Legends of Avantris - Once Upon a Witchlight | Ep. 28 | A Comedy of Errors

Episode Date: July 4, 2024

In a bid to free an imprisoned knight, Gideon and Chuckles battle in the arena...   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/KwsQPBeFJtU?si=XEh_LIdXbOFKJehH

Hello everyone, welcome to Legends of Adventress. I'm Grico Grim Grim, and you're listening to Once Upon a Witchline. Here's what happened last time. Hi, Ness, I'm not really sure why we're here, but I guess we're going to have a nice, like, cooking contests to death. That sounds pretty nice. I'm not sure what's happened to Zabella entirely, but I do know that her presence cannot be felt in this realm any longer.

Silver-gilded writing, Bavlornas Big Book of Bad Blood. This is Bavlona's book. It's where she writes all of her. grudges. I had it stolen, would it be too much to ask my newfound friends to return this book to Bobble and charm and get them to return it to Bavlona? If there needs to be a duel to the death, maybe one of you would volunteer as her challenger. For now, you walked through downfall as the hands of the king. Stop by and talk to Morgow and maybe, perchance, purchase some things, gain some intel from Bobble and charms. And then, I'll just.

You can loop your way back around to the soggy palace. And once there, we'll get you outfitted in your gear to perform an Electrum Chef, and then we'll have some fun in games. You now hold in your possession. A brooch of the king. You do have Bevlorna's big book of bad blood, a clown, someone who has never been here before,

rising from the depths of hell. I go for the pizza. Oh, has entered the chat. What the hell? They're clearly preparing for celebration in a large feast and eventually a lactrum shaft. We need to talk to her,

convince her that we are on her side, convince her that we are going to meet her in the arena, and that we are going to fake her opponent's death. Pretend to five. One of us pretends to die. The jail in front of the proving grounds. There are two guards standing there with their spears crossed in front of you. You hear, I'm not telling you nothing.

You are now members of the Sagi Court. Yeah, yeah. I don't know. You can say that. I would like you all to roll a D-20. Oh no. No. Ripple didn't do anything wrong.

You don't have to. I was cool. I'm doing it. I'll accept my fate. 11. 11. 19. 19.

I'm choosing between the list. Oh, that's smart. Ooh. She's all right. already hating us. She's already telling you nothing, nothing, kids. You will take no step. What did you get, Grammy? 13. Grico. 11. Fine. Okay, cool. We'll resolve those as I see fifth. Okay. You are. You are now knights or members of the soggy court in name only. After your

meeting with King Gallup the 19th, You have discovered a bit more about what it means to be a member of the Sagitport, what the politics are like and who this king really is. There is still one pawn in play, someone that you have yet to meet, the leader of the resistance. But that will have to wait in time, because you've been sent on a mission to deal with Morgow, the former Knight of Warts, who has been imprisoned.

in the jail of the soggy court for crimes against the court in her participation in the escape of the the fairy dragon and I cannot think it is

fucking hot in here. Jesus Christ in her part of the escape of the fairy dragon. Bavlora is not pleased that the fairy dragon has gone missing as he was held captive in her hut or in her cottage. King Gallup believes that Morgow, who had always been an honorable knight, doesn't necessarily deserve the fate that she has been handed. But as the new king,

and with all eyes on him and a coup already in effect, he cannot step in and determine a a more kind fate for her. So he sent you on the mission of speaking with her to see what information you could find and potentially coming up with a solution to the problem. All before you're expected to be at Soggy Castle to participate in an event for the kingdom in hopes that it will raise the spirits of downfall

and thus gain him some favor with the courtiers. All culminating in one grand event that Cremie has been involved, and told to participate in, Electrum Chef. Oh yeah. But for now, you have made your way to the jail. Stepping forward, the guards blocked your path, but upon showing them the king's specific pendant

that he gave you, the brooch that belonged solely to King Gollip the 19th. The guards easily stepped away and no longer hindered your path. as you were able to move forward towards where Margo is held. Rising from the soggy earth is a sturdy wooden hut with an open doorway on one side of it. At the back of the hut are two holding cells. Thick mangrove root serve as bars with a small round door closing off each cell. The floor of one cell is covered with several inches of stinking water.

The other cell holds a figure and rag slumped against the back wall. And as you move forward, the sounds of your footsteps, are not quiet in this open, in this open area. She lifts her head and makes eye contact with you from beneath the brim of a dirty and moldy hood as she looks quickly between all of you and says, I'm not telling you anything. Well, you don't know who we are.

And I'm telling you, I'm not telling you anything. My lips are sealed, there's nothing to say. What if I told you, then we're on the up and up and the, you know, we're pretty hip to the old Bunko game, if you know what I'm saying? Oh, we didn't introduce ourselves correctly. Buh, buh, boop, boop, bop, bop. Oh, are there guards?

There were guards at the entrance, but they stepped to say. It's just you standing in at the top of this platform. There are two cells, one's empty. and partially covered in water, the other one just has more go in it. And she is, she slumped against the wall and she's just barely looking at you from under her hood.

Does it seem like the guards would be in within earshot? No. So we have absolute privacy. They have given you privacy. You showed them the brooch that the king gave you. And they understand that you have a level of authority here that far outranks them. Aside from the invisible chinchilla that's been following us to the entire adventure.

You mean twig? Yeah. Oh, Twit's here too? No, she's hanging out with the scarecrow, clap or clock. Oh, right. So it's just us and the chinchilla. It's just the chinchilla and Marco. Okay.

All right, scurvy introduce yourself. Hey. doing there. D'Orbett Randall doesn't mind. He's been there the whole time, and he's never done that once. I have to come. Someone said, I'm in Maryland and it's

69 degrees. Yes, our AC is broken. And it depends where you're in there is something about this house that generates. Heat rises. We're on the floor. We're on the fourth floor of this house.

Also, there's, generates heat. We are locked in by fleece and blankets that are covering on the windows. We can't do on the walls. We can't do anything. We might have been wrapped inside of a carpet taco. There's sound roofing foam. We might have been wrapped inside of a carpet taco. Lone time is in my pants. I wish I were where you are right now. Where are you? Oh. Oh. Anyway.

Sorry, sorry, Monument. I'm out of this old prison thing. You like Bunker? You like Bunker a lot. She looks, she tilts her head up a little more, and the hood falls back from her face. And you can see that she is a,

she's clearly not been fed much. over her stay here is her eyes have sunken in she looks she looks like she's becoming a bit emaciated she was a small bully wug to begin with but her time here is clearly taking its toll the bags under her eyes are darkened she isn't sleeping very well and yet the hair on top of her head is pulled up into a a loose bun but it is it is very well-kempt and organized and And though she's dirty, everything about her seems to be put together. She spits on the floor towards the entrance to this cage in your direction.

I am no traitor. I am or was a former knight of the soggy court, and I do not dally with those who wish to do harm to my king. She crosses her arms over her chest, and she just stares at you. Can I insight check that? I can't hear you over the fans. Sorry, can I insight check? You're gonna have to scream!

Throw all the fans! Into the mics. Can I insight, check, Morgow? Yes, I would love for you to do that. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Are we the little five yet?

That's also not the way to do that stuff. You met a gaming piece of shit. Yeah, I know, I know, 18. What did that guy? 18. Can I get a sense of if she's truthful? I would say with an 18, it's very easy to tell she's truthful. And you, this mirrors what the king had told you,

that she was an honorable knight of the court, and that whatever had led her to help Sir Talavar and Wigglewag with their escape must have been something very important, because she is one of the few people of the court that he felt like he could truly trust, and is part of the reason that he is feeling so much guilt about the situation she's in. Margot, we like to hear your side of the story.

If you would be so kind to share, I know you just said you wouldn't speak with us, but it's very important that we make things right here. We're trying to do not just what's best for the king and also for the land, and perhaps for you. We can cook two meats with one fire, so to speak, if we all trust one another. You come, as you're saying this, you realize that night has fallen, and it's the perfect time of night for you, a vampire, to exist in this world.

I hate when you say that. As long as there's no garlic involved, I feel like we could get it together amiable. He's very rude. This is actually Grumple the Count of Bogbarra. I'm Baron Splod. I'm Baron Splod. the green baron, the green baron. You can tell by my skin I'm green. Hi. She looks up at you and she just doesn't respond. How do you get mixed up in all this? She especially looks towards you and you can see that she, there is a look of derision on her face. Um, with, uh, she seems to be incredibly offended that you would come to her about Bunko.

well so you know about bunker drop the bunko you don't like it she's not into it doesn't even like it a little bit okay I'm not saying she does

and I never said I did maybe she's assuming that I'm down on the bunco I guess I did say that I was down on the bunko yeah he said I'll read him down on the bunk I think it's just so hot

our brains are scarred maybe where the hell's the brooch man just show her the brooch take a look It's a brooch Of like flip them between my fingers and sort of flash

The brooch that the king gave us And now it's brooch And listen we actually really like the king And we don't even look down on him a little bit For all the public masturbation he does And even some of us I don't want to knock anybody's proclivities Some of us probably even done it ourselves

Torbeck for sure Oh hey First off, Rimmel's name is Rimmel And second of all, it was only a couple times. Yeah, there you go. Rimble, I think it's even worse when that's his name. You get it? And as you say this, you look around at your friends, your party members.

And something doesn't look right about them. One of them is clearly a doppelganger in disguise, and you must determine who they are before they can betray you all. Oh, fuck. We're not making any progress here. Morgo, I'm sorry to do this to you. Hey, have you ever made that look before? What are you doing, Frosty?

Just hold on. I'm in grump. Morggo. It's grotto. Yeah, I've never said all the letters in anybody's name. It's towards you. Are you trying to cast a spell on me? Well played, Morgone.

My terms did not work on her. Oh, no, that's definitely Frosty. Okay, it's somebody else. No. Well, we aid Bunko, and we're trying to free you from your fate by doing a ruse to trick all of the gods and then let you win and kill us. Munder Mud is pretty charming. Why doesn't he take a crack at it?

Good idea. Pretty suspicious. You would say something nice about me. What? Tell me something only Rebel would know. Well, Ribble already got the public masturbation thing out there. Oh, Ribble has a wife named Clementine. Nobody knows about that.

Oh, it's you. Clementine's your girlfriend. I know. I know it. No, it's very serious. and tiny his rebels wife. All right, we're going to have to dive into that later. That is a new information good. That's awful suspicious.

Now you've got me questioning. Maybe they eloped in the five years that, you know. While he's being held captive and tortured by doctors? They're having all that installed. Cranny. As you're saying this, you begin to look around

and the whole world begins to change a little bit. The colors, bright and even, Even more, this is the Fawaiw Island. Everything's enhanced even more until it mirrors that which you've seen in a storybook. You believe you are living in a fairy tale

and everything that happens to you follows a certain narrative structure. Oh, I've seen this one before. What? We have to have some sort of like crazy tournament with her, right? Yes, that's what we've been talking about. I thought it was a thought to the death. That's what the Instagram

story says. I don't know if it was fault. advertising. Oh, yes, I saw that. Well, no, you're crummy mean, you've seen this before. No, this is... It's probably...

It's been to prison before, which is true. You know, it may have not be true. It was alleged. Not to visit to prison. It's not alleged. I mean,

that was real. All the crimes we were accused of were alleged. You know, I'm trying to have to think about those times. Yeah, that's fair. To be fair,

you know, you were, you know, judged guilty by a jury of your peers. anyway look we all know how this good right

you're basically a side character that I encounter to sort of you know throw a challenge in my path and the whole point is I need to show that you know this is my low point now where I have to pretend to be this you know Duke or whatever fuck it is

oh no this is you're not a low point public master's nation is a long yes we really need to get you a robe about that. And I gotta finish my hero's journey by saving your life. You're like that. I'd let you

out of here. The role of persuasion check at disadvantage because you called her a side character. She's a bit more of like an extra. Not bad. The 13.

Nice. Holy shit. That's crazy. Well done. That's huge. of course I would like to get out of here but I'm also a knight I took a vow if it weren't for wiggle walk I wouldn't have done what I did

but a vow of friendship is sometimes more important than a vow of knighthood to a court and disrepair but I do hope that Gullop the 19th can solve some of the issues

we were friends once before he ever had it before I ever became king who's a nice guy the role is going to destroy him but I've done wrong they must pay the price it seems to be a little

I don't know defeatist very it seems your philosophy seems to be a little bit draconian I'm not sure if I'm ever going to see my friend ever again who knows how he's at now what if he's in the summer course What if he's with Titanian? She doesn't like him or understand him. You know what he is in the summer court?

He was such a shy, Bollywuck. He always needed me there. You struggled without me. I tried to teach him the best I could about how to fly those hot airblins. God, I hope he was able to do it. You got all the way up until the break part, huh? What? What? I'm sorry, usually somebody else does the talking. I'm not very good at it.

I get nervous and I'll reveal things. That's exactly what Wiggle Walk was like. Oh, God. When it was just the two of us, he could talk up a storm. We were the best of friends, got in all kinds of adventures. But then the moment someone else was there trying to talk to him, he just climbed up and he couldn't do it.

But he was so smart and so full of, what's the, what's the term, Chauda V. His eyes. Oh, he sounds lovely. When can we meet him? I'm not sure. Sure. You know what?

Hopefully you will. I think you would like him. I can't speak for the rest. He's a little scratchy. No, they're good people. They'll grow on you. I actually think he would connect best with them. Yeah, probably.

For a certain point of you. Well, look, you know what? I think at the end of the day, wherever he is, I think he's always going to I think he's at Tartagnan's side right now as we speak talking up a storm to the queen of the Faye. Well, that's highly unlikely.

Other way, he's on the radio. As you say this, you develop the ability to break the fourth wall. You are now able to start addressing the DM directly.

Fuck you, Derek. It's at this point. So, Angela, I've got to say, I think we've all had enough of more go. I feel like all of us don't really know what to do in this situation. We don't know what she wants. And we'd really like to get on to Electrum Shelf. Do we all hear this? Oh, really?

What's wrong? Who's Angela? Is that the name of the Chinchilla? And why are you talking directly into that wall right now? One, two, three. That's the fourth one. What could spot possibly be addressing? And so I'm just going to say, is there any way you can, you know, give us a little bit of a hint?

I'd like to cash in a hint, you know, clue token, you know. Kindness. Oh, thank you. So we all got to be nice. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to do. Well, and Ribble was nice. What did you just do? Who have you been... How did you get that information?

Frosty was always everyone's least favorite character. Oh, that's the whole thing to stand. But you know who's my best lad? I'm standing right here. Who are your best mate? I'm looking above this day. Is it like... Is it like...

Sikido? What the fuck are you talking about? And, you know, it's, it's, and Torbeck was there. Ribble is always here. He might be able to connect with the king and their shared pension for public masturbation. Can we stop bringing that up? It was never, I guess it was never proved in accord. And a raid is here.

What? What kind of raid? Oh, my God. They're on Twitch. Where, I look at the window. Oh, yeah, because you can't break the first one. There's on Twitch. And there's a whole bunch of people

who are new to our channel. Ripple doesn't understand any of those words in that order. Oh, you are some kind of a witch. I would have a window. Yeah, and so, you know, I would like to personally thank the Raiders for joining in on this Faye Wild Adventure.

You know, if you would like to hit the follow button, we also have a merch of the Patreon. You are all standing here. As Grico is saying these words, these things that mean nothing to you. For context for the Raiders, we have a fairy cursed table that I randomly throw out to them for fun.

And Grickos is that he can now break the fourth wall and speak directly to the DM. And so they're in a situation where all the party members now hear him saying the stuff. So all of you people watching us are now officially part of our case. In our most intimate moments. Give Questlandian, do you follow?

Did good folks. What are you talking about? He's been taking my madness. You've never made less sense, Grigo. You know what he's saying? Look, Wigglewog, I'm sure, was a swell fellow. And you know what? He's out there.

He made it out. And that's what you need to do. You got to focus on being where he is, on the outside, with your friends. And look, you think that King Gullup guy's a swell fella? Well, I think so too. And I'm telling you, if we don't break you out... If you think that he's a swell fellow, then why did you step to myself and speak the words of traitors?

Because I had to make sure that you weren't one of them. The whole reason we want to get you out is so that you can protect it. Are you being truthful? Yeah. Well... Well... Think very carefully my friend. My plus is the same either way, so...

But it's if I... Are you being truthful? Because it determines whether you roll deception or persuasion. I would say I'm attempting to cover up my initial question. Because I wasn't exactly sure on her philosophy on the Bunko game. But I don't think I'm necessarily trying to trick her... It's truthful that it was a test. Yes. Then roll a persuasion check for me, too.

always was a very good liar. He's the only one in the group that has hard charisma. And so he makes a very nice leader of the party when we all decided our loose backstory together that everyone always asked about in YouTube comments, confused that there was no campaign before this. What? It was a circus.

Don't forget, you think you're a vampire. Oh, yes. I'm waiting for my moment. I'm just making sure. Vampire has all the time in the world. A vampire never forget. I meant what? To kill. I mean bleeha, blah.

Blah. Blah. What was it? 23. She seems more receptive to you as she is listening. I'm not giving him. but I did break an oath and there is a price to pay for that.

I'm not saying I want my life to end but I do want to win the trial by combat and I want to take my name, my rightful name Morgow, no longer former but current knight of warts and I want to protect my king. Well, uh,

I think we can make that happen. We can plan. and if you could get on board with just one more deception, you can win, and you don't have to kill nobody. All it will take is just a little bit of your blood. What? No, that's not having to be what? No, no, no, no. I mean, you might get hurt so that it looks reasonable,

but you don't need blood. Frosty's acting out of character because he rolled a vampire falsehood on the fake... No, no, no, no, no, no. That's not... What are you saying? I'm sorry, a vampire falsehood on a fey table? Yes, yes. What's a role?

Mimicking the great vampires, such as Dracula. Who's Dracula? Dracula. Dracula and Nicholas Cage. That's Dracula. And it's a delicious addition to any dinner meal. Isn't Nicholas Cage also in that new, like, vampire? He's Dracula.

He's Dracula. He's Dracula, yeah. It's a little bit. It's modern humor, referencing a film that is currently in the process of coming out or not. I'm not quite sure. A film? Like a sticky substance that gets on you? Frosty, you'll never understand.

I feel like he's got a direct tap into whatever affects us from time to time. Where did that samboyant hat come from? Oh, I got it as a merch from Magfest. It's a wonderful music and gaming festival. In the Washington, D.C. area. in the beginning of January, not the equivalent of January. We've completely lost him. If he could, ignore all the fucking nonsense that they're spewing, all right?

Just try to focus on me, okay? Now, look, can you, if you could accept that, you could be the Lord Commander of the King's God. And you can make sure that nothing happens to King Goh, so that he actually has a reign longer than two fucking days. That is my plan. Once they have found someone to challenge me in a trial by combat, I will win. And I will take up my spot as a free woman and as a loyal knight to my king.

Well, would you believe me if I said that the goblin spouting fucking nonsense is the one that wants to challenge you? has he committed a crime? Well, no, from a certain point of view, we've all committed terrible crimes. What I worry about as I'll listen to the sad exchange is that she doesn't realize that she was written as a cautionary tale against the dangers of oaths of honor and how backwards such philosophies were at the time, the widers of Wizards of the Coast when they wrote this module

and invented her from their brains. She reaches down and picks up swamp water and she hurls it at you. Pucket swamp! And you immediately feel this curse cleansed from you. In this very not thinly veiled analogy to the French River, yeah! All of this is causing rebel distress! Oh, finally, oh, I forgot to take my bananas.

Oh, it's scurvy chichita, no! Can you roll another D40 for me? Two. Cremie, see if you can negotiate a few ounces of her blood and all of this. Otherwise, I'll be forced to turn you into one of my thralls. Oh, I missed the opportunity. I'm going to rewind and say, man, that's a great reference to the television series, King of the Hill. And as the pocket swamp hits your face,

you realize that you have been having these horrible hallucinations of a world devoid of magic and color. As you come to in Grico's body, but with a voice in the back of your mind, a voice from the depths of hell, a voice you know all too well. And just as you feel yourself coming to, that voice pulls you down deeper into your mind and takes its rightful place as the commander of Grico's body.

Chuckles rises again. Oh, no. It's two. Two is clouds. We all know two is clouds. Oh, I'm back so soon. What are we doing, fellas? Oh, the swamp water.

Why did you do that? Do you know what you've done? He was speaking gibberish. I just, I thought maybe sometimes, you know, when you startled someone, it gets rid of the hiccups. And so I thought maybe it would get rid of his brain hiccups. We're going to miss the nonsense. Swamp water, swamp water.

I got to write that down and activating, you know, when it happened so recently, I thought that we need to let it, you know, pause a little bit. But great, what are we doing, fella? The interrogating is frog. If you need someone to torture, I'm very good at that. No, we're on the brink of it. negotiating a deal to allow her to live with honor and free her from this jail

ch-chukl. Well, honor is the currency traded by fools. And I should know I'm the king of fools. Say, you wouldn't have any blood on you, would you tell you? Oh. Well, I can see. Why don't you give it a little puncture? Oh, don't mind if I do. Horrible, dry, desiccated, like dusty, Undead clack slash. It's actually Grico's body. You're just inhabiting it. Oh, don't really transform a little bit?

You do, but it's still Grico's body. So though that's what it may look like, it is actual blood. And you can, you can feel the warmth. Of the life. Ribble is completely just freaked out. A lot of screaming. You watch as Frost's face is completely

cake and coated. Oh, I didn't know. do that? Well, you know, if it does happen to be demonic clown, Icor, you may experience some changes to your body, but we'll have that conversation when you're a little older. I'm sorry, I had to feed. Goblin blood is not particularly to my taste, but it's, we'll satiate me for now. I'm sorry to tell you this, but my name is not Frost. It's Grompler. Are you doing a Dracula name generator?

Sorf. To sorf. To sorf. To sorf. Is it a posthousy in the air? Is that the best you could do? It's like Alicard. It's frost backwards.

You know, given your pension for breakfast, I would have thought you would have just that count Chalkula. Shit. What a missed opportunity. I hiss and fly away. He just comes out the tape. I'm holding my cape. Man, sorry you had to see that.

This fella's really cringe. To sort of exits the building and seeks additional victim. We hear the screams of the guards. The other room. Did they look expendable? Kind of. Hey, friends. I cast friends on them and we start having a conversation.

Okay, how does that work? We're gonna cut scene and we're gonna go to us. Well, a, uh, uh, Frost walks up covered in blood and puts his arms around both guards. Like so, and just like, hello, how's it going? Excuse me? Yeah, and that's a disposable guard number one here. Why are you covered in blood?

It doesn't matter to you. to you. If you could just as a good friend, present your neck to me. I was a very good friend. What are you doing? What are you doing to Carl? Carl's just fun.

Don't worry about Carl. You're right. I'm not worried about Carl. Carl looks fine. Republic credits will be fine. So Frost kills two innocent guards and brings them of their blood. And in the meantime, the four of you,

Oh, I'm sure that'll be fine. Oh, is it kind of like, was that my fault? Did it kind of like Pringle that once you pop, you just can't stop? Did I break the feel, so to speak? This prison's really starting to feel like prison. Someone playing a fucking... Oh, hey, Gideon, shake my hand.

I didn't have to shake your hand. No, I'll touch you. Oh, God. Come on, you owe me. You sort of killed me. You manslaughtered me in lukewarm blood. Ah! Damn!

I hate you! How long I've been waiting to do that. You are just the worst clown. Oh, gosh, I'm glad that I have the body of Grico as a hostage, so to speak. So you can't really turn your arms of your might or magic against me. The joke is on you, clown. I've killed Grico three times one canonically, okay? And on camera.

Oh, well, I don't think you have the spell that breaks the fourth wall, so it's a little improper if you'd even suggest that. You're right. I'm sorry. I have multiple times punched and need Grico to the point of death, So you have an M is like the most expendable of our party. Well, I hope you say that to him to his faith. It's very hurtful.

You're quite a bad friend. No, it doesn't take things like that very well. He gets really emotional. I might cry. Man, those guards really aren't struggling at all. I mean, oh. Oh, do you hear the cracking? Oh, man, Frost is really going to town.

So here's the thing. Just because he's, get Bricko doesn't mean you can't punch him, right? I just don't like kill. Yeah. You can still punch me in the body. Oh, I care. I feel good about this. Yeah, either way.

Yeah. You know, a little, little round two. What do you think? Oh. Do you want to do that, Gideon? Do I want to do it? Oh, yeah.

I dare you. No. I don't. I double dog, dare you, motherfucker. I'd punch him. I'd punch him. As hard as I can. I'm going to, I'm going to attempt.

I'm going to attempt. I'm going to attempt. to literally, with my sticky squeakers, just complete Matrix back and just bedding over backwards like a cartoon character to dodge him. I don't know if Chuckles has any, like, crazy demonic clown powers, but... You can't miss.

I will twist of dread that. Oh, all right. So you can roll it again. Roll it again. What? I want you to hit Crows. So I'm dreading it. I'll roll my...

23. Well, luckily, I cast. Shield. Does Gricko have shield? Oh shit. Oh, my God. You attempt to and then... Oh!

My clamble in covering. Oh, look up! Okay, yeah. Hold for damage. Let me get Gricko's character sheet up. Nine points of punch and damage. And I peeped a bunch of I peeped up a bunch of colorful circus peanuts

that just praise you. Oh. Islamy. Oh, man. I haven't felt anything like that in so long. Since the last time. Oh, since the last time. Well, no, I was in a bit of a stupor,

thanks to the whiskey sour. I thought you smelled a little funny. All of this madness is happening in the inside. You are, you are now crouched down in the muck of the swamp. You're covered in the blood of three people, your best friend, Grico, and the two guards, Carl and Unnamed guard number two. Unnamed guard number two, no.

Their bodies are slowly sinking into the mire of the swamp. And you imagine that given a certain amount of time, their bodies will disappear forever. and no one will have noticed that they had ever lived. Sing now, take now, take now, take now, take now. As you listen to the sounds of the swamp with your perceived heightened senses,

and you hear a sploishing sound. I look for the splush. Roll of perception check. Oh, that's a D30, I will not be rolling. You made a critical miscalculation. You're supposed to puncture the bodies a few times before you throw them. I already punctured them once, I figured.

More, more, they float otherwise. Hmm, perception, let's go with a 12. You definitely know what direction this is coming in. It sounds like feet stepping into the muck, and then the suction sound as they pull themselves out of the liquid, stuff. It's 88 degrees me, I'm done.

Based on the sounds of that liquid stuff, they're going to be hearing in a minute to source as bitter as apparate. And you look at yourself, you are clearly invisible now. You're missed in the swamp. As you look forward, you hear the sound getting closer and closer. You hone your eyes in.

waiting for the silhouette to appear before you eventually hear immediately behind you Frost what are you doing? Twig! Yeah? How can you see me? What do you mean? You're staying right there. I'm missed. Why are you covered in blood?

I missed you too, man. Yeah, it's good that you're here. All the, this is other people's blood, it's not my blood. Is you getting a fight? Wait, do you have a... You look like a man on the edge! Go ahead! Okay.

What? And she reaches into her acorn bag, and she pulls out, which was probably a tablecloth from one of the tables, but in her hand in the size looks like a napkin of some sort, and she starts to dab the blood off of your body. Oh, thank you. I'll clean you up. I'm not sure how you were able to see me.

I thought I... Where's everybody else? Are they dead? No, no, they're talking to Morgo inside of the prison. Who's Morgau? Oh, Morgo is very. the former Knight of Warts. She's been wrongly imprisoned and we're endeavoring to negotiate for her escape and also

some of her blood. Do you think she knows where I can get a supply of specific type of frog, maybe, being the Knight of Warts? Why would you be interested in frogs? You know, for licking purposes. Hmm. You know, insects and other critters are very adjacent to frogs.

Would you be interested in perhaps consuming them and being my servant forever? Um, yeah, actually, kind of deba both. Okay, I think we have a deal. You have very little blood, so this is a perfect relationship. I do have very little blood. I cut myself once, I'm not even getting a scab or anything.

Okay, you cannot reveal our secret to anyone. It's just you and me. Countsorff and twig. That's... Great. Wait, why are you calling yourself Count Swarf? Oh, well, that's our secret. Most people will call me Count Grumple, but in reality, I'm a...

Wait, hold on. Why would most people call you Count Grumple? Because that's what the king renamed me when he gave me... You had the table! Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. You got a cool king name? In a county, I have a whole county to my name. How could I wasn't there?

You were talking to the pumpkin-headed chip. Damn it. It's all right. You're my servant. You can run the county. You're going to be the right hand of Count Thorf. Can I have a cool servant name then? Wigfield. Okay.

Thank you. That's like twig of the field. I like it. Twigfield. All right, but don't tell anybody this. Very important. Why do I help me? Because that makes it even cooler that it's our secret. Oh. Now, do you have a

a log or something heavy. Maybe, roll up you 100. Our first task is to get rid of these bodies. 54. My first order of business. No, I don't have a log. I have this cool candle that can never be lit. Oh.

Neat. Yeah, I guess I'll keep it on my sill and look out into the night gloomily for centuries on end. Okay. Did I just take... Twixfield disappoint. Count. Sorf. Sorf.

Sorf. Sorf. It should strike fear in the hearts of those who hear it. It's for me? No, no, no. You're my servant. You just always do my bidding and you eat insects. Okay.

And you help me hide these bodies. Once there... Wait! Where'd those bodies come from? It's not important. Servants, now go. And as this is happening, you guys are in front of Morgau. I like to... with the crusher feet, I'd like to punch chumbles with an upper cut to the body five feet up into the air and have him...

and I will fly up and I'll float down like a balloon with the air let out of. Like a, yeah, I'll, and there will literally be flying canaries and stars circling around my head. I know Karami said that the peanuts were slimy, but it's way to wonder to me if they're dry. Like, they're literally just circus people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's just, yeah. Oh, the first one's free, Gibby. Why don't you guys like rumble outside,

you know, have like fist of cups? Well, if I have fisticuffs with him, he's gonna die. I can't kill Ricko. You know what's funny, Gideon? And I blow my hands up really huge. That's exactly what's what bitch with fag. Okay.

I didn't want to do it. I was gonna spare Grigel this time. But I don't care that you're riding his body, okay? When you're right outside, I'll bury you in the swamp. You goddamn, bam! On this cannon, we do something. No ribble, I need you to go out there and supervise. Make sure nobody dies.

Okay! And Toribet will chase after the two of them. Outside to, like, make sure nobody dies. Which, there are two outsides. Wherever they're going. There is the way that you came, which is the way Frost went. But this place doesn't have doors in the same way that other places would. And you can see that directly behind this, there is the circular proving grounds where the battles to the death take place.

Yes, the arena. I'm clouded by rage. I mean the arena. I'll be drawn naturally to the arena. You decide in this moment, you will have your revenge on the this clown, this clown that has haunted you through the entirety of the carnival, and continues to take hold of your friend Grico's body,

forcing you, forcing your hand to harm someone you care about because of his mere existence. More importantly, he shocked my hand with a stupid toy. I caught a wheel out of the room with my chair. And each time my foot lands as it squeaks. It's like, it's like, it's great, it's great, And you make your way towards the proving grounds. A mangrove tree stands in the middle of a patch of heavily churned mud,

where rusting and rotting bits of armor and weapons are scattered. Two lengths of chain are anchored to opposite sides of the tree truck, each with an iron shackle on the end. But you're not prisoners. You have no need of those shackles yet. As you find yourselves in the middle of this circular proving ground, There are rusted pieces of armor and weapons all over. Looking at these, Gideon, this is fodder for the fight should you need it.

As you and Chuckles stand face to face for the first time in life and death, able to truly fight. Hey, everybody, Chuckled here. It's time for an ad read. This podcast is brought to you by our very own Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon. slash Legends of Adventure and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon-inclusive campaign set on the high feed, shroud over Saltmarsh.

You can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement. The Crooked Moon, a folk horror's home for Dungeons and Dragons fifth edition. And don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice, miniatures, plushies, a tarot deck, and more. Thank you so much. We'll see you around. Now, this is important. You hear what he said to me? He called me a bitch. Yeah, I've done like he didn't hear it. But this is serious. It's still Grico. Well, listen, I'll just hit him so hard. He just dies kind of. And then we'll revive him a little bit.

Think this through. Hey, Gideon can be the bigger person. I'm literally the bigger person from him. I don't see what you're trying to get me to I'm gonna slap him so hard. The chalk's gonna come around off his goddamn stupid clown face. I'm gonna get Bricko back when we're gonna matter. He's coming back in the next 12 seconds. That's how many rounds it's gonna take. For the purpose of this,

because Chuckles doesn't really have a stat block in this campaign. I can use Griggas. No, I don't know. I think it will be much more fun if Chuckles can do Chuckles themed things. And so. Well, we have the other one.

We have a Chuggles. Yeah, no. I want to do it this blank, and I'm the DM. How this will work is we will roll for initiative. One of you will obviously go first. That person will say what they're going to do using the arena and things that would be in character to their, even if it's not something on your spell sheet.

It can just be like, I'm going to take this armor, I'm going to charge it up with blame, and I'm going to do this crazy stuff. Cool. You will roll a D20 contest. Whoever wins that D20, if Chuckles wins it, it missed. If you win it, it hits. Does that make sense?

Sure. Yeah. And then that way Chuckles can do weird, like, balloon clown disproportionate body things. Yeah? Fine by me. So it's a battle of the D20s. Fine by me. You square up. Torbeck, Ripple. He's standing there at Kremi's discretion, guarding his friends, unsure of what to do.

what to do in this moment as the two of you stand opposite each other in this circular arena. Gideon, you stare down at Chuckles' body, the body of this desiccated, dead clown thing. And you know that somewhere in there is Grico, your friend. But in this moment, all you can see is Chuckles. Chuckles. You stare at your arch nemesis, Gideon. This is the man that punched you so hard in the body that you went to have. I will.

And chuckles? There really is no wine in hell. I will never forgive that flight. As I fit, Kurt Wheeling out, and I'll do a little a few figure eights. Also then stand and I'll write myself and my hips will get, my legs will like blow out like a cowboy. And suddenly like this like goofy like toy

Raygun will appear on my, on my hip, and it'll be, and it's out of nowhere, you'll hear, and it's also, it's by, it's just clown horns. And I'll, I'll have my, my hands are still giant as I'm just holding it. Okay, Gideon, how is it going to end? These are Mortal Kombat entrances. Yeah. I square off against him, uh, walk up, me know, face to face and I, I'm going to start to come to life. The fire starts to tick up around me, only for it to then just cut back because I'm out of resources.

Your resources don't matter for the sake of this. I am igniting the flame. Would you say that you get a little heated? Oh, yeah, because it's hot in here. Oh, it's hot in here. And may you both roll for initiative. Do I get, do I use Grico? initiative or what?

Use Chuckles initiative. Oh. Do we, sure are we using... You're using your actual initiative, but then going forward, we're not using any of your stuff. This is just going to be a fun... Oh, I say, fuck. Improvisation.

15. He goes... You swear up, and you are so excited to finally take down Chuckles for hopefully the final time. But Chuckle surprises you is he pulls out a ray gun. A gun?

What's a gun in a ventras? Hey, what's that? He's fast. He has the fastest finger in the west. Hey, Gideon. Yeah. I was walking from the carnival to the farm and out from the bush.

Three pigs jumped me and devoured my flesh. That's a pretty good story so far. Keep going. with a ham bush. And I pulled a chicken. And that is where we will break out. Oh,

my. You now stand alone. Sorry, Garrett. You now stand alone in the cell, or in the jail, staring into the cell where Morgau is

leaning up against the wall. And she looks completely flappergast. Everything that's happened here, she has seen many things in her time in the Fay Wild, but nothing compares to whatever the hell this has been for this past period of time. You can hear the sounds of Frost speaking out into the ether, unsure of what he's saying or who he could possibly be talking to.

And you can now hear the sounds of combat ensue, and you can only hope that your pal Torbeck, can keep the clown and the Janossian check for long enough for you to get out of this situation. But for this moment, there is some peace and quiet. And as your emotions calm down, you feel that faker sleepy. You find that you are truly cremmy again. Is there a chair in here? Yes.

I'll drag the chair out. I'll take my jacket off. does that like scratchy thing. That was my best, uh, scratchy chair noise. I'll spin it around and I'll sit on that sort of backwards and I'll sort of have my arms. So look more go. I'm gonna officially apologize for whatever the fuck all that was. Um, but I feel like we were getting somebody. Understand, I feel like we understand each other. Regardless of the madness, regardless of all the goofy bullshit, I think you get what I'm saying.

can be one hell of a place. I've seen my fair share of fair shenanigans. Nothing quite like this. Oh, yeah. But your friend was hacking quite a lot of witchlight. Yeah, sometimes we get hit with like a cloud of drugs in the air or something. I think it's unique to us somehow. I don't know, feed or some other kind of fairytale bullshit.

I think regardless, that's all outside now. Now it's just you and me. I can get you out of that cell. I can get you in a position. I've thought of a phenomenal idea if what is happening out in the proving grounds is what I think is happening out in the proven grounds. This is like a plan related to just me sending them outside

because I was sick of listening to him? Yes. Go on. You said that that thing that took over your friend, his body changed, the entity that he became. Yeah, he's an undead. He was punished for something, a criminal? I mean, he was sort of just a...

In loose terms? Yeah, he was sort of just a gross fella. You know, it's really unclear, actually. How many backstores can one clap? I don't have to fight for myself in the trial by combat. If I had someone willing to stand as my champion. And if this entity is a bad dude, Oh yeah, no, he's a bad dude.

And your friend were willing to fight in my stead with witnesses, obviously as long as they don't kill themselves before the plan comes to fruition, as long as there were witnesses about, maybe the guards out front. If they could see that my champion had bested this cur if he were to win. I would be set free. Wait, so we can just handle it right now. And all you got to do is get the two guards standing right out of front. Yes. And I'll get them as witnesses. And then when Grillo...

And then they can release me from this cage. Well, one quick caveat is that... But make sure you get those two guards, they're the only ones with the magical key that can unlock this cage. Oh, no. All right. I mean, that's a great plan. Wait, well, he's the thing.

This is just the one catch, is that get Kenny X. kill the clown because he's like sort of transmogrified into the clowns and attack to your friend, Bricko. And it may just be because I'm quite smart. Mm-hmm. As long as he doesn't kill the body, he kills the clown within the body. Then he'll turn back to Grico. Then he's still killing the clown, but not killing his friend.

Oh my God. We just need to make sure that we get those guards. He's going to make quirk out of him, so I better go. I'll be right back. Oh, right. I'll be right, yeah. I open the door. You open the door, and what you see is. Twig and I are walking towards the entrance that I initially came out and grabbed the guards up.

Twig is covered in lock. I'm wiping the mud off of myself, and well done, Blakefield. I don't think we could find those bodies. Even if we ourselves went back looking for them. very talented at this. Now remember to keep quiet. Thanks. I really like being your servant master, master. It's my pleasure. It's important that we keep our favorite. Do not mention this to anyone, even our good friends. My lips are sealed. If I had a magical key that could only lock one thing, I would sue my lips with it and throw it away.

Well done. Into the muck, never to be found again. Here comes Cremie. Oh, okay. How much of that do I hear? Hi, Cremie. Hello, Cremie. everything is well how are you

everything's great crimmie home twig I look at twig I look at frost where the gods they seem to have disappeared I came out here and they were gone

yeah they must have had a changing of the guards without actually bringing new guards yes once they stop working they just get up and go I think it's a union thing Oh my god Well if it's a union thing

Wouldn't my buddy be right here And for the fucking second shift Perhaps they're feeling under the weather But those guards, they won't work another minute Unions work different than unions you're probably each two Right? Both of them She winks

She winks very obviously at you Her glasses that Amplify her eyeballs make it very clear. At the same time of day, the same shift. It surprised me as well. I came out here to make sure

that they were protecting the prison. Yeah, and then I showed up. And then Tweed came. And she watched the guards walk away, and we just stood there until you arrived. We decided to get a little money for some reason. I slipped and fell inside. Oh, yes, we slipped and fell.

I see blood all over from all over. Like a beer full. It's Kate. And Matt, do you see bits of flesh stuck to his, to a spur? Look, I know you would lop, like

playing pretend, lopping earlier. Mm-hmm. You know, as a Dracula, whatever. I don't know what that is. I, for some reason, I was compelled to bite Grico's palm, but that's over now. Yeah, but that didn't happen when you beat Grico's palm.

Just fucking tell me that's Clamato juice. It's Clamato juice. Can I perceive? Do you want some Clamato juice? I can get it out of my acorn house. Can I perceive if Twig and Frost are being truthful? Can I attempt to deceive? Of course.

All right, that's very exciting. Twig is also going to, but at disadvantage because she's Twig. 19. Pretty good roll. That's less good roll. 20 Oh I look around in music

Okay Frost fucking living with me Do you kill those dogs No No I did not Why would I do that I'm not a killer Way behind the bodies

There are no bodies They walked out And they They walked away from their shift From their duty Yeah They definitely weren't sticking into the muck and when I showed up,

Sorf told me to go over and start pushing them down into the deep depths of the muck to never be found again. No, no, no. That would be ridiculous. That would be outrageous. You'd even accuse me.

I'm ashamed in you, Grimmie. Did you poke holes in the bodies? She thought of that idea. It was really, right. I mean, no, no, no. No, of course they didn't because that would be something only a cool or a killer would think of.

And neither one of us are like that. Only someone who was really great and talented at hiding bodies would be able to think of something like that. Dad, I'm not. All right, it's fine. It's fine. First, we've got to clean you up, and I'm going to snap my fingers and all the gloves, John.

Okay, next, you've got to take me to the bodies. Those gods have the magical key. It's the only way to get more go out. And then we finally need a fucking witness. It's going down now. Let's just say hypothetically. They walked into the swamp and into some branches that poked holes in them, and then they fell into the water, and then they sank to the bottom of water. I'm not sure we would be able to tell you where they poked themselves.

Look, I'm not trying to trick you, Frost. Look, I'm your friend right now, okay? And it's nothing, you didn't do anything wrong until the jury convicts you and court. Everything's a legend. What you did. Okay. I just need the key. You understand?

We feel, think. We need to, we need to try and remember, where were we just now? We were walking for perhaps one or two minutes. This is so bad. There. Both of them on the ground right there.

Both of them on the ground right there? Yep. You just told me that you sank them to the bottom of some body of water. You're all right. You're all right. I'm going to see if I can go into my mind palace and retrace the steps. Everything was quite blood high at the time, but... I'm going to endeavor to see if I can retrace the path in my mind,

even though I had been actively working to file that away in a... A survival check at disadvantage. I'm going to use the tiniest D20 that I have, and the biggest. Oh, survival? I would like you to roll a D20 for me, please. Oh, it's Rebel. I'll use my new one. Oh.

A Rebel got a 19. Nice. When at least sounds. We're rolling hot in here. 13. You gain one free natural 20. This is Rebel's lucky day! Damn.

You can use it on yourself or someone else. I got a 13. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, 13's more than no. That's a super tour back thing. Give me that. Okay. All the way.

That ugly is really, whatever. Save it for something better. We'll find these fucking bodies. Um, where twigs pointing, looks about right. Oh, okay. Uh, uh, Perhaps this is the right direction. Just, I'm gonna have to get dirty again.

I'm gonna start walking in there. Is this probably gonna take us like 15 minutes or so, maybe even longer? So you know, you're welcome to hang out with us if you want, but- I'm coming with you. Make sure we'll get the fucking key. Y'all just allegedly murdered two dogs,

you understand? Employers of the government. I would say, because you just had the conversation, you remember that if you just have don't get a witness to the event, if they kill each other before a witness is present, the key won't matter. Well, Warren Beck remembered. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I think I found it. This is definitely a body. Oh, wrong body. All right. I don't know who that was. All right, all right, fine, look, my brain's telling me, you guys find the key. Yeah. I'll go find a witness.

You understand? Can I trust you? Yes. You're not going to forget. Yes, yes, yes, yes. No, no, no, no, no, I'm full. I'm full of blood. Just don't tell anyone.

You're counting on you, Grammy. Yeah, and you can't tell anyone that my name is Twinkfield. It's a secret. Why? It's not important. All right, find the key. We'll be right back. Find the key, but we don't need to.

Oh, wait, they're dead. They can't witness anything. Fucking leave the body. Just the key on the body. Sorry, I'm confused. I'm a little blood high. I'll find the key. I'll find the key. You've got to find both bodies. Make sure you find the right fucking key. If I pull every key out, every key in the head.

All of them. One of them of the magic. The body I just found had a key on it. Should I grab that? Yeah, because we can always take it back to jingle jingle. Oh. Even if we can't find it. Here, look. I'm not gonna endorse you looting them from the fucking dead guy, so you do whatever the hell you want.

A lot of do, and I'll turn, and I'll just start, like, looking around to see if I can find anybody that looks either like a guard, a soldier, even like a noble or like Rococo. Roll a perception check. Oh, that's probably pretty good. Perception is 17. look around and there are no guards out and about. But this place is fairly close to the palace of

the Pallas of the Sagi Court. And you eventually spy just off to the edges of the tree line, up against a mangrove, mangrove roots, flitting around these two bodies are lightning bucks. And you see the swirling of a parasol is clearly, two bully wugs are out on a date. And as you walk closer, you hear, I love you so much, honey. You're just the sweetest

little peach I ever saw. Jesus. Perfect. I'm so glad we came out here away from crying. I'll come out and I'll walk up. And I'll sort of like pretend to walk by. been like, why to do that,

Monsieur Mademoiselle? My indecency, don't tell no. Well, you know, I wasn't going to say anything anyway, but now that you mention it, how about a little exchange? I guess. She starts to walk towards you. How about a little frill?

What do you mean? I'm so sorry, Herbert, but if he tells the king of him, I'm not gonna get you. I just wanna spy something first. You have? You know what I'm talking about? Sure.

So I don't have to say it. She gets down on her news. Oh, wait, oh, no, no. We gotta go. It's just for anyone watching, if you've seen House Bunny, it's like the scene with the cop at the beginning. Oh, yeah.

Oh my God. No, no, no, no, I mean, get dressed, and we're gonna go watch a combat to the death. Can that sound fun? What? What about you, fella? You want to come? He's just standing there.

He's got his hat on his chest. There are tears streaming down in his face. Look, I'm awfully sorry about the misunderstanding. I just think it'll be fun if you can watch a guy and punch a clown to death. Doesn't that sound fun? Immediately they both smile and start nodding. Yeah, yeah. You hate clowns too? Let's go.

Come on. And they grab your hands and the three of you skip towards things. though. So yeah, I will turn to a little bit upside down. Oh, oh, my oh, my

so sorry for that fucking guy. That's not going to last if it does. Tag. Look, if you've seen House Bunny, you get it. It's one of the greatest things. Happy 50th anniversary, sweetheart.

I'll try anything to keep the relationship in love. Jesus. We go out of the arena. You have found people to watch the, to watch this fight. And as you're walking back,

I believe I named him Harold, but if I didn't, his name's Harold. No, he was Harold. No, it was Hubert. No, it was Herbert. Herbert. Herbert. His name was Herbert. It's too hot in there.

Herbert. Herbert stops you for a minute. kisses his lady love on the cheek and rushes off on a side path and comes back with five more bully wugs. Oh yeah, tell all your friends. And as you continue to move, they'll randomly run off in a direction and come back with more. By the time you get back to the arena, you have 50 bully wugs in tow, all dressed in various degrees of Rococo garb, all of them clearly members of the soggy court is they begin to fill the stands and you see that it has caught the notice of some of the people that worked here that you didn't even realize were in the back because

I didn't think about it at the time but they're there now because we need circus peanuts and we need hot dogs and we need everything that you would get at something like this and so they're all here. Come with me! All flow! Join me! Come along, any of you government officials? If so, raise your hands! I'm like the pipe-to-piper of Bollywolds. I'm like that Fox from Pinocchio. And within 10 to 15 minutes, the stadium is filled. Torbeck.

You have been outfitted with a referee uniform. You've got a whistle hanging around your neck. You've got a cap on, and you're wearing a striped shirt. And you're not quite sure what you're supposed to do with this or what your expectations are, but you are now seen to be in some sort of position of power. Kremi, you're gifted a magical, I'll say a magical conch show from the court of choral that when spoken into amplifies your voice and allows you to speak to the crowd as a whole, and you're told to hold off until it's time for the event to start. And somehow, through all of this, Gideon and Cremie, or Gideon and Chuckles, have not destroyed each other yet.

They're just staring at each other, squaring off, getting ready to engage in a delicious combat. Ambush. Great. Great joke. For 15 minutes, I've been laughing. But all the while. It is the Hittie's laughter. Sure. The event is everyone has begun to settle down. The Bullywugs have their hot dogs and their peanuts and their drinks.

Everybody's excited and a hush begins to fall over the crowd as people begin to look out, is it going to stop? Do you think that they're going to fall? I don't know about who, but I just want to see someone killed. You're all huddled together in the middle. You are hand in the arena? So the four of you are huddled together in the arena. The two of you are focused directly on each other. You've got a clown gun in your face, but the two of you could easily have a quick conversation

before you begin the event. You and Torback. Yeah, that's just you too. All right, what's going on? It's pretty bad. It's pretty bad, Aguilip. I'm really worried that Gideon's going to kill Grico accidentally. Well, here's the thing.

You got to make sure that he beats him up until it looks like chuckles dies. Gonna stay in, that's your job. Oh, okay. Ready? No, because here we go. Froggies and tow people. I'm gonna be talking into the,

into the cock show. Cockshelf. Are you ready to see a bloodbath? Whoa, yeah. Kevin! Are you ready to see something you ain't never seen before? Do you all count as witnesses?

If so, cheer! We count his witnesses. Yeah, I think so. Yay! That's legally bonded. And begin. I immediately blow the whistle as soon as Tremi yells begin.

Hambush! We've been standing here for three hours. Yeah, what that thing's supposed to do? He's been born and having for forever. It'll be like this very. It's a strange-looking contraption that looks like a gun, but it has like this dark, it looks clown and circus-like, but it

almost has like this dark, shadowy nature to it. And as I pull the trigger, I forget what we roll of this. I don't think we rolled... You haven't rolled for damages, just rolled for the... You just won first. You went first, you drew it and we were going first, I should see. So you guys are each going to roll a D20,

and to see if it hits. Oh. 17. 2. Oh! It was just didn't it great. It just shh. Oh, that was my ninth level spell! A bully

log in the stands as you know. That's exactly what happens. A massive beam cannon eradicates the Colise. And standing there watching, you Torbeck and Kremi can hear some of the talk that's happening about who even is fighting?

They never renounced you this world. How do we know who's dying? Hot dogs, get your hot to shh! Man, this shadow felt stuff is pretty intense. Oh, hey, do you remember Gideon's like fake name? Yeah, it's muddlmundle mud. Why don't you introduce them?

And I throw the shell at you. Mundle mud's Earl of Swarmful. Sorry, Ribble, Ribble's got too close to the con. Oh, why is this thing? Oh. Shut up! Let them fight! Shut up! Wait real quick, I hear!

Shut up! Ripple just as nuts! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I immediately give the conch shell back to it. And I pointed to each of the mess at it. So wait, so what did you said muddle?

Muddled. It's squaw! But I missed my house. It's sploop. That's a very torquick thing to do. I was funny panic. pressure. Get your voovo-va-va-lilis.

Oh, I went out of turn, sorry. Oh, that was my life's use. I throw it behind me. And it hits the ground, there's what wailing souls. As it shatters and... All right, Gideon, it's your turn. All right, after dodging his disintegration beam blast, I'd like to charge at him

and try and whip my chain around them to see if I can get them wrapped up. Not doing any damage. Well, that's just from start. I don't punch them real hard. Am I running against this? Yep. It's a nine to wrap you up.

It's a natural one. So I would run up, flip the chain around you and attempt to get it to swirl around your form. And then... And then I would... We haven't even established a faith word. Bananaia, banana.

I don't know a safe word for you, you greasy corn out. And I pull them towards me and then try and not... Oh, well, greasy was just uncult. 17 to hit. How would... Do I... Am I ruling like... Yeah, you can rolling on step.

Well, I mean, I feel like it counts because you're wrapping me up and punching me, So I feel like that count. Yeah, I got a natural one. Oh, okay. Yeah, I think that's fair. You got a natural one. Do you want to rule of damage?

No. You just, you get a, I shouldn't mark this down. Max damage, got it. You send out your chains and you wrap up chuckles and just like, just like a, I'm just like a slinky, but just like the wrapping up of ribbons. It's he spins towards you as he laughs and flails his arms, completely oblivious to what's going to happen. happen next. And as his body slams into yours, you sink your fist into his face. And you

watch as his almost, almost like plastic-like face begins to like contort and stretch around your fist. It's almost like Gack from when you're a kid. You punch into it in his face and then comes back together. But it seems to do a significant amount of damage. metal clown bond bitch full metal clown and there will be a bunch of

colorful circus peanuts that just hit your face oh banana and my head will spin around and I will say um I'm not going to say that

Bud light get your Bud light here only 16 gold pieces so my head will spin around My spin around and I'll just outrageous As you knock my head It spins around, spins around, spins around

And I just look at you And I just spit a projectile vomit Of my least favorite bottle of the activity Oh god Not the clown asses That'll kill them right away Oh what a wonderful day for a blood bath And I am going to try

to, with my hands ripped, my grappled and restrained, is that how that works? Uh, yes. Uh, we'll say grappled. Uh, so I will, I will do that. I will attempt to, um, say, oh, Gideon, what's your favorite animal? Quick. It's a pig, man.

I've told you like four times. You've asked me every time you take over Griko's body, it's big. Oh, okay, coming right up. And I'm gonna, and as my hand, will inflate, I will try to basically burst into a bunch of balloon animal pigs out of the chains.

If that's something I can do. You can roll for it and see if you win. You can do it if you win the roll off. A three. Roll against it. One or two. I mean, 10% chance you fuck this out. A three. Roll again.

Oh. Oh, we roll again. Oh, it's like playing war when you're a kid. Eight. 19. Oh. You attempt to turn into these balloon animals, but you, and you do. You disperse into all these balloon pigs,

but the chains are hot, and the balloons are of a melty plastic, and they melt to and adhere to the chains, and the little pigs just wiggle and wiggle trying to get away. It's a horrific sight. Oh, oh, and my face will be melting off. Oh, I'll never be able to.

get this out. Oh no, just hold on. Oh, my plastic is burning, my rubber. And I'll take my hat, and I will pull it, uh, why, and I'll just pull it down and up and I'll return back to normal. Oh, that's much better and less graphic for the children. I know there's some tadpulled in the audience. You got to keep this PG. It's like men in black when it's a skin suit. Yeah, yeah. Better. Pretty good. Your turn, Gideon. Pretzels, get your pretzels, unsalted pretzels

with avocado-based mayo. Only 23 gold pieces. Oh, never, hold on one second, Gideon. Pssz. Okay, that was the last charge. Fuck that guy, right? I kind of wanted some of those, man. I'm a little hungry.

Unsalted pretzel? I'd eat anything. We're in a swam. God, do you hate yourself? Have a little bit of self-respect. The last guy's surprise, all right? you know what? Shut up! 18. Oh, I'm going to get a natural

20 here. I can feel it. A 14. Oh, fuck. Still wrapped up in the chains. I like to be, they don't have to be totally wrapping you, but like just around his waist or something. I like to keep pulling him in and then punching him back out. Yeah. And you pull him in, you punch him, and he spins out on the chain. You pull him back in, you punch him. This is the second one.

You're being snod out of him. You're beginning to see his form shipped, and you can see bits and pieces of Grico in there somewhere. Don't worry, buddy. I'm going to beat you right back. A few of my teeth are missing, like, in a very loony-tune style. Oh, a nice shot, Gideon. I don't let this horrible clown have your body, even if I have to bury you.

Well, you know what they say. I'm fine getting a little roughed up. You got to make an alma. You got to break a few hours. And then in my hands will be a big barrel that's bright and colorful but almost like a like a dark tone circus and I'm going to try to smash it over your head as a bunch of red monkeys spill out and cover you What a horrible way to go Tiny fleshyy monkeys oh my god Wow

seven one It's meant to be. It's desperate. Oh my God. I'm twisted or something. The monkey are no twist in this combat. The monkeys hit the ground and they begin to sizzle and pop. These were clearly a barrel of poison monkeys.

They would have annihilated acidic poisonous monkeys. They would have annihilated your flesh. But you were able to dodge out of the way as they sizzle. and pop into the earth and they run away and they run away. Oh no, I promise. I have more.

Bloody Mary's Get your bloody marries here. Bloody marries with one of those deep fried cheeseburgs on top of why the fuck not? Only 42 gold beer. Yes. With vendor bodies.

And another one comes truffling down the stairs. Like, fucking roller coaster tycoon. There's always more guests. Somebody just strep like, you know, sweeps off the record. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you waiting for, Gideon? What we do here will echo through oncturnity. Oh, my teeth are missing. There's blood coming out of my eyes.

Natural toy. 19! That's the worst number you could have got me. That's so much worse. Is there any chance that this would be, would I get the sense that this is a killing one, for instance? Or not, no, not close.

So I had said that it was going to be five. Whoever got to the fifth hit. Oh, okay. The natural one with the monkeys counted as a hit against him. And so that put you at three. A natural 20 counts as two. So this would be the fifth hit, per my calculations.

Ending it. Just give me one moment to say something before you do what you. Like, give me a point out. So I grab the end of the chains, and I whip a, like, a wave through him, launching him up in the air, and I leap up after him and grab him in my arms, spin upwards, and then...

I'll pull out a sign that says, uh-oh. And then, as I'm slammed down, Yeah, from 20 feet in the air, however I can get them by whipping the chains, I'll just pile, drive them back into the earth with a seismic toss. As I pull out the sign, I'll look at you and my time will stop. And all my eyes will go wide as my pupils get smaller, smaller, and red. As I will say, that's right, Gideon. entertain them

my clownsisters are smiling at me Gideon can you say the same you hear that you hear him say this to you and as you're falling you begin to see chuckles fade away as Grico's body is now in your arms

you realize it a second too late as you slam Grico's tiny goblin body into the ground you can hear all of his bones snapped beneath the body Don't worry, bud, I'm going to bring you back. If I sense that this is the end, Torbeck would blow the whistle to signify the end of the bout. I will say you can easily do that.

You have been watching this entire thing. You see the moment that this clown ceases to be chuckles and becomes Gricko. And you blow the whistle a second before, notating the win of Gideon against Chubb. I am literally in a hole in the ground. I'm just Yom-Ther. Yes, thank you.

Perfect. Thank you. I love Yom-Tazs, I'm really. It's so fucked, so funny. Dust has swirled up from the base of the Coliseum as it clears. Everyone looks upon. The Coliseum goes crazy. Everybody is tearing and screaming.

You'd long live, what was your name? It's Mundelmund. Oh, yeah. Wrong with it. Mundel mud the winner. Mundel mud has spelled the bow beast. Mundle mud has a clean slate. That's it, folks.

The clown's dead, and he disintegrated immediately, leaving a goblin he must have eaten earlier or something. It's over? Thanks for coming. Oh, shit. Does anyone want full cooked chicken piccata on dinner plates? Chicken paccata.

Hey, hot and fresh chicken paccata. Who wants some? One of the Bullywog stands up and says, shut up, we're listening! He stamps you in the back. Ah, lemony keepers. As the dust is settling from the athlete pile driver, I will look into the camera and say,

could Marquis have rode any worse? That was a streak. Holy shit. Holy shit. Unbelievable that the only role I lost was initiative. Yeah, you just absolutely enslaved it.

Yeah, you absolutely did. I'm sorry, that was chuckles. That was cuckles. Yikes. And with the bully wugs, you hear bits of conversation, oh, but that's supposed to be Electrocheon tonight.

I have to put on a new dress if I'm going to watch Electrum chef. Don't you think that there will be something going on in the opera? I don't know. I haven't seen an opera in 15 years, but I'd like to see one tonight if you'll escort me, Jennifer. And they begin to make... Just make a name. I know that's Jennifer. I want to go see the opera.

And they, without a second glance, now that this is over, they're no longer interested as they all begin to make their way towards the castle to prepare themselves for the night's... endeavors. May Torbeck keep the small brass whistle? Yes. Ooh. I tuck it away in my filthy sack. Right next story, he keeps his bag.

I immediately start looking around for Frost and Twig. And see. I can't believe we've had 33 bodies and not a key on one guy. I don't know what to do. I could have sworn it was right over here. And as you look around, you see that there, it's like, it's like the book and movie holes.

I don't know what to do. We just have to keep digging. We need to get that key. If we're going to free more go, I wanted to say more mo. I don't even know who she is, but okay. Yes, yes, yes. Don't you have some sort of innate abilities That might be able to seek something out

I can only do things with my mind When I've not been spending the days Like I have I don't have the ability No Have you ever had hiccups before? Yes, one Yeah, no, the only thing I could do is this And you feel your vampiric

Delusion leave you What have I done? Yeah, that's all I can do. I've murdered two innocent people. What do you mean? I bit my friend Grico. What do you mean? I tried to turn you into a servant of the night.

What do you mean? I feel... I was under the influence of fame magic. That convinced me that I was a vampire. I didn't get any... My body is full... My stomach. It's full of blood, but it doesn't bring me nourishment.

I'm not a vampire. This is... I've done terrible things, Swig. Vampire? No, I'm sorry. Thank you for believing in me. It's very kind, but...

Yeah. Time for an existential crisis. With the vampire confusion out of my mind, I think I may actually remember where we buried the initial bodies. Okay.

I'm sorry. I can still call you Twigfield if you like. I would like that a lot, but only in secrets or nobody else knows. Yes, I like that part too. one, two, three three trees from the entrance and about 24 paces.

Follow me. Let's go. Bags of blood! Bags of mysterious humanoid blood! I break his neck with my mind and I can chin. Without the vampire cloud confusion, I'd like to think that Frost would immediately be able to find I would say easily.

And so it takes, it takes some more time. And I would say you stand here waiting for a while and you don't, you don't see Frost coming back. There's no twig. You imagine you're going to have to, you're going to have to seek them out yourself. Can you make sure he's not dead?

Here, I think I still have one of these from earlier. Yeah, I do. He's fine, man. He's just playing dead. He does this every time I hit him. All right. Hold still, Grico. I'm going to run over to you.

And trying to be, like, as gentle as I can, but, like, you know, a lot bigger than you. I'm going to, like, grab your face with my, like, horrific... And just, like, jam the entire banana down your throat and, like, stick my finger, like, way. And, like, push the banana down your throat. Come on, Grico, small the banana! And I have this disgusting, long finger that's like pushing the banana down your throat.

You can do it, Grico! I get him to chew it up, like, move his jaw back and forth a little bit, you know? Okay. Ah! Come on! And then I'll start, like, rubbing your throat, but I'm like, come on!

Twig feet. Live, damn it! We have to run, Twigfield. I have a sense that somebody's jamming an unpeeled banana down someone's throat. Red. Oh, red. It's okay. We established it was banana beforehand, so that means nothing.

He's just talking crazy. Keep going. Keep going. My ears, I hear some. Torbeck here or something. Mike, make a death-saving throw, please. Real. Like, now the 20 will come.

All of these nights. Now the 20 will come. I was convinced. Roll this tiny guy, right? Yeah, roll another one. Two! Oh, no! No!

No! No! You got the stink on you. Surely the bananas reached his stomach acid. It's about this time that the magics of the banana takes hold. You feel yourself on the brink of death. Your jaw is splintered into hundreds of pieces. Your bones are nothing but shards of marrow floating in your man flesh.

but you can breathe again. As you can say this doesn't happen. But as my consciousness is dying as I have no idea what just happened as chuckle's been ripped from my brain. As I'm failing my dead savings so Torbic is doing just as much harm as good.

I feel like my vision is dark and suddenly it starts to fade in as there's like rattling on a cart. And then I see I'm like, yeah, and I hear like the carnival sounds, and I'm on like basically a big, goofy clown cart and chuckled in there and says, oh, good, you're awake. Oh, no! As I come back. As soon as you're breathing, I would have been like, oh, crick always breathe.

And I would like scoop you up and like hug you very tight. It's about this time. Yep, that's his shoe right there. You were right, Frost. I can't believe it took this long. Do you think that we have to re-mary the other 33 monies or do you think that the swamp will do its work? Yeah. Great. You know the swamp better than I do. I just want to know, okay, well, I'll pull the shoe off and presumably the key is inside and I'll put the shoe back. I'll pull the other shoe off and presumably the key isn't...

He's undoing his man He's un- It's harder than it looks to make it I mean, to be fair, he's comfort and swamp gunk, so it's sticking it You know how when you try and put pants on When you just get out of the shower It sticks to your skin?

No. Oh Mm. It happens when the regular mortis says It happens if you try to put your pants on right after you take a towel. Don't you towel? up first. I have a tell.

No, not every time. Fun fact. I once learned that Steve Corell apparently does not dry off. He puts his clothes on immediately after the showers, and I can't stop thinking about it in this moment. That reminds me of something I learned long ago. He was pretty funny and ever and almighty. Just hold on to the other side and tug with me. We need to get these pants

I'm sure it's sitting here for some reason. Okay. We undress both of the corpse until we find the key. You find no key. Oh my gosh. There's no key on these scarred's bodies. Do you think it fell up into the muck? I'll reach around with my mind hand and see if I can find it.

You can't give a reach around with your mind? I can reach around with my mind hand anytime I want to. Get in, voice from nowhere. I can give him a little tug while I'm at it. Why do you think I'm wearing this fucking robe? I'll search around to the bottom of the swamp and see it. Oh, that was the wind. Oh, an investigation check.

Are we playing Dungeons and Dragons? Oh, that's a D-100. That's not right. Oh. Give me some hot 23 action. You look around and it's very clear there's no key here. Oh, crap. his guards didn't possess the key

oh no I feel I'm convinced do you think perhaps one of them dropped it when I initially dropped them at the entrance I mean it's possible I wasn't there at the time when I came back they were mostly already

submerged in the mock and you were discovered in blood thinking you were missed yes I did think I was missed let's hope that it's at the entrance and perhaps one of them dropped it when I Okay, I'll help you. And you can roll with advantage to look at the entrance. Cat-quist this.

Yes. Right. Looking around, it's very clear that there are no signs, Vicki. Anyway. Well... We're going to have to go tell Kremi, and I don't think he's going to like the words that come out of our face. No, no, he's not going to like these words at all.

I think he's going to yell at Twig? I'll let him yell at me. I'll take the brunt of it for you. Okay. I don't get yelled at very well. I'm lagered out, you know? Oh, yes, yes. I've forgotten about the Humphrey.

The Humphrey? It's not important. I'm just really hoping I get that fourth world promptly. All right, well, let's go towards the back and let Cremie know the bad news. Okay. Churros and the sheep of a pretzel. It's not deserved it. It's in the shape of a pretzel.

34, buddy. At this point, you have just brought Grico, too. He's alive. You feel like a god. How big is that you? It's Ripple, but yes. Oh, that's right. Ripple, I forgot.

Did we? do it. Oh, well, we did something. I probably still have as much context as you. Hooray. I'd like to walk up and just gruffly pat Grickle on the back

and say, hey, you did great, man. I'm happy you're back. Oh, did I? Yeah. Do you think this vendor is selling any popsicles? It's clear at this time that every single vendor that had been here is gone now.

The entire stadium is cleared out. And popsicles, he slips and things. He made me shaping gumballs in the eyes. Well, I think that guy was selling popsicles, and I mean, there's one there, but it fell on all the dirt and blood and bones and stuff, so, I mean,

oh, yeah, what an idiot got his blood and bones everywhere. Oh, and the teeth. Yeah. I don't think you want to eat that. I mean, that's mostly you. I love that in Griko's reality. Morgot just threw a fucking glass of swamp water at face,

and then you woke up water. That was one hell of a swamp water. While that is all happening, I would be very anxiously looking like around the hut where the jail is to just get any sign of Frost and Twig, just like open for the key. And you don't look too long

before you see Frost and Twig walk around the side of the hut. Both of their heads held low as they walked towards you dejectedly. You're going to yell at anyone, Kremi. Oh, Baron, help me. And I'm going to just, like, you just sort of like speedwalked or speedwalking after them when I see that they look disappointed. When I get in, like, close enough, I said, please tell me you found the key. No, we didn't find the key. I don't think the guards.

Morghumus must have been mistaken. We did find the original bodies, but there wasn't a key on them, nor was there any in the mud, nor was it at the entrance. They must not have had that key, I swear to you. I mean, she said the prison guards had the key, and it's a magic key. Right? I know she said that to you. You're damn sure you found the two gods you killed, allegedly. Well, uh, understand that I was under a curse that made me

insinced that I was a vampire. That's why I went out and did the things that I did. That's why I was, you found me the way that I was. I was. But once that cleared and I was able to use my mind, I was able to investigate thoroughly. You have to believe me.

I left no swamp rock left unturned. Torbeck, you'll furnish yourself. I look around Cremie, and I see the scene with Gideon and Torbeck and the other one, Grigo. Hey, Frosty! What happened to your, Grammy? And everything, the plan went perfectly.

I mean, every part of the plan except your part of the plan, and I mean, unfortunately, I don't know what the fuck we're going to do. Wait, the key, what if by magic key she meant like, oh, the key is like a code word that they say, and it's a magic word they speak to open and unlock it and unlock it. It was like their friendship or something, and each one of them had to touch the gate and the door would just swing open. Wouldn't that have been funny? Oh, that's magical. Yeah, it would be magical. Or maybe it was just different guards that had the key.

We'll just wait until they show up. We have all those witnesses. And, you know, hopefully by then, the world will spread. Oh, wait, what happened to the guards that were out there? Oh, uh, um, you know what? Get, because it's you, Frost, to kill them. Oh, that's awesome, man.

Why do that? Yeah, he, like, ripped the fucking throat out. Holy shit. Yep. Yes, and I made one of them watch. Yeah, real sadistic stuff. Like psychopaths, serial killers. Can't you just kill them with your mind?

Like, why'd you have to make one watch? Well, I wanted their hearts beating while I suck the blood from their body, if you have to ask. Is that anything? It wasn't, but now that you explained it, it makes perfect sense. I'm ashamed of what I did.

Well, the good news is is that if downfall is a union town, their replacement should be showing up right on time according to their negotiated shift start. I wonder when that is. We could ask a morgo, or perhaps she has an idea about where the key could be if she understands that the guards didn't have that on them.

Yeah, we're going to have to... Don't tell her you killed the guards, but maybe say that they skipped out because they, you know, heard the commotion on the other side, and they just enjoy the festivities and left. Perhaps they enjoyed the festivities so much. They went on a vacation. Oh, yeah, that's a great idea.

Enjoy other varieties of similar festivities in other lands. And they probably packed with them, like, you know, a variety of clothing in case it got too hot or too cold, and it's kind of more of a temperate area. The nights might be a little chilly, you know. She really had to have a pair of jeans as well. I'll mention that if she asks. I don't know how that helps me with this lie. I felt like the vacation thing was really solid.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's a good idea. It's a vacation. Where are they going? They're going to yawn to see other trials by combat. Oh, yeah. And they booked it with their travel agent Stacy. And she said they should pack a pair of jeans for the trillion knots. Yes, I solicited all of this information when I asked about the key, and they told them, told me that they didn't have them, correct?

Yeah, it's a good idea. And they took a balloon. Oh, they took a balloon. Yeah, they were saving up, and they were able to get business class because they don't get to trade these trips very often. Okay. So, that's a good idea. Wait, why are they coming back? How long is the trip? You know, they didn't mention it.

They didn't, they said vacation. Well, that's not very believable. If we don't know how long it is. Look, I don't really want to lie to Morgor, all right? Why don't we just go in there and say, oh, the gods didn't have the key? Was it another set of gods? Do they show up later? When do they show up?

Was it a special? What is it? Was it a key in like a metaphorical sense? Oh. All right. Let me just let me. I'm not sure. I'm still feeling a little lost for my experience earlier.

My magical hand produces a dinner plate. Oh, chicken but cut. Oh, is that a chiro shaped like a pretzel? I'll tuck in the bloody Mary. I make my way back to Morgow. It's presuming everyone comes with me. Yeah, we go back inside. All right, Morgho, it's done.

I got at least 50 witnesses, probably close to 100. Some of them are dead. All right. Well, I'm long. unlocked the cell. Well, here's the thing. No, no, no, no. Here's the thing. No, here's the thing. The gods didn't have the keys on. What do you mean they did? Of course they had the keys on. They each should have had a key. They each had a key. Yes. Well, according to them, they didn't have any keys.

Around the neck they wore a chain, and on it there was a metal frog-shaped box, and inside of it was a small key. These are details I could have used earlier. earlier. Oh, you mean like this, that I took off the cards before we buried them? And she holds up exactly what Morgo has described. We're going to talk about this later, Twigfield. Did I do good? Well, there's the sandals that they wanted to go to.

So they have, oh, all right, here we're going. No, no, no, no, no. He said hit the ground. Yes, they told us, they gave us the keys that Twig just produced Morgo, and And then they said that they were going to go to... Yeah, I like frogs. I thought it was a real one. So I tried to lick it.

And then I realized there was a necklace that I thought, well, I can't lick it, but I could wear it. So I took it. Because we were going to bury him anyway, so I didn't think it'd be a big deal. You are a genius, twig. Thanks. You can keep those once we use them to free morgo. Okay. And the key, too?

May I see the keys? Well, you'll get them back. I've been really attached to both of them. Yes. We just need to, it's a key inside the, it's like a frog locket with a key inside, right? Frog with a key inside, like one of those deals. This one's named Bill, and this one's Ted. And in my mind, they can travel through time.

That's ridiculous. You know, we can all travel through time. They would have the most bogus adventures. Do you mind if I take a look at one of those? Well, I don't know. Ask them. What to do there, Mr. Frog, pendant key thing? Ask them by their names. What are their names?

I just told you, too. It's Bill and Ted, man. It's Bill and Ted. You're not a very good listener, Kremlin. You being little, all right. Bill, Ted, do you mind if I open you up and pull out one of them keys? I just need one.

And give them back to Twig afterwards? Give it back in 30 seconds at last. Is it okay? Oh, your peach is free. That's what the green baron guarantee. I just snap one open and grab the key out. And they open very easily, and they're clearly two identical keys inside.

It looks like whichever guard had been here would have easily been able to use it to unlock the key. Once immediately unlock the key, throw it back in, and pass it back in the wig. Yes. Hot bell, hot head. And she puts them both around her neck. Totally.

TOTO. All right. The gate to the cage swings open, and Morgau stands up, and she picks up the few belongings she had with her. Something appears to look like a journal, a small satchel, a rock, a couple of other things. She shoves into her bag and writes the hood on her neck and on her shoulders. Well, thank you for that. We have a lot to do, but I promise I'm honorable. I will be a valuable companion, and you've done a great service to me this day.

And so, Morgau, previously the former, but now the current knight of warts, is eternally in your dead. And she moves to step forward, and as she does, she slams into a magical force field, and shoots backwards back into the cage. She looks up and she goes, did you make sure to mention my name in the tournament?

And that is where we'll end this session. Oops. Oh, no. And Maki was thinking that. But Bricko was in chuckles who didn't care about such. things. And so there was no way to ask if that any

of the witnesses were clear that Morga was being felt. It's too hot for these mind games, Nikki. This is our shit. I was just an accomplice to two murders. It's like one of those hell loops where you open the door and you're still in prison.

Honestly, I think our body count for this episode is the highest so far. Certainly. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Aventures podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin Tier or Hire to unlock Shroud over Saltmarsh, a patron exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com slash Legends of Aventrys. If you want to chat about the episode with the Avengers community,

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