Legends of Avantris - Icebound | Ep. 25 | The Frigid Depths

Episode Date: March 7, 2025

Our band of adventurers finds themselves ensnared in the icy embrace of the underworld after narrowly escaping the savage clutches of ice trolls. With steadfast resolve, they press onward braving the unknown and treacherous path ahead.   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/GXfw14upgVU?si=pX48T3Nq09U3TWEU

Welcome to Legends of Aventress. I'm Scrim Stabberscotch, and you're listening to Icebound. Here's what happened last time. It was a fucking nightmare. I never thought I was going to say this, but I'm very happy to be back in Rekar. It is done. This story is gone.

Based on what you know about dragons and dragon-born culture, is there anything you can tell about this tunnel the way it was? dug into the mountain. There's a small outpost. There's some sort of a wooden structure there. I do not wish to ask you to put yourself in danger, but. You're gonna do it anyway.

You are the best suited. Could you scout ahead? Come on, it's safe. Queen says it's safe, come on. Come in, come in. It's safe. You see what is very similar, but not quite the same the river sledge or sled that you saw in the outside world.

But this one is built to traverse this strange tunnel. Hey, this is the only way to travel. Mr. Stavis cuts, faster! You are rocketing through this magically created tunnel, this tunnel that may have been crafted over many decades or perhaps even centuries. You see one of these outposts. Oh, that's cool.

And you see that they, It opens up into this great, almost ballroom expanse with this large domed area. It's illuminated for a moment what looks like a small figure right in the center of the road. As you crash into whatever this creature is, it is not a ghost. You do not pass through it ethereally.

It is some sort of a white-skinned beast, and it slams into the pilot, into the cowcatcher. You are unable to stop yourself because you are moving faster than you've ever moved in your fucking life. We want to be able to be able to do that. Is everything okay? We had something! We hit something!

It starts to inflate, pull like this. You can see bone shoved through skin start to sink back in and immediately start to close. You can see all of these pieces start to come together. This is happening slowly, but it is, whatever this is, regenerating. What was that? Part of the wall that you tried to protect pushes away and you see more trolls start to push in and down into the tunnel.

You all hit the ground, And, bleary-eyed looking around, you have crossed this chasm threshold, and you've come to have stopped. Dozens of these trolls. All standing there. But unable to cross the chasm without the same means of sick air. There is still more tunnel in front of you. You need to repair the sled that you are on. You are all hurting.

Tichens is barely hanging on by a thread. It has been a hard thing to begin again. You can hear the sound of gusting wind being produced by the broken ice sled that now lies on one side. Rough canvas flaps and shakes in its path. There is the muted sound of your companions all around you. They, too, are only just recovering from the terrific leap you just endured to cross the wide underground canyon in your path. You see they've all survived the crash in the phosphorescent light that spills out from the tunnel walls. But it is the sound of the creatures retching at you from across the divide that reminds you most that you are somewhere within the mountains themselves.

As they scream and prattle and moan, their voices reverberate against the deep stone in waves. You imagine the weight of the rock above you. For those strange wailing creatures, this is their home. For you, it could be a tomb. You've no way of knowing how far you've come exactly. No possible way to tell how much further you need to go. What will you find when you reach the end? Insidious thoughts are hard to push away when you are hurting in a place like this.

The gusting sound stops. The canvas sail stills. The walls begin to dim. The light is gone. It is pitch black. The screen's gone too. Only the sound of your breath and heartbeat fill your ears. It is very still

And it is very cold What happens next Is up to you Ah, cut! Ah! Sound off! Is anyone dead? Said Mr. Stavis, Kutch,

I've never felt more alive. I'm solid ground, much less in the earth. I am alive. I'm gonna go check on Tashan And I'm gonna float down on my bees And go over to where Tyshen is And

Tyshan, you're lying prone and you can feel the cold ice of the trail, essentially the track of this tunnel, the ground of it, underneath your dragon scale flesh, and you're very close to the edge. It's precarious here just on the other side. Thank you. Oh, thank you for saving me. You almost turned into pace there, buddy. I thought I was lost. You went into a fire frenzy. I've never seen you shoot so much flame before. Well, that was incredible, Mr. Fireblossom. We couldn't have done that without you.

Well, I've done that before, probably. I've been that cool at least one of the time, probably. Oh, I'm sure you have. I'm just, I'm surprised by your ferociousness. I don't know what came over me. I think I still killed more trolls than you did. I'm just saying, stating for the record. I don't think you would have killed him if it hadn't been for his flame.

Oh, yeah, that's true. But that makes all five voices, which we made it. Bottom of us, we did it. Let's survey the situation of our vessel. I'm sure we can put it back together. I am not a carpenter, and I will admit. You're all shouting out. A little dark.

Yes, exactly right. It is pitch black. And those of you with dark vision, even you are coming to terms with how pitch black, pitch black can truly be. There is no form of light in any direction. I picked myself up off the icy ground. Stumbling, I'm hurt, bruised. I'm not looking good, but I'll generate flame in the palm of my hand,

try to illuminate the area around this. Dim light sprays out and you all look and see this small, flickering beacon there in the hand of Tyshen. No broken bones? Everybody in one piece. No broken bones and no broken bees. We should walk the rest of the way on foot. I don't think we have a choice.

Well, let's survey the situation. How bad could this possibly be erect? You make a investigation check. We saw the way it crashed before the lights went out, right? Oh, was it bad? At least half of it's down in that... Oh. No, it didn't crack.

Oh, it didn't. It hit the back and slapped down. 15. And then rolled to a stop. So all of the pieces are at least there. With a 15. Allegedly. With a 15, you sort of...

of, do you have dark vision? I do. Oh, yeah. That makes sense. You walk over. We're assisting. And you can see the color fade as you get over and closer to the structure.

It is very much on its side. Incredibly, it is not shattered or sundered. It is still a whole sled. It doesn't look like it would require maintenance to the body. The mast remarkably remains intact. but it is the fact that it is no longer producing wind that strikes you.

It's all very silent, as silent as the creatures that were on the other side of the chasm seem to be now. You also do not see the gem that we've neglected to mention to Mace. There's a sort of a magical object that, kind of like a cat's eye gem stone. It'll actually actually

indicates sort of what time of day it is. That seems to be missing entirely. Oh, no. So do we feel like it snapped off in the crash? It looks like it is, it had dislodged from that spot, and that it might be around. It may have fallen down into the abyss. It's hard to say without additional investigation.

But it also, because, to your ear's point, you could certainly walk. You could do that. With enough time and energy, might be able to write it, realign it back onto its track, get it up and running again, however that magical mechanism may work, and see if you could continue to progress via sled. There is a track on this side, though it's not all, like, destroyed. Looking around, as you walk with your flame, you are careful to step, and there are grooves.

There are two fat grooves on either side of this tunnel floor that are where the railings would typically go. Those seem to be just as they were on the other side, right there. Did this look intentional? Or if something like a bridge collapsed? Make a perception check. Good question. Tisham, bring the light over here. Oh, no way. Big money. 23. 23, big money. You get as close to the other side as you feel comfortable. The floor of this tunnel being made of effectively pure ice. Five, ten feet away from the edge feels extremely precarious.

If you lost your footing, you'd be going down without some assistance or magical means. And so you get to the edge of this tunnel and you sort of look around, and even in the dim light, you can see that this doesn't look like it was a naturally formed canyon. This does not look like it was, that there was a bridge here that just happened to collapse or anything like that. And what tells you this is that there are sort of scorch marks on the walls and the ceiling. There seems to have been some kind of intentional blasts that created this massive fissure. This was created through some means. After the use of this tunnel came to an end,

Do we think it was their strange draconic technology? They went awry. Well, there's scourge marks across the ceiling. Something, something calls it, or blew up, or maybe... Princess. If I can feel my staff and get a sense of North, right, and use that feature, um, I heard it as soon as I said it. I'm going to, or if I could, try to triangulate the direction of the tunnel and the direction of the chasm slash blast and try to see sort of what, which directions they're each going.

You are facing, the entrance of the tunnel is you face out and towards the chasm. That is definitely south. You've been heading northeast-ish. Northeast, I see. Exactly right. And then that means, is it perpendicular? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's as if right here at this particular point,

they decided to slash the tunnel in half. It's a draw line. I can climb down there, give it a quick look. You would go to the bottom of the chasm? What's the worst that can be down there? More trolls? Oh, 10,000 ogresoles. through me.

It's very unlike you that would happen twice, Mr. Sanavascoach. You asked, I'm just saying, if something caused this Barnabos, it could live at the bottom of this chasm. I say true. But if we don't understand what created this, there could be one, two,

there could be 20 more before we make it to the city. Perhaps Perhaps this was done to prevent further spread. Perhaps like a rot that takes the edge of the forest. You burn that part of the forest to prevent further spread. Oh, so what you're saying is now that we're on this side, we should be saved from the trolls. if they felt it was effective to prevent them from crossing, yes.

All right. Sounds like a good thing. Well, we've been on this side for a little while now, and no trolls have got mad us. So maybe they can't get over here. I'm gonna keep looking at the trolls. What are they doing? Um, without illumination, you cannot see to the other side of the chasm. It's too wide. Mr. Fireblossom, you want to aim into the darkness out there to see if you can snike one?

I'll fire something off as far as I can, which is 120 feet. Fire, you spit this fire into the air and you watch as like a firework tail. It flies through the air, shimmering reds and oranges and yellows hit the sides of this chasm, and you can see the minerals on the sides of this wall,

this fell spark. almost glitter as it reaches the other side and goes out against the other side. You manage to nail the opening of the tunnel even without being able to see it. And when it ignites and crashes, sparks hitting the floor of the other side. You see that the ice trolls have all gone.

You, Scrim, see something that no one else sees. A pair of eyes watching you from the other side of the chasm. of a figure, a shape, a shadow that you become very familiar with. And it's briefly illuminated by this red light before it goes dark. In that moment, whoever's close is a scrim would probably be here a, and like take three or four steps back.

We gotta keep going. Whether we get this thing upright, which is my vote, because it goes very, very fast, and it goes very, very far, very quickly. We need to get hiking right now. We can't stay here. Nope, not for a minute longer. All right.

Mr. Yornear, would you mind giving me a hand? And I'm gonna go up to it and try to basically do whatever we can to get leverage. And with both of us hopefully being able to... You have to get between it and the wall of this tunnel initially. You sort of have to climb up and over it. And then you can put your mass, your legs against the wall, and sort of push, that slides and crunches forward.

You can hear it roughly moving against the, even the smooth floor of this tunnel. But once there's enough room and you get it out towards sort of the center and you feel that you can push it over onto its track, you flip to the other side. Come on, quick, quick, let's go. Let's go. Work a little faster here.

Come on, come on. It takes all of your energy and the tremendous strength of Aquini's High. to push all the hundreds of pounds that this sled would be in order to tip it and actually get it to land. And even then when it lands, you worry that it is going to break, and it creaks and it twists, but it does not come apart. With a few additional pushes, you finally managed to sink the rails of this sled back into the grooves, pointing the correct direction down the tunnel, and you seem to have righted it.

The moment that's even remotely level, Scrimmel have crawled up onto the deck of this thing and is in position to basically start it. Come on, come on, come on, come on. There's no time to waste. Let's go. Let's go. Come on. The lever is still in its 50 miles per hour position. Did it seem like it needed that gem thing to run?

I would say that... Is that something you could deduce? It would be easy enough to deduce that if you started to look at it and put tuned you together... While there, Queenie's using... to help with that. But she would be looking around and trying to see if she could see any markings on the ground

where it looks like something would have landed or rolled or trying to essentially track this thing and see if she can find it. Make an investigation check. Yeah. There are plenty of markings on the floor of this tunnel. From the grooves and from the pushing of the sled, from the blast that could be.

It's the same exact thing. Let's do one more and then that's it. Oh, no, we had to call it. We had to call it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it was right. Oh, right. Wow.

Me came in game state. 2024, everybody. You look around and do you have a sort of illumination? And do you have dark vision? I don't know enough about. Oh, I know, I don't have dark. Okay, so with you, but the dim light that you're just starting to look around,

but you can't really leave the perimeter of the dim light that Tyshen is using to help guide those pushing the sled over that you don't see anything. Something's wrong. It's not working. It's for the best. No, no, no, no, no. This is really bad.

Well, if we think that... Oh, sorry, no, you go ahead. Well, if we think this was built by Dragonborn. I don't know if it needed that gem, but what's the size of the... Did it slot in somewhere? Like on a console? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There was a, on the back of the dragon, it's face sort of faced like this towards the mast so that as you opened its jaw with each of the notches, even more and more of this gust would actually hit the sail and accelerate you faster and faster. On the back is that notching handle, and there was essentially a slot right there. Do I think, is it anywhere that I would think

that maybe I could slot in the base of my teapot? I would say that it would be too big. It does not look like it could, that it was custom made, bespokely made for that particular artifact. We'll take less time looking for that thing and getting this ship up and running than trying to walk. I would prefer to keep my feet on the ground. You don't want to ride this ship anymore?

We have no idea how far we have to go down. Could be down here for days if we're walking. There's gonna be no source of water. There's gonna be no source of food. And we're underground. There's not gonna be access to snow for us to turn into water. And if we encounter more of those things, we would not be likely to escape.

In a fair fight, we would have lost. Plus, it's a lot of fun, it's fun, yornia. I'm saying it's fun, get on the damn sled. There's not fun. But I'll, listening to Scram, I'll get up on the sled and I'll sit down on one of the benches. We can find this thing. We're not gonna find it with you guys sitting on the sled.

Bonnebos has crazy legs and closet stuff. You can find it, climb out of the thing. Go look for it. All right. Use your, use your, use your... I do have a bit of a shirt, right? Underwater senses and all that. Come on, hurry up.

I'll go down with you, Bonabose. We can walk around, cast the light, see what we can find. I guess a good plan. Mr. Fire Blossom. First, let's look around here, through the Rebel. Make an additional investigation check. And because Ty Shen is helping with his elimination, you may do it at advantage.

No, I'm just trying. 18. 18. It takes you 15, 20 minutes, and And you completely scour that you go a little bit farther. Maybe it slid. I mean, a gemstone that's thin with like a hockey buck just like maybe rocket forward. You go 150 feet down the tunnel finding nothing.

And it would be evident. You come back. You look at the grooves. You look at where everything landed. You check the sled. You check in the sled. Again, you find nothing. And you are left to the conclusion that likely it fell into the abyss.

Can I try one more thing? Can I go to the edge of the abyss and like I shot across, shoot down? Yes. If I can get a sense. With the understanding that if you get within five feet of the edge, you'll have to make a dexterity check to make sure that you don't slip. Okay. Good.

My bee hand to create like a bee. Wall of bees. Yeah. To hold him over the abyss. Sure. You could create a bee plank. Yeah. diving board of bees.

Yeah. It takes some getting used to. Or like little bee stairs to kind of go down a little bit. Sure. You could kind of walk down them and just... These stairs lay out before you, and you know how secure these platforms can be. You know how much support they can offer you

because you were just carried over the entire chasm by Queenie's Bees, and you step very confidently, making the way... I'm so glad this is free. And now you are effectively standing over the edge. This is where the actual abyss is, but now you're standing on this platform of bees and you're able to look down and just like a flare, it drops down, and at the 121 foot marker,

it extinguishes. It goes dark like an ember dying out, and it still has not hit a bottom. Nothing refracts around the edge. Only that same beautiful illumination on both sides. of the walls, given the nature of this mountain stone, but you do not see a floor. Well, thank you again, Queenie.

Yeah, sorry, I couldn't be more help. I don't think, I think maybe the gem fell in the ravine. I don't think we'll be able to find it. Oh, this is just great! Even if we were to go down, I fired all the way as far as I could, and it just disappeared into deep darkness. Well, you and I, he's going to carry us in no more. We wouldn't have Barnabos.

But we can ride them down there, get closer. Make an intelligence check. It's going to be all right. Nice. That's pretty good. 18. It occurs to you, I think Taichon would have known this. The DC would like 8.

Oh, thank goodness. The nature of the flame going out at 120 feet is because of the limited range of that particular sorcerer. blood magic that you have chronically. That doesn't mean that you couldn't light something on fire and drop it into the abyss. It wouldn't go out because it's not magic. No, we shouldn't light scrimm on fire and drop him into the abyss.

What? Nobody's suggesting that. It would just be like the baron? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Somewhere in the world, Matthew Lillard is suggested. You let him scrim on fire and drop him. I understand why you suggested that,

but how about an arrow? Oh, okay. You could fire a flaming arrow down into the ravine and see what else. All right, buddy, let's do this. Some cool shit. It's like that other scene. And I'll fire an arrow. You fire an arrow and it drops 100 feet.

Getting smaller 200, getting smaller 300 feet. It's hard to say if it's 400 or 500 feet down, but you eventually see it stop and continue to light until presumably the entire shaft of the arrow is consumed by flame and it eventually goes out but there's a floor that's very far down yeah but yeah we don't what's down there and if we run into any more well resistance so here's the thing I could get people except for you weren't here down there way and Barnabose but Barnabose has claws so he could claw down and you and I could fly down and Grim and Yorne could stay up here in the darkness alone by themselves.

Unprotected. Well, that's all I got. But I don't think we're getting this thing moving if we don't find it. I think to check for the gem, we might be able to just fly down, maybe just me and you, as quick as we can and do a quick sweep. And if it's not there, it's not there. But if we see it? Yeah, but what if there's a Baba Goodness from that hit horror film,

Baba Goodness? Well... Ah! I'm sorry, more on your image. Oh, we're good enough. What? Oh, that clears everything. I think we're fucked.

All right. Well, how fast does that thing go? Is it more of a slow elevator speed? How fast is... My bees? Yeah. They're about 30 feet, I think. Ah. It's not too bad.

I'll tell you right now. They are... They're actually pretty cool. They, yeah, they travel at a... I can cast them up to a range of 60 feet from me. They have a speed of 30 feet. And they can carry, it says more than 250 pounds, but I think it's supposed to say up to you, 250 pounds. They can't carry less than 250 pounds.

They can't carry less. Can't do it. Anything less than 250 pounds, they don't even drop. Just die in the weather. And then we got out of bed for less than 250. That's my only ear. If it's less than 250 pounds, Barnabot has to carry it. Alright, yeah, just do a quick look, you're fine.

Okay. Let's go down. Let's do it. This can be. Emphasis on quick. Please. Okay. We'll move 30.

Yes, we're going as fast as we can. Yeah, like an elevator, they just very, very, very, very slowly. No, I would like to think that you silver surfer it. Like, both of you hop onto the same, like, saucer of bees, and you just swim around. Immediately corkscrewing down further and further and further. You keep your hand flame alive and you can see the amazing cracks in this crevasse as you get deeper and deeper. As Tyshen's flame begins to get smaller and more distant

as we watch them go over the edge, Barnabas, Yornear, and Scrim will be standing there in silence. And unless anybody says anything, the only thing that they will hear is Scrim's foot. Do you hear that sound? Oh my God, do you think that's the Baba Ganesh? You think that's the Baba Gnish? I don't think that might be the Bobb Gnish.

Oh, but it sounds like it's coming from where they are! No, it just sounds like it's echoing all around us. You get more and more scared. You get lower and lower and lower. Just as we descend, thinking about, I wouldn't necessarily be investigating, but I'd be wondering to pay attention as this chasm and thinking about the scorch marks up top as we're going down.

If anything would stand out as we descend, that would clue into what led to... I think a perception check. No, twist it. Twist it. I'll twist it. Oh, one's twist. Two twists?

Two twists? Two twists. Two twists. I'll two twist it. I'll go to town some bobaganers. I'm getting on. I'm getting on. I'm so glad you twisted and double twist it.

What were we said? 17. 17. Wait, wouldn't that? Yeah, right. Plus four. Oh, oh, I was looking at persuasion. Oh.

There are these sort of diagonal markings. markings, these scorch marks, and your affinity with fire tells the tale, you start to recognize that these blasts, the flames flew up, but not down, and as though tears were shed away with a series of concussive blasts as you make your way down every 30, 40 feet or so, you're recognizing the same story being told over and over and over again. It is though this was an engineered abyss of fissure that was intentionally blasted away slowly over time, not with one massive explosion, but with many intentionally. This fissure was purposeful when it looks like something blasted this up, very purposefully. You've got to get it up and running.

Because if you didn't know this, this fissure was here. Fissure, fissure. If you didn't know it was here, if you didn't crank up the speed all the way to max, you would never make that jump. We barely made it. Yeah. Thank goodness for scrim. Oh, no, I would never. But, you know, outside of his ear shut.

Nice, nice trouble work back there. Do you smell that? I smell smoke. You smell that? Do you smell that? Oh, my God. It's the boll canoe. Oh, well, I am holding fire.

Oh, all right. Yeah. You get deeper and deeper. and eventually the dim light from your palm illuminates the floor. And it is fragmented stone in all directions. Rubble. It is very plain, however, to see that there are objects down here. There's not just perhaps the gemstone that you're looking for,

but you can see pieces of wood. You can see bits of metal. You can see what looks like debris, almost like a trash heap down there. which is when you suddenly hear this scraping, guttural sound. And a hand, a massive hand emerges from the trash. And you hear this voice, Baba Canoos! And you are both grabbed and swallowed.

Baba ganoosh! What is taking them so long? Nothing like that happens. You would hear these screams. Go ahead and make an investigation. Only if I choose to listen to them. No, you have one's where the work. What's the back later, Mr. Yon.

Oh. I'm a good noosh. All right. I'll twist. We got to be enough. All right. I'll double twist. I'll double twist again.

It's all right. It might be 10. It's just a matter of how long it takes. Well, and I'm helping because I'm there with you. Yeah. Yeah, one extra dime. One more. Exactly right.

You got worse. It's made. It's made. 11, 11, 11, 11. 11. 11. 11. 11. It's a matter. It's a matter of.

of at a certain point you have to actually step off of the platform of bees and get onto the rocket and start to like actually like push away some of these things and your it's it's like um it's like how you imagine uh if you looked underneath a pier or uh at the edge of a dock or something where people have been throwing their trash over and over and over um there's like uh chicken bones and and and and and and and and and and and and and flesh and all kinds of, just random assorted. Chicken bones and flesh. And flesh, rotted flesh, and all kinds of disgusting stuff here,

as if, like your companions, who still remain at the tunnel entrance, 500 feet above you, that it would be fun to throw a token or something off the cliff. And that is what you were scraping through, and finally, your hand flame illuminates, and you see that telltale sort of cat's-eye gem reflection and you were able to pick it up and examining it. Quentin, we got it.

Appears to be whole. Are we're under the earth. We're being stalled by a Bob Ganesh. Ah, ah. What? Did you hear that? It's going to go. It's time to go.

No. Quiet, please. Quix, quicker. No. No. You leave Tyshen behind. He's going to come. You fly back up.

Silver Surferfer. I'll throw us on the Titanic. There's not enough room. There's no room. No room. I'm sorry, you just can't come on. You can't do it. These are huge.

Oh, queenie. No, no queenie. No, no, no, no, let go. I'll never queenie. And so you make your way back up. And the three of you see, unless you have been doing anything, aside from waiting.

What were we up to? I was sitting on the raft. What were you guys doing? I'm looking scream. I would have been extremely evident to the other two people on this raft that something is wrong. I'm more impatient than usual. I would be sitting there at this console waiting and then periodically every like 30 seconds or so looking over my shoulder back at the other tunnel. Looking over my shoulder back at the other tunnel.

After a while of silence. Scream! What? What? Yes, you're on you? Why are you so anxious? What do you mean? I'm just, I'm scrim, I'm me. Just being me.

More than you, sure. Those trolls were chumps. They can't get us. Yeah, the trolls, no, that's ancient history. They're on the other side of the ravine. We're fine, we're fine. Why are you so shaky? You were elated when we were all alive.

You were fine up until Tyshen shot his fire across the chasm. What did you see? It is here. It's back. It's following me again. I haven't seen it in a very long time. And I know that the things that we went through when we were on that island with the lighthouse. I'm not even sure if any of that was real. You know, and yes, I might...

summoned some sort of vestige of it or avatar or something, but it's here, it's right here, it's on the other side of that ravine, and it's going to kill me, it's going to get me, it's finally going to take me. Have you considered that it is impossible for an actual hound or beast to follow us all this way? Have I considered? Yes, I've considered it's clearly not just a normal thing. It's supernatural. It's beyond any of us. It will never stop until I'm dead.

This is why I bring this up because it is beyond the natural and it has followed us this whole time. Whether it is across the ravine or anyone else, it could get you at any moment. Ah! She's just like Queenie. You're just like Queenie. She said the same thing. If it was going through,

to get you, as you say, what would it do with you? The way, I'm thinking, oh, if it wanted to kill you, it would have done it by now. At this point. That's just it. It's savoring my fear and anxiety. It's like I'm marinating in it constantly for the last several decades. And it's just waiting, and it's watching, and it can smell and taste me. And it's only amount of time before it lunges. That's the worst part, the waiting.

The waiting constant. Constantly day after day, month after month for years. Why want to just take me already? Have you tried to stop fighting? Ah, Queenie said that too. Accept it. Don't feel the fear. It is there.

For what reason, we are certainly I do not know, but you are giving it power. or if you think it is feeding on how you're feeling right now. The more you try to sail away from the ferryman, the more it's guaranteed that you will be swallowed by the depths. It's probably the same principle here. I just don't know. It's out of your control.

Either way, except it as a fact of existence of life. Ah ha ha. your natural state. Perhaps it will get you one day. Perhaps it will, but I believe that if you acknowledge it and accept it as constant as the tides. Done. Would it be reasonable to assume that when I was sent to Oger Heaven, that I would absolutely know that that was not Ogar Heaven? Would I have felt closer to this being an entity that I'd ever felt before. I don't know if

you would know that it's not ogre heaven. But the following dominoes of how that might be connected to this curse you have embedded in Jordan or the connection between like when you were there if you felt closer or if you were

even reminded of it or if it felt like two total disparate things I would say is more elusive. Okay. But it was definitely not ogre heaven. say that as you were speaking, the rest of your conversation would be easily overheard by Tyshen and by Queenie because you're essentially sitting in a megaphone in a big echoing

environment. So please continue. You're right. I can't even argue with you. You're right. There's nothing I can do about it. But it's unsettling, to say the least. And I'm struggling with it. Because someday, whether of my own free will, or we meet some horrific end right here on the car. My time will be up, and I know that that thing's going to be waiting for me, whether it's on this side or the other side. And I am not looking forward to that day. If the beast is truly here, we'd make you feel better if we worded it off. How many more spoons are going to stick there in my ear, Bonapos?

I'm running out of room here. You do not have power to word it away. I do. I'll open up my spice box and I'll pull out a handful of salt. Is your stout of scotch? Ah. As I taught you? Yeah, all right.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I basically do every ritual that part of us has ever taught. You've all become second nature at this point and I do them and you're not sure if I do them because I believe in them or if it's just to keep Barnabos quiet. But either way, it's mechanical by now. It's second nature. All right. They can get you now.

And I guarantee you that Miss March and Mr. Fireblossom will be up here with that gem any moment. And it's at that time you hear a screaming as the bees. Baba Ruis! No, Tysha. Tysha and Queenie are stepping off the B-platform just as you conclude your

ritual, and you're all there together, Taichin, with the gem in hand. Oh, my God, you found it! We narrowly avoided the Baba Ganus. The what? It was down there. It was down there, all right. We could hear it noosh, noosh, noosh.

And then it was Baba, Baba, Baba, blah, blah, blah. Get on a, get on a platform. These trolls, you saw the same trolls? We should go. We should go. We should go. We should go. We should go.

We should go. It was gigantic. It was in its hand. and then the eyes and then the... I'll slot the cats out. Under the ship! All right, everybody hang on, buckle up. I'm not going to buckle up.

That's for losers. Get ready, here we go. And I will slowly, once everybody's in position... I tie myself. You place the gemstone inside, and a number of things happen all ones. One, a light appears indicating that it is close to night. And additionally, the surrounding tunnel walls.

Nifty. As this element goes in, seems to resonate with whatever magic also powers the gusting dragon, and the lights come back on. Slowly but surely, the walls, these crystals begin to illuminate more and more and more. And blinking, you realize that you can see again, and that it carries down the tunnel some few hundred feet, and all the way out across the cavern, the connection still seems to be made. and you can see the same entrance where you had thrown your fire bolt.

There are still no ice trolls there, nor is there a shadowy hound. All right, everybody, hang on. We're going to see if this thing still works, and then I'm kicking in an overdrive. The wind of the dragon begins to exhale, and the sail fills for a moment and pretty quickly you're moving.

I can't remember what my notches were. That's one moment. Four? Two miles per hour. Two, four. All right. I think we're good. What do you think?

Bonobos, we're in the clear? All right. Hang tight. Craig and Mr. Severs Goats. I just punch it the rest of the way. We're out of here. Four miles per hour, 15 miles per hour, 30 miles per hour, 50 miles per hour. You begin to rocket down and take off.

You can feel the wind. blowing against your skin, it is still quite cold, but you are appropriately garbed at this point. And about three, maybe four minutes into your journey, you realize that the tunnel is dark. That same illumination that stretches out from both sides is seemingly blocked off. I think as soon as I see that darkness,

I'm learning under Barnabos's tutelage. I immediately pull back all the way down to two miles per hour, all the way back. We're not going to stop, but I pull off the throttle. You pull down, and it takes some time for the momentum to come to a close, but you are sliding forward, and you realize that the walls seem to have been damaged, that it is unable for these crystals to create the elimination that it has throughout this entire tunnel, because the rails are also all mismatched. Do you only get a sense of that

because the rest of it is, again, a very, very dark tunnel. And all of a sudden you feel the bumping, grinding feeling of the railings crashing through. And you hear a twang, the sound of like a bow. Tripwire? Yes, you do hear a trip wire. And I need everyone to make a dexterity savings. Shit.

Do I see this coming? What in the hell? What in the hell? Rock. Here we go again. Let's talk about whether you see it coming. You would be aware that sudden danger would happen. And suddenly you hear that twang-vow.

But would you know that it's a, that it's coming from above you? I think that Dex effects you can see. Given the, if it's supposed to be like a trap, Surprise Trap. Then I probably don't. I would think not. I'm just going to roll. But that's just, that's my take.

This is not good. Ability saves. Dex is 13. One moment, let me roll for damage. Uh-huh, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Uh-oh. Tyshin still has how much? I roll a 22, okay?

I roll a 22. You're about your third hit points. Uh, nine points of acid damage. as you and half as much if you succeeded managing to sort of sense that there's something

coming and you're able to dart out of the way you hear this sound of the twang and all of a sudden like a small wave crashing down acid suddenly splashes across the surface of the deck like rain

then you see two canisters released from both sides of the wall and they swing down and before you have a moment these two kegs collide and explode. You also take, I need to make an additional dexterity saving throw all of you. Oh my god. Oh no. I'm twisting. I'm double twisting this. I'm double twisting. Oh I would see, I would see this coming. I didn't see this coming. Yeah you would have seen seen this coming. I only one more die for that. Okay now I'm doing twisted. So we took a half was what nine nine points of acid damage. Half of you succeeded. Let's go. Oh so half is

Half is four. Half is four. I got a 22 on my roll, and now we're making another one. That's successful. Oh, I guess I should ask what everyone's acid saving throw was. Oh, 22. 13. 23. The DC is 15, so you both take the full knot.

He did, yeah. Thank you. And for, I don't know why we're suddenly very quiet. No, that's fine. I have a plus eight to Dax. I rolled another natural. Two canisters came down and collided. and exploded.

In addition to the acid damage that has rained across the top of this, ice sled, all of a sudden, everything is fire and chaos all around you. Make an additional dexterity saving throw for the fire, half as much on a DC-15 savings throw to succeed. 22 damage total.

Give me one twist. Give me one twist. It does a 9 succeed? It does not succeed. You may want to twist that. I did. Oh, really? Yeah, so my first rule was a 5.

Mm-hmm. With you a plus eight? I do have plus eight, so does a 13? It's 22 points of damage if you don't beat the DC of 15. Yeah, but does a 13 succeed? No, it doesn't. Are you sure that? I'm pretty sure 13 is fewer than 50.

You said 22. I know I couldn't, but I have a plus 8, so I'm thinking. Yeah, that's 22. So I take 11? Geez, Louise. Yeah. This explosion rocks all around you, and the sled is still kind of sliding forward, grinding to a halt,

and you realize that all around you, the floor had been covered in some kind of thick, oily substance as it itself ignites, and you realize that the sled that you are on is on fire. And so is Queenie. We're had been a rabbit, is now a naked mole rat. All of her fur has been singed off. You realize how wrinkly her flesh is beneath the fur.

With the, the, there's a great, the omission of the tunnel due to the everything being on fire, does it, like, if I'm standing in on, like, with the thing, if I look forward, does it look like I could walk forward? Does it look like the tunnels collapsed? Does it look at the end upiding our progress? It looks like battle zone. Looking down the tunnel, even though you're only getting illumination from the fire and from the illuminated tunnel behind you, as you are coming and grinding to a halt, you are looking down what appears to be similar explosions that would have been

similar to this, having scored and scorched the entire interior. It also comes to a complete stop. There seems to be like a flat plug on this end. Oh, if I could see that there was no further progress, I think my initial reaction from the explosion would have been to back off the vessel as opposed to try to go forward off the vessel. That's why I'm asking. To get myself out of the fire, I would have to make a quick split-the-second decision

whether to go forward or backwards. Yes. And if I see that it's blocked off, I think Scrim would immediately try to get off the back of the best. You would turn and roll, and I would say that at this point, any of you who didn't succeed the saving throw against the fire would realize that you are on fire, taking an action to bat it out and put that out.

I would take that action for sure. You take an additional two points of fire damage in doing so. Recovering from the explosion, I would see just the madness and chaos. and I would immediately grab my staff and throw it up towards the top of the cavern and this sort of howling wind and clouds will sort of roll in and I will cast sleet storm on us

all over basically everywhere where I see the fire until the spell ends for a minute freezing rain and sleet fall in a 20 foot cylinder with a 40 foot radius send it on a point we choose within range. The area is heavily obscured and exposed to the flames and exposed flames in the area are doused. Hey! So I would say that that actually encompasses the entire...

This spreading fire was originally amazing, but with your quick thinking, you a thin veil of mist almost swirling around like clouds, hits the top of its tunnel, and out of nowhere, magically summoned, conjured, freezing rain starts to pour down and very, very quickly beats down the flames to the point that there is still oil. It was not all consumed. What should have been burned up very quickly, it's put out by the sleet storm spell.

And you get this smell not just of the burned hair and clothes and wood, but also this like tacky kerosene smell that burns your eyes, your nose, your memory. your mouths, your lungs. Ah! My flax! Great dick, you're here. If there's a trap of some kind. There is something that does not want this ship to make it to the end of this line.

I want to just, knowing that everyone's at least off of fire now, I want to get a sense to see if I can hear or perceive anyone that was potentially waiting or get a sense of what caused. this or what triggered this? Make a perception check. 20. Nice. Not bad. With a 20, you stare through the freezing sleet that continues to rain down and, I'm presuming that you maintain the spell. You look down the tunnel and you can see that on another 100 feet or so from here, there is a barricade. There is something that has been built. This is not a natural wall or anything like that.

The tunnel should be going and continuing, but what appears to have been a built lumber and steel wall has been put up to enclose the space, almost all the way up to the ceiling. You can see that there may be some creases. It does not come totally flush against the wall, as if it was built after the tunnel was made. We need to gather ourselves.

there is an obstruction built by perhaps the Dragonborn I do not know but not the trolls oh this this must be to keep them out or to keep something out

they definitely destroyed the the railway the bridge back at that chasm this has to be more more assurances that the trolls wouldn't have made it to them.

Someone is placing traps in this time. Poor girl. I'll pat the hall of the charred ruin. I presume the canvas is totally fucked. The canvas would have been largely destroyed. The surface is... Looks like Terey's got to it. Yeah, it looks like Terevites have eaten away at the wood.

It's wormed with holes and it's, it looks like you certainly turn it back on, but at this point, this Leds' journey has come to attend. Is the cat's eye gem still intact? It is. Oh, you gave us a great voyage. You did. I guess we're walking. Yonir, you win?

You're right, Mr. Yornear. You were right. Yornear, thinking to yourself, you realize this probably would have been about a 60-minute walk from the tunnel explosion from the castle. I keep that to myself. I told you so. How is everyone feeling? Not good.

I am badly wounded. I definitely don't. I can't keep this up. One more misstep, and we're done. We're done. It's over. What's the likelihood that that's all ancient

Silver Dragon-born technology that just still works just like our vessel here? Well, if we can make it to that barricade, maybe we can get a sense of if it's old or how long it's been here. If they had set it up some time ago to keep the trolls out, It might just be old, old leftover traps.

Well, I don't think that we should face a barricade on account of the fact that barricades imply hostiles behind the barricade. Do we hear any, now that all these traps have just gone off, like the acids explode, presumably a large explosion has just sounded out. Do we hear like anything, like even, like on the wind, any kind of like shuffling noise, any sense of an approaching? How long does sleep storm last? Just a minute. Okay. So it would be raining and then. As soon as the rain stops and everything grows still again and is deadly quiet, you listen

out. Make a perception check. 13. Only the sounds of your breathing companions. I'm in no shape to deal with any sort of enemy force, but we've not been quiet since we've been on this side. We were shouting at the ravine. I mean, an explosion's just.

just gone off and nobody so far has even come to look at what's going on that I can tell I mean if these things have been left here for some time there there might not be anybody left we've seen no sign of life on on this side of the ravine yet so what are you suggesting we investigate the barricade see if there's any more ramshackled buildings and if it's safe we can rest I'll get us some meal we haven't eaten today. Keep your voices down. If the structure is manned, they certainly know we're here. How far is it from us? 100 feet. Oh, so it's pretty close. I know I was downplaying the effectiveness of the trolls, but I got a little

roughed up. I don't know if I'm in fighting shape for another battle. Oh, I'm definitely not. I have much of a choice. It's only 100 feet or so from us. What are we gonna do, rest right here, and hope that if they know we're here, they don't just come and slaughter us while we sleep? No, we need to patch up ourselves up now, and I will wave my hand, and from the ground,

will erect on this spectral blue, almost like a standing stone with like carved on top the head of a mammoth into it, between us. Stay close, and it will help to rejuvenate us. I'm going to cheese healing spirit as you do. Do you want to read the errato though? Do you read that? It's one D6 per turn.

So it's 10 D6. Doesn't it use it up or something? Oh, per target? Hold on. Oh, six times. So six D6. For everybody? We would have to distribute the six D6.

So each one of us basically gets a D6. A D6 plus my Wismont. The spirit can heal a number of times equal to one plus your spell casting ability modifier is the errata. So yeah, if you're healing, it should be six. Sixty-six. Oh, each of us gets 66. Yeah. No, we get 66 total.

Oh, got it, got it. And one of us will get two. I got 11. That's pretty good. Jeez. What is it plus? Is it plus your mod? No, I don't think so.

Oh, it's just a six. Unless that's some other feature. Oh, no. three. I see this beautiful totem from the ground with this absolutely just angelic, you know, Aurora Borealis light pouring from it. And I'm like, ah, and then it ends and I'm like, I didn't do anything. I get one point.

So did I. It's like, the Aurora Borealis is like swirling just above our heads. It really like barely cuts the two of us. That's it. It shows up and you have to race over to it and it's just, it's just good, it's just, it's going back down just as you arrive at. Oh, shit, I was too late. What was that?

It's actually just a burning oven fire. That was beautiful, and then, God, just like that. Thank you, yore near. I feel invigorated. We do feel a bit better. And then I will go, I'm gonna, I'm gonna hit myself with the cure wounds, and if anyone else is looking poorly,

how's everybody looking, I guess? Well, you think we need a short rest. Mechanically speaking. Yes, but at least before we investigate this structure, this is not... I can take it. I can take us. How's everybody looking?

You should take some. Yeah, I'll take some. I'll do some. But... How's scrimm looking? Pretty rough. Not good. It's not looking good.

It was like, I'm all gashed up and like charred, and I stepped near the totem, and I got like a little less charred. And that was about it. It still looks rough. Oh, here you go. Yes. I'll throw, get a cure wounds on scrim. There we go.

11 points of view. Oh, that's huge. If my health pool had originally been a scale of 1 to 7, I was a 2. Jesus. Oh, oh, geez. Yeah. Also a cast cure wounds.

Quee me. Are you feeling okay? Well, no. Not very. I'm also feeling tapped out. Look, I don't want to be, you know, ever the optimist. But these caves outside of those creatures have been empty. There's been nobody around.

I'm kind of with Barnabos. I think that these might be ancient leftover trappings of something that nobody's here. And if we have any luck at all, just a little bit of luck, then nobody will be in that barricade and we can just hold up in there. It's probably empty. Let's be honest, the only thing that's in there is probably the blah blah. Do what? Look, the switch, the first place that we got to with the switches, that was empty.

There was nobody there. There's no signs of life anywhere outside of those horrible creatures. Oh. Oh, sorry, that was just you. All cast, cure wounds, and I will twin it. And I will fire swirl around me. And it will change from red. to gold as it encircles me and I'll push it out and myself and Queenie will feel the golden flames wash over.

You'll see a smile and raise my face. I see this beautiful light. And I go with the touch of my eyes, oh. The flame washes every, but you feel no golden warmth. Do you need another? No. I mean, death comes for us all, you're here. Death comes for us all. How to share and healing energy.

energy. You were like a great thing. You were like to have a headache. Oh, sorry, I'm that queen. I was talking to that ravage over there. Listen, we mean them no harm. If there's anyone over there, they've put all this in place, presumably to protect against the trolls.

Even if there are dragon-born behind this structure, we can talk to them. can talk to them. We don't come with any sort of threat. Mm-hmm. We just come to journey forth. Well, then let us advance, and I can't wait to get stabbed right through my God's damned heart. Let me go first. Yeah, I'll let you go first, Mr. Yorineer.

I'll go with you. I'm very compelling to other dragon board. How about you go behind me? Mr. Yorineer first, then me. And if anyone's gonna get stabbed, it should be us. Should be us. I'm going to, my eye will flash with blue, and I would like to use detect magic

as I begin to approach the door slowly. Okay. What's the range? 30 feet. 30 feet. You start to walk forward, and you have this second sight. through your eye, you can see not just the non-magical sights that anyone would perceive walking into the dark end of this tunnel, but you also can see if there was any kind of

enchantment or any kind of magic, be it a trap or some other thing. And you don't see anything. You walk 20 feet, 40 feet. I need to make a perception check. 27. Oh, man. 27. With a 27, I will say that you do not trip it, but you stop and you realize that you were so focused on magical means of protection or defense that you almost stepped into another trip wire trap.

You are inches away from two thin bands, one at your knee height, and another one just at your eye height. And looking up, you can see another bat of acid. You can look over and you can see ropes connecting additional kegs of alchemists' fire. And you can see that this one perhaps has a third triggering mechanism to something in the shadows. You're not sure. But you stop, and you can feel Barnabos bump up against you just for a moment. Hold!

Do you hear something? What is it? Did you see them moving in the darkness? There are war traps. Oh. Like the same ones? Yes. And others.

Ah. We're going to have to be very careful. Is it avoidable? I do not know. Is it like, can we step over it or? It looks like it's just as I described. It's at your knee height and it's at your eye height. So if you were too very carefully,

do this ducking down and get your other leg over it. There's nothing stopping you from bypassing a non-magical trap. I have two fucking manmit tusks on my back. It'll require an externity check with some form of difficulty class. I see the one that's at like Yorner's knee height. I take my hat off and I'm prepared to go underneath of it.

Mr. Yorne here, this may not be wise that you are able to summon magical creatures, are you not? Oh, she's. Yes. It may be cruel and unusual punishment for such a beastie. I'm not sure if they can feel pain. But if you're able to create some sort of tough beast and have it run through, Bambi's mom, go.

We used to keep some livestock in case we had to raid a pirate's fort and just let it go. Suggestingly summons a bunch of animals and gets them blown up in the cave? We don't know what these traps do. We're assuming that they're only going to go off where the trap is triggered. But what if it doesn't? What if we send these things off it triggers this trap and the entire tunnel behind us explodes? Including where we're standing. Oh, that's a valid point.

Or if it destroys everything here and there's something valuable that we need. We can't be risking triggering traps. And I cannot call the reins again. Ah. And if there are fumes that we can't escape. Ah. I suppose we'll have to be careful. Oh, ah.

Oh, creature, oh foul grim. I may meet you yet this day. Un-fucking believable. Can we proceed with caution? Aye. We're gonna have to. I think that's wise. I will have removed my hat and I will try to squat as low as I can to the cabin floor

and attempt to slide beneath this knee height trip wire. Scrim bravely ducks down and given his height limboes underneath the lowest wire. Make a dexterity check. Okay. Oh yeah, great idea. You are very brave, Mr. Staviscaught. You go ahead and find all of the tracks. That's enough out of you.

Not right? No, fuck. I don't think a 13's gonna be good enough. I think I have to twist this. Probably, yeah. I'm gonna twist it twice because I'm scared to death. I got a 13. You get a 13.

You're all right next to Scrim. Oh no, no, no, no, no. As you duck down. It's just knee height, I can walk under it. And you start to shimmy. And you have your hat in front of you I should have had a advantage. I did take my hat off.

I should have had advantage on the back of your cuff, the collar. Bullshit. You feel it touched the rope, and you're unsure exactly for a moment of what to do. You pull away and you hear this, but it does not trigger. And you are able to make your way smoothly over the other side despite. Benevolent DM. Whoa, that's a little low thing to think.

It's just a trip wire. Be careful, guys. Don't, uh, don't, don't, don't. pull on it. And I take a few more steps away, and then I look around me to see if I can take a few more steps away for when somebody inevitably triggers this thing. I won't be closed. You walk, I would say you could see far enough even with the dim light coming from where it is

and no other source of illumination. You don't have dark vision. I do. You do. Oh, with the dark vision, you're able to splash, splash, splash, make about 15 feet away from the pool of oil that has clearly been poured on the ground. right here at this particular juncture. I get the 15 feet away, and I look at Barnabos,

and I look at Yornear, and I step back up at 10 feet. And I say, all right, guys, I'll wait over here. Good luck. And I try to, like, press myself up against the wall. And, like, all right, here we go. And I'm going to make a dexterity check. Try to be as careful as I can. Dexterity check.

Let's see. 16. You are able to get one leg over the trip wire, another leg over the trip wire. You bend down and you've made it through this thin threshold. You reach the other side and you start to walk towards where a scrimm is. All right. Before anybody else goes, Bonobos, quick get here. There's no traps. Come closer. Get as far away from there as possible. This is not going to end well.

All right, all right. It's real easy. All right. How is next? Maybe no particular reason. I think you should send Queenie next. Send her through. Just, it's easier that way. I'm not picking F-I.

Just send Queenie. I just look at Queenie. Just watch your ears. Duck real low. So the only gap is beneath it. But no, there's a gap along again. It's two top wires. Like, imagine like the edge of a wrestling ring,

but without the center rope. Like, you can go underneath it, you can go through it, or you can go over it. The lowest one was knee height to him. So that's why I figured going to go to. I'll go under it. Okay, make a dexterity check. As you carefully slide.

Dexterity saving, no. Just check, just check. You were killed instantly. That's not. Damn! You get under, you don't feel anything. When you look up, you can see the trip wire is well away from you.

You stand and confidently. My ears droop and I wash. Yeah, you got to make sure the truth. Yeah. Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, quick, fast. Come on, come. You hop over. All right.

quickly with your companion. I didn't want to say anything, but quite frankly, Bonobos went through that way too fast. I would have sent you and then Taichin and God help the big ones. But, you know... Do you think they're going to die? It's very likely. Death comes for us all, Queenie.

I know I said that to you, Boris. And I can't get it out of my head. Lives in that rent-free now. Anyway, good luck. Good luck. Whoever wants to go first, you know... Tai Chen, though, maybe? Maybe, but, you know, we're not picking.

Just, you know, whoever, right? Whatever you guys want to do? Whoever wants to go. Well, Mr. Fireblossum is less flammable. I go forward. Okay. Also a 13? 13 is enough. You choose not to go under what scrim went under. It's also about your knee. Instead, you... Like Barnabose, get one leg over and...

And then your massive driving penis... You make sure that you're... Dale! Dale would have been very... Curse with a huge penis. Curse of the penis the size of yours. You were killed instantly. Actually, you do have to hold your tail and make sure that it does not go slack.

Which is what I call my pants. Exactly right. Gross. Gross. You get to the other side, and then you lean forward and you tripod for a moment before you constantly walk over to your companions. Oh, gosh.

I love them. Awesome powers. So the 90s called. They want their comedy back. The four of you are, um, Thank you. Waiting for Yornear who stands there. Mammoth tusks on back.

Disadvantage in the D.C. is 25. All right. I'm not going to change the D.C. All right. Just, you know, take your time. No pressure. We're going to huddle together far away. We trust you.

Maybe take off those mammoth tusks. Like, push him under or something, buddy. You know he's not going to do that. I know, but I'm still going to try. I look at the wires. I look at the tusks on my back. I look at just how large I am. And you'll see my whole form glow blue

as I shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink, shrink. To the size of a spider. And I look just like an ice spider from the... I'm sure you say truck mouse. from the sci-fi original film, Ice Spirited. I really hope Derek still makes you roll the test. You all watch as she switched down. And for having spent a resource,

I'm not going to make you roll a dexterity check. But very smartly, whoever went last was going to get dreaded on that. So, well fucking done, none. Oh, I do that. I'm on the verge of death here. You ice spider your way over. It's a little strange being an ice spider, and it is even stranger to walk in what is clearly flammable liquid,

but you goop your way over to your companions. I'll try to go up maybe along the wall. Yeah, yeah, it's easy enough. And you hear a sound, and all of a sudden, scrim, an arrow hits the side of your leg, and you look down, there's an arrow in your leg. You take seven piercing days As you hear a voice cry out,

Take that ice trolls! And never will take a quick break. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of Aventress and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night, and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas. Shroud over Saltmarsh.

You can also. Go to The Crooked Moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tome for Dungeons and Dragon Fifth Edition. And don't forget to snag all the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you. You've been hit by an arrow. And you hear this voice. Take that to you, ice trolls.

And once I realize and scream, I, like, fall over, flumph onto the ice. Ah! Oh, God! We are enough ice trolls. We're not. We're ice trolls. It hit the bone. They're talking.

They don't talk. Do they? I don't know. It's been years. Prove you're not ice trolls. Who just shoots people? Oh, stare. I walk over to screen.

Don't pull it out. Don't pull it out. I yank out the arrow. Calm down. And I put my hand on his leg where he was shot and I'll use cure wounds. If you let us a support, You would see very plainly that we're not ice trolls. Do we look like ice trolls to you?

You just shot us out of the blue! It's hard to see, it's dark! Well, if you don't want an anchor smashed in your skull, I suggest you put down your weapons, and we can have a nice, civilized, type conversation about this. Make a persuasion rule. Persuasion or intimidation? Your choice.

It feels intimidated. Yeah. I think. Very cool. It's probably the same. There are enough intimidation roles in the game. I agree. I never think of it.

Yeah. Yeah. I like try to use like all of the skills. History needs to succeed. Yeah. 18. 18 is enough. Ah, we won't shoot.

Can you illuminate yourselves? Yes. You look strange, but you know, I stroll. How'd you get here? We rode one of them ships until the Astrols attacked us and we killed like 15 of them. And then it exploded in a trap, I'm assuming set by you. We are pilgrims. We come from the frozen wastes.

The withered lands. You come from the south. How did you get all the way out here? I can't believe you survived the trove? the trolls? There's a whole chasm. You cross the chasm? Aye. And that should give you an understanding of just who you're dealing with, and that you should not want to raise arms against us, or our ship was icebound here months ago, and we've been barely surviving.

Oh, well... We're just trying to make our way through the mountain, just like you. We'll open up the... A portal and the barricade. You can come through and join us on the other side. Be wary. You be careful. We will, we're very dangerous. Oh, screw you! Careful my ass! You want yourself. What my friends mean? We mean you no harm. Speak for yourself, Mr. Fireblast.

Speak by yourself. Oh, I do not. Well, I say they mean you harm, but we don't mean you harm. We are on a holy quest to complete our pilgrimage. We made it all of this way by our God's Our God watches over us and will see us through, and we just wish to have passage. Yeah, well, we're on a Holy Quest 2 to stay here and be vigilant and watch out for ice trolls. I gotta ask, are you also looking for pots?

What? Oh, that's pretty funny. I just got that. I'm using my pot scraper voice. If anybody got any pots to scrape? I just want to slip into it. You kind of scream around in there. Oh, God.

Oh, you don't say that. Um, you're gonna have to give us a minute. It's, it's tough to get this, uh, hold on. Tack, get over here. Here. Okay. You hear this voice and it sounds oddly familiar, this voice. Oh.

It's not a voice that, uh, oh wait. Yeah. I'm gripping now. I'm creeps. You hear a bunch of pots getting scraped. I must have missed, I don't know what I. You get the session. No, I'm saying, I don't know what joke you guys make.

Oh. I don't know, this is the okay. The voice... Oh my God, when did they clone Tysha? Sounds very familiar. And you hear the stomping of very, very heavy feet get closer and closer to the barricade, and then you hear a great heaving lifting sound

as though some huge lumber is being moved assigned. It's almost like this crashing sound. Pretty quickly, after a few moments, you hear the sound of this unshackling chain and metal, and eventually a small door to one side of the barricade is opened, and you can see light. In addition to the same tunnel illumination that you've become familiar with,

you can see the flickering of what is probably a fire. In the doorway, a figure appears. It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust, but you can see that this is a white cobalt. Well, you coming? Come on. We have met your kind before, and they were kind to us on our journey.

You know, the clan of the Frosthammer? The Frosthammer, yes. Yay. That's right. And you know how dangerous we are. Yeah, I got stamped by one of you when I tried to work you. Yeah.

Yeah. We're almost did, I can't remember. It's a traumatic experience. Come on. We witnessed the near extinction of the Frosthammer. I think back to Secundas. And what would have happened that would not stop them. Mikey should the tear.

I'll proceed. You walk through and you realize that this barricade had been built just before a, um, another one of these hub stations. Walking in, you can see that this is an outpost, an outpost as it would appear if it were manned. There are supply boxes. There is the same structure that you've become familiar with,

but it glows with the warmth of what is clearly a burning hearth inside. And turning to your right, you see the large creature that said, okay, is, An ochre. And there are probably scattered another 11 cobalts all standing there. Bows that they're ready. They've got swords.

All of them are on edge as they look you up and down and sort of take you in. You have had quite a journey, I'm sure. We almost got killed by all your tracks. That's why they're there. Have you ever tried to kill a nice troll? It's damn near impossible. Fire. Acid. Acid and fire.

It's been years since any crossing since the chasm was made, but we stay on watch weeks at a time, regardless. You may want to rearm your traps if they're necessary. We set quite a few off. We heard the explosion, which is why we were ready for your approach. Has a, uh, a troll ever made it across the chasm? Has a troll ever made it across the chasm? Not once? No, we, we usually just stay here and drink. That's what I thought.

No, no, no, no. It's just, uh, pretty lonely out here. Mostly we play fun and games and enjoy booze and tell stories. Well, I can't argue with that. Sounds about as good of your time as anything else. Have you ever played? It's a role-playing game. You just sit around with your friends.

It's called humans and house cats. And you just pretend to be humans doing mundane things around the house. It sounds mundane. Yeah. I used to play it with my brothers and sisters. I can't say I have. I like to play a guy named George who worked in an office. and he hated his job.

Thank you for sharing. He would drink all night long and try and forget that his life was what it was. You would grim. You would purposely take on this character? Yeah. It sounds very sad. Yeah, that's the point.

You're supposed to feel emotions and stuff from it. But at least he had the cats too. No. Keep an O. No, that's just the name of it. It doesn't mean everybody has a cat. You just never encountered the cats. No.

You just look at it. the cats from the bar. So you're saying you're dicing, eh? Dicing? You're playing games, perhaps. Where are we? Yes, we play, we play games, but mostly gambling and, and...

That's what I'm referring to. This has been the pleasant conversation. May we pass? There's nowhere to go, unless you want to walk hundreds of miles. Why, why set up this barricade here, if you're not protecting anything. It protects the network of tunnels underneath the mountain, underneath the spine. Well, if you're protecting the tunnels, how come this one was destroyed?

Wouldn't you want to keep this tunnel active? No, no. To keep the frozen menace, the ice trolls from taking over the entire tunnel area. That's fair. Yeah, I should thought about that. Because there were trolls in that tunnel. They don't come out from underneath the mountains, but they're deadly here. And it's extremely convenient to be able to travel so quickly.

Yeah, no, it really was. I suppose if they're all connected, it really is sorted like one big domo. That's true. And so if they made it past here, they'd make it everywhere. Be everywhere, exactly, yes. Yes.

We actually passed a connected, station or connecting chamber before the trolls. So couldn't they just turn around and just go and find another way? Maybe it doesn't connect to the larger network. It doesn't connect to the larger network. Well, see? It obviously doesn't connect to the larger network. I'm not making sense of this.

Do you have any of those vessels that you could loan to us? The only sled we have here is, and he gestures over, and you can see that there's a full sled, just like the one that you've been riding, which has been scooted off of the main tunnel area. It's unfortunately in need of repair. But the sled will be coming in a few days. Additional reinforcement.

Some of us will be able to return back to Argent home, and we'll be able to get some more food. booth. Arjit Home, is that where you're from? That is our home, yes. Is it an encampment or is it... It's a city, grand city where we all live together, under the princess. Uh, how far is it?

On foot it is a few days travel, many days. And the sled it is, perhaps, some hours. Did you all invent this system of tunnels and... No! No, no, no. This was built here long, long ago. I see. So if we're fixing the head towards the city, Arjun Home, as he said,

would we be able to just take that one since this is broken anyway if we fix it? Don't think that you can fix a sled like that. That makes you say that? It's disabled. You should stay. We can trade. Trade stories and food. perhaps you need something.

Booze, we need booze. Boos! We can trade for booze. Oh, no, we're not going to trade for booze. You're going to give me some booze. To be fair, you did shoot him in the leg without even giving him a warning. Thank you, Queenie.

I thought that... If you saw someone shot someone and you thought that they were an ice troll, would you give them booze? How many ice trolls you see that are barely reaching two and a half feet tall, three with a hat on? He looked bigger in the dark.

I suggest you give me the booze or someone that I can shoot in return. What would you like to trade for the booze? Booze for my leg! No, just no scrimm. Don't give them your leg. That can be arranged. We have an ogre. And the ogre's looking at all of you, like... You're right there, big fella.

Blank twice if you need a help. You... Friends? Yeah. We're friends of ogres. From Ogerton. Yeah. Aye.

How do you know that? Tack from Ogerton. For real? You're so fast, Tack. Ogerton, uh, uh, dragon shows up. And take Tack and others underneath the mountains. Well, well, well, it would appear that perhaps we have an ogre. What?

What do you mean? Oh, how the ogre turns. Hey, tack, buddy. I missed you. You look, and you actually kind of recognize this ogre. Yeah. This is not one of the ones from any of the houses that you interacted with, but once the city had been reduced to the population that you left,

you would have seen at least exchanged glances with any of the ogres. And all of them would have been familiar to you. This is clearly an ogre that has been migrated here, and placed here. How you been, buddy? And I'm gonna walk up to him and pat him on the leg. Confused. Yeah, me too.

How are things going? Oh, you remember when we went on that play? Ha, ha, ha. Oh, yeah. You remember the voyages? Hilarious, hilarious. How are these people treating you here? Okay.

Just okay. You mean not as good as we treated you? Now, hold on just a moment. What are you trying to get at? We've been very kind to attack. I'm just reconnecting with an old friend. I don't believe I was talking to you. Or you saying.

A little mean. No. in cage for the first few days. No! No, that was for everyone's protection. We finned you. Do you hear the way they're talking about you, TAC? Wouldn't it be a shame if somebody...

We suddenly realized how much stronger and bigger and more powerful they were than all of these tiny, puny little people that put you in a cage? We would never do that to you, TAC. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How does that make you feel, Tack? Maybe a little angry?

Getting angry. It makes Scrim a little angry. And I shoot a glance over to this little Colvold. Boy, you know what makes Scrim a little less angry? Some booze. Dren. Why treats TEC so bad? Good question, Tack.

No. Just a moment. These are getting out of hand. Uh-huh. It would be booze, yes? Yeah. It would be my pleasure to get you some. boots. Let me just go back inside.

Maybe get tack a little extra rations and food. Let's get some boots over here. Let's treat TAC a little nicely, huh? You watch as the white cobald who TAC referred to as Dren immediately starts orchestrating the other cobalds, and they sort of feeling the shift of the political winds, start to get around, and you can feel them racing back inside and grabbing some of the stock, the things that they have in inside to perhaps try to appease the situation.

Okay, easy there, Tack. We're here, your friends are here, we're gonna make sure that everything's all right, and you're treated well. And I look over at Barnabos, and I'm like, what's gonna be alright? We're here for you now. Don't worry about it.

It's good to see you. Thank you, Skirm. And he, he like hits you on the head, that rustles your hat on your head, pretty roughly. Alright, let's all just take a moment, Take a deep breath and just be happy we found each other again. Heck, happier now.

When did the dragon come? Aye. A week, less than a week after you left. How many did she take? Taken in batches. I was second to last. Many other cobalts, frost hammers, take us. Why did she take you?

Why? Dren, why? Dren steps up. We, to unite the tribes, to unite Trachar for its own protection. It's important that we all stick together. Do they have a choice

in the matter? You shouldn't have in the door, you shouldn't have to sit. Oh, that was my bad, buddy. You didn't know. I really thought this. was gonna go okay you're fun I'm going to step forward

and kind of unloose the anchor from my netting and just and kind of hold it down low with one hand as I step forward what this young smart lad

seems to be implying is that no less than a week after every single surviving soul in Ogerton won their freedom from the horrible machinations of beings from beyond the stars

I still don't really understand it that their newfound freedom was immediately snatched up by a dragon in your kind yeah the princess rules to Carr we were happy to take how many cobbles are there

there are a dozen or so and they're all racing out and they have bottles with them. And Dren grabs one of these bottles and says, Now, if you wouldn't like mine to drink, I owe this one. And he hands you a bottle. I swipe it, snatch it from him. And I'm looking at Barnabos, I'm looking at the coal bowls, I look up to tack.

I'm like sensing the, sensing the tension. And in this moment of like, relative moment, I get a worded, I look to tack and I say, hey, do you remember, what happened to man. Mannyus, man, you remember? Or Mami? Mannyus. First to go

with the others. He, perhaps, that city? Well, maybe there's still a chance that we'll find him. I'd grab him by the throat, if that's possible. I would say make a tack roll to grab them. I drink from the bottle. This doesn't concern me.

I mean, the rest of you, you are also being offered these bottles. Like, they've spirits out of nowhere. I would just smell it quick to make sure it's okay before, like, you know, it smells like booze before I like, you know, take a sip. Make a perception check. Before, you know, Barnabos rips this guy's head off. Perception? 17. 17.

It has an herbaceous quality to it. Very vet. I drink it. I get a 28th electronics check. I think that hits. You snatch him by the cuff or perhaps even just around the neck. You being your size and him being a Cobold, you're able to almost completely close your hand around without choking him. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa.

We help you. We let you in. We helped them. We had to get them to the city to be protected. Protection from what? from what? There's a war coming. The tribes, they almost swear fealty to the princess, to Sigdis. A war against what? I close my, my, my fist a little bit more. Some greater threat coming. Attacked the princess was by some metal creature. I let

loosen up a little bit. Did you give those poor soul? of Ogerton a choice. No choice. I look at, and look at you or near. Do you wish to live? Of course. Then you will let us have this sled and we'll be on our way. Otherwise, I don't believe I can stop Bar and the Boast from doing what he will do. Make a persuasion check at advantage. Or intimidation, your choice. I think it's all the same. Natural 20. Oh! plus zero or plus one? Somewhere in my heart, I felt someone just win bingo.

20. That's very funny. Straight 20. What exactly was your assertion? Give us this sled and we will be on our way. Otherwise I will not be able to stop my friend. Fine. Take the sled. Take whatever you want. We'll be here waiting for our brothers.

Frost hammers, but if you kill me, I will see you again after I see the princess in heaven. Do what you want. Oh no. I'm tired of all of these false fucking heavens, and I'm gonna like hesitate for half a heartbeat. We are simple, peaceful pilgrims. We'll be on our way. Tack, would you like to join us? I was just thinking the same.

same thing we need a guide we need a guide or if we want to be reunited with the rest of your kind that's well either way I think tax coming with us tack come yes a boy perfect you have stolen from us stolen the hoger tack stolen our booze our sled the booze was a gift that I'm keeping it you'll be wanted men You'll be killed when word comes out. We're just taking TAC back. You stole his life from him. We're giving it back to him.

Do you understand that? Little lizard man. I understand. This may be the last time I speak to you alive. You're not going to make it, are you? And I throw him down. He hits the floor of ice with a sickening crack. And the other weapon-wielding Cobol,

seeing their leader fall down in this manner and seeing him acquiesce, take a step back, knowing the odds are not really in their favor. They don't want to have a fight to the death. Maybe if you weren't magic users, they could take you down. But with tack on your side,

you're backing away slowly. Let me go to the ship. Yeah, let's take a look at this sled. Let's take an extra bottle here. Someone keep an eye on. Taking this. Mine now. Enjoy. Yep, we'll do.

Fuck you too, buddy. Let's go check this thing out. Come on. Come on, Dak. Let's go, buddy. Come on. And we will go to the ship. Or I will go to the ship. You go to the ship, make a quick investigation check, anyone who is looking at the ship for damages or for areas that need fixing.

Natural 20? Oh! 21. With a 21, this feels like it's perfectly intact. What repairs is this need? What's wrong with that? It's an explode into acid as soon as we try to turn it on. Nothing. I was lying. Get out of here. Go on your pilgrimage.

And I will have a word with the princess as well. Don't think that I'm afraid of her. Everyone should be afraid of the wondrous princess. Uh, I'll step forward for the first time. Your princess spared our lives. We came face to face with her and she did not smite us where we stood. We are part of her plan. And I'm sure you have never been in her wrathful presence like we have. So I would think twice about what you may plan to say. For if we have her ear, it doesn't matter who you speak to.

Then take the sled. Kindness is noted. And when, and I mean this, when I see her again, I will let her know that you have done us this favor this day. He does himself off after having gotten up and perhaps you have been blessed. If that is so, I am sorry to each of you. We were going to commandeer your vessel either way. Tate, feel free to hub on, Vlad.

He gets on there and there's a sickening, creaking, a crunch of wood. And you realize that this sled is almost at capacity. Not almost the capacity. That's not true. It's just weighed down. It's not going to be slowed down terribly much. Obviously, they were transporting ogres more than one through these tunnels.

But there's not really a bench to sit on. He seems to know that he just needs to sit on the floor, essentially. And he sits down, and you can see his big bulging belly. I thought that was going somewhere else. We're all piled on, and we hear, like, the creaking of the... the wood underneath of our combined weight, I get ready to start moving the vehicle, and I think, ah, bad news, Ty Shen,

I think you've got to leave the teapot behind. It's too heavy. I'd rather leave you behind. Well, that's definitely not happened because I'm the captain. I drive the ship. If it comes to you or the teapot, it's going to be you. I don't know about that. I got tack on my side, buddy. Did anyone else drink from the spirits?

No. Just me. Uh-oh. Roll 98 for me. 9D8? Yes. Oh, we don't know what it is. Maybe it's healing. Are you sure? Are you sure? Yeah.

Are you sure? Are you sure? Thank you, Matthew Liver. The food's here, by the way. Let me help, buddy. I'm gonna steal some of these D8. I just wanna watch a- Yeah, yeah.

I'll watch shrimp die. Seven, eight if you don't mind. Please. Nine did it. Yeah, it's nine. So you need two more. I thought you had eight. Just need one more?

Here. Thank you. Do I have any... Am I blind? I don't see them. No. I could be blind too. No. What the fuck?

Here we go. Here we go. It's gonna be the greatest mathematical anomaly of all time. Actually, not too bad. Not too terrible. That's five. That's 13, which is 18. Another 9 is 27, plus another 12 is...

39. 39. What is your current hit point value? You're never gonna believe this. 38. Are you serious? You're talking to Scrim, and he looks like he's about to respond to your last comment when his eyes just go, and he falls asleep and slams down on the surface.

Oh, it's just sleep. He goes unconscious and lands on the surface of the sled. He's out. He's completely dozing. That could have been so much worse. Oh. Do I get the sense that that scream has been poisoned? The empty bottle in his hand hits the ground of the sled,

and it's easy to deduce that, looking at it, because the liquid is flowing out, it's going, dook, doong, do, do, do, literally just pooling out on the surface of the sled. He's snoring. So is it, like, obvious that he's okay, and he doesn't need immediate medical attention? Yeah, just passed out.

Yeah, he's just passed out. out. He went from zero to blackout. Got it. I really thought you're gonna kill me and I cast stick on it. Slow death metal music starts playing. And I look at scrimm and I slowly turn and suddenly barnacles and starfish and coral grow out of me and seawater covers on me. You can go! I'm going to turn. Now don't come back. No, that's fine, guys.

We've got arrows. You have one chance to convince me, Mr. Yorineer. I believe I will do the arm as I see the scream's unconscious body and I'll clank the... Oh, you push into first gear into second gear and you start to take off. And as rageful as you are at the deception and the treatment that you have seen to yourselves, to tack, to scrim, they start to diminish as the... sled starts to hitch the rails, grooves into place, and immediately begins to make its way down the tunnel

faster and faster as Yornear accelerates. And in a matter of a minute, you can barely see the orange light of the outpost that was inhabited by the white cobalt frost hammer. You find yourself alone. I'm like shaking with bridge. 15 miles per hour, 30 miles per hour, 50 miles per hour, you are suddenly flying down this ramp,

accelerating up and up and up, farther and north. You can feel that it is starting to turn more and more eastern length via the connection that you have with your staff, for lack of a better word. I'm gripping it. And the five of you find yourselves still heated from your encounter with the frost hammers. And you, and tack is there, looking at all of you,

dumbly. I would have, as soon as I like, I would probably take like a minute or so to calm myself down. Because that's how long rage lasts. Mechanically, I'm gonna taste that. Oh, actually, no, because I didn't hit anything. It would last six seconds. That's right.

Oh, you had to see a fighting. You'd fall off. You eat one grape and it goes away. You fool. And then I would try to like check on scream to make sure he's, or no, maybe Yorny was already doing that. I didn't, no. No. Oh, no.

Or roll 1D4 for me. Two hours is how long you'll be asleep. Perfect. Mr. Sabins Scott! What do they do you? Oh, no. Don't that I'm talking about my teapot. Leave him asleep.

Do you damage him? like slap to slap him? I will slap him in not damage, but if I feel like he won't wake up, I'll start shaking him and just give him a big old open hand. Wallop. If you could roll a 1D4 for me, if he takes damage, he would wake up.

Well, technically. I don't know. It's not worth it. Just like you're like minimum damage, open hand slap is like seven damage or something outrageous, right? It would hurt. It would hurt. What he's gonna say is that technically with the sleep spell or sleep condition, it just takes an action to wake someone up.

It may not be a sleep spell. This is a custom home brew potion. Just fucking punch him in the face. Uh, I think it's five points. Is it five points? My strength mom? Uh, one plus six points. Just straight up.

You take six bludgeoning damage across the face. Enough to kill an average man. Oh yeah, I would almost straight up kill. Your head revolves around your neck like an owl and you just a pleasant. Break. Bees legend has a very important fact. Back to the American measurement system. Oghers are distance, grapes are time, so one grape is six seconds. That's right. That's very important for this campaign. That's extremely important. Thank you. Thank you. You are now going thousands of grapes per hour. thousands It's a range of time Devin' not distance

Till on solo Yeah How much of that did you drink Mr. Samaskatch? No, I only had a I only had a I only had a couple siffs Those bastards drugged me

If you drink as much as you normally would You'd be dead! You're right, I didn't have time I think it's kind of got out of control I only had a few sips. I was saving the rest for when we had our joyride. Unbelievable. Those bastards! I wonder if the other bottles ain't good. The bottle that was in your hand has completely spilled that. But you do have the other bottle in your hand. I would not joke about drinking it. I would just look at it and be like,

bastards! Again, and I would shove it in my pack and hang on to it. That might come in handy later. I don't want to talk about it as we're washing through this tunnel, the wind in our hair. Speaking of Bonobos, you have to stop attacking people. After everything that we did in Ogerton, after everything that we achieved, and after all those poor folk, we're trying to build a new life for themselves. A week! That Bonobus is right, those guys were way out of line! One week!

Listen, I feel the same as you, but we don't know where we are. We're heading towards a strange city led by the Princess of Wrath herself. She's pulling together a war band. We can't, I'm with you. We can free them. We can seek to release them if that's what they want from their imprisonment. But if we do it brazenly, if we come in swinging and we turn a whole city against us, There's no way we accomplish any good.

I will stay my hand when there is a horde of thousands. But in a chamber with 12 tiny cobalds, we could have killed them all in a minute. We don't know what kind of communication systems they have. They surprise us with their ability to travel. You're assuming that the Princess of Wrath doesn't know what happened there already. And that the city we're going to isn't already, forewarned of what has happened and the tack we have stolen.

I do understand where you're coming from, and I feel you in your passion for this, but your rage could cause a lot worse if you don't keep it in check. I'll hear it from the princess's mouth herself, and I frankly don't think that the sniveling of a little henchman is going to draw iron. upon us when we showed our strength and stole the ship by right of conquest. Maybe not. All I'm saying is to tread carefully. And I'm with you if a hundred of them show up and they're all single file, we'd burn them down. One by one. But in a big open, wide open city, we have to be careful. Find a very narrow

mountain pass. Okay. We're on an alleyway. Exactly right. Or that passed in Sparta, with 300 defend it for days against it. There's only five of us. Anyway, I understand. I'm sorry it got a little heated. I apologize. No need for apologies. I just...

I understand. We all just went through the motions in Ogerton, and we figured it out, and after everything, to be captured and thrown in cages again. It was not our goal to free the ogres. It was not our mission. No, but I do agree with Barnabos on this. Just because it wasn't our mission

does not mean that it's not something that we can't do. Perhaps, perhaps it was fate. Perhaps it was the land or the universe or the weird, setting them on the path to experience. what they put their own vassals through. Either way, it's out of our control. Our goal was to remove the beings from another world that we accomplished.

This is a good lesson. We should not accept drinks from strangers. Ah! And we should not threaten. strangers unless we absolutely have to. We are going to a place that we are unfamiliar with. And the last thing that we need is to arrive there as the enemy. Have to deal with the Princess of Wrath in some way.

And doing that, starting with her ire is not how we want. We are making this more difficult on ourselves than it needs to be. So we best hope that they don't have any way to communicate. I think that even if they do, I've known thugs like her, and she may be very large than powerful thug. But a thug all the same. Dragon? We know nothing about her. I?

She helped us get rid of those extraterrestrial beings that were subjugating the ogres. I mean, sure, she did it for her own purposes. She did it nonetheless. What I'm saying is those who value strength above all, her most loyal warlord could be cut down by us. And because we had the strength of armed to kill him, she would welcome us in. Strength isn't always just the strength of arm. That's what I'm saying that I believe is that's what she believes. But I could be wrong.

I could be wrong. Why wasn't you said tack? Huh, buddy? Dragon Yeah, dragon Dragon sexy What? Oh, tack, what the hell man?

Did she put that A man of taste? She put that Ohio Riz on you, Ted? Is that no cap? Skibety toilet Oh, no Gricing up.

For real, for real, on God. Oh my God, it's spreading They're all having strokes That's facts. No, hold on. I pushed back on. Tech, what brought this on? We're talking about dragon.

Yeah, yeah, a dragon with large wings, a tail, claws, horrific powers of strength. And blonde hair. What? What? No, no, no, there's no hair on a dragon. Oh, pretty. They're like half dragon. That doesn't count. You saw the princesses right.

There was no hair on it. I'm just saying this head on the dragon. Oh, you don't wink the dragon. Tack is glad you came and saved him. It was boring at outpost. All right, we're just glossing over the blonde hair thing. No big deal, fine, so be attacked you two. Did she have a tail and the blonde hair and wings all at the same time?

All right, that's all I mean you know. Can you describe her? Blonde hair. Large Wings You just said she didn't have some piece in the air I'm confused, Tack, you got to focus, buddy Can you drop?

Yeah, do we have any, we got any chalk hole or parchment? Anybody got any chalk on parchment? I think there is somebody else It's a piece of chancol Tack, do you have any, any parchment? Somebody get him some parchment? Just do the floor of the sland. Sure, why not?

You pull charcoal from nowhere, and he starts making some marks, and it's basically a stick figure. It's like what Torbeck threw when he thought he was the greatest to artist in the world family. I'll whip up a tack drawing, no way. He draws what is like a hatched hair. He very voluptuous body, obviously. And that's it.

Just those few marks on the floor of this sled that continues to fly forward. You're a great artist, TACC. Beck knows. I like your confidence, buddy. The shut up, baby. Tach noses. He puts an arm around there. I, uh, go back and find other ogres.

Is she a shapeshifter? Shift. Changes form, drag into that. Point up the chop drawing. Yes. She spoke with the humans. Wait a minute. What?

The humans. Uh-oh. In Ogerton, what did she do with the humans? Take with us. I'll go. Were there any of that or? perhaps too sick to travel or too weak. That does not remember.

You said that she spoke with the humans. Did she, she appeared in a human form? Did she, did she offer them an option? She didn't, no option. Commanding. Would I know of the shape-shifting nature of dragons, or of some dragons, or if that's even a dragon thing? I would have you, I think that you would either know or you wouldn't.

I can't imagine that you, if that's something that's true that people who live as long as you're near, I would turn to the world builder himself and ask if that's something that is very commonly known about dragons, or if that's something that would require extremely specialized knowledge. I mean, I feel like you, I'm thinking that like a shape-shifting person is, like the most classic archetypical like folklore biz and I feel like yeah dragons would be like shape-shifting dragons

would be something that might not be like super common knowledge but like someone like your near has been alive for 700 years I think for someone with your age you've heard myths of dragons sometimes taking human form and it's referred to in an almost like deific way yeah this

is a powerful dragon yes She can shift her form into a humanoid visage. Wow, well, so this is the thing that just that this happens? Like, like, this is normal. This isn't like, he's not making this up? This is... her chosen visage form. It is in their nature. What does that mean for us? Anything? I mean, like...

What are you... What ideas are you getting with the Staph's God? No, I'm... I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm Confused. This is the first I've learned that dragons can do this. I assume like I mean if she's in our human form like she gonna be the only human there it must be easy to spot amongst a bunch of cobalds and ogres and Beings of Trachar I mean how many humans have we seen? Just the crew or the vassals and like I mean they were a crazy out of place Horned ones what and brutes and tall bald tattooed pointy-eared folk

and short bearded folk okay why don't you give us a drawing of all everyone you just said he reaches down with the charcoal and do a height comparison with the dragon

do a height comparison with the dragon lady he starts to continue to draw but he runs out of room very quickly he gets he gets he's making these huge gestures. It's kind of like when you write a birthday on a banner and you start off with a big ass B and you don't see any...

And they all look like thick figures. They all look like thick figures. They have some general marks about them that feel very obvious for someone who would know a given race, like what is clearly an orc, perhaps Goliath. The minotaur is easy to point out. You make the same connection with the clans that were described to you by the Frosthammer clam that you initially met by hacks

when you were on the other side of the world, or the continent, I should say. Hmm. It does not change a thing. All right. If this is in her nature, it always was. And so our plan remains the same. I do not believe that it changes anything.

Well, it's good to know she can't sneak up on us. That would have been one. weird, you know, like, oh, as a human, let's just like, you know, trash talk the Princess of Wrath in front of, oh no, it's the Princess of Rath. That would have been awkward. You will know. Well, now?

When you see the princess. Oh, yeah, how will we do that? Tag. Large wings. Just a couple of reasons bouncing around that, huh? Crazy. What a timeline, man. thought here on your car just the six of us I have heard of coasting through an ice tunnel myths of shape-shifting dragons I've never seen it happen myself I did not know of any

additional traits or powers that this comes with but what it means is that now we know she uses this form to conduct diplomacy and so perhaps she will be more open to negotiation than we had once thought. I'll hear her out. We saw what Secundus was capable of. There may be a legitimate threat. She may have actually genuinely decent intentions

as savage and violent as she was. and violent as she is, seemingly. She could have flown down and captured the humans. I gotta say, give all humans! Get all humans! She could have flown down and just captured them all, but instead she chose to appear to them in their own form and worked with them.

Even if there wasn't an option, she might understand a larger threat. There are clearly things at play here beyond us. beyond us. And so I think that this bodes well. TAT. How did the humans, uh, travel? On sleds like the ogres. No cages. Shackles. Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, rising. You've been very helpful, lad, be cool. You've been very helpful, lad. This is a nightmare. Why? Why? I mean, I understand. Ah, this is not good. This is not good. This is not.

good at all. And it's in this moment, about two and a half hours has passed on your journey traveling at maximum sled warp speed when you hear a... And looking up, you can see that one of the metal hanging ringers that hangs off of the mast has been smacked by a bar just passing through the tunnel. That's gotta be a signal. Slow her down. Boop. You boop. And the handle snaps off, and the jaw gets wider and you accelerate. Was that supposed to happen? Sled broken.

Scrumbs said that that was supposed to happen. You have to be fucking kidding me. You hear another bang. They lied about lying. Why is it an immediate, the whole body like leap up onto this thing, and whatever nub of a piece is there, I would be throwing my whole weight in this,

trying to get it to budge to slow down. It would be like taking your fingers and untightening and extremely well, secure. I was an orangutan, I could do it. No, don't stop that again. Wild shape. You've never seen one.

You've never seen one. I know how wild shape works. You have no grace. You're a mere. I'm not a woman. You hear a third bang and you realize that, you realize two things. One, you have caught up very quickly in the tunnel illumination

to see that there is a hub area that you're approaching very quickly. There's only one more of these indicators, these rumble strips, for lack of a better word, to indicate that you need to slow down right now or you will crash into the next of the crossroads. Do we feel like we'll just keep going on our merry way, or do we'll crash into something? Looking through, it's hard.

because there's only 200 feet, maybe 250 feet of illumination, and you're moving so fucking fast that the illumination has not reached the hub. You're supposed to be slowed down by now. This really isn't our fault. I say, I like, this really isn't our fault. Seconds are past. Time slows down.

There's no way. Cast whale. I think back to the moment last session. We're gonna get this at a pulton. And I think about all those calculations I made about, wow, it would be a really idea to shift into a whale right under the mast. It would just snap the whole thing off. It would add weight to the sled. And in that moment, I'll say, step to the back.

And I will walk to the front of the sails and the mast. And I will... All right. Do what you're going to do. In a flash of blue and like Aurora Borealis, I expand into a giant right whale. Do the rest of us die? You burst into a massive whale,

and all of you are shocked to see, TAC especially, yells out, as this whale wraps itself essentially around the front of a sled that has been speeding up. 50 miles per hour, 60, 70, 75, as you enter this small arena, for lack of a better word, this open space where you are intended to slow down and stop and perhaps change paths.

You can see a tunnel whip by you on one side, and you realize that you are cascading for two giant doors on the other side. You crash. You take a tremendous amount of bludgeoning damage. I would say enough to knock you out of your whale-shaped form as you see. smash into this wall, and you burst forward and through,

and you realize on the other side of this, you are hit with blinding light. And tons of whale jelly. Just so much whale jelly. That's magical. And magical bones go in all directions. As you cascade out into this, into the open space, and you realize that you are staring at a city

that you are now crashing through. The transformed body of Yornear crashes and crumbles to the front of it. You're all rumbling and riding. All of a sudden it starts to tip, crashes and spills in all directions. You are crushing through houses now. One after the, after the other, after the other.

You can see creatures jumping to each side until you come to a screaming halt. And that is where we're gonna call tonight's session. Well done. Thanks for watching session, buddy. Thank you, everyone. I instantly had the picture of them riding the shoots in Boston.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it, like, kind of cracks a little bit, and they take the photo, you know. It's awesome. You imagine us. You, man, genius. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Aventures podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl

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