Life Uncut - ASK UNCUT - Two weddings and hopefully a relationship funeral

Episode Date: January 21, 2021

Therapy Thursday is here with Ask Uncut!We love giving you guys our unqualified but passionate yet questionable advice!We randomly had so many wedding questions this week ! Something must be in the air! ( What is it? Seriously, tell me, asking for a friend)So we decided to tackle two common wedding questions and then of course a relationship/family problem."What are the rules at a wedding with gifts.... ie my friends didn't give me one, does this mean I can get away with not giving them one? What is the acceptable amount to give?""Halppppppppppp I hate my brothers girlfriend. She is mean and rude and he deserves better. Can I and should I tell him what I really think? Or just sit back and watch him burn""Do I have to go to my friends hens party and wedding? I don't really want to but how can I say no!? Also she didn't even invite my boyfriend!?"What do you guys think about inviting your friends partners to weddings? Yay nor Nay? Find out what we think on todays episode.Keep those questions rolling in guys to our insta @lifeuncutpodcast and share the love, because, well, we love love xSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

hi guys and welcome back to another episode of life uncut this is our quick down and dirty usually you say i'm laura oh yeah i'm laura i'm britney hi britney okay continue okay this is our quick down and i'm trying to make it extra quick i didn't even want to intro us this time you're like hey question one so all right fuckers let's get into this this is our quick down and dirty episode which you guys know this is where we answer all your deep dark and burning questions but this one's going to be even quicker downer and dirtier doesn't want to borrow that's not even true i'm i'm guys we're we're like okay i'm i've said i wouldn't talk about baby talk anymore but i lied because i'm gonna do it right now i am 37 weeks

we have two weeks left let me talk about it and complain I think I actually think when you're human right when you're two weeks away from giving birth I feel like you have every right to complain as much as you want so yesterday we had this massive day like I haven't finished work yet but I'm gonna take off next week which is like one week off before the baby's due and you go crazy I'm gonna have a one week of maternity leave but um I had a shoot yesterday for tony may we're down at the national park we started super early in the morning and we shot all day until 7 p.m and we were running up and down rock platforms all day and by the end of it i realized i was walking from side to side but wasn't actually moving forward at all like

imagine that i was like waddling side to side on this rock platform trying to get forward but like on a treadmill everything hurts so much that i was just moving on the spot well because people that are 37 weeks pregnant shouldn't be clocking up like five kilometers a day on their feet I've just got an arm hanging out from between my legs it's great you're like baby stay in there I've got to get the shot the pelvic floor I mean I sneeze and I pee myself but now I'm like really clenching those pelvic floor muscles so they just need it to stay in for another week at least but guys we are going to jump straight into it today so I'm going to just kick start with a question we have okay before you kick start with a question I'm just going to preempt this you know what I

just try and get on board with you and make it quick because you want it quick and now you want to talk about something else I wanted a quickie but then I wanted a little bit of foreplay as well yeah you can't have it all you get your foreplay or you get your quickie which one is it dry it's like i don't want to be sore afterwards no one wants to listen to that i was just gonna say we have picked out some questions for you today and two of these questions are wedding related questions and we thought maybe that's a bit too much but then we did read them again a couple of times and i was like you know what if you've ever been to a wedding or you've been invited to a wedding or you might go to a wedding next year then both of these questions are going to be very

relative to you we just thought we may as well stick with the theme yeah I like a good wedding question so anyway all right hit me number one question number one so for our wedding we asked for money in our wishing well two of our really good friends did not give us a present or a card which you know I'm fine with each to their own but when it comes to their wedding which we are invited to in the very near future are we expected to contribute to their wishing well this is a good question firstly are you 100 sure that they didn't leave money in the wishing well because some people don't necessarily put it in a car they're just putting an envelope there's like some anonymous few hundred dollar notes that are flying around nah no one gives money anymore

without putting the name on it it's a bit enthusiastic wasn't it yeah i feel like that's wishful thinking if someone's got enough money to be like waving hundies around without attaching a name like if i give a hundred dollars out that person's got a nose for me the i mean this is kind of like a golden rule with weddings it's like however much it is per head is what is the expected gift worth so like is it yeah yeah so like I did not know that and how are you supposed to know how much it is ahead well I guess you kind of assume that like you know a hundred dollars to 150 dollars depending on the type of wedding that it is is like what they would be paying so I think like I personally would say 150 gift like cash gift per person is like a kind generous wedding

gift and I think if I'm gonna go out on a Saturday night and have a big you know dinner and drinks night it's probably going to cost me 150 anyway so you've got unlimited drinks you've got unlimited food like that's kind of you paying for yourself and that's like the sentiment that goes behind the gift giving that they're not out of pocket at the end of day oh see i didn't know that i didn't know that that was a rule am i making this up now maybe this is a rule that i just made up for myself it works really well guys at the bottom of laura's invite she's like p.s it's 150 ahead if everyone could please provide the amount pop in the wishing well that will be on the entrance Thank you very much for coming to my party.

No, look, the way I think about this is, of course, there are no expectations. Of course, you don't have to bring a present. Of course, you don't have to give money. But there is this sort of unwritten expectation that you do do something because it is wishing someone well. And it's just the done thing. Well, and it's also like a bit fucking rude to go to someone's wedding, enjoy their hospitality, enjoy the party, have a great time, drink all you can, party on all night, and then not give any, not even a card to say thank you. thank you, or we're wishing you well. It's just rude. I think the card thing is the bit that gets me because there are a lot of people financially that don't have the money to go throwing around.

And if somebody came to my wedding and didn't have the money to buy me a gift or give me a card, I, from the bottom of my heart can tell you, I would not care, but I would still expect, I suppose, a card saying, you know, congratulations, best wishes. We love you so much. That's enough for me. However, maybe the idea is like by not leaving a card, maybe they won't notice do you know what I mean like so if you don't leave a card because like if you leave a card and there's nothing inside and it's just a card that says we're wishing you so well we love you then maybe there's this thought that like oh well then they will 100% know they're gonna know anyway because what a bride and groom do after they get their wishing

well is that they sit down with their guest list and they write down what each person has given so that they can write a thank you note so they know if nothing has been left like I think you know bride and grooms are pretty acutely aware if somebody has not left a present because there is a lot of organization that goes into it but there's more to it than that it's just not that they're going to go through the list it's that these are two of her best friends like there's no way this is slipping by them but this is what I find interesting when I'm trying to think about it for example you and I are such good friends I'm not getting you anything no but my point is if you got me nothing I wouldn't care but I also wouldn't be able to say to you like hey I noticed

you didn't bring me anything like I wouldn't be that's what I mean even though we're good enough friends there's almost nothing that you and I can't say to each other but I would leave that unsaid I would be like just I'm just gonna let that pretend it didn't happen I'm gonna let it slide under the boat that's not even an expression slide under the boat but also I think look there are maybe some external circumstances where it is okay for example like if you genuinely are going through financial hardship and you cannot contribute money or you cannot buy a gift then like like we said a card is like the absolute bare minimum that you can do a really sentimental card is something that I think you have to do if you're going to a wedding. Maybe

it's an international wedding. This is what I think the rules don't apply, okay? If you've been invited to go overseas to go to a wedding and it has cost you a freaking bomb, which some weddings do cost so much money to even just attend them, then I think that there can't be an expectation to come, do all this travel, put all this effort in and then pay even more money. I think in that instance then there's a little bit of wiggle room here but I think if it's just something that's relatively local or you know you because you opt into a wedding you don't have to go if you can't afford it so I think that there is an expectation for some sort of gift I agree I think if you've gone internationally then you know every all the rules are out the door but to answer your specific

question which here is do you now have to get them a gift when you go to a wedding well no you don't but would I? Yes. I would still give them a card and put some money in it just because I'm not a tit for tat kind of person. I don't do something to get something back. And I think that's where a lot of people go wrong. And if you are doing something purely in hopes of someone will return that exact favor, then I think you're doing it for the wrong reason. You're so nice. You clearly have never been to like a big Greek or Italian wedding where it's like, Okay. So like in, in, in like big Italian families, our families keep track of what other family members have given so that we can give the same amount back at the next wedding.

Like, it's like, that's a cultural thing. Like it's not the norm by any means. And I'm totally with you. I don't think that this is a time where you should necessarily feel like you need to do a tit for tat. However, if you chose not to give anything at that wedding, they can't say anything about it. No, like they don't have the right to be angry. Like, because they did the same to you at your wedding. But also write the goddamn card. If you're giving them nothing, still give them a card because then you've got one up on them anyway. Here's my $7 Hallmark card. Wait, leave the price on the back. Yeah. I think it is rude at the end of the day to go to a wedding and to not give anything. It just feels like you haven't put any time or energy into it. And I think in today's

day and age with online shopping, with being organized, there is always opportunity to buy something that is not hugely expensive if you cannot afford to put 150 cash in go and buy a nice cheese platter go and buy something they can use for the house it doesn't have to be something that costs you an arm and a leg but something that's sentimental that shows that you've thought about this and that you care and didn't just rock up to get pissed at a party I think is really important and I think that for me as a friend I'd be like okay I appreciate that you've gone to the effort because it truly is the thought that counts and you know Laura and I feel like you know if I gave you a card with nothing in it you would know that okay like britney's been really spending her

money on something we need to talk you know you need to start hawking some product on instagram because something's going wrong go sell a kidney girl but you would know you would know and you wouldn't question it because you'd be like okay something's wrong with britney in her financial life i'm not going to question it because there's no way i know as a friend that she would do that and then you would leave it the thing that gets me here is just the no card thing yeah and i think that maybe also the sentiment is like sometimes you go to a wedding and you forget the gift or you forget to bring the card. No, like, I mean, there's definitely going to be times

where you get there and, like, you're like, oh, I'll do it later. Like, I'm sure that there are people who have good intentions and in their mind they're like, oh, I'll give it to them the next time I see them. But if you do that and then you don't give it to them the next time you see them, you're just that dickhead that showed up at a wedding, didn't bring anything. Do you know what the funny thing is that I'm thinking right now?

If this girl listens to our podcast religiously and she's written in, chances are her two best friends listen to the podcast too. Hey, so go and get the card and slide it under a door. Maybe this is something that's going to be controversial. Maybe there's going to be people that totally disagree with this. I'm interested to put this one up on the Instagram, see what on the Instagram.

On the interweb. To see what people say. But I want to poll on this. I want to see like, what is like a considered amount of money? Like, am I being too overzealous and thinking that $150 is normal? Is it $80? Is it $200? I don't know.

I want to know what you guys think from a poll of what is an acceptable amount of money. personally i genuinely feel like my go-to for a wedding i think a hundred dollars is fine i think if it was like my best friend and i was in the bridal party i would have done a lot more for them throughout the period but i think that these day and age a hundred dollars is completely acceptable i don't think if anyone opened a card with a hundred dollars in it they would say can you believe that and they gave me a hundred dollars you think you make a really good point around like hens parties and stuff like if you are a part of the bridal party that shit costs so

much money so much money like I cannot tell you like in the last couple of years how much money I have spent on hens parties on like because you know hens parties often these days require going overseas or they require like a lavish weekend away or something and it just racks up so maybe in this instance like if you've spent so much money on the hens party and you've spent so much money on other things leading up to the wedding then that can all be taken into account as well And I think if this is your, like for the person who's written this in, if you had a bougie AF hen's party and your friends had to pay a lot of money to come to that, then I kind of don't really think that you should expect a big wedding present, but you can

still expect a card. Yeah. Okay. I think we've covered this one. Yeah. Okay. Right. Right.

Good thing that we're keeping this short and sharp today, people. We always do. We get really passionate about it. About like literally the most nothing or the most, most minute detail, but I'm sure that there's other people out there like feeling enraged by this. When we get closer to Laura's wedding, we will do way more episodes on wedding stuff and getting ready and like the stresses of it. No, we won't.

I'm so not a wedding person. No, but we'll do one episode on like weddings, but like that'll be it. Yes, boss. Okay. I'm already bossing you around regarding my wedding. Question number two. What do you do when you really don't like your brother's girlfriend? He's 25 and she's 21.

Usually I would just wait it out, but he's just got a job interstate and she's now following him there. Don't get me wrong. she's nice enough but she's always so demanding and he's always doing something wrong in her eyes like he's not calling her enough or he's not being affectionate enough in public she's always all over him talking about how intelligent she is compared to him and it drives me insane she's even starting to demand things like a proposal she takes it upon herself to point things out that she doesn't like about our family and I've caught her out a few times fabricating stories

and embellishing truths to make herself seem better she also has lots of chronic issues mental and physical in the big scheme of things it's nothing major she's just not the kind of person I want for my brother what do I do do I say something or do I just butt out let him work it out for himself what are the rules when you don't like someone else in your family oh you just sabotage it like you totally ruin that relationship until he breaks up with her go to town do you think you just like set it set up that she's cheated on him okay that's what not to do okay i think you suck it up girlfriend like this is his life this is his relationship if he's at a point i mean he's pretty young still like if he's at a point where

he's settling for bad behavior he will probably wake up to it at some point and see it for what it is but by you jumping in and by you giving your two cents you're only going to drive a wedge between you and your brother not between him and his girlfriend i think that's the thing you need to be really careful about imagine if it was your boyfriend and your brother said to you oh I don't really like him for xyz reasons if anything I think that usually makes people dig their heels in more and and really galvanizes the couple more so than opening their eyes to what the other person in the relationship is doing wrong here's what I think I think you have to tread carefully with this one but I think there is a way around it it depends how close you are with your brother

you're obviously very protective of him so I'm gonna just like make an assumption that you were close enough that you would talk to each other what you need to do is wait for the opportunity that they've had a fight or they're having a tiff or there's a bit of a problem and if that opportunity arises and he's like you know things aren't great right now that's your opportunity to say yeah I didn't want to say anything but I've noticed a few things like how do you feel when she does this but that's your opportunity to start the conversation and maybe tread really gently as you enter the conversation because like Laura said when you go in attacking someone that someone else loves they're going to get on the back foot they're going to get defensive and

they're going to blame you and they're going to push away from you but this also comes with some problems because you risk saying too much about not liking them and you risk them working out and getting back together and then everyone knows you don't like that was exactly what I was about to say I was like and this is like something that I've experienced with my ex-relationship that I spoke about when we went through our breakup and then all my friends were like yeah we hate him he doesn't treat you right he's this he's that and then I got back with him lol yeah hey so my friends hate you then I got back with him for the 17th time yeah then I got back with him literally for the sixth time that year all it did was create a wedge between me and my friends and

it meant that I didn't feel comfortable telling them everything about my relationship because I knew how they felt about him and I knew that they didn't like him and so it created a real rift and look eventually I ended up seeing that relationship for what it was eventually my eyes were open but they were never going to be open until I was ready to see that for myself I agree I think that you do need to let them play it out for themselves but I still do think that it's okay to say something when the opportunity arises and there is an opening if he has said something about things not going well you can jump in on that but you don't go in saying yeah she's a fucking mole you don't like that's not how the way you approach it you just say it really gently like I did notice

there was some stuff going on like the other day I noticed she said this to you or did this like are you okay with that or so you say it like you're caring and like you've just noticed these things but you can't go in you can't drag him out of bed and be like you need to get rid of that bitch no but you can also like I mean if you have seen that she's saying things that are not consistent with like or saying negative things about your family or whatever it is that you've seen her do firsthand that's made you feel uncomfortable you have absolutely right to say something to her as well like if she's embellishing stories or making up things or fabricating stuff like so long as it's if it's malicious if it's hurtful it's if it's harmful

then you have every opportunity to call out that behavior but if it is harmless and she's maybe big noting herself because she wants you to like her or she wants to be seen to be better than what she is like maybe she has some insecurity issues and this is a reflection of her personality and we can see it from a different perspective because you know I think there's definitely times when people are insecure don't feel good enough that they embellish who they are as a person because they want you to like them for sure and the family thing is a bit the only bit that gets me where i'm like yes you can say something or you can even ask him to say something anyone that came into my family and spoke about my family negatively i would have something to say

to 100 because that's very personal and very uncalled for and that's not the way you treat somebody that has welcomed you into their life. 100%. I mean, do we just agree? Do we just totally agree on this? No, we didn't because you were saying to tell him during a breakup. Okay, we didn't quite agree on this, but we're close enough. We're close enough.

Let's go on to question number three. Okay, so this is the other wedding one. This is an interesting one as well. Okay, one of my closest friends from high school is having her hands and getting married this year. Now, here's the thing. While I still have a lot of love and I wish her well, we just don't hang out much these days.

We don't talk a lot. I don't really know anyone going to the hens which is a few hours from where I live mind you and the wedding is even further away it's interstate. With the wedding I'm not keen on traveling by myself. To then stay somewhere by myself and then attend the wedding by myself it just doesn't feel right. To add to this my partner and I have been together the last couple of years but he's not even invited. Also when he met this friend of mine he didn't have the best experience and she was pretty rude to him so he isn't even keen to come if he was invited. I honestly just feel stressed even having been invited which is not how a wedding is supposed

to make you feel help what do I do do I go to the hens to be polite as it's more conveniently located to me but then not go to the wedding or do I not go to both I don't want to be an asshole but I don't want to fork out hundreds of dollars for both occasions when I'm trying really hard this year to save money and I feel like I would just be attending to be polite again we're not even that close anymore I love this question because I feel like this is something that so many people will experience at some point in their life like you know we all have those friends that we have fallen out of touch with who of course they want to keep like you want to keep that connection you want to like be able to say well yeah you're a really big part of my past so I

want you to be at my wedding because it would be weird for you to not be there but I think that this has probably happened to so many people oh all the time I have a number of friends I can thing off the top of my head that have been like oh I have to go to this hens I don't want to and I'm like why are you going then I just feel like I have to that's that's the response I feel like I have to but I think we get to a point there are definitely people in your life that like you have to front up for always yeah you have to front up for them if you want them to continue to be an active person in your life that's the that's the decision you have to make but in this case I think it's a big ask to ask anyone to travel interstate for a multitude of things what's already going to

cost you a fortune what's behind the not inviting the partner is that because of COVID or is that because she just doesn't want to pay for your partner because I have this funny thing with inviting partners to a wedding I think if you've been with someone for a long time they should be invited I would never invite half of a couple if you were my really good friend your partner is 100% invited unless it's COVID where they're like can only have 20 people I don't think that's a funny thing I think that that's like a normal thing it is right yeah it's it's it's weird even if you haven't spent much time with your friend's partner if you know that they have had a boyfriend for years and and you're really close with them and they're coming on their own like they don't

have like other friends in there to support them then I think like yeah you invite it to partners so I don't think every single person that you're inviting you have to invite their partners that's not what I think obviously if you've never ever met them and they've only been together for six months or something I think you're excused in inviting them when you know that they're coming with their group of friends you know they'll be okay because ultimately you're the one paying 200 ahead all of a sudden you're paying thousands of dollars for people that you've never met just so that they can have their partner there when someone's been together for years and you know that's it you know that's them forever you know they've got no other friendships then like yeah

dude you've got to invite them like you're doing i think you're doing the wrong thing unless it's obviously covid restrictions totally and it's one of those weird things right where you're like you're like i don't want to have someone in my wedding photos who is not going to be a part of your life in six months time. My mum got married a couple of years ago to her partner who she'd been with for 13 years. And I fucking hate that my ex is in them. I hate that my ex is in those photos. I remember that because you made, you weren't going to invite him, hey? I wasn't going to invite him. And he was hungover that day. He was, okay. He almost missed the wedding. He'd gone out on an absolute bender the night before. I rocked up at his house to come get him for my

mum's wedding. And he was passed out. I had to get the lobby, the doorman to come and open his apartment door to get him and then I finally got him in a suit dragged him down to Wollongong and he was the reason I was late for my mum's own like my mother's wedding I cannot even tell you how mad it makes me and then I got back with him the next day and then we dated for another five months but at the time our relationship was super volatile and I was like I really wanted it to work out but now I look back on those photos of my mum's wedding and I have deleted every single photo of him because he's not someone who I want to be reminded of he's not someone who I want to ever have real memories of but now he's in the most important photos of your mom's existence but I

cannot delete those photos so there are still photos in my phone and in my album that he's in and and I hate that I have that memory with him so I think like you know that's a very extreme example and clearly I have some trauma that I need to get over myself but I think it's okay as a bride and groom to not invite partners if you've been with that person for a short period of time and I think it's actually really rude if someone has invited you to their wedding and you've only been dating your boyfriend for a short period of time I think it's rude to reach out to the bride and groom and say hey can I bring my boyfriend you've never met him I've only been with him for six months but can you bring can I bring him yeah because that's hard on the bride

and groom then to have that conversation back and say well no totally and also means that like you know they probably have a limitation on numbers and if you have a partner like it doesn't mean that they're instantly entitled to come to every single wedding i think that there are some external circumstances to this especially in 2021 where there's covid restrictions there's number limitations and all that shit has to be taken into account i have a question yes i'm gonna put you on the spot your boyfriend can come to my wedding britney it's fine can i bring a plus one everybody because ben has my it's so funny that you knew what i was gonna ask yeah no i don't know if i'll have a boyfriend then but i'm just saying if i do can i bring a plus one please you should see this girl

she's glowing glowing that's not from what you think no no but also we haven't even answered this poor girl's question yet the actual question was no i literally have forgotten what the question is yeah because we did that thing where we pick one thing and go on and rant the actual question was do you have to go to either of these and the answer is no you we're at a stage we took that to a different place i know i know we did that thing where we went real off course but the ultimate answer is no like you're at a point where obviously you're not best friends with her as adults we don't have to do anything we don't want to do anymore and if you don't think the friendship is going to be that worthwhile and that strong in the future then I don't think you have

to go especially it's interstate it's COVID there are restrictions there's financial issues there are a lot going on there's actually a lot of ways for you to say that you cannot attend the wedding I 100% agree with you but I think that like Marie Kondo the shit out of your life guys if there is ever something that you don't want to do and and you feel anxious by the thought of being made to do it then that's your answer like do not do that and if you've taken the time to write to us to ask us if you have to go to your friend's wedding then the answer is no you don't have to go because you're obviously worked up about it you're stressed about it you're anxious about it and you know what fuck 2020 was stressful enough you don't need that and and like life is so

short and so limited time is really precious like you need to prioritize the things that are important to you and even if that means disappointing someone else I think the most important thing here to actually answer the question at hand is have a think how will your life feel and will you be okay if that person is not your friend in the next five years or ten years time or do you think they're probably not going to be your friend in five years ten years time anyway because you've already drifted apart so much that you don't need them or want them necessarily in your life in the same capacity that you had them in your life when you were at school or when you were growing up, that will be your answer.

That doesn't make you a bad person because your life has moved on and you're at a different point in time. But you will not feel great about yourself if you spend money on something, you go to something by yourself and you feel obligated into doing something, which should be a really fun and beautiful celebration if you don't want to be there anyway. The hardest part of this is the reason that you give to say no. That is probably the most stressful part is because you do have

to write to her and say, sorry, I can't attend. Now I was reading something recently and we're actually going to do an episode on it down the track, but I was reading about how to say no to people. The thing is, you don't even have to give them an excuse. You don't have to go down that track. You can literally write to them and say, thank you so much for the invite. I'm so sorry. I'm not going to be able to attend. I wish you guys so much happiness for this year and I hope it's the most amazing day. That's what you need to do. You don't have to, don't make up a lie. don't go into depth of why you can't come you keep it really nice and sweet you put it in the middle you don't give them any leeway if they come back and ask you why obviously you're going to

have to come up with something or think of something but that is actually the advice the professionals give when you want to say no you just say no you don't have to feel the guilt you don't have to make something up it's you just deliver it in a really nice way and you don't leave any opening for them to come and question it you know what a perfect example of this was um when I had Molly Mae's baby shower right we did a big ridiculous like very ostentatious super obnoxious I hate myself for it it was like a balloon frenzy baby shower it was very not you it was ridiculous like it was very Instagram and at the end of the day I was like I feel dirty I wish we hadn't done that I didn't even get to speak to my actual friends I was like it was not

this is not how I want to celebrate my child I had a ridiculously big baby shower and I invited all of my best friends and all of my close friends and probably some people who I don't really know um one of my closest friends Heather messaged me and she lives in the central coast and she was like I I can't come and she was like I'm you know she's like I want to be really transparent with you I love you I'm really excited about the fact that you're pregnant I can't wait to meet this baby but I don't want to drive down from central coast to be at a big big baby shower where I know I'm not going to get to speak to you or see you or really even have any time with you to then have to drive back to the central coast and feel like I've put all this time and energy into something

where we didn't even get to spend time together she was like I would much rather come down the next day for us to go out for lunch and for us to properly see each other she said that to me I thought about it and I was like am I offended by this I was like no I'm not I was so appreciative that she was honest and that she kind of was living her truth and she was being very authentically her and I was like that is exactly what I would expect from Heather I would hated for her to come down because she felt obligated to and then spent 15 minutes chatting to me and had to stand around making small talk to people who she didn't know I also get the fact though I like now that I'm thinking about it imagine though if every single person did that no one would come and you wouldn't

have a baby shower but it would never be the case right because you know you're always going to have people who are enthusiastic or who are um close by and available yeah and they're extroverts and they're you know they already are part of your integral close group of friends so they have friends there I think it's a bigger ask when it's one person who's an outlier who doesn't necessarily know all the rest of their friends and they're rocking up to an event by themselves like it's a big ask to expect someone to make small talk for an entire night or an entire day just to be there to celebrate something with you when you're not even going to get to see them yeah for sure so ultimately don't go don't yeah well that was big well like I'm glad that we

agreed a big roundabout way we answered lots of questions in that question that was very much unrelated to the question but still interesting but yeah look we're at we're at a stage in life guys especially when you hit your 30s where time is so precious and you really do need to just Marie Kondo the shit out of your life and you don't say yes to things that don't spark joy I'm still trying to think of my reason why I can't go to your wedding which please you'll be there front and center you'll be like I'll be saying a speech at the wedding i'll be the mc i will be podcasting i will be recording the event guys that is it from us today well it was supposed to be short and sharp and sweet but it actually wasn't that short sharp

and sweet it was a little bit short and sharper than normal please keep your questions coming in send them into the instagram on the insta web which is at life uncut podcast slide into the dms at the top put ask uncut also don't forget to send us your accidentally unfiltered or you can't believe they said that or any other funny weird and wonderful story that may be happening to you you can also join on the facebook on the podcast um we've got a great facebook group guys if you haven't already joined it it is a wonderful group of like-minded women and men i also love how many men have come out of the woodwork you guys are flourishing on there you're really finding your feet anyway guys you know the drill share the love no that was not it you know the drill

tell your mom tell your dad tell your dog tell your sister tell your cousin i don't know just Tell everyone. And share the love. Because we love love! We'll be right back.