Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - Mushrooms, the CIA, and Energy Alchemy, Oh My! with Christine Thompson

Episode Date: November 25, 2025

This week, I sit down with my friend and spiritual guide Christine Thompson for an honest conversation around psilocybin, plant medicine, and surrender. We get into how to know when it is (an...d isn’t) your season to explore plant medicine, why curiosity matters more than “fixing,” and the unexpected skillset you actually need before you ever take a journey.We talk trauma, intention, and why psilocybin isn’t an “easy button.” Christine shares how she discovered the power of mushrooms, the life-changing moment on a Florida beach that cracked her open, and what she’s learned after nearly a decade of guiding others through this inner work.A word from my sponsors:K18 - Shop K18 mask at Sephora or get 10% off your first purchase with code KRISTIN at K18hair.com.Skims - Shop my favorite pajamas at SKIMS.com And if you’re looking for the perfect gifts for everyone on your list - the SKIMS Holiday Shop is now open at SKIMS.comForia - Get 20% off your first order by visiting foriawellness.com/HONEST OR use code HONEST at checkoutARMRA - Go to armra.com/HONEST or enter HONEST to get 30% off your first subscription order.Cymbiotika - Go to Cymbiotika.com/Honest for 20% off plus free shippingThe Real Real - Get $25 off your first purchase when you go to TheRealReal.com/honestFor more Let's Be Honest, follow along at:@kristincavallari on Instagram@kristincavallari and @dearmedia on TikTokLet's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari on YouTubeProduced by Dear Media.This episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 The following podcast is a dear media production. This is Let's Be Honest with Kristen Cavalry, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality TV, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing. Oh, today is going to be a fun episode and one that I've really been looking forward to for months. She is a friend, but she is also one of the most incredible women I've ever met. Christine Thompson, she is a sought-after executive advisor to visionary leaders and power brokers in business, entertainment, and culture. Christine explores an unconventional approach to leadership that utilizes chaos, both internal and external, as a tool to support growth, expand perspective, and hone mastery. I think you guys are going to have a lot of takeaway today. Enjoy. I am so excited that you're here. This has been months in the making. Months. And I have a feeling this is probably going to be one of my favorite conversations that I've had on the podcast. So, Christine, welcome. Thank you. So I want to start by, I want you to explain in your own words, what your job is. Because I have my idea in my head, but I want to hear it from you. It is a really great question, Kristen, because I feel like I feel like, I feel like,
Starting point is 00:01:28 I could give a different answer every time someone asks me this because it is a continually evolving thing. I identify as a business strategist in the human condition. So it's combining business strategy who we are as human beings and how to understand ourselves more deeply so that we can do what we're meant to do in the world in the biggest way possible and to do it with joy and fulfillment and impact and influence. And so what my work is identifying the architecture of that for each individual person because it's a very specific, unique expression that each person has using psychology to do that, using neuroscience to do that. On my website, it says modern mysticism. Who even knows what I'm talking about? Because I'm actually referencing hundreds of modalities with those two small words. But it just gives me a little bit of latitude to think very differently about this work than most of my peers. Okay, so you definitely explained it way better than I ever could have. So when people come to you, is it because they're in a place of turbulence and they need, you know, better direction or are people
Starting point is 00:02:40 coming to you to optimize where they're at? Like, who are your clients and who's coming to you? It's both. There are, I like to say I work with people with a lot of energy around them. So whether that's energy of having influence, energy of having a lot of wealth, energy of having of having a leadership position in a company. I work a lot of CEOs. I work with public figures. I work with family offices. And people come to me in all different kinds of situations. Yes, there are absolutely the moments of turbulence where it feels like someone's at the end of their rope. And they just need to try something a little bit more outside of the box and unconventional than they would have normally. So I love those because I get the chance to work with people who maybe wouldn't
Starting point is 00:03:23 have chosen to do this level of depth work through the lens of their life, except in this instance, that they're like, I just, I have no, I have nothing else to try might as well. And a lot of really amazing transformation happens with those people. But I also work with people who are just at the top of their game and really wanting to explore their, their visionary capacity and wanting to explore their legacy. And as I said, their impact and influence. And so bringing fluency to who they are and understanding the depth approach of everything that they want to create and have created thus far and how it all connects together in this really cool map just allows them to speak into existence and to action on what that is for them in a more effective
Starting point is 00:04:10 way. I love it. So what are some of the tools that you use for all of your clients? I know plant medicine is one of them. Plant medicine is one of them for, for, A certain subset, not everybody. Okay. Not everybody. How do you determine who that is good for and who it's not? I like to have a qualifier, well, several qualifiers. So I think the journey to deciding whether or not a plant medicine experience is right for you is,
Starting point is 00:04:38 do you have the ability to let go of what you think you've known? Do you have the ability to reimagine and rethink every certainty you've ever had? Wow. Do you have the capacity to. to like redefine who you are fundamentally based on new information that you haven't been aware of before. Wow. Okay. Okay. So if someone is not doing plant medicine, what are some of the tools that you're going to use with them? There's a lot. I've trained in a lot of very interesting modalities. There's been, I've been an apprentice with this woman who's been doing energy alchemy for 50 years in India and across all of these old world technologies. I've trained in something called Amadeus in Ecuador.
Starting point is 00:05:25 I have trained in counterintelligence and hostage negotiation. I thought I was going to go into the CIA. Wow. Oh, I didn't know that. Yes, for a small moment. When was that? In college. Wow.
Starting point is 00:05:38 Yes. One of my professors was part of the intelligence community. It happened kind of like, have you ever seen the movie of The Recruit? I don't know that I have actually. Okay, well, it's like a CIA movie. And it's, you know, it happens on college campuses where there's, professors that are kind of low-key part of that community and they identify people who might make good operatives. You would have been good in the CIA. Right. And that's kind of what the
Starting point is 00:06:03 conversation. No one would have seen it coming. No one. Yes. Another life. And did you know that there's a difference between a CIA agent and an operative? No. Okay. I don't know a whole lot about it. Very, very quick caveat because I know that's not our topic of conversation. But an agent is actually not someone who works with the U.S. government, who is a U.S. citizen. If you're a CIA agent, you are not a U.S. citizen. Did not know that. And so you're an operative. Wow.
Starting point is 00:06:34 An operative works for the U.S. government. An agent is actually usually someone that's a foreign national who the operative is asking to work with them to supply them information or relationships. that. Interesting. Yeah. So how far down that road did you get? Not, not very far. Not very far. A lot of people in my life are convinced that I'm still in the CIA. I can see it actually. I had a wild decade of traveling the world and people that even know me very well are like, Christine, you can tell me now. Oh, that is funny. Can you just admit it now, you know? But no, I really didn't. I had this professor and I did a research practicum for several years and we looked at Hosh and negotiation scenarios and tried to determine if we could predict the outcome of a hostage negotiation situation based on the way someone
Starting point is 00:07:26 was speaking. Whoa. And then therefore, the agents in the field, if they could have indicators and information on likely outcomes, they could approach the conversation differently. Wow. And then, and then I mean, I lived in the Middle East and I learned Arabic. I learned Mandarin. I lived in Montreal and learned French. I lived in Ecuador and learned Spanish. I mean, it was like a... I mean, you're the most impressive woman. It's true. I feel like languages came easy because I played piano. It wasn't it didn't feel. Meanwhile, I'm doing Rosetta Stone trying to learn Italian right now. And I just failed my first time. Wait, why are you learning Italian? Tell me everything. I just wanted something to do. I'm trying to delete a TikTok a few months ago. I was like, I need to do things that are better for my brain.
Starting point is 00:08:07 So I got Rosetta Stone. But I thought I was killing it. And then I had the first quiz and I failed miserably. Oh, no. Multiple times. So I was like, okay. I suck. But now I'm determined to actually learn it so that I can speak it. Now, now that I failed, I'm like, okay, that's what I needed to, like, light a little fire under my ass. Anyways. Okay, wait. So how did you then get into what you do today? It was, I like to joke that it kind of felt like I was in a maze.
Starting point is 00:08:33 I didn't know that I was in a maze, but I was in a maze. I didn't have this grand plan. I think that it's actually a nod to you do not have to have a 10-point plan about how your life needs to go in order to reach your goals. I think that goals are reached more on a feeling than an operation, if that makes sense. Because I knew that I wanted to have a career where I was interacting with people that I found incredibly fascinating. And I knew that I wanted to talk about ideas that really lit me up. I knew that I wanted to travel. And so, and there are a few other things. Like I wanted real connection in the world. And I wanted a pathway to have my career inspire me.
Starting point is 00:09:17 to discover myself as I went. And then it was kind of the symbiotic relationship, the more that I delved into my own self and what lit me up and drove me and fascinated me, the better I would then become it, whatever my career was. It was the way I was thinking. And I didn't know that if that even existed, but I wanted it to. So I then just made it exist, essentially. I love that. But I didn't realize that's what I was doing. So I decided not to go into intelligence by the end of undergrad. Like I was, I was clear on that at the end of undergrad because I realized that this career is a very particular one and you have to pretend to be who you're not in order to be good at it. And the thought occurred to me just, wait, if I'm pretending to be who I'm not for the majority of
Starting point is 00:10:04 the time and there are very few people that know who I really am, at what point do I lose myself? Yeah. And I really like myself. I've worked really hard to like know and love myself. So I don't want to have a career that is the opposite of that. So I went to a post-grad program at Vanderbilt, shout out Vanderbilt. Oh, nice. So that's how you got here. Well, I was born here. Oh, that's right.
Starting point is 00:10:29 You were. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My grandfather, my grandparents met at Vanderbilt. Oh, cute. But, yeah, I decided to just go full on into business strategy. Oh, wow. I mean, it was mainly just a generalization of, okay, I want to be successful in
Starting point is 00:10:43 the world. And I think business has something to do with that. Yeah, smart. Right? You know, one plus one equals two. And then it was like a connect the dots. Yeah. I didn't know the picture that I was forming. I just went to the next dot of what really felt intriguing to me. And so I moved to Southern California, actually, for my first job that I thought was management consulting. It was actually not management consulting. It was more of a sales job. But it got me to Southern California where I was like, I live in a vacation, y'all. I can drive. to the beach after work and watch the sunset over the ocean because I grew up, I went to the beach once a year. Right. And it was a huge deal. Yeah. You know, but overall, I just kept asking
Starting point is 00:11:25 questions about that set of circumstances that I knew I wanted in my daily life. So I was kind of thinking outside of job description and more of what is the experience of the job that I want. And so I eventually met this guy over dinner. He was the, I was with me. my friend, and she had just started dating this new guy, and he was his best friend. And we started talking, and I didn't know it at the time, but he was the chief investment officer for a billionaire out of Spain and London. And he was kind of covertly interviewing me for months and months, again, didn't realize. But he eventually offered me this job. And I became senior vice president of this billion-dollar family office. Oh, my God. And I was 25, 25, 26, 20.
Starting point is 00:12:13 27, 28. We created Formula E, the electric version of F1. Oh, my God. You know, like we were like doing all these insane networking things. Like Leonardo DiCaprio came on, started a team. Richard Brands started a team. We had China racing. We had Jaguar. We had, you know, it was really good. And it still exists today. It's really so cool. Yeah. So it was all about what, what can we create from nothing? How can we create equity from an idea.
Starting point is 00:12:45 How can we create bottom line value from relationships without having to write more checks? Can the value of relationships and the substance of what we're talking about and creating together in a way that really inspires people? And then they go and they put energy into that. How is that a real thing? Because that's not something we're taught in business school. Right. And so the chief investment officer and I, we had the best time. I'm just playing with this form of kind of energy dynamics in these really high-impact rooms. I mean, a lot of billionaires, a lot of people whose names, everyone knows that we were in
Starting point is 00:13:23 these rooms with, having these conversations with. I mean, I was watching decisions being made about how countries were run in a boardroom. That is wild. Yeah. And so I kind of got a behind the scenes look at what was really going on and how the kind of thinking it takes to vision and create possibility beyond. what seems reasonable. And I started to try and make sense of that, again, because I was kind of drinking from a fire hose. And I was here. And I had this skill set that I didn't realize
Starting point is 00:13:54 until much later, which is hilarious, the skill set of kind of psychologically analyzing behaviors, body language, motivations, all of this stuff. So I was watching deeply how this was all happening. So then I had the skill set. And then I had this very unique set of experiences. And I took all of that and started my own company in 2015. That is amazing. What a cool experience too. Yeah. So did you just start networking then? And then you could find some of these people and start just, that's where you started. Yep. And it's just as grown and grown. Yes. And then when did you come back to Tennessee? 20. So I like to say I moved my stuff back in 2012. But then I was pretty much just on an airplane until 2015.
Starting point is 00:14:38 when I got pregnant. Yeah. Okay. And then I was pretty much grounded. You're not going anywhere. To have the babies. Yeah, exactly. Well, so that's how we know each other is through our social circle.
Starting point is 00:14:49 We have a lot of the same friends. And we were supposed to do a journey, a group of us. Yes. And every time the date would approach, I couldn't do it for some reason. I've actually talked about this on the podcast. And I think it was after the third time, I finally was like, you know what? Maybe this isn't the season of life for me to do plant medicine. and I'm going to let everyone else do it.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Ended up just being one of our friends, which is great because she needed to have her own experience. But when it comes to plant medicine, and we've talked about this, because I am still really interested in doing a psilocybin journey. I think I talked about this on the podcast like two weeks ago. But how do you know when it's the right time in your life to experiment with psilocybin or any plant medicine for that matter? So plant medicines, regardless of which one we're talking about, I think they're all. in a category of enabling your mind to access more of what is real. This is my opinion. This is my opinion.
Starting point is 00:15:47 I think that we have to live these human lives with a certain filter on in order to function in the three-dimensional realms. And when you find yourself asking a question, you can't quite put your finger on. And don't feel like you need to clarify the question of the intention. But when you realize that there's probably something more to all of this, whatever that means for you, and you want to explore what that is, that probably means you're in a place to a place of willingness, a place of willingness to renegotiate how you've perceived yourself in your life up until that point. Wow. All right, guys. it is that time. I'm excited to talk to you about a new one today, and that is K-18. If you are not
Starting point is 00:16:44 familiar with K-18, then you're definitely going to want to listen up. I've told you guys over the years that I had a ton of breakage in my hair a few years ago, and it's really been a journey to get back to a great place. And one of the things that I've been using periodically on my hair is K-18. Also, what if I told you that you could bleach or color your hair without damage? With K-18, you can have soft, strong, bouncy hair, and keep going to the salon. K-18, leave-in molecular repair hair mask is a deep damage fix. It's not just a cover-up. And that's what I've been using to really get my hair back into a great place. It is a patented K-18 peptide, which repairs hair on the molecular level. So no matter what you do to your hair, whether it be color or just styling, or maybe it's even just
Starting point is 00:17:44 stress, well, K-18 will be there to help fix the damage. You guys can shop the K-18 mask at Sephora, or you can get 10% off your first purchase with code Kristen at K-18hair.com. That's code Kristen at K-118hair.com. Let's chat skims, guys. Today, I specifically want to talk to you about their pajamas. I'm all about being as cozy as possible while sleeping, and I do think the older I get, the quality of sleep is so important. And so that's part of it. Being comfortable, making sure you're not too hot. And with that,
Starting point is 00:18:26 depends on what you're wearing to bed. Well, Skims has incredible pajamas, guys. I feel like I sleep better when I feel good in the fabrics that I'm wearing. I just got a really cute little sleep set from Skims. The fabric really is so comfortable. And it's almost like you're wearing nothing. Also, they have the cutest holiday pajamas, too. So if you're looking for the whole family or just yourself, definitely go check that out as well. So shop my favorite pajamas at skims.com. And after you placed your order, be sure to let them know that I sent you. So select podcast in the survey and be sure to select my show. Let's be honest in the drop-down menu that follows. And if you're looking for the perfect gifts for everyone on your list, the skims holiday shop is now open at skims.com. Let's chat
Starting point is 00:19:10 colostrum. Specifically, I'm excited to talk to you guys about Armra. We live in an environment. Our biology was just never designed for. There's EMFs, artificial light, seed oils, microplastics, endocrine disruptors, modern stressors. I mean, the list goes on and on. And these assaults can disrupt your signals your body relies on, negatively impacting gut, immune, and overall health. Armor Colostrum works at the cellular level to bolster your health from within. Colostrum is nature's first whole food with over 400 bioactive nutrients that fortify gut health, strengthen immune health, fuel performance, and more. Paving the way for your best health and vitality. So if you're ready to reclaim your extraordinary, well, then you're going to need to
Starting point is 00:19:59 try colostrum. I've told you guys a million times, but I really do love colostrum. In addition to everything I just said, I also feel like it really ignites your metabolism. I think it helps with bloating and just gut health overall, and it really does make a difference if you're active in the gym working out for performance and recovery. So check it out if you have not. And I've worked out a special deal for my audience. You can receive 30% off your first subscription order. Go to armora.com slash honest or enter honest to get 30% off your first subscription order. That's A-R-M-R-A dot com slash honest. Okay. So curiosity. What about if someone, because I know it's used for trauma, right? Like it's, it's used a lot for helping people when they're going through something. Does it need to be coupled with curiosity or could it just be you have trauma from your childhood, let's say. And you've done talk therapy. It's only done so much. And now you just want to get deeper and deeper. Or does.
Starting point is 00:21:11 that scare you if it's just from a trauma standpoint? Yeah. I'm back and forth on this one. I know that the FDA is doing a lot of work here and there's a lot of really exciting stuff happening with, you know, official channels for these experiences in medicines. And I think that there's a place for all of it. With someone who has trauma, it really depends on the medicine that you're using. It depends on the practitioner that you're going to be working with. Are they trauma informed? And here's the real question, I think, because those are logistics and kind of more ops. But if you find yourself believing it's an easy button, I would hold off. Okay. That's, I like that a lot. Yep. It's not an easy button. In fact, if someone goes into an experience like that,
Starting point is 00:22:05 like that without the skill set that I do believe has to be cultivated before you enter that space, it can exacerbate. It can exacerbate some of the issues that make that trauma a hard day-to-day thing to live with. Okay. That makes sense. Yeah. And I know for you, you do a lot of work leading up to this kind of stuff with clients or friends or whoever or for your own personal. Yeah. And that is very important. And so that was a question. I want to talk about psilocybin specifically only because it's on my mind and I want to do it. But is that something that someone should do, could do by themselves or should they always have like a quote-unquote trained guide for something like that?
Starting point is 00:22:49 So I've been working with psilocybin for almost a decade now, which is wild because it was so, I would not breathe a word of this. Oh, yeah. To anyone for years because it felt so. I mean, I am a rule follower. I do all of the things by the book. You know what I mean? I do not step outside the lines in those conventional ways. I step outside the lines and how I think about the world and how I think about things, but not in that way.
Starting point is 00:23:14 And so I think that there are so many people who have absolutely done a solo journey and it has been fantastic for them. And I mean, even I'm thinking of some of the leaders in the field who got their start because they were in the woods and seven. Right. And you know how to transcend an experience that changed the way they thought about themselves in the world. And then they formed a career path or a life path from that place. And they point to that as being the nexus, you know. I think that if someone has a specific intention and they believe that they're going to be facing off with some difficult things, I do think it's a good idea to have a guide. I have been privy to situations, been in situations where people. people have said, if I did not have a guide for that, it would have been a very different outcome. You know, I think in this world, in this world, especially as this concept is the more popular. What is that word? Popularized. Popularized.
Starting point is 00:24:19 There have been kind of communities of people going into this, not blind, but thinking that it's something that it's not. And that can lead to outcomes that are not. great. Like when you, okay, so when you say an outcome that's not great, does that mean like someone loses their mind, goes a little crazy? Like, what does that exactly mean? Well, I'm thinking there are some plant medicines that are more prone to those outcomes than others. Is that like an ayahuasca? Yeah, that's more of an ayahuasca type experience. Something that's stronger. Yes. Maybe stronger is not the right word. Ah, just different approach. Like, ayahuasca to me, it takes, in order for
Starting point is 00:25:04 you to learn the lesson, it will remove all sense of stability. It will remove all remembrance of a concept called love. It will extract that so that you have to find your own center. Oh, my God. Yeah. And I mean, but it can also do the opposite. It can also be the most profound loving. It is. Yeah. The thing about plant medicines and whether we're talking about, you know, all of these fall into a category called, category called entheogens, which just means And that can be a T. Like we're not necessarily talking about psychoactive substances here. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:25:40 But the common thread, I think, is that you receive what you most need. Can you do the work necessary to be the version of yourself in the moment that you are having an experience, whether it's the most profound, incredible, loving, everything makes sense in a way that it never has before type of experience or, holy shit, what the hell of I done? done. Right. Yeah. That in that holy shit moment, if you can trust and know that this is for you, this is your medicine. It is your job to figure out how and why. Yeah. You will have a very different experience with that because you have an openness. You have an expanded capacity to hold the discomfort, to hold the duality of what you think you want versus what you're getting because isn't that a metaphor for life? Right. Exactly. So often the curveball is the thing that we're resisting.
Starting point is 00:26:37 And if we just open to it for long enough to get a different perspective, a lot of people will point to that unexpected traumatic curveball as the thing that somehow, some way, change them in a way that they wouldn't trade. It's so true. Okay. I want to hear about how Silesabin found you, because like you said, you never, you didn't experiment with anything. So Sillit how it found you and then what?
Starting point is 00:27:04 your first experience was like. Oh, so good. Yes. So I like to almost like overuse the testament that I had never done any kind of anything, y'all. Like I didn't, I don't even really drink alcohol. Yeah. I've never seen you drink. Yeah. Yeah. It's not, it's not my thing. Like I believe that anything that altered my mind was immediately bad. It was an immediate no. And like even even like seeing someone smoke a cigarette, I was like, oh. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm not saying I was judgmental, it just wasn't for me. I was just clear that that wasn't my journey. And even my little brother, my little brother was having experiences with, I mean, just like pot and stuff, like normal things. And I was like, oh, no, he's gone down the wrong road. You know what I mean? But I remember
Starting point is 00:27:50 him telling me that he had a mushroom experience and he was maybe 18 and I was 20 and I was in college, making stray days, doing all the things. And I was like, my brother's a degenerate. You know what I mean? Completely judging. I was judging him. So all of that to say, very tough cookie over here with all substances. And I had a best friend. I still love this man so much. His name was Jeff. And I felt that he knew me in a way that no one else knew me or understood me. Like we had this really, really soul level connection from this first moment that we met. We saw each other. And it's like we both lit up like sunshines and hugged each other. And it was like, oh my gosh, you're home. You know, you're one of my homes in this world. And he, it was my
Starting point is 00:28:32 birthday and there were a small crew of us down on 30A and he one of my friends flew in from New York and he had these chocolates and I was like have fun y'all like I guess I'll babysit yet again as I always do with all of the people doing the things and and Jeff looked at me and he said Christine it's not what you think oh trust me you have to trust me oh my God and I was like okay. Like, I don't think that there was any other person on the planet that could have gotten me to pop that chocolate in my mouth. Wow. And so, and no one prepped me. And here's a testament to like not having a guide and not having any prep. I mean, I've been doing very deep personal work for a long time. Okay. Yeah. But I just remember sitting on this beach and the sensation that I
Starting point is 00:29:27 even can feel now. I can even feel emotion rise now. And this was. almost 10 years, no, yeah, it was almost 10 years ago, is just the sensation of tears streaming down my face with a feeling of, I remember, I remember myself, I remember who I am, I remember why I'm here, I remember my power, I remember my dignity, I remember my integrity, I remember my unlimited capacity to love and receive love. I remember that I'm not from here. Wow. Not to get too woo.
Starting point is 00:30:04 But hey. But hey. And so what it did for me is it gave me such an expanded perspective on myself and on this lifetime that I was able to let go of things that I had been holding on to that suddenly didn't matter. Wow. And I was able to engage with myself on a new level that I believe allowed me, to come into myself because I immediately had trust for myself that I, it's like I did trust
Starting point is 00:30:33 myself to a certain extent, but not like this. Yeah. This felt like a self-trust that was invincible because I knew that everything was in perfect design. Wow. Yeah. Oh, that gave me chills. So, because I've asked you this, I think a thousand times. Because for me, trying something new, I think obviously the unknown is what's scary for I would imagine a lot of people that's I think that's the only piece that scares me it's not what's going to come up it's like none of that it's just I don't like being completely out of control and I've told you my buvo experience you are completely laid out like if the house was burning I cannot I cannot move like you have to carry me out of here and so I guess from that perspective what does psilocybin feel like like are you in control
Starting point is 00:31:23 or I guess I just have like no point of reference. Like I've done mushrooms in my day, but because you're eating what, like five, six grams? Yes, it's a lot. Yeah. And I think I've maybe eaten like one like at most, you know. So, okay, so explain that to me. Like, what is the actual journey of it and how do you feel? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:42 I wouldn't say that you feel out of control in the way that I think you mean it. Okay. Let me ask you. What do you mean when you say out of control? Yeah, I guess so like, okay, my point of reference is Bufo, I'm commenting. You can't walk. Like, I can't, no, you can't move. It's all in your head.
Starting point is 00:31:57 You can't move. I mean, I've done Molly before, but that I still feel like I'm kind of in control. So, I don't know. I guess just, I don't know, I guess. Those are my only points of reference. Yeah. Well, and you bring up two really interesting themes. I'll come back.
Starting point is 00:32:13 I'll come back to the question just a second. So the unknown is a theme for, I would say, most people. Yeah. Right? Because if you don't know what it is, how. can you know what it's going to be like? And if you can't know what it's going to be like, how do you know you're going to be okay? Right. You know? And so we, we tend to navigate life through a series of trying to know things, predict things, and make things happen that we want to
Starting point is 00:32:38 happen because that's what we've decided that we know and that it will be safe and good. Yeah. And I'm a bit of a control freak. Right. Yeah. Yes. And so then the unknown and controlling the experience or the outcome, those are deeply linked. Yeah. And I think, order to have the best kind of experience you have to let go of both control and the need to know. Yeah. Which is why I think the lead up to the experience can be such a profound part of the experience. I often will get, you know, I'll be sitting with someone who is. Oh, hold on we need that. Was that, I mean, energy. Has that ever happened? That's never happened. The camera just fell. Is that mean, I have to do a journey? Yes. Anything is a sign. That does. We have to.
Starting point is 00:33:23 Oh my God. As we're talking about the unknown and control. That is funny. Wait. Nothing's ever a coincidence. I don't think. Yes. Fine. I'm ready. We're ready. We're doing it. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. How funny was that. That was wild. Cool. I love shit like that. Me too, especially when you cannot anticipate. Okay. And let's just pause for a moment. and capture the magic of what just happened. So just now. Yeah. So we're talking about the unknown and letting go of control and a camera just fell.
Starting point is 00:34:03 And a camera just fell. And I always feel like when things like that happen, it's like confirmation for whatever you're currently saying. Yes. Right? Yes. Okay. And what is so wild about the reason that was a big deal and we're like, whoa.
Starting point is 00:34:20 And it's a sign and it's a synchronicity. and we're impacted by that is because we didn't predict it. Okay. Okay. Yes. We didn't know that was going to happen. That was completely outside of our control. If I had asked you at the beginning of this, would you prefer if a camera fell down in the middle of our taping?
Starting point is 00:34:36 I would have said no. You would have said no. But guess what? It did. And we're okay. And not only are we okay. It is profound and meaningful. I like that.
Starting point is 00:34:45 Because we didn't know. I love that. And because we couldn't control it. Fine. I'll do a psilocybin journey. I mean, I have. have chills because that connects exactly to the essence of what we're saying here. Wow.
Starting point is 00:35:01 That is very cool. Truly. Wow. I love, I love shit like that. I know me too. I don't even remember what we were saying. I mean, we were talking about how you have to come into relationship with, you have to come into a positive way of seeing, letting go of control and letting go of the fact of needing
Starting point is 00:35:21 to know. So embracing the unknown and embracing the lack of ability to control is actually the portal to the magic. It's the portal to transformation and evolution because true transformation can't be anticipated. It's the element of surprise, of delight, of like discovery. If you know the thing or you're controlling it, you're not discovering. Yeah. That's such a good point. Right.
Starting point is 00:35:46 And that's true of life. That's true of journey. That's true of this moment with the camera. So my, yeah, exactly. My Bufo experience, what happened was, it's only 20 minutes, but 20 minutes is not, time isn't a concept when you're doing this stuff. But I had a couple moments in my journey where I was like, I'm ready for this to be over. And I think that is what scares me about then doing psilocybin. However, when I came out of my Bufo experience, I was like, I get it now.
Starting point is 00:36:14 You have to go on the journey, surrender and lean in and go. And then I was like, I want to do it again. I want to do it like right now. So I do think having that knowledge, I would carry that with me then into psilocybin of like, yes, it's not going to last forever. And then once it's over, you're like, holy shit, I get it. So just lean in. Yes.
Starting point is 00:36:37 It is a round trip ticket. It's a lean in no matter what. Trust that whatever's coming up is for you no matter what. And if you're having a hard experience and you're like, I want this to be over. my first question, if I was sitting with someone in that situation, would be what part of this is uncomfortable? That's why the guide is very important. It is because then when you start to name it, then that's almost always going to have a metaphorical or actual application to life itself. And then you get insight that you couldn't get otherwise because you are struggling
Starting point is 00:37:14 with something. And so when you can kind of name that it's kind of, it's vapor, really, because it's imagined. It's, it's, it's, you don't like what you're experiencing because you think it should be different. Right. What if you knew that this is exactly what you're meant to be experiencing because there is an intelligence behind it. What if you knew that because you're experiencing, you somehow needed it or asked for it? Yeah. And it's part of your journey, which is why you then lean in and then you will get it. But in the resistance, it's the continued resistance that you keep yourself from the knowledge. So what do you do with someone if they really are resisting and they're having a hard time and they don't want to be doing this? Like how do you, besides like,
Starting point is 00:37:58 let's give it a name, how do you coach someone through that? It's hard. Yeah. And I will say that I've sat with many, many, many, many, many people over the years. And this is a very rare thing. Oh. Oh. For someone to really be stuck in, I need this to be over right now. Oh, well, that's good. Yeah. It's good. Does it happen initially? I don't know if it's because of how I hold this days. It's all because of you. I really do think that a lot of these medicines are very gentle and loving. It's like, you know, baseline. Does it, I think even our friend, the first 45 minutes or so, there's like a moment of resistance, but then you're able to push through. Is that more common or even that's not. Yeah. Yeah, it is because the journey kind of, it goes up a little bit
Starting point is 00:38:47 and then it dips you back into normalcy and then it goes up a little more and then it dips you back to where you were. So it's very much, at least the medicines that I like to work with. Okay. It's not just going to blast you in. It's good. It's a like first that you'll be like, wait, do I hear a bird? And is that the most gorgeous thing I've ever heard in my entire life? Is there something extra funny about that leaf? And has the sky ever been this blue? I love that. You know?
Starting point is 00:39:18 And so you're just kind of, you're in it. And you're like, whoa, this is cool. And then you'll be like, wait, actually, the sky is normal and that's a normal bird. Okay. Anyway, we're going to continue talking. And then it'll kind of take you up. God. And then before you know it, you are in the center of the infinity vortex,
Starting point is 00:39:36 understanding the full nature of reality. Would I love that. Okay. So it's baby steps. Yeah. You know, it's baby steps you. It's loving. I love, yes, yes. I love that. Okay, great. Okay. So you said you've had your own personal experiences with it. You've also witnessed countless experiences with it. Are there any messages that come through in every single session? Everything is connected. We are all a part of the same thing. A lot of people define thing in a very different way. So I'm using
Starting point is 00:40:08 that word on purpose. Not because I don't want to be precise with my vocabulary, but because it's a very unique interpretation depending on the person in the situation. And not only we being all of us humans on this floating rock in the middle of space are all connected, but we are connected to the trees. We are connected to anything with a consciousness or an awareness or life. You know, like life itself is so much more than we give it credit for. That's a thing. another theme that comes up is everything comes from love this this happens a lot for people and I think it's a really profound thing like I you know you don't have to be religious you don't mean I've sat with atheists I've sat with Christians I've sat with Buddhist I've sat with
Starting point is 00:40:57 just medicine spiritualists I've sat with a lot of different people and however you define love I think is how all religions and all organized spiritual traditions of all types have been trying to put words around, but it's really hard to put words around the ineffable. And so these experiences give you an experience. Sorry, I'm saying experience so much, of the ineffable. Yeah. And it's inherently impossible to describe. That's what makes it that. So that's the theme of it's awe. It's you experience, I think, a very, very pure form of awe. And I once went to a program because I'm always a student and I love learning. And there was this program that I found called Wonder and Aw, Narrative Science and Contemplation.
Starting point is 00:41:50 So looking at narrative of wonder and awe, science and contemplation with all of these things. And the teacher, the professor, was a professor at Berkeley, still is. And he was saying, I didn't know that plant medicines were going to come up in this. Oh, interesting. I went into it just like it was going to be a normal. course. And he started talking about psychedelics. Wow. And he said that the science that they're discovering is the healing qualities that people experience in the presence of these compounds isn't because of the chemical makeup of the compound. It's actually because awe
Starting point is 00:42:26 is healing to the human nervous system. Oh, wow. Because what it is, it's a full engagement with the present moment. And when you're fully engaged with the present moment, depression doesn't exist. Anxiety doesn't exist. Wow. Fear doesn't exist. And all of these things that plague us are instantly eliminated in the moment of now. Wow. And that is what a lot of these medicines do, especially psilocybin. And then people can take that and bring it into their everyday lives. And that is the key, what you just said. And I think that in the rapid popularization of this, I think that that is being missed, that you don't, you don't have these experiences just for it to exist in a silo. They, they, they are meant to bridge back to our daily life. And how are we practicing
Starting point is 00:43:22 these themes of what if I knew that everything came from love? What if I knew that everything was connected? What if I knew that I can trust myself and I can trust life? What if I knew that letting go is actually the best thing. What if I knew that having control is an illusion and attempting to control things is actually what's hurting me? Right. What if I knew, you know, like all of these things, if you think about what it's like to live life in that way, you're going to have a much better experience. Yeah. No kidding. You're going to have a much happier life in general, I think. And the more happiness and joy and fulfillment you have, the more of a positive impact you're going to have on everyone and everything. I agree. And I think
Starting point is 00:44:02 it's like a ripple effect like because it's all energy right so if you're light and love and you're practicing gratitude and you've got joy like it does touch the people around you and I think then the more people that do it my hypnotherapist actually explain this to me but it's like a ripple effect you know it's like if you were looking at the United States let's say at night and like a light goes on over here and then a light goes on and like all the lights just start turning on I love yes and the other thing too about hypnotherapy is I've had a lot of the same messages as like people get from Lysibin, how everything's connected, everything is about love. And I, so I do think it's interesting that there are different paths you can take to get to the same destination. It's not like you have to
Starting point is 00:44:44 do plant medicine. You know, you can, you can do hypnotherapy or I'm sure there's other things too. But one thing I do love so much about you is that you are not afraid to get in there and face it. I mean, you even went in a cave for a pitch black cave for four days, four days, right? by yourself. And I just think it's so cool that you're not afraid to just get in there. What are some of the other things that you do in your daily life or some of the bigger things that you do to practice this spirituality and you just becoming or staying the best version of yourself?
Starting point is 00:45:21 Yes. I love that you brought this in. And it's like you read my mind because we were talking about light and love and joy and fulfillment and peace. And it's like, okay. And we would be remiss to not mention that. that the way to get there is to face what you think you don't want to see. Oh.
Starting point is 00:45:37 To fully engage with the darkness of the cave, metaphorically or actually, to fully engage with your unfelt grief, to fully engage with what you thought you didn't want your life to include or involve and to see who you have become in the midst of that. And to see that, too, is a necessary part of the journey. Yeah. You know? And so that is part of the answer to that question. It's a willingness to continue to go there because otherwise we're missing half of the completeness of what a human life is. Like we can't, I genuinely believe, and I've found this to be true, not only in my own life, but a lot of people
Starting point is 00:46:20 that I've worked with, you can't have peace and joy without the grief and the pain. Yeah. If you try and numb the pain, you are also equally numb. your capacity for joy. I agree. And that's why these experiences, whether it's a plant medicine journey or hypnotherapy or working with an excellent practitioner that helps you understand yourself, it really is all about a deeper engagement and ability to not judge what you are experiencing and what has
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Starting point is 00:52:17 really dealt with the stuff from my childhood. Even though I thought I was in therapy my whole life and I thought I had dealt with it, it was hypnotherapy that changed everything for me. And hypnotherapy is a journey in itself. My guide, Kristen Eichol, she's actually coming on the podcast too, but she takes you on a journey and she gets you to these places from your childhood and you work through it. I mean, it is like you face it head on. But I wasn't, I thought I thought I was happy and I thought I was all the things. But until I dealt with all of that, I only knew what I knew. I didn't know I could actually be this comfortable in my skin and this happy and content. Yes. Until dealing with it. See, that's what a profound testament to the
Starting point is 00:52:57 validity of what we're saying. Yeah. Is that life can only have, it's like you're painting with three colors. And then you, you know, open the full crayon box that yes, includes some blacks and some blues and some dark greens, but it also has a yellow that you've never used before and all of that. And then you can paint a much more interesting tapestry. Yes, exactly. Do you journal or meditate or you practice gratitude? Like what are the little things that you, well, maybe not a little, but what are the things you do in your daily life to help you? I go in phases with different practices. I have been such a fan of journaling, especially stream of consciousness journaling. I love the artist way. Oh, I don't know this. Oh. I want this. It's great. It's a 12 week. And I didn't do it at
Starting point is 00:53:46 first because my friend who is fully an artist and I consider myself a business person. Right. And she was like, Christine, you have to do this artist way thing. It's like, Allie. No. I'm not the artist. You're the artist. I love that for you. Like that's not. And then somebody that I, it was years later and somebody else mentioned it in one of these like big forums that I was in. And I was like, wait, is that that thing that Allie told me to do? Oh, how funny. And then I did it and it changed my world. And it involves daily journaling.
Starting point is 00:54:16 It's called morning pages. Okay. And you journal stream of consciousness for three pages every single day, no matter what. Wow. Three pages. Three pages. Which I know it sounds like a lot, but probably once you're going, it just comes, right? Sometimes it does.
Starting point is 00:54:29 And sometimes in my artist's way, I've filled an entire page of, this is the stupidest thing I've ever done. Why am I doing this? I don't know what to say. I hate this. You know what I mean? Like, I don't. That's so funny. But what it does is it puts you in relationship with yourself.
Starting point is 00:54:44 Same thing. I've gone in phases of meditation. I love Adam Grant's waking up app. I don't know this either. It's an app and it's great. He has a 21 day intro to meditation. And I found it to be very helpful, especially if you're someone that has had a hard time getting into meditation.
Starting point is 00:55:00 He has a really great objective approach that feels robust and like, okay, I can understand what he's saying. And this isn't too woo-woo. This isn't too fluffy. This isn't too like, just sit and clear your mind. Because actually, that's not the point of meditation. The point of meditation is not to clear your mind. The point of meditation is to come back to your center 10,000 times in five minutes.
Starting point is 00:55:20 Oh. And that is what it is to meditate. I didn't know that. You're training your mind to catch itself when it's wandering, when it's pontificating about something unhelpful, when it's not in the present moment and you bring it back and you bring it back. And that's why meditation is a practice. You're never an expert of meditation. You're always a practitioner.
Starting point is 00:55:41 I've never heard anyone explain it like that. I always, for the longest time, and same thing with hypnotherapy. It changed my meditation practice. But before that, I always thought it was, you want your mind to be blank. No. And I'm like, that's so fucking hard. It's so, it's impossible, actually. Yeah, it's really hard.
Starting point is 00:55:55 It's impossible. And, like, there are people that can access that, like, universal bliss space only from meditation. But it's because they've practiced a hundred thousand trillion reps. Right. of bringing their mind back from wandering to the center. Right. Right. Because I used to get so mad at myself every time my mind would wander.
Starting point is 00:56:14 Yes. And this is why so many people give up on meditation because they're like, I can't do it. I'm bad at it because my mind won't stay clear. Right. No one's mind stays clear. Okay. That makes me feel better. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:24 It's about noticing that your mind isn't clear. Okay. Right. And that's the win. Right. Well, right. Because not the failure. Right.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Right. Right. Right. I also like doing visualization sometimes during meditation. Yeah. Even if it's like a, you know, shimmery golden light coming through your head and through the earth and then back into you or whatever it is. But that's, I think that's an easier way to start anyways because you have a focal point. Yes. For your mind. It is. Yeah. But yeah, meditation is hard. And you, I'm assuming you practice gratitude. Oh, every day. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:54 This is actually, I think, the most relevant practice in my life as it exists today is any time I feel a feeling of fear or anxiety or, oh, no, not again, or whatever that is. I have trained myself to pretty immediately. Sometimes it takes me 30 seconds. Sometimes it takes me 30 minutes. And there are sometimes where it takes me some days. But I've trained myself to ask the question, what if I knew this was medicine? Oh.
Starting point is 00:57:31 What if I knew this was for me? how is this very inconvenient annoying horrible thing yeah fill in the blank how is this helping me become the version of myself that I've dreamed about so even dealing with the most difficult person in my life that person ends up becoming my meditation oh wow that's that's huge can my mind wander can my experience wander into the turbulence of receiving whatever that event is or that word or that email or that text message or that thing. And can I bring myself back to the center of the knowing that this too allows me to be my best self? Why? Because I just got to practice that. Without the turbulence,
Starting point is 00:58:22 I don't get to practice. Without the inconvenient thing, I don't get to remember that I'm very powerful and masterful. We're on cruise control. We atrophy. Yeah. So the goal isn't actually cruise control. The goal is the goal is not letting other people, like, how do I want to say this, not letting other people's words and behavior trigger you, right? Would that be the goal? Well, I mean, let it trigger you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:58:53 So that you use it to become your next best self. Okay. I see. Right. Right. Otherwise then you are, you're not feeling anything. Yeah. Because the trigger, it's almost like the trigger is the mind wandering.
Starting point is 00:59:06 Okay, that's interesting. It can be a necessary, like, that's like the inhale to the get to the exhale. You're right. It's a natural rhythm. Okay. Okay. I like that. I'm going to use that because, yeah, this, I've been like trying to not let other people get to me.
Starting point is 00:59:22 And you're right. It's there for a reason and you can use it to your advantage. Yes. Okay. I love that. Right. Isn't that so much more liberating? Yes, you're right.
Starting point is 00:59:31 Because thinking about like not. letting people get to me and I feel you because I have been through so many rounds of this, as you know, especially in the last few months. And that puts me in a place of like tensed up resistance. I'm not going to let you get to me. I'm not going to let you get to me. And then it's like you're not even human anymore if it's like you can't touch me. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, oh, I see that experience. I feel the impact of that on me. And I see that I'm now better because I got to come back to myself and now I can let it go. Okay. And I won't continue to think about it because I'm not going to give this person the ability to take my peace and joy from this present
Starting point is 01:00:05 moment. Because right now, that person's not here. That's what it is. It's how can you feel it without it allowing to rob you of your joy? Yes. Yeah, that's okay. And seeing the beauty, and maybe not beauty is the wrong word, but seeing the purpose in it is, I think, what allows it to not plague us. Yes. Because we assign a purpose. We're happy about it. We let it go. Okay. I love that. I'm, hmm, I love this. I'm excited to apply this to everything in my life. But I like that too, because everyone at home can take that too. And you can start small if it's something small and then work up to some of the more difficult
Starting point is 01:00:39 things we go through. Yes. Okay, because you are a wealth of knowledge of my favorite person to talk to, I have a fun question for you. Okay. Okay, if someone came to you before they were being reincarnated and said, is there anything I need to know before going to Earth, what would you say? What advice would you give that soul?
Starting point is 01:00:55 Oh my gosh. What a fantastic. Question. Thank you. Of course, my mind immediately goes a hundred directions. I know. I'm sure. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:04 Let me distill. Let me distill. What? Okay, would this be something that they would remember the whole time? Oh, God. That's a good question. Qualifier. Yes.
Starting point is 01:01:18 Okay. So this is, yes, they can take this with them on their earth journey. They can remember this from the beginning. You can trust yourself. Oh. You can trust yourself. meaning like when you have a gut feeling trust it right or like yeah or maybe like you can trust you can rely on yourself you can always count on yourself yes and and anything kind of like
Starting point is 01:01:45 what we've been talking about anything that is happening in your life you can trust that this is part of your evolution okay that to me distilling all of this down comes down to that and and being able to be present with life itself is actually the whole point. The reason I think I struggled with that question, or it made me, you know, freeze up for a moment, is because I have found that the forgetting of those truths is key to then being able to remember. Like we forget in order to remember because the coming into that awareness and that knowledge is exhilarating because we have forgotten. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:35 Agreed. It's the discovery of it. Yeah. And then that becomes why it's all perfect. That's so good. No, it's just so like I say like I feel like I went through a spiritual awakening a few years ago. And that was like, holy shit. Like it all was just like coming at me.
Starting point is 01:02:56 And that was the craziest time in my life. But so cool. And yet, if you came here with that knowledge, you wouldn't have that coming home, coming back to yourself and that feeling in that moment of like, I was actually like really proud of myself for doing it also being like, you did it. Like you came back home. Yes. And I think that's the coolest experience out there.
Starting point is 01:03:17 Exactly. And remembering. Remembering. Yeah. remembering is the coolest experience and we have to face we have to like be in these dense places where we are so not remembering yeah in order to make the remembering make sense yeah like you're I remember that first walk that we went on and I was so I was just like wow she is the real deal because of the way that you were able to speak about that part of your life yeah and all
Starting point is 01:03:46 of the perspective shifts that you underwent and how you like you um owned everything that led into that. And you had this really clear way of relating to yourself in the midst of your life. And I remember getting back in my car and being like, I love her. And it was just this connection that you can only, I know what that is in you because I've experienced it in me. Yeah. And I could hear you, I could hear the layers and the levels of what you were saying beyond the sentences that you were using. Right. Exactly. Because that common language then becomes a connective tissue. Yeah. And that's why I think it's so great if we can all, you know, share our experiences and everyone's, you know, having their own version of what that
Starting point is 01:04:33 looks like for them. And then we're able to relate about it and validate it and like. And normalize it a little bit, you know, because I think for so long, it's like you would go through this stuff and you didn't really have anyone to talk to about it or you would almost, I'd be embarrassed about it. But, like, if someone can't relate, you're like, I'm not even going to go there. But I actually think what's cool is more people can relate than I think we think. Even friends in my own life are also sort of going through the similar spiritual awakening or whatever you want to call it. And I love seeing it because I think there's more people going through it than we want to say.
Starting point is 01:05:06 Yes. Also, I saw all the same things in you. And that's why I loved you immediately too. Okay. I want to talk about alignment because you are someone who is so in sync with what is right for you and what's not. And I think I'm pretty good at it too. But I think that what I've noticed is a lot of people, I think, don't know how to listen to themselves. They don't know how to say no. I think a lot of people are people pleasers. So what is advice for people listening
Starting point is 01:05:35 to how can they know if something is in alignment for them or not? It's just having a conversation about this the other day. And we settled on putting these words around it. does it bring you closer to yourself or farther from yourself? People pleasing, as an example, a lot of times you are putting yourself and your own truth in last place so that you can please the person, believing that that will make you feel good or make you feel safe or make you get the love that you want. But it's taking you farther away from the truest you. you know, we need to please ourselves first. And it's not selfish. Yeah. It's not selfish to prioritize what you know to be true and what feels good. Yeah. You know what feels what feels fulfilling. And this is not like heedonist. You know, I'm not saying like, oh, go just feel good and and screw it. Don't worry. That's not what we're saying. There's a centeredness and a groundedness that, to me, alignment.
Starting point is 01:06:43 feels like. Yeah. And I think there's there's a sensation that happens for me when something is out of alignment. It feels like a tug in a way. You know when your stomach drops? Like on a roller coaster or something. Yeah. When your stomach drops or or when you receive news. Yeah. And it's just like that yeah. Yeah. The pit in your stomach feeling. I will get that when something is out of alignment for me. I'm the exact same. And it's really subtle. Yeah. Yeah. So you so you have that same thing. I do. And I've had to learn. It's been trial and error over the years of just like really tuning in with like I know immediately if I don't want to do something or something's not right for me. But it's I've had to learn how to trust myself over the years. Yes. But we have an example of like let's say I think with
Starting point is 01:07:36 dating. It's kind of a tough question for people sometimes. You have someone in your life where you've seen this where she really liked a guy, but she knew that he wasn't right for her right now. How, like, to me, that is the, you're the strongest human on the planet because I think it'd be really hard for me to really like someone so much, but be like, yeah, I know I see you where you're on your journey and I'm going to allow you to be there. I would be like, but I want to be with you so bad. How can you get to a place where you're that? I don't know what the word is. You're just, you're really moving from your highest self and you know that person is just not right for you in this moment? Like, how do you get to that place to be okay with that? I love this example.
Starting point is 01:08:17 We could riff on this for a long time. As you can imagine, I've spent so much time thinking about this because it does feel, it's almost like the phrase that we've used is it feels like it's going against the grain of the universe for us to not be together in the way that we know is possible. But what I know to be true is if one or both of us has to comprehend. our value systems or our dignity or our sense of self in order to be with the other one, then we're no longer in relationship with the person that we saw in that moment, the person that we're like, yes. Because if you have to contort yourself around your life in order to make the relationship
Starting point is 01:09:07 work, for me right now, that wasn't. the highest and best expression of myself. Wow. I value my alignment and my, what is the right word to use here. So we can say it's you. We can talk about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay. I didn't know if that was okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. You're going through this. Yeah. I'm like, it's amazing to me. Yeah. Because I know that I am devoted to a potential future that includes us trusting. each other to grow in the ways that we need to grow individually, because that's the version of each other that we're going to be able to love long-term and sustainably. I just think that if we compromised any of that along the way, it would be short-term,
Starting point is 01:10:01 like, bliss for long-term potential fallout. Right. But I've thought a lot about this. Like, what is unconditional love? How do I love someone unconditionally without compromising what I know is possible in a relationship? And so it's me choosing what is possible over what I think I want in the moment because that to me is, like, that's the point. Growth and evolution over the course of a lifetime is the point. Being in a relationship, whether you're with the person or decidedly not with.
Starting point is 01:10:39 them, that's still being in relationship and inspiring growth. Because I believe that there are ways that he has grown and will continue to grow because we are not engaging in that way. Yeah. That we will look back and say, thank goodness. We had the foresight, the insight, the devotion. Because I do see it as a form of devotion to what we both know is real. I mean, that's why you're incredible, though. Well, but life is the long game. You know, if you think about it. It's like instead of, because I was so impulsive for so many years and then had to learn
Starting point is 01:11:16 how to just, okay, take a break, sit back, let life play out a little bit. Because everything always does end up working out. Yeah. As much as we want to try to control it all. Exactly. It does. It does work out. What about someone, let's say they're in a job and they're happy, but they don't know.
Starting point is 01:11:33 Like they just, I think a lot of people sometimes like jobs, relationships, even places where they live, like, people are like, I like it and I'm happy, but is this everything for me? Like, how do you know if that's an alignment for you? Let's just use a job, for example. Jobs are interesting because I think that there's a lot of dimensions of how are you benefiting from this situation. Because I do think that there can be, I'm thinking about my first job. It was not the job for me. Yeah. But being in the job that wasn't for me, I learned what I didn't want. Yeah. So are you actively learning about yourself one way or another in the process? Okay. I just, I'm, I'm such a junkie for growth and evolution. So can you point to any version of growth or evolution? If you are only
Starting point is 01:12:27 stagnating, if you are only feeling frustration, like I think that that's an intelligent sign. Like, if you're feeling frustrated daily, there's something you're either not saying, not letting yourself know. not doing that would bring you into alignment. So you have to explore that and listen to it. And here's the key is to have the mastery to not project that frustration on a situation or someone else. Yeah. If there is frustration in your life, there is inner frustration with something that you're not seeing, feeling, knowing, saying, etc. So if you can use that not ideal job, let's just say to access that, then that not ideal job has just become a benefit. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 01:13:12 And then I really do believe that the more that that happens, the more clarity someone naturally has to make a move if that is what is an alignment or to make that, you know, alchemize that not ideal situation into maybe something that they couldn't see before because it was obscured by their own projections. Okay, that's a great tip. And just because you're in a job right now doesn't mean it has to be forever. It could be an alignment right now, to your point. Maybe there's something you need to learn. And then you can move on to something else. Yes. And maybe it takes a week. Maybe it takes a month. Maybe it's a year. But as long as that's the orientation, I really don't think that there's a wrong choice. Okay. I love that. You and I are both in the camp that chaos is actually a good thing. And this is kind of what you've been saying. Yeah. So explain that. Because of the growth. Yeah. Yes. Because chaos. So this is what I wrote my whole book about. I was just and then let's talk about. Yes. book. Yes. Yes. My book, Alchemy of Chaos. And this book is based on the premise that what if we knew
Starting point is 01:14:11 that chaos is a good thing? What if we knew that chaos is an initiator of perspective and creative capacity and development of self that wouldn't be possible without the unexpected, the unconscionable, or the uncontrollable? Those are kind of the three things. And I have found in my life that when I have engaged, with the unexpected, the uncontrollable, or the unconscionable, that ultimately I have nodded to that as a reason that I was able to see something about myself that I couldn't see before, do something that I wouldn't have been motivated to do, you know, to have a conversation that needed to be had, but then this moment of chaos made it an absolute necessity or whatever it is, I think if we can use chaos to our advantage, we're much more powerful because then you're not living a life
Starting point is 01:15:03 trying to like manage chaos not happening to you and instead it's like if it comes when it comes great giddy up like let's go like I know that this is that I can turn this into something really amazing yeah I love that yeah okay when is the book coming out April 7th okay I've preordered it on Amazon you guys all can too okay you are my favorite human on the planet oh my gosh thank you so much for being here of course and then tell everyone where they can find you and obviously where they can order your book, too. Yes, I mean, wildly. Simon & Schuster is doing the distribution for the book.
Starting point is 01:15:38 So it's available everywhere. I think Target and Barnes & Noble. Oh, my God. And it's on Amazon right now. You can pre-order it. Yeah, you can pre-order it everywhere. And I'm working on becoming a person who posts on social media. It's been a few years.
Starting point is 01:15:54 Oops. No, it's so good that you don't. So they can't find you anywhere. They can find me, but it looks like a dormant profile. I promise I will be posting much, much more because it was so funny. My publisher was looking at my non-existent social media presence. And because I've built so much of my career in stealth mode. Like it hasn't really been a part of my success.
Starting point is 01:16:17 Bad ass, by the way, that you haven't needed social media. Well, it's a blessing. It occurs because now at this point of my life where I've done this thing, I've written this great book. I really love this book that I wrote. And I think it's going to be really helpful for a lot of people. but there's no real channels for anyone to know that I did it. And so my publisher was like, Christine, you're going to just have to get your mind around posting on social media because you've put five years of your life into this.
Starting point is 01:16:44 Don't you want to let people know it exists? It's okay to talk about the thing you did. I know. You know. So I'm working on it. Okay. Well, so you'll be posting soon. Yes.
Starting point is 01:16:54 I'll be posting before. In fact, I'm going to post in honor of this. Yes. It'll be my first post since 2022. I think. That is wild. That's, I think that's a good thing. So all you guys need to go and like it.
Starting point is 01:17:06 So is it just your name? You're Christine Thompson? Yes. Your Instagram. Okay. And then do you have a website. What have people? I do have a website.
Starting point is 01:17:13 It's under my old brand right now, but it's going to be moved to my new company name, which I named after my kids. Love. And it's going to be called Atlas of Orion. Cute. Can you believe I got the dot com? That's actually amazing. I know.
Starting point is 01:17:27 How cute are her kids names, you guys? Yeah. I love them so much. So sweet. Yes. So it'll be, it'll be Atlas of Orion.com. Okay, we love. Very soon. Amazing. So this comes out in like two weeks, so you need to get going. Okay. Perfect. Thank you for the deadline. Thank you. I love you so much. Thank you for having me. may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

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