lemonparty - 125: The Third Pipe

Episode Date: March 18, 2025

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A immersive type feel to it my face. Talking, listening. Girl, I had the best of reasons. A immersive type feel to it, to be honest. I love Dead Space. I even, when I take pictures, I was at Death Valley taking pictures of Kelly, I'm like here, mounting over here, like I like that a lot better than just a normal framed picture.

Let it fill in. Let it fill in, yeah. Hey, look at that. Whoa. Hey. Oh my God. Look at that. Holy shit. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Ah man, you really love your daughter. Gotta keep sewing for her. Yep. Can't stop, won't stop. We need to put a do it for her sign, like Homer Simpson, but with all your soy faces. Well, isn't there something here about women? Yeah, women's rights.

Yeah, exactly. I keep seeing people act like we're idiots and we got kicked off YouTube because of the banner. And I'm like, but it. The banner's woke. Why would we get kicked off for that? The banner is literally a woke banner. If we're such assholes.

Is YouTube, does YouTube, like even YouTube, is is YouTube does YouTube like even YouTube is like that's gay Yeah, we all know that's gay now, and you're fucking with yeah, they're like this blue guy. He's too lib. We're kicking you off the show Testing check one that's better check check one two Okay, you guys wanna talk about Michelle Obama She her podcast yeah, we can talk about Michelle Obama? She her podcast? Yeah, we can talk about that. Michelle Obama is a podcast? I don't want to, but.

Yeah, I saw she's doing a podcast with her sister. Wait, is her sister the bald guy or is that a guy? Yeah, it's a guy. It was a, yeah. Well, her, wait, who is that? Her brother. Oh shit, dude, I thought for a second it was like an Aunt Madea thing when I saw her brother. It does look, it's, the, wait, who is that? Her brother. Oh shit, dude, I thought for a second it was like an Aunt Medea thing when I saw her brother.

It does look, it's, yeah, when I saw it I go, is this, is this like racist AI or something? Yeah, what does her brother look like? I haven't seen the show. Oh dude, I'll show you this. What's the name of the show? Her brother looks like Tom Hanks. It's called Guys We Fuck.

Tom Hanks visits him in a cell every night. He's spitting out flies. Guys we fuck. Tom Hanks visits him in a cell every night. He's spitting out flies. Yeah, he does, yeah. So just look at this, hold on right here. Yeah. Look at this shit right here. He, can I say he looks like Magic Johnson's son died and they found him later.

Yes, it's like they pulled the dress off of Magic Johnson's kid. Dude, he looks like a human guppy. Yeah, that's they look like they look like shit man. Yeah, that's crazy Well, you know Jesus it's stressful to live as she looks like she just got pulled out of a shipwreck She looks like she's sopping wet She's bone dry She think Obama pipes her do you you think he actually pipes her? They're breaking up.

They're completely separated. No, we don't know that, Devin. That's 100% true. They're breaking up. Let me see if she's got some sexy sex, sexy sex to her, hold on, when she talks. Have you seen the pictures Obama's been posting of her? We're so thrilled that

Hold on, I just want to give you a sexy face. they need to rest and recover when sick should be a right, not a privilege, and I love that. Theraflu's right to rest and recover when six should be a right, not a privilege. And I love that. Theraflu's right to rest and recover campaign was created to help. Dude, I feel like I'm getting fired at a job. Like, look, these two people have told me

into some side office and they're like, we found the tweets from 12 years ago. We're in the white sunken place. Yeah, the risen place. That sucks. I legitimately thought, just went to a random part of their show. And I thought, did Michelle Obama get cancer?

I'm not doing a joke, I thought she had cancer. And that's what she was like. The craziest part about this to me was that you always forget, you're like, oh, there's a guy out there that's been Michelle Obama's brother. For, yeah, 50 years. Yeah, who's just been living, like.

Who's at a bar and he's like, oh, Michelle Obama's actually my sister. And he goes, oh, is she a man? Right. Yeah. He's like, yeah, she is, don't tell anybody. But what's funny is she kind of looks more manly than him and he kind of looks like the lesbian.

He looks gay. Yeah. Doesn't he look like a woman to you? He does. He looks like a stud. Yeah. He does. I mean, I'll cut to it again.

I mean, I'm not doing a bit. He looks like a woman to me. Yeah. Do you see like there's like kind of like a tits thing going on and like a flappy arms thing? He's got a feminine vibe. No, he looks like he was in Paris is Burning in 1984 and he's aged out of drag into this. He's an old queen. An old flaming queen.

That's a guy that's backstage at a drag show, took off the wig, took off the dress after you know put the children's books away that they were reading. Sure. That is a- Saved all the baby penises that he collected from the frag brunch. And the pacifiers, and the rattles and everything. Right. That is a,

that is a, that is a get, that is a drag queen. Yeah. Right there. Michelle, She looks like a drag king. She doesn't really carry herself like she's getting piped down. Her muscles are loose in her back, she's hunched over. She looks like she's a pussy dry.

If she does have a pussy, which I guess Jerry's still out, I'm not sure, but if Big Mike has a pussy. Big Mike's pussy. She looks like she has a lot of really intense, quick sex with doorknobs before she walks into rooms. She rubs it on. She looks like Cate Blanchett in the movie where she's really stressed out in the third act

and just sweaty and has really weird sex with a corner of a wall. She's tar shoving a doorknob up her pussy. Exactly. Getting it all wet and fucked up. She is tar, Jace. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah, getting it all wet and fucked up. She is Tar, Jace. Yeah. Oh.

Oh, very good. Yeah, very good. She's Tar. Because she's black. Yeah, very good. Yep. Yeah. But yeah, it's a bizarre combo.

I'll say I'd kill myself if everybody was saying, you know, if I was a woman, everyone said I had a penis. Yeah. That way I'd kill, if there were pictures of me looking horrible. I'd kill myself probably somebody was sure She's not carrying herself. You know she's not too. She's going to therapy for this shit probably She never wanted to be a first lady either. She was like actively encouraging like most women

She was reading for her husband to fail and trying to hold him back in life. Yeah, right Yeah, she was not into it at all. Oh, she's not a ride or die bitch? No, no, she was actually like really mad at Barack. No, she's a jealous man. Yeah. Oh man, she might be a gay guy. And have you... She's a gay man. I don't know.

Dude, maybe she does have a penis. Am I falling for this hook line in secret right now, or is she actually a guy? I know, it's very not based to consider her a woman and on any level. So we're being cucks by not calling her Big Mike. I guess, but also all the evidence kind of points towards she's a guy. I guess it does, but I think also a lot of people

are just like, an athletic black woman that's ugly must, has to be a man because I hate black people. And women. And women. So we're in that mode too of life. You have to consider that as well. That's valid. True, true.

True, true. And I've been at family dinners and I go, no, but I think she's just an ugly black woman that's athletic and we're all. No, she looks like shit. For the last eight years, we literally casually consider her a gigantic man called Big Mike. Yeah, because she's got bad genetics

and then the way she's carried herself through life has made it worse over time. Because she's ugly and tall and looks like she gets in a lot of arguments with Tom Tibbadoe. Well, I will say the, who's that Nancy lady? Nancy Mace. Nancy Grace. That lady is obsessed. She looks like she's MTF to me.

But her whole thing was she was like raped, so no one can ever say anything. Break it down, dude. I didn't know she was a rape victim. I don't know much about it. Is that why she got big bolt on tits, because she got raped? Dude, I wanted to show her tits on the,

I think she's going to have a psychotic episode to show her tits. They're not good, dude. I know, but I want to see her fucked up nipples. You can tell they look like that kind of skeleton with two balloons shoved under the skin. It makes you really sad to see the skin where it hits the bone.

Yeah. The gap of air where the implant goes to bone. I don't know anything about her, really. I remember seeing her in Congress or something like that, and she had this big righteous moment of talking about how I was raped and so fuck trannies or something like that. And then she was on Bill Maher and did well on Maher and people were like, woo, yeah.

Did she get raped by a tranny? I'm not sure her story. This is the bitch right here. Yeah, that's trans. That's 100% trans. Because she was clapping back at this trans person. She's obsessed with trans people and shit. Or it's like whatever, it's just what they do.

It's whatever gives a shit. Yeah. And then this is her. I mean, she is talking a lot of shit for a vote. None of us have this manly of features in this room, by the way. No. The jaw, the forehead.

I would kill for that face, to be honest with you. And she would kill for your face. Exactly. So we should switch. I do wanna, I'd put it in no condom though. Oh yeah. I put it in no condom and then when I was coming I'd freak out and punch her in the face.

The minute I had post-nocularity, I'd chop her head off with a big, with the fucking scar face chainsaw. I'd chain her up in the shower, just saw her fucking head off. I kinda wanna test Jase right now to see if he would or not. Jase, if you don't mind,

I'm gonna pull up another broad, but I'm gonna test your... By the way, you ever think like the simulation we're in in her name is like Nancy Mays. She was like raped Right women carry mace to protect the game. It's like Everything's so bizarre. Okay. This is the chick. This is the chick. She's the Israeli Like housewife influencer lady. I know is really I gotta tell you you're already starting on I will fuck her based on what her tits Are gonna their high shit? Yeah, they have great bodies. They always have the wackiest names I know Israeli I gotta tell you you're already starting on I will fuck her based on what her tits are gonna They're high shit. Yeah, they have great bodies. They always have the wackiest names. Her name is I know Alzheimer's

This is her all our videos. This is titled no electricity for Gaza and it's like a peace sign, right? So she's a really catty bitch about sure aside. Yeah, she's a catty genocide empathizer lady, right? And she lives in Tel Aviv, so here you go. Don't understand what's happening here in the Middle East. Don't get involved! For him, us not supplying Gaza electricity is wrong. Because for him, we are holding Gaza in the throat. You know, she talks like that. She's from Miami Beach.

She moved to Israel when she was 42 and started going like, If you do not live here, do not comment on that country. I have to tell you, unfortunately, I already would, 100% would. I would fuck her and then I would burn her with white phosphorus afterwards. Devin, you as well? Would I fuck her?

This lady? Oh yeah, yeah, I'd fuck her hard. She sucks though. I don't think I can with her. Do you know the amount of women I fucked that sucked? It's, I don't think I can with her. No, but it would be better if she sucks ass. Do you know the amount of women I fucked that sucked? It's most of the women I had sex with. I would fucking.

Yeah. I don't think you've seen enough of this one. I would put ricin on the tip of my cock and mouth fuck her to death. Look at her, she sucks ass. She sucks so much, she probably wants you to wear edible babies when you fuck her. Oh, like wait for this parody, Devin.

She thinks she's funny. Wake up in the morning feeling like G hottest. I'm gonna hit the mole under me or starving Israelis. I'm gonna be the first. So like, that's the kind of stuff she does. Yeah, that makes me wanna fuck her a little less just because it's not funny, but I still would. All right, well I didn't know.

I'd run up to her and I'd throw a sticky bomb on her pussy I was kind of thinking like what would I do to this woman? Oh, I break in like Fargo, and there'd be she'd like be she'd fly down the stairs like like like Draped in the shower curtain There'd be like a month on end of her just running around like a chicken with her head cut off in the snow Trying to escape me and my friends would just be laughing we'd eat like microw month on end of her just running around like a chicken with her head cut off in the snow Trying to escape me and my friends would just be laughing. We'd eat like microwavable meals around her. Yeah fuck her a lot Against your will against your will Al Jazeera would be blaring constantly in this like shitty cabin we're in yeah, and then eventually one day

You're kind of too hungover She makes an October 7th reference and you're like, well, that's it. I'm gonna I'm gonna bash her head and then turn her into slushy is really women like this this type of annoying The smug. Yeah, I really Thought about it today. I want to dump a box of tarantulas on her head Yeah I want to tie her down and pour scorpions or spiders on her. She'd start eating them because she's evil. She's from the devil. She literally works for the devil from hell.

Every video she goes, oh, do we turn off the water and power for all the babies in Palestine? Oh, why you cry about it more, you woke-lipped tarts? She's talking about how impressed she is in Tel Aviv, and she lives in a very nice place. You can't hear a single bomb. Her first name is Natalie Myers,

and she's going by Gigi-Buk Muhammad, whatever. She changed her name to Av-en-ni, like, Avheimers. Yeah, no, they changed her name to, like, they just pick, like, they're like a guy on the run trying to create a fake name. They're like, my name is Cel chase. They're like a guy on the run trying to create a fake name They're like my name is Celsius Mike cable They just like make shit up You still would though

100% he's very objectively hot that's the problem with this really swimming. They're the only women in the world I don't know why they all have like 20 inch waist and like triple D cup tits So 100% I've seen videos where tits aren't this big, though. If you can find those, it might sway my opinion. I'd like to. I actually worked with a woman who looks very similar to this at the job where I got they gave everybody long covered and killed a bunch of coworkers. And she was very hot, extremely Republican, had a picture.

Her screensaver on her computer was like an eagle holding a gun like AI drawing She was like one of those okay. Look at that look at that look at that bird Look at that high weird forehead. Yeah, the makeup's all off. She looks like a man. Mm-hmm. She really does You know what I do? I'd make her feel really I'd get really really hammered and then and And then try to fuck and then I'd like like, we'll fuck, and she's like into it, and I can't get hard the whole time, and I'm just like jacking off my flaccid dick with her. I'm like, it's not you, just because they hate you, just keep going, it's not, I swear to God, it's not you.

You're gorgeous, it's not you, it's not you. You play psychological warfare. Yeah, exactly. You're like, it's not you, I have a chronic masturbation problem. It's not you. It's not you, I've death gripped my penis for nine years. It doesn't work anymore.

All right, man, well. Yeah, I wouldn't know you guys are on the wrong side of history. What, being straight and having sex with women with nice titties? Hey guys, it's everybody's favorite sponsor, Ruby's Flowers here. As usual, they've asked us to play a little message

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Well, Jason, you don't have to. Oh yeah, we're not on YouTube anymore. We're not on YouTube. It's fucking weed, you smoke the shit out of it and it gets you fucking high. That's phantom tax, bro. It gets you phantom tax, no cap, Riz high. It gets you high. In Ohio.

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Dude, you know what's funny is I still think the thing that I've been the most horny for in my life, which is an embarrassing omission. Sure. Like what is the most horny you've ever, the most horny moment I can remember is the lady with the swastika tattoo in American History X getting fucked.

Okay. Wow, that's an interesting reveal. Yeah, it's really weird, right? Why did that make you horny? That made you the horniest you've ever been. I still. It's like, aw man, when I saw that picture of that girl with the Kobe jersey on.

Mm-hmm. Hey, you know, Ben's actually covering for, Ben's actually covering for the real horniest moment was when he saw Elliot Gould get called the K-word at the dinner table. Yeah, the curb stomp scene, you rock hard. Yeah, that too. Yeah.

Ethan Supply in the van singing. The white man marches off. You saw the curb stomp scene and you're like, I used Timberlands against black people. That's ironic and I like it. I love it. I love it. This is cinema.

Yeah. Sorry baby. This is criterion. You watch Edward Norton 360 tomahawk dunk so fakily in the movie. He dunks like how Ernest plays basketball in that fucking, that movie. That movie is kind of like white propaganda.

Like he does kick a little too much ass. He kicks a massive amount of ass. And he actually, when he gets woke because he gets raped. So he's gay and woke now. Oh shit, he does become woke. He's racist, he's fucking meth heads, he's curb stomping people, he's 360 dunking. He gets raped, goes gay, and now he's like woke and.

Yeah, I don't get why we're invested in that character then. If, like, cause he doesn't do anything to like change, he just gets raped into becoming a different person. He's not racist anymore. He starts like enjoying his black friend that he like folds like laundry with. The guy at the laundromat. And then we're like, oh, see, he's like,

so he's already better than the black guy. Yeah, but there are, yeah. Wow. Wow, okay. So whites still win at the end of that movie. Yeah, but there are, yeah. Wow, wow, okay. So whites still win at the end of that movie. It was up to him to change. Exactly. Everyone else around him, regardless, is always wrong.

And he needed, yeah, he needed one black guy with a goatee to be like, when are you gonna learn that everything in your life is your own damn fault? Man, you don't like Magic Johnson? Man, you can become friends with me, a black stereotype. I got a cigarette in my ear, shit. How does that movie, I forget how that movie ends.

I always had a crush on that lady, the lady, Vicki Valencourt. Debbie Mazar? Yeah, but I don't know if this was the lady that was, so I've never let myself watch the movie again because I feel like it's a dangerous road for me to go down. Because I could also see myself being like, he is so cool.

You'd start booking tattoo appointments, get the razor out. I don't wanna have like a, like the way an 18 year old gets obsessed with Fight Club and Tyler Durden, I don't wanna have that with Edward Norman in American History. You're going his name is Adolf Hitler.

His name was Adolf Hitler. I can't, isn't he fucking a lady with a swastika on her back at some point? It's the Vicky Valencourt He's fucking her because she's also in a neonaut. Hold on. Let's we got a cut away from this real quick girlfriend sex Yeah Yes, he looks she's grander teeth she's got the short black hair. Oh, yeah. Yeah, there you go. Oh, yeah, but no, but this is the Yeah, that's what I was looking for right there. Yeah.

Do you remember one time... He's really character acting there, huh? He's really into it. He didn't know the cameras were on that day. Yeah, there was just a fan who wandered on his sack. I don't know if you remember this, when I was living with you and Katie for those couple years, I think I made Katie really mad one day because Gracie, her dog, ate a bunch of my food. And so I Photoshopped Gracie getting curb stomped

into that scene and I sent it to Katie and she just didn't respond to me. I think it upset her a little bit. Is this the scene that got you rock hard, Ben? Yeah, him getting raped. I'll have to take it off. Nah, let the chatterbait ad play. Hold on.

Hold on. So this is, can we play this on Patreon, by the way, or no? Because it's not porn, it's just from a movie. I haven't cut away to it yet. I don't remember if it shows any cock, maybe like what's watching and see if it shows cock or not. OK, for anybody who's wondering what we're watching right now,

it's the gay rape scene from American history. From American history sex. Where the Nazi gets what he deserves. By the rape scene from American history. History sex. Where the Nazi gets what he deserves. By the Aryan, yeah, there's cock. There's cock right there. Okay, so we can't cut to the cuffs. Lot of cock. But maybe we'll find a nice frame

of him getting fucked in his ass. Yeah. Wait, can I play the audio though? Yeah, of course. Sure, yeah, there you go. Hey, you guys can listen to the rape, how about that? Yeah. The theater of the mind. Where it's way hotter.

Yeah, way hotter. Here they come. So the Aryan brotherhood walks in, he's getting all wet. So why is the Aryan brotherhood gonna rape him? I don't remember this plot. Just what I ordered. Dude, they're holding his ass down.

Yeah. They're holding his ass down to fuck. And they're all smiling at his ass. And they're like, you're a faggot. And then they fuck him and cum in his ass down to fuck. And they're all smiling at his ass. And they're like, you're a faggot. And then they fuck him and cum in his ass. And they cum in his ass to show what a faggot he is. Do you think I could cut to this still right here? Yeah, show this real quick.

Show the still. The guy's face right there. Look at his face. His ass. Just those two eyes and a smile. Look at his fuck his ass. That guy popping up like Stephen King's it out of his dick. That's what they're saying.

They're saying you're the faggot now. You're going to get fucked in the ass. I think, if I'm not wrong, isn't that he wants to join the Aryan Brotherhood in prison, but they're like, you got to like fuck all of us. And he's like, nah. No, no, no. They want him. I thought that was the reason.

No, it's because he's like,'s like he like says like hey like relax around It's something along those lines Yeah, like they have make him like you have to fuck us to be in it's he says something like he's staying He kind of becomes like a lib. Yeah for lack. You know He just goes like hey, maybe you'll have motion and have all the Yeah, it's something along those lines You guys like oh twice what do you guys not feel like a weird? Sexual thing with like a swastika and stuff like the idea of like a big powerful like it's like a it's like a powerful Evil sex thing. Did you guys see Kanye's new studio that he has big giant red swastikas on the wall?

Yeah, there's something about like that. It's I don't know, it feels like there's like a, it's fucking. The Nazi symbols, it's fucking. You know what I mean? It's fucking, it's rock hard cops. When you look at a Swastika, do you imagine it as six dicks just crisscrossed all over each other?

Yeah, yep. And that's what makes you volume? The badge is red, so it's phallic. Okay. And then the symbol itself is very evil and grand and stuff. it's phallic. Okay. And then the symbol itself is very evil and grand and stuff. Red is phallic, that's why people wear red ties to command power.

I have a tibia. Because you're thinking of the penis, you're thinking of blood, you're thinking of an erection. I am at least, every time I see a red tie. Hey, I get it. That's why I voted for him. Listen, I will. I'm thinking about penises in my mouth.

I will. I'm just realizing you're a psychosexual maniac, but I will reach a hand across the aisle here. Red wave, brother. I have fucked a lot of Jewish women living in LA. You have. Because, once again, the big titty. I go to the Jewish women. Oh yeah.

And I have, in the moments of- Fuck them for that. I wish they had nothing. And we- In moments of having sex with them, I sometimes have thought about their family being very disappointed that I, a giant, Aryan, German guy, am fucking the shit out of them.

And that has gotten me a little hard. Yeah, maybe it's there you go. Okay, so Jace's omission. Devin, any sort of weird thing about this? Say the sexual shit? Do you have any sort of bizarre relationship to the symbol of the swastika or Nazis? No, I don't. No, I don't.

No, I don't. It's very harsh looking to me. What do you think of this band? Who's woke now, guys? Do you like this Nazi's ass? Because look, even his ass. Doesn't that look tremendous? His ass is lubed up and juicy right there.

It looks great. It looks tremendous. It's a great romp. Yeah. I don't like- I might dig in myself. I don't like how shiny they made the ass I think they added extra gel onto that. Yeah, they probably lubed it up because it is it is sparkling that ass

Yeah, like engine oil on his ass. Yeah, this guy's face is crap. I'm gonna make that my profile picture I am making that my profile picture Man's ass and smiling like I'm'm fucking on a menstrual show. Yeah, I don't know. I never thought of the swastikas being sexual though. The whole thing to me is sexual. It's very, cause it's power. That's what it is.

It's, it's. Oh, you're Frank Booth now? You're the. I, well, I mean, that's like the old. You're like House of Cards guy? I, I don't. You wanna fuck a Jew and then push her in front of a train? Wait, I thought Frank Booth was the guy from blue velvet he is I said the wrong name who's who who's the house of cards Frank?

It's like Frank Underwood Frank Underwood. Yes But yeah, I mean, I don't know it's just the whole thing's fucking thing is crazy sexual to me I don't know why and I don't know if I'm connecting it to that scene of the lady with the swastika She's getting fucked. I think that it like fucked up my head. I think that's it. I think there's very first sex scenes I saw I think I I think the reason I'm a trap I only go after big tits is because our hairdresser growing up had big natties and she would always like cut your hair and It was like the first contact I had with a woman Was her just like leaning across and then like a boob touches your shoulder and I'm like rock hard under I'm like touching

Myself under the like little fucking robe that they put on haircuts are fucking yeah, you're a fat 12 year old I'm a dude. I was a fat 12 year old gripping the shit out of my dick. I will fully admit that I had the tarp over me I'm like I'm gonna come Yeah, you know exposing yourself to women dude. I was was 11 I was David to hell when I was nine years old. I was like listen to skanks for the memories and smoking cigarettes Had a porn collection that looked like vinyl I Looked like the guy Philip Seymour Hoffman plays an almost famous for porn I'm just flipping through tape after tape And I'm going, ooh, excellent selection.

Well yeah, if your hairdresser has big tits and they're cutting your hair too, I mean, just cutting your hair, just when they, when they shave your neck. Just the care. I go get my hair cut by like an old Armenian lady and sometimes I like close my eyes and I'm like, I might as well almost gesture and be like,

give me a titty. Yeah, it's like feeling loved. It's feeling cared for. They touch your head, they give you like a head massage. It's very Phantom Thread. It's the sexuality of just being like, cared enough about that somebody's taking care of something for you.

And when they buzz your neck. Oh yeah. Oh, you get the little shivers. Should we give you the shampoo job too? It would start off with a shampoo and I was like, I'm gonna cum, you rubbing my head with this, this is crazy. I haven't had a haircut in four years.

I might start going to get haircuts again. It's the closest you could ever get to cheating. Yeah, truly. Oh, that's true, yeah. Go get a haircut. It could be like an old lady. You could just start cheating too. Or you could cheat.

Well, I actually feel like I'm- With a woman with a swastika. I kinda like when I go to the dentist and the Chinese lady has the latex gloves on and she's sticking fingers in my mouth and stuff. I like that too. I like that. A little bit more of that, you know.

I'm trying to get some cavities so I can spend some more time down there. I wanna just go to places and just pay, be like, just give me pressure. Just somebody put their hands on my fucking face. Smush me. Smush me around, sugar tits. I wanna be crushed a little bit.

Jump on me. Jump on me. Dude, we were just, this just reminds me, we were at Death Valley this weekend and we went to the Badwater Basin, that salt, what is it called, Salt Flat? Yeah, I think so, yeah. And it was me and my girlfriend

and a couple of her female friends, and there was a big fat guy who looked like Coach Buddy Ryan, and it's the lowest point below sea level, it's 300 feet below, and there's a little line that marks it, and I point, I go, oh, that's where sea level is, and this big fat guy who had like one arm in a sling and another arm in a cast, he just where sea level is. And this big fat guy who had one arm in a sling and another arm in a cast, he just walks up to us.

Man. Dude, and he had the goatee in the middle of the fat face, so it looks like a bullseye. And he walked up to us and he just goes, he goes, imagine if you were that far underwater right now, you'd get crushed. And none of us looked at him. He's like, you know what I mean?

300 feet, it'd crush you. It'd squish you up. And I was kind of realizing, I'm like, oh, I think he's into getting crushed or something. He's like, he's crushed, yeah, crushed fetish. He kept walking up to the women in the group and being like, I wanna get, it would crush you if you were this far in the water. Maybe that's how he got his injuries, still.

Is having big fat whores sit on him. Yeah. Yeah. He's the guy that wishes he's really tiny. You've seen that guy, right? And get shoved up a woman's pussy or something. Yeah, those guys. It's a pretty common thing, actually. I think it's called the vore,

is where guys wanna get swallowed. There you go. Thank God we have a gooner on the show. Yeah. A gooner lib. Who has to play coy about it? I think it's called. I think, I don't know.

I remember, because it was the, you remember the Timberwolves They had an NBA account. They had a Brazilian NBA account and the guy kept posting. Yeah, really weird over and over He would post an anything of a big Timberwolf like swallowing Kevin Garnett and then like he goes in his belly and starts jacking Yes. Yes. Okay, okay, yeah. And he'd be like, Timberwolves win. Sorry, I sneezed. Um, Jason, real quick. Can we watch the rest of the rape scene?

There's like 30 seconds left. I'm just showing you this guy real quick. Because you should acknowledge that you're under a Jewish spell. Al Goldstein? Oh yeah, I know Al Goldstein. Do you know this guy? I've read about him before, yeah. He's the reason we have hardcore pornography. Yeah. Well I think we're getting a little too anti-Semitic

if we're upset at a great man. Pfft. Ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah, Ben, let's not throw the baby out with the. Can we? Let's not throw the baby out with the bath water I bought from a gamer online. Can we just be happy he wasn't a pedophile?

And then you scroll that, he's like, by the way, he was a pedophile. He died from renal failure. Yeah, how about that? Cancel, what the hell? Can you like, control F on the Mac? Fuck the Mac, the PC, the hell? I thought it always worked that way.

Yeah, what did he, did he start a magazine? Like, did he start some of the first like Nudie Mags? Zero for zero results. Wait hold on, hold on I have it right here. I'm just gonna bring it, because I have a, someone DM'd it to me actually, so I'll show you the screenshot. Okay.

God fuck that Jewish lady, I hate her. She sucks, or Zionist lady. I think sorry. How does how to sell? Yeah, here we go this guy Ford asked Goldstein why Jews were dramatically Overrepresented in the porn industry he answered the only reason that Jews are in pornography is that we think that Christ sucks Catholicism sucks. We don't believe in authoritarianism pornography Thus becomes a way of defiling Christian culture and as it penetrates to the very heart of the American mainstream And is no doubt consumed by those very same wasps its subversive character becomes more changed or charged

So it's like to fuck with dumb fucking whites? Yeah, I think this is ours. Porn. Well, hey, whatever. You fucked up this one, Jew. Oh yeah, you go. Thanks for all the pussy. Oh no!

Skates for the memories. Oh no, you got me! Oh no, the best moments of my entire life, oh no! Oh no, I've been corrupted! It is kind of funny to think, like there were people that go well if there were no Jews there'd be no pornography it's like all right. Yeah. Come on we wouldn't have gotten around to that.

Are you sure? You can't agree? You sure about that? The second guy made porn for the first guy like alive ever. No he's kind of being a little greedy in terms of the Jewish statement there. What he's doing he's being a troll. He was the guy who was doing pornography in like 1950s, so somebody's interviewing him, he's like,

they're like, why do you do porn? He's like, because fuck Jesus. Like, he just wants to get a rise out of people. You know what I mean? Oh, okay. And people are getting triggered by that and just falling for it. It is funny to just say Christ sucks.

Yeah. Like you're a 15-year-old punk kid. Yeah, he's doing some Gigi Allen shit Which sucks and is gay but also stupid guys fall for it too and get really mad. I guess those guys at the end of their life, they're like, yeah, it's kind of great that I Just thought of I kind of am the reason there's a lot of porn everywhere Like he died and he goes on porn you could argue He's a more honest he's lived a more honest life than most people alive

because it's like what do we really care about just fucking eating and fucking? That's really it. You know? So he's focused on- Maybe you. I care about the Sistine Chapel. I care about Bach and Beethoven.

You look at the Sistine Chapel and you go, that arm kind of looks like at the end of a swastika. That baby kind of looks like a swastika. Getting hard and rubbing your, you and rubbing your dick against tapestry. You're walking around museums thinking you're like a sophisticated guy. You're like, you know the swastika's rather sexual to me. And the guy's like, no, no. He goes, it has a history, right?

A sexuality? No. Anyway, this place have a cafeteria? A bathroom, a single occupancy bathroom Does this one should go appear beta to you or does it appear alpha? I don't know. I know you're a lib Apparently alpha cuz it yeah, it was a part of the Devin for admitting that thank you for admitting that, thank you. That's all I needed.

That's all I needed. I think if you're looking at a swastika, you're deciding if it's alpha or beta, you kind of have a brain worm. I just don't even think about it. Is it sigma? Because it's sigma-coded. And everybody knows, I'm past alpha, I'm stigma,

which means I love a pedophile sex trafficker, Andrew Tate. Yeah, dude, that's phantom tax. Yeah, no cap., which means I love a pedophile sex trafficker, Andrew Tate. Yeah. Yeah, dude, that's phantom tax. Yeah. No cap. Dude, we also had a waitress on the way to the desert. You were in Ohio on this episode. We had a waitress on the way to the desert who stopped by and was literally doing like,

no cap, the ribs are fantastic. Really? And was literally doing like, not my neurodivergent ass for getting your order, like coming back to the table and shit like that? Once we're done watching Edward Norton get raped in his ass by a bunch of Aryan nation guys, we're gonna dive into this one sketch group

because I wanna expose Zoomers for being more cringe than millennials. Zoomers are very cringe. Millennials are fucking cringe too, and we can all agree with that. The millennial cringe comedy bullshit sucks. It really sucks. What Zoomers think So yeah, what's zoom really? They're doing that's really cool sucks ass

But zoomers zoomers are cringe and they also don't even fuck each other by the way. I'm not even sure zoomers are They're not alive our people. They're all gay and they don't fuck at all. Is that true? They don't fuck They don't fuck dude. Look at ground. They don't fuck. They don't drink They don't even like a grass my parents of time where they drink and even read like see like I shouldn't do that They're not having a freshman year of college. Yeah, they're like, whoa, I drank a little too much. Okay, put a pin in it We got to finish watching the area nation. I'm great. Hey guys, 2025 is off to a busy start You don't have time to worry about your nutrition You need factor factor makes me time simple with fresh and fully prepared meals that you just heat and eat. Whether you want to pop them in the microwave for

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plus free shipping. That's code factorpodcast at factormeals.com slash factorpodcast to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. So at this point in the movie, he is still a Nazi, right? I keep going back to that face. It makes me laugh so much. Okay, I gotta actually cut away from it,

but I'm gonna turn the audio back on, and you guys will listen to Edward Norton in the movie American History Acts become raped by the Aryan nation, the Aryan brotherhood. By the way, can I point out, I think you got hard at this scene because there is a swastika on that guy's arm. I think that's why you were getting confused earlier

and thought it was a different woman. Oh, well maybe. I think you're gay and we're getting hard at this See you might be right. It's also a bad swastika. It's a little too even it's not tilted enough. Yeah drab It's a rather dull rather yawn yawn Oh, it's like's slow-mo yeah, oh let me rewind it I want to hear everywhere Wait, did he say the n-word? Yeah Yeah. You want to be a nigga sweet boy? Fuck you! We don't treat you like one. No! Come on!

He's getting fucked in his ass! And he's getting violently fucked in his ass. Oh, it's crazy, it's crazy. Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you, man! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! And he's getting violent when he's fucking his ass. Oh, it's crazy. It's crazy. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you, man. You fucking gay. Oh, sweet.

Fuck you. Oh, shit. That's gotta hurt. Bash his head against the wall. He's unconscious. And now you know they're gonna fuck his mouth. Yeah. That's what you get for being a Nazi.

Goddamn, that was crazy. Yeah. White power's about to come. And now you know they're gonna fuck his mouth. That's what you get for being a Nazi. God damn, that was crazy. White power's about to come. Wait, is that blood coming out of his ass? It's blood coming out of his head. Cause he was thrown against the wall by his head. But yeah, I like the Mexican guard,

he's like, these maricones are crazy, man. You guys, hurry up, finish up. Can you guys explain this prison shit to me? If you are in the Aryan Brotherhood, you can't be gay, right? So why did they fuck him in his ass? They don't look at it like being gay. It's about power.

It's like a power thing. Like you said earlier, it's about power, yeah. But gay sex is not about power. Well, they'll also take the comp they'll take the orgasm Yeah, while they're at it with their retarded rules. Yeah, they don't look at it. Like I'm being a fag right now Yeah, there's the thing in prison where they go. It's not gay. I'm in prison. It's by the way, it's fucking I see what you're saying, but if you can create rules That's all being gay not being gay is creating rules about how I'm not actually a bunch of men in the toughest place to

Exist in a modern society decided it's not gay creating rules about how I'm not actually fucking gay. A bunch of men in the toughest place to exist in a modern society decided it's not gay if we fuck juicy, wet Nazi ass. But what is funny is I think there are distinctions where they'll be like, I'm gonna rape that guy and comment his asshole a bunch. If you start dating one of the trans guys in prison, you're a faggot though.

Interesting. Yeah. Well, how do you think he got his big penis in his ass, by the way? It could be a small penis, who knows? And that guy's pretty big. It's also dangerous too, because Edward Norton,

they didn't give him a day to fast or clean out or anything. He didn't wubub. I would be worried about that. Even if I was like a violent gay rapist, I would be like, ah, I don't like the shit on my cock. Also not even lubing up, you're going into a virgin ass. Like it's gonna hurt. It would hurt.

It would hurt the skin of your cock. I would still, I would have a hard time. I'd be like, sorry, it takes me a little bit to get hard. I mean, it stinks down here. Right, you're like, let me help you, you start eating them out, trying to get them wet. Yeah. Yeah.

It would be funny. Let me get your ass wet. Let me get you wet real quick. But if Devin was a gay rapist, you would call people ahead of the time, and be like, I'm gonna rape you in like 48 hours, could you just like not, could you just eat like smoothies? If I was a gay rapist, if I was a gay Nazi rapist

in prison, I would have the decency to go up to my victim and be like, listen, in two days I'm thinking of bashing your head into the shower wall and raping you, can you just not eat for at least 24 to 36 hours? Do you think I would backfire and a guy would be like, fuck you, I'm eating all the fudge in my cell? Cause it's gonna hurt you more than it hurts me.

Let's just help each other out. Less of a clean up. I scratch your back, you scratch mine. Hail Hitler. Hail Hitler. I scratch your back while I'm fucking you in the ass. Hail Hitler. Just think about fasting.

Yeah, you're like, hey man, hey man, oh, hail Hitler, by the way. I can't fuck your ass Wednesday actually, I'm fucking Greg's ass. Can you get fucked in the ass Thursday? Oh it's your birthday? Damn. Yeah, so I don't know, this is a rough life man.

It's a rough life. Killing Hitler, there's a lot of baggage. The gay sex, fuck who cares about Hitler? Go ahead and believe whatever you want when you're trapped in a box. Yeah. But, the gay rape is crazy in prison. I knew a guy that went to military prison

out of high school, and I saw him like three years after he got back, and the guy was like obviously raped. Really? Did he admit it? No, but like, no, because he was doing the whole like cool guy thing, but like no one could even kind of like walk behind him

Maybe you just like free like if you were standing in a circle with him and you were like I'm gonna get a beer and you Walk behind him to get the baby. I don't want people We were like the no one's a more obvious rape victim than you then a guy who's watching his own asshole Yes at all like a SWAT team. Yeah, okay. Do you guys want to see this? Okay, okay, so this is from the sketch group Grant Beans, which is, you know. Oh, this is your Zoomer humor thing. Oh, I saw this, I saw this.

It was really wild and inventive. Well, but this is, Devan, they've been doing this for like two years and they all hate. They have one. Like millennial cringe comedy, right? They have 1.4 million followers. These guys hate millennials?

They would think millennial comedy is very cringe. What's millennial comedy? And that they're doing cutting edge comedy. Well they would think like millennial comedy is like very cringe and that they're doing cutting-edge comedy Well, there's bad millennial comedy. What's what's what's Like me thinks yeah adulting. I'm doing adulting today. Oh Tuesday. Oh, yeah, those people should be shot in the head. Yeah No, but people have dominated the narrative of comedy within the millennial like landscape, right? You know what I mean? Yeah, I saw this video. I know you're talking about What these guys do you know exactly what they do? It's like a David Lynch Comedy sketch. No, it's one of those where it cuts to a bunch of different random random shit

You just go wow that's impressive because they cared to set up a dinner table on the 10th of reeling. First of all, it's not a David Lynch thing. It's the, they don't realize that they're doing the millennial thing of random. Yeah, they are, yeah. Random. That's the, that is the core.

Millennial cringe core is the obsession with random thoughts and being random and saying, for some reason just saying nachos. Extra cheesy. Zoomer comedy I would think is, anytime I see three people who have an apartment in Brooklyn doing a sketch together. Over and over.

Yeah, there's a couple of sketch groups I don't wanna talk about. Where it's just like, well I'll say it, please don't destroy. Like all the, it's that shit where it's like, it starts off like, guess who got a new job tomorrow? And it starts off, you're like, oh this is a normal conversation they're having.

I hope it- It's shot vertically on a phone. I hope it doesn't go to some really crazy place and escalate over the course of the sketch. And then the twist is an existential crisis about how their dad like never loved them enough or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's, it follows the exact same formula. Exactly. They're all roommates. It's awesome. There's no effort put in. It's made shitty and there's no effort, yeah. Well, of course, they're cool with them and they don't try. Fucking retard.

What's the oldest zoom in? Why get a camera and do lighting and stuff? How old is it? I think 1997? So there's also a- 95? Between millennia, let me change the issue. I think it's 96.

I think 95 is the end of Millennials They're four years older than us. I mean who yeah Lineals what is linear lineals are between like 93 and 99 or as lineals they're on the cusp of they're not Millennials really They're not zoomers. Okay, they call themselves as a lineal They're the ones that really are having like a political voice right now and teeing up the next well. What's before zoomers? Jinae That's the young that's like 22 year old right now. What's a 22 year old right now? He's a zoomer zoomer, okay? Jen a is like or a lineal okay?

No, wait. It would be a zoomer all right well as a lineal is like 28 right now, so these guys I'm 32 I'm a millennial 22 23 of these guys you think yeah, these are zoomers Evan, okay It's grant beans. It's grant beans. It's grant beans. They're random. It's grabbing put it on. I yeah I haven't seen it. They're random Devin and they're not cringe like Millennials. This definitely won't be like a cringe hat This actually is upsetting Paul Walter Hauser really likes them. Yeah, of course. Damn. I like course he does Paul Walter Hauser really likes them? Top comment? Yeah, of course. Damn, I like him. Of course he does. Paul Walter Hauser, on his Instagram this week, he just was praying for people to help people that were addicted to jacking off.

Really? He's like, would you pray with me to help people who are watching pornography? Yeah, those are most of his fans, so hopefully it doesn't help him too much. I like Paul Walter Hauser, but yeah, his Instagram's all like Christ stuff and like, please Lord, stop me from eating the rest

of the zanku hummus Go live on Instagram. He's like guys. I've been nine days without watching porn like keep praying for me I'm like how much were you watching? He really is Richard Jule God that kicks us Hey y'all, I found a bomb at the Oscars Hey y'all, I found a bomb at the Oscars. I found a bomb. Dude, what if he's like, you know how Jeff Bridges did too many cowboy movies, he thinks he's a cowboy? What if he did Richard Jules, so he thinks he's a fat retard now?

He's like, hey guys, I checked off too much, I'm going live. He just got too into the character. He also, Paul Walter has a post like, he's trying to be like a Joe Rogan black rifle coffee guy, like he kind of fell for the whole thing, so he posts himself, he's doing ice baths at like 5.30 in the morning. You know these people that think they're going to change their life by waking up at 4.30 in the morning. He's doing ice.

He's going to fix fucking anything. He's doing ice coffee baths. Yeah. That is funny. I'm not gonna fix fucking anything. He's doing iced coffee baths. Yeah. That is funny. It's a Dunkin' Donuts order that he's getting inside of. Yeah, it's like a gallon of milk he's emptying into the ice bath.

That is very funny. There is a type of person out there that I've known that is, they relate almost like a military level discipline to the arts. Yeah. The war of art. military level discipline to the arts. Like I'm trying to make it as a creative artist. So I gotta do a lot of pushups. It's like that doesn't translate.

You know all the creative geniuses very well disciplined and orderly. Exactly, you waking up early and doing pushups isn't gonna make you funny. Yeah. Joe Rogan. Yeah, like every great artist Get him. Yeah, I love Joe. I think he's a Larry. Yeah, Joe's a great artist No, but like like Kafka like fucking like like guys who were G actual geniuses like Kafka was addicted to Fucking he visited whores all the fucking time. He hated himself for it. Joyce like lived in whorehouses

Van Gogh Was like just getting syphilis all the fucking time he was a drunk He was like taking like absinthe and shit like if you actually are a genius you're like retarded. You're like a retarded. Yeah Yeah, you can barely stay alive You're like you're like baby day babies day out as a grown-up You're just like rambling into like fucking bars and big pits. Yeah Wait, we this isn't Play it cuz it's not well

It's not good But I remember seeing it and being like I've seen at least they tried to do a bunch of random crap. Devin, they've made hundreds of these. It's the exact same thing. It's the same thing every time? It's their thing and there's a lot of copycats of them. Because like, yo, like I'm looking at comments right now, it's like, at no moment was I able to accurately predict

what was coming next. Yeah. And that like- At no moment? At no moment was I able to accurately predict what was coming next. Yuck. So like this shit is like genius for real. Y'all this shit like overloaded my brain because I'm retarded.

Christopher Nolan has 48 hours to respond. And if you're listening to this basically it's just like one random thing after the other. Who are you? I'll be your waiter this evening. What can I get y'all started with? I'll do the soup and for you sir. I'll have what he's having. I'll be your waiter this evening.

What can I get y'all started with? I'll do the soup and for you, sir. Uh, I'll have what he's having. I'll be right back with those soups. You okay? We were just in your room. What? How did we get here? Oh, I don't know. I made a reservation four months ago. Without talking to me. Can you go five seconds without complaining? I could go ten! You happy now? It was the best ten seconds of my life. Okay. Pretty good, right, Jace? At no point in this video was I accurately able to. Yeah, thanks. This video followed no path whatsoever.

Is that DJ Khaled, Ronaldo, Millie Bobby Brown? So by the way, this is what they consider comedy, but you're not laughing. But they hate, no, it's not funny at all. It's beyond unfunny. It's like on a different abstract plane of unfunny. Maybe that's what they're going for. They're like, I'm gonna do left brain unfunny. I think they're like, millennials were insincere

in their comedy, and that's why it was lame and cringe. We're gonna go even further. They go, you know, millennials were too random? Let's make our entire video random. I think it's the opposite., you know, millennials were too random. Let's make our entire video random. I think it's the opposite. I think it's millennials were too sincere by going like, not me needing pizza to function. I need my coffee this morning.

Must has coffee, coffee levels depleted. So they're like, oh, I will reject any meaning whatsoever. And it's like, well, that still sucks and fuck you and kill yourself. They actually took irony further. They're moving even further and then nothing means anything. There's a lot of movement start. It goes to too much meaning

and then we have to break all that meaning down because fuck you guys, you're 10 years older than us. And then it just keeps going back and forth. And past this is like, Jenae people. They actually do talk like Skibbity. They're like, that's Skibbity swag cat. No, I see kids in public that sounds like they have schizophrenia.

They're like, what the sigma? Riz, Ohio And I watch them on their phones and I want to take the phone I want to smash it on a big fucking work because it's killing them Have you seen the Jena kids that their hands are molding around iPads? Yes, like they have big Indentions in their party now fetuses They're getting like hunchbacks big heads and eyes so they can watch their phone better dude Jace hung out Jace realized me and Katie are actually good parents.

Yeah, I told him that the other day. Because I was, no, I told you that the other day. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need to see this on the show. I haven't seen that yet. We like to have fun here, you know? Very good.

You'd be busted by both. I'm a little sincere, you know? Unlike these Gen Z. You're a ball buster. I'm a ball buster. You're like Kil Tony. I don't know, you know? Yeah. You know unlike these Gen Z Yeah, by the way kill Tony some of the best backgrounds on Netflix is a preview preview in history I've ever seen Yeah, I go barbed wire. I go barbed wire and blood whoever thought of that I Go damn they go there. Are you barbed wire and blood sarcastic right now damn? I'm being fucking grant beans right now

Sarcasm loading We type in here The barbed wire kill Tony thing I think I sent it to you guys. I don't think it's gonna come up, but it's there Netflix special and it's them in front of like barbed wire and blood. Yeah, yeah They because they go there. Oh, but you you said you're around other parents and they were yeah I was around other parents and they were just they're openly telling their kid that they the kid ruined their life like jokingly They were just like fucking destroyed my life I hate him and the kids on is just banging away at an iPad and it's literally like AI Peter Griffin be like what the frick 9-eleven send me cab roblox dollars with your mom's credit card. What the frick?

And my this is a three years crazy Most what are you doing to this thing and they call him a semen demon to his face? Yeah, they go Here's my little semen demon here. I fucking kidding. Yes demon to his face. They go, here's my little semen demon, here's take your iPad. Oh my god, are you fucking kidding me? Yes, yes, yes. It's a shit parent.

And they were getting insanely drunk in front of Jay's. I mean, I will say, like, these modern parents and their shitty whatever gen kids. Gen A, yeah. Gen A, I mean, my whole life. I think it's gen beta now. Whatever, I've run into, like, I've met border collies that I have more hope

for their future and helping humanity with. I've received more care and attention. More care, they're more thorough with what they do. You've got that dog that can carry medicine and a little barrel under its chin. Truly, truly. Through the Himalayas. Yes, yes.

If you tried to get this kid to run an obstacle course, it would kill itself. It would impale itself on the little slalom poles they run through. I'm actually, it's getting to the point where I miss people having Machiavellian intentions. At least it was like, there's a level of intelligence you have to have, you know?

I'm like, there's Pomeranians that fucking kick me better shit than you. You suck, you're a worthless human being is what I'm saying about your three year old. You're slim, yeah. Your eight year old sucks ass and I can tell already. And what's funny is their kid sucks ass and then they're like, how did this happen?

How did we get a shitty kid? It's like, because you did it. Yes. And you suck. You suck. Like I don't, if I have a plant that dies, I'm like, well that's my fault. I didn't fucking water the fucking plant.

Accept responsibility. Exactly. Accept responsibility, yeah. Your actions have consequences and getting drunk and telling your son, he's the biggest mistake in your life is not great. responsibility. Exactly. That responsibility, yeah. Your actions have consequences. And getting drunk and telling your son he's the biggest mistake in your life is not great. I think the biggest thing that bothers me

about the new gen. Sure. I think it's a lack of a. Zillennials or Zoomers? I don't even know. Or Gen A, or Gen Beta. You hate newborns, Devin? You have problems with them?

I'll give them a chance. Let's hear them out. We'll hear them out. Yeah, your daughter's on thin ice. But there's a, it's really bizarre, the lack of even, of feeling proud about not even having a mild base level understanding of the past on any level.

Like no one feels embarrassed to not know certain references to the past. They act like you're just a huge loser for knowing. I'm not old though. So I'm not old. It's like, when I was a kid, I wanted to know what the fuck the grownups were talking about, I wanted to investigate a little bit into history.

I wanted to know who Bob Dylan was, just so I could be like, oh yeah, I'm not an idiot. But also they're pop culture stuff. They don't have that thing where they feel like an idiot anymore for not knowing about stuff. No, they just think you're a cringe retard. Yeah, they think you're like, it's that. I'll see you all the time.

I wanted to learn what like Dallas was or Bonanza was or like Little House on the Prairie. Like I made an attempt to know what the fuck that was. You wanted to be a smart, cultivated, artistic person. Like you had a little bit of- Well I just wanted to know what came before. I'm like there was stuff before, right? That they had, and they were kids,

and they liked TV shows the way I liked Doug. You had a- And stuff like what was there Doug? You had a pretentiousness though, which is, pretentiousness is now viewed as like an ultimate sin. It's like not, like to a certain degree, like you should want to take in things that are good.

You should want to experience good art. And like. C-B-D-R-A-S-C-A-T, Sigma in Ohio, Phantom Tech. Yeah, I mean you go on Twitter and you'll see people be like, here's the top 10 greatest NBA players of all time, Jokic, Giannis, fucking Steph. Like just zero. Just zero, they've no.

Nothing ever existed before they were alive. Nothing existed before 2017, and then somebody will like reply like Like top ten ways, you know, this was made by 14 year old and people be like, I'm sorry I'm not fucking old. I'm not fucking ancient It's like dude you fucking I could look up president Kenny getting a blowjob on YouTube right now if I wanted to like you can Look anything up. It's not well the zoomer generation I won't be able to find it on Twitter,

but the Zoomer generation has handled aging worse than any generation I've seen. Yeah. It's, they can't possibly have a, cause they've hated millennials for so long. They can't become us. They're older brothers that went to college and ruined their life and didn't get a job

and moved back in and are hopeless fags, like gay wads. Sure. Mofing around. Big gay fags. Big gay fags. They can't fathom turning 30. Yeah. I saw this goth kid, and he posted a picture of himself. He posted a picture of himself in a dark room

with a candle lit that said 25 on the birthday cake, and he says, I'm officially old. He's looking down like this. You could tell he'd been cutting his his wrists and shit and he was just... The moment you tweet... And people are like, man, you're an old man. Like all the comments like, you're an old man now and all this shit. The moment you tweet that, a World War II veteran

should show up and suck all the life out of your body and he turns young and you turn old. Yeah. Because you're gonna waste everything. Yeah, I guess the Zoomers, they act, it's like, they all act like they're like a black guy in the ghetto, like, wasn't supposed to make it past 25! Now I'm just me and my skippity toilet videos!

Do you think it's because of Peep and those guys? Like all of their people they grew up with that. They have grown up on everybody. Like R.A. and Carter didn't die until much later. Yes, all their favorite people, like, were supposed, they die, they're talentless and they died. And they kinda wanted to die and think they're supposed to die quote unquote old.

Not even talent, Juice WRLD was like okay, but like yeah, they grew up on these people that thought like their stomach was a pocket. Little dead for their drugs. Little dead guy. They've grown up on mentally challenged artists. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little bullet magnet.

Like XX, like, yeah, their first album was XXXTentacion being like I'm sad I beat my girlfriend challenge artists. Little bullet magnet. What up? Yeah, their first song was X, X, X, X, X, X, X, X, X, being like, I'm sad I beat my girlfriend and she had a miscarriage. Yes. That makes me sad, I'm gonna get shot at a car show. Yeah, I'm gonna buy a jet ski. I'm gonna get robbed for a jet ski money.

He got killed by guys that I'm sure of that already. Oh yeah, he got killed by guys who did the movie A Simple Plan, dude, the three of them. There's like a retarded brother, they kill him. They made a simple plan. But yeah, I don't really know who's the person that's like carried this last generation. I at least had, you know, we had some greats.

So here's another thing I hate. I think the generational thing, I know that everything is a construct, but the only way I can describe it is a construct. If some guy's 26 and I'm 32, they go, oh, you're a millennial, I'm a zoomer. And I'm like, that's, you're five years basically younger than me.

Would you shut the fuck up? I also hate the categorization of all of this. That's why I hate even kind of prescribing to it. Especially when you apply it to the arts. Like two of my favorite artists, one of them's 70, one of them's 21. They're both making great stuff currently. It doesn't fucking matter at all. I guess it just kind of goes to show their parents never fucking one of them's 21. They're both making great stuff currently. You know, it doesn't fucking matter at all.

I guess it just kind of goes to show their parents never fucking, or it's never. I think it's just, yeah, I think it's just absenteeism. You never took a drive with your dad and he put on fucking Bob Dylan when you were like 12, and you were like, that's great. The thing is, and I'm gonna sound old, but fuck it, is the dad's putting on Bob Dylan,

but now the kid has the iPad and he's playing the Skibbity Toilet video so he's not listening to it. Dude, I was in the airport, the kid was on the VR goggles. He was four and his dad was just sitting there on his, his own phone, the kid was on VR, the VR Apple vision, the thing that gives you brain tumors by the time you're six. Yeah.

That thing? Every kid is like- Turns you into the Elephant Man by first grade. Yeah, every kid is like in the pods from the Matrix now. Yeah. They're in the goo. They sleep in goo and they wake up to go to school and they scream, they go,

ah! Ah! Yeah, every kid is in the goo. They sleep in goo. And they wake up to go to school and they scream, they go, ah! Ah! Yeah, every kid is in the back seat of their car just with the TSA x-ray machine on their head all day. It's funny, they can't, the people coming up into their 20s, they can't handle getting older at all. At all.

If you go on TikTok or anything, they're all freaking the fuck out about it. I like to hear it. How they're getting, they're turning like 22, 23, and they're like screaming, crying about it. How they're old now. Their perception of time is very bizarre.

And I know everybody's, you're supposed to be retarded when you're younger. And then you should become smart enough to know that you don't know anything by the time you're like, in your like mid to late 20s. You should be smart enough to know that you're a retard. Basically.

But at least like 30, you should realize you're a retard. You should have seen yourself be retarded long enough to know you're retarded. Yeah, you shouldn't be wailing and crying that you turned 23. And videoing yourself like screaming and crying. Because there is something about getting sad. It's like, dude, you're actually the first person

who ever aged and got old. You're actually the first person that's ever gonna happen to. It is insanely egotistical. It's a bizarre narcissist. It happens all the time. We had so many friends that we used to hang out with who'd be mad their career wasn't taking off.

I'm like, dude, I'm sorry you're not a famous person. You're the only person in LA that's never happened to. Dude, you're the only person in America whose dreams didn't come true. That's fucking insane. Your dreams should have come true to the exact detail. Every single person who wanted to become a famous actor and comedian did.

There's no failure, except you, dude. So you should be upset and let it ruin your life. You're the only person that the universe did not reward. Yeah. Actually. Did you not know about the secret? What's the problem. You're the only person that the universe did not reward. Yeah. Actually. Did you not know about the secret? What's the problem? You're the only failure in the world.

Sorry, yeah, some people do, you wanna call them and be like, hey man, I heard the news, I'm sorry you're not Adam Sandler. Yeah. I'm terribly sorry. And some people will say. Sorry you're not Eddie Murphy. You'll be at like the comedy store,

like the once every two years we go and somebody will be sad they're not Eddie Murphy and in the back of my head I I'm like you shouldn't be Charlie Murphy You shouldn't be Eddie Murphy's dad whoever he was. Yeah. Hey guys when it comes to closet staples bird dogs is the answer They make clothing that's stylish and comfortable So you never have to sacrifice one for the other their stretch khaki pants are gonna be your new go-to. Made from athleisure materials, you can wear them to work or to play around a golf. Their new quarter zips look amazing, feel amazing,

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Devin's wearing them right now and you can really, they look great if you're a golfer, by the way. Great thing to wear. Can't wait to hit the links. With that double lined quarter zip. Yes sir. It's time to look good and it's time to feel good. So for a limited time, our listeners get a free hat

with any order when you use code women at birddogs.com. Get this hat completely free when you use code women, L-E-M-O-N women at birddogs.com. Get this hat completely free when you use code women, L-E-M-O-N, at birddogs.com. Support our show and let them know we sent you. Dude can't be James Murphy. You shouldn't write on Murphy Brown. You shouldn't be a guy named Murphy. He doesn't even deserve, most people don't even deserve

that interesting of a name. Yeah, Murph. Murphy, it's too old school. You don't deserve the name of a name. Yeah. Murph. Murphy. It's too old school. You don't deserve the name of a bar fly. Or an old dog that's about to die. Yeah, Murphy.

A dog with flies buzzing around its head. Yeah, a dog made out of flies. A dog getting eaten from the inside out by stomach worms named Murph. An old cow dog they just beat the shit out of. A dog turning into that trimmer worm. Yeah, a dog they just beat the shit out of. A dog turning into that trimmer worm. Yeah, a dog that grew a bandana around its neck

because it's so old and dirty and decrepit. It joined the, it follows a sheriff around everywhere. A sheriff who shoots at it constantly. Go get, get out of here. I'm Hank the cow dog. I'm Hank the cow, I loved Hank the cow dog growing up. Yeah, I don't think Devon had it, I think it was a Texas thing. Every kid read Hank the Cowdog. I'm Hank the Cowdog. I loved Hank the Cowdog growing up. Yeah, I don't think Devon had, I think it was a Texas thing.

Every kid read Hank the Cowdog. Yeah. It was about this dog and I guess his, what was his superpower? Did he have one? He hunted faggots in Texas. He was always vaguely kind of homophobic and racist and kind of violent.

And there was moments where they were like, and that's when Hank the Cowdog turned to Jesus Christ. And he beat the evil Muslim dog in the junkyard. They're getting like Al Qaeda. They get Saddam Hussein out of his hole. Yeah, there's a dog trying to hijack United 93 flight. Hank the Cowdog has to save it because it just came out in like 2002.

Okay. It was to promote the war, which by the way, we're gonna be at war with Iran soon And I need to know guys do I say Iran or do I say Iran or do I say Iran Iran Iran? Iran, I don't know hey, you know it's all China to me Well, we're gonna be we're gonna be at war with them soon because these airstrikes were doing in Yemen supposedly the US has already Said that we're gonna probably accidentally hit some Iranian targets, which means we're gonna be dragged into war there. Are they ever gonna actually go to war with us though? I mean, are they that dumb?

Yeah. Come on. Do they not know? We'll do this for 20 years. Supposedly a lot of people in Iran actually want a war because they don't like how everything is over there currently. So they wanna die. So they're like, yeah, come in here and fucking kill everybody.

Well, yeah, they hate the government too. They're all like having, they've been forced to be like all fucking Muslim and wack kill everybody. And dismantle it. Well yeah, they hate the government too. They've been forced to be all fucking Muslim and wacky. But then anecdotally, I know Aida's family doesn't want them to invade, right? No, they hate the whole like, falala. The falala. What's the falala? There's a lot of Persians that are sane,

that know what we did to them, and that we changed their whole country and they don't love like, now their love languages like blowing themselves up and going, ah la la. Yeah, fa la la la. They were like fucking Zoroastrian fucking, you know, they were almost like Christians and shit. Bad ass shit, yeah.

We like forced them to be unfund, retards, you know? They were Christian starry skies people, like Christian astrologists. They were like hanging out on the beach, with their tits out, it was like Manhattan in the 60s, and then we pulled a bunch of shit, and now all of a sudden they were like, no, no, no, no, no internet, no pussy, no driving!

Dude, we went into the desert, we found the angriest, bushiest pair of eyebrows we could find, and we go, you're the president now. You're now the guy, yeah, we, it's a whole thing. I really don't believe you guys, I just, in my head, I'm like, it's always been like, primitive over there, and there's no way. No, it we go, you're the president now. You're now the guy, we have this whole thing. I really don't believe you guys, I just, in my head it's always been primitive over there. Isn't it crazy?

No, it was like hip and awesome. Dude, there's a country on earth where- There's no Muslim golden age, you guys drank the cool way. Why don't I help you know, because they fuckin', what unfun people would put fuckin' pomegranates in their rice? That's true.

They had- That's a life of luxury. They used to have a little soul, you know? They were like, hey, I'm gonna get a little fruit in the car. What if we overcooked the rice a little bit? Turn it into a cake. How about we make the rice almost like fried?

Hey, we're having fun here. We're having fun. We are having fun here. We are having fun here. Just kidding, put a tarp on your We are having fun here. Just kidding. Put a tag on your baby doctor so I don't fuck her. But now, like, you can't fucking, you can't go on, like, you can't check your fucking hotmail without getting shot in the head.

Yeah. If a woman drives a car. They go, you had too much fun today. You saw an ad on Ask Jeeves. Yeah. They somehow have Ask Jeeves still. Yeah. If you're a woman who picks up car keys, they'll just shoot you with a rocket

Yeah, blow you to pieces. So from what I understand is that the Houthis they're these guys They're they're fucking with us in the Red Sea But the only reason they're fucking with us is because they're mad Israel's not doing the peace fire So since Israel didn't stick to the peace fire now, they're firing at people in the Red Sea. Huh ceasefire That's what I said. You're saying peace fire. I said ceasefire. I said peace. I said peace fire. Sorry, I'm retarded. It probably sounds like the same thing.

Oh, I thought I was saying ceasefire. Anyway. You kill all of them and you go, peace fire now. Let's do a peace fire. So there's a ceasefire that they didn't stick to so the Houthis started fucking with us in the Red Sea and fucking with Israel too, so now that's gonna draw us into a war over there.

And where are you saying we're gonna accidentally kill Iranian people probably? And there's some targets. So now we're gonna be dragged into a war where it's us and Israel versus Iran. And everybody else. We're not getting dragged into a war. We are high stepping into a war.

Well it's like, I think this stuff used to work where people were like, how did we somehow get in a war? And now it just all seems calculated and fake from the beginning. It's just, I don't know, the writing is just bad now. Cause it's all theater anyway. I just wish it was a little better. And that's the funny thing is they used to- Not that I feel sympathetic for like Houthis

or Hamas or whatever. But it used to- It's just like retarded. Houthis are Iranian? No, the Houthis are in Yemen. They're in Yemen. They're like the pirates who are attacking all the trade ships. They're like fucking up like Amazon. And I'm sorry, but you can't beis are in Yemen. They're in Yemen. They're like the pirates who are attacking all the trade ships.

They're like fucking up like Amazon. And I'm sorry, but you can't be a pirate in 2025. I gotta say, they're all kind of the same to me. Of course. It's like, maybe you might be like, well, the people in Victorville are gonna attack Bakersville. Mm-hmm.

I mean, to me, they're all, they have a thing on their head. Some of them, I imagine, have swords, some have guns, some have guns, some have like RPGs, bazookas. The guys in Fresno are pissed at Sacramento. Well they suck all, they all suck ass. That's all that I know.

We blew up you. I don't wanna go! They have some great fighters that have a good ground game. I know, you know, in the UFC, that's really, I don't really care, don't know. Just, I don't wanna die. Well't know just I don't want to die Well, it's the ultimate fell for it again award for all these people that said Trump was gonna be like more peaceful Yeah, he was like why I saw him like watching the strikes the other day

Like it was like a hat on He was just like I call him a faggot He's like that guy like he's playing mad They call him a faggot. Yeah. He was like, Yeah. Like he was playing Madden or something? Watching his friend play Xbox Live or something.

Dude, he had an iPad, he was playing like the Simpsons like touch game where he just, he hits a guy and then he explodes on the screen. Yeah, so I think that's what supposedly Sean, I see Sean Ryan now and he's like tweeting about like, imagine what you're seeing now in the Middle East could happen in our country.

That's what Sean Ryan was tweeting and I go, oh this is like the operative that they're rolling out. Because they started rolling out tons of alien stuff the last six months to a year. So we're already scared of like foreign entities. There's more paranoia. I think they're running ops with like fake UFOs. The US government did confirm, by the way,

that there are aliens that we've come in contact with, but they haven't disclosed that. There's gonna be a 9-11 event where they're, like, a bunch of aliens land and they're wearing turbans and shit, and we're like, the aliens are Muslims, so we have to go to war to the whole Middle East or some shit like that.

Yeah, or it could be a big alien hologram that they have comes down, and we don't know if it's real or not. And the alien tells us that it should be like, there should be no nation states, and it should be like one government and one currency. The alien comes down and every American should lease a Tesla for $2.58 a month.

Zero money down. You're leaving money on the table. The robot from the Earth stood steel is just like, five year lease option. No money, no financing needed. I think that's the theory that makes the most sense because if we've got in contact with aliens and we know they're real, the government goes,

okay, this is great leverage right now to really, we could make maybe a coin. We could get a coin, maybe a new rug pull going with the aliens. We're gonna make an end of the world coin. You follow the money with it. I do think it's funny that Elon Musk has somehow figured out how to treat Donald Trump like a black ant. Or he's raising his kid named like Shield or whatever.

Bullet blocker, come here. Come here little Teflon, Mr. Meat Shield, where are you? Little Meat Shield. Bullet blocker, come here. Come here little Teflon. Mr. Meat Shield, where are you? Little Meat Shield. Going to his aunt just being like, I just need $8,000 to start my own cigarette company. So Sean Ryan's not only pushing the alien stuff

big on his show, and we also know he's a CIA security contractor and a drug trafficker, supposedly he could be lying about that, who knows. Literally all of them are. You can't trust anything they're saying. But regardless, the thing he's tweeting about now, he goes, imagine what's happening in the Middle East. It actually is very possible it could happen in our country.

So I guess the idea of terrorists walking around killing everybody, bombs blowing up. Right. Which is hard for us to imagine because there hasn't been a terrorist attack in a while. On domestic soil since 2001, which we either let happen or orchestrated.

I read that we're not even deporting a lot of people. No, it's down. So 32,000 people were deported, which Biden's last month was 59,000 or something. So fell for it again. It was all theater. They just posted some videos of handcuffs and some guys with neck tattoos being thrown away.

Yeah, they want cheap labor. Why wouldn't they let more people in? The only thing they're doing is for big business, that's all. Whatever benefits big business, that's what they'll do. Jace, you wanna know what just rolled in, by the way? What? What rolled in? Because way what what rolled in

Because all Trump's really done is like corporate tax cuts and stuff like none of the other stuff has happened sure So this is just announced the US government will no longer require shell companies to disclose their owners and beneficiaries per the US Treasury It's like they're really just they're running out of the house with all the money as it's burning down and yeah stuck inside Yeah, yeah, you're not even allowed to know anymore. Yeah, they're starting like shit down economics. Trump's like, what we do is all the rich people on the ledge, we shit down and then that shit falls on the poor people. But they have like all these donors like Adelson

and Peter Thiel and all these guys. And it's just, it's interesting because like Matt Walsh and Shapiro and all the people that are the supposedly alternative media now are the state media. And they're gonna just keep supporting Trump and saying whatever they need to say so they can keep, you know like the Turning Point USA guy, the Charlie Kirk, like he's just gonna support whatever Trump is saying.

Now Charlie Kirk is saying that eight million people died in the Holocaust now. I've said it many times. I don't even know it. Oh, I've said it many times. He said eight million. He's adding to it now. He did too. That guy, Charlie. I've said it many times. I don't even know it. I said it many times. He said eight million. He's adding to it now. He had it too.

Yeah. That guy, Charlie. I was giving him six to seven. I was like, I'll let that slide. If they said six to seven. The number was always six to me. It was six. It was always six.

Then they said six to seven, now it's eight. Seven, I was like, okay, maybe it was like 6.5 they rounded up. Eight is crazy. Eight, now you're trying to fuck me. But now you're a Holocaust denier if you say it wasn't eight. So if you argue with someone who says it's eight, you're like a guy who should be thrown in an office.

Why is Charlie Kirk saying that? Because Charlie Kirk's a super pro Israel. Because Turning Point USA has to back whatever Trump is saying so they keep getting funding. Right, right. Yeah, exactly. Charlie Kirk looks like an evil emoji. He looks like if they had that smiling emoji but he had horns and he was

insane. He looks like the evil puppet from the Ghost Moms books. Yeah. You think he's ever flossed? Charlie Kirk? I don't. The gum inflammation of that. His mouth must reek of shit. Yeah. Poop and pee and all sorts of stuff. He had a great appearance on Newsom's podcast. Ooh. Gavin Newsom, appearance on Newsom's podcast. Ooh. Gavin Newsom, by the way, is awesome.

I love you watch all this stuff. You're like a catty political. I will walk in, you're watching like Newsom on like Pod Save America or something. Newsom's guy, he's completely reinvented him. Yeah. It is funny. It is funny, you're like, how can the Dems,

how can the Dems finally get everybody back and win in 28 and Newsom's like, I know, and he's like, starting a podcast called like, Today with Hitler. Gavid Newsom's just like wearing a trucker hat, being like, fuck ins, fuck k's. I think everybody on his podcast is, he's like, it's like Steve Bannon, Charlie Kirk.

Everybody's moving a little, even Candace Owens now, her whole thing is she's like going, she's visiting Harvey Weinstein in prison and she's like, she's like, she's like free Harvey. Yeah. Like it's completely. Like she's gonna prison break him like a grand escape.

Okay, yeah. Candace Owens is going into, she's sneaking to prison letting him rape her. Yeah. Candace Owens is gonna have like Jewish payas like hang off the side of her head within a couple of months. Well she went against Shapiro.

Yeah. Yeah. But now she's, I thought you said she's going like Jewish now, she's like talking to Weinstein and shit. No she's super still, Candace was, she stood strong on the whole Israel-Palestine thing I think. Oh I thought she argued with Ben Shapiro and then left the Daily Wire.

Yeah I think so. I don't really know where she stands on stuff. She's totally like anti-Israel. Okay, good for her. Yeah, that's what I thought. Yeah, she heard in Jackson Hinkle. Yeah. Hinkle still follows me.

Shout out to Hinkle, by the way. Shout out to Hinkle. Shout out to Hinkle. I don't know what he's really doing over there. I don't know what he's up to. I saw him with Hamas and he was jumping up and down. I was like, I think that's a little far, maybe. I saw Hinkle, well yeah,

I don't think they actually give a shit far maybe. I saw Hinkle, well yeah, I don't think they actually give a shit. Yeah, of course not. I saw Hinkle on like a Jimmy Dore live podcast and he started doing like Indian voice jokes and I was like, he's been listening to Lemon Party. Yeah, ripping our ass off. He's a nice, when I met him, he was a nice guy.

He's cool. He's a really nice guy. None of these people you can really have, I don't know what's going on with any of these people. You're kind of like, you're kind of saying like, I was at a party, I met a snake, didn't bite me one time. J.C. follows me, we have no allies.

We have very little people supporting us. Yeah. He follows me. Okay. He follows me. I think Jackson Hinkle is great. I mean, he was, you know, I guess anti-Israel too. But yeah, it's the thing with the anti-Israel guys.

I'm like, I don't know, do you just hate Jews? No. I don't know, I can't tell. No. But I, yeah. No, see, that's the trick that's working. Yeah. Then yeah, there are people, you know, if you post something anti-Israel, there are people,

you know, and there are replies that are like, you know, posting curb stomping, the Jewish meme of the guy with his hands like this. Yeah, that guy. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. So, there is stuff, there is,, there is cons to the whole thing, but like, did you see Bridget Phetasy, she was posting that there's these guys who are- She's really good.

Yeah, she's great. She always says something. Her and Barry Weiss, love them. That woman always says something that I've heard already. She says the worst version of something I've already heard. She is really groundbreaking. She's politically homeless homeless although her political party is very obvious. Yeah, she's like time Yeah, like she'll tweet like does anyone feel like things are just fucking weird right now and Rogan's like can you come on my show? You're like breaking it down on a level like it never before seen she she was posting that

That the right she was posting that, she was posting about the rise of antisemitism and Barry Weiss or Weiss or whatever, that fucking ghoul's name, that big slug, Slimer. I call her Slimer. She was sharing Bridget, like, yes, Bridget, you go. And Bridget was just like, she goes, the reality is that right now there's just so many people who are live streaming about the Jews and they're making millions and millions

and millions of dollars. And Barry Weiss was like, so true, it's a grift and all this stuff. I'm like, yeah, all these anti-Jewish guys, they're getting like Spotify deals and they're like in mansions and they're driving Rolls Royces. They just talk shit about the Jews all day

and how much they hate Israel. That's the real ticket Right now. Yeah, those are the big bucks Yeah, I mean, no, it's like gotta be terrible You're not getting a be banked to be a show like like Jimmy Dore that like covers the Israel-Palestine stuff on like a Fairly honest level you got to be like terrified every time you post on well But also the idea that you're going live and like saying hate Jewish people and to make millions of dollars is insane. That's not happening.

They're inventing new realities constantly that everybody is sharing. It's a grift to be anti-Israel, if you're anti-Israel, you're anti-Jewish people. Barry Weiss is retarded. Remember when she was the idiot about Tulsi Gabbard on Rogan? She called her Assad Toady

and then didn't even know what a toady meant or was. She's had many. She thought it was something she puts on toast. Yeah. Barry Weiss looks like a full tic. She looks like she's just filled to the gills. Dammit, careful, she's Jewish. Do not call Jewish women a tic on this show.

Okay, we can't be in the platform anymore. It's because she's. Do not call her a blood sucker. It's because she's got big fat ham hocks and a fat back. She got fat back. Fat back. Fat back.

Yeah, no, they're all. Barry West, you look like Barry. Barry West looks like you throw her in the pan before you put the food in. In Chinese cooking specifically, in a big wok. In a big wok. A big fiery wok. You watch it reduce.

Just dance. You test if a wok's hot enough by throwing Barry Reese in the pan, and if she dances around the pan, it's hot enough. Fuck, this is so good. Yeah, fuck her. Yeah, fuck her. I heard in Bridget Phetasy.

She's doing, Barry's doing stuff in Austin with Palantir. She was hanging out with like Joe Lonsdale and Alex Karp, and they were doing big Austin with Palantir. She was hanging out with Joe Lonsdale and Alex Karp and they were doing big events promoting Palantir's new programs that they're executing. That's cool, you know when you're in an environment like that, like you're on the side of, you're on the right side. That's what she's, I mean, if she could hear

anything we're saying, she would be calling nine different companies to shut us down right now. Yeah, she'd be calling, she's like, hello Jews, shut them down. Palantir's doing all the pre-crime stuff where they're arresting people based on, they go, like in the future you will be arrested and you go, I haven't done anything wrong, they go, oh no, no, no, our programs 100% can predict

if you are going to break the law and this has always been right. It's called anti-minority report. There we go. Very good. Yes. It's like they're like, we've created a very complex algorithm.

And then the algorithm secretly is just like, if black equals guilty. Dude, if that becomes a thing, I'm going to need to forge like an ancestry.com thing to say I'm like 2% Jewish. I got to be like 2, 2 and 1 half I'm like 2% Jewish I gotta be like 2 2 and a half Everybody knows like Mangione they completely caught him through a face tracking software They run through every video screen in the fucking yeah, I know but that's illegal and they can't do that

Yeah, they literally got him through a McDonald's pay screen that they were just hacking every single fucking screen in the goddamn country looking for the guy. Yeah, this is the stuff they used. Yeah, and then they sent out their puppets. They're not allowed to do it. That's why they contracted Palantir and stuff to do all this illegal shit that they weren't allowed to be doing. That's what I'm saying.

And that's what they're rolling out. It's the new CIA, and then they have all their puppets like Barry Weiss and everybody Rogan who has on who goes like, I'm a man of the people. That's why I believe in technocratic dictatorship that will ruin us all one day. But even Alex Jones is like, I love the billionaires. I love technology, guys.

Peter Thiel just gave me $80 million secretly. I love Peter Thiel. I'll say, I'll get the mark of the beast. It's weird, Infowars now, it's a show where they're just defending, they're defending billionaires and corporate tax cuts. It's the weirdest show. It's more surreal than him talking about Sandy Hook.

What's up? Didn't that one journalist get killed? Oh, the guy that worked for him? At his home or something? Yeah, he had murdered out in front of his home, but I never looked into it, I'm not sure. Yeah, but he might have been going, who knows, he might have been going public with something,

or maybe said to Alex, hey, what are we doing? This doesn't seem to end, and they just killed him. It could be something, or he could just be killed, who knows? It's also Austin, I mean, who knows? Yeah, I mean, 6th Street. There's a knockout game out front of his house. 6th Street wandered over to him. There's pretty bad parts of Austin, in my opinion.

Yeah, the mothership. You've been around the mothership. I've been, yeah. So around the mothership now, there's like nine guys with sniper rifles that are standing outside. Yeah. There's like nine Chris Kiles. There's guys on the roof that looks like the...

KC Rocket is escorted into the building like Obama. Yeah. There's actually a big 6'8 swat guy who carries Rogan around like he's in the Mad Max movies, he's the little guy who just gets carried everywhere. Austin sucks so bad. Yeah, fuck Austin. Fuck Austin, fuck Austin.

It's literally like a disinfo city. It's so good. All the clips of Rogan like six years ago being like, I believe in like, the most important thing is like universal basic healthcare and like people need help out there. Yeah, and he's just like, he like that's right. They should eat bugs He's talking to mark Anderson like I can't believe Elizabeth Warren didn't let you link the Treasury to the blockchain

They got it they got the hooks in him bad Yeah The mark Anderson thing drove me crazy because he's literally talking about linking up the treasury to cryptocurrency. Like turning us into Argentina where they have the Elvis impersonator blowing the country to pieces. And Rogan's just like, I mean the Dems are just so stupid, I can't believe it.

You're a retard. Sorry. Sorry, I'm a little asleep, I just got back from the desert. I guess if you're given two choices, you will convince yourself one of them is an amazing choice because you made it. So if you have a big ego, you're like, no, but the choice I made is actually perfect.

Yeah, you're walking into a Baskin Robbins and your flavor choices are shit and piss, and you're like, people who eat shit are retarded. I'm a piss man. I'm a piss man. I love piss, my daddy love piss, my kids will drink piss. Meanwhile, I'm in the back, I'm dunking the poop in the pee.

Yeah. And I'm sucking the pee out of the turd. That's how you get it real good. I'm sucking it down, I go, I can't believe they're feeding us this shit, it fucking sucks, but I love it. I think my favorite guys out of all this are the ones who are still like fence sitting on Israel.

I know, yeah. They're sitting on the fence to not piss off their fan base. It's very funny to me. Cause it's such a, it's funny to like, if you read like a World War II history book and then you're like, I really get to toss up. I don't know. I really don't, I don't know who's the good guy

in this book actually. And my favorite are comedians who think they're like politically woke, but they're doing like Mort Saltakes from 1958 where they're just like, I mean, you know, the Democrats are crooked, but the Republicans are just crooked. It's like, whoa, what?

Dude. Well, they were attacked on October 7th. I guess. So I don't really know what you're talking about. Devin's right. Yeah. Out of nowhere. The Devin's right.

They were attacked out of nowhere. Did you see that? They were spinning babies on a DJ table and they got attacked. That woke cuck burr, Bill Burr. Yeah. Woke cuck, his black wife got in his ear about Israel and now she hates, he hates Jews.

I can't believe Bill Burr hates, I can't believe Bill Burr hates billionaires, he's woke. He's a woke Nazi, Devon. He's so woke he hates Jews cause he's a Nazi. I saw him, I watched the special. Woke Nazi. I watched it. If you're Woke now, you're a neo-Nazi, Devin.

Did you know that? If you're Woke, you love Hitler. It is actually pretty funny, just watching stuff. Watching the Bill Burr stuff is interesting because he's not doing himself that many favors because it's not a great special. Well no, his specials just, he's fucking 60. There's still some really great parts, but yeah

there's a lot there's also a lot of parts where he does sound pretty lazy like some of the some of the Anti racism whatever takes are a little lazy so I go well that's gonna be but they're not even clipping the right stuff They're clipping the baby. Yeah, which I'm like that was good. That was good. Yeah, yeah What do you do? What's yes? I drink some coffee grounds at the bottom of the cup. Oh, I apologize Yeah, but then all those people will But that can have a coffee grounds in your coffee, but then all those people will share some of the worst stand-up comedy You've ever seen in your life. That's right wing and so great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean literally the worst stand-up comics You've ever seen no they'll say that's great. They'll show that rapper, I forget his name,

the face tattoo guy that sucks. Tom MacDonald? Tom MacDonald, thank you. And they'll be like, great! Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know, I appreciate Bill Burr for being the one guy who's not sucking Joe Rogan's cock from the fucking back and making it jizz all over his face.

At least his saying, at least his saying consistent, like fuck billionaires, fuck rich people. He's not changed. That's what's funny about it is that it's just, he's just, yeah. He's not changed, the world's changed around him. And so now he has to suck to them. Devin, his wife's black, okay?

I mean, he's, you know, he's an idiot. He's got a black life. Because his wife's black. So he's bad now. All that stuff disgusts me. Every time I see people fucking with him It makes me really sad. I'm like we are finished. Yeah. Oh, we're done. Like we're done Look go after for like not being like he could pull a batter bitch. Sure. Yeah color ugly. I don't come mind. That's fine Sure. Yeah, do what I mean say whatever you want about Obama's wife I don't give a shit to tie it back to the beginning. Mm-hmm, but like, you know

don't give a shit, to tie it back to the beginning. But like, you know, don't act like he's a retard because he's, it's like inter, like we're against interracial marriage now, is that true? Like that's where we're at? Yeah. You can't fall in love with a black woman? Yeah. That seems to be like kind of 50% of the narrative.

We kind of have regressed to that point, it seems. Yeah. But I guess you're woke now if you're like, if you think segregation or interracial marriage is okay. So like now you're woke for some reason. I just thought that was like normal. I guess they like it. I also don't think like white people

should be breeded out also. Like is there a middle ground here? Like I don't think white people should like not exist. I don't know anything about his wife besides that she's black. So like it's just very funny. Well she hates Trump. Just because she's black. So like, it's just very funny that- Well, she hates Trump. Just because she's black, well she could, okay.

That's like, that's very common. Is that some specific to getting with a black woman? Wasn't she flipping off Trump? She was flipping off Trump, right? Yeah, yeah, all right, yeah, yeah, yeah. I see drawings of like him, like a drawing of Nia. Have you seen like, like draw, mean people will draw like bill burr's wife And it's like her at the top of the Empire State Building like holding him literally in her palm something

She's like King Kong. I made that up, but yeah, I've seen I could imagine what would happen. It's really really disgusting All you can really say is I guess Anthony Kamiya has won. Yeah, Kamiya's in his mansion like the end of their will be blood. It's, yeah, yeah. I'm like, this is vile. I'm finished. It is vile, it is.

It's vile, it's disgusting. And it ruins it. I go, I shiver when I see it. It ruins racism for the rest of us, because we're like, I'm just trying to have fun. I'm trying to have a good time. And all it does is make Bill Burr feel more correct about what he thinks he escaped,

the Boston racist bullshit roots, which he never even ever sounded like a racist guy or crazy. He was just always him. And so if he ever catches wind of these things, he must go, I couldn't feel better about how I've matured as a human. That's insane. He's like, I knew 200 of you guys growing up,

they all died of liver cirrhosis because their anger just consumed them. Yeah. I've listened to stuff with him that it's making no sense because he says, if I'm, because he says he's getting attacked for, have you heard his argument where he says, you know, he goes, I remember, dude, I remember 2018,

like you made a Caitlyn Jenner joke, you would get canceled. So now why can the guy, Elon, salute Hitler, and he doesn't get canceled? I'm like, but you're against cancel culture, so why are you calling back for this stuff to come? And also that point is really bad. That's just retarded. That's a really bad point.

Also, I don't think Elon was saluting Hitler. I think he was trying to win back the Gropers a little bit with the H-1B thing, but I don't think he's actually a Nazi. I think that's a retarded thing to say. Yeah, on the special when he goes into that, he was really losing me. I'm like, you're sounding pretty out of time.

I don't even know what you're talking. He went off on Terry Gross on NPR. I listen to him on Fresh Air talk about, because he's in Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross or whatever. and he gets all, it doesn't feel as genuine. He goes into like Bill Burr mode where he starts kind of yelling at Terry Gross about the Me Too movement, and I'm like, what, it's 2025, what are you talking about?

I don't even remember this period of time where a comic couldn't call somebody fat. I guess it's true. It's an hilarious interview because Terry Gross is terrified. Terry Gross is absolutely terrified. He's literally like, I don't know. Terry Gross is like, okay.

She's sitting like a big red button under her desk. There's also a very funny interview back in the day where Gene Simmons went on Fresh Air and he basically was just talking about eating pussy to Terry Gross and she got really ungovernable. It's very good. She sucks. Actually, Bill Burr is a woke fag that I think about I'm coming around now

No, I think he's also saying like white women are the reason like the times they hijacked the times up movement and all this stuff It's like bill shut the fuck up. That's kind of true Okay, okay, okay bill now go into why BLM was fake. Right, well as you want. Why won't you do that, Bill? Cause his wife's a fucking. Cause he wants an outlet to still, so he's hating on white women, it's a very easy scapegoat. It's like, all right, all right Bill.

Yeah, but here's the problem. Go into black people now. People are thinking Bill Burr even thinks about that type of shit before he does a standup special. He's never been that type of guy. He just happened to catch wind of the white women. I don't think it's like a calculated, like trying to look good thing with him.

I genuinely don't. Well, if he caught wind of what, how people are drawing his wife, they're drawing, he would go so far to the left. If he knew they were drawing her as Donkey Kong every day and like her pounding bananas on the ground. He would just be getting butt fucked by the smartless guys on stage.

I mean, maybe that's the reason he's been getting a little woker, because guys are drawing his wife with fucking fangs coming out of her mouth. So he's like, fuck. He wouldn't be getting shit if he was constantly in Austin hanging out with Rogan, talking about how great Trump is. Yeah, if he was constantly in Austin hanging out with Rogan talking about how great Trump is Yeah, yeah, if he was repeating fucking faggot talking points that everybody's repeating Yeah having Mark Zuckerberg on his show and all this horse shit. Mm-hmm Mark Zuckerberg to be like I fucking love pussy

I fucking love pussy and coffee Yeah, I love my I love my compound bow dude, I love my compound bow I love shooting arrows out of the string of the compound bow. So Devin, are you sad, in closing, are you sad that we're gonna go to war with Iran? I don't know, I don't care really actually. I mean, I care, but is it?

But the Houthis, Devin. Every day, it's like the same thing, so I don't know. Devin, Yemen. Yemen, so Devin, picture this. Yemen's down here, and then Iran's somewhere up, it's like here same thing, so I don't know. Devin Yemen. So Devin pictured this. Yemen's down here, and then Iran's somewhere up here, and Israel's here, and there's gonna be a whole thing. I think we just gotta like- And they're different places.

I just think we should cancel the Middle East. Yeah, I'll be honest with you, when anybody talks about anything in the Middle East, I view that whole area as just a place I call war town in my head, and it's just places we bomb and that's it. It kinda looks like big lots in my head. Yeah.

Like a big lots parking lot next to a Walmart. It's a big liquidation sale, but it's humans. Yeah. Everything must go soon. Yeah, exactly, closing. I don't think the Iranians are even dumb enough to actually just let their country be decimated by us. They're not gonna get into a real war with us., there's like also like not really any real wars anymore like kind of you know like that America does

It's all like just Sean Ryan's bracing us for to go to war like oh there They're there that guy's putting out the memo well Sean Ryan is weeks away from being found dead in a hotel bathroom from shooting cocaine into his toe by the way, wait, actually, let me see if I can find this real quick in closing, because I have a little something something here from Shawnee Boy. Shawnee Boy.

Because as we know, I... The dope, the dope is calling. I KO'd Sean Ryan. Yeah, you fucking dunked on his ass, man. KO'd. That was great. Thank you, buddy. And everyone was like, people were like you're a conspiracy theorist. I'm like he said it I'm like I didn't I didn't do any diving on anything

But you should just go on Wikipedia by the way if you want to be a conspiracy theorist now go on Wikipedia They'll tell you everything they're doing and you can just connect thoughts pretty easy You don't have to like right you know, you don't have to like do heavy research and find classified titles. There's a lot of articles where POTL's like just being like, I can't wait to enslave all of humanity. Yeah, to stop woke from rising again. This is a, Sean Ryan left this voicemail on my phone.

Yo, what's up, I'm Sean Ryan, I'm huge fag and I'm gonna try and kill Ben cuz he's talking shit on my name And I like to take it up the ass and I really don't need that to go public Wow, that's crazy Crazy dirt on him. Yeah here And I'm like crazy. He would leave that on my phone. Yeah weird wild Sounds exactly like it. Yeah, it sounds It's weird how much he sounds like a comic that I know no, that's actually an AI voice thing Oh it is. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I thought it was I'll tell you who after the show wait

Who'd you think that was I thought that was I thought that was literally like Dave Ross. Oh, no No, that's that's what Sean Ryan sounds. Oh really? Yeah, and that's through an AI an AI voice program where you can put in speech, and then it it exactly sounds like that kicks ass. Yeah Yeah, that's what Sean Ryan sounds like oh really yeah, I've just seen his fat face and said fuck him No, no Sean Ryan's very it's very monotone. He just sort of sits back He's like I've never actually told this story before but and I just I destroyed the country of Ecuador told this story before. But I destroyed the country of Ecuador. We were eight clicks to the west.

We were eight clicks to the west. And Peter Thiel told me that I need to destroy Ecuador because they need to get coffee beans cheaper at his blue bottle coffee store he goes to. All the stories they make those. Have you heard all of his war stories where he talks about like, I don't even think he really served. didn't really do like many tours by the way I think you did like one. I think a lot of pussy shit

I think a lot of the guys who go on the podcast are like just completely stealing shit They heard from guys who actually were in the shit Well, the thumbnails now will literally will be I got fucked. I got butt-fucked by an alien and so Yeah, it's like a guy you went to church with or the thumbnail for the Sean Ryan show will be it'll be some guy Veteran with PTSD and the thumbnail says I killed children. Yeah, he's going He's doing soy face. Yeah, and then you click on and it's just like it's like That it's soldiers talking about how they could like committed war crimes Yes, the same is like you go on YouTube and there's a whole category of ex mobsters that were like, I killed 30 guys.

They're doing like a podcast about it. The Gambino crime family. Welcome back to Podfathers. This week we're gonna talk to a guy who made a guy rape his own daughter at gunpoint. Yeah. So I read the whole show, it's people confessing to things. I'm like, is this the Geneva Convention?

It's actually very gay. Or is this a podcast? Are you confessing things to a board? The mobster thing is also- Is this the Nuremberg trials? Very gay because they're trying to be like, I'm a tough guy. I'm a mobster for life. They're like, by the way, I snitched on 85 guys.

I fucking, I was a rat. That's why I'm alive. I'm a rat. But I'm a tough guy. I wear I fucking, I was a rat. That's why I'm alive. I'm a rat. But I'm a tough guy, I wear a ring, and I got a little jacket.

Dude, those guys will rat for like 80 grand, by the way. No, they're all cats. Like 80 grand and you can walk. They're cowards and pussies. I know, it's so funny. They're like, I'm a tough guy. I went and I killed the guy's daughter with a gun. Italians genuinely are the worst race of people.

No, they really are. They really are. They're the lowest race. They're 100% the worst race of people. No, they really are. They really are. They're the lowest race. They're 100% the worst whites. Easily. Easily. Easily, of all whites. And that's including Germans.

Yeah. You know how much Italians suck? We let Jews say they're not white. We give them that. Italians try to say they're not white, and we go, no, no, you suck ass. Yeah, yeah. You're below white trash.

Well, they don't have enough power to say they're not white. The way Jews have power. The parents try to say they're white, and we're like, you're kinda half black. Well, they don't have enough power to say they're not white Should I say they're white like you're kind of like half black though. Let's be honest Sicilians are at the very least. Yeah Anyway, I'm gonna order McDonald's. Nice. Do you guys want McDonald's or Bell? I'm gonna order between shows I might take a little bit from you. Okay We can coordinate upstairs or Devin. do you want different food? No, I ate before we recorded. Shame. Shame. All right, is that the pod? Oh yeah, Patreon.

So you're not listening to this on YouTube and you never will again. Patreon.com slash live and party, which you can be listening to, or sorry, you could be watching the video. Again, I keep getting messages about this. The audio is still on the podcast apps. Because the video is also hosted on Patreon, we're not gonna post it on the bonus RSS feed. Please stop messaging me.

Please stop emailing me about this. Stop messaging Devan and Jason about it. How do I download the episode? It's on Apple and Spotify like it has been since the beginning. It always will be. Even when we move to our own website, it will still be on Spotify, right?

It still will be, right? Can I ask you a quick question though? Why is there no audio on YouTube? Like I get you can't upload video, why is there no audio on YouTube? So, and you can, oh, and I will keep uploading on YouTube so the and you can oh and Ios will keep uploading them to my ex because it seems people actually watch on there so I'm gonna keep doing that and The website is probably three to four weeks away

In terms of we're gonna keep testing it make sure the paywall works We're gonna have chats and forums and we're gonna try to get all sorts of stuff launched for the fans asking Why the volume so loud in their headphones you you just have to turn it down on your phone That's not us doing that Just FYI And then Probably what we'll do once we launch the website by the way is we'll also leave the patreon up too So don't cancel your patreonons in anticipation of the website we're not gonna like

Double charge you or something like that when we roll it out. We'll make everything Seamless and the patreon can still be up so you could stay on patreon if you don't want to move over to the website You're still too lazy There might be time and everything like that, but the website's gonna be a fun place where we can do whatever we want You can comment whatever you want. We're gonna have a forum We're gonna have a live chat going and I think we're gonna start doing more content for the yellow kings Maybe like a monthly episode or something like maybe chats by the pool something like that. We'll see so Yeah, that's that's been the episode. Thank you guys for please continue to share it

We're still banned. We're still locked out of our YouTube channel, so please continue to support and to share Die miss anything. I don't think I missed anything. I think I know you got it. You got it sweet. Yeah, sheesh All right, that's phantom tax that's for his Ohio. That's so skivvy. Yeah, that's the ad that's no cap. Riz Ohio Sigma Beta Plot a guy that's so. You just. Dude, I go, this is my skibbity suicide. My baby fucking drowned in the skibbity toilet. Cause I, no cap, I left the Rizzing lid up and my baby, Ohio, died in the skibbity toilet.

J saying all the Gen A, like the Gen A slang looking like that with the headphones in the skippity toilet. He's saying all the gin a like the gin a slang looking like that with the headphones in that I look like I'm in training to be a better pedophile. You're training to be a pedophile a pedophile Yeah, damn PDF file. Mm-hmm. Does this say yes, sir. Okay. Bye everybody. Goodbye Goodbye. Out in the west Texas town of El Paso, I fell in love with a Mexican girl. Nighttime would find me in Rosa's Cantina, Wicked and evil while casting a spell. I love was deep for this Mexican maid, I was in, wild as the west Texas wind.