lemonparty - 164: The First Church of Aoki

Episode Date: December 16, 2025

The First Church of Aoki | lemonparty 164 The keyboard breaks and the mouse splits in half but Ben pitches his new movie idea while chaos ensues.... Devan goes off on dog reassignment surgery, Jace protects children from the homeless of Los Angeles, Gubba Mud is up to her old homestead eggy tricks, and the boys praise Randy Rainbow in this holiday ep... this week on lemonparty. https://www.lemonparty.life/ https://hellofresh.com/lemon10FM https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/LEMON bonus episodes ⁠https://www.patreon.com/lemonparty⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One chicken, one, walk, chicken, chicken, whews. Chicken, one, chicken wings. One, one, chicken wings. Yeah, you like my outfit, don't even make the deal. I thought you said you had your girl on the light bill. Always in my face, talking listening. Girl, I ended up about some real for the cat-knack. You rag clean, but your gas take.

But your gas tank is on me Be stepping now they got no decent shoes on your feet That's just to feed it bro. You don't know what you're talking about In the face, there's no choice when the come out Hate to see you in the club You're bombing with a mug No one that you're bad with your boy you're nothing but a scrub

But he was with me That's when you treat hate it Cause when I got up on you in your bed near faith I showed it and I face drinking on the act Mouthful of clothes But your ass needs to be to Why would it make sense. Why would it make sense?

Hello. Hi. That's all. That's nice and juicy and full. That's nice and velvety. Nice and full. Surround sound. We're recording if you want to be funny.

If we want to be funny. No, fuck you. I'm waiting for you. I don't want to be funny ever. No, I'm boring right now. Fuck you. Yeah, fuck you. What are you looking for?

They're a remote for the TV. It's unbelievable what you did to this studio, single-handedly. There's so much trash. Now there's junk to milk everywhere. There's goat milk everywhere. Your desk does look like a shooting gallery on an old ranch. Yeah. Just bottles everywhere.

Oh, my God. God. There, wow. There it is. There he is. You haven't done it for a while. Your sign's not on, Ben. Now we're being funny. You have to put your sign on. Yeah, the sign's got to be on, man. People got to know what the show is. People got to know what does this turn it on? No, no, it's through an app called Govee. Oh, everything's through an app these days.

Yeah, they're all through apps, you know? You know? Your boarding pass. Your ID. Your dogs through a damn app these days. Everything's on a damn app. should turn on Devin's light too. Should we? Why? Okay. It's been too dark down here. It's like cut clips and stuff. Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, yeah. You decided to turn it off like three months ago. Like, oh yeah, that is crazy. That's crazy, right? I was looking

right at it like an idiot. You were really angry at everybody and you like turned off the lights. You were like, fuck them. We'll do it at the dark. Well, you did have, yeah. And your eyes did feel like they had big needles in them, too. Testing. That's right. That was the week you were dying. That actually sounds pretty good. But now the actual needles from acupuncture have brought you back to life. And you can see and you feel fine all the time. Yeah, and for some reason now I'm just...

I was listening to Musuga. What is that? Did just some metal band? Like a... Oh, really? One of those? Like a blood. Yeah.

I don't know. You really like that. I didn't know either. It's a completely new... Wait, you're really like that? I'm listening to songs called like Demented. No, it's every white guy. You're getting activated.

He is. Yeah. He's going to shoot up his own house. It's been lying dormant inside of you, but you actually really want to listen to people scream. Yeah. He's going to do a never-been kiss, but for just, like, being a freak at a high school. Yeah.

R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-I. What is? I don't understand how to get into that. I don't know. And I don't blame anybody, but I do look at you cock-eyed. I've tried. I'm not quite sure what's happening. When I used to lift a little bit, I would, like, put Slayer on.

I'd be like, this is, you know, this is fun. Yeah. I like getting pumped. But then, you know, you just play every song. You're like, this is the exact. It's like kind of the same. And then every single song is just that over and over and over again. And Mashuga, I believe, is a Jewish metal band, Ben.

Correct? I didn't know that. I think that's where they got the name from. I'm going to be sick. Musugia. Yeah, I mean, why would they be called Mushugga? Unless they were Jewish. This keyboard's not.

I guess it's out of batteries. The keyboard's not working? It seems it's off. Yeah. It's off. It's kilter. It's literally out of battery. I had so much stuff to show you guys, too.

Do you have me to go look for a AAA battery? Yeah, it's dead. Okay. Do you want to keep doing the shower? What about, oh, what about, okay, so I'm getting really into stocks and listening to metal, so how about a movie called The Big Shirt? Okay. And it's just a guy who just keeps getting really fat.

And he keeps having a vibe bigger shirt. He sits in an office all day and just watches gay porn and listens to the metal. Where's a really big shirt? His investors come in, they're like, you're at a 4X. If you get to a 5, the investor, I don't know if I can keep the investors on board. God damn it, I mean, there's a new Chinese buffet that opened across town. Let me listen to metal any Chinese food. Adam Carreidx, the big shirt.

The big shirt. And every 15 minutes, it cuts Samargo Robbie being like, I would really be. really won't fuck him now he's autistic and fat no thank you no thanks michael uh berry michael blueberry yeah oh there we go fucking freak perfect fucking freak ass perfect no you keep telling me to invest in uh international yeah you're trying to get me out of i care about this country too much yeah about the u.s of a i'm investing in Taiwanese superconductors now yeah oh oh devon So I only need one.

Thank you. So I was talking. I was pitching a movie to Jace called The Big Shirt. It's about a guy who just... What do you think? Should we make it? It's about a guy who just sees autistic and he just keeps getting fatter. Yeah, the company.

And they're like, our investors, you're up to a 5X. Yeah. You go to 6. Tracy Letts comes in. He's like, if you go to a 5X, the investors are out. And he just keeps pulling out his shirt. That's good. I could see Ben spending a month writing that.

The big shirt. The big shirt. It's a big shirt. It's funny, right? Yeah. And you're... There's big Kirkland shirts with a big pocket. Steve Carell walking out of a DXL and being like, sell it all.

You tell it all now. There's a bubble and he's talking about a guy's ass. There's a bubble. Sell all of our stock in broccoli. That's good. Buy fudge. I actually think this is really good. You tell your family you have to leave for a month to go, you need silence to work on it.

Yeah. And you go up to a cabin and check off and write the big shirt. the big shirt. Is it working? Did it help? It doesn't seem like it's working. No, I don't think it's connecting now. Hold on. It's blinking.

Now Ben is on the floor. You got to unscrew the flashlight, get the battery back in. Watching Ben go through, this is tragic. God, I just got back. I went to the Macy's in Glendale, and I might as well have been in the bar in Star Wars. But everybody has a fat ass. It was crazy. Oh, in Glendale.

Oh, yeah, yeah. The Armenians getting... Just bugs grabbing, just shiny. Everybody's a bug. Everybody's a bug. I know, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but I really did feel... I'm feeling a little sick, so I really...

I was walking around, just like... I know what you mean. Yeah. Yeah, no, and then they all go to that in and out down below in the parking lot. Yeah. They run that place. The Glendale Gallery is just a big family reunion.

Yeah, it truly is. Everyone's related over there. truly is I'm just trying to look at watches meanwhile you're really going to macy's looking at watches yeah I got to see if I like them first before I order them second hand from eBay from a guy in China Devin I've got to go see if I like the new Hamilton watch in person so I've got to talk to a Armenian guy when you put on a new watch every day you're like is the top does the time feel different I go my is this complete me am I fine I go this is the one this makes me feel do you have one for like every day of the week at this point I got your Monday your Tuesday

No, I just, I go by what I'm feeling. Some days I wear two. Some days I really fucking... You wear two watches. I really retarded up. I go two watches at once. Your device is ready to go. Hold on.

All right. Let's see you. Go put up Google Chrome. Okay. Brown bunnies. What's brown bunnies? It's a black porn site from the old days. I thought it was a Vincent Gallo fan page.

Ben Pullup Brown and Brown. Vincent Gallo. no no i'm kidding i'm kidding no that's that's black that's black pornography no these are actual bunnies yeah the you you just pulled up actual brown bunnies these are brown bunnies actually having sex that one that one's doing gaping it's wholesome stuff yeah a bunny testing chick a bunny doing goatee okay all right let's let's begin oh shit the mouse fell in half it just fell in half it broke in half? Are you kidding me? It did break. It just broke in half.

Oh, shit. I think it disconnected. Oh, my God. Wait, where'd the other top half of the mouse go? It went. It's so hard to tell with all the goat bottles, the goat milk bottles. What is happening here?

Flossing? I like flossing. There's like bits of toilet paper and shit. I got to keep my gums clean. I don't, because it's supposedly like gum disease causes... Yeah, all the bad. Yeah, heart, it's connected to your big toe, all that's, yeah. Yeah. Where could it have gone?

It's behind you. It's under your chair down there. It somehow flew far away from you. Oh, shit. It's all the way over there. See if it goes back together. And then I just, what if I just pull up a video of like a pig taking a shit? You pulled that. Finally. We can be professional. I had a lot of stuff to show you today. You pulled that a pig with a fade and you go, huh?

I think we could do some shit with that. Oh, do you want to play? I didn't think of this, but do you want to play the video of the lady confronting Louis at Book Soup or whatever the hell it is? Oh, you can. Is that funny? You can. We don't have to. Kind of bothered me.

We won't do it. Did that piss you off? A little bit. Just because she set up her phone and it's for views. And then, like, he's, he's doing a book reading to, like, 40 people. It was kind of one of those videos. It was one of those videos I kind of watched through my hands. I don't know.

what he's what did he say back i didn't even like really like fake sincere like thank you so much and you want to maybe get your camera oh he got her so he got her a little bit i forget her what's what was her name um i think that is her yeah that seems familiar alexis dionda comedian comediane that there it is oh she has multiple she's multiple videos with louis this is going to get interesting it's going to hit saucy okay very good here we go Last one, yeah. Thank you. Are you Alexis?

Yeah. Okay, Alex. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck you and you're stupid. Like you. Thank you, Alexis. Thank you, Alexis.

Thank you very much. Thank you. Oh. Fuck you and you're stupid. Like, even when you get somebody, they start. you get somebody they still do gerbil fish okay they got nothing yeah i think i got a side uh that's annoying kind of that's a little annoying he dealt with it he dealt with it i bet it already happened i bet jokes on her i bet he jerked off to that later to be honest yeah probably the embarrassment of that

the shame what if he's like just louis isn't like so pretentious now he's just like you're welcome if you need to jack off in front of co-workers do it because that's what you're feeling at the time That's the first time I saw Mort Saul, I thought the same thing. I'm doing that thing Comedians do when they turn 60, where they can just only talk about comedy reverentially. They can't really do it anymore. Here what I do to, I jack, I use my worst technique first, and then I build on that so I get stronger at my best technique.

And then by the end of the year, I have the greatest technique there is. I always tell Camines, you got to open with your balls. You jiggle your balls. Because then it's hard to follow. Hard to follow. No one expects you to open with your balls. Everybody wants to finish with their balls as they're coming, but you got to start with that to build yourself up.

Do you guys like, I mean, there's two paths, really, for a lot of online women. It's gerbilface. Sure. And then there's this right here. Remember this lady? I don't know who this lady is. Remember Guba. Guba Homestead?

That looks like that's her name. Guba Homestead. What? Okay, hold on. She looks like a type of fish you have to. sex with. She looks like a whore fish. Let me remind you guys very quickly who she is. She's this bitch

remember. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Growing up is realizing eggnog is more of a health food than a salad. Yeah. Remember she makes this face? Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah, like, yeah, she's being enlightened and just tastes the greatest thing. Like the worm. The worm that's in her brain

is very happy. She just ate that much eggnog for breakfast. Yeah. That type of face. Yeah. The worm that makes her dress like she's getting molested in a cult. Yeah, the handmade's tail outfit she's got on. Yeah, a woman who's like, can somebody please subjugate me already?

I'm a homesteader. So that's Gubba Homestead. And so what's this new one? Well, she just believes dragons are real. Is her first name Gubba? Because both. Yeah, well, yeah, it's Gubba homestead. She's a whole brand, Jays. There's millions of dollars behind her. She's like, she's like Gubba bomb shrimp.

I guess it is. I don't, I've never heard the term. How my name's Gubba. Gubba. What are you, what's your name and what do you do? Well, my name's Gaba, and I'm a retarded woman who stays at home and films it. She's a trad wife who drinks a milk. I think she has a lot of work done, which I do. It's not very, you're not a colonial woman.

If you have lip filler, right, that's a little strange. Yeah, the only way to get to homesteading and not look like something of a pioneer shot on the frontier is you've got to go through the clubs and get slutted out. And then after you're in a dumpster. after getting just Bukaki for 40 minutes you decide to become a homesteader that's what happens. Marfa, when you're done tending to the kids with consumption, remember

your injections. It's so hard for me to churn butter with these both arms. They're getting in the way. That would have, guys would have really loved that back then. Yeah. If you, we would have never left the farms if women had a huge That's the only reason you went to the city.

Whole, hole in the ceiling for a year. years. Three of your kids die in the winter because you just can't stop looking at her BBL. We'd still be 13 states. The French would own all the U.S. We'd just be like, sorry, Tyler Jefferson's like,

sorry, I was just jacking off. I was too busy to do anything. I got to say lip filler really does it for me. Really? Well, the thing they do to the lips is they want them to make, it's on a biological level, they look more hydrated. Do you know that's what it is? The

look filler. No, they look like they're better for sucking dick The whole image is to look like Men go and they're like, wow, I'd love that would be great around my dick Yeah, it looks like a big juicy pussy Her face looks like something you're supposed to put your penis inside They make their mouth into a parking spot for cock Yes

They make it into a desirable parking spot That's the entire thing You walk around all day and everyone goes That looks like a great place for my fucking dick If they could they would turn them out sideways And put a little lid on the top of them They might as well be a sign on her nose It says reserved for cocks

So you think it's hydrated, it's supple, it's wet, all the words for the DSL thing. I remember, I think Kylie Jenner had a thing years and years ago where she was like sell like a bottle cap that you would put in your mouth and like young girls were using this, like teenagers, sucking on it. And the thing was, I think it was like designed to give you, it was like burst capillaries in your lips. Yes, yeah. Because you're getting, you're getting like WC Fields nose in your lips though. It's like exploding capularies. and shit like that. I like it.

I'm not against it. I'm not against Botox. I'm not against the lip-tor. I mean, I like it. I guess. It is hot to me in a very specific way where it doesn't matter if this woman lives or dies. You know what I mean?

By that. Why? Because of the milk? No, no, no, no. Because she's just drinking a big cup of milk and talking about dinosaurs. I'm saying when her, when her cheeks look like a baboon's ass and her mouth looks like a pussy. I'm like, I could just fuck this woman

and then put her in a big paper shredder. Like, it doesn't matter. You like the emotional distance it gives you from. Yeah. It's a woman turning her. into an actual sex doll, an object, basically. Yeah, and that somehow is hot that they're like just giving up everything for that. Yeah, they're like, oh, this woman's so retired, she has no thoughts other than being fucked.

I hate it because you can't shove their head in the microwave anymore when you're angry. You know, they melt a little bit. So here's her talking about dinas. Is that a... Wouldn't that be great if that thing attacked her? Did you know in the 1936 Webster's... She drinking a mint jule-up? Well, that's a bunch of com.

She's doing this while a slave is hidden beneath the floor. It's a milk, julia. She's got a gigantic glass of a spermy, frothy, milky thing. So let me get this straight. You believe in dinosaurs, but you don't believe in dragons? Did you know in the 1936 Webster's dictionary, the word dragon was listed as a real creature, a huge serpent, just now rare. Not imaginary, not make believe, rare.

Now take a look at this. picture, burn it into your mind because I'm about to read something for my book in my collection. I love being so retarded that you're like, I use the dictionary from 1805. I use the dictionary from before my neighbor was a person legally.

The word penicillin is not in this day. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, when I look up hysteria, it's a disease women get that you should masturbate them until they calm down. You know, that's why the dildo was invented? 18 what? To calm women down? It was for when women had hysteria back in the day

doctors to calm them down would basically tickle their clit like flick their clit until they came and that was a cure for hysteria in women so the doctors were getting tired so they invented the dildo

in order to make the woman come because the doctor's hands were getting so sore from making these women calm all day long I think women do become hysterical to get a man's attention yeah so well there so it works that's where it comes from it worked in a way

they actually just need to get cracked and getting cracked is a good term i've been using a lot because it means a woman getting a very satisfying and intense orgasm it doesn't mean just getting fuck no it's like cracking your back you get opened up yeah yeah yeah in a good split split is not good split open is for you but cracked getting cracked yeah yeah women use this term they say they love getting cracked i just they'll go in tic-tac thing i just got freshly cracked and i'm feeling good freshly yeah okay i like it's like scientific It's, yeah, we could convince them of that. Because there's an egg up there.

Let me crack your pussy. You seem tired. You're being a bitch. You're being a bitch. Come over here. Let me crack your pussy. You're being mean to me, so let me really fuck your shit on. Can we learn about dragons for a second, guys?

Please, can we learn about dragons? Burn it into your mind because I'm about to read something from an old book in my collection. This is an account of Marco Polo's travels where he wrote about huge serpent. In this province are found snakes and great serpents of such vast size as to strike fear into those who see it. So this is my thing with these people is, like, we're supposed to believe that they're reading from books from like 300 years ago and sit around drinking milk and churn and butter and all this stuff. It's like, we know you're watching Netflix. We know you have Wi-Fi. We know you're scrolling in bed too just like us.

I don't believe anyone. This is just when the cameras are rolling. Yes, exactly. No. I don't believe anyone's reading or doing anything that's better for them. Nothing. No. She's checking her Fidelity brokerage account.

Yep, yep. That old, that old Marco Paul book is hauled out, and there's an iPad playing U season four inside of it. She's like, I'm watching my rape shows that get me through the day, my nice little rape shows. And this hair is concealing the brain that has escaped in my own head. I know these people like the cosplay, but if you're like feeding the chickens, but you have AirPods in and you're listening to Andrew Huberman, are you really... You can't be like... Amish aren't doing that. Yeah, you can't be like, I'm a farmer because a podcast told me to.

Right. It's two counteracting things. You can't do that. Can't do it. You can't do it, Gubba Homestead. We're on to you. A natural cure all from a creature that we were told never existed. The milk.

If it did exist, that would be a big problem. I know. Now, let's talk about. Big pharma is hiding dragons from you. At Pfizer, there's a bunch of guys in suits of Pfizer going like, we have to kill Gubba. She knows the truth about the dinoes. It's got back, yeah. Most of these are plaster, resin, not the real thing.

And the Chinese zodiac calendar just happens. Yeah, it's a big thing. Museums, apparently a lot of those bones aren't real bones. And the bones you see, they're fake or something. Yeah. That's what people say. They're not, they're real. I thought those were real dinosaur bones.

Is that not true? Dinosaurus? I like vaguely Google that, and Jim and I told me something. And I was like, I don't really care. because it doesn't matter if dinosaurs were real I don't really care If George Washington was real it doesn't matter either to me None of it

Me neither actually It doesn't have any effect on I don't care I'm still a dash past member I will say even when I was a kid And we would look at go to the museum And see the dinosaurs I'd be like I don't really I don't buy that

And it wasn't like religious No I was just kind of like It seems a little ridiculous To me Seems a little gauche I believe of them Because we were told archaeologists do a lot of work and they all wear like fag hats and stuff out there in the sun and all that

shit yeah oh this is good for devon's a pit bull devon here you go buddy what's that what's that why regret because you were asking me if you should get your dog fixed or not i'm gonna get her fixed i'm gonna get her fixed you are actually yeah yeah i'm not i'm not gonna be one of these people that like like uh like i hate trans people so much i don't even get my dog fixed You dog's getting fucked There's like whole organizations online Of people being like And it kind of is coming from a weird

Rageful place of trans people They're like just like a human being They will experience some adverse effects If you chop their fucking cock off It's funny to think of Gubba Homestead's Like they like Yeah They have to go to Whole Foods

And they climb into their Ford Raptor In their driveway They just drive out of this up Like It's just so funny man Pull down the TV screen So their retarded children I can watch the dancing strawberries show.

They're like, we're just like cattle ranchers. I mean, you might as well build a pillow for it and like dress up like a knight and a princess and pretend you're in like the medieval times or something. When they take their kids around to Halloween and people go like, what are you? They should go, I'm a, I'm a homesteadie. I drink a big thing of milk and I dress like a retard. People are running out of ways to suck ass and I'm worried for these people. I know.

I'm very worried. but you know who I love? I love the people who suck ass and they stick to their guns with the way they've sucked ass, and they've been doing it for a decade straight. This man I have right here. Oh, my God. This, Jay's, do we have to read ads first, or can we just keep going? I can do either or.

What do you prefer? How about Cliffhanger? Read the ads real quick, and then we're getting into this. This thing sucks more ass than anything I've seen in a very long time. And I'm starting to respect the people who consistently suck ass because they're not even throwing curveball. You know, everybody's so wishy-washy, and then they're like, oh, I'm on the left, I'm on the left now. Who haven't succumbed to society's pressures to fit into the new box you need to be now?

I respect a man who walks a straight line of sucking ass. This is how, Bill Maher, these types of fault, you know. Yes. Because you will be rewarded. Like, we're looking back on Mumford and Sun's guys, and we're like, we miss those guys. The consistency. We were meeting those guys for no reason. It's really all about staying yourself.

You've got to be true to yourself. If you suck ass, you just have to keep sucking ass. Everyone has a little ass sucker in them. I don't like this whole, like, jelly roll. I'm skinny now, and I've changed. No, you just keep being a big fat piece of shit. Don't even get me started on that. Just keep being a big bugger.

That guy. He's a big booger. You're a big booger. A big bugger we drew on. A big, drawn on bugger. The way a Chinese guy can write the psalm, like the Lord's Prayer on a grain of rice. Exactly. A guy did that on his bugger head.

He's a big book. Yeah, he painted a big knife and a cross and a spider for your big retarded buggerhead. Speaking of big retarded spiders, guys, HelloFresh. Is this a make-good? No, this isn't a make-good. They didn't get mad at us. HelloFresh? No. Zock is the only people who've got mad at us because we did what we do on the show all the time.

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Devin, I know you've, I bring it up all the time. You've made a delicious set of tacos. It's tremendous. It's high quality ingredients. They got the recipes. right there on the QR code. The recipe is right there. Or you could just eat all of it out of a bag. Or you could make it however you want. It's great food.

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Okay, we'll edit that out. Sorry, Ben. Hey, guys. We're not editing anything out. Okay. Okay. Nuke the channel. Okay.

Price Picks, if you're listening, we haven't started the ad yet. Yeah. That was riffing into the ad. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're just talking shit about... No, we're talking shit about other stuff. So now we're talking about prize picks. Hey, guys, this episode is brought to you by Prize Picks.

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You guys know we just went to an NFL game this week. Love it. One of the worst Monday night football games of all time. I think there was 10 turnovers. People thought it was a legendary game. Oh, really? Yeah. But from where we were,

it looked like a bunch of bozos. It looked like a bunch of ants dropping a ball over and over again. And you know what I've made that a lot more exciting, Devon, is if we had done prize picks and we were screaming at these people. And we had rosters and stats. If we had rosters and stats and we were screaming at these people for their mistakes. Yes, exactly. It would have been, yeah, the stakes were up and their failures.

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Price Picks, it's good to be right. That's all the ads that we had. Damn, Trey and Matt, their employees at Costa Bada went on strike. because they weren't getting paired. I heard they're cutting out tipping and giving them 30 an hour. 30 an hour, yeah. Because process of living in Denver

and you at least 25 an hour according to like the, you know, the... That seems fair to me. Are they mad about that? No, I think they changed it to make it good for them. Oh, yeah, it's great.

They're happy. Because people probably weren't tipping at Casa Bonita. They were getting trashed and jumping into the river and then just forgetting to tip. It was probably a lot of people who liked South Park

for like the wrong reasons in 97. Yeah, yeah, you're right. Pointing at any black guys. Calling him starving Marvin, yeah. Making clicking noises at the workers. Yeah, shit like that. Here we go. Okay.

You guys, I don't know if you've seen this yet. I don't think I have. It, uh, look, I love Christmas. Sure. This is really going to get you in the spirit. I love Merry Christmas, everyone. May this holiday season bring you the joy of Pete Hick-Seth at Happy Hour. The peace of Donald Jessica Trump sleeping through a national security meeting

And the comfort of Galane Maxwell in a five-star luxury prison. The world's on fire. The news is bleak. The general vibes and well, what's more if you couldn't tell, democracy's gone to hell. And at the heart of it, here's the rocks. Can't. Basically, everything really sucks.

It's beginning to look a lot like f*** this. Wow. Ooh. 2016 is back, baby. 2016 is back with a vigil. But for them, it never went away. You're right. That's when I go, they rule.

Yeah, they rule. In 2019, they go, I'm going to bury myself underground for six years. That's, now it makes all perfect sense. We're talking about ass suckers staying themselves. Yes. They've never gone, they haven't gone anywhere to heaven. That's beautiful. We're the ones who changed.

That's beautiful. I do hope this man is used as a bridge at Alligator Akitraz. I hope they tie, I hope they tie his extremities, like it's Deer Hunter. And Ice walks across him with a trail of immigrants every day. It's like that bridge and sorcerer. Yeah. But Randy Rainbow's intestines has cum-filled intestines. Can't believe.

No one said, hey, This isn't really... Because the fighting back against Trump has been a lot, like, a little funnier lately. It's been a little better. Or not funnier. I don't know. It seemed less gay than in 2016. Yeah, it seemed they were learning, just call them a fat

retard. Like, don't get all... Yeah, they were starting to play a little dirty, you know, I guess, or whatever. But, like, this is just going to do nothing. This is... I want to be the next SNL cast membership. I don't even think. It's worse than that. It's like, I want to replace Stephen Colbert. at the late show

I want to be the worst guy on late night You might do it Colbert really shit the bed smoking weed at the Chateau Marmont Does everybody's getting laid off? Does this have a lot of attention Like that bitch that used to like Sir Cooper lip sync Oh let me see

How much attention does this have It's beginning to look a lot like fuck this No it's like It's all hate? It's like 2000 retweets Is it all hate? No no people that hate don't even go there They don't even find it No they're like happy

Merry Christmas Randy Oh I thought it was like would be like Benny Johnson telling him to kill himself or something. I don't know. I'm seeing it a little bit. Well, no, because the Benny Johnson guys, they've been winning for so long. They're not even needing to throw stones at these people. Yeah, Benny Johnson's like, don't talk shit about my boyfriend.

I wear this man's face like a condo, please. That's why he looks like a yassified Colbert. Yeah, I don't see anybody calling him an Fsler or anything. That's what you're wondering. There's just people saying, I love your work, Randy. I laugh so hard this morning at the time. this one, you brighten my day, you're fabulous. How are those types of people still on

X? It's always a man. I'm actually like, that's a beautiful thing that they've found their ass-sucking corner of X that's not just like racist memes and like violence. Because X is such a hateful toxic place. It's crazy that they're here. With that temperament? It's insane.

They're having a good time. It's insane. They're like teddy bears being held by Dylan Clayball. It's like seeing a squirrel that survived in New York City. It's like, how have you not? get ground up by some machinery. I don't even know where you go with this. He already fired shots at Hagsat, Trump. Everywhere you go.

Can I... We're all panicking? Yeah, go ahead, Jay. Can I just say this man would be the grim sleeper at a Brian Singer party in the 90s? It's really a shame this... A man, this gay and nefarious was not at a Brian Singer party in the 90s

just cutting young men in half with a big sickle. No, he'd put the top on the hot tub of all the kids alive. Yeah, you'd be... He wouldn't let him out. He'd keep them in there like lobsters. You'd be one of the kids auditioning for Sweet Life as Zach and Cody, and you'd hear the Undertaker theme. And he, Randy Rainbow, would be standing behind you.

Just that gong. And you know, you know your ass is about to get exploded like shrapnel. Yeah. Mr. Mosby style. Yeah, Mr. Mosby's going to go ham on your ass. But now he's got to go, it's being a little lot like, what is it? What did he say again? Fuck this.

It's beginning to look a lot like, fuck this. Yeah, they have to censor it because they can only be too edgy. That's the, that's the real F slur. Yeah. They always, they always dip their toe into edgy too because he'll call them like Donald Jessica Trump, which is actually like. So you're making fun of him for being a woman. So like fuck women.

They, they, the left has never been able to figure out if it's like a slur to like say you're gay. They use it now, but it's like, okay, so are gay people bad? What do you? I don't. It's their biggest problem is they took every bullet out of their gun. They're just firing blank guns. That's right. Yeah.

Because you just have to know it's a feeling. You just know you're not like actually hateful. Yeah. But say it all, baby. That's lemon party. That's lemon party. Say them all, but we hope you know.

Yeah, we know who we are. But listen, if you're in a debate, if I was in a debate with J.D. Vance, he could say all manner of things that sound nice. Yeah. I would just call. I would just say shut up faggot. And you have to say that. That wins because he's a faggot.

You would just win. You have mascara on. You panic at the disco fag. By the way, not shitting on Erica Kirk, because, I mean, every time she's on TV, it feels completely sincere to me. Sure, of course, of course. Right, of course.

Right, and that's why she's turning into Regisville, then. She looks like, she looks like J.D. Vann. She starts, like, she gets the mascara. Yep. Devin. It's a lot. I think it's a subliminal film. She was starting like a fat gamer.

She was being interviewed by that. Like a neckbeard gamer. Who's that Jewish Bean that bought CBS? Ezra Klein. Oh, Barry Wise. Barry Wise. Yeah, she won a hot dog-eating contest, I heard. That's right.

They gave her, like, $250 million. She ate him really quickly. She ate Kobayashi, actually. And then deported him. She shit him out and deported the shit. Yeah, people are salty about her winning all those hot dog-egeting contests, but whatever. Stay hating. Sorry.

Sorry, she trained her whole life eating a nitrates. And now she's rich because of it. I think she's such a talentless return. I can only imagine her winning. Yeah. winning all the money through eating yeah lard ass stand by me she's look at a stick of like geeky she uh bothers me yeah she's one of those people that looks like every time you see her you're like did you i guess you lost weight but you're still fat and suck ass she's skinny obese

yes yes yeah um but she was like i don't know i saw some clip of her just talking to erika kirk and um yeah she was like crying but then she wasn't she saying something like what do you say these people who say Charlie deserved it like that type of thing yeah yeah and she she went off on them

but she went like all like Clint Eastwoodie she said like you know he comes he would come home and like put the kids down Shabbat Shalom and it was weird it was a little uh yeah a little slip but like I said it's only I only will in six months I'll say

you didn't love them. Once they shoot. We're not there yet. I think you said that like three weeks ago. Three weeks ago? I think you said that like, yeah, weeks ago. I said seven months. So we're almost, I'm almost right.

Yeah, exactly. I said that in that, when I said that, I said in seven months. But it's fine, though. Nobody gives a shit about Charlie Kirk anymore. Everybody completely just stopped giving a shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And now they're going to shoot us chavance into a big whaling wall with a cannon. And then Kirk is going to be the next Mrs. Vice President. Yeah. I think it's beautiful. I will, the one, the weird thing is just getting out there and being on the news. Yeah. And even, just, I mean, so often.

I just couldn't imagine. Couldn't imagine even being able to speak the people if I, uh, went through that. But that's just me. I'm not a, maybe I'm a weak person. What's a JD stand for, just dudes? Yeah, just dudes, man. That's what you say on stage. Yeah, in a debate.

In a debate. Mm-hmm. Then it's bombing, and you go, he's a gay guy. You go, Hillbilly, elegy sucked. Just dick. book sucked as yeah i gave your mom some zanics and she sucked my dick your mom's a drug addict and i fucked her

using drugs against her i think trump's going to probably die of natural causes by the summer and then he's just going to be president yeah pretty sure yeah it's yeah we'll just have a human apple watch as a president yeah i think trump has dementia do you think so yeah why he keeps trying to hide the thing he's getting in his hand and there's a pretty big theory that he's getting dementia of medication into his there's severe bruising and stuff. And also, I guess it got memory hold. They're pretty good at memory-holing

when we didn't see Trump for like eight days straight. And then the media was like, where has he been? And then J.D. was like, the media is nuts. Because the president wasn't photographed for eight days straight, and they were closing down lanes to the hospital in Virginia. Yeah.

He probably had like a massive brain bleed or something. And that'll come out way later. He came back and he was drooping. And then, yeah, when he came back, he started to tie. I don't know if I'm going to get into heaven. Yeah. I hope I get into heaven. He knows that the clock is winding down and he has months.

And he almost died. I don't know. He had a Russian with death. I don't think he's going to make it to the summer. I don't mean it sound like a lip or whatever. I mean, I hope, like, I don't hope anyone dies, obviously, but I think he's going to die. I hope a lot of people die. I won't say who, but.

Why did we not see him for like eight days straight? There was no photographs on him. Was there a bunch of pizza being ordered to, like, like the Pentagon and the White House and stuff. Yeah, while he was disappeared, which is always like a big potential thing. Isn't pizza the big, like their number one pedophile food? Anytime of the peckfalls dies, yeah. In Memorial, they have to get a lot of pizza.

You have to go with what we know. We have no evidence. He has dementia. We have evidence. They all fuck kids and pizza. That we have. Oh, you're saying he took eight days off to go fuck kids. They took eight days off for, it was like a sabbatical, like a pedophile sabbatical.

Right before they were like, hey, it's all going to come out. we might as well, like, fucking go to town for eight days. Oh, he's, like, a heroin addict, like, kicking it? Yes, yes. He's, like, one week in a hotel room, and then I'm good for life. And he's a pig about it. Yeah. I don't know. I, he's always so the same to me.

Any picture, you could go to 2016 throughout that run, and I bet there's pictures, and they go, look, he's dying. Yeah, they always also, they always are, like, he's dying, and then he seems to come back, like, two weeks later and be fine. He seems to exact same for me. He might live forever. I fully plan for him to outlive me, and then when I die, I can go to heaven. He's there ahead of me somehow.

He's always leaving his hand under the table like this. He doesn't want anyone to see it. And there's one photographer who's always zooming out on his hand trying to take pictures of it and then posting it. And he has, like, a giant bandage. There's huge bruises underneath. Can't it just be from bruising from getting IVs and liquid because he's doing a ton of shit as an old man? Well, that's what Ben's saying. He's getting a lot of IVs for his brain and shit.

It doesn't need to be, like, dementia. It could be like electrolytes and. like shit that helps a president that's like old I don't think it would cause intense bruising if it was just like I think you should

I get bruised when I get a like a shot I get a little bit of a bruise he's like old as shit old people bruise easily Maybe you're right I don't know you're a lip cut No you're trying to take the show

and our numbers Devin was right about him not being a petafile last year so yeah you're probably right well it still hasn't come out he hasn't released his own info yeah so check

checkmates come back The pedophile didn't release his pedophile notes. You can't know if I'm a pedophile or not. I haven't stopped lying. So you'll never know. I never said if I did it or not. So maybe I didn't.

I don't know. The obsession with heaven makes me think he's dying. That is an interesting term, but that's also just him getting older. He knows it. It's not, you know, it's going to happen in the next 10 to 15 years. I think it's like a cat, man. A cat just eventually starts wandering around in the woods and it lays down and dies. Yeah.

Yeah. I think he intuitively knows it's up. Wouldn't that be amazing if he dies he walks out onto the White House law and just kind of gets down in the fetal position and just starts going like he goes and hides under the White House

to die alone. You have to pay a gardener to drag him out. Remember when he disappeared over Labor Day weekend and they kept gaslighting us about it but then he came back and then he stood on the roof of the White House? Yeah, just staring. at the sun. I think he was saying, like, I just

want to stand on it one last time because I don't know how much longer I have left. And then he started talking to the press about heaven. It kind of adds up. He's just a weirdo, though. Yeah. Maybe there was a nice rack that he wanted to scope out. He's looking at a woman's tins. Yeah, I think everything's way more simple. I don't even think he thinks of

like last moments or like that it's around the corner. I don't think, I think he lives in the moment constantly and is just, it's all about his fun. I think if he knew he was dying, he'd like want to get like one last packet of M&M's, you know. That would be his last thing before he goes. Just eat candy? Yeah, he'd be like, bring me the poison, and then he'd open a jolly ranch

and be like, okay, I'm ready to die. Maybe you're right, Ben. I don't know. It's very possible to know. I don't know how any of these presidents go. They're old as shit. They speak at a million places every day. I thought Joe Biden was going to be dead for sure.

The fact that he's still not dead is amazing. Yeah, it's crazy. Have you seen that video of him, like, walking around a bookstore in Nantucket the other day? Yeah. And he's just like, he's a ghost. He doesn't even touch the thing. the ground anymore. He's like Mr. Burns. Okay, back to the, it's a big end to look a lot

like black boys. Oh, do you guys actually want to hear it? Yeah, we've got to get the rest of this, please. All right, here we go. Keep pissed and stressed. Everyone feels depressed. With clonopin and Xennax dwindling low. It's beginning to smell a lot. So they're saying we're drug addicts?

The president is a drug addict. The left has always been very happy to be drug addicts. I think they say we're all picky. Panic and stressed with con. take their mind because everything's so stressful that they're doing Colonnaplan and Xanax and right you know they've also been keeping the cartel thriving sure of course hipster parties in Brooklyn yeah it is a part of a liberal not being able to deal with any adversity

whatsoever and kind of wanting the world to hand you everything so when it's not that way you take quantum as long as they can get juiced up and talk about socialism yes with that in the without ever having to actually do it whatsoever yeah because if I have to plow field I'll blow my fucking brains out. Exactly. I'm a lip. I love. I love the ice rindling low.

It's beginning to smell a lot like bullshit. Whoa. Roads at every door. Also. And it didn't far fetch them. I love the ice raids are like the ninth thing he mentions. Other than just being kind of rude to reporters.

That's the most important thing to a liberal is just being nice to reporters. Yes. To keeping up the image of democracy. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And it didn't farfetch to think that we're standing on the brink of a civil war. More health care benefits cut in a government shut down to keep us on.

The civil war point is kind of tired to me. I don't feel like, I feel like it's the least in the last, like, four years that we've felt like a civil war is going to happen. Around 2020 and this last and 2024's election, it felt like the more civil warry time. now it's like just because of the Epstein stuff I feel like Republicans are all fractured and it doesn't feel like as much of a civil war I think yeah I think we've kind of realized that there's nothing you can do that we will take up arms against the government like there's not a single you could start snatching children out of like homes and we'd just be like whatever we'd let it happen it's not ours hopefully it's not they could not come like I was I would do something but the whopper wopper wopper commercial was playing the burger burger burger commercial was playing I didn't want to get up I don't think there's a single thing thing Americans would take up arms against at this point? No, no, I wouldn't, yeah. Yeah, I mean,

maybe gas. If, like, if gas doubled overnight. No, it's happened before. They might pop some shots out at the government building or two. It happened. But it's happened. It's happened before, and we just,

we just take it in the ass. We just keep getting ass fucked. There was a few months. It was like eight bucks. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, California. And we just all complained. point it puts up with anything it just true it was just all it is just like it's just a bit it's just

somebody at the comedy store is like you believe gas eight dollars yeah yeah it's all a hacky comedian from the 70s it's doing yeah yeah because you're right but like you can't do that in like the middle of texas you do that there's like they'll drive they'll drive to washington dc yeah they need to upset the texans like make their gas i think everything will start with like you just have to really piss off the texans yeah because california you could just you could rape us every day and we'd just we'd be like, but it's 82. It's 78.

I'm only 40 minutes from the beach. Rape me all your way. Sure, sure, sure. Just turn my face to the window. It's a sunny day. It's a sunny day. Fuck me into the fridge. I can be in the mountains in an hour.

You got every climate, baby. Empty you bomb. inside me I don't care yeah it sucks I mean I was trying to I was trying to take my kids to the like the outdoor mall

my daughter's like climbing a thing and then just like just a guy walks behind me and another mom with a baby and he's just doing that motherfucker I'll fucking kill you I'll kill everybody and we just have to stare straight ahead and just pretend it's not

as he's just tweaking and saying he's going to kill everybody and then I look out of the corner of my eye security guard is like scrolling and following and like 30 feet away making sure he like walks out and he's just a whole and my daughter turns and is like

I can see her she's like why is everybody not staring at this guy and you go honey honey you're being a very you're being a neocon right now and then I realize how traumatic it is for her to see something like that a guy is screaming he's going to kill everybody in his vicinity

and then freaked out that I'm just I'm doing this. Because the last thing you want to do with a guy like that is stand up and be like, buddy, get it. Because then you, yeah, then you become part of their insane world. Yes, so you have to pretend they're invisible. Yeah. They can only see you if you move. They're like the rap.

Once they set their, like, their Iron Man sights on you, it's over. We're like, you know. And I have L.A. brain where in my head I go, those guys are never violent. They'll never do anything. Well, you kind of, yeah, you kind of have to tell yourself that. But it's terrifying. No, it's terrifying. It's terrifying.

It just completely kind of my adrenaline went up. My cordis, like, everything spiked. And I was like, I can't believe I have these little babies. Just you can't get away from any of these guys here. You can't get away from them. They just, they, and they, why did they yell such violent things? Yeah, I was going to say. Why did they yell that they just want to kill everybody?

Because they're having a sane reaction to the world. Yeah, they kind of, they kind of actually looked at the void with no filter in between it. You should look at your daughter and go, honey, that man is the only sane person here. Honey, I make money from doing that into a microphone. It's a barbaric yacht. No, it is. If you can't pass like a smell test, you know how there's like noise pollution and air, like, they should, if they should be able to like test, like, the government should be able to test these people. If the smell increases over a certain level, you just get your head cut off.

Yeah, if you smell like vinegar and your hair has like dirt in it. Yeah. You smell like the crease between balls and a thigh too much. Yes, exactly. It is very funny. What if Pigpin loved knives? Yeah. That's these guys.

And wanted to kill everyone. What if Pigpin was going to kill you? What if pig pin thrashed around like a robot that's going out of control? It's always funny to me with those guys. They're just crazy enough that no laws apply to them anymore whatsoever. You know what I mean? Like they can get, they get stabbed in the lung with a screw drawer walking to an emergency room. We're just like, here's all the free health care you want.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead. A million dollars on a little city. Hey, the worst, bud, get back out there. That's every news story is like a woman, you know, with like a 180 prior arrest, ends up like cutting the manager's head off at Target, like scanning it. That's what I mean. It's like, they're like, oh, you shit in a big footlong at subway. Okay, you're just weird enough to get it back out there.

But if that guy was slight, if that guy was just like, hey, I'll fucking kill you. Then we're like, you're going to jail, asshole. What the, we're going to take your car from you. Fuck you. the last time I had it I was trying to put with my daughter on the golf course and then another guy came back motherfucker doing that

fuck you fuck you all fucking kill and he's turning around and there's just another two security guards just going we got him and then there was a sheriff and like a park ranger some shit and everybody's just following him from like 50 yards away just making sure he moves off the course they go sir sir just please don't we can't do anything sir Please don't make us do anything

Please don't make us kill you Sir, if I touch you I will get fired Sir Please My job is wearing a yellow shirt I think cops should be allowed To turn off their body cams for 60 seconds a day Yeah

And once they use it up for the day They can't turn it off anymore They get one They get one a day It resets every 24 hours You know what that's not a terrible idea Do whatever you want I'd not even say

Not even once a day Like once a month and then you know if you see him turn it off it's like oh I really fucked up and he's gonna pop me yeah it scares me every time especially with a kid I don't know how to handle it yet no I know with the kid would drive me nuts

it's it's fine I've been I just pick her up and get her away from it but I mean then what am I supposed to punch the guy with like one hand if he comes at me yeah no you got it you just do I throw my kid up into the tree you just completely avoid them you walk the other way I think it's kind of like a bear I think it's a bear where you put your food up in the tree right I think you throw your baby into like a tall

like pine tree and make hope they get stuck on the way down you tire in a big bandana and then lift her up like she's a big single witch so you can't get at her because you're we got yogi bears on crack running around our neighborhoods yeah I don't know you should get a big knife or something or big like can't do fixed blade in California get pepper spread well do a pocket knife you can't well I mean what's a pocket knife could do let's be honest they could cut his throat open and you can bleed out to death that's a good point actually I should start wearing big watches like Jay's because I feel like maybe you could then wrap the watch around your knuckles and then use that as a thing. Yeah, there's some big ones. You could probably bash his fucking

brain in if you want to do. I could send you some big ones to kill the guy with. For self-defense, I'm going to start carrying around a mace. Like a big, a big spiky ball on a chain. I'm put it in my pocket. I look like Big J with it in my pocket. Yeah. People think you just suck ass. They don't know you're scared. Like I look at this fucking gay hot top. I'm willing around my own cannon. Yeah, you should get some, I don't know, maybe like get that piano wire that they use in mob movies or something, you know, you choke a guy out. I like that. Yeah.

Whatever. I mean, these guys never do anything. Until they do. Until they do. Until you see the surveillance footage where you're like, oh, my God. But then I tell myself, I go, well, that guy, that guy didn't know to look away like I did. I know. I look away in a much better way than that guy does.

It's always at like 3 a.m. Yeah. But yeah, you do have to convince yourself that the way you stepped by them was like the perfect way. The perfect step. Yeah, the perfect. I have the perfect move around them. I always try to tell myself that I'm so big that if they do come for me, it's like, well, that guy is trying to do suicide by cops. I can just do whatever I want at that point.

Yeah, yeah. I can just Daniel Penny that guy to death. Yeah. But you never know. I avoid. I keep my head on a swivel. I pull up the gas stations in the middle of nowhere. and I'll sit in my car

and scan the area and if I even see one over there just like kind of hobbling I'll leave I hate them yeah they just stink I want to hit them with my car

they're exhausting they're just exhausting people they're exhaust they're always screaming they're gonna hurt people or you know it's like they're gonna kill God and you live up already

yeah why do you guys have so much energy why do they never kill themselves they're never just jumping off like the freeway overpass just just do that already. Your life is hell. If they do, they're like a hydro, like, two

pop up in their place. Like, they start walking down the road. Yeah, it's, it's, um... No, I don't know. It's like even, like, uh, it's gotten to the point where I've just lived out in L.A. for selling that. If I see him, I'm just kind of like, if the guy's going to like, I'm like, that's kind of hack.

I've heard that one. Like already. The fucking kill you guys. Yeah. They'll yell, they just sometimes yell the N-word. Yeah. Now that, I'm like, Bravo. I'll to be a dollar for that one. You gave him your wallet. I go, sir, credit cards for a day.

24 hours, then I shut it off. Do what you want. Do you want to go buck crazy. Oh, wow. Yeah, he goes and buys by his podcasting equipment. I go, no. I'm trying to get this thing to play because I want to close out here and, um, because I'm really in the Christmas spirit this week.

Sure. Because everybody thinks, oh, I'll get in the Christmas spirit later. Christmas comes. It's all month. It comes so quick. It comes so quick. Get in the Christmas spirit now. Celebrate it all.

Don't waste it. Look at this megachurch right here. Now, me and Jace didn't grow up in anything like this. This would be incredibly satanic. But this is the little drummer boy. This is church. That's a laser show.

Devin, this is church. Devin, this is what Jesus was. Is this the little drummer boy? Like an SEC game. It's church. Praise God. They're flying. They're flying.

At least they're using all the money for good. At least they're using all the money for good. Devin, the idea of how many people they could feed or hungry. There's so many people starving this winter. and they're like, it's like Jesus was like, I want, I want drummer boys to levitate at a big concert. Jesus

said, get me Steve Ioki. Have him throw a bunch of cakes at people. And it's always funny, anytime there is like a hurricane or something, they just board this place up immediately. Yeah, no one's allowed to like stay the fuck out. They're like, they'll ruin the stage. Yeah. This is for the blue man group

only. Fuck heads. It's like closer to Vegas than that is a church. No, there should be tigers that they make disappear in the name of Jesus Christ God. Big sexy electric guitar. A little Chinese guys doing flips. Chinese guys. In church. What a fucking chum.

I know. Wow. The rules. Yeah. What did you learn in church today? I learned that lasers fucking. kick ass. Fog machines are cool.

Yeah, drumline guys can have neon drums that float in the air. That's the original church. Yeah. Right there. That's the apostolic church. Yeah, that's what Paul was trying to destroy. Paul wanted... Saul was trying to destroy fog machines. Yeah. Do the apostles. If you

look back your own text, they liked fog machines. Saul was actually blinded on the road to Damascus by a laser show. And that's why he couldn't see for three days. That would be funny if you were visited by like an angel of the lord and he comes down there's just smoke machines and lasers and he's yeah you see a bright light and you're like who is it you just hear party rockers in the house tonight everybody gonna have a good time an angel that looks like red foo covered in eyes

a biblically accurate red foo so good we're gonna celebrate and have a good time Everybody, pray that. That's close. Patreon.com slash Limba Party, but that is really closer to like, that's more like the Sofi Stadium when we went to see the Eagles play the Chargers this week.

Yes, that looks like a halftime show. Yeah. You go, that's true. If I woke up in that, I wouldn't think I'm in church. I have no idea. That's Christ's half time show. Before he gets killed.

He's like Shakira's there. Yeah, before he gets killed. Yeah, they take him off the cross so you can get Gatorade and go over a game plan. Yeah, and then they have T.I. Do a song real quick. The Church of Christ that me and Jace grew up in, I looked at the stats on it, and with the attendance records, they're going down so low that they won't exist by, like, 2050.

Yeah, get fucked, bozo. Rest and piss, Bozo. It's falling off a cliff as people are dying. They're not recruiting enough people to the church, so it's going to die out as a sect pretty much. I wonder why. You're losing people at the club of old people that tell you to not jack off. I wonder why they're losing people. I would go, like, that church kicks ass.

You probably can scroll, and no one judges. you. While the sermon does, they're on their phones. You can scroll. Yeah, they're doing, they're taking video of it. The preacher comes out, he says feel free to scroll. You're now allowed to scroll. Yeah. He goes, you go watch porn. He's like, aside for my sermon. You can watch

watch. Yeah. I'm going to pass around the trays. Put a little E.T.H. In there. Put a little coin in there. Brother. I'm going to get my sermon. Somebody get get subway surfers up on the screen. Someone get them little kids Some get the family guy compilations up Get the family guy compilations

I'm gonna preach about abundance I'm gonna preach about How you can never have enough Yeah you know Jesus once said somewhere That money's good Fuck bitches get money That's what he said on the mount Sermon on the Mount

It's so funny how the righteous gemstones have kind of predicted the like the arch Yeah it's what's funny is the righteous Jimstones doesn't have the budget to shoot an accurate church. I don't know, because they have so much money. There's so much money. The right shows is a great show, but then you watch it. Oh, that's like a third of what this church would actually be doing.

They don't have been big enough budget. Yeah, HBO can't compete with any church in fucking, you know, Goobertown, Alabama. Well, those televangelists, like, they all have, like, 90 private jets. Yeah. Yeah, they have, like, armies, yeah. Patreon.com slash little party. We're going over to the Patreon. now folks if you want to join us we'll see you next week bye bye bye

my chain my chine don't you like my chine mine yon goochie mine and I'm popping off the chain mine and my take a bit so fruited call me Gucci mine no you call me gucucci my chine don't you like my chine mine young goochin mine and I'm popping off the chine mine and my take a bit so fruited call me goochie mine no you call me called me Gucci, Gucci. I came to the club just to fuck my chain line. Catch another charge and I'm going to the chain game. Oh, I think I'm icing.

Sold a hundred-doubt, e-balloning sex and white screen. Don't you see how bright it is? See these girls in country girls be telling me how tight it is. These girls they be choosing. Diamonds be so sparkly they think my chain was moving. My chain is out the chain. Stack to meet some minded, budget off and bought a chine. Check the way my chine hang.

Gucci, I don't gain, bang. All I do is chine. My chine, my chink, don't you like my chine, mine. Young Gucci mine, and I'm popping off the chint, mine. And my check a bit so fruited. Call me Gucci mine, no you call me Gucci, Gucci. My chine, my chine, don't you like my chine, mine. Young, Gucci, mine, and I'm popping off the chine, mine.

And my Jacob is so fruited Call me Gucci mine No you call me Gucci Gucci Gucci you be shining Goochie you be shining man Don't turn me on home Tell me who you're diamond man My girlfriend acting like She say I'm acting different

Just because I got this chained Haters get your hater on When they see them yellow stones hollin at you later on My chain hanged to my shoe strike Like my watching wine But I know you love my chine My chine hanged to my dangle line

I do my thud dine When I'm in the club mine When you hurt so icy You thought a Gucci mine I got that stupid mind So I bought a stupid chine My chine Don't you like my chine mine

Young Gucci mine And I'm popping off the chite mine And my chakabit is so fruited Call me Gucci mine No you call me Gucci Gucci My chine My chine Don't you like my chile

my chime, young Gucci mine, and I'm popping off the chime, and my Jacob is so fruited. Call me Gucci mine, no you call me Gucci, Gucci. My first chain I had to rob for it. Jesus piece, yellow diamond sitting all in it. I'm on some slick brick shit. 2006, Mr. T. Diamond's so bright, ain't no way you can't see the G. Look, I don't dance, I just lean with it. My piece is sick, Gary Robert, trying to leave with it.

I got that New York fitted on. Full suit, Dickie on. Gucci link chain, blue stones in a nigga charm. Now watch me do it. Do it with no hands. Traps when he craned on that bezel and that band. Because I'm the man. I'm the man.

Got no wife, but my chain got my girlfriend. My chain, my chain, don't you like my chine, mine? Young Gucci mine and I'm popping off the chide, mine. And my Jacob is so fruited. Gucci mine, no you call me Gucci Gucci, Gucci. My chain, my chain, don't you like my chime, mine? Y'all, Gucci mine, and I'm popping off the chain, mine. And my Jacob is so fruited.

Call me Gucci, mine, no you call me Gucci, Gucci.