Legends of Avantris - Once Upon a Witchlight | Ep. 26 | Don't Lose Your Head

Episode Date: June 27, 2024

After saving a burning hot air balloon factory the Krew, reunited with Torbek, is set upon by many fey curses...   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/LGRE32rCG_g?si=XmJsTYSlgQ5Zu8FX

Welcome to Legends of Aventress. Dorbeck is here, and you're listening to Once Upon a Witchlight. Here's what happened last time. Get the buckets, you must help me. We have to put these fires out so we can get these balloons working again. One of us, one of us. Trader, as the fire begins to be doused by the water. Fire traitor.

form the master. And quite cute as it smiles up at you. Eat me. He's on fire. The monster jam, jail, jail, jail. The master comes forward. You open your mouth to take in a breath and you watch as smoke pours from Kremie's maw as he begins to form and you watch as in the middle of the room, this entity begins to rise.

The six embers that were burning in the corners of this room are nothing but ash. There's no longer that smoldering bit of flame. What had been this large, fiery elemental is now a shriveled, waterlogged hunk of coal. Is it over? The coals that started those embers and came from Pavlona's cauldron. And that she wanted them back. I don't think she's getting them back. But I wouldn't keep the king waiting for too long.

It says, fine illy, the Baron of Muckstom at once. The revolution lives. We should still cross the bridge as safely as we can and dodged the king. As you unfold it, you all begin to hear words. Duke Icarine, my coals are destroyed, you foul-mouthed, toad. You will pay for this. I will find you. You, you can't hide.

You are all standing in the ruined balloon factory, completely covered in soot and ash. The looking out the window, the floating form of Ragnar Ross is still there as his embers steam and smoke billows up. The members of the soggy court across the way. all encircling or all standing in front of a very large partially submerged gazebo, stare out in horror at what is, bobbing up and down in the water. All of them confused and unsure. As some of their eyes meet yours as you're staring out of the window, it's at this point that down the clothesline that leads directly into the thick fog that swirls around,

what you imagine to be the hut, you notice an envelope as it makes its way down, carried by a creature. And it is here as the bug alofts into the air and deposits the letter to you that it opens and begins to shout in a voice that you have never heard before. I'm going to do it again because I'm going to have to do it later. But it says to some effect that she knows, or she wants her ember returned to her. She's very displeased with the members of the soggy court and their inability to provide her with the embers that were stolen. And she wants them back immediately. She sees what has happened and knows that some of them are gone. And she is, there will be, there will be punishment.

can tell easily from this letter that it was not meant for you, that her, at least as far as you can tell, your presence still goes unknown to her. This letter was meant for the Bullywug that helped you here, the one that gave you the small bee brooch as a sign of good faith, mentioning it could be used to potentially gain audience with King Gullup the 19th. And it is here that you stand the letter floating gently to the ground at your feet. Steam still billowing around you. And so we don't have any sense that she knows that we're here, that we killed Ragnar Ross or any of that?

The letter made it very clear that she realizes that some, if not all of her embers, have been destroyed, and she's very displeased by it. But there was no indication from the letter that she suspected that you had any hand in it. You were not mentioned in the letter. There was no mention of there being additional people in

downfall. It was very clearly a letter that was sent specifically to the Bullywug that had been here, and a letter of displeasure. Was it a fly brooch or a B brooch? Sorry, it was a fly brooch. All right, fellas, we gotta get the fuck out of here.

She clearly knows something went down, but it doesn't sound like she knows who did it, so we got to be, stealthy like and get out. Oh, maybe this will be a rallying cry for the Barger buddies, you know what I mean? The Bunker buddies? Oh, the Bunko Guss, it's wishful thinking. I would have preferred Barclay, too.

Yeah, me too. They love that Bunko, you know? They do. Oh, Frusty, you have a letter, it seems. I'll pick it up. We heard it the voice from it. It screamed at it. It was a howler. I look at it to see if it says anything different or more, if it even has language on it.

it is it does seem the letters started to appear as the words were spoken and it is in a in a very untidy handwriting and you do notice

that there are splotches of swamp water that have appeared on it almost as if the hand that had written the letter was soaking wet at the time it says

what we heard it scream out just now the words are identical but you can see here and I show it to Gricko to so that he can plainly see the swamp water

the drips, the scratchy writing. Is this what that thing said? Word for word as far as I can tell. Oh man, I've been misusing all of these letters for a long time. How do you mean? I mean, would that pronounce?

Is that? Is that Amber? We're going to have to have a long conversation about spelling, aren't we? Or is that? Gosh. This may be poorly written, but it is

written with the correct letters in the correct order. Oh man, I need to get more schmuzzy. We'll talk and I'll fold it up and I'll put it in my pack. All right, let's act casual like we were just walking by, all right? As we leave this

place in case she's looking down. Do we want to collect any of these embers that may or not be left over? I mean, if she's looking for them, it could be a little bit of leverage. Didn't all of them go into Ragnar Ross. Are there any in the drink? I think they all

in a drink. They combine into a mega hive mine final boss. Why don't we all help Frost? Oh, Frosty. Let me keep me pee on my eyes back. Let me take a look. Thank you for your assistance. I will look around. I want to get a sense of if I do think all of the embers have been destroyed because they assembled into Mega Ross

and then got drowned. Ragnar Ross, yeah. Oh, I'm going to see how it's different the color is now that I've been holding it in my hands this entire time. Oh, yeah. That's going to be one delicious 23. Wonderful. With the assistance of your friends, you begin to investigate the room, specifically looking in the corners where the six embers had been. and had been nestled.

This entire place is covered in soot and filled with smoke. It is difficult to look around, but you attempt to, and it's going to take you a bit more time than you'd expect. And so in the meantime, Corbeck, you awake. Your neck is stiff and painful. Neck is stiff and painful. You clearly slept on it wrong. And you realize why very quickly.

As you turn your head to the side, where you would imagine there to be a pillow, you see that the pillow has fallen to the floor and nestled beneath the back of your head is hootsie, curled up and keeping warm beneath you. It is then that you notice, you catch a sight of a pastel yellow bow tied into the fur on your shoulder.

You begin to look around. You've been thoroughly washed and cleaned. Your hair is no longer this dark brown, but almost a... There, you see hints of blonde in there in places. Lighter colors than you've ever seen before now that the mud and muck has been removed from you. There's a soft curl to your hair, and bows tied in all over the place.

You smell of lavender and cinnamon. And it feels strange. You look it down at yourself and you're in these soft blue pastel pajamas with the name Torbeck embroidered on the pocket on your chest. And they're cozy and soft. Your nails on your feet and hands have been trimmed and painted. Cute little designs have been painted onto them. And you look quite cute, if not wholly unlike yourself. Oh, things are finally coming up all torpets. A fire roars in the hearth. There's a tray of piping hot breakfast foods and a steaming mug of what appears to be some sort of bean juice.

And you find yourself in this place. looking around, you recognize that this is clearly the inn at the end of the road, but this is a room far more extravagant than one you had ever seen before. It's three times larger than the one that you stayed in. The trappings in here are ornately carved and they are plush velvets and extravagant silks heavily embroidered with threads of iridescence. And it's, It looks magical. This room is a room fit for an archfay. Torbeck is a natural blonde. This explains so much. Does Hootsie have matching pajamas? Yes.

And also boz in her hair, but hers are pink. Oh, that's fucking adorable. Wow. Torbeck wouldn't know what to do. I guess Torbeck would immediately look around for his friends to see if any of them are around. You open the door and you look down the hall and all the lights are out in every other part of this house.

And as you open the door to the hallway, a rush of cold air rushes past you and you shiver as you feel the chill overtake you. The heat of the room, almost oppressive on your back in comparison to the frigid air that's out in front of you. And as you step forward, the sound of even your footsteps almost echo in here as you hear an unnatural silence.

I would probably shout for twig. No one recognizing that this is the inn, I would probably shout to her to see if she's around. You stand in the hallway. There is a banister, and this area overlooks the main portion of the inn. You look over the banister, and you look over the banister, and you can see this. a living area, the fireplace where all of Twigs' knickknacks were stored, the plush couches, where you enjoyed beam juice with your friends. And it is all completely silent and dark. As you call out for Twig, your voice echoes almost as if you're standing at the end of a very

long hallway, a space far larger than the one that you're standing in. You just hear your voice echo back at you. But there's no response from Twig. This is ominous. Hutsi, as soon as you rouse, Hutsi would have awoken and let out a soft hoot. And when you kind of wake up your dog that's been sleeping with you, we'll kind of like get up and look at you of like, where are we going and just be following you. Okay. I would definitely be keeping an eye out for her or on her.

So if I'm overlooking the area that I recognized from before, do I see the entrance? You see the door and you see the windows. And I won't make you roll for it. It's very plain to see that There is no light coming in through the windows on either the door or the windows against the wall. It's an unnatural darkness, pure pitch black. Do I feel like I could try the door, or does that darkness make me feel like I wouldn't want to open it? You feel like you could try it?

I would definitely try them. I hope I don't get sucked to hell. You jiggle the knob on the door, and it doesn't give. It doesn't feel like it's locked, but, almost as if the door is a facade. It's not a real door. The hinges look to be fake, almost as if this is a dollhouse.

And what you see is just a facsimile of what an inn should be. As you walk towards the door, you do begin to notice shadows. Or as you walk past one of the windows, you do begin to notice shadows moving outside of it. Oh, well, door makes first. First thought was that Tormec will probably die here, but Hootie, you're here, so Gricka would never leave you to die.

I'd scamp her over to one of the windows where I saw the shadow and, like, grotesquely pressed my face up against the glass and, like, try to, like, look out and, like, see what's going on. With your face pressed to the glass, you see what appears to be thick, swirling smoke. Oh. And giant shadows. entities 15 times larger than you are as they stalk past you. You see that it appears that the inn is currently moving, almost as if it is trudging through this smoky terrain and the movement is uncanny and strange giants, absolute monstrous giants, just.

towering outside of this thing. Hootie, what do you normally do when you're stuck here? Do you play cards? Do you know how to play Peanuckle? Oh, who's Torbay kidding? Hoosie will give a little shrug and then walk back into the room and with her Paul She'll kind of pull out like a lily pad with a bunch of like flies forming on it. You can like hold it up to them.

Oh, wow, that's very generous. But that's really not Torbex thing. She just looks down and will like look a little sad at first and then just go back to like looking at the flies and just like smathing and battering around. Surely there must be a way to alert the others. Um, I mean, Torbeck would also not be like super pressed. It'd kind of just be like, well, maybe I can make myself a cup of bean juice. Or maybe there's some of that displacer pee. Um, you.

You say this as you see the shadows move outside of the window. And as the smoke shifts and undulates, because that's my favorite word. Great word. You see a large eyeball, a dark brown iris, gigantic in form. As it focuses into view and stares through this tiny window at you. You see the iris move this way and that, following every single movement you make. I would have weave to it. Do I recognize this idle?

Roll an insight check. Yeah, I guess, no, I wouldn't be insight. What would you roll for recognition? Probably straight intelligence. Yeah, maybe. It's not a good thing. Yeah, perception, I think is good. Perception, I mean perception.

I think Insight could work. I think inside would work, too. Inflip. Yeah. I'm making a wisdom. Which do you prefer? Insight. Not insight.

What am I doing? Perception. Perception. Perception. Perception. Now, Torbeck got a nine. You don't. Torbeck would like to come out now.

I need you to roll a dexterity saving throw for me. Oh, Jesus. Three five. It's the first season of attack on Titan. Oh, 25. Torbeck is very quick. Holy shit. You immediately feel the inn at the end of the road pitch forward.

Your body slams up against the wall. Your face once again pressed against this window as this eye blinks in at you. And then you hear the door open as the entire inn begins to shake violently. And you hear, can you realize that though you didn't recognize the eye, it is clearly the gigantic eye of twig as it looks. through her glasses peering in at you. She's opened the door from the outside as she begins to shake the house, trying to get you out of it.

And with a quick plop, you fall out of the house, write yourself like a cat, and land crouched on the ground. Does Hootsie fall on top of him? No. Hootzie stayed inside. Oh, he's still small. Yeah. Oh, God.

I don't know how long it's going to take for him to get big. I've never knocked someone out of my house like that before. So immediately Torbeck would be like, oh, hey guys! But you guys are here. Oh, hey guys. Oh, Torbeck, you are, you're sure he's going to stay this way for a while? I don't know.

Torbeck, you're tiny and blonde. Is that? I would say I don't recognize you if it wasn't for the horrible fey mechanical monstrosities on your bag. You're looking quite handsome. Don't move. Whatever you do, just try to stand your ground and you'll feel like a platform underneath you. Suddenly lift you up as I use my hand to ascend you to an eye. Watch out, watch out. I don't want to drop you.

You're moving it like really slow, but Torbeck's like that too. It's like going like really fast. Just hold on to the thumb. It's invisible. Torbett rises through the air on your mage hand, but the air is thick with smoke and he's just landed in a thick layer of ash. And what had been a clean, blonde torbeck is now a torbeck covered in swamp and ash

and all manner of dirty things from the floor of this place. The bows, which had been a beautiful pastel yellow, are now all grungy brown and grays. His beautifully curled blonde hairs, once again covered in filth as it hangs

limply and oily against to skin. When the hand stops, there will be a brief moment of silence, and then you'll hear just like soft, high-pitched sobbing. Oh, well, it was nice while that lasted. Oh, no, recognize him. This is going to be a part of the adventure that's like twigsy eyes shrug the bug bear. He's not going to be much use to us if he's this small. I mean, perhaps he can do small errands and unlock locked doors from within. It's not much I can do about that.

Can you do this on command? Like this might come in handy at some point. No, I actually didn't think about it. So, you know, I think I kind of get an idea of what's going on inside of my inn when I'm not in there. And I could just sense that there was something moving around. And at first I thought, oh, it's just tootsie, no big deal.

And then it was like, I smelled something weird. And I'm like, huh? Did Hoot see poop on the carpet? And I was like, oh, it's probably Torbeck. And so I looked into the house, and it was definitely Torbeck. And then I would just go really excited and open the door and let him out. I didn't really think about it.

So it might be like this forever. Torbeck, are you prepared for a life as a tiny, tiny, whatever you are? Tell me if Torbeck can ride in Mr. Cremie's pocket. Oh, yes. What? Here, get closer. Oh, why's it going to be my pocket? I'm Richard Gitt's got some bucket.

No, there's no bag on this. This is just a T-shirt, man. Ah, Mr. Crummy has a beautiful lapel. I'm going to drop him in there if you can just hold it open for you or me. You know what? We're going to compromise it inside pocket. Oh, God, I feel like I'm going to crush him in here. One wrong move and he's just dead.

He's pain. I mean, just don't offend him. He might just grab up and twist. He's not a mammal. Well, shit. I forgot that you don't have nipples. That's on me. I can probably fashion a little pocket out of my vest.

That would be very comfortable for Torbek. Might need to, you know, slice it up a little bit and you know how to stitch, don't you, Grandma? I mean, I can fix things in a pinch, I guess. I mean, he can use his mind. It'll probably be easy for him to do it. To like stitch a pocket.

I mean, this is... Oh, no, he can just fix... I'm just trying to fashion a little pocket in my nugger-hard vest. I'll have giddy, you know, man my clothes if, you know, something tears because he's just sort of handy with tools and stuff. I would like you all to roll a D-20 for me, please.

Gideon, I feel like you'd be able to fashion some sort of miniature Bjorn. And in case you weren't aware, I'm dreading you. Yeah. Yeah. I got a two. 12. Right.

We'll start with the two. A miniature Bjorn, perhaps. Yeah, no, we'll just start with Mike. Gideon, or, yeah, Gideon. Grico. Grico, you begin to feel your body change. So you get taller. Oh.

Your voice changes as you feel an entity present in your body that hadn't been there before. as your eyes look towards Gideon, your archedemesis, the one that took your life, the one that created the Honk Legion. Mikey, will you please be chuckles for me? What, wait, what is happening to me? Oh, my God. Flash! Oh, no, are you guys seeing this?

Am I going crazy again? No, you're dead. I saw pigs eat your flash. No, no, no, this is not happening. Oh, no, I watched the whole thing. myself hovering above my bloated and corpse that had wizard away from

alcoholism long before I expired. Oh my goodness. I mean I knew this happened to Cluffy and when I sucked him back to hell I didn't think would happen so soon. Oh, oh, oh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, hey fellas. This is what happened to me, Grico's

somewhere house stuck inside of Chuggles' mind right now, watching all of this happen. Oh, no, I mean, gosh, I feel like I wear goblin flesh pretty nice. I can warp it into fallow, reanimated clown flesh in a pinch. It actually is quite the EV conversion. Hey, Gideon, what's your favorite animal? I hate this guy.

You know what? It's a pig. Oh, it's a pig? Yeah, I got a lot of big friends, and you've met them. Oh, yes. I mean, God, I mean, I really, I guess you know what they say. You may look very similar to one. Let me just...

I need a lot of balloons for this big boy. Where did he get the balloon? Oh, I need to get some more. Do a little sound effects as I would get a bunch of... I just order him to do a sound effect. And he does. Oh, look, it's...

Oh, I think we need to make a little improvement. I'll pull out a lipstick. Oh, it's still hideous, but it's fitting, and I flick it over to you. Oh, man, I hate it. I hate you. What this happened to you? You were still inside there, right?

I remember being lucidly aware. I have no idea if that's going to be the case for Grico. So I shouldn't be like, hey, Gid, can you please kill this guy? No, absolutely not. We have no way of... As this conversation is happening, you feel constricted in the clothes that you're wearing. You would be much better naked as you become a proud nudist. What's important is that we don't panic.

He may not be a threat to us. We have to be very careful to make sure that there's no possible problem. Do you think you can make this point with your clothes still on? I'm not sure what you're talking. Oh. Oh, here. Give it here. Give it here. Give it here. I'll keep it for safekeeping.

Oh, your belt? Okay. There we go. And it'll just completely disappear into the bowler cap. Okay, robe. I can do that. Oh, it's going to need a fold a little bit and it'll just completely show it and disappear. Oh, that's not coming back. I take the pack off. I take my undergarments off. And I stand proudly.

I don't think that he's a threat. But your shoes are still on. Oh, yeah. I mean, who's going to take your shoes off? What idiot? I'm a proud news. I'm not a psychic. Oh, alright.

It's like people who fuck it with their socks on. Oh, no, I think you really should get rid of the shoes. No, no. I'm going to get the shoes on, Juggles. This is important. I think I can probably give you some replacements that are even more sanitary. Show me the replacements first and I'll consider it. Well, that's not how that works.

It's got to be a little bit of mystery. Make a persuasion check. Oh, God. The Jews, come on. Oh, Rose, what do you do? Show me the replacement, Okay. Oh, let me, what size are you?

Oh, so you're about bengled tiger paw, little anthropomorphized. Okay. Okay, I think I can come coming right up. up. I'm gonna pull out a pair of ridiculous clown shoes that are like a gaudy, um, hair metal band tiger print on them. Nice. Uh, here you go, your own pair of squeaky squeakers. Sticky squeakers. Oh, I've been dead for far too long. I regret making this decision, but I do need to wear my shoes.

Oh, man. I can't believe that this is actually kind of like my body. Yes, it'll be very say aitor. Oh, no. Surely they come off. Oh, goodness. Tuggles, you got me. You have your own pair of squeaky, sticky squeaker. That's a tongue twister. I'm beginning to remember why Gideon killed you. Oh, I don't even remember the joke that I said when I finally sloughed my mortal coil. And now that I feel, you know, I was filled with so much demonic, feverish hatred for you, Gideon that I plan of all the

things that I would do. I was like one of those edgy robots playing high schoolers. And now that I finally am clown-made flesh, maybe it's you little friend in the back of my head, perhaps preventing me from enacting my murderous wishes. That guess that'll have to be something I take care of for next time. Now I'm just happy to feel the disgustingly, overly humid swamp air. on my gray, fallow flesh and my flesh gloves.

Oh, well, I mean, this is a rare opportunity. I look, you know what, obviously, I don't really apologize for what you did, and I don't really apologize for feeding you to the pigs. What else were we going to do? At that point, it was the only option. We'd have to charge for ice. It would have been the whole thing. Oh, yeah.

But what kind of deal you make to make this all happen? I mean, was it sort of like a post-death thing, or like, did you make a deal for, like, when I have that? die some sort of reincarnation bids or like my spirit will carry on oh well I have to be a little cryptic but let's just say you're not the only one with friends on the other side oh can you believe this fellow he thinks oh I have a whole lot of special power that's very generic actually it's not it's actually quite easy to be a warlock you know this is a bigger problem than I realize Gibbs yeah he's a huge dick oh yeah no it's a big problem especially for you

You are listening to this, and you occasionally think of something you want to say. And every time you do, you realize in the back of your head that that's not true. And yet you can't stop yourself from wanting to say it as you are only able to speak in lies. Oh, Torbeck, you look so tiny. You know, you were the only one who would ever knife to me. Oh, here, do you want, oh, why don't you sit on my flower? There's like blood like dripping from like, you know, his orifices. Oh, do it like, what's your favorite animal?

A poodle, gosh. I never, you look like a little bit of a poodle. Hold on one second. I'm going to put you on top of my flower. As soon as you set Torbeck down, he like, there's like a, he like vomits a little bit. Oh. I ready to catch if there's a drop.

I'm trying to make sure Torbeck remains safe. I'm going to create with a I haven't worked with this decision. Hold on, and I'm going to pull out of my hat like those glasses for like mini painting and the shi-d-ch-ch-d-ch-ching. As they'll get really small as I'll pull out

these little tiny tools that are also kind of squeaky and honky as I'm like, okay, we're going to get you a knife little poodle mount. Here you go, Torbeck. Oh, well, if you hate it, then you're... Oh, I love it.

Oh, it's a bit ironic. Oh, well, I guess I'll take it away. Fine. I'm sorry. I just thought I could help you out. And I pop it. This is horrifying. What did you get?

Oh, God. I thought she was going to forget about us. Nope. I'm just going through them slowly. I rolled a 10. I rolled an 8. Okay, thank you. You may continue.

Oh, I'm sorry, Torbeck. So what do we think? Do we try to, like, knock him out, restrain them? Or, you know, should we just, Let's sort of let him do his thing. Well, the last time I punched him, he died almost immediately. You know what I mean?

And I think that's still a grico in there. Yeah. I'm not. Frosty's to be. Always what? My ear is going to get absolutely massive. That's a nightmare. It'll be much of hairs inside of it.

The high realism. You can only be four. Oh, no. Thank you. Uh, two. Oh, no. Please be the winner, Lydron. You look into this giant ear and you see the hair and the crusty ear wax as it coats the inside.

Oh, they're like vibrating. And you are disgusted as your body begins to change. And where had been an alligator folk now stands a beautiful summer alladron. your hair flowing down almost waist length a beautiful, wavy blonde your skin sun-kissed pinkish with almost hints of red

your eye is a piercing green Hey man I love it This is pretty cool, wow! Do you see this kid? Wait, why are you talking like that? Whoa! All of a sudden I feel, I don't know, I feel so warm all of a sudden. Just kind of like, you know, I'm just...

I was just real... Oh, well, blooded. Before and now, I'm sort of like warm-blooded. You know what I mean? You feel the heat of blood rushing inside of your veins? Well, yeah, almost like I don't have to rely on the sun to warm my blood. Oh! What does it feel like to have hot blood running through your veins to describe it in detail? Oh, well, it's sort of like, you know, woozy, I guess.

Oh, is it? Oh, that whooshy? Oh. Yeah, man, I mean, it's kind of... You know, it's pretty cool. It feels nice. Oh, I bet it does. I haven't felt that in many, many, many years. Kind of like, you know, cool, you know, sweet. Oh, man, I bet it does. Gramey, you know, you... Kind of scucks, you know what I mean?

You'd feel warmer with less clothes on. Is that how that works? Oh, yes. It's very freeing. And you can feel the sun hit your body into its entirety. It's wonderful. You know what? I sort of just feel like that feels wrong.

You get colder, in fact. I mean, clothes. I start taking off on my gloves. It doesn't make any sense. Oh, no, give it here. Give it here. Yeah, no, very nice food. Oh, I actually have the food.

I could give you the name of my tailor, but he's dead. I won't take the pants off. Oh, but I'll rip the legs off so that I'm wearing basically like pinstrike purple shorts. Like zip off. Exactly. Yeah, rip them down. Oh, yeah, right into the legs.

Oh, yeah. right into the hat. There we go. I don't need this. There we go. These rippling muscles. This would you feel like every day, kid? Well, I mean, probably.

You know, I mean, it's nice to be strong, but I liked you better before. Are you looking at Kremi right now? Yeah. You fall madly in love with the first person you see. Oh, gosh, darn. Oh, wow. I mean, you know, I've always thought that he has. having hair would be a little bit annoying, don't you think?

But it's actually kind of nice. It's soft. Oh, yeah, that's why it's very annoying to have a full head of hair. Very ugly. The women, the lady hated, actually. I'll rub my ball spot. I was going to say that I liked how you looked before, but I'm like in this version of you. Oh, you think it looks kind of nice.

Oh, it looks mighty nice. You sort of measure a little bit with all pictorial muscles, you know? Yeah. And I'll, like, sort of like, flex a little bit and, like, make them bounce. I'm just so glad. We are married. Oh, all you get home, this whole ironic thing. Well, I mean, you know, it's...

Me too. Me too, Gene. Oh, yeah, you are. Yeah. We should probably get rings, you know what I mean? Yeah, just sort of like ironically, you know, kind of... Yeah. Kind of love you.

Oh, you mean, real? I didn't forget you guys were still here. Oh, I love you, man. Yeah, man. I love your man, yeah. Hold on, I think I have something right here. You're my best mate. You're my best mate.

Yeah. Yeah, you are my best mate, that's for sure. I've had a couple. I mean, we're sort of ironically married, you know, sort of American you're not best mates. Ironically, literally, I mean, there was a whole ceremony, you know, signed papers, we drank. I mean, technically, sort of, we're technically married,

but really, we're just, you know, ironically just best buds, right? There was a wedding cake and everything, I think. I'm pretty sure that was. Oh, well, it was actually a wedding pie. Yeah, no, uh, what's that fellae the name? He was like, oh, I have a peanut allergy. You're speaking of, oh, yeah. I watched him die horrible.

Yeah, yeah, he's very pathetic. Well, listen to him die for like an hour while he was begging for, you know. Well, yeah, that's what he said. Well, he said that basically the peanuts had closed up and the throat of no, not a soul could hear him. And no one could give him aid for the very long period of time that he could have been saved, given the, given all of the excitement of the wedding.

Unfortunately, the second that he dropped with when they started playing a sweet Carolina. So then everyone, of course, ran to the dance floor, and no one saw him. Yeah. Yeah. And then the next one was the Electrum slide. So it was like, no one would come back. Yeah.

Right when you were shouting the loudest was right when the bomp, bomp, bong, bong. Yeah, no, he never stood a chance. Or I just ride over him. Yeah, he's pretty bitter about it. But, I mean, you know, I always try to chipper up his mood. Although I feel like my mood is a little too chipper. your Greek old friend is a little too agreeable. I mean, I feel still that visual hatred towards you,

but I feel like I don't have full control over my own emotions. Hey, I said not word. Hey, Frost! Yes? What's wrong with Gideon? What's wrong with Gideon? That's what I said. The only thing that's wrong with Gideon is that he hasn't accepted his natural form.

Gideon, why don't you join us and celebrate the body, the physique, the... I suppose I could. I mean, you can join us, yeah, feel the sun. Yeah, feel the sun. I take my shirt off. It's just, maybe exactly what we all need in order to enjoy peace, chuckled.

To enjoy peace and... Oh, yeah, absolutely. I think you should really consider taking off your clothes. Yeah, join us. John is right. Yeah, yeah. Don't you worry, you handsome devil. Oh, no, no, you know, look, it's not like

my previous fool was really that bad, but this is pretty cool too, don't you think? Crimmy, crammy, let me just say I loved your previous form, okay? Wasn't bad at all. No, I'm not saying it was dead. But you are a beefcake right now, okay? And I just want to cut me a slice. I mean, I'm a fairy

technically, right? I mean, the whole faith thing is pretty, pretty enchanting. You know what I'm saying? I'm literally... Beguiling? What? Beguiling? I'm beguiling. You think, uh, that's what's

happening to me or I just love you so naturally it's just so hard to fight you just beguiling an endless summer in your heart perhaps you're really leaning harder in the whole ironic thing you know sort of like God's not or like you know kind of getting married technically I just nearly start blinking a little bit more because I'm starting to fall into those eyes okay well I mean you're really laying I'm pretty thick it I mean I don't know man maybe it's the fade thing maybe it's because you're a fairy I don't know what's happening Oh, guys.

Yes, Twig. Oh, what is it? Oh, my gosh. My teeth are getting sharp. Oh. You look the same. No, they don't. Oh, no.

You should probably take off your clothes about it. No. Twig unchained. I bet Twig that no one could handle. Oh. I can throw it. Might you be turning into. I got to get in the house.

I'm going to get in the house. She throws the house on the ground, and she rips the door open. And you see as she tries to force herself in it. But this house is way too small. even for her. She screams and tears at the house, trying to get herself in. She is no longer paying attention to anything that you guys are doing.

Oh, dear, oh, Twiggs. Like all those frogs? She not turning into a box. Oh, a weird frog. You see Twiggs head peek out from attempting to get into the house. That's exactly what happened. That's right. She contracted my name. There's distant owl muffled owl bear screaming. Chuggles, you seem to have a number of solutions in your head.

Is there anything you have that you can eventually cure our friend Twig here? Oh, yes. I have just the thing. Allow me to look at my... Oh, this. Oh, no, hold on. I'll be out pulling out my thing. He's a clang of bottles. Wait, do you have any wine? No, man.

We have to find wine right now. I don't know if I get to take it with me. I don't know how this shit works. One moment. I feel like we're... I feel like this is kind of like the excellent animated film Batman Beyond Joker returns. And so I don't know how long I guess literally what this is. It's pretty cool.

It's a great film if you haven't seen it. Oh, anyway. Oh, here I have the cure for like cancer piece. It'll be like a really dirty bottle and there'll be some mysterious liquid in. And there's a homemade label that's just a special medicine on it. Twig pulls herself out of the in at the end of the road. Tishy, you can cure me? I can.

I have the cure for lycanthropy right here. Here you go. Oh yeah, that definitely looks legit. And like in bright, like colorful letters, colorful letters, it'll say, lycanthropy curse accelerant. Oh, no. I use extra mustard in that one.

Surely you have a solution for the solution. I have the Vicanthorpe cursed acetylary and antidote. Yes, yes, yes, of course. I'm not going to pretend to know how your powers work, but please, quickly. Oh, this, oh, no, not that one, that'll be craving. Did Jockels ever tell you guys he's a quarter?

Oh, isn't this such great news? Did you hear that? No, I didn't know that about Jocles. No, I didn't kill him a manslaughtered him, okay? Can you manslaughter him? You're my best first. Uh, yeah. I'm dying of Wartotism.

No, I don't think that that's true. I mean, he's got some kind of cure to the accelerant for lacquer. Yeah. And as you lift, as you lift Twig, ha! She latches onto you and bites into it. Diabolically clever, we stand no chance. Feed her the medicine, Gideon.

You're sort of like, like, long, all she's attacking, get, I'm going to try to pour the whatever Junkle's Is it a 17 hit? Yeah. She does one point of damage. Right in my friend, I'm squirting blood. Restrator, get in it in.

And this label will be a similar dirty bottle with a different color liquid, and it'll be extra special, extra special medicine for real this time. Oh. I, all the Bjorn I started to fashion to keep Dorbeck in,

or whoever was going in the Bjorn, I don't remember it out. Torbeck was going in the beer. All, Whip twig around and send tire quickly into the barn. Oh, wait. And it'll say extra special medicine for real this time. The real bottle.

No, what are you doing, Michael? Oh, peel that dead label, Gideon. They like hand who be cursed, accelerant, accelerant. She's going to become quadruple wear to tautism. Oh, gosh, I don't mean they even have a stead block for that. Oh, no. What do we do? Well, I guess Gideon have met a very justifiable land,

but wait a minute, if Twig killed Gideon, that means that I can't. Come here, you little bitch! I'll endeavor to tackle chuckles. I'll just put my hand out of Tim and stop chuggles by a horn of his forehead. I can keep wazzy back from him. I'm going to do this at a disadvantage. Do I have no?

Oh, does a 22 hit. Me? Yeah, as you reach out, she lunges forward and sinks her teeth into your bicep, tearing at you, doing one point of damage. I'll use my cat gillity ability to jump forward. Your cat gillity? My cat gillity while I'm gillotine all over the place. And I jump forward and attempt to tackle chuckles before. Do I have griggo stats?

Yeah. I'm going to endeavor to stop Chuggles before he reaches. Seeing the danger that Gideon is clearly in, wear twig. Oh, no, naked furry cab. Oh, gosh. Stuffs. Oh! This is like that time of the convention.

Oh, no. Oh, natural 20. Oh, boy. It's just a grapple, so whatever that would be. So it's your athletics versus my athletics or acrobatics. Oh. Do you beat at 25? I might not be able to do that.

Let's find out. Athletics or acrobatics? Or it's just my athletics? Your athletics is that you're trying to restrain. Oh, you slippery bitch. 22. Oh! No! And you'll feel that my suit and is really slippery and greasy.

Roll another D20 for me, Andy. Okay. I ran towards you in the entire time that I did. I did. I did attempt to grab on you, but I'm assuming I miss. Traitor! No, I will resolve it when I'm ready. Oh, oh.

Oh, thank goodness I remembered to grease myself this morning that I didn't forget my daily routine. You'll slide off as I will attempt you basically lunge forward and grab. No, don't you kill him? I'm gonna try to grab him to sleep. She's going to attempt to bite you. Do I rip her off of Gideon?

I would try and anti-graple him. I don't know. If he's lunging at me, I would try and grab him. They're talking of Warren. Does a 19 hit? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Does one point of damage as she bites into your flesh as you reach out for her. I would like to know if I'm able to pull Twig away before that happens.

I would normally say yes, but not if Gideon is contesting it, because she isn't a baby Bjorn on his chest. Okay. Oh, that's fair. Oh, fuck! How did her teeth get that sharp? My teeth are actually sharp, but like, oh, gosh, is that clown blood? Oh, that's a whole other curse.

Come here. I'll save you, Gideon, so I may kill you later. I didn't know what to do. I'm covered in grease. I'm covered in clown grease. You know, oh, I have to do a contest. Yeah. What's happening, I start taking my, my homemade shorts off because I still have underwear on.

Hey, man, you should put these on. You know, just so you're a little more decent. I'm going to do a twist. Why would I do that? Yeah, I mean, you just sort of like, you know, you're just sort of all out there, you know what I mean? And I'm proud of it. Well, you can be mostly out there without being, you know, all the way, you know what I mean? I do know what you mean, and I'm offended by the thought.

Oh, I didn't mean anything, but, man. I mean, it just would totally chill. I mean, I'm not... I'm just trying to, you know, maintain eye contact up here, and it's just, it's a bit distracting. My eyes are up here, Grimmy. I'm just trying to, you know, I don't know. I just thought I was being nice.

I'll put my short pants back on. You'll get used to it. Everyone will. This is forever now. These are shorts that were made from pants. Do you think I could call them shamps? Oh, that's a good idea to cheer. Oh, fuck!

My flesh glove! That one definitely hits. She's gonna do one more point of damage as she bites your thumb. Oh, my husband! Oh, gosh, I'll not be able to use my special move for weeks or else it'll be very unsanitary. Ah!

Yikes. So what happened with the contest? Is it just strength? Yeah. Athletics. Yeah, you'd absolutely smoke me. I used the twist, by the way. I'm over 20.

16. You, yeah, you attempt, but you are a greasy clown. And as you, just as you slip. Yeah, that's not. And also I play juggles. Yeah, that's going in there. I will do that in a job. But yes, you are a greasy clown.

And as you attempt to rip a twig away from Gideon, he is able to hold onto her as she slides out of your grasp. Oh, I shouldn't have greased myself up this morning. Attempting to bite you again, but the movement is too quick, and she's not able to find purchase on any part of you as she lashes out ferociously. I will fall back on top of Frost after he failed attack. Oh, you always hear a bunch of squeaky and honking. Wait a minute.

And then the rattling of bottles. Oh, you're so greasy, and that frost is so greasy. Oh, he's not wearing a clue. Oh! No! I'm extremely greased up, but where's Torbeck? And I look for Torbeck, because I, last I remember, he was on top of, uh. Torbeck is still desperately clinging to this flower

on his lapel. Screaming that. It's like holding onto those screen toys. He is screaming in a high-pitched voice as you look over to him, but his voice begins to change as his head changes shape. Where they had been Torbeck's head, there is now a donkey's head.

And the loud braying of the donkeys' pierces through this room. It's very hard to hear over the scuffle, but if you listen, you will hear, like a tiny screaming donkey. Oh, my God. I don't think I can do it with that high pace. I would blow up my vocal cords.

It's really good. I'll fall back. I know if it's Tormac or chuckle. And I'll like to be, oh, no, I'm falling, and you will actually see me falling in slow motion as I do it, and you'll hear like a clown chorus clown chorus of bichorns that are playing Ave Maria.

This continues. That's kind of cool. How does we do that? Crimey, you have to protect Torbeck while I wait for Shuckles to land on, I can just get up. How's he falling in slow motion like that? It's remarkable.

Torbeck's just there. He just sort of looks like a donkey. So jump on my hand, Torbeck Well, he falls. Jump on my hand. Oh, boy. What's that gap? Like 400 feet for torment? Unless you bring it right up to the hole. Yeah, I go right up to the chest. So as close as I can to the flower. So it's, it's, it's. I'm full nature right now. You can and you no longer feel compelled to lie.

Okay. As soon as I see the hand very gently, like, reach the lapel as he's falling, I would have to make a jump to the, and donkey scream the whole time. I'm like through the air. I grab him and I dart back. Juggles is a madman. I'm not sure what's happening. It is in this moment that you realize you're completely nude.

And holding a donkey-headed Torvac. And wearing squeaky ground shoes. Wouldn't the post-faity? All of a sudden you feel so. Post-fay clarity. Post-faity. I didn't have done that. Disgusting.

I walk over to one of the burned crates and sat down to our back. I start to press the dissertation the grease off of my cat body. I look around for my clothes. You put them in Chuckles' hat. Is it Chuckles or Chuckles'es? Jurgles, I need my things back. it'll finally land. And as you do, you feel that the smack is your back smacks into the ground.

And as Grico, you almost see as the ghost of Chuckles is forcefully forced out of your body. And as Chuckles begins to float up in the air, he looks down at Grico's body as they're separating. And he's being sucked back to hell. I, uh, it'll look like, uh, what is it, like a Doctor Strange, where they get like, and so I'm like, Aang from the finale where my bat gets him, then it jackshops, oh, oh, no, it's like the pigs, oh, and I'll look down at Gricko and I'll look at Gidding and I'll say, oh, I could get used to that. Oh, as chuckles will fade.

Oh, I forgot I have wine. Oh, that's too bad. I'll land. What the fuck was that? I will go over and presumably my robe and clothes have re-emerged. My robe's gone and... Chocles is gone. In his hat to hell and I'm totally nude in the Faye Wild?

Looks like. Can you do your shoes off? That robe was very important. Maybe your shoes will come off now. No. Does anyone have an extra set of clothes? Oh, he and I started to take my... No, no, wait, wait, wait.

I invented chance. Look, I invented them. I've got to close in my pack just a minute. No, no, I'm very upset. Okay, well, I think they're kind of cool. What do you think, Gibb? Yeah, they're pretty cool. Yeah, I mean, I can probably be rich. I can probably sell some chance, you know?

You think you're to sell chance? Yeah, maybe we just, you know, instead of the whole problem. He looks so beautiful when he's talking about selling chance. It's sparkling. Oh, is it the hair? Is it just my, you're having hair follicles that's, I don't know if it's the hair. I don't know if it's the blood pumping through you.

I don't know if it's just your brilliant chance idea. All I know is that you are one handsome creature. Well, I feel like now that I'm 40% fail, I just feel like I'm just, I don't know, like a different guy. Hey, we're trying to talk over here. All right. You might be inventing chance. Hang on.

You take one more point of damage as she bites into you. I'll stand out and I'll say, Rusty, what? I don't feel so, and you'll hear, as I puked up a bunch of like a colorful circus peanuts. Oh, no. And with honking and squeaking little fall on the ground. And like, any party's favorite little is hit the ground,

and it's just this gaudy, colorful mess. There we go. You're all right? And you look up and you see a clown shoe wearing, towel wrapped around his waist, no upper body clothing garments whatsoever, and a really large backpack, wearing frost. Are you all right? This has been a trying

couple of minutes. Did Bragner Ross do all of that? No, it chuckles. Somehow he returns. We probably shouldn't think too much of that. We just continue on with the floor. You begin to feel your body change, Kremi. As you say this, your face elongates.

Your muscles shrink. Your height decreases. As you become Kremi Lucreux once more. What a stupid fucking idea. I can amend that for you. I'm sorry you ripped your pants off in the anarchy. And the rest of them, don't you need to. the other piece, they went

and chuckle's hat. Oh. Gideon. Though Cremie no longer looks like a summer alladron, he is still incredibly beautiful. And you were right. He was always beautiful, maybe even more beautiful as Cremie. The real Cremie.

Perfection. Oh, thank you, Gid. I mean, it's hard not to develop a little bit of sort of I don't know, confusion after experience and hair follicles and all.

But you know what? A drone on mustache is just as good and I'm gonna like reapply it. Oh, let me get that for it. Let me get that for it. Let me get the lines right for it. Come here. You've gone.

Oh. It tickles a little bit. Oh. Oh. It's okay. You need to. You need to. No, that's pretty good.

Drawing with love. All right, good. You know? Hopefully that was ironic. I'm like, turn. Just sort of fix it a little bit. That looks all right. Thanks, buddy.

And, um, Torbeck, are you feeling yourself again? You seem to have... Torbeck is fun. No, no, no, no. You seem to have a head of a donkey. Window just there. You can see your reflection.

This may be permanent, both the size and the donkey head thing. Oh. Oh, I feel so sad for you. I don't know how you got a donkey head, but why don't you ride on my troll to my troll tusk? What do we think about that? Oh, God. Just another.

Okay, you're a tallback. You look a little shaken up. Oh, no. Oh, what is my thumb hurt? Oh, oh! Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Okay, okay, I'll go to your tool back, caught you tallback. Why don't you ride, and all the large troll tusk that's around my...

You kind of rod it like you came in like a wrecking bull. And I'll place Torbeck around the necklace who can grab onto the two threads and look through as he sits on the troll tusk. Grigo, just make sure that he's totally secure. Even from your height, that would be a fall of perhaps 200 feet. He'd hit the ground like a burlap sack full of vegetation. Let me get him! Let me get him! No! Hey, come down.

Thank you. You're welcome. I'm not turning into a toast. unfortunately you wanted to turn into a weird toad and kill all of us no I don't want to kill anybody but it would be kind of cool to be a toad

it would be cool to be a toad it's very cool I'm quite a toad quite often I'm quite hot and I could eat flies with my tongue and people would lick me oh I mean that's never happened to me personally But I could introduce you to the great spirit Winky. I think it might be able to teach you a finger too.

He's got free eyes and tentacles. Yeah, I like that a lot. You probably hop around with Winky. Sorry, I bit you. Oh, it's okay. I mean, it's a spirit. I don't know, Guy, that looks pretty bad. Oh, that's just a flesh wound.

You think these frog fellas have like a, I don't know, hospital or something? Probably not. I'm not sorry. I bet you though, Grico, because you're a horrible abomination clown monster. Yes, you did turn into a horrible abomination clown monster. Wait, somehow Tugles returned? Yes, somehow. How?

It's old. It's old. We slow it. Toolback. Toolback. Oh, sorry. Torbeck. I hope I didn't blow out your eardrums.

A roll of dexterity saving throw. Replace. Yeah. Oh, I'm going to get a little bit out. Crush by Tollbeck. Oh, it's quite good. I'm going to dread it. Oh, no, it's not a...

Oh, no, it's not as good. All occurring the plan. I'm going to get some Torbeck butt in my mouth. Thexterity saving throw, you, say. Yeah. That'll be a 13. Yeah. You are saying that you're yelling down at Torbeck as he's covering his donkey ears as you're

screaming at him. And as you go to lower your voice and her. repeat what you were saying, Torbeck, you feel your body change. It's all of a sudden, in the blink of an eye, you go from being a mere six inches tall to your full height. But you had been sitting at a top Grico's necklace, and you immediately slam into him as you essentially

uppercut him with the force of your growing body. Oh, oh, oh, my God, he's got a glass jaw. You feel your consciousness almost leave you with the force of Torbeck's growth. Sounds awful. Wow, somebody caught that. Somebody caught that way away. I should, I should,

Torbeck's back, baby. 50 shades of fade wild. You do not fully transform, the donkey head is still present atop your body. Oh, he-ho, He-ho, Doorbeck is full. Fully grown? Yeah.

Fully grown. You broke Gringo's nose. Oh, no! And I'll jump up immediately. Oh, Grico, eh-haw! I took the full force of Dolbe's growth right on the face. Dormac is so sorry. He-ho.

Like, there's some circus peanuts and like rainbow glitter. Oh, why your eyes watering. You can buy my carnival snow cone anywhere. I would try to gingerly help you up. I'm sorry, Greg. No, I feel fine. Thank you, Tulbeck. You don't look fine.

What do you mean? How do I look? I can usually do, I guess. Yeah, after you've been hitting the face. It's okay, Zulbeck. You didn't know you were going to get such a sudden growth all of a sudden. That would hit me in the face. That kind of thing's pretty hard to predict.

Sometimes it just happens, you know? I understand. I think I understand. I miss my robe. It hit old length, quite naturally. I mean, speaking of that, try to think back, Greco, to win you with chuckles. Do you remember what happened in our clothes? Did he have any kind of... You are staring at Kremi as he says this.

His body mostly uncovered. Just his chance. I just got some chance on. Just his chance. I'm dented it. As you begin to see him for what he truly is, a conniving, thieving alligator man. And yet you realize,

The love him. The love increases. All my favorite character attributes. Well, I don't think I put my cane in the hat. Can I look around to see if my cane's still in the... Yeah, it was just your clothes. It was not in the hat, yeah. So it's still there. I would find it on the floor.

Our clothes have been consumed by an Eldridge clown. This is disturbing to me. I spent many years of my life hurting that robe, and now it's gone. What do I remember? What does Grico remember? About what? About when, what is Grico's mind feeling when I got schlooped by? It was very similar to what Frost felt, where you were a passenger inside of your head.

You watched it all happen, but there was nothing you could do to stop it. It was almost as if you were in a dark room watching this through a window, and you were frozen in place. unable to pilot your flesh suit. Oh, I mean, I felt myself short to change and it was like I was in like a dark room with like stars and, there were literally stars and canaries flying around my

head. And I couldn't do nothing other than feel my belagance to all me best mates. Did you get any kind of insights into anything he might have been thinking? So that was chuckles, man. That's that's always haunting me. And I get the sense he's got something cooked

up. I get the sense that he's not just out playing tricks, but something's coming. He's dealing with shit way beyond his ability. I mean, I heard mostly endlessly, but it's very fuzzy. It's very, especially after getting

tall back to the face. Oh, Grico, that sounds he-ho and terrible. I remember this as well, Grico. When I was stuck in the mind, I hear he was sort of more of a... Like that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think back, was there anything that I could... I can think back to remember to answer Gideon's question. What was Gideon's question? If he had... Being controlled by Chuckles, if he had gotten any kind of, like, look into his mind

to get, like, his true intentions, or if he has anything planned, if he's, like, learned anything about Chuckles at all. Um, roll and intelligence. Yeah, I don't want to say anything that I shouldn't say is what I'm saying. I'm going to twitch that because I'm a little curious. I'm going to, I think that's pretty good. Intelligence, you say, that'll be a 15.

There were moments where you, it was almost as if your thoughts mixed and intermingled. And the feelings that were building up in chuckles, you felt them as if they were. your own, an immense hatred for Gideon specifically. A type of evil unlike any evil you've ever felt, just emanating from the mind of this being. There was a moment where you saw surrounding chuckles, seven shadowy figures. That was it?

I mean, there was like, I mean, those chuckles, and he was not very kind, thinking very kind thoughts. It was a little macabre if you ask me. Towards Gideon, and I was just like, oh, me, the snakes, oh no, nothing bad can happen to them, please.

I was thinking as I was here, but it was like, oh, shadowy. It was like, it was, I was expecting, he was like, oh, you were saying, oh, it's clown hell, but it wasn't all fiery and. It was more like silhouettes. Silhouettes.

It was shadows. breathed in flame. It was dark shadows. And it was like, uh, I don't know. It kind of reminded me of like, uh,

cremys. Mm, I mean, what he's doing? And there's seven, there's eight of them. Eight, eight figures.

What does that mean? I don't know. And he's fixing to do unkind things, if you ask me. Well, we know that it's relevant to the witchlight carnival,

right? I was just going to say that. And wait, if the witchlight in our blood and in that we got from who knows where did that to us no French talk about and what if it means

how does this how does this affect how does it have anything to do with to which light? I don't know but it always felt like an unstoppable force and an immovable object on a path to collide with each other and that we've always kind of needed each other,

but we were building towards a point where one of us was going to die. Oh. That sounds like it would be a very epic kind of rivalry story if one wasn't a clown. Yeah. Hey, everybody. Chuggled here. It's time for an ad read.

This podcast is brought to you by our very own Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of aventryans. and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon-exclusive campaign set on the high feed, shroud over saltmarsh. You can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplements,

The Crooked Moon, a folk horror tome for Dungeons and Dragons fifth edition. And don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you so much. Off for you around. We're all standing inside of the burned balloon factory. And you have made no progress. That's true.

For the past few hours. Torbeck's a donkey now. It's true. Torbeck is his normal size, but he still has his donkey head. Though the rest of you seem to have shaken off whatever strange fey magics have overcome you. Frost, you are missing. core parts to your traveling kit you so willingly gave them to chuckles the clown when he inhabited drico's body yes i am standing here in a towel just a little greasy that's all look you oh go ahead so no no oh you sure you don't want these shants i mean i do have some some briefs on

no i've double-rolled it i think it'll stay on i just feel i feel a swampy breeze uh yep yeah I mean, if you're offering to give away your pants, Torbeck will take them. No, I mean, I'm going to keep them all. I'm just trying to help Frost stay decent outside of a town. Perhaps we'll find a merchant where I can purchase an additional set of clothes. I'm just, that robe was irreplaceable. I hope that we find some way to get it back from Chuckles.

All of my clothes went in there, too. Well, maybe it was some sort of portal and it just like placed them somewhere else around the room. Well, we were looking for the embers, which we never resolved from two and and a half hours ago. So perhaps we'll find the clothes somewhere in the vicinity. Oh, I was just going to say in the meantime, we could probably take one of these here non-functional balloons and just like cut up some of the cloth and make you like a poncho or something. Were you not that for Rosalie? I know you're feeling down about losing your very precious hard-earned robes, but that make you feel a little bit better? I mean, it's not quite the tailoring

of the robes you had, but you know, I could do something. And that's a lot less meaning. about your journey, your growth as an individual and also a Cyanic user. Where was it that you put, that Chuckles put, Frost stuff? All on his hat. He's a magic portal hat. Oh, I don't have a hat. Oh. Where Chuckles get his hat?

I don't know. From the clown store? Was that a thing? That sucks. It might have been clown college. He's all talking about clown college. It might be like a graduation gift. gift or something.

I thought you had a cool hat that made you look like Indiana Jones from that major image. Oh no, I mean, I thought about that, but then Crummy made fun of me so much that I stopped wearing it. That's right. I threw that in the dumpster a long time ago. They put like teeth around it and he thought it looked real cool. I thought it looked very cool. Oh, more like Crocodile than this. Yeah, I thought it looked quite handsome.

I thought I pulled it off and Crummy just would make fun of me every time I walked by and I just, I threw it, I threw it away. That's kind of messed up. up. Griggle, you're sure you don't have cremmy in my things on your person in any...

You don't have a hat of any sort? I hope I didn't swallow it. I feel like is this peanut-shaped confection. I mean, I don't think I have a hat.

Let me dig her out in here. I usually like to kind of have the locks flow and speak for themselves. Oh no, you have that hat when you try to relate to Hootsie. And you put it up. on sideways. Don't you have that? Do you have those hats, right? Oh, I'm too having that hat. And I will go

and I will reach in and I will pull out the extremely early 90s fantasy equivalent of a baseball cap. And in my pack. Oh, this one. Oh, gosh. Oh, it looks so nice. Yeah, she looks just like a hat. And you see as she starts to put it on and she begins to disappear. And you can hear the loud clinking noises and things rummings. She tosses out a couple of thimbles.

She pulls out a picture frame with a stock photo of a cute goblin family. She, a couple of candlesticks, a few bits of wooden silverware and bowls. And eventually you begin to see clothes. Frost, your robe, your pants, your shoes, crammy, your items. Oh, thank God.

Grickle, you're so silly. You didn't even realize this is a hat of holding. And she tossed it to you. You can add a bag of holding to your inventory. Oh! Chuckles gave me magic. Chuckles, I know you're a horrible, diabolical clown master man now, but thank you. Do you think that he has access to the portal at any time?

Probably not. You need to worry about. I'm sure that we don't want to put some wine in there just in case, kind of like leaving milk out for... Oh, like a gnome. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or a cobo. Here. I'll put a bottle of wine inside.

You put the bottle of wine inside the hat of holding, and you immediately hear the sound of a honk as it echoes. Oh, that's not ominous or anything. Oh. You put that hat away. I shouldn't wear it. No, no. I'm worried that you'll fall into it.

If you try to put it on, you're just going to disappear into your feet. Well, when I was inside of it, it was just filled with a bunch of garbage. There were some rabbit bones in there. There were a bunch of streamers. Yeah. I don't think they were making very much money on Twitch either. That kind of sucked. There were also some balloons.

Oh, a pinwheel. Yeah, some pinwheels. They're really dusty. Oh, God. Dust is going all over the place. Oh, in other news, a couple kaleidoscopes. While I was looking for my...

my clothes I found that Fire Elementals wallet and all there is in here is a two dollar bill but his name was Ragnar Ross it's a stupid name that is a stupid name I'll go through some other cards how did this guy become a paleontology professor of 24 doesn't make any sense I just put it into the swamp Twitter and she's like oh it says this lost return to Ragnar Rachel huh oh well He probably has a huge, expensive apartment that he almost certainly can't afford. Rent control, you know.

That's how they explain everything, yes. Well, I'm going to reach down and I'll push off the clown bits and the magnum condoms, and I'll pick up my robe, and I'll shake it free, and I'll press the digitization and clean it. There's a spider attached to it.

It's just hanging out. Hey, buddy. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were lucidly conscious. You might have fixing these. And I hold up my chance and the two, like, ripped pant legs. It'll take just a moment. Lay them out here as if they would be together. I lay them out. Okay.

I mend them. You've gone through that horror show. Why is your head still donkey like? Oh, Dorma doesn't know. Huh, that sucks. What are we going to do now? We need to meet with the king now that Frosty has been appointed nobility. Your nobility. Don't I look like a nobility in this fine robe? Now that you're not naked, you look more noble than you did before.

Oh, and the fly brooches. The fly brooches back. No, we still got to find this illet guy. He's the Baron of a Muck stump. We totally forgot about this. The revolution lives. I'm so confused. Didn't he the fella tell us to go me with Dink? King or we're supposed to do that first. I mean, we got to do both at some point. So, you know, either way, we got to do one or the other. Let's stop by the gazebo.

We're not very far from the gazebo. All the broach was supposed to get us an audience with the King or something. Yes. Um, hey, guys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Tormeng doesn't want to be a downer. Heha. Never. But. Torbeck is slightly concerned. about this and he ha ha and he reaches into his pack and he pulls out the bloody blue scarf has anybody said anything about egged and being missing he ha ha no none of the people seem to wear of his untimely desire oh good let's never speak of that again no no that makes you

royalty oh um tourbag is not sure that torment can handle that responsibility he ha. I was just wondering if it was pertinent, heha. That's good, Grigo. We have to establish some sort of normalcy, he-ha. Yeah, it's quite, it's quite you know, addictive,

he-ho. It's almost infectious, he-ha. I think, Tobac, he-ha, you are royalty, and you are now the brigand prince of Prism he-ha. But, he-haw! Hell, he-ha. It seems as

if the herringon rabbits were a uniquely ruled society, not under the monarchical fiefdom of the soggy court and thus by proxy Blightstra, Blightstra, Hiho. And it seemed as if they had a monarchy that was rooted not necessarily in blood, but perhaps by a right of combat. And so, and conquest. And so by the right of conquest and not blood, you have deposed their leader, He-Hop, and therefore have taken up the mantle

representing by that Schof, He-Ha, as the new Brigham President of Prismere, he-hop. Oh, he-wow. Thanks for that, Grico. That's what I think. I can be totally wrong, He-Haw. Well, Lee,

the way up. I propose that you wear it. It may be a sign of power and we just have to make our way across these well this bridge that I believe is quite dangerous and then we'll find a gazebo where the king resides. Well, Frost, Torbeck is

certainly no attorney but that seems like Torbeck would be incriminating himself. Incrimination of taking power, yes. Right of Congress. The mantle of authority. Well, no, I mean,

Torbeck's got the right idea. We know that this Brighen fellow, he was working for the hag. So she might be not too pleased that he's dead. Or unless he presents himself as a very reliable ally.

But what if this Brigham prince who stole a lot of stuff stole things from like the king or other people here and seeing that scarf makes him angry? Here. How?

He-ha. I'm trying to make Tovett not feel like he's, you know. You finish your sentences with he-ha. So, too, too. Yeah. So it would make them angry, he-ha. Tormex getting mixed signals, here. Keep it in your pack.

But it's important that you have it easily accessible, if we need to use it to intimidate, perhaps. Okay. Nice. Oh, dear, he-ho. Thank you, he-ha. But Torbeck isn't always so quick on the uptake, so, for us, maybe give Torbeck a knowing look, or Mr. Cranny can say,

Torbeck, you stupid idiot, do something. You'll hear my voice in your mind, he-ho. Oh, okay, he-ha. You gotta do. Well, I got a 23 on investigation for the embers about two and a half hours ago. We all got dreaded as you were investigating. Yeah, Evah.

The embers are all gone. Ah, shit. They're all gone. They must be in the lake. We've destroyed them, I believe. You threw them in the lake. You know, certainly. I just didn't know if they were going

to be any embers left over. They all sleut together like a hive mind of fire. of fire. Yeah, they created Ragnar Ross and Ragnar Marcel, his monkey companion. I'll miss that one. I would have loved to have seen a charming monkey that was made of fire. That would have been quite nice. He gets put on the bus, I guess, plain real quick.

Yeah, apparently the actor behind Ragnar Ross really hated that monkey. Well, also the Ragnar monkey was unpredictable. Very difficult to work with. All right, well, uh... He said, oh, we got to kill a fucking monkey. Anyways, now that we have discovered that there's no further investigation for Ragnar Ross, let us, oh, you need to decide if we're going to the gazebo or this new person. Oh, go to the gazebo.

Can I, um, can I put a, um, a request out to all of our fan artists? If you could create Ragnar Ross and Ragnar Rachel, their meat cute or their, um, their first, date, I would really love that. It would make me very happy. So if any of you feel like you can tackle that challenge, you'd have my utmost respect. So no one told you your life was going to be this Ragnah way. He-ha-ha-ha. Your job's a joke. You're a Ragnobroke. Oh, yes. I love you guys. I love you. I just want to feel included. I don't know anything about Schman. I'm at the door. You step out of the smoldering building that is the balloon factory.

And it does look like now that the embers are no longer burning, that the smoke is slowly starting to clear away. The building itself no longer seems to be perpetually on fire. And that with time and the moisture in the air, that this building will once again eventually be able to be claimed for its true purpose to build more of the balloons. You don't see any sign of the Bullywug that had been here with you, knowing that he finally went to get some sleep, having stayed up for far too long, trying to keep this building from going up in flames. And you are met with the soggy ground of downfall.

you look back the way that you came, and off in the distance, you can see the balloon that, uh, uh, uh, fgunk. Uffgunk. What? Oh, yeah. You were tiny at that point. Yeah, it was the effects of the Fumurian spittle

that you chomped on. Yeah. Yeah, we met a fellow name of Gung. Yeah. Oh, man. That's quite nice to them all. Also, we should probably tell us. I was not going to tell me this goblin slang.

I thought we were making it too weird. Can you believe that's name? I told him it was a goblin name. We should probably tell them about the Bosco Pops or whatever, the fucking... It's up-gunk Earl of Stink Water. Oh, that's when I'm very up to pour. Oh, you guys are never going to be able to... to believe this, but that's Torbeck's name too.

But you look off back the way you came and you see the balloon that was in disrepair and you can see still on his ladder of Gunk the Earl of Stinkwater continuing his repairs. And it looks like it's coming along quite nicely. Off the other direction, however, you see the rickety bridge that you were told about, the bridge that you are warned about. And it is shrouded in fog. As the wind rolls in and brings the fog with it, it looks precarious.

But often the distance past it, you can hear the sounds of jubilant music, laughter. And you can see just peeking through the fog bits and pieces of what is presumable. the gazebo where you imagine you will find King Gullop the 19th All right, so we're going to do this whole like fake royalty thing and we're just going to go up there and have a little chat? Oh, yes. That's sort of a

one of the other type of questions. You can't just say yes. No, Frosty shows off his new handsome fly It's going, and then we just say, hey, we'd like to chat. I love an ambience. No idea what's going on. That Tormac's just happy to be here. I was just about to say we need to explain what Bosco is. Oh, and as you breathe in the air outside, you begin to feel your head return.

Oh, thank for God. Oh, because kind of getting used to that. What the fuck you keep saying, Bosco? Bunko, fuck. Bunko. Oh, yes. Oh, like Bunko pops? I can't wait to get my drag queen Bunkle Pops. I'm just quite worried about

the legitimacy of one of them. You know, there's a lot of subtext whenever you hear the word Bunko that you probably won't even begin to understand. So if you hear the word Bunko... Do you have any Bunkle Pops? I have some of drag queens. Sorbeck's not sure, but this one

guy wouldn't shut up about Richard and Mortimer. And Borebeck didn't know what any of it. I don't know. I've never heard of Richard Mortimer before, but did you have seen the one of Pickledicks? Oh, that's... Torbeg is interested! I still can't believe that Neil became a multi-millionaire with his stupid Bunko Pop collection. And he said, oh, you got to hustle, bro. You got to keep the hustle and the grind, and you got to collect.

because I guess useless. I can't believe he's made a fool of me. If you hear anyone mention the word Bunko, just smile and not alone, all right? You know what would be really cool? If we could get the limited edition Boerrog with Piece of Bridge? Oh wow, the one with piece of bridge is pretty good. Yeah, it looks exactly like ball rock without piece of bridge, but the difference is this one has a piece of bridge. Well, I mean, I only have one, so I mean... I'm getting very upset right now.

And I'm usually quite good nature. Would you trade for mine for yours? You don't have one. I don't ask the bridge. I just really want it. Oh, oh, all right. Yeah. Well.

Every time I go on Fay Bay, I always check the auctions to see if there's a ballrog with piece of bridge, but it's always sold out first. They always have a regular ballrog. Oh, wow, this is a great deal. No one bit against me, but I didn't meet the reserve price. Why even do that, man? Why not just put it up for the price you want for? that people go buff that.

Were you accessing this Fay Bay on the Information Super High Fay? Yeah. Yeah. What? You wouldn't. You know what? I don't have one of those things that shrouds my eyes pixie from people finding out who I am or what I am. So if I go into a cafe to get some coffee, I'm really worried people are going to steal my identity.

Oh. Well, it looks like you might need NordVPN. our new sponsor, NordVPN. If you were to see it, everybody. Follow the link in the description. And use a code, Adventress 29. They're not our sponsor.

So you're welcome, NordVPN. Yeah, sponsored. They did reject to us, though. They did pick a good. A couple of days ago, what the fuck? Tormac could do a really good quipet. Torham needs toothbrushes. Anyways, let us continue.

Yes. Discussing Bungop-O-Path, we make it way. Yeah, yeah, I'm just, while we're doing this, I'm just going to think about BAL-Rog with Peace of Brin. I think in this world it might be Ballor to make it legally distinct, because I believe a certain estate is quite persnickety about things. Are they? Yeah, have you ever met a Hobbit? A what? See? Exactly right.

I think you... That's from way older editions are kind of. I mean a halfling. It's exactly right. Well, I mean, we know what halflings are. They're all over the place. Yeah, I know. And they love quarter breakfast.

It's legally distinct. Oh, exactly right. We continue across the bridge, towards the gazebo. We have to be very careful as we cross this bridge. Why? We were warned to stay in the southern side. Oh, southern side? Southern side, yes.

Those are opposites. Are we sure? Are we sure we stay on the southern side and not stay away from the southern side? No, I think you gotta stay on the northern side. I'm pretty sure. Oh, I mean, that's like a coin flip. What happens if we get it wrong? Does somebody want to flip a coin in the feet side?

I wrote wooden bridge. That's good enough for me. I guess go down the southern side. Wait! I'm 90% confident that it was the fucking south. Oh, he flipped a coin, which has a one. So seven side it is. That's not how you flip a coin frosty, you've got to call it first.

No, no, I flipped it. So we're we going to split up and one of us goes on the north side and one goes on the south side? We should all commit to a side. If we get it wrong and we all die, we should all die together. Yes, let's commit to the same side. Yeah, what do you think? Yeah, Gideon, you haven't said much lately. Well, I think we should go to the southern side, though, as smart as he is,

Frost, he's always got kind of an approximate knowledge, many things. So I'm talking about Bosco and Zendaya. It's hard to really like lean into him. You guys have to fucking pretend over here that I'm as smart as Frost, all right?

You fucks? Does Frost remember northern or southern? I would ask to make an in-law. Roll in intelligence, chat. Well, gosh. It's probably worth noting whatever site torment goes on will be the wrong side. So you might want to hedge your

Well, gosh. That's where I'm a mindhead. Intelligence, you say? I love mindhead. Welcome to mind. I'm gonna twist it. Oh, no. I'm gonna dread it. Oh. Okay.

You just roll again. I'll just roll again and I'll take the lower of the values. Yeah, it's gonna be, I'll take a nine on that. You are positive. It was the north side. Oh, shit. You're right. I remember now that it was the northern side.

Thank you, Kremi, for reminding me. I fucking told me, you're very convincing. You're always such a persuasive person. What happens if we're wrong? Well, Torbeth, why don't you go to the southern side? And then, because to keep your bad, lucky way from us. No, look, there's a 50% chance we all survive.

I'd rather all of us survive together. What do you think? Oh, great idea. Coltelbe, come of us. You still haven't answered if death is the consequence. Oh, no, no. Much worse than death. Yeah, it was very vague.

It was more of a vaguely ominous friend. Well, wait, North is good and North is bad. Oh, okay. Based on my nine, North is good, Cremant. All right, okay, so you're agreeing with me, see? You're so crazy. All you said is you remember North. What if you just remember that the North is bad?

That was what I was asking. Well, moments ago, I thought that Southern Side was safe, but based on my role of nine, I feel that we should all stick to the norm. I agree. Frost is the smartest person that Torbeck has ever met. There's no way that this can go wrong. That's why, I mean, we're a balanced team, right?

Frost is the brains of the operation. We always listen to him and always works out. Keep him around. All right, while Torbeck is convinced. Yeah. The part that is. You know, Frost, you're so confident why. You'll leave me away.

My pleasure. I'll tell you. Oh, God. I didn't get my fucking shoes back. Oh, I've got these fucking magnum condoms in my room. Torbeck was sure Mr. Grumie was going to make him go first. I clown shoe my way on the northern side of the fucking wooden bridge. We follow behind, I guess.

The fog swirls around you as you make your way towards the bridge. As the day progresses, the wind is getting stronger, as it is swirling. through this valley between the breaks and the Queen's Way. And you make your way forward. This flat wood plank bridge, which spans an arm of the lake, is lined on one side by rows of bullywug heads on wooden spikes. At the center of the bridge, a small figure sits with its feet dangling over one side. The figure appears to be talking to itself in bemoaned tones.

But then the severed bullywaggs nearby erupt in a cacophony of voices, Some indignant, other sympathetic. A few in a more distant row yell. What? I couldn't hear what they said. What did you hear that? Now you shut up. I'm tired of listening to you complain. I hear somebody walking.

You shut up. Nobody wants to listen to you anymore. You failed before the rest of us. You failed too, didn't you? So you be quiet in gullops next. as they all begin to yell and chattery each other. All the heads are just stationary, but like, yelling at each other and screaming and they can vocalize.

Oh, fuck that's a nightmare. As soon as this happens... And this is all on the north side of the brisk. As soon as this happens, the absolutely massively tall to, like, shrink down behind Gricka and, like, be very visibly scared and unsettled and horror. And, like, is, like, trying to, like, shrink up almost behind you

to try to be small and, like, take cover. Torrey is terrified I saw this in my view Now everyone just Stick to the side with the head And who are you? Oh, uh, hello My name is Morning Frost

And we're here to cross this bridge safely, how are you? I'm a head on a stick Are you perhaps One of the previous rulers of this city? Queen Riveter the third Ah, yes, that makes sense Is there any secret

It's pronounced rebeter And I know I was the first Shut up How are you still alive I'm not I'm dead clearly Well I mean How are you able to talk and think

For yourself Oh It leads to myself You're not an author you know Shut up I can be whatever I want I'm dead My lot in life It is all of our lot in life

and soon it will be gullubs as well. Oh, yes. I hear that there's a coup happening. Oh. Oh, do you? Yes, someone was walking shortly, shortly after that strange little scarecrow thing came this way, and there was something about an illig. Oh, a coo.

You all love a coo. Yes, I do love a coo. Illig, you say? See the bear in a muck stump? Oh, yes. that would be him. Seems like a pretty bad dude. You know where he lives or hangs out at?

King Crokington the 14th at your service. Oh, we'll murder him in his sleep. I've already been murdered, good sir. How did it feel? In it happened so quickly, I... Did you all... Did you like... I don't quite remember.

Did you get guillotined? Or is this more of a... Not quite as on the nose, omas to the French Revolution. I was standing looking, I was standing on the second floor of the castle looking out over my domain

and I felt a knife twist in my back. Oh. Oh, and you deserved it too, you little shit. I only reigned for a day after before I then met my end. Were you the one who twisted the knife? Of course I was.

So you... I should have been queen. So who... Stab you in the back. Oh, he's over there sleeping. Oh, so you sort of kill the shelter. You hear off to the end. Ribbit, ribit, ribit, ribit, ribit, ribit, ribet, ribet, ribet. Well, I'm just a deserts to know, I guess.

Man, this is all kinds of fucked up. Yeah, what is? What is, Grigold always says? This is kind of macabre. It's a little macabrein from all that, Chase, if you asked me. Absolutely. Well, this is just how it is. Hey, guys?

Yes. Yeah. Are they talking? talking about our friend, Clapper claw. Oh, yeah, Clapper claw. But no, there's a cooper foot.

Oh, yes. Apparently there's a cooper foot. Yeah, cooper foot. Yes. Also a coo. Illeg. No, it's pronounced coop. There's a pee in it.

I do know that. And there's also a cupal foot? Like a turtle soup sort of deal? Like the feet of turtles? Is that we talking about? No, it's a coop. Like a political... That sounds like a delicious dish.

But I can't eat. I'm dead. The P is silent. It's pronounced coup. What? Yes. It's also pronounced macab. Let's just get it out there.

I mean, you ignored it for like eight years. It's not called... It's not pronounced Mac. It ends with an R and an eight years. Yeah, but it's sort of, you know, it's sort of that, that Agway dialect. You pronounce it macab. I corrected you the first time, and then I just stopped correcting you. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, you know, this... That was one of my favorite words. No helping some people. Well, you can keep saying macabre, and we won't correct you. Oh, my Coddard sounds so stupid. Various deadheads. Do you know who currently rules and what you mean by coup? What is the...

What is the news of the... Oh, yes. King Gullop the 19th is the current ruler. And apparently this illig fellows planning on ending his reign. Okay. Well, hang on. I mean, it sounds like the rain's always ended by the person. Well, oh, Hems makes it very difficult to do anything with notes. Take your time. I'm blown away that you're able to produce sound given that you have no one.

While she's looking, Clappercloth, why did they come through here? Are we following them? Are they okay? Oh, I sound to my notes. What do they have with royalty? You, you, I think you, uh, you see the figure of what you imagined to be Clapper Claus. shrouded in fog about halfway, maybe three quarters of the way across the bridge. Their feet are dangling over the side of the bridge. Their head hung low as they look somberly off into the distance, facing the heads, facing north.

Well, that serendipous. Perhaps we should approach. Has he always been there? Oh. Yes. There was a... In the initial description, there were someone with their legs dangling that we could have approached it at any point, but we started talking to these... I'm imagining... We saw somebody sand in there, and then all these cut-off heads of Bullywugs started shouting and screaming.

They're indeed very distracting. It was pretty fucking unscadowing. Do you all have like souls, or is this like... Is it you or is it like an echo? Is it like you there? Is it like... Well, it's been my head for as long as I've had one. I think what he's trying to say is that this seems like an eternity of torment,

and would you like the sweet release of oblivion? Oh, if, oh, yeah. We could have Gideon here crush you like a pumpkin. I think he was just asking the age-old question. What does it mean to be Bullywood? Yeah, yeah, yeah, basically. From what I am. Prince Totington.

Yes, that was his name, sure, yes, it was. Prince Todington was knocked off of his stick and he's still talking at the bottom of the lake. Well, but was he crushed into the pumpkin by totally destroyed? My big strong man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but I would prefer a fate of this

than to become pumpkin stew. It's like bootstrap bill. You're giving it a try, so. Yeah. How do you know its preference? Don't knock it till you try it. Yeah. Well, I have no hands.

Can't stop you. but please don't do you we got we got a good we got a bit more of acid we can probably find out oh no do you still feel do you get if I touched your face would you have a sensation why didn't you try kitty tats oh no no no just one moment just one no no no I'm not gonna touch I'm gonna reach out with my mind it's not worthy a in phantom hand poax the cheek of the one I'm speaking it's for science oh it's been so long since I've been touched I'm man.

Not the vet of acid, that sounds like a nightmare. They can feel everything. They can feel like a little. Not even Dormack is that. Yeah. Hey, who's a line to take over for like Philip

Guppington or whoever the current kill? Well, of the 19th. Well, obviously whoever dethrones him, so it would be illeg would become king. Oh. It's not like a lineage or whatever. It's just whoever kills them.

Keep what you kill, you know? The right of conquest, mentioned. So they have a very similar ruling structure to the Herringdon, it seems. That may be in our best interest based on communications. You are such a sweet boy. Oh, thank you.

Do you want another cheek poke? I would love one. You're welcome. You use lotion, don't you? Now it's not the time to lose one's head. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You lotion your mind? That was tasty.

What's that? That was tasteless. Oh, yes. Well, if you can give us more information that might help us understand the gazebo's to come. What would you like to know? It's as free as a cheek poke.

How long has Bavlona Blatstrel been in charge for real? I'm not sure I'd really say she's in charge. The king's clearly in charge. Bavlona lives in the hut. above. I'm sorry, I don't have any hands or she uses her tongue. Um, oh, a fly.

Um, yes. Um, but she is, she doesn't come down often. She's distrustful. A shut in. She loathes her sisters, especially scabbatha. I think she really only lives here because of the pool in her house. You know the one I'm speaking of. one she likes to bathe in all the time. Oh, she's well off enough to have a pool?

It's burned into my mind. In this economy. That's cool. I was that a big deal. I mean, with inflation being what it is. I'm a heating bill on that thing, man. How does a hag manage that? Isn't like a swamp water pool?

Oh, I haven't seen it to myself. Just ahead, after all. Is that why her stationery was sopping wet? Well, if you've seen received a letter from her, I would be shocked if it weren't, yes. She's always quite moist. Do you look, I know she has

the ear of the king, but do people like go to her for like favors? Oh, all the time. Oh, God. Oh, God. I don't think it all, I don't think it turns out well for them. Isn't like a witch is always like,

oh, I want to go make a deal with a witch. I have to say, it's very similar to that, yes. She, you can go to her if you have a problem and she'll fix it, but she always wants something in return. And if you can't pay up, well, then you're screwed. And even if you can pay up, you're more than likely screwed anyway. Oh.

I wouldn't recommend it. Doesn't sound like a way to get ahead in life. No, that's simply the reason that Sir Tel Avar needed help from the soggy court to escape. Oh, what did Sir Talavol get mixed up in? Oh, he was captured by He was captured by Bavlona Why? Oh, I don't rightfully know

Something to do with the Queen of the Summer Court Yeah, we know why, and we don't know why We don't know what the fuck you're talking about This is all new information But a little fly told me that he had been instructed To make a deal with Bavlona And he refused

He was far too loyal to the Summer Queen and word passed among the soggy court and there were those that felt like maybe the alliances here were a little shaky in that Bevelona couldn't be trusted and thus neither could the ruling member of the soggy court and so strangely enough two of our most loyal knights helped him to escape

one of them you know is locked away in jail right now waiting trial by combat. Oh yes, we did see that. And it's such a shame, too, Morgau. Morgo? Yes. The former Knight of Warts, she was the best

at flying those balloon contraptions. Very skilled in their repair and their navigation. What if she wins this trial by combat? And loyal, too. What if she wins the trial by combat, then she won't die terribly. If she had been here during my reign,

I would have made her my right-hand night, and I never would have fallen as I did. Hmm. Well, we need to make sure she doesn't fall because we owe her a blood debt of sorts. Her best friend escaped with Sir Tel Avile. Oh, what was this name? Do we have to ask every time?

Every fucking person we meet, I gotta take my hat off. Oh, it's a quick walk or something of the sort. Oh, I have my 90s hat. They were the best of friends. Attached at the hip. They were tadpoles together, you see. I'm sure wherever he is, it's very respectful. No, I'm not, he's fine.

He's fine. No, they never said it. I do believe that they were a love match. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I'm sure he's, I'm sure he's just, you know, he's living. Yes, you know that Morgow is only in chains as we see. speak because she sacrificed herself to make sure he escaped and could live on. No.

I'm sure he's living on, and every single day he lights a candle in the window of a lovely cottage by the sea for the one day that she will return. I just keep talking. I'm sorry. I can't stop it. Someone stop me. It's been lovely. It's been lovely.

Well, it's been lovely, too. Thank you, and I'll give her one to you. Oh, oh, oh, oh, Jesus. Yes. Do you make an old frog feel young? Torvang's gonna be sane. So bad of acid, or no? No, no, no, no, no.

No, thank you, child. All right, we gotta do. It's been lovely. Oh, look at you. You're an alligator. You like snoodle, I believe. Goodbye. Frosty's touch will probably keep her going

for another hundred years or so. Oh, I saw, I saw it. the stage play who framed Regina Rabbit as a child and the acid scene really stuck with me. I'd rather not recreate it here. It was a strange time when that movie was made. I mean, major image. And stage play. Oh, yeah, maybe it was anyways.

Goodbye. Thank you very much for the pleasant conversation. Oh, clap. Bye. You guys were acting really weird about that Talibar guy. What happened? He's surely fine, right? We'll tell you once we're

across this bridge and out of the many ears that are around here. All right. He's fine. He's fun. Torbeck believes you. Talibar is fine. Palis far is totally fine.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Claverclaw. Hey, buddy. Did you find your head here? I can't even remember how to do voice. Wow. I know, I know, but I just can't. You have a skeleton phrase at least,

a couple of them. You know. Yeah, that's it. You know. You know, I haven't been able to find my head. Did you find at the top of the stump? No, we look, too. That's really a shame because this one has those coins and it. Then every time I go like this, it goes clink, clink, clink, clink, clink.

And then I can't sleep. Coins you say, what kind of coins? I don't know. I didn't put them in there. Are they, like, in the middle of the gourd? Is they, like, we have to cut them out? You're not going to cut into my head. No, no, no, I'm just wondering if, like, this is something. If you can just sort of not do that, I got to just help you out, get them out of there.

You know, I would just really like my head back. Well, we did look, and we didn't see it. It wasn't up there. No, we actually found, you found a bunch of spit, but somebody found a logbook, right? some kind of logbook. Oh, yeah. I gave it to Twigs. I'll give it to Twig. And we found that the head was in here, wasn't it?

It's right. Yes. We are aware that Babylon has your head. Well, I'm not going to go up there to get it, so. We will get it for you as thanks for giving us your boon. I have never

been booned on so nicely before. So thank you for your boonage. You're really welcome. I will boon you any time you'd like as long as they bring my head back. Yeah, no. And I would also be willing to take you to

thither if that's where you wanted to go next. We would gladly give you head in exchange for booning. A thorough booning, please. Well, if you give me head, I will boon you as hard as I possibly can. Oh, thank you. Clapper Glaw, you are a wonderful scarecrow.

I'm out. So, I mean, is there anything we... Is there anything else we can do for you while you're here? I mean, you're just hanging out. Well, we'll get your head. We got a lot of business to attend, too, though. Well, because I don't have a head of my own. I like to hang out with these heads on sticks.

Well, then one of these heads informed us that there was possibly a still alive head down in the water. I don't know if you can swim or go in the water. If I go into the water, I get water logged. and then I have a hard time getting back up to the surface because my gourd feels with water and then I stay down there. Oh, don't do that. I was going to ask. Last time I had to have this scallab dur carrying me back up,

but what did he's not there? Oh, Rocky. Yeah. Rocky's not there. He's asleep. Well, it's probably fine that there's a head down there that's still conscious, awake, and in its own nightmare mind prison.

I'm sure it's fine. I mean, to be fair, there are a few empty places. I don't think it's the only one. Oh, perhaps they can keep each other a company. That's what Frasjee's imagining right now. Well, is there anything we can do while we're here? Or any news? I right click on about what.

Okay, I'm just sitting here waiting for my heads to come back. Okay, we'll get that for you. I do have a skiff hanging out around here, hidden in the ridge. So if you come back to me and we need to get on the skiff, then we can do that. You'll be all skim. We can skiff to our skiff and then I'll skiff out of here.

All right. I hope the king is okay. I propose that we don't go to the gazebo and we look for the skiff. We've been bored to it. Anyway, we really got to get on with this bloody revolution of highest or whatever this is. Well, it was really nice to see you again, though.

I'm a little bit disappointed that he didn't have my head. Oh. I mean, we're one step closer. Closing in all. But you know, the good thing is, at least I'm not a lost child soul in Gehenna. Mm-hmm. Oh, you're a child? Oh.

Yeah, you didn't remember that? No, I didn't. Oh, that's very important. Oh, good. Check, please. I just want you, just a little skil, a little fellow. You know, a little fellow. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. So anyways. Back drowning frog, yeah, we should probably go fetching. Oh, yeah, we're gonna fish him out of the drink. We'll fish him out. Goodbye, glabaglo. Jabba Joe.

It was good to see you. I will see you later. Stay safe. Oh, I can't wait to see him. King. We continue to cross the bridge on the northern side. Go to the gaze. Also, did I find the embers?

You're so stupid. I know, I'm going to hear. You pass Clapper Clause, you make your way across the bridge. All of the heads continue to chatter at you and shout things out, exclaiming about the ways that they were killed, yelling at the person who dethroned them, claiming that they were the greatest ruler of the soggy court. But a consistent thread is that there is a coup afoot

and that King Gullough better watches back or his will be the next head upon a stick. As you make your way towards the gazebo, a grand marble gazebo stands atop a top a mound of soggy earth. Its white stone streaked green with algae. The support pillars have sunk into the muck unevenly so that the domed canopy now sits askew. Short steps ring the gazebo, leading to a raised floor where bully bugs, dressed in Rococo dress, lounge on pillars. Among them, a harpist sends

forth delicate notes that mingle with the murmured croaking of the gathered nobles. On a dais, a flabby bullywag wearing a crown of woven lily flowers sits on an ornate throne with his legs folded under him. He has a large leather book bound open across his lap and is mouthing the world. And is mouthing the words he reads on the pages without looking up. Without looking up, he says, Have you no herald to announce your presence before King Gallup the 19th? He slams the book closed as if to punctuate his question regarding you for the first time. Sleepy Bullywug guards standing around their monarchs snap to attention and ready their weapons.

A Bullywag in Jester's attire sits up looking confused as he makes miming motions and then makes a motion of slitting his throat and fake dying against the steps. The king chuckles a little bit as he reaches down and pets a small alligator that sits next to him. Oh, snoodle, we have guests,

and that's where we'll end the session. No! We walked 10 feet. That's not true. We crossed a bridge. We walked 35 feet. We did way better. You can do that in a turn.

Oh, man, I love this. Welcome back to Rebecca. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Aventra's podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin Tier or higher to unlock Shroud of Her Salt Marsh,

a patron exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com forward slash Legends of Aventrous. If you want to chat about the episode with the avatrous community, join us on Discord at Legends ofavantris.com forward slash Discord. We also post content nearly every day on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, so make sure you follow our socials at Legendsofaventris.com forward slash social. And make sure you check out The Crooked Moon

so you can terrify your friends with a folk horror 5E supplement published by us. Get your own copy at the crooked moon.com. Thanks again, and we'll see you next time.