Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - Honestly Cavallari Episode 3: Chicago Pt. 2

Episode Date: June 17, 2025

Join me as we dig into the behind the scenes of Harry and Johnny's show. I explain the entire back story of my relationship with Johnny, including leading up to the live show, immediately after and where we stand today. We get into my self reflections, the difference between the TV show version and the actual podcast version. Plus, we discuss why I have so much love for Harry. A word from my sponsors:Quince - Go to Quince.com/honest for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Wayfair - Shop the huge selection of outdoor furniture online. This summer, get outside with Wayfair. Head to Wayfair.com right now. Wayfair. Every style. Every home.Hiya Health - Go to hiyahealth.com/HONEST to receive 50% off their best selling children's vitamin. Jolie - Jolie will give you your best skin & hair guaranteed. Head to Jolieskinco.com/HONEST to try it out for yourself with FREE shipping. And if you don't like it - you can return your Jolie for a full refund within 60 days, no questions asked. Cymbiotika - Go to cymbiotika.com/HONEST for 20% off your order + free shipping today OpenPhone - OpenPhone is offering listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/honest. And if you have existing numbers with another service, OpenPhone will port them over at no extra charge. For more Let's Be Honest, follow along at:@kristincavallari on Instagram@kristincavallari and @dearmedia on TikTokLet's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari on YouTubeProduced by Dear Media.This episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. This is Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality TV, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing. Okay, guys, how are we doing? Welcome in. We have another Honestly Cavallari recap. Because I got all the power, yep. OK, guys, how we doing? Welcome in. We have another Honestly Cavallari recap.

This is for episode three. This is the second show in Chicago, Harry Jousey's live show, and of course, this is the Johnny drama. So this episode starts with me coming off stage from the first show in Chicago, which was of course with the Laguna crew. And they teased it last week, but I come off and I go, holy fuck,

that was awful or whatever I said, something to that effect. And then I'm talking about how bad the show was. And here's what I learned about myself doing the podcast tour and having it documented is I'm very, very hard on myself. I think I came off of every show and thought, that was awful, that was horrible. I think the only show where I was pretty jacked up

and felt really good about it was Austin and Craig. And then there was a lot of drama for other reasons, so, which you'll see, but I never felt like, I knocked it out of the park. I never felt like it was a good show. And so that is not necessarily a knock on the Laguna cast because I actually went and listened, obviously I've listened to all of the podcast episodes now

and the Laguna episode is one of my favorites. And I laughed my ass off listening to it. And I'm excited for you guys to listen to the podcast episode because we talked about this last week, but they take what was, let's say it was an hour live show. And for the TV show, they have to boil it down to like a minute, if that.

So there's no way to just capture all of it. And the girls, especially Alex Morrell, gave so many great little nuggets and there were so many great stories and it was hilarious. And I actually thought Talon was hilarious too. So, and again, I just wanna remind you guys. So when I came off stage, I knew I was really pushed for time. And so while I was out there,

I was stressed out and on edge because I knew I had to get to this other show and I am always prompt I am always on time and I will say Every show on the live tour started late not because of me and now I have a new fan Respect for musicians when I'm at a concert and I'm like why the hell can they never start on time? It's not up to them They're probably ready backstage. My tour manager made me wait until the audience was full. So that was not on me. I was always ready to go at seven o'clock sharp or seven 30 or whatever it was. So I hate being late.

I'm stressed out because I know Laguna has gone over a lot. And obviously being on stage with Laguna, it did feel chaotic because, you know, the night before my first show with Kim, it was very, but just boom, boom, boom. You know, I'm asking all my questions, she's answering, it's just like onto the next. And Laguna felt like the train had been derailed, I'm trying to chase and catch up. I don't know now which way we're going,

which is very entertaining, but that's just where I was at. And again, this is my first live podcast tour. I've never done this before. So I'm very hard on myself. Anyways, I realized I'm kind of more sensitive than I thought. So. Well, yes, that is my very real reaction coming off stage. They also my reactions to Talon during the show were very much amped up.

I mean, and you'll hear it in the podcast episode. You know, him saying the Montana boys, I wasn't like, oh my God. Like, I think I probably laughed. It was not that reaction. So keep in mind it is still a TV show. Anyways, so then I change, I go to my meet and greet. I'm so happy and excited that I have Harry coming on this next episode because Harry is someone

who I just absolutely adore. I mean, you can see how much I truly do connect with him and how much I care about him and vice versa. And they show my mom, which shout out my mom. She is so freaking cute. And my mom did not wanna film. My mom hates this stuff, but she did it for me. And I really appreciate it.

Cause while it's very quick, last episode and this episode, she is so cute and her little moment, it was last week, but when fans were taking pictures with my mom because I found out she was my mom, I just think is the cutest moment with her. My mom is so cute. So anyways, shout out Jude. And then we get in, you know,

we're starting to set the groundwork that Johnny is coming out. Johnny is of course my eighth grade boyfriend, my very first boyfriend in Barrington, Illinois, where I lived with my mom throughout middle school. And I my very first boyfriend in Barrington, Illinois, where I lived with my mom throughout middle school and I actually started high school in Barrington. It wasn't until October of my freshman year of high school that I moved to Laguna.

So anyways, I dated Johnny all throughout eighth grade and then I don't know exactly when we broke up. I mean, I know that we went to the eighth grade dance together, so we were very much together the end of eighth grade. I'm assuming we broke up. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe the very beginning of freshman year.

I'm really not, I'm not sure on the timeline of that. But you know, the thing with Johnny is, so Johnny had reached out to me because he saw that I was coming to Chicago for my podcast tour. And he told me that he wanted to come. So I got him tickets, you know, him and a few friends, and he was already coming, so I decided it would be really fun to be able to pull you up on stage. I asked him if he was cool with that.

We decided yes. So the few weeks leading up to the tour, Johnny and I really played a good game of catch-up. We were on multiple phone calls. There was one time we were on the phone for I think about an hour, and we really felt like we really were connecting. We had formed this friendship again after so many years.

And granted, we kept in touch after I moved. I mean, I would go back to Barrington to visit my mom and we would see each other. But I think, you know, during my marriage, I definitely didn't talk to him and then afterwards. So it had been at least 15 years, let's say, since I have spoken to Johnny. But it was really nice catching up with him. It was like no time had passed. It was sweet. You know,

we laughed about the old times. We caught up on being parents. He's, you know, a dad. Obviously, I've got kids. He's going through a divorce right now. I've been through a divorce. Like, we had a lot in common. We had a lot to catch up on. He was still living in Chicago and there was just a lot there and it felt really nice to be able to connect with him again. And he was nervous about doing this, which I said it on the show. I'll say it again. I'll say it 500 freaking times. I really understand that.

I have a lot of empathy for Johnny, for the cast of Laguna, for the people who do not do this stuff, for being able to get up on stage and do this in front of a thousand people and cameras. Because I was nervous and I do this stuff. I don't know if someone had asked me to come up on stage and I didn't do this stuff.

I would shit my pants. I really can understand why these people are so nervous. I get that. With that being said, because Johnny was so nervous and I really was trying to set him up for success. So he asked me what I was gonna talk to him about and I quite literally ran through the outline. At this point, I had all of my questions,

all of my shows were locked in. I told him every single question. I even told him I was gonna give him a hard time about Laney. I'm gonna give you shit for it. I'm gonna say you're the reason that I'm, I was the heartbreaker, blah, blah, blah. Johnny knew every little thing that was gonna come out

of my mouth for weeks. So he had, he was able to sit on that for weeks, okay? Okay, so, oh, I thought this was so interesting. In the meet and greet that I'm doing, someone who was at the Laguna show says to me, oh, like she was so bummed that Talon was married because what a great couple we would be. And it was kind of like, what?

I was so thrown off and so confused by that. You wanna know what's even funnier about this? So I'm in LA right now, I'm doing press. And yesterday, I did a ton of interviews with, you know, Access Hollywood and Extra and E News and all the things. And someone from E actually, in one of the millions of interviews I did yesterday, was asking me about different guys that I've dated. And then she brought up talent. She was like, what about talent? And I was like, he's married with kids. Like, I'm so confused as to what's happening in the Talon department, especially after what happened on the show.

I don't understand what's happening. So Talon and I, it's not even on the table. I'm so confused. Anyways, okay, so the second show, here we go. And by the way, the audience in Chicago, both shows was phenomenal. Chicago always, anytime I've done anything in Chicago, a book signing, a store opening,

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Anyways, so I say that I see a little bit of Harry and me, or me and Harry, whichever way you want to say it. And I think this because he kind of, he doesn't necessarily, I think I say he has a bad reputation, he doesn't have a bad reputation. I just think he's kind of known as like being the playboy. And I just, I don't think people realize what a good guy he is and what a big heart he has. And I feel similarly in that sense. I don't feel like people get to see the real him.

So I, in a lot of ways, do feel like I've been able to kind of like take him under my wing and I just, I feel like this like protective mode. I like go into protective mode with him. So anyways, Harry is a doll. He's so funny. He's just, I can't say enough good stuff about Harry. And people in my life, like people that I know, He's so funny. He's just, I can't say enough good stuff about Harry.

And people in my life, like people that I know, have been texting me asking if I did hook up with Harry because everyone feels like I either did or if I didn't, I should. I've had so many people in my life be like, you should date Harry. Harry does not check my boxes. In all the interviews I've been doing, everyone's like, what are you looking for? And I've been saying, I want someone older. I want someone with kids. These are non-negotiables for me anymore.

I would like someone who is not in the public eye. Harry, unfortunately, does not check those boxes. Well, yes, I love Harry. And while, yes, I'm a massive fucking flirt, this is not news to anybody. This is actually not going anywhere. I just want to throw that out there. So in the show, Harry and I are talking about

how he is trying to become husband material. And I love Harry because he talks about how he's an avoidant and how he essentially self-sabotages when he likes a woman, because if he starts liking a girl, he's realized he will then go and fuck it up by texting other girls so that he, in the past, would not get hurt, but then he says on the show, he actually understands that it's nice to get hurt

because that's where the growth is, and this is the kind of man that we all love because we need a guy who has self-awareness and who is not afraid to get hurt because he is willing and able and wanting to grow. And I love that about Harry. This is why I love Harry. We talk about the dick pic debacle.

You will have to listen to the whole podcast episode if you wanna get the full story on that. We don't have the time here to talk about it. And I am talking, so he throws it back on me about who I've been getting dicked down by, I believe were his words. At the time I hadn't been, I still haven't been. So that holds true.

I say that I've sworn off men, which was true leading up to my tour. I decided no distractions. I'm not gonna date, which was like what? Two and a half months, but still I meant it and I did it. And then I think it was the week before tour or maybe two weeks before tour, I got back on Raya unintentionally.

I talked about it on another podcast. I'm not gonna talk about how I got back on Raya, but I actually didn't even like plan on getting on Raya. I just wanted to see if my account was still active. So I ended up back on Raya. And then, which I guess was good timing for the show cause I was talking to a couple of people and then Raya is fun for two weeks.

So actually the very end of tour, I just completely stopped talking to a couple people. And then, Riot is fun for two weeks. So actually, the very end of tour, I just completely stopped talking to one of the guys I was talking to. I ghosted him, which I'm not proud of. I'm not, I don't like doing that. I've only actually ghosted maybe two or three people in the last five and a half years, because no one ghosted back in the day, by the way.

Like in my late teens, early twenties, that wasn't a thing, it's become a thing. And I always feel bad when I do it, but I just was like, this guy is not my future husband. I'm just gonna slowly let myself out. And I am still on Raya, but I don't swipe through anymore. The only time I ever will go on is if I get a direct message and I see who it is

and I have not responded to one. So that'll just, that just can let you know with where I'm at. I have not responded to one. So that'll just that just can let you know with where I'm at. I've maintained no real dating like I haven't been out to dinner on a date. I've of course been around men in the last few months but I would say I haven't dated. So that's where we're at. So okay now we get into the Johnny of it all. I have seen this third episode probably four or five times. And I just watched it right before I came here to film this.

And every time I've watched it, it's hard for me to watch the Johnny portion. It just is. And so here's my whole take on Johnny. So like I said, I really thought I was setting him up for success. I felt as though I was giving him a slam dunk to come out on stage and take the title of being the most amazing, caring, sweet boyfriend. And you know, because that was my experience with him. That was true. That was my takeaway and how I have looked at him all of these years later.

And is there a world in which he probably corrupted me as well? Absolutely. But both can be true. We were very much in love. It was very sweet for, especially for being 14 years old. That was all very real. And again, that just sort of also plays into

why I was so let down. And so right out of the gate, you know, I asked Johnny if he would say that we were in love. Again, he knows I'm asking him this question. He knows it's the first question. He's known for weeks. And instead of coming up with an answer or even just being like, yes or no, he decides to throw it back on me and ask me what I say. So immediately I'm kind of like, okay, a little thrown off. And I say, well, you know, I think for being as much in love as you can

be at age 14, I would say very much so. And then it's like he goes immediately into, well, how he used to sneak into my room and immediately starts to just cut it all down to being solely about sex. And he even says, I would greet him in outfits like the one I'm wearing. And I was wearing a like little black shorts, a black bra and this see-through shirt over it. And it's just like, you know, and I'm so thrown off. I'm really let down and I'm shocked quite honestly. And so, and I'm still, you can see, I'm like, okay, yes,

that is true that, yeah, Johnny, we had sex. I've never said that we didn't. Like you took my virginity. We took each other's virginity actually. But also I would wake up to poems on my window and I love you and the sweetest, most romantic, some of the sweeter and more romantic things that guys have done for me in my whole life.

And he kept just knocking it down to being about sex. I think because obviously, because I know myself so well, on stage I can tell I'm visibly upset, but what I do is then I try to overcompensate and act like I really don't care. But I think you can still kind of tell. And I keep being like, yes, but this is also true. I don't know.

I don't really understand the logic of, well, I do actually. I understand why he did that and we can get to that. So I sort of think what happens is like even with the question of, do you think that we were in love? I think what happens is these guys, and we're gonna use Johnny in particular,

and I think there's a touch of talent in here too, but it's almost like Johnny's insecure about what I'm gonna say and he feels like I might say, or like if he says yeah I think we were in love that I'm gonna be like are you serious you really thought we were in love and like make fun of him for it so instead of just being like yes it's almost like these guys feel like they have to beat me to it which is also crazy to me because and granted it's been so many years but Johnny and I had been

talking for weeks leading up to it I feel like you know me he even said to me at one point it's so nice to see that you haven't changed and lost yourself in this whole world and blah, blah, blah. So I would think that you kind of know me, that I'm actually not that big of an asshole. And I think there is this misconception with, I think a lot of people do think I'm an asshole like that. Like he would get on stage and I'd be like, huh, you're an idiot. I was never in love with you. I would never, ever do that. Ever fucking do that. Kind of as with the podcast too, I feel like people sometimes come on my podcast feeling like I'm gonna grill them

and I'm gonna go in hard. I've never done that. If you guys really do listen to the podcast, you know that I've never done that. The only person I kind of went after was Craig and you guys will see it because I had a reason to, but I actually could have been way harder than I was so I just think it's interesting when guys think I'm gonna

be like that I'm like I'm actually not like that at all I'm not trying to get have a gotcha moment with Johnny like I'm just trying to be like this was my really sweet boyfriend I've talked about him a couple times on the podcast like it's actually not that deep I'm just trying to let the audience into this little portion of my life that was pre being on TV. So I also told Johnny, of course, that like I said, I was gonna bring up Lainey. And so what happened in my head on stages, he immediately is cutting everything down

to just be about sex. So now I'm actually, I'm hurt, I'm hurt. And when I told him on the phone that I was gonna like joke around and give him a hard time about Lainey and how I was the heartbreaker, well now I'm fucking pissed. So I went in harder than I had anticipated. And I was like, you're the reason I was the heartbreaker because I'm now I'm fucking mad at Johnny. And he says that I sampled Barrington. Barrington again is where I lived. Guys, here's what I can tell you. And I think you know by now,

I am not one to hide anything. Like I don't shy away from being pretty fucking real about my past and what I've done and all the shit I'm not even proud of. When I moved to Laguna Beach, I had only hooked up with Johnny. And that's why, and I'm on stage and I'm going, and he's like, well, you hooked up with my best friend I'm like who say a name because this isn't

fucking true and you know this is a few months ago I've sat on this for months now okay and I I know I did not hook up with anybody before I moved to Laguna Beach because I remember the first guy that I hooked up with in Laguna a guy named Chris and it was a big deal for me because Johnny was the only person that I hooked up with. Like, girls don't forget those things. So then, you know, so yeah, so then he says, I hooked up with his best friend. I'm like, who? Tommy?

Okay. I don't know a fucking Tommy. Johnny and I had the same group of friends for years. I could sit here and list all of our friends, okay? First names and last names. And Tommy's your best friend and you and I dated for a year, but I have no recollection of who a Tommy is. I'm sorry. No. Here's what I can think of, okay? Years later, years later, when I went back to visit my mom, we all, a group of us went on a boat one day and I'm pretty sure there was a guy named Tommy there then.

Not 100% sure on that, but this is the only thing I can maybe gather. And we got hammered, as we used to do all the time in high school. And I kissed Tommy back at the house afterwards. And that was that. But this is when I, I mean, this is years later. This is, I was well into high school. So the timing on that is not accurate. Johnny, just throwing that out there. You know, the other thing is too, we're talking about when we were kids at 14 years old. I mean, that's Camden, my oldest will be 14 in just over

a year. And, you know, you're, you're so young. I clearly lost my virginity at a very young age. And that was, you know, the other thing is too, he knows what I was going through in my life at that time. And to try to like sexualize it and essentially call me a whore is wild to me. And I mean, he's a dad, you know? and I don't know, I just felt like it was even if it was true, because the thing is, it's not true, but even if it was true, it's so wildly inappropriate. Just talking about, you know, the age that we were at. We're not talking about when I was 25 and an adult and, you know, kind of had my shit together. That's debatable. But I was 25 and an adult and kind of had my shit together. That's debatable. But I was a 14-year-old little girl.

And my other thing is it just felt clearly so premeditated. He had an agenda to come out on stage and just tear me down because he had weeks to sit on this, come up with his answers. And he told me later, I don't know if it was, I think it was that night actually. So after the two shows, we actually went out to a bar. We went out to this bar and everybody,

I mean, Harry was there, a lot of my friends that you didn't actually see, the Laguna crew, Johnny fucking came, even though I didn't want him to. And maybe that night he told me, no, it was his friend. Oh my God, it was his friend. His friend that's night he told me, no, it was his friend. Oh my God, it was his friend. His friend that's a girl told me that no one ever believed Johnny about me. So for 20 plus years, I don't even know,

20 whatever years, if Johnny would say like, oh, well, Kristen Cavalieri, I took her virginity. No one believed him. So to me, it felt like he had all of this anger built up after all of these years that I had nothing to do with, and he was taking it all out on me on stage. And Johnny and I did talk after the tour. I couldn't deal with that while I was on tour. But when I finally got home, I had a minute

to kind of think about everything, because he had texted me. So I finally did reach out, and I was like, hey, I was upset. I am upset, you know? And I'm not gonna put what he said on blast, because again, I respect that he was and is a private person and he didn't really want any of this, besides the fact that he agreed to come up on stage and then did what he did.

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And if you have existing numbers with another service, OpenPhone will port them over at no extra charge. OpenPhone no missed calls, no missed customers. I will say, I want to be careful about airing out Johnny's dirty laundry, but some of the stuff he did say as an excuse was, oh, well, you know, E-entertainment. Meaning like, he felt like he had to bring the drama and bring this entertainment, which is not your role.

Like, again, Johnny, you don't do this stuff. So actually, you don't need to worry about that. You don't need to worry about bringing the drama. You're the sweet ex-boyfriend. Just be yourself. And I think he was probably also intimidated by Harry, because he also said something about the conversation that Harry and I were having before he came up.

And I think he just got so much in his head that it just went awry. And so essentially he was saying, because I'm going through shit in my life, I get a pass to treat you like shit and I don't play that game. And I'm just at a point in my life where, and I've said it a million times, if you can't take some sort of accountability, I don't need you in my life. And by the way, now I'm on stage apologizing for something that I don't even know if I did,

because that's where I'm at. And by the way, both things can be true. Let's say I did hook up with Tommy before I moved to Laguna and this whole story is accurate. Both things can be true. I could have broke your heart and you could have actually also broken mine too. Both things can be true. In a have broke your heart and you could have actually also broken mine too. Both things can be true.

In a perfect world, I apologized on stage. He should have been like, thank you. And also if I did break your heart, I am sorry for that as well. I never got an apology. I never got jacked shit. All I did was get torn down. And you know, here's the thing.

I talk a lot about my experience with men on the podcast and everything. And I want you guys to know, here's the thing. I talk a lot about my experience with men on the podcast and everything and I want you guys to know I actually Don't blame Johnny. I don't blame any Guy that I've ever dated for anything. I blame myself. And so this whole this tour Specific well, no the whole fucking tour actually I was gonna say Chicago But no it carried over until later in the tour which we you guys will see But this tour was really therapeutic for me in a lot of ways which I did not expect because what it did was it made me realize the type of man that I've allowed into my life for years and

clearly it started way earlier than I thought I for all these years thought Johnny was a great guy and Steven was a great guy. And it really kind of started like after I graduated high school and whatnot, but no, clearly it started very, oh, just a lot earlier than I had remembered. And that's on me because listen, Johnny's going to be Johnny, you know, all of the, every ex boyfriend is just being themselves. I was the one who had zero fucking self love

that allowed the behavior that I allowed. And I do, Johnny is, it's an interesting one because again, I mean, there were very sweet moments, like very, very sweet moments. And after the tour, I was pissed obviously, and I was like, he just ruined everything that we ever had. And I got home and I had a minute to breathe and then I decided actually no his behavior on stage doesn't ruin what we had because I was there in eighth

grade when I was 14 I lived it I experienced it and he can't take that away actually and with whatever he's going through personally he can't ruin that for me what we had was special, I know that, and I actually still hold our relationship in a high regard. What happened most recently is really shitty and it really does break my heart, but I still look at our relationship when we were 13, 14 as amazing. So I'm not going to let him take that from me. But any kind of to go off of what I was just saying, I think it was good for me to have these moments on tour to For a few reasons one is because now I recognize this type of personality so quickly so quickly and I'll never do it again and

Two it showed me how far I've come and Three it was just God, I don't it was I don't know I think I think that the hard things that we go through just really do make us stronger. And I think it was more just, it really is cementing that I've done the work and thank God I've done the work so that now I do see this type of behavior immediately.

I mean, that's my takeaway from it. And cause you know, the funny thing too about Johnny was leading up to the show, he was such a great guy. You know, the show happened. I was leading up to the show, he was such a great guy, you know? The show happened, I was like, what the fuck? Immediately after we all went to this bar, like I said, he came up and gave me the biggest kiss on the cheek. I wish they used this.

God, I wish they used this in the show. He came up and gave me the biggest kiss on the cheek and I was like, ugh, ugh, I'm so mad. And acted like that was great. And like, how fun was that? And like, oh buddies, yay. And I was just sitting there like, cause, and you have to remember Talon and Johnny happened back to back in the same night. So I was like, my world was rocked. I was fucking exhausted emotionally and physically. And we had to go to the, we didn't, I guess, I don't want to say we had to go to the, we didn't, I guess,

I don't wanna say we had to go to this bar, but I think because I'm filming a TV show, I felt like I should. If I wasn't filming a show, I would've been like, no, I'm fucking wrecked, I'm going to bed. But I had a lot of friends there, and the cast of Laguna and Harry and, you know, Justin and Beegs and everybody.

And so I was like, okay, I guess I'll go. And I did not wanna be there. So then the next day they have Justin, Shar and I and Beaks going to get IVs. And in the car ride over, we're talking about now a new dick pic with Harry and how I sent him a lingerie photo. Oh, this is actually really funny.

I sent Harry this episode a couple days ago, just so he could see it before it aired. And in the episode, I talk about the lingerie photo that I sent him and how I've sent it to multiple people. And so Harry, after he saw the episode, was like, I knew there was a story. I knew there was a story with this lingerie photo. Like he knew it, which just wasn't for him,

which he wasn't wrong. And then I got another dig pic and now I'm showing everybody and everyone's going, oh my God, Harry. So then this conversation, of course, runs into the Johnny and Talon of it all because Harry is such a good guy. And I don't know, there's just a huge difference for me between Harry and the other two.

And so then we start talking about Johnny and Talon and I'm upset because it's throwing all of my issues with men in my face. And again, I've done the work, I've gotten to the other side, but it's just bringing it all up. And even my dad, because my dad always shit on everything in my life.

Nothing was ever good enough. But my dad would love to boast about me when it did him a favor, when it looked good for him, but when it was just about me, he could never give me any credit, which is kind of how I felt with these other guys too. So I started crying a little bit, which, you know, listen, I was like, if I'm going to do the show, I'm going to put it all

out there. I'm going to, I'm going to do it. And I'm so happy that Justin and Shar are there. So these obviously are two of my longest friendships. I've known Justin and Shar for 20 years. I met them both when I was 18. And they're just, they're my support system. And Beegs of course too, but she's not here yet when I'm crying and they're hugging me. And they're just, you know,

it's just nice having my support team with me. I can't imagine doing this tour without them along the way. Cause it was obviously way more personal and brought up a lot from my past, way more than I ever realized. I never had anticipated any of this coming up on tour. And really the gist of it that I'm realizing is that no guy has taken accountability

for anything in my life. That has always been true, which I say on camera. And again, I'm not blaming these guys. This was on me for allowing these men into my life. So that's that. So that's the whole show, jam packed, holy shit. And I don't know, it's wild. On one hand, I'm like, you know,

it was a lot to go through on tour. It was emotional as fuck, and it was just, it was a lot. But I'm also like, but it made for a great TV show because it's all very real. It's very real and it was jam packed. So that's episode three. Next week we are off to Boston and Camille Kostik is the guest next week who I love.

We FaceTimed Gronk at one point, so Gronk makes a little appearance. And then it's Craig and Austin, so buckle up, because that's gonna be a good one. Glad to see you guys. ["All The Power"] ["All The Power"] ["Yeah, I got all the power"]

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