Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - The Hills: Strike One (Season 5, Episode 13)

Starting point is 00:00:00 The following podcast is a dear media production. This is Let's Be Honest with Kristen Cavalry, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality TV, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing. Welcome in. How is everybody? We are back for yet a new. Another Hill's rewatch episode. Okay, today the episode is titled Strike One. All right, we're just going to jump right in, guys. So, this episode is Brody's birthday.

Starting point is 00:00:45 Brody is turning 26. My God, 26. Oh, my God. It's crazy how fast time goes. So we open up the episode with Stacy and I going to the hustler store. Thanks, MTV. You guys really always put me in a great light. So the hustler store, if you're not familiar, is basically a sex shop. It has all the sex toys imaginable. It has lingerie. I mean, it has everything sex imaginable. And so, you know, not going to lie, guys, I did not frequent

Starting point is 00:01:21 the hustler store. I don't know that I ever went in there. I think maybe the only time we would go in there was for Halloween costumes. And so this really was. This really was. my first time browsing. But like, fuck you guys MTV. But also, I don't know, I guess fuck myself for not being like, hey, can we go to any store but the hustler store? I don't know. Like, oh, you guys want me to get Brody a birthday present at the hustler store when he's in a relationship with Jade? What the hell, you guys? But okay, I'll go. I would never do that. I would never do that. But again, I mean, listen, like we're playing this up. So we get him a call. collar and a whip. And I say, because he's so whipped on Jade. And, oh, my God. I mean,

Starting point is 00:02:06 I can't even believe the conversations that I'm having on camera. So Stacey and I are talking about Brody and I and our sex life. And I say that Brody and I never used any of this stuff. So Stacey asks specifically about our sex life. And I say that it was very vanilla, if you will. Oh my God. I have not. no words, honestly. Like, what? What? I remember? Brody did not like that comment. Brody did not like that. That did not sit well with him. And understandably so. I mean, I'm sorry Brody that I said that on camera. He wasn't mad at me or anything, but he definitely, he mentioned it. He mentioned it. So, yeah. So Stacy asks who I'm going to go to Brody's party with, which was a wild line. And I say

Starting point is 00:02:57 that I'm going to go with Justin. Also a wild line. By the way, it is a surprise party for Brody that Jade is throwing. And so, yes, they're setting it up, trying to make it seem like Justin and I are going to go to the party together, which this was never even on the table, which is also why they had to get it later in wild lines. And so, and we've talked about this, but I think what happens sometimes is like the party, for example, like Justin never comes to the, the party, right? So then in post or later, they're like, okay, hmm, how can we give it more stakes, right? Like, give the party some more drama, like amp up the storyline between the two of us, Justin and I. And so then they're like, oh, we should make it seem like Kristen and Justin,

Starting point is 00:03:47 we're going to go together. And then he flaked on her. Great idea. That's a great storyline. Okay. So now we're at my, my Malibu House. I didn't. not remember this scene. It's with Justin and I, and he's surfing, and we're just hanging out at the beach. We have some wine. It's the middle of the day, not a care in the world. And he and I are just sitting outside in the sun on the beach. And we're talking about tattoos. You know, Justin's all tatted up. At the time, I had two tattoos. I had a star on my foot and the capricorn symbol on the back of my neck. And I tell him, I want to get two more stars on my foot. I remember that was always my plan. I started with one star on my foot and I always thought I would

Starting point is 00:04:30 go back and get two more, which I don't know why I didn't just get three at the same time. I never got those other two stars, but that was my plan for years, which actually would have worked because the Tennessee flag has three stars. So it, look at that. Just life imitating art, guys. Maybe Justin would be proud of my tattoos now because I have 10 now. Okay, so I am telling Justin we should go to Brody's party together. Also a wild line. And I say that Jade is throwing it. But isn't it funny because if Jade hated me like they've made it seem this whole time, right? Like they love to get any sort of little clip of Jade saying, I can't stand her or whatever, which who knows who she's talking about? They obviously make it seem like she's talking about me. But if Jade hated me so much,

Starting point is 00:05:16 why would she invite me to Brody's party? Right? Like it just none of it really adds up. And again, Jade and I never hated each other. Jade and I actually really liked each other. Then we cut to a scene of Adrina and Stephanie, and they're getting their nails done. And Adrina, you know, they're saying that she needs to come out again, you know. She needs to be having fun again. Like she's basically been sitting at home by herself, you know, since I came on the scene. And Adrina is talking about this guy, Derek, who Stephanie says, isn't that Justin Bobby's best friend? And Adrina is like, well, he's technically both of our friends.

Starting point is 00:05:52 and so Adrina is going to go on a lunch date with him and she's saying how Justin used to get mad because he always felt like something was going on between Derek and Adrina and Stephanie is like, well, you know, did something happen between you guys? And she tells Stephanie that she's kissed him

Starting point is 00:06:11 or she implied that because, you know, I guess Justin always used to think that like they hooked up. And so Adrina was like, we didn't like hook up, hook up like that. Which to me makes it seem like they kissed or something. but didn't have sex. I don't know. That's just what I picked up on. And Stephanie does say that it kind of sounds like Adriena is going to go on this lunch date with Derek out of revenge. And I don't know. My guess is that was probably a little MTV's doing as well. I don't think Audreyna just like pulled that out of her ass and was like, hey, I'm going to go on a date with Justin's best friend.

Starting point is 00:06:40 My guess is MTV caught wind of that. And they really pushed for that. So then we're at Brody's birthday party. And Brody's mom, Linda, is there. Shout out Linda. I do love Linda so very much. It was so good to see her. And because, you know, you guys, you have to remember, I really did date Brody when I was 18. So four years prior to this, he was my first boyfriend in L.A. I basically lived with him and his mom for a stint. And so I got really close with Linda, with his mom. And I, Linda's always just been nothing but sweet. She is so warm and welcoming and just, she's just an awesome, awesome woman. And they show that. You know, I mean, I think they really show that that Linda and I obviously have a relationship. You can tell we've known each other for a while.

Starting point is 00:07:25 And isn't it funny? Because now magically at this birthday party, Jade and I are cool with each other. You know, we're getting along. Even though I think last episode, she was saying how much she can't stand me. But see, I think when you know the real story, the backstory, it's actually, you can kind of actually pick it up pretty easily and tell. So there's a whole stink about, where's Justin? Where's Justin Bobby? Are you dating? Oh my God. where is he? Like, oh la la. And I'm like,

Starting point is 00:07:54 I don't know. So Brody really was surprised. And I definitely think that was real. This is where MTV really did come through in situations like this where you did want to pull off a surprise because they helped it. I mean, obviously, like they were with Brody before, I'm sure, which got cut out.

Starting point is 00:08:12 But I'm sure they had cameras with Brody and his guy friends before. And so that in itself is a distraction. And then Brody is on their time. and they can stop him if the party's not ready. Like, it's just, it's so perfectly orchestrated when you have MTV around to help pull off a surprise party. So Brody is very much surprised, which is awesome. Then you have Lowe, Stephanie and I sitting together the three of us, which as a viewer,

Starting point is 00:08:39 I don't know. I didn't know that we all were cool with each other. I thought these girls absolutely fucking despised me. And now the three of us are, like, sitting here having a little powwow. my guess is that was MTV led or it's one of two things it could have been MTV saying hey can we get the three of you sitting down talking together sure I could see that happening or it could have been really the three of us just naturally kind of sitting down together and then the conversation was MTV led I don't know I don't remember but they asked me if I'm dating Justin I say yes what what that was

Starting point is 00:09:11 not no that was spliced together there's no world in which I will would have said I was dating Justin. There's just no world. I don't think because I wasn't. And I say he's coming, I think. And, you know, they make it seem like I'm worried and kind of upset about where he is. None of that. None of that was true. Then there's a water balloon fight, you guys. And what do you know? I get decked in the fucking face. Oh my God. How lucky are they? that they got this on camera. I got hit right in the face. And I remember it hurt because I got hit really hard with a water balloon, but it like smashed my sunglasses into my face. I was so pissed, you guys. And I say that I'm actually just really upset because half of my hair is going to get curly

Starting point is 00:10:06 because half of my hair got wet and my hair is naturally pretty wavy. And that's always my biggest thing. Like, if I get my hair wet and I know it has to air dry, I'm like my hair's going to be, it's not cute. It's curls, but like not cute curls. And it's just, I never want to let my hair dry. So, and I'm filming right. I'm on camera. So I'm pissed. But anyways, there's more with Linda and I and she is saying, any man is lucky to be my man. And she's just, she's been really sweet to me because they're asking me where Justin is. Blah, blah, blah. But Linda's like really having my back and being really sweet. And they make it seem like there's this awkward scene with Brody and Jade and the sex toys that I quote unquote gave him.

Starting point is 00:10:47 Like I never in a million years would have given Brody's sex toys like ever, ever, ever if it wasn't for MTV. And they make it seem like Jade is really pissed. And I don't remember her being pissed, especially about the sex toys. I feel like I would maybe remember that unless maybe she really was mad because of the combination of all the things, which they're showing, which is Linda really being very very sweet to me and like we're having this moment and this bond between the sex toys and then you know how we're all going to go back to my my Malibu house for an after party and jade doesn't

Starting point is 00:11:24 want to go but brodie's going and brodie actually says you're really going to be a bitch like that and i was like oh god that is not a good thing to say to your girlfriend oh god i don't know and jade does not come to the after party. So I have a feeling there was some truth to this because otherwise Jade would have come. I mean, I, so yeah, my guess is maybe she was kind of mad. And the conversation that Brody and I have at my house later feels really genuine to me, which is hair will cut to it. This is like way late. This is like towards the end of the episode. But okay, so Jade doesn't come and Brody saying that, you know, he didn't want to fight. And he actually says love is a horrible thing when it goes wrong. Let's take a minute to talk about Element. You guys know I love

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Starting point is 00:17:23 And, you know, he says this is the kind of thing that ends a relationship. And you can tell, tell, I genuinely feel bad. They really did obviously have a fight. And, you know, listen, I like this little moment with Brody and I because that is actually me. Like, that is a glimpse of who I really am. Nothing that I did, like the sex toys and anything. Like, I never would have done that on my own or intentionally to piss off J. That's just not who I am as a person. And so this glimpse of me being like, wait, is she seriously mad because of me is like, I'm genuinely being like, holy shit. because I, that wasn't my intention. And obviously, listen, there is probably a piece of this where

Starting point is 00:18:07 I maybe took it too far sometimes with the filming stuff. And, you know, I probably could have had more empathy for Jade and Brody because they were in a real relationship, kind of like when Steven and I were in a real relationship. And maybe that is something that I should have been like, hey, I'm not going to give Brody sex toys. Like, this is so dumb. But in my head, I'm just like, cool, I'm a team player now. Like, I'm going to do whatever you guys want. And I was like that because it was the opposite on Laguna Beach. And that was a really, really tough situation for me. So I thought the only way for me to enjoy the hills was to be gay and be up to do whatever.

Starting point is 00:18:42 And maybe there's a world in which it was too far for some people. And if that's the case, I do feel really bad about it. I really don't remember Jay being mad about the sex toys though. But maybe, you know, to me, she wasn't. But maybe, you know, behind closed doors she actually was, which is totally understandable. So I do kind of feel bad if that were the case. Another thing Brody said to Jade when she's walking away and he's going, we don't care, leave, we don't care.

Starting point is 00:19:08 That could have been a wild line. I can't imagine he was saying that to her because Brody wasn't mean. And so I, I don't know, I just, I really can't see that. I think that, I don't know, I think it was a different time. I also think it's different when you're 22, well, he was turning 26. I just can't really see Brody saying that to his girlfriend, though, if I'm being completely honest. All right. So then we have Derek picking up Adrina for this lunch date.

Starting point is 00:19:37 And, oh, God, any date on camera, you guys, was so awkward when it was the first or second date. Or, like, you know, anyone knew that you didn't know that well. It was so awkward. So I just felt for both Derek and Adrina in this scene. And I thought Derek was cute. I was like, go, Adrina. He says he did not tell Justin that they were going to lunch. And you know what I was thinking?

Starting point is 00:20:01 That was all they showed of the date. I wasn't picking her up in the car ride. They didn't actually show any of the date, you guys. So I'm assuming it didn't go very well or I'm assuming it was just kind of boring. I don't know because otherwise why wouldn't they show any of it? They only showed going in the car for like one minute, not even. So I don't know. I don't know how that date went.

Starting point is 00:20:26 But he was cute. And then they have, okay, Spencer and Charlie hitting golf balls at their new house. And, you know, their house is so incredible and has these views and this land that they're able to just hit golf balls off of their property, which is so great. And they're talking about married life, the house. And Spencer is saying he never would have gotten married if he knew it was going to be, you know, all about kid time. And they're having this conversation.

Starting point is 00:20:55 And what do you know? In the midst of this conversation, Enzo comes over unannounced, uninvited, and unannounced. And they ask him how he got in. He says he knows the code. I mean, it's just also perfect, you guys. Perfect for TV. Enzo really is so cute, though. And just such a great character. I mean, I feel like he was born to be on TV. I'm so curious where Enzo is now, by the way. I should look that up. So Spencer tells Enzo, we're going to play Hide and seek. He wants him to count to 2000. And Enzo's like, it seems like a lot. He's like, Yeah, just go. The kid drama is really just, I think it's, again, just the comedic relief that we need to then cut back to the beach house party. So we're at my house, this beach house. And I'm sitting there with Stephanie, like we're best friends. So what do you know? And so I tell Stephanie that we only kissed once. It's not like we're hooking up. Because again, you guys, we didn't hook up. We never hooked up. I only kissed him once on camera for the show. And I think that's what I'm kind of trying to. to imply to Stephanie. It's so wild to me to see how drunk I would get on camera. Like I really didn't hold back. I had no problem drinking on camera and being wild. And it's, I just would never do that today. I mean, obviously, huge difference from age 22 to 38. But I really just put it all out there. You know, I was just living my best life. So there's a wild line from Stacey. and she says she can't believe Justin Bobby didn't show up. And I am saying I never actually care about guys.

Starting point is 00:22:32 I never go out of my way. I don't think about guys at night. But that I thought about him. Didn't think I would actually have feelings for him and get upset. And this is interesting because, well, there's kind of a lot to unpack here. So my persona back in the day, was definitely, I don't care about guys. I don't need guys. You know, like no guy keeps me up at night sort of a thing, which is basically what I'm saying. And while, yes, that was true, it's not like I was

Starting point is 00:23:06 a complete stone cold killer, right? Like, I had feelings and I had relationships and I always really liked my boyfriends and, you know, but that was a protection mechanism that I had back in the day is to be like, I don't care. I don't care. When I'm sure I did. But I also am not convinced that I'm talking about Justin Bobby here, if I'm being completely honest. I could have been talking about someone entirely different, you guys. Or I could have been playing it up for the camera. That's probably what it was because I had no problem doing that. And you know, it's so funny is after this, watching this episode, I started remembering some other episodes and there was closer to the end of the second season, so like close to the finale,

Starting point is 00:23:54 there was a scene with Brody and I. And was I saying goodbye to Brody or I can't remember, but Brody and I filmed at a restaurant in Santa Monica and they asked me if I could cry. And I was like, I'll try. I don't know, but we're going to find out I'll try. And I did. And I remember being really proud of myself. I was like, go out. But my point with that is, a lot of this stuff was acting. Like, it really was. And I actually found, if I had a couple drinks in me, I sometimes was better. So that's why, or maybe I shouldn't say acting. Maybe I should say improv. Because while this sentiment is very much who I was at age 22. The feelings towards Justin and me being upset is not true. But I was able to tap into

Starting point is 00:24:51 like how I would feel had I liked someone or I was able to, you know, come up with this to to be like, you know, this is so out of character for me basically. Like, but God, I really did have feelings for him. Even though, again, like, it's not true. But like, that was easy for me to do, to have this type of a conversation on camera and to play it up and to improv slash act, this is what made it fun for me. Like, this is why I really enjoyed filming the hills. And by the way, I had five years of acting experience in between Laguna Beach and the hills.

Starting point is 00:25:28 And so it just, it was fun. It was really fun. So then Brody comes in and we say, if there isn't a Justin Bobby, there's a Brody. And so that's when Brody and I have that. conversation. And I just remember, you know, the very few times that we got to be at that Malibu House, we really had a lot of fun. Because my guess is we filmed for a little bit longer. And then, you know, the thing with filming is they have to be done at a certain time. You know, there's only so many hours in the day that they can film. And so I'm sure they had a hard out.

Starting point is 00:26:03 And we got to stay and hang. And those were always really fun, really fun nights. Then Heidi and Spencer are at dinner. Spencer, comedic relief, I'm telling you guys, he is wearing a cowboy hat. And I guess it's a beaver skin hat, they say. I mean, they just, these two absolutely kill me. And so Heidi is, you know, immediately going into what should we get first? A cat, a dog, et cetera, et cetera. And Spencer's like, oh, wow, you know, no baby on that list. Like, wow. And you guys, they're 23 years old. Or sorry. Heidi is 23 years old. I think Spencer and Brody are the same age. So Spencer, I think is 26. But 23 is young to be talking about babies. I mean, wow. I don't know. When I heard them say that Heidi was 23, I was like, whoa. And she's like really, you know, going all out here on the babies. Which again, I know is like her storyline. I also do know Heidi always did want to be a mom. I don't think that was like completely out of left field. But and obviously, I mean, she's, you know, their parents now. And they're really happy. And Spencer. loves being a dad. But I just was like, damn, 23. And to be like really talking about kids is wild.

Starting point is 00:27:17 Although, I don't know. I wasn't that far off. I got pregnant at age 24. So, but it just was not on my mind at that age at all. And then Spencer asked Heidi if it's a marriage or a dictatorship. I just, I love these too. Spencer says, I never want to have kids. And Heidi's like, yes, you do. You just don't know it yet. Which isn't it so funny now knowing how things turned out with the two of them that this was their storyline and it's just, it's so funny. But you know what is actually even funnier is Heidi would have a thousand kids today. Like I, maybe the last time I talked to Heidi about this was, I don't know, four-ish years ago, four or three. We got dinner in LA one night and I remember talking about this, but she would have more kids. I think Spencer's kind of the one that is still like

Starting point is 00:28:04 pumping the brakes on it, which is, you know, so I think there was maybe a seed of truth here. let's chat about cook unity the holidays are here which means it's time for comfort joy and really good food i every christmas eve or christmas depending i always make homemade meatballs and sauce and pasta and it is so so good and now you guys can impress your relatives yes even the judgy ones with gourmet holiday meals from cook unity let their chefs take holiday meal prep off your plate with festive yet nutritious dishes. I've talked to you guys about how I love delivery food when I'm traveling a lot if I'm in a time crunch and honestly just with all of my kids' schedules right now, we have been

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Starting point is 00:33:15 the Adrina's lunch date. She says, Derek opened the door for her. Like, it's a big deal. Isn't that crazy, you guys, that that's where the bar is when you're age 22. Like, if you're in your early 20s and you're listening to this, only go out with guys who open your door. Like, what? Where are the manners with these guys? Where are the parents with these guys? Where are the parents raising these boys. I promise you guys, I am raising my boys to be little gentlemen. And if my boys do open your door for you, then kick him to the curb. But she says the date went well. There was no drama. I mean, clearly, because we didn't see any of it, I think it was probably just pretty blah. But yeah. So Stephanie tells Audrina that Justin stood me up. He stood me up. And that I kept

Starting point is 00:33:57 texting him going, where are you? I would never do anything quite like that. Like, ever, ever, ever. Adrina says it's karma and that it's kind of funny. They're having a little shit talking sush, which, fine, I get it. Fine, fine, fine. Even though I didn't give a shit about, which, okay, I want to know, I should text Audrina. I want to know if this whole time, like, Adrina thought that really happened.

Starting point is 00:34:22 Like, did Adriena really think that I was upset that Justin wasn't at that party? I'm curious about that. I'm really curious about that, actually. I'm going to get some answers for you. guys on some of these things. I'm going to follow up with you. But isn't it fucked up of MTV to make it seem like Justin and I had this incredible time on his motorcycle, this great date, where I'm rooting for us to be together, watching it back. I'm smiling and like, yes, oh my God, yes, yes, yes. And then the next episode, they make it seem

Starting point is 00:34:53 like he totally just fucking ditched my ass. Rude. God, that's so rude. I don't like that. Okay, so this scene, the next, the morning after the Malibu party, you guys, oh my God, this scene is so fucking funny to me. So they make it seem like a wake up scene, which I'm sure it was the morning. It was not, they did not wake up with us. Like, we always knew a time they were coming. We girls always got up before to be like, take a look in the mirror to be like, okay, I don't look 100% haggard. I only look 90% haggard. Perfect. And so like that just, cameras never woke me up. It wasn't like that. But okay, they make it seem like it's the morning. So Stacey is downstairs. I'm upstairs in the bedroom. And they have Stacey sitting there with just like glasses and

Starting point is 00:35:42 drinks and stuff everywhere. And she is a red martini that she is like, she's like shaking and looking so hungover. And she's drinking this red martini. And as she's doing that, I'm walking downstairs, you know, from the bedroom upstairs. And oh my God, we're talking about how hungover we are and oh my god and we just start talking about the night before you know and i'm saying that jay didn't like that i'm close with brodie's mom linda and that well it's funny because they're really starting now to lay the groundwork for brodie and i so stacey says that brodie and i should date you guys are perfect and i'm like i love him but you know we broke up for a reason And then, you know, like, but what's, like, what are we doing?

Starting point is 00:36:31 We are setting it up for Brody and I to have a little stint. And then I say that Adrina put up with a lot of Justin's stuff and that I'm, shouldn't say stuff. Like, now I want to censor myself. Adrina put up with a lot of Justin's shit. And I say, I'm not going to put up with it. I don't have time for it. It's just not me. Strike one.

Starting point is 00:36:52 That's where the title of the episode came from. Strike one, boo. So that is the. episode and I don't remember you guys the storyline with Justin and I and how this ends and what happens. Like I actually have no idea. So I'm excited to see because I just, I have no idea what to expect like none. I don't think we really filmed that much more together. So I don't know. I think I'll be able to give you guys some more insight on this whole episode and him like not coming to the party based on what happens in the future because I just am drawing a complete blank.

Starting point is 00:37:31 But you want to know what these shows really got right, you know, with Laguna Beach and the hills and I'm assuming the city. I actually never saw the city either. But these shows were so good because as a viewer, you are picking a side. There's no gray area. You're not like, oh, I like Adrina and Kristen. Like, I really hope the girls can work it out. No. You are like, fuck Cardrina, you know, or for whatever reason, or you're like, I fucking hate Kristen. Who does she think she is? This new girl coming in. She is a boyfriend stealer. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. You are picking a side. You are rooting for someone. And so when you root for someone like that, you have to keep tuning in to see what happens. You're like, I, I need, and by the way, I need to

Starting point is 00:38:15 know what happens with me and Justin. Like, I'm invested in this. Like, what? Because I have no idea. So they really, they knew what they were doing and they fucking killed it. I mean, and again, before this was like, these shows were like the first, you know. And then of course, everyone started doing them after Jersey Shore. Well, Jersey Shore was different. That felt very real to me. But or as, you know, kind of as real as you could make a reality show because they had cameras on them 24-7. But like Vanderpump rules and some of these other shows, you know, followed suit years later.

Starting point is 00:38:47 And there's a real formula here. that works because, man, do you pick a side and you, I don't know, I just think it's smart as far as the TV show goes. So, anyways, that's that episode. And I can't wait to see what comes. So I will see you guys for the next one. And in the meantime, happy Hills watching. I'm, so I'm watching them as we go, you guys, because I don't want to get too ahead. And so I mean, I really like, I have, I'm like any other viewer. I have no idea what's to come. Much makes it really fun.

Starting point is 00:39:22 So anyway. All right. I'll see you guys in. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari - The Hills: Strike One (Season 5, Episode 13)

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