lemonparty - 184: Too Many Little Rats Part 1

Episode Date: May 4, 2026

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Testing check. Check, check. Check, check. Check. Okay, yeah, now I can hear yours. What did you say, Evan? Wait, you actually can hear it? Well, no, I can, I'm looking at the audio.

I don't even have headphones. Does it seem okay? I don't know, man. I'm sorry, I was just texting back a guy that works at the club who's probably on like fucking fentanyl. We're so right now, ladies gentlemen, we are pulling out of a Buckees in Katie, Texas. we did a show at my fucking rice crispy treat fell off the fucking

my fucking rice crispy treat damn it yeah we're driving away from the buggies we're driving back to Austin it's like gray room midnight great room great acoustics it's been a kind of a crazy day it's been a nuts a day

been got food poisoning from cheesecake factory Ben's horribly ill I'm Indian Ben is Indian. Ben is Indian Hitler. Ben caught Indian. Ben was literally shitting himself up to the point we walked on stage for the show. But we're pros. I threw up so much all day.

Got the IV drip. They charged me about $300 for the drip. They did the whole thing. They did two bags because I wasn't pissing off of one bag. Yeah, it's kind of like annoying. It's because I threw up online and shit my pants. in the hotel room. It was nasty.

But I don't love that. I kind of felt like we did like a placebo effect thing on you. What do you mean? In terms of doing like the whole like, oh, let's get him an IV. I don't really know if those work. Ben didn't feel any different after he did it. No, you do it as punishment. It's something you give $300 for because you're shitting yourself.

Yeah. That's it. But I don't know. If it helped on any level, that was great. Do we want to talk about the guy getting thrown out of the show? Yes, of course we have to. All right. Well, it kind of looked like something out of, oh, brother, we're art, though.

It was an old brother. We're out, though. Yeah. With an A. Yeah, okay. So, live podcast was going great in Houston. And thanks to everyone coming out in Austin, too. I don't even know how to say this.

We were talking about Marvel movie. We were shitting on Marvel movies. And you said, does anybody here like Marvel movies? Because I've never met anybody who's seen all the Marvel movies. Yep. And then the only black guy in the room stood up in the back and got really pissed off. Yeah, he got so mad. And he started screaming that, I guess we suck.

Yeah, it was like, you guys hate everything. Like, everybody loves Marvel. movies, dude. Yep. But he stood up to say this shit. Oh, he stood up. And was very aggressive. It was like a get your hands out of my pocket

moment. He acted like he was going to get assassinated. I thought it was it, honestly. I'll be honest. I thought that was it. We were going. And he just, I was literally like, okay, snub knows.

Here it goes. Goodbye, everybody. I mean, he just started screaming. And then people started screaming at him. Uh, Yeah, it was very weird. And then the bartender jumped over and got him in a headlock, it seemed, and a couple of people dragged him out. Yeah, the bartender, he didn't, the bartender didn't headlock him, he belly bumped him out the door.

Like, he literally bumped him with his belly like 20 times in a row. That's the Houston way. Yeah, the Houston. We're literal bouncers. That's literally Houston karate is just belly bumping people like George Foreman. They bankist him. They gave him the bankists. But yeah, it was just really.

weird. It was very strange. It was not how we wanted the show to go. It was just the last 10 minutes. But it was the last 10 minutes. The show was going great. But yeah, he did that and it made it kind of weird.

But he kept talking about like the bars he wanted to like show us tonight. Well yeah, he said he was going to, he goes I have a podcast. You guys are lame as fuck. That's why you're not on YouTube. I got bars for you right now. Let me drop these bars. You all are scared. Which we literally, I I thought he literally was gonna, he wanted to do a rhyme for us.

Yeah. I was, I didn't know, Devin, apparently that just means he's, he wants to insult us, right? The bars, man, yeah, no, rhymes. Yeah, it meant he had, like, he meant he had, like, verses, like, ready for us. He was, oh, so he was going to just, like, say poetry at us. Or maybe he met, like, jokes. Like, maybe, you know, sometimes they say bars or jokes or whatever. So maybe he had, like, jokes ready.

I really don't know, but it, he really, uh, he fucked up and. he wanted the whole night to be about that, apparently. And the fucked up thing was earlier in the night, I saw him, and he was the only black guy there, and I was like, but as far as I saw, only black guy there, and I was like, hell yeah. We got him. And then, God, he fucking turned.

And as they were dragging him out, he started shouting, y'all are fucking racist. Yep, he went to the last resort where it was like, oh, wow, okay. But then he go, I listen every morning, y'all racist as shit. And it pisses me off. He literally said he listens every single morning.

So I'm like, okay. He said first thing in the morning, he listens and it pisses him off is what he said to. So good. So he wakes up to like a radio that starts playing our voices and then he gets mad is what he said. No, it was clearly a guy who was like, okay, I'm about to get kicked out. Like I'm just going to like reach for the lowest hanging fruit. Yep. And he goes, you guys are fucking racist.

Your pieces of shit. That's why you got banned off YouTube, all that shit. It was kind of hilarious because it was sold out. Yeah. And there's one black guy. And they threw him out. They threw him out. Yeah.

Like literally from an, he threw him. And he was like, you guys are being racist. And it's like, well, I guess technically, yeah. I guess we are. We're kicking you out. But the staff loved it. It felt like it was like, that boy sold his soul to the devil. Yeah.

And literally, they threw it. him out and they go, stay out of Woolworth. Yeah. They're playing fiddles. Yeah. He's babyface Nelson. Yeah. Yeah, it was crazy. I thought he kind of like seemed like he wanted to like rush the stage. No, he was trying to come on the stage. He was trying to come up to the stage. Like four or five people. But luckily, luckily T. T. Boone Pickens kicked him out.

And we were literally, we were talking to people afterwards. They're like, that's just Houston, man. That's what happens in Houston. Yep. We had a lot of that. It's just violence. That was just Houston. Yeah. Or, like, I was like, oh, I hate, I didn't enjoy that. I don't want him to, you know. He was, he was, like, retarded, but, like, it was, like, I don't think it would have gone that way traditionally. Like, if he, like, I don't know.

Well, I think we could, we wanted to talk to him and just, like, make fun of him for being retarded. But then, like, people started. Yeah, I think it's, I think it's. Everyone started screaming at him and then it turned bad. I think he started yelling too loud in it, and everybody started yelling back at him, which made him yell louder. Yeah. And it just turned into the bus out of nowhere. And so, like, we wanted to talk to the guy because we knew he would just keep saying retarded things.

And then we would say funny things. And we would look like gods. Yeah. Yeah. But we didn't have that opportunity because the club kicked him out. Sometimes you got to squish the bug. It's fun to play with the bug. We all play with the bug.

Oh, yeah. For sure. That's what I was calling him all night. I don't know why he got upset. I called him a bug. Sometimes you got to squish the bug. It was funny. We had done so much stuff.

he should have got him mad at. And then he was like, you leave Spider-Man alone. Oh, yeah, he did. I think he actually said that. Yeah. And I obviously wasn't talking about any of the Sam Ramey Spider-Man's. Yeah, of course, of course. Sam Ramey Spider-Man is incredible.

You're the best movies ever made. The first two. What are you eating? Jerky. Nice. We didn't have went to Buckees. What do you want from him? I don't know.

I just stood in line behind, like, I think, the entire country of Venezuela. I'm eating my buckies now. I know. Everybody's been so retarded. Devin, the guy, our valet at the hotel this morning, was a tiny, two-foot-tall of Venezuelan man. And I'm carrying an armload of hats and posters that are like almost dropping out of my hands waiting for the car.

And he just walks out to me and goes, he goes, you said a heads? He goes, what are you doing with the hats? And then he could want to like, do you sell the hats in the hotel? He literally said, he goes, how many hats did you sell in the hotel? And we go, no, no, no. It's like for like, we do like a podcast. We like did him at a show. We sold, we saw him at a show.

It goes like, like the big show. The big show. You're the wrestler. The wrestler is the big show? You look like, no, not that. And we're, by the way, we're furious. We're furious. Because we just are, we, it's raining and we want to get out of here.

We're so hungover. We're going to pick up my brother who might be dead in an IV clinic. I was, I was done for it. I thought I would just lay on stage. You guys would have to do the live show. And then the guy goes, he goes, can I see the hat? And then he just started grabbing a hat, like the most, he started doing jinga in my hands. Yep.

He started grabbing the most structurally important hat. And then the posters started to fall. So I threw all the hats at him. I go, this is yours now. Now you have to take them. Now time to hold them. I said time to hold them. And I threw them all in his hand.

So the posters wouldn't fall in the fucking, the wet, like, sidewalk. Because it was raining too. Yep. No, he was a smiley bozo. It was just like this fucking, like this fucking retarded city. And then we drove to a more retarded city in five hours of rain. No, I think Austin's more retarded. You think so?

Yeah. I think it's different species of retarded. So it's more like which retard do you hate? Yeah, it's all in the retard family. You're right. Do you hate the guy in the Patagonia vest eating the slop bowl? or do you hate the little Venezuelan man on cocaine

who's going to shoot you in the head those are your two those are your two choices in Texas between Austin and Houston yeah maybe Houston is like more like venomous yeah but we also I like in Austin we saw like a homeless guy pop out of another homeless guy's chest

yeah like a fucking body horror film it was Tony scurry away was Tony it was Tony Hitchcliff he burst out of a giant black man's chest who's laying on the ground and then went

eh and then scurried across the cement no Tony's like alien he just starts coming out of you you're just hanging out and all of a sudden

your your stomach has like a something to say we had we had some good times too in Austin yeah got hammered with a lot of people it's just so

It's so tiring. It is exhausting. I haven't drank for four days in a row since I've been in my 20s and I'm not, I'm really not good at it. I just started crying in front of Devin for one day. I literally, and we're just running out of things to say. So I just want to say, I don't want to share this, but I was just talking to Devin. Ben was like shitting somewhere. Ben was shitting blood out of himself.

Is this guy trying to flicker me down or something? No, I think you're right. Is that just his lights? It's a big truck. It's just a big truck with his lights going out good. What kind of bugs driving? It's Indian, don't worry. Classic Indian.

But Ben was shitting his brains out somewhere, and then I was just talking to David. I just started crying because I couldn't control by emotions anymore. Because I'd been hung over three days in a row. Very embarrassing for me. No, I appreciated it, but it was out of nowhere. It was completely out of nowhere. It was completely out of nowhere.

It confused you at first, actually. It did confuse me. I was like, what's going on? I was like, is something just happened? I was like, are we being attacked? Yeah, did you sit on your balls? I was like, yeah, did you, is that a torsion situation? Was that a, yeah, no, but we've, we've been, we've been hammered for a while now.

We've been on the hunt. Truly. We've been working hard. And we've been working hard. And we've been hunted, apparently. And we've been hunted. and a guy hunted us tonight. Exactly.

And tried to rush the stage like he was boned saw Jim Duggett. The guy literally thought he was doing wrestling at the show. Yeah, yeah, we have Vince Young tried to kill us tonight. And then he got kicked out and went to the cheesecake factory. Which is what got Ben sick, we believe. Yeah, Benz, what do you think gave you the food poisoning? Cheesecake factory?

It's possible. That pathetic salad that you have? had where they threw a bunch of like fucking shit stand to Ruggula on top of uh beats and uh goat cheese i felt like it's like it's like just bring me the bedding from a hamster cage at PetSmart like just a bunch of hay and alfalfa and like gerbill shit it actually looked like what you feed like a reptile like it should have a dead mouse in it it should have a big pink baby mouse in it that was frozen yeah we kept me and Devin kept doing this bed that was really cracking me up where the food was so I had a salad that

tasted like a doctor pepper somehow I had a cob salad that was too sweet to eat it was hurting my teeth it was it was like coated in sugar it was like coated in sugar that was insane and we kept doing this bit that the waiter comes over and she's like does everything taste good and we go no it's terrible thank you and then she goes oh really well that's how we like it yeah and then then somebody goes mine's really good and she goes let me take that back yeah She goes, oh, let me get that. And she takes it back to the chef, and she's like, he said this was delicious. And the chef's like, what?

I burnt the shit out of that. What are you talking about? So then, yeah, Ben got a, Ben got a. Well, that's what you get for going to a cheesecake factory at the. We were at the Barton Square Creek Ball. Oh, yeah. We were going to see Devil Wars product, too, which is a piece of shit. But we posted up in the massage chairs at the very front.

We did. Just in case there was a guy who ran in with an hour 15, we could point him to where the people were. No, we did the massage chair thing. Yeah, a guy runs. within age of R15, he goes, oh my God, I'm huge fans. Then we go, there's swarms of them that way. You can't miss. Just go down that way.

Honestly, I walked through the food court of Barton Square Creek Mall, and I'm like, this, none of you are real. They're real. Did you see, like, that old man eating fried chicken? What was that? Ben, Ben, literally, yes, I did. You did see that guy? You didn't bring that up at the time. I didn't bring it up at the time. I know exactly who you're talking. There was a guy.

It threw me into an existential thing. Ben, I'm not kidding. It literally did the same thing. It was a guy eating, like, have you ever seen like a cat that should have been put down? And they took, they didn't remove all its teeth because it attacked one of the grandchildren. Yeah.

And took an eye out. Yeah. And it's like gumming a piece of wet slime. They have to feed it. It was an old man with a piece of Popeye's chicken, and he was trying to gum the skin off of a thigh. And the chicken skin looks like his own skin. Yes.

So it's almost like out of the corner of your eye, it's like he's eating his own hand. Yes. Because he's the same tone and color. Same color. I'm like, sir, did they fry you? Yeah. Same viscosity.

Yes. Yeah. Same density. And I just watched him gum the skin off a chicken thigh. There's something that like not as a, like I don't even mean this in a racist way, but there is something that bothers me about. Of course. Hear me out on this.

Of course. You don't mean this way. There's something that it bothers me to look at a food court and everybody is racially ambiguous. Or I'm like there's not just a Chinese person. Like what the fuck? That's true. I can't tell anyone apart. You never see Laura Dern at the food court.

Yeah, it's a Chinese guy, but he looks like Michael Jackson. Yeah. Yeah. You never see a guy that looks like George Clooney having Mongolian barbecue at the food court. And that's what's annoying about it. But Devin, doesn't that piss you off? Like, especially in L.A. When you meet someone, they're like, my dad was Iranian and my mom was Filipino.

Yeah. It's like, well, this shouldn't be allowed. No, I know. 100%. But it is because, unfortunately, everyone just keeps having sex. And there's too many little rats that they need to occupy with the food court. The food court is for the rats of the family. Everyone at the food court is an extension of a family.

They're like the third or fourth, like, you know, brother or sister. They're all, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's a, it's hard to be around. Yeah, you should walk up to him and it's, like, a syringe full of heroin and just say, shoot up. Yep. Yeah, we saw, uh, the mall was full of little 12 year old Mexican kids who looked like Bobby Backel off for some reason. Yep. Just giant bowling ball stomachs. Being in Austin

was kind of funny because we were at the mall and I was like, oh fuck, there's like a bunch of like, it's like kids. Like it's like a bunch of kids like running away from shit. They're like doing, they're up to no good. There's a bunch of teenagers like running around. And I don't really, I don't see that in L.A. that much. You do

where you live, I guess. But I don't. I don't see that as often. When we were in Austin, I was like, oh, this is like, there There's, you know, there's just suburbs everywhere full of, like, children and, like, teenagers. And there's a lot of, like, two white girls and one black guy. There's a lot of, like, David's situations where I'm like, this black guy is probably going to kill you. Oh, the rapper that killed his girlfriend.

Yeah, I'm like, he's probably going to eat you or something. Like, I saw a lot of, like, two Florida Project bitches and then, like, one black guy. I love the idea of Devin, like, not letting his daughter date a black guy because he's like, I'm just like, I heard about David. He'll eat you. If you're going to kill her, have her back by 11. Have her body back by 11. She better hurt, yes.

I want to at least know what happened. If I can't see her face, you're in big trouble. I just don't hide what happened from me. The ambiguity would kill me. So let me know. I go, I know she's annoying. She's annoying as shit. Just don't leave her in your trunk for four years, please.

Yeah, so we went to, uh, the Cheesecake Factory Which is awful And it's kind of like Actually worse When you're in an area Where they don't care as much Yeah

In L.A Cheesecake Factory in L.A would not have like Treated us like that No You got sick You got sick They gave you the fucking E.

Coalai Arugula Yeah And then we went into We went into watch The Devil Wears Prada too Which isn't even a movie It's kind of like AI

It kind of looks like The whole screen Looks like it was bleached It looks like it was lit with somebody's iPhone light, just holding it up next to a camera. We don't think there was something wrong with the projector. Yep. Like, we had to go talk to somebody.

Then we just realized it looks like an MX commercial. That it's just a bad movie. Yeah, no, and nothing anyone said on screen was connecting, and we were, it immediately we just, we all got on our phones. We were on our phones for like an hour and a half. Like, when I watch these movies, I'm like, the main character's on their phone. Why am I not on my fucking phone? Yep.

And every scene, Ann Hathaway is reading something on her phone, showing someone something on Instagram she's learning and it's advancing the plot looking at a text it's the phone or she's on her laptop and she's like you know doing bigger work on her laptop and then the camera cuts to her laptop screen but she was dude this is what this it fucking drove me nuts it was like three scenes in a row at the very beginning where the plot was advanced because something was on the phone and then it cut to her on her laptop in her house and she was on Instagram on her desktop browser on her laptops. No one does.

You have to be a huge loser to be on Instagram on your desktop. And she also had, not to be racial again, it just more annoyed me how lazy it is. Her best friend in the movie is just a random

58-year-old black woman. Who was the young black woman in the first one, but now she's like fat as shit and looks like, you know, Lena Dunham. Lena Pork. Lena Duncans.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fug and stuck. Yeah, the movie was awful. I didn't see a second of it. You bet immediately went on his phone. No, I put my phone right up to my eyeballs.

I block out every pixel of the movie. I don't. Actually, I thought about going to the projectionist and asking him to turn the movie off because it was very, it was distracting me. Yeah, you go in there, his veins are open. He's been bleeding out for hours. Yeah, could you imagine being the projectionist at an AMC

and watching that like 50 times? No, man. I would start adding it in porn, like Fight Club. Just entertain myself. You and the projectionist. you're like can I get a refill of popcorn where's the popcorn

the projectionist would be saying that no Ben would be asking the projectionist for popcorn you're the popcorn guy right oh you're saying I think it's yeah you're the popcorn guy no I think the camera is like some Coca-Cola freestyle machine I haven't had access to you're like oh that's a new freestyle machine they have in Dubai right

are they slow rolling them in America now I didn't know that interesting Oh jays do you know what the ads are by the way off the top of your head? I don't fucking know. I'm sorry. Do you have a, our Lucy's? It might be Lucy. Do you have my Lucy's?

Um, I thought I gave it back to you, buddy. I thought I threw back there. I don't think you did, you scumbag. I stole them. I don't think I have, I think I gave him back to you by me. You actually, you're right. They're right next to me. Yeah, exactly right.

They're right next. They're literally right next to me. Yeah, but you accused me like a, well, you know, you accused me like a freak. I don't know. There's a, there's a history here. Let him read into something that's fake No, you know

I've been very upset at you Lately I'm gonna start completely false rumors about you Very upset I'm glad you guys are in a better mood now You're kind of being sour pusses earlier No, not true How so?

How so, Ben On the drive here Because I was so sick And you guys just hated everything And you were so negative You were a fucking sleepy bozo I couldn't I thought I was gonna shit my pants

I'm all out. You're all out of this. Well, you stole them from yourself, Devin. The loosies are all out. J's. You stole them from yourself. What the hell happened here? I'm sorry.

All right. Fuck. I'm going to kill myself. We might need to stop to get more batteries for the H-6 anyway. Oh, really? Really? Jesus. No, it might last.

I don't know. Oh, okay. I thought you were like, it's on its last legs. No, no. It might be fine. What an absolute shithole of a state, by the way. Just truly. Like, I can't believe that we have to keep coming out here.

It's one of the worst places that, like, anyone could imagine being on Earth. I know. Our plane touched down, and it was about 95 degrees and the humidity, I think. The dew point was, like, 74. Yeah. It was, like, close to, like, the temperature that it kills you at, the wet bulb, temp. The idea that people with money willingly live here is absolutely hilarious. to me. I know. We literally

landed, we walked off the plane and it felt like we were in a rainforest cafe or something. Yep. Yep. I think you can live anywhere if you start drinking at noon. And that's what everyone does. Yeah. That's what we've been forced to do. That's what we've done. That's why we were in a crappy mood. I had to drive. I couldn't

drink at noon. I was driving down there. I would happily be drinking right now if I could. Yep. No, and you will. And I will be. When we land in Austin in an hour, you'll be drinking. Hey guys, it's Jace here by himself or by myself.

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warning this product contains nicotine nicotine is an addictive chemical thank you lucy and now back to the rest of our long drive home bye Ben

I get the shakes I like that do you like the game stop girl do you like that devon the game stock she was the best buy girl now she's the game stop girl is that a real person or is that AI

no she's real a lot of like weaves are gooting to her. That's not real. Yeah, she's real. It's Riley, the GameStop girl. She was the best buy girl. She had black hair when she was the best by girl. Well, yeah, of course. I'd fucking fuck her brains out. Jesus, she took crass. Crasse. I would, I, people go, oh, I'd

fucking fuck her. I'd take her on a date. No, I wouldn't. I would take her on a date. No. Whenever people, whatever the, yeah, we get it, like a fucking 2007 Seth Rogan joke. If I saw that girl, I'd fucking be, I'd ask her if she'd be going to date with me. That's Seth Rogen's joke.

No, but it's like that that is in the same realm where like the whole thing was like, people would be like, oh, I'd fuck the shit out of her. And then, you know, he'd be like, I'd treat her well. He sucks. Well, that's, you know. I rule, though. It's kind of a whole. It's a good joke, actually.

He's great. And you're a king. But I'm a king somehow. I saw Seth Rogen on some talk show thing that. that didn't exist. Talking about not having kids? Yeah, and he goes, he goes, why did you have kids?

He goes, don't have kids. He goes, the world would be over in 30 years anyway. Ho, ho, ho, ho. A guy with no data or talking points, he just catastrophizes everything to justify his, like, you know, completely, you know, I mean, he's a worthless human being. He's beyond, like, when it comes to Hollywood actors,

there's no one more work. worthless than that guy. What does that guy do with his money and his free time? He makes little like grinders for his wheat. I make grinders that cost $85. Does he make little vases that you can pour your butt into after you smoke it or something? He makes something along those lines. Yeah, he makes something that like holds your butt plug and it's a it's a bong at the same time. He makes cuck chairs into bongs. I sculpted this chair and black guys can fuck your wife while you smoke weed on it. It fucking rules. Don't have kids. Make the boys.

I'm making the boys. Is he making the boys? Yeah, he's the big producer on the boys. Apparently he got killed on this week's episode. What it? What's the boys? It's an Amazon show, right? Yeah, the super, the big superhero movie. Yeah, it's the superhero show on Amazon.

Sounds very pizza gatecoded. It is apparently like they did like, the first few seasons were very like obviously like the main, the main bad guy is like Trump. And it was very like, kind of like lame and very obvious that it was Trump. And I, but I've never seen it. Never seen a second of it. Can't.

It's illegal. It's illegal for me to see a second of it. Because you'd freak that. If I saw a second of it, I'd kill myself. Yeah, it's very much like, it's like, what if superheroes were like raunchy? Like, that's the boys. So it's like a guy who's supposed to be Superman, but he's like, well, I love butt fucking. Ben, you've seen.

So he's still doing the regressive comic book shit of like, I love comic books and weed. Oh, yeah. I never grew up. Yeah. You've seen the meme of that one guy where he's like sitting and, and he starts like smiling and being like, oh man, I think people actually love me. Like he has that facial expression where it's like this famous, famous look where this like,

this guy that looks like he's a leader of something, he starts looking around and be like, oh, wow, everyone. Yeah, crowd starts cheering for him. Crowd starts cheering. He's like, oh my God, this is incredible. I think that's from the boys, right? It is from the boys, that's right. Devin, when you were at Aziz and Sari's house talking to Seth Rogen by the pool

and he was saying Tropic Thunder wasn't good because of the blackface stuff, you should have shoved them in the pool. Well, or threw him like down the Hollywood. Well, you want to know what I did? You should have impaled them on the age. I chained him up and I poured milk on his head. And I called him an N-word. lover.

Was that wrong? Well, and Ziz and Zari watched from 900 feet away. And I looked at Aziz and I said we're going to turn you into non tonight. At his own home.

You have this crazy. People like the Native American guy at the end of one battle after another. I always I always wondered why no one like gave me what I wanted after that night.

No one really talked to me after the night. But I think maybe it's because I looked at a Z's and I go, we're going to turn you into non. And you said, a-o. I go, a-o and a-beary. It's bad at comedy. Were you there with I. No, no, I don't think I knew her then.

That's how quickly, that's how quickly absolute nobodies can come into the fold and make it. Is that I didn't even know her then. I thought you went to a shooting range with I. I did. I went to a shooting range with her, Jack, a million. another fucking very, not famous, but I don't know, people in the industry. And you said you thought she was a,

somebody's like sister. I thought she was, I thought she was like Jack's like, like family member. She was just a normal, boring person that I was like, oh yeah, you must just be like Jack's cousin or something.

Yeah. I had no clue it was going on. And then 15 weeks later, she like had an Emmy. Oh yeah. She owns this freeway. Yeah, every time we do a live show,

we have to give her 10%. She owns show business. Yeah But yeah That was a That was an interesting night I remember Evan

Who's the who's the Seth Rogen's guy His buddy Evan Goldberg Evan Goldberg Was like Splayed out In front of a fireplace

Like in front of a fire Going And he literally looked It was like a cartoon character Like he had He was on the ground Like Might as well have had

Like I think he had like a mink coat right his neck and there was like a few women listen talking to him and i remember somebody led me in there was like and this is they like introduced me to him and i was like oh wow nice to meet you and he just smiled at me like a you know guy like in a cult like he just had this like happy you know not in the moment look like he was like he looked at me like he was getting sucked off already it was just fascinating it was a fascinating night and i remember seth rogan at one point being like are you hungry

Have you eaten tonight? To you? Yep. Wow. And I was like, no, not really. He was like, let's get some food. I haven't even eaten. He goes, you're like Middle Eastern, right?

He goes, aren't you like a fucking sand boop? Aren't you a beautiful sand in? No, honestly, it was an amazing night. I've told the story a million times. It's so boring. But like, it was the funniest part was like when we went outside at the end. And then the real people started getting arriving. the real people started arriving

and I remember Aziz walked up to the circle I was in with Seth Rogan and he goes like hey buddy

and Seth Rogan looked at him like that way it was a chore that he had to do that day that he forgot that he had he looked at him like it was like oh I forgot I had to get toilet paper today I had to talk to Nan

let me go to the store Yeah, well, it was also he was coming fresh off the not rape charges. It was, yeah, fresh off that. It was like his first public appearance post being bad at fucking. Yeah, the entire party, Aziz was wandering around the outside of his house, like, staring at us, staring at everybody with his hands behind his back. Like, he looked like a butler. He looked at the Mater D. You just start handing him empty glasses.

He actually was acting that way. But yeah, anyway, that was that was it. I'm never just leaving, but. I heard that was a fake rape story they put out because the real rape story was really bad and they thought it was going to come out. You did say that afterwards. Yes, I remember you saying that. So you think that they... His team designed a thing that would be like pretty dismissed by people.

Like, oh, it was a bad date. Yeah, and they made sure to post it on Jezebel and all that stuff. It's like, oh, I wanted red wine, but he gave me white and... Babe.net, I think it was on. It was Babe. Yeah, something like that. So then they would lose all credibility and when the one came out that, you know, He had like a socket wrench or something.

And, you know. Oh, wait. So you think actually something really real happened? That's what the story is? That's what you heard? That, like, they made it seem like it was absolutely like some nothing thing. I mean, look at him. But he actually did something?

I mean, I think if you gave that guy three shimp, like three flute. What did he do? Like, I don't know, man. I mean, that guy. He asked her to flush. I could imagine if I was a white woman, right? Sure. And I came home.

Of course. And, you know, the lights are all off. It's late at night. Sure. And I closed the door. Of course. I throw my purse to the side and the keys. Uh-huh.

If I looked up and I saw Aziz's already looking down at me like it's hereditary or something like that. Oh, yeah. I would not be surprised at all. Me neither. That's true. I would look up at Aziz, pinned to the wall with those big eyes of his. And I would say, just make it quick. good point

before he descends all right make me chop my own head off go ahead because these guys don't know how to get pussy and then they get famous

yeah but just because they can then get pussy because they're famous doesn't mean they know how to get pussy yeah so that was the problem

I think he put on Seinfeld right or something and then he did a fish hook thing where he stuck his finger in her mouth and was yanking her head

yes I forgot about the fish hook thing he tried to like fist her mouth or something but this is the fake story. Right. But the real story is he shot a woman's pussy with a bazook. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, probably.

He did like a Boys in the Hood execution on a woman's pussy. I think those guys get drunk enough. Their eyes go black and just anything goes. Yeah, they wake up and it's like the horse head and the bed and the godfather. There's just blood and they're screaming. I think a lot of those like Silicon Valley type guys are like the like the Thomas Middle Ditches.

Then they all get in trouble too. Yeah, Thomas. Crazy weird rape stuff. Thomas Middletch had the one where he went on Conan and tried to do like a funny bet about how he talked his wife into being in an open relationship and she didn't want to be. And I think it's the other time like Conan's just been like, oh my, you're a terrible guy.

You're a piece of shit. Like, fuck you. Yeah, Middle Ditch was big into like, you know, just fucking like lots of other women with his wife. He was going to that like got got like got, like outed for being like the rape bar. Yeah. Or whatever.

Apparently he was huge into that scene of just going to the rape bar while his wife cried at home. Yeah. Did he break up with her eventually too? Yeah, he left. Which always, yeah, of course. There we go. Beautiful.

He strong armed her. He strong armed his wife who was with him before he was famous in making money. Yep. Into an open relationship. She didn't want because she wanted to be with him still. It's a great story. And then he broke up with her so he could go to the. leather rape club.

Yep. And weehoe. Yep. Yep. It's a beautiful story. And what is it? He's one of those guys that actually, in a weird way, like, is kind of like, like, lived the dream where he was in a show and then he just stopped.

Does he do anything? I'm pretty sure you got soft canceled. Yeah, he got. Oh, that's why he doesn't do anything. Yeah, he got a soft cancel. Exactly. Because of the rape club story. Oh, come on.

The rape club. Please. He was in an open relationship with his fucking wife. That's what it sounded like to me. I've heard stuff. What have you heard? Well, I have too. He raped my mom.

He raped Yoshi. What do you want for me? He saw Yoshi's big pussy on a walk and he raped him. He raped my dog as well. My mom and my dog. But come on, let him be. Look, we got on all of this because I was talking about the girl from the commercial with. Oh, the goth girl from, uh.

No, she's not really goth. It's like a Twitch type thing, you know? Right. That's going on. But the goth stuff's inflated with e-girl shit now, unfortunately. For goth people, I'm sorry. That your entire culture is now just, you're a fleshlight. That sucks.

Right. You can't, when people think of vampires, they just think about, like, you know, their dick and balls getting bounced on crazy. They go, well, that's a fleshlight with BPD. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know the shit's crazy. It's a hago adjacent. Exactly. And, um.

But she was working for, she was a goth for Best Buy. And then they stole her her way. Is that what happened? Oh, yeah. So she was the Best Buy girl. I forget her name. We said it earlier. Now she's the GameStop girl.

And, um, this is a weird thing about, I don't know if I've ever said this out loud, actually. What? I'm gay. Do you guys, do you guys see people in a T-E- TV show and you say this person is not that attractive. Yes. But when it comes to commercials, you go, it's a different, like, grading system. Oh, 100%.

Well, like, you see a mom just doing a Swiffer thing. And you go, you go, yeah, sure. Like, she's just like sweeping a thing in a commercial. She was in a TV show, she would be, you know. Nothing. Nothing. Put a bag on a house. But you go, this is commercial pussy.

In the world of commercial. you go, well, you take what you can get. Oh my God, Ben. Yes, you're right. You know what I mean? I know exactly what you mean. People do this in comedy where the female comedian's not that hot. The female comedian in the world is a three, but in comedy is like a seven. Yeah.

When it comes to a commercial, I would fuck the Pinesaw lady. I would literally fuck a woman who looked like Danny Glover. Yeah. If she's in a, I think it's, is it because it puts it in a certain context for you? Yes. Yeah, because that's how you're thinking about it. Yeah, like she's just. you're actually not, you go, oh, you're a commercial lady.

You're not that important. Yeah, and it's also like, you because you kind of look like, like shit. But it's also like, okay, so it's a lady doing the dishes. Like I'll just, yeah, I'd walk up behind her. I put her head through. I think you go right here. Yeah, sorry. You look like the best woman that does the dishes.

Right, exactly. Go on, Jay's. How would you do it to her? No, yes. I'm sorry. I'm literally driving through a ping pong machine right now. These stupid fucking Texas highways make no sense. Yeah, I would drop, I would walk up behind the woman doing dishes and I would

put her head into the fridge like Walter White. So it puts it in a context where she's hot. As you do. Exactly. But if she's in a TV show, I'd hit her with a drone stray. Yeah. No, there's totally. There's a,

there's a ranking system to this. And there's levels to my balls, like, you know, loading up full of jizz. Well, it's on you guys this the other day because you guys have never worked in an office that if you're in an office for eight hours a day. Jesus. I know. We're going to die doing this.

It's like black eyes. No, so we're driving into the Gulf of Mexico right now. I literally like hydroplained for a second. This is so fucking stupid. This is the worst city on earth. This city fucking sucks. I literally wouldn't be surprised that we drove into a giant pit volcano right now. But if you work in an office all day, eight hours a day, if there is one woman who isn't super fat and has like sea cups, you're like, that is, that's like Salma Hyac in 1999.

That's the hottest a woman's ever been. That makes sense because you're confined to a certain space for hours at a time. Yeah. The commercial thing, I wonder how much of it is us just being goy cattle and saying, well, she had the Snickers approval. Oh. Walmart signed off on her. Of course she's got the goods. The beam works on us so well.

We don't even recognize the beam anymore. Correct. You're saying it's a this is water situation. We say, what is bean? That's correct. Yeah. That's correct. We've been going to beamed so hard.

Yeah. If then, mind you, go to Netflix, turn on any of these shows that my wife watches. Sure. The Virgin, what is it, like, the Virgin River and stuff like that? Yeah. The Virgin River, the raped mountain. Yeah.

Yeah. Poo-poo in Paris. Yeah. Yeah. I'll see on the show, like, just a white woman drinking white wine. I'm like, she's very ugly. Mm-hmm. Now slap on the top of that

Make it a wine commercial You know Make it I don't know wine But make it a barefoot wine commercial Now we're cooking Now we're talking Now we're now we're working with something Now we can have a good time

Yeah Make her a mom and a chunky cheese commercial And I'm all there Yeah No actually I understand where you're coming from With that I love I mean women and commercials are actually like the greatest way to like a like start up like a like a boner

because it's because because there's something there's something hot about like they're they're not allowed to actually do it so it's the restriction you know example devon melissa vintraub in the in the project hell mary not that hot in project helmet oh yeah right no it's not at hot at all who cares actually you're like you suck stinks kind of you're born You're not even doing anything. You start getting angry, actually, at her lack of, like, giving in. It's like watching somebody that's been cornered for years, and they just refuse to take it off.

And you go, all right, well, we're going to just finally kill you. We're going to put you in a big bag and shoot you into space. This is absurd. Yeah, you stay. I'm the toolbox killer. No, but she's hot in the AT&T commercials because she's not, you're just, it's a phone commercial. And you go, oh, my God, that was special. Like, that happened out of nowhere.

I didn't know she had those knockers on her. Yeah, yeah, you want to lock the AT&T store up and trap her inside. But then you see her actually try to show herself in Project Tale Mary. And you go, oh, you actually are not even, you didn't even know how to be like a Russian woman. She was terrible. Her accent is terrible. Which you are. You are a Russian woman.

Her accent in the movie. Isn't she playing a Russian woman in the movie? She's terrible. She is Russian. She's not even good at playing a Russian. And I think, I imagine she's like from there or something on the. You can't be great in anything. your tits are that big.

No. And there's been no great women in history with jugs that big. Yep. I get why women want to come. Christina Hendrix is the closest anyone's ever come. Sure, but you have to, usually if you have tits that big, you can kind of coast through life. I mean, these are big weather balloons that will carry you across the county wherever you want to go. Well, that's true.

But also, I've seen a few women, like, while we're out here that have, like, massive jugs, but they, I don't know. They just, they kind of look, they just look a little fucked up. and it's not helping them it's just not helping them it does suck yeah I know what you mean but I like gals like that really big tits and they look fucked up are you guys do you guys even know what I'm talking about

there was a woman that kept walking back and forth at the cheesecake factory that you got food poisoned at in Barton Creek oh I think I had my back turn to her there was a woman with some of the biggest tits I've ever seen but she had like two jackets on but they were like you could I could tell she was literally like in pain

with how big they were She's screaming. She's holding herself up. You should give her like a Vietnam veteran hat. Like she should be able to have like a like veteran of the Korean War. Yeah, exactly. It says F cups like 1987 to 2026. Yeah.

And I walk up and I go, thank you so much for your service. And I and I salute and I have a full boner at the same. And then you get a discount. Exactly. And I go, ma'am, it's on me. It would be an honor to help out a hero today. I think I saw that lady in a different part of the mall, Devin.

I think I think I think you guys know what I'm talking about. They were insane. They were insane. They were insane. I wanted it to point it out to you guys, but I'd already pointed out a bunch of fat women. And by the way, they weren't showing. They were fully under two, like, shirts. Like, she was not showing cleavage or anything.

Two shirts. But she had, like, a lip piercing, and she was with, like, some other woman that was, like, maybe her titty handler. And I don't know what they were up to. But, like, they kept wandering through that cheesecake factory. And I looked at her and I go, that's actually a tough life. Yeah, that kind of stinks. She genuinely seemed affected.

This is so funny to be like, I finally had empathy for a woman because I was staring at her tits for two months. Maybe the first time I ever felt that. I go, oh, a woman might have some difficulty sometimes. Because she's got such a tough life, because legitimately she is ripping vertebrae in her back. Like, she's always in pain. And if she gets them reduced, like guys who reek of come, will curse her until the day she's dead.

No, I mean, that's the thing. I had this moment when I watched her walk through the Cheesecake Factory as we were eating our Cheesecake Factory food. And I go, oh, that looks hard. But also, if you ever were to change that, I think I'd annihilate you. No, I would find you. I'd find you and kill you.

I'd hunt you down. Because they're huge and great. Like, they were. so huge. It's like you actually, it's like, it's like you can't, you can't tell like the, you know, the, one of the greatest wonder of the world. Like, you gotta like cut this out.

Like, you have a, you have a special, you have a gift. You were gifted. So you have your back needs to hurt for life. You have a Lamborghini on your chest. Yes. That's going to hurt. It's very heavy. I'm sorry. I like, I also like, what is this world in which you get your tits fixed and you, you know, you like, fucking come up with an equation that like

helps life. Yeah. No, you're nothing. You're a nothing. Like we all are But I don't have those tits You think I can fucking get rid of those tits? I don't have anything to offer bitch You have a you have an actual Paul McCartney song on your chest You have something that makes life a little bit worth like living

Yes, Exactly. No, I mean that really fucking like Jard me Yeah She had Have you ever been with a woman with breasts that big though? Devin like actually

Um, not like, I mean sexually. Yeah, yeah. I mean, one, I've been with one chick had massive tits that I was with once. But, but they weren't like that. That lady had like next level tits. Yeah. Yeah. They were laying in her pasta, if I remember correctly. They were. They were. She was actually, she actually dug into her titty. She's wiping butter on them. Yeah. A little pat of butter. She was slicing her nipple with a knife and fork. Yeah. But sometimes I've, I've had like something like that before. It's almost too much. to handle actually once you get it. And I realized

I'm like a car, I'm like a dog chasing a car. You know? Yeah. Like I catch it and I go, oh, I don't, I'm depressed now. I don't know what the point of life is. No, it's like, it's like when three people come home and the dog loves all of them equally. And it doesn't know what's to do and it flips out. It keeps, it keeps doing like circles. It's shaking. And jumping on, jumping on everyone's leg, but like for half a second at a time. Falling down, fucking its backup. It has no clue what to do. Yeah,

exactly. It's hitting the corner. on its back. Hitting the corner of the glass coffee table with its back. Because it's just so happy. It's so excited and it can't even focus on anything. Yeah. Because they come out and it's like you almost want to go like, oh boy. I saw it. Jeez.

I saw it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we'll be back in like an hour. Yeah. We're going to the mothership tonight. Going back to the mothership. All right.

Let's go. Let's do it. Not. Back to our hometown club. Getting drunk again. again. Back to our home club. This will be our third time at the mothership, actually.

I really need some nicotine. We just got an invite. I know. We'll get you there. We'll get back to the hotel. I've got Lucy's in the hotel. We got an invite and Ben, tell him who it was. Just show Joseph Rogan.

We call him Joseph. Joseph Rogan. I don't think, if I think if I go to the mothership and stay out to get until 4 a.m. Tonight, I don't know if I'll be. Well, think about your children. I don't know. We can talk. We don't have to talk about it.

No, we don't need to do this. No, let's talk. Let's talk shop. Yeah. Our fans are trustworthy. We saw that tonight. We saw that tonight. We saw that earlier tonight.

They're great. Yeah, we saw our fans starting a race war for no reason. It's all good. That guy had a coming. No, he did have it coming. He did. And I'm glad we hung him up. Yeah.

Yeah. I know literally like if a guy was walking past that club. They would just see a door open, a black guy get thrown out. And a bunch of white people go and stay out. Get out of here. Oh, yeah. That one, that sucked. I didn't love that. But, you know, it was a black guy that was triggered by us hating Avengers movies. Yeah, it was fine. It was final. So actually is he black. We don't care at all. It was just more. It was more just the stuff like, you know. No, it was, yeah, whatever. And then some fans got like very intense. Some fans got involved. And they started to be like, shut up, stop fucking yelling.

And then it turned into like, oh, boy. Yeah. Well, then some fans got intense after the show, too. Yes. Outside. We were doing, like, meet and greed. Yeah. Yeah.

Guys just, like, grab you and they're like, please tell me. Tell me it's going to be okay. And I go, it's not, man. And they go, I know. Thank you for being honest. Yeah. Yeah. They just walk away.

No, I mean, there's, you know. We go to places and sometimes the people that, like, work there like this is my last night on earth I'm like don't you work here I know there was people who worked there who were like Neil Hamburger like levels of just dropping whiskey glasses

shattering everywhere I kind of feel like I need a shit again do you do we have to pull over somewhere is there another bucky uh oh look there's literally there's literally sign for bucky duck duck bucky 43 miles

only 43 miles This is a gas station right here. No, no, keep going. We're on a roll right now. You're getting me. Okay. I just wasn't sure if you were about to blow shit out right now. Oh, that one's closed, actually.

I saw that that gas station before and I took a nap. Really? Yeah, seriously, I pulled over there because I had, I, I, I fall asleep. I have fell asleep behind the wheel like three or four times now and I haven't died. Mm-hmm. And that was one of those times where I knew I was going to fall asleep and I had slept behind the wheel like two weeks previous and I pulled over back there and I slept. I leaned my chair back in my car and I slept for two hours straight. Yeah. It felt great. I couldn't believe I slept that long. Well,

that could have been a full circle because we could have pulled over and you could have shot in that same exact spot on the ground. It would have been a real circle of life type thing. Yeah, it would have been beautiful. Yeah. I love seeing gas stations or little liminal spaces in the world and having that was actually cool. We just passed. That was like a cool. cool gas station. I couldn't believe... I was charming. See, why do cops do this faggot shit where they park next to each other and jack each other off? I think that's

exactly what they're doing, then they're jacking each other. They're blowing each other. They're blowing each other. You're blowing each other. You can't am I? They literally suck on each other's body cams and make each other come. Being the cops should be so cool, but it's so gay. On paper. The coolest job that there is.

Yeah, you should be, your judge dread in theory. In theory. You should be like a complete badass. I think Okay, this is an unpopular opinion amongst woke people that listen to the show. Sure. I'm just going to say it. Motorcycle cops kick ass. Motorcycle cops are badass.

The ones in L.A. have criss-cross shotguns on the back, like Terminator style. Yeah. They have the big visors. They go in and out of traffic. They kick ass. They're really cool. And I'm very scared of them. They are very cool.

Why do they have the big Armenian hip pants for some reason? You know what I'm talking about? Like the Jinkos. Yeah, they give them like Jinko jeans for no reason. Uh, they're cool. The only thing is every motorcycle cop I've interacted with has been a, like, complete gaping asshole. Yeah, no, I actually don't know what Bill was talking about. Like, they're like the gayest guys.

No, no, I just mean, like, the drip. The whole thing is kick ass. Yeah, the drip is great, but that's how much they suck is that they, they, everybody still hates them. Yeah, they dress up like they're a part of something much bigger. Okay, but they don't do anything. Okay, but they literally give, like, speeding and parking tickets. Yeah, I know, but, like, the Master Chief, like, Master Chief kicks. ass, but if he took off his helmet and he looked like a smiling friend's character,

you would think he's gay. Yeah, Master Chief kicks ass because he doesn't stop me and then scream at me for going one mile over the speed limit. And he doesn't scream at me because he's five foot four and hates himself. I'm very scared of cops on motorcycles. I hate cops. I hate cops. I hate cops.

If I see a cop and he's not after a black guy, I'm terrified. I don't know what's going on. That's why I get mad at the motorcycle guys. They've yelled at me like I'm black before for no reason. I've had motorcycle cops literally give me like the boy. Like license of registration boy. Is there any position of authority that is cool? Like the DEA sucks.

They're gay. The FBI is gay. The CIA is gay. They're all gay. Yeah, literally. A position of authority that's actually okay. Where you go, yeah, you kick ass. You're cool.

Would you count a firefighter as a position of authority? they seem to like kind of have big egos and they I feel like firefighters are like narcissists yeah 100% they literally are they literally are like I'll be the guy who fights fires you know I think it's very rare and like few and far in between but I think like occasionally there's like a good principal right like of a school where people go like a coach carter type people are like I really loved my school and my principal that's fair maybe a librarian yeah or librarian yeah I think it's in like I mean, you know, every other, like, every other realm is, like, not really, like, helpful to the growth of people. It's just, like, they're just, you know, they have a job and power over, you know, adults and they're going to abuse it.

But if you have, there's occasionally somebody that, like, runs children that, like, I think is a good person. Like, actually gives a shit and doesn't like them. Yeah, and actually cares. Yeah. And isn't a pedophile. Yeah, it's a little few and far between. It's a few and far between, but I don't know. I'm trying to. I think anyone like is in power over adults.

I think you just kind of start being like, fuck off. I'll fucking right to the camp. Who cares? I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll shoot you. You pull me over.

Some Orthodox priests are cool on YouTube. They're kind of badass. They got like a monk thing going on. They have cool beards. This guy better not run this. Yeah, keep going. He's fine. Jesus.

I mean, literally people have done that. There was, I mean, there was a couple trucks you were sleeping that passed us in the shoulder during. a thunderstorm in traffic for no reason. Yeah. People just want to die. No, everyone out here pulls, they pull into a lane at the worst possible time.

Everyone's driving a, the biggest truck you've ever seen so they could transport Bucky's Nuggets to their home. Yeah, they're driving a Chevy motherfucker. No, it's, um, been upsetting. It's been an upsetting drive. It's an upsetting time and upsetting place.

I don't like that person that just passed a, Fuck them. You can't even see them. Can't see them, but fuck them. No, I really hate that guy. I really hate that guy. I hated every single in the Buckees, every single gigantic truck

that looked cleaner than any car I've ever driven. Yep. Just to go and get Beaver Nuggets. We were stuck in a purgatory of Buckees earlier. When we pulled in, we got gas, and then that guy's car alarm kept going off. For about 12 minutes.

Yep. And it kept going. And no one did anything about it. And everyone just kept wandering around. And everyone inside the fucking Buckees looked like they fucking, they were, everyone was like mentally deranged and retarded. And there was a few people that, you know, looked like they were in relationships with ATVs. And Ben was shitting his pants inside the Buckeys. We couldn't find him.

You and me both have vicious emotional hangovers. And, and Jason. I are also like we're going on like day four of like I can't even believe I'm still doing this I can't believe I literally can't believe I'm still doing this I can't believe I'm still hung over and doing podcasts and we might need to continue it later we might have to continue later I don't know and it's it's 1230 in the morning and we're in the middle of Texas it's 1230 in the morning we might be pulling like another 18 hours shift and we might need to pull in and like you know yeah like I literally might have to cancel my flight back that I was looking for

to like it was a wet pussy. I was so excited to get on my flight back and not speak to anyone. You guys are sour pusses. Ben, cut that. I'm a bit of a crappy patty right now. Ben, I'm gonna, how about we give you a job? You've been doing nothing but having a great time

shitting out of your ass. Throwing up out of your mouth. I know. You, you fucking sitting on Easy Street. The bathroom is so, the bathroom of our hotel is so funny, It literally smells like shit out of an ass. There's a, there's a, there's a pair, there's a burger from P. Terry's that's why, that's, that you took one bite out of and then started vomiting.

And that's been sitting there on the counter for the last, like, you know, 27 hours. So the, so the entire room smells like open burger and like shit and piss and vomit. It's so bad. I know. It literally smells like an iced attention. It's like a fascinating combination, actually. Like no one would ever expect that smell. Yeah.

It's like what a concentration camp smelled like. Yeah. Just like fat and shit and blood. Patreon.com slash lemon party. We're going into the Patreon now. Okay. Bye, everybody. I don't even care.