Life Uncut - ASK UNCUT - Porn, poonamis and politicians

Episode Date: May 4, 2022

Hey Lifers,On today's ask uncut, we're jumping into some sexy deep, dark and burning questions and one of them is quite literally about some sexy parts burning a little...Today we're tackling:- Should every sexual act with a partner be reciprocated? As in if you get something, should you give something in return?- Is it normal to have things from your previous relationship really trigger you in new ones? How can you stop it from ruining your new relationships?-Every time I have sex with my partner, I feel sensitive, a little sore and sometimes itchy afterwards. I can't seem to make it stop. Any advice please!-If you went on one date with someone and they just didn't message you for a month, but you had a good time on the initial date and now they've asked you to go on another... do you go?If you have a question you'd like us to answer, you can send them into lifeuncutpodcast on instagram! We'd also love your follow ups if we've answered one of your questions before!Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because we love love! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders, past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. This episode is recorded on Gadigal land of the Aurora Nation. Hey guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Brittany. And I'm Laura.

And this is our Thursday episode, our down and dirty, sexy little number, where we answer your deep, dark and burning questions. Now, if Laura sounds a little bit sexy... I've still lost my voice. My voice is still gone, but that's because we don't stop talking. No, it's because Brittany's been working me into the ground and won't let me take any records off. So that's why.

So eventually we're going to be doing records and I'm going to be like this. I'm going to smell it and sound like I'm a 10-pack-a-day gal. Are you waving these two fingers around? We are. Does this turn you on, Brittany? No. Smell my fingers. I wish this was recorded right now.

Also, I just want to tell you, speaking of smell my fingers, let me tell you. Speaking of. Let me tell you how my day started. So I'm laying in bed this morning. It's 5.30. and Lola, Lola, my beautiful little melon has, she's really gotten to this new routine where she wakes up so freaking early, but she lies in her cot and then she talks to herself. So she'll like lay in, it's cute. It's annoying. Cause it's early, but it's cute. At least she's not in the

hallway now. She's not screaming. Like she just wakes up and she's like, like smack it. Like she's, it's like, she's in jail where they go. She like gets her dummy and runs it along the rails of her car waiting to be fed so this morning she's in her cot it's 5 30 she's chatting to herself until 6 a.m and at 6 a.m i was like okay i'll get up i'll go get up so i get up i open the door let me tell you had i had a match on me i would have blown the fucking room up and diarrhea explosion she was like she had done it this is a lot for the beginning of the episode i'm gonna tell you the mom's gonna enjoy this she had done a poo in her nappy but not just in her nappy she had somehow taken her nappy off inside her bonds onesie and she was just ruminating in it imagine

doing a poo in a wetsuit it was like that she was just rolling around in it how no i just can't this is like that's not for me you just have to put the whole baby in the bin you do hey you just throw it all out go on how does she not scream and cry when she's rolling around in poo loved it it was warm maybe it was soft and that's what she was talking about maybe this sense of smell isn't what ours is that right one would assume that they're not repulsed by their own stench yeah i would say that that's probably if i was rolling around in my own shit i can tell you it's actually lucky that we we don't have a bath where we i mean not having a bath is a bit annoying when you've got kids but we do have one of those showers now that have got like the handheld hose

so i just have to get in there and hose it down like you would a car or something like you would on a farm or something yeah like exactly like you would to a dog i just threw that out because it's a segue into what I want to talk about. Well, I was going to say, what are you going to talk about? I want to talk about a farm in a really loose way. Bear with me, Laura. Laura, look on Laura's face. Well, I was going to go into Met Gala because I was like, on one hand, I'm here ruminating in my child's poo. And on the other hand, the most expensive extravagant people in all of the US are going to the Met Gala. All right. Well, we segued to the farm first. Okay. Farm me. Let's go cowgirl. You have to bear with me because I am just so shook at what I have read

and how, with everything that has ever happened in parliament around the world, how in 2022 this is happening. Now, the reason, you're probably thinking, how am I linking a farm, farmer and parliament? To my child in the cot doing a poo. Okay. Well, I want to talk about a British MP. One would call this a penundrum.

This is a penundrum. That was a good one. Thank you. There's a British MP that's in Boris Johnson's party. Is this the UK? Yeah, in the UK. That's where British is. That's why I say he's a British.

I missed that. I just heard you say Boris Johnson. There's a British MP. Oh, my God, is this in England? Nothing gets past me. You're on fire today. There's a British MP in Boris Johnson's party and he's also a farmer, but he's an MP.

So that's the correlation here. He has just been caught. He's resigned because not once but twice in parliament he has been caught while they're waiting to vote watching porn. on his phone in in parliament so like surrounded by people the news would probably be there like it's always this is always televised and he's sitting there watching porn and another female parliament member was next to him she's looking at him she's like i'm literally watching you watch porn like what are you doing i might i understand once i can i can forgive once maybe he accidentally

got there from like a rogue link or something but how does it happen twice okay well i can tell you The first time. Mr Parrish, a farmer, said the first time he had viewed the explicit material was when he had accidentally stumbled across it. Oh, yeah, all the time. I accidentally watched porn too. Whilst looking for tractors on a website with a similar name and then he had watched it for a bit when I shouldn't have done that.

Okay, so. Honest mistake. Pretend it was an honest mistake. You probably, when you are making decisions for your country, you probably shouldn't be looking to buy a tractor. He was looking for a big digger, not what else he found. The second time he just said, look, I did it on purpose, I shouldn't have done it, I got sprung.

At the end of the day, he's like, I did it deliberately, I'm embarrassed, and he's had to resign. For somebody to watch porn in Parliament, they must really be watching it all the time. Can I tell you about the funniest part of this? Yes. He works for the Conservative Party. Which I find the funniest part about the whole thing.

Not that he's looking for a tractor, not that he accidentally watched porn, not that he deliberately watched porn not that he did it next to a female parliament member but that he was in the conservative party doing all this can i also say something i've always wondered this is a bit off track but it does have to do with porn whenever i've watched porn i've always thought why the fuck is there a share button at the bottom like who am i going to share this to share it on facebook who is sharing porn with their friends and family on social media but it's probably not okay i'm gonna go as far as to say it's probably not to share to your story well It's like copy link, share here, copy link now like you would a Daily Mail article.

Yeah, but it could be like a long-distance relationship. You're both like masturbating, you want to watch the same porn or you're like, hey, jump on and watch this so we watch it at the same time. I mean like I'm just trying to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I don't think people are putting it to their stories and tweeting it. Well, I have to say that every single time I have watched porn, that is the thought that I have. I'm like, who would I share this to?

You can share it with me next time. Have you ever sent me a fire nude? I think you have sent me a nude. I have. You've sent me a nude and then asked me if it was a good nude for you to then send it to a guy? Actually, no. I remember one time I wasn't sending it anywhere.

I think I just took it because I thought I looked hot. And then I was like, hey, I took a fire nude. Can I show you? And you were like, yeah, you look good. But I had nowhere to send it. I remember I was like, I wish I had someone to show. Are you even friends if you can't send your best friend a nude? Okay, the thing I wanted to talk to you guys about

before we get into answering all your deep, dark and burning questions is certainly not pornography. What I wanted to talk about is what everyone's talking about at the moment. it is what has absolutely clogged up your Instagram feed over the last couple of days and that is the Met Gala. Now the reason why I wanted to talk about the Met Gala isn't because I wanted to talk about the ridiculous clothes but it's because I realized on Tuesday when I was looking at Instagram I realized I don't know what the fuck the Met Gala actually is for. I don't think you're alone. I don't think anyone knows what it's for. I think everyone knows it's

for a charity of some sorts but nobody can actually tell you what is the purpose of it apart from the fact that we all like on one hand we like to watch the fashion and on the second hand we all like to get real judgy and be like oh my god did you see what she was wearing she looked ridiculous so for anybody who doesn't know what the Met Gala actually is this is your little life lesson here we go the Met Gala is held at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York and the main purpose of the Met Gala is to raise funds for a charity however that we love that We love a charity event. When I thought it was for charity, I was like, oh, cute,

they're helping the homeless or maybe like they're contributing. Ending world famine. Yeah, world hunger. But no, the money that is raised from the Met Gala goes towards the museum's costume institution. So basically. Yes, you heard that right. The museum has a huge collection of costumes and the money that's raised

via the Met Gala goes towards acquiring more costumes to go into the range, which just so you know how this kind of works, you can buy a ticket to go to the Met Gala. Well, you can't, I can't, we can't. The plebs can't. But very, very wealthy people from very expensive brands can. Well, even Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian have never been invited before this year. So you have to be invited to come first and then you have to purchase the ticket.

So the tickets are around $44,000. That's $44,000 US. And often what will happen is that celebrities, they don't actually have to buy the tickets at all because brands, big brands, will buy the tickets on their behalf and then they will dress them. and that's how it works. But basically Anna Wintour, who is the editor-in-chief in Vogue, she is 72 years old, Anna Wintour is basically queen costume. She sits there and individually picks every single one

of the 500 people who goes to the Met Gala. She goes through and says, yes, this brand is allowed to dress this celebrity, and yes, this celebrity is allowed to attend, and that is it. And it's raised over $20 million for costumes. For costumes. For the best costume box in the world. I mean, that's all well and good.

it's like Anna Wintour I just imagine her she's like from the Hunger Games like you get to live you get to live that's what it's like or she's the Oprah of fashion I feel like you just merged Oprah and the Hunger Games together there and it got real weird I do that you get a car you get a car you get to live you get to come you get to dress up in the ugly dress and this is the thing right I think a lot of people don't know that like I know I definitely didn't I just used to always think oh my god they're raising so much money for something it must be good because There's no way that we could fathom that they could be raising this much money

when the world is in a crisis right now. We have to just think about what's happening in the Ukraine right now. Hunger that has been happening. This is not a new thing around the world. This has been happening for a very long time. Hunger is definitely not a new thing. No, it's not.

But like we have been working, the world has been working towards trying to eradicate world hunger for a long time. But we are dropping what? $20 million. And that's US. Let's just say that's, you know, $25, $30 million, whatever.

$40 million Australian. That is ludicrous on costumes. No one's ever going to see them. The celebrities pretend to look at them. They walk inside and they pretend to look at them quickly, but they're only there for their photo op. That's the thing. The clothes, the costumes then go into the museum

and then the general public pay money to go and see the costumes. So I think that there might be some money going into someone's pocket. That's just my speculation. No one sue me. I'm calling out. I'm just guessing. I really enjoyed this year's fashion because I'm a sucker for it. And also, can we just take a moment?

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are my favourite couple in the entire world. I have her up on my screen now. she's by far she's exquisite and I don't use that word loosely or lightly she is an exquisite human being her dress is exquisite he is even more exquisite I mean the men don't get a look in at the Met Gala let's be fair I mean Ryan Reynolds always gets a look in he's so beautiful but next to Blake Lively you don't get a look in but anyway guys that is enough about the Met Gala we hope that you learned something because I certainly did let's get into the purpose of this episode which is answering all of your deep, your dark, your burning questions.

Question number one. Hey, girls, so I have a bit of a longstanding question. Do you girls think that every sexual act with a partner should be reciprocated? For context, I caught up with this guy over the weekend and he got really mad that after he went down on me, I didn't return the favour. I wasn't really into it and him going down on me was spontaneous.

I didn't ask him to do it. Now this has sparked a bit of an ethical debate amongst my friendship group and I love your take on it. Oh fuck you mad boy go to anger management. No I mean like my joy is on the ground no there is absolutely zero expectation that you have to do something ever or that you have to do something because someone did it for you so there should be no expectations here. I mean like give generously in a relationship but that doesn't mean that you have to give every it's not like for life it's not if you scratch my back I'll scratch yours I actually that is such a big turn off for me so when somebody says to me like if I say to somebody if I'm dating them if I was like oh do

you mind like rubbing my shoulder or something I've got a really bad headache well if are you gonna give me one back if somebody says that to me I'm out I'm done I hate people saying that they'll only do something if you do it in return for me there's like no bigger turn off I think the next time that he says well if you're not going to do it for me then I won't do it for you like the next time you have penetrative sex tell him well I now have to do it to you so here's my vibrator bend over and I'll stick this in your backside because every if it's good for me and then you're going to do it to me then I'm going to do it to you I think that's a bit extreme but I also love that you the writer I love that you've said it's not like I asked for it he did it on his

own accord and that's absolutely true but in all seriousness even if you did ask for it even if you did say hey go down on me whilst you're in the middle of a like a hot sexy makeout session and he does it that is still not you consenting to saying yes it means I'm gonna do it back like you can you can do whatever the fuck you want to and also the part of this that makes me quite annoyed and when I read this it was the reason why I wanted to do this question nobody should ever get mad at you for not doing something when it comes to sex and if they do not doing fellatio well it just reinforces that they are an absolute child in their views around sex that the fact that he feels entitled to anything is problematic and if this is a guy that you've just had a one-night

stand with if this is a casual relationship i would really be considering as to whether you would want to go and do anything with him again do you know what i remember this has just sparked this memory right now oh glad glad to bring up something from the past you bury your trauma and then this brings it up here's brittany going to the cupboard taking that box of memories down It was a few years ago, like obviously well before I was dating Jordan, when I was just on the dating scene and I remember I had been seeing this guy and I hadn't slept with him and he took me to dinner one night and we'd been seeing each other for a little bit, but I, you know, sometimes I don't want to sleep with people.

That's, that's what it is. I can date you. I mean, it's rare, but every so often I don't want to do it. I can date you for six months. If I don't want to sleep with you, I'm not going to sleep with you. Of course not. And I remember we'd been seeing each other for a couple of weeks, hadn't slept together. and then he took me to a nice dinner he asked me to dinner he paid because he asked me I did my

standard like oh you know like let's go um so he's like no no I'll get it fine ticked all the boxes and then we went going home to watch a movie he was like do you want to watch a movie and I was like not really but fine whatever watch a movie he tried well Netflix but there's gonna be zero chill buddy he tried to sleep with me and I said no I said no I don't want that like we're here to watch a movie put my feet up on the ottoman I'm like don't touch me like let's just watch the movie so he was like oh I thought that was cute you know he's like oh he must have been like oh she's playing hard to get but I was like fuck off so he did he stopped and then he tried to sleep with me again and I said I already said I'm not going to sleep with you this is a hard no and he

said you owe me that was his words I quote you owe me and I said excuse me I said what exactly do I owe you and owe you for and he said we've been seeing each other for weeks and I just took you to a really nice dinner you owe me and i said get the fuck out of my house i'm not a fucking sex worker which okay no zero judgment towards sex workers but that's like a transactional that's a transactional relationship he was trying to make it transactional yeah and my jaw is on the fucking floor did you ever see him again it was a guy from years ago meat raffle the og lifers will know meat raffle no one knows meat raffle but they'll know meat raffle there was okay like brit was dating this guy named meat raffle in the very beginning of this podcast and then

all of a sudden she was off meat raffle and now we know why she was off meat raffle but i i just couldn't believe it and i mean this just comes full circle right long story short so get the fuck out i'm not gonna see you again because as i grow up the fact that you think that this is a thing no one ever owes you a thing we had a full-on fight and i kicked him out standard standard like it happens all the time i kicked him out standard classic britney maneuver no but i just want to bring this back full circle because my point is the circumstances the circumstances do not matter under no circumstances ever whether you are in a long-term relationship whether you're new to dating whether you really like someone whether someone's done something to you if you

don't want to do something you don't have to do it don't let anyone guilt you into feeling like you do amen amen sister okay the only extra thing I want to add to this is that there are loads of people in relationships who don't really like like giving head but they like getting head and their partners are fine with that. Like you, just because you don't like doing something doesn't mean that you don't like receiving it. And it does not make you selfish. It doesn't make you a selfish lover. So long as you are being generous in other ways and you are like, you know, exploring and being whatever it is in different ways, satisfying your partner, then I think it's absolutely fine. There are girls out there who do not like giving head.

There are girls out there who like guys going down on them. And I don't think that anybody can sit here and say that just because something's done to you, you have to be okay with giving it back. And it makes me angry. Yeah. So anyway, the answer to that is no, don't feel bad and you absolutely don't have to do anything. All right. Question number two, how do you deal with triggers from an old relationship in your new relationship? I was badly cheated on by an ex-boyfriend, girl same. However, I did the healing and I have had emotional growth from that relationship. I'm now in a new relationship and he is wonderful. He's kind, caring, smart, emotionally mature and it's the easiest relationship i've ever been in we had our first

sort of argument recently and i realized that it mostly had to do with the trigger for me that i had for my past relationship the trigger is cancelled plans at the very last minute oh and that is because my ex did that whenever he was cheating on me i completely lost it and got myself really anxious and worked up over a very very trivial thing because i know my new partner didn't mean to do it and he apologized and said he would do better next time. Now my question is this, is there a way to deal with triggers from old relationships in your new relationships? I'm finding that my mind is my worst enemy at the moment. Feels girl, feels. This is tough because it's so easy for somebody to sit back and say, don't worry about it. You can't take that shit

into your new relationship, leave it behind. But it's a whole nother kettle of fish to actually leave that stuff behind and you don't necessarily need to leave it behind but you do need to find a way to move forward with it and the reason I'm saying this is this question the way you wrote that is like a trigger for me because that was my two-year relationship with that sociopath episode three I did a sociopath for the new listeners very this is like we're going back episode three original of the first season it's the OG life uncut you haven't listened to it we haven't recommended it for a while explains a lot about who I am and why I am what I am but the big part of that relationship and I can't tell you how many times our plans were cancelled

last minute and Laura I don't even know if I've told you some of this but I'm talking like I'm talking I went to Hawaii alone because he cancelled a trip to Hawaii last minute I went to this is before I lived in Sydney I came down to Sydney and climbed the fucking harbour bridge alone because he cancelled the trip last minute I have gone and had to find emergency accommodation because he cancelled stuff last minute and he always said he always had very good excuses for it but he was cheating but now that once it all came out and I knew his partner because he had another partner that we connected once I found out we put all the timelines together it was always things like we had a weekend planned we're on the way to meet each other and

she would surprise him last minute so he would have to call me and say that this big traumatic event had happened and he can't make it I'll pay for everything I'll give you a really good time I still go to this dinner I'll order your room service whatever he always made sure I was looked after but the number of times that happened I can't tell you like I literally went on a romantic trip to Hawaii by myself so this is very triggering for me but moving into a new relationship I mean obviously we know that I battled that for a while I was single for a while but what I had to end up doing is just telling myself I mean besides a lot of therapy you should definitely speak to someone professional if you're struggling, but I just had to tell myself that my ex had already

taken so much from me. He took so much of those years that I can't get back. And I don't regret them because I always take something from a situation, but I just say, he took those years from me. He took the following few years as I was trying to learn to deal with that and get over that. I'm not going to let him take my future happiness or the possibility of future happiness. if you can't trust like trust is the basis of a relationship so you have to be able to trust the person you're with and at the end of the day I just told myself that okay I'm gonna give this person the benefit of the doubt I can't think that every person is like my ex if they do the wrong thing that's on them and I'll be okay and I'll I'll just move forward knowing that they're

not the right persons but if you can't go into a relationship trusting that your partner is going to do the right thing I just think you're probably in the wrong relationship and you need to do a little bit more work on yourself it's okay to have insecurities and things like that have you communicated that to him does he know why you feel upset at a last minute cancellation because if he doesn't know he probably doesn't even know he's triggering you yeah and I guess on all of what Britt said I mean I think sorry I did word yeah it's like the only thing I think is a bit different is that I think it's okay that we take triggers from our past relationships I think that it's probably unrealistic to think that nothing that you're going to be this completely healed version

of yourself and you're never going to get triggered. So I think have some compassion for yourself and just like, don't be so hard on yourself that yes, on this instant, you acted a little bit crazy. But the thing is, and the thing that I think is the big take home message from this is be proud that you can identify that that was a trigger. Be proud that you are saying, Hey, I did something wrong here. It actually wasn't him. It was me. It takes a really big person to admit that you're wrong. And to be able to say to your partner, I overreacted. It's an embarrassing thing to admit that when you've overreacted. So I think don't be so hard on yourself. And if you are listening to this, like anyone who's been in this situation, who's

kind of gone eight shit at their partner and then realized actually it was more on them than what it was on their actual partner. Acknowledging that is a very, very big step. Secondly, and I think it's what you said, Britt, just to kind of like elaborate on that a little bit, being really open and honest with your partner, talking about what your insecurities are, why you have those insecurities and just showing a level of vulnerability, explaining where that comes from with your past relationship giving your partner that understanding will mean that they will be more aware and be more conscious because something that they he probably just thought oh fuck she's not going to care but now he understands that that sort of situation is something that you

care a lot about yeah and you don't want him walking away being like wow well that was unnecessary and it's managing his expectations and giving him an insight into what makes you tick so I think that open channels of conversation and just being kind to yourself that we aren't perfect we aren't perfect people we come to relationships with a bit of baggage sometimes from our past experiences and that is okay totally I love that you said that it's it is 100% okay because you're never going to walk away from a relationship no matter what happens you might have an amazing relationship you don't walk away the same person as when you entered that relationship and that's just growth evolution human growth like it's part of growing up and living the only other thing I want to add

always like and then one more thing because I think it's I think it's really important but what I do want to add is just something to have a think about that you may or may not be doing but a lot of people do I know Laura's done it I know I've done it it's self-sabotage when you don't think when you've been hurt in the past maybe you don't even know this maybe it's subconscious but maybe you think that you're not worth love or the same you're telling yourself the same thing's going to happen again we have a really bad habit of sabotaging our own relationships before they can take off because you're like, I'm going to end this before you even have the chance to cheat on me. I did that multiple times because I thought, you know, it's safer. Oh, I think it's

getting too close. It's safer for me to run now before anything can happen. And it wasn't until I recognized I was doing that because everyone in my life pointed it out. It wasn't until I recognized that with myself that I found any, any way possible to move forward. And that was when I started to accept that we do change. Not everyone's the same, but I did have to have a very, very deep level of self-reflection there so it's just something to question yourself question number three a lot of like sexy questions today this one has to do with the vagina the vajayjay actually it's not to do with the vulva actually and the vagina we did a bit of both we did an episode on that how many women experience some discomfort in the vajayjay after having sex

regularly like with a partner just say x number of times a week i'm unsure if this is just me if i'm very sensitive or if me and my partner are just not sexually compatible normally if we have sex several days in a row i get very sensitive and very unbalanced slash itchy it's like i need a couple of days break every now and then anyway hopefully get some answers to what other people are experiencing she put a laugh at the end okay i read this and i was like girlfriend me too and Do you want to know what this is? And look, I could be wrong, but this is what I think it is. I think you got thrush.

It's like super, super, super mild. Like there's no weird discharge. There's none of the things that like when you've got a full-blown, because everyone knows when they've got full-blown thrush. This is just like there's an imbalance there, and then every time you're getting down and dirty with a pain, it comes back with a vengeance because you're adding more of that. You're adding all of his microflora to your microflora,

and it's messing up the balance. And that's exactly what you've said. You said you feel unbalanced and itchy. that is i mean like we are not doctors so pop that in there i was gonna say thank you for saying that because i think that that was an absolutely imperative fucking disclaimer but it does sound very much like thrush which let me tell you i don't think there's a woman in her life that gets through life unscathed everyone has thrush at some point but some people get recurrent thrush some people are way more open to thrush and they i have friends that get thrush every time they

have oh my god they're constantly taking thrush tablets thrush cream they've got it on hand i think it depends on the period as well I literally I went through a massive chunk of time there where literally anytime Matt even looked at me I got thrush and I was like could you just stop get it away from me but I I think so for me when I went through this period I think sometimes you think you've treated it and then it goes to being like very very bearable like you can't notice it but the imbalance is still there so I think like go and see a doctor explain what your symptoms are and then go and do a really thorough course of not just thrush treatment but also probiotics as well just so that you can get back on top of things also some people get it some people get

it at your level and they don't treat it because it's not bad enough it's just like the smallest level of discomfort and they don't know what it is so it's like itchy yeah so they're like a bit itchy it'll go in a few days so they don't actually treat it so maybe you've been having this really low level but you've just never I mean obviously you haven't been able to put a name to it because you're not sure and you're writing to us it sounds very very much like thrush now in case you don't know it's really as simple as going if this is what it is you can just go to your pharmacy and you can just say hey I need a thrush tablet or you can get a cream for it there's a lot of things you can do for it but I would recommend that if you are if you've had this for a long period of

time at this level go and speak to the pharmacist so that you're and you're not just trying to treat it yourself go and speak to the pharmacist for what the best option would be for something that's been a bit more long term also why is it that we're so frightened to talk about thrush like no woman wants to have a conversation about it we all think it's embarrassing every single one of gets it like it is so freaking common we'll talk about having a cold but we won't talk about having thrush and I'm seriously I just think we've all been there okay well I do want to tell you about one other thing this is not what you well I mean I don't think this is what you have I'm just saying this because I think it's interesting did you know you can actually be allergic to a penis like a

vagina can be allergic to a penis just any like all penises or just one penis it's called it's called genital allergy it's not common but what they say is like this sort of thing should be considered if you are having like a soreness or sort of other symptoms irritation but there's nothing really else presenting some people can be allergic to that person's penis i don't think it's every dick oh my god imagine if you were in love with someone and you were like sorry my allergy to your penis is keeping us apart i know someone that was allergic to their partners in love husband semen so that semen semen you can be allergic to semen yeah wow it's hectic he's definitely not going to do that anyway you don't have those but also if you've never been to a

doctor before go get it checked out get some blood tests ask him some questions because you just never know and the other thing as well as it could just be that you're having super vigorous sex and you know you know there's too much chafing not enough lube all of those things can be contributing factors but i think we need to have more conversations about thrush but i on a very serious note I do want to be serious for a second it's very important for every woman this is your reminder too if you haven't gone and had a sexual health check or you haven't had your pap smear you haven't had all of these things in a little while this is your reminder just to go and get it done because there are some things that happen that we don't know are happening to our body we know that

sometimes we get lazy sometimes we're like we forget that it's been two three four years since we've gone and had a check so this is your reminder all right I have one more ask uncut I was talking to this guy for a month and then he decided to take me out on a date and we went for some drinks. It was a really nice time and I really enjoyed it. However, I felt a little bit confused and annoyed as afterwards, I just didn't hear from him like at all. Now, a whole month later on, he has messaged me like no time has passed at all. He just messaged me out of the blue and asked me if I wanted to have drinks. The thing is, I really did like him on this date and had a really great time do you think he actually likes me or do you think he's just interested in

sleeping with me i don't want to come off as easy or that i'd be the person to just stop everything at the drop of a hat and run back to going on a second date with him what should i do okay this sounds like a classic case of tinder-itis i think this is the ghost this is the ghost that's been resurrected as a zombie and has come back to fucking haunt you this just sounds all too familiar Yeah, and unfortunately, there are a lot of people, women and men, that this happens to. To get to the end quickly and answer your question, I think that yes, he is probably, and I want to say this in the nicest way, but this is the impression I get. I think he's probably got nothing else going on.

He's probably bored. Obviously, you had a good time. If he didn't go and call you, you said, you know, you didn't hear anything from him. That's because he's not interested in anything more. A month later, he's got nothing going on. he's probably horny he's like well we did have a good time maybe i'll hit her up i'll see if she's around i think that's what this is now there's obviously no foolproof way to say it but in my experience which is pretty broad but i think that that's what he's done and i mean like we've all

been there i've been on that side too i've been like oh this person from uh you know britney there on a saturday night firing off a few fucking messages to guys from three years ago i'm like hey remember hey what have you been up to britney it's been three years uh yeah so stuff well you point is what no so but I think seriously I think that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that if you are also okay with that if you are happy to go out and have some fun you don't have to sleep with him you can go and have another dinner with him for sure maybe see if there is anything there that's that's the way of you saying if he's serious to date you if you do feel like you just want to have sex and sleep with someone then that's also okay but it's got to be okay with you

so if you feel deep down like he has done the wrong thing and he's after one thing that you're not after i wouldn't waste my time if you know you're on different paths don't go there if you're like fuck i couldn't care less about this guy now but i wouldn't like it yeah you've just got to ask yourself what you want and are you the biggest question is are you going to if you go and sleep with him are you going to feel bad the next day are you going to feel guilty like he's used you because you want more then don't do it totally and if you think that you will feel bad if you never hear from him again then i think you have to expect the worst because he's already proven that he is somebody who doesn't feel necessary to message after a date if it's not going the

way that he expects it to go. Now, I think this is a really interesting one because we have spoken or I have spoken about my feelings around what constitutes ghosting, right? I think if you've gone on one date with someone and had a drink with them and there's been no spark and you've given no intention that you want to see them again, like if you've said, oh, I can't wait to take you out on a second date, then yes, you should fucking text them. But if you've just been like this totally wasn't for me and you've given them no intention you don't have to send a follow up or anything i think you can just disappear into the nether however you can't then reappear a month later well you can you've got to know what it is you can but but the thing is i feel like

with this question it would be so easy for brit and i to take the high road and be like oh my god you deserve better girlfriend do not write back to him i think at this early stage yeah there's a good chance that he's a player but whatever if you are just after something casual and you want to have fun go do whatever it is that you want to do but also be very very conscious that he is the guy who doesn't text back so if you want something very well could disappear totally he's a fucking casper he's a zombie reincarnated so if you want something that's more serious if you're at that point in your life then maybe he isn't the person to be investing time with however if you're after casual if you're after fun if you just want to go out and spend some good old time on a saturday

night then mr zombie is your man you can for sure use him for sex too it works two ways totally i agree with what you said laura in terms of like if you've gone on a date you don't and you don't like them you don't necessarily have to text them but where i disagree is if she has if they've been on one day and she's messaged him and he just didn't respond that's fucking rude like that's where they should have written back and said had oh you know i did have fun but i don't see you going anywhere not this like complete disappearance and then reappearance when he's horny well I mean I guess it's that thing that we all no matter what happens in life we all seek some sort of closure you know we all want to kind of be able to go okay cool I'm gonna I'm gonna shut that book and I'm

gonna go out and look for somebody else I'm not gonna kind of keep my options open there and when you ghost someone or when someone ghosts you they're denying you of that closure regardless of how insignificant the meetup or the relationship was you kind of are left trying to figure out oh did i say something wrong do they just not like me because i'm too this this and this maybe they're seeing somebody else and that somebody else is better like you are then left to kind of figure it out yourself the answer we come up with that gives us closure isn't always the kindest answer to ourselves deep i like that there we go that's a good finish anyway that is it from us guys i need to stop fucking recording so i can get my voice back we've just got so many interviews banked and

it was really unfortunate timing like we got a lot of people lined up to talk to great people and Laura's lost her voice at like a crucial time. But it's the job, we talk too much. We do. I sound like I've been deep throating some sandpaper. Why would you ever do that? I think you sound- Wasn't the best night I had on Saturday night.

I think you sound sort of sexy. But that's it, guys. Keep your questions coming in. If you do have any questions, you want us to answer Life Uncut podcast on Instagram, just make sure you put Ask Uncut at the top. And if anyone wants me to start an OnlyFans account where I basically just read to you a sexy novel

or something, as though it's like a sex hotline, let me know. Slide into the DMs. Maybe that can be my new calling. And also, if you do have an Ask Uncut update, we're calling them the Ask Uncut Aftermath. We want to hear that too. If we've ever answered your question, ever, over the last two years, write back to us.

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