. We have two left. Oh, Kyle, we're running out a twist. Like twice this game?

Just back. Okay. So who's failed? I fail. Not this day. If you are failed, you are not prone and you will take 10 points of damage. Is this non-magical bludgeoning? It is, you know, they're just whacking you with their bones.

So for me, it's heavy armor mask. Yes. Yes. Okay. Perfect. And it is Shepard's turn. Through normal attacks, I focus on the, the ones that are swarming Clayton and Victoria. So that's going to be a... Kana and Clayton, you're prone. Yep. I'm going to, uh, so that's going to be a 16 and an 18. Oh, that's it? And a shitload. So three of them die. Yep. Thank you. And that's my whole fucking turn. Perfect. I can't move. Um, sorry next. How's Connor looking?

That was fine. Down on the ground. On my ass, but I feel fine. I will save you, Kana. Also, Dodge. I will cast once again burning hands to wipe out as many as possible. I'll take two opportunity attacks from skeletons.

They don't do opportunity to? Oh, that's right. So, whatever can do the most, get rid of the most. You can probably get rid of, like, it's a 15-foot cone Yeah Probably this

Yeah I do that And Connie you need to make a dexterity saving throw And Shepard Which is at disadvantage In my room? Yes No you are yeah Oh no no no Comma should be fine

Comma's fine just Shepard Okay What do I have to do? Dexiety saving throw And your resistant So. My function The resistance

Okay so you are going to take a little bit of damage button But I know that you're fine That's fine And the other one's not I'll take half of it I need somebody to roll a D6 Swarming, please?

Somebody roll with D6. Got it? Four. Okay, you're good. Anything that like... I'll roll the damage later, that's my turn. Okay. Just let me know how much I take.

You have an action spell. Kana. I owe your movement together. Five feet of movement together because I have the athlete's feet. Bada-Bing, bada-bong. 11 points of fire-d-hame. Done. So fast.

Got it. Listen, stick around if you like feet because I've got the athletes feet. Spelled F-E-A-T, you don't get too excited. I don't think anyone was excited. I don't think so that. All right. Make an attack on this guy. Ooh, natural one, so that misses.

20, so he's gone. He's gone. Third attack on the white one in front of me, 27, so he's gone. And I will just turn face the other two and stand there over Clayton. I will shoot this one. Okay. He's dead.

All right, I will shoot this one. Okay. We have two laughs. I need you to make a dexterity saving program. Just for these two guys? Who? As long as there's somebody that exists, it's considered a mob. So each one of those doesn't represent one zombie.

Right, right. Just that remembers their how it's a point. What is the save again? 15. All right. I got a 27. But I will say, as you dwindle the mob, the dice. I don't know.

A significant amount. So I think it's just two of you. Eight. Should I twist that again? No. Okay. You got to save it to watch. So you, both of you,

fall prone, and you're going to take five points of budgeting damage. You got one H-D. Oh, I forgot she's weak as fuck. My bad. I forgot she's fucking dead as shit. My bad, my bad. I can't see her headpoints.

Nobody in the fucking chat tells her hip points. I can't fucking see him. Yeah, we can't see his room. I've got nothing for me. I was your turn. There are a tiny little stradong swirling around my head. shots of the zombies and reserve the right

to have a free speech interaction. Yes. Okay. Okay. All right. So that's going to be a fucking 24. That's going to be a fucking 32. Let's do it. So they're both that. They're both that. I'd be happy to roll in case I... Your free voice interaction.

My fourth free voice interaction is as I'm literally pow, pow, pow, I'm turning me over my shoulder and saying, what don't we're coming for you? And I continue to proceed. Because I am fucking You, the swarm of skeletons that rumble out of the ground, they overtake you. You're dropped over and over again, but you fight your way through it with one blast after another. All of you helping each other to get through it. And as the smoke of the smoking guns fades and you look down the long street towards Vaukscher house,

you see Lady Vaukcher standing there. on either side of her, two ghoulish entities, and behind her, the large mass of flesh. She steps to the side. I've been waiting for you to come back. You see, it is time now for you to meet my husband. Honey, handle them. And as she steps to the side, you watch. is the shambling golem made up of not just Lord Wachter,

but bits and pieces of others. And you see as he moves forward that there is a skull, there is a head on his chest as it moves towards you. You see a face wracked in pain, a face you recognize as one of the young, as one of the young acolytes that you met in the basement. And you realize it's not just him, but all of those that you saved are now amalgamized

into this one creature is it begins to move forward and shamble towards you. The ground around you begins to shake and you see once again zonguified hands coming up out of the earth and that is where we'll end the session. Fuck! Wow! It looks like Lady Vokter cannot let sleeping dead husband's lie. At this point, she really should move on. Think of this smell.

All the same, the flesh abomination should prove useful in this apocalypse of the walking dead. It is the hour of death, and I am death's master. Will the Asran expedition survive the widow's wrath? Find out in Chapter 15 of Curse of Stradania, something wicked. In the meantime, if you wish to watch Legends of Adventress tell similar stories of Dungeons and Dragons every week, you can follow us on Twitch. You can also enjoy our many campaigns on YouTube, support us on Patreon, and join our community on Discord. links are in the show notes. We welcome you for aventress family.