Legends of Avantris - The Mighty Trunks | Ep. 3 | All-Loxodon Underdog Story: Part 3

Episode Date: February 3, 2025

After finding sponsors and a cheer section the Trunks move on to the Quarter Finals!   Gain access to an exclusive campaign, Shroud Over Saltmarsh, over on Patreon: https://legendsofavantris.com/patreon The Crooked Moon, a folk horror supplement for 5e, is available for preorder! Get the Crooked Moon at: https://thecrookedmoon.com/ Watch more D&D adventures in the world of Avantris live on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/legendsofavantris Check out our merch store: https://shop.legendsofavantris.com  Join our community on Discord: https://legendsofavantris.com/discord Watch our many campaigns on YouTube: https://legendsofavantris.com/youtube  All other links: https://linktr.ee/legendsofavantris   Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/wqhjnWyvcAo?si=3TUmxf4nV_7i-DjE

Welcome to Legends of Aventris. Here's what happened last time. You know, so far, we've been doing pretty good with a strategy. We've got as long as nothing changes. I don't see why it would. We shouldn't change a strategy. No, we will continue to crush our enemies under the mighty foot of gigantus elephants. I can't imagine anyone's going to be better than them copolds.

Come on and slam and welcome to the jam. It's time for the final round of the second day of our fleaing-fell championship. Mighty trunks have been awarded a penalty shot and the round will be recepts 7 he failed Welcome back into our third into our third day of flame It's the quarterfinals it's the quarterfinals That's right it's another beautiful day in good football Square. You're watching the 42nd Grand Flingfeld Championship brought to you by Everwood's

Emporium. And coming up are the Loxidon Mighty Trunks versus the half-ling crawling claws. The team that wins will be facing off tomorrow against the Goliath Dyerwolves. Any thoughts before the king whistle sounds, Verit? Yes, Tank. The older you become, the more you love soup. I'm in about the next game. Then you should have been more clear. There's the whistle. The crawling claws are rushing in a surprisingly offensive posture given their usual magical defenses Maybe they think they have something on these Loxidon These are some surprisingly fast halflings

It's almost as if the DM forgot that their movement speed is 25 feet I wasn't going to say anything The ball is simply flying around this field And oh, Babar takes a prime hit from the ringer But is still standing Number 73 isn't so lucky He drops to the field lights out Mm-hmm.

The crawling claws are bringing out the big magic, scorching ray. Oh, and the polymorph. Penalty. Looks like Judge Ido is bringing the hammer down on polymorph and opposing team members this year. Their mascot is alarming. The crawling claws should have known better. And B. Yancey puts the first point of the game up on the big board. Their mascot is alarming in both its physical appearance and behavior.

Here we go again, and here comes J. Gino rolling in like a runaway wagon and bingo-bongo, she rings the crawling claws bell like a, uh, like a bell. The trunks are up to nothing. It's starting to look like they'll be the only other team to maintain a flawless record after the bloodhawks unanswered victory against the dwarven rocks earlier today. Truly, and never mind, ding, ding, ding, I can't believe it, but the claws have rung the trunk's tower bell and put their first point up on the board.

When you flee, you flee, you flee, and how you fleeing. When you flell, you flell. We finally got a game on here. Both teams are simply walloping the ringer at each other. The crawling claws are going all out. We have to get stops on defense and score the ringer on offense, all while avoiding turnover, because bell's security is paramount. Tootles, it shapes off the confusion spell

and sends the ringer screaming into the claw's bell power. Go trunks! Remember, it isn't over until it's over. The crowd is going absolutely ballistic over the frenzy play occurring down there. It looks like nearly half the crowd are sporting trunks swag. Mighty Trunks fever is taking over. Yancey sends it sailing down the field. It looks like it's going to ring. And it does. Mighty Trunks win. Not a flawless victory, but they'll be moving on to the semifinals. My body is ready. And that's our what happened last time. Yes. Yes, it was.

You all wake up and you are in the usual place. You're in the top floor of the inn where you have been staying free, room and board for the period of the last two days. While you've been enjoying this championship, you're entering the third day and waking up a little sore, little worse for the wear, having competed in this very intense and challenging competition. But you wake up and there's already food on the tables, ready to go, drinks. It's a luxury type operation. You start to blink a week and find yourselves in this room. What are you doing?

Hey! I found Louise's face first of the toilet. I think she's dead. What? Oh, no. That's right. She might have food poisoning from eating gazpacho. Oh, yeah.

She ate a lot of them. You get two whole gazpachos. A lot of gazpacho. I say, yes, I light my cigarette and I'm laying in bed just smoking it. Well, speaking to injuries, I think I must have had a lot of. real bad concussion because I blacked out. I don't remember anything about it. It's okay. I think all three of us blacked out. Don't worry, Raphaelie. Hey, but good morning. We actually literally just woke up. It's literally nothing. I, uh, uh, I bavar, be bavar, uh, uh, good morning, friends and friends alike. Fuck it fine, no.

Wait, did we win yesterday? We won, we won, but I won the ultimate prize. My good friend, B. Yancy took me to a strip club for the first time. All pleasures of the flesh, injuring alike. Yes, you remember very specifically being taken very drunk to a very seedy, like down-the-alley strip club known as 20 years and six. shapely rears. And I think that's where we met Heather.

What was her name, Gina again? What are you talking about? I don't know any brought me in. The woman that your husband is in coital relationships with. Oh, I don't know. Let me get his little black book. Which one you're looking for Wednesday or Tuesday? I think her name was February, but thanks anyway.

Anyway, it's always great to bring a man of the cloth to either a A strip club or a brothel. I just don't see how gigantes, elephontas, illustrious could forbid such a wonderful place we saw quite the gigantes last night, if you know what I'm saying. Only the most gigantes world be antsy. I have very large standards. Is this what being a fleen-fell champion is about, women and the drink?

Well, we're not champions yet. We will be. We should count a chicken, that's all I'm saying. We cannot lose. I don't know. I mean, do you look at Gaspacho? He looks terrible. He's got bites out.

I think you need a bit of a refresh, Gisbacho. Hold on. And I'll take out my cook some of him to eat gistacho. And then the other one instantly dies. You may not know this because we've been blacked out from a concussion, but it's got pieces of scone in its bag, making it look very odd. It's a dinosaur. It's Godzilla.

It's Godzilla. After everything I saw last night, I must say that that never gets any reason. All the while you've been talking, he's still hearing in the background. It's like... As Louise just empties, what is clearly an already empty subject, dry evening in the toilet. What happened to Louise? Oh, I don't want to talk about it. I'm a sympathy puker.

Hey, I think you do. You can sidle up next to it. there's enough room. Just get it through your trunk and you'll save. Can we do that through our trunks? I'm assuming so. I don't know how elephant biology was.

None of us are biologists. You hear a small voice from the bathroom. Oh, hey there. Can somebody hold my trunk? No, not a chance. I don't think any response about how do you get so sick? I don't like to me.

You hear her in her very, Very perfect Minnesota accent. You hear, she's just very upset with her stomach. She's very sick. She's in a lot of trouble, both physically and emotionally. You know, I think it might be contagious. It's best if none of us go in that room. Fair enough.

I think you're right. I'm pretty sure I already have it. Yeah, you're looking. Oh, shit. Who is it? You walk up to the door, and you open it with only just the one cigarette in your hand. so far so far and there is standing coach Arthur Eggerman oh hey he's got a tray full of good morning co how's it's it's all right better now that you're here with a tray full of goodies

i brought some piece uh some piece scones okay whatever come on in you're gonna fall behind all right i came in and i wanted to uh hey big see i have a question for it yeah what's up why is it always hey wait stop me stop me if you've heard this before all right I will. Why is it always scones with you? I mean, what about a box of donuts? Scones have the right balance of carbs and sugar energy. Or maybe some apple fritters.

Or maybe some cruelers. Perhaps after the championship, you need scones. You can go burns them down on the field. Maybe, wouldn't it be a lot more apropos if you got us a nice, a dozen bagels, a baker's dozen of bagels with some locks, See how we're Lox? O'Don. Any number of bagels are made by beakers.

I don't know why Biggers but it doesn't heart think. I had a good friend named Lox or Don, and he wasn't actually Loxedad. He was just, his name was Don, and he was Irish, and he loved Lox. Coach, you wouldn't happen to have any ale on that cart of scones. No more L! Oh, you have the hardest stuff then. I look at you. You are mess.

What they were doing last night? I wasn't doing anything. I was just having a good time. B. Yancy here is quite the liver of life. I'm worried about you and your liver. There's nothing to be worried about. We just had a nice quiet, quiet night in, coach. Stop being such a fucking narco all the time.

We can party afterwards. I suppose the sun is coming up. I guess that means it's time for mimosis. Let's have some, yeah, let's have some early morning beverages. It'll be like a glass of whiskey with an egg and some hot sauce. Oh, cheers. Something sunrise. Sunrise.

I just can't remember. Oyster. Something oyster? Prairie oyster. Yeah, yeah. It's a prairie oyster. Also, you're winning from the second round. You defeated the crawling claws.

Yeah, take them. And each of you get an additional 2,000 gold pieces on top of the 1,000 that you got in the first day. Oh, shit. Well, thanks, Coach. We have a game today, don't we? Yes, we are the second game of today. All of the other teams have been eliminated except for the Bloodhawks, the dire wolves, and Damanthucors. So, are the Manicor's plague the Bloodhawks? That's right. I think they may be able to take them, though.

Me too. The opening game of the Bloodhawks is very strong. Once you get past that, their stamina is less. Well, I'm sure. that the bantacores have them fine. Narratively, it just works. Have you spoken with catacors? Yeah, they told me that they

were very confident, which makes me very confident in vows. They seem confident to me as well, very observant. Good. It was as infectious as all Louises, and I'm dragging the large hotel chair in front of the bathroom door. Now we have a big day.

We can't just hang out in the room like we did yesterday. I was a I lost my temper, I admit it, but I need to get you down to the field and do some practice. And then we need to talk about the potential sponsorships that are coming in because of the popularity of this team. Today. Yes. Like right now, we have to go practice. After you finish your scone.

Uh, all right. You better eat your scone. We got a combo load. I eat the scone. Well, no, now that I've talked about it, I'm kind of more in a bagel mood today. I don't think they have any bagels. We'd have to go out of Ian. You got any cream cheese for the scone?

He works. I happen to have some fancy right here. Thanks. Any orange juice? Yes, I've all cut off of orange juice. Ask him if he has any champagne. Is that, wait, hold on, hold on. Is that pulp-free?

It's a natural 20 of pulp-freeness. That's my favorite. That's not champagne. How about some shit of pain to wash all this down? Yes, we do. Wow! Okay! I'll have a mohosa then. Thank you. Choose.

We're living live! Why can't I roll this well when I'm fucking playing? That's all this. Get all those. Vitamin C, the C's for champagne. Look, you know, I know that you guys want to drink and, you know, just screw around and everything. But I'm serious. I want to win this. I'm making a lot of money from this.

And if things keep going this way, I'm going to be able to give up my no good good-for-nothing husband and, you know, live out my life as a bachelorette, maybe even get on one of those shows with this kind of coin, so we need to keep winning. So, totals, you were getting smacked over and over and over in the face with balls yesterday. It's every time you open your mouth, balls flying at it.

We can't keep having that. So I'm going to cast aid and give everybody five maximum point rates. So we're going to do this, all right? That's the spirit. That's what I like to see. That's what I like to hear. What was it plus five? Now, where is Louise so we can get down to the practice arena? She's a. She came down with some of them. Do you smell that?

It doesn't smell very different from the normal room smell. Oh, it must be contagious. Well, I think, Louisa, you had a commission? Should we just go on without you? It's okay if we do, I mean, I won't tell on you. wait, Gaspardia, how do you let it? Oh, no, well, no.

I think she's in a real bad weight coach. Let me go check on her. I'll be back with you in a moment. And so just make sure that you guys do five max HP. That's great. I got it. I got it.

Coach Eggerman comes back after a few minutes. I've seen this happen once or twice before. It may be nerves, but it could be also a serious illness and she may die tonight. So I do not think I do not think that you will be able to play But this is a huge problem I need you guys to go down

I have rewritten my playbook I will give it to you I'm going to go speak with Judgeito And I will see if we can make do With just five players today Okay, we'll go down if you want us to Can we look at some of the Never mind

Hey do you have any Give us the playbook now from yesterday too I wrote it all down here practice these moves and you will be ready for the fight today. Thanks. And don't worry about old, old Luis. If I were to die, I would have died, would have died in a Puk-State Hotel bathroom too. That's very strange.

Go down and practice. No more fucking around like yesterday. Yeah, yeah. We'll do what we can. Should we like stretch? And I'll take the playbook from him and I'll start bricling through it while we walk. It does have a variety of plays. but you can see that he's dogged-eared too in specific in preparation for the fight against

mcoyer um do you guys do anything else in the room all right all right trunks i think it's time they get down there we got to start taking this serious i of course plus they've got more alcohol down there and you know technically we're not allowed to smoke in the room so lead the way you guys make your way down co-checkment also leaves louise with uh uh some of the remaining orange juice and some of the scones. He parts way and makes his way towards wherever it is that he's going to go see Chajito. And then you guys find yourself in the practice arena.

It's essentially a half-court-sized version of the Finchell Field and allows you to sort of practice hitting the ringer, using your paddle, using your blade. For the sake of brevity, I will say that after practicing and going to the playbook and interpreting the margin notes that Coach Eggman has left for you, you realize that you would have had this ability, had you been able to convince him after your skull douged yesterday, you would have known...

Let me... I have a written down here. Why don't I ever read it down here? That's awesome. Okay. When you hit the ball, you can use a bonus action to choose any empty adjacent square next to it and place the ringer there before choosing a direction. Oh, which would have been very helpful with yesterday's map, last game's map. You know, looking at this, it furthers what I'm saying.

saying this morning about us fucking around because he wanted us to come practice and if we had done that, I don't think that we would have they would have scored that one point on us. I think we would have wiped the floor with those crawling claws. I still think that it was rather curmudgeonly and bitchlike

for him to not share the playbook and be very anti-team-oriented. Gigantus, Elefantius, elucentious, may curse his entire family. I mean, to be fair, though, I'm starting to think you're probably not going to be a paladin for long, but also on top of that, all I'm going to say about that is we were you were kind of the shit all of us were kind of shit heads

yesterday to be to be fair we were like drunk and I was trying to have sex with them and you were drunk I got very badly injured no you were literally like you were literally talking to the spa like he was some kind of elder chore I thought you were going to become a wolf I'm still concussed frankly I was unconscious most of the day I know and then Beancey's just beance I know I'm very charming I've carried the team when it comes to talking to the Big C. Speaking of the Big C, why is he being... Provided I continue to bring bones and blood in the skulls of my enemies to Gontas Elephontas Eleuselucerus.

He will never betray you. He just puked on yourself a little bit, then. Oh, goodness. I mean, to be fair, when it comes to coach, he did find his whole team a drug in a tavern. I don't know exactly what he's expecting. You get what you pay for, I always say. That's right. Well, we're making a lot of money.

So I think... You should have seen what I paid for last night. I did. I also documented it. Oh, you cannot share that with anyone. Anyone. Oh, I've already... I mean, I've not shared with anyone.

Not anyone. Fantastic. You find, as you're talking, it's getting easier and easier to do these curveballs with the paddle, where you smack the ringer, and just the right angle and it sort of whizzes around and then takes with the momentum that you apply. You move on to the next play. And this one seems to really incentivize teamwork.

In this, if you hit the ringer to another player and it reaches that other player on your turn, they will have advantage if they use their reaction to hit. Oh. I see. That's really awesome. You have these two powers. Because what I will say is previously when I used my action to hit and I wanted the ball to go somewhere But one of my friends hit it and they knocked in another direction

I was a little bit pissed is all I'm gonna say about it Except for those times it prevented the other team from scoring do we have to hit the ball directly to an ally or if it just passes them off the wall It would have to be going and entering their space, but it would like a ricochet from but it'll give them advantage on both the ability to hit and the ability to to dodge under the way of the thing. I guess what I'm saying is, does it have to be like a deliberate pass or can it just, like, if I hit the ball and it goes past Yancey through the course of the journey?

If through the course of its journey, it accidentally ends up there, it's like calling your shots in billiards, right? I would say that you definitely need to make the announcement that I'm sending it to you get to you and sending it. Even if it's off the wall, as long as I call it. Yeah, even, yeah,

rickets don't matter so much, but if it if you hit it and an enemy intercept it and then it gets to be a lot, something. That benefit would not be. Okay, got it. All right. Well, I think that we're much more prepared. It doesn't take very much longer. It's only been a couple hours of practice when a gentleman runs up. What it appears to be another one of these half belts that help run the usual place be in. They have a letter for you, a small note, heartfelt. Are you the mighty drugs? Say, what's your name, small drink of water?

It's like a little cup of water on your nightstand. Just the case to get parts through the middle of the diet. Regen I? Like little little cups you gave up a juice. You know, I heard words me. Did you bring any refreshments? I can go get some of the floor. Absolutely.

Bring up five ales, please. No, no. Can you have a, you gave it right here? What's good? Oh, lizard folk aid? We have lizard fake progates. Absolutely. Let's get five.

The man will have an ale. It will help loosen him up. We got a game to that. I don't want a loser folk aid. Bring me an ale. We got to be, look. Bring me his ale too. He looks so sad.

He's watching this drink. He wants us doing so badly. We're gonna. Don't you? I mean, no, I'm teaching all of my tricks. I mean, he's not nearly as d'nibble or as grateful as I am. I am, maybe a few more beers it'll help him out. I've never felt

more graceful when I drink. Exactly. That, you know, maybe you can get a few dexterity points if he just keeps drinking. I'm sure that's how it works. You guys have players hosted by the inn. I mean, it's a big deal that you guys are here in the first place. We make lots of money just on your celebrity.

So we're going to bring you five males and we're going to bring you five lizard folk aids. Fantastic. Thank you, good sir. Right, just hand me that package, little... Here's a gold piece for you. Virginia, you said your name was. Oh, that's a fact. Thank you. That's huge.

No. Regina. It was way worse than that. No, it's, uh, uh, it's, uh, it was, uh, holy shit. I have no idea. Oh, I forgot my own name.

I got my own name. I don't know what you're going to be. I know. Golden fame will do that to your son. Golden fame. Thanks. It's okay. Sometimes I,

I forget my own life sometimes. And I just start a, start a new career. Every, every, every five years or so. You, uh, it's a new least. It's not life for you, young man. You just throw it back away and runs off and...

Good luck! The beverages that you've requested and you find yourself alone with an unopened letter. What did it say? I don't know. It's unopened. Careful of paper cuts. Or a hit threat. I was going to say that. Wait, wait, what...

What if it was those filthy, damn dirty elf bloodhs that are... and poison Louise with anthrax. Oh my God. God, Zeal and fuck this illustrious. Do you think she's dying up there? I think she might be. She's probably puked out of her truck at this point. Well, well.

I'm gonna open it. Uh, okay. It explodes. I'm like, okay. Um, you open it and this method from Egiman. He's tied up with Gino at this time, but he needs to. To spend the, uh, Meroom.

Fan art. Derek Soundward wins. Yeah, that's my 70s porno, that's right? He needs you to go and speak with potential sponsors because something that the team is lacking is a cheerleader squad, which would provide you with additional benefits on the field and also pump up the mighty trunks as a name,

giving you additional fans. It's all part of this large machine and marketing effort that he's running. as coach and he's made some suggestions you could go to the known materials company you could go to the potion seller you could go to Friendsworth magical cleaner so I'm not reading this out loud pretty much yeah there's a huge list of perhaps 20 businesses in Golbica that you could go to who would be willing to part with some coin either to hire cheerleaders or have the cheerlifting of their own

what about those Cherries babies I literally did not read this out of You're all watching her awkwardly. By the time she finished with reading, you all have three cigarettes in my mouth. Who's drinking an ale and who's drinking a lizard folkaid? I got lizard folkaid, although it's always the lemon-lime kind. They never have blue flavor. Well, I suppose that'll be two and a half ills for Yancey and I have peace.

No, we got to make sure we get on electrolytes. I mean, you're looking at this, and I'm doing. You know, I'm looking at this, and I'm doing. Just, I'm thinking here that you might be the man for the job now that you don't have a guard anymore. I have a guard. His name is. But go on. How do you feel about looking for cheerleaders?

Oh, my God. B. Yenzy, we know just the place. We can have a whole gaggle of cheerleaders here. Sure, I don't know what a gaggle means, but yeah. Oh, you just right to find out. And I scroll it out in front of you. We got to go look for sponsors because they're going to pay for us to have some cheerleaders. is that I'm thinking that maybe my spot on the team should be as a cheerleader and is not as a player because, and I like pull my two tight Lulu Lemon pants and I bend over there like completely see through the butt crack.

I would be a great cheerleader. Well, I don't disagree. No, I think that maybe, you know, stop me if you've heard of this. Maybe we should shop for a row. No, we should. I'm thinking we should all split up and that we should make a game. of it. Whoever gets the most sponsors gets a beer on the rest of us. Well, I'm it? Yeah. Well, I'm gluten-free, so can I skip it?

You can, I'll pay for your next doctor's appointment to make sure you still got any of those diseases. Okay. All right. Should we stop by the anthrax clinic while around? Oh, dear God. Shucks, I was so now nervous about anthrax. I know it's not the early 2000s. Okay, one, two, three.

up. We all run off. So you guys are decided to split the party. All five of you going to different shops? Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm so glad I'm prepared to run this. All right. So I will, I guess, list a variety of businesses and you can decide where you're all going, or how do you want to do this? Do you want us to roll for it?

Yeah. We roll initiative. How about we do it initial? The short. To see who has the most initiative to go out as a sponsor. Twelve. Ooh, what is fitting. A couple full.

13 for Biancy. Biancy. 19. Oh. 15. 15 for it? Uh-huh. Okay.

One moment. Why do we sound like we're in the desert and a saloon? You don't know my life. This is a nice theme strip club, Bavar. Nice vibe. Yeah, Bavar, what is your brother's full name? My brother's full name? It's it's it's it's rabab r rabbbar of course because we have the same last name

It's rabab r bav r rabbi rabbi rabbi Really you like the initiative and with the help of gazacho You know that there are a number of local businesses in the area How are you approaching finding this sponsor? Are you going to find the list or directory or are you going to just watch out of the street? How do you want to handle it? Oh Well, my mom and pa, we have the famous Philibaphae cheesecake at our restaurant, and we always serve it with strawberries from sherry's berries. So I figured I would probably know where to go to get that. Okay.

And after hearing it on the teleprompter, not teleprompter, on the loudspeaker. The prompter. I'd probably assume that they were sponsor of the ballgame, so. Yes, it's well known that, in addition to the podcast. sponsoring the championship as a whole, which that right goes to everyone's Emporium. You know that the, that there are many sponsors who buy the single bells for the many different games. So buying the first bell slot means you're guaranteed because there's always one point. There's always different bells that people acquire different prices and Cherries

just happen to be one of them. So without issue, you find yourself many blocks, not just five or six blocks, but ten, well, fourteen blocks down the Galtican streets, passing many other shops and finally finding your way to what is clearly marked by the sign out front to be sherry's berries. And there's a large, beautiful white bowl that's stacked to the brim of these, what appear to be a mix of good berries, strawberries, blueberries, blackberries, you name them, but they're all enlarged. They're huge, thick berries that are just pressing against the pain of glass that is at this storefront. Now we're talking. All right. I walk in.

Okay, you walk in. The little bell rings as you push the door open, and you hear a voice. Can I help you? Hello, my name is Ravioli. This is Gaspacho. Say hello, Gospacho. Give me! How can I help you? Well, I heard that you're a ballgame sponsor. We've sponsored a few bells, if that's what you need. Well, I was thinking, who would I talk to about a full team sponsorship?

To maybe, you know, fund some cheerleaders. You're one of the mighty trunks. So you have heard of me. Word is spreading across the city. You've answered good quite well. Well, I didn't want to say anything. But yeah, yeah, I'm one of the players. And would me be your only sponsor?

Yeah. Wait, do I know? be other sponsors. And you all five, when to go find five separate sponsors. Okay, so my point is I didn't blackout and forget about a sponsor. No, no, no, no, no, no. Oh. Yeah.

Make an exception, Shay. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, am I, um, am I, um, 14. 14, need it or beat it. Uh, you seem pretty confident. Uh, yeah, we would love it if we, if we could get you to talk about the, um, you'd to talk about it.

the berries and how enormous they are? Yeah, well, I mean, we'd have to find some cheerleaders to show off just how enormous your berries are, but I don't know if you have anybody in mind. It's a big city, I mean, I'm sure there'd be plenty. Well, I'm sure we could

round someone up, and we could, when do you need the cheerleaders spot? Well, about an hour or two would be great. It's about three and a half hours to the game. Yeah, hour two, yeah, definitely. And you need them in Goodberry Square in order to...

That's... Oh, Goodberry Square, Sherry... Oh, it's perfect. Oh, my God. I can't believe... I came to the best sponsor imaginable. I'm so glad you agree. So, yeah, yeah. If you could get some of girls

that are representative of your big, thick, plump, juicy berries, I think that would be a very... That would be a great branding opportunity. Make sure that she mentioned that someone come dipped, you know, that others are... regular-sized berries. They're not all enormous. They're all delicious, though.

Oh, so there's a whole variety of size. You know what? Maybe you can represent that in the dance routines. Well, we would be representing that through the cheerleaders and through your voice, whenever you're interviewed, whenever you talk to fans. Oh, so, like, just when I talk to people, I talk about how great sherry's berries is. Well, it's a lot of money to hire a cheerleader, so absolutely. That would be part of the agreement.

I guess that's how ballplayers do it. Yeah, yeah. So that sounds fine. All right, all right. Do you have a signed agreement or anything like that? Yeah, hold on. Hey, I publish through my pack and I pull out, like, totally, like, blank, lined paper with, like, marinerous stains all over it. I'll fill out the rest later.

Can you just sign this and that, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, and I'll say, like, one X cheerleader team and one X, um, Ravioli, Ravioli's good word. You start to make out what it is to be a contract, and she signs willingly, having been convinced that you are going to be representing Sherry's Berry as a team and being the only sponsor in this situation. Gina, you find yourself on the streets of Galatica looking out and you have the letter on your person so you know that he has made specific recommendations, but you could go to any shop that you wanted to. In fact, there are some visible that you haven't heard of yet across the street. I'm just going to close my eyes, puff on a couple of my cigarettes, and just pick, point,

and open my, yeah, that'll do. So you pointed at what is a small Galtican map almost to her like, and Roll a D20 for me. I have some little cartoons. 16. 16. You point at a tailor shop, known as Silver Swan Tailor, and it appears to be only three blocks up

from this direction. Oh, good, I don't like sweating. I'm going to walk into the shop. Okay, you slowly make your way on the streets. It's actually a very nice day. Got it. It's hot out of the air. Wind and air.

And eventually you find what is clearly a very, thin but bespoke Taylor shop Oh shit I'm not gonna get these thighs through that door I'm gonna knock on the window Yo Gina from the mighty trons area to see whoever the fuck

owns this voice Through the window Please stop yelling how may I help you Oh no this is just my voice I'm a smoker Please stop speaking in your regular voice Can you whisper then? Yeah sure Thank you

How can I help you Yes see I got this Oh I'm sorry I'm gonna whisper here You see, I've got this paper here from What the fuck's our coach's name? Archibald Craven or something. Anyway, we've got a coach. I'm from the mighty trunks.

You might have heard of us. The mighty trunks. Yeah, we're playing in that fleam-fell championship. Over at Goodberry Square. Oh, yes, the championship. Yes, it brings a lot of business. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so we're looking to get some cheerleaders.

And so we're trying to find some sponsors because we're about to go into the final. championship against probably the bloodhawks because they're a bunch of assholes. Oh, the bloodhawks? I don't play sports. Yeah, I didn't either until a couple of days ago, but I do weigh your pants. And I like snap my leggings. We designed those, yes. Yeah, they were much smaller on the mannequin.

Well, we can make some adjustments if you are... Oh, no, I like the way they look. I'm not sure how I can help you. We need a sponsor. You want to sponsor us? I can wear your pants all the time and every time I bend over. I've got a tattoo on my ass that says, buy these pants. I don't, but I could get one. Can you try that for me now so I can see the product we might be purchasing as sponsors?

Oh, sure. My bend over, the fabric stretch is really tight. And if I had a tattoo on my ass and buy these pants, you would clearly be able to dance. You could have a tattoo on your ass. Oh, I see. Yes. And if you know anything. about fleeing flow. You know those lights

are bright, this ass is large, so any time I bend over, that's product placement. You know, that's very interesting. Make a persuasion, shit. Sure. This isn't very persuasive. That's not so bad. 12.

With a 12. You know, I don't think that our owners would be interested in such a relationship. Well, shit. You do. show off the fabric quite well, but I just

don't think that it is in our best interests. I'm sorry, I'm going to have to pass saying thank you so much. Thank you. I'm sorry, thank you. You know, I thought that what's going to help? I just start crying profusely. Oh, no, please don't. Don't cry.

No, please, madam. You know, I knew that a company like yours wasn't going to want to sponsor a plus size, I mean. Just let me, excuse me, I'll be right back, excuse me, let me, I'm sorry, excuse me, one more one, please, excuse me, and he... I'm gonna look to see one she goes around the corner and light up a cigarette. Fucking schmucks! Make one more probation check for him.

He turns, he sees him approaching the door and he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's. sees you smoking a cigarette. And he turns the sign from open to close and locks the door and without saying anything, just turns around, like, dampen some of the light lanterns and, like, closed a shot. I was so close. And I'm going to turn. I'm going to look. Oh, hey, cutie.

What's up? I'm just going to start following some random guy walking down the street. And you start following some random citizen of the world. Yancey. Hi! It's B. Yancey. What do you got?

I'm going to go look at the entire directory that, that old, Big C gave us. Looks like you could go to one of perhaps 20 places. I know. I wouldn't see. Rock and scrolls. The bounded accuracy. Harkens's dry goods. Rosie's Cauldron. Meru's cream pies.

Friendsworth, magical queen. I'll go to the cream pies. I can't believe you gave her that option. Why wouldn't you have skipped that one? No! Oh no! I think we're going to have to end the stream there. Yeah.

Yep, yep, yep, yep. You find a small cart on the side of the street. They don't seem to have their own establishment, actually. But what you do see is a very fair dragon-born who's standing there, and she is... There's a huge variety of beautifully baked cake. of pies in front of her. Hi!

Hi! How's that how... May I answer to you in one of our... What's your name? My name? Yes. I'm sorry. I think I have to get up.

I'm feeling comfortable. Joe Penn. Hey, Joe! I had a look a name, Joe. He was a hell of a guy until a heart attack took him about 25 years ago. that. Gosh, I also had a friend named Joe. I spent 20 minutes talking about everyone that I know named Joe. Oh, hey, I'm from the mighty trucks. Can I interest you in some of our wares?

What, do you, that's a good question. Have, can pies be considered wares? I think anything can be considered a wares? You can't wear a pie, can you? I guess you could have you had enough imagination. I know where's this just refers to products and services. Anyway, my name is B. Yancey, sir. Hi, my name is Joe. My name is Joe. Hey, no Joe, I already know your name.

Remember all the Joe's I know? You're just, you're another long list of Joe's. There's a long line of people behind you. And speaking of long list, I have a long list of illegitative children so I would be the perfect representative of your brand. Well, perhaps one of these eyes will help. There are just a few gold pieces. if you're interested. Otherwise, I would have to ask you to please my vlog. No, I would ask you to sponsor us with cheerleaders that really enjoy...

You promise. Mr. Yaxi, I'm feeling very uncomfortable right now. No, we don't know. I think you misunderstood me. I'm just saying we really need a whole bunch of cheerleaders that enjoy cream pies. Well, but... Why would we sponsor you? I don't understand. Who are you? I told you. It's very funny because I have many illegitimate children. Just sponsor us already, Will you? I'll make a persuasion check of disadvantage. Oh, could be worse. Persuasion? Uh, 14.

14. Um, I would have to understand where you would be, where you would be promoting our product. It's a big game. It's a big game today. And we can say it's the big, name. We got the biggest creepies. At the championship? Yes, we're the greatest. Uh, someone behind you. Uh, yeah, this guy's, uh, one of the locks on mighty trunks over here. Hey, this fella's got it. Hey, what's your name, fella? I knew a lot of Joe's, I don't care. I'm gonna call you Joe. Amor. Hey, hey, Joe Moore. It's good to be Joe. Joe's her name. Yes, my name is Joe. Oh, hey Joe. His name is Amor. Yeah, more is my name. Anyway, sponsors, please, so I can

go drink with my good friend Barbar Well we only We only deal in pies here, sir We don't have much coin To our name I don't know how we would provide you With any kind of

Cheerleader I'm sure there's some kind of I don't know if you've been down Some of these districts I'm sure you can find some girls That are work for pie I found girls that work for less Oh my God

Please make it I'll make it stop I'm assuming a disadvantage. The first wage is this is a $4.50. We'll see what we can do, I guess. When does something special for it? I had about three hours down to Goodberry Square. We'll see what we can do.

Tell the body, Trug says in regards. I'm going to go final, old bar. Wait, how do you do business anyways? You know what, I one day hope to open my own beer, My own beer, cabrient. It's very successful. I was going to call it B. Yancey Zern. I think it has a nice ring to it. Would you like to try one of the cream pots?

No, I hate cream pots. Barbar. Bavar. What was the name of the strip club we went to? You went to a pointy ears and shapely wear. I just immediately head there. And on the way, I get a drink. Yeah, okay. Make a Constitution.

Maybe throw. 11. I think, oh, maybe plus one. Hold on. I'm sorry, let me check real quick. It's a saving throne? For con. Oh, shit, my cons plus four. J-K. L-O-L. It's a 14. Four of 14, I'll say that you are getting much more used to the intoxicating effects of alcohol, and you are able to not be poisoned by its effects. No, I never, never didn't have it. As you make your way to what is clearly like an alley that's connected to another alley,

and you make your way down the stairs to the basement of this strip club, it almost seems like you're going into a residence more than you are into a formal business, but it's exactly where you remember it to be, and the lights are just as blurry as before. Excuse me, excuse me, who is the owner of this establishment? You make your way through the bouncer, through the actual entrance, asking for the owner, and it doesn't take very long before a dwarf man with a thick cigar popped in. Yeah, what do you want? My name is Babard be Babbar, but of course, I need no introduction.

I remember you from last night. You were one of our ISPA and customers. I do what I can, sir, and I have returned. I am actually one of the greatest Fleenfell players to ever Grace Galtica, and I'm part of the mighty trunks, and we're looking for a sponsor and cheerleaders, And I couldn't think of better cheerleaders anywhere else in Galtica other than here. Well, we can get our girls out. They're not on the floors just yet.

But if you're interested in a show, then we got the best one in town. We're going to need the best show we could possibly put on at all times, on the sidelines, maybe at half time. I've even been working on a song they can maybe sing us and really, really bolster the team and the crowd. Do you want to hear some of it? I would love to hear some of it, yes. Okay, maybe get the girls out here. can start to teach them. Get the ones that are voluptuous.

If you have any men, bring them too. It'll totally be fine. We're not judging in. Yeah, ones that are particularly hard. How long are they going to have to cheer this lead? Well, the way I see it is we've got one more game tonight, which we're absolutely going to win. Then we've got the championship tomorrow, which we're absolutely going to win. Then we get wishes and sponsorships and teams, and we could probably just hire them full time,

and it'll work really, really well. It'll be a lot of gold for that kind of a job. How much? Probably, let's see. Probably looking in the 700 gold region. Done. I give them a thousand gold. All right, we'll be there. Quick, get the women out. I want to take a look at them. I want to make sure they're up to speed. Bring the men out too, like I said. We'll just run them all down. We'll see what we can do.

He clasped three times. And before you know it, a long line of frilly-dressed stripper ladies and men. I'll swing out and find themselves. find themselves in a line ready to hear your song and to entertain. Good, good, good. All right, I'm going to start to teach you the leader. It's a work in progress, but we can fine tune as we go. Let me just tell you, my man Yancey is going to be very happy to see all of you join. So just pay attention.

It goes a little like this. No one swings like bad bar. Knox bag drinks like bad bar. No one motorboat strippers as quick as bad bar. For there's no locks a don half as Tuskees. Perfect a pure paragon You can ask any Gino or Yancey

And they'll tell you whose team they prefer To be on I'm still working right It's getting there But you're gonna have to sing it Really focus on the Babbar part I'm really the main person who carries this team Gigantus Alawfulus Alucius be praised

And uh come along I'll teach you the rest of the words on the way back to the Fleemfell Arena His cigar has fallen out Of his hand he's like You should be the one one doing the cheerleading for fuck's sake. That was amazing. Taking inspiration. Thank you, thank you. And there's more gold where that came from.

Girls, you do whatever the fuck he says. Men, too, don't forget. Men, you do whatever the fuck he says. And as you guys are making your way out of this basement arena, uh, uh, Tootles. How do you find your, uh, middle of the day? Aww. I'm gonna look up and find the closest public bathroom. There are a variety of bathrooms in Galta. I mean like a bathroom in a story. Oh. You roll a D20. You run to the nearest shop, which happens to be.

I rolled a five. Five. Everwood's Emporium of Exotic Effects. You walk into what is clearly a sex shop. You actually roll that? Oh. Oh. Oh.

There's a variety of magical items on the walls, spell scrolls and barrels, double-sided wands, you name it. Yikes! And there's what is clearly like a very proper elder man standing at the counter. Yes, welcome to Everwood. How may I help you? Sir, can I use your bathroom? For paying customers only, I'm afraid.

Oh, do you have a pack of gum? We have some water scent. It's our cheapest item. For just a few copper, you can smell like nothing at all. Hors love it. How much is that one? I'm just going to point to, like, the biggest wand up there. Oh, I see.

The bathroom. Yes, that will be 500 gold pieces for the sentient dildo. Who succeeded in their efforts? I know that we've got a huge variety of... I took a thousand gold out of my money. All right, strippers, that's gonna be seven strippers. One from Maroose, let's call her. You succeeded.

I'm a team of cheerleading. All right. Seven strippers stripping sings, juicy bags. Where do you go? Five big chie pies. Five. Brewster rings. Remind me again where you went.

You went to be cherries berries. Cherry berries. That's right. All right. All right. My all of me, this is a nightmare. Eventually you make your way back and it's a good thing too because only 30 or 40 minutes are left before the big game. And you can hear the ooze and ahs and cheers of the bloodhawks fighting against the mantigore. There's no time to get to the player's box.

You have to make it way to your way to the locker room. room where you have your your outfits your actual uniforms ready to go and you can see that your paddles and your blade are also there for the goalie there standing in the in the room is Arthur Eggerman your coach and he looks raring to go how did we do today did you all make a one of our sponsors reality no oh yeah sponsors I just got cheerleaders I thought that was the goal me too No, and I hold up the bag of sex dolls. This is what you wanted, right?

No, the whole point was it would be a sponsored team of cheerleaders. This is from Everwoods and Paul, you know? Are they sending Jillianers to use these? What is happening? No, I thought we'd just kind of hold them up like finger puppets. You are players in the game. You're not going to be able to entertain the crowd. That's what the Jillinas are for.

Oh, that's my fault. I just want you to know, out of the goodness of my heart, I put up my... Stop talking. to me. Take this deal back. That was very weird. I put up my own money

because I met a lot of very, very hard working single mothers and fathers last night who were just trying to get through medical school. And I felt it was only right for me as a man of gigantes, Elephantos, to give all of my worldly possessions to

them nightly neither here nor there, they're here, and they're not wearing much clothing. I'm just glad you're relatively sober. Hey, Bavar, are they out of retainer? Like, are we able to get a little quick pit stop? We can discuss that later, Jansi. Oh, okay.

I paid a considerable sum of money, and the words, do whatever you want were thrown around a bit. But don't spread that around. Well, I won't spread that around, but I'm sure my crabs will be spreading around this whole town, you don't know. I'm sorry, my Russ monsters. Were you also able to enjoy the playbook this morning in the practice arena?

We did all the course. So you were able to decipher my diagrams and enjoy the benefits. That new curveball mood. That's going to be a real game changer. All right. And who would have thought we could pass the ball to each other? I had no idea. I never thought.

I want us all working together 100%. Of course. Of course. All right, get out there. Let's go take care of business. Are you ready? Hey, what do we spend the Astardood doing? What did you spend the after? I don't know.

Yeah, I can't remember. I think it's an early onset dimension that I have. Or it's, but I'm already blacked out, which means we're going to win. Trumps win! Let's just practice real quick. Let's just practice real quick. Three to one, go trunks, right? Yeah. Three, three, two, one, one.

John was the best. Go trunks, right? Bianci Bianci Zurb beer is crisp and refreshing and also if there's a nice guptych and steakhouse

I still have a lot of work to do to get you guys into top shape but I think already are you guys ready to take down the dire woos? Yes. Sure, let's do it. I can't wait to see a team full of hunky Goliaths. Let's go!

And then he runs out and five minutes later he opens the door and he's like, they're ready, let's go. go and he's uh he smacked you each on the asses oh hey oh my we are getting friendly now i smack his ass with my trunk that's called team spirit and i think with the new sponsors we'll call that the old cream pie oh oh oh he'll read out and then he read into the field um

John. Let's place ourselves. When we'll play some fling. Well, you guys make your way out under the field. Ched is already out there on the field. Ready to mascot for you. You can see him in. Make gesture into the crowd.

You can hear his muffled voice, "'Pill me, everyone. I wish to die. Please end my life and existence.' Who's that guy there? He's our mascot. He was dressed of like despotche. but it's an elf in the costumes.

Oh, and his name's 10. He's highly overqualified, 208. He's highly overqualified to be a mass shot. Um, well, I don't remember that at all.

Probably because of my concussion, but, uh, I mean, looks great. Hey, as we're all taking our positions, uh, I thought I'd surprise the team

with a, uh, Baker's dozen of bagels and locks because we're all, all locks. Yancey, thank you. Do you have anything to wash this down with? Yeah, I got some hard liquor. Perfect. That would be fantastic.

I throw the locks Bigelow and I down the liquor. You hear a... And it's not the king's whistle. It's actually a referee running up to you. And he points at the locks on the ground. He's like, you can't just throw things on the field. This is trash. Pick this up. We're going to have to deal with that. I'm sorry. That's mine. I'll take care of it. and then I chuck it all the way to the sidelines,

like, back into the tunnel we came from. Oh, Roll with the 20. The game has only just begun, right? You guys, we can use it. Wait, who's a goal? I got an eight. You got an eight. It doesn't quite make it to the field,

otherwise you would have wing somebody with a bagel, but it goes pretty far. Do you guys want to do anything before you from the game? I think Ravioli is the goalie. Yeah, sure. Yeah. I did that yesterday, right? No, it was still the least,

but now she had the end rush. shit. As long as as Gaspacho can help me, I think I make a pretty good goal. I can try to do it too, you know. I don't really like the run and it's really hot today.

As long as we put B. Yancy in the center striker position, nothing can go wrong. That's right. You know what? You should be a coach not in this ego mood. How do you spell that stupid name anyway, B'bara?

I can't even begin to think about spelling right now. I say we mute me and make you coach. I've been known to teach quite a few things, especially last night at the old pointy years and perluxious rear... I don't even remember the name of the joint. I think I did see one or two pointy years. I think I almost put an eye out. And then I saw the ears. We high five.

You hear the announcers suddenly fooom out over the crowd. And welcome back to the 42nd Grand Fleam Flail Championship. We're about to watch the second game of the day. It's the Mighty Truck. and you hear this loud roar of applause. You can see that this crowd is almost totally full. There are banners and waves, some say mighty trunks, some look like trunks.

There are people wearing large wooden carved ears that are attached to their head that looks like yours. There are people who are just in love with the fact that the lots of not have done so well and are cheering you on. Roop-Rood, and in the front road, hear it up there's that same fan from the very beginning. Yeah!

I love you guys! I'm gonna run up to him because I'm significantly taller as a locksidon and I'm gonna high-five that man. You high-five him, he means, oh, oh, y'all! With his handouts, like, oh, here you go! And I'm gonna spread his hay with cream cheese with locks on it and a big one. Oh, thanks! Get your fiber in. Oh, thanks, oh, thanks, oh, thank so much. Car reloading.

This is a number one fan right here! Number one! He's reds the box on the front side of the face, braveheart style. And he rips open this shirt. He's like, yeah, fuck yeah, let's do this. He is your number one fan. And you are.

What's his name? Oh, I haven't written now. Do we know? Yes. You can call me Giles with a hard G. Cool, thanks Giles. No way. No way.

And we're about to enjoy the second game of the day. How do you feel about this, Merit? I feel very good. All of these teams are very competitive. All of the schlubs are out. I'm excited to see how the Loxidon perform in the first championship. Let's roll for initiative. I love the call out to our slubs.

Do we get a special boon from our cheerleaders, or do we not know about that yet? Oh, baby! I got the hookers on my side. I got 20. 21. With no plus two initiative, baby. No, I have zero plus initiative. All right, with a 17.

Oh, you fuck. For you, Mike. 21. We should probably position ourselves. Yeah, we only have five tokens, though, right? 18. Who was Mayas to? Was this?

Was she purple? Okay. I was Zingu. Kelty, what do you got? Ten. Gene, do you want to be the goalie? I mean, this box show and I could do it. Did you bring all those beers in the fridge? Yes, if you want.

Can we spare one? Do you mind? Kelsky and grab me a brisky? I'm like pinched in. I can get you one. Oh. I polished it off. Thank you.

If either of mine, make my life do. Whoa. She offered me. Oh, wow. Here we go. Here we go. Gina, what are you got? I got a 17.

One of a cams, I think. And then can you dictate the initiative to me so I can't. track thing? Yes, we're going to go in this order. Yancey. Barbar, 93. Ravioli. I forget what one I was. Gina. Was dog? Is she a true?

Uh, no, you are the Blue. 4. 6. 7. 7. I'm just sitting right next to you. Cool. Keeping me honest. I don't like it. Yeah, wherever you want. I'm going to stand

right next to be Yancey, though. I think that that's like a strategy. Gina, where would you would you like to stand? Where is Gaspacha? He's in the goal. He shares. He goes where. Where would you like to stand? I'm actually going to like stand with a striker position to her rush up.

I'm going to go way outside. I like it. Yeah. Hi, friends. Thanks for putting up with our hilarious sponsorship shenanigans. Thanks, Dad. We're now entering the actual game of Slink. Chutz win!

If a sports game, non-lethal rules apply, if they kill anyone, they're banned from the tournament. If they do certain bad things where they're trying to abuse magic and what have you, they will receive a penalty shot, end by first. and vice versa, and they're playing a group of Goliaths, knowing the Dagger War. Oh, fuck. So, look how it turns out. It should be telling. All right.

Yancey, you're up. First, have a game. Trucks win. I'm just going to go one, two, three, four, five, six. I got the ball. Sorry, I'm the ball. Nancy is up and comer. He is racing out under the field.

Looks like he's going to take a swing at the ringer. What do you think? I think he's got... Natural 20. Damn. All right. I think he's got loaded dice. Trunks win.

Trunks win. Trucks win. I'm gonna hit this thing faster than shit. Uh, eight plus eight plus four. Uh, 12. So that's 20 points of damage. 22. Uh, I'm gonna use, uh, my offhand strike.

You're good. Remember you can move the ball too. Uh, I miss. I am going to, uh, just, I'm gonna put in, uh, two key and, and try to strike this bad boy. That's gonna be a 26 to hit. You're good. Or 25. It's.

DZs, he's 22. It's a D4 because I'm only level three monk. That is going to be three plus four is seven points of damage. So 29. 29. You can do it with a natural blind. Yeah, let's do it. Let's try it. Yeah, no, I don't have it.

All right. All right, so, and remember, you can move the ball. It's my bonus action, so I've already used. Oh, yeah, it's eight. It's a bonus action. Okay, so it's just 29. So 29, 28, 27, 26. It enters 93's range.

Oh, wow. Good luck. prepared for I just I just stumble up to it Oh yeah you you wander up to it by the power of the zers I take a crack at it and 26 is the DC 26 uh he's going to miss so he's going to try to uh it's 26 yeah 26 is the DC currently um he does not uh move out of the way instead he just stands there and lets it hit his chest you can tell that it really stings um him taking this damage but it's not quite as much damage as it might as much damage as it might

might do other people. Instead, this Goliath stands there and ricochets off of him, speeding towards... Sorry, one moment. So 93-53 speeding east. 26, 25, 24 it enters 34's range. Actually, you have to use right there, yeah. 24. 34's range at 24-8-6. But it's going directly to the right? Yeah, it's heading this direction. He's going to let it bounce off the wall before he tried for it. 23.

22. 22, he's going to take a crack out of his reaction. He'll hit. And he, which one was that? He was the reaction? 34. 34, thank you, and the first one? 93.

93, thank you. And he's going to take a crack at it with... He's going to do 13 points of damage. So we're up to 35. Exactly right. And he's going to send it diagonal southwest. Okay. 34, 33, 32, and it's going to hit this corner.

Yep. Which would be a... There would be another scatter-eye of a certain type. That's going to be... It's going to head north. We said 32, 31, 30... 29. It's 77's range.

29. He's going to try to dodge out of the way. He's going to fail, so it hits him, and he's going to take 19 more damage, but subtracted by his Constitution modifier, and... What number is that? Seventy-seven? It hurts a lot, and it continues on its path north. 28, 27, 26, it's 77 again. 77 again.

He's going to try to drive it away. He's still going to fail. How much is it? 26. 16. 16. Yeah. Oh, wow.

He's almost out. That's amazing. And then it's going to continue. It's going to continue west. These goliads are even sloppier that are wonderful spots. It's going to hit him again. He's going to fail. He hasn't used his reaction.

He'll try to hit it. So 24. 24? He misses, so he does get knocked out. So he gets knocked out. I'm a footballer down. That's incredible. And he's a scatter die.

Scatternye. Scatternye is going to take you north. 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 15, 14, 13. It enters your range. 13. I'm going to try to hit it. Yeah. I forget what it's sorry

The clients are even sloppier than our wonderful sponsors at the cream pie Emporium 16 at hits Welcome Gator Girl 11 Welcome You were drinking some lizard folk aid earlier So now it's back up to

28 right because you're 22 No 13, sorry 13 plus 6 is 19 So 19 total movement. You can use your bonus action to move the ball or and choose a direction. You can't use your bonus action on a reaction. Right, right, because your reaction, okay. So she's using reaction.

Just kidding. So just choose the direction. Did you track how much damage 93's out? I didn't. That's going to be scattered. But I can start if you want me too. No, I haven't. It was 19. Yeah, it was 19, which means that it's actually.

That's ridiculous. Maybe something's two. I can. And I'll scatter. I'll see that. I can't believe one of the Goliaths went down. It's the first time one of them's been knocked out since the beginning of the championship. Well, if it hits there, it goes random as well. Yep. Which I don't hate.

Yeah, I'm gonna hit it that way. Uh, 18, 17, 16, scattered I? Mm-hmm. One moment. It's there, so it's gonna go north-west. 15, 14, 13, 13. 13. It hits here for Scatterby.

It's a tower. It's going to go east. It's going to be 12.11. 10, because this guy already uses reaction. All right. That's where it is. Yancey, anything else on your turn? I guess clobbered that shit. No, I'm not good. I'm just going to stand right here. Oh, wait, I can move a little bit, so I'm going to get out of the way of my

good friend, Babar, B. Bbar. So he gets a clean shot. Bar, you got it. I am going to attempt to cast Bless. And I say attempt because I've been doing horrible, horrible non-palent things. I attempt to cast bless. You have it.

It works? Oh, boy, that's not a good sign. I'm going to give Gina, Ravioli, and Tootles the Bless spell. So remember you guys are blessed. It's concentration for one minute. You get a 1D4 to an attack roll or saving them. Thanks a lot. You're godly man.

That's it. That's what they tell me. Uh, 93. It's gonna stay where you're going to... Yeah, that's what you were making them tell you last night. Um, take a crack at it. Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Um... Alright, yeah, he's just gonna take a crack at it. Who's this? 93? Uh, he uses his bonus action to cast a spell and does paddle, The paddle ignites with fire scenes. It glows red hot, and he swings down, and with a natural one. Is this 93?

That was 93, yeah. That's correct. But he does get his shit back, and he's going to stay where he is and sort of look confusedly at the stationary ball in front of him that he just whiffed missing. It'll look up at you guys. Ravioli, you're out. You can ground all of you, boy.

It's not going to make you hit it, you stupid guy. You got this. So I... So I can shoot, right? But it requires a range. You can fire bolt the ball. And remember, you can give the help action, which gives whoever you give it to advantage

and doubles their damage. And you cannot paddle the ball from range. You can paddle enemies from range. But I can shoot a fire bolt at it? But you could also cast a spell on. Yes. Yeah. You do not have your weapon weapon,

but you have your magic casting abilities and the pad. And you can head it from here. Basically, anywhere where you have a line of sight, you can head up. Let me take a look. Let's see if they can get some momentum going here. Yeah, I'll just shoot it. I'll stand in the back and I'll just...

Don't whip around my chef's tool. I'll pull out a fire basket. And then it'll turn to a ball of fire and shoot at them. The fry bits. Searing hot grease. Get me a bit. An unusual play, Ravioli certainly brings a different flavor to this game. Some of the other players who are in this championship.

I see what you did there. 22. 22. Yeah. Okay. It does 1 to 10 damage. It's a 10 right now. Hurricane's a fan of the bits too.

Seven damage. So he's already used to his reaction. No, he got his reaction back because his turn happened. That is correct. He has his reaction back. But where are you sending it first? I can send it in any direction. I would say any direction, but like directly towards you.

Backwards. You could send it this way and pass it. I also let it. I'm not to tell you to turn, but I also like north. Because if you just get lucky off of 52, it can bounce right into the bowl. Yeah, yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, just straight ahead. If you want to just gamble for it.

Yeah. So he does have his reaction. So as soon as this starts... He lets it go 10. 16? Down to 16. Just 7 points there. He's got a bit better.

Um, and it's at 16. Mm-hmm. Now it's 16. Which means that he's going to pour quite a bit of energy into this. We got this. We got this. Trunk sweet. Chuck sweet ladies and gentlemen.

He pours 11 points of damage into it and he's going to hit it directly south. 35 then, right? No, 27. 11 plus whatever was at 16, so 27. I'm really bad at math. Well, someone else tried. Which direction? No, you're right. 8 south.

27 south, 26, 25, 24, 23. It enters my reaction. Yes. Area. Get an actual 20, Bapa! Braden, your guy! Is it plus 6? The paddle?

It's whatever your same was. plus whatever your strength or deck and you're pushing in it now. Okay, plus five. That's gonna be an old missoruni. I'm gonna attempt to make a deck saving throw. No, give it, take a twist! Take a twist!

Oh, I have inspiration. I'm gonna use my inspiration. Twist doesn't let's right, that's right, that's right. Oh. Anyway. Hey! What was, what was it was it was at 20, 27, you need it, 26, 25, 24, 24, 24,

23, right? Because it was 27, 26, 25, 24, yeah, 23 plus I tie. 23. I need it. You ever meet it. So you see this thing coming and you just slam straight down with your two hands holding the paddle in a downward fashion. And you're able to hit that top spin and reverse it and send it on its way. So I'm going to use a spell slot to divine smite to add 2D8 radiant damage. That's how paladin's work. So 2D8 plus, what was it, 1D6. I mean, we'll see what happens. This could be nuts, but we're going to try it. So the max is going to be 16 plus 6 is 20. 16 plus 6 is 22 plus my strength is 3. So that's going to be 25 on top of the 23 that's already here. So we're at 48. And I'm going to send it directly north at 52 and non-letally try to take his fucking head off. Like a cannon going off. This trigger is flying down the field at Mach 11. 43.

43 and a half, so 43 when I guess the 52. Hey, Zeke, I hope you're enjoying Critical Role season one, by the way. And that being said, he, what is it? 43. 43. For him to try to hit. I don't think he can. Natural 20.

He can hit it with a natural 20? Yeah. Natural 20 always hits. You should have gone to bounded accuracy. No, he uses a. reaction already, didn't he? Not 53. 93. No, 93.

He sees this like rocket meteor sail by and I'm just trying to decide if he's going to just fucking dodge out of the way or if he's going to go for it. Why not? I'm going to go for it. 5% chance it's an 11.

So he's going to make a security saving throw at 48. 43. It doesn't matter. He can't critical his success. No, he can't. So how much damage does he take? That would be 33 points of damage.

That's exactly what it was needed in order to knock him out. He'll take his head off. It clobbers him and like a Pez dissenter, his head just goes back. And he falls down limply to the ground. Oh, man, the Lotsodontodons know how to put the pain on. A seven is a goal. It's going to bounce off and write, Scatter-Dye? Scatter-I, that's correct. It's going to be a six, so it's going to go southwest. Oh, so this is, what I say, 43. Mm-hmm.

It was, it was 43 and a half, so 43, 42, 41, 40, 39, 38. 38, it enters your range. There's something I can do. I'm sorry, before. 37, quickly. I failed you. 35. It, we're in the clear at the moment.

But it's going to bounce and go right to our goal. No, it's not. 35 is here It'll I'm not gonna I can at 35 34 33 32 32

31 and a half it enters your range If you already used a reaction I think he has yes Yeah so I'm gonna dodge I got a little I'm not killing old mechanics Yeah

It is moving way too fast Even with bless What do I do it again D4. Oh, me, try. Plus one from the cold protection. There's no way. There's no mathematical way for you to proceed this.

So you'll take 34 points, because it's 34 and a half, so it'll take 24 points of damage. Yeah, 24 points. She's 25. You were just watching it. It just dips back behind that. Like, it hits you in the back of the head. You feel the sudden sharp hanging was ringing in your ears. This is 33.

Now scattered. I. Uh-huh. You can just do 25 because it's just going to do that. Northeast. So this is 33, 32, 31, 30. 30. How are we ruling this?

The corner is no scatter? It's right back. It's like the screensaver. 29, 28, 27, 26 and a half. She's unconscious, so it just goes over her head. It just goes overhead. Oh, shit. 26 and a half, 26.

Yeah, so this might be a scatter. And now it might be a scatter. It's gonna go east. Yeah, that was I was afraid of. 33. 32 on Gisato. Can Gispochia with a natural 20 pass of 32? He can hit that?

He can't hit it. He can't attack. Oh, yeah, that he's just fog. So it just hits it. Now we might be fucked. Wait, 32 is 12. 22 points of damage. 22 points of damage.

Yeah, okay, 22 points of damage. 32. 32 is 22 points of damage. Spascha. So there's no way he can physically make the save. I don't think. Let me check the Homonchio Stap blog, ladies gentlemen. He said he, I welcome it! Finally! So now it scatters, unfortunately, and this is where it starts to get ugly. So he's just removed from the game. Because of the nature of the game, I'm going to roll these in public, because I think that's really fun. All right. Four is not what we wanted. One, two, three, three, that's exactly what we

didn't want. No, it's, I thought it was one, two, three, four. Am I wrong? No, you're not wrong. I assume here's worth was. No. Ding, ding, ding. They're too strong for their own good. Oh, wait. You had a reaction. You could try to hit it. You do it. You got to use it. You have to use your reaction. I 100% will use my reaction. So it's going that direction. So the role needed to happen anyway, but you have, you have a shot. Did you lose any momentum hitting and killing someone? No. No, it's just at 30. So you have to it a 22. Or just a 20.

I'm just saying it's a 22. Oh, it's a 22. No, the AC is 32. You don't minus 10 from the AC, correct? Correct. It was at 48. It was at 48. So it's at 32, so you get a netty 20.

Oh, shit. Yeah, you have the net. I mean, it's worth a shot, right? It's better than a fucking goal. Hold on, hold on. Plus you're blessed. Well, that's, yeah. This ringer is screaming across the field faster than a flameters.

Flames skull out of a bricks tomb. It moved through, oh, twist on another. Twist don't do anything for us here. Snap, just roll 920. It's easy to roll you ever made. Just do it. Just do it. Eighth.

Five. Bing. Bam! And the tower explodes with resonant town. It makes the feel. The crowd goes up. All of the Loxidon fans. Oh, no!

Mighty Trots, why? You hear the many goliots in the crowd. Immediately explode on the, on their feet, screaming and cheering for their fans of the dire wolves. I'm sorry, that looks like it's a point on the side of the dire wolf. Things are looking dire for the... One, you roll a natural 20 for me since you were the last person to hit that. Who was me?

Oh, God damn it. Eight. Eight. This bell brought to you by Friendsworth Magical Cleaners. Drop your pants off here, and you will receive prompt attention. I did not plan that to happen that way. It happens all of us. I apologize.

You know, it was a bad... That's why I've never done that before. It was a twist of fate. I think we shouldn't have tempted fate. I fucking crush that shit. That's an interesting consequence of putting so much heat on that fucking thing. All right, we're going into... Wow, I don't have...

I did literally murder a Goliath, though. Oh, I can't matter. It doesn't matter. Barbar just... Then you're full heel. I hold here. I'm fine, right? I mean, full heel.

I believe the scatter nights. I thought it was just personal healing. That rocks. We don't get our spell slots back, right? No. It is a regular day. It looks like they're resetting the field. What can you tell us a little bit about that player?

Well, he was very intoxicated yesterday. He looks a little bit more sober now. That's a lie! What is it? Salper bar? You should probably punch him out. And look at this, and a variety of strange cheerleaders are running out onto the field. And you all turn and look, and just along the side of the pitch there, you see what appears to be seven women dressed in beautiful, pristine white dresses with different shaped berries.

And hats on top of their head. You also see one woman running out with like a sort of a brown, more like modest burlap-like dress, and she's carrying a pie. and she sort of like doing this, but not really in sync with the others. We call her risky! And then behind her, clearly are like a bunch of tango girls ready to rock and roll with their legs skipping up and down. And men all doing like somersaults and ham stands and aerials. No hands. What I'm looking for?

Car wheels. Car wheels. They're all tumbling and dancing out into the thing. But they're not coordinated at all. They have no synchronicity whatsoever. Instead, this is this chaos scene where they're all bumping into each other and trying to find a formation. Woo, mighty Trumps go!

And they're out of sync yelling. Babar is screaming, sing the song, sing the song. One half starts singing the song. The other half are all looking at them like with very questioning face. Despite this, you all feel. One second. Matt, you missed the sentient dildo. I just want you to know that?

Oh, yeah. You missed the sentient. Dillow. Anyway, Derek. Happy a six-clad. The Dillow and the dolls are nowhere to be seen, having not the ability to animate and cheerlead. But you all feel inspired. You all have for ten minutes and inspiration 1d8 died by your tier leader. 1d8? Yeah.

For every roll we won. And that will be only for the full game. So it's not between... So we only get one. One 1d8 that you can add to any roll if you need to in dire moment. Consider it done. Can you reset my players? Oh, did you even move?

No, no. No, we just murdered two of them. Yeah, just bring them back to life. That'll teach them. Swing out and bring them back up the full oil. They just laid there and did nothing. It's like my X-Y. Come on down to Meroves, everybody.

And on that note, you find yourself rolling for initiative as we entered the second round. I got a nine. I got a nine for you, Yancey. No, 19 for Yancey. I got a 20. Let me do this in order. 19. 19 for you.

Ravioli. 14. Gina. 20. Tuddles. 17. Tuddles your house should be out of that cup of you wheel. Yeah, I love that.

This soundtrack brings me so much joy. Yes. Can you give me the initiative order so I can press me down? Oh, sure. Gina, Yancey, Chudels, 77, Ravioli, 3-4, 6, Baybar, 93. Highest Babar! 52. Bavar.

Gina's coming, stomping out like so many triands. What is she gonna do with her? I'm gonna walk on over here and I'm gonna give my boy Babba help action What does that do gives me advantage only? You have advantage and you do max damage. Oh fuck Oh, we all learn how that went let's redeem yourself the last game honey Yikes also stop drinking and I'm gonna take the glass of whiskey out of his hands You feel a squeeze on your touch and she backs away But you feel ready to hit that as a motherfucker I'm gonna go back to my thought What do you got?

I'm just gonna do what I do best. We just stumble up drunkenly, whip out my trunk and give it a good hammering. It is remarkable how good stumbling. Oh boy, I still, I barely hit it with a tan. Barely hit it, you drunkenly hit it and you hit it with the trunk. It happens to have another paddle on it somehow. I try, I fashioned it to three appendages. Uh, three plus four, seven.

17. 17, I'm an off-hand strike it. Good enough. Oh, that's good enough. And I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna key. Ooh, uh, eight, so... 25, yeah, I'm gonna send it. Which direction, my friend?

I guess I just wanna send it screaming down the middle. That man really knows how to walk drunkenly, and he really knows how to strike the ring. At 22, it reaches 19's reaction. Ninety-three. freeze region. At 20, 23. 22, 93.

22, 22. 22, 80. Thank you. He's going to take a crack at it, and it's going to be a natural 20. Ooh. That's going to be very exciting. He's going to...

I think we might lose! No, we're fine. So put 17 more heat on that. So that's going to be 39. And he's going to send it, from his position, there's really no good place for him to send it. I think he's going to... send it's south. That's great.

What I say 39? 38, 37, 36, and it's the pillar. Scattered I? Yep. Uh, yep. I got it. I'm going to do it. Right here. Here it comes. South. Fuck. Uh, 36. It enters your range. There, Nancy. Well, you know what they say?

You got to roll the, the big wood, sponsored by the big wood of cream pies. They ain't going to do it. Would you like to dodge out of the way? I cannot physically dodge out. Oh, yeah. 30, 32. 32. 32 AC.

Wait, hold on. And if you roll the D8. Wait, if I roll the D8, wait, hold on. 14 plus, hold on. Wait, to Matthew, everybody. He's considering whether or not he wants to dodge out of the speeding. No, no. I maybe will use it on my thing and still hit it.

Which would be plus six, so that would be 20. What's the AC currently? 32. I cannot hit it, so I will... I cannot dodge. I'm gonna take it. It's 22 points of damage. Ah, shit.

Blam, it hits you right smack in the face. It comes swinging back. That goes east. That's gonna be 31. 30... 29. 29. 28.

27. 27. 27. Is that feasible to dodge? I mean, you're feasible? on. If I get an actual 20.

And with your D.8? No, I guess I can try. This is the big one. I feel my drunker's luck. The monkey here was drunk. He stepped on the locks of the trunk. Oh, hold on. Wait, wait.

So what's the D.C.? What did I say? 27. 27. Yeah, because it was 27 and a half. It was 27. 7. So 17 plus, it's 24.

So I need a three. Oh, Yates is unconscious. I got a lot. The last thing you see is it hitting west. So that's 27 then. 26, 25, 24, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 19, 17, 17, 15, 14, 13, 11, 10. Whizzing back and forth as Yancey falls to the ground, in a heap of dust and I assume

that even though it's my turn I can't move back once I hit it you need to basically let it resolve and then I can move I would think yeah oh it is technically it's technically my turn so yeah yeah you're unconscious no no no but like would I have been able to see it coming and just move out of the way because it's my turn it's not a reaction

we haven't played that way at all yeah I once you hit it I assume it just does it shit it's so much you have that's it's magically cool because your turn doesn't start until the ball stops that could be modified flea middle. It's my turn. So that should be like a play test thing

we talk. But for now we should continue with the way that we played. We shouldn't change what we're doing at this point, but we could talk about it for now. I just don't know if it ever came up. It hasn't. We've always played this way. There's like the Kors light pouring out of my... Like it's my turn or I'm on deck? You are on deck in the sense that it is your turn. Okay. Whoa.

So, oops. Well, I can't believe Yancey went down. I believe that's the first time he's gone down in this championship. Yes, I've been hit by the ringer that way before. It's very, very painful. He'll probably be bleeding internally. I know I was. You ain't wrong.

I'm going to run up here and do the bonus action to move it one square. Uh-huh. And then I'm going to hit it in north. North, all right? Schnurth. Snorf. Wow, this curving action, we haven't seen anything like that since the Earth Genoa. Arthur Eggamon pioneered the skill not what four years ago that's right it was four

years ago when he pioneered the skill 20 to hit you're good 22 yeah it's on you turn okay um and then d6 D6 plus decks oh oh you have been doing where this playlist went but I no you have five 15 13. 12. 11. It goes into 77s range. Uh, at 11? Yeah. So, that was.

Dude was just kind of farted on the ball. Yeah, he'll take it. 100%. We are so boned here. He hits it, and he does because he's holding the blade. Holy fuck. That's unfortunate.

Yeah, we're a deep shit here. He does 14, and he sends it. It's going to be 25. Yeah. What happens if he sends it? Can you just trace the patch southeast for me? Oh yeah. I believe... No, no, hold on. I'm stupid. It's gonna hit there, so he comes right back. Yeah. Okay. And if he hits it back south, what happens if he hits it southwest? I can't see because of the cameras in the way. It sails over Yancey's body and it enters Genoa's range.

Oh, he'd like that. Yeah, no, he'll definitely be that. So at 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 20, 20, 20, 20. 1918 and a half? Yeah, I'm doing it. Do it. Um, I am, uh, he has inspiration. No, I don't.

He had inspiration because of his song. We all have. We all get the one inspiration. Because of the chili. But we shouldn't have wasted. Yeah, I don't want to waste that. Is Gispatchew? When I have favored by the gods.

I don't know what happened. Can you summon them more than once again? I'm going to, like 17 more important today. Semen him? You can be summon him more than once a day. That's the question. Because if so, yeah, why not?

What did I have to hit? Uh, it was, uh... 487? Is that what I said? No, no, it couldn't be, because it was 17. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I hit it. I used favorite of the gods, that was mine. What did I do? I'm a, uh, a celestial sorceress. Very cool. Yeah, you know, my mom, she worships Lafanda. Oh, Lafanda. Yeah.

Yeah, he's probably kind of high. So yeah, he favors me, and so I rolled 2D4 and I got two fours on them. There you go. Yes, I hit it. So anyway, so I do 1d6 plus 5. Six. So 11 points of damage. So we're back up to, no, now we're up to 38.

28. God, I don't know why I'm so bad at Matt. 28. So which direction would you like to send it? Probably about some more time. Definitely. Oh, actually, shit. No, that's incredible.

I see this fucking thing. I can't see with the camera. finally. Yeah, I mean I'm gonna set it to 52? So what, will we say 28? 28? Yeah. It was 20, it was 17 plus 11, it was 28.

Yeah, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 201, 20 and a half because he already used his reaction. Yes, 73 does not have his reaction. No, 93's not, oh yeah, he was, he wasn't arranged, sorry. He doesn't have it. Regardless, so 20 and a half. So 20 to 52 or 6. They both have a shot at it. 52, no, 6 is going to take it.

And he is going to twink with his paddle. And he's going to get a... Yeah, he hits. Damn. He's going to use regular paddle damage. And that's going to be a 12 points. He's going to send it... It's 32 and a half.

What happens to be sent to southeast? Southeast? It's just back exactly. Oh, southeast? Yeah. It's here. It's going to hit here. It's going to go back over Yanti.

It's going to pass and it's going to take a shot. It's going to score. No, it misses. No, it's not. So 23 and a half is what I said, 22 and a half. Yep. So it's going to be 22, or 32, 31, 30, 29. Well, we are seeing some really tactical play

here. 25. 24. 22. Right there. 23 and a half. That's 22. You take a swing at a 22 here.

So I can use a stealth to Resque's spot shot, so I'm going to put him here. But that wouldn't have passed him anyway, would it? It's not your turn. It's not your turn. No, no, I'm just asking if you were using the reaction. But between goals, would I have had a chance? This is just... I would say it.

Yeah. Okay. Then it would go past him. But it's going to be like up here at 20... He can't take it. Yeah. So it would be me. Okay, so...

Yeah. So, yeah. What I say? 22. I'll use it. Fuck it. Because I have the blade or whatever. Right.

There's nothing to say you can't just keep it going the way it's going, but some more he on it and see what happens. I missed. He misses. All right, so 22, 21. Mine's... 20. Oh, you...

You... 20? Oh, no, no, I was you. No, no, I can't do you. 19, 18, 17, 17, 16, 15, 15, 14, 14, 14, 14, 13, 12, now 52 has a reaction. So we've discovered an infinite loop here amongst the, we'll talk about it later. Yep, that's a good trick.

But it's now at 12 and 52 still has their reaction. I'm aware of that. He's going to dodge other way. With a 12, he fuck it up, so he gets hit. Holy fuck, push it. Whoa. Which is an appurgeon. Oh my God, please, please, please, please, please go west.

Go west, go up. Seven, three is seven. Go west. How many damage? Two. Two. Two. A two.

A fifty two. Get it at seven, get a seven, get a seven. Seven. Seven. Ah. So it continues in the direction. So that's going to be 11, 10. And then I guess 34 could take a shot at it at 10, either here or here.

No, he'll hold on it. All right, that's it. All right. That's the conclusion of Tootle's turn, I believe. That is. turn yeah uh 77 you're up uh 77 is going to he gets his reaction back i'm gonna make oh i still have a reaction unless he can dash wow it didn't come by you um 37 yeah you guys sounds like incredible he's gonna move forward 30 feet 5 10 15 20 20 25 30 yeah the Goliath is starting to

come out of their hiding hall here uh let's see what they've got in store for the Mighty Trunks, that's the conclusion of his turn, which means he gets a reaction back. Speaking of Heidi of those are great sponsors, cream pot. Ravioli, you're up. Oh, you're up. You spotcher, I'm so glad you back. Give me. I'm going to see the sponsor one down.

To cast an arcane weapon on the blade. Oh, shit. Oh. Um. And then I. I will just use my action to shoot at that guy. The ball. The ball.

Okay. You could do some serious fucking nine. Oh, fuck! With the plus eight, one d eight. Do you want to hit? You'll hit it, you can't miss. No, actually, no, you can't miss. If you roll it, you hit it.

So it's up to you. But is there any point to- You might get lucky and again. I mean, it's pure luck, right? It's just a, is you just saying- All- Use it. Yeah, you hit. Okay, get a 10, get a 10, get a 10, get a 10.

What happens with your magical weapon? What? Why did you cast a magical weapon on it? Just in case I use it to hit. It'll last what? It affects an hour. Yeah, it'll last a whole match. Yeah.

So, two points? So two points. So would 34 like to use a reaction? Because otherwise it's going to go behind them. Which number? 34? Yeah, he'll take it track at it. What's the number?

What's the number? Or we could twist it. 12. We could twist it. Yeah, you can twist it? Yeah, you can twist it. Yeah. I mean, that's still 20.

Yeah. Yeah. We're twisting it. We're twisting it. So it's now 20. I kept the roll that I just rolled. He hits. Okay.

So he will do 15 on top of that. So 36. Which direction? We got to do it. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think at all.

It's just we got unlucky with the with the with the with the uh... it'll send it south west 35 34 33 32 31 301 3029 I don't have my reaction I do I pass three sorry well you guys yeah oh Jesus Lord Almighty just make sure you you shout out because I'm not I'm not watching that so again what is it 36 you said 36 36 35 34 33 32 you can get 30 30 30 30 you can get 30 30 30 30 31 because 31 and a half right now you in a natural 20 yeah you have to you have to add

yeah you can just try it yeah it's okay is it worth the reaction probably I mean unless you wait you know later this game is all about reaction economy in a weird way it's a very strange game that I made so you're looking for 90 20 we're 31 and a half you're 30 29 27 26 25 did he use my reaction he has it And you've got the blade and everything. It's all jazzed up. So just crush this mof up. Very tense.

Only here is the bringer comes screaming past the bell tower of the mighty trunks. Let's see if you can take care of business. Sometimes he can and sometimes he can't. That's the nature of the game. What was it 25? It was 20. Dear God, I'm getting distracted. I thought it was like a 22.

I thought I said 25, but I think it's 22. I believe. believe it's 22. Well, when it was here, it was 36, right? I had 31-3-1-3-8. Oh, it was 31. It was 31 and a half right in front of what's the race. Right, right, so 31, 30, 29, 28, 27.

20, yeah, it was 26, 25 and a half, so it was 25. So 24. And you just, damn it. And I did, what now? Bless is gone. Oh, it's gone. It only lasts another. Can you dodge it away mathematically?

So at 24, can you dodge? I think we got 20, right? What's your debts? No, it's plus three. Then you don't take 14 points of damage. And it's going to stack. It's my con lot or no, it was 14. Just 14. And then we got to hope we don't get a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

You're not 1 of 5. I'll never run to you a northeast. So it's going to be, what I say, 24, 23. That's my reaction? I think I have it, right? And you are helped, so you are at advantage and max damage. Yeah, if I have my reaction, I'm going to take a shot at it. We said it's 23.

Yikes. That's a miss. That's a big old miss. I have my 1D8. Can I even hit 8 would be 16 plus 3 is. No, I can't even hit it. Can I'm hit it. So it's going to keep going.

22, 21, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17, 16. 15. 15. It enters 6's range. At what value? 15. Six does not have his reaction. I see that. Oh, he doesn't have it.

Sorry, he says he's just going to run out, trying to dodge it away, and he fails to do that. So it's going to hit him at 14, so he'll take four points of damage, and we're looking for a one, two, three. All right, from eight. That's going to be northwest. That's going to go southwest, or northwest.

Northwest. Which is going to be, what I say, 13 and a half to 13, 12, 11, 10. Yoits. Well, you can really see the swelps. dripping off the faces of all the players at this point. We're only in the second round. That brings us two. That was the end of Ravioli's turn, I believe.

Yeah, 34. Uh, three four. Yice. And dispatcher will cast a thing on me. Excuse me, 10 beach me. Okay, thank you. Don't forget you still have the five maps. I trust you and I believe in you. 34, right? Yeah.

34 is right here. Uh, he's going to move diagonally two spaces. So exactly, and then that's going to be 10 feet of his movement and so he's got 20 feet left and he's going to move forward 20 feet and he's going to use his bonus action to cast branding smite on his paddle and we're going to move to number six who gets his reaction back and where is number six six is all the way back by the goal the bell he's going to take a step forward and he's also going to cast Brandon's might on his action and that's going to be Babari, you're up. Yoach, this is not good, ladies and gentlemen.

25.30, I'm going to move up to Yancey here and I am going to use lay on hands. I'm going to scoop up Yancey in my arms and I'm going to say, this is almost as if the night that you almost passed out at the strip club, but I wouldn't let you and I'm going to smack him. And as my hand hits his face, I'm going to give him 15 points of healing. You come awake and alert, immediately arriving back in the situation, where the last second you saw the hottest ringer you've ever seen smash into your face. You're now woken up.

Your ears are ringing, and you can hear the sounds of the crowd, the sounds of the announcers in all direction, the smell of the pitch that feels itself against your trunk. And you hear, you look over, and there's this one girl spinning high on one. hand. You've become alert and awake even though you are prone. B'bar, you saved my life.

I do what I can for a fellow wingman. Nothing keeps old Biancy down besides a three-week Coke bitch. Did number six one already? Yep. Oh, okay. 93 is going to take two steps forward to get to yep. And he's going to do exactly what the others

have done, bonus action style, and 52. He is going to stay where he is. Yes. I see what right. We're at the top of the round. Gina, what do you've got in store for us? All right. Well, I'm going to... What happens when it hits here? Depends on the angle. No, no, no. Right. So if it comes in here, it's going to hit right off this way. If it comes directly at it, it's going to bounce right back.

Yep. Depends on the angle. I'm going to firebolt it directly into the... I love that. I absolutely won't know. I missed. Yikes. What did you try to do? I was going to fire bolt it. Yeah, and just hope for a lucky scatter.

Oh, I must have a good scatter. Man, those fire bolts really aren't doing the work a lot to not expect them to. Do you want to move or do you want to stay where you are? Um, I am going to move here. All right. That's it. Uh, Yancey, you're up. Hey, now I'm gonna use half my movement to get up

So can I do One, two, three, four, five, yeah, I can get there Man, wait, hold on One, two, fifty, three, four, fuck You could use your paddle at range to like try to knock someone. You'd use your bonus action to dash Oh shit Is that worth it? Step of the win, keep win.

I don't... Oh. God, learn a monk, Mike. Yikes. It's almost as if somebody plays a monk and the other person just sort of pick this class at random for a one shot.

I'm just going to do it. I'm just going to use all my key and just go run up because my name's not my key. Wow. Wow. Wait, wait, time out. Dumb question.

Where can you move the ball based on your position? Any empty adjacent square to the ball. Do you want me to tell you what I would do? I can't move the ball because I'd use my bonus action. Then never mind. You're good where you are. So that is 10 points of damage. Okay.

I am... And it gets it up to a 20. A 20. And you can hand the cat, right? I do want to know. I will know because he's my bonus action, so I can't unobstrike as a bonus action. No, but you have two hits, right? No, we're not five. Yeah.

I am 20. Should I use my last key point? We're in round. To do what? of potentially seven rounds. Take three out for your bloods. I will have to take inspiration for the

Mikey joke because I found that to be clever and amusing and as Dungeon Master I don't have to reward this good role playing. I get to do what I want. I'm just going to sit it straight to the tower and hopefully we get a good how much damage? So yeah, so it's just a 20. 15

Sorry, 19, sorry, it's 19, 18 and it enters 6's range. Okay, can you? get that any lower letting it pass? No. Okay, so for what is it? 16. He'll take it. I thought it was 18. 18. 18. He cracked it like nobody's doing it. Jeez, they're raw. Additionally, he had branding's might on him. Yep. 13 points. He's gonna smoke it south-east.

Uh, 21. You said southeast? Yeah. 30, 29. Unless. 19 would like to take it 93 would like to take it at 29 no he doesn't have the same teamwork 28 27 26 it comes to me I don't even think I can hit it uh unless I have a 5% chance of it no that it hits oh I see and it's gonna come up this way all right sorry you have a 5% chance of hitting it because a natural 20 always works no dice Uh, what we say, 26? Yep. 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 21, 20 and a half.

That's the EEC? Yeah. So 20 is the A3. Well, do I have, I don't even have my reaction, do I? You, hold on. You do not have your reaction, no. Okay, I will attempt to dodge. So you will take 10 points of damage.

Yeah, that's all right. And we get a scattered eye and we hope that it's not a five. It's a one. It's a one, everybody. Go straight north. We said that was at 20. So it's going to be 19, 18, 17, 16. 16, it's going to hit this and destroy it.

Yep. But it's still scattered. Yep. That's going to head straight east. It's going to match back and forth. 15, 14, 13, 12, 11. And what do you want to take your reaction before? I did.

I missed. A whift. All right. That looks like the conclusion of... Yeah. Wow, mind-blowing. Uh, Tuttle's you're up. Boy.

Uh, I'm gonna... Good idea, Carl, and I'm gonna wave up into the stands where the sentient dildo was sitting with the voodoo dolls. Nobody can hear it, but it's rooting for you. Yeah. So I'm gonna go, one, two, three, four, five, six. And then I'm going to cast sleep like there.

Okay. Classic. The 936 and video. I was really impressed when Tootel shrugged off that confusion spell. And oh, she's using her same old trick again. Let's see if this works. Did I already do this? Did you get to roll the sleep damage?

Oh. Is it D6s? Yeah. Does it just affect the creatures they're in? Yeah. So what is the D6s? a point that I do so five plus seven right for it being at second level yes so seven d8s yeah oh my eight holy shit I got a couple here's a V8 here's a D8 here's a D8

I need my D8 otherwise that would help not bad you should use a twist oh shit it's only damage right is it not considered damage no not technically that I got really 22, 29, 36, 35. 35. 39 plus 8. 37. I don't know. 37. 29 plus 87.

Which are you affecting? 6.52 and 93. So, you get to pick or do I. It goes from the lowest hit points. So any of them have their current hit points. 52. and... 93.

93. All right. 93 is at full HP. 52 and 28 and 6 is at 29. So it goes... So it's 52... Yes. And that's it. Fuck.

That's okay. That's one of them asleep. Oh, man. 52 drops like a sack of potatoes. I sure say that a lot, don't I? And then that's your sleep spell. Do you want to do anything else with your remaining tutelage?

Oh, fuck. Uh... Well, now we've got to fuck. Whose turn is it next? Oh, actually, can I use a bonus action? I want a misty step. No, because you can't cast... Well, shit.

In your world... It's not my world. No, that's... I can't cast two spells. And it's also a Nicki role, not a Derek role, where I do the multiple spells. I thought that was the way it does work. So what is the actual rule?

So the actual rule, you cannot do two spells in a turn. You can do spell and cantra. Gotcha. I do not do that. Gotcha. If you have a bonus action spell and regular spell, I let you cast them. Got it. So, the answer is no.

Okay. And that's how it works for a ban. No, that's how it works by DM, because Nikki's world is an avanters, but she allows it to happen. Well, I consider Faye Wild to be Faye Wild and Avantoms to be. But it also works that way to straw. Yeah. Oh, it also works that way in straw. Yes, that's how I DM.

Yeah. All right. Tootles, that was the conclusion of your arena? Yeah. And that is the conclusion Uh, 77 is off. Fuck! Yep.

Fuck! What are you fucking? We had a clear shot at the goal now that guys asleep. Uh, Where is the ringer? Oh. Sometimes you flee and sometimes you flew. Uh, who is that?

Who is the, uh, who is the, uh, not the bud light. No, not in cast. What is that? What is that? Bud light is me. Is me at the red cap. This is, uh, Tudels.

Yep. 5.10. 15. 20. So now that you. asleep, we would have had a clean shot at the goal, or you would have had to hope that he missed and powered it through, right? So it's like, but I was hoping we got to go before they got to go again,

because now he's going to move into the space where Tootles is. What? What the fuck? He is running at you, and suddenly you turn, you see this massive Goliath. He's about your size, but he is ripped in tone. I need you to choose an athletics or a acrobatics to combat his attempt to knock you down and trample you as he runs to the ball.

And I can use bless for this? Yes. It's an ability check. No, I don't, I don't, I don't, I didn't give you bless. Oh, you don't have, never. That was last round. Well, good, then I have a one. So, a three total.

With a three total, you get knocked prone as he continues south. Sure. You got to move there, and then he's going to move one more, and then he's going to stop, and he's going to take a crack at the ball. No. like all those times. And he's going to hit,

and he's going to do 13 points of damage to, and he's going to hit south. So is that 23? Yep. 22, 21, 20, 19, 18. It hits the pillar. And we're looking for not a three. Not a three.

Not a three. It's a four. Fuck. Ding, ding, ding, ding. Mighty trunks did not see that. It looks like they've I'm going to roll with you 20 and find out what, it looks like the final

bell has rung and that's brought to you by Silver Swan Tailors. When it fits, you feel it. Babbar is clearly not drinking enough. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash

Legends of Avantress and gain access to tons of exclusive perks including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas shroud over salt marsh you can also go to the crooked moon.com to pick up your own copy of our first published supplement the crooked moon a folk horror tome for dungeons and dragons fifth edition and don't forget to snag all the extra goodies like dice miniatures plushies a tarot deck and more thank you ding ding ding uh ro for initiative i shi shi ravioli six Gina six

Who's going first? Maybe I can go first Tuddles 14 All right, Yancey, you're up top of the round Yancey's making some new... We gotta do the I need ever be in there Yancey 93, 6, Tootles 52, 77

Ravioli, Gina, Baybar I'm sorry, 34 Baybar B-bar, babe-bar, babe-bar. Okay. All right, Yancey, what do you got going on? I'm just going to run up and... If that same drunken walk, we're all grown to love. That's barely a hit.

Okay, ten. How much? We'll see. That's going to be a hot nine. 19. And then I'm going to bonus action, hit. That's not going to hit. Uh, nope.

And so, yep. And then I'll just send that down the middle. 18, 17, 16. Actually, I'll kind of bounce up. You may? That's going to hit the, either ricochets are going to hit the pillar. I believe this pillar will break. Unless it'll just break the pillar.

Yeah, I'm not. 18, 17, 16, it cracks the pillar, scattered eye. It's going to go southwest. 15, 14. 13, you can use your reaction. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck it.

Nope. 12, 11, 10, it's going to hit the pillar. But it's not going to... It'll just move five feet, I guess. Stop if you want it to just be like... Yes, sir. That's right there. Okay.

All right. 93's going to walk up. He's going to walk... He's going to walk... He's moved 10 feet, right? 10 feet. And he is going to... No, you know what? He's going to move the full 30 feet.

He's going to walk right up and aggressively stare at Yancey. I got neither of you scare me. You guys have been hearing. That's hilarious. You're both likely. You guys have been hearing them yell at each other, but they're screaming in giant. And unless anyone speaks giant, they would not, you would not understand their immediate. That brings us to number six. Where's number six right now?

He's back by the goal. Oh, I do speak giant. Oh, do you? Yeah. They're communicating team tactics and saying, like, good job, everyone. And they're like really actually a surprisingly, like, very kind and fair play-oriented. I was really hoping they were falling to in fighting, and that's what you're going to allude to. We're winning.

Number six is going to charge himself up and toodles. You've got to, you're hearing, you're hearing the masterful tactical language. No, he doesn't move. Six is not move. He's charging himself up. I'm sorry. He said that he is casting charging a brand of his own affection.

His paddle blows red in a furry way and then Tuttle. That makes sense? Oh, it's my. I'm going to move I like Tootle's creativity with his spell.

15. I'm going to cast Junk. Oh, what? Wait, did we decide that that was like I think jump is a self-spell, but I might not do it is. Yeah, double check. But I also thought we'd decide that jump was not good at all.

No, I think it is. You touch a creature. Let's see it. Let's, let's draw. Yeah, so I'm going to cast a jump, and then, so I move 15. Yeah. 20, 25. Who are you casting, jump one?

You. Me. Didn't we decide that jumping was, like, awful, though, because this is based on your strength. Yeah, you're really strong? I'm not. I have plus three to strength. what do we decide that we literally looked up the rules of jumping last time

it wasn't worth it for me but that doesn't mean what's your plus to strength like plus zero oh I think you like plus two or something enter at summation point trunks oh no mine's a negative one for your chance to win I don't remember the jumping

someone else look up the rules for for jumping I don't remember click on your speed and it tells you how to apply it you can long jump or you can high jump so if you long jump and you move 10 feet before the jump it triples your jumps school or jump speed yeah but your but your jump score is only like

10 times your strength modifier which is like my movement speed anyway or something or it's like don't use it i don't know i i just remember like we looked up jump and we're all like that was trash like the way you calculate plus three what the total score uh i have to take a look plus three would you do 16 or 17 probably a 16 but I'll take a look. So 1, 2, 3. It's a 16. 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9.

So you can move 4. You could jump 45 feet. If you were at least 10 feet before. Okay, all right. But the jump spelled triples. Yeah, that's what I mean. That's triple. So basically, you could run 10 feet.

Okay. Yes. And then jump 45 feet. Okay. All right. All right. So you go 55 feet. I love jump.

That's reasonable. literally be an elephant jumping through the air. It'll be the air-abana Hulk movie. Yeah. That was reasonable. That is much more reasonable than I thought. And when I touch you, I'll say, Did you know that Loxedana are the only mammals in a ventress with knees who can't jump?

And then I'll run away. That was lightning. The Goliaths are smelling blood in the water, me thing. 52 is where? By the goal. By the goal. Yeah. Parallel of six.

All right. He'll use fifth brand. Right. And that will bring us to... 77. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, a humanoid starts running across the field. You all turn. It's not one of the cheerleaders. Oh, not. It's a nude, a ladron, running through the field. I didn't buy that one.

Well, you should have. She's screaming and running with her hands and trying to get the attention of the huge crowd that's surrounding the stadium. Gispham, close your eyes. You hear this loud whistle blow and all of a sudden, oh no, it looks like we have a streaker on the field. Two referees are trying to run her down.

Are we going to be able to, oh yes, absolutely, they've already got her in shackles and are escorting her off of the field. Unfortunately, that means that this round is a dud. We're going to have to reset and start over from scratch. Derek. Babbar wishes to commit

soon. Can Babar just off himself? That lady looked cold. Hey, lady, we're staying in the usual

place. You can start behind the blue line. Yeah, they're the regular place. The regular place. We're staying. Fuck you, dear.

It's the usual place, BNC. Is it the usual place? The regular place. Show up to one of them. It'll be, It's the usual place. All right.

Let's re-roll. Unless that was the name of the bar. Well, I haven't been regular, a bid of use. If you guys are willing to, I will just keep the same initiative. I got a one. Oh, I don't know what I have. Everyone will roll. Oh, never mind.

I got three. It's okay. 18, 18. I roll all that down for nothing. All right, yeah, see, what do you got? I got a nine. All right. What do you got, Babar?

Three. All right, what do you got, Ravioli? 18. All right, what do you got? 19. All right, what do you got? 16. Like a well-oiled machine.

And then I need the order. 16, like a well-willed machine. All right. Gina's making moves once again. She's coming out like an insane circus. I need the order. Oh. Gina.

Ravioli. 93. Tuteleus 6 The Streaker Oh no wait 77 Yancey

The Streaker The Bha-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-T-Rieker And then 34 We're missing one There's 50, two Between 6 and Streaker, just replace Freaker with 50s

I didn't write Streaker down No, I know, I have 52 is between six and seven to that. Okay. So let me do this again. So 52, 77. Yancey, Babbar, 3,4. Okay.

Perfect. Gina, swinging. Just randomly. I don't know why I rolled that because I'm actually not going to do that. I am going to run forward. Yeah, I'm going to run forward. Actually, you know, the bonus action, I'm actually going to cast expeditious retreat on myself in the next.

next 10 minutes, my moves be his double. Or I can take the dash action as a bonus action. So I'm gonna do that. Gina just stumps out into the field. I think she's got something off her trunk. Let's find out. Ravioli appears to be moved. I am going to Firebolto. I can't cast any other spells. 25 to hit. Got hits. Roll for damage. Hit that.

Andy, get breath. Sorry. Uh, four. 14. Which direction? Um, I'm gonna sign that bitch. Diagon.

Northeast. 13. 12. 11. It's going to hit the pillar, scatter. Uh-huh. It's going to go north-west.

So here it would be 10. And a half or 10, so 34 could take a reaction. Uh, 34 will pick that reaction. And it's going to natural. Miss. So it'll rest here and hit 52. Well, no, it'll be in, it'll enter 50s.

But it does have to rest there, right? Yeah. He sees that and he's not going to use this reaction. That brings us to 93. It should be Rich's turn. Gina Ravioli, that's correct. My apologies. Go ahead.

Oh, geez. I'm awfully far away. but so if I hit here we'll come right back out no that corner I think well no I guess that would be a scatter no how would we do the normally that would be we haven't had an inner point like that no it comes off the it comes off that way and it's gonna hit the pillar it's gonna hit the pillar but then you could potentially get lucky with a with a what sis so yeah let's do it let's do it I'm someone to send him up one to 50 she's gonna get a reaction either way yeah me um I am going to make it a natural 20 and then we'll just watch a

call it up. And we'll... Fuck ourselves. Just make it a natural play. Let's do that. Just do it. You just roll it in a certain way with the right finesse and twist. So I'm gonna have the spotch.

We'll use the dash actor, just get up in there. And then I'm gonna fire bolt there. Send to hit. Ooh, 20. That'll do. Ooh. Eight. Ooh, nice.

Send it right in. Oh, oh, that works too. Yeah. So the only problem is 52 gets a reaction first. If they want to use that. He will take it. He does either way. Either way, correct.

So it's going to be 17 and a half for 52. 17. And he missed 17. So he misses. So it will hit this pillar, knock it to one. We're looking for a seven. It's a six, so it's going to go southway. So it's going to hit 52.

And then scatter. But he's, yeah, he definitely. He doesn't have a reaction. So he has to try to dodge or take, or take, or take seven. 17 points of, or seven points of damage. He doesn't have his reaction, so he's going to try to dodge over the way he succeeded in dodging over one.

So that's seven, so then it's gonna be 16 and a half, 93 and 6 to both take a swing. At 16 and a half, so 16. 93 and 6? Yes. Mm-hmm. I don't have branding flight in front of me. Did that last longer than 50 seconds? I don't think that did.

It would less a minute, I believe. Yeah. So six no longer has a friend. fight which means that no longer matters. Then 93 is going to take his reaction and he's going to try for a 15 to hit. Miss. Misses. Okay. So then it's going to be 16 and 77 can get 15 and a half. Oh, 77 is definitely going to take a crack at it. That's going to be a 14.

It's a miss. Man. And six didn't take the reaction, right? Six just took their reaction. Okay. Oh no, no, six did not. Six and not. Six and not. My apology. So six, it was 15 and a half. So it's going to be 15, 14, and then it's going to hit the pillar at 13 and a half.

That's great north. 13, 12, 11, 10. All right. That's the conclusion of 93's turn. That's the conclusion of Rich's turn. Rav Yoli, that's right. So 93 is up next. And let's do you have anything else you want to do, Rab.

Nope, I'm good. All right. 93 gets his reaction back. 93 is going. He's going to run towards it. Can he reach it? Yeah, 25. 100%.

He's going to get crack at it. It's going to definitely hit, and he is going to... He's going to hit it south for 12. 22. 22. Yep. 21. 20, 19.

18 and a half destroys the pillar. It's going to go south. Northwest. 18. 18. 17. 17. He used his reaction, didn't he?

Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did. 17 and a half. Both of use a reaction. No, he had six opted not to. 16 and a half. You're right. Six is going to try for it because, holy shit.

16. He just realized he was going to end up in the six situation. How much? 16. It hits. Any direction he likes. He swings in and hits it. He's going.

going to go for... Hey Joe TV. 16 points of damage. So 32 and a half and you're going south? So 32, 31, 30. I can't. That's a spot there. 29, 28, 27, 26, 25 and a half for my friend Yancey and I.

We both have reactions. Try first. Yeah, yeah, sure. It won't make too much of a difference because I'm going to take a shot right if you... Actually, you can jump down a smite into it. Only if I hit. Well, I mean, it's going to be the same regardless, right? So if we, if it wasn't want to hit, which would be, has it, it's, yeah, I actually think that's your, I agree.

Yeah, I agree. It's then it's screaming back towards them. 15 plus 3 to hit, plus 5, 20. So 20 out of what did I say, 20? 25. Yeah, 25 and a half, so no I miss. Wait, you out of your proficiency, too? Yeah, I get plus 5, so it's a 20.

I roll at 15. Yeah, 20. What was the East? 25 and a half, so 20. VAT 20? 25 and a half, so 25. Sorry. Who would the roll, 20.

Oh, you got, uh, um, 19. I don't hit it. So now you can choose to let it hit you or dodge out of the way. I will, uh, I'll take it. Oh, wait, uh, it would be 15. It would be 15.

That's just enough to fucking put me out. You should be full health? No. Uh, between rounds. Oh, yeah, I'll take it. I'll take it. I'll take it. Uh, so you'll take 15. So then scatter die.

Scatter die for... Oh, apologies. East. I'm sorry. It goes into you. Yeah, so I'm going to have to try to dodge out of the way at, what would we say, 25, 24 and a half? No, it would, no dice. I'm taking 14 points of damage.

And then it's going to be coming back. Scatter, yeah. Northwest. So that's going to be 13. Into the pillar? 12. 12. 12 and a half.

South. 12. 12. 12. 11. 10. 10. Uh,

wet. And it's got, right? No, no, no. Because I was doing 10 from the damage, so I'm going all

way to zero here. Ten. So that's going to be 10 back into the pillar. 9. And a half. Uh, west again.

8. 5. 8. 7, 6. Five. Four and a half. West again? Three and a half. Three, two, one, zero. Yeah, that's fucking mechanic.

All right. That's the conclusion of 93's turn. Yep. Toodles, you're up. Okay, I'm gonna come over and try to hit it. Do I want to move it? You can't as a bonus action, but only if you hit, right? Or does a bonus action move it regardless of whether or not you hit it? The bonus action is that you hit.

Yeah, so you got a roll a hit first. Yeah, you're hitting it, and then you're sort of scooping and curving the balls. 22. 4. 8 damage. So you can send it this direction, which isn't great. You can set it out here. It'll bounce off the wall, or if you rotate it one...

Can I use my inspiration to add damage? No. No, that only lets you rerroll a D20. Okay. The 1d8 damage, yeah. So that's gonna hit the wall, that'll bounce off the wall there. If you remove it one, it's gonna hit the... The pillar.

34 does not have his reaction, and neither does 52 or... I'm gonna hit it that way then, just send it from ours. He said eight total points of damage? 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12... 11 and a half, it'll hit 34. And we can choose to dodge out of the way. What is it going... Is it gonna go into the bell at the...

No. No. So he'll die. What's the score? 12. He succeeds. So then it'll be that. So it's 12 and a half.

It'll be 12. 11. Then that's 10. All right. Six is up. I'm going to finish my move now. 93 does not have, or has his reaction, so he could technically have hit it when it. You'll leave it.

Six is up. Six is about a dollar. I have a bell. What can do? He reaches out with his hands, and he starts to move them in a way that clearly indicates that he's casting a spell. He seems to be targeting the ringer itself,

and all of a sudden it ignites with this strange ethereal glow, almost like a bubble, very rainbow and prismatic in this way. He cast that on the ringer, and then that was the conclusion. of his turn. That brings us to 52. Where's 52? By the belt. He'll move to the ball. Right back here. Yep. And he's going to take a smack at it. That hits...

He's going to do 15 points of damage and he's going to send it southwest. Sure. So 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18. Yeah, I'm gonna use my reaction on this bad way Do we get a short rest between the games? Not a short rest, it's a minute only So it's not a full short rest But if you are injured, they do come and heal you 18

Make a wisdom savings throw Oh no 18 You succeed, so you are able to hit it Based on your previous role So go ahead and deal damage It has sanctuary I failed. I didn't

hit it. You hit it the first role was the hit. No, it was a miss. Oh, it was missed. My apologies. I thought that you hit it. No, not I missed. Just attempting would still trigger the sanctuary, lives and saving throw. But you succeeded that, so that doesn't matter. You miss and it can be still. 17, it goes to Yancey

and I who both used our reactions. Come back at Yancey. So it's hitting, it's going to hit Yancey. I'm going to dodge out of the way. Wait, uh, well, it's 17? Yeah, why not? Ooh, dexterity. Yeah, miss.

Plus one from the cloak of protection, no days. I don't have any, yeah, no, I'm one off. You'll take, I guess, six points of damage because of the half there. So 16 and a half, and then scatter-eye. Man, eight, that's going to be north-west. Yep, so 16, 15, 15 and a half. Smack that bad boy. Yeah, I'm going to try to hit it with my reaction.

That does not hit. Okay. 15. 14. We said it's just coming right back out, right? That's right. 13. 12.

11 and a half to dodge. That gets beat me. 7 plus 4 is 11. 11. 11. You meet it. I meet it. I dodge.

11. 10. It had been one point of damage? Yes. It would have been one point. As soon as it comes to arrest you here, and Judge Edo seems to be gesturing down to some of the referees.

And sure enough, the referee stands up and announces to the crowd, the very silent crowd now listening for what ruling could Judge Edo be possibly pumping down here. It seems that sanctuary falls under the same restrictions as in Timothy sympathy, and so therefore is disallowed,

we will be granting the might-examination. shrunk a penalty shot by manipulating the ball and making it unfavorable for play. It's not in the spirit of Flemfell, everybody, not in the spirit of the game. Yes! The main trunks all throw up like pool noodles. And you find yourselves in a situation where we can reset the round and enter the next one after an attempt on a penalty shot, whoever wants to take that. Well, it went right path to me. So it depends on what their lineup's going to look like.

for who takes the penalty shot. I think it's either got, well, depending, your paddle, but can you use the, can you use the sword? You can not use the blade. Right, so you don't get your pet, you don't get your, yeah, and I wouldn't have my argument. So it's either got to be me or Yance here,

depending on what their lineup looks like, like a divine smite. I have inspiration, we have divine smite and twist, which I feel like is our best. It all depends on their line. It all depends on their lineup. Yeah. What we said last time,

it's supposed to be just a stretch shot. Oh, that's right. Just one person. And they can't take it. They can't take it after they admit it. They have to stop you with, it's a contest. It's got to be, it's got to be. What is your attack value versus what is their ability to defend?

Done. So all I got to just hit. All they do is not roll less than a, what is my to hit plus five? All I have to do is roll six or higher. Can we do anything to them beforehand? Like we have spells? You can try. Can I give them guidance?

I'm going to. It works on ability. checks there, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. Can I give him Bing? Bing? You may give him Bing. No, I'll say, hey,

hey, you got it, and that's moral support. Oh, how long did the 1D8 inspiration last for more? For the rest of the game. I still have that. I haven't used it. The only chance I had was when I said, oh, I could use my D8, oh, it wouldn't matter, and I didn't use them. You should do it then. All right, so all I have to do is not.

And what's debating us, right? if you want. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. Because, I mean, it should just fucking go in. 16. You hit it? You hit it. Oh. Oh. So now I'm going to divine smite. Use my last spell slot. I'll do 8.8. 16 plus 6 is 22 plus... No, you max damage it, right? That's what I'm saying? 8, 8 is 16 plus 6 is 22 plus, uh, what is it? My strength. Yep. So it would be 25 points of damage. That's not an addition to my normal. Oh, yeah, it is. 25 points of damage So 35 is VAC on this ball 35 is the AC on this ball

It is like When the meteor destroyed the dinosaurs As you fly forward I'm gonna roll this here because obviously Only with a natural 20 would that be possible It's gonna be it Let's see it

Very close That was very fucking close I rolled an 8 Look at your D20s at home everybody 8 is right next to 20 And it goes sailing through BABAM! It immediately slams into the bell tower. Sure enough, it looks like the locks it on to put a G-a-R-a-Wra.

Ro a D-20 for me, Mr. whatever your name is, Babar. Babar for the win? I got a 15. He got a 15. He has to teach me that one. One of the lyrics is too hard. I'll teach you later be on. How is trying dumping it down?

The third bell of the game brought to you by the Funion Cellar. You cannot hand it. our strongest potions you'd better go to a seller that sells weaker potions you do not know what you ask and also Sherry's berries they've the biggest most plumpus berries and I look at the cheerleaders the cheerleaders and follow up with the delectable cream pie if I'm just to succeed in the battle do I get the sense that they're remotely put off that we have multiple sponsors yeah you got a sense that there's a lot of confusion on the field there they're there doing the best to represent their business, but like when they came on, it was immediately

apparent to you that there was a lot of confusion. Was it like the mud dogs cheerleaders from Waterboy? I wish I, oh yeah, 100%. Um, wow, well-played note remembering the name of the fucking team from Waterboy. Take inspiration. Oh, thank you. Yeah, 100%. Roll for initiative.

Here we go. That's my voice, not yours. Oh, that's right, O'Rocco. It doesn't look at me that way anymore. I got a... I got a 15. Nancy, what do you got? Oh, uh, 16.

No, it's a natural inspiration as a rewole. You just rewerely. Bar. I got a 15. Hey. Hey, there you go. What do you got, Revioli? I got a six.

The fucking once. I got a six, Rocco. It's my voice. Gina. We can all talk about it. I got a five. Really? It's funny on a lot of this.

What do you got, doodles? 10. Okay. I wish I can remember more. 93. The doctor girlfriend. 52. Bebar.

I just remember the turtle that said he was nauseous all the draught. That's people. It's like a doodles. The guy with the nipples of truth. Ravavav. Jani in that time in the plane In that time the plane Gotcha

Alright 93's up first Can you reconfigure their jails? Yeah, yeah yeah they were They had two here and they had right right See that all right Put 93 in the middle center there Oh is he like the team captain And he's first

Oh there we're going to run forward And he's going to take a credit of ball So you guys want to be 25 30 he cannot get there at 30 at 30. Would he have been one further up? Then he can get there. You can't start behind the line.

No, 30 is exactly enough. Five, right? He was here. If he's starting here. He would have started there. Yeah, he makes it. Rich is a dirty cheater. What?

Rich is a dirty cheater. He told me to set him up. I don't trust him. He was asking very sketchy yesterday. I don't know. 13 points of heat. 13. 13.

And he's got a southeast. Uh, 22, 21, 20. Oh, I'm gonna try and knock that thing at the plot. Oh, good, dispatcher back then. Do it, potion, instead of that. Oh, are you hit it with a 22? Yeah, you're good. You cannot handle a strongest potion.

I'm having fun with the camera now. This is very valid. Good, everybody. This is good. Yeah, I'm gonna try and do that. So, it's 20. Yeah, how much damage? So I've got to roll.

Oh, I hit that, so I have to roll a D6. Eight. So 28, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20 and a half to hit, well, actually right there, we'll go a 21. Ah, shit, shit, right there is going to be 21.5 for 77 to take a chance at. Oh, he's 100% to take a chance.

So, what was the value? 21 is the value he hits 24 who you don't want to hit he's got the blade which means that he's going to do 14 points of heat so we were 21 and a half plus 14 35 and a half uh south be uh southwest for me 24 and a half is what we said right yep 24 23 22 21 20 19 18 17 16 it's gonna hit this pillar oh no we don't want to see a seven I'm a six I'm a reaction I'm a reaction well six won't help us any that's gonna be eight which is gonna send it north and we said that was 16 16 15 and a half it enters your range there rich um there's not really a good way no I'm just gonna let it go yeah I think

fine I think that's gonna be 15 and then 14 and a half Yancey you can take a shot or we can let it go by to get 14 to Kelts. Is there a better place kind of send it down the middle there now? You can. It'll pass 393 and he has his reaction. So unless you crush it, you might just send it back. It's not the middle, no. I don't think it's worthwhile to use it here, right?

Yeah. And then it'll be 14 for Kelse. I don't know my reaction, right? You can. Oh, I'm sorry. I was looking for a new one. Just a matter whether it's worth it to use it right now. Yeah, probably not. What's it out? 20. 14. Oh, 14.

No. So if it hit... It could be. If it hit here, it's a scatter die right on the corner? Yes. So it could do something interesting. Yeah, I'll try it. 14. Yeah, you have, she hit with a 15 plus. 19. 3, 4, 6. So 20.

You're making sure you're adding your proficiency, right? Proficiency, right? Not to damage, you don't know. Yeah, not to damage. Am I not doing that right? No, that was good. That was right. So 20. Which direction would you like to go? Scatter-Di? Yeah. 19, 18, 17. It's going to continue northwest. 16. 93 can take a shot at 16. With the reaction. The miss is 15. 15. 15. 15. 15. 15. 14 13 12 12 oh scatter night 12 and a half all right what are we looking for we're looking for three we want a three we want to work it's a four it's a four oh so it's gonna hit this guy number six with a reaction at 12 that's all 11 he'll

take it so one point of damage then or he's gonna take a chance okay 93 took his too, right? Yeah. All right. He definitely hits. So it's 11 right now. He's going to add an additional 15. So 27, what direction?

27, uh, that's all. Uh, teammate can try to hit it. No. 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 20, 19 and a half, yes. You should do it. 100%. Yeah. 19.5.

Yeah. 19 and a half that is I 19 for you should I reach I use my inspiration good is it critical here not necessarily I mean so it depends on the 77 and 6 seven I'm gonna I'm gonna use my area I'm which they if they don't you send it right back at him you have a chance to get up another bowl if we are lucky exact same role I fail so that's gonna be you don't have your reaction either so that's gonna be 19 1918 it also enters your year at 18 and a half ravioli to save gisbacho I'm 100% gonna try to eat gisapacho no don't stop it

18 1 so it's gonna hit ravioli 10xed he dodged out of the way okay that's fine that's reasonable chicken parma mazzerilistic splung 18 to dodge 18 to dodge or man be dead yet What is that? That's a 16. 18. So he meets the Dodge. Which means it comes back to him

at 16 and a half. To dodge again. Come on, let's Bacho. 16. He dodges. So it's going to be 15. 50.

Holy. That's so beautiful. Why did I hear this? 12. I don't want to do. He's actually trying to get in the way. Everybody's missing. Yeah. He's good thing.

That subfield bar, that subfield part, ladies and gentlemen. How long did the jump spell last? Only a minute? One minute. Fuck. All right. Just double-check my math here, Nikki. I have reactions on 52, 34, and 77, and that's it.

You do not have a reaction of 77. 77 has used it, and he's at the very end. Thank you. Whose turn was that? But yes, 52 and 34. 92. Yancey isn't gone. No, that was 93's turn.

Holy shit. That was the first turn. Yeah, because there's a lot of reactions. So you get your reaction back? You can use your bonus, man. Yeah, the top of the round is the worst part of it. You are not. I have not used my reaction.

I am just going to sprint up and I'm going to just... Crosher. You get lucky and hit a one-trial 20. Bonus action here and over. Yeah. You had to bonus action to dash. Oh. Yeah, it really, yeah, being a monk, man.

That's okay. Okay. The point. You couldn't key point to the dash? No. Only four plus... You can key point two bonus action. Four plus four is only eight.

Eight, so it's 18. And hope we get lucky. So you can just, I mean, he, neither of them can react. Yeah, I'm just on the way. That's all I can do. Or if it hits him, if it hit no, or if he doesn't dodge, then we get a chance, right? Or we try to win the shame in.

Or you can guarantee hitting this. Wait, is it the pillar? Do you want to hit the pillar? No. Actually, that's just, oh, fuck. Try and hit it. Just try to watch it. Yeah.

Wait a minute. Hold on. Can I? Hold on, hold on. That looks like a scattered. Can I undo that business? Because I have a better idea. You rolled a natural 20.

What are you undoing? Oh, yeah, you're right. You're right. Up to you. Yeah, I mean, send it in. Send it in. Send it in. What do we do, eight points of damage?

Yep. That was seven, six. Yep. I roll a three and a one. 16 and 15. 15 and a half when it gets to him. Okay, so you have to be a 15, or what number? Six.

Either dodgers or takes it. Five points of damage. Five points of damage. And scatter die. Scattered I. We're looking for a two. Four of this one. Yeah.

And we're looking for a two. Tour and eight. Tour and eight. Yes! Is it what? It's a two. It's a four. It's a four.

Oh, I thought it was a small. so excited. Damn it! It'll never go in our line. You can't throw it at the other dice because I'm dumb and I don't know the difference between 18. So time out. 15's here. 52 can take your reaction.

If you do continue to reaction, 52 can take a reaction if they have one. 52 does have a reaction. Yeah. 15 is the issue. I was so excited. 15 points of heat. And he'll send it. How much damage?

15. So, 30. Holy moly. 29, 28, 27, 26, 25, 24, 24, 23, 22, 21, scatter-eye. Oh, no. Don't give us a 7 or a 6. We're going to start doing these like this because that's a 1 for North.

Straight North. It's a 1 for North? Oh, sorry. Okay, then 21, 20. Do either of you have your reactions? No. Um, who's that? That's you.

Oh, that's me. I have my reaction. I'll take, I'll take an attack at 19. This is 52's turn, right? Yep. That's a whole hit. That's gonna be a hit. One D6 plus my strength.

Oh, plus my, no, plus my strength. So eight. So I roll mags damage on that. We're so dumb. So we're at 19. Why are we done? 19 plus age 27. Because he still had a twist of fate.

When he nit, we should have let him do it. But it's still. It might matter. And we should save it for the smites. Yeah. and penalty shots. Yeah. But anyway, 27 now.

Yep. And I can't use my bonus action. I am out of some nights, but let me think here. If I go up this direction and crush this guy, that's not very good. Let me go here. Sorry, let me go here. Scatter-Eye is not great. Let's go up this way.

Scatter-Eye is also not fucking great. Yeah, that sucks. I'm just going to try to crush 34. Yeah. So it's going to be 27, 26, 25, 24. 23, 22, 21 and a half enters 34 range. He does have his reaction. He does.

He does. What's the number? I just said 22.5. Whatever I said? 23 and a half? He misses, so he's going to try to dodge out of the way. Well, I think I've miscounted. Oh, this fails.

So how much? 21 and 1 half. So he'll take 11 points of damage. Which number? 34. It's 21. Okay. And then we'll scatter.

And that's going to scatter in the westerly direction. So that's going to be 19 on 77. He doesn't have it, but he's going to try to dodge it other way. 19, he fails. Scattered I? Yep.

And he takes nine points of damage. It's going to be a 8 for Northwest. And what number is that? 8 should be, yeah, fuck. Northwest. Seventy-seven took nine points of damage. Northwest is going to be nine points of reach. So 18, 17, it's going to hit the pillar and destroy the pillar.

Scatter-die. You got this. We need two. We need three. Or two. It's four. Fuck, it's going to hit six for seven points of damage at 17 and a half. If he can't dodge.

Sorry. Who, how much? Someone took eight points of damage. 77 took eight points of damage. Nine points of damage. Now it's going to be seven and a half, so 17, so seven points of damage we can't get out of the way to 17. Who's making a save? So number six is making against 17.

He succeeds. So 17. Does 52 have a reaction? 52 does have a reaction. So 52 can take a crack at 17. Fuck. He misses. 34 at 16 and a half?

34 does not have a reaction. 16, 15. No one has a reaction. 14. It's going to hit this stupid pillar over here at 14 and scattered. Uh-huh. That's going to look like a south-west. 13, 12, 11, 10.

Okay. The bar. Oh, it's my turn. Welcome to the turn. There you go. What am I out? Give me one minute here. Not for a long time.

Fuck, I'm stupid. Yeah, I'm stupid. Babar is working his way into what is going to be the most strategically advantageous, tactical, most special effective move of the day. You can tell that he's really a clear thinking head. You mean he's a smart player? Fuck, man. Oh, shit, my bad.

I always have. He's at least once a session. I got nothing. I got nothing good here. I think I'm just going to try to move here and crush this guy or something. Yeah, do it. Or I just go for the pillar and hope. we get lucky but that's not good either let's crush this fucker yeah fuck him so I'm

gonna use my well I gotta see if I hit first yeah I don't I don't oh I don't wait do you have inspiration though no I don't you're honest it oh it's me I used to make sure I that pet legal uh what would be a good way I guess nothing better than what he'd be an actual the one from singing Gaston yeah yeah basically just shoot it straight down towards 70 seven. So the best we're gonna do. Oh, well. How would I have to do? Because I'm gonna move it one square. How many squares can those swings around you? You can move it to any empty adjacent square that is adjacent to the ringer itself. Not to yourself. Even if that's beyond your reach. So you can move here and that.

So I move anywhere within this area. Yeah, it moves it moves face on where its location is not yours. As an example, if you were right where you are right now, if you were right now, if you were right here. You could hit it and after you used your bonus action to curve it, you could put it here, here, here, here, here. But not here or here. It has to be an empty adjacent

square to the ringer itself. Correct. So I'm going to I think I'm going to hit it and try to aim it that way to hit that color. Yeah, that's fine. That's a good play. Hold on. Can I use an inspiration for that? Yeah. If you have the inspiration, Yes, you can roll a D8.

She got an inspiration, she has an inspiration and her D8. Your D8? Your D8s are over here when you rolled all your sleep spells. So 8 plus 5. Yeah, you're good. Yeah, you got 13. So where would you like to move it before you hit it? I think I don't want to move it.

I'm just going to, I'm going to send it this way to go that way. Well, okay, so then what I would, hold on. You said you wanted to hit the pillar? Yeah, it's true. It'll hit the pillar once it passes off. Oh, yeah. That's right. So the only thing I would say is just for mechanical learning. is once you roll your damage, move it five feet anyway, use your bonus action, because you get an extra five feet on it.

Yeah. Okay, sure. So what's your damage? Five plus moving at five. So just what's the damage? Five damage? Okay, so it's going to move five feet first, and then we're going to do 14, 13, 12. Does he have his reaction? No. 11, 10. None of my boys have that reaction, right? None of them have their reaction, yeah.

That's the conclusion of Babar Doodle's turn. 34 gets his reaction back and to the top of his turn, where is 34? He can make it. He's going to run over to it. He has terrible options, but he's going to smack it. He hits. Put 16 of heat on that in the southwesternly direction. 25, 24, 23, 22, 21.

And yes, you do have your reaction. I needed a 19. I got a 20. So I am going to hit. That's going to be six points of damage from 19. 5, which is 25 and a half. And, yeah, I'm going to send to that pillar. I think.

Yeah, I think that's what I'm going to do. Yeah. So that's going to be 26 and a half. It goes to 25 and a half, 24, 23, 22, 21. And a half. 20 and a half. That looks like a... Sorry, it's the northeast, and number two.

So it just continues on... So what I say, 20 and a half, so 20, 19, 18, 17 and a half. They don't have a reaction. So it's going to hit six for 17. Is the AC to dodge or take it? And he wants to dodge. Probably. Oh, yeah.

17, he failed. So he'll take seven points of damage and roll scatter night. Or which number? Seven. Six. We'll take seven points of damage. We got this. We got this.

We just need it. We just needed two guys. We should have two. And the scatter died? Yep. Seven. That's going to go west. So that's going to be, sorry, 16, 15, 14, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10.

All right. Uh, that's the conclusion of two's turn, unless you have anything else you want to do? Oh, that's not. No, I'm going. All right. 34 is up. No, that was 34. That was 34. My apologies.

It's number six's turn. And number six is going to be where he is. Yeah. He's on the bell. He's just going to hang out. Raviola, you're up. Talk. So, I mean, you've got a good shot.

Mm-hmm. Wait, it's, it'll just ricochet. And then it'll go... And go that way, right? But... Or you can send it right back at him. Try to knock him out and or hope we get one. Yeah.

That's going to be your best bet. I am going to send one, two, three, four, five, six. First, I... Can I just shoot other players? You don't know. Why would you do that? You know that it has to be non-lethal. sleep works

so if I accidentally kill him I'm fucked yeah if you actually kill them we're big deep shit he already told us if you kill someone you're removed from the game right so we would be down you basically get red carded and then we also don't know what happens if you just attack somebody and they would really get a penalty and then they would probably

but if you make an intelligence check with the DC 15 I'll give you more information yeah I mean uh you don't you know You don't have. So I'm just going to have him dash. One, two, three, four, five.

He's going to sit right there. And then I'm going to stay right there. And I am going to, I guess, just fireball. Yeah. You'll have an option. I don't really have any of choice. Uh, the hits. Great.

A damage. Are you about to send it north? Yeah. Uh, yes. 17, 16, 15. He has his reaction again. 15 on number 6 can gain reaction. So we've got to burn him out.

Number 6 does have the reaction. He'll take it. What's the value? 16. Yeah. He misses. So now it's 15 and a half to dodge or take five points of damage. Natural point A, he dodged.

The dodge, so it's going to be 14. Well, actually, he does not have his reaction? He does not have a match. So it would be 14 and a half to. dodge or take four points of damage from 52? He takes four points. Scattered that. Yep. And wait one moment. Eight or three, eight or three or eight or two, eight or two. How much damage that's fifty two take? Takes four points of damage. Eighths just a flat out full. Six. You're southwest. That's gonna be 14, 13, 12, 11, 10. Okay, that's it for me. All right.

What are you got? I am going to... I'm going to try and send it that way by hitting it with a fire. You're going to bolt some fire? Yeah, I'm going to move first. Then I'm going to bolt some fire. Well, I rolled a 10, so I definitely hit it for this. Two.

Which direction? I was going to send a diagonal. Send it to me! Yeah, I'll send it to Yancey. I'll send it straight. As a pass? Yes. Yeah. Okay.

So it's going to be 11 there. And I'm advantaged. And you're advantaged because I'm passing it. Unless I'm stupid, it's a 10. Where was it? It was right here. Yeah. 11. 10. It's a 10. Yeah. It's a 10.

I hit. You're advantage. You hit. You're advantage. Did you roll twice? I rolled twice. I rolled twice. 16 and 18. Okay. Okay. Wow. Gina really sent it up. Uh, eight points. Yeah.

So another eight points from 10 is 18. Which direction would you like to send it? Dang. Which diagonal? You should be able to get it Oh no, maybe not We have been Yeah

You can get right in Yep If you can get right in 17, 16 15 Does 6 have a reaction? 6 does not have a reaction That's a goal

Ding Bing Bing Big Oh man New from Gendys Tying it up Who's cheating him with the past

The overreying it up The under ovaries The passes have it The passes have it. Down to Deddies, you could give the Joe Creep Buzz. This is a powerful lesson about T-14. 18. That was my turn.

Trugs, trunks! The fourth bell of the game brought to you by Eldridge Foundry, craft the miniature of your dreams. It was in there. No, really, go do it. Let's do it. That one sounds like it's real. It's real.

That's not a joke. It's just a real thing. I was waiting for the pendulum. I was like, I was thinking, hail to the Eldridge Foundry, and now we're going to end the round next to real quick.

Are we hitting the board for the sake of brevity, I'm going to say that the announcers say things that are anouncery, the cheerleaders do things that are cheerleaderie, the mascots do things that are mousottery, and the crowd do things that are crowdery. Roll for initiative.

Let him go through it. I got B. Oh, I got an Antibald. What do you got there, B-B-B-B-B. And 11. 11 for bar. What's your middle initial? B.

Oh, B. Ravioli. 12. 17. One moment. Rav for 12. 17 for Gina. And what do you got, who are?

22. 22 for, wow, 22. Goodness gracious. I roll a natural twin. All right. Tudels. Had it up. Yancey.

On first. 93. 6. 52. Gina. Ravioli. Stupid fucking badball. 77.

77. Baybar. Oh, yeah. Rich, can you? I'm sorry. reset them. Yeah, but they're all up to the front of the blue line. I accept 93-5.

So I'm guessing two are still in there. Maddox run out. Everyone is healed back to Max. Just remember that you're healed back to Max. Got it. It's interesting to see Tootles rush out of the gate. What if she gotten in store? Hello.

I broke out into applause. Leighbors probably hate me. In there, buddy. Okay. I'm going to go. One, two, three, four, five, six. I'm gonna misty step to right here. Um, swing it.

Any preference? Yeah, hit that, hit that guy and get rid of him. Yeah. Or that guy, yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna head it that way to try to hit the... 10 is all you need. Yeah, I got a, um, six. Swing in a mess.

Coming out of the misty step, you are all dissembled. Can I re-roll with my other inspiration? Yep. Yeah. Fucking do it. Wait, so you... You had the cheerleader inspiration. is adding a D8, which would...

I'm saying to your hit. So you rolled a six last time, right? Yeah, your first roll wasn't six. So you should have... No, my first roll was a four. Oh, okay. Okay. And now you roll the what? But you should have at least plus five to hit.

I don't have plus three to hit. What's your strength? What's your strength? Strength. Is it? Do you have anything else? I do not. Okay, you're standing there with your reaction, which is fine.

Stund yeah. Oh, I can still get down here because I'm a bunk. I'm gonna go down this way, I think. And I'm gonna finally just crack it. You have a bonus action, too. That'll hit. Let's do some math here. Great, that's six points or uh, yeah, six points of damage.

All right, six points of momentum gets sped on top of the ringer. um yancey uh one of the the the money makers here is picking his direction as he slams into i keys by both action to hit it if he wants the bonus action move to the ball unless you're trying to strike it again right yeah i'll strike it again yeah natural 20 you got to get a do you want to do you want to use one of our quits on it uh i already rolled almost max so uh oh wait no this is this is so yes i already rolled so seven plus 4 is 11 on top

of that. So what's that total? 16 plus 11, 22. Yeah, 27. You can also send it straight at this guy. 27 total. Yeah, you can try to crush 77. They've all got the reactions, though. I think he'll miss. You could try and send it straight in.

I mean, yeah, you got three. But then they both have shots. But at 27. I'll shoot it at 77. Yeah. So you're going to... You're still going to get three people. If you should...

This way you're going to get three. No, no, no. This way you're going to get three. He isn't his bonus action. Wait. This way here. Oh, unless... And then here.

Yeah. So you'll go right now. That's reasonable. You'll get two reactions. Let's fucking... What was the total? Was it 27? 27.

If one. 26. 25. 24. 23 and a half at 52 has a shot. So 23. 52? Yeah, 52. Do you use their reaction to try to take a crack at it with the bad?

23? misses. 23 and a half. Okay. Okay. 23 it enters 77's range. Any number? Can't lower that any? No. No, it'll hit them.

All right. 23 is going to, wait. What number? 23 to 77. Oh, 77, thank you. 77 will use their reaction. For 23, they will also mess with it. So now it's 22 and a half. He can choose to dodge if you want.

Natural one. So that's going to hit to dodge? To dodge. So it's going to hit him for 12 points of damage and scatter. Hit number 77 for 12. That's going to be a 9, 2.1 hit point, and then. Scatter die for the 2. Scatter die for the 2.

2. 7. Dang it. That's going to head west. So that was 22 and a half. So 22, 21, 2019, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 14, 14, 13, 13, 12. He doesn't have a reaction. So he's got to dodge at 11.5. 11 and a half. Or take one point of damage.

So he'll take one point of damage and scatter down. Scatter again. We need a two. Take no damage and he is going to, what is it? A two you wanted? Yeah. Two. No way. I'm not touching this if you want to look real quick.

Look, Mike. Make sure he's not lying. Right here. Holy shit. Yay! It's a fucking two. It's a fucking two. Finally I had something to bring our way.

Yeah. We finally had something to make a roll. I should have fucking wrong it in front of the screen. Oh shit. And ding, ding, ding, everybody. Boom, goes to spell scroll. I was just, see, I didn't have enough, I didn't have enough, Milwaukee's best at the time.

Now I'm just enough in. You got to give it up. I feel like a beast, the beast is at least. Who sent that screaming? Who is turn into? But my, my. Danster. You always roll the point.

You always roll in a point. 14. 14. 14. This fifth bell brought to you by pointy ears and shapely rears putting the hoe and poke in hocus pocus Pocus. All right, ladies and gentlemen, yeah, same configuration. Where are you...

Yeah, go there's. That's fine. It's down to the final... It's down to the final point. It's down to the final point. Actually, it's down to... Oh, wow. It's down to the...

It's almost tied up. We've got a very tense, close game here, and unfortunately, my pen is broken. I'm having a difficulty. Oh, here it goes. All right. Let's see if we can make sure our reactions are being tracked. And then we're going to, and then we're going to one, two, three, four. Why am I missing?

Ten's not on here anymore. Who am I missing? 52 is always missing. 52. All right. Yes, what do you got? I only have a seven. A seven for Yancey.

Not the big Yance over here. Who do we got, Bar? One. Oh, my God. I just have a baby. I can't believe you're much of Vandras twice this game. I hate playing. Whoa.

Just have, just who is mine? I got an 11. An 11. How do you lose high life. I had to do quick math. Tuddles. 14. Wow.

Part teen. We weren't real high. Yeah. Partteen. Fartteen. Part box. Uh, love that guy. So, all right.

77.34. Then turtles. Then six Gina. Then 9352. Then Ravioli. Then Yancey Mabar. Gotcha. Top of the round, 77.

You know what's going in a row, though, after. Yeah. That actually could be helpful. 77 he's going to fly down yeah he's going to flying is against the rules kind of shot he's gonna go he's gonna take a dash action well the flies are really how far

defaults yeah 60 feet the dire world's clearly are hungry to make some move 34 is going to alternate the dax action he's gonna fly down there why not Oh, Tootel, you're up. Oh, golly. Well, the dire wolves are really hungry for blood. I think they want to get into the way of these players and maybe knock down a few.

Um. Tuttle is fast this time. Yeah. I'm going to... That's my great commentary. Trunks win! I'm going to stand there and cast... Let's see here.

A golfing getting bohemian would be just dying. You look like a Goliath failure. And I'll cast Natasha's hideous laughter on 77. Yeah. Oh, 77. Yeah.

Okay. He needs to make a throw of sometime, right? A wisdom saving throw. Is it wisdom? I believe so, yeah. What's your VC? Is that mine?

Where is that? Yeah, 13. Okay, 13. He gets a 9. Hey. I needed a roll a persuasion check. Oh God. Edo is gonna fuck us.

You gonna cut us. You look up at Edo and he seems to look at you and as this Goliath collapses down in laughter. Just shake. You remember Tim Allen like? He literally pulls the whistle and he looks at you and then he sees what happening and be Oh with a natural 10 you met it or beat it was the closest it could possible in it um

yikes jojks that being said uh what number is uh currently on the ground prone uh 77 is laughing his butt off i'm going to put that right there and that's six is up. He's going to stay where he is. In fact, he's going to take a step to his right. Yep. And then he's going to hang out right there. Gina, what do you got? I am going to. And I'm going to cast Bain on 34 and 77. Oh, jeez. It does not count as an attack against him so he doesn't get to roll his thing against it. He just has to roll against my Christmas save. It's Christmas save. I don't know if somebody under Couches. hideous laughter would be able to do with this save? Would he technically be able to... Yeah, I don't see why he couldn't.

Okay, so what's the easy? 13 charisma save? And he failed with three, and then the other one fell with an eight. Yes, they're both bane. So 77 and 34 bane. And then that's hideous laughter. He he he he he he he he he.

93 and tough. Liff Fanda doesn't like this shit. you guys are putting up with today. He runs up to the ball. He takes a swing and he smashes it for 13 momentum going in the southwesternly directions.

23 and 2, 21, 20, 19 and a half Ravioli does not get the chance to read 18 to half for Ravi. Okay. Oh shit. Don't fuck this up.

Oh my God. There's that much more I could do, right? No. That's literally it. 20 something. Oh! So you hit? You got the paddle, right?

You got the... How does the paddle work? It's a D10. A D-10. Okay. Twist it. Yeah, twist it. Twist it.

How many we have? We've got... It's only more than one is all I'm saying. Yes. Oh, yes. So that's 10, 11, 12, 13 damage. All right, so that was at a 19. 19 and a half.

And a half. So we're looking at... 32 and a half. I mean, sending right back. Yeah. The direction that it came. Yeah. So that's going to be 32, 31, 30, 30, 19, 18.

He has his reaction. Unfortunately. Which one is that? 93 has his reaction. What number? What's the TV? It would be... What did I just say?

Did I say 18? 18. I trust it. Not recant. He fails. I'm getting lazy. 17 and 16. 15 breaks the pillar scattered eye. It's going to be an 8. What is the 8?

Northwest, same way. 14. 13 and a half. 6 is a reaction. 13 and a half? Yeah. With a plus 10 to hit, I need to roll a 1 or 2. Damn, that's okay. So 13 and a half, roll for damage. It's okay.

15 down. 15 damage. Yeah, 15 damage. She's going to hit it. Wait. No, 27 and a half. He'll hit it southwest. So 27, 26.

52 has his reaction, but... 26. 25, 24, 23, 22, 21 and a half. To you? Yeah, um, I am gonna try it. You have to. You absolutely have to.

Oh, yeah. I'm gonna use, I'm gonna use my inspiration. I'm 16. What's my plus to hit on this? Your proficiency plus strength or Vex? Assume you have plus three. I do have plus three. So 21? You are just shy. It's 22 and a half. No, that was 21 and a half.

22 and 1. Oh, no. Oh shit. Blam! Oh my goodness! We have got a game on our hands. This is a very tense situation. So close. Chutz win! Chutz wins! I mean, I mean, I'm not. We're literally off by one.

Yeah, slight two. All right. So I'm going to roll a D20 because that was on our side. Come on down to the Lenses Lodge. Literally, this is the last game and whoever scores wins. That's horrifying. Come on down to the Lenses Lodge

sitting on faces for more than 100 years. Got to get up. Hey! Terrible. Have you thought of going into business with the point of years and fabulous rears? I'm just the announcer. Why can I hear you?

Sorry. All right. Romp for initiative. Are those the voices in your head? The bar? Ooh, baby. Oh, no. In the reset, can I have the gazpacho cast something on me?

Yeah. Get sweaty. I'm going to take advantage on that. Should we get rid of these two? Yeah, get rid of the beans. Oh, where do you want to be? Right here. Where do you been?

So I will recommend something for future games. I think that between each game, you should do a short rest. A full short rest. A full short rest? I think that would overpower certain classes than not. They could.

There are certain classes that need it. But if you think about if you had a warlock, right? A warlock has two spells then for the entirety of all four games. Tough. There's definitely different ways to balance this. And honestly, like, I'm not... I put these rules together with not thinking about...

Especially considering the fact that these guys have plus 10 to hit and we have, like, plus five. They have, like, double our chance to hit. So things like that can be really helpful for... You're not wrong because I assume you guys are going to throw a bunch of the crafty shit the players throw at, like, the brick walls that are the monsters. That's equivalent.

So I will consider that. And I will take that into consideration going into... the final round, assuming that you actually succeed. Let's find now. We are air-clicable news. Yeah, see, what do you got? Oh, I'm first, oh, 24. 23. 23. 23. 19. What do you got, 10? Uh-huh. It's hard to believe we're in the final round.

Ravioli. Seven. I got a six. Two. Two. 21. Damn. It's the only. as a little on. All right. It's hard to believe we're in the final round now. We're looking at a round

that looks like Yancey Tootles, then 77, 34. Oh, sorry, sorry, Yancey Tootles, 77, 34. Six. Yikes. 52. Oh, boy. 93. Babar. Raviola and Jeannie. Raviola. I love raviola Jeannie. I love raviola starring Wild Wild Smith. But that doesn't mean that Yancey isn't going first. Let's see if our drunken master

can master some drunken. Oh, God. This is so dangerous. Okay. I'm gonna, I'm gonna fucking... And you're gonna want to help around the goal. That's gonna hit. Fuck, that's gonna be six points to hit.

I'm just gonna, bonus action. Yeah, fucking clobber that fucker. Uh, shit. So, 16. That's a tie. There's a tie, so that hits. Can I use a key to do an additional? Yeah.

For one. Yeah. If you're bad at it. Actually, no, there's no reason. I'm not going to be able to hit it. So that is an additional seven on top of that. So 20, 23? Yeah.

Which direction? What's the most optimal way? Diagonally? Now diagonal goes to see that goal. Yeah. Right? This diagonal? Yeah.

Yeah. You just got to make it the reaction. You just got to make it the reaction. You just got to make it. 27. 27. 22. 277 has the bat's the other way around.

Right? Yep. Yeah. 22. It's okay. Just done. Yeah. 22. 21. 20.

19 and a half. It enters 34s. Which one? 34. Miss. 19. It enters 6's range. Sixes range.

Yeah, he'll take it. For 19.22 to hit. That's it. For 12. So he's going to take it to 31. Wow, that Yancey really has a, it makes a good front man. But it looks like he's going to send it southwest in response. 30 and 93 could take a hit.

29, 28. Scattered. Scatter. That's going to be southeast. 27, 26. Should I go for it? I don't think it's working here. Yeah, no.

I didn't even get a 20, yeah. 25, 24, 23, 22 and a half. So I would take 12 points of damage? Have I let it hit me? No. Yeah. But then it would scatter. Yeah.

You have your action? There's only one... What would I have to hit? 22 and a half, so you need 22. There's only a one and eight chance that you'll lose the game if you if you cut fuckers up. I'm gonna try and hit it. try and hit up. 21.

Ah, so close again. Gosh. So it'll be 22 there. And I'm just going to take it because I don't want it going past me, so I'm going to take the 12 points of damage. 12 points to you. And the scatters.

So we don't want, what, a 6? The number that will lose the game for you as a 6. So it's going to go, we said 20. Oh, okay. Alright, back the way it came. Yeah. So that's going to be, we said this was 22.

It's going to be 21. Wow, that was a close one. That was really sweet. Now you could try to crush it. Fuck up. Nope. 17, 16, 15, 15. 15 and a half.

14 and a half. Where's the current trajectory? It's going to 6. It's going to 6. At 14 and a half. Fifty two will hold. 14. 13 and a half.

93 has its reaction as well. So it would have to be at 14 here for 93. Oh, 93 will make it. 14 he hits. That's gonna look like a 13. He'll hit it south. It's 26.5. So 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20.

19 and a half. Yeah! Kill me. Kill me everyone. Please. I wish to shuffle off my mortal coil. He explodes. How about air?

19. So nine points of damage. Oh. Oh. Wow. He's done with them we find. The ricochets. Oh.

Yeah. Backward. It's going to go south. South. Uh, 18, 17. 17. 16. You want to use your reaction?

This is the lowest point. You can't do it at tax. No, I don't mean to you. Right. This is the lowest point 16 that he could take the reaction. So you want to use it and send it away. As could our girl over here. I...

16. I don't think it's worth... I need to say my reaction because I mean only that. Yeah. Yeah. You may take any reaction if you like it's 16. Or letting it get all good stuff. It's fine.

It's right. It's so much. I wish to pass on. Beyond my mail. How much is left in it? 16? 16. I'm going to I'm going to let it because it's going straight back, so

I'm going to let it get up to the Ansi. So you're going to let it pass. So it's going to be right here at 15.5. 15.com. Golden. 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10.

Please don't sue us out the ass. Well, Tootles, it's your turn. So honestly, you should have taken one because you would get your reaction back right now. Please, please don't sue us. So you should do that. Looking at 15 and a half. 15 and a half.

Please please don't sue us. Yeah. So that's at 15 and a half. So 25 and a half. So 25 and a half. You could just send it screaming back at 77. Yeah, you could send it 70. Well, he has his reaction.

So, right. So this does not quite hit where I was hoping it would. You end up coming down all the way over here. And then you come up this direction and we lift through. So you could just try to kill somebody. Yeah. I would send it straight down to 77. Because 93 and 52 can't do anything.

So you said 25 and a half. So 25. Sorry. Ninety three, are you taking the reaction? What? Ninety-three. He took his reaction. Fifty-two has not.

I don't. What is it? You can't even do it. You can't even do it. That's how you're fucking up now. Then I don't, then just do what we did before. Yeah. As long as we're in agreement.

Yeah. This is more reasonable. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, do it. Only, like, really shitty. Have you used your bonus reaction? It's your bonus action?

It's not our turn. It's going to be my reaction, but my turn isn't. No, it's fine. So 25, we gotta get 20, we got to get 25. I love because it's still Yancy's turn. Either way, we don't have great shots, but we don't want to explode ravioli here and have it bounce

off in a random fucking direction. So either way, you're going to get the same way. He's going to get it that way. Yeah, just it that way. 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17 and a half, 34. He doesn't have his reaction. He doesn't have any reaction.

17, it goes to six. What I say? 17, 16 and a half, 16, 15 and a half, 15, 77. 15. He hits with a natural 15. He's going to put 13 smoke on it. So we're looking at 28? And he's going to ascend it.

Northeast? Yeah, northeast. 27. Northeast. Not southeast. You're going southeast. No. Sorry.

The northeast is that one. So it's going back to what we came. Yeah. 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17, 17, 16 and a half. Can you turn back on our pill of music please? Oh, sorry. We've lost that. It's gotten tired of our shenanigans.

16 and a half. Just just wailing. You have to. I mean, you've got to. I would think I... I mean, no, I'm just going to talk out of the way. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's fair.

But if you... Okay. Oh, but if it hits and we roll... Correct. So the... So if you, if you use your reaction, you guarantee and you hit you guarantee you get away. If you miss, then you still have to dodge anyway.

So it's up to you. If you think you're still going to... I don't even know what the turn order is. I'm like dead. My brain's so melted. My... Save it. Dodge.

I'm gonna... No. I'm gonna try to hit it. Okay? Yeah, okay. 15 hit. You miss. You miss.

So now you have to dodge anyway. Because we said 16 and a half? 16 and a half. So you missed by one. You've lost your reaction. Yep. Dodge, I easily dodge. 16, 15, 14.

Mm-hmm. I don't have a reaction. 13, 12, 11, 10. Well, this isn't bad. Okay. Kelsey, it's your turn. So shame the reaction. So I'm gonna come over one, two, cast a jump.

Okay. And then three, four. It's actually better to keep the thing over here than they all have to go. Then we can go. I think it's reasonable. All right, 77th's turn. Mm-hmm. So he gets his reaction back.

They're all getting their reactions back. Doesn't they have to go. This is the perfect spot for it to be. Uh, he's gonna take a step backwards. That's the conclusion of his turn. conclusion of his turn. 34? Without any more spell slots.

34 is going to run behind 6 and that'll be the conclusion of his turn. That gives him his reaction bag. Six is going to dash 60 feet forward south and get his reaction back. 52 is going to... Can he make it in 30 feet? Nope. They're going to be this one way. He's going to dash into you, Yancey.

And you're going to need to make a athletic or acrobatic... I'm not afraid of you. Oh, maybe I am. Athletics, that'll be a hot... We're acrobatics. Acrobatics, that'll be a hot 10. With the 19, you get knocked prone. Ah, fuck.

And he'll stay where he is at that space. two and then 93 will he can't make it either but he'll dash to the ball who 93 bad bar you're up the reactions here what the fuck am i going you just jump you just like a leap over there you're staring the leader 93 in the face yeah i'm gonna hit this thing with everything i got I'll have more stall slots though which sucks. So I'm gonna like tickle the ball. 19.

Tickle the balls. Um, max damage at 8. So 18. Uh, 93 can react at 18. If they have a reaction. They do. They do.

Everybody does. Um, he'll take it. Uh, natural three. Yay. So then it will be 17.5 for 52. 17 and a half for 52. Yeah. 17 16 15 15 15 14 14 13 wow did I really fuck that up yeah my brain's going so 13 in inch 34's range 34

34 excuse me my brain's going to 34 we'll take it and he'll go how much is it 13 13 he definitely hits 12 points of momentum. So, 55, which direction? He's going to... He'll hit it right backwards. 24, 23, 22, 21, 20. I have my reaction. I'm going to try to use it.

Meet it. Seven points of damage. I'm sending it right back, 27. 26, 25, 24, 23, 22. It enters 34. He uses reaction. So it's going to be 20...

What did I see? 24? 24 so it'll be 23 and a half it'll hit him he's gonna try to dodge it out of the way what is it 23 he fucking failed like crazy gangbusters we won we won a 7 we want a 7 we want a 7 I got so so fucking excited uh 6 5 4 is gonna be southeast so back the same fucking way it came after he takes 12 13 points of damage 15 points of damage okay 23 he takes 10 what number is that 34 so that's 23 22 21 21 20 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14 and a half. He doesn't have his reaction. Yeah, I mean, dodging, oh, fuck, but if it hits me, well.

Well, it hits your 14 and a half. You dodge. I dodge. 14, 13, 12, 11, 10. Man, things are getting very sweaty out there on the field. Everybody's working their goddamn ass off. So you have your reaction back. And you have the bad.

Just swing it in. If we get lucky. So, well, hear me out. Think about what you want to do. You go for the pillar, we get lucky. We'd punch in him. And then if we'd go into this guy, he doesn't have his reaction.

You're up, really. So we've got two shots basically off the pillar. If you scream it right at the pillar to get lucky and try to punch it. Yeah, scream it right at the pillar. Unless you have a way to, fucking, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm sorry First of all fucking

Oh yes I think I think I think Pillar should have a shot Personally You put your bonus action I'm just using I will use Gaspacho

To come over And he is going to attack it And range And range Okay He's gonna He's gonna throw a paddle

He's gonna throw a He's gonna A spit Fire Grease Add in with a 16. It hits. That hits.

By and Greece is not something we've ever seen on the field. Six. Six. So how far is it going to go? 16. Only 16. So it'll go 10, 15, sorry. 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10. It's not going to reach the pillar. Yeah, it'll hit there.

Is there a way that we can make it bounce into the goal, though? From this point? Or if we send it a different direction. I don't think so. Does he have his reaction here? Six. None of us have his reaction. All of us don't.

All of these does. Six does. So, no matter how. The only other way you don't get the reaction is coming up this way. That's going to go. And it's still going to be. Yeah, I'll send it this way. So how far to go?

16. Oh, yeah. So. You do. It's okay. 13, 12, 11, 10. All right. All right.

Um, oh my god No, no, no. It's just gonna hit 17. Because it was a range. 10 40, 50, 60, yeah, that's right. Yeah, now. His turn? Oh, it's Rabioi's turn. Yeah, he'll still his turn. You just goad for 77. You know, the only downside is he's got the fucking sword.

Yeah. So I just, you'd have to hit it really hard. And he has a... He has a reaction. Okay, so I have a spell called Catapult Where an object He's been saving this shit An object within 60 feet of me I can point it and throw it in a straight line

90 feet in a direction that I choose So is that considered just nine damage Because 90 feet would be equivalent Nine points of damage So I think am I able to So I guess I need to pick one of these directions Right? Yeah So if I picked it, would it be just as if I hit it for nine?

How does this spell work? I can choose an object within 60 feet of me that weighs between 1 and 5 pounds. That isn't being worn or carried. The object flies in a straight line up to 90 feet in a direction I choose before falling to the ground. Stop it early if it impacts against a solid surface. It will strike a creature. It makes a deck saving throw on a failed save. It would move 90 feet, but it would not be the same as momentum, so the DC would remain the south.

Okay. So it's already to cross that. So then I'll just throw a firebolt at it. That hit, it's gonna stop, right? Yes. And then I want to do straight at him, right? Yeah, I think that's fine. After how much damage?

We'll see. It's gonna sail and know it was warm. So it's gonna be 13 and a half at this, or sorry, 12 and a half to enter 17's range. 77's range. At 12 and a half. That's gonna be a natural one. He's gonna miss. So now he can dodge all the way.

He's gonna try because he knows the danger therein. What's the DC? 12 and a half, so 12. He rolled a 9 and his dexterity is plus 1, so he has a 10. So it's gonna hit him for two points of damage and we're looking for a 3 for the win. It does no points of damage, but what are we looking for? A 3, a 3. A 3.

A 3. quest and it was at 12 and a half so it's going to be 12 11 10 so exactly the same place it was in before yeah okay what the fuck Gina you're up Kerr-ball fire bolt up I could try yeah I guess I'm just gonna I'm gonna try the way is the way is the game gonna I'm gonna try the same exact thing 15 natural 15 to hip so yeah Can you bonus action? Huh? How's you going to get up there?

No. Bonus. Oh, is it only with the paddle? Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, because you're next to it so you can move there. Okay, got it, got it, got, got it. I don't think I actually clarified that, but that would be a 10.

Yeah. Do I want to twist the fake? It doesn't make it a 10, so that way it's 20, it makes it harder for him to hit it. Are we trying to crush it back at 77? Yeah. Yeah, because we want him to dodge it. Yeah, it's a perfect. Okay, so I'm using one, and it's a 10.

Okay, so 20 now total. Thanks for those, switch the face, everybody. Yeah, thank you. 18 and a half because he doesn't have the reaction. 18 and a half, to dodge, uh, nope, nine. Okay, so he takes eight points of damage. And we need a three. And we need a three.

Uh, how much does he take? Eight. What number? Uh, 77. And he's hurting. Ooh. And a three. To, one of three.

One, three. Fry. Five. One of three. Four. So it's going to be... Southeast. 18.

Does 34 reaction? 34 does not. 17, 16, 15, 14, 14. 13 and a half. He does not have a reaction. 13 on B. I'm going to take it. I'm going to take it.

Three points of damage and scattered out. Yep. One, that's north. Who? Right to 52. Who does not have a reaction? Two points of damage and scatterdye if he can't dodge. 12.

Uh, he dodges. So, 10, right there. Um, it's easy's turn. Send it in, neither one of them has the reaction. Is it?

Oh, it's over. It's over. Neither one of them has the reaction. But I'm prode. So stand up and move. Hold on. You can you bonus dash? Yeah, bonus dash to that and dash.

Oh. Let's drive. Stand up. Bonus action dash. Dash. And then just don't whiff. Don't fucking whip this. All right.

It's a 10 to hit. Your next, though. Oh, my God. Did you roll a two? I got a 12. I got a 12. Oh. So now you guys have to roll more than like three points of damage.

Yeah, that's it. Here we go. Yay! Ah! They're sending it in. Chugs win. Chugs win. And boom goes the spellscrow.

Roll a 20. I'm saying this to 4. 17. 17. Lady Morbron's miracle maids wants you to know that we haven't taken a clean job in almost 90 years. And that's where we'll end

the night session. Yay, we did. Oh, my God. She's like, dead house and the mix. Trusts we're joking. Thank you so much for listening. to the Legends of Aventures podcast.

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