Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - Match That Energy — Listener Questions Pt. 1

Episode Date: November 21, 2023

You guys submitted questions that cover all the things: update on the Aussie, a normal day for me, we discuss all of my boyfriends, if I regret marrying so young, the best date I've been on post-divorce, something I never thought I would say in a million years, if I feel pressure to get work done being in the public eye, creating a business, why motivation doesn't always come from a pure place, why I keep my children private, and hanging with Mr. Right Now.A word from our sponsors:Visit ritual.com/BEHONEST to start Ritual or add Synbiotic+ to your subscription today.Go to diviofficial.com/HONEST or enter HONEST at checkout for 20% off your first order.Use code HONEST at Loft.com to receive $25 off your full-price purchase. ****Offer valid 9/19 through 1/1/2024 at 2:59am ET only at LOFT.com when you enter code HONEST at checkout. Valid on in-stock full-price merchandise, excluding sneak previews, third-party merchandise, and cashmere. Total full-price purchase must exceed $25 before taxes and shipping & handling are applied. Offer not combinable with total store promotions, free shipping on qualifying orders of $99+, or other discounts unless otherwise stated. In the event of a return, the discount will be deducted from refund and may not be re-used. Not redeemable for cash. May not be applied towards payments on outstanding credit balances, purchases of gift cards or e-gift cards, or, except as stated in our Return Policy, adjustments to prior purchases, returns, or exchanges.Download the Drizly app or go to Drizly.com - Must be 21+, Not available in all locations.Go to tryarmra.com/HONEST or enter HONEST to get 15% off your first order.Produced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. This is Let's Be Honest with Kristen Cavallari, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality TV, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing. Welcome in to Let's Be Honest. I am your host, Kristen Cavallari, and today I'm answering y'all's questions. I had you guys submit questions that you wanted answers to on my Instagram. I actually asked you guys like two months ago, and then all of the craziness with LA happened, so I reopened up the questions last week. So we got some updated ones, but I also had some really good questions from before.

My producer and I kind of mixed them all together and we're going to get into it all. So here we go. Okay, the first question is, which I think is hilarious. Dying to know what happened with the Australian still texting. So I have purposely not opened up these text messages yet. So again, if you guys didn't hear my 72 hours in LA, I think it's the funniest episode. So I definitely recommend going and listening. But this Australian on the rugby team is literally still texting me, you guys. I think it's been a month and he is still going. So

I blocked him on my regular number. All communication is on WhatsApp. And when you open a message, you can see if someone has read it. So I purposely haven't been opening them. I'm going to right now for you guys. Okay. So the latest is he had been texting me a bunch, right? Can I check in and say, Hey, I mean, this is sweet, but outside of how attractive and sexy I think you are, there's much more that I like about you as a person. I need a tour around Tennessee one day. And by the way, this sent me a photo. This is over like periods of time. I'm not responding. Sent me a photo. Bootsy bellows because that's where we met. Question mark. Don't have to ignore me, miss. So then I said, Kyle, this is all just too much. I wish you well, but there's no point to us texting each other. And he goes, what's too much? I genuinely care that you're doing okay or

not. It's nice to know how you're going. That's all. I'm happy to just leave you alone and let you know if I'm ever back in the States or not, if you want it that way. No response. A couple of days ago. I understand. I'll let you be. Take care of yourself. Yesterday. Do you make men's jewelry? You guys. It's like almost to the point where I feel bad now. Like I feel bad making fun of the situation because I actually think like this is not, this isn't clearly, this is not normal behavior. This has been going on for weeks and weeks. When I tell you that I have asked him probably 12 times to stop texting me and that to leave me alone, that's not an exaggeration. And I don't know, I'm going to obviously have to block him on WhatsApp, but this is like one of those situations where if he lived in the States, I would be like a little, I'd be a little nervous.

So this is the last time I'm going to talk about it and I'm going to just block him. But I mean, bananas. Okay. Yeah. So there's your update on the Aussie. Okay. What does a normal day look like for you with the kids? So I think people would be surprised at how normal my life really is. My day-to-day is very, very normal with the kids. Okay. I'll talk about a Monday morning, let's say. So Monday morning, my alarm goes off at 6 a.m. And then I wake up all three of my kids. I usually go in order of age. And more times than not, my younger two, Jackson and Sailorlor will end up sleeping longer. And then I'll usually go back around like six 30, then like six 45, but Cam is up and Adam he's in the

shower. So once, once I've woken everybody up or letting people sleep in, I will go and make breakfast and pack lunches. Breakfast is the one meal that I will make them each, whatever they want. I would never do that for dinner. Dinner is like, this is what we're having, take it or leave it. But breakfast, I don't know why. I think getting something in their stomachs before they go to school is really important. And then I pack their lunches every single day. And the mornings are chaos. They're pure freaking chaos. Feeding the dogs. I'm trying to make coffee. I'm trying to get food in me. I'm trying to at least, you know, like, God, brush my teeth and get out the door. I'm not, I mean, sometimes I literally don't even brush my teeth. I know you guys are like, that's

disgusting. But like, this is reality. Also who gives a shit? I'm not actually seeing anybody. And then I come right home and I can brush my teeth. But so getting them out the door, we leave my house at seven 30 in the morning. And then I come home usually, and I will clean up the kitchen. I'll like, you know, organize the house or whatever. I'll usually work out then depending on what's going on that day for me, I'll maybe go in the sauna, but I can't always do it. And then my life is so all over the place right now because I have the podcast, obviously. So a lot of times I'm prepping for a podcast or I'm actually filming a podcast. Tuesdays are like my big uncommon James day. So I have all of my calls with my leadership team,

my COO Wednesday, I actually have a call with my marketing girl. So I have all of my calls with my leadership team, my COO Wednesday, I actually have a call with my marketing girl. So I do a lot of that stuff. And then, you know, it's like grocery store laundry, like all the mom things, like I'm doing all of that stuff. Like I don't have someone to go to the grocery store for me or, you know, do all of that. I actually enjoy going to the grocery store and I actually, I kind of enjoy doing laundry too. I find like household stuff like that, dishes, laundry to be really therapeutic. Is it annoying to put away three kids clothes? Absolutely. And I am starting to kind of lean on them more to do some of that stuff now that they're older. Like they should be hanging up their own damn t-shirts, you know, but then I pick them up from school. I used to sometimes have them

ride the bus, but they don't like riding the bus, which is funny to me because I used to love riding the bus as a kid. So I pick them up. I'm in the car rider line, usually about 2.30. They get out at 3.07, which is so random. They get out at 3.07. We're usually home by 3.30. And then from there, it's like, you know, unpacking the lunch boxes, you know, hanging, doing whatever for a little while before I start making dinner. And I love when my kids help me make dinner, which they, at least one of them usually will, which it's like my favorite thing to do with my kids. And then we just hang out. Like we have a very normal life. We're in between sports right now, but my boys are about to start basketball. So that'll be two nights a week. Sailor rides horses two times a week. So usually

after school I'll take her. And then nighttime it's like, you know, a week. Sailor rides horses two times a week. So usually after school, I'll take her. And then nighttime, it's like, you know, bath time with Sailor. I usually will frantiprate her hair. And then I have been letting, I switch off nights between Jackson and Sailor sleeping with me. Again, judge me all you want,

but I don't have my kids full time anymore. And I never, we never did like the co-sleeping thing when they were little, but now that they're older, I'm going to savor it and take it as long as I can because I know that there's going to be a time probably sooner than later where they don't want to sleep with me anymore. Like Camden literally will not sleep with me anymore. And he's in fifth grade. So I know that time is coming with all of them. So I'm just going to enjoy it. And honestly, with the kids, because the kids are sleeping with me, it's lights out by like nine, nine, 15. So I guess I don't want to say boring. It's just very, it's very scheduled. It's very regimented. And it's always pretty much the same. I mean, sometimes we'll go and,

you know, hang with friends and whatnot, but that's usually for the weekends. Like during the week, we're usually just kind of, that's it. It's very normal. And the other thing is too, when I have my kids, like that's it. I don't get babysitters. It's, I can honestly count on two hands in three and a half years, how many times I've gotten a babysitter when I have my kids, because again, I don't have them full-time anymore. So when I don't have them, that's when I will travel. If I have to do a photo shoot out in LA or whatever, that's when I'll do it. That's when I'll see my friends. That's when I'm social or have to work more that takes me out of Nashville. So I actually do feel

like I have this really great balance and like, that's it. I have my kids. Like I can't go and do that. Sorry. It's just, it's a, it's always been a boundary for me. Okay. How many exes do you have that were actually like real relationships, not just dates. Okay. So my first boyfriend was in eighth grade and beginning of my freshman year in Barrington, Illinois, Johnny. And, you know, for being 13, 14, did I love him? Yes. I could sit here and say, for the capacity that you have at that age to love someone, I did. And that's who I lost my virginity to. I mean, he was like instrumental in the way that I saw men. The relationship was really cute. He lived really close to me. So I would wake up sometimes my room was on the, on the ground floor and I had

these like big windows in my room. I would wake up to poems and like love letters and stuff on my window. It was very sweet. He was my age. Like it was all very, very sweet. And then I moved to California. I moved to Laguna. I think it was October of my freshman year of high school. So not long after I had started and that's, you know, that's why we broke up, which was devastating at the time, you know, when your world is so small at that time, it was the biggest deal. I mean, I was really crushed by it. And then, you know, I had a couple of boyfriends in high school, but I think like for the purposes of this question, Steven, my high school sweetheart was the most impactful relationship that I had throughout high school. And we were on and off

for, I guess, really like two and a half years. And again, another incredibly meaningful relationship to me. And then I graduated high school and I moved up to LA and I met Brody Jenner almost immediately. And he was my first boyfriend in LA. I dated him for about a year. We had so much fun together. I don't think Brody and I were like a serious relationship, but I definitely would say he was, he was a boyfriend, you know, he was definitely a boyfriend and, or I shouldn't say that it was serious for 18 and 22, you know, but I mean, looking back now, it was like, that wasn't one that I'm like, oh, that was like, you know, changed my life, but I was crazy about him. And I,

you know, cherish our time together. I mean, I really look back on it with fond memories. And then I had a boyfriend when I was 19 for another year, this guy Nick. And that was my most serious relationship pre-marriage. I was the first guy I really lived with. Like I got rid of my place and moved in with him. You know, we told each other we loved each other. He was the first guy I really lived with. Like I got rid of my place and moved in with him. You know, we told each other we loved each other. He was also, God, he was nine years older than me. And I felt like we were like playing house and it was really fun. And I loved it. And I loved him and we had fun. And it was like a really deep, intimate relationship. And that was the first time I had really, really had that where

we could just sit on the couch and just talk and talk and talk. And he really wanted to get to understand me and I wanted to get to understand him. So I loved that relationship. But ultimately, what happened there was I wasn't ready to get married. I was so young. I was so young. And because he was so much older than me, he could have easily, I think, settled down. And it was actually our one-year anniversary and he gave me a necklace that said Mrs. on it. And I kind of like, I kind of like freaked out. So that ended. So that relationship ended. And then I was actually single for the first time in my life, like a pure, I remember it was like eight or nine months. And then, you know, again, like dated some people, but, and then I met my ex-husband when I was 23 and we moved very quickly. We got engaged after eight

months, called off the engagement for a minute, got back together. Um, and that's it. I have not had a boyfriend since my divorce. I've dated people. I'd say there's three people that you could really say I've like actually dated, but no one that I would consider a boyfriend. I think when I was first coming out of my marriage, I was like, I was having fun and I was like so excited and I was crazy about two guys in particular. But looking back, like I was just coming out of the fog and it was all like, it was just a lot. And so I don't, I, I really would not consider those to be boyfriends. So how many boyfriends have I had? I've had Johnny, Steven and Nick and my ex-husband. Well, I guess that's not really a boyfriend. I've

had four really, really serious, meaningful relationships in my life, I guess is the right way to put that. And that's not to say that other people weren't meaningful, but you know what I'm saying. All right. Well, this is a bit of a weird segue, but have you guys ever bailed on a party because you're so bloated you'd have to wear sweatpants out? I mean, hey, listen, no shame. Ritual literally created Symbiotic Plus with that weird gut stuff in mind. It contains clinically studied prebiotics, probiotics, and a postbiotic to support a balanced gut microbiome. I swear by probiotics. I think everything really stems from your gut. It is all about gut health. And so the fact that they have prebiotics, probiotics, and a postbiotic, I think is huge.

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one freaking time, I'm never texting you ever again. I mean, live by that because here's the thing. Even if, let's say, a guy saw your text and was like, I'll get to it later and then forgot, it got opened, he forgot. Okay. Well, if you like someone, you're thinking about them. So let's say I missed someone's text. Well, in a couple hours, I'd be like, oh my gosh, I haven't heard from so-and-so for a while. I should like, what the fuck? And then you would go to text them. So if a guy is not texting you, he's not that interested in you. And I will stand by that until the day I die. You feel him pulling away. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. You need to be going out. You need to be

meeting new people. You match his energy. In fact, pull away more. I'm telling you, that's not a good sign. Match the energy or pull away more.'m telling you that's not a good sign match the energy or pull away more Do you regret marrying so young? So no, I don't because as cliche as it is. I really think everything i've gone through has made me who I am and I mean Getting married obviously it got me my three kids, but it got me to Franklin, Tennessee. It ultimately led me to launch Uncommon James because I was living in Chicago and I really needed something to do. And I'm so thankful for that. That's what I'm proud of, the most proud of professionally. And so as you get older, I've always said,

I feel like life is like building blocks and it all kind of really starts to make sense. And I'm so thankful for my time with my ex. I mean, so thankful. It ultimately led me to finding myself. I learned a lot. I mean, there were some fucking hard times, but now that I'm on the other side of it, I'm so thankful for it. I'm thankful for it all because I find that in the most challenging times, that's where the most growth is. And no, so no, I really don't regret anything in my life. Are there moments I'm maybe not proud of? Sure. But I don't regret anything. I really don't. I really don't. Am I going to tell my kids to wait until they're in their thirties to get married? Yeah, probably. Just because you change so much. I mean, we change so much, you guys. Think about it. I'm 36. I'm almost 37. I don't even know who I was at 23. I am a completely different person. And yes, there's

things about me that are the same, but I'm a different person. And I think my goal in life is to continuously be evolving and growing. And I guess it's really about finding someone that you can evolve and grow with. But it's hard when you're that young to find that anyways. Or at least it was for me, I think, because I've changed so much. Well, most of my growth actually, I would say, has been in the last four years. But there was a lot in my late 20s and whatnot So, okay. What's the best date you've been on since your divorce? This is a fun question. I've been on some good dates. I have, and I've gone on a lot of dates with some interesting people, which I would love to give you the list of names, but that just causes

shit storms for me. But I've gone on some great dates. I think two things can make a good date. It can just be like logistically a great date, like someone pulling out all the stops for you, like you're doing all the things, right? Like that's like cool and exciting and like, wow, this guy really like took the time to plan this date. But also I think an even better date is when you're just vibing with someone. You guys are just clicking. You have that chemistry. It's fun. You're laughing. All of a sudden, you're like, holy shit, it's been five hours. Oh my God. That's the best date, which could be at a dive bar. You know what I'm saying? But okay, so for the purposes of this

question, there's two dates that stand out in my mind with the same person. So I went out with someone who lives in LA. He's a musician and we had to do something private because otherwise it would have been, it would have been a nightmare. And so what he did was he rented out the penthouse suite at a hotel. I'm not going to say which one, but it has a really great view of the city. And we had dinner on the patio with the sunset overlooking LA. And that was one of those dates where all of a sudden five hours had gone by. And I was like, whoa, oh my God. And it just flowed. So it was kind of both, checking off both boxes. And I kissed him. Well, he kissed me, I should say. We were just sitting at this table

the whole night, you know, ate dinner. And then we were just kind of hanging. Also, by the way, I had like a drink and a half, which was, and I only say that because I feel like a lot of times on first dates, like I'll definitely have a couple of drinks at least. Cause you're, there's like nerves and stuff, but I was completely 10 and two the entire date, which I think says a lot. And we were just kind of like sitting there and he like moved all the glasses out of the way and he leaned in to kiss me. Very sweet. So that was very sweet. But I just, again, I felt like because it was all just very romantic and sweet, which I loved. If you're watching, you can see my Bernadudo. Doodles are kind of a crazy breed. Okay, get down. And then, so I actually was in LA for I think like five or six days that trip. And I ended up going out to

Malibu with my girlfriends that weekend. And then I ended up seeing him again when I came back into West Hollywood. And for our second date, same thing, needed to be private. And he rented out another suite at a hotel, but this one had a pool. So we went swimming. We were just kind of hanging out. And then we showered, not together, showered, got ready for dinner. And same thing, had dinner on the patio. And I think that one was like an eight-hour date or something with swimming and everything. And they were really great dates, just like really pulled out all the stops for me, which I thought were very sweet. Ultimately, we weren't compatible, I think is kind of what happened. And those things do happen,

you know, but those were two dates that I'm like, okay, that was, that was sweet. That was cool. But again, like my favorite dates are, I don't know. It's like, I think I just went on my favorite date actually. I had a weekend with someone and I think because of how I feel about this guy and how much we have in common and how we just really clicked, that's my favorite date. But I'm going to, I'm going to put a pin in that. I'm going to talk to you guys about that one later on in another episode. Because I have to catch you up to speed on what happened with Hotman from Raya in LA. It's like a whole thing. So just wait for that one. Okay. I think any of the tips you've gotten from podcast guests will change your dating game. So I mean, yeah, you guys, yes. I am all about the girl making the first move now. Holy shit. I never

thought in a million years I would say that. I've had a lot of my friends telling me that it's okay to make the first move, but I've always been like, I don't know. I just don't think I can do it. And then I had Nick Vile come on right as I joined Raya. And he was like, why can't you make the first move? So I'm here to tell you, I made the first move with two different guys on Raya. One of them was hot man from Raya that I told you guys about in another episode. And the other person is the guy that I just had my favorite date with. I DM'd both of these guys. So you guys, I am changing my freaking tune on the girl making the first move. I am. I am. This is a whole new me. Holy shit. I can't even believe I'm saying this, but yeah. So thank you, Nick Vial. And I think too, because he said that his fiance made the first move with him and clearly they're engaged and they're having a baby. So this shit can work. Would you

consider creating a clean makeup brands? Well, I love this question. Yeah. So uncommon beauty is my skincare line and it is doing really well, which makes me so freaking happy because I love these products. I was selfishly just creating products that I wanted and it's doing well. So now we're developing all kinds of products. I mean, we have so many in the works, you guys. I'm so excited to share everything with you, but yeah, I do think we're going to do clean makeup. I do. And it's not, I have no desire to be the next, oh God, like NARS, you know, we're not going to have everything under the sun. I think it's more just about your staples, your everyday staples and a couple of shades and maybe a lip tint, some eye colors and stuff like that. But other than that, I have no desire to be like the next

robust makeup line. So yes, that is coming. It takes a while though to get something like this off of the ground, but we are working on it. I will spill that tea for you. It's in the works. So I'm very, very excited for sure. Not until probably the end of 2024, maybe 2025. So, but we, I will keep you posted on when that was coming down the pipe. Do you feel pressure to get work done because you're in the public eye? This is such a good question. Oh gosh. So yes and no, if I'm being completely honest, I think it can be hard because I'm constantly judged on my looks and I'll get anything from, I've said this in another episode, but I'll get anything from she's aging horribly to she's had so much work done, which again, I just feel like those contradict one another. So at the end of the day,

I can't win no matter what I do. I think for me, I really notice if I'm watching even like these podcast videos or whatnot, I notice how much my face moves because not a lot of faces on TV or in the public eye move, right? And I'm just, this is me just having an honest conversation with you guys. So I notice it a lot, but it doesn't bother me. I think, I don't know. I don't know if it's because I've been dealing with criticism on my looks since I was 17 years old. I don't know if it's because in the last few years, I've really gotten to a place of like full acceptance of myself. Or if it's because there's like this rebellious nature in me to always kind of go against the

grain and like a little bit of like a fuck you, I'm not going to do it because you expect me to sort of a thing, if that makes sense. Maybe it's a combination of all of them. But I like to think I'm stronger than succumbing to getting work done just because I'm in the public eye. And in fact, because I'm a mom and a mom to a daughter, I think I have this sort of role to be a role model for my daughter and maybe hopefully other young women out there. For me, it's more about accepting myself and realizing, you know, I'm not 25. I'm almost 37. And so do I have some lines on my face? Yeah. Does my face move a lot? Yeah. But you know what? That's okay. I want to age gracefully. And you know, I look at my mom. My mom is 70 and she looks good. She looks really good. And she's embraced

her age and her natural beauty. And I think there's something to be said for that because also I don't want to be chasing something my whole life. You know, I'd rather just be happy with where I'm at. I'm not trying to be 25 anymore. I'm not trying to be fucking 30. I'm really happy with where I'm at in my life. So I think that that's sort of the thing. But the flip side is we're all our own worst critics. And I think having to look at yourself a lot can be kind of exhausting in a way where you're kind of always picking yourself apart. I think more than anything for a long time, it affected my weight. I think that's why everyone gets so thin in Hollywood is because you see a picture of yourself or one bad angle and you're like, oh my God, it looks so fat. In reality, I will say that people are always smaller in person, usually. Usually people are

always smaller in person, girls and guys. And so I think that's more where you can kind of get like super self-conscious and make yourself go crazy. And I actually, even in the last year, I've had to be like, okay, I look bigger in photos because I am bigger than I was a few years ago. But in person, I think I look way better than I did when I was super thin. Well, probably even in pictures, I look way better. But yeah, I think I look way better than I did when I was super thin. Well, probably even in pictures, I look way better. But yeah, I think really what it boils down to is that we're all our own worst critics, really. And so it's just kind of taking that into consideration. I think it's more just like how you feel. Like if you feel good, who gives a fuck, honestly? And I don't

read, for the most part, I don't read Instagram comments. Because I also think good or bad, that's not normal for someone. It's not normal for someone to be told how much everyone loves them. That's also not normal. And it's also not normal to have people bashing you constantly. So I just think that removing myself from really putting my value in people's opinions, I think has helped a lot. I definitely feel like I just rambled a lot, but hopefully I gave you a very thorough answer. Great time of year for me to be chatting with you guys about alcohol delivery. Are you guys hosting this holiday season? Drizzly is the best app to get drinks delivered for Friendsgiving or Thanksgiving. It's also the perfect place to grab a gift for your Friendsgiving or Thanksgiving host. Save some dough on your party by comparing prices on the biggest selection of beer,

wine, and spirits from local stores. Drizzly is the go-to app for drink delivery. I also love Drizzly, you guys, because when you're in a pinch and you're like, oh crap, I forgot to get someone a present, you can just go on and have it delivered, which saves you time and energy. And I live for stuff like that. Drizzly is great, you guys, if you are running around doing a million errands and you can't go to a liquor store. This is always a nice last minute thing. I love any kind of delivery thing because I kind of live out in the middle of nowhere. So I'm kind of far from any sort of store. So I rely on delivery stuff all of the time. I also love that they have

literally everything. They have the biggest selection and it's cool because you can compare prices. So, you know, you're getting a good deal. All right, guys, download the Drizzly app or you can go to drizzly.com. That's D-R-I-Z-L-Y.com. Must be 21 and older and it's not available in all locations. Again, that's the Drizzly app or you can go to drizzly.com. Must be 21 and older, not available in all locations. Okay, guys, let's chat about clothing brand Loft. 2023 marks Loft's biggest selection of outerwear yet. Loft is a vibrant destination for this season's coats, jackets, and blazers in a range of modern staples and on-trend silhouettes where fashion meets function. This holiday season, Loft can be your go-to, check-everybody-off-your-list destination.

Give gifts galore, both in-store and online. Shop a mix of gifts under $35, festive finds, merry sweaters. Loft is back and better than ever with a fall collection of fun, feminine fashion. Loft has orchestrated a modern mix of a fall collection of fun, feminine fashion. Loft has orchestrated a modern mix of all day, any day pieces that offers endless versatility. We're talking plays on proportion, soft, touchable textures, exciting new ways to layer with ideas on how to effortlessly put together and pull off their latest have to have styles. This fall collection is definitely one to celebrate and includes everything you need to build stylish, feel good outfits top to toe. You guys, I can attest to this. I just got a ton of really cute jackets that I'm so excited to wear now that the

weather is definitely dipping below the seventies. I can pull some of these out and this is my favorite time of year for those awesome jackets. So I'm so excited. And as a thank you for listening from now through January 1st, 2024, use code honest at loft.com to receive $25 off your full price purchase. Exclusions apply. See podcast description for terms. All right. You guys know I'm always on the lookout for ways to strengthen immunity and gut health, improve my fitness and metabolism and enhance my skin and hair radiance. Well, I recently discovered an incredible product, Armra Colostrum. I don't know if you guys are familiar with Colostrum or not, but it is packed with vitamins and minerals. It's supposed to be so

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off your first order. That's T-R-Y-A-R-M-R-A.com slash honest. I want to know about your process of business. I want to create my own business. Well, first of all, that's awesome. I'm so excited for you. I think the most important thing to know is that running your own business? Well, first of all, that's awesome. I'm so excited for you. I think the most important thing to know is that running your own business is not for the faint of heart. It will test you in ways you never knew you could be tested. And it is going to be very difficult for a period of your life. But when you can get to the other side, it's the most beautiful thing on the planet. So my advice is fucking do it and don't let people discourage you because why is it? Anytime you have an idea, people love to shit on it. Everyone loves to shit on it. Everyone has an opinion.

Everyone thinks they know if something's going to be successful or not. Guess what? Who gives a fuck? Do you, if you in your guts know you have an idea and you're passionate about it and you're driven, you're unstoppable. I didn't go to college. You guys, I don't have a BA. I don't know the fuck I'm doing, but you know what I do have? I'm hardworking. I'm passionate. And I have this fire in me to like prove to everybody that I know what I'm doing in the branding world. That was on it. Well, now I am not like motivated by that fire so much anymore. But in the beginning, that was my motivation. I was like, I'm going to show everybody that I can create a fucking sick ass brand that's going to be successful. And motivation doesn't always come from a pure

place. It doesn't. A lot of times it comes from a place like that or like a dark place. And that's okay. Use whatever motivation you can to go kick some ass. I didn't have a business plan. I didn't sit down and was like, okay. And you know, I literally, all I did, you guys, I knew I wanted to do jewelry. I found someone to create my website and I found a manufacturer. Boom. That's it. Done.

Here we go. I'm launching this line. In hindsight, are there things I would have changed? Abso-fucking-lutely. The first collection was a disaster, but fine. Was it the right or wrong way? I don't know. I'm someone who works off of gut and I just like go. I'm impulsive. I'm just like, boom, boom, boom. And that's what I did. Here I am six years later and Uncommon James, like I said, is the thing I am most proud of professionally. And I'm so thankful for it. I'm so thankful for it for a million reasons. And I think, again, if you guys have an idea, do it. Also, every market is saturated. Every market. Jewelry,

candles, skincare, home decor, fucking everything. Sweats. Everything is saturated. Every market, jewelry, candles, skincare, home decor, fucking everything, sweats, like everything is saturated. So it doesn't matter. It's not like you have to have some like brilliant genius, different idea. Again, if you have passion and you're driven and you fucking bust your ass, you can do whatever the hell you want. And also it's a little bit of that, like the Lulu mentality of like, no, I'm going to fucking crush it. Like there's not, you can't, you're not going to let your negative energy spew into my, like, I know what I'm doing. Like I on the prize and then hunker down, kick some ass and fucking grind. And I on the prize, because there was a few years where I was like, this is taking everything in me. And I had three little

kids. I was filming a show. I was writing a cookbook. I had way too much on my plate at one point in time when Uncommon James was really getting going. But you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way because now it's coasting. And now I'm really happy. So busting my ass for a few years, definitely worth it. So you've got this. If someone sees you out, do you like when they come up and say hi, or would you rather them not? No, I love meeting people. People are always very cool and respectful. The only time where I'm like, oh, hang on is if I'm like literally putting food in my mouth. So maybe wait until I'm done chewing. But no, I've always loved when people come up to me. I have never said no to a photo unless it was like I was, you know, like getting in the car, like having to like go

like if I'm like rushed to go somewhere. But I've never said no to anybody. I'm very friendly. I promise you if you see me out, come say hi. I also know I have the best fucking fans. I literally was just with somebody and people come up to me and he said, you have the coolest fans. Like literally a guy noticed how cool my fans are. So no, I love knowing who my fans are. I, and if it wasn't for you guys, nothing in my life would exist. My life would be very different. So please come and say hi and I'll take a picture with you or I'll do a shot of tequila with you. Let's do the damn thing. Breakup advice. I recently ended my engagement due to cheating but having a hard time. Breaking up is the hardest thing to do. I don't care what side of it you're on. I don't care what the circumstances are. It's extremely difficult. Cheating is really fucked

up. And I'm sorry. That sucks that you guys were engaged and he cheated on you. I think ultimately you made the right decision because when trust is gone, you have nothing. I think during a breakup, what you have to do is do not look at their social media like ever. And if that means you have to do is do not look at their social media, like ever. And if that means you have to block them, then block them. Because it's not one of those things where you can sit here and be like, no, no, I'm not looking at his social media. But really like at night you're stalking him. You have to completely cut all contact, all contact. It gets a little dicey when you have to co-parent with someone. I get that. But that offers up its own set of challenges. That can be very difficult. But if you can,

do no contact. And even if you have to co-parent with someone, don't look at their social media. Like it should be like as little communication as possible. And I think it's important to stay busy. Staying busy during a breakup is the most important thing. So what does that mean? It means rallying your friends, going and doing whatever. If that means going for a hike and you get to cry and complain about it, do that. Because also I think it's really important to allow yourself to feel all of those feelings. When I was going through my divorce, it's the first time in my life I said, you know what? I just want to feel it all. I want to experience all of this. The good, the bad, the ugly. I'm going to sit in it where previously in my life, if something was hurtful, painful, if it made me sad, I wanted to like get away from it as quickly as possible.

I think there's a lot to learn in that sadness. I really do. And I think, you know, the most important thing too is to know that will pass. There will be a day where you are over it and you've moved on. And I promise you that. I mean, that's like, we know that. And I know in the midst of it, it seems like it's never going to end. It will. And I think just remembering that this is temporary, this is temporary, this is temporary is really important. And instead being like, okay, what can I take away from this situation? What can I learn? What can I gain? And I know a lot of you can be like, he fucking cheated on me. Like there's nothing to take away. No,

there is. I don't care what the situation is. There's always some takeaway from everything, even if it's the shittiest relationship. Well, what can that tell you about you? Why did you attract a really negative partner? That's something I had to fucking deal with you guys. I was like, I'm the one to blame. Like people can, people are just being themselves, but it was my fault that I let people treat me the way that they did. So I had to find where that lack was coming from. So my point is, I think if we just really look at it and take away what we can from it, that's helpful. And also allowing yourself to just be in those feelings. It's a grieving period. It just is. And that's okay. It takes time sometimes. And I think that's okay. Okay. Why you keep your children's identity private. Totally,

totally respect it, but would love to hear. So, okay. So we decided, both my ex and I decided that we were going to do that until they're old enough to make that decision for themselves. We live in a world now where everything, people's entire lives are put out on social media, kids included. And listen, that's fine. I love seeing my friends' kids. And by the way, I do post my kids on close friends. So my friends who live in Chicago and LA and whatnot do get to see my kids. But for the public, I don't know if my kids are going to want their lives to be public like that. They might not, right? I mean, for all I know, one of my kids could be like, I don't want anyone knowing who I am really or like

what I look like and stuff. And I want to respect that for my kids. I don't want to rob my kids of making that decision. So, I mean, really, that's it. It's not. And I mean, I think are there other reasons? Sure. Of like, you know, now they're not being judged publicly on social media because, you know, by the way, my kids are old enough now, like they could go and read comments on my social media if they wanted to, or, you know, just like, you know, the safety of my kids and you sure. But like the real reason is because when they're old enough, which I don't know, maybe that'll be 15, 16. I don't know yet. But when they're old enough, they can make the decision to put their lives out there. We're not going to make that for them. It's really that simple. And by the way, my oldest wants to be a YouTube star basically. So

it's only a matter of time when he can have social media. And if he's posting himself, I would, I'm going to, I'll post him. Like I would love to share my kids with you guys because it's the biggest part of my life that I'm not able to share. And also my kids are so fucking cute. Like are you kidding? Of course I want to show my kids, but, and they're fun and they're funny. They're like all the things, obviously like every mom says that about their kids, but, but I, I would love to share that with everybody. So yes, I think there will come a time and place when I can share my kids with you guys. Okay. When you find yourself settling because you're lonely, is it a bad thing to hang with Mr. Right

now? Ooh, this is a good one. So there's two ways you could look at this. I think, okay, what really stands out to me in this question is that you're lonely. I think what you need to do is find out why you're lonely. To me, that says there's some sort of lack that you feel. Ideally, the best place to get is being happy on your own, being fulfilled, happy, content, all the things. Because really that's when you attract the best possible partner. That's like, if you could have two people who are really happy on their own, and then they just come together, that to me is like pure magic, I would think, in a relationship. So I think first it's getting in touch with yourself about why you're feeling lonely. And listen,

I get it. I think there's a difference between feeling lonely and just wanting someone to share your life with, wanting a partner. I'm very happy on my own. I have loved being single. I have finally figured out who the fuck I am, gotten in touch with myself. But I've had moments where I'm like, would it be nice to have a man with me? Yeah. To share my life with, to have those nights of like just making dinner together and talking all night. Like, yes, I've missed those moments. And when I'm always the third wheel with my fucking husband and his fiance, it would it be nice to have a guy? Yeah, it would. But I've leaned into making the most of it of like, okay, well, here's a good example. So Justin Scoot and I went to, where

did we go last spring? We went to Finland, Stockholm, and then Iceland. My ex had the kids for spring break. So it was like, but it would like ended up being longer than it usually is. So we were like, let's get the fuck out of here. And so, but in Stockholm, well, actually in Finland, we had the cutest guide for our Northern light tour. He asked me out like that was fun. Stockholm. I met the hottest guy, the hottest guy. Oh, we've actually kept in touch a little bit. I haven't talked to him that much lately, but like, I couldn't do that if I was with a guy. So I think it's like leaning into what you have, like what your current situation is making the most of that. Because also what I've told myself in the last few years is like, I know I'm going to be in a relationship. Like that's eventually

going to happen. So enjoy being single right now, because I'm going to look back then and be like, why the fuck didn't I just enjoy it? Right. It's all, it's like making the most of what's right in front of you and just being present. And so, okay. And now the thing to, to hanging with Mr. Right now, I think you can look at it one of two ways. Do you want someone to just hang with, probably have sex with? Yes. If that's, if that's what you're okay with, then yeah, absolutely. I think you should do it. I've had some of those, okay, in the last couple of years. But I think where it gets tricky is, I think if you're serious about wanting a partner, like a real partner, a healthy relationship, a real guy, right? Or girl, you know, whatever. I think what the universe does is it tests you.

It's like, okay, you say you want X, Y, and Z. I'm going to send you X and Y, which is going to be really close. And let's see. Let's see if you're actually, if you mean what you say. I swear to God, because I have had, I know I have had some tests in the last year. I've had a couple. And each time, each test is like closer and closer to what I want. But it's like, time, each test is like closer and closer to what I want, but it's like, are you going to settle or are you going to really stay strong on what you actually want? And I really think you have to pay attention. And I also feel like each time you like pass the test of like, okay, no, I'm not going to put up with this bullshit.

Okay, great. So you're like pass that test. And then it's like, I just think like you get closer and closer. You're like upping your vibration, if that makes sense to then attract in what you ultimately want. That's why I don't think anyone should settle. And I listen, I get it's easier for me to say, because I, I have three kids. I it's like, I'm in a different phase in my life. If I was 25, why wouldn't have this knowledge first of all, but I don't think this conversation would look the same. I get that where I'm at currently in my life is very different than a lot of people. What I ultimately want is the most amazing man. And I'm not going to settle. And I have had some guys that have been really close. They're not everything I want. And because I'm happy on my

own and my life is so great on my own, I'm not going to settle. So I think the important thing to do is get in touch with yourself, figure out why you're feeling lonely so that then you aren't attracting these like meh kind of a guys. And then you can actually attract someone who is fucking awesome. Okay, you guys, I think what we're going to do, because there's so many great questions, let's press pause and we're going to turn this into a two-parter. So I will continue to answer questions, but that will be next week. Okay. So thank you for submitting these questions. This is really fun. And I'll see you guys for part two next week.