Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - Enjoy Your 15 Minutes Because It's Gonna Be Up Soon

Episode Date: June 4, 2024

You guys asked and I answered. We cover a lot of questions regarding my kids, making friends in your 30s, getting over a broken heart, how weird fame is, jealousy, social media in a relationship, and how I'm able to trust being vulnerable again.A word from our sponsors:Nutrafol - For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering listeners ten dollars off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter promo code HONEST.Meta - Tap into the people on Facebook to fuel the things you're interested inLulu's - Visit Lulus.com and use code HONEST at checkout for 20% off your first purchase. New customers only. Terms apply. Bon Charge - Go to boncharge.com and use code HONEST to save 15% off my favorite Red Light Face Mask and other wellness products.Produced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. This is Let's Be Honest with Kristen Cavallari, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality TV, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing. Welcome in to Let's Be Honest. I'm your host, Kristen Cavallari, and I am so excited to be here. I hope you guys are enjoying your summer. And I'm excited to be back for a solo episode. You guys submitted questions, and I always love reading y'all's questions because they are pretty funny sometimes. And a lot of them are similar. So it makes it fun. But yeah. So thank you for submitting questions

and let's jump in. Okay. So we're going to talk about the kids here first a little bit. Okay. So first question is, do you have help with the kids? Being a working mom is tough. Being a working mom is hard. Yeah, I do. So I didn't for a long time. When I got a divorce, I didn't have any help with my kids because I had them half the time. So I didn't want any help with them because I figured I could just do everything that I needed to do on the week that I didn't have them. But I have my kids more now. So when I had my kids full time, I got my kids full time Christmas actually, and had them full time for three months. So during that time, I did. I had a girl come four days a week, pick them up from school, and then would stay for a couple hours. Because honestly, my kids hate taking the bus, which I don't understand because

I loved taking the bus as a kid. So if I pick my kids up from school, I have to leave my house at two 20. I mean that like, cause the car rider car rider line, you sit there for like fucking 35 minutes. And so that's early to have to end your day. So that was tough for me. So I have a girl coming and she's picking them up from school and then they get home around three 30 and then she usually stays till five, which is just nice because it gives me a little extra time just to get some stuff done. And then that's it. Just four days a week Fridays. I always do. And you know, I mean, sometimes it's not like it's a pretty flexible schedule. Sometimes we have stuff going on, too.

We were balancing a lot of sports in the springtime. And so, you know, she wouldn't come if we had games and practice and stuff. There was no point. So, yes. And then this summer, I do have the same girl, Chandler. I freaking love Chandler. I'm so thankful for Chandler. She is coming and helping out again a few days a week, just, you know, for a few hours.

But again, it's just kind of flexible. She's my babysitter. So like if, if I'm going to go to dinner or something too, like she'll stay, like, it's a pretty, just like fluid schedule. There's no kind of set schedule. So that's kind of it. But you know, also my kids aren't, they're not little where it's like, I need someone all the time. Like my kids are pretty independent and self-sufficient. Like they can just kind of do their own thing now, which is also nice. So, you know, I don't really need someone. What age will you let your kids date? This is kind of something I haven't really thought about. Well, Jackson, little Casanova, he'll like date, like he'll like go and hang out with his little girlfriend with a parent around or like kind of,

you know, off to the side. But it's not like a date date, right? Like he's 10. It's that's not that serious. Like really date, I'd say probably like eighth grade would be my guess. I think that was when I kind of started dating. So yeah, I mean, I guess we have to see how it goes. Cam is about to be in middle school. He's gonna be in sixth grade in the fall. So I think that's kind of when like crushes and all that stuff kind of starts to amp up. But I still think sixth grade is way too young to like date. I would say like, like, I think I went on my first date, like to dinner with my boyfriend, Johnny and eighth grade. So probably around there would be my guess. What are the kids into these days? So my boys, they just, you know, in the springtime here,

they were playing flag football, which they both love. I love flag football. I think it's really fun. So they were doing that. They're my sports guys. You know, they're both doing a basketball camp this summer. And they're just, that's it. You know, they're sports boys. They love swimming,

you know, just playing basketball right now with their friends. We have a go-kart. I'm on 28 acres and we have a go-kart. So they like cruise around and they have fun doing that. Sailor loves riding horses. So she does a lot of that. She's also really into Legos and she's good at Legos. She is so good at Legos. She's eight and she does them for like, you know, 14 and up and stuff. I'm really impressed with some of the Legos that she has put together. So Saylor's also like, she's pretty girly right now. She's really into makeup and you know, like she has her little press on nails that she's into. So she's like in that phase too, which is, it's really cute and fun. So why is making friends in your thirties so hard? You know, it really kind of is. Although I will

say I've actually made some of my better friends in my thirties. So I think the trick with the thirties is that you have to just be patient. You can't rush it. You can't force a friendship, but I actually think you can make some of your best friends in your 30s. I have two friends in Chicago who I met in a mommy and me class with Jackson. So I guess that was late 20s, but still who I still keep in touch with, who I just love. And then two of my best friends out here I met, I mean, just probably three or four years ago. And so and I met them, you know, through we all have kids together at school, but it'll happen. I think I think a nice way to meet some friends is through school.

But, you know, it's different when you're like in high school and your teen, you know, your teens and your 20s and stuff when you're going out all the time and you're doing a lot more stuff, you know, it's it's so much easier to meet people. I also think when we get older, we don't have as much time. So the people that we do decide to spend time with, we want them to be, you know, like-minded people or people that we really enjoy and like, we're like, I hung out with some people in my early twenties that like, I would never, I would never hang out with them now. Like, I think the pool just gets smaller when we get older because we have more boundaries and expectations. And I also think that's a good thing. I would rather have five amazing, loyal, great friends than 15 mediocre friends. So I think that's also part of it. You really need like one or two really good friends. I really, I really

think that. So that is, it's a, it's a very real thing. Okay. How are you setting up your kids for financial success? So I think a big thing is just quite honestly, not giving my kids whatever they want. It's not saying yes to everything. It's teaching them how to appreciate the value of a dollar and also learning how to work for what they need. I was not given everything growing up when I lived with my mom and I love my mom for this now, but she really shouldn't give me anything like anything. And it used to drive me crazy. And then I moved in with my dad who threw money at me. And I remember feeling really guilty about taking my dad's money. And I went and got a job in high school because I wanted to make my own money. I didn't want to take my dad's money. And that's probably because I wasn't used to it, right? Like my mom had raised me where, you know, money just doesn't grow on trees. Like it kind of taught me that if

I wanted something, I was going to have to make it happen for myself, which I am really thankful for that lesson. Um, because I think that's kind of what's instilled my drive and made me always kind of figure out like how to take care of myself and make money from an early age. And so I think it's, it's that it's, if you want something, you got to work for it, that kind of a thing. And then when they're old enough, like in high school, I want them to all have a job a hundred percent. I'm not just going to give my kids whatever they want at all. Cause I think that, I think that's the worst thing you can do. Do you have any farm animals? I have eight chickens and a couple of them are silky chickens. If you guys don't know what silky chickens are, you should look them up because they are the cutest chickens

on the planet. They're a little bit smaller and they're really fluffy and they almost look like little like Pomeranian dogs or something. They're so freaking cute. So I've got a couple of those. I just love these little silky chickens. And then I have four beehives. So I have my own honey. And with the hives, what they do is they pull the honey once a year. And last year, it was last fall, they pulled 200 pounds of honey from my hives, which actually it is a lot, but it sounds like more than it really kind of is. However, it's lasted me the whole year. And that was what I gave everyone for Christmas gifts. I gave everyone at uncommon James. I gave them some honey teacher gifts, all my friends, anyone who comes over,

I'm like laying honey and eggs on them. I don't know, a chicken coop, a greenhouse, and my beehives were always kind of a dream of mine. So that's been, that's been really fun for me, but that's it. I don't have any more animals. I, because I can't take care of one more living thing. I have three dogs. I have three kids. You know, it's like, I'm, I'm maxed out. Sailor would love a horse. I think, you know, a mini horse at some point would be so great. And she's so good with animals that I know she would take really good care of a horse, but I just, I just can't do it right now. Maybe one day when my life isn't so busy, if I had more time to just like focus on tending to the animals. I also don't have someone to help me with that. Like, I guess it would be different if I had, you know, like a house manager or property manager or whatever

to kind of help with that stuff. But I don't have anyone like I'm cleaning my chicken coop. My kids are cleaning the chicken coop. Like, you know, I don't have like a whole staff of people to help me with that stuff. So. All right, you guys, let's talk about Nutrafol. I've been taking this now for more than six months and I've noticed such a difference with my hair. Also, if you follow me on Instagram, I've posted my before and afters and those speak for themselves. I had a lot of breakage about a year and a half ago and I've been growing out my layers and I've really noticed improved hair growth. And I've been able to grow out a lot of my layers, which makes me so happy. I've even turned a bunch of my friends and my family members onto Nutrafol as well. Nutrafol is the number one dermatologist

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It boosts collagen and elastin production. Since I've been using the red light face mask from Boncharge, I've seen a noticeable difference in fine lines and wrinkles. People have been giving me compliments on my skin. Bonn Charge also has other amazing products such as low blue light bulbs, blue light glasses, and EMF protection products, which you guys know I love. Bonn Charge products are H-A-S-F-S-A eligible, providing up to 40% off. Go to bondcharge.com and use coupon code honest to save 15%. That's B-O-N-C-H-A-R-G-E.com and use coupon code honest to save 15%. What's the best advice you could give a woman with a broken heart? And there's another question,

which is similar. I need your biggest advice for girls who are losing sleep over a man. I need your mentality. So similar, but I think the best advice for someone with a broken heart is to feel it, to feel every emotion that comes your way. My divorce was the first time in my life I told myself I wanted to feel everything, the good, the bad, the ugly. It was the first time in my life I wasn't going to push an emotion away. I wasn't going to run from it or push it down. I was going to sit in it because that's where you learn and grow. So for me, what that meant was journaling a lot, reading certain books, finding my spirituality. That really helped looking at the bigger picture and really looking at it from a lens of like, why is this here? What is it trying to teach me? Because I think we can learn something from every breakup, every heartbreak. There's something there for us. And that's it. And just knowing it's going to take time, knowing that it will end. It's always

temporary, right? You always look back and you're like, God, that seemed like the world was ending and I was never going to be okay. And then you're like, but I got through it. I survived. And then you're stronger and better on the other side of it. But it's allowing yourself some grace and just knowing that it takes time. And in the same breath, it's staying busy. It's getting your closest friends around you and doing fun stuff. Or if that means you're laying in bed all day crying, I think do that too. Like it's important to do all the things. I also think having a friend who you can vent to a thousand times a day, if you need to, like a friend who doesn't get sick of you talking about your situation is so important. That's Justin for me. And I am so thankful that I had him during my divorce and my whole fucking

dating escapades. You know, like he's the best friend on the planet. You need someone who isn't like, oh my God, you want to talk about Jake again? Like get over it. Like, no, a friend is supposed to be someone who has empathy for you, who can sit in it with you. Like a really good friend is like, this is happening to us. Like we are heartbroken. Like that fucking dick broke up with both of us kind of a vibe that makes such a difference. When you have a friend who's in it with you, you don't feel alone. And I think a lot of times the hardest part about a breakup is feeling so isolated. You just feel so alone in this sadness. So what do you do if you don't have a friend like that? I don't know. Call Justin. I don't know. I mean, honestly, it's friends can be the best therapist and the best medicine on the planet. And I'm really lucky that I have Justin.

And I really, I wish that everyone could have a really good friendship like that. And it's not just Justin. I have really good girlfriends too. I mean, I have some of the best friends on the planet. And I'm very lucky for that. And I've known most of my really good friends for 20 plus years. Or about 20 years, I'd say. And I'm thankful for that. And I would say, if you want that, be that, right? Like I think everything is energy and we

attract what we put out there. So start by you being that friend for someone. And I really think it's going to come back for you. So, okay. Would you rather be famous or not famous? It's, I think fame is such a weird thing and I've always felt a little disconnected from it, which I think is what's kept me sane, but I like my life. I'm not going to lie to you guys. I wouldn't trade my life for the world. There's a lot of really fun, cool, great stuff that comes with fame. There's also a massive fucking headache that comes with it too. And a lot of things that are unfortunate, but I wouldn't give it up. However, I've dealt with it for 20 years. This is my life. It's what I'm used to. If it went away tomorrow, I would be totally fine.

I'm not like, I don't find my validation in that. And I don't, I never have. To me, it's always seemed like a very fake world because it is. What the fuck is fame? That's not real. That's not like, it's not tangible. It's like when I really think about it, it like kind of fucks with me a little bit. It's kind of hard to explain, but I did have a phase in my really early 20s when I was probably 20 or 21. And I felt like it was really unfair because I didn't seek it out. Listen, I don't feel like this anymore. I'm just telling you how I felt at the time. To me, Laguna Beach fell into my lap. And yeah, I ran with it because I was given an opportunity. Of course, I was going to run with it. But to me, it felt... And again, this is a time in my life where I had paparazzi outside of my house every

day. I was always on the cover of the tabloids for shit I didn't do or whatever. Or maybe I did do it. And I felt really alone. And I felt really claustrophobic living in LA because of the paparazzi. And I also felt like I was a kid just doing dumb shit. And everyone was judging me. And I just, I like, it was hard for me for a period of time because I was like, you know, it'd be different if like, I wanted this, I wanted the fame. I wanted, you know, I was like searching it out, but like, this all just like happened to me. And my excuse at the time was like, yeah, I was, you know, MTV came to our high school. I'm a competitive person. It was like, fuck yeah, I'm going to get this show, you know, but it was very different than me, like wanting to be an actor and like chasing those dreams and like wanting to be

famous. So I kind of struggled with that for a little bit, but I want to change it for the world. I've learned so much about myself through it all. And, you know, I've gotten to do some incredible stuff. I mean, my career has been very cool. It's been all over the map. I've done a lot of stuff. I've met really great people. I've been to amazing places. I've, I've tackled a lot of fears. I had this crazy fear of public speaking and I've had to face that head on in a lot of situations. And I feel really, and you know, when it's all said and done, I have felt really proud of myself and it's been challenging. It's taught me a lot. It really has. And so no, I wouldn't trade it for the world. And I think I have a good handle on

like the fame aspect of it now. I think getting out of LA has been great, especially for my kids, but it's, you're not as much in a fishbowl there. I have a lot of control to a degree just through social media and the podcast. You know, I can kind of pick and choose what I want out there. I will say this. I'm consistently surprised at the level of attention that I get. And I'm not saying that in a cocky way. I'm simply saying that of like, let's use Montana as an example of like hard launching Montana, right? Posting them on Instagram. Did I know that that would be a big deal? Yeah, I knew it would be a big deal. I had no idea to the degree that it was. Posted a picture with Stephen Coletti and I a few years ago. Also knew it would be a big deal. Didn't know to what degree. So there's been these like

moments in my life, even in just the last couple of years where I'm like, whoa, it's wild that like 20 years later, right? The fame aspect can at times be bigger than I give myself credit for or just bigger than I ever anticipate. And while it can be stressful and having a lot of people judging me, it's also cool because 20 years later, you know, when I was on Laguna Beach and people would tell me, enjoy your 15 minutes because it's going to be up to now 20 years later, still, I don't have people care that much, I guess is like, wow, I it's impactful. It's meaningful to me in the sense that like, I guess, I don't know. I guess that's why I've been able to have a career 20 years

later. And I'm, I'm thankful in it in a way, because I know how tough it can be to have a career in entertainment. And I feel very lucky that I'm still able to. I guess is the whole point, this whole fucking workaround that I'm doing. I'm just thinking out loud. But, you know, and that's a testament to you guys who listen to the podcast. I mean, you know, I'm talking into a fucking camera right now in my, in my dining room because you guys care. And that's, that's very cool. And I think, you know, being on reality TV at such a young age, it's, I get it now because I think y'all feel so connected to me because we've kind of grown

up together. And so that's, that's been nice. That's nice. It's hard at times. And now I'm like, okay, I can really see the positive in it all. So, okay. Curious if you've ever struggled with jealousy and how you've managed that. Oh yeah. I mean, yes, of course I have. And jealousy can be so many different things, like there can be jealousy in a relationship. There can be jealousy of just like another girl, like for how she looks or her, you know, whatever it may be, what she has. Jealousy that I have maybe dealt with in my life has been, I've been jealous of other girls before for their body or the way, you know, the way they look. I a hundred percent have. I have been jealous in relationships before. I think I've had a good handle on jealousy in relationships though,

because here's what I'll say. You don't want to be with a man who is going to consistently make you feel jealous. I think it's really important to be with a man who is going to make you feel confident and secure in the relationship. I think that's problem number one. Like why, if you're really feeling jealous in a relationship, why? Or is it really just about you and you've got some insecurity that you need to deal with? But I, you know, I think like when it comes to a relationship, my stance is sort of, you have to trust your partner because what is the point of getting so worked up when a something probably won't happen or B, if it does, then bye, you don't want that guy. Like an example would be even in, you know, my marriage. Like if

I don't know, I just remember like all of my ex-boyfriends, if they would go out and I wasn't there, it would be like, okay, like have fun. Cool. I'm going to bed because I'm not going to stay up worried all night. If another girl can take your man, then you can have them. Bye. It's that simple. And one good thing about social media is I feel like now girls, there are a lot of shady girls out there, but a lot of girls are coming together and like having each other's backs and they will tell, they will like find the wife or the girlfriend or whatever and rat out a guy if he's not being a good guy. So that I think is good. I just feel like we all, us women, we have this gut feeling like we know if something happened, we just know. And so I think, well, no, but there's no point in getting worked

up over it. Cause I also think jealousy is such an ugly, ugly emotion. It's such a turnoff for men. And so, yeah, I would look at like, how can you feel the most confident? And if, if a guy is making you feel really jealous, like you should look at that. Something like that's a bigger thing. And if you bring it up to a guy and they kind of disregard your feelings, that's also a red flag. And you need to assess that relationship. That's all I'm saying. But you know, it's weird. Like social media brings out the worst in people. And I think, you know, these guys, if they're following a bunch of random girls, it gets, it gets tricky. It definitely gets tricky. You want a guy who is going to unfollow

the girls when you get into a relationship. I think that's important because it's a respect thing. And I think a lot of guys are like, I don't even think twice about it. Like, cause guys are bombarded with girls in bikinis and shit all day long where, yeah, I think there's probably a lot of truth to that. Like they're kind of desensitized to it and it's just like scrolling, whatever, but it's a respect thing. It's a respect thing for your girlfriend or your wife of like, maybe that's my ego. It's not like it is a respect thing. And I also think maybe my ego is a little bit involved where it's like, maybe that's my ego. It's not like it is a respect thing. And I also think maybe my ego is a little bit involved where it's like, I don't want my boyfriend to follow a bunch of random girls to be like, Oh, Kristen Cavallari's boyfriend follows me. Like he watches my stories

and stuff like, no, fuck you. Fuck you. I don't like that at all, at all. I don't just think that because people know who I am. Like any girl, I don't want any girl to be able to be like, oh yeah, her boyfriend looks at all my shit. I don't like that. It's a respect thing. So we should all go for the guys who are fucking man enough to unfollow these girls and make you feel secure in a relationship. I'm sorry. That's how it should be. Otherwise, fuck these guys, man. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Fuck them. With how busy you are, how do you prioritize you time and what do you do to fill your cup? It can be a challenge sometime. And I get, I have to have alone time to recharge my batteries. And if I don't have it for a while, I, I just get like,

I just get like a little like, like it's, I don't know how to explain it. Like I just get stressed out. So it is when I have a day, that's what I mean. It doesn't happen very often. If I have a day where I can sleep in, drink my coffee slowly, get everything done that I need to get done. So there's no laundry hanging over my head. There, I don't need to go to the grocery store. There's, you know, like the random house shit, right? When everything's done, that to me is like, oh, I can breathe. Because like the endless to-do list is what stresses me out. And it's when it's the endless to-do list gets backed up. But then I'm just like, oh, like I start to get like, oh, I can't do it all.

Like I just like start to fall apart. So it's being able to, for what I've learned, I just started doing this in the last couple months, booking in a day here and there where I have a day. I literally in my schedule have on a random day, keep empty. Maybe I'm working out in the morning. Maybe I'm taking my kids to school that morning or whatever it is, but keep empty so that I have some hours to catch up on life. So I don't feel like I'm going to lose my fucking mind or so that I can do a face mask, you know, and not be like trying to do five other things at the same time, like having a minute. I love, I love more than anything being able to have coffee when I'm not fucking

rushing out the door to take the kids to school when I'm not like rushing to go whatever. I, I just want to drink my coffee slowly. So that's how much to ask for, but it doesn't happen very often now that it's the summertime, I'm having some slower coffee mornings, you know, but which is great. That's why summer, I love you summer so much for the lazy mornings. I love them. But you know, normally that doesn't happen. And so if you're so busy that you have to schedule yourself some time like me, do it. It's learning what you need to feel balanced. And so that's how I fill my cup is having some alone time. That's how I do it. That's literally, and I don't even know what I do in my alone time. It's not,

it's alone time when I don't have 10 things I need to get to, when I can just kind of like cruise around my house and like, see what I want to do. Blast music and just kind of like, hmm, I'll clean out my closet. Like, oh, that gets me going. All right, fashionistas, let's talk about clothing brand Lulus. Lulus is feminine, playful, approachable, and reliable. Lulus has amazing value and quality for the price. There's no occasion Lulus can't handle. There's an outfit for all of life's moments. Lulus has the dresses and outfits that you'll remember with friends you'll never forget. Right now, there's so much happening. The summer months are so busy with different activities. If you're anything like me and my friend group, I have baby showers. I have bridal

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summer is just having really lightweight, easy dresses to just throw on. You don't have to think about it. And that is something that Lulu's really does well. So guys, visit lulus.com and use code honest at checkout for 20% off your first purchase. That's l-u-l-u-s.com and use code honest for 20% off your first order. New customers only, terms apply. Here's a brand you guys know and love, and that is Facebook. On Facebook, I don't just scroll mindlessly. I've been able to further my interest by going above and beyond the scroll. So for example, if you're interested in cooking like I am, you can find Facebook groups that have similar interests just like that. And whether it's cooking or fashion, travel, whatever it is, there are groups for everybody. This idea is called social discovery. The Facebook group that I'm in,

we recently just all made a chicken piccata recipe and we all share that. I love sharing recipes because I honestly just like seeing how everyone's turns out because I am no food stylist. So I love getting inspiration from other people. I've also discovered new chefs that I just find really inspiring. I've learned a lot from them. And I've also just gotten some really great recipes. Another thing I love so much about this is that, you know, there are real people behind this content, which makes it seem like there's a real sense of community, which I love. I would encourage you guys to find some groups, create some reels, share them, see what happens. You could do fun fashion videos. You could do cooking videos, join me and my groups. Or if you're traveling this summer, you could make

reels about your whole trip. And I feel like those would do extremely well. So where will it take you? All right, you guys. So tap into the people on Facebook to fuel the things that you're interested in. If you want to discover more, visit Facebook. Do you use your own face products? Be honest. Yes. And I know me telling you that doesn't mean jack shit. What I can tell you is I've never, ever, ever, ever been able to get behind something that I didn't fully believe in. And because it's my own company, I am selfishly creating products that I want. I use all of these products. What I am doing is I'm also supplementing with new products that we have coming out. So I'm using products currently that are coming that are not out yet. And we are developing a lot more too. But yes, I use every

single product. I'm the one developing these products. I'm the one testing them. I'm the one making notes on them. I shouldn't say develop them. I'm working with a lab to develop them, but it's me. I am every skincare product that we put out there is because I want to do it. I don't have, I've got a team of people helping me work on it, but I'm the one testing all of them. They are all my ideas. And again, I am creating products that I want. That's everything that we do at Uncommon James and Uncommon Beauty. I haven't bought a piece of jewelry since I launched Uncommon James. I mean, like this is, I design what I want, skincare. I'm creating products that I want. Otherwise, why am I doing it? Right? Like I believe in everything

that we're putting out there so much. I'm not going to waste my fucking time if I didn't. I don't know what else to say. You know, it's like, I'm sure some people are like, oh bullshit. No, I mean, I, that's all I can say. I don't know what else to say on the matter other than if you know me, you know how authentic I am. And even like paid social posts and stuff, you guys, I've gotten offers to a lot of fucking money, six figures to talk about products. And I'm like, I could never because I wouldn't take it or like, I don't believe in it. So if I'm going to get behind something, it's because I wholeheartedly believe in it and take it for what it is. I mean, if you believe me or not, but that's, that's who I am to the core. Any advice for the ladies struggling to find a decent guy. It is such an emotional roller coaster, isn't it? When you can't find

someone. I didn't like anyone for, well, I liked for three years, really. I couldn't find a guy for three years. Well, it's interesting. I could find a decent guy. I found a lot of decent guys. I just wasn't attracted to any of them. And that was, it was, it was hard. Cause I was like, am I ever going to find someone that I like? It is hard. What I will tell you is get so comfortable being on your own that you're just like, whatever, he'll come. And I think, you know, with manifesting and everything, if you believe in that stuff is just knowing that he's coming, he's coming. I know he's coming. So you're not hung up on when he's coming. So you're just going about your day. And it was weird right before I met Montana, like a couple months leading up to it. Cause I actually like two months before I met him,

I was like, I'm done dating. I'm so fucking done. I went on so many bad dates. I never liked anybody. And I was like, this is so frustrating. So I was like, I'm done. I'm taking a break. But when I, when I knew in my break, I was like, he's my guy's coming. My guy is literally right around the corner. I felt it. I just felt it. And I wasn't worried. Like I'm taking a break. So how am I going to meet someone? It was like, he's when he is supposed to come into my life, he will. And I wasn't worried like I'm taking a break. So how am I going to meet someone? It was like he's when he is supposed to come into my life, he will. And I still believe that you cannot miss or mess up what is meant for you. I wholeheartedly believe that. I will tell you a couple little manifesting hacks, I guess, that I did do right before Montana came into my life. Two things. I cleaned out a drawer in my

closet. I had an empty drawer because they say you have to create space for something new to come in. So I cleaned out a drawer and you know, you can pin people on your phone. I had nine people pinned and I removed one person. So I had an empty space. So every single day I would look at my phone and there was an empty space. So it was like a little reminder of like, I need, I need to put someone here. But I was like, he's coming. He's, I knew I was saving that space for a man. He's coming. He's going to be here before we know it. But it's, it just, it's, life is funny because it's like when you're in the midst of something like that, it seems like it's never ending and it's, it can be so lonely at times and it can be sad. And, and then you meet someone and

you look back and you're like, Oh my, a, what was I worried about? B that flew by. Cause I had those moments. I did. I had a lot of fun in the last four years. I met a lot of, you know, interesting people. I went on a lot of dates. I was very comfortable being on my own. In fact, I loved it. But I had moments of being like, when am I going to fucking meet someone? Especially when like everyone else in my life is in a relationship. And I, for the first time in my life was the only single person. And I was like, oh, this kind of sucks. So I get it. It's hard, but it's just journal in that time. I really believe in journaling and just like getting everything out and go through phases. Like if you're in a phase where you don't

want to date, don't fucking date. You can, who says you have to date all the time? I would, mine was ebbs and flows. I would go on a thousand dates and then I wouldn't date at all for months. And then I'd be so excited again and re-energized and I'd go on a million dates. And then I'd be like, I fucking hate this. So it's just, you do what feels right for you, but it'll, it'll happen. It's just trusting in the process I think is the lesson, right? Okay. Do you find yourself a little insecure dating a younger, good looking person? I really don't. I think with where I'm at in my life, just of how I feel in my own skin, really, really being confident. I don't. I mean, I notice how good looking he is every fucking day.

And I will do like a little skincare routine for him at night. So I'm like rubbing his face, like looking at his face, being like, like Jesus Christ you have the most perfect flawless face on the planet like not a fucking wrinkle or line you know and so then I kind of see a difference but no no and you know he's so great about telling me how beautiful he thinks I am and I think quite honestly like every single day he tells me that even when I look like shit, I know I've got no makeup on. Like when I know I don't look good, he still tells me that I'm pretty. And so that goes a long way, I think, too. It's like finding a guy who just makes you feel really good, I think, is is the most important thing. So, no, I I don't. But my God, he really is really good looking.

So yeah. But you know, guys, let's keep it real for a second. All of my exes have been really good looking. Like if you go like, you know, high school through, you know, everyone was pretty damn good looking. And I think I actually look better now than I did when I was younger. So I kind of like keep that in the back of my head of like, well, you know, if you could do it back then, you look better now, you know, just like keeping it in perspective. Can you talk about ways that you and Montana connect, like the deeper stuff, love languages, best date, how you unwind, et cetera. Okay. So really early on, we had a conversation about love languages and I think they're

so important to understand in a relationship. I am words of affirmation. So someone writing me a letter, for example, and just telling me how much they appreciate me or what I mean to them, I mean, goes so far with me. So far with me. And Montana is acts of service. So, like me making him dinner really resonates for him or like, you know, the little things that I do for him. And I think, I think learning how to speak the other person's language is where the magic is because if I'm words of affirmation, so typically we show our love through how we feel it. So I'm words of affirmation. If I'm sitting here telling Montana how much I love him and how fucking beautiful he is, it's probably not going to land the same way that it would for me. So it's learning how to speak his language by making him dinner, doing his little skincare routines for him at night, you know, all of that kind of stuff, you know, asking him if he wants water before we go to bed. Like, you know, he's literally told me like the little things

like that mean a lot to him. And so he is so good about knowing what I need in a relationship. And again, you know, for being 24 and him being able to emotionally step up and give me more than I have ever felt in another relationship is mind-blowing. I'll tell you one thing that he really did that was so sweet. We went 10 days without seeing each other in the spring. And before he left, he gave me a stack of 10 cards to open one a day. And that was so meaningful to me because in previous relationships, I would be like, all I want is a letter. Like for my birthday, just write me a letter. I don't want anything else. I don't want you to buy me anything. I want to hear it. I want you to let me in to your world, like open up to me and talk to me. And it's really hard for a lot of people. And so the fact that Montana just did

this was like, oh my God, that's what resonates with me. I am consistently blown away at his emotional maturity. And that's been really cool for me. I don't, I've never really had that. So yeah, we just do. We just connect. That's what it is. Like we're not afraid to have the tough conversations and neither one of us is afraid to be vulnerable, which is also new for me. I've always been so scared to be vulnerable. And I've from the get go with him, it was like, this one has to be different. Like if I want this to work, it has to be different. And I knew, and you know, because I had done the work the last few years, I was like, when I enter into a new relationship, I'm excited to see how I am. And that was a big thing for me of like, I have to let that go, like fucking be vulnerable. And I have been,

and to have for that to be so scary for me and to have it be reciprocated and him to be so thoughtful with it and take such good care of my vulnerability has been really huge for me. It's quite honestly been a turning point in relationships for me. No matter what happens with us, I think for me, being able to trust and being vulnerable is huge for me. So yeah, it's really good. It's really special and it's really good. So I think we end on that one. But I think what we'll do is I'll do a part two because I've got a million more questions. So next week, we'll do the rest of the questions. But these are really good questions, you guys. So thank you for submitting them. And I'll see you guys next week.