Life Uncut - ASK UNCUT - Help!! Missing his ding-a-ling, unlikely soulmates, I love you.... but get out of my house

Episode Date: August 18, 2021

Your free Therapy Thursday session, where we answer your deep dark and burning questions except today, producer Keeshia is stepping up to the mic and doing her best to give you her equally unqualified advice! - I got out of a serious relationship 12 months ago. We had great chemistry and even better sex. I've found that since we broke up, sex just doesn't compare with anyone else or I am comparing it to my last partner. So I am finding sex isn't as enjoyable and I don't feel a spark. Help! -I’ve been in a ‘friends-with-benefits’ situationship for 10 years and I think he is my soulmate. I’m scared I could lose everything but I want us to be in a proper relationship. -I live with my friend and we aren’t living well together! We just aren’t compatible. How do I get her to move out without losing our friendship? Lifers keep those questions rolling in! Slide on in to the DM's @lifeuncutpodcast and then sit back and enjoy the therapy session.Remember, tell you mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friends and share the love, because, well, we love love xSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut, Ask Uncut. This is our Thursday edition where you write in your biggest problems and we try our best to answer them. I'm Brittany. And I'm producer Keisha, filling in for Laura today. Psych! We are mixing it up a little bit. Laura is unfortunately, look, Laura has two little kids, as we all know, that are a little

bit under the weather. So she had to pass the baton to producer Keisha today. Do we have to call you producer Keisha every time we say your name? Or can we just call you Keisha? I kind of hope not. This was brought up in our Facebook discussion group, actually. they said you'll never go under any other name other than producer Keisha from now on and I said I actually wrote back and said look I've been called worse so that's fine you're like if that's

what that is all you guys have got I will take it but I think I think look I think when we introduced you to the world to the life uncut world it had to be producer Keisha because we had to give it enough time for everyone to know who you were get the sound of your voice know your role I feel like now we've almost established the fact that you are just Keisha. What do you think? Well, I think it's the same for Matt. When he does the Batch Uncut episodes, he's like, I'm not Maddie J to everyone anymore. I'm just Matt. I think it depends on what you guys want. What do you want, Keisha? Have we asked you, do you want to be producer Keisha? Do you want to be Keisha? Do you want to be Keish? Do you want to be the girl that's taken over my life, living in my home and

sometimes is me on the podcast? Do you want to be identity theft? Okay, well, I'll let you in on that while Britt is away overseas I am living in her apartment and I actually have a really funny story about this to tell you that I haven't told you yet it only happened last night. Oh you found my secret stash of dildos didn't you? It's way too close. It was only a matter of time. So this might be a little bit too meta it might be a little bit too insular about us and how close we are but brit and i actually have the same birthday and it's coming up it is crazy yeah it's really interesting when we found this out so right now i am so much brit 2.0 that i'm living in your house i have the same birthday as you i've got a terrible dating life i'm just you a couple years ago yeah

and then i see like photos of you with laura and the kids and man i'm like this is so weird i was like you literally have slotted into my life and then when you are on the podcast as well i'm like I don't know. Am I being like slowly booted out? I don't know. I'm going to come home and all the locks on my house are going to be changed. Well, this thing happened last night. So our birthday is coming up in a couple of days and I got a message from my sister-in-law yesterday who I love so much. She's just the best. And she sent me a message saying, hey, I've got a package coming for you for your birthday. It's up to you whether you open it. It's going to get there ahead of time. So you can either wait to open it or you can open it and, you know, just a couple of days

early so this package one of the neighbors must have put it at the very front of the door they're good like that they look after me it's so good so I've opened the door and I've got this package and it was really non-descript packaging it was just like a cardboard box basically again another delivery of dildos I was like woohoo my birthday present is here anyway I've opened it up and it was this beautiful lingerie like absolutely gorgeous and I was like okay um your sister-in-law sent you lingerie maybe a little weird it's gorgeous it's absolutely beautiful firstly don't know how she guessed my size but is this like hang on is this like sexy lingerie or is this like it was like sexy sexy lingerie and so I've called her to be like thank you so much this

is so generous to be fair there was a couple of pieces in there and I was like the monetary value of this is very excessive this is a super generous gift generous sexy and I've called I've called her to be like thanks so much for thinking about me putting this on and my non-sex life my very single lockdown life and she was like what are you talking about I didn't send lingerie and I was kind of like what is happening in this situation anyway Brit turns out you have a package of really sexy lingerie and good for you I haven't tried it on yet it finally came I actually this is so funny I'm so stoked it finally came I ordered this like sexy lingerie before I left because obviously I was gonna bring it overseas to see Jordan I was gonna be like

surprise I'm a sexy little minx you know you've got to keep him excited and it didn't come and I just thought it got lost somewhere so it's finally arrived it's finally arrived and lucky for you we're not the same bra size otherwise I would be taking that your boobies are way bigger well I have a question for you I saw something on the news and I need you to be really honest with me speaking of sexy time and your sex life I saw an article on the news it happened in Bondi it happened on the walk that I did every day it happens on the coastal walk that you do every day I saw a couple at 8 30 a.m getting it on they were going to pound town on the rocks on the cliffs of Bondi beach and someone's taking a photo of it and been like well technically there's two

of them they're not breaking the rules and there's no one within two meters of them Keisha and you know what it's exercise and it's it's classified as exercise so producer Keisha was that or was that not you on the cliff going to pound town in my lingerie yeah well I mean I needed to test it out right like no I can confirm it was not me but those photos were so funny and I love how much they probably thought that they were safe because they're like really far down the cliff face I don't know how they got down there I don't really know the pathways around there but people fly their drones off of that cliff and get beautiful photos of the coast and so it's a drone that has captured this image and these people just must be absolutely pissing themselves laughing being like

we filmed a porn without meaning to it's so fun i actually know the part that they're on so it is it's pretty easy to get to if you want to it's around a little cliff corner but a lot of people including myself go to those areas just to like sit on your own and chill out people meditate people go and read their books there people watch the sunset there i've never seen anybody go to fuck there but I'm just wondering is this like a common sex place is this a common place that people go and we've only just discovered it thanks to technology like drones I think that maybe this is just a really really successful hinge date I mean you can only go on walking dates at the moment you're not allowed to go to each other's houses and maybe they just clicked over their

morning walk and they were like you know what I want to know what was in that coffee have you have you had sex outside or like ever been caught anywhere and I'm really throwing this on you now because we didn't talk about this the look on your face says yes if I was American right now I would be like I would like to plead the fifth please uh yeah look definitely have not going to disclose where but I haven't been caught have you been caught no god no I I'm no I'm very discreet look I say that I don't actually have sex in public places so when I say I'm being discreet it's because it doesn't happen but I would like to think that if I did it I wouldn't be caught but I would love to hear people's stories if you guys have had sex somewhere in public and you've

been caught please tell us because this stuff is so juicy and it makes me lol so hard and like there's a difference between you going and secretly having sex on a really secluded beach or in a bush or something that no one's around a dusk or whatever super romantic to go in and like having sex on the steps of a church or something like you know when I say go and have sex in public it's like you pick your place people pick your place look actually Brie I wanted to ask you something about something that I saw in the news because I think this is it's a conversation that I think most people will have had with their friends and I think even you and I have had it together but there's an additional element to it that I'm curious about J-Lo who previously four months ago

she was engaged to A-Rod obviously they broke up they were together for a couple of years She is now back in the Bennifer situation with Ben Affleck, which, quite frankly, I am absolutely living for. But in the past week, she's actually done something that I think a lot of people question whether they're going to do or not, and she's deleted every photo of A-Rod off of her Instagram. Here is where it gets a little bit more interesting, though. Some of the photos that she has deleted include her performing

at the President's inauguration. This is Joe Biden's inauguration. she performed there and there were photos of her with joe biden and a rod for people like her like that is a life goal is to perform at an inauguration it's a massive honor and it's something that i think they would hold really really dear to their heart that they got to do that oh that is a huge moment like if that happened to me that would be on my gram for the rest of my life that would be on my fridge i would print that out and put it on a magnet on my fridge like that that shit stays forever for your Christmas card you just cross everyone's face and keep sending it around being

like look at what I got I would use that as my save the date if I was marrying someone else like these are the stuff that you keep forever yeah I mean it made me think I have photos with an ex at one of my graduations and I haven't deleted them I mean that being said it was quite an amicable breakup and I still think of him as a great person so when I look at those photos I'm like oh that was my graduation look at me in my hat and my gown I don't know what do you think like not only do you delete photos of an ex I think you can you know a lot of most people would at least archive the really romantic ones but what happens if they happen at really important moments of your life yeah so we've touched on this a few times and I do have different opinions on it

first I want to break down JLo and like guys just in case you're wondering no this question didn't coming directly from J-Lo. This wasn't an ask I'm cut from J-Lo. She's our number one listener though. Like shout out J-Lo. We love you. Thanks so much for the support. Appreciate it. But I am surprised by this and I would love to know why. Obviously something big has happened, but I feel like there are two options. And when I think about when this has happened to me in the past, no, I haven't performed at a president's inauguration, but when I think of this situation in the past, there's been two major reasons one is that the ex has done something horrific or maybe she's just found out that it's happened so maybe she's only just found out or confirmed that a rod did a lot

of sneaky stuff because there have been rumors they've been together for years there have always been rumors that he's been cheating it was never really confirmed as far as i know i think it was always just like this speculation so either that has been confirmed and she's just gone a big fuck you or Ben the new lover new slash old reignited lover is a little bit jealous and he's a little bit insecure and he has asked her to delete part of his past now that is what has happened to me and I don't like that so if it's option two and Ben has been like go and delete everything about him I don't like that one of my partners did that to me with my ex I was with my partner for eight years like you just said we had graduations we bought houses we had very big we

had traveled the world we had a lot like we had a life together for eight years and he was like delete everything I don't want you to have any photo that had anything to do with him and I just put my foot down and I said no absolutely not I'm not keeping these photos because of him but I'm keeping them because it's you're asking me to delete eight years of my life my whole adulthood and it's just not on and I think in that sense it's okay I think it's okay to delete photos where maybe you and your ex are macking on or very sexual or like you know you're kissing and it's like I love you forever post okay sure you can archive that shit but if you're at the president's inauguration a really big moment I don't think you need to delete that from a jealous new partner

what do you think well I think that I have been in this situation actually where my most recent ex-boyfriend I remember seeing a photo of him with his ex they were actually at the snow and it's the way that he looked at her in this photo like he can just tell how much he loved her and it's this particular photo that I was like never looked at me like that before was that your boyfriend and you were making him delete photos of I didn't make him delete anything I didn't even bring it up I didn't mention how much this photo bothered me but it cut deep I would absolutely be lying if I didn't say that that particular photo really bothered me they had other photos together where they were in groups of people or whatever but I think he deleted them himself I think he deleted them without me

really saying anything so maybe he kind of looked back on them and and thought the same thing i'm not sure i think it's a really i do think what you said about it being depending on what happened in the relationship that is a massive factor i do have another question regarding that i feel bad saying this and i hope it's real i don't know if i believe jen and ben yet i don't know if it's a publicity thing again i need them to be together for a little bit longer i need some more photos i need some more videos maybe until i can know if i believe the relationship but you know like celebrities date like this all the time for publicity they literally i know i will never say their name i know a very very very big celebrity very big that had a completely fake

relationship and i know the inside you cannot do this to us who is it give us a hint i can't i can't but my point is i was gobsmacked when i found out that it was like their publicist called the other publicist and they're like look this person needs to be seen dating someone that's wholesome and and good for them can we g this up isn't that how kim kardashian and chris humphries started i don't know but it's it's actually quite prevalent so until i see a little bit more from jen and ben i'm just sitting on the fence and you know this shit where they're on the boat and they're recreating their old photo from the film clip like i'm i'm sorry it's just a bit like dangling a carrot a little bit oh see i'm munching on that carrot like i i'm almost at the point where

I don't even care if it's fake. I'm like, thank you for just giving me something other than COVID to think about. Totally. This is a nostalgic moment that I'm just living for. I'm still lucky holding my breath for Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt, but I think I'll be holding my breath for a long time. Anyway, should we be getting into the questions? And I actually have an accidentally unfiltered that allegedly may or may not have happened to a friend of mine. So guys, we're doing the accidentally unfiltered today on Thursday's episode because we did give them a miss on Tuesday's episode. We just didn't think it was the right fit for that episode. So Keisha, kick it off with your accidentally unfiltered. This one isn't necessarily embarrassing

for me, but it's so funny that I had to share. I work in a salon that is on the second floor of a building and underneath us is a sex shop. We had a problem with our water pipes and so we called our regular plumber out to fix the plumbing one night. So he came after hours so that it wouldn't interrupt you know our business somehow he burst a pipe and he flooded the sex shop beneath us to make up for it he had to buy three thousand dollars worth of dildos that he ruined i cannot imagine what he would have had to say to his partner when he took them all home you know what they say he broke it you bought it and he bought 300 dildos 300 3000 i mean three thousand worth of dildos surely there is some sort of insurance on that or otherwise he's got a dildo

fetish and he's got a great imagination he made that story up to cover to his wife why he bought 3 000 dildos oh look as long as she's pleasured you know i'm sure between all of those dildos she's going to find the one that's right for her i've got one that i think is it's so short and sweet and i just was laughing so hard every time i read these for the first time i just picture myself in the situation and I think like immediately regretted doing that in this guys I have never told anyone this because I just really felt violated a little while ago I was being a really impatient little bitch yelling at my mum to hurry up because we were supposed to be heading out I waited and I waited until it was all just too much so I ran up the stairs and burst the

door open to see what was taking so long and to my disgust I saw my dad helicoptering his penis in front of my mom's face we need a gofundme page for her therapy that is cool i need my memory erased i just love that you just think that the old helicopter maneuver you think it's like 17 to 25 maybe i feel like you feel like there's a cap on the helicopter move like imagine imagine your 60 year old dad and i like dad i know that you listen my dad i know big tony you listen to every episode of this i know you're listening please tell me you don't helicopter mom shout out to tony and j-lo our two main listeners our two biggest listeners but dad don't don't do any helicopters maybe be a bit more original you make up another maneuver oh my gosh this poor girl i

can't even imagine i'm so sorry for you that's all i've got to say all right should we get into some questions yes do you want to bring the first one sounds good hey girls i'm a throw down a serious problem I got out of a serious relationship 12 months ago with my first serious boyfriend we had great chemistry and even better sex I found that since we broke up sex just doesn't compare with anyone else or I am comparing it to my last partner so I am finding that sex isn't as enjoyable and I really don't feel a spark do you have any advice oh I feel like this is actually so common so common and the first thing that comes to my head is when you're in a relationship with someone you know them so well you know each other's bodies you know what each other likes you know what you

like they know what you like it's not often that you're in a long-term relationship and you have bad sex well i mean like oh god i hope not if you guys are in a long-term relationship you're having bad sex you need to communicate more or go buy one of the 3 000 dildos off old mate but i think that i think that this is really normal so you've known each other so well you know what works and you're comfortable and i think comfort is a really big thing in sex if you're comfortable with someone you're uninhibited you're not self-conscious sex is great then you you're obviously not in a relationship now you're possibly having one night stands or very casual flings or situationships it's definitely harder to build up that chemistry again it takes a little

bit of time that or you could be just really emotionally still hung up on your ex-partner thoughts producer Keisha well firstly my first thought is that this is such a relatable situation for me so I really really understand how she feels and I very much agree with what you said about you know it can be because of the connection the guy on the cliff wasn't good for you yeah like the guy on bondo cliffs I mean it was just a written beat and I think that when you do when you are comfortable with each other there's definitely that added layer but what I really think is so hard is to get that spark with someone and I think it often can be because you're a little bit emotionally unavailable you know you're not really investing as much of your

emotion into a sexual exchange because you're probably still quite hurt from your last relationship breaking down and so the advice that I kind of have is to not put the pressure on yourself to have that spark with people because the more pressure that you're going to put on yourself of like oh this just isn't as good with this person or this oh I'm just not feeling it as much with this person you can't expect yourself to that being in your mind is probably contributing to it not being as enjoyable as it could be as well yeah and I do love this saying comparison is a thief of joy and it really is if you're constantly comparing and I say this in relation to anyone just dating not sex but dating kissing texting the what you guys talk about what you do

on the weekends a whole relationship you just can't compare anything to something you've already had especially something you've had that was long-term serious and full of love because nothing is ever going to be the same and if you're sitting here in your current day in your present day and you're holding on and comparing this poor person you're with to someone else it's never going to end well it's never because they will never be that person but if you let it go and just explore who this person is chances are you could develop something new that is just as amazing as your last relationship it'll be different but that doesn't mean it can't be just as good and I also think that as I've gotten a little bit older and experienced a couple of different people I think one thing that I have

actually learned is that even if it is your first time hooking up with someone it's okay to actually tell them what you do like and I think that that can lead to them feeling a little bit more open with you you don't have to be like hey I want you to do this to me you can just say oh I actually really like it when you do that can you keep doing that you know it can be quite in quite a positive way and I think that or you just grab their hair and push their head down and I think that by doing that you might potentially enjoy what you're getting a little bit more it probably won't ever feel as good as with someone that you love or that you've been in a long-term relationship with but it hopefully can be a little bit better so that you're finding it more enjoyable yeah so

maybe just figure out if you still have some sort of feelings for your ex or you haven't emotionally let go or you haven't completely moved on or if you're still just comparing everyone else you meet to them I think once you let go of that chapter the next chapter can open and it can be super amazing all right I'm going to move on to the next question okay guys it's a little bit longer i don't know if this one's it is relatable but this is like extreme okay i have a dilemma and i need you girls to unpack it i've been in a friends with benefits type situation for wait for it 10 years i'm 27 for context i know 10 years so she's been in a friends with benefits from 17 to 27 so her whole adult life we met at our first jobs and have been on and

off ever since he's had other proper relationships during this time i've seen other people too but we always seem to come back to each other there is a spark there that is unlike anything I felt with anyone else and I know he feels it too we've spoken about it and we've spoken about us possibly developing into something more but the problem is we never seem to make it any further anytime we seem to get close he pulls back or maybe I do I actually don't know basically I just don't know what the fuck to do and where to go from here I've tried to tell him we need to end it but he seems reluctant to let go and I don't think I'm capable of cutting an off cold turkey on my own. I think as lame as this sounds deep down that we are soulmates but if it's not going anywhere am I

just sabotaging my own prospects? P.S. he's had a history of lying to me in the past about seeing other people and I'm not sure if I fully trust him but he's promised to be open with me. If it was a short-term situationship this would be different but this is 10 years with someone I've always felt is my soulmate help oh girlfriend that that's a hard situation because by the sounds of it you seem pretty emotionally invested in him and I think that you'd be lying to yourself if you didn't wish that those feelings were reciprocated but it does sound a little bit like you guys could be a square peg in a round hole I mean if you've been that close for so long for 10 years and you're like sexually compatible and you haven't been able to make

at work that kind of makes me go well have you actually examined why the two of you wouldn't work obviously there's an exception to the rule and an exception to what I'm about to say but I think when you have been with someone on and off for 10 years you you know each other inside out you have had the relationship without having a relationship 99% of the time there's a reason that that hasn't developed into a relationship after 10 years because something is probably just not right or something is missing now it's very obvious that you two care about each other you probably love each other whether it's in a friendship way or you can love someone and they're not right for you but I think that after 10 years you are obviously very invested in him

you are 100% even if it's subconsciously you are limiting what you are opening yourself up to you're limiting yourself meeting other people that could potentially be your soulmate I do think we have more than one soulmate in this world I think there are more than one person in this whole world that is right for you I think people come and go for different reasons at different times when you need them but I just feel like even if you don't think you are you would not be opening yourself up to potentially some super amazing people and some super amazing experiences because you're holding on to this person that you think is your soulmate if you guys haven't given it a go yet why what is a reason and if you don't feel like you can go to him after 10 years and say I fucking love you

like do you love me back do you want to have a relationship with me if you don't feel like after 10 years of doing this you can go to him and say that then something is 100% missing and I'm going to say it's probably time to move on yeah and I think that the fact he's lied to you previously about people that he's been seeing he's obviously done that because he's wanted to protect your feelings in that essence I think he would have to acknowledge the fact that there are feelings there probably both ways so I guess maybe you could you could actually just put it to him and say hey I'm actually at a crossroads right now we're at a fork in the road we've been doing this for 10 years and I need to know what you want to do do you want to give this a go or I need to move

on with my life like I can't keep on holding on to the possibility of what we could be because it doesn't seem to ever eventuate yep I think that's the only thing to do be really honest and I think you owe that to yourself and you owe that to him and he owes you the truth as well sit down and tell him exactly how you feel tell him exactly what you want and ask if it's reciprocated if it's not then I don't think unless unless you're happy to continue this friends with benefits if you're not going to be together properly in a relationship and you continue the friends with benefits you have to know that you are literally filling a space until one of you moves on and find someone and if you're that invested in him chances are and it sucks but it

could be him meaning you are just holding your breath waiting hoping he changes his mind and feels something for you until he finds someone and then imagine how gut-wrenching that will feel so I think sit down and have the conversation be super honest and there is nothing wrong with unrequited love and I think unrequited love gets a really bad name. If you're in love with someone and they're not in love with you the same way, I think people take that the wrong way. People take that like they're a loser and they've failed and how embarrassing, but I think it's beautiful. I have told people I love them before and I've been so invested and obsessed and they have literally said to me, I care about you and I don't feel what you feel. And I think that's fine. I think

that's you know you're always going to love someone or feel something for someone and they don't feel it back i think everyone in this life at some point will go through that situation and i think hats off to you for being brave enough to speak your truth also if you do get to that point and he's like no i don't want anything you walking away will probably be the most attractive thing in the world to him so like expect that you will be bombarded with texts and calls as soon as you do that wait I changed my mind okay fine as if they all don't do that it takes them like a week or so and they're like oh my gosh I miss this person so much what have I done guys they just they think in different ways to how we do yeah and I'm sorry it's a really sucky situation and

I hope I'm wrong I hope that you go and tell him how you feel and he turns around and says he feels the same way and I want you guys to have like a happy ever after because imagine how beautiful that would be but all you can do in this situation is be honest you've been watching too many Hollywood rom-coms I think oh I'm a sucker for a rom-com honestly I'm like please get please fucking someone get their happy ending all right third question one of my best friends moved in with me and I'm struggling to live with her we have completely different outlooks on life and I'm finding her really negative and sensitive in the house she's dismissive and it's gotten to the point where I dread the thought of her coming home and then when she does get home I get irritated

really easily. She doesn't really help with the cooking or the cleaning. I want her to move out and I just want to get a random person to move in because I don't really want to risk this situation with another friend. I would really like to keep our friendship alive though. And I just don't think that we live very well together. How do I get her to move out without ruining our friendship? This is tricky. I've actually been in this exact situation before in my life. Oh, do tell. It's a really hard situation to be in and I really can relate to how the awkwardness you know there's this tension you feel like you're in your home walking on eggshells because you don't really want to talk about it yeah it's a very awkward situation my advice to this person that has

written this in is that firstly if you're feeling this way it is super likely that the other person in this situation is feeling a really similar way and that's what I didn't realize when I was in this situation I moved into a house and the girl and I became really really really good friends and I was in a town where I didn't know very many people so she was one of the only friends that I had there and after a couple of months of living together we kind of just realized that we weren't really compatible as housemates I think that what both of us wanted out of a living situation was quite different and so for me it was you know she was one of my only friends there and I really didn't want to lose her as a friend but I could see that as time was going on we were starting

to get a little bit agitated with each other and it was causing quite a lot of tension in the house what ended up happening is that she actually was the better person and she sent me a message at one point and she was like hey Keish I'm better than you so like I'm a morally superior person no she absolutely was not like that she sent me a text and she said hey look I think I need to address the elephant in the room I think we need to talk about our living situation when are you free to sit down and have a chat about this and at the time I was like this is the most fucking awkward situation of my entire life I do not want to be here this is just awful like just let me sink into the ground a hundred percent we ended up sitting down that evening and we

we spoke about we basically just said I don't think we're compatible living together I really value your friendship and she said I don't want you to feel as though you're being kicked out of the house like I love you as a person as a friend I agree I just don't think that we wanted the same things out of this situation and she said so there's no rush for you to move out I just wanted you know I want you to know that take your time find the right place to go to and still to this day we are really good friends and I'm so glad that she stepped up and was kind of like let's have this difficult conversation because I don't know if I had that in me I think I would have been just far too awkward and I would have made up some excuse to be like oh I need to move out for this

weird reason or this whatever is happening I'm 100% the same I would have made up something I would be like oh I got a job in Alaska I better go I probably would have moved to Alaska to avoid the confrontation yes so basically that is the advice that I would give I would give you the advice of exactly what she did I know how awkward it is because I was in the situation but it really did make sure that we were able to keep our friendship and we're still really good friends so and I love her and I value her friendship so much it's just the reality is is that people don't always live well together we actually get a lot of this I'm so I'm not surprised by hearing it we have a lot of people writing saying they have this situation where they've moved in with a friend or

not even a friend they moved in with a random the random became a friend and then they've decided they don't work together a lot of people are really awkward about it and don't know what to do and I'm not surprised it's a really awkward situation because nobody wants to hurt anyone's feelings ever but I think if you value the friendship more which in your situation Keisha obviously your friend did and you did as well I think the best thing you can do is just have a sit down like you said be really honest and you don't have to say why you don't like them living together you don't have to be like you know because you fucking leave your undies on the lounge you don't have to you don't have to say why or make anyone feel bad you just have to say

I think for the friendship I want to maintain this friendship it's so important to me and really reiterate how important the friendship is the only thing that I'm going to say that's tricky at the moment is in this situation with lockdown and COVID it's pretty hard to have that conversation and tell someone you don't want them to live with you because they might not have anywhere to go right now. So just be a little bit sensitive of the timing. And I think one thing that I can advise is take some responsibility of the things,

even if you don't think that, like if you think you're the best housemate that anyone could ever possibly ask for. You're not, you're delirious. Definitely don't say that. Yeah, like go in kind of saying, I understand that my working hours might be really hard for you to live with.

I understand that maybe this is something I do that's not that great so that they don't feel like you're attacking them and they don't feel as though they're they've done wrong in this situation because at the end of the day they will probably live very happily with somebody else you know it's just that the two of you aren't compatible and like Britt said I think reiterate that you really want your friendship if not make up some random excuse and you'll probably have to move out too guys that is it from us producer Keisha or Keisha or Keish or Brittany impersonator whatever you want to call it thank you so much for stepping up to the plate with 10 minutes notice today because Laura just couldn't make it we absolutely love having you on here and now

you've got to go and edit it if you're hearing this and you're like wow Keisha's really shit on the microphone it's actually double shit because I also edit it you are you are not you were fantastic and that was a lot of fun and please just wear my lingerie if you want just make sure you watch it before I get back you know the drill if you love the podcast share it with someone that you also love tell your mom tell your dad tell your friend tell your dog what's the last one tell your mom tell your dad tell your dog tell your friends and share the love because we love love We'll see you next time.