Legends of Avantris - Heart's Desire | One-Shot | A Bilgewater Tale: Part 2

Episode Date: March 18, 2025

Welcome to Bilgewater, an unscrupulous port city unlike anywhere else in Runeterra. It’s as lawless as the sea and the wind that surround it and that’s the way the sinners and scoundrels that live... there like it. It’s one hell of a place to make your fortune, and it can be made in the blink of an eye, just as fast as your ambitions can be shattered, sending it down the drain into the chum-filled Bloodharbor. Here in Bilgewater, if you have coin, you can seek out whatever your heart desires, and you’ll probably find it. But remember, everything has a price.   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/0sHBp8wamAQ?si=rgLn9sxyvYhsjAAr

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to Legends of Aventress. We need compass at Ruby I's. Ruby I woman headmast. That was what I remembered. Comprehensive floats. Just as a point of note, you're inspired for 10 minutes. Okay, perfect. Just play it up.
Starting point is 00:00:22 I will jump in. I'm going to run down to the, like, down the, he's very confident. Down to whatever that thing is and jump off of it and try to, like, land on the Ruby's whatever. You see it's just a masthead, it's just the woman rising up. And so the rest of the wreck is beneath the surface. Is it a hand motion man?
Starting point is 00:00:41 Can someone clip that? We'll at least jump and try to grab it onto the, wait, so it's a separate mast, right? It is a mass head, yeah. Yeah. What's the girt of the mast? The girt. Is there your strength.
Starting point is 00:00:56 Yep. Is it an average girty mass? Is it a, or a, Um, girthy. It's pretty girthy, but you give the sense you can try to grapple it. How chody is this man? Are you gonna jump?
Starting point is 00:01:09 Extremely. Just ignoring all of you and just asking wrong what he's doing. I would like to jump. It's my easiest to do us. You do that. So how does, so you can clear a gap of 30 feet? Yeah, I mean, it's based on strength
Starting point is 00:01:24 and so I think that it's what, like, if you lost it on. Is it on here in a Gensk? Sometimes it is. I don't think the jumping rules are. I'll say make an athletic check and we'll see how you do. Yeah, that works too. I do have inspiration.
Starting point is 00:01:38 You're pretty good. 13. Thank you. Plus, it is pretty good. Clips dab the thing. What's the name of that? Oh, transparent. Long transparent clips dad the thing.
Starting point is 00:01:50 Well, it's not working. Plus eight is 21. 21. You see Braun get a running jump and he leaps forward. You actually see with how your ship is tilting up. You can actually see. get a bit of distance, and you manage to grab and you cling as your shield slams against this wood of this mast head.
Starting point is 00:02:12 You see the ruby eyes of this woman emerging from the shell and staring almost directly at you, as you see the wreck that's sunk very deep below in the choppy water. What do you see? Friends, I think we need to go down. What are we looking for again? Our compass.
Starting point is 00:02:34 The compass. The ship is underwater. You're very cute. You know that, right? I know it. I start taking my cape off and trying to get as light as possible to prepare to dive into the water. Would... who else? Should we all go in?
Starting point is 00:02:56 This cape is going to weigh me down and I'm going to probably drown if I go so many. Birds don't do so well on the water? Yeah. I don't know how to swim. All right, I'll go with you. The three of us, stay. Okay. All right, hold this, and I will chuck my shield
Starting point is 00:03:14 30 feet if I get. Just fling it back on the ship. I'll say you're able to do that. You just chuck it, you eat it, and you ought to dodge out of the way and clatters to the ship. And so I need athletic checks from both of the divers. Divers. It's the three of us, right?
Starting point is 00:03:36 We're going in. Three divers. Athletics? Oh, thank God. Three divers. It's a 16 for me. 16, that passes? 15. 15, that passes.
Starting point is 00:03:46 You both get running, jump side by side, and you all manage to land and ground. You guys are diving. Oh, I thought I was dying in the water. Yes. Never mind. Are you not as well? I'm not getting sliding onto the shield.
Starting point is 00:03:56 Got it. So you are all, you all managed to land near Brom and you see as you're able to, slide down into the water. Oh, it's kind of risk. I'll doing them. Mm-hmm. Okay.
Starting point is 00:04:13 I'm gonna start swimming down and looking for the compass. I'll keep an eye out for, you know, bags. So you all join together, and so you dive down deeper and deeper. I need everyone to make perception checks disadvantaged as the murkiness of the water. Can I make one for a lot? For me.
Starting point is 00:04:31 I'd say you can't even see it as it's so hard. it's so hard. I got an eat. What are you doing, were you looking like in the wreckage or were you trying to look out for baddies? I was looking sort of like around the area. You guys just make and see if any dangers coming? Yeah, just keep an eye on the area.
Starting point is 00:04:46 I'm assisting, Timo. Well, I see no thing. How reflective is the water? A real advantage. It's pretty reflective. The clouds are still there. Is looking at the water and checking like his hair. You can definitely get a look.
Starting point is 00:04:57 You can get a look at yourself. Can I sit down on the boat and do primable awareness? Sure. Is this considered my favorite train? One of my favorite trains is coastal. I would say, yeah. This would count as coastal. Then I need to know if there's any aberrations, celestial, dragons, elemental, fey, fiends are undead within six miles of my current location.
Starting point is 00:05:17 Six mile. Six mile. Damn. I don't get to know what or how many or where. Celestials and aberrations. And fe and fe. And fey. And fey.
Starting point is 00:05:30 Picks. And perception. Oh shit. I got an 11. 11? 9. As you go down deeper and deeper, and deeper, and you actually manage to see the,
Starting point is 00:05:45 you manage to see as you're all going, you're staying close enough to each other. You see that there is far down below, further than it should be, almost swallowed by the darkness of the sea. You see the bottom half of this same, very same ship, and you see that it was once a cargo freighter,
Starting point is 00:06:05 and you see that there's remnants of treasure chests. It had insane hall as you dive deeper and deeper. But you can't find what you're looking for as you enter this strange hall that has all of these bizarre-looking crates and chests. Some seeming ancient artifacts, things out of perhaps archaeology books that you may have studied, Fiorea.
Starting point is 00:06:38 As you look around for anything, and you're immediately, it takes you a long time, longer than it should, as you start to almost kind of feel something kind of slithering around your ankles and your limbs, as you see wispy black tendrils, Not unlike that you had seen with a Nautilus,
Starting point is 00:07:05 start to slither out all of you and need you all to make straight saving credits. Plus three. And I'm no one to reach. Natural. A five. This is the first bad role I've had all night. I got a 14 with all of my bonuses.
Starting point is 00:07:23 A 14. Yeah. You get it. Ha ha. I do, I use that. Can I have the coin back when you have chance? Oh, the coin, yes. Oh, the coin, yes.
Starting point is 00:07:34 I don't know if 14 is gonna be enough. Eight plus seven? Wait, eight plus seven. This is bad news. I got you. Come back, pet. Do I, with my, I rolled a 20 for like out of the water perception. Can I see, do I see anything?
Starting point is 00:07:48 I would say you look and you see that although there are razor fins and sharks in the water, they seem to be all going and just devouring the sailors that were on your crew. There seem to be away from this wreck. And they actually, you actually see, though they're long dead. No time for the. But you actually see that this dark,
Starting point is 00:08:05 This darkness around this strange wreck, the animals seem to be staying away from that. Oh, interesting. As these eldridge tendrils. So what do you get? A 19. A 19. You see as Draven,
Starting point is 00:08:17 it starts to slither around your calf as both of you for an instant, see Draven starts to get pulled. Ha ha, fuck. What are you guys doing? I'm immediately diving down and I'm gonna try and grab Draven and slash at the tendons. Both of you make acrobatic checks
Starting point is 00:08:33 to see if you can get to him. And none of us up on the thing, see any of this? No, this is a good whole. How long have they been down there? Probably only a few minutes. Or like one minute. Dirty 20. Okay.
Starting point is 00:08:45 Horrible. Fiora, you managed to grab onto Dravon and yank him free as your ankle is now free. However, you make a percentage check at advantage now. As you've been dragged along toward the crate. I got a 20. A 20. Draven is now where you see
Starting point is 00:09:04 this, you hadn't really noticed before, but in the direction where you had been pulled, you look down, and you'd see, just as the slithering dark tendrils pulled away, you see an what looks like a stone box, but with strange carvings that look absurdly ancient and pulse with a very faint turquoise glow. I'll point to and start to swim to it, like make sure that they have the, I have their attention and point towards the box. You're easily able to get the attention as you swim down and you find, you do literally that.
Starting point is 00:09:43 As you slugs too, the Johnny Bravo. And you grab it and you almost feel the power in your hand as you open it. And it is, make the stone, it pulses with this, this energy, and you feel it in your hands. And you see that there's a little lash and you're able to flick it open and it opens into a strange stone compass
Starting point is 00:10:06 that seems to be still working, the needle of it glowing of that same turquoise color. I like show them and I flex in affirmation that this is what we have and I begin to swim up. I like to the surface flex, like. I just, I get beneath and I just shove his feet up so to propel him towards the surface and I'll swim after him. So you all are able to do this with this compass in tow.
Starting point is 00:10:32 as you make your way back to the ship. And it's just at this point where all of the razor fins and sharks are starting to lose interest in the sailors and they dart in your direction, but you're easily able to hop on, hop aboard. And so you are able to show everyone what you go. Here it is, and I throw it onto the dock of the boat. All right, mission accomplished.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Oh, it's a thingy. It's a compass. It's a bus swim thingy. Life is good, eh? There's work? Something that was down there that almost took driving with him to the depths. It wasn't even close. Hello, Dice Pryor.
Starting point is 00:11:15 Thanks for the raid. Hey, playing Dungeons & Dragons fifth edition in the world of Roont Air, the world of League of Legends. So if you enjoy League of Legends and D&D, you came to the right spot. Thanks so much again, Diceprite for the Raid. We love you all. We sure do.
Starting point is 00:11:29 Ha-hao. Ha-ha-how! You... Thanks, Kima! You all are staring at it, and then suddenly you hear the jingling, slight clink of a coin as it taps against something, and a loud creak,
Starting point is 00:11:52 as you all notice a shape behind you. Well done. As you all turn and you see the river king, standing his large belly protruding from his waistcoat, as he has a single gold coin that he plays with through his fingers. Now, I can't say I wasn't expecting that, but you know, Nautilus,
Starting point is 00:12:23 he's always carving up the ships of the greedy, the kind that come to sail through these waters. But y'all put him to sleep. That ought to give him a... When I snooze for a year or two, he'll be back, though. He looks dead. Is he not dead? No, what is dead may never die, friend.
Starting point is 00:12:49 Box, that's a thing called Draper. Hi, Alexa. And that's the thing while they called him in all words. Funny things. I look like, shy, Drake. I know, I can't, my mustache is going to explode off my face. Staying held together with lash blue and...
Starting point is 00:13:10 Dreams. Thank you for the follow, Zinat, Nasi, Juman. But y'all have done a good thing, putting an end to that. Menace, at least for a bit. Whoever Nautilus was in ages long past, water forgets the names of the drown, so Nautilus will have to do. And he takes the coin, and he pockets at it.
Starting point is 00:13:34 You can see there's a little... little bit of a bulge in one of his waistcoat pockets. As Draven is a little confused as to how you got out here. Well, boy, I said the world's a river and there ain't no place I can't go. So why not just retrieve the compass for Captain Fortune yourself? Because things aren't that simple. We're dealing with God. What is a king, river, or otherwise?
Starting point is 00:14:05 to a god. All I know is I'd better get my money, fame, and fortune. Boy, you'll have more than that. The attention and the adoration of all your people. But now you all have the bargaining chip. This next trial, shouldn't be too difficult now that you have that little thing. He too frequents these waters. also praying and on the greedy
Starting point is 00:14:43 but he tricks some leads him to their doom it's dashed against these rocks and reefs a feast for the harpies and the souls of dead sails a true banquet of misery and then he's the only one that can take you to the serpent's heart and that is why I cannot go
Starting point is 00:15:05 it is hidden by godly magic Only a creature of the sea or storm can get through and guide you. For I am just a humble being of river. I'm afraid I cannot go. I cannot penetrate those magists. I admit weakness among friends.
Starting point is 00:15:32 I hope you will not hold that against me. See, I am an honest catfish, an honest gentleman. And I am bearing all children. bearing all to you as I bear my team. I drew a picture of a fish in the algae, but I gave it big lips. Like a what? Cock.
Starting point is 00:15:58 No, unnaturally big lips, like this. I see that. You're gonna enjoy this next one. Battle takes its toll on the mind. What do mean? I cannot wait for this stuff. The enormity of that hat does not hide the vacancy beneath it, I can see. No.
Starting point is 00:16:27 But. I didn't say anything funny. He just put his two bright cells to figure out what. What y'all need to do next is when this fine, fishy fellow I chose up, be sure not to mention me for my name. But this like the gangplank thing? Gangplank list. She loves, she looks. Do you want to die?
Starting point is 00:16:54 And all you need to do is say this points to his people in the Godian Sea. And once he sees it, he'll know that that's the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. So how have God? Let's put on our thinking caps. Hmm. Thinks too hard. I've got it! Never look a tulip in the eye.
Starting point is 00:17:22 I never met a tulip in the eye. I never met a tulip. I trust it, so that is wise advice. So this next fellow will take us. He will guide you, but don't give him the compass until you've arrived at the island. And now is he going to give us directions there if he's not using the compass?
Starting point is 00:17:39 And how do we know who we're looking for? What does he look like? The compass. How many fingers does he have on his left hand? Can he dance starting from the right? He does have a mighty fine dance, I admit. Does he prefer trousers or pants? Does he though?
Starting point is 00:17:54 He don't wear clothes. I've never trusted. It's very undignified. I agree. The point is, he's a tricksy fellow. Do not give him the compass until after you get to the island.
Starting point is 00:18:06 Because if you give it to him beforehand, he may not follow through. Tell him the compass leads to his people. He can go home finally. After all these years, it's all he wants. So he will not die like all of these fine gentlemen. Nah.
Starting point is 00:18:25 the spirit of the sea boy. You really actually be able to go home? Why do you be able to wander via the barricade? His people lie at the end of that needle, girl. If he follows the true, he'll know where to go. Well, without any further ado, I think he's probably arriving soon, and he reaches into his coat
Starting point is 00:18:52 and pulls out this strange, large bloated fish. that seems to be pulsing with the similar turquoise energy and magic as he waves it to all of you and says, keep your eye on this. Don't take it off. And he chucks it into the water about 20 feet out. And with a loud splash, as it splashes in the water, it kind of swirls and spins around. And you hear splash behind you, you turn and you see that the river king is gone. No offense, Draven, but I don't trust you much to keep your mouth shut. What? Can I take the compass? I don't want the compass, have it. Compass, compass, compass. And you're worried about me.
Starting point is 00:19:41 He can know about the compass. We just don't give it. We also don't mention the River King. Who's the River King? We don't mention the other thing. No, but really. What other thing? How much you love.
Starting point is 00:19:56 Purple. I do. I'm not talking about purple. As... I'm not talking about purple. I'm just saying Nami's theme is the best thing ever. The fish swims around, and you see the fins of all of the other predators
Starting point is 00:20:09 start to dart away, and suddenly the water chops, and you see a dark-shaped lunge as a massive shark, far larger than any of the ones that you've seen previously in the water, snaps up, and you see a small creature
Starting point is 00:20:25 hanging on to, to its dorsal fin. Seems to be about the size of Timo and Lulu, holding a sea-stone trident three points as it crashes down. And you hear him call up, Whoa, good job, Chopper. Oh my God, it's Varus.
Starting point is 00:20:47 Hi, does it always have to be Nortles? Hi. You want me to kill him? Oh. Okay. How do you find one is? Shumper's fish. That's pretty great. Hi.
Starting point is 00:21:00 There was the... Hi. Please to meet you, Lulu, and Picks. Every time you want to talk, just make out with me. Wow. I want to talk. I want to talk. I'm talking to you. The shark swims up to your ship.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Is this nice sharp? Well, he's nice to me unless I don't like you. Then he's very mean. Isn't it right, Chomper? How are you able to be? to tame him such a wild beast of the water. I can tame all creatures of the sea if I want to. Ah, you're humans.
Starting point is 00:21:35 They're not so bad, as long as you respect the sea. But we like to have some fun, so I fed a lot of people to him, so don't make me mad. And don't be green. Are you water in your dog? How did you know that? I don't. You are small. But you are blue. I'm purple.
Starting point is 00:22:02 You have no clothes, so I don't. You are big, and I am pretty. And he is dumb. And you have dirt. You are all magic, and magic works in strange ways. You're dirtles. What are you all doing out here? They're turtles made of dirt.
Starting point is 00:22:17 You've got turtles. We need what we need passage. Yes, little one. He has turtles. Yeah. Are you guys? okay. I have never been more confused in my whole life. I have a proposition for you, small one. Yeah. Not you. You have a small one. The new small one. My name is Fizz. Thank you very much. And don't worry. It gets a lot more confusing, but you just kind of roll with it. Like the C's. Fantastic.
Starting point is 00:22:54 Like one big dance. What? Fiz. Yeah? Fizz. What? I like the way that sounds on my tongue. Fizz.
Starting point is 00:23:03 Fizz. No, I don't got nothing. Fizz. So are you guys like greedy, greedy monster hunters or fishermen? Should I kill you guys right now? No, we found something interesting. It's a crumpus. What's your needs?
Starting point is 00:23:22 Doesn't matter. Fis. Can I have that, please? What is it to? Fis. Someone told me that a small yordel-like creature wearing no clothes riding a shark was desperate to find his people and this would get him there. Yeah, it was, um... Are you okay, you just puke over the side and it'll make it better. Just purge.
Starting point is 00:23:48 Two fingers. It's not used to be in this close to the one now. Just two fingers, it'll be fine. What? You're telling you just purge. No, I know. Sometimes you only need one figure. Don't be bashful, don't be shy.
Starting point is 00:24:02 Hang over the rail and let her fly. Yes, exactly. That's what I'm saying. It's going to be hilarious. It's not going to work. Anyway, can I have it, please? We need to find something. And if you help us find it since you're a master of the ocean,
Starting point is 00:24:19 I'll trade you for that. What is it? What do you want? Fish? I can get a lot of that. We have the lots of fish. I need to get to the surface. Oh, that's pretty tough to get there. Only me and one other person get there that I know.
Starting point is 00:24:36 That's why I'm asking you. She's big and really pretty. It's got a big old staff. Probably not that's pretty. Is it bigger than my staff? Yeah, oh, it's a lot bigger. That's rude. All that matters if you is, is that you can get us there, correct? And that's you got you yet. Upon arrival, we'll make the trade. Now you go home. And have this and use it. Absolutely. Can I look at it? I won't touch it. You can look at it from where you're at.
Starting point is 00:25:07 No funny business now. Group persuasion check, please. Oh, shit. Damn. Draven got a one. Draven. Probably bored because my persuasion might be a little higher. 24.
Starting point is 00:25:23 25? Natural fucking six. You got to give it up. Draven is a master of liar and got a nine. Yes. Nine plus six to persuasion. Wow, that's pretty good. Draven is persuasive.
Starting point is 00:25:35 I got three. What did you get? 20. Not 20. Seven. Do you need the numbers again? No, I got it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:44 He looks at all of you and says, Well, I guess I can guide you there, but you have to listen to everything that I say. And if you follow behind me, you're gonna come to the shores of that island, safe and sound, no problems at all, I promise. So we just have to listen. Yes.
Starting point is 00:26:05 My perception. Make an insight check, please. Who? I see it. 13. 13. He seems to be honest. It sounds like we have a deal.
Starting point is 00:26:20 How long is it going to take us together? It's probably going to take like a couple hours. How treacherous is this journey? You'll be fine. I'll take care of you. Nothing battle has. I would like to insight check the fish. Uh, make one, you can make an inside check.
Starting point is 00:26:40 You can just try to discern. To be honest, very honest. Very honest. Well, I don't think we need to rest beforehand. I think we can get going. The sooner the better. How do we follow if we have the boat? Art no sharks.
Starting point is 00:26:56 What are you guys feeling? Love, do you need to rest? Well, I feel kind of squishy. If you're asking me in the way of a sea-ferring creature, I'd like something sporty like a tuna. Say no more! Can I have! Suddenly a massive, like strange rainbow-colored tuna
Starting point is 00:27:16 erupts out of the water, not quite as big as the shark, but pretty darn close. I'm gonna immediately jump on it, like to ride it and say, ha ha, if only Darius can see me now. Could I have a sea horse, please? Oh, that's so great. Oh, you want a seahorse? Yep.
Starting point is 00:27:35 Did you hear that? Yeah, okay. Immediately jump on it. Broo, room! And yeah, it is a beautiful, almost looks like a hole. And Nettles like a sea dragon as it erupts. And it's a bit, it's not nearly as big as the tuna, as it sticks his head out and it looks around.
Starting point is 00:27:51 Boom, boom. I would like something I could lounge on, stretch out my muscles. So maybe a manta ray. Oh, it's a good one. Like a devil ray. Done. And his hands glowed with that turquoise.
Starting point is 00:28:11 And you see a loud splash of water as a huge jet black manterey leaps out of the water. Eyes are red as it lands and slides up its long tail, almost twice along of its full body. Oh, but come on, Betty. So cute. I think. It's a shadow off, and I'll start, like, kind of gently tiptoeing on top of... Yeah, it seems to let you on. They all seem to do exactly what Fizz tells them to do.
Starting point is 00:28:39 Okay. Okay, who's next? Unless you guys want to double up, there's plenty of surface... It's a pizza. Fishing surface fish for everyone. We are going to be on the same here. Why don't you come share my mom to the way up to you? You get to pick what it is, don't make it to...
Starting point is 00:28:51 I don't hear it. I'm going to pass up. What do you have in the way of a jellyfish? Jellyfish? Anything voices? Very, well, very venomous. Yeah. Edvoys.
Starting point is 00:29:01 Pineapple. If you stand on the top of it, it'll be fine, though. It's not gonna be very fast, but you'll keep up. I'll do the jellyfish. He raises his hand, and we'll splash, you just see a bloop. And a relatively small jellyfish appears its head is this a green and purple, almost like your mushroom,
Starting point is 00:29:22 and is spotted as well, and you're able to hop on. It fits you comfortably. Brom would not be able to fit on this jellyfish. Is everyone else picked? Did you have it? And you haven't. What do you have in the way of bird-like things? That doesn't exist.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Bird-like things? I don't know. You're just hurt to ask. You know, feathers? I mean, turtles have beaks. Sounds good. I can't summon any, like, giant pelicans or something. If that's what you're looking for, only sea creatures,
Starting point is 00:29:55 no sky creatures. That is strictly not my domain. I got to stay. I'm a trickster, but I'm a trickster, Stay in my guys. Sound good to me. And with a, he said, okay, good! He jumps and a large sea turtle,
Starting point is 00:30:08 this beautiful blue shell and skin, it merges near you all and you're able to both get on it and you've both been there. I very reluctantly go on this creature. I will take the most majestic, thank you. Wonderful sea creature
Starting point is 00:30:25 with the finest moustache, the walrus. It's actually pretty fucking clever. Well, that's honestly not what I normally work with, but okay, hold on. What did you think? And with a swirling of, it's actually brilliant. Splash of water and the turquoise magic, you hear as a gristle, a giant walrus with a mustache of the full mustache. That's all like the version of yours, but just massive.
Starting point is 00:30:55 Ooh, the mustache on this one. And shagged tusks. swims up to you and it seems that. That's the thing. It's earth the manatee, Mike. Oh, Earth the Manatee. Yeah. It's a Walrus.
Starting point is 00:31:07 It's a Walrus. And it's using all this icy, you see that skin is kind of icy white and blue. It's very, it's almost like it's from Frelio. All immediately leap on. Okay, you guys ready? Good ones. This is gonna be totally fine.
Starting point is 00:31:23 What are we gonna get in again? I'm telling the truth. They're gonna be. They're gonna follow me anyway, so you don't really have a choice. Okay, let's go! And he sticks out his tritum as Chomper the shark thunders forward and swims around.
Starting point is 00:31:41 Every, I'm only, all I am doing is watching this stupid fish child to make sure that it is not sneaking something, hiding something, trying to spin around behind us to get to the bag that hold compasses. Okay, make a general perception check at advantage because you've taken your, You're being very deliberate about it.
Starting point is 00:32:00 That could be for the group here. Uh, did you? I have to pull it. This pizza's pretty good. Um, 17 plus seven. So math. Okay. 23.
Starting point is 00:32:16 24. And, um, so you keep an eye on Fizz as you're this, this fleet of streamed large magical sea beasts. All, uh, form, make a formation where you're able to stay on the top of the the water and you ride in style. As you make your way through the rest of these straits, the Harpies Banquet with no effort at all, as you follow on the other side and veer off
Starting point is 00:32:49 and you almost kind of follow along the line of these straits as you turn left and right. And even though you make your way to open ocean and you see bits and pieces of reef sticking out, it's almost as it's almost as, the light reflecting off the ocean is almost blinding you in certain ways that you can look. And Finn seems to be guiding you around and through.
Starting point is 00:33:12 As you see his try to glow turquoise with every single turn as you travel for several hours and enjoy a short rest. Hey. Wait, wait, hold on. Well, excuse me, while we're doing that, I would like to perform an interpretive dance for my song on rest. So that everyone, we should.
Starting point is 00:33:32 decides to use hit points for their rest. It's an additional D6. Jesus. Thank you. Thank God. And is the only seeing a Gerox sauce? Girlks? Probably I think I have an extra one.
Starting point is 00:33:43 Maybe we've got an extra. Probably got a bag, Jim. Get the fuck back up there! In the D6, you only use once, right? Yes, it is one D6. So you can roll your... He also has five... ...you know you push.
Starting point is 00:34:02 Okay, so... You continue onward and Zaya you notice as Fizz continues to guide you all as Fis to guide you on your respective sea creatures you you see that he seems to be keeping his eye on the horizon he keeps looking up and around and you see as he seems to be staying ahead but you see that there's a bit of a cloud that he's heading in the direction of and you see that it's not quite a cloud at all. It is a, what seems to be like a large flock of these strange white and blue pelicans
Starting point is 00:34:49 far off. It seems to be diving into the water, and he seems to be heading directly towards them. I'm going to whisper over to Rakan who's sharing a fish with me and said... Turtle? Sorry. I don't trust the fish. I don't trust anyone who's not misdive. Just make sure I don't fall up. And I'm gonna take one of my hands off of the thing that I'm holding. And just keep it in my bag at all times, holding the compass. We're gone, put this arm here.
Starting point is 00:35:21 Or underwomen. So that if anything tries to get to this bag, I'm holding onto the compass. That is- Okay. So as you continue to make your way, you all hear the loud squawking of these pelicans. And these are huge creatures. You get the sense that it could swallow a yordle
Starting point is 00:35:40 in one of them. and as they're flying all around, you hear, you see Phyz look back, and he goes he-he-he-he-he-he-he as he shoots through. And now for the same reason why you understand why the white wharf is called the white wharf, you see that these massive creatures also produce a lot of waste.
Starting point is 00:36:00 As, I need everyone to make a dexterity saving throw. Dex, you say? Do I see it coming? No one's, is anyone with intent fee to me? Probably not. No. Oh no, I'm not proficient in X. I would just like to announce that whoever cut my pizza
Starting point is 00:36:14 used to work at Chuckie Cheese. Is that a good thing or bad thing? Squares. No, it's just all over the fucking. I got a 16. I got a 23. Okay. He said deck saving throw.
Starting point is 00:36:26 Decks. 24. Okay. 22. 26. Okay. Oh, no. 30.
Starting point is 00:36:34 Oh no. Rekana. No. 13. So as you're old making your way, you old man, to see as this waist is just dropping from the sky. As-
Starting point is 00:36:46 Are you allowing things to shit on us? Yes. Yeah, but not great. If you're in shit on. And shit on, I am. And Zaya, you only see a flash of white. And Timo, you don't even see it coming, as both of you get completely drenched.
Starting point is 00:37:03 And you literally just shit on. Me and him. Oh, come on, Paula. Yeah. Zaya, well, you see a flash of white as you see your lover. completely turn white, and your speed is now halved. It's not a flash of brown.
Starting point is 00:37:17 It's not a flash of brown. As you literally get shit on. As Portimo gets shit on, I look over my show and say, ha, ha, man, I'm good. And Fizz looks back. He says, ha, ha, ha, ha, oh my gosh. I bet you didn't guys, you didn't see that coming? Oh, I only got two of you?
Starting point is 00:37:37 That's less fun. It hurts you, I promise. It wouldn't be too terrible. Okay, let's go. And then we'll have the next time with your silly jokes and pranks. You're gonna kill it yet? No. And with that, it's only about 30 more minutes
Starting point is 00:37:52 as you continue and you turn one into another one kind of this flash of blue light almost envelopes you. And not brown, but turquoise, as a flash of blue almost envelopes you and the trident washes over you. And suddenly, where there had just been horizon is now an island, a beautiful tropical island,
Starting point is 00:38:19 lush jungles rising up, and pristine beaches, stretching as far as you can see, as Fizz guides you along with all of your sea creatures, up to the beach. And with that, he hops off and says, okay, Chompere, wait right here, I'll be right back. And he hops onto the, the beach and he said, and he waits for you all to dismount.
Starting point is 00:38:43 I will do so. Okay. And I pat my sporty tuna and I wave him goodbye. He looks at you with a large eye and kind of, is my, is our movements beats still have? Yes. We got shit on. Yep. We take some time to actually wash that up.
Starting point is 00:38:58 Can I press vegetation them? Oh, I would say, yeah, you could easily do that. So you are no longer, you need no longer have once you all do that. I will miss you, Gustav. Come see me and fell you. John is very thankful to no longer be covered in shit. Important question. Are you watched the spot off?
Starting point is 00:39:21 No. I'm afraid to go anywhere near it. He still has turtles. So you all manage to dismount and all of your fish and mammals and reptiles and all that biz and invertebrates of whatever, fucking jellyfish is.
Starting point is 00:39:40 I appear I lost an eyebrow. You feel well. Find it on your hand. Oh no. And you all are standing on the beach. It's still on your fish. As you see that this island isn't very large compared to the other islands of the archipelago. And you see that...
Starting point is 00:39:59 No, I've got a question, Mike. How far away from where I did primeval rye? I would say that you are probably... Probably. With several hour journey? Several hour journey. That's probably, that's probably out of that, out of the primordial awareness. Well, unless you're only going six miles an hour.
Starting point is 00:40:17 I'm going to sit down. Do the same thing. Okay. I would say you channel your power of the coast, and you get the strong sense of celestial. And fay. There is no more aberration anywhere near you. Okay. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:40:37 And... Annie, are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay, Andy? Annie, are you okay? Only just barely. This is, uh, walks up to you. He says, I'm sorry that I did that,
Starting point is 00:40:52 but that's like one of like five things that I could have done to you. So, I mean, that's pretty good. I normally would have like, I sent people to their death plenty of times. It was good fun. But you wouldn't have done that because then you wouldn't have been able to go home.
Starting point is 00:41:07 Right? No, I wouldn't do that. No, of course. Of course, can I have the compass, please? Is this the serpent's heart? It is the serpent's heart. Look, it's heart shaped. How can we know for sure?
Starting point is 00:41:17 Can I either assist her or also roll an insight? I would say, we'll do one inside. Now, go ahead. In all trades such as these, we need some sign of good faith. I mean, digitally appear in front of you. I don't, I honestly don't know how to answer that. Dirty 20.
Starting point is 00:41:37 Dirty 20. I would say that you knew that you, you got a sense of being, sorry, dirty 22. I would say that you have the sense that he would be cheeky about nothing bad happening. Here he seems to be incredibly honest. And there's a bit of like desperation
Starting point is 00:41:49 and lonely melancholy. So I believe him that this is a serpentagic. Okay. You guys can see that there's a temple in there. It's not too far through the jungle. I can wait here. I don't want to be too far from the sea. I want to pull Zaya aside for a second
Starting point is 00:42:08 since I know she has the compass. And just, uh, Hey, hey, hey, hey. Not that kind of thing. Is that supposed to be a challenge? You can watch. I can't wait to watch the Damassian woman slaughter the bird man. If you kill him, you die.
Starting point is 00:42:28 Damassian woman. I'm sorry, someone's the younger brother of the leader of Noxas. They shouldn't be throwing their weight around. Ah, no, Darius doesn't give a shit where I am. Great. So that means you won't care when you're dead. He probably wouldn't, actually. Don't worry. I'm not going to kill you. She broke.
Starting point is 00:42:47 If you take your toes and you stretch them really long, you could tie him in a knot. He's okay, Thraven. Friends are your orders, family you can choose. Thank you for pronouncing my name correctly. Oh, you're very welcome, Threve. Why did you want to say? But to say that we don't need the compass for some other reason. I couldn't back.
Starting point is 00:43:08 But if you get lost at sea. I will take you a little bit more than that. You see as soon as you have this conversation up to the side, and Brod, as soon as you mentioned, friends are the family you can choose, Fizz kind of looks a little dejected, and he says, yeah, that would be nice. But the toes and tying I once tied eels around a fisherman's feet,
Starting point is 00:43:35 and he tripped and fell into the water, and the reef sharks ate him. It was hilarious. Is everyone all right? someone alright with this thing leaving us with this? Yeah, that's what we promised. You did, promise me. Alulu always keeps your promises.
Starting point is 00:43:56 We are here. What was that thing again? Scouts go. Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. You done your bargain?
Starting point is 00:44:05 He leaps up and he looks at it. I haven't how like going. So he's just hanged down. He's hanging. Can I have it, please? Can I have him, please? Who has the staff? Her name is Jana.
Starting point is 00:44:24 Oh, fuck me. She's not going to be here, though. Out of character, out of character. But she can come here? Well, everyone besides the... I shouldn't say. Say it. What's the river king?
Starting point is 00:44:43 Say it with your chest. No, it's... He's bad news. He can't come here. No. French prize. The chosen of Noglis. Gangway, Captain Forge. But I'm not to go.
Starting point is 00:45:00 Two words. Two words starts with T. Let's stop guessing. Now. Why? Because it's not a fun game. Oh, I like it a lot. And he sees.
Starting point is 00:45:11 Don't you, Pix? Picks likes it too. The... The compass rose with a glowing needle on the designs. You have dirt. I will kill, DIR. Yes, we wrote here on a turtle, I know.
Starting point is 00:45:32 You were saying, Fizz, Fizz, Fizz, Fizz. He looks at it. Fizz. And he says, I can go home now. I can follow this. Thank you all so much. I was getting so tired of these islands and these horrible, greedy people.
Starting point is 00:45:56 It wasn't fun anymore, but now you get to go home and be with family and friends. Monsieur Fizz, you cannot trust the importance of keeping your family stronger together. I hope you're able to reunite with them quickly. Me too. Good luck. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:46:13 And remember, friends. Thank you all. The darker the night, the right are the stars. He said it. He said the thing. He said the thing. That's so inspirational. Let's go, Chalper.
Starting point is 00:46:23 when we feel inspired. He jumps up. Goodbye! And with a loud splash, chomper dives beneath the surface, and the water is still, and Fizz has left you.
Starting point is 00:46:39 How many more spells can you do today? And you stare up and you see the drama. I don't trust the small one in the hat to not give us away, so we might have to make her forget certain things. Not now, but later. Okay.
Starting point is 00:46:58 And as you stare up above the jungle line, you actually see the very peak, the top of some kind of structure made of stone. Within this dense vegetation. It's always back to the jungles. You know jungles? I should not know jungles. You should lead. I think you know us having the flashbacks. Dumb?
Starting point is 00:47:30 As in, like, what you do to cheese? Exactly. Hey, Zaya, I could suck on my own toe, want to see? I'm, trust you. I'll show you anyway. And I'll start sucking on my toe. Telling her you don't want to see it, only makes her want to do it more. Kind of like telling me I don't want to kill you, Mixer one.
Starting point is 00:47:51 This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com. and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas, shroud over saltmarsh. You can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tone for Dungeons and Dragons 5th edition. And don't forget to snag all the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:48:34 Everybody file in line. Rihanna announces loudly, I have a plan. What's the plan? I will go on instinct. That's not a plan. Well, it works out for a support. No. You stare at the jungle.
Starting point is 00:48:48 What are you all doing? Following Timo. Okay. So you'll be quiet. You all get in single file and I need to do a group stealth check. As you approach, Raconna doesn't make your way. I'm casting pass without a trace first.
Starting point is 00:49:02 Oh. The shadow from your cloak burst out and shrouds all of your friends. I got 33 then. 33. Was it at 10? Yes. 16.
Starting point is 00:49:16 16? Yeah, I got a 33. 20. 20. Okay. 19. Okay, 23. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:25 30. Okay. Got it. So you all follow Timo creeping through the jungle. Timo, this is, as you're make your way underneath vines and over, fallen lobs and through fronds and ferns, this is giving you flashbacks and memories.
Starting point is 00:49:42 Every single fallen friend, every single person you killed, it's all coming back to you. The tunnel warfare. I'm here. A scout standing. The tiger fits. And eventually you make your way down
Starting point is 00:49:58 into a small ravine and you climb up on the other side And then you see in a small clearing through the jungle, the vines hanging down, a large temple, almost ruined, made out of these heavy, almost beige-like stones. And you see that there is a large statue on the top. It seems to be the head of a serpent, but where its chin is are four rising tentacles, and it has five eyes with massive rubies,
Starting point is 00:50:33 marking them, at the very top of this temple. You see a large, what would have been a door, crumbled away through the stone, and you see the darkness within. Does this see this dying at all? I would say make a history check. Natural time. Oh.
Starting point is 00:50:59 Wow, we got to give it out. Natural fucking crime. Got to give it up. I would say with 21, you know that this is not Vestayan. And I think that probably, maybe while you were researching songs, you heard a song about the god Nagakaboros, the mother serpent, the bearded lady, the great kraken.
Starting point is 00:51:18 And this seems to be the architecture and the style and the statue of a temple dedicated to her. It is the god that is worshipped by the Baru natives of these serpent aisles, which have known by a lot of the outside side world is the blue flame miles. Oh, this is the maga. You remember the, the, hmm,
Starting point is 00:51:44 that seemed to only be half helpful. You're only half helpful. That's what a lot of people say. That they're right. I want to step forward just a little bit while still kind of being in the brush and not breaking self. I would like to use my Valoran sets
Starting point is 00:52:03 to determine. any locations of celestial fiend undead within 60 feet they're not behind the whole cover. You channel that and you just said no, any of those within 60 feet of you. We're okay, I'd like this. Fiona, you know, wait, that squirrel looked familiar. She said the thing!
Starting point is 00:52:23 You see a large squirrel I'm trying to get through my entire shape. I will accomplish it. And it seems to be a jungle squirrel. You know, wasn't the one I thought it was. We're okay. I turned a team out. I kneel down and he was staring at me so
Starting point is 00:52:42 I'm going to put both hands on his shoulders and this is Timo. Yes. Okay. Well, let... I don't know that word. My friend. Okay.
Starting point is 00:52:55 I always ask my teammates to ban you and ban on my face. And they never listen. And the opponent locks in Timo and I... And I just rage for it in the first of minutes. That's so sweet. I wanted to confess this to you to let you know I can't stand fighting against you. We'll never fight you, my love. I don't know, but we should.
Starting point is 00:53:16 Okay. I just wanted to let you know. Yes. That is jungle, these woods. I know that's not sure. You're playing tricks in your mind. This is a dark time for me. But just as sharp as your blades, your mind is awesome.
Starting point is 00:53:32 Sharp blades, sharp mind. She said the thing! That was an incredibly roundabout way to get through the floor. Can I run in and I just give them the biggest hug. I do the grip hug. You all group hug. I have to inspire her, but I have no ability to do. Oh my gosh, thank you.
Starting point is 00:53:54 Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thanks, buddy. Thank you so much. Happy to see you in chat. So kind of you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:54:04 We're kind of slowly just starts walking. Slowly just starts walking in the direction of the temple. Okay. You see Rekon just creeping up and you see this large temple looming up ahead. The entranceway now getting closer and closer. As you can see in, it's dark. There are rays of sunlight coming in through the roof
Starting point is 00:54:23 where it had collapsed, but you see that there are a great number of stairs to get up to you before you get to this door. He's kind of doing the Star-word thing where he's just kind of jamming and kind of dancing to himself. like ahead of everybody and just kind of humming to himself and stuff. Okay.
Starting point is 00:54:40 Well, are we going to follow him? I suppose he's dancing. My love, come back. I certainly come back. I recommend skipping. And then I skip. She said the thing. I'm going to get through this list.
Starting point is 00:54:55 I don't have so many lines. I have like, carefully going through them like rations. I still have too many. Make your way up to the stairs with Rakan in the lead. dancing and you see as now that now that you're you make your way up the stair you have to watch where some uh the stove had given way and slides down or bits of rubble have fallen off the roof and destroyed whole parts of this temple but you make your way and you see in this archway
Starting point is 00:55:23 that there seems to be a massive chamber with a stone door at the far end of this room and at the very center of this chamber with uh dome at the top with elegant, not tapestry, a mosaic of symbols of the sea and the sky swirling around not just the roof, but also the walls, a massive, brilliant, a brassy golden statue of the same that you had seen on the roof.
Starting point is 00:55:55 This serpent's head with five eyes and four tentacles at the center. What are we looking for again? We need to pour up. that I still have in my pens. What do we need to pour it on? Into the mouth. Is it like a, a,
Starting point is 00:56:16 the heart, there was a pool, and there's a heart, and there's a heart. There's a seem to be a pool here. Small one, the helmet. Oh, that's me. You're good at traps. Wanna see anybody ahead of us? Can you please stop in two seconds?
Starting point is 00:56:32 Yeah. That's a good idea. I'll scout ahead. Make a survival. Biggest survival. Thank you. Small. 26.
Starting point is 00:56:41 26. You look around and there seems to be no recent tracks at all, but you actually are able to find one or two tracks footprints. I think she said traps. There are no traps at all that you can find. I thought you said tracks. It does it not seem to be trapped at all, at least by anything mechanical. DRAC, KS.
Starting point is 00:57:05 That's what he said. No, I'm too much right. She said there was no trap, so I thought I'd go in my first one. Got it. Tracks, you see the occasional footprint from a large foot, probably the size of Brahms foot, but it seems to be very old. Seems clean. Is this, maybe we try drop. And if it works, then we should know.
Starting point is 00:57:30 I don't think we're in the right spot. I don't think we're in the right spot. I don't think we're in the right spot. So what are we out of here? Are there different paths? I don't think we're in the right spot. I think we're in the right spot. You see as you enter this chamber
Starting point is 00:57:40 that the far door further into this temple has an elegantly mosaic symbol of what looks like to be the shape of a heart with both storm clouds and waves swirling together into that symbol. Tentacles wriggling all around. There's no other pool. This is one small pool.
Starting point is 00:58:04 You don't see a pool. There's just a head of a statue center of this room and you look and you see there are four platforms as you enter and we'll just say you're right at the threshold of this room here that there's a statue in the center and then there's four statues stone statues as you enter that you can see raise on these platforms of what look like tentacles large versions of the one on the end. Hmm. Looks like we need to get in there. Yes, three. Perhaps we split up. That sounds like a terrible idea.
Starting point is 00:58:39 That sounds like a terrible idea. Is there, it's just door? Then open it. Even the heaviest door can be open. I was waiting for it. I said the thing. I was waiting for it. I was to check my notebook.
Starting point is 00:58:58 I'm like, I'm like, come on, buddy, it's in there. I put my shield down next to it. See? Door. Door. Door. A door? And I'm just trying to tell I punch it. Okay. So you take your fist and you punch the door and your hand is,
Starting point is 00:59:19 smashes into it. Even with your strength, it doesn't give way. And you're actually going to take one point of bludgeoning damage. And it bruises your knuckles, but then as soon as you pull your hand back and look, the door, the door and the symbol around starts to glow green. As it bursts with energy and pulses, as it starts to swirl around
Starting point is 00:59:45 and all this intricate carving and mosaics starts a pulse with green energy, as the statue itself glows. And you see all of the tentacle statues do the same as well. As you then see that energies are to pool and form these ethereal wriggling spectral tentacles emerge from the ground,
Starting point is 01:00:05 and they lash about, and they seem to be attacking you. Oh, and roll for an initiative. All of us were just wrong. Good or bad. Good or be back. Surround you. Can you please place up.
Starting point is 01:00:15 Get rid of the last and place your minis where you would have been. Oh, boy. Finally a bad initiative for a great. Oh, oh. Would you guess? Yeah, I got same thing. Yeah. Your initiatives been pretty hot.
Starting point is 01:00:26 It has been. Can I use a baby thing? Go for it. Yeah. Do it. Yeah. They were all the one. We got to move all that. Do it.
Starting point is 01:00:36 Do it. Hop two. If you get another one, I'll end. A. Dreyfing goes when Treven wants to. 20 to 25. Not this time. A 22.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Okay. For Con, 22. 15 to 20. 15. 15. 10 to 15. 13. 13 for Fiora.
Starting point is 01:01:00 Okay. What did you guys get? Draven got a nine. A six. Loooooo. a nine and we led Raven Goofburg. Timo got a seven. May our muscles ripples last an initiative.
Starting point is 01:01:15 You got a six? Brom got a six, so it's Draven Lulu, Timo, Brom. Got it. Okay, cool. With that, feel free to put us places. Yeah, so I would be by the door that I punched. Is this, right?
Starting point is 01:01:33 Yep. With that, is this the door? Is this the door? No, we came in the open way. That's the door. So the door that Brum punched is that one. Okay. And with that, these tentacles merge. Mike, you can have the party parrot.
Starting point is 01:01:51 Oh, or party parrot. Can you have placed yourselves where you would have been? Uh. Place you, Mike. Just point you might as long as you want to go. You probably be up here, like looking at shit. Yeah, we all be. Most thing you're wrong.
Starting point is 01:02:02 Yeah. I think you're probably close to Brown to Brown. Trapp a lot. Um, let's get the camera. get the camera over there. You could. Oh, geez. Come from this, is there enough slack here? Hold up.
Starting point is 01:02:23 So it appears so, but we should probably put it behind the iPad. Nah. Okay. How can I, I try to be around the other side. It looks like an Evie. No, it's not. It's full picks. It's a nine tails. It looks like, as I say, it's got way more than it's got nine tails.
Starting point is 01:02:42 As they do, I'll do this. Brom should check the door for any knockers. No way, Lone Guard, that can't be true. Lone is saying that he has watched 21 solid days. Wow. Content. And I don't believe it. As these, as these tentacles start to wriggle and rive,
Starting point is 01:03:19 and rive, you see the eyes glow on the statue as it pulses with this light and you feel as if it is defending itself in this temple. But Colin, you're up. Um, these are individually targetable things? Yes. They're all super tentacles. I am going to cast Bain at the second level on all the four that are by me and the Zaya. That D20 is going forever.
Starting point is 01:03:48 So the, so six, two, four, and eight. I'm gonna cast Bain on. Okay. So they, that is a Christmas saving throw. Okay. Your turn for feathers. Oh, okay, I'm just gonna go down the horn here. Okay, so six, fail.
Starting point is 01:04:09 Okay. It's on my turn. Okay. Fail, okay. Pass 19. Yep, four fail. Okay, so one of them has succeeded. Which is, we'll say six has succeeded.
Starting point is 01:04:23 Has bained. Okay. So the other three are bamed. And as my bonus action, I want to inspire Zaya by saying, I have your back. Okay. With that, Zaya, you're up. Okay. I don't like the one's right next to me. Is the giant weird symbol a thing that I can stand on?
Starting point is 01:04:50 It is a statue. You can try to climb it. Cool. I'm gonna do that. Okay. How tall is it? It's probably about 15 feet tall. Okay, so it's not giant. No, no, it's giant.
Starting point is 01:05:02 It's a large statue, but it's not like giga huge. Okay, make an athletics check. Or you can acrobatics it if you want to try to pop. Look at what I'm better at. Probably acrobatics. Oh, why is closed? Why do you have closed, D&DV? How do you do that?
Starting point is 01:05:18 It does that. It does that. Uh, yeah, I want to do acrobatics. 18. 18? Okay, you managed to hop up on, get on top of this thing. And use about 15 feet of movement to do so. Beautiful. Does you take an opportunity to? Are you taking an opportunity?
Starting point is 01:05:33 Oh, yes, you will. And that one is bained, so I will. Yeah, no, there's no way. It swings and mists slams down, but it does not find purchase on you. Okay. Ha ha! So, Bain, I just doesn't give me advantage of that, right? No, it just affects that. It debuffs them by B4 for saving throws and attack.
Starting point is 01:05:51 Maybe throws an attack. Beautiful, I'm gonna shoot four. Okay. Uh, 17. 17 hits. Okay. I'm gonna take a second shot. Are the corners the pillars that you were gonna know? Yeah, those are big statues.
Starting point is 01:06:04 Um, 19, nine plus 11. Oh, yeah, that is. Oh, this is an 19 L foster Narito. It's the one sealed away in his tongue town. Eight for the first shot. I'm an anime fan. On number one. On top.
Starting point is 01:06:19 You said, that's me what that was. And ten. All right. Okay. As both fellas are gonna slice in and pierce into it, as it takes the full damage, and it seems to kind of waver a little bit as you pierce it, but it seems to be piercing
Starting point is 01:06:35 some kind of fleshy business. Fiora, you're up. I will make an attack number four. Tripia, who are 13. 13 misses. This one. I think you missed her. Missing through, thanks for the follow.
Starting point is 01:06:53 15. 15, that hits. All right. Yeah, I don't get my spells back because I didn't long rest, so I'll just let it's great. It'll be 12 points of damage. Thank you, Missicorum.
Starting point is 01:07:06 12 points of damage, number one? Number four. Okay, and then. Sounds good. I can use a bonus action to engage Grand Challenge. Okay. To park a champion for final points. So I can roll out D4.
Starting point is 01:07:20 And that's just like her bonus action. It's not like a once a day thing. It's just the once a day thing is. The bonus action and then that would determine where the vital point is. Yeah, so you pick something and you roll the, yeah, you roll the D4. But it's not like I'm engaging the full ultimate version of the- No, no, no, no, no, yeah, that's your- I can just do this anytime I hit.
Starting point is 01:07:40 Yeah, as long as you want to spend a bonus action. You won't have more than one active at a time. So once you pop it, you can make another one. Yeah. Oh, okay, cool. Yeah, that'll eat my bonus action for that. Okay. I'll say one, two, three, four.
Starting point is 01:07:53 So the vital point is on this side. So I will move up here. Perfect. I probably should have started with that. That's okay. Yeah, so you're learning. I'm learning. Yeah, no worries.
Starting point is 01:08:02 That's my turn. Okay, you pierce into it and you do a bit of damage, just kind of wavering, and it's starting to be a little more erratic than the others. It is their turn as they are going to lunge forward and slam down, and we're going to get, I need the one that is actually weak as well. going to make a line slam by the Brom, Draven, and Fiora to make a dexterity saving throw for me.
Starting point is 01:08:27 Ha ha. Is it ten. Natural fucking 20. Fuck yeah. Are these two both of you guys? So the total is going to be 27 for me because I'm near Fiora. Yeah. That's us.
Starting point is 01:08:37 Wow. Give me. No fucking way. What is that like? No fucking way. 12th out, 1,200. Wow. Well, I was advantage.
Starting point is 01:08:47 So that's, okay. So it negates it a little bit, but that's still, That's actually insane. That's actually insane. Go ahead, Maya. Do it. Just save you. No, no, give me some skin.
Starting point is 01:08:56 But that's never stopped you before. Look, wook, wook, wook, wook. Oh, look. Oh, fuck. No, I have not to smile. You're so cute. Your joy over natural 20s So you're going to take half of 14 points of
Starting point is 01:09:10 damage of radiant and bludgeoning is it smashes down on the I would like so excited. Oh, we take half of that. I need Timo and LooLU is now. make a saving throw as well. Oh, shit. A natural two.
Starting point is 01:09:25 What's the hell? Dex saving throw? Yep, Dex. So that's a six. Okay, that's a fail. So why is that? What are you two? That's me, yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:34 Okay. Lily, you get plus three in your to saving throw. That's a nine. Half of 14 again, 14 bludgeoning and radian. So half of you pass, the DC is 13. I love Fiona. Was I actually?
Starting point is 01:09:46 Did I take damage even if I was? Oh, yeah. No, you passed me half. I'll think it was seven. It was seven, yeah, seven and seven. Yeah, so if you play seven, 14. Yeah. And then we're going to get,
Starting point is 01:09:58 and there are the other ones that are out of, actually they're going to be able to lash. One is going to lash at Rekon. It's caught. That is going to be a 17. So these are Tendikols. That is my armor class. Okay, it smashes down onto D.Ling.
Starting point is 01:10:16 Chicken Tendicles. Uh, two. 12 points of bludgeoning and radiant damage. And then we are going to get an attack on, oh, that one already you did that. So we're gonna get two, three attacks on Timo. Stop it. I keep my concentration on Bain.
Starting point is 01:10:35 Three attacks on Bain? I hate my concentration. Okay, three attacks on Timo. Did the ones that with Bain attack them? Two horribly miss. The ones that attack with Bain, they have not attacked him. The ones by us without six.
Starting point is 01:10:50 They have not attacked him, correct. One is going to, to, when is gonna hit you, Timo. And you're gonna enjoy, thank you, 12 points of blood and radiation damage. I'm going to use my uncanny-unuch to half-th grade. And then with that, they're going to shoot up
Starting point is 01:11:12 at Zaya, and they're both bane. And they shoot these radiant blasts at you. But it's minus a D4 and what? that may actually hit. And with Bain, that's minus four that misses. And then the next one is going to be, it's also bane. So it's gonna be 18, but minus three is 15.
Starting point is 01:11:37 So they blast out and they just hit the side of the statue with the energy. And that's everybody. Okay, Draven, you're up. Sorry, there we go. I am going to, it's gonna be tough here. I'm gonna take a look at the ones that are bained and start making attacks. I'm going to take three total attacks here.
Starting point is 01:12:03 That's going to be a natural one to miss, unfortunately. The second one is going to be a 26. Okay. And then a 25. 25 hits? That's going to be five. If we go from where I am, one, two, one, two, three, four, five. Oh boy.
Starting point is 01:12:24 It's going to be like in the stature. you. If I'm gonna move 10, like, oh man. You can get around there, it's bigger. It's just a large thing that's this tower. I don't think technically I can get there. That's fine. Two attacks. Okay. On number, I can't see the number,
Starting point is 01:12:40 but one that's closest to Fiora first. A four or four. Okay. 12 points of damage. Roll that first, okay. It's very rough. And then another 10 points of damage. So 22 total.
Starting point is 01:12:53 It completely dissipates. You fling your axe through. and it bursts. All right, it's my turn. Okay. Lou, they're up. Me. I am going to turn around
Starting point is 01:13:06 every now and then I fall apart, and I'm going to cast some glitter lamps at the ones behind my picks. 28 and a... 20. 28 and 20? Okay, both have. 18 points of four stands.
Starting point is 01:13:33 to the one. 18 points of force damage, okay. And it is slowed because both of them hit. To number three? Yeah. Okay. You burst out and they both hit
Starting point is 01:13:45 and they seem to do the full damage. Its speed is reduced by half. Got it. Not like it really matters, but it is. By the way, oh, never mind. We got pressed digitation, we're in a longer down. Yeah. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:58 No, I clean. All right, I am going to. Just not your nerdles. I've got a mushroom with your name. You drop mushroom down and then I'm going to blow dart number five. But I said the thing? She said the thing. I just.
Starting point is 01:14:11 Very nice. Very well done. I've never played Pimo, I don't know, he says. 21. To number one. And that's 10. 10 damage. 10 damage, number one?
Starting point is 01:14:21 To number five. We have a lot of words. You shoot into it and you can see that the poises are just dissipate into it. It seems to be actually doing things. Uh, kind of pulses. Brom you're up. I understood.
Starting point is 01:14:33 This final defense of this temple. You're very good. You're just so cute and kill some now. I want to proceed if I sense any other, like, danger coming from out. Fine lesson? I would say makeup is have to check. Do you like this? Best friend.
Starting point is 01:14:50 Skills. There's been all computers just going to turn. This seems to be. Sorry about that. Can't go, Kanku O.P. Seeing that, I will run, can you move me like, like run me, maybe like seven square. I think I have seven, or actually eight squares.
Starting point is 01:15:09 Damn. Four, five. Up. Yeah, over here. Six, seven. Yep. Yep. And then I'm gonna jump here, and I'm going to use glacial fissure and slam my shield down.
Starting point is 01:15:22 Fuck yeah, let's go, baby. On the ground and I'll say, and there will be a ground will start to break out into ice. Yeah, it ruptures and ice is bursting up everywhere. 10. seven, eight, fine? 10, 11, 12, everybody with that guy. Okay.
Starting point is 01:15:38 Oh, damn, dude. Does it hit us too? No, no, no. It's people. Holy shit, what's the range on that? 60 by 10. Damn. It ruptures.
Starting point is 01:15:48 And they need to make saving throws? They need to make, hold on, let me just read it. Let me need to make a deck saving throw. Okay. And that's three. Let's go around down the horn here. So can you just name the number?
Starting point is 01:16:02 Can you do that one? Five. 13. What's the DC? Oh, this is 16. 13, okay. Five, fails, seven. 10.
Starting point is 01:16:10 Fails. Three, ten. Four, fails. Ten. Eight. Fails. Two. Eleven.
Starting point is 01:16:18 Fails. Okay, they all fail. They all fail. They all failed. So I'll just re-roll one of these. This one. So they will take. Yes.
Starting point is 01:16:28 This. It will be worse. They're going to take. 10 plus 12 is they're gonna take 22 points of damage and they are all restrained. Oh, crap. Wow. Until the head time.
Starting point is 01:16:46 Until the end of my next turn. It's also difficult terrain for enemies. They're chicken tendicles. The ice ruptures and they all start to shift around as they all are unable to dodge being kind of rooted to the ground at least that you can see and they take the full blast. The ice is, your magic is,
Starting point is 01:17:02 strong enough to not harm your allies as it ruptures out as they take that full damage. Hello, Tenticle. I'm here for the panel on the Japanese robot. Okay. Which, were there any that didn't get hit by? Just that guy. Okay.
Starting point is 01:17:18 Yes, I missed your pain. So that guy's. I am going to, oh, what number is that? Six. The best tentacles. I'm gonna do a little interpretive dance as an attempt of vicious mockery, the number six. Okay.
Starting point is 01:17:31 Wisdom's aiming through. Okay. 16. I failed. Got 11. All right. It takes five psychic damage. It has disadvantage on its attack rolls
Starting point is 01:17:46 until the end of his next turn. Yeah, you do that and it seems to kind of shift and shake as it takes the damage. And you dance, and even though it's a tentacle, seems to notice what you're doing. Okay. Oli. Zaya.
Starting point is 01:17:57 Drop it low. No. Let me see, shoot that ass, girl. All right, I'm just gonna shoot the ones that are closer on the side. Okay. Darby did one, that would two. You should sharpshooter. I will if I do a good thing.
Starting point is 01:18:11 You got to say it before you roll. Good thing I didn't do it, huh? It's good thing that's still 15. 15 barely hits. I believe in you, Ziah. That one is definitely 24. Okay, that hits? You're hitting the same one he hit?
Starting point is 01:18:28 Yes. Okay. That's my eight. That's my eight. That's a date. Where's my D-8? What's my D-8? Thank you.
Starting point is 01:18:38 Uh, 10? 10 points of damage, okay? Uh, eight. Eight, okay. Your arrows fly in, and it pierces in, and they glow as they all fall down, okay? And with that, it's fewer turn. Very good.
Starting point is 01:18:57 I will try to, let's see. Of two and eight, can I tell from my distance, which will speaker? I would say being tentacles is kind of hard to tell. Oh my god, this is a really good Pikachu. Do I know anything about some portrait? Oh, oh. Oh, my fault. Probably not.
Starting point is 01:19:15 Okay, I'm currently drawing a Pikachu. And I take an attack against this one. Okay. Two plus three. Uh, 12 misses probably. Yep. Okay. It made this wriggle out of the way. And the other one died that I did the thing on, right?
Starting point is 01:19:30 Yeah, probably. So this was a 21. Okay. So this will do. Okay, so 14. Points of magical piercing to number two. 14? Yep, and then I will roll a D4 to determine it's... You pierce into it and your magic rapier slices through.
Starting point is 01:19:52 So I think I said one, two, three, four. So one, two, so it's on this side. Okay. So I will go, so when I move, five, ten. You're taking an opportunity attack? I'm just gonna go around. Oh, but I was two. That's right. Yeah. That's gonna be 24 to hit.
Starting point is 01:20:10 Woof. No, I don't think that misses. Darius, I threw that for you. Oh my God. Look at how good that is. 23 points of- Mr. Burns from the sentence. It's the man.
Starting point is 01:20:23 It's down on top of you. Fuck, it's Tonjero. I should have known. Okay, that's with your turn. It's turtle. With that, with that, Oh my God, Stina Carvey. It's their turn. As they are going to,
Starting point is 01:20:46 They are all, how many are left? Seven. Seven. As they're all going to channel the energy, the spirit glow, the statue glows, and they all shoot up into the statue. Oh, fuck it. As a massive burst of radiant light shoots out. I need everyone to make a-
Starting point is 01:21:08 Wait, is this their thing? This is their action. Just checking. Is it the statue I'm standing up? Wait, oh, I'm sorry. Is it going to matter? It's monster's one. Is that the tenicle or you said that's a statue? Tenicles turn.
Starting point is 01:21:20 Okay, then these two blow up. Okay. Con saving them? Yes. For one, seven and three. That's going to be an 18. That passes. And a 19.
Starting point is 01:21:31 Thank you, Roger. That passes. They both pass. So they get one stack of beast and they maybe take some damage. You might not matter. If it doesn't matter, then that's fine. No, they take a wisdom. Okay, I didn't know if it will not matter
Starting point is 01:21:42 if they're gonna like sloop into the- So they take five damage or they have one stack. Five damage to whom? Two, seven and three. Okay, three. Three's looking pretty rough as it bursts, but they're still able to shoot into it and a blast of radiant light,
Starting point is 01:22:02 I think everyone to make a wisdom saving. Oh, no. against magic. Yes. Draven isn't very wise. And that's true one. No one gets plus three. Sorry. Draven is quite arguably the dumbest creature in Noxas. Draven got a five. Ha ha! Wisdom, you say? Yep.
Starting point is 01:22:27 Draven is bracing for his mind to be melted. Eleven? Yeah. Okay. 16. 23. 23? 23. Draven's new name is Jellobrain. Good. Where you get Timo? Is that much amazing?
Starting point is 01:22:40 Nine? Okay. What do you get, Kukon? 16. Brom. Oh, I'd map for one. Okay, so you three guests, the two yordals, and then Draven and Brom,
Starting point is 01:22:52 you're doing the full amount of this. Yeah. 26 points of breaking damage. Fucking hell. And as it blasts you, you all feel almost like your soul is being ripped out of your body as you see a green spectral version of yourself appear next to you.
Starting point is 01:23:14 Okay, Alan. For those of us who saved, we take half? Getting half of the damage, no soul, spectral soul business. I'm gonna use heart of the Freliorit or whatever the fuck it is to reduce that damage by 1D12 plus my con. Do these disappear because they merged in with the same?
Starting point is 01:23:30 They emerged and shot energy up. Draven will begin to, they're there. They're there. Okay. And do we have to roll a con? What? Oh, I have to roll. He had a stack on him, right? So he has to roll.
Starting point is 01:23:41 Oh, yeah. 11. Yeah, that's okay. So he takes one B four. Do we need to show that there's a spectral version of ourselves? No, just say it's, we'll just say it's next to us. He takes two damage. Two damage.
Starting point is 01:23:54 Okay. I don't know who failed. And now does that stack clear once a damage him? Is that a thing? That's a thing. Well, he passed the saving throw. Okay, no. He just takes damage to do it.
Starting point is 01:24:03 It's looking rough for that. Okay. With that, you see that the same thing. You see that. these spectral forms appear next to you, almost in your similar, in your same space, but they're floating ethereal. And these forms are all looking up,
Starting point is 01:24:19 their eyes are shooting up with green light as they seem to be judged by this statue of Nagakaboros. With that, it's Draven's turn. Oh boy. Can I interact with this spectral form of myself at all, does it seem like? Or is it not targetable? It seems to be targetable.
Starting point is 01:24:37 You think you can hang out with this point? You should try to shoot, it seems to be they're made of the same kind of stuff as your, as your, uh, Draven. Draven. What in the hell is this? There can only be one Draven. And I begin to attack the spectral form myself. Okay.
Starting point is 01:24:54 You make, oh boy. You attack the spectral form. I'm gonna take three auto attacks. Uh, the first one is going to be a 20 to hit. A 20 to hit. So we'll roll the damage for that first. Yikes. Uh, that's gonna be a total of eight.
Starting point is 01:25:09 Of eight. How much health do you have right now? 19. 19. It does, it does, slices in, and as soon as it hits you, you take four points of psychon damage, as it racks your brain, and you realize that there's a tether between you and this creature. No one attack that one, and I go to attack one of the, one of the spectral... Okay, you do that. One of these guys. That's what Wigglers, they're called.
Starting point is 01:25:39 I'll make two attacks against it. The one actually that's right next to serving. Henry Winklers? They are. They're Henry Winklers. That's going to be a 16 and a 25. He's from Greece. Then I will see if I can catch this bad boy. Eight, re-roll it.
Starting point is 01:25:58 Eight, re-roll it. Seven. What did I say? It was, oh, I only have to move. See, I'm like in the statue again. It doesn't work out very well, but I can technically move. If the statue's like you're like that's like rising up then I'll make one more tag against it that's gonna be a 16 as well okay Nice what numbers that? It's to number well the first a couple that's the number one I'm gonna probably obliterate this 16 yeah numbers I'm looking rough but it's still hanging on no no no I haven't said my damage yet
Starting point is 01:26:32 the the bonus to it alone is is 18 plus I'm like 35 35? 35 is just barely enough to kill it. Perfect. Then he's gone. Okay. Throw your axes catch it and it bursts as the axe is sliced through it. That's my turn.
Starting point is 01:26:50 Okay. Ooh, you're up. I'm gonna hit number three again. Okay. 20 and 21 to hit. Both it? 17. 17.
Starting point is 01:27:06 That kills it. You blast into and explodes into spectral energy. Goodbye, Henry Wiggler. With that, it is Timos turning. I'm gonna look at my spectral form and say, you and I are survivors, buddy. No one could kill us. And then I'm gonna blow dart number seven.
Starting point is 01:27:29 Okay. Draver tries to kill himself. Timor tries to love himself. Let's see what happens with that freaks. Thirteen. 13 misses, it dumbs out of the way. I am going to might get the sense that it will try to
Starting point is 01:27:45 of attack me if I run away, my spectral one. It doesn't seem to be actually moving. It's like, eyes or why. It's like, ah! It seems like, you're fine. He seemed good. I'll run. I'm gonna just run back a little way over here.
Starting point is 01:28:05 And bonus action, check potion. Okay, you do that. You chuck that potion. Brom, you're up. I will look at the brook, mix. say they need our shields let's go not really registered that I'm going to smash in recklessly if I can only use these two twice so that is a I think it's plus seven to hit so that is a 19 and a
Starting point is 01:28:41 18 27 so it's a 27 so it was both that okay perfect And then I will do... To which number is this? This is number five. And then I need just to be in five. 17 points of damage. That's exactly what you needed. As you bash, bash, and it pops.
Starting point is 01:29:08 And then just move me up 40 feet, just to be next to Lulu if I can get there. Yeah, no problem though. You might do that. We'll just leave. Yeah, I'll just do it. Okay. And for coming, you're up.
Starting point is 01:29:19 Okay. Draven, which one are you? I'm not with a fireball on his hand. Okay. Yeah, red base. You see, okay, so Rekon faces this way and looks at the things that are over there. He turns around and looks at Draven's spectral form for just a brief moment. Oh, yeah, no, please don't.
Starting point is 01:29:39 And then he turns around and casts his gleaming quill at, we'll say, this guy? Yeah. Eight eight. Eight. Eight. So because we've taken a short rest to have my gleaming grill back. So there's a range spell attack. Okay. E. E! That's 14 to hit?
Starting point is 01:30:02 14 misses, unfortunately. God damn it. Fuck! All right, well. Fiora, how are you doing? I could use a book. Well, I can't do anything about that. Dan's an inspiring. Draven wants to party with Fiora. Drapen is looking to also get a bump. Delacian's not too far. You still have.
Starting point is 01:30:27 You feel his eyes. The sty and magic heal you. Fior, you're up. Ignore the radio's bloody, no idea. You feel inspired by his dance. With no intention of meta-game at all, do I understand the intention of these tendacles? Not at all.
Starting point is 01:30:42 Excellent. Or would you mean like they're obviously a good, a natural defense system for the time? Like, I haven't seen them move. Nope. They're just, wriggling around blasting and smacking in you. They're physically moved positions. I see it.
Starting point is 01:30:54 Just come from the ground. Yeah, I just want to like big in your face. I will, I'm gonna attack two from the rear. I think it's called pentacles. Try to hit the vital point. How many regular from Greece two is my favorite? That will miss the 12.
Starting point is 01:31:09 Yeah, I missed and dodged that with the way up. That was such a sworn salient. This should be a dirty 20. Three 20. Grease two is actually really good. And then that'll be, 17 points of magical piercing. Number one?
Starting point is 01:31:21 Number two. 17 points. I can watch it. That you smash into it and it is dead. Is it still a musical? Oh yeah. I will. There's a song called reproduction.
Starting point is 01:31:30 Move right here just to get behind this one. I'm not really trying to do much else here. Do much else here. And then I'll use a bonus action to ploff greater killing potion. So there is one there and so it's their turn. They're going to wriggle around and smash down. I need Brahm, Draven, and.
Starting point is 01:31:50 Rakan to make the dexterity saving throw. Dext, you say. That's gonna be. Have you raged, Rich? Yes. I got 22. Draven was too quick. 19. Perfection.
Starting point is 01:32:03 I got that. So this is half of this. This is, I have 13. 13 is not passing it. So 12 points of radium damage, 12 points of radion damage and 12 points of bludgeoning damage. Holy shh. Shit.
Starting point is 01:32:18 So 10 points. Holy fucking hell. dead. Okay. So it's 24 total. And then we're gonna get two attacks on Fiora with the tentacles as they surround her. So I keep their no longer restrained. Both of those are gonna be a 19 and a 24. I will use my reaction to defensive duelist the 19 hit. Okay. That's my AC at 20 for just the hit. So 13 is the one that hits you, smashes into you. Draven, you're up. I'm actually gonna move next to Rakan. So that's like 15 movement, give or take.
Starting point is 01:32:59 And then I'm gonna make, I'm gonna start by making two attacks on number eight. Okay. That's gonna be a miss and one hit. Okay. I might be out of movement actually because I only have 15, three more squares. Oh no, I'm good because then I can go, but, but both and catch the axe for one more attack. So I'll just do the first damage first. On what?
Starting point is 01:33:29 On number eight, it'll be nine points of damage to number eight. Okay, it's still holding on here. Natural 20. Oh, wow, gotta give it up. Gotta give up. Are you hitting this guy? No, no, no, nox. Nox in, so you do an extra.
Starting point is 01:33:41 Yep. Is this a Bissigai? No, no, number eight, the one with the Bain one. So it's gonna be 13 plus six is 19 points of damage. Oh, that's enough. Yeah. Then I'll take my last attack and attack number six. That's gonna be 21 to hit.
Starting point is 01:33:56 Yep. Eight points of damage to number. Number six. Okay, with that, Ruff, Lou, you're up. Do you have rolled four nine and twenty-seven? I'm going to glitter lance at the one in front of bronze. Number seven.
Starting point is 01:34:13 16 and 27. So, that's. 17. 17. 70 points of damage? Yeah. Number what? Seven, seven or six?
Starting point is 01:34:24 I'm sorry, seven. Seven. Okay. Also exactly what you needed. It blasts into it and it completely explodes into glitter and pink. Bye. One remains, and that is who's turning to. Timo, you're up.
Starting point is 01:34:38 So I didn't move. Oh, you blew that one. Yeah, I did. Son of our biscuit. We all blow up with mushrooms. Also, not a quote. Not something that said. She said, hey.
Starting point is 01:34:58 Oh, Steve will note your brain. Awesome, not a quote. I like eggs. Not in a T-rated game. It's looking very weak. What? It looks very weak. So I don't want to blow up driven.
Starting point is 01:35:12 Ha, you could never. I don't think I can do anything. I'm just going to... I'm just one of the shoot it. Oh, I reach. I'm thinking I have 15 feet. You've got to get some of your much room. Blunty, plenty, plenty of butter.
Starting point is 01:35:25 There you go. Oh, yeah. Okay. Why? Why? That's a thing. Yeah, it's 24. That is, double damage?
Starting point is 01:35:40 Oh, it's 10 damage. Exactly how you like to do this. Wow. Um, ooh. Mm. Pupils narrow, your eyes widen. Yeah. I would like you to tell me how, though.
Starting point is 01:35:54 No, I got a... Okay. You're... Um, I would like to crouch down and, like, have my entire eye just, like, go, black for a minute and be like, and just fire a dart off. Yeah, and it flies and it pierces through and as soon as the dark hits, it explodes.
Starting point is 01:36:10 And quiet returns, the energy shrinks back and into the door and then the door opens. We just had to hentai to get inside. What's about our spectral people? Oh, they disappear as well, along with the rest of it. They kind of slewip back into you. and you feel like you're full and you're full again.
Starting point is 01:36:34 I'm gonna slam a few potions. Yeah, you just start chugging the potions. Yeah, that's a lot. 44. 44 plus four. As the doors open, you see a relatively small chamber. I don't got it.
Starting point is 01:36:48 With a sudden, a sun roof where there's sun shining down. Dude, guys, I wrote three-fours and a three. Holy fuck. Nice. It was like two seconds to portion, does that hurt? Not to you. All right, I'm almost out of healing,
Starting point is 01:37:11 but I'm good. A beam of sunlight shines down in this relatively small chamber up ahead. Oh God, Melroseau 3,4-1s. And intricately crafted basin in the shape of a heart, but woven together with beautiful knotwork and forming into this beautiful statue
Starting point is 01:37:33 filled with rubies and plated in gold. And at the center of this basin is what looks like water, but despite there being no wind in this chamber howling in, or coming from the hole in the ceiling above, the water in this basin is lashing about, like waves on the sea, and you see the wind whipping around on top. That was too easy. Muscle Man, do the honors.
Starting point is 01:38:05 Seems to be the heart of God. All right. I'll pull it out of my pants. Who? Put his away, Brahm nuts now. Hubba, hubba. Are we ready? Yep.
Starting point is 01:38:20 I was born ready. I'll bite the cork off. And I will, so I understand that this is like, this is like what we do, right? Yeah. I will just. One drop. Perception check for me, please,
Starting point is 01:38:32 while you walk up to it. Oh, uh-oh, bye. That is a nine plus. I grew a turn-up. It's a 14? A 14. As you step forward, you uncourt the Iran. And what do you say?
Starting point is 01:38:55 I say, This will tell a great thing. And as you are going to do that, a flash of movement, as a massive humanoid form lands into the basin. And you see a massive woman about the size of you, her tan skin covered in tattoo, slamming a massive golden circular idol into the basin
Starting point is 01:39:25 as it bursts with green energy and shoot beams into all of you, and everyone to make a wisdom saving through it is advantage. Oh, geez. Is it a magic? It is. You get plus three. Thank God.
Starting point is 01:39:37 I got a 10. I'm gonna roll. You said wisdom was this is Draven's worst trait. I got a 10. Oh, I got a 24. 19 still. Thank God.
Starting point is 01:39:48 Driven out. 13. 13? I'm going to die. 16? 16? 7. 7, Lewis? 15.
Starting point is 01:39:57 15. All of you fail. Holy fuck. Even me? Even you? D.C. 25. Oh, God. As the beams burst out and they all connect you.
Starting point is 01:40:08 And you are all paralyzed and restrained as your eyes fill with green energy. As the tentacles all are bursting from this heart. And you see this woman in gold, what clothing she has is minimal. Her tattoos are all over her body. And you see her long, dark hair and her green eyes look at all of you and says,
Starting point is 01:40:35 you have come into the temple of Nagakebo. Under the guise of lies, do you not see this? And you feel like you can barely struggle to speak. Here, let me show you what my God can show you and see where the lies of the river King would bring you. As something all of you see, vision, as you see a single drop of rum, enter this. this pool, as dark water taints it immediately, and overflows it as it spills into the sea,
Starting point is 01:41:18 it spreads out across the archipelago of the Blue Flame Isles. As you all see individually then, the corruption of the hearts of men and women and children as they turn to avarice, to hunger, to their base desires, Lulu, you see the end. You're successful. You shake the hand of the River King. He opens his mouth, and you dive in. And in a burst, you are in the glade.
Starting point is 01:41:57 It's beautiful. Everything that you remembered and imagined. And as the River King leaves, there's a single drop of that rum, and it spreads and completely taints and pollutes the beauty and turns it to horrible darkness. Draven, you see yourself. You shake the hand of the River King.
Starting point is 01:42:20 You go on, you go back to Noxas. You get as much wealth and adoration as you can possibly imagine, but then it's not enough. As long as Darius still lives, you will always live in his shadow. Your axes cleave off your brother's head. as you see the what had to be done. Your story is told far and wide.
Starting point is 01:42:52 Yes. Thanks to the power of the river king. Yes. And you spend your time and how else will you become a hero of all of Rune Terra unless you leave the Frelior? Leave it behind and travel the world. You do that. You become a great renowned folk hero. Not just of the Frelior. You're the heart of Rune Terra. But then you return home. Frelior, there was no one to protect it. It lies in waste, devoured by horrible monsters, the poros.
Starting point is 01:43:19 The poros. In the snow, there's blood. Poro corks as far as you can see. Jesus Christ. Like, too far. Taking the rabbits of the world and said, fuck it. You get exactly what you want. You become the most ruthless killer.
Starting point is 01:43:39 The most efficient, deadly killer in all of Rootera. Your poise is the most potent. Your aim with your blowgun the most true. My darts never miss their mark. Your darts never miss their marks. You live in the shadows. And as you kill and you kill and you kill,
Starting point is 01:43:54 you have to practice in order to get better. You almost becomes indiscriminate. And then until one day, you finally feel it. This is the last target. You feel like this is. You blow and you, it hits a yortle. Dead. And you go up to check the body.
Starting point is 01:44:10 and it's your dear friend, your only friend, Tristana. Her eye, her dead eyes stare skyward as you kill the only friend you ever had. Fiora. Fiora, you hear the whispers. The Lurker King tells you exactly what you must do. You shake his hand. No one can spread rumors if they ain't living.
Starting point is 01:44:38 You go back to Damasia and any single whisper. You get the power to hear every single. bad word spoken and finally after years you finally achieve it not a single bad word is spoken of the Laurent family but it's you realize it's your your town is quiet all of the nobility has been killed noxas would like to know your location no one's left in Empire of Ash Zaya You get exactly what you want. The means it's not any time at all.
Starting point is 01:45:16 You go back to Ione. You find Zed. You have his head in front of you. You finally kill them. And you feel like no time had passed, but you look down as on top of Zed's corpse is a massive pile of bodies. Countless, countless, countless humans, some not innocent, some very innocent,
Starting point is 01:45:38 that were in your way, one way or another. Lie slain at your feet. But Khan, you wanted to help Zion protect her. She survives to her goal. But once she achieves her goal, the bodies that have been left behind spawned countless others looking for revenge against her, similar to how she had sought revenge against Zed. It won't be long until, there it is, the blade at her back, your love dead in your arms. As the voice booms out, I respect all of it.
Starting point is 01:46:12 of you for following your desires to get here. You have conquered beasts, you have conquered the sea, to pursue your desires. The universe is brought forward towards its destiny, only from intelligent creatures pursuing their desires. That is the will of Nagakaboros. But there is a better way not through lies, not through the endless hunger, the deceit of a demon, but of a God. You all stand trial now,
Starting point is 01:46:55 the test of Nalkeboros. What is it you desire? And what will you do when you achieve it? And you all feel compelled. And you can finally speak. Lulu. You're up first. So I really would like a person.
Starting point is 01:47:14 pony and um I want new shoes because mine have holes in the bottom I would really like for picks to have a pretty dress that matched mine and a large hat but not larger than mine and I want to go back to the glade and everything to be beautiful there and when I attain all this I'll ride my ooh can it be a unicorn not a pony so it has a horn in its head I'll ride my pony corn in into the glade with picks on my shoulder whose hat is slightly larger than most people's hats but not bigger than mine, and I will just make pretty things covered in glitter.
Starting point is 01:47:49 Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. As you think the word fizz, you glow a bright green, and you hear the voice call out. Yes. You are truly a creature of desire.
Starting point is 01:48:02 Yeah. And you will stop at nothing. And now Naga K. Boros makes it so, Not the River King. Okay. Well, that's cool. You're out. I want money.
Starting point is 01:48:15 Fame, fortune. I need the cheer of the crowd. I have no desire for war. And my brother telling me I have to fight. No, what I truly want is not to be bored, the excitement. From the battle, the sport. Everyone will know Draven's name. and they will
Starting point is 01:48:40 to the power of the mother serpent as you alight green Brom I will go home I don't need to be a hero of anywhere else they call me the heart of Frelioard and that's what I will be
Starting point is 01:48:58 I will defend my home and defend every human every Astayan, every troll And every poorer, as best I can. And they will tell a great tale once it is all said in the...
Starting point is 01:49:16 A great tale it will make. And what you desire will be yours. Thanks to the bearded lady. You fill with energy. Timo. Well, to be able to kill, that doesn't change. I want to be able to kill because I want to, not because I have to, to protect my friends.
Starting point is 01:49:39 I want to stand strong. and never be burdened by the death simmer. Okay, it can be my freedom from PTSD. Please, I need medication of therapy. There's a little bit of hesitation. And a little bit of hesitation, then you hear a voice. Men live and men die. What is important is change.
Starting point is 01:50:03 You will kill, and you will bring about the chains that drives the universe, and you glow with green energy. Fior. Fior, you're out. Damn, wow. I want to redeem my father's sacrifice for House of Laurent. Once and for all, restore our family name and honor.
Starting point is 01:50:28 I fought him on his dying day. I set farewell in every clash of our blades I truly desire. You will redeem your family's name, but not through wanton slaughter. but through your deeds it will be done by the Great Cracken you alight
Starting point is 01:50:52 Zaya, you're up For generations our people's magic has been stolen I want it returned and our numbers to grow once again to the way they once were A noble goal and one you have strived your entire life for
Starting point is 01:51:16 Nagy Kiboros sees it and so do I You glow green But Colin, you're last. I want our people to be protected and my love to be at peace for Anxia and her peace of mind with this her, all that she has sought in the world and that it is no longer as necessarily required
Starting point is 01:51:51 for her to be out in the world. doing all of these things in order to protect our people and that she may just rest, and that we may just spend time together instead of doing all of this out of love. You will wait in here. A peaceful life does not be one that is stagnant. You will have what you seek in your dedication will be rewarded. It is done. And suddenly you were all released.
Starting point is 01:52:26 as you all... Is it too late for Draven to want to be Mr. Fortune? As you all burks with green energy. And you all feel as your body begins to glow. And it snakes all around you and almost as you see the huge woman standing in the basin before you, her tattoos are glowing. Your skin glows in the same patterns as her tattoos
Starting point is 01:52:52 in the wriggling tentacles and patterns before. shrinking back into not her but you you feel a sense of incredible power incredible will as if not only that you can achieve what you desire but you will
Starting point is 01:53:09 you have been blessed by Naila K. Boros after standing trial and you all return to yourselves you feel great I feel so light
Starting point is 01:53:26 I don't know what overcame me. Overcame Brom, the heart of failure. The power of the river king is strong and gets stronger every day, especially in these lands. But you have all been noticed by Nagakaboros and you will achieve your desires. I am Elawi, the priestess, of the mother serpent.
Starting point is 01:54:01 This is the eye of God. You have been blessed, and I now know that there are covetous eyes on this place, dark powers. I thank you for alerting me to that. I need to rebuild this temple. Spend time here. There wouldn't happen to be a Mr. Priestess of the wriggling tentacles.
Starting point is 01:54:31 She steps off, and she says, I would break you, dear man. But she then looks at Rom. You, on the other hand, a man that won't break. Damn it! Some milk, lethal? Oh, my God. Another time. Another time, I must stay here.
Starting point is 01:54:53 I spent too much time with the ungrateful in Bilgewater. You must focus on rebuilding this temple and protecting the heart of God. And I need to go home. You all need to go home. And you will. I will call for you a... A crackin worm.
Starting point is 01:55:18 It is a spiritual beast of Nagaheboros. It will take you back to build water. And you all may go on your way. Can I get fit a name? You may. Cracken dice by Doris Foundry. He will forever be known as the Cracken, named Dice by North Sandry. Being worthy of respect is worthy of many great names.
Starting point is 01:55:41 Thanks. And she steps and guides you out, and as you make your way to the beach, leaving the temple behind, all feeling blessed by Nagakai Boros, you see a massive creature rise out of the tides. It is a five-eyed serpent, sea serpent of some kind, with a beard of sorts of four tentacles wriggling around. As it leans down to allow you all to mount, this is your passage home. It will take you safely. I wish you all the success in achieving your desires, but I do not need to wish it. I know it will come to pass. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:56:31 the creature. Thank you. Paycott, and goodbye. And I'll jump on. It was a pleasure to meet you. Goodbye. Come on, Cracken Dice by Norse Foundry. And just bow and then get out of the Cracketka. Yeah, Ricconda's like a little bit of a flourish of a bow and then follow Zaya onto the back of the future. You all pop on as I choose music. Can we get a counter for how many times Andy's had a hold back his beard? It's been like 10,003.
Starting point is 01:57:08 That's a mustache. I just want to do a super cut of every time Andy's gone and giggled. So, feeling an indescribable sense of passion and drive, it's wild as the sea and the wind. You all mount the colossal crack and worm, which accepts you with no question, as you were all blessed by Nagu K. Boros, you arrive back to the docks of Villagewater. Before we go, the Docks of the Wildwater,
Starting point is 01:57:39 I just shoved Draven off the Cracket. Good luck. As hard as I can. I have saved my ultimate and I use Whirling Death on Zaya. I have used none of my abilities the entire time. Let's go. They want to fight the entire time.
Starting point is 01:57:57 And the strange sense of being connected to the Cracken worm, No matter how many blows they strike to each other, they cannot to kill each other. Tea fight! Tactics. As you arrive back to the docks of bilge water, the awestruck dock workers can do nothing,
Starting point is 01:58:13 but stare in amazement as the creature drops you off and slinks back into the depths. Knowing that by the next day, you'd all be parting ways, you decide to stay in a nearby tavern for the night before heading home in your respective ships in the morning. I was really disappointing. With a name like dice, you'd think it'd be made of dice, but there was no dice in that thing at all.
Starting point is 01:58:35 You gave it that name. I know, for a reason, I wanted some dice. I do have dragon chess if you wanted me to teach you or something. They have ice? Anyway, you spend the evening drinking rum, telling stories, and sharing a single night as kindred spirits, bound by the mother's serpent, despite having been called together by the lines
Starting point is 01:58:59 River King, truly the most unlikely band of at least temporary allies. The next morning you say your last goodbye is to each other and your ships leave village water behind as they make their way back to Ionia, Zon, Freljord, Noxas, Demosia, Bandal City, and beyond. As the serpent isles disappear behind you, you all stare out to the horizon, ready and now able to achieve your highest ambitions. After all, the universe only moves forward towards his destiny when living creatures chase their desires. But that's not where the story ends boys and girls again.
Starting point is 01:59:47 Now my special brew of rum may not have been mixed with the essence of a god to create a potent cocktail that would surely shock and delight the senses and the soul. But like any intelligent diner prepared for an understock kitchen at their favorite establishment, One must always prepare to order their second choice. And sometimes you even get surprised by just how delicious and delectable that second choice is. And you forget why it wasn't your first. And so, as those seven travelers left our sanctuary of sin in their tailwinds, life continues, as it often does, but with new ambitions and even newer opportunities.
Starting point is 02:00:33 With the troublesome titan sleeping, slumbering in those dark depths lost the time and even death, and that repugnant rapt scallion off to find his can, the waters of the aisles were now open to even the most avaricious. And it all flows down like rivers into the sea, so it wasn't long until then, more than ever. Business was greed and business was good. And with her holiness occluded in that far-off temple, there were no more saints trying to tell the sinners
Starting point is 02:01:08 how to aim their wants and how to go bow good. What's left, you ask? Why? A welcoming salt, a friendly smile, an unbeatable bargain with a paltry prize.
Starting point is 02:01:21 And best of all, is the ruby-haired ruler of the sea scum of Rune Terra. Her quest no longer completed. The Vendris in her heart, burned brighter than the sun in summertime. And so one night when she was extracting some information she thought might be relevant to the location
Starting point is 02:01:42 of Bilgewater's disposed despot from a tight-legged gang member, it was through the screams of agony that are quite inevitable when blade comes to bone that Miss Sarah Fortune heard a gentlemanly knock at her door, putting aside her tools and vexed by the lateness of the hour, She opened the door to reprimand her subordinate for disturbing her while she was hard at work. But it was no subordinate for what is a captain to a king or a demon? The quintessentially dapper and devilishly handsome creature tipped his hat and bore her a splendipherest smile
Starting point is 02:02:22 that twinkled like a young sailor's first-growth gold-cracking and said, the road to vengeance requires a journey I would happily provide. And what happens next? You're all clamoring to know. Well, that's another story for another time. But I'm sure you all learn the moral of this one. Dark and powerful magics of all kinds permeate this fantastical world we all call home. But it is the heart from which the darkest water flows.
Starting point is 02:02:55 and there ain't no shortage of hearts with desires ready to consume and devour their owners. All it takes a little push in the right direction. I may have lost the battle in the short term. After all, what is a king or a demon to a god? But for every champion or hero that wants to chase their desires the right way, there's a thousand fools. Fools willing to hear my song and eager to let me.
Starting point is 02:03:25 let me in. And that is where we'll end the session. Nice job, Mike. Nice job, Mike. Nice job, buddy. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Avengers podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin Tier higher
Starting point is 02:03:47 to unlock Shroud over Salt Marsh, a patron exclusive campaign set on the high seats. You can find that at patreon.com slash Legends of Evangress. If you want to chat about the episode with the Avengers community, Join us on Discord at Legends ofavangers.com slash Discord. We also post content nearly every day on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, so make sure you follow our socials at Legends ofavangers.com slash social. And make sure you check out The Crooked Moon so you can terrify your friends with a folk horror 5E supplement published by us.
Starting point is 02:04:17 Get your own copy at the crooked moon.com. Thanks again, and we'll see you next time.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.