lemonparty - 141: Happy Birthday, Jace

Episode Date: July 8, 2025

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Hey Jace, um, happy birthday. Put it down. Let's see what this piece of shit is. Oh great. Wonderful gift. Glass protector for my phone. Really outdid yourself this year buddy. Oh no, I actually got you a gift too, by the way.

You did? Yeah, let me show it to you. It's in the bag. You gotta take a deep look to really get in there. Where is it? It's right fucking here! Motherfucking piece of fucking shit! Fuck you! Motherfucking? It's right fucking here! Motherfucking piece of fucking shit! Fuck you! Motherfucking piece of fucking shit!

Happy birthday, dude. Motherfucking piece of fucking shit! Fuck you! Fuck you! You wanna go record? Yeah. Alright. Let's go. I Think it's specifically it's so ilean eel to be into you Bon Jovi Oh, yeah, Bon Jovi and journey if you're into that as a millennial you're being a so ilean eel

Yeah, Jace you were telling me about the ladies' tits from Law and Order, they're no good now. Oh, yeah, Mariska Hargitay, she was a very hot lady, nice big juicy tits, because her mom, J. Mansfield, huge knockers back in the day, died in a car wreck, tits burst into flames. Tits weren't that big, I guess. If she died in a car wreck.

The paramedics were at the scene doing CPR on the tits, couldn't bring them back. They were just sucking her tits, people showed up, they're like, what are scene doing CPR on the tits. Couldn't bring them back. They were just sucking her tits. People showed up, they're like, what are you doing? I'm a doctor. You're supposed to press the bone in the chest. Squeezing. Just EMTs just coming onto her dead face.

Just absolute psychopaths. I mean, she was like insanely busty for that era. And very into, there's that famous picture of her like showing her tits and then that other actress is staring at her. Sophia Loren, like angry, Sophia Loren's like, I'll kill you bitch. I will pop those in the middle of the night.

You fat titted whore. God damn you, how are you this way? You're like, you should be on ball honeys. We've never seen a woman stacked like you. We don't have Bang Buss yet. We don't know Gianna Michaels. This is crazy. The men these days have their pants up to their nipples.

They're happy to have any tiny tit. They can't even believe this. You're like, you can handle black guys. This is wild, Jane. You can commit sin. Sin by making love to a black gentleman. She was so fucking hot. She was very hot. You know how hot a woman is when they last into now? Yeah. When you go oh yeah I can see. Like you go to a WW2 hall. I can fuck her now. You go to a veteran hall and they're like I used to I jacked out to Jane

Mansfield so much. Yeah. I used to bust in my helmet looking at a picture of her. And people called me, they acted like I was hip hop. They said I was half black for wanting to fuck that busty bitch. I thought this was Marilyn Monroe. No, I know, she gets mixed up a lot. She's what people think Marilyn Monroe was. She had the greatest big naturals of all time.

She kind of pretended to be a dumb blonde, but she was a lot smarter than people thought. She was totally using her sexuality to gain control over some things, and Mariska Hargitay was her daughter. The law and order, huh? The law and order, Olivia Benson. Who also had fat did, he's not quite as fat, but still good.

Yeah, and she had no idea that she was her daughter for a long fucking time So well into her adulthood because her family lied about it and all these guys lied about it because they kind of were trying to protect her Because they didn't want to interrupt the only family that she still had left right and they didn't want to know people jacked off To her dead mom. Yeah, exactly Jane Mansfield Mariska Hargitay's father who she She thought was her father whole life isn't Jane Mansfield had aniska Hargitay's father, who she thought was her father whole life, isn't.

Jane Mansfield had an affair with an Italian, like, oochie coochie coo, like a rapist guy, a fat rapist guy, who she meets in the documentary. Big, oily, stinky gold chain. Yeah, it's just a smell. Guy pulls meatballs out of his pockets. That type of guy. Yeah, sure.

But he's from Italy, so it's much more clean. He's not a piece of shit like New Yorker. Yeah, no, it's like a self-containing cleaning system. Suave rapist. Yeah, he's got pH levels, like how a pussy cleans itself. And so that, so also her father, who she's known her whole life, is not her father. So people just kept it under wraps.

All these 80-year-olds were like, you really wanna talk about this now And that's about it I really thought the documentary about like you know like like just comparing tit sizes and stuff and it was a little it was fine people cupping her breasts Taylor's putting like Like measuring her nipples and her areolas they go you are you are missus manfield's daughter But I will final, I need to suck. Yeah, we're going to, we take you down to the Chinese theater. You put your tits in her tit cups in the cement

and see if they fill up the same. And then I get to jerk off to them a little bit. See, you guys do appreciate women's history and you know 100%. 100% I love women's history. I love it. I'm from an early age, I was looking up Russ Meyers movies on daily motion and jacking off to him Women who had been long long dead

Who's Russ Meyers? He did like faster pussycat kill kill So you were going to Mr Skin and diving in Russ Meyers? Here's the thing is Russ Meyers to me is like Grandmaster Flash He's one of the OGs of the art form. I didn't know you were looking up like super vixens and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, Russ Myers kicks ass. Cause he was in, Russ Myers was like in 1957, he was like, what if a woman's tits. That's kind of like Jane Mansfield's, the guy that, her actual dad. Cause you had to be a real scumbag to be jacking off the big fat titties in 1957. What about making movies about them?

I love women from the past. I'll fuck Rosie the Rivet. I'll come on that bitch's face. I'll fuck her little bicep. Fold it up and I'll stick it in the crease. What do you need from me? I will do it. I'll work in that factory. I'll make bullets in a factory and fuck your arm. I love unions. There's something worse about that than just masturbating to the written word,

you know what I mean? Masturbating to a very old faded photograph from colonial America, like 1865 it's all fading, you're just standing in front. Doing a com tribute. With your dick in your balls now. Doing a com tribute to Emily Dickinson You're coming on a steel plate

Just close your eyes and beat off mm-hmm. Yeah, just imagine it just imagine something come on man No, I'll get a look at two hills in the distance So yeah, I'm looking at I'm looking at the Wikipedia page for white herbs wife and jacking off You're jacking up the Mary Todd link. Yeah, I'm jacking off to a picture it took nine hours to take. And it's kind of blurry because they moved a little too much. Tons of glass had to be broken. Yeah. I guess the rich back in the day had access to pornography

but it had to be in the form of an oil painting. Well, here's an interesting point then. You fall out of your chair. I go, actually, and I hit your leg so hard it snaps my finger. I feel like I'm getting the tour of a museum right now. I go, actually, dude, we should start that. A jugs museum. Yeah, the Goon-zium, we should start that.

We gotta start that. But there was a thing, early movies were full of pornography, tits, bush, asses, women getting fucked, women sucking dicks. We watched the first porn ever, remember the cartoon? The guy who kept fucking. Old porn's funny, like Flapper's porn. They're usually gay, they're fucking guys asses. Yeah, and they go, hello my baby, hello my darling,

but they're like face fucking a lady. At the end he thought he was having sex with a woman, but I think he was fucking a donkey in its ass. And the donkey was like giving the thumbs up to the camera as it closed and said the end he thought he was having sex with a woman. I think he was Fucking a donkey in its ass and the dog he was like giving the thumbs up to the camera And then it closed and said the it ends with like the three stooges like And then he like keyhole closed. Yeah, I'm like I guess people that's when they were supposed to come Yeah, they go. That's all folks cuz he came in a donkey But so it used to be really fucking it used to to be like really fucking dirty. Like they'd show Bush and Pussy Lips and shit. Giant Bush.

Giant Bush, big Rubenesque women with big ass hips. The first bang bus was on top of a penny farting bicycle. And they'd all sign it. The first bang bus, they're all wearing those goggles. Exactly. So the Dutch wouldn't get in their ass. Amelia Earhart bang BangBus. Yeah, it's four women in a pyramid on top of a biplane

and they're all getting fucked. So what happened was the Hays Code came through and I think. You know the code. I know the documents signed. I love Jace so much. I love Jace so much, this is amazing. I love Jay so much. This is amazing.

I go, listen, I got some steam and you're cutting me off. I actually, I think I know this from Christian college. I'm not kidding. Really? I took a morality in media class at Abilene Christian University and they talked about the Hays Code was one of the first things they talked about.

Because I was blown away, I had no idea that basically the Catholic Church, the archdiocese came in and was like, these movies are making us rape boys, so you've gotta knock it off. And the Hays Code basically ruled Hollywood with an iron fist until the, I think late 50s. It was the reason the first toilet appeared on screen in fucking 1976, like in All in the Family, because of the Hays Code.

And why Lucy slept in separate beds and all that. Yeah, exactly. If you watch any old thing and they don't refer to fucking or a woman slightly not having a full suit on or a full dress, it's because of the Hays Code. And it's interesting to me how we will, our country keeps rocketing back and forth between extreme depravity and extreme

Modesty just back and forth through his credit was all in you end though Yeah, it was all like everything was in you end though You know like they they would they like the james was like all like dumb blonde jokes, and she'd be standing there She going like a talk show and they go like well. It's a little distracting Yeah, they go in the crowd would like cheer and guys would stand up and just cheer. Well, it's very nice to see you. And people would be like, ah! She would do like USO shows, you know,

and just the army, everyone's just like, ah! Oh, the USO shows, there would be like Bob Hope with a rifle just shooting people, climbing onto the stage like World War Z. But it was almost hotter because it wasn't just all out in the open. Exactly. You know?

Yeah. It was very hinty. It was hinty, which is like, oh god, you're like, I remember watching old movies where they had love interests and stuff, but everything's so prude and above board that you're like, I grew up kind of thinking like, like how did anyone get made? Like did people fuck? Like cause every movie, you know,

you never see a scene in an old movie where like the guy like is on top of her and then like rolls over like, well that was great. Like it was just- Thanks for letting me bust. Yeah, it's just like, it was just love. It was just implied that like I'm in love with you. Yeah, you watch like-

But that's it, but that means like, I'm going to stick my penis into your vagina tonight. But they would have implied, like, I'm in love with you. But that means, like, I'm going to stick my penis into your vagina tonight. But they would have to be like, shut up and hold my hand. Yes, exactly. They give a big smooch under the moon. Yeah, what's that Kurt Gable movie about last night? And it's the famous scene where the lady, whatever her name is,

she rolls her fucking ankle up and a car stops for her. But that was like their equivalent of like Last Tango in Paris, where they're like, I can't believe, you know, there was like rush limbaus. Being like, yeah. Wow, so she just showed this ankle. Yeah, she showed up to like three inches above her knee cap and that was like, that was like, that was like,

taxi driver for them. Yeah, exactly. People go, say boy, did you see Sally Clark's knee? Well, I went to it happened one night, I jacked off three times, one showing. Clark Nichol. This guy's in the ward, it's like, God, her MCL. Can you imagine?

I wonder what the back of it feels like. Does anyone know what the back looks like? Oh my God, I'd love to get my hands on Marilyn Monroe's tendon. Oh that Achilles, I'd slide my cock up and down that Achilles. I'd put my ballskin between her toes and make her squeeze it. Because that's all I know about a woman's body. I'm gonna fuck her clavicles.

They're all eating beans out of a can, getting shot at by Germans. Yeah anyway, let's go rape a bunch of German girls in a farmhouse. Let's go learn about pussy by raping German women. They're not human. I'm gonna desecrate them. I'm gonna desecrate them and then later, Steven Spielberg will make a show about me.

But if I had 10 minutes with Jane Mansfield, I'd kiss her, damn it. I'd give her a big smooch on the tip of her finger. Little does Jane Mansfield, I'd kiss her, damn it. I'd give her a big smooch on the tip of her finger. Little does Jane Mansfield know, I've raped women to death in barns in Germany. There's skulls under hay in Belgian farmhouses. But if I could just smooch. But all I want is a big smooch from Sofileran. If I could get that boy, I'd come in my pants.

I'd come in my very high waisted pants. But it's just funny how quickly, like everybody who's watching this in 1934 completely forgot about fucking watching women's bushes, you know, in 1918 or whatever. Sure, yeah. Yeah. It's just, that's how quickly culture gets erased

and replaced with something completely new. Yeah. And then just every generation is rebelling against whatever the last rebellion was doing. It just goes back and forth, back and forth. I mean, there's like Chipotle commercials that are more sexual than this Clark Gable movie. I know. Walking around the mall now,

if you guys been to the mall lately, it's like everything is warm. It's insane, everyone's wearing pants that like, the pants go into the pussy. Everyone's pussy is showing. Yeah, it's crazy. I was at the fair. I've noticed I'm seeing a lot of snags.

So much camel tone. Unbelievable. There's big ads for, I just see the pussy, I see the pussy lips and the lips and I see the clit and the whole thing. Yeah, I know. They should just spread it open

so you can see down the barrel. It's also very upsetting because a lot of these, the Lululemon pants, they are sucking everything in. The minute you pull them down, it's like boom! It's just bad, it's bad. No one has to be in shape now because of these pants. The Spanx? Yeah, God knows what you're actually looking at

when you pull them down. It's probably insane. Biobare bag. Just a bunch of high fructose corn syrup hips. Just a bunch of just shit, I'm sure it smells, everyone's vaping. I'm sure the pussy has some sort of chemical smell. It's got plastic in it.

It's not good. That's rolling the odometer back falsely. That's the, you're getting yourself a lemon, a lululemon, matter of fact. Yeah. A lululemon, a damn lululemon. You're getting yourself a damn lululemon. You got yourself a damn lululemon.

You got a car that won't ride, David. They go, this pussy was just fucked by a little old man who only fucked it when he went to church. Every other week. Is Anna Nicole, by the way, her pussy was probably perfectly intact, Anna Nicole Smith. Yeah, because it never was penetrated by anyone

under the age of 90. That's what I'm saying. She probably never had sex, actually. She's technically a virgin. Her hymen was intact. She fucked wheelchairs. Anna Nicole Smith occasionally rubbed her pussy against the wheelchair and used WD.

She was like, she was an old guy's official, like, like, luber. Like, she would, like, lube up the wheels, you know, to push him into a Cheese factory and he'll be died. You're gonna slug up my wheels with your pussy. I will say I've never judged the old man though. No, no, I don't judge either one of them. I judge the lady.

I think it's a beautiful thing. I think it's more honest than 90% of relationships. I think it's legitimately more honest than 90% of relationships because the old man is like, I'm a billionaire, I'm banging a human pair of tits who's 23, and she's like, yeah, I'm dating the cryptkeeper, so he'll die and give me all his money. It's very upfront how transactional it is.

Would you do that if you were a billionaire and you were like 93? Yes, yes, fuck 93? Yes Fuck my kids Fuck fuck my legacy Thanksgiving is awkward Christmas is awkward Yeah, I don't care your wife is he now younger than like your grandchildren. I would that point No, I would legitimately it would be like big Christmas all my kids They're all fighting to get in the will all my kids my grandkids my great-grandchildren lovely game to play

I it's great. And I already feel like a god because I'm all, they all treat me like such to get my money. And I'm there and I go, this is Anna, she's my new, she'll be getting all of it. She comes in at the last second, I fucked all of you up, she gets all my money. Deal with it.

And I think that's beautiful. Yeah, I mean, if her tits are great, then who really gives a damn? Jane Mansfield had next, I mean, it's unbelievable. She's unbelievable to me. I watched this whole documentary, and I knew about Jane Mansfield, but I always was like, wow, Monroe, Marilyn was the main one,

but Jane, it's like Kobe Jordan, you know? It's like, she was nippin' at her heels. But she was an iconoclast, too. She was a real game changer. And it was just unbelievable to be just such a fuckin' pog in those days, like on both sides. You go for Audrey Hepburn, she make you crow? Audrey Hepburn, who's that fuckin' porn star

that everyone loved because she was like natural, she's like young looking. Natural. The lady on the Shawshank Redemption poster that covered her. Rita Hayworth? Are you talking about now or back in the day? Aubrey Hepburn was like their version of that one porn star,

like Reynolds or Roxy or the fucking, I can't think of the name right now. She was a porn star way back then. Now, now, she quit and everyone makes fun of her because she has kids now and all that shit and everyone's like disgusting, like kill yourself or, like come to her. Yeah, what of her name right now. She was a porn star way back then? No, no, she quit and everyone makes fun of her because she has kids now and all that shit and everyone's disgusted, you kill yourself or like. Yeah, what's her name? Riley Reed?

Riley Reed. Aubrey Hepburn was their Riley Reed. Very good. People were like, damn it, she's built like a pencil, but I like it. I like it because it feeds into my pedophilic tendencies. Yeah, exactly, she's small. I imagine her as a small little thing.

I fuck. Is she even of age to smoke cigarettes? I don't care. I'll fuck her. I fuck kids. It's the 40s. I fuck kids. I love it.

It's the 40s! Aubrey Hepburn, yeah. Aubrey Hepburn was amazing, but like not stacked. It was just face. Yeah, but that's what we're saying. James Menfield came in a time when the leading lady was Katherine Hepburn. The women the women were faces back then. They were fucking unbelievable.

And they had they had such charisma and they were they were incredible. They were truly truly the last era of like stars, you know, legends. And and and then but then some people came onto the scene that were like, listen, I'm sponsored by AVN. Jane Mansfield, Marilyn Monroe were like they knew it We're like they knew it there. They're Titans They're pioneers of an industry where at a time when like they were kind of like I mean like I could get shot in the head Having tits this big like some fucking prudes like religious psychopath could shoot me It's like cuz it's like cuz he hates how much he's jacking off to me exactly exactly

Their whole their whole existence is a sundown town. Yes. They have to get in. They were titty sundown town ladies. They were reverse vampires, they have to get inside. Before the sun goes down. Or they will get shot in the head and raped. I am genuinely so impressed

by the incredibly sexual women of those days. Sophia Loren, Jane Mansfield, Marilyn Monroe, I'm sure there's others. But man, they were fucking amazing. And they were like Pistol Pete. They invented a new way to play the game. Yep, they really did. And they weren't like super talented on screen,

but they just knew like everyone at USO shows would fuck, was like, they were helping out the morale of the fucking country. Marilyn Monroe got fucked so much It became art how much she got fucked like that movie blonde is just about how much she got cummed in it's an insane Yeah, yeah, she got cummed in so much Elton John wrote one of the most beautiful songs of all time about her getting cummed in Yeah, goodbye Norma Jean Nick Cave wrote the soundtrack to that. I was just listening to an interview to blonde blonde Which I didn't know everybody was really mad about too.

Why was everybody mad about blonde? Cause she's just getting like, She's getting like ass raped. She's getting brutally fucked the entire movie. Is that not accurate though? I imagine Marilyn Monroe, she's sitting by a pond somewhere, the sun is out, there's birds chirping, she's being raped. It could be, I'm sure it's all accurate for all these women.

I mean, I, God knows, I mean, the people think like, you know, Weinstein put women through hell. God knows what like a Jane Mansfield, you know, was put through when you had, I mean, God knows. I mean, the people think, like, Weinstein put women through hell. God knows what like a Jane Mansfield was put through, you know, like to make it on some level. Those old school studio execs. Those old guys, like insane. But like, I think. Samuel Goldwyn.

I think the Marilyn Monroe movie upset people because it was kind of like, well, you're just kind of doing this so then we can all watch Anna de Armas have sex for two hours. It really, I don't know how much we needed to see this. It's not really It's just kind of a porno and people were kind of like, you know She lived a much bigger life other than getting violently raped. Yeah every 20 seconds Exactly. She also took pills. She talked to pharmacists. She took pills. She got she got she got abortions from Dr. Feelgood

Yeah, the whole movie's insane. She's gonna rape like everything. Like the toilet seat is like slamming onto her and like locking her in. There's like rats coming out from the toilet bowl and like eating her clit. And you're like, oh my God, dude, everyone knows she's the hottest woman on earth.

This is insane. There's like scenes where somebody rapes her. There's scenes where somebody rapes her and then somebody else like is consoling her and then he rapes her. He's like, he did what to you? That's terrible, let me get a piece. You're telling me there's woodland creatures descending on her?

It's insane, no it's insane. It's her. Yeah, it's so white. She picks up the phone to dial 911 to say she was raped and the phone starts mouth fucking. I imagine her being held down in the woods by a grizzly bear. Yeah, like a bear comes out of the woods.

Not eating her at all. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Yeah, just butt fucking her. It was the best. And RFK goes, now it's my turn. Can I get that bear cum? To fuck the bear.

Can I get that bear cum? Yeah. I mean, I will, I know disrespect to those women who laid across the barbed wire so that The whores of our days could walk to freedom. Yeah, but it's too much now You think they went too far. They should walk back. I'm saying it's just like no one's special now Yeah, when's the last time you saw a woman you like you think yeah, it's great Who gives a shit because now it's like it's like watching like women yama where you're like, there's a seven foot seven guys

Bill like an alien who can shoot better than anybody. Maybe a. It's a bunch of three and D guys. Everyone's a hybrid power forward. They can dribble up court. And you're like, it's just, it doesn't matter anymore. It's too much. It doesn't even mean anything anymore.

Nothing. But that's why you're attracted, really, let's be honest. You're attracted to women with power now that have big jugs. Sure. Talking about Pelosi's cans. Sure. Yeah. Nancy Mesa's jugs, Lauren Boebert's big pushed up tits. There's so many big jugs. Talking about Pelosi's cans, Nancy Mesa's jugs, Lauren Boebert's big pushed up tits.

There's so many big jugs, you need big jugs in a fucked up situation. The evil. That's right, power dynamics. The evil separates them now. It's like now I'm really into you if you're day trading. If you're insider trading, that's hot. I gotta say, Giselae Maxwell in those pictures.

Great picks. I can't wait to see the trial. Great picks. Great tits. Great picks. I love her. I gotta say Giselae Maxwell so in those grayers great pet great to see the trial great great hits great What I love her Giselae Maxwell, I love her what if what if the trial comes out and it's it's just all the Drawings they do from the courthouse, but he just gives you like fucking G With like nipples poking out we're are clearly playing pocketball in the audience. You see that Michael Wolfe guy, that writer?

No. Who's that? Who's the guy that wrote Fire and Fury? Is it his name something Wolfe? It's Michael Wolfe. Was that the Trump book? Yeah, yeah. So I have a clip of it actually.

I tweeted it. Did you guys see, so he was really close with Epstein because he was writing a biography about him And now he's trying to come out and say like Trump's a pedophile and stuff. Yeah This guy yeah this guy here Author Mike Michael Wolfe describes Jeffrey Epstein showing him Polaroids of Trump with underage girl victims Yes, I can I can describe them. There are about a dozen of them. The ones I specifically remember

is two of them with topless girls of an uncertain age sitting on Trump's lap and then Trump standing there with a stain on the front of his pants and three or four girls kind of bent over in laughter. They're topless. Because he's funny. Pointing at Trump's pants. Because he was killing it. He's killing it. He's their top. Because he's funny. Pointing at Trump. Because he was killing it. He was killing it. He's a pedophile and he was doing a full set.

He's doing a full set. Like many comedians. He's a classic comic. If Trump wasn't president, he would have moved to Austin. Him and DeLeah would have been killing it. So are they saying that Trump came in his pants as a bit and everybody made to make everybody laugh He said those are just the Polaroids that Jeffrey Epstein showed him Uh-huh, which is interesting because he's admitting that Epstein was showing him his personal stash of CP of child pornography

Which someone was really mad at me in the comments. He did say unknown age couldn't tell Yeah, I know Yeah, he said they were very young. Yeah, unknown age is a little. But it could have been 19. Yeah. He's guilty too. Epstein sat him down and took out his old shoe box and was like, let me show you something. Yeah, it was a scrapbook.

He's like, this is a butterfly caught in Jackson Hole, and this is a child's dance. He had them like they were rookie cards. This is our vacation to Honolulu. We were on the big island, and on the little island we fucked a bunch of kids. It was like one of those 70s slide shows. They like clicked.

I think someone actually, I think they deleted it, but they said hey, they did one of those like hey, friendo. Yeah. When you use the term CP, it's very triggering for people who are victims of sexual abuse. We use the term CP, it's very triggering for people who are victims of sexual abuse. We use the term C mass now Uh-huh. It's like child sexual material something. It's like CSM a s or something. Okay They're always gonna change the goalpost move the goal but now you say C mass, you know for three months

Then they go that's very triggering. But why is he triggering for people? I don't know I can guarantee that somebody who is not raped as a child because if they were, they wouldn't have the confidence to be an annoying dickhead online. I don't really know how it's triggering because it's like they're acting like they're captors or the pedophiles that fuck with them were like referring to CP the entire time, like self-aware. Like a guy, like Jeffrey Epstein was like,

I'm making CP right now. I love fucking kids. You're all a part of CP. I love fucking kids. You're all a part of CP. I love being a dictionary definition of a pedophile. I'm a pedophile. Oh, here we go.

This is the person. Please do not refer to CSAM, C-S-A-M, as CP or any derivative. It is harmful to victims. In casually linking to further the stigma, abuse, victims suffer suffer your intent is right Just something to consider, please and thank you. Well, these are being nice Yeah, then somebody responded with the dog that implies that you're gay underneath it Good response by that

Sure Twitter hit that but they won't hide like kill n words memes Concerning oh Jace do we have an ad? Oh, yeah shit. Let me uh, yeah, I gotta pull that up real quick. Oh Yeah, we got two ads look at that All right. Hey guys, we've all been there. You're hungry, but the only thing in the fridge is half a pack of soy sauce. Factor is here to turn things around. Factor's chef crafted dietitian approved meals are ready in just two minutes, making eating well a breeze.

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who then cheated on him with Future. Is it true? Yeah, this one. No, the one to the right. The one to the right. She got a bunch of plastic hers. She fucked Future. She fucked Michael Jordan kid. Yeah, like everybody She's a this Scottie Pippen. That's Scottie. That's Scottie Pippen. Yeah. Yeah one of the greatest NBA players of all time Well, it's weird that his penis starts here. I guess that's where this was at a big Liam Neeson party

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Jacket, I forget the exact name Has a lot of pockets Ben can put his his pipes his his questionable reading materials all of it can fit his muscle relaxants. Hard drives, sunglasses. For every copy of the Turner Diaries. It can all fit, conveniently, in his jacket. I got the same jacket in a dark blue, I love it, it's great.

By working directly with top artisans and cutting out the middleman, you will get luxury prices without the markup. Like I believe that jacket was 70 bucks, 69 bucks, something like that. They sent it to me for free. They sent it to you for free, but for the working man. Yeah, I think it was like 75.

75, something like that. I've spent way more money on way worse jackets. This is a great jacket. I would easily spend 300 bucks on this jacket. It's a great jacket because it makes you vaguely look like you're in the show Yellowstone. You vaguely look like you're hard working. You look like you fix things kind of. Yeah, but you're not wearing Carhartt and looking like a poser.

And no one wants that Carhartt thing on. People thought I hurt my back fixing things, not just living. Trying to wake up. Not sitting too much. Trying to get through the day to day life. Stewing. Tweeting. Walking around GameStop.

Making gun finger bangs at people in the mall. Making direct eye contact with them. Well you're standing in line for Auntie Annie's hurting your back. Walking up to a Mexican gentleman and just doing this at him in public midnight release for the Nintendo switch to Standing in line hardware eight hours eight hours company store

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I think we made me we didn't sound like ourselves Remember the thing they kicked us off for drawing nipples on a woman's ass. Yeah, but we just we just talked about it this time Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah, it's actually true. We talked about it last time. They said hyper sexual audio Description or something like that and they kicked us off. Yeah, but we've said yeah I think but the gambling everything on earth whatever That wasn't the gambling thing in that episode No There was a gambling thing on another one and then they hit us which we weren't talking about thing in that episode. No, there was a gambling thing on another one, and then they hit us, which we weren't talking about gambling on that episode ever.

And we didn't have a gambling sponsor. And then the other one was, we were talking about drawing nipples with a Sharpie on a woman's ass, and then titty fucking her ass. And they claimed that- Well, I'm doing the bit again. They claimed that it-

Which is a flag. I hope we get flagged that it's exactly this type set. They said it was hate speech. They didn't even say it was sexual. They said hate speech. No, no said hate speech hate speech was when we watched the EDM festival the October 7th Memorial where they're all playing EDM Right we were just sort of watching it So as long as we don't make this as long as we don't make playing on TV as long as we don't make jokes about Jewish people rape

Sex it's all women. Good thing. We don't do any of that on this show. We're a okay. It's all arbitrary It's impossible to tell you got it's the same. It's like a metaphor for life You got to walk around as if you're not about to die at any moment. You can't be thinking about it I guess you're right. You just were pulling up from half court It's actually it is it's a natural to think about your own death to be obsessed with it. Mm-hmm It's much more natural to just whatever's coming. You can't stop it. It's coming it's coming for us that's that's that's narcissism I don't know what may be coming but I will go to it laughing Herman Melville as quoted by Brendan Frazier and every the whale interview he did really yeah he kept quoting that

one part of Moby did he think he was doing Moby Dick is his brain that melted from playing DS and one cowboy hats do you think he was playing the white whale and I'm telling people thank you for giving me the Oscar nomination for Moby Dick. I'm playing the white whale in Moby Dick. I'm the whale. I'm the whale. I'm the whale. And Captain Ahab was played by my cunt daughter

who called me who said I should burn and fry. In that great movie by Darren Aronofsky, Moby Dick. They should just, Darren Aronofsky should remake Moby Dick but just have Brendan Fraser play CGI Whale. Well Gregory Peck is in a movie, a Moby Dick film from like 1953. Yeah, I watched a little bit of it at your place. Yeah, you came over that one time

and Gregory Peck's phenomenal. He's fantastic. And then Orson Welles plays the way father mapple He should have played the well actually plays father mapple mapple a fat name to play father mapple He gives that big sermon in like chapter 8 or something like that the big sermon about oh the sermon when he's on Nantuckia before he gets on the boat. That's correct. Yeah. Yeah, there's this big beautiful Hellfire and brimstone sermon and Orson Welles delivers it with this, he has like a LeBron beer.

Yeah, and they cut, and he goes, now I understand you have 80 tons of krill for me to eat. In my contract, I requested 80 tons of krill. It is crazy, because he's doing a lot of stuff in a long one shot with the sermon, and you're like, how did he go without eating for that three minutes when it didn't cut? The reason they cut to the crowd is so he can sneak in

a couple pieces of chocolate. That's why when the camera's not on him, you can kind of hear him be like, I'm gonna go and try to get Abraham, and he's kind of a little sticky in his mouth. It's a little sticky. He only does it in one take. Yeah.

You know how Brando, towards the end, they had to staple his lines to other actors in the scene? With Wells, they stapled just turkey legs to other people's clothes. I will say this, here's a good transition, actually. Because you know I love big, great, big fat bastards. Whales, people. Of course. Devin, you know this about me. We all know this about you. You're one of my closest you know I love big, great, big fat bastards, whales, people. Of course.

Devin, you know this about me. We all know this about you. You're one of my closest friends, I love you. You look like Quint talking about fat people right now. Great big fat bastard chief. You actually look like you direct BBW porn. You do! God!

He's like Ron Howard for BBW porn, yeah. Yeah. And I'm Clint. I'm probably becoming less racist then, that's good. You look like you live in San Antonio and you treat it like the Valley in Boogie Nights and you just make fat people fuck each other on camera. Yeah, but you get in people's faces, you're like, I take this fucking seriously.

Do not fuck with me, Jack, because I gave you a shot here. You're an our tour. Him with the big megaphone. Two ginormous people slamming. In a Whataburger parking lot in San Antonio, you're outside of a Spurs game with a big net. Just capturing people, forcing them to fuck on camera

Yeah, right. How's the back buddy? God damn it? This fucking thing is bad. I'm going to a guy. I'm gonna figure it out I know it's just never it's been like what three weeks now or so yeah, I've been working out though. I Went to GameStop Is it safe to work out with your bag? No no it's not at all. I can't do anything I can't really breathe and I get winded very easily. But there's like a stabbing through the back of my lung and a lot of pain in my lower back

and I have a lot of pain in my foot. You found out you had scoliosis in your lower back. Yeah, I got x-rays done. But a lot of people have scoliosis, so I need to figure out if I have arthritis of the spine or something, because something weird is going on. I think you need to like wear a lift in one shoe to like try to hope to even out Yeah, do you think do you think it could be Gelman possibly it could be Israel? Yeah, I'm paranoid enough I've thought like you really did I get hit like did they put something in my water?

Yeah, I sneak in the back and put yeah some drops in were you put some drops in the air conditioning unit or something. Were you at the mall staring at a really fat guy eat a sundae like it was a bug zapper? And a massage agent walked up behind you and stuck a little needle in your spine that's making it grow to the left. No, I've been looking for the Lego Lord of the Rings game because I want to play it on Xbox.

And at the mall, I couldn't even walk. I was walking through the food court all fucked up. I couldn't breathe. Yeah, you gotta stay home. It's still funny, you're like massively fucked up and you're somehow winding up at the food court of the mall. Wait, by the way, you know how hell is it

is to find parking? So Ben has a horrible back. He's wincing and screaming in the parking lot. And spinning the wheel as he's going higher up. Spinning the wheel, he's going higher up. Spinning the wheel. Standing outside of a Panda Express inside the mall. He's got ropes tied to his steering wheel

so he could pull it back and forth. I was really depressed and I hadn't talked to anybody in two days, so I thought it'd be good to leave the house because then I could park on the third floor of the Topanga Mall, take the elevator down, go to the GameStop. But by the time I got to the GameStop. I was all fucked up I couldn't do it

I thought it'd be good for me to like give myself a little challenge to go get the Lego game right and then come back and also Compare yourself to other people's backs and GameStop and feel like you're doing a little bit better You're like I'm all fucked up and there was there's a human spider that just crawled in the GameStop on all fours Yeah, a guys whose legs been backwards just walked in the GameStop. Why is GameStop even still around? Isn't everybody just buy games on their place? Because I think with Gremlin because of the GameStop thing. The shorting.

The short, yeah. I went to Game Dude in North Hollywood and they hooked me up. I got the Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King. I got the two towers. Oh, the original ones for the Xbox. Those games were amazing. The hack and slash. The one we played back in the day, like the PS2 Lord of the Rings the return of the king I got the two towers Oh the original for the Xbox games were amazing Yeah, the hack and slash the one we played back in the day like the ps2 or the rings game those games I gave you that was a good great games great games got the Lego or the rings game

But yeah, I'm just trying to like game at night like stand in front of TV and try to game Yeah, and trying to stand like keep it yeah to like help yourself Well know that my foot starts hurting really bad so I try to sit down and then that starts hurting so then I get up Can you lay down flat or does that hurt that hurts too so what I do when I go down whatever? This is all boring. I don't want to sound like a victim you need a That's the last thing I want to do I'm gonna figure it out. I have something going on I don't know what it is. I can't breathe you know what we need to do We need to put you in a big a big tube full of goo like you're in a cure or something

You're gonna like an anime have you just floating there Have you like gotten like a chiropractor like actually do all that bullshit where they snap everything? Yeah, I think I went to a guy. I think he made everything a lot worse What a massage help but yes a deep tissue massage would help but the thing I really need to do is go to a Rheumatologist I got to go to my primary care health provider. I got to go to a rheumatologist I need them to draw blood. I need to figure out what's going on with me. Like as I'm talking right now,

there's a knife pushing on the back, like through, like into my lung. And if I cough, it feels like it shoves out my chest, like the thing from Alien. God damn it. Laughing too hard even hurts. Oh man. And you've been like this for three weeks,

not like a second of relief. No, four, this is like week four. Week four, yeah, not a second of relief. This is week four. Week four, yeah, not a second of relief. Muscle spasms have stopped. Yeah. It's weird, did your back hurt in the past, or did this just like, that one night just come? I've always walked like this, I don't know.

But did you have a lot of pain? Yeah, I'm always understanding now, I've always had acute pain, but I've always just kind of brushed it off, especially in the morning, that kind of would just gradually go away. Right, but you went dad mode. I guess, I don't know man.

I don't know what's going on with me. I gotta get my breathing fixed though. I know, it's brutal. That's fucked up. That's the worst part is you don't really know what's going on too. No, I have no idea. When you're talking about autoimmune disorders,

I'm like what the fuck? That's like ALS. Lou Gehr fat racist disease. I pretty much have every symptom of ankylosis, spondylitis, but that's all just self-diagnosed stuff. What is that? That sounds like some sort of squid ink pasta. They call it AS. It's arthritis of the spine.

No you don't. You don't do enough. How? It just happens to people. Just cause you're so big? No. Tall, not fat, like tall. It's just a gene, Devin.

It's just a gene. It's not because I was just a lazy big fat fucker at McDonald's. It's gene. It's a gene, Larry. It's in the stars. Larry, it's the gene. This wasn't my fault. I did nothing wrong.

Larry, the genes. Oh man, I don't know. I'm hoping I don't think that's it. I think you just have a thing you need adjusted. I think you've been walking a certain way your entire life. It could be, you could have been loading a gun every day

for 20 years and it just all just fired. You're still recovering from them fixing your back. Did they not put five ribs back in place? I don't think they fixed it. I think chiropractors are like fake. They kind of are. It's a little bit of a stereotype. I think he made it worse.

Some of them I think are okay. It depends. I think the only thing I benefited from was him deeply massaging my tissue muscles and trying to get the nodules out in the Because they were big hard things like stacks of it felt like stacks of nickels that they were trying to get out in my Different spots and they shot lidocaine into me and almost passed out and I was like, is that normal and they go no I mean he laid me down was your chiropractor in a mall

Did he have his own clinic? Really? Yeah. Well that's okay. They have to take any office space they can get, because it is a pseudoscience. They kill people like all the time. They like break people's necks. They just get locked in. I've seen clips of like old people getting adjustments and they start screaming in pain. And the chiropractor has to be like, that's just the procedure doing its job. And they just push their neck

and they go, oh my god, fuck! And they go, that's a good sign. A few years ago, though, I started developing psoriasis on my legs. Autonome, yeah. So that started happening, and then I have all the other symptoms pretty much that I've had off and on. Like sometimes my vision gets very milky and kind of blurry and I have to like blink a bunch to make that go away. And that's a symptom of this AS thing?

Yeah. Oh, wait. Fuck. What do they say about this thing? I don't know. What is there to do about it? I got to go to a rheumatologist and give them a bunch of money and then they, you know, then they tell me when I'm gonna die, I guess.

I don't know. Or maybe it's cancer, I really don't know. It's not cancer. It's not cancer. It's not cancer. It's not cancer. Stop. Why can't I breathe?

Don't think that way. Why can't I breathe? And don't say Taco Bell or McDonald's. No, I'm not. I was gonna say George Floyd. Yeah. Dude, it's the curse of Floyd. I think you've made fun of George Floyd so much that Like a curse of the mummy you're turning into him. Yeah, you have a tiny little chauvin knee on your neck

You're gonna feel like shit for eight years and 44 months Yeah, you're on you have like a Moses Jones in your body, but the the germ cops are just killing every black Devon do you have an Xbox by the way no I need go get I was gonna get a PlayStation 5 when the new GTA yeah Oh Yeah, yeah, that's the only game. I care to play. I don't have any of the new consoles But that's not coming out for like two years though. Yeah I'm reading Lord of the Rings right now. It kicks ass and by the way, so what I've been getting I've been watching videos about elephants Mm-hmm. That's what I was trying to incredible. They mourn their loved ones. They're better than humans They're up there with whales. Yeah, they're incredible. They're better. I'm a big elephant guy. I watch elephants a lot. Do you really? I love elephants. I didn't know you loved elephants like I did.

I love elephants. I love donkeys to donkeys are really cool and smart. Yeah, donkeys are smart. Donkeys are like sleeper hits really in the in the horse like community. Donkeys are like cool as shit. Like real oh geez. No, they're like they just suck it up. They're like the Tim Duncan of like horses. They just fucking work there. They're like the Tim Duncan of like horses. They just fucking work there They just are silence fundamental killers just put the fucking canteens on my back

And we will we can walk anywhere you want buddy. Yeah walk me I yeah, I can walk places horses can't because they're brittle thin legs. Yes, but donkeys are like cynical You know they like you could tell they're probably making some jokes, like in their head, they're like, oh my god, yeah, we really need to go the long way. Yeah, they're lunch pail guys, though. Yeah, they are. They're like Rodman.

Exactly, you could find donkeys outside of a fucking gas station at 5 a.m. with like 70 ounce Dr. Peppers and Takis, and they're just starting their day. And they make America run. Donkeys are really cool, elephants are fantastic. Yeah, elephants mourn their dead ones. make America run. Donkeys are really cool. Elephants are fantastic. Yeah. Elephants. Elephants mourn their

dead ones like in such an unbelievable level. Better than humans. They like go around in a circle and they they they they they they're trunks. They love their who they they love their people.

You know who they hate though. They hate the Asians and they're killing them by the hundred are Asians are killing elephants No, I thought it was a no the elephants are protected now in Thailand and now they're getting their revenge because Thai people kept crashing them They do right then they ride them yeah, well if you get uber in Thailand, it's an elephant pulls up With a tiny little time and he goes you get on they got like 4,500 of these fuckers now in Thailand. They're protected Yeah, so now they're getting their revenge you said yeah, so here's what they did in Thailand they deforested a lot of where the elephants lived yeah, and Which was pretty fucked up, and then they only stopped actually because there were so much floods

It was killing everybody because obviously the trees and everything yeah stops the water from right deforestation of course Yeah, so then they had to stop and they're trying to get the trees to come back And then they were like you can't kill the elephants anymore The problem is is people have these crops like these wheat crops, or it's like sorghum and stuff. I'm not sure, like sugar cane. They have a weird plant you chew called like bing pow. And they're like, if a bing crop, if there's a bite on the bing pow crop, we'll all die.

Well the elephants come and they'll destroy a family's crop and they're not allowed to shoot them or do anything. And it's their whole like yearly income is it just gone They have to watch and the elephant like gloating about it is he like real but like a dick Yes, like he walks up and he like hits their little rice hat off and he goes do something They are and they'll go into town and they'll kill hundreds of people. Yes They have I mean obviously the whole thing, elephant memory. They do have insane memories. They're just.

For people. God, they ride or die for their elephants. There was that elephant, oh sorry, I'm cutting you off. The lady. The lady killed this elephant's daughter or something. This poacher lady. This poacher, killed this elephant's daughter. This elephant remembered.

It found out where the fucking funeral this woman killed the lady They killed it killed the lady. It found out killed the lady then then it killed Okay, yeah, it killed the lady then it showed up to her fucking funeral and stomped on her casket Like five days five days later Like the elephant like the elephant got a newspaper and found the funeral notice, like hey, at this church, and then the elephant showed up and was like, fuck you again, and flattened her body even more. Flattened her dead body.

While her whole family watched, the elephant was like, flattened and then pissed on her and then just walked away. And then God sent her to hell for sure. Yeah, and then God was like, you got fucking, you got raped by an elephant foot, you're going to hell. You bitch. I can't believe people kill an elephant foot. You're going to hell. You bitch. I can't believe people kill an elephant.

That's insane to me. That you can take that big of a life. For nothing. For nothing. So you can make your little dick pill soup or whatever you make out of it. I don't even know what they do with them. For your little tusk.

They're amazing animals. You killed the animal equivalent of 900 cats. Like in terms of size and weight. Yeah. It seems incredible to me. Insane. Check this out. Can we play 60 minutes?

I think we can. Yeah, yeah, it's news. It's news. Cool, here we go. Check this shit out. This is awesome. The elephant incursions, something he's desperate to stop.

Is that weed? Is that weed field? Every night he climbs. No, no, it's like sugar cane or something. They sit. There's a watchtower to look over his crops. Is that weed? Is that weed fields? Every night he finds- No, no, it's like sugar cane or something. I have to- He climbs a watchtower to look over his crops. He controls the edge of his- I also love when they click on,

when you're watching a video of, it's in the middle of Thailand and the guy's wearing a Quicksilver shirt. Yeah. Yeah, he looks like he's from Oceanside. Yeah, that's really funny to me. He's wearing a Huntington Beach, California shirt. Yeah, he's wearing a Santa Fe is for lovers.

He's wearing a Joe's Crab Shack shirt like a Santa Fe is for lovers He's wearing a Joe's crab check so Santa Fe is for lovers And his name is being pinged flashing a light from his truck or throwing firecrackers to try and scare them So they you know the Asians love their firecrackers. They want to kill. Yeah, they so they're doing everything they can they're doing all their Asian tricks They're going to own firecrackers. They're going to United style. Yeah, they're doing everything they can. They're doing all their Asian tricks. They're going firecrackers, boogie night style. They're doing everything, they're squatting. Smoking cigarettes at the elephants. They're doing every move they have in the playbook. Every Asian move they have.

Waving a long ashy cigarette at an elephant. See if they can scare him away. Wait, that seems like it could be dangerous chasing an elephant. It's very dangerous, but I have to do it. Otherwise, they will damage all my crops. What other kind of damage have you seen the elephants do in the village? They damage homes and cars. Three people have been killed recently by elephants in my home including my uncle

Like when you back up over a wiener dog, yeah like like casino they popped his eyeball his uncle was killed But like Phil Leotardo by an elephant Man our wives are all objectively better than that Elven pops my uncle's head. That's so funny. I started crying laughing. Dude, yeah. I started crying laughing. That elephant killed his uncle.

And you're right. He sees that elephant walking around. He can't do a fucking thing. No. No, he can't do shit. They're protected. So he'll go to jail. So then you got to check out this guy.

OK. So obviously. Hell yeah. Look out this guy, okay, so obviously Hell yeah, so I want to hold on. I want to be there weird trucks. There's stupid weird trucks. They drove I'm going back to the wide shot These guys so Thailand we all know Mm-hmm the types of people that want to go to Thailand or white. Yeah, what about? the Scientists that want to go to Thailand and study elephants, you want to see this sick fox just leading the research on elephants?

You want to see this sick piece of shit? They're just fucking up trucks. I wish we had a simple answer to that question. There are a lot of different ways to do this. One is to focus on the people. Can we find different crops for them to plant that maybe the elephants aren't attracted to? There's a little, there's a ladyboy brothel in Bangkok

where he walks in, they say, El Blanca Diablo. I know that's not their language. But they say El Blanca Diablo. They go white devils here. They go El Blanca Diablo. They call him White Fury. And there's something about the blue glasses as well. There's something new here.

Yeah, the round, yeah, the fact that they kind of mix colors. The fact that his face kind of looks like it's been punched in a little bit in the middle. His DNC glasses. So they bring this guy in to try and bring, how are we gonna solve this? We can't kill the elephants.

However, the elephants are, they're like Al-Qaeda. They're like ISIS. They're doing 9-11. They're burning buildings down. They stomp over homes and kill families. Like tornadoes. So what are you gonna do? You can't kill them.

You can't shoot them, right? What do you do? What do you do? We find ways to set up more permanent barriers. But what we're trying to do that I think is unique is focusing on the elephant, right? If you imagine that elephant pulls a gun out with its trotter just drops it like a fucking mob that might inform the development of new strategies that are targeted at

specific personality traits, certain behavioral traits that these elephants are exhibiting that might be better or stronger long-term solutions that would prevent elephants from coming into practice. When we come back, we'll learn how Josh Plotnick and his research team are coping with something called... When we come back, we'll show you some funny videos from ladyboys getting their heads exploded.

Why do I always want women like this to be like, and now, remove your pants, I'm going to give you a hand job. Next on 60 Minutes, I'm gonna show my big fat tits and you're gonna jerk off from me like a good boy. It is the unfortunate thing of any mildly attractive woman on TV, you're just like, listen lady, no respect, just tell me to jerk it. Just do a countdown for me.

Do a countdown. I'm ready. Start at 10. Start at 10 and tell me, and go slow. Tell me if I don't come in time, you're disappointed in me. She's like, I've interviewed over 13 world leaders and we're like, I don't care lady, tell me to jack off.

She's met with Kim Jong Un. She's got balls of steel. We have no respect. She's put her life directly in danger for journalism. Sorry, you look kind of good. You have kind of a vague mother vibe, so you gotta tell me how to jack off. You know what I wanna see now before we leave,

is I wanna see if there's any videos of elephants killing, I said them. Them. Elephants killing them. Like it knows you mean Thai people. Because I meant Thai people. Thai. Thai, okay.

Killing Thai people. Thai. Thai, okay. Killing Thai people. There we go. That's a monkey doing sit-ups. Yeah, they stopped trucks to steal sugarcane, which is badass. There was one, I saw an elephant killed a, oh, there, moments before. Oh, wow. They're also horny.

Like, they like, they like took, they take their trunks and they'll just like put their trunk up like a woman's pussy or like, like, like tits. Really? Yeah. Oh yeah, like put their trunk up like a woman's pussy or like like Yeah tits Really? Yeah. No. Yeah, they do all the time all the time So this video an elephant is charging at a US Taurus and is it kills the Taurus? Yeah good Look, he just goes right over trees fuck dude And then he's down. He died a second later. Wow. How do you think that elephant did it?

I think it just jumped up and waited on it. Yeah, it just hits one of its feet. They're quick big fox. Look at these bigger. This is a tea garden. It's like big fat guys who can do backflips. It's awesome. Dude, they're awesome. I know they do bits too. I've seen videos where like a guy with a hat is interviewing an elephant and the elephant grabs his hat with the trunk and then puts it in his mouth like it's gone, and then pulls it back out, puts it on its head.

Oh, look at him fall. Rampaging elephants kill three in a temple. That's kind of funny. That's us. I gotta say, you brought that on yourself. That's us. You tried to have a big ceremony, and they went insane.

You tried to dress an elephant like Shakira. They went insane. They went insane. Oh my God, they're destroying everybody. Sorry, elephant doesn't care about your six-armed blue god. It's going to kill you. You swagged at this elephant, then it's gonna stomp you to death. Wow, look at them go.

It's literally killing people. It's killing people. It's killing people. In this video that we're watching. It's killing people. It's killing people. It's killing people. It's killing people. In this video that we're watching. That's awesome. Wow. Yeah, I just thought they were beautiful.

Yeah, they go like, you want my tusk so bad? Here, here it is right in your chest. Oh, fuck. Here, yeah. Sell my tusk. No, yeah. Sell my tusk in the afterlife. Sell it when it pierces your heart.

Sell it. Sell my tusk in the afterlife, bitch. Take the tusk out of your asshole and sell it on the black market, fag. Leave them alone. You sit in your hut and make some Tom Kakei soup and shut the fuck up. Stop acting like we're horses.

We could kill you. We're giant monsters. We're happy monsters. Make your weird shrimp and chicken soup. You ever seen anything that looks, yeah, put the mushrooms in the fucking soup that kind of look like a different type of Asian person. Serve it in like an upside down cake mold that's on fire.

Just make your sticky rice, put a mango in it, and some curry and shut the fuck up. Stop attacking me, I'm fucking 13 feet tall, and I will decimate your fucking village. Put some cashews in your sticky rice and shut up Yeah, where they get those little shrimp by the way those little fuzzles Oh manny shrimp is this cup of noodle is that Jap or is that is that big bunnies? Is that Bing Bong is that Jap or is that Thai?

Hmm. I think I don't know what it is. I think it's Japanese. I think it's Japanese as well cup of noodle is Japanese I believe so. Oh, no, not well cup of noodle is Japanese. I believe so Or no not that cup of noodle. It's the other one you should whatever I mean how much you want to bet cup of noodle was developed in, Ohio Yeah, I think it's I think cup of noodles the American version you're thinking of like ramen cups Instant noodle cup how can I think of something? I've never seen Jace. I mean ramen is Japanese. Yeah ramen Japanese ramen famous Japanese ramen famous Japanese Roman So really Italians and Japanese are the only people that have like kind of owned the market on noodles, huh? Well, yeah, the Italians stole them from the Japanese. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was developed in 1971 in Japan

Cup cup noodles, it's actually just called cup noodles Cup noodles originally known as cup-o noodles. They shortened it to cup. Yeah. Cup noodles, o noodles was too confusing for the American public. I guess so. If you eat those too much, your kidneys shut down. Did you know that Trevor Moore,

the late Trevor Moore, one of the great, one of the goats of comedy, he said in an interview that in college, all he ate every day, he smoked cigarettes and ate ramen, and he went to the doctor because he had a hole in his thigh that was developed like a cavern. His doctor said he was so, he lacked nourishment,

and so his body started eating this part of his muscle. His leg was still fucked up for the rest of his life. His body didn't have protein for like two years. Mm-hmm. Something like that. Just sodium and carbs. Yeah. I guess so.

And cigarettes. Menthol. Yeah. It's like, what's that thing? Rabbit starve, what do they call it? Where guys on the planes, they'd eat nothing but rabbit, but they'd have no fat and they'd starve to death. Yeah, you kind of go into ketosis that kills you.

Yeah. It starts eating your brain and shit. Yeah. Because you have no fat and they'd starve to death. Yeah, you kind of go into ketosis that kills you. Yeah, it's like eating your brain and shit. Yeah. Because you have no fat. By the way, Porn went out for you today because I found out the news about the vape. Are you buying this news about the vape? What's that? Oh, there's this big article going around

that the vape is way more harmful for you than cigarettes. Much worse than cigarettes. And you're getting exposed to lead and like, did you see this, Chase? Oh yeah, I saw it. What's this article I don't I buy them when I get too drunk but I don't I don't I'm not a I'm not a technical vape smoker I mean I you know if I'm drunk I take my friends or whatever but like I don't I'm not a vape user for the most part yeah I was it this was it this you from UC Davis, Jace? I believe so, yes.

Hmm. Disposable e-cigarettes more toxic than traditional cigarettes, according to a... Yeah, I don't buy that. That's probably made by cigarettes. Good counter, I'm buying that. Close, case closed. Yeah, obviously they're not good for you.

I never thought that. They, well look, Mondami's on the case here. Zoran. Zoran, he's got, he's putting a box cutter into the vape. He won't put gloves on to eat food with his hands, but he'll put gloves on to test the vape out. Interesting. Fucking Commie.

Commie piece of shit. Commie vote Cuomo. We're gonna get you, you fucking terrorist. If you live in New York, vote Cuomo. You think you're gonna take over my city? I'm voting for the guy with the wacky hat. I'm voting for the old retard with the wacky hat. The guy with the boot on his hand? I'm voting for the guy with the wacky hat. I'm voting for the old retard with the wacky hat. The guy with the boot on his head?

I'm voting for the guardian angel. I'm voting for the 80 year old guardian angel that still sits on the subway as he's looking for black guys with the 1970s Afros to shoot in the head. I'm voting for the Bernard Getz guy. We're gonna get to Zoran in a second, by the way, because did you see the Indian video he did?

No. Oh, I can't wait to show you this. I saw the video of him eating with his hands in the park and it kind of pissed me the fuck off. Eating rice with his hands. It really upset me. Interesting, you have no response to this vape thing, you don't care at all.

I don't give a shit. I don't, I'm not. You're so scared to die though. I don't have like a vape in my pocket. Like, I know you guys have seen me occasionally, but it's usually after like a long weekend and like Joey leaves his vape and then I just have it and then I just throw it away.

I saw one on your kitchen counter when I was getting a spin drift. Yeah, that's Joey left that. But no, yeah, that's bad. I definitely, when I'm drunk, I do hit them and not think about anything, but I still don't think for, I don't think there's a chance they're as bad as a cigarette. Just smoke sex.

I don't think there's a chance there's a It's impossible there's bad as cigarettes, it's got to be impossible For think about it maybe maybe mix it up Should I go back and forth? Yeah for every vape you hit smoke a cigarette. I'm really fine with like loose season shit. I Don't really care They are great though when you're drunk and you grab somebody's vape. Yeah, it rules. Zoran Mamdami posts Indian men cosplaying Jews

spitting dreidels and lighting the menorah. This is from Stop Anti-Semitism. This is real? Wait, this is a real video? Yeah, he used to shoot like, in college he shot like Doss Raceless videos. I guess he thought he was Lil Dicky at one point. He was, Ben, he's trying to be Doss Raceless. Kind of Lin-Manuel Miranda-y. So that's him? Yeah, in the corner. He also did our rap videos back in the day. I mean this is just gonna like make the people that already like him love him more.

This ain't doing any bad for him. You know it is funny, to stop anti-semitism guys are like he made fun of Judaism. We're like great, thank you. Awesome. Yeah, he made fun of Judaism. And we're like, great, thank you. Yeah, they don't. Awesome. Yeah, well, he thinks we look funny. No, I mean, they do that every time. They're like, did you see this tweet from 2013

where he called Obama a war criminal? And they're like, yes, that's why I'm voting for him. Moron, you idiot. You idiot. You person, you 95-year-old person who's lived in New York their entire life and has never had any original thought outside of New York fuckin' city.

You shoulda seen this place in 77, it was fuckin' crazy. People really hate him. I've been watching a lot of in the street videos where they just ask New Yorkers what they think. It's all the tips, the young people all love him and everybody above fuckin' 40 is like, he's a fuckin' terrorist, He wants to ruin our city. I mean it is what it is, I don't know.

Who's right though? I don't know. Who's right, who's wrong? Who's left behind? I think he could win because all the other candidates are massive retards. You remember when everyone used to say you gotta vote local, that's the most important?

Yeah. Now I go the other way. Now I say that's the least important. Say vote macro. Because it's the smallest thing. Now I think the small votes don't mean say that's the least important because it's the smallest thing. Now I think the small votes don't mean anything at all. Vote big. Vote big.

Vote macro. Obviously vote big. Why would you just vote small? Right. You know what I mean? Just like if your house is falling to the ground, you wouldn't just obsess over the carpet and the wallpaper. You'd focus on the foundation, right?

Exactly. Thank you, Devon. That is a brilliant point. You gotta go with your roof and your door first. You said it. I've just said it. Thank you you Devon. It's a brilliant point. You gotta go with your roof and your door first. You said it. I've just said it. I'm killing it right now on this point. Devon said it. Thank you Devon. Very good. It's time to vote big fuck local elections. Just vote in the big one. If you want to vote just vote in the big one.

You gotta vote big. Don't get involved in the mayor. Exactly. Come on. And we already won, we voted for Trump and that's what we got. Exactly, now we got alligator Alcatraz, we're doing great. We bombed Iran, it's great. Exactly, we have alligator Alcatraz. Palantar owns little chips in your spine, it's great.

Yeah, I don't know. I think he's gonna win though, I think it's gonna be like, cause we can't get back, it's gonna be like the Me Too movement with Trump, like they couldn be like the me to a movement with Trump like like like they couldn't get Trump So they just ruined all of our art. Yeah, so now that they can't get Trump They're gonna vote so Ron and and he might be fine. I don't fucking know. He seems hip enough Yeah, I don't know. I think legitimately the DNC will try as hard as they possibly can to destroy him

They'll destroy him. I mean the big the BB the big beautiful bill. They like barely gave a shit about that They're like, there's a fucking dirty mazzi running for mayor. So they'll let kooma win or something Yeah, there was that black retarded guy who was mayor of New York Eric Adams. He's still mayor It's like it's like you have like yeah, I'm a mayor Did anything like did the World Trade Center fall like catch on fire nothing happened? He was just going around town like Ja Rule every day, just saying stupid shit. He was like funny, I think. He was just like the funny black mayor.

It's like the mayor, it's like he's the- Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter, right? They're not doing anything. Come on, it's the mayor. But everyone's afraid Zoran will like make it like, you know, way worse. Yeah.

Like there'll be just like- Make an era. There'll just be like homeless psychopaths, oh my god, Lena Donovan. Dude, is that really her? Is that really her? I couldn't wait to show this to Devin. Ben, that's not AI. There'll just be like homeless psychopath. Oh my god That's not AI I couldn't wait to show this to you guys oh my god, this is actually what she looks like Oh my god. God damn it Lena Jesus Christ Just like I also saw industrial light of magic design turn a computer. I Saw a picture earlier today of her legs. She has some horrible skin thing. She has like elephant skin.

Oh my God, she looks huge. Wait, let me clean my glasses. Are we still watching the 60 Minutes Elephant documentary? She's killing Thai people. She goes to Thailand, they're shooting at her. Throwing firecrackers at her. They're like, Lena Dunham keeps eating our crops. My family's going to die.

Dude, it's also really mean to shoot her vertical like this. She looks like she can't fit. Oh, you should shoot her from directly above her head. She doesn't fit. So that you just see a circle. Yeah, and an anamorphic lens. Exactly, yeah. She was air.

You see the entire world in a circle. She was airlifted into this interview. She doesn't even sound like Lena either. Do you think this is like a hot dating tip for people listening that they need to work on a super serious project with their boyfriend? Yeah, immediately second date, asked to go into business, asked us to be like we're going on Shark Tank together.

I do think working with your spouse or significant other, it can be complicated. She looks like she runs a community. Like she looks like the leader of a community that's probably not doing too well. But she looks like people have to climb up a mountain and she just sits plopped on top of it. Plopped on top of it.

She runs North Korea. Yeah. This is, oh man, cause she's so talented and nuts, but good God she looks like shit. Yeah, that, this is oh man because she's so talented and nuts, but good god. She looks like shit Yeah, that's that's very shocking. I thought that was a face up that makes me think being fat is not people's fault Actually now it's a good on all that's got to be a Like that's immense sadness and that's like something's wrong with her glands. It's an issue. No she eats Sadness and that's like something's wrong with her glands. It's an issue. No she eats

She puts work the whole show girls is like cuz she's constantly nervously. Yeah, you're disrespecting her work. She eats. Yeah, she eats She goes she rolls up to Louby's. I mean look at the look at the thing that like ties her dress together It's like it's about the snap That's really bad. Look. I don't know why she has a rope around her belly. Well, it's cuz it's about to snap. That's really bad look I don't know why she has a rope around her belly. Well it's cuz a butcher put it around. Like you're twining a rose. Yeah exactly. Yeah he stuck a toothpick in her to see if she's full cooked. Yeah she's going in a crock-bot right after this. Good God Lena. Yeah that's crazy. Actually I haven't seen a picture of her in like four years. I had no idea. No, she's been fat.

She's been fat for like real fat. I didn't know that. She's always fat. No, she's real fat. This is Brando fat. Like this is crazy. In her early 30s, right? She's still young.

This is like your friends get together like, I mean, should we say something? Yeah. I don't wanna be mean, but she's dying. This is bad. I mean, I could ask a grok no grok's woke yeah she's beautiful why is why is Lena Dunham so fat rock says just a second boiling boiling a tree just a second, boiling, boiling a tree, just a second.

Lena Dunham's weight has been a topic of public discussion, often tied to her openness about health, struggles, and body image. Dunham has been diagnosed with Ehlers-Donlos syndrome, a connective tissue disorder and endometriosis, which led to a hysterectomy and ovary removal. Oh, that's sad. These conditions and surgeries can disrupt hormonal balance, potentially contribute to weight gain.

I mean, that's all cute, but that's, no, come on, you're eating like a fucking pig. You're fucking, you're going around Crown Heights every day, eating all the Jamaican food on the street. But Devon, it says she has OCD. It is, no, they now have new diseases where they go like, I'm a fat pig disease. Like, for these Brooklyn DSA members

to feel better about themselves. They have like, I'm tired disease, I'm a worthless fag disease. And they just tell their family at dinner and then they wonder why their family hates them and votes for Trump. The doctor says I have fat greedy pig disorder, FGPD. And feed me from this trough. Yeah. I only eat from troughs now. I have fat greedy pig disorder. FGPD. And feed me from this trough.

Yeah. I only eat from troughs now. I have fat narcissist disorder. And once again, I'll always say this, I respect the hell out of Lena Dunham. I still gotta go back and revisit Girls. Girls is an all time show, she's great in it. The only thing you have to look past

is that she's constantly getting naked in it. Oh, it says she's gained an insane amount of weight because since 2021 she achieved sobriety it says okay. Oh Right, okay, maybe she needs to start. Yeah, she traded the you know she traded booze for maple syrup. I guess that's better This is the funny thing is some people quit drinking and they find way worse things. Yeah, you get addicted to like Dr. Pepper. Turning in the mountains. I will say, when you're drinking, you weren't eating like a bunch of, you know. Yeah. You know, Grand Slams.

You weren't eating something called the Grand Slam at eight in the morning. Right. Because you were still sleeping. Every food Lena, all the food Lena Dunham eats has a mascot. There's a character on the front of it. She's like, I'm eating Tony the Tiger today. Or I'm eating Mr. Taki today.

Most of her vitamins come from Rudy Tooties, fresh and fruity. We need to get out of here. Oh, poor Lena. Poor Lena. Yeah, no, but Devon, let him know, let him know that you love her work, you're a big fan. I mean, you're chomping at the bit to work with her.

She's finished now. You see him, how he's angling? I would have killed. He's trying to distance himself from me and you. You guys are, you're retarded, man. You would have killed to be in Girls. Girls was a fantastic show. It was a, it was a seminal show.

Buddy, did you wrap this flag up at night and sleep in it Patron calm slash living party For bonus episodes by the way, we haven't been plugging the dates. We've totally forgot. We're going on the road Yeah, we're going on the road July We haven't been plugging the dates. We've totally forgot we're going on the road. Yeah, we're going on the road at the end of July. I totally forgot. Like the 22nd? 22nd to the 27th or whatever.

We're doing Seattle, Portland. I've just been in pain. I forgot what we're doing. San Francisco. And that's it. And that's it. Those are the ones coming up. And then in September, we're gonna do more.

And I think those ticket links aren't up, but it's gonna be like Dallas and something else. And I think Phoenix, I think Denver. Go to liveandparty I think that those ticket links are not but it's gonna be like Dallas and something else and Go to live in party dot life for the ticket links Yes, if you live in those cities or near enough that you want to go there We got to keep promoting those we will we are we got a cool program. We're really all bad at promoting Now we're funny whoever's coming out Podcast they get it out of the way up top.

They're constantly telling you. Yeah, they're not funny. Not funny! Not funny! Promote your dates! Not funny! Yeah. But yeah, liveinparty.life for that. And did you guys have

anything else? No, that's good. I don't think we forget. Oh, and there's also merch. We forgot. is back merch. Yeah, and it's it's always staying up now printing on it It's been up. It'll be forever. Yeah, it's always up. It's always up. Go get it or not Yeah, it's always up get it. God bless you guys right now. Love you. One for me, one for you One for me, one for you One for me One for you, one for me One for you, one for me One for you, one for me One for you, one for me Please don't go away, I'm radiant and maple Please don't go away, till morning comes around Please don't go away, while mine is on the table

Please don't go away, just lay your back down Now I don't know what I would do if you could have to leave My jealous heart is stiff inside and no dear on my sleeve Cause I could show again like you, such love and affection I don't want to make no spits, there ain't no election Please don't go away, I need to change your mind to stay Heart flops on the waves, I need to let me hear you say Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, Yeah! One for you, one for me

One for you, one for me One for you, one for me