lemonparty - 101: Driving Miss Crazy

Episode Date: October 1, 2024

Use code "LEMON" to get 50% off your first order at Ruby's Flowers H*mp Farm. Directly from their farm to your home! NEW MERCH: https://lemonparty.myshopify.com/ more episodes: https://www.patreon.com/lemonparty live dates: https://www.lemonparty.life/livedates ben avery: https://www.instagram.com/benaveryisgood/ https://twitter.com/benaveryisgood devan costa: https://www.instagram.com/devanjamescosta/ https://twitter.com/DevanCosta jace avery: https://www.instagram.com/saddrawingsbyjace/ https://twitter.com/JaceAvery  website: https://www.lemonparty.life/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwlbiNZoV2RpNygeOQZnQ0Q Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3RRoTJ1TV0hLtkKOtT2Mc5?si=60641c5188294084&nd=1 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lemonparty/id1651896150 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm a chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken, I'm on that hype being always in my face. Talking, listening. Girl, I had the best of reasons. Devin, who you calling? Hello? Hi.

This is Benny Haan of Santa Monica. Hi. Can I make a reservation for July 2025 for three? Yes. Yeah. OK, yes. Yeah, okay, yeah. So for three, we have a podcast to keep afloat. Our wives are depending on that Benihana order.

So we can be right up front. He's gonna do tricks. He'll do tricks. He'll throw them in our mouths. Tell him not a Mexican, a real Asian guy. Yes, we're not Mexicans. This is, no, we have a Mexican, a real Asian guy. It's not, yes, we're not Mexicans. This is, no, we have a lot, okay. So yeah, July, okay, July 3rd, 2025.

Thank you! Alright, bye. Guys, we're good. We're good. No more fights, guys. No more fights. The next year of the podcast is smooth salence. Oh shit, you're so loud.

I know, we either wanted to do that, or I was telling Devon it would be funny if we just started the episode with me not on the podcast. Well, I know it's a- It just acts like I've been fired. I am leaving the show. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And, you know, I mean, people might be a little upset now, but who's taking my place is Clay. Clay is Clay. Clay is the new guy on the show everybody. Clay is the new third Mike. I'm leaving. I can't do this. It's too stressful for me.

I'm actually getting replaced by John, so everybody's happy. Nobody's got a problem. Then with John and Clay. Yep. And they just fight every day. No, no, no. New rule, we only talk about the Boston comedy scene

in the 1980s. That's the new rule. You make John wear the little news boy cap. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. So now we saw everybody loved the Joshua Tree episodes. No complaints.

So everything's good. Yeah, a lot of people enjoyed it. A lot of people did enjoy it. It was a big bash. It was a big bash. It was ultimately it was ultimately very good for us, I think.

And we got to a good place. We did. I think it was the healthiest thing the show's ever done. And I think as time goes on, people will learn to appreciate it. I understand it wasn't like great will learn to appreciate it. I understand it wasn't like great listening. Yeah it was very uncomfortable but it was a conversation

and we just want to get this out of the way up front. It was a conversation that kind of. No this is the entire episode. What if what if we're like we're all good and then by the end like I'm choking you like Bart Simpson. What if every episode is the exact same clay busts in with like a steak dinner. I start eating. I'm smoking you like Bart Simpson. What if every episode's the exact same? Clay busts in with a steak dinner. I start eating, I'm smoking cigarettes. John and Joey are blowing a firework. People just keep coming and going. John brings a cactus to fall into.

No, it was an ultimately good thing and it was a conversation that we needed to have. And I think we're in a really good place. I did wanna say up top, very- Yeah, cause we call each other now like the girls in Ghost World. We do.

Where I feel like I'm on my bed with like my feet up in the air and I have like a hamburger phone or something. And I'm trying on- And I'm just talking to Jace about our like childhoods and stuff. I'm trying on skirts and I'm going, fuck him, he's an asshole.

But I'm talking about our dad. No, I wanted to say very quickly up top and not to be unfunny and gay. Fuck him, he's an asshole. But I'm talking about our dad. Now I wanted to say very quickly up top and not to be unfunny and gay. Take your time. We're gonna take our time. Being unfunny and gay. They love that shit. Listen, it's what I'm best at.

Jace, it's your brand, stick with it. It's my brand, be unfunny and gay. And every one week of year, people will message you that they really appreciate it. Jace, the Avery brand, it's the Avery brand. brand be unfunny and get be really self-serious to the point that you ruin your entire life the Avery brand No, it was I I just wanted to say a lot of people were coming after Ben for the birthday thing and I fucked up On that one that was not true.

Ben did not forget my birthday. It was me being an anxious fuck and Ben was in England. I was convinced that he was about to forget my birthday and I obsessed over it and it was a self-fulfilling prophecy. We were gonna do it on Saturday, just get a dinner before I went to go see Kelly in Cape Cod and I texted Katie I texted Katie I was just like are we doing my birthday? I don't even give a shit, which is not true I did give a shit and then she's like, yeah, I think Ben's flying in

He might be a little tired. Do you want to do it Saturday or Sunday? And I go, oh, you forgot fucking you know, fuck it then and I was like, I don't even want to do it and I basically were going here for your actual birthday in I was going I was going in Cape Cod We were trying to do something beforehand But it was me being convinced because of anxiety and overthinking that you had forgotten and you had it and been in Katie Completely thought I just didn't want to do anything. No we had gifts for you I know we had everything and it was just it was a fuck-up on my part We later got to that point and we've-

But it was, I responded with anger and I was being an asshole because I thought you were like trying to malign me and which is not true. It was and I was just saying what I thought was reality at the time. But that's still not okay that I get angry and then you get really sad and then that's both a way to cut off. It's different ways to control the other person and shut them down. And I talked very fucked up to you,

which we've, me and Jason talked on the phone now for like five or six hours. We really did, since the episode aired. Probably the most honest conversation we've ever had. Yeah, I think it was the thing where- Which is beautiful, thank God. Fucking finally. Can I say one, well we all had a very honest conversation after.

We did, we did, but let's not lack like, you know, listen, I wasn't popped out of your mom's bosom. You did the most. I wasn't a part of this whole thing. You did the most talking. Yeah, this was really all your fault, Devin. I did the most talking? You did, but you were drunk,

so you probably thought a minute passed by. Not on the episode. No, no, I was saying after, so here's. Oh, afterwards. So some people were mad that the the patron episode cut off. That's what we're talking about, by the way. Avant-garde. People want to know what happened after it cut off.

What happened is me and Jay started to fuck. We started making out. We've I'm by the way, I'm always top. Yes. Jayce is always bottom. And I recorded. I recorded the way. I'm always top yes, Jace is always bottom. I recorded the claps Are you there with like the thing they were I was monitoring the the claps per second I had a club I buy I go on a gay website. It's like a monitor You have one of those counters for when they do world records breaks down claps per second

And you guys were going crazy. Thank you, buddy. You fucked him good. It felt good. The claps got so high that you couldn't hear them, it was more of a frequency type of thing. Yes. Yeah, it was the same as the ringtone that teachers can't figure out.

But no, and then after Ben came inside my asshole. And I was doing this. Ben had the Mission Accomplished poster behind him And I was doing this. Ben had the mission accomplished poster behind him. I witnessed all this. Well this is how we saw pros when we were kids. My mom would go, why don't you guys go to your room and fuck? Well Ben.

That's what she would tell us. Ben brought up, he goes, I never wanted to bring this up because I know how much you molested me, I remember that. And I said, well to make it up to you, I'm really sorry, why don't you fuck the shit out of me right now? And now we're good. We're fine. Mm-hmm So the word mo mo last by the way mo less. Yeah, I like a black guy Well kind of like getting lested is like a good thing but getting mo last. Yeah over doing. Yeah, he was mo list

Yeah, they did they mo lasted. Yeah, that was too much They need a less less in my opinion in my black ass opinion No, I'm really glad that you fucking you mentally old people Honestly it was because uh, yeah, well listen, it's been a crazy week seeing seeing the shit online and Everything it's a no one's correct It's been a crazy week seeing seeing the shit online and everything It's a no one's correct This that was that was a great. I'm very happy that that happened it needed to happen

There it was that was that was beautiful like honesty just being exposed and and It's not... Anybody's fucking narrative of it is not correct. And I'm just happy that it finally fucking happened. Yeah, and I think... Because I hate tiptoeing around shit. Well, I think that's what me and Ben, we spent a lot of time on the phone

kind of talking a lot of shit out. And I think what had happened is we realized that we've always loved each other. And we always have been always loved each other and we always have been there for each other in those bad moments. Ben has been there for me in my deepest, darkest moments. And I've been there for him. The problem was just where we grew up, we didn't know how to talk to each other about

hard stuff. And so we just never did because the same fucked up shit happened to us, but we reacted to it in different ways. So if we tried to talk about stuff, it just wouldn't go well, so we stopped. And then in talking it out and actually diving into, you saw the first 13 minutes of a five hour, I think, queuing conversation.

Yes. And people unfortunately saw me erupting in a very fucked up way at you, which I don't talk to you that way and I don't talk to people that way. That was insane. And they also saw me say something that was not true. I thought it was true at the time

that made Ben seem like an asshole. Because I was getting defensive because I was like what the fuck? It's still not okay to react that way. I should be cool in the pocket. I should start smoking cigarettes again. I should leave my family. You should start drinking

and you gotta ditch that baby. It's been ruining your life. But we got to a place where we kind of rehashed stuff and we went through and we're like, oh all these things we thought were like grudges or hate or whatever, it was just almost always just misunderstandings that we never talked about. And then you just get static electricity

just growing in the air. And then you just get static electricity just growing in the air. And then you can't even get close to each other because then all of a sudden sparks start hitting because there's just too much shit in the air. And that's just kind of gone to, I think, ahead over the last couple months or so. And I'm really glad we had that talk because I do feel like our relationship

is at a better point than it's ever been at. And I really do believe that. I think... Yeah, we don't have to talk about the past anymore. We can just move forward and... And if something fucking weird comes up, we can just talk about it. We can talk about 1945 all we want,

in terms of the past. We can get to the important stuff. Yeah, Hitler. But yeah, it's just that we just had to go through that and it looked really ugly at the start. But we had a moment yesterday, we were talking on the phone, because we were like, let's dive into just honest talk,

let's just keep doing it. And there was a moment on the phone where I felt you loosen up and I felt myself loosen up in a way I just haven't felt. You were like, finally it could fit. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha fit. Thank God for poppers. Using that asshole. You boys get in that room

and you fuck each other's brains out and I don't want either of you to come out till you come two or three times each in each other's mouth. If you don't come out dick and ass, pro-permeant, I'ma kill you. You gotta fuck north and south. None'm gonna kill you. Yeah. You gotta fuck north and south.

None of this east and west shit. We're gonna fuck state this year. In the ass. Right. You're preparing for the state championship. You're like, now I know there's gonna be a lot of black dicks out there. Y'all ain't familiar with it, but you can fuck it just like a white dick. Don't let that distract you.

Don't let that distract you. That's what the blacks want. Stay in it. Stay in it. Get in it now. Stay in it. like a white did. Don't let that distract you. Don't let that distract you. That's what the blacks want. Stay in it. Stay in it. Get it now, stay in it. Stay in the pocket.

Stay in the pocket, son. Listen, I taught you my whole life, I taught you, you fuck your brother better than the blacks will. Because that's- You fuck him like a black. Better than the black would do. That's blood. Full ass, empty balls, can't lose. And that's West Texas football.

That's gay West Texas football. That's West Texas relationships. West Texas six man butt fucking. That's that down home West Texas therapy. We are all open and honest with each other. I'm so happy you fucking guys finally spoke. Oh my god, you guys. Well, we all did.

It was a three man thing. We all did, we all did. We got a lot of shit. But let's be honest. I'm not you two. There's a, you guys are a giant, you guys are your own universe The Avery's are a powerful force. Mm-hmm. You both like don't understand that we weren't gonna make fat jokes about Jason

That was we ultimately got to a point Devin and Ben finally worked up the courage to tell me they don't like me because I'm Yeah, they said being fat is evil we don't like me because I'm fat. We're being fat is evil. Yeah, so they said being fat is evil, we don't like that, so we want you off the show. They had me on a strict, they locked me in a cage, so I can't eat. It's, Jace, being fat is a bad vibe. It is a bad vibe. It's a, it's a...

I'm getting bad vibes from you. You're taking up too much vibe, and that just won't, that won't do it. Yeah. No, but like, yeah, together you guys are the fattest people alive. And... And, no, but like yeah together you guys are the fattest people And no you you guys are an incredibly special

Comedy force and if you guys aren't on the same page it makes for odd It makes for odd quality of work You know and and and people are kind of wondering like yeah, they're funny, everyone's being funny, but what's really going on right now? There's something in the air. Right. You know? And for you guys to finally let that all out

is incredibly brave and honest, and I hope that people, as time goes on, people realize that, by the way, that argument was like not, that was something that probably should not have been released. Yeah, we actually fucked up by putting that out. Also, if you have brothers at all, you know that brothers fight.

Right, and also- One of the OG stories in the Bible is like Cain and Abel. It's just a classic, brothers just are born to fight and love each other. They fight and then just are born to fight and love each other. They fight and then at the end they say they love each other. That's how it works. And they fuck in their room. Regardless of age of consent laws or incest laws

in the state that you're in. That's what you're raised to do. You fuck each other. 100%. Completely correct, Ben. Thank you. Yeah. I was a big kid so I raped all of them.

I just got them in a pile. You got them in a big litter. Yeah, yeah. I played you guys. You know how a seal plays the little horns? Yeah, sure. It goes like, brum, brum, brum, brum, brum, brum, brum. Absolutely.

At the circus. I did that with their ass holes. Yeah. All right, boys, pile in the car. Y'all get raped by Jace. All right, we're going to to the wood, she can rape me. But no, I didn't finish this, but there was a moment on the phone

where I felt myself relaxed and I felt Ben relaxed. And I said for the first time in a long time, we're not talking to each other just as brothers, but like actually as friends. And I really wish we didn't air that. People have no idea that we weren't friends until we started drinking. I didn't become friends with you until I was like 22.

We were late bloomers with everything. There was too much history. There was too much weird shit and we just didn't. Here's the weird history, by the way. I thought babies came out of the butt when I was 17. Yeah. Wow. Think about that.

Think of the type of retard that's talking into a microphone right now. Think about that. And I the type of retard that's talking into a microphone right now. Think about that. And I thought stand up comedy was a good clear path. And then think about that same retard and think about how he tells you how everything is. Think about how Ben sits here. Oh, by the way.

On a constant basis telling you how life is. Hey everybody, we got Ruby's Flowers back and Devan, you're gonna be excited. We got a new copy for Ruby's flowers Oh my god. So here we go everybody Your favorite lemon party sponsor Ruby flowers hemp farm here And unfortunately, they have a confession to make after making an inappropriate joke comparing burning Zaza to Israel burning Gaza Zaza to Israel burning Gaza.

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a legal loophole because for once politicians being dumbass boomers worked in favor of this nation's most oppressed demographic the stoner I don't care for that type of language. Those people work hard for us I just emailed me gay porn. Oh the guy no just some guy He goes I thought you would think this is really I hope this is not too beyond the pill But I think you'll find this pretty funny. I laughed my ass off myself It's a guy covering himself at his own shit while jacking off. That's pretty funny.

And that guy smoked Ruby's flowers. Yeah, like, how is this? Like, I'm going to put it on the TV to laugh my ass off. And people are trying to cheer you up. Yeah. And to be fair, I think it's a very good bet, actually. Did you send somebody gay porn? It's a fantastic bet. But had a good laugh about this one.

They fuck each other. Remember during COVID, when everybody was doing it, for the first time, everybody was doing it, and they were like, oh, did you check out this news article? And then you clicked it, and it was the black guy with the huge dick. That was fun. Then we needed that.

There was a guy putting poop in his mouth and jacking off. Yeah, gay people are sick. They do sick things, they're going out. Wait, is this in the ad copy for Ruby's flowers? Yeah, keep it in. What I'm saying is in the ad sickos. Wait, is this in the ad copy for Ruby's Flowers? Yeah, yeah, keep it in. What I'm saying is in the ad copy, what Ben has said is in the ad copy. So I just-

And scene. And scene. And- If you get Ruby's Flowers, you will no longer go to hell. You'll no longer go to hell unless you have gay sex again, in which case you will be impure. Ruby's Flowers has sent us all a lot of their products. They're sending more, by the way. And me and Devin have both used it.

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Oh, hooey. Thanks Ruby's Flowers, and now back to the show. We're going to get into, I've been fasting for three days and reading about Mandalay Bay. I got to the bottom of it, Jay's continuing. Oh, you figured it out? Mm-hmm, okay. Well, that was just all it, Chase Kudainia. Oh, you figured it out? Mm-hmm. Okay.

Well, that was just all it was. He just kept reading the buffet menu. It was like they ran out of shrimp, he got so mad. He said, I'm gonna kill 60 people and injure 750. But real quick, so we have an honest. It was the salad. You love the buffet menu too! How dare you, fatty!

You leap over the table. When you guys remarked how much weight I lost when I walked in. Yeah. Both of you remarked. You have been losing weight because you're wearing like one of those like sweat whisking shirts.

I wear this all the time. I know you do but it usually looks bad as shit. When you were a little. Now you look finally normal. Yeah when you were a little. Finally you look normal. No, no, no when Ben was a little bigger that hit the back of the closet for sure.

Back in the day, Ben would wear this and I'd go, why, maybe don't wear the shirt that completely hugs your tits. Yeah, that is the titty reveal. But now it looks good on you. I was gonna convert to Islam if I kept gaining weight so I could wear the big Saudi royal thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because I already have a picnic blanket with me at all times I figured I could just put it on my head sure and then you the good thing about being Muslim is you had the beer without The mustache of food could go in fast. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly But yeah, I don't know if there's anything else we need to say just other than we just got to a really good place and I I wish we hadn't have put it out because It's kind of insane to go through this and it's a very hard thing to go through, but it's good. And it's getting dissected by a thousand people.

But I'm very glad we had this conversation. And I- No, dude, it was great. There's no light without darkness. There's no life without death. You know what I mean? You needed that dark episode to... If you were happy all the time, it wouldn't mean anything.

It would stop meaning fucking shit at all. And if you didn't have difficult conversations from time to time, you're not having a real relationship. You need to have... A lot of people message me about their relationship with their brothers, and I would say that looked ugly, but it was the best thing that we've done in years. And it's the same way where you have to dive into

shit that fucking sucks and you don't wanna do it because on the other side is honesty and love and acceptance and understanding. And it's so difficult to dive through that, it's so scary. But the things that scare you have to do that. And I'm also sorry of being dismissive about your mental illness. It's okay, it's okay.

That's not okay with me. It's a tough thing to live around. The more we actually talked about your mental illness, I thought a lot of your mental illness was you not wanting to hang out with us. But it's your mental illness. And that's also why I'm like, fuck, it's been weeks, I haven't seen Jace.

We record, I go a week, I haven't seen Jase we record I go weak I don't see him. I fucking miss him trying to invite him to stuff, but it's just Something that I am more understanding of after we talked at length Yeah, specifically you unlocked a lot of things for me that you were telling me. Yeah I was even like stuff for you were like what about this? I was like, oh I didn't and Ben and Devon had a really honest conversation with me after. If that camera kept recording, you would have been like,

oh, Jace is an asshole. Devon and Ben revealed to me a lot of like how this anxiety and this worry manifests itself in ways externally that I didn't know. And it makes people think that I don't like them or don't wanna be around them. And it's not true. I just had no idea that

And I was shocked frankly That I made people sorry. I was thinking about a really yummy meal, and I got emotional Just thinking about a ruby Tuesday's commercially saw on the way over here. I was like two four two four ten ribs But now it just it was it was I was very glad we had it because so much stuff started to make sense and the more we talked we both realized that we were like oh we kept thinking that we hated each other like that the other person hate each other and it was like we were both feeling the exact same way and it wasn't true we just didn't we didn't know that yeah because we just hadn't

had that conversation that was those those that was very, very big of you. Just what you just said was I'm proud of that. That was that was really great. And proud of him. Yeah. And and and that night at more so. Yeah, just yeah. Oh, I got Devin now. Me a little bit. Come on.

No, Devin. But Devin equal. OK, well, Devin equal. Ben and actually a little bit more. And that's just a cherry on top of that. Ben, you hyper-focus on things. You have a real weird sick obsession with negativity. And you really love, you hear one thing about something and then you run with it on a really

detrimental toxic level and you're a bad person and No, but Ben Ben's issue is that Ben Ben will hyper focus on something and I make fun of you on Hate Watch all the time. You don't listen. But I make fun of you on Hate Watch. You probably don't listen to my show.

He's sitting right here. Devin, do you listen to Lemon Party with Ben Avery? Devin takes off his headphones, he has cotton balls in his ears. I'm not hearing a single thing. I don't hear a single thing. No, but I made fun of you on Haywatch the other day where I go, Ben likes to do this thing where he'll hear something about somebody,

and I go, yeah, apparently they're fucking, the guy, he's like, just like has scabs on his arms, he's just wandering the streets, he's completely homeless. I know. He's been talking about so many people. And you'll tell me about things and I go,

that's so funny, I'm dying, and then I'll go home and I'll look it up and I'll be like, yeah he's not, it's okay. The guy's not, the guy's not that fucked up. Ben was exaggerating for comedic purposes. Yeah. And I didn't realize I was doing the same thing with Ben, except it was I was seeing something small

and assuming it meant all these things about me. It's the exact same thing, but just opposite. It's almost like we're fucking yin and yang, man. It's trippy a little bit. Bottom line is we do the meanest show on earth. We do the meanest show, I imagine, I mean, I listen, maybe we're not, okay, go ahead and say somebody else's is way worse.

I do turn into an Anthony show, and I will say. Maybe we're not I don't okay go ahead and say somebody else is sure way worse Into Anthony's show and I will say oh Yeah, I mean people that are still allowed to be public to be fair There's a show in North Korea where they execute people live on air or slightly meaner All I mean is like we we do like it. I like to think like, you know, it's a tactful show, but we are in Insanely rude your kind of your beta cook. We, but we are insanely rude. You're a cuck. You're a beta cuck, actually. We're insanely mean. You don't go far enough.

I don't, yeah, no, I don't. Up foot that comment. I've only said people should kill themselves, die, actually faggot, retard every day. LA cuck? No, yeah. Yeah, we're just- West Coast elitist cuck? Typical West Coast, and these people,

they would never say what I say. I literally have said insane things.. I literally said insane things. We've all said insane things. But I'm saying- I said faggot on camera 5,000 times. Yeah, it's just- It's a Reddit word now, thankfully. Thank God.

It's back. I think honestly because of us. We carried the torch. We were the Rosa Parks of faggot. Anyway. It's that scene in Lord of the Rings when they light one torch and then the mountain over, they light another torch and it signals.

We were one of those torches and it eventually got to Reddit. And Reddit lit the torch and everyone said, faggot! At once. It was a beautiful moment. I hope. I like to think it was like the end of- Hand me that N-word torch over there.

I like to think it was like- What do you mean, a torch? No. No. No. No. Very good. Very good.

Very good. I like to think it was like the end of the road where it's like are you carrying the light and we were the last Guy after we got canceled. We were the last guy saying faggot live And then we handed the torch to enough people where it burst back and burned bright and shiny But yeah, no. No. I mean guys. I'm so happy that that actually happened. Yeah ultimately No, I mean guys. I'm so happy that that actually happened. Yeah ultimately You guys are brothers. I've known you my entire life in comedy at least I think I met you guys a year and a half into me doing comedy

Yeah, we've all we've known each other about ten years almost a decade We became we became really really really good friends immediately. That's right. We were leaving shows and open mics and whatever, going back to my place, we would all talk shit together. And as time moves on though, things happen and shit moves in different ways and the wind blows a certain way. There was something going on. Sorry you weren't loud enough.

My presets turned off over there, I apologize. It's okay, I know. The biggest complaint about me is I'm not loud enough. Somehow you were still peeking at the beginning and I had your presets turned off. I don't know how that happened. I was peeking. Bizarre.

What are you gonna do about it? But you know, anyway. Anyway, Devin, your huge point. What are you gonna do about it, but you know what anyway anyway Devin your huge point I? Just I'm so happy that you guys can Can actually talk to each other man mm-hmm because there was a feeling on the show for a while where I was like I don't know if this is If this is capable of going on too long if there's not honesty right because we are the meanest show on earth And if we're the meanest show on earth we have to be all completely equally mean to each other

yeah, yeah, and and and And I think you guys have finally gotten to a place with each other because there was there was a there was a feeling of like I don't these two brothers like don't talk to each other how they should right and it was It was becoming like like strange to me and and and and kind of depressing because I've known you guys for so long But it's all worked out and I hope I Ben you pull up somebody that we could like completely annihilate? Yeah, I'd like to I wanted to I thought we were gonna talk about for maybe a minute and now we're 26 minutes in and everyone's calling us gay Well, so pull up somebody and I will be the most vicious maniac of all time. I got stuff ready

I've been says your email. I didn't attack you. I've been eating. Hey Ben your CC suck. What do you want me to say? Well, they're links. I haven't clicked them yet. Oh, click a link. Well all I'm saying is I fast, I didn't eat for 72 hours and I learned a shit load about the world. You know about that black guy that loves Hitler that used to eat a bunch of pizza in porn shops? Ah yes, the world.

Who? I'm gonna look him up right now. A black guy that loves Hitler Kanye He does need a lot of pizza for some reason this was this story No one was really talking about it and by the way everyone's like It was so funny Me and Devin fought about if we'd titty fuck AOC or not for like 15 minutes on the Patreon

and people go, fuck, I hate when they go political. Like, sincerely. Just the one thing they could find. I said you're a faggot about tits because you won't fuck AOC. Here they go again with their Bill Ma shit. Which is one of the greatest quotes I've ever heard. You're a faggot about tits.

But there were probably people at home who were like, yeah, we wouldn't wanna fuck Marjorie Taylor Greene. And they were like, goddamn. Who is Mark Hayes? He's the guy interviewing him. He's that cock on, well, I thought that was his name, hold on. Senator, Mark Hayes loves Hitler.

Hold on, hold on, hold on. These are videos of Trump golfing. Hold on. Which I would love to watch in are videos of Trump golfing. Hold on. Which I would love to watch in my free time. I'm gonna find him. I believe he's in North Carolina. I remembered the video and then I wrote it down on my phone on the way here.

He's running for Senator. Don't read what I'm typing in. That's all I'm saying. Running Senator loves Hitler. Don't read what I'm typing in. For the love of Christ, It's Mark Robinson is his name Oh, is he a black guy? Oh, he's what I said. He's black. That was the lead. I didn't bury that. Oh My god is a pretty black white name. Wow, I can't wait for this. Hold on

I'm gonna find the specific one that I really love Here hold on I the specific one that I really love. Hold on. I thought it was, I thought it was CNN. I love black Trump supporters. I know, this is pretty great. I wish I could be a black Trump supporter. It's so funny. God bless him.

Just making way people have panic attacks across this country. Yep. Is this the guy, I think I was reading about him that he Trump won't acknowledge him So he has to go around with cardboard cuts out cutouts of Trump and speak like do rallies with One acknowledge him why because he's black because he's black. Yeah, I don't buy that Trump loves black people If they're on his side, I was anyone on his side Devin. He's a fucking racist. Oh found have you seen mark cuban's Twitter? You fascist wait, what's this guy this con on it MSNBC? Oh this bag?

I thought it was his name fucking Warby Parker I forget his name. He doesn't he looks like Willy Wonka made common his. Warby Parker Scarborough or something is his name. Are positively freaking the heck out. I've been laughing about this all week so hard. You see the deadline to withdraw from the state's gubernatorial election is four hours from now. The state Republican party really wants it.

You know, unfortunately stuff like this is getting swept under the rug because there's like shootings and like. Right, half of the South is underwater. And water, yeah, but then this, there's gold. There there's more there's golden hills even by the standards of Donald Trump's hand-picked freaks and geeks Mark Robinson is a uniquely terrible candidate he's got a history open history of anti-semitism along with a bunch of other bigoted statements wait for it make grotesque anti-abortion ads

accusing women of not being responsible enough to keep your skirt down Just two weeks ago. He had to deny a report that he was once a five nights a week attendee Porn show it gets so good often brought up here. We go I'm a black Nazi he NC GOP nominee for governor made dozens of disturbing comments on porn That's what's great about it. He is doing all this at the porn shop that he frequents. We all say crazy things with our cock in our hand. Come on.

I've said that a million times. You know how many times I've come and I'm going like, I'm a black Nazi. I always type I'm a black Nazi. You're holding a gun to the hooker. You're like, call me a black Nazi. Call me a black Nazi. And I go, oh, you think I'm black?

Yeah. Look at these comments on these websites he's been making. They're so good. He said, slavery is not bad. Some people need to be slaves. I wish they would bring it slavery back. I would certainly buy a few. I got to say, that just sounds like someone's

unk in the kitchen at 1 AM. He's in his slides. And he's like, shit, they brought slavery back. I get me a couple. That's a house unc in the kitchen at 1 a.m. He's in his slides and he's like, shit, they brought slavery back, I get me a couple. That's a house unc, if I've ever heard one. That's a house unc. I do love guys whose brains would have just perfectly been Samuel L. Jackson in Django Unchained in the 1800s, but unfortunately they have to do

fuck white people griffs now. I'm tired of these motherfucking blacks on this motherfucking plane. He said he commented on a porn forum. He said I take Hitler over any of this shit that's in Washington right now, he wrote. Do you know what porn forum it was? It's just some like random one

I forget the name of it. It was like snow bunnies calm or something oh And that's the thing too. He they tried to get him on he used to love peeping on 14 year old Girls, but he or when he was a 14 year old he was peeping in the public gym. Yeah, but he was 14 Yeah, he said he still fantasized about it to this day. Mm-hmm, so I suppose I don't know You can't there's no consent in your imagination He was good. He thought that was the white showers. He's confused. They call it Neverland because no one says never You know what I mean? It's fantasy folks. It's it should they should call it. Yes and always land. Mm-hmm But they should call it yes means no land.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. You is, you is kind. You is a perv. You is a Nazi. You is a Nazi. You is a black Nazi. You is beautiful, baby. Yeah, the Hile help.

Folks? Folks! Hey! Hey! Hey! The show's back! Very good. Hey! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks!

Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks!

Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! Folks! He shows back! Woo! Woo!

Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! You got your church life. You got your home one, you know, you know, there was an intern for CNN They snuck in with a camera tape to his face just shaking and he's walking to a black church like he's exploring the Titanic Yeah, he's in blackface. Yeah, he's going undercover a bell LGBTQ actually they maybe they use the big mama's house suit like like a Martin Lawrence

They wanted in an auction Fourth house right here 450 450 450, five, five here, 550. It's just you raising your hand over and over again. Doing journalism for MSNBC. Yeah. There's no reason anybody anywhere in America should be telling any child about transgenderism, homosexuality, any of that filth.

And yes, I called it filth. That seemed to be a bit of a self-selection. To be fair, this is every black church in America at this moment in time. Yeah, I don't know what the big deal is about that. Yeah, I think MSNBC just figured out about black people. Yeah, this guy might as well be yelling about, and then we put some salt in the collard greens.

You can cook really good ribs in a filing cabinet. And you pour a little chicken broth and you cook it for seven hours. And they go disturbing reports about chicken being cooked by blacks. So the best thing he said, the best thing he said in regards to all this is he would go to his porn shop.

This porn shop he'd frequent to buy DVDs of pornography. He would bring himself a huge, like a large pepperoni pizza. He'd sit down, he would eat the pizza. I guess he knew them there. I'm not really sure what's going on at one of these shops. He would post on the porn forum from the porn shop while eating pizza and jacking off. And he'd just be posting like,

I love Hitler and I'm black. He's maybe, it's like Rob Ford actually, actually we found a contender right here. This is America's Rob Ford and I'm happy he's black. He's probably smoked crack, I'm not sure, but he's in a lit shit. Why is that? Because he's, come on dude, he's going to porn. He's going to porn shops. Sure. He's eating pizza at

By the way, imagine eating food in a porn shop. Okay Imagine bringing takeout. I've done it Yeah, he uh, he's definitely smoked crack. He definitely has met guys in hotels. You can tell by his lips, is that it? I'm just saying, don't contort my words, he's a good man who's an elder in his church. Sure. So what that he loves Hitler?

I think he loves white people so much that he's like, no, I'm gonna smoke meth. I'm gonna do what the white, the honkies do. I don't even like crack. I've just been laughing at the idea of a fat black guy eating pizza jacking off at Sanny Lomsey. Right, and the store owner lets him come in because he thinks it's Kanye West.

Some things are just kinda happening now, like where I'm like, is there like a gas leak? And I fell into a coma and I'm imagining, like I'm inventing, this is like a personage that's popping out of my head. No, no, no. It's a fat black guy eating pizza in a porn shop lady. Love you. We're blacks love Hitler Is this actually a thing? They think Hitler's gangster. I mean

You know Kanye did For a second, I think it's I think you love Farrakhan. Do you love Hitler? Well, I think it's it's I don't love Jews Let's a little we can like yeah, we can get to the bottom of they hate you so much Yeah, but they like blacks are not like they black blacks and Jews are not like copacetic. Mm-hmm. They're like, okay. Yeah Yeah, we were brought here on ships They're both fighting over the same goal and you guys get all the you know, you guys get all the fucking Tom Hanks movies He's a Tom Hanks movie where he's like, you know chained up to a boat That sounds excellent. I'd love that movie. I would watch that. You've got mail, but it's ma le

Because you bought yeah you bought slip you've got mail yeah, you bought a bunch of men that are gonna build your home So the next thing I really wanted to get to is, so is Will Ferrell's. Will and Harper? I watched it earlier today. That movie with Will Ferrell and his trans friend and it sucks ass, cause they really badly wanted something to happen

on the road trip. Nothing happens. So for anybody that doesn't know, Will Ferrell has a transgender friend. Who used to be the head writer at Saturday Night Live. Little fun fact, by the way, 11 years ago, I used to get that man Diet Cokes. Ah.

When I worked at the office. Andrew? Steel? Andrew Steel. He would come out of his office twice a day to grab Diet Cokes, I had to make sure I had Diet Cokes for him. And other name is Harper Steel.

And he would come out of his office, he would get his Diet Coke, he would turn to me and he would say, faggot, and he would just walk. He calls you faggot. He goes, you're a faggot. Now if you excuse me, I'm gonna go chop my dick off with the little thing that cuts papers. Yeah, he goes, do you have some sort of cleaver

lying around? If you, I will pay you, you don't make any, because you have a some sort of cleaver lying around if you um If I will pay you you don't make any money your piece of shit I'll pay you $25 to chop my dick and balls. He's like will you shoot my dick? Will you shoot my dick off? Like it's a what if he makes me tie a string to his dick like I'm pulling out a baby tooth Yeah, like how they do Yeah, so I'm the door but he's actually tricking you into just jerking him off because it doesn't come off So he's like just keep slamming just keep slamming that dude's a brilliant writer by the way. He's very funny sure Sorry, yeah, what's the movie called driving this crazy?

Very good. It's called uh I believe it's called the will and Harper will and Harper Will and Harper yeah very original name and They go across the country and like a Denny's waitress goes. What do you want sir? And they go hey? That's a woman and she goes. I'm sorry okay. Yeah, what do you want then they go and then and then the whole movie they're like Yeah, what do you want? And then they go, I can see that. And then the whole movie, they're like, unbelievable, it's just, I'm dead. I'm gonna kill myself.

There's actually an incredibly bizarre scene, I watched this like three hours ago, where they go to the Amarillo, Texas steakhouse, the big steakhouse where you get the, you know, Oh, the Big Tex. Yes. The 72 on steak. The 72 on steak.

30 minutes, you get it for free. So Will Ferrell decides to dress up as Sherlock Holmes for the thing sure everyone knows it's will ferrell Mm-hmm, and they're sitting in the middle and they're doing they're doing the fucking the the big steak if I can eat it in An hour I get it for free competition thing and and Harper Harper is sitting across from him and They're eating it and everyone's holding phones and they try to make it seem like there's this like there's this moment

Just because everyone's filming it that everyone's like kill yourself You trans bitch. No one's saying anything everyone's being very respectful. They're simply filming Will Ferrell, who pulled into Amarillo, Texas. Yeah. These people are in Amarillo, Texas, which, by the way, is a conico. It's if a city was run by a conico. It's where they reattached my finger, by the way,

when my finger got cut off. There you go. We lived in such a shithole that they're like, shit, this kid's going to lose his finger, fly him to Amarillo. Amarillo, Texas literally exists to eat steaks and to maybe put a finger back on a fucking drunk retard driving really fast through the state. And if it does, if you can't attach it, so it on the Harper.

And she's got a new penis. It's the most bizarre scene I've ever seen, dude. They're literally it's like Will Ferrell dressed as Sherlock Holmes, and he's eating his steak and drinking a beer and they they demand that this black guy Announces it they demand that he goes and remember that's a miss Harper steel steel and he goes we got Will Ferrell here and He goes and Harper Steel

Miss Miss Harper Steel and then then the camera cuts to harbor and They have they play music and they act like it's they do they it's the big triumphant moment of the movie They act like it's the most depressing thing in on earth and Then they just show will ferro drinking a beer eating a steak and Harper just keeps kind of looking off into the distance and there's all these people filming And they they act they they act like it's it's a like they're in a zombie apocalypse Nothing happened. You're will fail. You're eating a steak in a minute in the middle of a

Nothing dress like Sherlock nothing cities dressed like Sherlock Holmes They're all they can't believe you're there and they're all gonna film you and then it cuts to them driving the next day and will ferro Like starts breaking down crying in the car. Are you serious saying he didn't like protect? Harper that's so good. And I'm so, I'm so, I'm so, I feel so bad that he didn't. Is he dressed like Elf the whole time? No, they're both wearing just her rift, like Patagonia jackets the whole time and shit. And she looks like his grandmother.

Yeah, she, I mean, yeah. She does, unfortunately, look like Mrs. Doubtfire. She looks like she's trying to get her kids back. I mean, I'll pull up a picture. It's not great. But it was amazing watching it, because I'm like, nobody did anything, the whole movie, nobody's doing anything evil.

They were searching for outrage. They're trying, the whole movie's like, they go on a road trip, and Will Ferrell's like, God, I hope you get hate crime. I hope to God you get hate crime so this movie has a purpose. No one does anything. I was watching the trailer and I could only think about Will Ferrell, she comes out to him and him

Machiavellianly going like, well I gotta, I gotta drive you cross country and you get called a faggot dyke and then I make, I get to keep making the Minecraft movies. They were expecting. It seems sociopathic to me. Well, make, I get to keep making the Minecraft movies. It seems sociopathic to me. Well, no, the phone's not ringing for Will anymore. Yeah, Jack Black. Did you know that? Will Ferrell is planning to kill Jack Black in his home.

I was onto this motherfucker when he did this bullshit right here. Oh, this speech. Did you guys watch this? I think you showed this to me. Play it. I found this from January, so this is this is this is the most Shame on you, sir Shame on you. How dare you use Satanist? I'm on to you. You're one of them

Well, I don't care that I used to work at your company You look at me when I'm talking to you. Let me move Now your eyes are on me. I know. I'm sick of it. I'm on to you. You fucking Lipton.

No, but seriously, he's very, he's very cringe. And I'm sick of this. Yeah. This is a load of horseshit. When when I saw this what I'm about to show you guys This is the most tuck your penis and balls Like Buffalo Bill style behind your legs up your fucking ass and squeeze like this until you can feel both your testicles go pop pop He's trying to do this so hard. So he can be in like Jumanji 9 or some shit.

It sucks so bad. This is bad. You show this to me and I sincerely thought I hoped he raped a child and is trying to cover for it. So I can have at least a little respect for him. Not that he's just this big of a, I need you to like me fag. I was like, I hope he did horrible things. Here we go, here we go.

We'll listen to this cuck. Forget about the entertainment world. Isn't it just time? Isn't it just time for women to run the planet? Faggot. Okay, so now here's real quick. So what he's gonna do right here is a tell okay? We know this it's a classic thing in poker. I apply it to situations like this as well, and I invented it

I'm not just trying to play KU. I swear Right there. Yeah, that's the damning thing of it all. I'm not trying to play KU. That's what liars say I'm really not trying to lie. I'm not trying to placate you. That's what liars say. I'm really not trying to lie. I'm not lying to you. I'm telling you the truth. And then you go, I never said you were lying. And he goes, well, I'm not. Fuck you.

Why would I? I'm not trying to placate you. It's exactly what you're fucking doing. He goes, and I'm not trying to say this to get the new Jumanji movie. It's so funny, because he's just sitting by the phone like this. All day on the Holland Drive. He's in Amarillo, just sitting by the phone like this. Yeah

He's in Amarillo, Texas eating the steak dress the Sherlock Holmes and people are like Ricky Bobby and he's looking down like I'm so sorry He's looking down at his plate and he's looking up at this at you know, mm-hmm. This person looks like a ruffled parrot I'm so sorry Harper. I'm so sorry. Yeah, and Harper is like eating her steak But like looking around like acting like like they're about to be killed. Mm-hmm and nothing. It's like listen listen, sweetheart Listen sugar tits. How about we fuck? How about I talk to you how we talk to women If you want to be a woman so bad, how about that? Is that gonna make you feel equal? Yeah, would it make you feel equal if I corner you tonight, like the accused?

What if I do what I do to all women? Hey Harper, Harper, get out, why don't you go play that pinball machine? I'm gonna get behind you, I'm gonna make it really weird. Harper, Harper, would you wanna feel like a woman? What if I put my arm up so you couldn't pass, and then I didn't, I didn't technically rape you But you felt you couldn't say no and everyone's just filming cuz it's will fail in the middle of a nowhere

And I'm not kidding I shit you not Jason But then it it cuts to the next morning and they act like they were both raped. Yes, like it was the acute Oh, I totally and will ferrell starts crying in the car. He goes I've never felt more in my life like it was more like people looking at me at once You know and all the times where I felt like I was just out there alone I never felt more like that and and and harbors, you know driving of course, she's a fucking man So she drives well, and she's driving the whole trip and and it it's just like it was always my dream to work at Michael's that's why I look like this I want to help people with their scrapbooks and

the doc is actually fascinating because it goes to show no one gives a fuck that's the thing she's upset by the fact that it's actually not that big of a deal anymore and no one really fucking cares. It actually made, the- And the whole documentary's about like how it's upsetting to her because nobody fucking, it's not interesting. It's not interesting.

It makes straight people actually look pretty fucking good. Cause even the trailer, I watched the trailer, the one clip they could pull was this drunk, like fucking 19 year old with a fake ID Who goes what's up, bro? And then will fur goes not a bro. That's a woman. He goes. Oh, sorry, dude And then that guy immediately in the documentary goes It's so cool that he's that that will is out here like like like like, you know for you and going on this trip for you And that's awesome

Everyone's everyone's so cool and bothers them, the whole movie. And then it shows them, they drive like an hour, and then they set up their fucking shitty lawn chairs, and they look into the distance at the sun, and they go, they just pretend like there's some sort of, like there's some sort of, you know. Like Lewis and Clark. Yeah, like something's happening to them,

and nothing's happening to them. They're on the precipice of really significant change, man. The country doesn't give a fuck. Mm-mm, they don't care. Why don't you just hurry up and get home to Tim Meadows and Kristen Wiig and they can go sing their songs about you wherever the fuck the bit is here.

No one fucking cares, no one cares that you look like a rabid dog. Sorry. You decided to get rabid dog surgery. It looks like Wilfro found her in a box on the street in New York and picked her up and they're like, that's the run of the litter. It looks like when Scooby Doo's pretending to be a woman.

The whole movie, it's like, she actually doesn't look that bad for a man that's obviously pretending to be a woman, but it's like, do your hair. You look like, it's like, the whole movie could've been Will Ferrell on a road trip with Frances McDormand. Yeah, unfortunately. The same shit. Frances McDormand looks like shit, dude.

It's like, wash your hair, bitch. She really does look like, it's really, it's in your face how much she The same shit. Frances McDormand looks like shit, dude. It's like wash your hair, bitch. She really does look like, it's really, it's in your face how much she looks like shit. It's this whole thing, it's like nobody actually gives a shit, like you just have to actually care about being a real, are you gonna be, are you, do you wanna be a real woman? Or do you wanna look like a fuckin' scruffed up poodle?

Well, I've really empathized with trans people, and I would like to use the women's restroom. Spell's nice. So you can just shit all over it. I love whenever I would love to go in there and ruin it for them. Whenever I'm at a place. I would.

I would have to shit right in every sink and kind of line it between the sinks. I've been at a couple places late at night, Benjamin, and there's no women in the whole fucking I've been at a couple places late at night Benjamin and There's no women in in the whole fucking place. We're at yeah, I use the women's bathroom, and I go it's so nice It smells so much better. It's actually more disgusting in a weird way like there because it smells like pussy They're actually no. They're just grosser. They actually like are more bigger slobs and men mmm interesting Was there like just bloody pads all over the fucking place? There's just the smell and obviously they're not like

pissing everywhere because they put their ass on the seat and they do everything in there, but it's a sloppier bathroom. It's a sloppier bathroom. But this documentary's fascinating because you can watch it It's a sloppier bathroom. But it's just, this documentary's fascinating because you can watch it guys, everyone out there watch it. It's an hour and 45 minutes of them desperately

trying to have oppression and nothing is happening. Not a single thing is going on. Nobody gives a shit. In the most fucked up areas of the country, quote unquote. Yep, and there's multiple moments of Will Ferrell and her crying. And I'm being respectful, I'm calling him her. That's very good.

And there's literally nothing's going on. Nobody cares, everyone's like, cool, whatever. Dude, once you're infertile and you don't have eggs anymore and you're in your late 60s, it's like, I don't care what your gender is anymore. Shut the fuck up. No, no, no, you're just not a person anymore. It's watching Stephen King turn to Stephen Queen.

It's Stephen Queen's road trip. That's good. You gotta crust the asshole. No one really gives a shit anymore. So pack it up, and pfft, pfft, jog on. As the great Edgar Wright once wrote. You unfortunately transition too late to ever have a slight chance

of being kind of hot and fuckable. Basically the big moments in the movie are somebody goes like, what's up dude? And then Will Ferrell goes, that's a woman, that's, call her her. And then they're like,

alright, it's like a drunk guy. And it's me and Will Ferrell. He just goes, bleh, no it isn't. He's like, and they could easily, all right. It's like a drunk guy. And it's me and a blue feral. He just goes, bleh, no it isn't. He's like, and they could easily, they could easily go, what the fuck are you talking about? You ugly fuck.

But instead, they're just like, oh shit, yeah, whatever, man. Cool, that's the woman. There was a drunk right next to me like, this seems very opportunistic for you, Will. It seems like you're flailing in your business The movie is actually really great because it goes to show that Essentially the whole country doesn't give a fuck you could travel across the country with a fucking wet dog And everyone will call the dog a woman. Yeah, and it's actually really beautiful

And that's what I'm saying. It is kind of beautiful. Yeah, the wet dog is a woman You might as well correct people about the gender of your actual like dog yeah, you have with Jesus she and people okay Yeah, yeah, they go not a fucking it's a beagle. I thought it was a boy not a fucking guy She's got a pussy dude It's the same as if you bring your dog across the country never was oh what an old dog Oh, it's so nice. You go. She's got a pussy dude. It's the same as if you bring your dog across the country and everyone goes, oh, what an old dog. Oh, it's so nice. And you go, she's 12. Technically not old.

They're old, but they're 14. You get all in their face. You have some drunk guy. So here's how I'd like to see them. Who has a natty light tattoo. After I saw this thing right here, and by the way, let me finish this real quick. Yeah, sure.

And I'll tell you how I want the documentary to end I'm gonna start it over cuz it just pisses me off so much. Isn't it? Isn't it just time? Guys isn't about the entertainment world on the planet. This is about women running the planet. I'm not trying to placate you I'm not just trying to placate you, I swear. But I don't know what else to do because we, men, we've been running the show since what, 10,000 BC? Something like that. And we're not doing so good.

Okay, so right now, Please. In the background. Can you guys just take over now, please in the background, right now in the background, you hear the forks and the knives. They're cut. Everyone in the crowd is cutting into a baby. They're cutting into like placentas and they're eating it and everybody has big Satan antlers on and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Malloc is in the background. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They did the RSVP car that said Adrena crumb or baby.

Here is what I, yes very good Jason. Thank you baby. Here is what I would like to see. They go on a road trip, the moment they are out of the city limits of Los Angeles, they get hate crime. I mean the moment they get into like San Bernardino. They literally, they hit like the end of Pasadena

and the guy's like, fuck it! He drags him out of the car and fucking curb stomps both of the, dude he puts. They're in Sierra Madre and the guy's like turning into a clan member. A guy who looks like me, exactly the same without glasses, puts both of their jaws on the curb and then jumps up and lands on both of their heads.

I would love that. And then the camera pans out and you see there's a line of people with like clan Klan hoods, like from all different hate groups waiting to stomp. Yeah, yeah, Trump shows up and he goes, I'm gonna win again and it's great. Fuck these fags. That's so funny that they make it to like,

they make it to like Covina. They make it like West Covina, the gay crime. The fantasy that Will wants so bad that he's doing black like me in 1958. You fucking idiot. By the way, and I wanna present more evidence for Will Ferrell being, this is, they are trying to promote transgender surgeries

on children, I know what Holly was trying to do here. Is he really doing that, the children shit? Of course he is. That's the whole thing. he's so out of touch dude I know I've met trans people before I don't I didn't have anyone personally in my life. You gotta watch I will I will so this was Dude it makes me laugh every time it reveals just him. I know but he's just talking about trans people I don't know that she is there right? That's why I laugh

I know, but him just talking about trans people, I don't know that she is there. Right, that's why I laugh. And then, and then. Harper, formerly known as Angela. Well, watch, when it cuts her, watch how funny it is. I didn't have anyone personally in my life. So this was all, you know. And it kind of puts the whole thing in perspective,

like that is, that is insane. Yeah, it looks, it looks like a wild zebra. Yeah, yeah, no, it looks, it looks like Walter Mathau. I'm yeah. No, it looks like Walter Mathau. I'm gonna be honest. It's Walter Mathau doing a skit. Monty Python. Yes, exactly. Yes, yes, yes. The whole movie is basically like Will Ferrell being like, yeah, Fred Mertz is a woman now.

And you know what? Fred Mertz is very funny. You know what? Fuck her right now. Eat her pussy. She's got a new pussy lick it faggot. Fuck you. May I present to both of you evidence C of him being a Satanist. Okay. Here we go.

Right here. Satanist, Hollywood elite, Will Ferrell on the Chris Gether Show. Who is Captain Cuck himself? Look at his hair. Big Cuck. What I love is his hair. Is that Hans Kim in the back?

That's Hans Cam's dad. Who is that? You know what's funny? Hans has been around the block, man. I think he's blinking, but he might not be. You know what I love about Asian people is they have like welding masks for their eyes. So they can do like work with torches

and stuff on the world there. I love running into an Asian person and really not going, are you blind? I don't know how you are seeing fucking anything right now. Okay, so I want to present this to you. You might think it's just a simple, cute little alternative comedy sketch. Sure.

But wait, there's more at play here. This will break me down. It's not for the faint of heart. And you're gonna be my shaman and walk me through this thing. Your shaman, if you've got the guts to go there, remove the subject's clothes. Ooh. Yeah!

Not a good look. Not a great look. Yeah! So he's dressed up like the people he sees at his parties the idea is that he's like a marina and brava bitch chef And they're cooking Which can be accurately summed up as not yet a man, but not still a boy Like a pedophile exactly in the blood of a gist of turtle.

Thank you, Jess. Of course. This will make your show irresistible to viewers. It will be like one of those live NBC musicals that makes everyone lose. Also, can I say, Chris Gethered's such a faggot, he has a Morrissey tattoo on his arm. That's so gay. Oh, that is kind of gay. But that kind of is good, too.

Well, if you're a cholo 17 year old, that's cool. Yeah, he's a Latina woman. Yeah, if you're a 49 year old white guy whose wife futz black guys, it's not cool. But see, the two of you watching this with fresh eyes think, oh yeah, I'm just watching a horrible comedy sketch on a horrible alternative comedy show that stinks. Right.

No. What is the show? There's more than meets the eye. What is the show? There's more than meets the eye. What is the show? It's the Chris Gethard Show. Oh. It's a public access show that's really, really bad. Okay, interesting.

God damn minds. What do you see, Devin? This is very creepy. Describe to me what you see. I'm seeing some sort of Moloch fucking, like, you know. You're seeing Rachel. Look at him. Satanic rituals happening right now.

Yeah, they're rubbing blood on him. On true TV. A dirt person. It's not much of a metaphor here. This one is just pretty clear cut. Make him a dirt person. Hey, Chris, don't think twice. Pretty clear cut. Make him a dirt person. Hey Chris, don't think twice.

I'm just saying it's all right there out in the open. That's really creepy. I mean look at this shit dude. Holy shit. Is this what you, you're gonna take advice from this guy? He's willing to. This is amazing work, what is this? What show is this from? What episode?

What is this? How did I miss this? How did I miss this? This is insane. This is on True TV? Will Ferrell is playing? I'm fucking... You do need to send this to Alex Jones.

Oh, I should actually. What the fuck, dude? They're covered in blood. Yeah, they're covered in blood, yeah. It's... Unfortunately, we have a satanist in our midst, and this is a Christian show. Sure.

And we won't tolerate it. So Will Ferrell, I'm doing an official DVD and Blu-ray ban of all Will Ferrell films starting now. You're on God's notice will ferrell you're done Yeah, that's that's pretty creepy man that is pretty yeah, that's upsetting yeah Do you think that Asian guy thought he was at the actual he was there to just fuck the kid? He's like what is a stupid? Get he's like when do I get he's like I had my eyes closed the whole time

I should get the fuck the kid What is this? Oh Harry? Okay, Devon. What do you? This will be a quick quick seven Devon. What do you think about this people ask me David? How the hell do you run for so long and many people think I am just built different? But all I really do is just tape a stick to my head and hang a piece of fried chicken at the end So I never stopped running for it the fuck you staring at many people That's not real now Devin. What do you think about that? That is a

Fucking black. How does that make you feel like you've chases chicken around? How does that make me feel is that real will you Will you just show me? I think the quote is real. I think him cutting to Joe staring blankly ahead is edited it. Wait, you guys both, oh you guys are both like boomers. What? That was edited. That was AI?

It's clearly AI, yeah. Goggins is so retarded I would believe that. Why is that? That's not different from any fucking thing we would say. You can tell by the way the mouse moving. I hate David Goggins. So I'm like anything he says I'm like, yeah I've literally seen clips of Goggin going like I want a bunch of hard guys to like get in a room and be fucking

Hard together like and that was real like why? With the fried chicken thing be any different. What is this thing? You got fucking? Oh If you are a mood, I don't think we can watch this I was thinking we could save this for the Patreon. That's a Patreon, because we'll get Striked. But can I say? Ah! Look how mad that man is! He's so mad!

Can I say, him as Moodang is a better woman than a Harper. He's pulling it off more. Yeah, that is true, Jace. Great point. Thank you, Ben. Gene Smart is amazing. What is this, the floor? So another thing I wanted to show to you guys,

it's my new favorite game show. We're onto our next segment now. I wasn't meaning to play that David Goggins thing, but I thought it just might make Devon very upset, so I wanted to play it. No, you're doing a great job. Devon seems livid. This is, now Devon was much more upset

about the transgender documentary interestingly enough. I think it strikes a note close to home perhaps. Interesting, I guess he's more racist than he is transphobic. Cause he was totally fine with me playing that racist meme that some Pepe crafted. The David Goggins thing? Yeah.

I didn't know what that was, I thought it was real. You guys are so easily tricked. David Goggins is retarded to me didn't know what that was. I thought it was real. You guys are so easily tricked. David Goggins is retarded. I mean, I'll believe anything I see of him. When you saw Bowen Yang on SNL as Mudang, did you think that was actually Mudang? Who is Mudang, by the way? I don't know.

He's some fucking hippo. He's just context clues. Is it hippo? Yeah, who cares? Devin, you're being very glib. Mudang is a pick-me-hippo. So Bowen Yang is, he's, so So Bo Yang is pretending he's always doing an impression of a family member?

Moodang? Moodang is the newest member of the Costco family, the double chocolate cookie guy. He does this and eats chicken bags. It's the Rizzlers eating Moodang in a sandwich. He goes, he gets five booms. Boom, boom, boom. No, I would like to, can I show you guys

my new favorite game show? Yeah, go for it. Okay, it's called The Floor, I love it. I love it. I love it. Is that Gerard? It's hosted by Rob Lowe. Free. Skateboard by Rob Lowe. Frame.

Skateboard. Skateboard. Ah! Motorcycle. Motorcycle. What is this? Type 3. I swear to you it's real.

Helicopter. Helicopter. Are they looking at the side of the, what? I think they can see it. They're seeing it, yeah, yeah. They're just naming things? They see the images. They're naming things.

Yes, dude! Yes! Camel. This is how retarded we are! It rules! Tuk Tuk? What? Donkey. Camelback.

Barrel. Mountain climber. Pass. It was horse! I'm a girl. I'm a girl. I'm a girl. Mountain climber, pass. Team. Team. That was worse. That was worse. It's called horse. Boat.

They have nothing. They have nothing. Sailboat. Subway. Subway. Jet ski. Jet ski. Waiver.

Yacht. Yacht. Yacht. Ski lift. Ski lift. Gondola. Gondola. Gondola.

Jesus Christ. RV. RV. Then you do have to participate. It's lift. Ski lift. Gondola. Gondola. Jesus Christ. RV. RV. Then you do have to participate. It's boring. What is this? Why? It's my new favorite game show.

Are we so retarded? We're making like new game shows that's called colors. Yeah. Jet pack. And the new game show, Shakes. Raft. A snowmobile. Ski. Snowmobile, you dumb whore. You're a worthless whore.

It's a fucking snowmobile. You stupid bitch. Fuck you, bitch. Oh, you fucking burn in hell. Congratulations. Oh, Rob Lohosted? Yes. That one is.

Jace, can I get a fucking... Of course. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome.

That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome.

That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome.

That's awesome. That's awesome. That's awesome. They hold up a little girl, they go, DJ. They go, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, dude, we're so retarded. We're so fucking. They're getting stumped. Dude, I know. They're like, fuck me. That woman is blowing it.

Dude, they'll pull up a picture of a bowling ball, and both of them go, fuck, fuck ass. I don't know. They're like, big rock. Big rock with holes. Dude, they should make a show called Breathe, and then they go, all right, go! And then it's a guy going, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo, ooo.

And he just passed out, they go, fail! You failed. That's the most retarded thing I've ever seen. I'm assuming it's called The Floor, because that's where the level of intelligence you have. That's where the bar has reached the floor Yeah, it's on the floor. So what the goal is you just whoever names the most say I guess and then they have lesbians on the show that look like Kim Jong-un

And she doesn't know what I guess snowmobile is somehow But I wish um, you know, I'd fucking kick ass at this show if it was just I was sitting there and I'd be like Mongolian Japanese Vietnamese Cambodian Cambodian you're going That kind of that guy's from Guyana cynical right Pakistani Pakistani I go Habib be be

Fucking a toboga and they go. Yes I really hate some type of Jew and they go right correct. Yeah next one. They go. Yeah, it's just a rocket Some type of Jew. Yes Eritrea they're like, how are you this good? Did you like the guy who sorts chickens at the fucking factory? Jesus I can also guess people's weight too. They did that you'd be a good carnival barker. Yeah, I'd be really funny training for you You could be the guy who does everybody's weight and then anytime like it would be a five foot tall Tiny woman gets on you go. I don't know 300 pounds

She just develops just horrific eating. I have face blindness for like skinny people. Yeah, like I don't even they don't even exist to me I don't even register. They're alive at all. Yeah. Yeah. No a big. Like I don't even, they don't even exist to me. I don't even register they're alive at all. Yeah, yeah, no, a big fact I get is you just go kill yourself. That's my guess. Can I, and by the way, Devan, did you have anything else to say, because you were very upset and I apologize. I should have had a trigger warning.

Yeah, do you? No, kill them all. Yeah, they should all die. Line them up and shoot them in the head and then throw their fucking paralyzed uncle out of a window on his wheelchair Well, you're the pianist. Yeah, like the pianist. I hope I hope I hope anybody We just watched has a paralyzed family member that somebody can throw on a window

And they tell them to get up first to make fun of them try and stand up. Yeah, hey can they push him out? I hope you just see him pinwheel can they push him out? I hope. You're just seeing Pinwheel. And his head explode when he hits cobblestone. That's my last words. I'm a simple guy. I just hope they can do that.

I'm a simple guy. I want what they did to the Jews in the ghettos. But for retarts. I'm a simple man. Just I hope they could shove an old man out a window. There's somebody like I'm old fashioned. I hope they round him up. I'm an old fashioned guy.

Just kill them all. I'm an old fashioned guy. You're like, you know, it used to be such a better time. You're like, when? You're like, 1940, Germany. Great time. What is this fucking shit?

Oh, I was just gonna, Jason was talking about M4 Wars. I was just gonna, we can't play this very long, but this is his new segment. American Central North Chinese Communist Black Oldies. Yan Chong Ying Wong, Waxi, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Hsiung Hsiung, Chinese coming That's Alex Jones's voice

So yeah, he is I don't think I could play that it's a new character fentanyl the chai calm dragon That's be he's a beautiful man. Yeah, he's awesome Yeah, I think his brain should be studied like Einstein when he explodes from blood pressure one day. So I don't wanna just show you guys, you know, funny videos and stuff. I actually would also love to show you my beautiful dark twisted fantasy. Okay. This guy right here.

Robbie P2Blocks. And shout out to my faithful mod on the live streams every Wednesdays and Fridays on the Clips channel. Moist Turtleneck and fuck bud, but moist gave me the lead on this guy and He is It's the high quality shit. Now Jace I want you I want to I want you to tell me right now if it's gonna be too triggering for you to watch a guy eat at Fazzoli's

Because I know we had a lot of after church stuff at Fazzoli's. We did grow up, we were in such a shit hole that we're like, I love Italian food. And then we got Alfredo that had ranch just instead of dressing. It was so good. But we thought we were like, this is like Italy. This is amazing. I got fat as shit freshman year of college. One in the afternoon, drive through Italian food.

I go, I'm in a Volkswagen Passat at 2005, they slide a bowl of fettuccine Alfredo with a big thing of breadsticks through my window. I pull forward in the hot, there's no shade, there's no trees. I park, I lean my seat back and I eat my, I slurp my fettuccine out. I'm putting down 2,500 calories, I lean my seat back and I eat my I slurp my fettuccine out a hundred and ninety degrees out

2,500 calories I'm putting on 2,500 calories easy at one o'clock. I'm getting Did you finish it and then drink it drinking like it was ice cream soup at the end? It's still there's nothing. This was my relationship with Italian food and it's the way Italian food actually should be is fazoles I'm fucking sick of this horse shit. You go to places they bring out they go. Oh, it's the way Italian food actually should be is fazoles. I'm fucking sick of this horse shit. You go to places, they bring out, they go, oh it's the best, it's fucking mushroom butternut ravioli and they bring it out and there's six raviolis.

What the fuck is that? It's bullshit. Yeah, it's fucking bullshit. They bring out, bring me a stick of gum. Boy, how about that? Yeah. Thanks for the 180 calories of pasta. What am I supposed to do with this? Uh huh, uh huh.

You fucking French Italian asshole. Yeah! You nnnn. You fucking N word Europeans. That would make him really mad. You fuck, you Neapolitan! It's bullshit though. It is, it's fucking bullshit.

It's fucking bullshit. It is, I agree. Oh, do you want the glass of wine with your, no, I want a big thing of Pepsi! This isn't Italian food. If I go to Italy and I see a Fizzoli's, which I hope to God one day I can afford to go to Italy on a two week thing, I'm eating Fazzoli's every day.

And I'm telling people, I'm wearing Fazzoli's shirts. I'm walking around Rome. I'm walking through the hills of Italy in slides in a Fazzoli's shirt. I'm going up to the locals, they're 97 years old, they live in a blue zone, because they have the olive oil and the spirulina and all that. and I go,

hey, could you guys, I don't know if you guys speak English, could you point me to the nearest Fazzoli's? And if you guys don't know, a fucking dairy queen will do. Yeah, you're in basically like the scene in the 20 Minutes in Godfather when he's in Italy, and you walk up to the beautiful lady, you go, do they got a place where they put Pepsi in the lasagna, like really bake it in there.

Just so it gets real nice and sweet in the middle. And she go, you know you have bigger gay aritas. No, I don't know. Please. You fucking suck ass. You are, you suck ass. You're a big fucking arita. You're a big stupid arita.

I'm gonna get in this car and blow myself up. Because you fucking suck. Dude, also, Vazoliz is great, because they'll have a cheese lady come over and she'll be like, tell me when, and she's just putting credit cards into a thing and just grinding it, just putting microplastics all over your food.

No, she goes, she goes, say grunt when you're ready. And it's just, she's going for two minutes, her guy goes, ugh. She goes, all right, thank you. Thank you very much. Dude, it might as well be you pull through the drive-thru and they throw the spaghetti at you dude I'm going I'm going to Texas on October. I'm flying there on October 9th by the way October 10th come see me at the Vavita room

anyway tickets are somewhere and my thing and I'm I can't wait to go to two places roses cafe and I can't wait to go to two places, Rose's Cafe. And then I'm gonna go to Fazzoli's. Devin, unfortunately, knows none of, let me tell you right now, Devin, you would still be that little fat kid

if you had Fazzoli's and Rose's Cafe. Rose's Cafe, the tortilla factory. You would've never flew the coop. You could watch them make the tortillas in their little factory. At Rose's? At Rose's. And the clientele, they're bigans. So you can go, you can gawk,

because they got their head down. You have your head up, you can look at and stare and do whatever you want, and judge away. I might come just to go to, just to see these fucking Drive out! These animals. Come do stand up on the show. I might drive out.

Come have a ball. You guys could do a Will and Harper thing on the way. Yeah, we do Will and Harper. You guys could drive there. Everyone was really evil to Ben. They're like, who's his retard? They go, he is a retard, you're right, bro. I go, no, he's not trans, he's called Ben. Call him Ben.

They go, no, we wanna call him Benjamin. And they go, no, he just sucks, not trans. No, sorry. I'm Benjamin. And they go, no, he just sucks. Not trans. No, sorry. I would can. Would you allow me to show you my my new crown jewel? Sure. Yeah. May I?

Mukbang Mondays, Fasoli's three meat tortellini meal. Because we're not just one of those podcasts that talks about what's going on in the world. We're also we're getting in the muck. And by the way, I can't wait to do the Patreon. I've been learning a lot about Mandalay Bay and we're gonna really Had a peer where I got really obsessed with Mandalay Bay. So I think this is pretty good Oh, did you really I did just cuz nothing makes sense, but we'll say we'll save it for the patreon. All right. Yeah. Well Play the retard

Already, you know we in for a good one today Of course are those those are that's the type of like like dressing you get from Jack in the Box easy Did he is he Jack in the Box dressings on his on his? Is he using his Jack in the Box dressings on his Italian coat? He brings his own, yeah. He has a Batman utility belt for different sauces that he said. I also love that you can tell how fatty he is

just by the hand reaching into the frame. In the single frame. How Ray Charles would fuck women on the road, I can tell how fatty he is by feeling the wrist. So what's beautiful about this is he's trying the three meat tortellini meal and it looks like a photo. It looks like they printed a photo and cut it out with scissors and placed it over a bowl.

It doesn't look, it literally looks 3D, it looks 2D. It looks like they took a picture of diarrhea that had been thrown up, printed that out and then sprinkled pubes and cheese on top. And then you just scotch tape it to a bowl and serve it to them mm-hmm you know I can see the logo and all that but my goodness it's a hearty one but first let's say maybe we'll get a little prepared because no one was gonna get the finger fucking the crouton bag Then his hand his hand looks like the baby from dinosaurs

His hand looks like Jim Henson Studios made it Let's get that salad ready. What is that? So that is cheese God fuck you the way he peeled that dressing fuck you He's fucking coming a lot of you like a salad why does he sound like He's hard and he's jacking his shit. I hate him so much. I hope he I hope he dies in his sleep This is a great reveal he's calling black kids He looks like the whale when he teaches his classes

He's got the fucking mic hanging in front of his face. Oh, he fucking does. Oh, fuck. And he's, by the way, so. I hope he burns, real quick, I hope he burns in hell. Real quick. I hope he burns in real life and then goes to hell and keeps burning. I just hope he burns in hell. He's wearing a Deadpool shirt,

and underneath the Deadpool it says believe in yourself. I hope. And his stomach is poking out like this. I will vote for whatever candidate drone strikes this man. Where does he live? Where does his faggot live? I found out he lives in Fort, well maybe I shouldn't say actually.

No, give his address. What is his social security number? Yeah, where does he live? I have been known to stalk people that I, I've driven around people's neighborhoods that I follow online. Where does he live? Give me the state. Give me the state. Where does he live? He lives in Colorado. to stalk people that I've driven around people's neighborhoods that I follow online. They have like five followers. Give me the state.

Give me the state. Where does he live? He lives in Colorado. Colorado, everyone find him. Go! Find him. Yah! Find him, cut him up into little pieces.

No, he kicks ass, I love him. I do, I do love. He's so good. I do love us like the guy who's trying to kill Hannibal with all the pigs. We just open the gates like So I would love to show you guys a few key moments from this video sure So he really loves

Little messy he loves the salads as always how many of those mice you think he's accidentally God fuck that Wait wait for it wait for it wait wait Wait Good appetizer, you know, it's always a good start. With any meal here. Wait. Just wait.

And it's a perfect tan, you know. It couldn't possibly be improved. Couldn't possibly be improved. Michelin star. That's how good the fazoli's fake salad is. He's eating a salad. Stop fucking breathing in the mic. He's got a mic that goes fake.

That mic doubles as a CPAT machine. I hope I can join the weekend. OK, so what's hilarious is when he switches over to the tortellini, it gets me every time. OK. His, the way he loves the breadsticks, you know? Do we? Well, stop speaking for me, faggot.

You know, I want like this breadsticks now Fuck you, but we don't let the breadsticks be You know too much the star the show. Don't get away from your face. Get the camera. Wait now wait time for the main attraction as for solis You know limited time limited entries well it's because he's gonna die soon That's so funny. I've got a piss-buckle on my ass. He goes to the dock, he goes,

my one goes to live till the McRib comes back. I'm looking at your charts, you're a featured item. You're going away, you're seasonal probably. Can you get me to January 25th, the McRib comes back for two months. He calls it the McRib. Yeah, no, he gets, when nacho fries come back to Taco Bell, he gets a big old word in the sky like Batman.

It's just his fat faggot face in the clouds. God, that sucks ass, but. I hope this gets more, oh, I kinda feel bad. This one only has 300 views. Nah, nah, fuck him. He has as many subs as we do, so. So it's fine. And he calls it Muck muck bag muck bag

Monday by the way I want everyone to be nice don't be you know you actually don't so we can continue to do this stuff basically yeah just be nice and don't tell him right yeah I think there's like dead flies in that fucking tortellini meal yeah can you do the intro on it again to the tortellini meal. Can you do the dance crawling all over it? Yeah. Can you do the intro on it again to the tortellini meal? I need to see that. Oh, yeah. Isn't it isn't it just Keno? It's actually beautiful. It's cinema. Yeah.

And we love the breadsticks. They're 10 out of 10 for those as well. So but. You know, one of the breadsticks now, but we don't want the breadsticks be, you know, too much of the star, the show, the shine off his face. Yeah. Tom for the main attraction. As always, now introduce the, Now time for the main attraction Entrees

Start the fall season, you know, he was you know, like he was in that family restaurant They got too close and the mom like a kid away Dude, I want it. I want to say real quick about Robby P2. Sure. Is we could all really be more like him. You can kinda take his life's energy, regardless of his life, you can sort of vampirically. Take that energy.

Take that, put it within, in your own soul, upload that, and apply it to your everyday milieu. Apply to things that don't suck ass. Take Robbie Pitu's eyes, pop them in your head, and look at the world through them. Right, you're going to your kid's soccer game, it's about to start, and you go, time for the main attraction.

Everybody goes, you're a pedophile, get the fuck out of here. By the way, if you are, studies do show if you're thankful for your food and very conscious of your food, it has a different sort of effect in how you absorb it and how your body processes it and how you use the nutrients.

Oh, so he's all. If you like, sort of thank and you realize that the food is part of you, you start to develop like a better relationship with that as a different effect on you. He's like how the Inuits eat food. He thanks the tortellini for the life-giving force. that the food is part of you, you start to develop like a better relationship with it, it has a different effect on you. He's like how the Inuits eat food. He thanks the tortellini for the life-giving force.

I have, I have. It's beautiful actually, he's so happy. I have such a. He's so nice. I will say this, I have such a simultaneous disdain and love for this man at the same time. It's kind of almost like, it is perfect. I mean, the fact that you go to him and he's wearing the Deadpool 2. Believe in yourself shirt. Believe in yourself shirt.

And I know he went and saw Deadpool and Wolverine in an Alamo draft house where the waiter comes and he got two seats, one for him and one for the food. And I think that's disgusting and an indictment of every choice we've made since 1945 in this country, but I also think it's beautiful. This guy is single-handedly keeping soup plantation alive. I think they're like three or something. He's fighting for the last two to exit.

He's chaining himself to soup plantations, like climate person. He calls it leading the rebellion. He walks over to the buffet and he whips himself. He walks into soup plantation dressed like Calvin Candy and he goes, now where are the soup slaves? Where are these black gentlemen that bring soup to my mouth?

I mean, that looks like soup plantation decided to have like a tortellini night. Isn't it just beautiful? And he won't dig into it. Oh, he does. I mean, I'll show you him eating it. See, I didn't lie about the shirt. It says believe in yourself.

You did not. They're almost tortellini. shirt. It says believe in yourself. You did not. They're almost totally almost similar to ravioli. Why is his voice like that? In different, like more round shape. What are you doing? What is with you? What? It's like he's playing halo with his food 11.99 just for the entree

Is the price And of course an extra like four or five dollars for the sound within the drink. These guys are obsessed with the price of the bullshit. They show all together. Always obsessed with their always like three ninety nine for nine calories. Why don't you think about your health care costs?

Dude, it makes me sad too, because when we went to Fasoli's, sure. Man, we had it so good in like 2010, man. We had no idea what we had and what they could take from us, really. Do you know, remember at Fasoli's, for $1.50, you could add a huge slice of pepperoni

or cheese pizza on the side, and it was actually really good. Of course I remember. I think about it every day. You could get, the tortellini meals would be $6.99 easily. You add a pizza, you could add a salad and a drink, you're out of there for $10.50. Yeah, $10.50. That's where we went

because our dad would take us. He was paying cash. What is Fazoles? Fazoles is, it's like Olive Garden for people who are moments away from passing. That's what Fazoles is. Is that in Texas, Fazoles? It's in Texas. That's what Fazoli's is. Is that in Texas? It's in Texas.

They're in a lot of places. Actually, let me look up the nearest one because I would love to do a Bill and Harper style trip. I've never heard of Fazoli's. It's McDonald's for Italian food, is what Fazoli's is. Really? OK. And we used to go.

It's worse than, like, Cece's? Yes. It's worse than Cece's Pizza. Yes. Because it's not Pizza Devon, it's Italian food. It's peak than like Cece's? Yes. It's worse than Cece's pizza. Yes. Because it's not pizza, Devin, it's Italian food. It's peak Italian food. It's lasagna, it's chicken parmesan.

I have great news. There's one in Corona. I didn't know they made it this far west. Where's Corona? Can we go? We gotta go. It's 53 minutes from here right now with no... Well, fuck the Patreon app, let's just go. Let's go, let's go tonight.

Wait, wait, you think they're open? Fazoles? It sounds like they're. Hold on. Hold on. Siri, how late is Fazoles open? Kill yourself, Ben. Oh, so does that mean I turn on my location? Fazoles on Hanner Avenue in Norco

has already closed for the day. Shit. Cunt. She's such a fucking bitch and she never lets me do what I want. Fucking never lets us have fun, that piece of shit bitch. Fuck you. What kind of name is Siri by the way? She's a fucking bisexual retard.

Fuck her. Yeah, yeah, it's a hot porn star but they stole it. Look at this guy. He's literally wearing a Deadpool shirt. Look at him. Look at that guy. Look at that piece of shit. Isn't he beautiful?

Oh, can I show you guys? So this guy, by the way, I had hunger pains on the second day of doing my fast, and guys, this really, his channel got me through some really bad hunger pains. Cause I could, I just sort of vicariously lived through. By the way. Because you were so disgusted by food

you didn't want to eat. Can I, I haven't even showed you guys his intro by the way. His hair is worse than I thought it was. Yeah, I like him with the red hat. Why does he have such good hair though? He has good hair. But he has Andrew McCarthy's 1987 haircut, which is insane.

Damn, that is like such chemically induced hair. Can I show you guys his intro? That is like maltodextrin hair. Here's his intro. Okay. Messages, let's get started. I'm gonna go with the The intro should be the Universal logo, but it's just his fat body instead of the Earth. God damn it. Oreo with Coke in it? Just the way he says, hmm.

Dude, I love that he starts a video by going, hmm. Ben, I love, he starts a video by going, hmm. Like he's going underwater? He goes, hmm. Cause he knows he's about to have to talk for a minute. By the way, I'm just now realizing he sounds like Yoda a little bit. Yeah fat fat Cola with popping chairs see about I would love to try these Oreos He's got an Oreo flavored coca-cola-Cola and Coca-Cola flavored or yes getting back together

Yes All right that I dad actually blows my mind. Yes, it's great, dude, Robbie B2 And as always if you see my hashtag, that's actually brilliant that he's doing No, he's a genius And this one was done Inside out people like this should be murdered like Batman's parents. Let's take all these cookies apart by the way Yeah, Jack Napier should come out and shoot him in the belly. They should be slaughtered in an alleyway

Like the rats they are Like the rats they are They tried to make what is that? I hope you burn it Burn in hell then his mouth makes like Michael Winslow noises what he eats he eats like Stop like, stop doing that. Stop vanilla cream. What the fuck? He popped it. Stop. He keeps popping.

Cut it out. That's not bad. And then the original. No. Don't eat it. Don't eat the cookie. No. You fucking fat piece of shit.

Die. Listen for the pop. Listen for the pop. He did it. He did the pop for the pop Did the pop Not exactly you know tastes like Where it should be here I'm sound smart after the real They always try and go Breakdown They're the lowest moment on earth. They always try and go, interesting. Well, they always try and break down the lowest moment on earth.

They think they're like little Anthony Bourdain's breaking down a meal. They go, interesting. It's not quite as good as my own shit, but it's a little better than my cum. It's as if I should be shot in the head. It's as if I should be shot in the head. It's as if I should be shot in the head and then held up and used as an example of what not to do.

He's like, if you go to Fasoli's, you will instantly believe Henry Kissinger should shoot me a thousand times. I hate, I hate, I hate fat people. I hate fat people mm-hmm Fat people like this mm-hmm. I hate people. I hate fat people like enjoy it that it doesn't that it doesn't torture their mirror He's everyday existence I would love this guy of every other minute. He was like I don't know what I'm doing He breaks character. I don't know what I'm up. What am I? What is this? Why am I doing?

But instead Burn in hell, I know it's he's drinking Oreo coke. Yeah, that's right. Yes That's a thing and that's the star of the show and coke Oreos the main attraction And that's the star of the show and coke Oreos the main attraction Imagine drinking a full sugar Coca-Cola and you go, you know what not sweet enough But zero there's no calories he doesn't know that He's he doesn't know what calories are Just not anywhere. Yeah, of course, then you see the sure So heavy it doesn't go

Flavored coke I hope you stop general patterns old landmines A thousand Shit shut up fat faggot you fucking worthless piece of shit. That's the reason that everything's horrible You were just another Another reason why everything's horrible smells okay, uh-huh again zero sugar Just die I'm believable

The swish the swish like it's a wine so he what's interesting about robbie and I love this about him I've never seen this in another mukbang er. Okay. He gives himself backwash within his own mouth. So he lets, he drinks it and somehow comes up and you hear it wash back again. He's trying to swish out some, there's jerky in his teeth and stuff and he wants to have another meal. That's why I think he's so not used to not having

sandwiches go down with anything he drinks. No, he's trying to swish out other meals and he goes, oh, that's great. It's like, you know when you get a fast-food meal and you have like a coke afterwards. Yes. He's trying to do that in one swig Yeah, he goes. Oh, I could I could I could like wash out some of the meat Yeah in my in my teeth with this soda I mean you get that feeling he flosses and then takes everything that fells out He puts it in a hamburger bowl and then he eats that

and then takes everything that fells out and he puts it in a hamburger bowl. And then he eats that. Yeah, he's going down the line at Chipotle making his own burrito as food is falling out of his mouth. He's rolling it up. He's at the Chipotle line and they go, they go a burrito or bowl, he goes, mouth. And they go, why?

He goes, you heard me. My own mouth. Put it in my mouth. It is an impressive sound though because it's sort of like there's a high tide Within his own body to find out now You can listen to it. It's like there's a moon controlling. Yeah You're right he's been you're right

He's so fat that part of his body is closer to the moon than other parts of his body And it pulls on it more. I mean listen God damn you God damn you to hell See here the popping is driving me insane. Yeah, it's pretty pretty rough Usually I don't mind Coca-Cola sugar. That's the regular version. No. But by the way, I should let you guys know going into this.

He's tough, but he's fair. Yeah, sure. Because you guys know me, us we're fair. Let's just say, as much as I love the taste of a regular Oreo cookie, you know Bring the classic ones here This don't taste a thing like it Bottom line worst flavors ever

Bottom line worst flavors ever But to me that coke has done, you know much better It's much better flavors here even just a limited time Coca-Cola creations Once you like the starlight the move You get the moonlight of 88 you had starlight of 93. We all remember the classic moonbeam of 96. We remember the great Crystal Pepsi tragedy of 84. I thought I went down in a bunker and I just stayed there for three months.

The dream world. And all that here. This, however, is giving me like, it's like Coca-Cola tried to make it taste like chocolate. It's a chocolate cookie. It's completely lost on him, I know. But missed the mark. He's like upset, he's upset by it.

Yeah, he's very, no, he's- Well, like carbonated. He thinks this is one of, no, he's. More like carbonated chocolate. He thinks this is Coca-Cola really shitting the bed. He goes, it's my fault for expecting this much from the Coca-Cola company. It's so funny that Coca-Cola, you really fucked up again. You know, he walks in a convenience store, like it's the Criterion Closet.

And he goes, oh wow, this is great. Reese's Pieces. Some of their best work. And he puts it in the bag. Yeah. Fuck, that's so good. God, he's a magical man. He's a worthless piece.

You know what he is. Since Big Country, I haven't found a guy that I love this much. I think he's your John Coffee. I think he can almost heal you watching this man. Yeah. God, that's beautiful and disgusting. John Coffee Cake.

Very good. The pop, there's something about the popping noise because I know he's not meaning to make it. It's just his fat mouth. Well, the sounds are very important for me when I'm liking a guy. Sure. Big country, he's a warthog of types.

He really gets in there. It's like buying a house. You're like, does it dampen noise? Does it accentuate it? What can you hear through the hallways? It's me walking in a room going, doh, ray, me, check, check, one, two. I'm like, bit of an echo in here.

No, it's not giving it quite what I want. Yeah, it's just, there's not enough gurgling. I'm a gurgle guy. I need more farts. I need more farts and burps. And she's like, okay, last place we showed, you said too much farts and burps. So I'm a little, just a little confused

what we're looking for at this point. I feel like we're just kind of wasting each other's time maybe, Brooklyn's not for you. I got, listen I got one. We suggest Rumble maybe, you go to Rumble? Listen I got one last place in Greenpoint. Big fat faggot. Just farts all day.

Would you be down for that? A freak realtor. Yeah, yeah. A fat freak realtor. A fat freak realtor. She's like I got a real doozy. Real doozy on sex and part. She's like Romanian.

Yeah. She's like, by the way. I have big fat faggots. Right. There's a lot of fat guys in Chinatown, but you need to know a guy to get in. You need to know a Chinese guy. By the way, I will suck your dick to secure the deal.

By the way, I just use your dick to secure the deal. By the way, I'd use... I push him together. If you start watching this fat fuck, I'll fuck you. Please. Sold! I get 10% of all his ad revenue from what you watch. So I want to shout out Robbie P2 for helping me lose a lot of weight. No.

Staying in my fast. Burn in hell, faggot. No, Devon, he inspires people. Oh, right, yeah, no, he's great. He makes the world a better place. No, he's great, he's great. By the way, think of how much money he saved the American people by going out himself and laying on the grenade of featured items at fast food restaurants.

Robbie P. Two tries them so you don't go out there, waste your, not only waste your money, waste your time, your freshest time. Which is funny, you watch a 45 minute video and be like, I don't wanna waste my time to go to Taco Bell. I got places to sit, other places to sit. We're taking an hour and 15 minute review of the new Chalupa at Taco Bell.

I got places to sit, people to not see. Time is money, I can't be going out to Taco Bell three minutes from my house. Time is money and money is Gatorade, pal. So we can't be wasting time. You actually really depressed me because I never thought, I never in my life thought that people watched these to figure out where to eat.

And that really made me sad. Oh yeah, that's why it exists. That's why Will and Don are so popular because there's so many people like them that are like, remember that place Will and Don went to? We should try that, it looked good. Remember Don? And then when they're at the restaurant,

they go to the video, they're like, what did Don get again? They go, oh, Don get again? They go. Oh dawn got the Jello ribs. Yeah, those don't look good. It's incredibly tragic people out there It's it's so obvious Will and dawn like guide their life. Yeah, what what it dawn get? Mm-hmm Don ordered the pillow, right and they get they probably go to the restaurants and they go You I'll have what Don got. They'll go, who?

And they go, you know who. You know. You know. Where's their, do you have a signed autograph of them here? Where is it? I don't see it. Yeah, just a bummer is all. I didn't realize.

Their heads are taxidermied above the fucking fireplace. Mousetaping. They kill them and stuffed their heads. It's a mouth-scaping. Yeah, this is beautiful. It's very beautiful for you that you found the new retard. I always get happy when I see that you found the new one. Hey, man.

I call up my girlfriend. I go, great news, Ben found a new one. You know what's funny is like if you looked at the world as if it was like a sort of a museum, right? And there's this big hallway and at the beginning of the hall is like early man, like in the caves and at the end is like, you know, astronauts and stuff, right?

But then past that is actually this guy. Because that is where we went. We kept going from early man to the Industrial Revolution to space travel, but then for some reason, we went to this guy. This guy. Cowboy Mike, Deadpool shirt, fat as ever loving shit. It's drinking Coke Oreo.

Ben, it's the same as, you could do the same thing of a fish slowly evolving into a wolf and then down into that little retarded dog that shitty Hispanic moms have. It's the exact same thing. The little chihuahua. The little fucked up white dog that's got shit in it. Oh, gay guys have that too.

That gay guys and Hispanic moms have with shit in its eyes. The shitty white dog. Shitty white dog that's got shit in it. Oh, gay guys have that too. That gay guys and Hispanic moms have, with shit in its eyes. The shitty white dog. Shitty white dog, exactly. I have a theory on that, by the way. What? Because they always have stains right here, and I think gay guys that have those dogs,

they fuck the dog, and so it's always been, it's been crying. Ben, that's not a. That's its mascara. That's not a theory, that's a known thing. You don't know that? That's California. If you're a Hispanic woman, you turn 65,

a van pulls up and they hand you a shitty dog with a bunch of gunk in its eyes. And they go, you gotta pretend this is like your life, like this is the blood of your life. Like this is your pulse now. And they go, okay. They go, okay. Okay.

Do you know I've house sat for two gay couples? Yeah, God I know I was a different man then that's disgusting and this was way back in 2017 house that for gay couple. Yeah back when I lived in Eagle Rock. I house that for two gay couples They were very nice, but they both had oh, yeah, I remember this they both had the exact Same dog and the dog's name was I'm not gonna use their dog's name, but it was always like tofer mmm white dog Long the long white hair shitty eye gunk and then fucked up asshole shit all over it Yeah, and as soon as I met the dog, I was like they fucked that dog

That's common its eyes and it's crying and then they have monkey pox. They fucked the Dog is monkey pox. Monkey pox. That they got from the YMCA downtown. It has shit polyps. Yes. They fucked it in the ass so much. There's shit. And they'll give you directions.

They're like, hey, the dog, so it can't shit on its own, so you have to fuck it in the ass in order to get it to shit. That's the directions. And then they give you, from the vet, there's a prescription on it that says, fuck him twice a day. Yeah,'s reading the the notes they left and he goes so I gotta I gotta fuck you in the ass and the dogs like

Damn But yeah, I never fucked dog No, so you say That's why you never got so you call back But yeah, I never fucked a dog. No. So you say. No. So you called back to the homes. That's the one thing that giant Mexican ladies of the gay guys have in common is that shitty dog.

I don't know what that trope is. They love shitty old white dogs that suck ass. Gigantic old Mexican ladies love a piece of shit white dog. They're obsessed with piece of shit white dogs. It's, do you think they ever confuse it for like their cleaning products or something? Oh yeah, they think it's a Swiffer. It looks kind of like something they'd be like, they'd put on a stick and then,

I give it to you half a- You could put Fabuloso on a leash and give it to a Mexican lady and she wouldn't know the difference. She go, my sidewalk is so clean. Oh my gosh, you smell so good. Yeah, holding it in its inner lap, patting it. I know, it's not like a grape thing.

It's like a grapey thing. It's purple. It's a purple. I love purple. My pen is a purple last thing I want to leave with and I and a lot of people say this is heresy but like fuck Mother Mary by the way this whole session that everybody has mother Mary wait mother who's mother Mary Jesus Jesus' mom. Jesus' mom.

Fuck this bitch. Fuck her, man. Can I say, because everybody- Fuck her, man. It's the same shit, because Mexicans worship, and you go in their house, they have Mother Mary everywhere, and they say, she's like, she didn't do anything. That's why people go, what does Melinda Gates

have to think about this? Melinda Gates didn't invent Microsoft. You get her the fuck out of here. Yeah, that's a good point. With her flat tits and her dog face, she didn't do anything. Bill Gates sucked Satan's dick for 190 IQ so he could put chips in everybody.

I don't give a- Talk that shit! So, here's what Mother Mary did, ready? This is what Mother Mary did. Yeah. For an angel. An angel came down and she did this. Yeah, and then she's a whore Yeah, Mary's a huge whore and you know, she really fucked the shit out of that Angel like had to like hold on she's like, but yeah, I have no problem saying this because Catholics worship a man with a weird They worship a man. They don't worship a god. they worship a man. Mm-hmm and enough with these saints Worshiping men that were that fucked kids and stuff. You guys are yet Satan Satanist freak shit there

By the way, can I pull up another thing real quick? This has been pissing me off about Catholicism. Holy shit Holy fuck. This has been pissing me off about Catholicism. Holy shit! Holy fuck, this has been pissing me off. Play it, baby! You just play the movie Spotlight and we watch the whole thing. This guy, Bishop Williamson, was kicked out of the Catholic Church. By the way, you can do so much shit in the Catholic Church

and not get kicked out. Here's what this motherfucker did to get excommunicated from this bitch. Watch this. Okay, bitch, play it, baby. from this bitch. So you got... And they kicked him out? Excommunicated. By the way, how many of these guys fuck kids and they move them to another church? You know what I mean?

Yeah. It's disgusting. They probably told them like, listen we all want to talk shit about the Jews, just fuck the kids. Be happy with what you got, man. We don't believe in anything. We don't listen. Nothing.

This is all so we can dress like weird space aliens in the middle of the Vatican. It's just that Catholics, there's too much window dressing. Enough of the bullshit. There's so much window dressing that they're fucking kids behind the curtains. Get all that shit off, worship God and Jesus, enough with thinking like Mother Mary did anything at all.

Shut the fuck up, enough of it. Stop worshiping saints, stop it. Stop the chanting too. Enough of the fucking chanting. It's pissing me the fuck off. And I'm happy if it does something for you in your soul and all that stuff, but you gotta answer for the fact that your church kind of exists to fuck children.

And also, a lot. Like a lot. I know all churches fuck kids, but your church fucks the most. No, not maybe more than the temples. That's a fair point. Yeah, but there's no white people, there's not a single white Catholic

who actually believes anything about the Catholic. It is like a made up religion. No, a lot of people kind of fake love Catholicism now and it's like their personality. That's your retard. If you live in Brooklyn and you're Catholic now, you're a fucking retard. A bunch of hot girls go to mass

and they wear slutty black V-cut things and their hair's all fucking shitty, Yeah, like they go gothy stuff They go. I'm the most I've made all the choices. No one else is made and I'm still fuckable And by the way, it's very funny because these people are so like basic and gay that they return to the church That's the most like corporate version of Christianity. Yes, the most like it's like night the Nike religion At least if you're somebody in Brooklyn and you want to be cool, join the snake-holding church, like the Southern Baptist guys who hold snakes

and get bitten and then they die. That's what they got to return to. Those guys kick ass. Go all the way, if you're gonna, do the real thing, enough of this shit. Yes. Enough of this Catholic shit. Agreed.

Preaching king. We defeated the British, we cut that umbilical cord off from Europe. We don't have to deal with all the Catholics and all that history, fuck, nothing happened before 1776. New rule on Lemon Party, if you want to discuss something that happened before 1776, it didn't happen. I am 1776.

Nails. I am 1,776 pounds. I am 1776 pounds. I ate the Declaration of Independence. I'm Alex Bones. I leave bones from wings that I eat. I'm on the blazing wall of fame. I'm on the blazing wall of fame. I'm there with Jeffrey Epstein.

If you go to Quantico, they have a blazing hall of fame for all the people who resisted fucking all the kids, and I'm there. I didn't fuck the kids, they put me on the wall. Anyway. That's just something that's been bothering me a lot and I'm gonna receive a lot of heat for that but let Bishop Williamson, let this guy back in the church because I guarantee you this guy is so passionate

that there's no way this guy fucks kids That's all I'm saying I'm just trying to defend the right people in the world and that's why I read the news You're fully correct. I'll show you the history of it. In 1988, he was excommunicated from church. Pope reversed the decision in 09. And then someone SSPX, oh, that was another pope, expels him for his Holocaust denial. For a H-cost.

Well, I didn't know he denied the Holocaust. I thought he was just, uh. That was fun. I thought he was a comic. Right. Just doing a thing. I thought he was on a podcast. No, he had a lot of H-cost denial.

Yeah, you asked him to come on Lemon Party. Interesting. Well, they gotta let him back in, man. Wait, does this guy say, yeah, the Pope lifted the excommunication in 2009, though? Yeah, then they expelled him a few years later because he just kept denying the Holocaust. He got kicked out of the church twice.

That's very funny. I just found out about him. I'm like, man, he's awesome. That rules that the pope, there was a moment where the pope goes, this fucking guy again? Fuck! Yeah, what do you give him to do?

He's based. He's based. Yeah, apparently he's based. Too based to live. Too cringed to die. Yep. So anyway, I hope that doesn't upset a lot of people because everybody, their faith is very personal and I understand if you grew up with it, then you should stick with it

and it is healthy and good for people. I know some people Comedians that found the they they go to their Greek Orthodox now and they all they have a family now and they go to Catholic Church, it's very good. Yeah, Russell Bram. It's fair. Yeah, my good friend Russell brand Yeah, what I love dearly and we do transcendental meditation Yeah, they're leaves everything he says currently. No, everyone that's at the end of their rope is pretending to care about religion, no. Do you think Russell Brand, by the way, is the only guy who was less annoying on heroin than off?

Yeah, because he probably shut the fuck up for once. I'd rather him covered in his own shit. I have to step over him, walking into a wah-wah. I'd rather him be like really high on heroin because he won't rape me he's too tired yeah he's not raping me while doing his worded day sentences that he does to impress people his

worded oh right yeah he learns a new yeah he goes the exclusionary proprietary you know like type of shit it's like all right we get it you've memorized where we don't care nobody cares you know, like type of shit. It's like, all right, we got it. You've memorized where, we don't care. Nobody cares. Nobody gives a shit. You know what the Caduceus is.

Congrats. Fuck you. Shut the fuck up. Nice, I have Wikipedia too, asshole. Ass, asshole. Fuck you. But you're so cool, and you're so hot, and you're so rich.

You fucked Katy Perry's tits, and that actually is pretty cool. Yeah, that's so cool when I think about it. He got her titties in the prime. Prime. He drove the Ferrari off the lot. You know what I mean? He drove the Ferrari off the lot, 20 miles down the road,

got out while it was running. He broke up with her. Just stepped out of the door and just let it run down the street. He broke up with her right before her biggest show, right? Yeah. That's great. Yeah, she was like stepping on stage and then he called and said, we're done. And there's a clip of her like crying in a big like cupcake. Yeah. That's great. Yeah. She was like stepping on stage and then he called and said,

we're done. And there's a clip of her like crying in a big like cupcake before she's about to go like California game. And it's, it's from her documentary. It's shot like all like, I decided not to let him win that day. And then she walks out a big cupcake with like frosted titties and goes California game. And then she, a song and she goes backstage for a change, she's like, raaah! It's very funny.

All right, well, patreon.com slash Lemon Party. We did a little housekeeping up top, emotionally, for about 25 minutes, but we did a two hour episode, so I don't wanna hear any complaints from anybody and you don't If you don't like it just skip right past it skip skip to the 25 minute mark and then listen to it It's it's a and you got a nice hour and 35 minutes. Yes, sir When when we really took off? Yes, sir. Yes, sir patreon.com

I think there's still merch available lemon Lemon party. Yeah. Merch is still up. Those shirts will shrivel up. Those shirts will. We're starting to limit stuff that's really sold out. And our merch team is, I've emailed a lot of people, they're in the process of getting all the new printed shirts back and everything should ship out with hopefully within the next week or two is what they told me. So everything's in the process of getting mailed. Go and buy it if you haven't so you can get it shipped out before stuff runs out. And look out for my website here in about a month I think. I'm going to buy one of those jet pack things with the cameras where I can stream in 4K and I'll walk around Burger King

and talk to black people. Ben's going to get executed by the police live on cam, so you don't want to miss that. I'm... I'm... I'm... I'm... As I'm reviewing a whopper at Burger King.

Yeah, and they go, Ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha! And you go... They think it's a bomb, because they have a huge backpack on. Yeah, a huge backpack that you just walk in, and you go,

I want the cookie! The double chunk chocolate cookie! The double double chocolate cookie And they go, oh my god, oh my god call the police They I'm in Salmon South Central Burger King they call the police on me Yeah, they go. We got a crazy cracker looks like a scorpion out here. Got a Dylan Rufus mother It's a Dylan Rufus little gay bitch Kill his ass So patreon.com slash lemon party, I think we're gonna I haven't I

Want to do Mandalay Bay? I really do. I'd love to do it, but they the windows they don't open What do you mean the windows very good Oh very good We're gonna get to the bottom of it Devon very good very good very good Okay, let's go over. We're at the two-hour mark right now. Wow holy cow What an eight way to end it we love we love you guys Jase. I love you. I love you. You love me I love say it. Yeah, I love you say it No, we all love each other and we're very happy. Devin, and you can be honest with both.

I love you both. You can be honest with us, how much you love us. I love you guys with all of my heart. Very good. And listen, you don't even look at me, why are you looking at him? We already said it. We said it already.

Yeah, but it was a little fake. Look at your brother again. I told him I love him. You're looking at me while you say it. Well, that's because I'm having little fake. Look at your brother again. I told him I love him. You're looking at me while you say it. Well that's because I'm having to become, you're looking at me while you say it. No, you're making me defensive. I know and I should.

I'm being gaslit. I'm the fuck, I'm keeping this show alive. Pfft. This is sick. I'm being fucking gaslit. You're a crazy maniac. You turned me into Joey. You're a scumbag, buddy. You're a scumbag.

Look at ya. No, we're completely perfect. I love you with all my heart. I love you with all my heart. Same, buddy. I love everybody. I love the whole show. I...

What'd you say? I wasn't listening. Are you back to the old days? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I've seen some texts that people have been, you know, from you and T. That's so funny! The idea that they all think it's real too, I saw. Oh, that's so good. I heard Ben texted T. Ah!

Ah! I saw that. And that's the episode. That's all folks. Out in the west Texas town of El Paso I fell in love with a Mexican girl. Nighttime would find me in roses cantina Music would play and Polita would whirl Blacker than night were the eyes of Polita Wicked and evil while casting a spell I love Oz deep for this Mexican mate I was in love but in vain I could tell One night a wild young cowboy came in Wild as the West Texas wind