Life Uncut - 67. THERAPY THURSDAY - ASK UNCUT

Episode Date: October 9, 2020

Therapy Thursday lifers!Our short, sharp and sometimes sexy question session.We have one girl in a long term relationship that feels their sex Life isn’t enough.. should she leave?Where do single people meet these days and how do you meet them in the wild?And is it ok/should we be asking partners to get STI checks before sleeping with them....If you have a question for Life Uncut, slide on into our DM's on Instagram @lifeuncutpodcastHit subscribe, 5 stars and share the love. Because, well, we love love xSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. And I'm Brittany. And today is our second episode of the week. It is our quick down and dirty episode where we answer your deep, dark and burning questions. We're actually doing something a little bit different today. And how do you feel, Laura? Because we've gone rogue.

We are doing the podcast on my lounge. I have this really, really big lounge. We're sitting like a meter and a half away from each other. Our legs are curled up on the lounge. We've got cushions everywhere. We've never done it like this before. We're usually like crammed into a little table and I'm on your bed amongst all of your clothes. You're making this sound a lot bougier than what it is.

Guys, we're still budget. nothing has changed we're still not making enough money from this podcast we're gonna keep on doing it exactly how we've done it the whole time which is a mad dash to the finish line i'll stay up to midnight and probably edit this and then complain a few times to britney about it i'm out there hustling trying to wrangle some money if you guys are listening you want to sponsor the podcast slide on in oh wow i got desperate real quick didn't i um now i'm dying to know laura you just told me that something funny happened to you today but you won't tell me what because you want to do it live on the pod like this okay this is what we do whenever something interesting happens in our

life we don't actually tell each other until we sit down with a microphone in hand i don't know if it's funny it's traumatic today i had to go into the city to go and run into one of our jewelers who works with us and i ran in and i was like i'll just park in angel place like there's a car park there that i know it's a wilson car park it's multi-level car park right in the city and anyone knows like just driving into city that in and of itself is like a stressful ordeal so i parked the car and I parked on the lowest level of the car park so I got out and I went and did my thing and then I came back and I was waiting for the lift and I got into the lift this is a long story I'm here for it though then I got out and I got out at the wrong level so I was like in the car

park but I was at the wrong level I was at like basement two and I was actually meant to be at basement seven so I'm like oh I'll just go down the fire escape so I open the fire escape and the door shuts and i walked down a level and i was like i'll just try this door none of the doors worked none of them oh my god i was trapped in a pregnant woman waddling up and down like eight flights of stairs anyway eventually i figured out what level there was one level that had an emergency phone on it and i was like calling the guy finally picks up after 20 minutes and he's like hello and i was like i'm stuck in your fire exit thank god there was an emergency phone i was gonna be on the news this pregnant woman died in a fire it's like buck twice if

you're in milwaukee hang on my concern here okay no not my main concern my main concern is your welfare i'm glad you're okay no let's like break this down for a second this is a fire escape the whole purpose is you're supposed to be using it to escape a fire okay so the issue was is that i walked down to the bottom level and i was like that's where my car was and i was like okay i can't get out of here so then i walked back up as far as i could before i ran out of breath three stairs i didn't quite make it to the very top level which was like eight flights of stairs but everyone knows that like a car park stairwell it's really two flights to one flight so we're talking like 16 flights of stairs here so I didn't quite make it to the top level and then I was like

well maybe I'll just sit here for a while and see what happens that was a bad idea nothing happens so then I started walking again no one else is using the firewall so then I walked up further eventually found the phone and the guy on the phone was like you just need to keep walking up and then eventually you'll hit the street and the street exit you can exit from and I was like okay thanks for that pal but if just in case you don't hear from me I'm either still trapped in the stairwell or I've made it out alive like one of the two this is this is wrong on so many levels you know there was no signs either there wasn't a sign that said hey if you're stuck in the stairwell please proceed to the very top level and you can get out on pit street more you should have said

that I'm gonna write a letter can I turn into that angry pregnant woman who writes letters now well I mean I feel like this that you just called it out to all of Australia is more powerful than your letter, but you write that letter. Also, I want to point out guys, I know that a lot of you listened to the episode the other week where I said that I saw Zac Efron in Bondi. And I just want to reiterate that it fucking was Zac Efron because every single media outlet has now reported on it. Apparently he's moved to Dover Heights. And for a while there, I was like really second guessing myself. I was like, did I make that up? Did I like fantasize him into existence? Is he really in Bondi?

You did not tell me that you were having second doubts. You were like, yeah, babes, I saw him. And then your internal monologue's like, oh, was it him? I said it with such confidence. But anyway, he's actually here and I feel really privileged that our Little Life Uncut community were the very first people to know. I said to Laura, once she said that and we hung up our microphones for the night, I said, you realise what you've just done?

I was like, no one knows Zach's here. You have just outed him. He's here trying to go low-key under the radar and you have just outed him and all of a sudden the next day literally the next day it was in every news article every media outlet there were papped photos the poor guy got one secret day and then you fucked it up could you imagine being zach efron and some shitty d-list reality tv star fucks it up for you laura's like i'm gonna teach you for turning you back on me no one turns you back on me all right guys you know that this is our very quick episode for the week and what we do is we

answer the questions that you have been writing in for the week so we have three questions that we're going to answer for today's episode and we're going to jump straight into them because it's currently 6 30 and we need to get this episode done before the bachelorette starts tonight hells yeah we do i've been with my current partner for almost four years and recently i was talking with friends about how we met and i told them that i asked him before we had sex for the very first time if he had recently had an std check and if he was clean the looks they gave me and the questions they asked me made me feel really ashamed and I began to question my choices what are your guys thoughts on asking someone about STD checks prior to sleeping with someone is this normal am I that

weird because I won't sleep with someone without knowing if they're clean why do your friends think this is so weird that's what I want to know it depends on what kind of relationship you're having I think like I mean obviously if it's a one-night stand or something and you're just there for hangs and bangs protect yourself you may not get an honest answer anyway so like you can ask the question they're gonna say yes yeah you can ask the question i'm not gonna put my money on that that answer might be true so i think that you in and of yourself need to take whatever precautions you can but if you guys have been on a few dates and you're taking it slow and you know you've kind of hit the five date mark and you're gearing up for sexy times then i don't think that there's

anything wrong with asking someone if they've had an std check i actually kind of encourage it oh i think you definitely should i have a girlfriend a really good girlfriend who's a babe and like everyone wants to sleep with her but she has never and will never and she only just told me this last week she has never and will never sleep with anyone without them proving they've got they've had an STD check she gets they email her the results she has to have it in a hard copy she actually does it she um yeah she actually does it she's not shy about it either and she's I mean if the the off chances she's had a one-night stand in her life which she says she doesn't really like to do anyway she's like I don't imagine about you're about to have a one-night stand you're

like I'm really sorry we can't do this until you go to the doctors and then that's like the most prolonged one-night stand ever he then goes to the doctors three days later emails you then you're like cool let's resume where were you oh doggy style let's go well this only works for her because a she doesn't do one-night stands because for sex for her she wants to have some sort of connection to them and that's so fine like I totally get that b guys want to sleep with her enough that they're gonna go and do it they're gonna go and get the test and show and then she's like free for all because she doesn't want personally this girl doesn't want to use condoms when she has sex so she wants to know that she's got a connection with them and that they're clean and healthy and

I think you know what if that works for you go for it that is not going to work for everyone unfortunately I think she's a bit of a league of her own there I think like Laura said if you're gonna have a one-night stand use protection obviously of course you can ask them I ask for sure but I think I ask for my own peace of mind because they're not going to say oh yes I have herpes like they're not going to say it are they a guy that's about to sleep with someone I don't think he's going to be honest so that's something you need to keep in the back of your mind well I think there are some guys that are really honest like I genuinely do think I mean I know that I've been in a situation before where I was very close to having sex with someone and

they were very honest about what STIs they had and that kind of you know slowed things down tremendously you know we actually ended up dating for a really long time it's not that I think there's a lot of stigma around STIs that there doesn't need to be and we've talked about this before especially when we did the sex education podcast with um Juliet Allen there's so much stigma around STIs and we treat them as though like they're this really frightening thing to catch and I don't think that they majority of them are as frightening as what we make them out to be however do you want to catch something no should you protect yourself absolutely and so for you at the time it felt normal and comfortable in your relationship to ask and make sure that

they've had an STI check I think that that's totally normal and I think that there are a whole lot of women out there who would be asking before having sex hey when was last time you got checked I asked Matt good thing is when you do the bachelor you kind of have to that's actually one of the things that you have to prove that you've had done before you can go on the show you have to go and get an STI check yeah it's a prerequisite you have you do have to prove that you are sexually healthy yeah there's a full they give you like a full health and body check over I don't know what a body check over is what sort of check over did they give you I didn't get a full body check like man take off all of your clothes no so you have to do a full health check

I mean I don't know what the rules are these days but one of the health checks was that you have to get tested for a whole lot of different STIs yeah you get your you get your bloods done and they do the works yeah so look I think it's a totally normal thing to ask I don't think that your friends should be making you feel weird for it maybe they should be asking more often but also I recommend that everyone goes after each sexual partner you go and you get yourself checked because you just don't know otherwise and we have a real responsibility to be responsible when it comes to our own health and also our sexual partners responsibility be responsible that is true like what you did there okay question number two I feel like we got that yeah I just want to

reiterate that what laura said is absolutely true it's not the end of the world if you get an sti or if someone has an sti they're not all really really nasty there are some nasty ones a lot of them can be treated but having said that it is important that you go and get checked after you have had any new sexual encounters because while some of them can be quite harmless if left untreated for a prolonged period of time that's when they can get dangerous so like sure you've done it you're like whoops shouldn't have done that just go and get checked anyway it's not going to hurt just so this person that wrote in knows there's nothing to be embarrassed about don't let your friends make you feel embarrassed because you ask people about their sexual health if anything your friends

need to be doing it there we go all righty question number two question two I have been with my boyfriend for nearly three years he's the most amazing guy he treats me exactly how I want to be treated and he's my absolute best friend but the last few months to be honest nearly coming up to probably a year our sex life has been really really grim I am never in the mood and on the off chance that I am he's not am I just being lazy I feel like we've been together for such a long time I guess it's now normal to go without sex for two weeks but I can't help but wonder if it's normal for someone to have a high sex drive in a past relationship and in our first year to then go to happily going without sex for weeks at a time he's the most amazing guy i would be

crazy to let him go but something just doesn't seem right is it me is it him do i have a low sex drive and is it breakup worthy help i actually love this question because i think that so many people especially in long-term relationships go through these like ebbs and flows in how often they're having sex. And then when you're not having sex, quote unquote, like enough or compared to what you think other people are having sex, you then feel like, oh, there's something wrong with me. Even if you are completely satisfied, even if you and your partner are completely satisfied, there is still this comparison that exists. And I know loads of women who are in very long-term relationships who are not getting down and dirty three times a week, like they used

to. They're having sex once a fortnight and they are completely satisfied. They're completely happy with that their partners are also completely satisfied and therefore it is not a problem it's only a problem if it's a problem for you so if you feel like you're not having sex enough if you are wanting it and your needs are not being met then it becomes a problem but I think you know everybody is different and there are times in life where you go through these ebbs and flows of libido where your libido will be higher or lower Brittany's looking at me like no this is a fucking problem and I'm like Brittany you haven't been in a long long-term relationship for a really long time and I don't need reminding of that and I was like and don't tell me once a fortnight is not

enough because right now that's all I can do Laura Laura goes to me we like we just sat down to do the questions and Laura said what do you think about the the you know one sex every two weeks in a long-term relationship and I was like I just want you to think about what you just asked me I was like I mean like I haven't been in the experience for a long time I haven't been in the position for a long time but I do still have some thoughts on it look you are asking the fact that you're saying is this breakup worthy means in your mind it is a problem you aren't happy with it whilst you said you've got a low sex drive you're still highlighting the fact that it's an issue for you it's playing on your mind and you're like well is this is this the end do I need to

leave and find someone new no I don't think you do yet things like this do happen in relationships especially long-term relationships you just get super comfortable with each other and guys I have been in relationships for a total of 10 years just not for 10 years um so i know but it's it's sex is gonna die down and there's a multitude of reasons for that stress fatigue long distance contraception sometimes different medications you're taking there is there are so many reasons that you could be having a low sex drive if it's a continual problem you can go to your doctor you can go to a gp and you can literally say hey you got a low sex drive there's things that they can help you with there's things they can suggest you can work on as a couple that's definitely a route

you can take so don't be shy on doing that so many people do that it's just that not a lot of people speak about the fact that they do it but that's why we're here and I also think like I genuinely believe the more that you have it the more that you want it if I go x amount of time without sex it's the last thing I'm thinking about but if you get into a routine where you're having sex more often and then you're turned on more often and then of course you're going to want it more so I do definitely think that the more that you do it the more that you want it so no it's not lazy but maybe sometimes you need to try and do something a little bit different in order to kickstart that fire again because it's not just going to come and bite you in the ass out of no well maybe he

will come and bite you in the ass maybe that's what you need i don't think i don't think it's just going to like reignite i don't think your sex drive is just going to reappear you do have to try something different in order to try and kind of like kickstart that libido however i did some research into this i love that guys and by research i mean i googled so mama mia actually put out a study they did a survey of a thousand women which doesn't sound like that many women but i don't know a thousand women myself to ask so i'm like okay yeah this is a reasonable survey do we have any research from reliable journal peer-reviewed articles or just go with mama mia just gonna go with this is why i do the research no but this is like this is still a thousand women

were asked how often are you having sex and everybody said unanimously that they think you should be having sex three times a week I'm like three times a week sounds exhausting guys like I mean I'm pregnant and really tired but that's like a lot for me right now so I've I felt like far more reassured by these answers and okay the most common answer was once a week with 279 women saying once a week followed by twice a week with 194 women saying they have sex twice a week once a fortnight was the third most popular answer with 168 women and once a month with 157 women literally it came in fifth place those are having sex three times a week and they were mostly people who early early on in their relationships and people who had been in long-term relationships

were having sex once a week so this is them saying what they're actually doing at this current time or what they think should be happening at that point this is what they're actually doing what they think they should be doing is having sex three times a week but what they're actually doing is having sex once a week to once fortnight. Right. I'm not saying that it's great. I'm not saying that that's enough. I'm saying that everyone has different wants and needs, but if you are satisfied personally with having sex once a fortnight and it doesn't actually upset you, it's just that you think you're supposed to be having sex more. And the thought of that is where that inconsistency lies, then don't stress so much. It's only a number you can work on it. It's

not something that you need to break up with your boyfriend over. Agree. Also, you need to talk to boyfriend about it you didn't mention if you have done that yet if you haven't open communication always tell him or ask him what do you think about how often we're having sex what do you think about our sex life does it worry you do you want it more is it me that's not wanting it um what do you think we can do to change it have the conversation because you're in a long-term relationship you obviously love and trust each other these are the conversations you should be having laura is about to burst into laughter what are you laughing i'm laughing because like the other day i was matt and i were going for a walk and we were like i was like gosh it's so amazing

like we've been together for you know only for like three and a half years and like we're gonna have two children and like you know we live in a nice place together and like we've just accomplished so much and he goes yeah we've had sex like six times that's cliche fuck you but also like truth actually true no okay like look i know i make jokes about this guys when I'm not pregnant and feeling like the size of a house some it's so funny because during my first pregnancy I was like I am a beautiful goddess like I felt so sexy and we were like Matt had a full-on pregnancy fetish we were going at it like more during my last pregnancy than what we did when we first met and this time I feel disgusting like this pregnancy

is so different to the last one I feel hideous yeah my sex drive does not exist this time and it's completely different and laura knows i always tell the truth i look at laura and i'm like you are so beautiful you look so good pregnant like i wish you could see how other people see you i know that you feel gross because you feel sick and you feel like you're gonna vomit and you just feel like you're the size of a house but that is not what other people see i promise you has anyone seen the meme or like go and google this when you finish listening to this episode okay there's this like video that's on youtube and it's these two little scottish girls and they're trying to like video record a makeup tutorial and their mum comes in and she's like disgusting which one of

your fucking was it is disgusting that I hadn't flushed the toilet that is how I feel that is what I call myself all the time and I know that's really bad but every time every time Matt's trying to get sexy with me I'm like I'm disgusting now every time you hear the word disgusting that is what you guys will think of that was so random that was a long way to get there but when you were like that's how I feel I was like hang on you feel disgusting or you feel like a turd left in a toilet I was like which one is it I don't know if we answered that for you no I think we did all right um question three hey guys I have a question you touched on it a bit through the single pringle episode which was amazing and it's genuinely about where and how to meet single guys

these days I'm 28 I've been single for just over a year now I appreciate that COVID threw everyone off. But I know aside from COVID, it's so rare for me to meet men these days. I'm not one for super late night clubbing and big nights out. I've done that, been there and now I'm just over it. I've always felt I've never met great guys that way anyhow. Now, most of my friends are moving into relationships, settling down and a lot of them have actually met people through dating apps. The apps just haven't worked for me. I have lots of girlfriends that are tinderellas, but it's just not for me I don't work with any men my age and even places like the gym or restaurants is becoming so rare that genuine guys will just come and talk to me honestly

where the fuck are they Brittany this is your domain the reason I wanted to answer this is because I genuinely don't know I want to be really honest with this I haven't met I've met one guy actually in the wild in the last probably six months you know the dog guy that i dated oh yeah the dog guy literally met a guy on he met she met bondi dog guy yeah oh people gotta know who that is yeah people will know who it is guy that was walking up the promenade um and he had this really cute dog and he was super hot too and i was just like you know what yolo and i just started talking to him the dog was a good way in i started to pat the dog and play with the dog i'm gonna jump in on this story and hijack it for a second brit so brit had met this guy dog like dog guy dog bondi

guy patted his dog she'd left she'd then found him on instagram but like serendipitously found him on instagram she didn't go crazy stalk mode no she found him can i no i'm jumping in guys this was crazy i met this guy and i started talking to him and then when he walked off i was with my sister and a friend and we were like that guy was so hot why didn't any of us ask for his name or anything about him anyway I had put out to the universe I just I was like I need to know who that guy is that's what I said when I got home from my walk and opened up my phone I'm not kidding I follow this account and if you don't follow the account on Instagram you need to follow it hot dudes with dogs it's literally photos from all around the world of hot guys and their dogs

and I am not kidding this is literally half an hour after I met this guy and said to the universe i need to know who that guy is he popped up on my screen with his dog and i was like you're kidding me so this is where i come into the story so brit comes over to my house after she had just mortifyingly embarrassed me in front of my ex-boyfriend which hang on i didn't know i was embarrassing you i've told you guys that story before if you if you can remember it for anyone who's an og listener it's the whole park hall story where brit was like running around purposely in front of my ex-boyfriend down in Bondi beach. Anyway, long story short, she had done that. And then she's telling me the story about this dog guy that she now knows who he is. She's found

his Instagram and everything. But like, obviously she's like, how do I, how do I message him? Or like, he probably won't even know who I am or the fact that we met. So I was like, Hey, just show me your phone for a second. And then I liked about 15 photos of him without a shirt. Yeah. From 1987. yeah from 1987 she scrolled back she scrolled deep and i was i was mortified and then you can't like he would have got the notifications then he did because then he slid into her dms like five minutes later so really i was the one who set them up so as much as i'm that friend you don't want to have secretly you're happy that i'm there and then or do you remember the funny thing that happened after that we'll just keep going with this story we have not answered this

question this is funny this was I reckon this was one of the funniest moment that Laura Matt and I have ever had we were in hysterics the three of us are sitting on the lounge they've just hijacked my phone I think Matt had even commented on one of his photos from like five years ago I was like you're a bastard anyway give me my phone back and then we're so I snatched my phone back and I'm like I was mortified I was like you got you assholes you've gone you know you've ruined everything for me I've met this really hot guy like you're so fucking hot look at him and now you've gotten light photos from five years ago how am i ever going to like recover from this and then i looked down at my phone and i had no then the girls were like no then i had said i was

like babe just send him a photo of your badge it'll be fine this whole conversation played out whilst britney didn't realize but she was voice recording it the whole thing almost sent it was ready to press send and i and my thing you know when you can't take your finger off the button i was like oh my god how do i how do i swipe this down to delete if i let it i had this panic mode i had to keep my thumb on the phone for like an hour because i was like i don't know how to delete this voicemail just put your phone on airplane mode and then throw it in the ocean i panicked anyway okay so that didn't answer your question the answer to the question is is that britney has no fucking idea where to meet men no but the point of this was was look you can meet people in

the wild if you are open to it and putting yourself out there unfortunately they're not going to walk into your lounge room i know you said you're going to the gym and no one's talking to you but you have to just keep doing things you have to just keep meeting new people you're meeting because you might make a new friend and they might have a friend it's just it's just networking getting out there going for drinks with different kind of people in different crowds in different locations if you keep going to the same location with the same two people once a fortnight probably not going to happen for you I also think something that's really important is like you have to be proactive you have to flirt you have to go up and speak to people in the wild and I know that

that can be really intimidating I know that it's kind of a change in how things are normally done but there is a lot of success that comes from being the person to make the first move because guys are just as timid guys are just as scared of rejection as what girls are and I think because of online platforms it's made people even more fearful of doing things in the real in the real world so when you say like you go to the gym and no guy comes up to you like I could not tell you one time a guy has ever come up to me at the gym ever like have I approached guys at the gym yes yes I have it worked out okay she's very short period of time she's like do you need a spot literally I was like hey can you show me how to do that arm exercise with your big massive biceps

I do think it's important as women that we master the art of flirting and that we do feel confident enough to be able to go out and get what we want and we say this all the time I'm gonna say it again this it's so important because if you're not the one who's choosing a guy and choosing the type of person that you want to date then you're only being left with what's being offered to you and more often than not that's not going to be something that you're interested in so like have that confidence to go and make the first move and i know brit you're a massive advocate for it like you have no shame in going up to guys and talking to them but it works but the thing is um the the life really changed for me in so many ways when I stopped caring a what people think and what

people thought if I went and approached them and b if you don't actually care about the outcome so if you don't look put this pressure on yourself and don't overthink it don't look at them from across the room and be like what if he says no what if he throws a drink in my face what if you can't even think that because if he says no there's so many other people in the world and so like for example this guy that I saw on the promenade and in my mind I was like that guy's so much hotter than me but then I was like I don't care because I've got nothing to lose I ended up dating this guy for a couple of weeks like we forgot to tell that part of the story we ended up like becoming friends I ran into him the other day Laura I didn't tell you for that as well I

would I feel like I had a real like I played a real role in that relationship in that three-week relationship look it was probably closer to four it's the longest one I've had um but you just have to have this confidence and self-assurance in yourself to know that it's not the end of the world if it doesn't go well and you don't go and get married but also I can guarantee you if you go up and speak to a guy give him a compliment hit on him show interest he's going to be impressed he's going like it doesn't happen often so if you do go and approach him and give him a compliment he's going to be chuffed regardless of how it ends you're going to make his day you'll feel better in yourself and the more you do it the more comfortable you will be

doing it and I personally all my male friends all the people I've ever dated everyone has always said I would never have approached you I would have never started that conversation like we're only here because you came and started the conversation because guys unfortunately in this day and age aren't as proactive anymore for a multitude of reasons they're being babied by their mummies we've got online dating they don't have to work that hard they they lack confidence especially when you're in a group of women and this is another tip if you're in a big group of women out with all your friends the guy's not going to come and approach you he's definitely not going to approach you he may come and approach you when there's two of you and I know this

because I have asked so many men and they just that it's too intimidating it's too intimidating for a guy to come up to a girl when there's 10 other girls there in case he gets rejected he 100% has a greater fear of rejection than you do. I totally, totally agree. I do think, you know, if you're really, really wanting to meet new people, of course, like we say all the time, you could always do new things like, you know, start a new sport, join up to new clubs. Like you do have to change something about your normal day to day to be able to open your network up to new people. And also like your, your relationships or when you meet new people, it doesn't come from your friends, right? Like it's not going to come from like your best friend or the people that you

move in a circle with every day because those people you've already met their friends you already know their network it comes from like your loose ties so it comes from your friend's friend or it comes from the work colleague or it comes from those people that are in your circle who you know and you're friends with but who you don't know their extended circle so you do have to start doing things with people and I know that that can sometimes be a bit of a pain in the ass because like we all have very limited time but start expanding your friendship circle a little bit and start looking for those loose ties and those loose connections because that's where you're going to meet new people also I know what dating apps can be exhausting I know they can be hard

work and you can go through your lows with them and you you just hate them we delete them but I think it's really important not to give up on them because the fact of the matter is now I would love to actually know the odds but I don't know any single person that's not online dating like it's just mainstream it is the normal way to meet people now whether we like that or not do I like it no I detest it am I on them yes because that is where everyone I've seen I told you guys Channing Tatum's on there every famous person in the world that's single is on a dating app and I know that they're different dating apps to Bondi Hinge but the fact is the stigma's gone with dating apps it's what everyone does and it's how people meet I know heaps of people that have gotten

married from dating apps and had very successful stories so don't give up yeah and I also think with dating apps the problem is is like it is so two-dimensional like you don't get you don't get a look into someone's personality right and so you're basically you're only 100 judging it off their physical appearance in a photo which and I know that when you meet someone in a bar obviously it's based on their physical appearance as well but I think when you meet someone in real life or you see someone in real life there's there's a charisma and there's an aura that goes with that person as well which you don't see in a photo and you can't feel that in a photo so I think that the photos are even more two-dimensional but I do think and I agree with you that pretty much every single

person is online dating you know they might not be active every single day but most people have a profile so we can't just blanket wash it and be like online dating sucks I'm never going to meet anyone it's been shit shit I think you also have to open up your network and date people who aren't necessarily on paper your exact type that can be a really annoying thing for people to say because you're like well I'm not going to date someone who I'm not attracted to but you're not going to know if you're attracted to them or not unless you give someone a chance I was speaking to my friend yesterday um you know Jackson Garlick he was on Bachelor in Paradise with me and he was on name dropping right now we had we're still really good friends we chat and we were chatting and we

were just telling each other about some funny because he's online as well dating everyone is we were talking to each other about some funny stories and he just said something that really stuck with me and I think it's good advice but he just said in like a throwaway comment he's like man you just can't get online and swipe if you're in a bad mood and I'm like what do you mean he's like just don't fucking do it he's like if you're in a bad mood don't go onto your dating app because if you're in a bad mood don't go onto your dating app because it's never going to end well you are not going to give any banter you every little thing that someone does that might piss you off will piss you off you'll be mad they'll say the wrong thing he's like that is

he's like that's his greatest bit of advice if you're having a shit day don't do it but also I guess not even if they're doing something that pisses you off or or like if you just genuinely don't match with anyone or you don't see anyone on there it's even more deflating like you feel even more like oh yeah here's the reinforcement that there's nothing online and I'm never going to meet anyone like I mean I think it's important to have online dating as a backup and that you know obviously there's so many success stories that come out of it but being proactive in real life you know actually going approaching people flirting doing all the things that takes a lot of confidence to do I think that they're all really important steps as well in meeting someone

if that's what you really want just don't give up well that's it guys you know that this is always short and sharp we I had a lot of fun doing that I think we definitely went rogue we threw in some stories we didn't know we were going to tell but hey that's what life uncuts about guys thank you to every single person who sent in a question for ask uncut we get so many questions sent to us and i just want to i just want to apologize because it's not physically possible for us to get back to every single person we really we do read as many of the messages as we physically can that come through our inbox and we really do try and pick out the questions that we think are going to be most relatable to as many people as possible but just know that if you do have a question or

you have something that you want to put out and you really want answers to we always have the facebook group there as well where you can put your ask uncut questions up or if you want to be done anonymously you can send them to us and we will post them onto the facebook group it's life uncut podcast and then you'll not only have us answer your questions but you'll also have the wealth of an amazing community jumping on board being supportive and answering and giving their advice as well so that's always another option so yeah keep the questions coming we will be back next week next tuesday for another episode of life on cart because you literally cannot escape us now especially if you've subscribed we're just going to keep on falling into your inbox

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