Legends of Avantris - Stardust Rhapsody: Overture | Ep. 13 | Aurora Sonata

Episode Date: November 1, 2024

A planet has appeared in the sky above the crew of the Rhapsody. A planet that looks all too familiar...   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/c22t_Mu4heI?si=0ZoSA4n9a0SGcG0a

Welcome to Legends of Evantress. I'm Labouche, and you're listening to Stardust Rhapsody is what's happened last time. And I can't torture my fucking self about past regrets. I've done that enough in my life. Well, I'll be damned. It is the Sparrow. I got a poster of you on my wall back at home. Are you a secret mystery racer, Pike?

No. Why didn't you tell us? Sorry, I'm a little off my game, because we witnessed the death of our friend. and one of our friends turned into a horrible super weapon, and I witnessed my favorite animal being brutally murdered, and either my greatest enemy or my dearest love or both, I had to confront her just an hour ago. That same orange hair that bleeds into vibrant red

frame the face of Rex. We'll be ready in time for the race, but it's all for naught if we don't get Kahn's approval. I need this nomination before anything else happens. I heard you were back. Hey, Khan, you got some nerve showing up here. Well, boys, I guess I'll see you after the race. We'll see you in the winner's circle.

Rex Maxim, on his speeder, has taken to the starting line. And by his side, Pike. In the Spow! Win or lose, Rex. This is your last day of freedom, so you better enjoy it. Something dark strikes the prismatic pathway so hard, It splits the racetrack. Aurora hangs in the sky above you, the ice planet,

where you almost captured arrives. It's a Sorian super weapon. All right, you have to get out of here. We don't know what's happening. Something terrible's coming down. I'm not just going to leave. If there's anything I can do to help, I'm not going to leave again.

I don't know what we can do, but I know one thing. I think I got one race left in me. The Atlas takes off into the sky. It's a yellow sheen, uh, undriven in years. but in pristine condition. The number seven sits on its side as he takes off and flies directly at Aurora. Space, the infinite doorway.

No path is kept from you when you take to the stars. You set your heading and become the captain of your fate. But some paths end in a locked door, and some doors were locked a very long time ago. The problem, of course, Keep knocking, and sooner or later, some one or something answers. Having narrowly avoided eternal damnation, the crew of the Rhapsody finds themselves finally at the prismatic pathway, a Technicolor raceway that Pike once called home.

It promised to offer the party a long-deserved moment's rest. But space holds all, it sees all, it tells all, and sometimes it's... It lies. Arriving late, the party heads to the local diner where they run into RAPS. Oh, 1950s style diners. Arriving late, the party heads to the local 1950-style diner where they run into Rex, forming a plan that will let them enter the race and claim the $1 million credit cup. Pike makes a last-minute plea to his former mentor, Leo Kahn, but it falls on deaf ears.

The crew tucks in for the night, content with for once a peaceful sleep, all except for LeBusch. Something within him stirs, knowing what he does not. A simple truth. Once you open a door, it stays open until closed. Waking, the crew heads to the stands in time for the race, only to find overnight Pike's ticket was pulled. Kahn had decreed he wouldn't be watching the race, but riding in it.

Pike made his way to the track. in the sparrow it for the first time in years faced off against wrecks on the battlefield they had danced so many times before the moon shining its spotlight on what could be their final performance exploding off the line they move ferociously towards the checkered flag fighting tooth nail engine and flame it's impossible to tell who's gonna win neck in neck they approach the end when suddenly something crashes from the sky ending the race the cheers pause for just a moment before turning to screams.

Aurora hangs in the sky above them, unsettlingly out of place. Not the moon at all. It rains down dark, black, bloody tears that when fallen take shape, if you can call it that. Bouncers fight back, but every victory is simple delay, as these amorphous horrors from beyond reform and consume. All seems lost. Then you hear it. A sound the pathway hasn't heard in years, but no one has forgotten.

The Atlas, Leocon's racer, roars to life. Exploding out of his garage, he weaves effortlessly through the sky like a leaf in rain refusing to fall. His rage lights up the night, casting a Technicolor symphony that almost seems to make the darkness think twice. Blasting off towards Aurora, he's determined to fight for his home, tooth-nail. engine and flame. Rhett, LeBusch, and Chuckles, the crew.

You've been blasting your way out of the stands through these creatures. Black Icar explodes in all directions around you as you punch, knife, claw, scratch, move back to the Rhapsody. As fast as you can, you made your way back where Hank had gotten the ships back into the hangar bay.

As you turned a final lap entering the garage where the Rhapsody lay waiting, Hank had word up the hammerhead and let fly a massive blast of ether at a gathered charge of these monsters following right after you. You duck as the blast soars cleanly over you. It explodes as black rain. washes all throughout the garage. As it moves to reform all of the bits of it that strike Lubush, you can see yourself

almost covered, not entirely, but definitely sizably covered in a black icker. As it lands on you, it goes to move. You can see it almost extend back towards the opening. of the room, the entrance, trying to reform, trying to gather. But your body doesn't let it.

Your form reaches out and consumes it into yourself. Uh-oh. You find yourself moving faster, stronger, and mechanically, you enjoy an additional 10 feet of movement for the next hour. What am I? Pike, you are in the skies over the racetrack. You are piloting two. piloting to and fro, seeing Leo take to the air.

You are peppering the skies once again, trying to hold off the rain, keeping it from landing on top of the pathway, giving your friends and all of the gathered crowd as much time as they can to get to cover. But you know that it'll only slow down what's coming. And that is where you are. So we're sort of inside this hangar, right?

Are we still, are we on the Rhapsody? Are we on the Rhapsody? Have we, like, take it? You would be the blasted stricken at the entryway. You would be kind of like, you would have been running to it. Labush would have consumed aspects of this black ickr. But you would have been moving towards the Rhapsody the entire time. You can either say that you are on it or you're extremely close to it.

Rhett, talk to me, buddy. Are you on the Rhapsody yet? We're almost there. What the fuck's going on? I couldn't even begin to guess, but you need to get out. out of here. I'm fine. I promise. I'll meet up with you guys as soon as I can. I'm trying to provide some cover. Take it off in 30. Get the fuck on.

Why? How did the point I get here? Gravity's really crazy, guys. I don't know how it was. I just blast past you. Something has happened to me. Do I see anything different? Is it like... Robbius? Perception check.

Guy, I'm worried about the bush. Perception, you say. Do I look different? Like, I'm, like, all completely black or marbles greens and blacks, or, like, how do I look to myself? I know I've pulled in the acre, but is it all just inside my suit,

and I can kind of ignore it? Or did... I'm just curious. Okay. Okay. You do, you do. With 14, we'll say that when the... Bouch was splashed with the blast of these creatures.

You would have noticed it trying to reform, probably. And then look like he had consumed it. Does he physically look different? No, not currently. Oh. Maybe just a, maybe just a, like a fraction of a hair physically bigger. Uh, I would take note of that, but just rush to the cockpit and try to take off as soon as we can.

I don't think there's any reason I would wait. I feel like I would just stand at the entrance, make sure that Chuckles gets on board, and then as soon as he's on the ship, I would follow inside and try to secure myself for takeoff. Can you hear me, this is Pike. Kahn! Mike, you're coming through. What the hell is going on out here? I was hoping you could explain that to me.

I don't know, but something terrible is coming from this planet. I am to clear it out. Alright, I can give you cover and try to get as many of these people to safety as possible. If you have commands or anything, you let me know what you want me to do. I'm moving in closer. This is... get everybody out of the stands if you can. I'm gonna see if... what's producing this? I'm gonna see if I can blow it away.

All right, I'll keep laying down cover fire. Go! And you'll see the Atlas rocket off towards Aurora. Trailing in the wake of the explosion, you'll see Rex's speeder following behind. On the... That's a really cool bug. Fuck you, man.

Is that from the Collectors Edition? This is from the Collectors Edition of the Ruin King. Oh, shit. It's thick. It's pretty fucking cool. And I promise you it's not relevant for any reason tonight. That's not why I brought it.

What? On the Rhapsody, you sprint. Sirens blaring. Everything under siege. The red light, beo, as you make your way down

that classic hexagonal hallway as it runs to the cockpit. Your foot falls echoing as it lands on cold hard steel. You find yourselves in the cockpit. Hank seated, everyone finds their place. Goop boopo. The Rhapsody wars to life.

All right, buddy. Let's get a scan going. What do you fucking see? Are you telling me that's a goddamn planet? And I don't know if we have any sort of sense of like, you know, is this an illusion? Or do we literally think the planet that we were on a few days ago is like in orbit?

Roll in Etherdwarf Technicians Pilot roll. Love that. Pretty good, actually, does my new feature give me a bonus? Flash for Genius. Oh my god. Geez. That sounds good. That's gonna be really good later.

Everyone, for the audience, everyone had leveled up to seven. Everyone here knows that. So they'll be enjoying new abilities. So that is going to be a 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. 17. 17 with a 17. The scans, the scanners on the Rhapsody send out into space.

They ping off the Aurora. The answer comes back quick. It is the exact planet you landed on before. but with an odd frequency producing from it. But the answer is clear. This is Aurora moved very far out of the deep space that it's intended to stay in, almost as if it was drawn here.

This isn't right. This fucking planet. It's halfway across the fucking galaxy. how is such a thing possible? I don't know, but there's some kind of dark reading. And I'll kind of like look at you and throw my brow a little bit. How you feeling, LaBouche? How am I feeling?

You, and I would say as you say the words, how is such a thing possible, you have this sensation in your body, almost like when you're standing, when you're standing like on the edge of a cliff or even looking at the edge of a cliff. and you can feel yourself almost being pulled towards it, desperately wanting to move closer,

but knowing that it's dangerous. I feel a little off. Oh gosh, we have that stuff in the ice. Is it back to get revenge? I think they are related. I can't. And can I try to expel? If I have the ability to consume,

I feel like I, unless it just like disappears, into some other pocket of me that I can't see or find, like a blind spot almost. Like, if I had like a spoon floating around in my body, I'd feel like I could tentacle that out, right? But in this case, it's possessed me. It's all of you. Roll a insight check. With your... It's like when you...

I'm gonna use my new dice. Your new dice. Your new dice. You know, that's bad. Death by ooze. Look how that shit is. Oh my God, incredible. It's easy.

It's whiz. It's perfect. It's perfect. All right. I didn't have had my red dice. Oh. It's a 21. Oh.

Nice. Thanks. Amazing does. Seriously. With a 21, you, as you were running out of the stadium, you saw bouncers of the raceway, and really combatants of all kinds,

attacking these creatures, destroying them, blowing them up, but they would always reform. You, having gone through this process, you gain the sensation that you've done something along the lines of cleansing this and intaking it. And as you have, it's powered you up. It's spoken to something within you, but it's become almost like fuel for you. Energy. It's not something that can be expelled, but it's something that makes you stronger. When the eager hit me it

boosted me up, I feel stronger from it. Oh, are you gonna like turn evil or something? I feel I am in control. It is strangely pulling me to the edge almost. We gotta help Pike and that lion guy. What the fuck did we let out on that thing? Oh, well, probably Rex, but... Oh gosh, Rex is probably dead.

He took so many oyster shooters From your mouth to gods of ears Oh anyways Pike Are you okay? Yeah Chuckles I can hear you What's going on? Oh we're coming we're coming to save you Alright be careful I'm providing cover fire for Khan and then What do we do about this planet? Rick can you hear me? Do you think we can outrun this thing? Can we just get away?

I mean Yeah, we can get away, but is it going to keep following us? I'd rather it follow us and get it away from the prismatic pathway. These people are in danger. All right. That's one fucking idea. Hey? Let's do this.

And I'm going to hit the thrusters and once everything is ready to go and we'll blast off into space and just get a sense of what's going on and if anything's flying around and get a sense of if we, if I think the planet is moving closer, if it's moving in any direction, if I can kind of triangulate, if it's slowly moving. I would say that with your previous role, you would understand the sensors would have read that it was slowly closing the gap towards the raceway.

And so it is, it is in fact moving. But currently relatively slow. As you punch the jet, into position. It, as you punch the Rhapsody Jets into position, they war to life. They explode as you take off out of the hangar bay. You explode out into the open of space and the night sky is speckled with black. As you try and maneuver, It is not simple. And I'd have you roll another pilot's handling check.

Good roll. 26. 26. With a 26, it is not simple, but you are not a simple man. The Rhapsody, as it soars through space, these creatures are falling, dropping through the air. the Rhapsody dances through them, blasting out, creating openings everywhere you can. And you are trying to fly away?

At least like sort of strafing it a little bit, getting away from the raceway and trying to sense if we think that to Pike's idea, if the planet all of a sudden shifts and moves. You fly straight out, so you ascend directly up from the raceway, almost towards. Aurora and you begin blasting at top speeds to circle around it to its other side. And as you do this, you can see on the scanners that the planet, as you move to its side, stops moving. And then as you strafe around to its other, continuously blasting, peppering the sky, obliterating these black creatures as they burst and you crash through and they reform behind you. you. As you make it to the

other side of this planet, it does start to move towards you. Shit. I would like to, after having talked to Red and the crew, keep my eye on the Rhapsody, if I can see them. Keep my eye on Khan and

attempt to also keep my eye on Rex while I'm just laying cover fire and waiting for orders from either from Khan or from Red. Brilliant fucking idea, Einstein. It's moving towards us. All right, whatever you do, don't let it get too close. Don't worry about me, I'll make sure I catch up.

So I'm going to basically try to get around it and try to pull it away to get as much distance between the pathway and the planet as possible. Yeah, with a 26, you firmly move to the other side of the planet and like a tugboat, you are cruising through the skies, but it has a line tied directly to you. And it follows. And as it does, it seems to almost gain speed.

Seeing that you are isolated. And you, Lubush, can feel almost a... That pull, that desire, almost like an animal magnetism, drawing you to it. I am somehow attached to this planet thing. It's pulling from me. I don't get out of the ship LaBouche.

Maybe maybe do you need to get chained up? I don't know how you would chain me up. I move. Oh, I have an idea. We got to put Labus in the brig in case it's cuckoo-Bananas. Labo-Labush, let's go.

Do you consent to going into the brig? I have a cuckoo-Banazada's idea. Oh, what is your idea? Is it going to the brig and putting it in jail? I can eat more of the brink. things. What? That's the opposite of what I was trying to say. Exactly. It's Google Banana! Oh no, we gotta get you the right. Throw in the break for now. It's for your own safety, please.

I'm in the God, I'll run up to the bridge, you'll hit... And the bricks. Uh-oh. Oh, do I see? Do I... Do I go in? No, I'm leading you, I'm leading you to the brick. I hit the console and have the door... The door to the brig swings open as you go to take

Lubush in there and you see Bad dog Oh there's just no time Oh What the hell? I can't believe you still alive Clombeck closet, closet

Clombeck! We're nobody I'm saying It ain't so loud Okay, okay, different idea, different idea I'm trying to remember the status of our ships

Well, I know that Pike's ship was repaired, but everything else is just completely destroyed, right? All of our, well, I'm sorry. Yes, everything was completely destroyed. They'd begun to make repairs, but they had heavily prioritized working on Pike's ship and

Rett's ship, because Kahn had almost taken over the work of the Sparrow personally. So my suit is still fragmented records, basically, from the fight. And we don't have, like, this isn't a battle boss, right? There's no weaponry on the Sardust, or is there?

On the what? On the Rhapsody? On the Rhapsody, yeah. No, no, there are. Oh, there's some, there's some, you know, there's some turrets. Yeah, it's like classic, you know, Millennium. It has the boom, boom, boom, yeah, great fox, millennium falcon. Do I have a station I can get to? Yeah.

I'm going to get to the station that I always go to. Do you think I am a danger? The booge, I don't know how to say, though. Is it... Spit it out I don't understand The van It's croissant or quaffon

It's quaffin Okay, thank Although, I don't know how to tell you this Yes What I think you might be the problem Of course I think you've gotten a whole bunch of people

killed Don't feel Too bad about it But Gosh LaBouche I don't have enough I don't have enough emotional bandwidth

to deal with you I really need my wife I'm really going to go to my station and you do you maybe go in the break you can you can snack up the mad dog but I'm going to go to my battle station

I am putting you in danger you go to your battle station it's back in the dunk tank I'm just left alone in the You can hear the sounds of Mad Dog. I'm gonna start to make my way to the hangar. Oh, pooh, please, face. You do so, you make your way to the hangar.

Do, I guess, how big is this planet where, can I kind of, are we like now, like totally behind it, and the planet's between us and the spaceflight? I would say yes, you have at this point you've been able to blast around the, planet and it's now Aurora is between you and

the prismatic pathway. So almost like Orion's belt kind of format. Oh, very cool. Once that's the case, I will just basically turn and I'll say Pike, we're gonna

fucking jet off here. We're going to go as fast as we can. So if you get into trouble, we won't be that close. Understood. I I promise, I'll be all right. Once everything's taken care of here at the pathway, I'll make my way to you. And then we've got to figure out what we're going to do about this planet.

All right, buddy. Thrusters do 100. Let's do this, and I'll hit a button. Good luck. Like, all of you'll be clanking and chugging as the giant ether engines start converting, and the chemical reactions get stronger, and things were,

and things rattle a little bit. and the propulsion of the Rhapsody will basically be at full speed, the fastest we can possibly. Full speed, the Rhapsody ignites these engines, word alike, almost like the start of an old beat-up car that you know is just going to come on if you give it enough time. And the engines kick to life in absolute top speed. And you are blasting off away.

from the pathway. But you do get the sensation that, though you've dramatically increased the speed in the output of the ship, is as such, you have not actually increased the speed at what you're moving. You have remained steady.

This isn't good. Scratch that. That we've got some pull on us. I don't know if it's a fucking tractor beam or what, but we can't escape it. Oh no. Brett, it is me. I can feel it.

It is like I am attached to that thing. What the fuck are we gonna do about it? Your suit's not fixed yet. If it wants me, I can... I can go. It will stop. No, no, no. We're not gonna lose another one of you!

I can save all of these people! Fuck! Uh, do I remember how badly it was damaged and how quickly I think I think, I think that I might be able to at least patch it together to give him some kind of protection if I can get his excavator 9,000 or whatever we're calling it, up and going. I think you would know that it was, I mean, everything was really badly wrecked, but they had gotten, they had been able to get most things back to just like baseline functional, not fully completed, but you would think if you wanted to like Hank autopilot, Hank pilot, run to the hangar bay, you might have, it might take you five, ten minutes to get it just a little bit closer to where you'd want to.

Before you do anything fucking stupid, just give me a goddamn second. Hank, just turn on cruise control and I'll hit the set and then I'll hit start and I'll like up a mile per hour. a little bit more as much as I can. Actually, no. Knowing that we haven't increased, I'm actually going to drop the thrusters that we're still going. But I want to save some of the fuel. Yeah, absolutely.

You do so. And you can see the engine output was pushing into red-level conditions as you were trying to explode out, but it's drawing you back. And so throttling back on the engines has brought you back into a functionally safe

standpoint on the Rhapsody. Hank takes over piloting control, keeps your heading, and flies into space. I'm going to rush to my workshop and hanging on my wall is that kind of canister that has

the ether cord that we found on the junk planet, and I'm going to rip it off the wall. Oh shit. Better use of using it now before we all fucking die. And I'm going to carry it under my arm and run down to the hangar and basically basically, would you be there?

I'm next to the panel to open the door. Okay, so I will meet you there. All right, just give me 10 minutes. What is your plan? I can stop the deaths now. You need some fucking protection. You can't just go out there. And if I can utilize this,

at least it will give you a little bit of speed and power, all right? I don't think that I need it. I think... What do you mean I'm fucking needed? I can consume it. them. It's gonna fly out into space like you are?

Go to the planet. Go to the planet. I mean, if there's even a fucking, you know, I'm sure what we saw at the raceway was a fraction of what's on the fucking planet. Stuff these creatures are made of. They make me stronger. Fuck.

Look, take the suit, all right? You might need it. And if you don't, leave it there for all I care. Who gives a fuck if the Grun Corporate The Empire finds that thing. Ten minutes. Ten minutes. And I'll get to work. And I'll immediately

start doing what I can and I'll try to very hastily kind of connect his like propulsion systems and any kind of energy systems of the suit to the basically the chess piece Iron Man style right. I've heard of installing this canister into the center of it.

and but being hasty and knowing that, you know, every minute that waits, potentially people are going to die. Yep. It's not perfect. Well, roll an engineering check. Let's see if it is. Come on. Oh, it's gonna be perfect.

I need a threshold. Uh, I'll use this one. Yeah, I twist this. Twist this. This is very important. And while you're doing it. I'm gonna twist one more. One more twist.

Pike. What is it, Khan? I don't know what. I don't know what your crew is doing, but it looks like the planet's moving away from the raceway. The plan was to try to use them as a diversion, but they seemed to be stuck or getting pulled back into the planet. There's a real chance I'm going to have to go after them, Con. It's strange. There must be something going on. I've moved into its low orbit to get a sense of the surface.

Looks like almost has like black ant hills these things are oozing out of. I could shoot into them, but they seem to reform. Don't get too close. We don't know what's going on on the surface. If they get pulled in, we might have to land. I don't need you getting stuck there too. We gotta stop this thing, Pike. We don't know what it's gonna do.

It's not stopping on its own. Alright, let me see if I can get a hold of Rett, and I'll get back to you. Hang tight. Don't crash. Rett, come in. What's the update? You said you were stalled. I'm working, but... Leboos wants to handle this. What do you mean he wants to handle it?

I'm not gonna try to talk sense into him. I'm fucking giving up on that. But I think it's drawn to him, and he thinks so too. Don't tell me he's going down to the surface. I don't know what he's gonna do, but he's gonna try to fucking absorb him. As I'm tinkering, I will all of the surface. all of a sudden something will click. And, oh, if I attach this tube to this,

and I can change the lubricate just a little bit, and I have a flash of genius. As a reaction, I can add five to an ability check or a saving throw. What? I've been waiting for that. Okay.

And so I, my total is 36. With a natural 27. With a natural 20. I roll a natural 20 plus, yeah, 37. This is rare air, everybody. 36. 36. Oh, shit. In 10 minutes, you have crafted perfection.

You start to route this core into the center of the suit. And then there's a moment, not that coupling, but here, if I route it this way, it changes the orientation of the flow and the cooling can maximize energy output. put. And as you insert it, you know intrinsically that this is perfect work. And your intention to power

this suit is absolutely going to fucking do it. All right, well boost it's as good as it's going to get. It's only been five minutes. It's done. Go, go, go! And I will jump into, from

my suit, into the larger suit. Essentially, my goo will fill the veins of this thing. What would normally be the... Oh, what's the word for... Hydraulics. What? Hydraulics. Yeah, for hydraulics.

It's goo drollics. As I fill the hands and I'm able to move the arms and how does the new energy source, like, feel? It's in your chest. It's in my chest. It's in the, it's not your chest, but it's in the chest of this giant suit. And I mean, I think I leave it up to you.

When you juice into it. it and your form becomes and enters the hydraulics are the same, becomes the movement. You're empowered by the Iker, but you feel this pulsing ether core perfectly crafted with maximum output, all of the dangerous, unstable energy, perfectly encapsulated by Rhett and connected to give you a feeling the likes of which you've never experienced before. It's like the moment where normal All Might engages his form and you're just fucking, you've never felt so powerful. You have all of the energy of all of the ages coursing within you. You have created a masterwork.

Can you get a little double D for you right here? Ah! Ah! Open to hang a ball! The hangar bay door! Closing up, I hit a big button and the hangar door will open up, and I'll take a step back. You're clear for takeoff. Thank you.

If I don't see you again, I'll see you again. I'm going to a planet made of food. And I will jump in one motion and fly out into space, endeavoring to reach the planet surface, targeting it. As this happens, I don't know what you did to it is to go, General's gathered in the nonsense. I also installed a stereo. I had two extra minutes once I finished. Click.

Every time you get into a car in Fortnite, the first button you hit, turn the radio off. Um, LaBusch, roll in athletics saving throw. I'm gonna use my big dice because I'm in my big suit. Roll a strength or dexterity saving throw. I'm sorry. Saving throw, you say?

Yep. But that's not what I want. Strength or dexterity? Strength or dexterity, saving throw. I'm going to go with a 21. Pretty good. Twenty one. Twenty-one.

What's your, what are they doing? It looks like they've just dropped a bomb towards the planet star. I don't know how else to say this con, but one of ours is going to the surface. They're sending one man down. Well, sort of. One jelly person. You've made some weird friends. Um, um,

Libush, you start, uh, rocketing towards the planet's surface. Uh, you can feel, you can feel, you can feel, you can feel, you can, feel completely free now. Like you're moving exactly where you're intended to be. Your arms by your side, you fire out like a bullet as the

planet is drawing you in or you are drawing it. At this point, it is hard to tell who is going to. I let it. And I feel like maybe I have hope in my heart which is a remarkable feeling in this state. You start to

ignite almost in flame as you break through the atmosphere. of this planet. The ether engine core warring, crackling, steaming to life as it makes your suit impenetrable.

As you're crashing towards the planet's surface headfirst, you're able to flip legs down, and as you land, oh shit. It would be... Oh, yeah. It would be like a cloud of water.

It would be like a cloud of white. You get that far away shot from the... Yeah. You can see the little plume on the surface. You land on the ground, and exactly that. You create a crater that sends spidering cracks throughout the ice in a 100-yard radius destroyed circle.

You can see it on the planet's surface from the cockpit of the Rhapsody. a massive crater as you've landed onto the ground. And you take 15 points of damage. Very good. It's not too bad. Oh, that's good. I'm going to look around and see if I can find more of these black acre creatures.

I am encased in my suit. So as I do, I want to remove my suit's gloves to give myself essentially two hands, to be able to absorb more of these. Basically, two mouths that I can grab them with and hopefully start pulling them in to see if I have the same ability to consume these creatures that I did

with Iowa's first covered with the Iker. Roll an investigation check. Would you see that like a high proportion of your body is now just in those two hands? It's like really big hands. Yeah, I would absolutely say that. That's the case. But if I am going to get bigger from consuming,

then I can slowly fill out. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The investigation you say, this is going to be very high. Give me a five. Twist. We're twisting. This is very narratively relevant. Twist.

Give me a 14. With a 14, you move easily. You don't climb as much as you put one thundering footstep in front of the other. as you ascend out of this crater you have made within the ice. As you move out, you notice a couple things around you. This is truly Aurora. Around you, a sheet of ice, white snow. There's no wind today.

And you see simply what looks like one pulsated. dark, like large ant hill, like a fissure in the ground, a planet wound, directly ahead of you. But you would expect

almost from the volume that this planet was putting out, you would expect this place to be covered in something like that, but it doesn't seem to be. You find just one ahead of you. I immediately targeting it, I will look for

for the others and be like, I think your friends will come. You will have to be the appetizer! And I will attempt to grab it and swallow it with my hand if I can reach it. You move out, boom, boom, boom, as you take these lumbering footsteps

as you approach. And I will go into a rage. As on your final approach, it plumes and puckers, as it spits out a black orb that it sends and looks like it loops around, almost like it's gonna head towards the raceway. But on your approach, you fire out a hand and catch it in air, and instantly it is absorbed within your form.

I'm Michael Jordan pose if I grab the, you reach out towards this planet wound, and as your hand hovers about it, It trembles and oozes and moves and shakes as tendrils of liquid are magnetized towards you as you start to wrestle with it and I need you to make an athletics check. An athletics contest. Advantage. Advantage. That's exactly right.

That's exactly right. Let me just get over to you say athletics or acrobatics? Uh, I don't know. Athletics. There we go. go with a 27. Nice. A 27.

Nice. There's this pull as you reach out and it tries to move back from you desperately, desperately, but effortlessly, you don't let it. And your hand moves out, and as it mingles with it, it starts to pull this opening in the ground, this black Icar up out of it, and you absorb it. And you feel energized. It's better than the love. Falls.

And you gain one strength. Whoa. This might get out of hand. Very quickly. I do not envy for who she's. Somehow managed to make myself roll. I didn't know that was enabled on this.

I'm going to have to figure out how to do that. But yeah, I have 21. And I will start to look around. Does it feel like I depleted this ant hill? It is, so once you have absorbed it, it is now gone from the point. planet's surface and in you just see a crack in the ice. Rhett, I think it worked. I can feed on this planet.

Alright, how do you feel? Have you already consumed something? Yes, I consumed one little, little guy. And you're still yourself? I feel powerful. I feel good. All right. Just the second you start feeling off, all right? You fucking stop. I'm going to go see if I can find more. Hopefully they are leaving the Raceway planet and making their way here.

I'm storming off, and I'm going to continue to see if I can find Ant Hells as quickly as possible and find these fissures, just hoping that I can play whack-a-mole with anything that I can find. It's like an all-you-can-eat buffet, I presume. I'm at my battle station, which is a very large TV and an air.

N64 control. Oh, it's just like SunCat 54. And it's just like a super N64 style graph. 64-bit graphics as I'm attempting to use turrets. If there's any, like, goo creatures following, are they goo creatures? Are they flesh and blood?

Are they... It's hard to tell, actually. They... I'm shooting them up. They fluctuate between these unsettlingly amorphine black shapes. And in moments,

especially after you'd have seen on the planet, after consuming, after killing onlookers, they almost, for a moment, seemed to take actual form. And you see, you would remember seeing at the time what looks like terribly sharp teeth,

tendrils. And the, most unsettling color of eyes. There's a lot of them. Are they attacking? Roll and attack roll. Oh gosh. So they're also in space. They're also in space. It's like pluming out.

It's like pluming out I'm sorry? I'm going to use a twist. You can use a spell attack roll. The church would be powered by whatever you're. I'm going to cash in my twist fate. And I'll to re-roll this one.

Oh, it's 16. I also got to roll on my wild magic surge too. Oh, my goodness. Thank goodness. Thank goodness. Oh, why am I putting? Oh, 16. It's like a 20, it's like a 24. 24.

Yes, with a 24. You're at your gun turret and you lock into it. You're sitting, you have your N64 controller in front of your Rathoid K-tube, Rathoid K-tube? Cthoid Ray tube, that's what it is. Cathoid Ray Tube TV, as you're firing out.

And instead of the classic laser guns that the Rhapsody shoots out, you're shooting out, like, twin water blasts out into the air of Seltzer. As these creatures are flying all around the ship, Grette Hank still piloting, as best they can to avoid any collisions, but there are figures hitting the hole, but you're blasting out just shattering these goo creatures all around you as best you can. But as you destroy them, you'll notice that as you destroy them for a moment, as they get disintegrated and blast apart, as you attack them, it looks almost like

they won't reform. They take much longer, but eventually they do still reform. Oh, they keep coming. Gosh darned, I said I liked crab rangoon and goss chicks. Not crab rangoon and shawgoth chicks.

Oh, hold on a second. I open up the space fridge. I grab a back, frozen lasagna pizza. I'm running on the brakes. Here you go, man, talk. We don't want him alive. I sit back down.

Rule a perception check. Oh, me? My dog doesn't eat it. We don't eat it. We don't eat it. No, no. Oh, Vigia. I don't eat veggie a day in my life.

I'd rather start. Reception. Oh, God. We can get jettison his ass out into the vacuum. I got a six. A six. With a six, as you're gunning, as you're

gunning through these creatures, you're now the planet, you can tell the planet is getting closer and closer to you. It's drawing you in a gravitational pull. You catch the oddest glinting from the planet's surface. Not like

reflected light, but kind of like a weird colorful light. Oh. Guys, are you seeing this weird colorful light on the planet? I thought this is all just black and white because of ice and ooze. I would be, I would still basically be trying, I would be back in the

cockpit and I would be taking the ship away. Now that Laboos is on the planet, is there any change in like, has the planet stopped moving? Is it, like, are we now making just a delay? Good question. Yes. So you would see on the sensors, absolutely, the planet has now stopped moving.

That Labush has reached its surface. It no longer is moving away from the raceway, but it is still drawing you in through its gravitational pull. Though it doesn't seem to be following you anymore, just an aspect of space. space. All right, Laboosh, you being down there, the planet stopped moving. Ha! Any other signs of danger?

When I hear strange light, I'm looking at all the horizons around me, do I see any colorful light in my general vicinity, or am I going to have to circumnavigate this globe? Roll on investigation check. I wouldn't be happy to. For...

No. You do not. Damn. It's like a rainbow in the dark. Can you give me some orientation? Oh, it's to your... Oh. Rent, can you give me some orientation?

Red, do you see the planet? Hold on, just my rearview here. Oh, wait. To your left. As you adjust your rearview mirror, you say objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. And the planet is taking up the entire mirror. I don't think I would be looking at because I would have a perspective

And I roll the six Do I get like any orientation? No. Yeah. Not necessarily. Turn left. I immediately start stomping left And along the way if I'm hitting

any ant hills we're calling them or fissures or if I'm seeing any more of these creatures, I'm like making noise. I'm shouting. I am stomping. I'm trying to crack the ice. I'm doing everything that I can to try to attract these creatures that I think,

for whatever reason, benefit me, and I can neutralize and hopefully save lives. And you're finding them. As you move around, you find smaller visher after smaller visher. Not that they're getting smaller, just like they're small-ish ones you get the sense. You're finding them, and as you do that same tug of war,

but you're capable of consuming them, and it feels amazing as you draw them out of the planet. And you get the sense that around this area, you are healing it. You are expunging whatever taint has afflicted this world. But you also are getting the sense that this is just the tip of the iceberg. You have to find the source. And you start to, after moving around,

you start to recognize the, area just a little bit as the same area you touched down before when you made your way to the Sorian temple. With that relative idea of landscape, do I have a general sense of where the temple was? You have a general, I would go this way, kind of sense. This isn't left at all! And I start to turn and I start to make my way, cracking through the ice. And as I come Press, small fissure or small fissure, I will heal the wounds, but I'm starting to look for either colorful light or for the temple using my memory and recollection to the best of my ability. Okay. You head down, you head down a familiar path, and you make your way there.

We'll say at this point, the gravitational poles become so strong that the Rhapsody has entered low orbit. and you are moving towards landfall. Pike, we're not escaping this. How are things at the raceway? How are things at the raceway? Things at the raceway. So actually, once LaBouche touched down on the planet, you would have noticed a distinct and dramatic

lessening of the pluming of these dark figures. So you're still flying through air, peppering them, destroying them, keeping them away from the the raceway, but at this point, much of the, much of the amassed gathering of the crowd has been able to scutter away and make it to safety or is killed in the stands. But they're, unfortunate, they're, unfortunately. They're either safe or had fallen in the first moments. It looks like we're gaining ground. I think things are going to be okay here. You think you're not able to escape. Shoot me your coordinates. I'll be right there. All right, here we are.

him over. Do I recognize that we're on a similar side of the planet in the same way that sort of Laboosh does, but from this vantage point? I would say you, so the snowstorms aren't happening that they were when you first fell. So when you first fell, it was very hard to scan the surface of the planet.

and understand where you were, what you were looking for. This is not the situation you find yourself in now. The planet, you can understand the surface to a certain degree. You're getting pulled down not too far away from where you left, where LaBouche had made landfall. And you also have a degree to kind of pilot down in and land where you'd like. But you would be able to tell, you see a similar, cut out in the ice that leads towards

a ravine that leads towards what you believe to be the temple, and you understand you're approaching rapidly a very familiar place. So knowing that we're being pulled, right, and that I'm just going to try to use the thrusters, sort of have like a controlled crash almost, and try to make it as as least damaging as possible. and guide us to a place close to Lubbush,

but where we're not going to get, like, crashed and stuck if we fix the problem and then are able to take off of it. Yeah, absolutely. We'll just keep your 20-freaking 6. As you are making landfall, you are hitting this rapid approach, but you know the instant you can engage the reverse thrusters. And instead of attempting to slow

and burning out your propulsion, as you get closer. You save for the perfect moment. You kick in the repulsor burners as you come towards the planet surface. As the ship bounces almost off the planet. And you kind of you spin and you skirt to a stop in the ice on top. Perfectly placed and dropped without damage. Listen, the Rhapsody's stuck. They're making contact with the surface. I'm going for him.

Be safe out there. I'm still in low orbit. I'll track anything that looks like it's taking off the planet, destroy it. And if you need covering fire, I'll provide it. I don't know what I'm gonna find when I touch down. But if we can deal with this thing, get as far away as you can. Be safe, Pike. You too, Khan. And I follow the coordinates to find the Rhapsody. And you do so. You fly in a lower trajectory over the planet surface. You make a perception check. I would be honored. Perception, you said. Perception. Dirty 20.

Dirty 20. With a dirty 20, you are blasting over these icy hills. You see actually the ruins of the temple. And as you fly over it, you see what... You see what looks like almost a river running out of its mouth of black liquid. And this is the temple that we originally had been in. The temple that you originally been in. And as you fly over and you make your way, you're going almost the reverse, the path that you took here the first time. As you fly over, you see a similar glinting light on a horizon.

and it is oddly, as Chuckles described, almost like a rainbow light. Hmm. Whoa. That disappears, flashes for a briefest moment, and disappears in an instant. Hey guys, can you hear me? Yeah, we can hear you loud and clear. Yeah, I'll pipe. I've got you.

We've got a serious problem. I just passed overhead of the temple that we left before. The ruins, it's a nightmare. There seems to be a black river flowing. from the ruins of the temple. All right, you say. Yeah, and beyond that, I saw some weird flash

of vibrant, multicolored light on the horizon, just for a moment. I should be getting to the Rhapsody any minute. All right. We've made touchdown. It ain't going to go anywhere, so we're going to make the rest of the way on foot. All right, sit tight.

I'll catch up. Chuckles, get off the goddamn game. Let's go. Oh, I'm shooting. Oh, it was all in my, it was all fun cats. I was playing Thuncats. It was Hanks, you know?

Yeah, yeah. Hades made in the guns. Chuckles' battle station is just so he can have fun during his Man, I should know he didn't have tons of really cool giant red bomb. Okay. I'll join the rest of the crew. So we're leaving the Rhapsody, and probably as Pike maybe gets to where we are. You see a sparrow comes screaming around as you get a hanger for you so that you can. Dock it.

You are getting your ice gear on in the hangar bay as you send the command to drop the hangar door as it opens. And Pike expertly lines up, flies in, spins it and parks it right in the spot. And then once I come running out of the sparrow out of the hangar to where you guys are on the bridge, I'm just wearing what I normally wear, except it's a giant puffy magenta a jacket with like a blue scarf. It's just what spike wears a little bit. Yeah. Hell yeah.

Hell yeah, you have that. That's fun. I'm going to grab my Popo outfit as well. And I'll look and I'll see the pink one hanging next to the blue one and I'll be like Oh. I don't grab that. All right. As soon as I get to you guys,

I'll like skid to a stop and be like All right, any update on Labouche? Do we see him actually? How far would he be from here? Not much further ahead. He, a superhero, Marvel superhero crash landed into the planet, but you were able to kind of fly down, and you made more of a diagonal trajectory as you approached,

and you would have known to kind of, like, be on his tail. He would probably be, he would definitely be within your vision range, and, but ahead of you, but you'd see him. All right, it looks like he's just ahead. We're going to catch up, Laboos. Keep doing your thing, but don't get too far. I'm, uh, I'm moving at, I'm dash speed, right? I'm moving 100 feet, 100 feet, 100 feet, 100 feet.

I'm like the Hulk as he smashes through with the forest in a Marvel film. I'm just jumping and then reaching the next thing, stopping to briefly pull out, one of these weird gooey boys and then just crushing it and continuing on my way. It sounds like we'll be there around the same time. So I will, I guess, I'll bring Hank with me. And I think we would just start hustling towards the temple. Yeah, oh yeah, absolutely.

As quickly as we can. As you step out of the Rhapsody, you're immediately hit with a familiar chill as the air takes hold. But it's not the cold that sends the shiver up your spine. The feeling an animal gets when it's being hunted,

slowly creeps from the bottom of your spine to the base of your neck. Something knows you're here, and you get the sense that it's watching you. You know, if you're going to go anywhere, you'll have to make it back to the Sorian Temple, and you all head out. Labush, you are bounding ahead.

You know, obviously you would have seen or felt or maybe you're maybe you're so laser focus locked in but you would know that the rhapsody had landed behind you and your party is making their way to you but you have this sense of purpose you are energized by what you're doing you are the hero of this story and you are the janitor you can clean this place up and i think i would be not be Nealending necessarily, recognizing that my friends are just behind me, I might go a little bit wider to find additional fissures to absolutely guarantee that they won't run into any of the same. Like a snake. Like a snake.

Like a snake. Yes. You were slithering along the ice back and forth. You find pockets here and there of these visions in the ice and you consume. You're feeling good as you bound forward. when the crew catches up. As I turn, I'm in this massive, like, worker drone neck suit thing that we haven't named.

And one of my hands is like absolutely huge at this point. The other hand is there to make sure that I can scrape along the ice. I'm sure I'm covered almost in like frosty residue and such. Do I look even bigger? Does my hand look different? Or am I just straight absorbing this stuff and remaining in control? When you are absorbing this stuff

and remaining in control, you feel almost an interesting sense that you aren't hungry. That kind of like uncontrollable primal hunger that's come over you and you've grappled with this power before is absent. You are just emboldened.

You're just empowered. You do, however, you are noticeably bigger than before. Not, like, comically huge, but it's now not just like a fraction of a size increase that you have to really be paying attention to. You would look bigger, and it's not just the suit. It's fern and it's noticeable. Like, literally looming over the three of you, you can hear over the loudspeakers on my suit. Hey, you guys!

Mabush. You been working out? Yes, I have. Fick game. Working out this problem. How are you? Yeah, I'm okay. I'm better. I play some Suncat 54. Oh my gosh.

We're on a hill playing. Oh, gosh. These are mountains of madness, truly. Oh, we're at the mountains of madness. It's going to be all right. I will protect you. Out of the modifications. How are they working out?

It is a master work. I have never felt stronger. And it's not just because of the echo. All right, well, why don't you go first? We'll be right behind you. You lead the way. Yeah. I'll just walk casually because I'm at this point, like,

me just having like a casual stroll, you guys have to actually probably have a light jog in order to keep up. And I will turn, presuming that I, at this point must be in view of this temple, and start to beeline. And if we happen to come across any fissures before my friends arrive,

I will reach down inside and crack it like a little glow stick and pop it back. You're not inside of the temple just yet. It is over a couple more ridges before you can get there. You have a general sense of just about how far it was because you've flown over it and made the trip extremely recently.

And you make your way along. through a very familiar pathway. And as you approach where you had once ridden the cart before, as you evaded charging wolves and giant land sharks, you see what looks like almost a snow-covered giant mound and a red pool in the snow ahead of you. In my minutes on the surface of this planet

perhaps longer I've been going from fissure to fissure have I come across any creatures or seen anything like wolves or anything like that at all? Not yet. I'll stop in my tracks when I see this mound. Guys,

the creatures on this planet they may not have survived. Oh, and the little penguins that Kivir loved riding so much and wasn't afraid of it all. Yeah. So whatever we did here, we destroyed all of the ecosystem, too? I don't know if it was... Yeah. ...hauster those things. But whatever we let out, maybe there was room for nothing else.

Oh, gosh, all those Ith Wolves. Well, there's a lot of it, too. I mean, it is pouring out from the core of this planet. Can none of you check out that mound? I'm afraid I might hurt anything delicate. All right, give me a second. And I'll go to where he pointed, and very, like, quickly and quietly, I'll try to, like, very deftly, like, move up to it

and see if I can get within range of what he's talking about to get a closer look. Roll a perception check. Yeah, that's the one. That's where I'm the biking. Not bad. 19. 19. You creep forward and you move.

Arm at the ready combat stance. As you move swiftly, but deftly, almost as if the footing under you never leaves the ground. but you cascade across it towards this creature, and the smell hits you first, the smell of death, the smell of decay, the smell of rotting. And as you get closer, you realize that the snow has been stained by blood. And if you continue forward and you start to move around it

to see what this is, a huge, like iced land shark is covered in snow on the top and has a massive gaping wound in its side and lies dead on the ground. I get as close as I can doing my best to ignore the smell

to see if the wound has any of this black residue that we've been seeing mixed in it. One investigation check. Damn it. That's not the one. Come on. Hey, come on. Natural!

Oh! Oh! I felt it happen. For a total of 21 investigation. For a total of 21 investigation. So I squat, like on my heel. I slav squat like right next to it. You, as you walk around this thing,

you now realize that stealth is not as much a priority. You put your hand out on the side of this beast, and you know immediately that it has been long dead. As you move to the gaping wound and you look at it and you squat down and it almost envelopes you as you're in it. It is a giant tearing hole. You notice something interesting. It looks like a bite mark, but not bite marks. It looks like a single bite mark has been taken out of the side of this creature. And you do notice

where almost you've been burned in, as places where the skin, the flesh, the muscle was severed away, you do find hints of the black Icar. While I'm looking at it, I reach into my puffy overcoat and I pull out a cigarette and I light it.

And then I quickly, not run, but I move quickly back to the rest of the group. It's a rule I found. Bad news. Some sort of, one of those ice sharks. It's been dead for a while, but it looked like it had one giant bite taken out of it. Whatever ate it, left behind a lot of that black residue.

Like one giant fucking bite? Yeah. You been okay? No, it's been dead for days, weeks. Oh. With always the bigger fish or land shark or l'bush. I've got this feeling like there's something lurking

watching us. I think we have to go to the fourth. You think it's whatever the fuck did that? Well, whatever did, what worries me is this stuff might be coalescing, and maybe it's taken some horrific form. My plan is to explore as much of the planet as possible and consume.

Perhaps I can go less faster. Are you sure that's a good idea, Labush? It is not nourishing me, but it makes me stronger. More important, I neutralize the creatures, the acore. What happens when you become more of that stuff than you are? bar of your stuff. Here's the thing. Hank hit

dozens of them with lasers and they don't fucking die. They explode and they come right back together. It seems like whatever he's doing is the only way that actually fucking stops him. Maybe this is whatever the Weaver did to you.

Maybe he gave you some kind of power like this is your fucking purpose. Maybe. Or perhaps any one of my type might have the same reaction. Well, I'm with you,

Wrette. If the second something starts feeling off, you tell us. As soon as I lose control, I will let you know. Right now I feel like Laboosh. Oh, should we go get...

Mad Dog in case he needs, like, a snack that isn't one of the Oos guys, so he doesn't eat us. I'm not hungry. Now you aren't. What if... I crave humanoid flesh. I must have immortal.

I've never craved human flesh. And if we get off this fucking planet, we're gonna need credits to survive and mad dog still got a bounty on his head. Oh, you're right. It was dead or alive, right? I don't fucking know. Was it? Yeah, it was. Yep.

Yep. Let me check. Oh, yep. I don't know if he ate the pizza, but good, I'm glad it was either war. Anyway. You explode. Oh! You gave him the lasagna one, right?

You all explode. Oh, gosh. No, this is the one time you can say space rocks fall you all die. Space rocks fall. Asteroids. Asteroids fall. Asteroids fall.

Asteroids fall. Wait, did I open the pizza drawer or the arsenic? drawer. I don't know why we picked up those beats and slice-shaped wedges of arsenic. I can't remember why we got those. I think we were trying to hunt space rat. Anyway, I think I picked the right one. We leave. We continue on. You carry on the ruins of the temple. You carry on a familiar path. Rising up against you as you walk an icy pathway that declines downward.

rising up is that same ice cliff that hugged your left as you raced away from creatures charging at you. You can see embedded into the wall blaster burns, almost magenta heat flares, scratches in the ground where Labouche was firing punches out at the onslaught of charging. nature that was chasing you last time. You see your signature, the signature of the Rhapsody. Damage and destruction, everywhere you go. And you come to the end of this pathway. And once again, off in the distance, not too far, just a bit ahead of you.

you see a huddled mass of dark figures each one looks to be about six and a half seven feet tall there are about ten of them

huddled up around each other they seem still they seem still go go smash them and eat them I think so yeah hold on Marley

is that what you've been eating down here I've been pulling the liquid free from fishers in the ice. All right, we'll do your thing. Just smash into them. Use your turbo charge. I use my turbo charge. Wait, you said there's ten of them, right? There's ten of them.

Oh, there's perfect. I specifically see. Turbocharge kills ten I'm right here. Roll. Attack roll. I will run up and I will, oh, this is not my, it didn't land on it. Okay. Man, okay. That was weird. Oh, thank God.

Attack roll, you say? Good grief. I'm going to enjoy a 17 to hit. With a 17, you run up bounding. The rest of you can feel the ground quaking beneath each one. of his steps as he charges forward. You take bigger and bigger strides as you start to gain air. Eventually you just leap into the air and you form into the... You just get two giant mallet arms as you crash down onto the ground and you obliterate four of these objects.

As you stand up, proud of your accomplished work, you look around, and you see the forms of your penguin friends as you have decimated four of them covered in blood beak covered in blood beak viscera ice and death it robs out in all directions No I got this Don't come near I Alright Can you take them

Little day back here You've got this LaBusch These ones seem okay Yeah Let me play some pump up music for you That new stereo

assistant We have been It brings me I quit I quit I quit We should I don't know what to do.

Wow. That was incredible. If they'd start running away, just let them run away. They don't start running away. Come on you guys, go. They are going to order me to give you. Can't the other let the other, no, please go.

LaBouche, you do a great six lift. Six to go, you just gonna smash These specimens are forced so easily. Not only do they not run away, in fact, they don't respond to your presence at all. Ooh. Guys hide. Run.

You guys. Go. I'm wearing up the ether can. You better let me know. LaBoucheats up here. I'm gonna like scoot one with the back of my hand. I'm gonna try scooting one. Come on.

You reach out. Oh, fuck. You reach out and you touch the form of this penguin and you feel ice cold. Roll on investigation check. Oh, maybe they'll already be dead. Thank God. Please let them already be dead. Four.

With a four. You move around. You move around to the front of this penguin and looking directly into its eyes, you know that it is long dead. and there doesn't seem to be any life, any movement inside. They stand they stand collected

in this strange circle and the only odd thing is they're almost posed like they're paused in time. That's a nightmare. One looks like it was in the middle of throwing the snowball to the other. One has a playful look on its face having just been struck.

The others look like they may have been in the middle of building a snowman, but no such structure remains. Like Pompey-style. Yeah. I was seeing the same thing.

Great pull. Guys, it's not the echo. It's... We run up. Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's safe! Okay. Just look.

Oh, my God. God. Oh, Labush, what happened? They look like the creatures to me. I smash these four and the others are dead. And as you look on the remaining penguins, that familiar inkling at the base of your neck creeps like an itty-bitty spider up your back

and nestles in the worst place. Give them a quick once over before we leave. Check for any of that stuff. We can't stay here alone. Just quick. Real quick. All right, fine. I'll keep a lookout.

Don't worry. I'll approach and my eye will start to glow and sort of scan them up and down and see if I get any sense, maybe how they died, or if there's any kind of signature of the ooze or the goo or anything else. One investigation check. Do I have some kind of, like, advantage thing? Let me see. I think I just have like a skis. made myself a... Investigator.

Don't you have eyes of minute seeing? I love the eyes of minutes seeing. I don't think I do. That's one of the oldest jokes in Amantris. Yeah, it is. No, that's just going to be a... Investigation. That's going to be a... 17.

That's plenty. With a 17, you take one step back and your eye flicks to different scanning modes. You flick thermal, nothing. You flick frequency, nothing. You flick x-ray.

And you see that each and every one of them is impaled by a giant black spear that pierces from the base of the ground up through their skull. And as you look down, you can see it penetrating from the ground

and it runs directly up them. Almost... Almost when you do that to an animal? Taxidermine. Almost like a taxidermied penguins set on black spears. What in the hell.

LaBouche. Lift one of those penguins straight up. I'll just lean down where I'm standing and grab the nearest one and sort of... Roll an athletics contest. Oh, sick. I will spike at 25. Damn, okay. Hold on, hold on.

You worry. It's been more than a minute. I don't have money. You're in a suit, so maybe. You get the perfect ether engine charging. Maybe it's like a perma rage. If you want to give me perma rage, I'll roll again to fish for a 20. You have perma rage right now.

You kidding me? Uh, yeah. Loaning seat is one looks like. 20s, actually. With a 26, you put your hands around the sides of this penguin. It's arms up, almost like it was giving a little dancey wave, and you go to move it up. There's resistance for a moment.

Rhett, you see it just a little too late. With an athletics handling check of 26, you are so strong that it can't stop you. But as you go to lift it off the spear, the spear doesn't want that. It moves. The tip of it extends out and down, almost like a grappling hook. And as you move it off, you scuttle the inside of it. As you rip almost the skin of this penguin clean off the spear, and it's inner. It's fell to the ground. As soon as I realize that I'm wrestling with this Ecor spike, I will toss that away, try to push that out of my mind at the same time, and immediately try to wrestle to get to it so that if I can connect with it,

I might be able to suck it up the way I have been with the other smaller fissures. Roll one more athletics contest. Oh, my God. Advantage because you have to do that. Roll it. Nice. Oh man. 26 again. 26. Fucking go.

With a 26, you find this spear. You grab it and you forcibly go to absorb it like you have so many other times to this point. But this belongs to another. You don't absorb it. It stands firm jutting out of the ice. the ice. And as much as your body wants to intake it, wants to bring it in, something pulls back. What is that thing? It's in all of them. What do you mean? It's in all of them. You fucking killed him somehow. Like it erupted from the fucking ice. I look down.

Killed them in frozen place. Are we standing on it? We got to move. We got a fucking move. Now, Laboosh, can you come with us? Can you let go of that thing? Labush. Shoot it! Shoot it as I let go! We just lay into it. I'm going to try to get my hand out of the way fast enough while it still exposed. I'm assuming it might slurp or attack. I just wanted to endeavor to destroy it.

See if I can actually get some other things to blow it apart if I can in that moment. Or if it just stays there, right? Right. It could just... I said mine to acid. So I'm using acid splash. Splash, Essent Splash, what are the cantrip pose?

Yeah. Roll attack rolls at advantage. Poison spray, and acid splash. I'll make two attacks. I can just find it actually on the list. As it was grappled. Oh, 17 enough. 23 for both.

Oh no. Wait. Are you looking at me like that, Mace? It's a dexterity saving throw. Does it automatically fail? It'll automatically fail. Okay. Well, that's a good sign.

Maybe. Seven points of acidity. damage for me. Yeah, 23 to hit for all for both shots. LeBouche, as you let go, all of you lay into it with a cascade of explosive power. Once again, demonstrating just how formidable a force you are. As the, this kicks up an unbelievably cold plume of ice and dust and smoke for a minute. As you all, you all almost disintegrate this land in front of you, and you blow an aspect of the ground clean away.

And you create, once again, like a little, like a cupping in the ground. As the ice clears, you may all roll damage. Okay. Seven for me. 17 over two attacks. Sorry. Oh, no, it was.

12 plus 14 and what? 26. 26 plus 20 is the fuck out of here That's 406 That's what you did Yeah Well gosh I didn't know you're ever doing

I mean I made him sharpshooter attacks Seven is pretty good Like a spray bottle Yeah like I'll set it to like acid I have a big thing and then a flower will kind of Go around the nozzle of my gun and it'll spray acid I know you guys are going on.

As you just level the ground in front of you, the smoke and ice, the shattering clears and disintegrated is the Black Spear. Nowhere to be seen.

It's got me other penguins again. Is it gone? I don't know, but we shouldn't be standing here. We don't want the same thing to happen to us. And it could come up from the ground at any minute. You are in danger. It's different somehow. I'll give one more scan, but let's start fucking moving. And I'll do to the scan again to see if the spikes are still in the other penguins.

You do the same flipping, just out of habit almost. You know that the other frames won't see anything. You turn to leave. And as you flip you see you don't see the six but you see the five other black spears still embedded in the penguins and x-ray frequency and thermal as you turn and just as you're turning to move away as you look out the thermal scans the ridge line and you see one heat signature at the top of the ridge and as your eye flips back off thermal you see a black silhouette standing atop the ridge line look up there see

that too what is going on here you think it's her no you think you heard what she said about this place and how it made her feel is it in the direction that we need to go it is very close to the direction you need to go and you see one other thing in the black silhouette sitting atop the head looks like the shape of a crown. We gotta go now. Come on. Let's go.

And I just... It's gonna be our chaise. Let's go. Oh, I didn't... Now! If it's her, I didn't bring my pink... I didn't bring my pink park up. I didn't go back and get it. I didn't go back and get it. And as you start running towards this silhouette, it moves towards you. But it doesn't run.

It does a slight little hop. And then it looks like it... rides its belly down the mountainside. It's not long before it comes into view. And you see the one thing you didn't see at this gathering of penguins, the one with the crown. And as it pulls up, and it stops and it moves,

standing in front of you with almost like pulsing veins of black energy, deep set, black eyes. Oh, no. With no pupils. It's beak. You see the penguin that helped you most prominently

the last time you were here. Fully corrupted by the black hicker. I need everyone to roll for an issue. Hey, everybody. Chuckled here. It's time for an ad read. This podcast is brought to you by our very own Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash Legends of Adventure and gain access to tons of exclusive perks, including a monthly

movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high feed, shroud over saltmarsh. You can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement, The Crooked Moon, a folk horror's home for Dungeons and Dragons fifth editions and don't forget to snag all of the extra goodies like dice miniatures plushies a tarot deck and more thank you so much I'll see you around I need everyone's initiatives and the map you'll see when the creature spawns will be the furthest point away from me that little like curved inlet is the is the the slide that it comes down are we are we using me or should we create a bigger

here where did the cardboard token go there's this one there's this one is it the huge right he would definitely be huge I don't know huge is pretty much I'm not gonna I'm not size of a giant hold on I'm gonna show off my little rae that I did oh no that one's blank if the size of a horse is large wouldn't Leboos be huge okay yeah he'd be huge but this is large no these are these are What is this? Or horses, I guess horses are pretty large.

That's bigger than five, too much, too. Derek probably just had that. Thank you, nuclear blue, 10 gifted subs. Thank you. Oh, amazing. Nuclear blue. Unreal. Thank you.

I don't know, but how big is huge? Huge is like. Well, no, but if an ogre is what, nine feet? Yeah. How tall is this guy? How tall is a suit? My worker drone, not. I mean, it might be large.

The size of Iron Man's giant, like, Yeah, it's large, actually. Large, actually. Mechanically, it looks like a fucking dragon. Huge is too big. It's like a fucking dragon. This will be ridiculous if it's huge. Oh, they're all sides of those, depending on its age.

So where are we compared to where the slide ends? You would have been walking up this side. So what you have here, and this is probably a little bit too big of a space, but all the well, on the right side is that cliff that falls off into the ravine where you would jettison the wolves before. Hold on, I want to show people at home. The left side.

So hold on, so like, there's a line here. This is the ravine here. This is the ravine here. cliff? Yep. Okay. And then this side is like a something. That's the ice wall that you've been walking along that raises up into your left. And that's where like your blaster burns, all the remnants of your previous journey are etched in that wall. And you're walking that direction. Oh, okay. And the penguin monster has slid down the map at that ramp on the other side. So he is. No, right there. Oh, here. He is. Yeah. release on all guy you know you know miss

he doesn't look like no no he doesn't dart in his eyeballs we have to like oh they already are angry angry eyebrows yeah kill a little and put a couple of like black veins on him oh yeah that's really cool oh it looks so good you know he looks like he looks like he looks like feather McGrath. Oh yeah. Bimmers for Feathers McGraw from

Oh, holy shit, that's great ending. Wallace and Gremitt. They do. Um, okay. And he is kind of cute. I need everyone's initiatives. 22. 25. Fuck you guys.

17. 13. 25. 40 LaBouche, 22. Yep. How far away from him do you want us? Like, um, he would have been coming down kind of to meet you, so you don't have to be super far away unless you think you would have. unless you think you would have been.

Pike and Rhett, what were you guys? You were 13. I'm dead last. I got a 17. So, my wife won't be dead last. I think Feathers McGraw taught me like the true meaning of evil. What the hell? He was so sinister.

Really? And such an evil character that like as a kid, it kind of fucked me up. It was like, he was so dark. Yeah. Like, I got kind of scared watching that movie. What's Feathers McGraw from? He's the, so there's a Wallace and Gromit movie

called Wallace and Gromit and the mechanical trousers or something. And there's a villain that's a penguin pretending to be a chicken, and he has like a red rubber glove on his head. Oh my God. And he's like, he's like a mastermind, like criminal villain. It's insane. It's insane. Does, oh.

Mm-hmm. Does the helmet? Wrong trousers, thank you. Look like it's made it. Does the helmet, does the crown look like? like it's kind of like grafted into its skin at all? Yes. Oh, wow.

It does. Okay. I can battle this too. Is it still? Almost like now what was before it looked like something it had found on the ice placed atop its head. It looks almost like a hideous bone growth that extends from its skull. So it's not a metal crown.

It's bone. He's a penguin. I didn't know. I was gonna for you. This guy's wearing a crown. No, this, yeah. Four and a half. Okay.

I'm ready. It's very cute. Yes. So this dark silhouette that you now know to be the penguin that helped you so long ago slides down the hill on its belly. It pulls up in front of you and writes itself and walks closer.

It looks almost as if it's trying to speak to you as the beak opens and you see it rows of a razor jagged teeth. As it goes to make a noise, the only sound you hear is the sound of drowning as a burbling black liquid gargles in its mouth as it walks closer to you. Chuckles. I will. Feel for remove yourself too.

I just put us kind of like where we would be. Feel free to move. I will walk up and say, you're not a penguin, you're not a penguin at all! As I will take out my large wooden mallet out of my light blue parka, as I will see, actually I need to be, how far away, 60 feet. You might have been in range from behind

if you wanna stay behind us. Well, I gotta get out from out behind you guys. Okay. All right. I trust it. I'll step here. Because I will see maybe a large... Is there like ice on the ground kind of? Yeah, oh yeah, yeah. This is like a sheet of ice with pockets of snow.

So it's not the same kind of like slip, slidey, like every movement you just slide forward. But there's ice. And I'll just spin forward as I'll spin around and around and around and I'll use a side B and I'll let the hammer go. You're going to get wet. A penguin! Oh, God, the kind of top off, as I cast catapult at it, at a third level.

Nice. Oh, my gosh. You produce this wooden mallet with a golden star at the end, and you begin the circle as you twist and twist and twist. Both levels. Yeah, oh, it actually does. Thinking that you're about to throw a hammer at DDD, who invented hammers. Yeah.

Who the inventor of hammers? The inventor of hammer. A dexterity saving throw. Oh. Oh, we're going to mess this guy. Oh. No. 14. We're gonna pang loose.

It fails. It's going to take. You're the worst. Damn, okay. 10, 19, 20 points. 20 points of magical bludgeoning damage. And I am going to just make sure that there's nothing else to it. Yes.

As the hammer will strike into it, 20 points of bludgeoning damage, I need to roll a D8 for my wild magic surge. I'm good. That's my true. Oh, and I'm going to make a bright blue penguin, blue and red penguin balloon holding a hammer, and I will send it towards Lubusha's big suit. As I make, I don't go, da-na, da-na-na-na-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da.

As it floats around you. It's fine. Uh, for our inspiration. That's my. Mm. What's your influence at? What he eight? Oh, I actually don't know. But it should be.

Should be named. Yeah, I think we're my guess. No, D6. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Oh, well, hold on. I'm only bar four.

That's right. I forgot. That's fair. Oh, yeah, because you're split. Yeah, yeah. You took Barb, instead of sorcerer. Uh, yeah, for now. For now.

I will ask the D.A if I think of it. I think I'm going to level up, Barton. I will, seeing this creature and knowing that possibly I may be able to help and absorb this creature, I will race forward. At 50 feet, I can reach the creature without having to double my speed. And so I will get right on top of this corrupted penguin and put my two hands together and just quickly go, attempting to crush the creature. I'll attack twice recklessly.

Roll and attack roll. And you'll see as you bound forward once again, the ground absolutely trembling as you move. As you run up, you can almost see this penguin kind of like the shaking of the ground, like an earthquake, almost hopping as it awaits your arrival. As you close the gap, you would see it in a similar way.

It has also become bigger. emboldened by being enveloped by this power. And it is almost as large as you are, though you still stand taller. It's just you and me! That first is going to... I obviously rage. My first attack is going to be an 18 to hit.

18 will hit? Okay. And then I'm going to make my second attack. That's going to be a natural 20. Nice! So that's going to be one of you. and one of you and one of you.

And we're gonna do a little of this, and we're gonna roll that out. 9, 18, 25 plus 10 is 35 points of damage as I slam into it over and over. And that's my bonus action and action and movement. That's end of my turn. You run up and slamming both your fists down, almost just on either side of its head.

you can feel like a crunching in its shoulders as your giant gauntleted fists crash down upon it It wands as visibly as your blows land And then I need everyone to roll a dexterity savings Oh shit gladly. Dex you say? Dex I said Dexex I said That's a 20. Oh my God. Okay 22 dexterity I got a 24

17 17 17 17 17 17 17. 17. Scooby-Doo. 16. 16. Oh, hold on. No, no, no.

Ah, 19. 19. Oh, ha. Everyone passes. Everyone takes 10 points of piercing damage, as out of the ground beneath you erupts pillars of black spears in the final moments as you can feel almost like

just the slightest quake as the movement occurs under your foot, you all sense it coming. And in lightning reflexes, you're able to dodge out of the way, but even so, the blades strike you passively. You have evasion. You don't take any damage, fine. Yeah, I get out of the way. That was already half.

You miss entirely. I mean, it misses you entirely. The- Like Indiana Jones with the- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Very good. I like the spikes from Prince of Persian. Yeah, that's it.

Oh, I was thinking. more of pride from Full Mental Alchemist. That too. Brotherhood too. Oh, that's what I was thinking. Hell yeah. Now the penguin. The penguin, once again, will take like half a step back, not moving away from you, but just half a step back

before it launches itself forward. It will move kind of diagonally, if it can, it's penguin sliding at you. And it will attempt to move towards If it can, it will hit the whole party. Oh, to like dash through all of us? Yep. Holy shit, that's awesome. Yep. And once again, everyone needs to make

dexterity saving friends. Dexterity said? I presume that you can get an attack of opportunity. Oh, come on. I thought the answer might be no. That's okay. Do we think 16 is good enough? 13? 16. 16. I'm gonna twist.

24 to hit. So it makes. It's, you're a monk, so it's just once. Yeah, because you're a very high chance of passing. I smash it, but it continues to move on the way. 21. 7. Piersons. I'm going to roll this one. But I am able to move out of the way with a 30-20.

Do we get... Do the rest of us get attacks of opportunity if it's passing us? It would just move, like, just to the other side of you and be right there. Well, who's the one in the center, kind of? That's Chuckles. You can take an attack of opportunity. Oh, and I took the war capture feet. Oh!

Let's see. Does whore ever change? Shuckles? Four. It's kind of changing a lot. I mean, there's a lot of new tactic technology. Gosh, I wasn't expecting. I'm not going to let it ride. What did everybody get on the deck say?

21. 11. Dirty 20. Chuckles. Oh, 27. Dexterity, you say? Would he hit Hank? Oh, yeah, he definitely had Hank. Is it just his hitbox? Or is he like...

Would he, like, basically clip both of them? I think you would club both. I think so. Hank's gonna try to dodge out anyway. Not bad. I think that's 17. I think you're okay. For Hank.

The lowest we got was an 11th. I passed the initial attack. I'd certainly fail. The lowest we had was 11 and then a 17. 16 is the DC for Penguin's Lod. Hank passes. Let's fucking go. So anyone that passed

is moves five feet in one. whatever direction they choose to dodge the slide, but we'll take five points of damage. Is that half? I'd say no. Okay. Anyone who failed, I'm presuming just Rhett,

will be knocked prone and take 10 points of damage. All right. I'm just not ready and I'm like all loaded with all this gear. No, no, not again. As I do that, Hank's been being carried by the arm, He like effortlessly just leaps out of the way out of the robotic arms Your arm like subconsciously

Like throw him out of the land You take the hit so that you can save Hank Ten points of damage you're sorry Yep I will reach out as he barrels past me I'm gonna think oh but we never introduced ourselves I'm chuckled as I'm gonna try to cast shocking grasp on him there's no way that hits that is going to be a

We can twist it. 15? Yeah, we got one. We want twist? Yeah, try it. Oh, geez. Hold on, one more. I got tweeds. 16?

16. 16 misses. Oh, that would. Yeah. So. He's a slippery customer. Pike is your turn. Yeah. I'm going to start with multi-attack to make two attacks.

We're under attack. I'm going to start with multi-attack to make two attacks, but then I'm going to use a key point to make two attacks. two fluoride blows for another two attacks. There's gonna be four total attacks. And then I'm gonna have to spend some key points after that, if any of these land. Jeez.

Oh boy. Oh boy. Does a 21 hit? Yeah. Okay. And then one will miss, because I got a two, which is a 10. Okay. And the last one is a 26th hit.

So three of the four attacks will hit. You do so? On the first one, I'm gonna spend a key. The first hit, I'm gonna spend a key point to make it a stunning strike, so I need you to make a Constitution 15 DC saving throw. Con saving throw of DC 15. Rolls a 12th.

All right, so it's stunned. My damage doesn't break, the previous next one won't break the stunt. No, no, no, no. So then the total damage. Do you roll additional damage because it's stunned? No, no, no, it just is. It's, oh.

The rest of my attacks are then advantaged? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, okay, hold on a second. Yeah, you got to fish for crits. When you land your first blow and you empower your body and you connect with the form and you pass your energy through it to stun it, you'll see it take kind of like a, like paralyzed form for a moment. And then its black Eldritch eyes will flash and it'll shake off your stun. Oh.

Legendary resistance. Then I will just keep my roles exactly as they were. then in that case, I won't, no fishing for crits or anything like that. In that case, I got 13 plus 15 is 28 points of damage over three attacks. And they are considered magical for the purposes of resistance and immunities, if that matters. If we hear that again, can we punch. Are we sure something's just thunder?

It's just thunder. It's very loud and long. I would, yeah, I would imagine this thunder. If it's not, we have much. Horse will bring outside and going crazy. So I pepper this thing with two punches and a kick directly. the chin, which it stuns it and then it shakes off. You move up and this penguin

sees you coming and it has its penguin flippers out ready to block, but you move with lightning speed and your first punch is a faint. You dash upwards and your knee connects with the underside of its chin as its paralyzing blow sends shivers down its spine. But it shakes it back off as you land back down on the ground and slam two more punches

into its abdomen. I am knocked down and I'm gonna get up and it's not stunned right it's not so I think I'm going to take I think I'm gonna back up I guess and maybe take an opportunity that's bad idea it's early in the fight yeah oh so I'm backing up You have... So 30, I now have three squares of movements, that's one and a half, two and a half. So he's backing up.

It'll hit. It'll go for a attack. And as it sees you move out of its range, its penguin's beak will open. And then the sound of what is like the sound of tearing leather as its beak will split in half and it's two.

It's four hideous, jagged mandibles almost will open as the cheeks rip back down to its jawline. And this massive toothed maw will open and snap at you. Catching the, catching you mildly. Derek, you need to do the sound that it makes. This is the last thing. time. What is it? That's my favorite. And it would make that sound, except as the

mall is opening up to snap at you, these four almost tendrils of a razor teeth coming at you, the gurgling black sound of drowning is the only thing that meets your ears. As the teeth

don't grab hold of you, but slice at you as you dodge back. And you'll take 13 points of slashing damage. It gets me in the side. Hank, sick him. As I stumble away, he's going to get between me and the penguin.

And I'm going to have him go in first. That'll be my bonus action. That is storing like crazy. We hopefully would always power. Yeah, it'll be fine. You got to be those power, folks. I would lose my mind. I would lose my mind.

So, Hank rolls at 19 plus. Nice. Come on, buddy. And then I go to extras, and it's here. And it's a bite attack. 1D6 plus 3. Poor head.

Max damage, 6, 7, 8, 9 points of years and damage. And if the target is a creature and must succeed on a DC 13 saving fro. What kind of save? Strength. 21. Yeah, it passes. That's it. Oh, and then my action will be,

I'll war up the ether can, I'll take two shots. As Hank bites into the flippers. It's AC as high. They're not gonna be overcharged. Ethercharged. I'm doing right in other here. Oh, stuff.

It's not even worth a twist. I mess both. I'm very round. I rolled a two and a three naturally. Sorry, I'm a mess. It's rough. Hank got a net up. Yeah.

You are, you've been scratched, you were knocked prone, you were cast to the side as the penguin rolled through, and you're just blast, you're worrying up the ether engine as you blast. Back to the top of the round, but what happens next, you can't dodge. As the penguin, now with a taste for blood, enters into a frenzy. And once more, the spears erupt out of the ground. Rett frazzled, a bit of it catches you, piercing through maybe your arm, your side,

chuckles, lubush, overconfident, you are caught. Pike, you were able to dodge out of the way, but by grabbing the tip of the spear, and as you touch it, it forms around your hand and it gives you. You are all momentarily restrained. Real quick, how much damage was it? Does anyone remember that I took? from 13. The bite, 13 points of damage. And while we're doing corrections, the creature should have taken an additional six damage

because I forgot to add my rage. That's, oh, I just saw, I had my rage graph here. How do you want to do this? No, I'm kidding. Oh, let me take what out of here. Yeah, what's the far? Let me take one at the kill. You fuck up on balance, bro.

No, that's ridiculous. It's very far away. It's very far away. Yeah. That's very funny. Yeah. Are we our momentarily restraint. We didn't take any damage?

You'll find out. Oh, nice. You gotta stop being so mysterious. I just need to be it for anything, so enjoy it. For a moment, you all feel and hear the same thing, which is an absence of sound, an absence of touch, an absence of sight, as you are drowned all around you in a dark black sea.

The tendrils pull you in to the ocean's depths. In a moment, you get the sense that something swims around you. Something hunts you. The shiver moves up your spine. And then you hear the roar of an engine and the crashing sound of one gunshot. but five bullets ring out. You snap back out of the Black Sea.

In the center of combat. You're the honors? I hate you. I hate you so much. Like literally in the center? In the center of combat. Next to chuckles. In a flourish.

Oh, fuck. It's like that scene from the office. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, gang. Looks like you can't get anything done without me. Here's to my fans. And in what sounds like one gunshot is actually four. As the bullets rain out in a swirl, they're impossible to track. The black tendrils shatter and you're released. You all take three points of damage. Oh, and I can attack whatever I want, right? Is it

non-magical bludgeoning piercing or? Oh, it's piercing. Piercing. Okay. Piercing. I'll cut it. As he rode up, leaping off of the speeder, in air as he swirles to the ground, you don't even see the flash of silver, the flash of steel as the gun rains its shots down around him. You all hit the ground released. Why aren't you vomiting up oyster shooters? Get out of here. How do you know about that?

Oh. There was a lot of talk. It was very embarrassing for you, everyone, especially you. Oh, that was you guys. I knew you wouldn't play Fair Pike. First race in years. You didn't want to take me one-on-one. I have no idea what he's talking.

It wasn't us. I didn't put them up to using my shellfish allergy. It wasn't us. It was two ladies. It was two ladies. Yeah. They were hot-blown. They were wearing your exact outfits.

This fucking help us kill this thing, damn it? I'm like standing there and like an attack case looking at him in my eyes and the serenance like hanging from my mouth. I'm like I'm very confused. I have no idea what anyone is talking about. And as he lands in the center of combat, his stainless steel revolver in hand, well let's drop this thing then. Chuckles.

Oh, it's me. It's a badass thing. Oh, I mean I can get in line, you're ass. Right. Yeah. Melt wrecks. Melt wrecks like the four soldiers from Starship Troopers when they get hit by the big beetlebone.

I'm going to turn and use every keyboard I have on my next turn on my next turn. It's just going to be like me. Ugh. Oh, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ugh. The speedball is sad. Gosh. Gosh. I mean, I don't have a lot. Bells. You have our

inspiration, so then I am going who does melee attacks? You can give more than one. Inspiration. Hike and Labouche. And Hank. That's what I'm going to do. You're going to inspire Hank.

I'm going to say, watch out, watch out of, watch out Hank. There's some pants shooting perverts around. And Pike, you too. There's only one way to defend against it. And if you want to avoid perverts, you should probably inflate yourselves.

Oh, that's the opposite. Oh, well. I'll whip out my bike. My tire. I will twin spell. shoot over to Hank and to Pike and cash in large. What? This isn't the first time you've done this to me.

Both of you will grow large, and you will deal an additional. Oh, hell yeah. In large or deuce. I stop on Rex. There's more mind. I pop his head off like a pez dispenser. Grab one of the other order.

I leal, Rex. You have Vandon strength checks. strength checks and strength saving throws and all of your weapon attacks deal an extra 1d4 damage. Oh, perfect. For both hang. Oh my gosh. And for the other side doesn't have an illustration on it. There you go. And if you don't mind me, I'm getting away from this pervert. And so, enlarger juice. And then with that extra bit, I will I'm going to send over a balloon sparrow over to fly around a pike. And so you barked inspiration as well.

That's what he says. And I need to cast, I need to roll my wild magic surge. I'm good. Okay, I got to remember I have inspiration as well. Jeez, a lot of stuff. Saturn eats his son, Rex. No! Oh God, they're so imperfect.

LaBeech, Leboos, speaking of perverts, that's your turn. I mean, Hague, watch out. I will. There are perverts everywhere. I will leap over Pike,

even though he is so massive, I will leap over pike and make it the 50 feet to here. And landing next to the creature, I will continue to pommel it, giving it one punch and then another. as I dig in and we'll see how that goes. Yikes. One and a three. Your advantage though.

Yeah, one of the three. Twisted me. Yeah. Yeah. Twist the barbarians attacks. Another one? That's crazy. All right, the first attack was not meant to be.

Second attack. Natural. Oh, yeah. Making up for it. Making up for it. So that's gonna be two of these guys. that's gonna be 16 plus 5 is 21 plus two rage damage is 23. And I will, am I, do I get a feeling

that I'm doing any of the same absorption that I've been doing with these smaller fissures from before? Like when I hit it, am I getting the blood hitting my hand and I can sort of get some extra goo in me? Am I feeling empowered at all or is it, this is different and sort of, and somehow like hardened and separate.

Roll an insight check. I would be happy to. Give me a 13. You get the sense that as you're striking this creature and blood is coming off of it. It does look like it's taking a beat in. You get the sense that you are not absorbing energy from it. As you are striking it, it is firmly within control

of this area's. corruption. I'm just doing damage. Correct. Okay. It's just you and me, creature. Let's go! And I continue to pummel in on it. And you pummel it. It's at this point, as

you're hitting it, it kind of as you land two blows into both of its sides. It pauses for a minute and starts to do this. As it waves back and forth as it stands. And

That's interesting. I like that a lot. If you wanted to roll a D6, if you want to use your barter Concerbration, you could still possibly have your first stack. No, it was a one-three-one. Three plus eight. Is 11. Plus six. Oh, it would have to be a six- No, no, no, no.

Yeah, save it. Might be better for a saving throw, you know. Roll group perception check. Gosh. Oh, not very good. Oh, 26, baby. Let's go. Huge. Got a 19. 11. 15. Man, playing a sorcerers. Who would get that right?

All right. Asteroids fall. Comments falls. I'm saying it's a lot of work. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of things. It's a lot of math. Yeah.

Yeah, it's a lot. It's, um, hell of God. You sense it before you hear it or you see it. Or you feel it. You know what he's summoning. And from behind you, over the hill line, almost like popsicles, the penguins march. And the frozen penguins rapidly approach you,

completely unmoving as they close the gap, riding the black spears. And each one will move to one of us? Yeah, well, you just take all of them. Yeah. I'm handing them out one of the time. Oh, that's how I miss one.

I was going to say. So five, only five. I do have five. Now, we'll spawn on the field. One of you, one on each of you. So no hand. Oh, no. You can put one on wrecks.

These are like penguin corpse puppets. And it's almost like when a, when a structure moves at the carnival. And it just kind of like, is stuck as it moves from one side to the other. Do we have a six? You do not have a six because you destroyed five of them. That's right.

Oh, sick. And they all are frozen in this horrific, happy memory as they will all dash up and strike down at you one at a time. And so it's just at everybody. Probably. We'll do one at a time. I'll just do the initiative. Also, Chuckles L'Bush, Pike, Rat. And Rex.

And Rex. And, thanks. Thank you. 19. To whom. Chuckles. Olobush is 10. Pike is, what is that? 15.

Miss. Rat is 20. Miss. Damn. What? He's got 21 AC. God. Fine.

Fine. So just chuckles then We'll chuckle. We'll take eight points of damage As these penguins roll up And as they're stuck in these movements One throwing, the spear moves and rotates them As in its cast of throwing a snowball

The outstretched arm moves down And strikes you with an open palm And then the penguin once again will strike twice. The first at Hank around it, the second at whoever is on its left from my orientation. Labouche is closest in that day. Okay, so Labusch and Hank. No. Oh my god.

We'll say that was a Labouche, natural 20. Okay, ooh. And then a 17 to hit Hank. I think that barely hits. It's attacking Hank? It's attacking you and Hank. Okay, just a minute. So you...

Because it makes a creature within five feet of me makes an attack against a target other than you, I can use my reaction to make a melee weapon attack against the attacking creature. So when it goes after Hank, I'm going to endure the hit that it did on me, and then I'm going to get a net dirty 20 to hit. And so I'm going to do an additional

2, 7, 9 points of bludgeoning damage as I knock its kidney in response to its attack. It unfurls its terrible penguin maw and once again that sound of tearing leather as its flesh separates and opens. Great, great. The maw closes around you and rips back. You take 24 points of slashing damage

and you do not. not have resistance to it. Oh, thank you for telling you that. That's unfortunate. The, then the attack goes to Hank. Hank will take eight points of slashing damage as it turns around and its maw chomps him as well. And as it makes its turn, Laboosh, you find your opening

and you level a thudding blow into its side. Once again, how much damage you do? I told you how much damage I did, and the answer was, nine? It was nine. It was two plus five plus two. Yeah, it's nice. I missed it.

I am here. No, it's nine. Two plus two. I remember because I was annoyed that I rolled a two on my D12. Got, okay. And I totally forgot to put him up here.

Rex? He started at the top of the round unless you're putting him somewhere else. That was more like cinematography. That's fine. That was fine. Put him right in front of Pike. Yeah, right in front of Pike.

Yeah, right in front of the bike. 100%. No, actually he falls, he falls here. He's a fast guy. Holy shit, this is one hell of a situation you got down here. He misses. He fires out after he's gotten there. He clicks the hammer on the revolver twice,

as he fires out two bullets, but once again, only the echoing sound of a single shot fills the valley. as his bullets fly to either side of the penguin. And Pike. I'm going to do the exact same thing. I'm going to start by using a key point to flirt with a blow to blows, which gives me four attacks,

but I'm rolled them individually this time because I'm going to try to stunning strike this thing again. 20 to hit. 20 hits? I'll spend a key point to stunning strike, so a con saving throw of 15. 12. He fails.

So first I'll just roll the damage for that first attack. As you strike and your energy courses through its form, for a moment, you see this look in its eyes is almost like it's trying to summon the power, but it just makes that same dark, drowning, burbling noise. And it is stunned.

Yes, okay, so the first one's gonna be 11 points of damage. Now the next attacks, three attacks will be at advantage. Definitely hits, definitely hits, definitely hits. So it's gonna be five, 11, 12, 13, 14 and then v4s 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 20 through 24 plus 15 is 39 points of damage oh let's go so I land all four blows and my fists are just flashing with uh magenta orange yellow light as I'm connecting uh with my fists in my hands absolutely raining blows down on this thing and it's no longer bigger than I am I'm I'm basically

totally toe-to-to-to with it at this way. You're now large and you're just cascading, thundering blows down, but not with reckless might, with precision skill. As your first blow lands and says a shiver through its body, then everything that follows finds an opening, finds a weak point, and you deliver an absolutely brutal cascade of damage. You're stunned until the end of my next turn. Rhett, it is to you.

I will turn and I'll see this thing saying, Hey, buddy, keep going, I got you. And I'm going to, you'll see from my canon, a pinpoint beam of purple energy will shoot at Hank. And it's like from Overwatch when Zarya, like if somebody a bubble, sort of a very faint kind of gravity bubble around Hank appears. And I'm going to use wording bond on him.

Nice. Oh, I love that. him in AC, plus one to saving throws, and then he and I will share damage if he gets hit. And then as a bonus action, he will then and he'll lunge and he will attack the stunned. Does that go both ways if you take damage,

he takes it half into the internet? No, it just feeds one left, yeah. Oh, so close. It hits, and it's going to do an extra D4, right? Because he's also enlarged. Yes. Oh my gosh. Let's go.

Six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve points of damage. And it needs to make a, I don't know if it can, make a strength saving throw. When it's stunned, I don't know, I'd have to look at this. Does it automatically fail strength in decks? That would be nice. Hold on the stunting conditions here. It can't move.

Automatically fails strength and decks. Let's go. Against the creature have advantage. It takes up to six. Stunt is amazing. So in total, a six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, and then thirteen, fourteen, and that's three piercing damage, and the penguin is now grappled in Hank's jaws. How much did it?

13? It was 15 total. 15 total. Yeah. Okay. So the whole hit was 15. And then the escape DC if he wants to spend an action is 13. Okay.

as Hank bites down into the flippers once again of this penguin. And chuckles, top of the round. Oh, gosh, it's been my turn already. I am going to, I'm going to peel back around here. Firebolt. No, it better be lightning bolt because you also kill Rex. That's very funny. This is my new answer for my favorite reaction by players to something I'm done.

Pointer bolt. You have no idea how seriously I consider just turning and moving all 50 of those damage points on Rex instead. I'm going to go here. And I am going to put a line here. So all four, including Rex. Yes! Including Rex is going to have to make a dexterity saving throw. as I still have my gun set to flower.

I said, okay. Oh, no. Oh, I can't avoid you, Rex. Oh, I don't have the clear shot. I probably shouldn't take it. Which one is the real, which one is the real? And I cast Tosh's caustic brew here. All four need to make a dexterity saving throw.

Oh, pass. Full of your trip. Not five. No, no, no, stop. It's all long enough. That's fine. All right. Ever since the first time I had to do it in the

Witchlight Special that we did right after Maggie was born, I was like, I need to be better in doing troubles. Let me just one second. I don't know what class Rex is, but I have a feeling is. High Dex. Yeah, Rex gets a 22. Nice. I'll just roll all these.

I'm casting it at a third level. Okay. Okay. And you're like firing down the line at the frozen. So you're four, three, and two. I try to coat with my acid gun. As it'll spray. Not acid. Oyster. Oyster gun. Oyster gun.

And so they'll just be coated in acid if they fail. Okay. All of the penguins fail. At the start of each of their turn, they will take 64 acid damage. Okay. 6D4. Does anything happen to Rex? Presumably he passed.

No, he dobs out of the way, it's fine. I'm going to... That's a lot of damage. Just according to plan. I am. I trigger my wild magic. As you fire out the first and Rex goes to dodge out of the way.

Turn Rex and go a plan. They're so pretty. Eight. That's going to be bad. Oh, gosh. No, I'm sure it's fine. That's going to be. a nightmare. No, I'm sure it's fine. Hold on, sorry. Oh. Why is it not loading? Your eyes pop out of your sockets like a cork gun and just

dangle there. Wild. I had it even pulled up and it just wasn't suddenly unloaded. The creature of your choice dies instantly. I'm truth-ricks. It's not that bad. It's not that bad. You cast fireball at a third level. Center on yourself Oh Get the shit Where's the fucking shit We got to rotate it

It's got to be over there Oh my god I get acid on you Hold on I had the hanky for that Hold on I miss and I'll reach into my coat To pull out a handkerchief As I am going I'll pull out a bomb Uh oh

It's gonna clip me but it's gonna hit one in three Hold on and you'll see As you pull out this bomb, Rex will go. Hey, watch your point in that thing. And as he dodges out of the way and you shuffle for your objects and you find what you're looking for, you produce this bomb that is this strange off red, and you'll see for just a moment before it explodes right in your face, this strange square-toothed grin.

Uh-oh. Imprinted on the bomb. That wasn't supposed to happen. What's the DC? The DC should be 16. I got a 19, I take nothing. Yeah, you take nothing. Oh my God.

Evasion has been so good. Wow. It's fine. 10, 15, 15, 15, 20. This actually worked out perfectly. Except for chuckles. 25th. I got a roll.

You're going to dex your own. Oh, I pass, so I'll take half of 26 points. 13 points. 13 fire damage. Of fire damage. So three, two, and one, they have to make deck 16 as well. Do they take half damage on... So it's 26 fail. As the blast moves out, the explosion, you almost hear this faint on the wind.

It's hard to tell if it's howling winds moving through the valley. or the cackling laugh of something lost in another space. The flames will erupt out as the explosion of the bond expands, and you will melt the penguin pops as they still stand straight up, impaled on the spikes, but they will slump down no longer holding their stance. And you can move them off the map, obviously. Thank you. We'll get you the regulator, right?

That actually worked out pretty well. I'm like a Looney Tunes character. You're a shot in the face. I'm covered in sun. Your hair is like my hair is actually. Exactly. Oh my God. Covered in so.

And then I will use bonus action to get convert sorcery. It spells a lot of sorcery. It spells a leger source points. Nice. I know that you can do that, so that's fine. I am aware of how that function is so I'm aware. I definitely mechanically understand that. Labuch.

I will see that. We'll see that Hank has hopefully held this nightmare creature in place. And seeing that, I'm going to harden my fist. Instead of doing these pummeling smashes that I normally do, I'm going to almost like T-1000 my hand into like a cutter blade, where it's a thin, sharp cutting edge. I'm going to attempt to shave off. I'm flavoring bite from the beast form so that I can hopefully heal as I also attack from it.

I'm reducing my D12 to a D8, but I'm hurting and I would like to not be hurting anymore. So I'm gonna attack twice. Shit. That's going to be 24 to hit, and that's going to be a more than that to hit. And so with 2D8s, I'm going to do six plus five is a 11.

11 plus 1 is 12, plus 117, plus 4 is 21. 21, and I will also take healing from that. So 21 points of damage for my two attacks, and I don't have anything to do with my bonus action, so I'll just hang out here. How do you wanna do this? Wow. Barbarians, folks.

I hardened my hand into like scissors. And seeing this creature, I, I am like rappled by Hank, I'm going to go in with a side swipe like this and basically, if you've ever gotten that perfect zone where you have scissors running up a wrapping paper, I'm going to sheer it in half, and what's left of it, I'm gonna catch like a tarp

and pull in through my mouth hand. Jesus. You plant your feet into the ground. You are just shy of gargantuan. You can feel the pulsing energy of the ether engine as it courses through your suit. You feel the power that's been gifted to you from this space. As you have gone cosmic janitor and cleansed the wound of this world, you wore your fist back. It changes into the form of a sharpened blade.

And as it does, as you choose that sharpened form. the extension of your arm will turn jet black. As you lunge it forward, you hear a ringing crash throughout the valley. Don't worry, guys, saved ya. As the gunshot of Rex pierces the head of this penguin, and it falls to the ground dead. Oh, jackass.

How long does the enlarge spell last? A minute. A minute. It's plenty of time. I rip Rex in two. Just got a micro forearm. Your like,

scissors punch extension flies just over the top of the penguin as its falling back, gunshot wound to the side of its head. Are these two guys still alive? Are they dead? Oh, those are the acid guys, right? Yeah. They're dead.

Okay. They're super dead. Yeah. Yeah. I'm frantically looking underneath me to see if there are spikes coming up or where this extension may have withdrawn to, not believing that just because we cut off a finger that we're in any kind of safety. What do you mean it's dead? It's going to be returning at any moment. I mean, was that the fucking penguin or is there something bigger beneath us?

I think it may be underneath Is it all one giant Superorganism? I don't know what you guys are freaking out for I mean a shot it, it's on the ground dead Not another word out of your mouth Unless it's you telling us what you were drilling for Whoa!

Testi Listen, why don't we just resolve this first And then we'll talk We put our differences aside and we save one of the only places we've called home. How does that sound to you? What were you drilling for in the ice? I told you before, and it wasn't a lie.

I found something when I hit the boss's safe. He had something that said there was a treasure of great importance, great power, locked behind this wall on this planet with coordinates. and I went there to find what it was. I started drilling I could barely cut through until you guys showed up and tried to take me in. I don't know exactly what it was.

Well, whatever's behind the ice is now flowing in a horrific black river all over this place. It's coming from the temple. I don't know if you saw it when you were coming in. I saw it. Something's oozing out of that. space. I don't know what we do, but I think if we got to hit it at its source, we could shut it down. I've hoped that every bit of this thing would be absorbed by me on the planet, but this proves

there are little guys and big guys. You might yet have your opportunity. Who knows what lies beneath the ice. And the spikes still are wrecked out of the ground holding the penguins there as they fall limply. Some burned some chewed away by acid.

The spikes recede as the penguins fall to the ground dead all about you. As the larger penguin hits the ground the kingwin, as he lands on the ground,

And Rhett, you'll see, just say you're looking through your x-ray eye looking for what's happening, you'll see the spikes will recede back under the ice up into him. And as that happens, the form of the king-go-win will melt and pool into a large black pond. The moment that happens, I sort of hesitate for a moment. but imagining that it may empower me to fight harder next time but also that I'm trying to destroy something

that has put so many including my friends in danger I'll reach down and press my palm into the pool and attempt to absorb it holy shit and as the kingwin falls to the ground and that black pool forms that

sensation that's lived at the back of your spine, that tickle, finally recedes a moment's of calm, moments of peace, as LaBouche plants his palm into the larger black pond. The liquid turns your arm jet black as tendrils swirl about you as it starts to to form a whirlpool. This is the largest absorption you've made as it starts to suck into your arm for a brief moment your entire arm shoulder to fingertips turns jet black and for a flash of an instant something hard forms around it but not long enough to sense what it is or to even catch a good look at it. You absorb this full power. Mechanically When you strike

You may roll an extra damage die And your AC increases by one Holy fuck Wow While I'm watching this happen I will You know point out the Spikes and maybe the holes that they left behind in the ground

I'll look direct and I'll say As we move to the temple Watch your step Stay light on your feet We don't know when those things are gonna jump up and get you Yeah you too Look like you got clipped a little there.

I checked my hand to see if there's any lasting damage from where I had grabbed it to like push out of the way. You look and you were actually so definitely able to move out of the way. It never really struck you.

It's just as you went to push off of it to move firmly away, it formed around your hand gripping you. So you have no damage. But almost like this sensation of you know, dipping your hand, and ice cold water, like it kind of burns almost.

Yeah, stiff. Yeah, like freezer burn. Come on. Let's get a move on. All right, well, maybe you lead us through the eyes. Just keep your eyes open. I'll be right next to you. I can take care of the little guys.

All right. Yeah. We're all a little rough up. My hand is crying. You love the bomb. And anyone grows from this? Oh, is it like a cartoon bone? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Until you let grow up in. I'll blow in another hand of motley and flesh, of glove flesh will pop out. Yeah, good job. Dodging that, Red. Good job. Yeah, watch where you're aiming that next time. Probably you've really saddled up with just a stone, cold group of weirdos. What does it sound like

that's a perverted thing when you say it? Anyways, let's go blow up the planet or whatever. Do you think that was my ex-wife saying that she's like, she's changed? What?

Never mind. I lead the way to the temple. And I keep my eyes out for anything that movement's sensing the ground trying to see like if, you know, shit moving below beneath us. I try to lead the way the best I can

and point things out. Yep. Roll a survival check. Oh. Uh-oh. I have a feel I'm going to cash in on this inspiration before it runs out here. Yeah, I'm going to use it. I'm going to use it just because it's going to run out anyway.

Oh, there's a special effect. Okay. 14 plus 4 is a total of 18. With an 18. Unless something else happens from like, like saying. I'm assuming I'm normal. You get to roll it twice and choose what she use. Hell of you have it, yeah

20 total With a 20 You survey the land Around you, you've made this track Just once before And you You start to make your way

One foot in front of the other Quiet Except for the The resounding, thundering steps Of Labouche as the ground shakes beneath every football. You make your way, and as you do,

collecting small pocket of visher here and there, relatively uneventful, until the temple comes into sight. Stretching out in front of you, that same open, frosted runway. leading right up to the temple doors. In the distance you can see what looks like almost a river running out from the center of the door. Something else, a little bit of color closer to it. But it's hard to see from here. As you make your way forward

and you take every additional step, you make your way towards the entryway of the this place. A flowing black river moves on your side. As you get towards the mouth of this temple, just at the opening of this doorway, a little bit of thaw has occurred around it. And at the entry, around the stairs, extending out in front of it, not very far, but a field of dandelions. I should avoid the river, yeah? I can't even begin to imagine what would happen if you tried to absorb all that. Why are there flowers? I'm afraid to ask. That's where dandy commune with the planet.

Is it right there? Is that fair to say? Yeah. Oh man. Does it look like the flowing river of this stuff is running the running the... is running through this area that she communed with the land? Looks like it's cut through it. Okay.

All right. But around it, it's kind of like, it's almost like a large, not quite large, but a solid embankment on either side, but a sizable river that runs by. If you were really trying, you could probably running, like, leap over it. It's not immense. But on either side of it, this river's cut through. a field of dandelions and a thaw kind of around the entrance of the temple. Dandy did this?

I can't believe they're still here. Yeah. Speaking of, where are the other two? Still enjoying waffles? No, they're gone. Gone? Yeah, they're gone. Danny's got to come back, though.

She's just like on a trip to like, I don't know, do some stuff with dynos. She'll be back. There is still hope. I'm gonna reach down, and even though my hand would be absolutely, like, massive, I'm gonna try to very delicately pick up one of the dandelions and, like, find somewhere that I can put it on my person to keep that with me. Roll a Dex check. I feel like Iron Golden and Rose from fucking Minecraft right now.

now. Or slight of hand, whatever. 10 minutes? One or the other. It's at least 10, for sure. Has it been 10 minutes? Has it been 10 minutes? Is it some bark inspiration?

Yeah, if it's all right, I'll throw my cat. You can roll twice. Take the higher. And take the higher. Oh, I don't know. It's been nine minutes and 59 seconds. Perfect. Yep. That's going to get me to 17.

with a 17, almost like a giant gorilla trying to pluck a single flower, you get in with your index and your thumb, you're able to get around it relatively delicately that you do upend a flower or two and you're able to pluck out a dandelion. Let's keep going. If we can find the source,

then perhaps I can take it out. I would lead the way as I can keeping my, you know, eyes open to try to point things out as we enter further in to this temple ruins. And you keep your awareness as you move forward. A very similar sight unfrozen front of you. You walk up just a couple steps as you enter the temple. You walk down just a couple sets on the other side. and you actually see that this river is almost blown up through the floor as it's running the water is pouring vertically upwards from below

as it's moving out the front and down the steps in front of you you see that same familiar bridge that extends to the other end of the room and you see the now defunct and broken, blown up, I think, destroyed elevator. You now know elevator on the other side of the room. So we're able to walk like to the side of it without touching. Correct. Yep. It's not like terribly wide, but it's not like a trickle either. It is definitely what seems to be a pouring of this darkness.

We have a problem. Yeah. Not only is the elevator busted, but if the water or goo or whatever that is, is geysering up out through the caverns below, it's all filled up. I'm going to approach the edge if I can and look down. And as I do, I'm going to turn to Rex and I'll say, I want you to realize you're fucking responsible for this. I'm responsible? How am I responsible? You knocked me out. If you hadn't fucking been here. We never would have followed you here. Oh, so it's my fault that you were hunting me for a bounty? Yeah, it's your fucking fault. You're a dirty thief and you had mining buffs.

Hey, who does that? I'm extremely clean. Look at this. And his belt and his belt buckle sparkles. One of the buckles he got while he was in the shop when you attempt to honeypot him. Didn't attempt you successfully honeybotted him. Wait, if you really that clean? If you were really that clean, why would you be rolling around?

Are we in the field of flowers? Or where are we in the ice? No, we're inside the temple. You're moved inside the temple. We're inside the temple. Why would you be rolling around in the dirt and the grime and all the ooze? I can't suggest it on them. I love this.

Oh, my God. Oh, God. But also, totally. If we hadn't shown up, he would have just done it himself. I mean, he didn't have a way. He's a fuck-up. What a sense? fuck out. DC-16.

Is it wisdom? Shit. I should memorize these spells. You have dreads. Don't forget. Is it 18 for Wiz? Oh. That passes. It's 14 for end. If that's... It's Wiz. Damn.

Oh, you got to draw my wild magic. Maybe I'll explode on this guy. Quit trying to explode on me. Okay. Well, I don't know why you would be doing that. Clearly not. Would you know that you're casting that?

I don't think they know. Okay. Hold on. Maybe they do. So it's basically can he perceive that he was like using the arcane magics to do it? Oh, it doesn't actually say. But for suggestion that it's not that explicit, like once it ends. Right.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Like they know you've charmed them. Like charm friend or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. While that's happening, I'm approaching the edge and looking straight down.

You do so. You approach the edge and you look straight down. Roll an investigation check. Oh, that's where I'm a wagon. Not bad. That is a 23. 23. You look down and with a 23, we'll say,

you engage your eye. Otherwise, you'd be looking down into what would feel like pretty much obscure darkness towards the ground. But as your eye does zoom in and you look, you get the view of the icy ground floor. And from where you were, when you went to the bottom of this cavern the last time, you get the sense that it's probably about 200 yards down. Not a jump that you'd want to make. It is not covered in black Iker. But you can see it running from the ice wall

around the room and up the side of the wall. Oh. But does it look like this is the bottom of the pit, right? And it's running through the middle. like we could just go down on this side and not like land in it. Yeah, there's definitely a side you see. You could find a path should you choose like the correct wall to go down where you would not, if you went just straight down,

you would not land in it. It's defying all the fucking laws of gravity. What do you mean? This fucking goo. It's running from that crevice out across the fucking room and straight up. Like it has a mind of its own.

Should we see where it's going? Should we climb up there? Damn. When you were flying around, did you see where the river ended? It... So it's pouring out... To tell us.

Pouring outside. Into the world. And it does end in kind of like a large pool outside. Okay. You read my mind. I was going to ask you if you thought it was sentient. I don't know. I mean, this planet has a fucking, some way to target Laboosh and head towards him.

Maybe like, it's like, whoa, you're our cousin. Because I'm ooze and you're ooze. We're all ooze. Yeah. Yeah. Are you saying that this planet followed your friend here to the raceway and then rained death and destruction on top of it? Yeah. Sometimes when we show up to places. The entire planet is destroyed. What of it? And you think I'm the bad guy.

You are the bad guy. And everywhere you go, people die, huh? Well, not everywhere. Just to Night and Zale with the Spooky Boys and to the Prismatic Pathway. And of course, this planet. Oh, yeah, no. LeBuch's, I mean, Convita's friend died on, oh, yeah, everywhere we go, people die. I've said no.

This is my prison fucking deduction. All right? I don't know anything for God damn sure. I know we get fucking visions. I know there's all sorts of black ooze and it feels like we're fucking drowning. Can we get down there? Yeah, we can get down there.

I don't know what we're going to do when we get back to the crack and the ice, but we got to get closer. I can take a quick look. I can just walk. Down. No, just everybody. Come on this side.

We're not going to land in the river. Come here. Gather around. When we get down there, it's there. Any way we can destroy the source. Well, that's going to be up to you. And I'll turn a few knobs on my cannon and it'll start to whirbs. And I'll point at the ground and it's like, like wave, we'll go.

And when it sort of emits from the canon, you'll feel a little lighter as I cast featherfall on up to five targets and there's five of us. Beautiful. So gravity has been lessened in our incredible. Now all we got to do is take a leap of faith. I'll be the first. And I'll say you've definitely done this before in our travels. Yeah, 100%. Watching him step off.

With both my hands in my pockets, I would just like casually step off and follow Reddown. Yeah. Hank would jump into the cannon and they'll grab him. Oh, I thought Hank was just gonna be. There? No, we gotta be!

Paul! We're gonna hurt it. Yeah, that's cool. In a little jet. And I will grab Hank and I will, I'll walk off and float down. I dispel Rex's. I dispel Rex's. Sweet.

Oh wow aether tech hell of a thing And Rex will also step off the edge This is my favorite part I'll jump into the air and kind of do one of the use floating on my side Casually yeah So it only lasts a minute crossing your legs, it only takes a minute for us to get down there I'll jump up as well just after Rex and I'll just be like Poh-lugia Poc-lugi into his hair

You manipulate the gravity of this space and everyone can feel the pole as you're brought downwards but it's a familiar float to all of you as you make a gradual descent and as you do you can see the ground start to come into shape you can see from where the elevator is that same section of open stairway you see the ice wall at the other edge still the blaster marks still the giant chunk cut out of the center But the hole that was there previously when you've investigated has eroded to become quite larger. And as you're falling slowly, you see the black river pouring out of its mouth through the center of the room, towards the wall, up the edge to the bridge, splitting through the bridge and out into the world.

As you move down, I need everyone to make a wisdom saving throw. Oh yeah. And you are dreaded. Oh boy. I'm okay. Natural one. Natural one. Natural one. Natural one. Damn, I got a three. Natural three. Natural three. So that ends, oh boy. I got him four. Natural four. Oh, you're fucked dude. Seven total. Uh, hold on. I got a yeah, five total. As you're descending, you all feel a familiar sensation, like pressure in the air around you. The last words you hear are Rex saying, oh, you get, does anybody else feel that?

And then, chuckles. Oh. You see a woman. with long auburn hair about her shoulders standing at the top of an altar. A llama corn splayed across it. She drags a knife across its throat and spills its blood into the ground. You fall to your hands and knees and as she does it, her hair gathers about her head, about her head forms into two spikes that jut out from either side and turns bright blonde.

Rhett, a scarred battlefield, death and destruction all around you. You lay on your back on the ground. A piece of your face blown off. your arm missing the agony immeasurable as a Sorian warrior walks up to you to finish the job pike you stand looking out surrounding you a field of flowers you look up at a tower you look up at a tower that stretches up into the heavens. It sits atop a floating rock. At its peak, a burning bright energy of light.

And you think I should tend the lighthouse. LaBouche, you see all manner of people around you. I'm sorry. You find yourself beneath the ocean's waves in a dark black sea. You don't feel, you don't see, you don't sense, but you swim, you circle, and emanating from you, an unmistakable, brilliant glow as you all land on the ground. No, no. It's not... Are you all right? Are you all right?

I'm okay. Are you all right? Yeah. They're just visions. It's not real. It can't be. What the hell was that? As we get closer to whatever is at the core of this, we... Things can get a little weird. Oh... Rex. Rex.

Yeah, chuckles. I miss my wife, Rep. I miss her a lot. Man, this guy is a downer. You travel with him all the time, punk? You shut up. Yeah, if you're any... I'll be back.

If you're lucky, he's gonna save your life. Well, just ten minutes ago, he blew himself up. Anyway... Fucking sore hands. It's fine. It's fine. Whatever you do, don't touch that crap, okay? Yeah.

Noted. Well... Sorry. No, I would just like one hand on Rhett's shoulder like nod at him and start to like slowly creep forward towards this horrific crack in the ice. Giving the, giving this flowing river a wide berth. Mm-hmm. And I'm still in my, like, huge armor,

and I'm gonna like, stop forward and, uh... Are you sure you want to go first? I can check it out. You say the fuck away from it. Back all the way to fuck up, you understand? Maybe like the other fissures, I... His river. It could bump me up.

Yeah, but look at the fucking size of it! And it doesn't look like it's slowing down anytime soon. Take a look. But if you need my help, You call. Let's go. Check it out. Yeah.

I'll rattle around in my side pack and I'll pull out a vial and I'll hit the plunger into one of my ports. All right. So you depress the plunger now. Let's go. I will be behind Pike, but not just a couple steps behind. And I'm moving forward, but with purpose and caution. As I get as close as I possibly can to this crack without getting, without touching the river.

As you move up, you see that there's a little bit of a raise, almost like a hill, as it goes up to the opening and the ice. This is not enormous, but it's a large circular opening. That looks like, there was much smaller the last time you were here, but it looks like the force of this ooze expunging out from behind this space has forced it to, widen. There is a crack that runs vertical, but the split centrally where you would walk in is enough to avoid it without any missteps, and you make your way up and into the hole and the wall. As we get closer, I'll raise my gauntlet in hand, my right hand, and with the shape

of a gun that I've done so many times before, but at the tip, just a little ball of, you know, light will form and the light moves from magenta to orange to yellow back to magenta as I cast light and just a little bit of radiant light will help light up the area about 20 feet around me as I keep that little ball of energy just at the tip of my finger as we move forward. Pulsating technicolor glow emanates from your finger as you draw the power straight to the tip. It illuminates the hole in the wall as you move forward. You make your way.

Is everybody, are you just you two guys? I was gonna follow after them. I'll be next to trickles. You make your way down through this opening and the ice. All the while, being extremely careful to stay to one side or the other.

Not wanting to slip and fall into the cascading movement. You continue on, and it begins to slope downwards slightly. This previously was maybe a 10-foot space into the wall behind it. It now extends. You walk 10 steps, 20 steps, 50 steps, deep into the underground behind this, when eventually you see this,

pouring out from one more deep drop in the ground. A larger cylindrical opening, shrouded in darkness, that once again the water is climbing up and out. Damn it. It goes even deeper down. Well, fuck. Abush? Yes.

You feeling all right? I feel fine. But we can't see down there. Like it's just dark. It's just dark. Well, I can get us down there again, but we don't know what we're dropping into. Or how deep it is.

Can we drop something shiny and glowing down there? Yeah. Technically I can, but it'd be way cooler if red did that. And it's totally not in my style. I pick up Hank. No! Oh! And from a mechanical sense, I'm going to use an fuse item.

But what I'm going to do is I'm going to pull out just this little kind of metal contraption. And it's sort of like a flare, right? Yes. But it's, yeah, maybe it's sort of like a stick. Not the light worm from Dune Part 2. It's just that. It's a light or for Duke Part 2. Does it lie over in Doom Part 2?

I hold it out and I hit it, I press a button, and it floats in midair and it sort of starts to glow this, this pale white, but there's a hint of purple light, and then it will just descend down as it goes down. It casts its light as long as it can. What is it, does it just... Basically, I'm infusing like a rock. If this is a B and D, I would infuse a rock

with like the glowing option for my... You cast this glowing or down into the opening. It shines its light until it strikes the ground. Oh. And as you look down, you see another large drop. but the rock

sits there you cannot see what surrounds it you hit a ledge is there a but we can see that there's ground where there is no river

yes all right well at least we know we can land safely does the side of the wall look like does the side of the wall look climbable? Like, how sheer is

this drop? Could I start to... It's magical tinkering, not the fuse item. You could try. Gotcha. I could, uh, kick into the wall, punch my way down, and you could use my punches as handholds.

Well, that also raises a good point. We all have to make a decision here. Because getting back is not going to be easy. So if anybody wants out, I look at Rex now's the time I came here to complete a mission save the pathway there's no turning back now me too all right gather around oh you again we all feel later again so I think it only lasts like yeah yeah

last a minute so as soon as I do the thing I will as quickly as we can I'll nod and I'll step out and you flip down. Like the Sartar to car from Dune. Mayor Blaine chip and shatidded. Yes. Once again, everyone leaps off as you make your way slowly down

this opening. Pike, for just a moment, as you enter the opening and you descend down, you hear a crackling over comms. But just a crackling, nothing comes through.

I would like tap to see if I'm like getting anything. You tap, you tap. Static for just a moment, and then dead silence. I would look to Rhett and be like, hey big guy, keep an eye on your instruments and such. I'm getting some weird feedback. All right. Do I see anything?

Anything off? You can check your connection to the Rhapsody. And you will see that when you check your gear, like things are working as normal, but any kind of outside frequency is being disrupted. So you are losing vision. You're right, something's blocking the signal down here. We're gonna be completely on our own. Well, at least Hank is with us.

And we left the ship on Guarded. So, if anything attacks it, it'll probably blow up. That'd be true one way or the other. Why would that be a good thing? Oh, yeah, that means it's a bad thing. Sorry. You presented that information very positively. I get a little mixed up sometimes.

You just don't get chuckles. I guess not. Yeah, you wouldn't get it. It's a chuckle thing. is Hey guys Are you back? Who's out there?

Who's taking things up out there? That peach was terrible. Oh, so brave. Is that you? You make this dissent. You feel the sensation of the Cums cutting out as you're losing distance.

You're losing. connectivity as you float down down down you eventually touch the ground everyone roll the dexterity check on your final descent oh pretty good nine so just adding our dexterity not a save no the dexterity saving throw oh thank god uh 27 Do we got any guys? 26. Excuse me. I got a six.

Let's take some twists. 22. All right. It was a nine. That's pretty good. Good enough anyway. I'm still getting to know this knife. God, that smells so much.

Yeah, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I got a 14. How could you? 14. As you're approaching the ground as you make your way through this opening you start to see the ground and you get the sensation of gravity shifting back in but you're still probably

about 15 away from them 15 feet away from the bottom of the ground you will have to act anyone who didn't you guys are fine you two will have to wait who what did you roll again nine 26 14 14 22. I also have the monk feature slowfall. Oh yeah. Right in LaBouche. As you're coming down, you see the glowing orb to one side of that dark river that runs upwards, defying gravity. But your sensation of weightlessness as you descend down into the cold depths of this cavern, you can feel it failing. And you know, if you don't act while the gravity removes from yourself, you will very possibly fall into the lake itself. Oh, my God.

I cannot help you. If I can see that, or can I attempt to... Oh, you have a slow fall, right? I can pseudopod, right? Like, I have this long, gooey arm. If I can, I could reach out 15, 20, 25, 30 feet and, like, sticky myself to something and attempt to pull myself in. before it's too late. As you're falling and you feel the weight return,

you start to pick up velocity. You just for a moment catch the sight of a stalagmite. Roll and attack roll. Oh. Oh. Terrible. I'm gonna get a dirty 20. Dirty 20.

You fire out your hand and like one of those sticky fling hands. Thank you. You grab the stalagmite and you let it pull you towards it as you rock it over. actually cracking the stalagmine on the ground. So they're falling? Who's falling? Now just red. Red here, take the balloon!

As my hand will this stretch out oddly, and then my hand will pop off. And so we'll be holding just a red, bright red balloon. And hand it to you. Grab it, hold on. As I guess feather fall on. I can re-up it on all of us, but. No, I'm good. I can fall from like 50 feet on me, okay?

Thematically, yeah, I'll just, I'll, I'll grab it. Oh, my God. I don't know why, though. Something about the gravitons down here, maybe it's different. I don't fucking know. I hope I don't blow us up. We all look over a wreck. I'm over, confroth. You're a lifesaver, Juggles.

Oh, that was a close one. Oh, could you give my hand back? There's like there's still in the blood. And you have the bone. Yeah, there's like a cartoon white bone sticking out of it. The balloon pops here. Your hand like hits the ground. Here.

Oh, thanks. I would immediately raise my hand higher and see if I can look to see around us with the light still emanating from my fingertips. Just, you know, it only provides about 20-foot radius. radius of light around me. You hold my feet. You extend your hand upwards and you cast the light out. And the range of it ends just at a wide opening on the other side of the room that you're in.

You can see it's where this river runs. And as you get to it, its mouth widens. It looks like there's only one way forward. What are we waiting for? Guys, do you have a scary monster down at the heart of this planet. I feel like they're going to be a scary monster. Yes. What else could it possibly be, Chuckles?

Right, it's going to be a scary monster. So far, it's just been penguins and pools of black water. Well, maybe it'll be okay. Maybe Danny's down there. Maybe she needs our help. I don't think so, Chuckles. Let's go. Okay, we go. I'm still right behind Pike.

The same shaking of the cavern with every step Labouche takes, thunders throughout. The sound echoes through the voluminous walls of the cavern as you reach this opening. A gargantuan space unfolds in front of you. Stalactites hang from the ceiling. seemingly daring you to stand beneath them. As you look at them, jet black in coloration. Droplets fall. I'm cute.

The biggest droplet ever seen my life. One heck of a droplet. Droplets. Droplets. Thank you for the support. Black droplets fall. to strike the ground ahead of you. It's like 28 days later, Rex looks up and gets one on his on.

The almost rhythmic rain that falls about you slowly, hits the ground ahead. But what's strange is it doesn't seem to make a sound as it lands. The water falls from the ceiling and you realize as you move closer that it's not striking the ground. It's striking an enormous sea of black water. The surface completely undisturbed as the droplets fall. No movement, no ripple, no sound. from the base of your back to the bottom of your neck, a chill creeps up your spine.

And that's where we're on the session. Nice for on the session. Yeah, well done. Oh, my God. It's a shame that we have to end there forever. Yeah, that's it. Just kidding. Thank you for listening to the Legends of Aventrys podcast.

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