Life Uncut - Ask Uncut - Will S3x Be Boring Because I Use My Vibe So Much?

Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode was recorded on Camaragal land. Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Brittany. And this is Ask Uncut, where we answer your deep, your dark, and your burning questions. Hey, huge news. Huge news. Laura's here, but is she really?

Starting point is 00:00:27 We don't know yet. I don't know. Do you have two kids or three? We can't be sure what is happening in this moment in time. So the reason why we say this is because technically this episode has been pre-recorded a little bit in advance just in case because this week is when I'm supposed to be having a baby. I am booked in for an induction. It is happening or it may have already happened.

Starting point is 00:00:48 We don't know. Well, yeah. Who knows if you've gone early? I just keep thinking my sister went five weeks early. So you just don't know. So we're like, we better get ahead of this just in case the little slippery sucker wants to slip right out. To be fair, for the last five weeks, I've been feeling like I've had the top of this

Starting point is 00:01:03 baby's head hanging out of my vagina. Like I have felt so much pressure. I'm not sure I needed that mental imagery to be honest. For five weeks. That's why I waddle. Because you know where my brain went? I'd love a head in my vagina right now. Ew.

Starting point is 00:01:14 No, but Ben's head. That's what I thought. Long distance, the whole thing. Continue as you were. Jesus Christ. Sorry, some of us don't live with their husband. That's true. I live with mine and I haven't had his head in my vagina in a long time.

Starting point is 00:01:27 Some of us want to be having sex still. Some of us are still in the honeymoon phase. I would love to know. Maybe we should do a poll on this because I know everyone's so. Who likes oral sex? Where's this poll going? What head would you rather? No, I would love to know like because everyone's very different

Starting point is 00:01:47 in terms of like when and for how long they feel comfortable having sex during pregnancy, right? Some people have sex up until the day. some people it's a no-go zone from weeks in advance mine's been different for each pregnancy I would love to know what was everyone's normal if you had a baby like at what point did you either stop or did you never stop but what's this pregnancy that means you're getting frisky because your other ones you don't really get frisky do no I had sex up until due date for the other ones which was really uncomfortable for me because Molly went to 42 weeks so I was

Starting point is 00:02:16 42 I was two weeks over and I was like get this baby out because they say that having sex brings definitely a man definitely was the person who spouted that fact you know that that's like a man-funded research study that was done wasn't it this is how this is what it looks like ready a man goes yes i have found out that you do need to have sex to bring on a baby sperm brings on labor in fact having sex the entire pregnancy ensures a safe baby well look for a reference around when this kid is due it should be this week if i'm not on wednesday's episode you know that I've already had a baby or potentially if I've been talking about it on socials I've already had a baby who knows we're really it's just a bit of a black hole at the moment are you excited

Starting point is 00:02:59 yeah anxious no but like not you don't have to be excited you might be stressed or anxious or nervous it doesn't mean you're not excited but like what's the overarching feeling what are the duplicious feelings that you're having yeah I'm excited well no I don't know see I knew if we dug a little deeper would get there. I don't know if I'm excited because I'm not Mother Earth birth. Like I'm not the person. You don't need to ground and be drug free in a pool and stuff. Yeah, I don't love childbirth.

Starting point is 00:03:29 I enjoy the euphoric feeling afterwards but I do kind of just think that it's because you've almost had a near-death experience and your body's just happy that it survived. Yeah, but I get that feeling from bungee jumping. I also get it from LSD but I haven't done that in a long time either. I also get it from mushrooms which I can't do for a while. Guys, I haven't done that since my 20s. I've never done mushies.

Starting point is 00:03:48 I'm almost 40. Have you? Never. No, never done mushies. Don't recommend it because that would get me in trouble, but it was a good time. I think the, haven't you? Gave it away.

Starting point is 00:03:58 To be honest. I think I need to do it because I have just been, this might surprise people. I know I give badass vibes. I'm such a goody-goody. Like, okay, the school curriculum when I was in year 10 brought in Anna's story. It did its job.

Starting point is 00:04:15 Do you remember Anna's story? I've forgotten Anna's story. Anna's story was like back when we were teenagers, long story short, Anna was a teenager, took a pill at a festival, overdosed and died. And her mum wrote a book about it and it got brought in as a school curriculum. Like you would read it and learn about it, but it did its job for me because I just got really, I just didn't want to die from a drug overdose and I'd never done drugs then and I never did drugs since.

Starting point is 00:04:40 And I just still remember, I'm like well played to Anna's mum because I reckon a lot of people did that but now I'm like mid to late 30s who knows how long I've got to live maybe maybe I need to try mushrooms I reckon if you've made it this far don't bother but before you go out like when you're like 80 just give it one last crack just get high what happens in the home I don't know I also am very wary about coming across as do you know what we're talking about pregnancy we're not promoting drugs on this podcast that's not what we do I actually did have a question if we can genuinely go back to the whole like sex in pregnancy situation have you ever been at a point where you've been having sex and you've like felt the baby move or

Starting point is 00:05:22 kick there's just a hand that grabs onto the penis oh no dude that's weird think through what you just said just think it through that's cooked put your claw down drop your claw I don't need the visual it didn't mean that much it just meant like a kick or something of your belly yeah that's why it's weird because it feels as though at this point it feels as though there's a third person in the room with you and I didn't really have that mentality when it was like Marley and Lola but this time around Poppy it does not stop moving like I guess let's just stick with the name it doesn't stop moving I don't know who knows I don't know anything anymore I shouldn't be here you should be giving birth I feel like we're all high today no I feel like she moves around so much that for

Starting point is 00:06:10 me it's quite distracting and I find it very uncomfortable during sex because I can't really concentrate on having a good time because all I'm thinking about is getting like kicked in the lung or in the scarring your child for life yeah no it's but it's also not pleasant for them like you've seen those scans where it shows you how much little things affect the baby at that point like how much you coughing what it does to the baby like in terms of I think it's fine no but it disrupts them because like it's they're so tight in there that like the diaphragm goes down things move and it's feeling the walls. So imagine if you just get it and pound down, the baby's like, oh, oh, oh. We need to move on. Okay. Sorry. You brought up the baby's hand

Starting point is 00:06:45 holding the, that's not even true. Okay. I'm going to put that poll out because I'm curious and I would love to know when people's limits were, but yes, I could have a baby in the world. We might not. Five to nine subscribes. Let's do it. All right. My vibe is a BBC podcast. It's something that you guys might have already seen on a documentary because it's been talked about for quite a while but I love the BBC podcast I've recommended before it is called World of Secrets so a little while ago I recommended this same podcast World of Secrets but in relation to this yoga teacher cult so this is going back maybe six months eight months that I recommended that in case you missed it so the World of Secrets is a series and they focus on each season is something

Starting point is 00:07:26 different but this is the Abercrombie guys so you guys know yeah so you've probably seen the doco on it but i really enjoyed the podcast version where they've gone to find i guess one of the guys that started the whole thing like one of the young guys that came out if you don't know what the abercrombie guys are the owners of abercrombie and fitch and how it actually was so predatory and all the things that went wrong within that industry some really similar story themes to the american apparel one that we also recommended a couple of weeks back which is the trainwreck episode series it's so interesting to me that these iconic brands of that era seem to all kind of be very muddied by the same types of claims and sexual assault stories and

Starting point is 00:08:07 like it's pretty gross yeah and i found it really fascinating i guess because it's it's a bit of the me too movement but focusing on the males that i think people overlook a lot of people think men don't experience the same thing as women do and to a sense of course they don't like it is not on par but in this sense it was young male models were preyed upon and horrific things happened to them it's interesting to hear the men that were involved come out and speak about it firsthand about that because there's quite a few people that ended up coming forward and i always take my hat off to these invested to give that's the one word i can never say investigative i always take my hat off to these investigative it is a hard word it's actually so far it's a hard word

Starting point is 00:08:52 These investigative. The journalists that investigate. Will you say it? Investigative. It's so, Keisha. Investigative. Investigative. Yeah, investigative.

Starting point is 00:09:05 I take my hat off to these journalists who dedicate years of their life to this one story. What type of journalist are they? Investigative journalists. She spent like two years chasing, like trying to get one person to come forward and speak. And, you know, when you hear of it like that, you're like, wow, I can't imagine dedicating so much time to uncovering something so important, but I found

Starting point is 00:09:25 it really, really interesting. So the podcast is BBC World of Secrets and the series is called The Abercrombie Guys. All right. I have an unsubscribe. It is a generic one, but it's one that I want you to hold with you and remember this the next time that you have a terrible fucking impulse purchase, overwhelming feeling that comes across you when you see a Facebook ad. so i recently bought something online and i am so guilty of this if i see a good facebook meta

Starting point is 00:09:53 ad that pops up on my phone i will be considering purchasing things that i never thought i needed i once bought i'm the worst i once bought a whole indoor fucking plant system that hangs by attention you construct it by tensioning this indoor plant it's called an indoor plant forest from the ceiling we remember it was a vibe i i never set it up like i've never used it you've No, because Matt banned it. Anyway, okay. She had to put a pulley system into the ceiling. Literally.

Starting point is 00:10:21 And I purchased it on a whim. Did not need it. I purchase from ads all the time. Okay, I bought something recently. It was ridiculously overpriced. I don't want to dox the brand because, like, there are many versions of this and they are all the same, but, like, this is kind of my most,

Starting point is 00:10:34 this is the most recent hill I'm going to die on. It's a massage thing that you use in the shower for lymphatic draining, right? Like, so it's a plastic silicone massage thing. You hate showers. Well, no, I like showers. I do them at least once a day. The problem is, is I received it, cost, you know,

Starting point is 00:10:50 over a hundred bucks for this fucking piece of silicon. In order for it to apparently be effective, you have to use it for five minutes per body part every single day. So if I want to do. Who has that time? Thank you. If I want to do both ass cheeks and the backs of my legs, that's 20 minutes in the shower.

Starting point is 00:11:05 I just, I'm going to stop you here. I think this is a you problem. I agree. You didn't, you didn't read the terms and conditions. No, the instructions aren't on the website. The instructions come in the back of the box. Yeah, but what did you think? You just went like once down your body and you're like.

Starting point is 00:11:17 Yeah, but I'm sure the ad didn't say this will take you half an hour per go. The thing is, is we are all, and I shouldn't say we all, but so many of us are guilty of buying things that we don't need because we are absolutely relentlessly targeted and we buy the lead light mask. You buy the fucking gua shua things. No, lead light works. I know, but there's so many versions of them, right?

Starting point is 00:11:36 And like I get that it works. I have one. I love my Omnilux mask, but like I don't need any other things. And I do sometimes find myself that I'm so easy to market to. I spend so, I shouldn't say I spend so, I'm so easy to market to. I spend money on things I don't need. And once it arrives, I use it for a week and then it goes in a cupboard and it's fucking irrelevant.

Starting point is 00:11:55 I just purchased last night, late at night on an ad, off the back of an ad. I'm embarrassed. Oh God. It's like a magnet light that sticks on your back of your phone and it like swivels. It's like a selfie light or a content light. so it like swivels out and then one side's got a mirror if you need it don't know why you need that but it's like a double whammy like the six on your phone you're a content creator though no the other one I got goes on the top that's my point from multiple angles that's my point

Starting point is 00:12:24 this unsubscribe is just consider the purchases that you're making and whether you're actually going to use these things as part of your every single day routine because there's so many things out there now that we're constantly being told we need to look this little bit better or this a little bit this oh it's just this one thing like are you gonna do a half an hour omnilux mask a fucking 20 minute lymphatic drainage system every day and if you're not gonna do that and make the time for it don't buy it because you're just gonna end up like me and it's all gonna sit in a cupboard and you're not gonna use it it's a pretty deep unsubscribe thank you I'm having an existential crisis no I'm just really mad at myself that I bought this and I like I bought

Starting point is 00:12:59 in I bought like the fucking oil and I bought the wash and then when it arrived I was like I'm never gonna spend 20 minutes in a shower doing this daily like this was such a waste of my money My vibe this week kind of fits in with this a little bit. It is a Substack article written by Kate Bowler, who's a writer, a podcast host, and a Duke professor. It's titled, Feeling Tired, Try Giving Up Your Purpose. Find your purpose, your calling, your destiny, preferably yesterday. So I'm just going to read this paragraph because I think it'll give you a pretty good synopsis

Starting point is 00:13:26 of the whole article. It starts with, the purpose-driven life is a powerful myth, the best-selling kind. It promises clarity, direction, and a straight path to meaning. but this relentless search for purpose has a cost as the boundaries between work identity and meaning blur the pressure to find fulfillment in every aspect of life can become overwhelming when every activity must be infused with significance even leisure and rest risk being recast as opportunities for self-optimization and she kind of went through the history of how this idea around purpose you know people would volunteer and there was all this acts of service and service to people and

Starting point is 00:14:02 find your purpose in service and you have to find one purpose. There was a book that sold over 50 million copies that was about this. It was like on everybody's bookshelf. And it changed the way that a lot of us thought about having to have one identified big purpose and what was the point of work and what was the point of us being here, you know, these big existential questions. And she kind of breaks down in the fact that for a lot of us, we won't have one purpose in life. We may have many, many, many smaller ones and this idea of like needing to have this one purpose, you know, work can't just be to earn a salary anymore. You have to get purpose from it.

Starting point is 00:14:41 You have to be finding your calling and, you know, doing something that's in line with you. And for a lot of people, that's just not realistic. Like for a lot of people, they just have to go to work to provide for their fucking family. Or a spiritual purpose or meditate or manifest or do something else. Purpose is important. A hundred percent. I think everyone needs a purpose, but it's like a soulmate.

Starting point is 00:15:00 there's not just one well yeah that was kind of what she spoke about she wasn't saying that you should just give up on having any purpose whatsoever what's the point it was more about finding smaller things that you have in your life to be purposeful you know so instead of needing this one overarching purpose and that was your life purpose you know your life actually might be made up of many little purposes and that creates a really big sense of purpose in your life so it was a really good article I felt like it was just one that I was like oh this is kind of countercultural and I really enjoyed it. It's by Kate Bowler and it will be linked in the show notes and on our website as well as all of our vibes are. All right, let's get into the questions.

Starting point is 00:15:41 Question number one. Will sex be boring because I use my vibe so much? My last relationship, which was also my first relationship, lasted for about two years and it didn't end badly at all. During that time, I never finished. She never came, which was a bit annoying. Oh, that's hectic. Imagine being strung along by your own vagina for fucking two years. But we were both young and at times – What's wrong with you today? I'm not going to be here for a while.

Starting point is 00:16:05 Yeah, I can tell. Fucking I'm out of here. Fucking tap that clod. See you all. So sorry, everyone. Okay, I had never experienced an orgasm so I didn't know if I could. Fast forward to now, I am currently single and my vibrator has since proved me that my body is absolutely most definitely capable of it.

Starting point is 00:16:25 But now I'm a bit worried that using my vibrator so frequently, I'd say three to five times a week, is going to make sex in the future kind of boring. I'll get lazy. Won't be able to finish during sex without it if I get so used to using it. I guess my question is, do I need to stop relying on it and find other ways so I don't become reliant on it and be lazy during sex in the future?

Starting point is 00:16:46 Girlfriend, just smash that vibrator. Enjoy your life. You live once. you don't know when your next relationship's coming but also okay hear me out sorry the potential of having bad sex isn't a reason to stop using your vibrator because you might be lazy you should vibrate as much as you want but work on the sex as well i wish i found my vibrator sooner i wish i knew i wish i'd even explored that as an option yeah no there's absolutely nothing wrong with that and if you're worried about it making you lazy then like that's a you problem but you

Starting point is 00:17:18 need to work on sex with your partner because you've realized now you had one relationship where you you couldn't orgasm and you thought you're in that percentage of people that can't because there are a percentage of people that can't you figured out that in fact you can good for you so it just means that you've got to work on that with your partner because every single like no one is cut from the same cloth no one everyone needs something different people's bodies respond differently to different things the way somebody gives you that and what they bring to the bedroom is different you just need to have a conversation and work it out with your partner until you figure out what works but I think this isn't one or the other it doesn't have

Starting point is 00:17:56 to be like I'm having bad sex I can only use my vibrator I'm having good sex I don't need my vibrator do I want good sex do I stop my vibrator like they can run concurrently like have as much sex as you want have the great sex alone have the great sex with your partner also I mean I think it's important to add you don't have a partner at the moment like you're single you just said my last relationship was for two years I didn't come at all now I'm single and I'm using my vibrator loads and I've discovered that I can have an orgasm the thing is firstly it is amazing that you've discovered this and like unfortunate for you that you were in a two-year relationship where you were having sex that was probably subpar the pleasure that you are able to enjoy and that's

Starting point is 00:18:36 because you both were inexperienced and that's totally fine like you know that's normal we're all inexperienced the thing is now you know your body better you're going to be better asking for what you want when you're having sex when you're having sex with someone and they're not doing the things that you know you need in order to get off i hope that it's not just a point of like understanding what your body needs but not being confident enough to communicate it because that's the most important part right but also you you can use your vibrator in the sex with your partner show them so that you can do both simultaneously totally and look don't get me wrong if you were spending all day every day masturbating not going to work because you're just

Starting point is 00:19:11 hucking, hitting the bean and having a good time. So five times a week's a lot. I'm wondering how much spare time you got. But then I, no, I mean, I guess it's like most nights before she probably goes to bed. I'm not going to yuck that yum. I don't know. I'm not yucking it.

Starting point is 00:19:23 I envy it. I don't have the energy five nights a week. I'm like, that's me. Put my electric blanket on and that's the only warmth I'm getting. But I would say like, I mean, if you were doing it so frequently where masturbation in general takes away from being able to enjoy pleasure when you're having sex, that's a different story. but I don't think that using a vibrator three to five times a week and being able to get yourself

Starting point is 00:19:44 off easily is going to inhibit you from having good sex later on I just really hope that you get to a point where you are able to communicate what feels good for you so the next time you go into a relationship with someone and you guys are potentially in a situation where you're not getting off from that sex you're able to say hey can I bring my vibrator into the bed or this is what I need you to do to get me to where I need to be so that you're not relying on it I think it's fine go for gold girlfriend you're having a great time don't punish yourself don't you know what don't feel guilty about the fact that you're having a great time with your vibrator life is short absolutely live it flick it bang it that's our motto here live it flick it bang it all right

Starting point is 00:20:26 all right I found AI porn on my nephew's computer oh dear what do I do with this information do I tell his folks hear me out while providing tech support to my 12 year old nephew so young yeah i have found out that he has been accessing porn websites including an ai porn game and an ai girlfriend generator website that is so scary to me actually like just stopping down that's insane the age 12 feels too young and that the fact that they're not even having i mean i don't know what's better i mean real life connection in terms of just with friends but like the fact that you know enough to go and have an ai created girlfriend the thing that's so alarming about this is i mean obviously most of us know like the age reference but like 12 you're in primary school that is a

Starting point is 00:21:14 primary school child who is accessing this who is seeing this highly adult orientated content it's fucking frightening all right well they continue on i am unsure what to do if anything at all i acknowledge the raging hormones and curiosity in preteens but i want to make sure he's not accessing content that encourages misogyny i have no children of my own and i don't know how best to deal with this should i talk to his parents or just let sleeping dogs lie i don't feel comfortable talking directly to him as it might embarrass him thank you in advance love the pod so as a parent my very first response to this is you have to tell his parents yeah they cannot parent the things that they don't know and if they have been providing him with unsupervised

Starting point is 00:22:02 access to the internet or to laptops or whatever it is they need to be really really aware of what it is that their kids are accessing because they obviously think that you know he's too they probably think he's too young they probably think he has no idea about that world and I'm sure that they would be absolutely mortified not at him because he's a child but at themselves that they hadn't done more to protect him in this environment you've got to give them the opportunity to be able to correct this behavior to be able to have conversations with him and more so than correct the behavior to keep him safe because if he's having this unfettered access to the internet and he's looking up this sort of stuff it also opens him up to being totally exploited

Starting point is 00:22:44 in chat forums or in different environments where predators could access him like it's just so fucking frightening this is not for you to keep a secret or for you to you know try and manage you just need to go straight to the parents and talk about it yeah i tried to put myself in this situation too as like an auntie to many nieces and nephews and no kids of my own so exactly like you i would absolutely be telling the parents because he is far too young he is a child he is 12 years sold although it makes me feel devastated but my brain went straight to what you just said Laura my brain went to not necessarily that because kids that age are going to look at porn and I guess porn has changed you know it's AI porn kids were always looking at porn around 12 and 13 like

Starting point is 00:23:32 they were seeing magazines and stuff so it's just a modern day version and I'm not saying it's okay but my brain sort of skipped straight past that and went to what else is he accessing and what other predators is he meeting with or I don't say meeting with but talking to or that have access to him. That is my absolute main issue. But I also understand why you're worried about the misogyny or the things that could come from that because 12 is so impressionable. Totally. That is a formative years in all aspects of your life. And if this is where you're getting your knowledge of what relationships are, what sex is like, for starters, it's not even a real person.

Starting point is 00:24:06 So there's an issue in itself in that. It says that he's accessing porn websites, including AI porn and AI girlfriend generators. So he is actually accessing normal porn as well. Yeah, it's extremely problematic. I wouldn't think twice about it. I would let the parents know and then they can decide what to do. But oh my God, I even feel uncomfortable if I was a parent. How do you even have that conversation?

Starting point is 00:24:25 No, I think parents, look, you can always seek advice on how to have it, but it's so important. I think sometimes we think that our kids are not at the place or the stage of development that they are at. And what I mean by that is, is like, you know, you always kind of see your child as being a child and they are, they're 12, they're a baby, but the ways in which 12-year-olds and 13-year-olds, the things that they have access to, the things that their friends talk about, all it takes is for another 12-year-old at school to have an older brother and sister

Starting point is 00:24:53 have seen some of this stuff and then they come to school and they're talking about it. So you as a parent, and I really deeply believe this, I think you always have to be on the front foot. You always have to be the one that's had the conversation with them before the kids do and not just assume that because they're young that they don't have any access to this stuff. you've got to obviously make it age appropriate and do it in a way that's like you're not scaring them or exposing them to more things than what they might not be aware about. But I think it's a really tricky thing to manage and it's not for an auntie to manage. It is absolutely for the

Starting point is 00:25:23 parents to be across. You know what the problem is too? It's like, you know, so most of the parents that we are talking to now and that are listening, you know, grew up in our generation, give or take 10 years you know older but they grew up in our generation and I guess a lot of us look at and I do the same with my nieces and nephews you look at them and you sort of think about it like you relate it to when you were that age but you can't do that because when we were 12 it is different to 12 year olds now we didn't have access the internet wasn't around you it was easier to be protected and you had access to things a lot slower you had to come across real life situations but now kids have access to anything at any age like if you're letting your eight-year-old go on

Starting point is 00:26:08 use youtube they are have access to things that they should absolutely not have access to so you can't you can't relate a 12 year old now to a 12 year old when we were 12 also like when when you say like when we were kids that we could see porn but the porn was like limited it was limited to a magazine it was limited to like you know maybe the front of a dvd cover that when you went into or see not even DVD it was like a VCR cover when you went to Video Easy like it was such a specific type of porn whereas now the internet is just anything and everything and I really maybe this is some parents would disagree with this and maybe I seem very skeptical in saying this I love my children I trust them but I don't trust them at the same time I don't trust that they're

Starting point is 00:26:52 not going to push the boundaries and so I think as a parent it's our responsibility to make sure that those boundaries are tight and that you're thinking about, okay, I know that they have unsupervised access to the internet. Then I need to assume that they're doing stuff because they're a kid and they want to, you know, they're curious. They want to find stuff out. If they've got unlimited access to the internet, they're going to be looking at the things that they think they can get away with. Kids know how to delete, explore history. Now kids know how to delete photos on iPhones. Like Marley is six. She has never been taught how to use an iPhone. She's only observed us doing it. She doesn't use an iPhone. She obviously doesn't have one.

Starting point is 00:27:32 And I found out recently that she knew that you could take photos and you could delete them, which to me, I was like, for a six-year-old, why would you even know or need to, or need to delete photos? Exactly. Like, why is that something that should exist? And every so often she'll take our phone and be like, I'm going to take photos. And she's taking photos, you know, around the house or the plant or the dog or whatever but the concept to me of like okay now that you know you can delete stuff you also know you can get away with stuff so then you know it kind of prompted me to go and check well what is it that you think you need to delete that I can't see because she might not know about this delete folder yet yeah she doesn't know the delete folder exists we had

Starting point is 00:28:06 a big conversation around the fact that like things you do on phones and things you do on the internet will always be there and other people will always be able to find that stuff and I think that was like you know an age-appropriate way of having a conversation around a bigger concept when it comes to the internet but this is really fucking scary and 12 is just such a baby to be exposed to all of that horrible stuff that's why there needs to be so many more laws around porn and accessing like age-appropriate porn and having like over 18s and all that sort of stuff like it needs to come into effect it's just they have that stuff it's just the internet no pirate stuff and rip it then it goes on to another web page that has access to

Starting point is 00:28:43 anyone or totally but in australia look i mean this is the big thing it's been pushed for years and there's legislation that's going through government at the moment like why with everything that we have in this country and the ability for rules and procedures and policies to be implemented why do they not have a verified age vetting on all pornography sites so that if you're accessing it you don't just click yes i'm over 18 you have to submit your license you have to submit your details also then you will know people who are looking at things that are absolutely fucking abominable because people will be traceable by their ip addresses like i think yeah but i don't know if i believe in that either i don't think that we as people should be policed to the point

Starting point is 00:29:21 that we're like hey fred from down the road looked at porn last night like i understand it to set rules for age appropriateness but we shouldn't be able to be tracked for every single thing we put into a google search as well i agree but what if the things that you're searching are like things that elicit to child porn do you know a hundred percent this is why it's a problem because of course we need it for that but the average joe blow that just wants to go and look at porn doesn't want the government to know every single thing he looks at like it's it wears the line and i understand it that something needs to change for that reason but like generally speaking we can't have a government watch for every single thing that

Starting point is 00:29:55 we put in like they already fucking watch everything that we do so i understand both arguments it's fucking tricky it would be an interesting one to unpack one day like with more yeah details around how they're going to manage that in the future yeah all right next question i don't know how i feel about this one my boyfriend gets turned on by crying so now i can't get emotional or cry hear me out my boyfriend and i were discussing our turn-ons one day in the early days he told me how when his partner cries it gets him a little bit aroused he says he can be empathetic and he never or has never acted on it i am someone who likes to discuss my mental health struggles with my partner, cry, chat about it and move forward. But now I find myself unable to cry

Starting point is 00:30:37 in front of him, which is now leading to an issue because I'm bottling things up when I'm around him. Any help or suggestions would be great because he's incredible. He is my penguin, someone I've gone through a crappy marriage and many toxic relationships to find. Now I'm not viewing this as something that will break the relationship. I just don't know how to move past this so that I can let the floodgates open up and move on before it seriously affects me so the problem is you want the floodgates opening from the eyeballs but not the vagina yeah less vagina floodgates this is what a weird king to be like when my partner is emotional and vulnerable I want to know do you know what I actually probably think if you dug into that I don't think it's that weird I think

Starting point is 00:31:20 it would come into like a protection thing like it's vulnerable and you want to look after them or whatever I don't think it's probably that weird it's a little bit weird if it's to the extreme where like you are talking about something quite serious and dark and deep and crying and he's just got a raging boner. Like if he can't control himself, it's weird. But also if it's just turning him on as in like, fuck, I just want to look after you and I love you and whatever. I don't think you should bottle it in.

Starting point is 00:31:44 What do you do though? Well, no, because people, just because you're turned on doesn't mean you have to fuck. Like he can control that unless you're not crying and he's like a big giant boner. I think that he needs to control that. And people get turned on for different things all the time and it doesn't mean you have to, like, drop your pants

Starting point is 00:32:00 and do the deed right then and there. Like, you can definitely need to tell him that you feel uncomfortable crying because you're worried he's going to want to have sex. Like, I think it's, you know, I don't think you need to break up with him for it and I don't think you need to bottle it up. But maybe if it's something you've got to be far more emotional about, you talk to someone else about it. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:32:21 It depends how much you can control these impulses. Look, he has said, and you have said it in your question itself, he says that he can still be empathetic and he has never and will never act on it yeah that's good like at least he has self-control do you know what i mean but it would be disconcerting to be quite upset about something just combobulating yeah i'm wanting to talk about it with your partner and always thinking i'm getting upset by here we go again i know well because i think the bigger thing is and like to kind of unpack it on a deeper level is like it's invalidating right like you're there talking about something that's really you want your partner

Starting point is 00:32:57 to be able to understand your feelings you want your partner to be on a level with you where they're able to communicate about the thing that's making you upset or whatever that looks like and all you're now thinking is like well if i'm crying he's gonna want a bone and that's just like it's a totally inappropriate reaction for that environment and setting like your grandma just died and he's like oh you're so hot right now literally right it's weird but this is the problem is though is like unless you actually have a conversation with him about it you're probably always going to feel a little bit like well if I cry is he is that is that what he's thinking even if he doesn't do it is that what he's thinking now I don't know what the solution is to this

Starting point is 00:33:35 unless it's like talk it out my other thing is maybe this is going to come back and bite me on the ass because in no way do I want to kink Shane that's not what I'm doing here but I do want to ask the question if you have a kink that you're never ever ever going to act on because you know that it's socially not either the norm or could be perceived as inappropriate why tell someone because all that does then is gives them the burden of them trying to like deal with the fact that you have this sexual kink that impacts them but you're never going to act on it but you're thinking about it but then it's like is everything needed to be discussed in a relationship should then there be some stuff we keep to ourselves yeah but maybe if it's an extreme kink i think

Starting point is 00:34:16 this is different i don't think it's a kink they just should have said in our early days we were saying hey what turns you on he's obviously been like hey sometimes when people cry i get turned on i don't i don't reckon it was that i don't think they thought about it that much i don't think it's a kink as such but there's a definite difference between a turn on and a kink that's like he's not taking a dump on a chest but he's but he's you know he was open and vulnerable with you and said that when someone cries that it turns him on i i don't think it's the end of the world and you've said he's not going to do anything about it i'd just talk to him about it and maybe he can put your mind at ease a little bit and say like you're overthinking it like I don't want to

Starting point is 00:34:51 ravage you every time you cry like maybe he'll explain it a bit more I think he has a vulnerability kink I think that's what it is yeah like I think it's common not necessarily the tears part but that wanting to look after somebody is a really common thing with men like when someone like the broken bird syndrome some women do it as well I mean that was in my 20s yeah women loads of women Give me a man that's a fixer-upper project and I will take him. But men do it too. And let him destroy me. In every way.

Starting point is 00:35:20 Literally. Literally, physically, metaphorically. I cried a lot. I'm pretty sure that crying also turned my exes on when I think about it. Yeah, see? I think it comes back to this like I'm a protector. I'm masculine. I'm doing my job.

Starting point is 00:35:31 I'm looking after you. And maybe I'm looking too much into it now. But, yeah, I wouldn't say it's the actual liquid tear that does it. I think it's the surrounding deeper meaning. I think a few conversations need to be had. All right, last question. All right, last question. This is hectic.

Starting point is 00:35:47 This is like the most hectic question in a way, besides the woman falling pregnant to her cousin when she cheated on her husband. This is like a different kind of hectic. What about the woman who fell pregnant during a threesome and it wasn't to her partner? That's one under the cousin pregnancy. And then this one comes under that. What about the dad sniffing?

Starting point is 00:36:05 What about the father-in-law who was caught sniffing his son's wife's vibrator? Yeah. That was probably the most hectic question we've ever had. That was cooked. That was proper cooked. This is hectic for a different reason because it's like, I mean, could be illegal. Hashtag mushroom gate. Have a listen to this.

Starting point is 00:36:21 Is my mother-in-law poisoning me? If you think so, probably yes. I have been with my partner for three years and he has been nothing short of amazing. He's taught me the real definition of love and I could see myself with him long term. The one thing I really struggle with is his mother-in-law who can be very opinionated and I'm slightly convinced has it out for me. I was recently, I'm not slightly, I'm convinced. I was recently sick with a cold and I just couldn't seem to shake it off. So she mailed me through some vitamins in inverted commas, along with a list of when to take them and how many to

Starting point is 00:36:56 take each day. I thought this was really nice. So I took them without hesitation. After about four days of taking them, I was at work with horrible stomach cramps. It was vomiting. I was really unwell. So it turns out the vitamins that she had given me were actually medication that doctors used to treat scabies and ringworm. And she was giving me four times the dosage of what doctors would prescribe when they prescribed these things. That's so, that's so intense. The doctor said I was really lucky to have only been vomiting as it could have been a lot worse. Once she found out how sick I was, she kept trying to contact me to discuss my symptoms, but I just kept declining the call as I was extremely upset about everything. My partner has now told me that I should

Starting point is 00:37:38 ring her and apologize for ignoring her phone calls and that I should be keeping the peace. Am I in the wrong for not wanting to keep the peace with my mother-in-law after something like this? And is it worth being with my partner when I absolutely cannot stand her? P.S. My mother-in-law isn't a doctor and I have no idea where the hell she got these medications from in the first place. Look, we did a bit of a deep dive on this one because, I mean, firstly, we don't know exactly what it was that your mother-in-law has given you, but from a bit of research that we all did, because, you know, none of us are doctors and none of us are scientists, but it looks like it was probably a thing called ivermectin, which I think is really

Starting point is 00:38:16 interesting because this is something that was touted during COVID and people were taking because it was said to help alleviate COVID symptoms. so ivermectin is kind of a little bit controversial but there is other reasons why people take it beyond just ringworm and scabies now the question is here is your mother intentionally or mother-in-law intentionally trying to poison you i don't think so i think she's probably quite woo-woo and thought that this is like this you know underground treatment that was going to help you get over all of the things that had similar characteristics to covid asking if your mother-in-law is poisoning you is like a pretty big thing. I would be giving her the benefit of the doubt that maybe she

Starting point is 00:38:54 actually genuinely thought she was sending you something that was going to help you with your flu symptoms when you said you couldn't shake it. But I think maybe have a conversation with her. I know you're avoiding her calls. Maybe you're conflict avoidant. I am very conflict avoidant as well. But I think having this conversation with her, not accusatory, but talking her through what it was and asking her why she sent that and where she got those doses from because it's made you really ill, I think it's important you tell her how ill it has made you because she might be sending that out to all the friends. She might be giving it to loads of people, but that conversation I think will tell you a lot, the way she responds, the way she gives you the information. Like

Starting point is 00:39:32 people have good gut instincts, right? And I'm definitely not going to say she's not poisoning you. We don't know. We've just gone and seen the mushroom case, you know, in Australia, Erin Patterson. We're not saying that that's what this is, but we can't say that it's crazy because obviously it has happened, I would be giving her the benefit of the doubt, but I wouldn't be giving her the benefit of the doubt without talking to her. I would be trying to figure what the fuck is going on. Yeah, I would have all those conversations too,

Starting point is 00:39:58 but I think also there's a pretty fucking big lesson here, everyone. Don't take medication from random people who are not doctors. Whether it's a vitamin or it's something that's prescribed or not prescribed, there is no way in hell that I would be taking medication that Ellie gave me on a whim and gave me the dosage amounts without doing my own research and looking that up because as you said she's not a doctor so I don't think she's tried to do it in a covert way she's been very overt she's sent you something she's given you the dosage I think we have to take some personal responsibility as well and be like okay well what is it that I'm being

Starting point is 00:40:31 recommended to take well the other thing here is just that we haven't touched on but we should before we check out of here is is it worth being with my partner when I can't stand his mother that's a pretty big question I would love to say that it shouldn't affect your relationship and it you know and I'm going to talk more broadly here not just your situation at the end of the day it depends on what the relationship is and how awful that person is and how much they stick themselves in your life and disrupt your life what they're doing how manipulative they are how rude they are is it truly truly something that you can't you know have a relationship without them being involved then yeah that is a question that you need to ask yourself but I think if it's the love of your

Starting point is 00:41:10 life I wouldn't just be breaking up with him because you've got these issues with the mother-in-law like you can have those conversations with him and let him know why she's such a problem for you and obviously you've talked about it in some sense because he's like you need to go and make up and make this better but maybe he doesn't quite understand your feelings surrounding it and I'm assuming there's a lot more going on yeah just this because for you to even jump like for you to jump to the conclusion that she could have poisoned you intentionally there's got to be a load of other stuff surrounding that like that's not someone's first go-to and it's not a normal train of thought like it's not if my mother-in-law sent me something and I got sick you wouldn't

Starting point is 00:41:52 think she's trying to poison me I'd be like oh my god like you made me wildly unwell like what was that yeah I don't know like that's not my first train of thought totally and also that I mean you kind of just said it just then but am I in the wrong for not wanting to keep the peace with my mother-in-law after something like this you're not in the wrong you don't need to call her and apologize as your partner's suggesting but you do need to talk to her like you can't just ignore it and be like you fucked up you sent me something that made me sick yeah because there is a personal responsibility here where you took the thing like you took it blindly because you just assumed that your mother-in-law who has no medical experience would send you something that's going to fix you

Starting point is 00:42:26 like that to me is weird as well so I think like having a phone call where you're like hey that whatever you sent was really really dicey and it really really affected me please just know that that's not something to send she will probably be mortified unless she's a psychopath and she's trying to kill you like but i think you could get yourself into a situation in this where you are actually the one in the wrong especially if you use this as like verbatim and gospel that she's trying to kill you and then secondly the that big question of is it worth being with my partner when I can't stand his mother-in-law you obviously already can't stand her only you can decide what impact she's having on your relationship and there are many people who are in happy

Starting point is 00:43:05 relationships with their husbands or with their wives and they fucking can't stand their in-laws and there are many people who are not so that unfortunately is so subjective it's impossible to answer good luck godspeed stay well don't take anything do not go for any dinners at your mother-in-law's house make sure that the plates are all matching in color byo your own food or when they put the plate down in front of you swap it yeah see if they eat it back out yours looks good i'll have yours ask her to eat a mouthful of your plate first every time you go for dinner at her house that's one way to deteriorate a relationship with it hey let's get out of here please keep your ask uncuts coming in you're accidentally unfiltered just send them into

Starting point is 00:43:42 instagram to life uncut podcast and we have youtube now you're going to want to put it on hit subscribe, watch it with your partners, chat it out. What would you do? Would you be thinking your mother-in-law's poisoning you or not? And I could be pushing a baby out of my hoo-ha right now. Just if you want to think about that. We'll live stream it. Pray for Laura. We have hooked up a live stream. Would you guys want to watch a live stream of my birth? Should we do it? Keisha's so keen for a live stream of anything. She tried to live stream my wedding. Keisha's been pushing for a live stream for so long. How would like a vaginal birth go for you, Keisha? Do you want to be in the room you want to be the one to film it we'd get the numbers it'd get taken down

Starting point is 00:44:18 you can't put that stuff on youtube but it's not it's not sexually explicit it's a it's a beautiful birth from the side we had a nipple taken down recently did we yeah angela white the number one porn star we let a nipple slip into the youtube not not an actual nipple the word nipple no it was a nipple no her nipple was in it why was her nipple in there sorry i've just come and jumped back on my it was a picture that was advertising you know when when we talk about things even for our vibes of today's episode it will go up on and ness will put a picture of it so that people know what it looks like she was talking about the movie the film that she had made and she had like a netted dress on and yeah there was sorry who thought that putting a real nipple

Starting point is 00:44:57 on the youtube was ever gonna be an accident vanessa video editor ness she's into nipples wow she's into nipples yeah yeah still a problem men can have their nipples on there why can't we why can't Angela part of me is like why not like I don't think Matt would agree I don't think no I don't mean the nipples thing I mean live streaming the birth part of me is like I think Matt would think it would be weird but like no you're not live stream I mean I don't care okay fucking live stream it then but we've got to pay for it paid subscription we're putting it behind a paywall sorry are we splitting my live birth 50 50 yeah this is my company too.

Starting point is 00:45:32 100%. Do I just get paid per hour? Yes. Keisha, you're paid per hour. You get paid a bonus, but you've got to be pretty steady with your head if you're going to be in there and live stream this shit. You know how we talk about how everyone has such a desire for short form content now? That just to me feels like it could be 40 minutes or it could be like four and a half

Starting point is 00:45:49 hours. It could be a day. I can't guarantee how long it's going to take. Marley's was eight hours, but look, it was fine because I had an epidural and I was in juice. So, like, the first five hours were nothing. If you were to live stream it, stop. Just let's do it.

Starting point is 00:46:01 If you're doing it, let's do it. Let's double down right now. Are you going to do it? I don't know. I have to talk to Matt first. Oh, look, I knew if I called her she'd buy it. But, like, she's thinking about it. I'm thinking about it.

Starting point is 00:46:09 She's like, how much money could I make? No, no, no. I mean, I would do it for free. No, you can't do it for free. If you're putting your birth on, you've got to make something from it. Nah, just for shits and giggles. And man would. I would do it for the education.

Starting point is 00:46:22 Okay, I'll set up the paywall. I would do it for the education piece of, like, birthing. They're already out there. There's lots of birth videos. You're giving your story out. You pay all that. I'm sorry. I'm not letting you live stream your birth for free.

Starting point is 00:46:35 I'm just not going to do it. We should talk about this off mic anyway. That's it from us, guys. I'm going to go have babies. Like, I love the life. Join my channel. You may or may not see it. Join my channel.

Starting point is 00:46:43 Join my channel. Join the YouTube. You might see Laura's birth soon. Yeah, maybe. For free or not for free. Who knows? There's a lot going on down there. Well, good luck, Laura, if you're in birth right now.

Starting point is 00:46:53 and you're listening to this episode. Good luck. Thanks. We can't wait to meet maybe Poppy. Or Polly or Penny, who bloody knows. Yeah. All right, you know the drill. Bye.

Starting point is 00:47:04 Tell your dog to tell your friends and share the love because we love love.

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