Life in Colour - 20: How Do I Stop Defaulting To Black All The Time? All Your Colour & Style Questions Answered...

Episode Date: September 25, 2025

In this episode of Life in Colour, I answer some of your most common wardrobe and colour questions! We cover everything from seasonal colours to quick outfit fixes, helping you feel confident and polished without overthinking your wardrobe. Here’s what we chat about: The difference between summer and winter colours and how wearing the right shades can make your skin glow. How to stop defaulting to black and start embracing colours that actually lift your look. The one thing to focus on when you’re short on time getting dressed so your outfit instantly feels put together. The best colour to invest in for a handbag or coat that will work across your wardrobe and stand the test of time. If you’ve ever wondered why some colours feel right and others don’t—or how to make dressing easy and fun—this episode is for you! If you would like to learn all about colour analysis and a step by step guide to discovering what colour palette you might be...come and join my FREE Find My Colours Masterclass next week on the 30th of September at 1pm and 7pm Sydney time. Click the link below to register.  https://www.lovingcolour.au/findmycoloursmasterclass Want to know more about a colour analysis with me? Go to https://www.lovingcolour.au/colouranalysis      

Welcome to Life in Color, the podcast where we dive into the real, raw and wonderfully colorful aspects of life. I'm your host, Ashley, and I'm here to explore the ins and outs of seasonal color analysis, navigating motherhood, thriving in your 40s and beyond, and embracing health and wellness with a healthy dose of humor. Join me as we uncover the secrets behind finding your perfect palette, share stories of the joys and challenges of being a mom. And from practical tips to heartfelt conversations, life in color is your space to laugh, learn and live life unapologetically in all of its colorful hues. So grab your favorite drink, settle in and let's add some color to this adventure that we call Life in Color.

Well, hello there. Welcome back to another episode of Life in Color. Thank you so much for joining me again. Hope you're having a great week. It is almost end of term here. We're in the final week of Term 3. I'm in Sydney, so I know that some people are already on school holidays. And we're actually going to be having a bit of a breakaway.

I cannot wait somewhere nice and warm. Now, I am hosting next week to free masterclasses. They are on helping you how to find your colours yourself and then also answering all of your questions to do specifically with colour analysis and how it works and what it means and how it helps you, all those kinds of things. If you're interested in that, go to the show notes and click the link link for Find My Colors Masterclass and you can join and register for that. It is a Zoom call masterclass so that way you get to see me.

Hopefully I get to see you if you're brave enough to turn on your camera. But also this way you can ask me questions live too about anything that you want to know to do with colour analysis. So make sure you go to the show notes and click the Find My Colours Masterclass link and you can sign up and join me. I've got two different options for next week. One is daytime. One is evening.

So fingers crossed, you'll be able to make it. Now, back to today's questions, they are a mix of like practical sort of everyday questions. wardrobe and styling questions. And then of course, of course, there had to be like color analysis questions too. Without further ado, let's get into it because I'm actually going to start trying to keep some of my episodes to around the 2030 minute mark, purely because I know how precious time is. You know, as a busy working mum of three teens, I know how time is. And sometimes when it's a really in-depth one, which I will have, especially with guests or depending on the topic, you have to kind of stop and start. But I just, for these ones, I just want to kind of keep them to around the 30 minutes.

So if you're going on a walk or if you're doing school drop off or you're like me cleaning the house and you're listening to a podcast episode, that's what I like to do. It just condenses it a little bit for you so that you can get through hopefully a full episode in one go. So this is from Liz and she's asked, what's a good color to invest in for a handbag or a coat? Do I go for a neutral or do I go for a specific color in my palette? Liz, I love that question. That is fabulous. Okay, where to start. Now, there's no right or wrong answer in this for anyone. I just want you to know that before we get into it. Look, I think there is an argument for both sides as to having a neutral and having a color, if I dare say.

But if you're wanting to invest, let's start with neutrals actually, because I think there is an argument for both. I would say everybody having a neutral in their palette for a handbag or a coat is really quite essential. Now the reasons that it's essential is because one thing with a neutral, you know that it can go with so many other things in your wardrobe. It can go with all of the colours that you've got. If you've gone obviously within your colour palette, so let's give some examples. If you are a spring having like a really nice caramel tan, I call that terrible, maybe I should start that as a new colour. Taramore for like a tan caramel. That's a really, really lovely colour to have within your wardrobe because it will go, whether you're a bright, a warm or a light, it interchanges

and goes so beautifully with all of your colours. If you are a winter, like going for that really deep French navy, obviously black if you're a winter, remember winters are the only season that can wear black. You know, that could work really, really well for you and that's a fabulous color to have within your wardrobe. If you are an autumn, obviously really rich, earthy tones, that really nice chocolate, like that milk chocolate. If you're a soft autumn, obviously, or if you're a deep autumn, you can go for sort of the darker, deeper kinds of chocolate. And then if you're a summer, a grey works really, really well. So if you're a cool summer, you can go more of like the charcoal grey. If you're a light summer, a soft summer, sort of that

feather kind of grey works really well. And I know that my wardrobe's literally just off. to the side of me. And I have one of my winter coats that I have, I've got two, one that I just bought this year, which is more like that puffery jacket kind of one. That's actually kind of in that really stone kind of colour. So being a light summer, I do like to wear light colours. So that stone works really well for me as a neutral. But I do have that feather grey as well and that I wear it all the time because it goes with everything within my colour palette, plus it goes with everything with my sister palettes too. So that's where neutrals can work really, really well for you Liz and they go with everything. Now, having said that, a big caveat on this is if

you know your colours and you know your colour palette, if you get one of your colours and one of your top five best colours. So if you have a colour analysis with me, you end up with your top five best colours. Now, the reason I do your top five best colours, A, because they're the standout ones that make you just look like the B's knees, like a million dollars. But secondly, those kinds of colours, they suit you so well, they go across seasons. So you'll find that, say, I'm just going to say a pink, because I've literally just got pink in front of me from drapes from when I did a in-person last week. When that's one of your top colours, it goes across all your sister seasons and even into some of the other seasons that you can borrow from just because that colour suits you so incredibly much.

Then you're going to have other colours that you wear it and it looks really, really lovely on you. Don't get me wrong. But say, for example, it's a purple. It's only the purple within your colour palette that suits you. And so that's the one that you stick to. I wouldn't recommend getting a handbag or a coat in those colours. If you're going to choose a colour, like a particular colour that's not a neutral, go for one of your top five. So for me, like for example, I have a blazer in my wardrobe.

That blazer is a teal. A teal, whilst it's obviously still a colour, it's sort of between a neutral and a colour because it goes with so many things. but before I had my colours done, I never knew that. I had never worn teal before. It was a complete revelation to me. And so from that, it goes, that colour because it suits me so well, I wear it with so many other colours in my wardrobe.

I wear it with blues. I wear it with pinks. I wear it with like navies. There are so many different colours that I wear it with, not just like a white, for example. So because of that, like, that stone color looks really, really lovely with it. And then that gives you that hint of color. The thing about having a coat and even a handbag in one of your colors, it becomes a real statement piece. And it just, if you're wearing all neutrals, for example, that then becomes

a statement piece that you're wearing. And it just looks amazing. And you just feel like you've got a bit of that color with you all the time, that you're not just, I mean, don't get me wrong, I wear all neutrals all the time as well. There are times when I do. 100% there are days where I, that's what I feel like wearing. But if you're going to invest, just have a look at those top five colours because I guarantee you there's going to be one in there that would work equally as well for you in a coat or a handbag as what it would if it was a neutral. I mean, if I had my way, and I did say this at the beginning, if I had my way, 100% I would have one of each. Now, I'm thinking of my, I've started introducing more colour in my shoes.

I do have a coat that's like in a mixture of colors. It's Ted Baker. Funnily enough, it is from when I was about 23 and I was living in the UK. It's got matching skirt. And it's like pinks and purples and blues, which literally are my top in my top five colors. And because of that, it goes with everything. Now, I didn't know that then. I just loved it like I've always loved pink. But it works so well for me. And I wear it all the time. And I just love it. So I don't know if that's necessarily, I hope that's answered your question, Liz. But when you're looking at your colours, so I've gone through. So just very quickly to recap for you, if you're looking at a neutral, for example,

and you're looking at getting a handbag in that colour, just have a think about whether you're warm or cool toned. If you're cool toned, buying a really orange tan, like a really warm-based one, that's not going to work for you. So make sure you're looking at sort of the cooler tone tans that have like a bit more of a pink undertone rather than an orange undertone. Obviously, winters I would say for black, black can be quite heavy for summers. If you're going to do for a summer, if you're wanting to do that, I would even for a handbag, you could do a navy. A navy is a really, really nice kind of colour to use so that it's a colour, but that it's not weighing you down and making you feel a

heavy and a bit boring. Like for summers, a black can feel quite heavy, intimidating and a bit flattening. But then I almost challenge you, have a look at some colours because I've got some coloured handbags in my wardrobe that I love. And they just, they make the outfit. So trust me on this. If you have a colour within your colour palette, then make sure you have a look at them and see which one you could adapt to have like in a handbag or a coat. If you don't know your colours, go and get my free colours guide. Now, I know I've mentioned my master class, which is next week. So sign up for that too. But in the meantime, head to lovingcolor.au forward slash find my colors. And that will give you a step by step guide as to finding whether you are warm or cool and

point you in the right direction as to which color palette you might be. And that will get you started on that direction. I hope that has helped Liz. And that was such a great question. Really enjoyed it. Okay. The next question is from Sky. And that is, how do I stop defaulting to black all the time? Okay, Sky, I totally understand it because black is such an easy color for so many people. Now, when I say easy, I'm more meaning what society has taught us that black is easy, that it's in all the shops, you know, everyone should have a black pair of pants or a black jacket or black pair of shoes or whatever.

It took me a long time to realize that black didn't suit me. Like, looking back, even for my gosh, this is going back away, even for my year 10, formal. I actually had red hair for my year 10 formal. I had copper hair. And I think because I had that bit more color and a bit more, I had a lot of makeup on to pull it off, but I had a lot of skin showing. And that's probably how I was able to pull it off. Is it my best color? No, absolutely not. When I wear black, I feel like death warmed up, all of the color drains from my face. It just does not work for me. But even back then, you know, you have that traditional, everyone needs a little black dress. And I'm back then, I really believed it because that's what you were taught. Black is slimming,

back as this, black is that. It doesn't work for everyone. It really doesn't. It drag some people really down and washes them out and then you start piling on makeup or then maybe you might even start changing your hair color because you think it's your hair color that's doing it. No, it's the colour black. Black is a very high contrast colour. It is a very harsh colour to wear. And on the right people, so I think I've mentioned it before, like my daughter is a deep autumn. On the right people, like even though she's a deep autumn, she can borrow from her sister palette, which is deep winter. Now, I know other people who are deep winters, sorry, who are deep autum, black doesn't do them any favours. That's because not everything in your sister palette is going to suit you.

They are much better in a really nice rich chocolate. However, for my daughter, she can wear black and she can wear all black. And when I mean all black, shoes, pants, top, coat, jacket. She can wear the lot and she can look phenomenal in it. And she doesn't need a huge amount of makeup. She literally has a bit of lip gloss on. She's not using foundation, a bit of mascara. She can pull it off and wear it and it gives her life.

Like, if you put her in a really soft gray, you'd lose her. Like she would go really pale, she would get completely lost, you would lose her and you'd lose all of her features, you put her in black and then suddenly they all start to come to life. So I'm not saying that black is bad for everybody. It's more that for 75% of people, which is people who aren't a winter, it just doesn't do you justice. So the way to stop defaulting to black, if you're wanting to look at neutrals, you need to start looking at what other neutrals you can wear. Again, looking at a quick test that you can do

at home that I've talked about before is doing warm versus cool, which is white versus cream. Cream suits you better. You're more likely to be warm toned. White suits you better than you're more likely to be cool toned, just as an example to give you. And then once you know that, you can, like I was talking about before, with Liz's question, you can start to think about the neutrals that you want to wear and then you can start moving away from black. An easy thing to delve into would be those chocolates and then it would also be like a navy and then it would be like a charcoal grey. Now depending on your colouring, some of the neutrals could still be too dark and intense

for you. So that does come into it as well. Obviously for those seasons that are more muted like soft autumn, soft summer, light spring, light summer, those palettes, if we wear really dark colours, especially from head to toe if we wear dark colours, it just overpowers us. It just makes us really flat. Whereas if you, say, a warm autumn, warm spring, that's where you'll find like your carkeys, your tans, your caramels, your chocolates, all of your mockers, all of those kinds of colours, your rusts start to be really lovely neutrals that you can lean towards. Now, if you're

In terms of stopping defaulting to black, maybe it's that you, when you put an outfit on, you only put a little bit of black on. It's more that you wear a black pair of shoes or you wear a black pair of pants or you wear a top that's black but then you put it with something that's a lighter color on the bottom, like a white or a cream or you're just mixing it up a little bit because I know how hard it is to default to black, but also think consciously when you're shopping from now on. And rather than looking at black, look at other colors that you can use instead, like some of the ones that I've mentioned, I think that could really help you in stopping to default to a color. Because when you say how do I stop defaulting to black all the time, the feeling that I get from that question, sky, is that you don't necessarily like wearing it.

It could be that you're bored by it and that that's all you wear or it could be that you wear it because you feel you have to. So I would even start to have a think of it from that perspective. why do you and ask these questions now you can write them down in a journal or just think about it why do you default to black all the time how do you feel when you wear it take a photo in front of natural light and see does it drain you and wash you out or does it give you life do you think that you can actually pull it off just start thinking about the reasons why is it because your wardrobe's so overwhelming that you don't know what goes with each other therefore black's easy or is it because you just have no idea what suits you so really just start

having a think about these things because then I think that will also help you to stop defaulting to black. So yeah, I hope that has helped. Black can be quite a controversial topic just because people are like, well, everyone suits black. And it's like, well, no, it doesn't. And people don't like it when I say that. And I get it. I really do. But I'm not going to stop saying it. I'm going to keep saying it that not everyone can wear black. A hundred percent, not everyone can wear black. So there are much better colors out there for you if black is not for you. Okay, next we have Naomi. And let me see in the color analysis questions, what have I got?

Oh, what's the difference between summer and winter colors? Fantastic question. Okay, so as we've just been talking about, summer and winter are both cool toned palettes. Within those color palettes, you then have three sub-seasons within each. Now, I think I've gone through these very briefly before, but let's go through it again. When we go into color analysis, there are, let's start again. There are, when we go into color analysis, just cut that other bit out. When we go into color analysis, you have seasons that are bold, vibrant, bright, highly saturated.

The colors haven't been mixed with very much. They're really quite true to what they are. Then you have other seasons that have had colors mixed into it to make it a different shade, a different tone. So whether that's a bit of white mixed in to make it light, whether that's a bit of grey mixed in to make it more muted and soft and delicate, whether it's had more black mixed into the colour to make it really deep and intense and sort of dramatic, those kinds of things, or whether it has had more yellow mixed into it to make it even more warm toned, or it's had more blue, purple mixed into it to make it more cool toned. So when we look specifically at summer and winter, winter is your high vibrancy, bold, dramatic, dual-toned colours. They are stunning. They are beautiful.

But the people who are winters who can wear them can really pull them off because some of them are quite intense colours. They are fantastic though. But that's what they are. They're bold, they're bright, they're highly saturated. And there's not, apart from deep winter that's had extra. are black mixed into it. There's not a huge amount of other colours that have been mixed in. Then you have the three sub-seasons within each. So in winter, you've got cool winter,

you have bright winter and then you have deep winter. Then when you go to summer, summer is whilst cool-toned, it is a much softer, delicate, lighter version of winter. It's had a lot of other white or grey mixed into it, or the same. saturation has been dialed right the way down. Like if you think of like a pastel highlighter compared to like one of those fluro highlighters, that's what I'm talking about. That's the difference between summer and winter. Summer would be the pastel one and winter would be the fluoro one.

So when you go into summer and you've got the seasons of soft summer, light summer and cool summer, cool summer is the most vibrant. It's the most intense out of all of the summer seasons. Whereas light summer has had a lot of white mixed into it. So they do really become your beautiful pastel colors, like pastel rainbow colors. And then you have soft summer, which has had grey mixed into them. And that just makes them a bit more delicate, a little bit more muted than the other two palettes. So they're the main differences between the seasons.

Now, the only seasons that are sister seasons within that are cool summer and cool winter. Now, that's because the first characteristic of needing coolness is the first thing that those people need. So if they're so cool toned that they need colors that have a lot more blue in them because they just run really, really cool, that's where they sit. And they don't go anywhere else within like the color spectrum. They sit in cool summer, cool winter, and that's where they sit. Whereas the other seasons, like soft summer, light summer, bright winter, bright winter, deep winter, they lean ever so slightly more neutral. They have less blue in them in the colors or less purple in them. And so because of that, their sister seasons actually then translate

into the warm seasons. For example, light summer's sister season is light spring. And the reason for that is the first characteristic that a person within those color palettes needs is lightness. The temperature comes second. The most important thing for them is that wearing lighter colors is what brings them to life first the most. So that's how that side works and that's the difference between summer and winter. Summers need a lot more light, lightness to them, not as bold, not dramatic, really beautiful colors, but just softer and a lot more toned down than what you would find in winter. Winter's that bright jewel, like think your emeralds and your cobalt blues and your hot pinks and your raspberry reds,

all of those kinds of colours are what you're going to find in winter. Compared to summer, you're going to find your lavenders, your lilacs, your cornflower blue, your candy kind of pink, your soft baby pink, your soft baby blue, your lemon. They're all the kinds of colours that you're going to find in summers. I hope that's helped Naomi distinguish between the two. I'd love to know if you think you're a summer or winter, actually. You should send me a DM if you listen to this and let me know. And then I think we've got time.

How are we doing for time? Yeah, we've got a few more minutes. So last question I will do is from Jenny. And I'm just going to scroll through. Let's see what I have got. I like this one. Okay. Jenny is, if I'm short on time,

what's the one thing I should focus on when getting dressed every day? These questions are fabulous. Keep them coming, ladies. Like, I love doing these kinds of episodes because I feel like I'm really genuinely helping you. Not that I don't feel like I'm genuinely helping you on other podcast episodes, but like some of those obviously I'm coming up with the ideas for them, whereas this is you specifically asking me questions.

Speaking of that, if you have a question for me, send me a DM to Loving Color double underscore on Instagram or send me an email to Ashley at Lovingcolor. Dot AU, and that's Color spelt with a U, so that I can answer it for you on future episodes because I like to do these once, I was going to say once every six to eight weeks, I think is a really good thing for me to answer all of these questions for you. And that also helps obviously with the weather either warming up or cooling down to. Okay. So if you're short on time, there's a few things actually that you should focus on when getting dressed. If you're in the morning struggling to know what to wear, one of the first things I would do, and I know,

I don't know if this is just because I'm a Virgo. I don't know if other people would do this. I don't know if other people would do this too. Just think about it the night before. I'm not saying that you have to plan out your, like a meal plan. You have to plan out your whole week of outfits, which I know some people do. I'm pretty sure David Beckham does something like that. He has like this rack in his room and he plans out his outfits for a week. I'm not saying do that necessarily, unless you want to. Think about it the night before. Like go, when you come into your room to start like your night routine of like taking off your makeup or brushing your teeth or having a shower, all that kind of thing, have a quick think without getting your brain started because I know what it's like for mums

when you're like, oh, start thinking about tomorrow and then your brain just takes off. No, I don't want you to do that. I just want you to think, am I working tomorrow? Do I need a workout outfit? Am I home? Am I meeting a friend for a coffee? Am I hanging out with the kids at a playground or a park? Have I got errands to do? That kind of thing. Do I need, am I working out in the morning first, then getting changed. So do I need my workout gear out already? I'll put that, do I want to stay in my active wear all day? Okay, great. How can I make that a little bit more of an outfit for the rest of the day? Or if I'm getting changed, okay, what am I going to get changed into? Then, obviously, if you've looked at the weather, have a look at the weather and see what the weather's going to be

like that day. And then from there, I want you to pick your outfit for the following day. when you're focusing on that, I want you to think about, all right, do I want to wear a dress? Do I want to wear pants and a top? Do I want to wear a skirt? Start there. That makes it really easy because then if you decide that you want to wear a dress, you know, you're just going to focus on your dresses and you can straightaway discount whether you're wearing pants and a top, like or jeans. You don't need to think about that. So say you choose a dress. Then it's like, okay, we're just in the start of spring. It's not overly warm. So I'm going to need to layer. I'm not going to wear anything strappy because I'm going to the office. Obviously, I'm just making stuff up here. So just go with me.

Okay. All your strappy dresses or really summery dresses, they're out to one side. I know I'm going in the office. So I'm not going to use anything super casual. I'm not going to go for my linen dresses because those linen dresses crush really easily. I don't want that. I've got client facing meetings. Fantastic. That narrows me down, for example, to four more dresses that I've got left in my wardrobe. What color do I fancy wearing tomorrow? And you know what? Because you know your colors. You're going to know that all of them suit you. Just saying. And then from there, you're going to choose your dress. Because you've chosen your dress, to save time in the morning, why not get your bra and knickers out as well? And then that's done. Fantastic. I know I need a certain

kind of bra to go underneath this dress. I'm going to choose that one. Great. Done. Okay. It's a little bit chilly. I'm going to need a cardigan, a wrap, or a blazer if I'm wearing it to work. Okay, what colors have I got? Which one suits this dress? Okay, I'm going to go with that one. Fantastic. Then from there, shoes, handbag. Done. That's how when you're short on time, you put an outfit together really, really quickly. And the focus, because you've got a wardrobe that works for you, I'm going to assume, Jenny, that you've got a wardrobe that works for you because if you have a wardrobe that doesn't work for you, this question's a whole different thing. And I think that that could be like a totally different podcast episode. But I'm assuming that your wardrobe works for you and that the cuts suit you and your body shape and you enjoy wearing. You're focusing on creating an outfit that you love to wear, that you will enjoy wearing. And that when you walk past yourself in a mirror, you're like, oh, I really like that today. It brings a smile to your face. That's what I want for you. So when you do that, you get up the next day, all of that is taken away from me. I mean, even the night before, you can even start to think, what lipstick color? Do I want to go for a

nude or a color? Sometimes it can just literally be that. No, I fancy going just for a nude color that is like everyday makeup, perfect done. So that when you're getting ready in the morning, and if you're like me, you have three teenagers constantly like Piccadilly Circus station, coming in and asking a thousand questions because they didn't get themselves organized the night before, even though I have tried to instill that in them. It means you're organized and you're out the door. Now, do I do this every day? I do not.

But it depends on what I'm doing. If it's on my work days, I try really hard to think about it the night before. Even if I haven't got the outfit out, I've planned it in my head. That is a way to do it and to focus on getting dressed. I want you to focus on outfits that bring you joy that you feel great in. that work for you that are in colours that you enjoy wearing. And like I said, Jenny, I'm thinking that your wardrobe is working for you because if it's not working for you, there's a lot of things before this that you would focus on first to get to your style of where you want it to be.

Well, look at that, 29 minutes and 40 seconds. I'm really impressed with myself because I can, as you know, I can ramble. But I hope this has been helpful today. I've absolutely loved recording this episode for you. Thank you so much for joining me. If you have, like I said, any questions, feel free to go to Instagram or go to Lovingcolor.com.A.U. There's also a form on there to contact me. You can use that too. And like I said, I'd love for you to join me next week on my masterclass of how to, for you to find your colours. So make sure you go to the show notes and go to and click on the link, Lovingcolor.coma.u forward slash find my colors masterclass so that you can join me next week and we can have a great chat about all things color analysis, style, makeup and just

bringing a bit more joy into your wardrobe. Anyway, take care. Have a fab week and I'll catch you on next week's episode. Thanks so much. Bye.