Legends of Avantris - Once Upon a Witchlight | Ep. 65 | House on Shetland Hill

Episode Date: August 25, 2025

Our heroes visit a house atop a pony in hopes of reclaiming their wishes...   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/cSm9UcS6DRA?si=eONti4k7TPsBkv-y

Greetings. You're listening to Legends of Aventress. My name is Morning Frost, and this is Once Upon a Witchlight. Here's what happened last time. So there's a bunch of scary wishes that we gotta go through before we meet out about them. We got to go get our wishes back, right? I mean, that's... We gotta go find them wishes, and then we got to go find that solclops before we make it up to them up to them up to them up to them. I thought we didn't have to find Cyclops anymore. I thought he knew he was like a good guy or something. No, we still didn't like figure out as deep. But you should put aside differences with the decorants. Oh, cool, we could never do that.

Oh, do we not tell you about everything? They're like totally chill. They also hate Adelaide. They hate Adelaide. Yes, yes, you're actually allies. You just don't know it because we believe you're being deceived, both of you. You are all able to make it to the opposite side of the bridge.

You find yourself, the moment you step off of this bridge, you're met with a gentle warm breeze. This grotto is quite beautiful. It's verdant. The moisture hangs in the air from a crystalline waterfall off in the distance. And as you look through what is an arched cavern, foliage hanging down over it almost like a curtain, but you're able to peek in and see that this, the grotto on the other side, there's a sparkling pool off to one side at the base of the waterfall.

There are candles just everywhere nestled along the rock faces, illuminating the space, is quite beautiful. and munching on an apple, occasionally drinking out of the little pond, is what is very clearly a small pony. Atop its saddle is a little house strapped in a little porch, a two-story house, quite cute. And sitting on the porch of this little house in a rocking chair is a very small, very elderly Brickinock. You've spent a significant amount of time deep inside the mountain that is home to the Brighamonks. You have met these uncanny folk who you expected to be evil and in league with bitter end, but you found them to be a small folk who, just like the cords before them, sadly misinformed about alliances. Having spent time in the same,

and they're in their home, playing games, and enjoying their company and their hospitality, you eventually make your way to the bridge that spans over the large chasm that houses all of the dark wishes that have found, that have made this place their home. A trist with some trolls slowed down your journey, but you eventually find yourselves here. You are standing at the very edge of this bridge.

looking into what is a beautiful almost bioluminescent cavern. There is light here that's not just from lanterns that are ensconced on the walls, but also from algae that glows with beautiful greens, blues, and purple lights. A large waterfall is pouring down from the wall at the back, and a beautiful pool of crystalline water is spilling out in front of it. There is vegetation here significantly more than anywhere else that you've seen inside of this place. And it's quite beautiful. A soft dusting of grass is slowly encroaching towards your feet.

And the closer you get into this, what you had been told is an oasis. You realize why they've called it that for it truly is. It is beautiful. Your eyes are drawn to some flickering movement. right around the pond's edge. You see a small pony, akin to the Shetland ponies are the ones that are really tiny, right?

They're smaller. I don't know ponies. Well, I would like for you to know ponies. Derek, you are so pony-coated, it shocks me that you couldn't answer that question. Derek is pony-coded? No, no. Of course, he's pony-coted.

If the animal isn't a cat, he's uninterest in. Oh, that's fair. That's fair. That's fair. But no, Derek definitely gives, like, I know pony knowledge. They're the small ones. Yeah. Build a pony.

So you see in front of you a very small pony. It's clearly an adult pony, but much smaller than you would expect. This is the sort of horse pony that would be a perfect fit for someone Grico's size. But where the saddle should be is, in fact, where the saddle should be is in fact a house, a small wooden house with a porch jutting out from the front. On the back of the horse. I did not see that.

Of the pony, May. Of the tiny pony. Sorry, I forgot how much geared about pony. I wish it was a Darth Moore. You look towards and you see that this little house is completely illuminated with flickering candlelight. On the porch in front of this, house is a small rocking chair that as the pony leans down to lap up some water, you watch

as it rocks this way and that, the creaking of the wood echoing throughout this place. And from inside, you can, you can hear noises as you listen. The sound of the waterfall obfuscates the noise from within, but you listen intently and you're able to hear what sounds like faint mumblings, the sounds of pots and pans is being moved around. There is clearly someone inside of this place. Does it sound like casual and mundane? Or is it because the house is rocking back and forth,

like all the stuff is falling out of the cabinets? It sounds like there's someone inside rustling around in cabinets. What's like the size of a doll house? Yeah, I can show you. Who's the size of a pony? I will show a Shetland pony ass. How crazy would it be we just lit the pony and the house on fire?

You know, that's something you could. It would go into a water fall. They already have a problem. Well, this can't be relevant at all. So this is what you're looking. Oh, wow. Oh, the front is facing the front of the ponies. Okay.

I expect it to be more like. You were looking at a little fatch-roofed house mounted atop this pony. Passed roofed house. You see that outside, the pony is milling about drinking water. Not really, if it's noticed you, it doesn't seem to be alarmed by you in any way.

One thing I will say, roll a group perception check. Oh my god, dice. I got this campaign. I'm going to, Nick, you don't worry. Hold on, I got it, I got it. Yes. Perception? Pat. Creon and I was prepared.

I was prepared and I was rewarded. I was rewarded with a natural one. I don't have my dice. Did you say perception? Or I do. I do. I do. I'm going to be in the wrong case.

Oh, no, I'm on you. Which set of avantress dice should I use tonight? A salute before. Well, the fucking, I guess he's failed. It failed. Do I want to use my Aventra's gemstone dice? Yes. Or my uprooted dice.

Do you want to use Beasleberry dice? Oh, if you think I don't have Beaselberry red dots, Roe number two. Oh, you have a whole thing over there. There's got a home container. Excuse me. Excuse me, this is my magical container of Aventra's dice. Man, people are going to think this is so fake.

Oh, yeah, I just have to have my advantage of a date number year. You know what, you're right. I'm going to use, I'm going to use my Beantzance dice tonight. Oh, Barre-Ebron. See, the blue ones, the basal dice. 100%. I agree with you.

I agree with you. Oh my God, what's the password this before? I get a seven. It's because I'm distracted by which type of pony this is, and I'm a set that it looks like a Shetland. I really wanted it to be a Darth Moore. But you can't win them all. Darth Mall?

Well, you know. I also got a 25. Nice thing. Is this perception? Yes. That's my plus. Also, no, it's perception. Because that's what I asked for.

I only use one dive in the entire. I got a, 17. Got it all right. 17, okay. What did you get, what did you get Anthony? No more Mario cut for the next month, Anthony. That's very cool.

That's very cool. You're gonna have a talk about this. I'm gonna talk about. Real ones know what I'm talking about. Real ones know. That's very funny. I, Randy, got a 10. So we got a 10, 25 ponies, 25.

25 and a 14, 17, 17. Okay, easy enough. Even though there are so many things for you to take in, now that you've made your way down to this grotto, your eyes catch a familiar glimps. And you notice that there are a total of three different barrels that are filled full of wishstones. They seem to be, the light that they're shining

is that effervescently. the one that you have come to associate with good or kind wishes. Hmm. In the house or on- Just in the grotto. There are barrels off to the side. Are those full-sized barrels? They are very, they're very clearly Brigh-Nock-sized barrels.

But this house is smaller than Brigh-Nock-sized, or it is Brigh-Nox-sized? It's Brigh-Nox-sized. With the experience that you've had, staying in Brigh-Nock houses. Oh, yeah. I thought Tuppick was like this big. Wait, can we fit in this house that we're looking at? No. No, no, no, no.

Well, you stayed in Molly's house and she was a human child. Yeah, they'd made a different house. She was a human child. She's dead now. Yeah. Because they're like mice. Well, of course she's dead now because you were kind of her. No, they're cobalts, they're cobalts, right?

No, cobalts are like op-oples. I told me, they're 12. They're 12 inches tall. But they're smaller than that. They're about 12 inches tall. They're about a foot tall. They're Barbie-sized. Like that tall.

We got to be even smaller than that. fit in that house. Yeah, yeah. In order to fit in a dollhouse, I mean, I'm thinking like it's like three inches tall. This is the Faywild, okay? Hello. This is a large house on top of a pony. I actually didn't hear this one.

Now, can you please hear of peanut? I was looking at you because you would have really have liked it. I said they're at least three inches tall. That was really, yes. Yes. Thanks, base. Hello. Am I still king's baby lock?

Did that wear off? That wear off as you can. I'm sorry came across. No, you're over it. And just to maintain game stuff. Yes. Just because we are going through like a story and all that. Really?

We were told to, we were looking for like old, old lev. You were looking for Obed. Obed. Obed. You were looking. It is, yeah, no, you did, you did well. You were looking for Obed. You were pretty close.

You were pretty close. In Obeds Grotto. Obed. Yeah, Obeds Grotto. He is the, what you know about him so far is that he is a, He is the eldest of the Colbolts. He is the Colbord, the Colbolts. You guys have fucked me up with this. Oh, that's working.

The Brighenox. Oh, God, we're done, we're done. He is the eldest of the Brighamov. He is the eldest of the Brighanox. He is their patriarch, and it is through him that you will gain permission and entrance to the tunnel that leads to Mother. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. We have to talk to him to get to Motherhorn. Yes. Yeah. And looking around, you, I would say, with those perception checks, you're able to see that at least from this vantage point, it doesn't look that there look like there's any entrance here that would lead deeper into the mountain.

We also thought that, who's the elf? Gleam. Gleam. We also thought Gleem came here, right? Gleam is supposed to be here as well, yes. Okay, okay. That's optional. But we're doing, we're going to platinum this campaign.

We're gonna close to the five in this campaign. Oh, everybody knows that. I need me to roll that on the beginning. Just ignore that. I saw that. That's great. You didn't see it. Just ignore it, please.

Armrex genius. So as it stands in this moment, you have all stepped off of the bridge that made its way over the very windy cavern, and you are now faced with your on a stone section of the ground now, but you see that there is foliage and vegetation, climbing its way towards this area.

You can see that it's fed by the water coming in from the waterfall. It's a verdant. Or is it like Mardon green? It's like a little oasis. It's like going in the whaling caverns. Oh, okay. You're not waiting caverns than Mardon?

I was thinking where Arro and Ang walk out into the crystal caves at the end of season two. I was thinking, is there a lot of gathering card verdant catacombs? I don't know. Perfect, yeah. I love that. I love that.

We seem to a transition from dripstone to lush cave. Very interesting. And you would know that. Yeah. We referenced five different things. We can't agree on one. What? Yeah, real ones know what I'm talking about. Yeah. I'm talking about misting there.

My favorite game from my favorite game. Okay. Where are the white pages? Obed. Hello. We are carnivala crew. We are on a mission. We need to get to Mavahorn. What do we have to do? To get to Woverhorn. And you're just standing here at the...

Yes. at the back of the. Obed, we need your help. What to do? Everyone make sure that we don't start a little. The pony looks up and looks up towards you and you see that just chomping away on a bit of vegetation as little teeth are grinding into whatever these vines are

as it gulps it down. It looks at you for a little longer than you would expect and then shakes out its mane and continues to lap up more water and pull up more vegetation. Is anyone going to freak out if Torbeck eats the pony? Probably not the best thing to do, Torbett, not natural. The whole fucking bony? No. It's a running joke.

Torbeck's just trying this new comedy thing. It's the second time, rule of threes. Expect one more to future day. All right, I already forgot about the first. Is this kind of a budget for two more, at least? You're so hungry you can eat a horse? Is that now a good? That's pretty good.

Get in. Do you want to go on the road with Tormax? We're already on the road, man. We are a hard for doing comedy. What? Did any of you take candy from the Goblin Marketplace? Yes. I don't believe that was at the Goblin Marketplace.

We definitely did. I got tall. You were spending time with your toilet. I got tall. I don't know that I did. Sugar-free. I don't know if I can sue that you. I'm sugar-free.

No, no more. We know that Krigger was out. We know that Grigel was affected by it. I don't know if I took some and I didn't eat it or if I didn't even take it. I can't remember. Did any of you, would you imagine that any of you would have any leftover Goblin Marketplace candy in your packs?

Not a chance. If Torbett took it, not a chance. Hold on. I don't want to be cool if I did. No, you didn't. You had an appointment with Dr. Toilert. Just tell me, would it be cool? Doctor, I didn't.

What's the right answer? What's the right answer? The probing makes sense now. I have two bass lists guys. I have an all problem. plush, I have a cookie cutter shape of a unicorn, a dandelion, disguised self-paint, self-face paint, empty-paint, empty-paint, empty-card depicting a fairy dragon, a floating rock, frost finger nail, grigger deep, and all the mask from courage the Carly dog.

A piece of parchment with a drawing of anoni, a sycamore seed, and a unicorn. The things I do for love, Maryland! Okay. So the answer to that is no. Let's say that I do. I think that's fair. Yeah, we'll just say that I do. Thank you.

Surely nothing will come to that. Anybody have to read a novel or two about this situation when they were a kid? I don't know what could you post a man. You didn't have to read Little House on the Pony? They would always go down at the general store buying rock candy. That was like back then, you know, like one copper piece could buy you. We weren't allowed to read fiction. It is as you say the word rock candy.

That you feel something tug at the side of your body and you realize that the pony has made its way over to you, smelling something in your satchel, it is pulling at the pouch on the side of your body, attempting to remove it from you. It looks up at you for just a second, trying to gauge whether you notice it you make eye contact, but it pretends like it doesn't notice that you've made eye contact as it slowly moves its teeth down and unties your satchel

as it drops. It doesn't move. It waits to see if you'll do anything as your pouch drops. and then as you watch it, it slowly sinks down and takes it in its mouth. What do you do? Oh my God. And begins to slowly back away.

Drop it. It stops. It looks up at you. Excuse you. That's mine. Please bring it back. You watch as the pony's tail lowers. And with its tail between its legs,

you walks slowly forward towards you. He looks up at you one more time. It's almost as if asking you with his eyes alone if you're sure. Are you looking for something in particular? I mean, I think I may have a gold piece. Are you like, that kind of horse that likes to steal? You know, I mean, clearly you like stealing the-

Can buy and steal in the favor? I'm not going to be that against the rules. He slowly puts the satchel back down on the ground. And with one of his who's, he, pushes it to the side so that some of the items on the inside spill out. You can see part of the only drawing peeking out. But it is a piece of rock candy that he seems to, that seems to be drawing his attention as he attempts with his hoof to, like,

pull it out of the satchel. And you can see he's getting a little frustrated as he's not, he doesn't have fingers or opposable thumbs. And so he's struggling. But he keeps looking up at you and then pawing at the, at the rock candy and then looking up at you, almost as if asking for permission. Feed the voting.

You're moving all my stuff. I mean, if you're looking for something in particular, you see fucking horsewoods. Probably looking for food. I'm going to lean down and, like, start to collect my stuff and try to get it back. Give me that. Toby, can you come to help me with this?

Yeah. He drops his head and he moves backwards saying that you're rounding everything back up. The, you're like, bo, blu-da. Yeah. The pony rears back and lets out a horrified nay as he charges backwards and begins to run around in circles, absolutely horrified.

I thought I had this. I forgot I had this. It was so funny. That wasn't cool, Mr. Crammy. Oh, I got. I'm gonna chase after the pony, and I'm going to try to get into a, range to cast calm emotions on it

to try and calm its fear. I don't want this house to suddenly fall off of its body and destroy Obeds home. Is that the force of humanoid? Well, that's actually a very good point. Well, see if it's not. It might be so humanoid. No, you're right.

It wouldn't work on this. Is it just humanoid? I'm going to attempt to calm the pony without using magic. You're supposed to be the smart one. Roll an animal handling check at disadvantage. It doesn't even know how it was magic works. Guys, we can also test it just by talking to it.

Hey, pony, do a flip. You can't understand us. Not badgering the pony. You rush over towards the pony. And it is rearing back. It's getting back onto its hind legs. It's thrashing about. You see the little house is being whipped back and forth

as the pony is panicking. And you can hear sounds from the inside. It sounds like someone is inside also hollering and shouting. But you run up to the pony and you stop in front of it and in such a calm manner. What do you do to try and calm the pony? I'm going to speak calmly to it. Yes. What do you say?

I'm going to say, there now, pony, everything's going to be all right. It was just as Gary Mask. He was not thinking clearly. If you just slow your trot and come to a stop, well, everything will be fine and you won't drop the precious house that's on your saddleback. Boobin, you're crashing your coat.

Your house is driving. There's a man coming on your own and watch out. Your house is a man. You're not about to be used by a vehicle or wagon. You seem like a pony from the prime material plane. You're not a unicorn or a Pegasai. This is remarkable. Against my better,

judgment and the way that just things work. The pony seems to be lulled into a sense of comfort by your monotone voice. There you go. It's all right. It's all right. We're going to get you something to eat. Food. The moment you say the word food, you see his ears perk up and he looks to you and lets out another nay.

As he moves towards you and begins nudging the side of your body with his eyes, his head from one side to the next, sniffing you, your robes, as well as the satchels that you carry on you as he looks for food. Oh, you know, in that book, they were always talking about rock candy, and I think I still have from that goblin market. Oh, yeah, man. It's right here. Man, that guy didn't have too much longer to go, huh?

That was really good. The pony grabs a hold of part of your robe and begins to almost lead you. towards the water and not to, to the edge of it, but not into, but around towards where the waterfall is falling into it. Do you follow along with it? As I'm being pulled, I'm still looking through my pack, and I do find a single ration.

And so once we reach the edge of the waterfall, which I can only assume. Is it pemmican? Yes. It's, no, no, no, no, no, it's Wimikin. It's dry soup. It's hard, hold on. What?

It's blue. Dry soup? What is it? Even your soup is dry. It's not hardened soup. What is the Survivor's? Dry soup. It's just weird.

I'm gonna call it dry soup. You wouldn't even eat dry soup. It's portable soup. It's portable soup, which is basically like a leathery, hardened broth or stock. That's awful, yeah. It's like soup leather. It's like if you could turn...

It's soup by the foot. Yeah. It's like through. fruit leather, but meat by the paper. I pull it out of its wax paper wrap. And you unroll some soup by the foot. There you are. I have some soup by the foot for you.

He lets go of the part of your robe and allows you to to feed him the soup by the foot. And he seems incredibly happy. I can only assume there's something behind this waterfall on a video game. Once he's done consuming the soup by the foot, he once again grabs part of your robe and continues used to nudge you away from your friends and closer towards the waterfall.

Are you, are you coming? I think there's something behind this waterfall, or perhaps this pony is about to drown me. I think it's the second one, Frost. Have you him that soup? Tobak? It's my portable soup. My arms are really tired. Can you please? Oh, but Torbeck's having a good time. It's just a little heavy. I think it's all the metal that's in your bones. Okay. Torbeck will stay.

Hand on his own two feet. Hey, Grico, can you talk to this guy? Oh, yeah. I got to see with animals. Go off him some rock candy here. Hey, much, do you like rock candy? The horse is completely enamored with Frost at this point and not paying any attention to what Frost is or something.

You know, some people call it bullion. What am I fucking saying? You do notice that its ears peek up when you say something to it. But it is engaged at this moment. As you make your way, swans. This guy. This guy, this guy, swans and horses.

That was subtle. As you get to the edge of this pond, you're back now against the wall. You're being sprayed by the fine mist from the waterfall, and you realize that there's nothing behind this waterfall. There's no exit or cavern or anything. But there is these beautiful vines that snake down the wall with these lovely petals on them.

And you'll see that deep inside of them where the stamen should be are these almost rock candy-like stamen. And the pony brings you over to them and nudges you towards them as if trying to to bring them into your attention. Almost as like an offering. What is it, uh, pony? Do you want, do you want to eat this?

Do you want me to like plug it for you and give it to you? Tap once for yes and twice for no. We'll just say yes and no. It looks at you. It seems confused by by Grico, but it looks to you. It says, It taps twice for now.

Oh. But you see that it picks up one of its hooves and attempts to move the flower towards you. I will reach down and pick up the flower. It taps once for yes. Thank you, Pony, for this flower. You know, my companion there, I believe, is able to understand you and speak with you. It taps once for yes. So you were aware that the goblin can talk to you?

It taps once for yes. Why is it done you ignoring you, yeah, why are you ignoring my friend? It looks confused at you, like, how does it tap once for yes or twice for no to respond to this? Oh, yes. And then it taps twice for no. Hmm.

Do you want me to consume this or is it a- It taps once for yes. Yeah, Frost, eat the mysterious flower. This is a very smart. Smart cave, man. This is a very smart pony, and I trust it. And I think that we need to earn it. Ooh.

What's a statement? Are you just trying to look it up? I'm trying to look at it up, man. Yeah, Frost. Suck on the flower. Yeah, come on. Get all that nectar out there. My lips extends. I do a disgusting tube.

I don't know. You know what? I'll taste the, actually, I'm going to smell and sort of observe it. Can I get any sense of, like, Yeah, roll a... The coin bitterness of poison. Roll a nature check. A nature check?

Yeah, and an Arcana check. Ooh. I'm going to say... I should do it one at a time because I actually know what I'm fucking going here. This is going to be the nature check. That's going to be a... I can do math 13, and this is the Arcana,

and that's going to be a 16. You look down at this flower as your lips detach, and head directly towards the stamens. Or Ricko's bag. But as you're looking at it, it's a beautiful purple that extends towards a soft, like, periwinkle blue. The stamens on the inside are a variety of colors, and you notice that on this one, you've got red, pink, and orange,

but on some of them there are yellows and greens, and every color in the rainbow. They catch the light, and you can see almost like rainbows refracting off of them. off of the different facets of these crystalline stamen. And as you're smelling it, it's a scent unlike anything that you've smelled before. It smells sweet. It smells almost fruity.

And as you look closer at the stamen, you realize that they're pure sugar. But there is an aura of magic. about them. You can tell that there is something there's something magical about this. There's something magical about these flowers. They smell like raw sugar. I don't think the horse speaks horse. He seems to be ignoring you for some reason, Bricko. He taps twice for now. Every time he mentioned ignoring,

he taps twice for now. He doesn't seem to be ignoring you. Assuming he understands common. I have a hypothesis. I don't think this horse is really a horse. It taps once. Oh. Of course, of course. So the question is, is it a shape shifted monstrosity,

or perhaps it is a fake creature, which I don't think I can top two. Oh, maybe it wants you to eat the name. It taps twice. Oh, so you're not a fake creature. One tap twice for, oh, sorry, once for fake creature. If I eat this, if I eat this, as well be transformed into a pony?

He taps twice for no. Is there a difference between a pony and a horse, Gregom? Yes, Tobik. What's the difference? Well, okay, a horse. What are you gonna think, get here? No, I want to hear what Grigard is. Okay, we'll come back.

Yeah, no, don't make me. Okay, yeah. A horse is a horse. Uh-huh. Of course, of course. Oh. Someone about ponies. A pony is a hyperfixation of a suspiciously obsessed middle-aged man like me,

mate Neil. You lost Dormann. Tormack ponies are often distinguished by their feet. Neil's mom lost Neil to the ponies as well. Oh, my goodness. Full-sized horses may sometimes be called a pony as a term of a neerman. Yeah. Does that explain?

Does it explain? Of course. Okay, great. I mean, you're just speaking plain common. It's not, it's not, this is a fake creature, a fake pony that what looks like a pony. I'll pluck one of the sugar stamens, and I will pop it into my mouth. It is. It is. Tour back things deep down, we all knew that Frost was a freak.

Wow. But now he's brewed it. Wow. I know, Gibb. I'm curious. I'm curious. It's thrumming was magic. I'm gonna pop this stamen into my mouth.

It's thrombing all right. I definitely think he's trying to sleep with another animal, too. I mean, according to the Oxford Diction as the stamen is the male foot as an organ of a flower. Can you please roll a D8 for me? A D8?

Yes, please. Yeah. Oh, I'd be happy to. That's the cast. Oh, I'm sorry, what's your question? What's your question? Stamen deep and falling out of my head. This is crazy.

Pallanella does love a good statement. Oh, you take three. This part is full of freaks. One. Thank you. Oh, good. Good. You begin to, you place the statement in your mouth,

and your taste buds are roused. This is full of truth. I don't enjoy it so much, man. Are enveloped in pure sweetenely. Pure sweetness. This is sugar on sugar on sugar. You feel yourself feeling incredibly energized. You're not sure how long this lasts,

but for the foreseeable future, you are under the effects of the hay spell. Whoa! You feel this incredible sugar rush, and it is almost overwhelming. And that's all that you can tell right now. Wow, this is very... But when you speak, you immediately notice

the voice that comes out of Frost's mouth is not the voice that you recognize. It is still Frost's voice, but now it is tinged with a French accent. Guys, this is so sweet. I feel energized. You have to try this statement. What are you doing, Frog?

What are you talking like that? I'm just trying to describe the delicious flowers. You gotta try this. I'm feeling so pumped up. Why do you have such an outrageous franchise accent? Yeah. That's offensive, for all. Yeah, I mean, I don't think you can do that.

I think it might have to do the magic in the power. You have to drive this. Well, now you're doing a little artist's yours thing. I think it's a little in the house. We have to get out of you. Oh, Frost. We told you not to eat that. God, I'm serious.

This flower is so good. The last guy knew to talk like that got on the Greyhound and never came back. Oh, man. Really? Oh, yeah. We never saw on the Greyhound. It came down. That was something nasty.

I don't know if I could run a Greyhound. He's blue half his face off. You're talking about the chef? Your name is now Lefrost. Oh, that guy? Oh, at the cooking show. Oh, he's talking about here. No, that's not.

Oh, he's dead there at this point. There's no way that guy survived that kind of wound. This was an old gambler back in Agway. I'm pacing around the... You're going incredibly quickly. I'm just like walking back and forth. My mind is going a million miles a second. I'm muttering to myself in an extremely accurate French accent.

Extremely accurate French accent. Extremely accurate. You watch as Frost begins to pace around this, the horse, the pony. Now that you have partaken in these flowers, the pony seems to once again be back to just eating whatever it can find along the edges of the pond. It seems happy and content. You can feel that there's a kinship between the two of you. It trusts you, but it is no longer begging for your attention.

You all have to try this. It's a dressflower. You'll eat it. Igitya. Sure I think Stervick's going to pass. How come was the pony eating this thing? Well, how come it's not speaking French? The pony didn't eat any of it.

Because it didn't eat. Oh, boy. You still want any rock candy pony? Are you good with black grass? The moment you say that, it picks its head up and it looks towards you. Its ears are at attention. and if it could be giving you a pony dog eyes, it would be.

It desperately wants the rock candy. Well, I found off with her. I mean, Bricko hasn't now, but I mean. Well, if you don't want to part with your rock candy, Dorebeck has licorice. Oh, they buy some Roslickie. As you motioned to Grico, the pony makes his way over timidly towards you

and looks up. He nudges at your hand, well, actually you'd be eye to eye, nudges your hand with his muzzle and attempts to take the rock candy from your hand. Buh. How about this, toolback? Once he's done with the candy, you can eat the stick. Yes.

A horse. Thanks, Mr. Grummi. Horts to make you equations. We're not a little bit of a stick, that's mine. You hand out the rock candy. It eats the rock candy whole, stick and all. Yeah. Oh!

Yeah! And, um. Wow. Well, can win them all. Pants win them all. Oh, look, he likes it. I don't know he likes it.

And as it finishes, as the pony finishes, chomping down, a splinters of wood, you see just being smashed beneath his teeth. But as he's finished, he reaches out and grabs. part of your vest and begins to pull you towards the flowers as well. Leading you gently, anytime you give resistance,

he stops, but anytime you're willing to let him lead you, he pulls you towards the waterfall, and then he reaches one of his hooves up and leans a flower towards you. What is this? That's out of that stamen. Are you pulling a flower down off of the? Yeah, reaching out of the flower.

Oh, you are able to pull a flower off of the vine. And you see that this one is, once again, it's beautiful purple into periwingle blue, and inside the statements on this one are blue, green, and yellow. I feel like we, in order to pass this trial of this quest, which now is my thing to give things moving, and no more bates. And also, Cramie and Gideon are about to have a serious conversation,

just like your favorite, angst fit. Oh yeah, I should address that. Can you roll a D8 for me please? Re-roll if you get a one. Feels like a month ago, kid. Tony, you just made a short list after much. You have to try it. Six.

Okay. You immediately feel the sugar hit your taste buds. It looks like the world has slowed down around you, but to everyone else, you look like you are zooming through this oasis as you are hit with haste. You don't know how long this is going to last, but you are undergoing an incredible sugar rush. As you begin to speak, that is what you think you sound like,

but everyone else hears a Scottish accent coming from your, from your mouth. I never knew. I never knew. Grigo, you sound different, why? Why? Also, I could go 240 feet with one action. Only 24 meters.

Oh, boy, are we doing this? Well, I think, you know, I mean, that's like we always say. Frost, can you rule a D20 for me? A D20? Yeah. Oh, I guess I will try anything more. You, as he, as Grico says this, you're immediately hit with a wave of a wave of a.

exhaustion. You have one level of exhaustion. You still feel your blood pumping, your heart racing. You still feel like you go 240 feet where you feel like you want to. But your body doesn't align with what your mind is telling you you can do and you feel sluggish. But you still feel like you are under the effects of a sugar rush. So am I physically slowing down? You are physically slowing down, but your mind feels like you could do anything that you want.

A minute, okay. Yeah. It's a rush. It's so much. You are. What's going on? To toss. You do that trouble.

Well, I guess it's time to get a board. I'm so sorry for our French viewers. I think it's time to get aboard the flower pony dust train, right? I don't know. Frost is already looking like. shit I mean that come down looks pretty pretty tough day yeah he spent yeah oh wins well girls is great man I mean it looks like the hos are pretty high if I had to say

they can only say like three different catchphrases did anyone just like knocking on the front door of the house that pony's running around man he's running out flattlers he's a tongue the money's a lot of Torbett. A wee shite. Oh, man. Are you, we shite? Oh.

All right, flowers for everybody, guys. The pony, Torbeck, you notice the pony is just drinking water. I'll save mine. I'm gonna put that, hold on just a minute. Suit jacket. Wins. Okay, all right. Wins of all things.

Pony, I know. Torbeck, no. that we got off on the wrong foot. But Torbeck is going to approach you slowly in a non-threatening manner. Is that cool pony? The pony looks up at you. It doesn't seem like a mean pony at all.

It looks up at you and he, he, um. What does three knocks me? Oh, Torbeck's me. He takes off his pony hands and pulls out a knife. What the hell? Who's there? He takes off his hooves and they're now hands there where his hooves should have been.

But no, he doesn't seem threatening at all. He looks up at you, his eyes wide. He looks like he is hoping for some more treats. Does anyone live in the little house on your bank? He knocks once. Is anyone in there right now? He knocks once. Can Torbeck knock on the front door?

He knocks once. Okay, Pony, don't freak out. Torbeck's gonna get a little, I get 10 feet away. and I try to knock on the ground. Yeah, you get 10 feet away and you, the pony, it's horrifying. That's horrifying.

But the pony doesn't seem to be horrified by it. He continues to lap up water and chew at the vegetation on the ground as you reach forward and you use your incredibly long spindly fingers to wrap a couple of times on the door. You immediately hear shuffling coming from the inside. You see lantern light flicker on in the front room of this abode. And slowly the door creaks open.

And you see a little old Brigha Nock in a fuzzy robe, a nightcap on and a steaming mug of Hot Jones in his hands. As he looks out. Tormack is out here. Tormack is sorry to disturb you. Where are you? Coming to the light.

And he reaches up and you watch us, he lights the fire on the porch. And the entire porch is a little. illuminated with four flickering lanterns. Doorback is 10 feet away, 10 humanoid feet away. Duremberg is coming closer, don't panic. Well, climb up the ladder and come inside. No, Torbeck's too big for that.

Chorpeck will crush the pony. Climb up the ladder and come inside. No, Torbeck is gonna, and I'm gonna like lean closer to the. Yeah, no, it's okay. Then most people do that. That's fine. I, Torbeck's name is Torbeck.

Turn around and face me, you Kerr. This is my. my face. Oh. This is Dorebeck's face. Let me put my glasses on. Okay. Here comes those trees.

What's his glasses on? Uh, you do got some Oz in there. Yeah. What's your name? Oh, bud, what's your name? Hey, we're looking for you guys. This is all that. Oh, Greg or whatever his name is.

Yeah, yeah. It's him. He steps, he steps it. He steps out onto the porch. He's not wearing any shoes. He's got incredibly long rat feet. As he steps out onto the porch, he looks around. You've got an entire group of people out here.

Well, climb up the ladder and come inside. We, ah. Doorback can't stress us enough. Doorback's like eight feet tall. I think I know where he's getting at. We can't. And I like grab the little ladder. We can't.

And as you, as you begin to move your fingers up, you feel your body begin to get smaller and smaller. I don't ever fake trick at this point. Until you eventually. Wrong time since 2017. You feel your body shrink and you're able to climb up the ladder. You find yourself standing in front of Obit on the porch. You tower over him.

He's a wizened old Brighanock and he's hunched over as he looks up at you. Oh, this joke, it's lovely. What? Oh, oh, oh, oh, my jazz. Yes, what sort of fabric do you? What is this made of? Well, it's, uh... It's good, may I touch?

Please, please go on. Huh? It's very soft. Well, I appreciate that. Thank you, young man. You're incredibly well dressed. Well, what to do there? The name's Kremlin Kru.

It's a pleasure to meet you there, old... Oh, the name is Obed. Obed. Obed of the Oasis. It's lovely to meet you. Is this the Oasis for you? This is my grotto. But not the oasis?

Well, yes. Oh, this is oasis? Yes. Well, that's what I call it. Open's Oasis, because it's 1-0 on Obed and then 1-0 on Oasis. Oh, it's like an alliteration? Yeah.

Yeah, all right there. Would you like some hot Jones? Oh, you got that here? Yes. Hey, Grico, they got hot Jones. Rids. Oh, can I have you roll a D20 for me, please? All right, fellas.

Grammy, what happens when you throw the hot Jones down the ladder? Do we get a normal size Jones? Yeah, no, 14's good. You still feel, you still feel like you have full energy. You can move a million miles an hour, Grico. But the rest of you, I mean, is everybody climbing up the ladder? You all begin to climb the ladder and similar to what happened to Cremie, you shrink down to size.

and you find yourselves brigh-a-knock-sized as you all find yourselves on this rickety wooden porch. As you step across it, you can hear the creaking of its movement as the horse leans down and does things. The entire house creaks behind you. But as you look into it from the window, you see that everything inside seems to withstand the movement of this pony, even the fright that was given it. None of the furniture on the inside seems to look disturbed. And it's nailed down. It just like magically or somehow.

It just seems like it's perfectly, it is designed to be atop this pony's back. And in doing so, it is undisturbed by its movements. As Obud ushers you into the house, you are immediately met with the soft warmth of hearth light. And you see that there are plush couches. There's a small reading nook filled with different Brigh-a-knock-themed books. Brigg-a-knock jokes is one that's laying out on the coffee table.

He was most likely reading before you knock-knocked on his front door. And he motions for you to take a seat in front of the hearth and make yourselves at home as he makes his way into the kitchen to procure a large pot of Hot Jones. You hear the screaming of the Jones as they're thrown into the grinder. But- But-

Oh, wait. How many times he doesn't do this? I just love it. I just love it. I can't stop. Guys, I'm worried about Hot Jones. Hot Jones. Oh, John.

Oh, Jones. You are all the Jones. And after he's, so you find yourselves in this living space. Well, he's off, quining the screams of the Hot Jones. And you feel that you have a little bit of time to communicate with each other while you wait for him to bring you the pot of freshly brewed Hot Jones. It's been so long since we've had our tones. HAL OF PONSTABETH DORBEC would like to confess something

I mean, we used to just eat them old They grind them up here, you know Torbeck does not like Hot Jones It freaks Dorebeck out Feelew it out! Torbeck was just pretending to like Hot Jones because you guys seem like you like it so much I never knew!

I mean, they're pretty good. I like the springfield. on it. It's hard for Torback to get over the screaming. I like it when they wriggle on the way down. What happens to them in the blender then? Well, we don't always blend them. We eat hot, tones whole. Oh, all right. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. I wonder what was with all those drug flowers. outside and we can just walk any of it. Yeah, oh, make mine a double, by the way, walking around. Yes, well, I'm in here brewing. Yeah, I'll take a double too. Don't forget the whipped cream and sprinkles. Yeah, same for me.

You gotta have a cream and sprinkles, or it ain't a God Jones. Would anyone like a slice of Beaselberry pie? Oh. Oh, yeah, why didn't you say so? We'll have five. Culman's dumb. Piping hot slices of pebble, Beaselberry pie Alamode for my new friends.

Oh, Alamode. Well, well, well. Shooks Harry. And he continues about in the kitchen. About five or so minutes pass before he makes his way back out to the living room or to this living area. And he sets down a large pot of Hot Jones, steaming coffee mugs placed in front of each of you,

all of them with a dusting of sprinkles and whipped cream, as well as large slices of piping hot beaselberry pie, a dollop of ice cream on top of each of them. Are pipes thrum with heat? Shut up! I'll brand you next! I got a bad batch. Bad batch of Beezleberries?

Jones. Oh. Thank you for your hospitality. You're welcome. Thank you for feeding the pony. I did what I could. He seemed hungry. Now hold on.

The pony just loves treats and snacks. Don't care? What the fucking talking about, Brick-o? Obed. Funer! Obed! Is this safety drinks? Yes, it's hot drones.

It's incredibly hot. It burns your tongue. You get that classic. Oh, I should have, I should have. Yeah, I should have waited for a little bit. But, yeah, it's still very good. Well, Obed, I really appreciate your hospitality, but we should really get down the brass tacks, all right?

Yes. What could I do for you? I'm assuming the rest of the Brighenhock sent you if you made your way here. They did. First, I gotta apologize if I stink a mackle. Second. I'm sorry, what?

What's a stink a mackerel? Oh, well, but maybe I don't need to do. 23 meters. Oh, no. I hate to interrupt you, but. You keep your boots on. I know that your name is Grimmis, but I don't know the names of everyone else here.

Well, introduce yourself, lads. I am called the moment you go to speak, you've had some of the Hot Jones, and you feel your voice come back out the way it was meant to. It's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Morning Frost. Oh, it's lovely to meet you, Morning Paws. Morning Frost?

Yes. Donkey. Highlighten, nice to meet you, too, Donkey. Torvex's name is Torback, but you already know that. Oh, yes, Torvacks. It's good to see you. Well, hey there, the name's Gideon. Okay.

It's Gideon. Gidey up. No, we don't want the pony to do that. Well, that's pretty lame. Wait, what? Plattie Pote like to Gitty up. Well, that's true. That says, it's a great name, though.

I'm sure he would love it. Well, Giddy up. Giddy on. Oh. Giddy on. You actually get it on. If you want to get it on, you Man.

Okay, well. See giddy on my up and Tim, she, I met. I'm not sure what that means. Yeah, you wouldn't. You don't look like you would. Okay, we have a quest, and we need to get down to brass tacks because there are people impatiently reading. So we got to get all of this.

Yes. We need our wishes back, and we need to get to... We got to get into Motherhorn. Motherhorn. I can... I can give you your wife. wishes back. You fed the pony, and that's a very kind thing to do. You fed the pony twice. What? I also ate one of the flowers that the pony indicated I should consume.

Oh, my apologies. And he did it like a greedy pig. I'm sorry I couldn't hear you over my root friends. Greenville is half big. I even look the petals. Oh my jeez. Give it a break, man. I was curious. To be they're quite succulent. Keep it in game, Archie. I always like that, Burdow.

Oh, boy. I said my apologies. You will suffer for that for days. For eating the flour? Yes. What do you mean? Quite the sugar rush. Triple the crash.

Triple. Yes. I was able to move 240 feet in one action. I don't know. Triple. Will I be able to move? Will I be able to adventure?

We have a quest as my friends as much. Are you familiar with arthritis? I know what it is. I've never had it. Oh, you do now. It takes one mistake. I wondered why my hips felt so dry.

Just like that soup, man. Oh, soup. Oh, I love soup. Dry soup? Would you, I've never had it? Would you like to stay for dinner? Well, I guess we're not all the time. The world, does.

You've served as pie and Hodgeones. It's very generous. I have rooms upstairs. You're welcome to stay in for the night. Well, I mean, you have board games? I mean, what are we doing for fun? Oh, well, I only have loop and chewing. Well, we're in.

We're in. Oh, we're in. Frosts it's out. It's only the five-player version. Five-player version. Oh, Frosts it's out. So I'm in. I'm in.

Tormax, I'll play. Oh, that's five of us right there. Oh, I'm all over a chicky nando's chicken brand. Yeah. When the crub delivers it, he's gonna bring in Frosty's. Oh, can you get, can you get me that sense? sandwich on the garlic bread. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Only the coupons are like that. I love some cheeky nandoes. And it's fine if they forget Frost to order. He's full off a stave. No, Frost can get his extremely manly pleas. You like the mushy pease. Oh, well, oh, yes. You wanted your wishes back.

Oh, yes. You know what? Okay, two, that's perfectly fine. Let me one moment, please. Then did you say something about going into Motherhorn? Yeah, well, we weren't realized y'all weren't like evil minions of the hag. We figured we could ally together. We could go in and, you know, take care of business.

The feeding of the pony is enough to warrant your wishes. But to gain access to Motherhorn would require a bit more of an offering. To the pony? To me. Oh. What are you in need of? Perhaps we can help you right now. What do you mean?

I have a variety of things. I have a bell. There's a bell on the mantelpiece. He already has a bell. Maybe like playing a tune. You have a mirror? There's a mirror in the lavatory upstairs. Right next to the talk.

Toilet. I mean, well. Yeah, we, we can pay for your Nandoes. Oh, no, that's okay. I have a subscription to the Grubhub. Oh. Oh.

Well, maybe you're covered there. No delivery fees? No. They'll be just charging more on the items. Sometimes the grub spits in my soup. Yeah, they do that. You have to pay more for that. No, he definitely pays extra.

He definitely checks. That's the flat. Flat on. Subsubs. It's weird. They say the Grub comes here every single day. They know me by name. No, this is a nightmare. My bummer.

Oh, gosh. Can you roll another D20 for me? And Michael, you as well. 19. Okay, fancy. Your bones hurt, you're not feeling any different than you've been. 15. Oh, your bones begin to hurt.

Oh. All I can say is she grub on me hubble until I meant, Duh! Ah! Oh, me these! Oh, God. Well, I mean, Torebeck could spit in your hot nose. Who's DORVAT?

Your Torback'll do it for free! Oh, Doorks! You want to do that for me? No, we'll do it for free. He'll do it if you tell us where Matterhorn is. We want the other hand. Oh, yes. Sorry, Dormack will not spit your hot Jones

and change all Dormack had a... I wish that we're gonna be enough. Wait, what we want us to all spitz it? You want all five of spitting your hot Jones and sick free? What's not good enough? I'm more than happy to offer a spittle in the drink. You need a six person spit.

Excuse me, excuse me. You need a six person spitting like a smorgish board of, Fixes right out. He's definitely sitting in a loop of he crosses his leg and he takes a sip of his hot Jones. Well, see if I try to help you yet. Always ungrateful lately. Right, Paulinella.

What else do you want Torbeck to do your Hot Jones to get the information? Well, nothing. Nothing. Are you sure? What do you want, man? What do you mean? Spin it out.

What do you want? Well, if you're asking what I want, What I want. We are. We are. We have a problem that O-Bid has not been able to solve for many a year. Okay. Oh, I know way this is good.

The Corvids! Oh, I think Coins fucking son. No, no, no, no, they're cool. They're chewed. Oh, that's right. You see that he begins to start moving away. The corns are evil. They're in line with-

No, Corvids are awesome. What is you here? What did you hear earlier? Oh, God. Look at the color and the consistency. Oh, it's so weak. That's the C-O-P-G. You can see the grub.

You can see the grub. Oh, jeez. Oh, the C-O-P-G. Oh, it's so weak. Oh, the, oh, I'm getting old. I will die soon. Oh, yes. Why are he telling us there?

And before I go to the grotto over the bridge, I would like to see. You hit the grotto over the bridge. Oh, no. What we're talking about like a greater grand a dog? Guys, shut out, he's dying. Over a bigger bridge? It's just a kidney stone.

You want us to come back? This is like a bad time. Oh yeah, that was a bad scene with I was wearing you. I'll think about that at least. Is it a kidney wish stone or just a normal type? Oh, it's a kidney wish. I wish I didn't have the skinny stone.

I had a bad wish a couple of weeks ago. It's peeking its way out. Oh, you probably are grinding your Joneses finally. Yeah, I set my Jones down. You can probably find you a grander. Would that be a good enough offer? No, I need to save my brethren. Oh.

I need to save my brethren. save the other brigadawks from the tyranny of the corids no no no they're totally fine he's basically the king of the corids i mean one of you is i forget who it was me because it was the you can procure a who can procure a truce between the brigadocks and the corids before my imminent death basically you can die pretty much right away if you wanted to yeah really you want to go no no no he's got about the interest of mother wrong is right You can just die. There goes the kidney stone.

It's like the material from the final benefit of going down the stairs. Oh my God, that's horrific. I don't know what happened there. You're going to be all right, you're going to be okay. There's still so much. information we need to learn from you. God, I've got all, I've got the rest

of my life. Yes, yes, we also have the rest of your life. Please, please tell us the entrance to Motherhorn. All right, well, let me go get your wishes. Oh, that would be fantastic. And he turns around and he slowly, very slowly, starts to walk towards the door.

Well, as he gets to the door, he turns around. You're going to go into Motherhorn. Okay. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yep, going into Motherhorn, that. That's right.

Through these, through these here minds. Where did I put that entrance to Mother Horn? Oh, if you're gonna go into Motherhorn, it's important to know that of Bitter End. Yep, and Lynn Moongrave. Yes, yes, Bitter End. Yeah, Bitter End. Yes, what about her?

Well, I mean, she like rules for her roost and mother all right. She is the wicked, wicked patron of the theater. Yes, yes. So you better be prepared to perform. Oh. The Torvax has been describing perhaps a comment. The tunnel that is going to lead you there will deposit you directly into the prop room,

which is frequented by her stage hand. Stage hand. Just singular, just one stage hand. He will find you and expect you to have a performance ready. I'm gonna go get your wishes, and in the meantime, make a plan or die? Or die? Uh-oh.

Oh. I think it passed. Do, do, do. It's like one of those little bouncing, like, multicolored stars at Mario. Just, like, zooming around the room. I think he was going to say, don't. Make a plan or don't. I don't think he was going to say, die.

And he shuts the door and leaves. You can hear, even off in the distance, him rustling around in one of the barrels looking for your wishes. You don't angry, go? Oh, no. Yeah. Got me this one of something.

Yeah. What? What is it? Bitter end. More like bitter rear end. Oh. Oh. Yeah.

Oh. Yeah, I mean, yeah, that's fine. Not like a bit of rear end. I'll write it down. Yeah. Maybe save that one in person, you know. Perhaps we can include it in the comedy show. Yeah.

Well, we'll workshop it. Torbeck's not entirely. We'll figure it out. Well, if we got to perform, what are we thinking? Just, you know, the usual routine. Do you hear a tale of wiggle walk again? Oh, we do. What I will say is there are some things that you do remember,

because you have been told something similar from the, from the little, I think it was the little goblin child that told you about what to expect. Or no, it was the, it was the peritans. It was the peritans that gave you the additional information. Mudge told us all the secrets. But only you and in private. But you were told that you would need a troop name. That was what was most important.

Most likely they were going to provide you the material to perform, but you needed to be prepared to perform it as a troop. And that if given the opportunity to perform an encore, that would be of your choosing, but that it couldn't be something you've done before, and that Bitter End is very aware of the things that go on in the other areas, the other domains within Prismere, and that she would know if you were performing a repeat or rerun. And it would be seen as incredibly disrespectful.

Well, we could always stream, or we could always perform the aristocrats, but we wouldn't be able to stream it. Ross, that's crazy. That's crazy, Frost. Wow. Wow, that's crazy. Oh, we could do reacts. We could do reacts. That's all that's pretty good.

Wow. Oh man When Figuos had all that stuff That's crazy That's crazy Okay So we gotta come up with a new

A new plan Yeah I mean we've known about this For days Greco So we'll show us what you got so far This podcast Is brought to you by our Patreon Become a patron today At patreon.com

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I think we start. And it's just me on the stage. All right. I'm on a very high platform so everyone thinks I'm like very tall and I'll say go up there and I'm like be the real man he was better this time yeah it's funny he's gonna laugh and laugh and laugh it's funny your way it's the jokes growing on and then I'll do this that's pretty impressive I gotta take some time to workshop it. You know, I was gonna workshop it,

but then we played like loop and chewy until like, like five in the morning. It's hard to stop. You played it. Yeah, once a year going. You play it. You just loops and loops. Yeah.

So I just, we gotta work on something. Yeah. And we'll need a name. Ooh, the mama's Foss is almost done so that my son is her. The Mummer Farth isn't a bad troop name. Ooh. Well, then we just free a bunch of things. your mummers?

Yeah. Mumblers. Was it mumblers or mummers? Well, I know they're mumblers. One of them was a mumbler. One of them wasn't. One of them was a scream. That's true.

That's true. That was bizarre. Well, I mean, we could just stick with the old carnival of the crew unless we feel like we're trying to hire a guy. No! Will that count as a repeat? Well, it says the same name, right?

Carnival group did the same fucking thing. Well, no, I mean, you know, if we want to kind of gain some notoriety as us, this is our second big show. Really, third, if you count the fucking big top. I do. Dormack's in. Dormac thinks we should use that as our names. It's perfect.

Wait, what is it? Carnival. A group, man. Wow, yeah, yeah. It's like your whole life. It's been like a fucking decade, Rico. Yeah. You forgot?

Man, has it? I work here for 10 years. Yeah. Man. Wow. You've had this fulfilling form of employment for 10 whole years, you know, I always told me mom that was going to grow up to be a great famous musician. And then we all ended up as a bunch of colonies.

Yeah. No, we're entrepreneurs. That's what you should tell her. Tell her you went in a... And she's... Then she'll say, oh, Bricko, what kind of entrepreneur you is? And I'll say, oh, me, Mom, I got my own little beastie show at the carnival. And say, oh, Grico, you're a corny again.

And I'll say, hey, Mom, it only happened a couple of times. I'm not always a colony. And she's going to say, it feels like it keeps happening. You're always a colony. Is that what your mom sounds like? And I'll say, and say, oh, and you don't give me grandchildren. I'll catch death. And I'll say,

Mom, I'll just haven't met anybody yet. And she'll say, Gregor, I need grandchildren. It's the only way I can feel fulfilled. And I'll say, that's, I mean, that's pretty deep. We shouldn't unpack that, Mum. Yeah, it's surprisingly lucid. I feel like it's quite common.

All the ladies in my book club agree. And I'll say, oh, gosh, Mom, that's a little grim now that you say it. Oh, my name is, uh, Muddy Grim, Grim. And then she goes off and cries for a while. How many times you had this exact conversation? Oh, a couple dozen times. Wow.

I'm just happy to know she's in your life. I thought Uncle Glorba raised you. Oh no, Uncle Glorba was around in law. He didn't raise me. Gosh, he couldn't raise nobody. I mean, he always said, oh, Grigo! I don't got no children at least what I know about or what they can prove. Man, I wish I'm having him, bro. Oh, you had a lot, he liked Uncle Globo.

Oh, man. Cape rains nothing but the sheet in the morning, you know what I mean? Uncle Globo used to say that, too. Uncle Globo used to say that, too, when he made his, right before he made his, infamous Uncle Globo stew. What's in that? I don't know.

I was surprised. It's a mystery. It's a surprise. It's a surprise. It's at this time that you hear movement on the top floor of the house. And then you hear a voice called down from upstairs. Obud, I'm getting ready to go to Motherhorn. Do you mind if I grab some hot Jones before I go?

Obed? Obed? He's not down here. We're visiting. Who is that? What have you done with Obed? We haven't done anything. but we're guests in this home.

We're here to steal all your... You're Joe's. I ain't hurt open. I get a... No, no, no. Just kidding. He's just out of the road. He's collecting some dreams.

You notice movement on the stairs. And it would have, if you weren't feeling so sugar rushed, you wouldn't have noticed that it was simply a distraction as movement on the ceiling above you catches your eye and you see what looks like a shadow at first before you realize that pressed into the ceiling in a tight, dark purple acrobatic suit is an elf. And she is pressed up against the ceiling throwing her voice to the stairs. You saw the movement of her almost spider-like skittering across the ceiling. But you immediately notice her behind you, you're still

facing the stairwell as you talk to her. She doesn't seem to notice that you've noticed her actual location. Hobud is retrieving wish zones for us, and we're doing them a favor. What kind of favor? We're helping them out. Why don't you reveal yourselves and come down?

We can introduce ourselves. Roll a persuasion check. Another 19. I will get 21. Go ahead. You got a 19? I got a 21. Oh, that's pretty good.

You immediately hear the sound of her feet land lightly behind you. Back here. Fuck! Whoa! That keeps happening to you! You're coming down the stairs! What the hell?

I could destroy my voice. That was a remarkable talent, both your ability to move and you... You immediately... Immediately, I'll let you keep that role. You immediately notice that she does not have a shadow. As she begins to move this way and that and the light hits her, there is no shadow reflected behind her on the wall.

If I might venture a guess, is your name Gleam perchance? How do you? How do you? Oh my gosh, it's under you! And she rushes over and she throws her arms around him. Oh, and Polonella! And she like rubs against like gently scratches beneath Polinella's wings.

You did lie to you. lie, did you, buddy? You said you would find me. Well, I did say I would find you once I had rescued Polonella from that Cyclops. What are you doing back here? You're supposed to be escaping. Yes. I am supposed to be escaping, but I received a letter, and I have reason to believe that it is from bitter end, but it is addressed as my sister. I know that something is happening up there in that horrific place. And as much as I want to run and trust that she'll find me, I can't leave her in there.

I've got to go back. So Obed has offered to let me... I fed the pony, so he's offered to let me make my way into Motherhorn. And I'm going to save her. That's chance would have it. That's exactly where we're headed. Oh, really? Hey, are you trying to kill Bitter-in, too?

Well, I'm trying to rescue my sister, but if her death comes at the cost of rescuing my... Yes, yes, I would love to kill her. We're going to try, I mean, I'll attract her if it isn't the best in terms of killing ass. No, but... We're kind of like just kicked the hag down the road, you know what I mean? If only.

She's wicked, truly, truly wicked. Oh. Well, what kind of carnival skills do you have? Because you've got to join the show at first. Well, some kind of fucking acrobat. What can't I do? I can juggle. That's what I was asking. I do the trapeze. I am a silk dancer. I am a condortionist.

You'll fit right in. Welcome to carnival of the crew. Is that your name? Your true name? That's our humble carnival. That's exactly right. Yeah, we've all worked there in the same roles for 10 years. No, what do you do? Making the same wages. Why to do the name is criminal crew, ringleader right here is the strong man Gideon. She vaults over your arm,

bends completely backwards, and steps one leg over her torso after the other and then writes herself and shakes your hand. The mind-bending mentalist, morning frost, the one-in-of-a-kind beast and monster Tame of Grico, and Torbeck's the geek. What? I thought Torbiz was...

Oh. All right. What does that mean, Mr. Cremie? I don't know if you think back to the fuzzy days of memory where you would wake up covering the chicken feathers and blood. Yeah. Yeah, well, that's what a geek does. They wake up craving something specific and itching to bite the head off of chicken. I see it now that you've mentioned.

I see it, yes. Hello. And it's a pleasure to meet you. It's inside of her mind as I use my mentalistic toilet. Hello, it's a pleasure to meet you too. So you throw your voice as well. I throw my voice into the minds of others.

We'd like to see what else you can do. Not in a weird, like, sex way. Well, I mean, not a weird sex way and suffocating it. Well, no, I mean, not a weird sex way. I mean, she's a contortionist for God's things, but. Look, that has no useful application.

outside of a ring. Oh, of course it does. You try squeezing yourself through tiny spaces. You need something procured from, I'm sorry? He had much too large to be a contortion. Well, I heard that bunch. Those muscles were getting away. Yeah.

Sorry, this lineup joke was just for Mikey. Who's Mikey? Oh, you're rad. He was at the carnival. He has a crudgeoning. I know about Mikey, back in the end. You're a cremate. There's a bit of a greasy.

If you need something, if you need someone to climb into small spaces and unlock doors or steal things, then gleams your girl. You can count on me to do anything. Out of curiosity, your sister. Yes. Lister, I believe her name is. Was she also a contortionist? Oh, no. She can.

It's not a favorite thing to do. We drop the contortionist thing. I mean, we can move on. I'm juggling. Is she also a rogue who is capable of thievery? She's a she's she's she swallows swords Oh Oh

I'm down Yeah Yeah you know Oh Let's go to bed her in Oh man I've never been so down Not even Dormickness that one

We're not just sisters We're tweets She's just so swallowing Get in person to fly Wait ain't nobody swallowing no son That's what you think You should see her She's got the greatest

his throat and all of his wrist. Oh, well, I'd like to see you a try to off her front powers. It's all right. So what I? All right. I believe it. This just got interesting. Get into a lot of money to experience my sister's throat.

How much money? A lot of money. Crumming's got Mr. Crumming has a lot of money. No, I don't. Nope, no, no. This is a... All the money that we do owe to one Mr. Remygaroo, on account being Crummys' old boss in some sort of fine print.

This is a free gradis kind of job with doing the show pro bono, so you won't be paid. You need to look like you're about to pass out. You'll get access to Motherhorn. But you will assist me in rescuing my sister. If you'll join the show, then you can join us, absolutely. All right. Well, bitter end knows me. Do you have a way to disguise my face?

And can you give me a new name? This is a guy. You call me off guard. Yeah. Go on, Ginn. Go on. Getty, do you have an idea? I'll let you end this one.

Yeah, Gideon. It's full of great ideas. No. I didn't know, I didn't know you to be a disguise officer. I didn't know you to be a disguise office. No, I got nothing in line of disguise. You got no way to stay. So I was thinking.

Can you face it all kids? Nothing in mind. I mean, I got a couple ideas. I don't have any idea. No, I got one or two, but I'm not, I think it would be, you know, we'd stop her two. I have a pair of glasses. Do you have an idea?

Oh, well, any time. Spectacles are surprisingly good at hiding. That's incredibly true. Anytime you have a beautiful young woman, if you throw a pair of glasses on her, she becomes hideous. I think that it might actually work. I found that to be the case.

I do have face pain. Oh! Look at how handsome this cat is. Ugh. Repulsive. Absolutely repulsive. We need to give you a makeover. I do have face pain.

That should change your whole get up. I just don't know how long it lasts. If you are making your way into Mother Horn, you're not going in as a call. carnival troop, are you? Well, that was kind of the plan. That was kind of all the crew. It's right there in the man. They said we had to.

If you think that a carnival troop is going to impress bitter end, you're mistaken. What? It's, it's not, it's not anything to do with your line of work. It has to do with, she's a thesbians. What's that supposed to mean? No, we didn't get along with those. We got great along. We got very well along with the mummers.

No. No. Except. do it. Much. Yeah. Much seem fine, you know? Much is definitely a Thespian.

Definitely. No, all they do is they get drunk and then they steal your money to buy more opium. That's all Thespians do. Oh, Thespians. Yeah. They're the same as Mommas.

And jazz musicians. But I... I understand your point, Liam. If we're going to be putting on a show for someone who is passionate about the theater, then they're They're not going to enjoy carnival tricks. They're going to enjoy a drama.

The only thing that can bring bitter end any sort of joy is a tragedy. So we have to be theater kids. Godway babies. A lot of terrible things for money. It's a horrible thing to say to you is I think your names are lovely, but your names will not do. You need the name. of a drama darling, yes, stage names. I don't know how many minutes there are in a year.

That's very funny. Very funny. We gotta give it up for that one. That was very good. A single, very funny, a man. A single, a single teen year old down on a bit. Oh, wow. Oh, but, but, but.

December 25th, 5'n, Eastern Standard Time. Here on N, I shoot without a script. Anyways, I think that we will be able to accomplish this. It will require meticulous, meticulous planning, which we're very good at, so that shouldn't be a problem. Yes, there should be scripts available to choose from. But upon entering Motherhorn, you will be taken to the stage, and your performance will determine whether

Whether you stay or whether you go, the only way to bitter end is through the performance of a lifetime. And if she sees me on stage with you, we will all be in trouble. So my disguise is going to have to be flawless. Our names will have to be unclockwiseable. Oh, they should call us the unclockables or something called. What? Why?

Well, the unclockable. Going to the fear. What about calling ourselves the miserables? That's pretty good. No, it doesn't really feel fit theater now. Well, I would, but no, it's, it's perfect for a tragedy. If we're performing tragedies, calling ourselves the miserable's, just, it really just. Are all the selections tragedies of all the options?

If you try to perform anything else, then- She's like a real depressing fuck. She's awful, she's wicked, she's truly terrible. She's the dame of disdain. Oh. Aim of unhappy endings. The dame of disaster. She's always a dame, huh?

My lady disdain. Oh. Man, she really is a cringy for you in a kid. I think that's a movie fucking sucks. Yeah, oh man, what are we going to do? Well, why don't we think on, I think the miserable's, that's a good style. We can workshop it.

We can workshop. Oh, I got it. What about calm? Carnival Cremant. Huh? Well, I'm thinking Carnival isn't going to work. Oh, oh, oh. What about Cirque du Cremet? Oh, that's really cool.

That's pretty good, man. I don't, well you see? Cirque is really just carnival. Have you ever seen that? Have you ever seen that? Or not a different language. Yeah, it would be very sad. It's inherently pretentious.

We could make it a true tragedy, which is kind of... But it's not a play. Oh, yeah, it's not... Or an opera. Yeah. Gosh. I really want you to succeed because my success requires your success. What's some, like, really cringy production company that someone would make when they're like...

Sony. ...the 17. Sony's a little... Oh, you know, there was a lot of release. Remember when we found curly in the rafters of the haunted house? Oh. He had been rotting for like three weeks. Oh, no longer, man.

Is he related? It was monkey that summer too. Is he a bug bear related to, was it Burley? Oh, no, that's a different curing. No, that's a different curly. No, it's Hurley and Burley. This is Curly. He was a clown.

Yes, Burley, I think his name. Yeah, you know him? Yes. He's one of the stagehands at Motherhorn. Yeah, no, so we had a couple of clowns. All of them died, surprisingly. Clowns! What a brilliant idea! Nobody hates anything more than clowns! I bet, I bet... I just know that Endlin would love a performance done by clowns.

We have a number of sad clown stories. And clowns would be perfect because I could paint my face like a clown and she would never recognize me, not once, not ever. Yeah. I mean, it's a pretty good story. It starts a clown. What? Oh, tears of a clown. It's a thing. riot sadness. Are we doing clowns? No, well...

And we could still be called the miserables, because we'd be miserable clowns. Crummy, I don't think we would have gotten this far in this adventure if it wasn't for clowns. They're very marketable. That's a good point. I mean, it's a good point, but you know, you don't want to get pigeonholed into

just the whole clown thing. I feel like... It's been like several years since the clown thing. I guess you're right from a certain point of view. Anyway, this tale was really sad. Curley, his imagination. She did on him with another clown that we had and then he drank himself to death on wood alcohol in the haunted house Yeah

Well was it on it before he drank himself to death or did he honed it? That seems like the perfect kind of tragedy to perform in front of good end I think it was always a honed house It was always a honoured house. It was just extra home when he wants he had yeah Yeah, how do you know the wood alcohol Torbeck won some? I think that's why you can never find it because Curley was hot and all that Oh, damn it. Yeah. Well, he's dead, too. I think Gibwood used to strip the paint and varnish

off the, you know, painted backdrops, but he would, you know, sneak into the stash and just to drink himself dead. Excuse me. I don't know. I don't know. He stuffed himself behind that. Gideon, are you going to finish your hot Jones?

Do you mind if I just slide in there and finish it down? No, I got stuck, but you could have... You could slide into my little joint. There you go, miss lady. Yours as well? Well, sure. If you want to take two. She takes the second one and she just

swallows them down really quickly, like shots. Oh, you're hungry, girl. Too hot. That's too hot for you. I cast Vortex Warp on. Hey, you're a hungry girl. She gets $2. Two dollars for you.

That's a callback. Two dollars. I forgot about $2. Watch Brian, everybody. Wow, that's a deep, deep cut. Well, we're going to have to come up with, well, I've got your wishes. You're welcome, O'bud.

Oh, O'Bud. I'm so happy to see you. I've just met your new friends. And they have a quick conversation as he pulls in a sack behind him that seems to be filled with wishes. And as he opens it up, I need each of you to roll a D6 for me, please. I don't really remember what wish I could.

A D6? Well, that's gonna be unfortunate. A D6. Five. Torbix more worried that it's not good. Do we re-roll? Oh, shit, you beat me to one. No, no.

Oh, shit. No, you don't re-roll. Okay, so one. Five, five, six, and one one. And then what did you get? Six. Six. You got a one as well.

I did. How do you do six? And then what did you get? Cremie. I got five. Oh, you got a six, not a five. No, no, I got a five. Okay.

you do six with two hands. Okay. You watch as Obid begins to rummage through the sack, pushing some wishes aside and others aside, constantly saying the word two over and over and over in his head. As he reaches out, you, you, I'll do the old ones first.

And he reaches in and he pulls out a wish that is, the stone itself looks to be older. and he hands it to you, Kremi. As you hold it in your hand, you look inside of it and you see that what is inside of this is the image of a unicorn. You immediately think back to the moment you had stepped into the carnival and you had offered up a wish, the wish for a unicorn.

As he begins to hand out the rest to you, all of you have a similar experience. Grico, you look into yours and you see the Ishmael Marsh, Uncle Glorbo's famous Dogwood Sando, stacked meat to cry inside of this. And you remember that moment when that wish was made.

Gideon, inside of yours is a black and red flaming motorcycle. It is... What? It is the sexiest hog you've ever seen. This is the second sexiest hog I've ever seen. It's the fattest hog you've ever seen. This is the second fattest hog I've ever seen.

Torback, you look into yours, you see a bucket of buttery popcorn just spilling over in front of you. To anyone else looking in, it's clearly not popcorn, it's cicada carcasses. Oh, damn it. The little dead bodies of cicadas covered in some kind of grease.

With their wings still attached? With their wings still attached. Crunchy. And Frost, yours is. Yours is a darkened shadow that twists and undulates. Anyone who looks over sees this strange image, but you know exactly what this is and what it means. And you feel safe.

You feel protected. Whoa, Gid, is that the motorcycle from the escapes from Midgoth Seed in Final Fantasy 7? Oh, right. Oh, hell yeah, it is great. Well, oh, you know. It helps like a wolf. That's Wish won for the first treat.

We're just holding stones. You're just holding them. You know if you were to break them, that wish would be granted. But the wish, you immediately see on the plate in front of you where the crumbs of your

Beaselberry pie had been is now the largest Uncle Ishmael Marsh's Dogwood sandwich that you, Dagwood sandwich you've ever had. You've ever seen. Wow. We all see this?

Yeah. That's amazing, Grico! It's just like a go-globo used to make. Look at the two olives that look like the eyeballs on the top. That's amazing. Congratulations. That takes me back. Yes, me old masticold it.

That's a strange name. Where'd that come from? Yeah. They just said it normal like that. It didn't have any kind of thought. Yeah, you should. I was going to throw it to be old masts. that when I came in after he got off a ship

and he was talking all crazy. I think he was a geek from a carnival. I thought alcohol. And I'm not mentionable. I'm like, oh, I have a little shicky boy, hi. I would use my mind powers to lift the wall containing the shadowy veil, and I would send it flying across the room, crashing it over the hearth that I can only be.

for Zoom is in the room and shattering it against the brick. The entire room is engulfed in this dark undulating mist. You hear all noise completely disappear from this space for a moment as if you were pulled into a vacuum and then just as quickly noise erupts around you and you feel cloaked, you feel hidden. I got my wish. It's a little more abstract than a sandwich.

but it was an obfuscation. From what? The psionic order that I have told you about that raised me for the most part. I ran away from them. Now they will never be able to find me. This is a tremendous relief. Obed. Thank you.

Wish I just brought it to you. I find these other ones. On a gourd. What the fuck are you talking about? Yeah. Do we know about that? I don't know. We've only done the guy 10 fucking years. He likes to be honest this at all?

I would assume that Gricka would know that I came from a psionic order in order to drain my power. Oh, you're so lucky. Frosty, this is amazing. This is a huge moment for you. Forget what I said earlier. I know I don't speak about it much, but I... Now you can. They can't find you.

I know that you haven't spoken about it because words have power. And as soon as you mentioned, put it out there, you would manifest them to find you. That's an in-canon diet. Yes, that's exactly right. Well, now you can speak freely. Tell us all about it, Frosty. Yeah, we've got like four hours to kill. Go for it. No, no, no.

And this is that we got to go outside so I can crash my wish, man. Well, I can't open this in here. Look, I think it's important that we talk about it at some point, and now that I'm free to speak it aloud, I would be happy to share more detail. Well, I feel like, you know, it's always useful to have a little bit more time to think about the specific details. I mean, we've only had since 2002 to sort of sort of all this out, but you could always use more, you know? Once three more years. The crucial thing is that my posture has always been that those details of a backstory don't really matter,

and that it's the character that is most important. I don't care about the character, man. I want to hear about your back story. Yeah. I don't know, I'll tell you when we have an opportunity. We have bigger priorities right now. We're a bigger part. We're going to all split this deck with a sandwich. We're going to watch Gideon do some cool figure-8s on its new mode. Oh, I can't wait, man! And then we're gonna play a little bit of Lupin' Chewy. It's five players.

Sorry, uh, Glein, there's only five players, so you, there's not enough room for you, sorry. Sorry. No, that's all right, I'm not sure how to play. And I, am I like watching? I love to watch. Oh, really? Yes.

Well, there's a lot of watching to be done in Lipin' Chewy because there's normally only three players. So oftentimes there's a lot of people watching. There usually is a special chair reserve for people who like to watch Super Chewy. And we always say, hey, get in the Lippon Tuite chair. Is it the Chewy chair? Please get the chewy chair.

I would love to sit the chewy chair. We're so lucky that this version even allows for five players because usually there's just so many chewy chairs. Well, Underpour and I can sit in the chewy chairs. I'm going to throw myself up as fucking cronies. I'm definitely very comfortable in the chewy chair. Oh, 100%. Frost looks like he was made.

for the chewy chair. Frost is also like this I am not and I will throw myself off this fucking pony Frosty the the chewy chair

is quite comfortable and it's placed very conveniently where you can say everything Brad's I can Some would argue it's the best seat

now You said what are you Some of a certain point of view Some certain point of view Yeah I'd much rather be playing Lupin Chewy I'd much rather be playing looping chewing

Yeah, well. All right, well, I'll sit over here in the chewy chair, and when you're ready to play, I'll be ready to watch. But until then, it looks like Obed is still trying to fish out more wishes for you. Oh. Are you going to grab all the wishes we've ever made? Because this could get very weird. You watch as Obed begins to hand out the second wishes.

Frost, you hold this wish. This is very clearly new. This is something. You can see that the gem on this one is pristine. And swirling inside of it is a toilet. That's very funny. Oh, please. I just drop it to the floor and it shatters.

No, come back to me. All of a sudden, the... Doctor toilet? The doctor toilets. You try to remember and you can't, you're losing memories and you, the idea of this talking toilet eventually fades into nothingness and where there had been a talking toilet haunting your life, it's no more. You see that? You see it? My pH.

It was all in my mind. There's a huge swirling. Oh, my gosh. The sky opens. It was like a bloody eclipse. It looks like the sky is flushing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was trying to tell you about the toilet.

There was a truck. Eldridge entity that was haunting me that wanted my poop in his mouth. We're sorry, we didn't believe you. I don't know if I even still believe him now. Eventually, Ovid makes his way towards Grico. And you're looking into this gemstone

and you see what appears to be a mouth laughing. Is this another abstract one? I'll take it. You immediately feel your mouth being to form the words dees nuts. Nothing happened. It must have been a false wish. What do you mean?

Nothing happened. Nothing happened. Okay. Weird, man. You know that could happen. I love that. I'm very excited about it. You had a dud wish, I guess.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. He's always spout. Kremi, you are presented with the second wish. And at this point, you're listening to the things that Oban's saying. And he's providing a wish for each of the times you fed the pony.

So this is the last wish that each of you is getting. As he hands you this stone, you look inside of it, and there is a dark rum bottle. Oh, yeah. another another yep just one of them fake wishes are we supposed to be cracking these or keeping them Torbeck's still got the popcorn bucket here I'm saving mine a full of rainy day

all right well yeah Torbric could save the popcorn I'm saying mine this is we're outside man I just want to get outside and get the fin rear up and run oh you got a cool motor cycle Torbeck's got a bucket of popcorn these seeming balanced well you can go for a ride Torbeck I'll give you a spin you eat the popcorn Thanks. It's so good. Kind of you. Well, you know.

I mean, once we're going, obviously, criminal, right. Oh, fine. Hey, uh, Glein, what's the deal with your whole shadow thing? You know, you're not having one and all. Well, it's not normally a topic for polite conversation, but we're friends here. I mean, I'm sitting in the chewy chair. Has these scissors. They snip your shadow from your body.

Oh? Oh, yeah. She keeps your shadow under her control. Does it hurt? It's physically painful in the moment, and it is mentally and emotionally painful every second going forward. It's something I have to live with every day. Sorry to hear about that.

I will get it back. Yeah, no, we'll find the needle and the thread, and I will sew it back to my body. Let us hope you do not incur her ire and have yours ripped from you. She has a lot of power over you when she controls your shadow. She can use it to manipulate you in your clothes. In our clothes? When you are close.

Oh, she's sick. But yes, in your clothes, when you're close, if that's your sort of thing. Sorry that that happened. We'll do everything that we can. to obfuscate you. Thank you. Of course, that's a weird thing in there. You're into some freaky stuff.

Well, that's true. Let's see. And you hold yours up and you see a tiny version of Torbeck. Oh, yeah. What's in there? Fine. I crack it on the ground. You crack it on the ground, and immediately,

you'd be able to be. you begin, you're almost like in a tunnel of visions as you begin to see flashes of Torbeck's anatomy. As you look at him, you see the way the witchlight is pumping through his body, the way that the tubes on, the canisters on his back continue to move more of the witch light throughout him. You see where the syringes are placed behind his cuticles on his hands. You even see a dark shadow looming over him, almost like an entity clinging to his back. You see all of this flash before you. You realize that's not all.

You look around and you see the clock on the mantelpiece. You almost immediately know exactly how it works. You look around and you see the Hot Jones machine in the other room and you realize that you don't even need schematics. If that were to break, you could figure out how to repair it. And as you look down at the little gemstone in your hand that houses, your new motorcycle. The thing that you wanna do to it, the thing you've always dreamed of,

you know exactly how to do that now. Giddy, what was that? Guys, I know Kung Fu. I mean, look, I'm no engineering. Whoa! Wait a minute, Kitty, isn't that the same thing that happened to your good friend, Philip? Yeah, Philip.

Yeah, Philip. I'm a good friend, Philip? I can't remember. Phil. You can Philip, I. Well, shucks out. little green. Do you feel better?

That felt good. I'm Bradigan. Oh, Rood again. I rip off my shirt. Ah, you really bound up there for a while. I really got that long. He's saying that thing, he always says.

As the toilet rains spilling down, I do a shot of question. Mouth open. That's the slag of the top. Frost use that like some time. I think I, Obed actually may have died. Oh, he's back, he's back. He's back. Oh, my pants out for some reason?

Oh, my pants are warm. Oh, no, wear any pants. Well. Yes, morrobe. Thank you for these stones. You've got kidney-wish stones, too? No, no, just the regular kind. Oh, yes.

Unless these are kidney-wish stones. You're welcome. I don't have any other wishes that we have made over our lifetime or anything along this one of those ones. There are tons over there in the barrels. I walk over to one of the barrels and I look inside. The barrels are outside. Oh. That's weird.

And I stay here because I want to be part of the scene. Frost goes the next hour walking out. He comes down the ladder. I know. I go to the grotto. I go to the barrel. I open it up and I'm just like, oh, there's so many wishes that aren't. Let's see. Big dick. Big dick. Big dick. Big dick. Smaller dick. That would have been Torbex.

Big Dick. That's very funny. Torbeck doesn't want to seem ungrateful, and he already knows the answer to this, but Torbeck only got one. Oh, well, moving on. Yeah, there it is. Okay. Oh, no, this must be for you. Yes!

He reaches out and he hands you a stone. As you look into it, you see that thing that you cover so much. Gideon's dagger spinning on the inside of the stone. No. Torbeck has a question. Yes. What happens if Torbeck made a bad wish? It were a naughty wish.

He was a little naughty. Well, if you were evil, You would have ramifications. All right, all right. You were just a little naughty. Yeah. Then you would just get your wish. Okay.

Do it. Do it. I tuck both of my wishes away. I keep them. Outside, you feel another wish stone break. Do you feel fundamentally changed? I'm not outside. I'm not outside.

that out. Well, thank you for the wishes. This has been most generous and just for feeding a pony. How nice. Oh, pony means a lot to me. It is both friend and home. Friend and is there anything else we should do before you lead us on our way to... Oh, are you going to stay and play a rousing game of loup and chewy with an old man? Oh, didn't we go to... Oh, the crumbs here! Oh, he's here. Wow. That only took us here. Two hours, three. Oh, yes, they're early.

He goes outside. Oh, it's only half wrong. Good job, grub. Spint this? And he brings the bag inside, and it's got everybody's order except for frosts. It's fine, I'll just eat whatever he lay behind. It doesn't matter.

He hands you a sandwich, there's a long curly hair in it. Oh, man. I don't think I'll have much one. I look like a cheat hair. That's definitely a cheat hair. That's definitely a cheat hair. Oh, man. And you all enjoy a nice meal of cheeky nandoes

delivered from the Grubhubhub two hours early. And you enjoy, some of you sit in the, chewy chairs will you guys play rousing games of Lupin Chewy and the night progressives the fuck is it and not an all I finally get to chain I finally get to play my my paddle's not working stop stop the rotation well it's time for bed let's clean up the board okay in the chewy chair I didn't get to play in the chewy chair and as As night progresses, Obed offers to put you up for the night

if you want to sleep upstairs, or you can choose to go on your way. You have a small opportunity, if there's anything else that you feel like you need to do before you head to mother-mhorn. Obit is offered to assist you in any way that he can. As you sit in front of the hearth and enjoy each other's company, you have a small amount of time that you feel like you could chat with him and potentially gain other favors. As the night's winding down, I will excuse myself from Luke and I will take a seat in the chewy chair

and watch my friends as have lots of fun with a hand in my lap. I will, as long as they're all preoccupied, I'm going to like, you're going to, fondle your stone? I'm gonna take one of my stones out and grip it between my index finger and my thumb. And I'll give it a bit of a twist. Oh, golly. I will, I want to sort of like look into the rum bottle one and I want to sort of reflect on what it means and if I get any kind of spooky vibes from it. I would say most of you had forgotten your wishes. You're looking at this and you can't quite remember what it was that you would have wished

that would have this kind of a symbol. But you don't, there's nothing about it that makes you feel unsettled aside from the, aside from the depiction, knowing what this is, who this is, what this means. But it's core to you, core to who you are. So knowing that... But I would say you don't feel... And you can see that this is not one of the... It's not glowing that awful purple.

It doesn't make you feel sick to your stomach. It's clearly not one of the tainted wishes. Okay, so it's not a tainted wish. None of your wishes work. And nothing about the fact that the man that I owe 100,000 gold pieces to shares a patron me. It doesn't really like... No.

rubbed me the wrong way. No. Yeah. Um. Are you going to sound strange. As the game, as their wrist starts to get tired. You hear thwap, thwap, flap, flap. Yeah, there's a lot of slat.

I will pop my stone. You. Right there in a chair. You, you have never, you have never popped a stone so hard. But the noise from loop and chew is so, so loud, it drowns out the sounds of you stoning. Oh, damn it. And you immediately, you are immediately consumed in shadows.

In the glory hall. In the glory hall. I'm taking the club. Come, like this. That's actually what Lupin Jew is in this whole time. It's just a true. It's just a juicy. It's just a joke.

It was really glorious. Wow. references that none of you understand. I'll take references that none of you understand for 500. Do it, do it, Derek. Leveled his laughter I've never heard before. Oh, my bad.

Oh, my bad. You, while all of that happens, they finally get chewy out of the glory hole as everyone erupts in cheers. It's only taken five hours. As you... Just off from the end and return of the Jenner. I'm like...

Start rolling. That's your magic. But this gives me some privacy, because all this commotion. Yes, all of this craziness. And craziness is happening as you break this wish stone and you immediately are consumed by shadows. You hear the sounds of ominous jazz be able to play, but then it twists and it shapes.

and it feels a little bit whimsical as you realize your magic now has an effect on Fay. Oh, fuck yeah. It looks like the Baron has honored you this day. All right, all right, all right. Oh, good job, guys, you did it, you got him out. Oh, that was a fun. He was really hard, Mr. Crick, we did it.

Yeah, he had put him in some hard walk-up looking. Yeah, oh, yeah. Premier, are you gonna finish these Brussels sprouts? All right, I haven't touched any of mine. You can't have mine. That shit's so fucking man. I feel like on the wrong. They smell a mosh.

You take a bite out of one and you realize they're not Brussels sprouts the way that you remember seeing them before. They're bushel sprouts. And as you turn them around, each one of them has a human face. Thank you so much. Please go. I'm hungry. I can't assume that you have sentience right now. Put me down.

Oh, are they bent up? Oh, are they belgings? Help, help, I'm alive, I'm alive. I can feel a lame. Stop! Stop! No different than Hot Jones. Just push through.

No different than eating the goldfish. One of them bites the inside of your lip. Ow, it drops, it rolls, it goes down the ladder, and a massive Russell's brown. It's just lies down the bridge. That's someone else's problem. Oh, I should have called them Russell's round. I've called them Russell sprouts,

and they should have been on Russell. We were changing that. They're Russell sprouts now. Thank you, chat. Thank you, chat. And with that, you are finally able to settle in, enjoy another round of Hot Jones and Russell sprouts as you enjoy your evening.

And you imagine you have a small amount of time before you need to choose whether you're gonna go up to sleep or whether you wanna head straight to Motherhorn. And you imagine you have some time where you could ask another faith or two of Obed if you chose. Do I think if I was okay not getting full long rest, do I think I could go outside and spend like,

I don't know, maybe even the whole night working on the bike? Yeah, you imagine you could. Okay, I would do that. So you guys are making the choice this day. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I would like to work on the bike. Obed makes some beds for you and he lets you know exactly how to get up there, Gleam offers to give you directions up to the room.

as she begins to put his thing, his book away. He was reading Brigha knock-knock jokes to you for the last hour. None of them were funny to anyone but Torback and Frost and Gideon and Grigo. Oh! But you enjoy the night with him and eventually he gets, well, if there's nothing else you need from this old man,

I'm gonna go get some rest. If this is the last time we see you, it's been a pleasure. Well, when I wake up in the morning, I'll open the passageway to Motherhorn. Oh, you have to wake up in the morning to do that. Yes. Oh, okay.

Well, we'll pray for you. We will. And that's the end of the middle. You're just stuffed. Yeah, man, we were stopped. It's time over the pasting, open. Obes, wake up with it, please. Please, we're not.

We need this. We need this, please. No, I hope that you have a good rest. Yes. Enjoy your dreams. Thank you. Thank you for giving us our wishes. Yep.

Thank you for the hot Jones. Anytime. Thank you for feeding my pony. Oh, yes. We will endeavor to feed it on the way out. Oh. I don't really trust it all of that would would the would does the pony like hot Jones no no you don't want to see the pony on hot Jones oh now I kind of want to see the pony on hot

I mean it seems like it would be pretty funny oh the pony it's fucking crazy on hot all right well we're gonna fucking party you know oh Ben watch your language man I am I'm curious he's nice of fucking body all I just got this Pony. No sound apartment in the city. The city of Compton. What?

Clompton. Clompton. In the city of Clopton. City of Clopton. Are you sure we can't do a comedy? Yeah, that's one more thing. Oh. Oh.

Oh. All right, well. I'm going to, I'm not long for this world. So that's certainly for it. Good night. Good night. I'm heading upstairs to bed. Yeah, good night.

Oh, bad. Is there it happen to be a chewy chair in your room? Maybe we should have a watch. Oh, you want to watch me while I sleep? I feel like it's best. Gleam could maybe do it. Yeah, Gleam. Can you watch?

No, no, no, no. The best candidate for this job is Amtivore. He hasn't gotten out of his chair all night. He's sitting over there his legs across. No, no, I couldn't. He adjust himself. I must state. Please stand and join a...

No, I think I... No, it's lovely right here by the fire. I think I shall stay here with Polonella. Where is she? Well, good night, everybody. You freeze. Someone provide me a throw, blanket, please.

I think he's sitting on Paulineau. Oh, black-langer. The gyroscope's working on. What is that incessant vibrating? Oh, geez. Oh, I'm... I don't have to play some loop and chewy, but it looks like everyone's looping-chewed-out.

And you're gonna go to bed. Yeah. Oh, good night, Frost. Oh. I make my way upstairs and I find a- You all, except for Gideon and Omdipur, make your way upstairs. All stay downstairs.

Yeah, you stay downstairs. You make your way to your respective areas of rest. Those of you that go to sleep, go to sleep. Gideon, you spend the majority of your night outside working on your project. you toss the stone, I'm assuming. Oh, yeah. And you watch.

Once you're already out there, I would make two, if I know how to make hot Jones I would make two cups of hot Jones. You make two cups of Hot Jones. Do they get large with me as I climbed down the ladder? Once you climb down the ladder and you begin to become larger, they do enlarger. You turn around and you see that Gideon is next to what looks to be a workstation outside. It is very small. It's still Brigha Knock size,

but Gideon's doing what he can with the tools that are provided him there. But he is working away at what is this pristine motorcycle. You watch as he wipes the sweat from his brow as a very small forge is roaring with fire. The pony is curled up next to it. The house still righted on his back as Gideon just works away. He doesn't even notice you,

approach him as he is so focused in his work. Look at this. Ain't she beautiful, Grammy? How does this all work? Well, I could explain it to you. You see how I now I understand Fay Engineering, but I just, I don't believe that we should spend the time going through the mechanics.

Look at the big brain on again. You know how all this works? Oh, man, you know how long I've wanted this? I'm in from tip to tail. I know exactly how she flows, man. and flows, man. Does it like magically fold up and like a, I'm working that in right now.

I would say you would know this. When you first crashed it down on the ground, it was a tiny, like, little toy motorcycle. And you were able to, you immediately felt that you could give it a phrase or a word that would activate it. You pick whatever you choose. And upon saying that, it erupts into this large motorcycle.

It's a folding motorcycle. It's a folding motorcycle. It's a folding motorcycle. Super badass. It's pretty super badass. And I would like you to roll a D20 for me, please. A D20? Yes.

This is going to be a game of chance. Seven? Thank you. That's all I need to know. Yeah, man. I mean, one of the wishes that Obed gave back to me, I had intended it to help Torbeck. I mean, I feel bad about what he went through, man.

We still don't understand any of what's going on with him. and empathize with her. And I wanted to do what I could, but then I realized I could also build this sweet-ass motorcycle, man. And I thought, well, heck with that guy for right now, at least. I mean, she's a beaut. Let me tell you. I mean, what you did, to help Tobach.

So I guess what you're saying is after all this is done, let's say we get through all of this and Tolbeck still is the way he is. You want to try to see it through and help him out? Yeah, man. I do, you know, I know I don't say it often. You probably know, but there's a part of me that never left that train. Him getting snatched up and worked on well, it's just not right. Yeah, you're probably right.

And, you know, he's been a good, he's been a good friend. over the last however many years. I was imagine when you do the fucking chickens now, man. You can't take them home. Can't sell tickets to that show. No, you're right. I mean, just my head's swimming. Now that you can do all this, I mean,

think about what we could do. If we don't, you know, if we just get back home, we pay our debts, and we could have the most magnificent theme park of Southern Carquinos. Think about the rides. you could decide. Oh man, we could sell tickets

for at least 20 gold pieces. And you can imagine those rides, and you're thinking about them as you put the finishing touches on the first project, the first upgrade to your motorcycle.

Cremant, what do you think, man? I mean, it's a little side seat for you. Oh, my. This is me? Yeah, man. Well, all right. See, you got your own little. section. Can I try? Can I try?

Can I try? You want to go for a spin? Are you serious right, man? Grummy hop in, man. Hold on. Hold on. I made you this. I don't know if it's gonna. Oh, well, let's put it on station for a second, man. You have cup holders, both on the side seat and in, on the regular cycle. Oh, I forgot about these magic cup holders. A magic cup holders.

And they're warmers. It gets, it warms it and it keeps the liquid. It's not gonna spill. No, it's spill proof. It's like it'll try and jump ahead. You can't watch it. It's fun to watch. It's fun to watch. I got dry. But the liquid

will kind of lip at the edge, but it won't jump out of the cup, man. It's faint. You're telling me you're fucking more clever than I am now. Man, I'm going to get into an engineering, okay? You're still. I can't, you know, I'm so confused by the whole Vespian mumbler thing, okay? All right, well, I got a nice and just give him some dope and they'll do whatever you say.

That's all it matters, all right. Do I need some kind of helmet or something? Helmet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, let's go. Right in 500 meters. Make a U-turn in 200 meters.

And we drive around the, the oasis. You even, you feel a little bit reckless. As you spin around in the grotto, you're doing donuts, the pony. It doesn't seem to be. The pony. The pony. Grumby's holding on to his hat.

The pony doesn't seem to be concerned at all as he watches all of this. And you feel a little reckless as you skid around and you slide and you realize that your angle directly towards the bridge. And you think, yeah, I think I can make this air. And you rear back and then you gun it straight for the bridge. And you, as you hit the bridge, the entire bike flies up into the air and you activate the two main. This was something that you didn't even. realize that you were adding as you activate two main thrusters on the back and you catch the air and you fly as you ride over this thing and you land softly on the other side. You imagine that

there's not enough fuel in this as of yet to do it for long, but for at least small bursts, this baby flies. And that's where we'll end the session. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Aventra's podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin Tier or higher to unlock Shroud of her Saltmarsh, a patron exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com forward slash Legends of Aventras. If you want to chat about the episode with the avantris community, join us on Discord at Legendsofavantris.com forward slash discord. We also post content nearly every day on YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, so make sure you follow our socials at

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