Let's Go To Court! - 80: A Swig of Mountain Dew & the Phony Pony Bandit

Episode Date: July 31, 2019

Ronald Ball was thirsty. So he walked over to the vending machine, got himself a Mountain Dew and cracked it open. He took a swig. Right away, he became violently ill. As soon as he recovered, he turned his attention to the Mountain Dew. What the hell was wrong with it? As he poured the rest of the soda into a cup, a dead mouse plopped out. When Ronald Ball threatened Pepsico with a lawsuit, the company relied on a defense that shocked the world… and probably had their PR team looking for new jobs.  Then, Brandi tells us about a string of bank robberies that occurred in the summer of 2012. Over time, law enforcement came to refer to the mysterious bank robber as the “Phony Pony Bandit,” because the robber wore a cheap wig, pulled back in a ponytail. The Phony Pony Bandit went on quite a spree, but it came to an end on September 25, when a sheriff’s deputy caught him in the act. And now for a note about our process. For each episode, Kristin reads a bunch of articles, then spits them back out in her very limited vocabulary. Brandi copies and pastes from the best sources on the web. And sometimes Wikipedia. (No shade, Wikipedia. We love you.) We owe a huge debt of gratitude to the real experts who covered these cases. In this episode, Kristin pulled from: “Swig of Mountain Dew included dead mouse, suit claims,” by Kelly Holleran for the Madison-St. Clair Record “A brief history of rodents in soda containers,” by Arielle Duhaime-Ross for The Verge “Pepsi says Mountain Dew can dissolve mouse carcasses,” by Eric Randall for The Wire. “Mouse and Mountain Dew Experiment” on YouTube  In this episode, Brandi pulled from: “Bank robbery suspect shot in Stanwood” by Diana Hefley and Rikki King, The Everett Herald “‘Phony Pony Bandit’ admits to armed robberies” by Diana Hefley, The Everett Herald “‘Phony Pony Bandit’ gets 17-year sentence for robberies” by Diana Hefley, The Everett Herald “Bank robber shot in Stanwood drops lawsuit against SnoCo” by Jeremiah O’Hagan, Skagit Valley Herald

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A proud member of Wayne's Auto Group. One semester of law school. One semester of criminal justice. Two experts. I'm Kristen Caruso. I'm Brandi Egan. Let's go to court. On this episode, I'll talk about a can of Mountain Dew.

And I'll be talking about the phony pony bandit. Phony pony bandit. Very good. Also, the phony pony bandit. Okay, listen. Sing-a-thon. Okay, you guys, like two seconds ago, I tried to say sing-a-thon. But she said sing-a-thon. Okay, you guys, like two seconds ago, I tried to say sing-a-thon. But she said sing-a-thon.

Which is much sexier. And I think we can all agree more fun. I got all hot and bothered. Okay, you just ruined my case. Okay, but here, and you were like. Don't ruin it for the listeners. Okay, sorry. And you were like, how do you know this? And then I explained how my brain works to you.

It's a sponge. I hear stuff. I don't even realize I've heard it. It just gets lodged up in there. The problem is that I'm really smart. No, there's so much useless knowledge just taking up real estate in this brain. This is a long way of saying that Brandy knows this case already. And I don't know how. How do you know?

I don't know. Based off one can of Mountain Dew, you know this case. I knew what it was. Okay. Please raise your hand at this time if you also know what it is based off of a can of Mountain Dew. One, two, three.

I'm counting the audience, Kristen. Yeah, I can tell. I can tell what's what's happening. Okay, let's jump in. Yes, please. Okay. First of all, let's just say off the top. What?

That nobody is being murdered on this week's episode. Yeah. It's like we couldn't take it. We could not take it. We could not take it. You ruined it. I did. You ruined murder for it. We could not take it. You ruined it. I did. You ruined murder for us.

I 100% did. I'm sure that I will return to the murder at some point. Yeah, probably next week. Probably. But this last case did me in. Yeah, that was horrible. I know. So David, I talked to him earlier today on my way over here.

And he was like, hey, your case was terrible. And I was like, yeah, I know. know and he's like you did it really good but he's like i could tell that it was like affecting you and i was like yeah and he's like there was just like time to you just had to like pause before you said something and i was like yeah because it was a fucking terrible yeah that that whole thing was just awful awful awful case so weful case. So we're moving past it. We're doing ones where no one gets murdered. No murders this week. Also.

This is a murder-free episode. Maybe you're thinking to yourself, this once-a-week business with Let's Go to Court, I can't handle it. I need more. Well, that's totally understandable. Our moms can relate. We are on Patreon.

Go to www.patreon.com backslash LGTC podcast. And you can join us at the district, appellate, or Supreme Court levels. Supreme Court! Okay, well, that was late. Also, I didn't signal you. You didn't. Yeah, I didn't do anything. And you didn't even say it like we say it.

You said Supreme Court levels. Should I be't do anything. You gave no, and you didn't even say it like we say it. You said Supreme Court levels. Should I be fired? Yes. You are fired immediately. Effective immediately. I will now hire you back at a lower pay rate. Thank you very much. If you join at the district court, that's $2 per month, and you get to vote on episode

topics and get case updates. Although, Brandi, have you done any yet? I have not because we know you're not doing it, so I need to get on that. My goodness. My goodness is right. Appellate and Supreme Court levels get the bonus episodes which are monthly. Monthly

bonus episodes! And Supreme Court level members get their name at the end of the podcast. They get inducted. Inducted into the Supreme Court. And the induction is very official and very real. That's right.

You get a badge. Yep. No, you don't get a badge. You don't get a badge, but you get a sticker. You get a sticker, yeah. Yeah, and a thank you card. Which you can wear on a jean jacket like a badge. Or you could put it on a button.

You know, like get yourself a big button. You know, like a button. Yeah, I think we're all familiar with buttons. Not like a button, though. Like a button. The English language is very difficult. How do you distinguish without being able to show someone the difference between a button and a button it's funny so brandy's you're reaching you're

pointing to a button like it's in the middle of your shirt i totally get it and then button like it's on my lapel yeah yeah huh you guys know what we're talking about i don't think they do anyway join us on patreon is what we're saying right that's exactly what we're saying i'm sorry i'm so bad at this you know what i tried i tried to do it i know you always make me do that shit i love it and then you're like don't worry i've got it i've heard you say it eight million times surely i I can handle it. You know what? I've got a lot of other skills, okay? You do. You've got a particular set of skills.

I will find you and I will kill you. Did I lapse into Liam Neeson there? You really shortened his speech and made it a lot less intense. I don't appreciate it. Because he did find those men. He did. And he killed them. And he saved his daughter.

That's the most lighthearted sex trafficking movie of all time. Wow. Lighthearted sex trafficking. Well, listen to me. Because you know from the get-go, Liam Neeson is going to catch these guys. You're right. You're right. It is so good, though.

Well, I don't know about so good. I love Taken. Well, yeah, so do I. But I don't know about so good. It's so good. Okay, here's how I know it's so good. I'm not a big action movie fan, and I watched that movie on the edge of my seat with my mouth half open. Liam Neeson's just giving it to bad guys left and right.

That sounds like a porno. Which you would also watch with your mouth half open. Up the ass. All right. All right. All right. This podcast is officially disgusting. I'm sorry. Good grief.

Speaking of disgusting, here's my case. Excellent. Tell us about a Mountain Dew can that I know nothing about. It was November 10th, 2008, Brandy. And Ronald Ball was... Eight days after Kristen's birthday. You and birthdays. Love birthdays!

Was working at Marathon Oil in Wood River, Illinois. And Ronald was thirsty. So he walked over to the vending machine, got himself a Mountain Dew, he opened the can, took a swig, and immediately became violently ill. Just like vomit, vomit, vomit. When he recovered, he was like, holy hell, what was wrong with that can of Mountain Dew? So he went over to it, grabbed a styrofoam cup, poured the rest of the can into the cup,

and as he poured, the toxic green liquid came out, and along with it came a dead mouse yep it plopped out of the can and into the cup i had to say plopped oh ronald was disgusted and he noticed a phone number on the side of the can and he wasted no time he called the number and made a formal complaint and they were like whoa we need to call you back uh-huh yeah i'm gonna have to get a supervisor on this one pretty soon ronald got a call from someone who was investigating his claim and the investigator said hey this is a pretty big accusation could you send us the evidence what what how did he send it to them I would have sent pictures I'm keeping that evidence

for myself right they can't destroy it. How much of this case do you remember? Nothing. I remember that there was a mouse in the can. Okay, okay, good. So Ronald also later said that the guy or woman, I don't know. Maybe it was a robot. Ronald later said that the robots accused him of lying.

So Ronald said, sure, I'll send you the evidence. He grabbed a mason jar, poured the dead mouse and the leftover Mountain Dew. I'm sorry, I'm being Mr. Rogers over here. I'm trying to get into a zip-up hoodie right now. Are you cold? Yes. Oh. I have this nice sweatshirt on over here.

Well, congratulations on not being cold. Appropriately dressed for the conditions. What's the temperature outside? It is actually a little warm for a sweatshirt. Yeah, I was going to say. But you'll notice that until this moment, I had the sleeves pushed up. Uh-huh. Which practically makes it a tank top.

You are showing quite a bit of skin. Yeah, it is right. For my taste. I am. Young lady. Now you got him down to the wrist. That's right. So I like it. So he sends... I know what you're thinking, folks. You're wondering if this is an After Dark episode. It's not. It's not.

We're recording at normal time. Why do you think we have an after dark vibe right now i don't know is it because we ate drumsticks yeah yeah we had some sugar we had sugar we just didn't have chicken we did not eat chicken drumsticks drumsticks i'm gonna hit that again we did however eat those delicious ice cream cone treats also known as drumsticks so i was at the grocery store the other day i couldn't resist norman loves drumsticks brandy loves drumsticks and they had like the ice cream sundae flavor so you get the strawberry you get banana flavor you get yeah i couldn't it was delicious thank you thank you i made them myself so he shipped off this mouse i'm concerned for ronald i'm concerned why what do you think is going to happen i think they're going to destroy

the evidence and call him a liar okay so i'm not sure at what point he felt like he messed up but at some point he felt like he messed up and But at some point he felt like he messed up. By giving away his evidence? Yes. Yes, Ronald. Yes. So he calls them up. He tries to get it back.

And he says that for like months they put him off and put him off and put him off. And then they were like, oh, we're really sorry, but that has gotten misplaced. Not quite. So he was honest with them. He said, I'm going to sue you guys. I want that back as evidence. Shows cards too soon. You think so?

Yeah, but I mean, what else was he supposed to say? I was going to say, yeah, because I do wonder if you get some sort of protection if you're like, that's evidence in a lawsuit. Yeah, that's true. But then finally, he got the mouse back. And it was destroyed. The higher-ups at Mountain Dew had let a mouse into that can of soda.

And then, just when they knew they'd been caught, they destroyed the evidence. But do you think that Ronald was the type of guy who would let them get away with this? Absolutely not. Ronald looked at himself in the mirror. And he said, let's go to court. So, you know what I'm struggling with right now? What? I wrote this script one way when I felt one way about this case.

Do you feel different about it now? I don't know. I feel it's a lot less cut and dry. So I wrote this very sarcastically toward Ronald. But basically, by this point, he's feeling like Mountain Dew really screwed him over. He lost wages. He experienced pain and suffering. He had medical bills.

Why did he lose wages? And why did he have medical bills? Because he ingested mouse? Well, yeah, that can't be good for you. But also, you have medical bills because he ingested mouse well yeah that can't be good for you but also i mean you touched him you touched a fucking bat and didn't go get rabies shots i went to the emergency room and when they were like ma'am we really need to give you 18 shots you're like no thank you they never said they needed to they just said this they would recommend it they didn't say they'd recommend it. What did they say? Kristen, tell us what they said.

Okay, this is hard because it was many moons ago. But they laid out the treatment for rabies. And they said, you know, it's just totally up to you. If you'd like to get it done, if you'd like to get 18 shots, then we'll give them to you. But, you know, no need. I don't think they said it like that, Kristen. I believe they did. The bottom line was, I don't think that bat bit me. Well, do you have rabies now?

No. So I think I'm in the clear, right? Do you have the ability to turn into a bat? If I did, do you think I would tell you? No, you wouldn't. I'd just flap on over to your house. That's right. Hang out for a while. Lost wages, medical bills.

Yep. And that he sustained disability, which I'm like, that's in quotation marks. I don't know what kind of disability you I mean I'm not downplaying that yeah this is disgusting I'm sure you would vomit your head off but yeah maybe that was it maybe he could no longer work without his head you know there are many jobs that you can't perform without your hat. Like, maybe he had really been doing great things as a hat model. At Marathon Oil? Yeah, sure.

On top of that, they tried to ruin this lawsuit before it could even get started. Yeah, by destroying the evidence, which Ronald never should have sent them. I agree. In his lawsuit against PepsiCo, which PepsiCo owns Mountain Dew, he mentioned the damaged mouse. His complaint read, By the time defendant PepsiCo eventually did return said evidence to plaintiff, the evidence was in deplorable condition from having remained saturated in the liquid for an extended period of time and having been subjected to destructive testing

by defendant Pepsico, which severely damaged the head, leg, and lung of the mouse, such that the evidence is now unfit for further testing. Side note. Yes? Casey loves Mountain Dew. It's one of her favorite really sodas yes and when she's not a 13 year old boy does she know this yes but when we were recently on our girls trip to

wisconsin we stopped and had lunch with my grandparents in iowa on the way home i went to this restaurant and it had like an old-timey mountain dew ad, like, on the wall. It was, like, one of those places that has all the shit on the wall, like shenanigans. And the ad said something about, like, Mountain Dew. It'll tickle your insides. What? Yes. Well, that's kind of what happened to the mouse.

I know. Do you want to say maybe this is what they had in mind? I wouldn't say mean things about Casey. She's not yet forgiven you for the snake story. I haven't forgiven myself for the snake story. Okay, I think a lot of people are on that same page with her. Ronald sued PepsiCo for breach of warranty and spoilation of evidence. He wanted a judge. Is that a word?

Apparently. Well, it's underlined in red squiggles. So, you tell me. I mean, word disagrees, but it was in an article. The active of... The active? Did I say the active? You sure did.

It's not what it says at all. It says the action of ruining or destroying something. Well, it's a real word. Except it's spoliation. Maybe that's why it's underlined in red squiggles. But why would it be spoliation? I think it makes way more sense to say spoliation. I completely agree.

I think that fucking dictionary.com is wrong. Well, I think that the English language is a mess. Spoilation. I completely agree. I think that fucking dictionary.com is wrong. Well, I think that the English language is a mess. It is. Okay, so he wanted a judgment of at least $325,000. What are your thoughts on that? $325,000? Yeah, at least. I think that's low for ingesting a mouse.

I think so, too. I really do. Yes. I mean, that is disgusting low so some sites said he wanted 75 000 in damages others said 50k either way i'm kind of like that's way too really he came in low super low right away the makers of mountain dew began mounting their defense. And their defense was so disgusting that it went viral. Do you remember

what their defense was? No. Okay. So I'm going to pause here. The makers of Mountain Dew have been accused of having a dead mouse in one of their soda cans.

What do you think is the grossest thing that they can say in their own defense? I don't know. Really? Yeah. What is it? Tell me. Okay.

So the attorneys for PepsiCo. Oh! What? Say it. Okay. This is my guess. Okay. Guess.

Couldn't have possibly been in there that long or it would have been completely destroyed by the Mountain Dew. It would have been liquefied. Okay, very, very good. Is that what they said? So the attorneys for PepsiCo brought in experts to examine the soda

and the mouse itself. And veterinary pathologist Lawrence McGill came to an interesting conclusion. PepsiCo knew that the can in question had been shipped and sealed in August of 2008. So if the mouse had been in that can, it would have had to have been in there for several months. But the mouse was in pretty good condition. But the mouse was in pretty good condition. In fact, in Lawrence's opinion, the mouse looked too good, considering all that Mountain Dew that he'd been floating in.

Lawrence said that if you put a mouse into a can of Mountain Dew, after a period of like anywhere from four to seven days, its bones would start to dissolve. Its head and stomach would explode. And after 30 days, the mouse would disintegrate into a jelly like substance. The only evidence, oh god this is so gross, the only evidence you'd find of a mouse in that can would possibly be part of the tale. Bleh! Bleh! Right? That is disgusting. It is revolting. In Lawrence's professional opinion, the mouse that Ronald had sent to PepsiCo couldn't have been floating in Mountain Dew for more than seven days. In other words, this was some sort of hoax. PepsiCo was not at fault.

This was just an attempt to get some money. That was their legal argument. Wow. That our product dissolves mouse. Would have destroyed that mouse! Extreme! legal argument. Wow. That our product dissolves What a disgusting mouth! Extreme! Don't you worry about what it's doing to your insides. Yeah.

The fact that PepsiCo would go with this defense shocked a lot of people. Yeah. Why, Brandi? Because good luck selling your product after putting that out there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In their article, The Wire said, This seems like a winning the battle while surrendering the war kind of strategy.

Yes, it does. That hinges on the argument that Pepsi's product is essentially a can of bright green slash yellow battery acid. Yes. Yeah. is essentially a can of bright green slash yellow battery acid. Yes! Yeah! Another article described their defense as brilliant from a legal standpoint and terrible from a PR standpoint. But at the same time, it's like, okay.

Well, we'll talk later about what we think the strategy should have been because there's more information coming. Okay. And let's see if I forget to come back to it. Probably. Yeah. Anybody want to place bets?

What's interesting is the original story about Ronald finding the dead mouse in his Mountain Dew didn't go viral. But this defense did. Which I think is partly because of the timing like ronald found this thing in like oh wait oh wait yeah oh wait so yeah the things weren't going viral to the extent that they do now shortly after news of pepsico's defense hit the media the tonight show did a sketch where they created like a mountain dew aerosol can and they had like a cartoon mouse that they sprayed it with and killed it. People were fascinated by this disgusting defense and they wanted to know if it was true. Yeah.

So they just start putting mice in. So would a mouse really dissolve your face? So would a mouse really dissolve your face? Would a mouse really dissolve into a jelly-like substance after 30 days? No. No? That's my hypothesis. I'm sorry.

You need to put it into an if-then statement. If a mouse is fully submerged in Mountain Dew for a period of 30 days, then I believe my experiment will prove that PepsiCo is lying. That seemed really weak. And it will not liquefy. You don't, okay. Okay, here's a question. Do you think there would be any changes yeah i do think there would be changes what do you think would happen i think it would swell oh and probably

not be able to come out of the mountain dew can yeah so you'd never oh gross ew ew okay okay because i don't think that i think that normal deterioration normal decomposition from a mouse dying would take care of a lot of things that they laid out and what would happen if a mouse was submerged in Mountain Dew for a period of however long

it's not going to get rid of hair and if you've ever seen a mouse before christian you know they're covered in hair so you're saying that that's what would be left or among the things that would among the things that would be left i'd say that a lot of what they are talking about that could happen because the mouse is in the diet mountain dew or i'm sorry regular mountain dew i don't know why i said diet mountain dew because i don't only Pop. You only drink Diet. I only drink Diet Pops. Yeah. So what I'm saying is I believe that a lot of those things could happen just naturally because of decomposition.

Okay. But hair doesn't decompose like that. Okay. I don't. You know you're going to find out, right? I know. So. Because every yahoo on the internet is gonna try it all these little mice are gonna die reporters began peter's gonna be pissed

reporters began calling scientists and asking them is this this possible? Could Mountain Dew dissolve a mouse? One food scientist said no. He said there's not enough acid in one can of Mountain Dew to cause those kinds of physical changes in a mouse. Hold on, pause. Let me open my diet cream soda. Appears to be mouse-free. You won't know until you take one swig of it.

Smells like vanilla. Okay. Oh, and there she goes to vomit. Tastes delicious. Barely taste the mouse, because it's been in there for 90 days. So what he said was the mouse would definitely go bad. It would smell horrible. But it wouldn't dissolve.

The guy said basically, if you put a mouse in a giant vat of Mountain Dew, then maybe it would disintegrate. But not just one can. Yeah. Another researcher weighed in for Scientific American. And he said that Mountain Dew could dissolve a mouse, but it would take a few months. Yeah, because the natural decomposition would need to take place as well.

He disagreed with PepsiCo's expert, who said that the mouse would disappear into a jelly-like substance. He said that you'd still be left with collagen and soft tissue floating in the Mountain Dew, and that it would be more rubbery than jelly-like. Oh, God. I'm just like, oh. What about the hair? Did he mention the hair?

He did not mention the hair. I'm so sorry. You may be asking yourself, who am I to trust? Some dude on the internet who films it and puts it on YouTube. I have to get to the bottom of this. Please pause while we go conduct our own experiment. You know I always have Mountain Dew on hand. That's right.

And mice. There's no way I'm going to get to the end of this day without knowing. Don't worry, Brandy. Tell us. We will get to the bottom of this. Tell us. I've got something way worse for you. What?

You were right. You can find out on YouTube. Is it? And I'm going to make you watch it. You are? Yes. Oh my gosh. Okay. So, a few people on YouTube did try this. I'm going to send you to it. You are? Yes. Oh my gosh. Okay. Okay. So a few people on YouTube did try this. I'm going to send you to the one that I watched yesterday. I could only watch one. I almost threw up.

Just warning you. Okay. Okay. It's by this channel called Esteem Interactive Learning. And I think if you just type in Esteem Interactive Learning Mountain Dew Mouse. How many Z's is that? I typed like three Z's. There's no Z's in a steep... Obviously!

Mountain Dew Mouse. Okay, so it's three minutes, 37 seconds long. Mouse and Mountain Dew Experiment? Yes. Three minutes and 37 seconds? Okay, did you just click on it? Yes. Okay, I'm muting mine.

You don't have to mute yours. They've got a bunch of extra stuff at the beginning. I would start it at... a minute and 48 seconds. So they've got a dead rat that they purchased from the pet store. You see him putting it into that jar with a pair of tongs, gingerly shoving the tail in there, pouring the Mountain Dew over at the top.

Oh, Brandy's leaning away from her computer as if that's going to help anything. I can't believe you're forcing me to watch this right now. Although I'm also very interested. I know. They're sealing it up. They kind of have it in like a canister so day one oh god oh god so day by by day four it looks like strawberry lemonade oh day 15 oh it looks worse oh it's so cloudy day 23 why is it foaming out oh god day 30 here we are day 37 they say just to be extra sure. So on day 37, they take it outside, put it on like a sidewalk, open it up.

Oh, God. Oh, God. Why am I watching this? Holy shit. They're just now opening it on my video, Kristen. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, I can't watch. Describe what you're seeing.

Okay, they're taking it out with oh oh god so they oh god it's not it's oh huh okay i'm i'm having to look away it's not liquefied oh my god oh god oh god the tail is still there oh okay so they end the video saying, Congrats, Pepsi, your product will definitely dissolve rodent flesh. So, okay, pause your video. Are you done? Okay. Brandi, are you okay?

That was disgusting. So, here's part of the reason it disgusted me so much. Like two days ago, we had a very belated Father's Day celebration, and my dad wanted North Carolina barbecue, which I always do in like a crock pot. And you pulled the pork up like that? Exactly. I had that exact pair of tongs, and once you put it in the crock pot overnight, it just falls apart like that.

Oh, my God. I disagree with their conclusion. Yeah, I don't think that's completely because it was still there. But and did you notice the fur? There was further. Definitely. Congratulations, Brandy. Are you on your high horse about this?

No, I'm so disgusted. The tail was completely intact. Yeah. Which, God. Oh my God. Why are you watching it again? I'm not, that's you. Why am I watching it again? God, I feel like I'm in an argument

with Grandma over here. Who made that sound where's that noise coming from so um i oh god i don't even know what to say. So the scientific community clearly kind of disagrees with itself. I think... Man, you give that... I guess I kind of agree. You give that thing 60 days, that's going to be gone.

Minus the tail. I mean, 37 days, God, that was disgusting. If anyone wants to watch that, we'll put the link to it in the show notes. God. Are you ever going to forgive me? Look at you.

I don't like it. Yeah, it was really gross. I didn't care for that at all, Kristen. You know what it was? At first, I was like, I'm not watching it. Then I watched it, and I almost threw up. And then I was like, I want to make Brand. Then I watched it and I almost threw up. And then I was like, I gotta make Brandy watch it. Why, thank you, Kristen.

Best friend of mine. Yeah. Too late to find a new one. Good ones are already taken. The other part of PepsiCo's argument that got lost in all of this, and I don't understand why they didn't just go with this argument alone, just from a pure PR standpoint. Dr. Lawrence McGill autopsied the mouse that Ronald had sent to PepsiCo,

and he said that the mouse was two to four weeks old at most. And maybe even might have been a very young rat. In other words, the mouse was way too young to have gotten into the Mountain Dew when it was bottled in August of 2008. Canned. They said bottled, but yeah, I agree. Canned.

I think that's just the term they use probably, I'm guessing. Canned makes it sound like the mouse got fired. From his little mouth. From his little mouth. Pooralph took his little brief do you think he was the type to like every morning get up take a shower and then walk to the train station and pretend that he was still at work and then he went home and he murdered his whole mouse family then he got away with it for 30 years. That's right. Until a little show called America's Most Wanted

Mouse Edition. If you'd like to hear the human version of that story, that is episode number Family Annihilator is episode 19. How are you so good at this? I have no idea. I don't know if that's correct at all. It sounds right.

I think I've guessed episode 19 15 different times. Well, we definitely called it the family annihilator. It's definitely the family annihilator. Let's see. Definitely not 19. Hmm. 18. I was so close.

You were very close. Partial credit. Thank you. So, oof. Ronald's lawyer disagreed. His lawyer was Eddie Unsell. And Eddie said that either Lawrence McGill was just plain wrong from a scientific standpoint, or PepsiCo was lying about when the can was bottled.

Or Ralph is lying. I mean, Ralph's attorney's not going to say that. Well, his name is not Ralph. It's Ronald. Ralph was the nickname ronald's attorney was not going to be like oh my client's full of shit and i'm wasting my time ronald might be full of shit see that's what I struggled with in this. Like, I went thinking Ronald was totally full of shit. Yeah.

But then I started to think, what if I'm wrong? And what if this poor guy really did take a swig of Mountain Dew with a dead mouse in it? And then just out of pure naivete, sent it off in a mason jar to Mountain Dew. I don't know. I hope he's full of shit. Otherwise, this is just so sad. I know, I don't know.

So his attorney said that Ronald had witnesses who watched him go to the vending machine, buy the soda, open it, take a sip, and become violently ill. Yeah, witnesses he's promised $10,000 to. Wow. So smug.

So smug. So this will surprise absolutely no one, but this did not go to trial. In August of 2012, Ronald and Pepsiico reached a confidential settlement oh i hate confidential settlement i know i know so ronald got some money and pepsico gets to continue to deny liability and that's the story of the most disgusting defense i have ever heard that's super disgusting Okay, do you mind if we pause so I can get some more iced tea?

No. I feel like I'm going to vomit. Get some iced tea. Don't get any Mountain Dew. Oh, my God. Oh, Lord. Oh, Lord. All right.

So that was disgusting. That was disgusting. Are you enjoying your nice big glass of Mountain Dew over there? No, I... Okay, I'm not into Mountain Dew at all. I've always thought it was a drink. Maybe it's because of marketing from when we were kids. It was marketed to like...

Do the do. Yeah, boys on skateboards. And I was like, that'll never be me. That'll never be a boy on a skateboard. Because I've got a vagina and rollerblades casey really likes mountain dew so she's like i said probably gonna be even more pissed at you now um because you talked about snakes last week and mountain dew this week in a disgusting manner what else does she love slash hate? Maybe I could just target her.

I'll drink a diet Mountain Dew. If there's a mouse in it. No. No mouse in it. Oh. How would you know? Because they dissolve into a jelly-like substance. All right.

Let's talk about something a little bit less disgusting. Okay. like substance all right let's talk about something a little bit less disgusting okay let's talk about the phony pony bandit i'm so excited what is this what is it what is it September 25th, 2012. We're in Stanwood, Washington, which is in Snohomish County. You sure? My favorite county in Washington, Snohomish. They call it Snoco for short in a lot of the news articles. That's so sweet. I think it's so cute.

A sheriff's deputy, who I'm going to call John Doe, because... Why? I only found one article that mentioned him by name, and it wasn't from a super reputable news source. Okay. So I'm wondering if they didn't report his name for a reason. Interesting. I'm not going to report his name. He's clearly the victim of something.

Is he? Well, yeah. And it had to have been a sex crime for them to not mention him right what did this phony pony bandit do to this man he was not the victim of sex and so okay we'll get there all right so deputy john doe is on the beat there's been an increase in bank robberies in the area as of late and so they've upped patrols around lots of banks throughout i don't know why I said throughout that way, throughout Snohomish County. Through, space, out. Snohomish County.

At this time, it was believed that there were multiple bank robbers operating in this county. Banks were getting robbed left and right. And among them were some pretty good nicknames. and right and among them were some pretty good nicknames there was the tour de bank bandit because uh he was seen riding a bike to and from big robberies right okay and then there was the phony pony bandit who got his name from the disguise he wore, which was a long, cheap wig that was pulled back in a ponytail. Okay. So, Deputy John Doe is on the beat.

He's strolling. He's got that big ring of keys. No, he doesn't. This is not a cartoon. He's got his nightstick in the other. He's just twirling them. Great. It's like, it's like 1020 in the morning. He's walking down the street, whistling a little tune. He stops to tie a shoe. And when he looks over at Key Bank, which side note, my brother-in-law,

James works for Key Bank. Oh, great. Okay. I-in-law, James, works for Key Bank. Oh, great. Okay. I didn't realize they had branches, but they do other places, just not here in Kansas City. He works at, like, an office. Okay. Anyway, that's very important to the story. It is.

Did everyone write this down? It's not at all important. Turns out, Brandy's brother-in-law robs banks. It's the phony part of it! No. So, Deputy Doe leans down to tie his shoe he looks over what he sees a bicycle outside of key bank and james is on it and he's like huh not good so he ties his shoe real fast usually he does like the loop swoop and pull the rabbit

you know um real fast he gets up he goes to scope out the bank a little more and he sees that there is a something propping the door open and this is one of the other things that the bank robbers who had been operating in this area had been doing. It was like a bag with like a block of wood in it that the robber would drop as he was walking in to keep the door propped open so that the bank could not initiate the automatic locks from inside the bank while they were in there. So I didn't even know banks had this. No. But it's part of like a theft control system where they can hit a switch and lock the doors remotely uh-huh so yeah propping the door open so they couldn't do that and lock him inside

the bank so this is someone with some bank knowledge some bank knowledge of some kind or perhaps someone who's already robbed a couple banks and maybe learned the hard way about the so deputy doe is sure that he has caught one of the bank robbers in the act sure he radios in for backup he continues around to the front of the bank and that's when he sees that the tour de banks bandit and the phony pony bandit are one in the same no yes there inside the bank is the phony pony bandit oh but the phony pony bandit has already seen the deputy's car in the area and so he's already on high alert. He's freaking the fuck out. He's inside the bank. He's already brandished a gun and demanded money. And the door's propped open, so he knows he's going to have to make a run for it here quickly.

Right. And so he gets the money. He shoves it in his pockets, and he heads for the door. Deputy Doe pulls his gun. Phony Pony Bandit runs from the bank and brandishes his gun at the deputy. The deputy fires one shot, hits the Phony Pony Bandit in the leg. Phony Pony Bandit takes off running. He's running.

Still running. He runs across the street through a busy grocery store parking lot the deputy fires off another shot no in another shot no you shouldn't do that with that many people around yeah i agree i wonder if that's maybe why people didn't report his name i'm not sure well but even still why he's not the victim i i don't understand i don't know why his name wasn't reported but his name isn't reported in any of the articles i pulled from it was only reported in a blog which is why i did not yeah yeah yeah okay so anyway he fires off another shot and another crowded

fucking parking lot yeah that that has to be against protocol why would you risk that i would sure think so phony pony bandit drops to the ground. People are screaming left and right. People are yelling, get down, get down. A man is trying to walk out of his eyeglasses appointment. The employee yanks him by the collar and pulls him back inside. Yeah, kids are crying. Glass is breaking. The phony pony bandit is taken into custody, but he is badly injured.

Well, I bet so. He's been shot. Twice. I think three times. Oh, my. Yeah. He was actually lifelighted to an area hospital where he remained for a month recovering from his injuries he went into surgery immediately and he was in the hospital for a month before he was released to police custody so while he's been taken off to the hospital

the scene is kind of locked down there's a huge area is taped off because there's been this extended shoot shootout, basically. Right. Deputy Joe is immediately put on administrative leave because he's, um, what's shot somebody. Sure.

That'll work. That's not the word I was looking for because he shot somebody. Sure, that'll work. That's not the word I was looking for, but yes, he shot somebody. Now, okay, I feel like this is just my episodes of Law & Order talking, but don't they always, like, if you've shot somebody, don't they, like, give you some leave so that they can just kind of dot their eyes and cross their teeth? Yes, and that's exactly what happens, yeah. Yeah. Yep.

So they're like, okay, we're going to investigate this. You're on paid administrative leave. Yes. And that's exactly what happens. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. So they're like, okay, we're going to investigate this. You're on paid administrative leave while we look into this and make sure, you know, everything was on the up and up. He says, so the deputy story right off the bat is that the man, the bandit came out of the, out of the bank, brandished his gun. He told him to put it down. He did not. And that's when he fired. Right. When he actually called for backup after initially interacting with the bank robber, radio chatter that was heard actually made it sound like perhaps the bandit fired first. And so that's what initially was reported, that the deputy returned fire. But in the investigation of the scene, this is what was found. A long black wig, sunglasses, a white t-shirt, a black sweatshirt, a coat, and blood-soaked blue jeans. Inside the jeans, they found $5,850 wadded up in the pocket. How do you even fit that much money in the pocket of blue jeans?

Well, you know what's so funny is this whole time I've been thinking, my God, shots fired across a grocery store parking lot. Yeah. All over. My guess was $5,000. Yeah, that's insane.

It is insane. In addition, they found a police scanner that the bandit had been wearing, like it was clipped to his belt and then he had an earphone in it so that he could listen to it so that he could listen to it, so that he could listen if anybody was in the area. They also found a.25 caliber semi-automatic pistol

on the ground next to the suspect when they took him into custody. There was no magazine and no ammunition found anywhere in the gun or on the bandit. No Cosmo, no Glamour, no guns in the ammo? No, nothing. The gun was not loaded. Oh. Wait, so where did this rumor get started that he shot first if the gun was not loaded? Exactly.

So it's believed after investigation that that was misconstrued or misheard, that the deputy never made any claims that he shot first. Only that he brandished the gun. He pointed the gun at the deputy. The deputy told him to lower his weapon. He did not. And so the deputy shot. Gotcha. The deputy told him to lower his weapon. He did not. And so the deputy shot. Gotcha. Gotcha.

Which I believe is protocol. Mm-hmm. It doesn't. How is the deputy to know that the gun is not loaded? Sure. Yeah. Yeah. I can't imagine it's protocol to shoot across a crowded parking lot, though. No.

No, no, no, no, no. No. But. Well, the important thing is that they get that $5,000. If they have to shoot a small child, you know. But. Well, the important thing is that they get that $5,000. If they have to shoot a small child, you know. Right. A human life is worth $1,000 max, right? Jesus.

Okay. So in addition to all of that that they found at the scene, they found the bicycle that had been parked outside the bank. They found the bicycle that had been parked outside the bank. And what they believed had been happening with the tour de banks robber is that he was coming to and from the scene on bicycle, but that he had a car stashed nearby because the bicycle was always found ditched somewhere. Uh-huh. And the bandit was getting away from the scene very quickly. Sure. And so about 100 yards away from the bank, they found a Honda Civic parked on the side of the road with the windows down

and the key in the ignition. Yep. So this is when they determined, like, this is the Tour de Banks robber and the Phony Pony Bandit. They are the same person. Yes. So, who is he?

Who is the Tour de Banks slash Phony P pony bandit? Inside the car, they found a wallet with an identification. The bandit's name was Todd Kirkpatrick. And it was surprising that that's who it was because he was somewhat known in the area as a real estate developer. Oh. So he was a businessman in the area who had bought up some waterfront property pre-2008 housing collapse with the plans of developing it into this really nice upscale neighborhood and then when the

housing collapse happened he lost it all he sold a couple of the properties lost the rest of them to the bank basically lost all of his money and yeah he had a wife and kids that he had to support. And when all of that happened, he developed a drinking problem as well. And so by 2012, this is what he had turned to, robbing banks. So he was arrested, obviously. And in 2013, he actually pled guilty to this robbery and three others. He pled guilty to four bank robberies, totaling, do you have a guess how much money? So pled guilty to three? To four total. Four total.

This one, you know, he got about $5,000 or he took $5,000 from the bank. $25,000. $25,000. $20,000. Yeah. It's just not that lucrative. That's not enough money! No, it's totally not. This is a terrible crime!

It is so not worth the risk! Well, and I'm thinking, people who rob banks these days are not true crime fans. Because if they were, they would know you don't make much money at all and you get like seriously punished for it yeah because it's a federal crime yes yes absolutely not if you were to rob something what would you do what would i rob i don't know. I just think it's a terrible crime altogether. I don't,

the chances of getting away with any type of robbery are so slim. I know. I know. Yeah. I mean, it's no art theft. No, don't get me started on art theft.

Okay. You know, you know how not lucrative it is to rob a bank would you rather rob a museum yeah the risk of getting caught is way less exactly yeah so i guess and the stuff is way more valuable no because you don't i disagree what am i i'm just gonna hang it in my garage kristin no you sell it on the black nobody's gonna buy it it's not true okay this is a very very side note but have you ever seen the show idiot test no it's a game show uh-huh you know how obsessed i am with the game show network it's all you watch i love

the game movie night when we come over is like the one two hour period when you are not watching game show network i'll tell you i just just switched to Google Fiber. You know? Yeah. I had to get a special package that included the Game Show Network. It's $10 extra to get the Game Show Network. You're paying $10 a month to watch game shows. I am. Even Steve Harvey wouldn't endorse that.

I fucking love the Game Show Network. In the mornings when I'm getting ready for work, they play the old match game from the 60s and 70s. It's amazing. Charles Nelson Reilly's up there smoking a pipe. Richard Dawson's got a cigarette and he's kissing all the contestants. I'm worried about you because you know what? That's giving you the impression that smoking is cool. And it's not, Brandi.

It's definitely not. Betty White's on there looking young and gorgeous. Betty White still looks gorgeous. She does still look gorgeous. Yeah. She does. I agree. All right.

All right. She's like 97 years old. Looks amazing. Oh, no. What? What? She's going to die now. Because we've said this?

Yes. Should we say something bad about her? Do you know who we killed? What are you talking about? We killed somebody. What we've said this? Yes. Should we say something bad about her? Do you know who we killed? What are you talking about? We killed somebody. What are you talking about? We killed Violet Beauregard. Who's Violet Beauregard?

From Willy Wonka. After we talked about that episode, she died that week. No. The girl who played Violet Beauregard died that week. Yes. Oh, gosh. And Casey, I was talking to Casey, and she's like you guys killed violet and i was like i know anyway okay idiot test is this game show where it's like all trick questions like you have

to pick stuff out on a like a you get a visual aid you have to pick out the right answer but it's all tricky stuff you have to pay very close attention to punctuation or what the question is really asking and whatever anyway one of the things was about an art thief and I can't remember exactly what it was okay but the girl the contestant picked the right answer and then she was explaining how she knew it was the right answer and she's like well this person's literally gonna steal that art and then I don't know I guess go put it in their criminal lair because what else are you gonna do with it and i was like this girl fucking gets it wait that whole long story was for that yeah because she because someone on the game show network shared my opinion

unlike you kristen i'm gonna call her up and see if she wants to be my new long-term friend. Wow. You know what? I bet you she'll be no fun. Anyway. Mm-hmm. So in November of 2013, Todd Kirkpatrick pleads guilty to four bank robberies. He said that it was the only way he could think of to support his family after his whole life fell apart. By this time, he was like 56-year-old. He was a husband and a father. 56-year-old, huh?

What did I say? 56-year-old. Insert, you know, do one of those carrot marks. Yeah. He had been a very involved father. His children actually testified at his sentencing that said that he had worked very hard to provide for his family. He worked as a fisherman in Alaska for years. And then he built their home on his own.

own. And his children said that he was the reason that they were so successful in their life, that he worked tirelessly to give them more than he had ever had growing up. So he talked about how he had robbed these multiple banks and how, remember what I said about the block in the door? Yeah. So on one instance, he attempted to rob a bank and they saw him coming in. This was after he had already robbed a bank and so his image had already been out there as the phony pony bandit and when they saw him coming they locked the doors remotely yes yeah and so that's how he knew to put the block in the door so that he wouldn't get trapped in the bank yeah i mean that's some forward thinking yeah no i i'm not

calling him an idiot well actually yeah i am calling him an idiot. Well, actually, yeah, I am calling him an idiot because he risked all of that for $20,000. Yeah. That's dumb. That's really dumb. I think it's really dumb. So at his sentencing on November 21st, 2013, his wife said all of those things that I kind of already said, that she, this wasn't him. This was not the usual for him. This was the picture of a man who had fallen on hard times and was at his wits end and didn't know what else to do. His defense attorney said, this is a unique case, Your Honor. What you have is a cocktail of losing a lot of money, depression, alcohol, and pride. aspiring developer he bought all those properties and then he lost it all after the housing boom he lost all of the money he invested in the land and from there his life and actions started spiraling out of control he started drinking heavily his pride kept him from reaching out for help. And so he robbed his first bank in July of 2012. He robbed that

same bank a month later. And then he robbed when he made his third attempt, that's where he was unable to enter because they did the doors. And then a few days after that, he robbed another bank. It was two days after that, he made another attempt on a new bank and stole $4,000. That's just not worth it. No, it's not. I feel like get yourself a side hustle or get yourself like if you just went and tried to get a real job, I feel like it wouldn't take you that long to make some money. And then you're not going to be criminally liable for anything. Not at all.

So at his sentencing, Todd Kirkpatrick apologized to the people who were impacted by what he did. He said, I'd like to apologize to the victims I terrorized. And he, as he said this, like there were two women who had been tellers at banks that he robbed that were sitting there at the hearing, and he looked at them directly in their faces and apologized to them. I think that would be terrorizing. Of course it would. You would think that your life was at risk. Absolutely. Yes. So he was facing 20 years for these bank robberies oh my gosh 20 20 years over twenty thousand dollars yes um eight of those years were because of a law

that washington has called the hard time for armed crime law. So under that law, if a firearm is involved in a felony, it is these enhancements are added to the charge. And so those eight years, you must serve every minute of them. There is no time taken off for good behavior. Wow. Yeah. I think that's a...

I like that law. I like that law, too. Yeah. Yeah. So he's facing 12 years for the robberies and eight years for the firearms enhancements. At the end of his sentencing hearing he was sentenced to 17 years in prison so eight of those he has to serve yeah no matter what and then the rest of them can get reduced by about half um if he for good behavior so that's a long fucking time for

twenty thousand dollars five thousand of it which he never got his hands on because I don't know where the rest of the money is, but that last $5,000 of it he never got. Oh. Not worth it. Not worth it at all. This is not the end of the story. Okay. Following his sentencing.

He's over in prison, serving his time. It's now 2013. And he files a civil suit against Deputy John Doe and the county of Snohomish for $6.3 million. I'm sorry, what? What do you think he sued them for? I don't even know.

For shooting him. Well, too damn bad. You had a gun. You had a gun. You had a gun and you pled guilty to charges saying you had a gun. These are the hazards of robbing a bank, my dude. Yeah. So, yes, in 2013, he files a $6.3 million lawsuit against Snohomish County and the deputy

who shot him, saying that it was unnecessary use of force and that he had $300,000 of medical bills due to that, the injuries that he sustained from that shooting. And then the rest was all for, you know, like mental suffering and loss of wages and all of that. And, oh, the bank robbing didn't work out so well. So now he's not able to rob any more banks now. He was going to pull off, because he got shot. That's what the loss of wages is. He was going to pull off his biggest heist yet.

So I totally agree he shouldn't have shot across that parking lot. I agree that he shouldn't have shot across the parking lot. I think that was poor judgment and definitely probably against protocol. Yeah. Yeah. But I think that if you're a police officer and you are you have your gun drawn and a suspect has a gun on you and their gun drawn and you tell them to put their gun down and they don't. Yeah. You shoot them. Of course. Of course you shoot them. You have no way to know that that gun was not loaded. Right. And he didn't or that he wouldn't turn around and fire it at a bunch of people exactly yeah this guy i'm done with this guy i wasn't that sympathetic to begin with yeah he said that the deputy who shot him was trying to execute him and that the other officers that had responded to the scene for backup failed to intervene.

What were they supposed to do? I guess take his side over their co-workers. Sorry, buddy. I'm with this dude in the wig. Right? Can you believe that? I think this is nuts. I should stop being amazed by some of the lawsuits people bring when they're in prison.

Because, you know, they've got nothing to lose. So, of course, why not make a ridiculous lawsuit? I assume he represented himself like an idiot. I would assume so. That's ridiculous. Yeah. I keep thinking of Jared Fogle bringing those lawsuits after he was in prison. Yes.

And like, okay, good luck. Yeah, exactly. Bringing that suit for money laundry. Are you ready to hear the craziest part? No. A jury decided in his favor. No, they didn't. Not for that amount, but $2 million.

What? Yeah, they gave him $2 million. What are you talking about? They said it was an unnecessary use of force. Wow. No, I'm totally fucking with you. Oh, God. Oh, my God.

The case was dismissed by a judge who was like, you're a fucking idiot. You get nothing. And is this revenge for all the times I've pulled that shit on you? And when it was dismissed, Todd Kirkpatrick was like, yeah, I figured that's what would happen. Oh, my God. And that's the story of the phony pony bandit. That was so good. That was so good. That was so good.

I had to do something lighter. I could not talk about a murder this week. No. Too much murder. Way too much murder. Berenstain Bears, too much murder. A lot of people don't know that one. Okay, but it's not Berenstain Bears.

It's Berenstain Bears. Did you know this? Yes, I knew this. It's so dumb. I don't believe it. I believe it. I don't believe it. I read those books all the time as a kid.

I would have bet you money it was Berenstain Bears. Well, people are wrong, including yourself. Including myself. I know. I've looked it up. I've gone and seen the books in the stores. You will not convince me that I didn't have one when I was a kid that was spelled E-I-N. Sorry, lady.

Baby, I'm sorry. Oh, my mom has a very important distinguishment for you. Distinguishment? Is that a word? I think so. What's going on? She would like you to know, Kristen, that scat is all animal droppings, not just snake droppings.

Well, thank you. There's a correction I never thought I'd get. So it's cat scat that's in the litter box downstairs? Cat scat, yeah. I don't know. And I've got to walk around the neighborhood with Peanut and pick up her scat? Man, I don't know. i don't know and i've got to walk around the neighborhood with peanut and pick up man i don't know i don't know let me go to dictionary.com for my second time today this says that scat is it's wild animals specifically okay that makes a lot more sense yeah specifically wild animals it's used for tracking

possum feral foxes and cats snakes birds lizards even insects wow this is from a this is from a tracking website great the great outdoors.com oh my gosh this was such a fun episode because it was just light-hearted no it was we didn't have to say oh my god that's horrifying although the mouse liquefying was pretty horrifying yeah no that was disgusting that was i cannot stop thinking about north carolina barbecue oh are you gonna be able to eat it still i hope so yeah i think i just made it too like i literally made it on saturday i researched this episode on Tuesday. It was just too much.

Legitimately, guys, the YouTube video is disgusting. If you don't have a strong stomach, don't watch it. Don't watch it. Do not watch it. Ugh. Yikes. Okay. But now, you know what it's time for?

Ooh! Supreme Court. Is it time for me to do my Tai Chi? Yeah, what are you doing over there? I don't know what are you doing over there? I don't know what I'm doing. My back's kind of tight. Oh, God.

What's happening? Stretching it out. I wore my yoga pants today so that I could do yoga while we record. I'm shocked by you wearing yoga pants. You mean butt pants? Butt pants? Yeah, that's what I call them just because like they show off the butt so much i mean not just anybody who wears them it shows off your butt not just my butt yeah

yeah i got you i didn't think you were being egotistical i wasn't i wasn't bragging about my own butt i was just saying butts in general yeah um no you've i've never seen you wear yoga pants outside the home yeah i don't usually and here you show up at my doorstep in your butt pants. My butt pants. No top. No top. No, don't you want to talk about what my shirt says? You have a sweatshirt on that says, what a nice day.

I think I'll wear black. And you're wearing all black. That's right. Because that's my entire wardrobe. No, I went and got my nails done before we recorded today. And I wanted it to be comfy. And then I didn't change before I came. I honestly was like, I'll go get my nails done.

And then I'll go change. And then I'll go. And there was no time. There was time. But I was like, nah, this is fine. Well, I'm offended because I'm sitting here in my best ball gown. Instead, I made our social media posts. So, alright.

Now, enough of that. Should we do our Supreme Court inductions? I think we should. Alright. You guys, this is the last week of us doing names along with zodiac signs. Next week, we'll be on to the next thing.

What will it be? Well, watch and find out listen and find out look and find out it's gonna be on the patreon so smell it and find out smell it and find out all right if everyone would please rise for this week's supreme court inductions put your hand over your heart, please. And remove all ball caps. The South African Fan Club. Leo. Michael McFarland.

Libra. Joseph. Aquarius. Ursula. Pisces. Quincy. Scorpio. Terry Brimmer Taurus

Angela Volk Virgo Welcome to the Supreme Court! Beautiful. As always. Mm-hmm. Welcome. I assume that comes with a big pay raise for all of you.

That's correct. Please, as soon as you get your placard in the mail, be sure to turn that in to your employer for your pay rate increase. Hey, guys. I've got a bone to pick with you. Kristen, I'm looking at you. Really? Why do you have a bone to pick with me, huh?

Well, have you rated and reviewed our podcast on iTunes? I thought it would be douchey. Yeah, I thought it would be douchey. I don't think you're supposed to rate and review your own podcast. Anyway, we have set a goal of 400. And here we are at a measly 313. Come on, people. I'm actually really impressed that we're at 313.

So thank you, everyone. Still, we're very angry. That's right. We're super angry. But thank you, everyone who has already left us a rating and a review on iTunes. If you have not already, please head on over there. Leave us a rating. Leave us a review.

Help us make it to 400. While you're at it, find us on social media, or on Facebook, or on Twitter, or on Instagram, or on Reddit, or on YouTube, or on Patreon. Find us. All of those places. And once you've done that, be sure to join us next week. When we'll be experts on two whole new topics. Podcast adjourned. And now for a note about our process. I read a bunch of stuff, then regurgitate it all back up in my very limited vocabulary. And I copy and paste

from the best sources on the web and sometimes Wikipedia. So we owe a huge thank you to the real experts. For this episode, I got my info from the Madison Record, theverge.com, and thewire.com. And I got my info. I'm sorry, and wired.com. I got my info from episodes of The Wire on HBO. It was not helpful, but very entertaining. And I got my info from articles

in the Everett Herald by Diana Heffley and Ricky King. For a full list of our sources, visit lgtcpodcast.com. Any errors are of course ours, but please don't take our word for it. Go read their stuff.