Life Uncut - Coming out Rebel style 🌈 and Toxic Masculinity

Episode Date: June 13, 2022

Hey Lifers,Firstly today we are jumping in with some passionate feelings about Rebel Wilson's relationship announcement and who has the right to a story. Spoiler alert, Noone but the person involved has that right! Regardless of celebrity status, every individual has the right to come out or talk about any new relationship in their lives when they are ready.End. Of. Story. The original article in the Sydney Morning Herald has been removed but their apology statement can be read here: https://www.smh.com.au/culture/celebrity/rebel-starts-spreading-the-news-of-relationship-20220610-p5aswa.htmlNext up, we're taking a deep dive on toxic masculinity with radio host Will McMahon. You might know Will from Will and Woody or even celebrity apprentice, where he has spoken openly about his experiences with depression and how it has been impacted by toxic masculinity.We touch on how toxic masculinity isn't specific to men, and actually affects every one of us, where it stems from, what it looks like in the real world and what we can do about it to change it on an individual and a societal level.There's some big stuff in today's episode and if you liked it, we'd love a sneaky little review on apple podcasts and spotify. Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell you friend and share the love because we love love, and love is love! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders, past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. This episode is recorded on Gadigal land of the Aurora Nation. Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. And I'm Brittany.

And Brittany, well, we have a very, very interesting episode for you guys today. There is something I wanted to ask you first, Britt. I don't know why I'm giggling like a nervous schoolgirl. Well, because you always bring me with these like, I've got something I want to know. and I'm always like, I don't know where to go with this. Well, it's because it's got to do with dating. So I want your opinion.

Is it what not to do? Because I can tell you that. You're like, I've got 10 years of experience of what not to do with dating. Always too fucking soon. Don't ask me how to do it. No, I was having this conversation on the weekend who needed some dating advice

and I gave my dating advice to which she told me it was fucking wrong. So that's why. So she asked you for the advice. You gave her your best response. Then she was like, thank you, next. She looked at me like, you have clearly been out of the dating game for so long. She's like, can you phone a friend? Can

you phone Brittany? Your advice is irrelevant. What was it? She's been dating someone for about four weeks, right? Casually dating, but really likes them. How many times a week? What's the average? I think like two, well, it started off like one or two. Now it's gone up to about three times a week that they're seeing each other. Okay. Maybe 11 times. I'm just trying to, I'm just trying to get a head around my head around this. They've hung out 11 times. They've had sex like things are progressing she really likes him but there has been no conversation about what they are and she said like what is the appropriate time frame like how many weeks go past before you should bring up like what are we are we exclusive where is this heading and I was like now

one month like you are so deep in that that if you're feeling it already you might as well have the conversation and she looked at me like I had been drinking the kool-aid I think this is very subjective because I'm going to say something and I can't believe I'm going to say this you gave me different advice recently so I was I've dated one person yeah that was because I didn't think you should date him that was why the advice was don't make it exclusive it had nothing to do with time frame it more had to do with situation I had yeah let me say I had dated someone only one person you know since my breakup and we were only probably four weeks into very casually dating and he got that feels great Laura was like no it's only been a month it's too soon I'm not feeling this it's

like it's all hectic you gotta play like not you gotta play cool but it's like too much too soon but if you loved him or the situation you would have been exactly that you would have said yeah a month's great go for it get into it but it's because you didn't like us no okay yes on one hand you have a point but on the other hand my thing is not so much about like making it exclusive you don't have to at the one month mark be like hey are you my boyfriend are we going to be boyfriend and girlfriend more so just around like what is this what do you what do you want out of this and having like an if you haven't had that conversation by the month mark what are you afraid of are you afraid that they're going to say I don't want anything this is just super casual

and it's not going anywhere in which case you then would have to make the decision as to whether you want to keep seeing them or not I think by the one month mark of like hanging out going on a few dates getting to know a person if you want something that's exclusive if you want it to go in that direction then that's probably about the time that you have to like put on your big girl panties and say where do you think this is heading because I would like this to be a little bit less ambiguous yes but I think it's I don't think there's a time frame okay and I really really don't and I know this isn't the advice anyone needs but when I was with Jordan we said we loved each other after a month. Like we were just obsessed. I have dated other people for six

months. They've said to me, what are we? And I'm like, well, it depends on the person, the vibe and what you guys want. Are you both in the same place? The only way she can know is surely. And in most of the situations, there is a bit of a vibe. Like, you know, you, you get a reading from the other person on what they're looking for. Are they still going out and haven't mentioned anything are they still on dating apps you are 100 entitled to ask what we are and if you want to I encourage you to you just have to be prepared for whatever the answer is totally and I think that that's the good thing though right like even if it's an answer that you don't want at least then you know what you're in for and you can make a decision my reason for this is because like

you could spend a year seeing someone thinking that you're heading in the right direction and then them being turning around saying no we're just keeping it casual and keeping my options open until something better comes along you could go so far down a situation ship that you're entrenched in the situation ship and then you only have yourself to blame because you didn't have the chat at four weeks but i think it's also imperative that you do it in the right way there's a big difference with being like yo let's lock this shit down i want to marry you 4.4 kids white picket fence two dogs border collie sheep dog like there is a way you can do it be my boyfriend yeah or you can just say hey um can i just ask are you so we're on the same page are

you still seeing other people do you want to see other people i think it's just has to be in a really casual colloquial way because it'll start the convo he's going to ask you back then you're going to say well to be honest i haven't seen anyone i don't really want to i'm pretty invested to see where this goes boom that was a good line what i'm invested to see where this goes is play cool girl vibes well no just don't play psycho vibes I'm not very cool but I know how to not be a psycho I mean I did tell Matt after a month of dating whilst he was dating multiple other women that I loved him and wanted to be with him for the rest of my life so you know sometimes it works out that way as well I mean that's a whole different kettle of fish that's

a different world but okay good luck everyone that's in that situation I do not envy you we have some pretty big things we want to talk about in today's episode now I kind of we didn't really know where to start with this but the I guess the first thing let's start with the first thing it's always a good place to start it's good to start at the beginning we want to talk about Rebel Wilson Rebel Wilson being Britney's very good friend but also the fact that she made huge headlines over the weekend when she came out with her new relationship so we're going to unpack that we're also going to unpack some very interesting articles that came off the back of it and we have a lot of feelings about this but then we're also going to get into today's big topic which is around

toxic masculinity. And we got the opportunity to interview Will McMahon, who some of you guys might know from Will and Woody. Last week, Britt and I sat down with Will and we had a very vulnerable conversation where everybody cried. You may or may not have seen it. That's okay if you didn't. If you didn't see it, you can all jump on Instagram because both of us crying is on Instagram at the moment. It's a conversation around vulnerability, but more importantly, we talked with Will around toxic masculinity and his experience with depression. That is something that we're going to get into first Brit let's talk about Rebel Wilson yes and I want to make it very clear here before we jump into this some of you may know those of you that are new and

don't know Rebel is a really good friend of mine we've been friends for a while now I love her respect her she's an incredible woman and I don't want this to be a chat about Rebel I want this to be a chat about what has happened off the back of Rebel's relationship announcement really want to drive that home I feel like we'd be having this conversation regardless a few days ago on Friday which whenever you're listening to this that was the 10th of June Rebel came out and announced a beautiful new relationship she's very happy she's in love she put a photo of her and her new partner Ramona up on Instagram and she said I thought I was searching for a Disney prince maybe what I really needed all this time was a Disney princess hashtag love is love I actually get emotional

thinking about it because I just like we love love I love love and of course of course being good friends with rebel this is something I've you know I've gone along the journey with her and I've known you're crying yeah because I just think I just this made me really mad and upset and and I would have these feelings for anyone in this situation because it just must be really really tough and to see her post something just be like you know what here I am I'm so happy I'm in a stable healthy loving relationship makes me feel warm inside and I guess the thing is is that you personally have known that Rebel was in this relationship for a lot longer than just since Friday last week yeah yeah I mean yeah like I said um I was there when they not there

physically I've she's she's like she's filled me in on the details from the get-go so what has happened is and what has made us mad if nobody knows we're going to explain what happened she came out on Friday and everyone was so happy for her there was nothing negative written then the Sydney Morning Herald released an article that we want to talk to you about. And this is the main thing we want to talk about. Like, we're very, very stoked for Rebel. We love, love. But this is the thing that really made us fucking mad.

It was on the 11th of the 6th. So Rebel announced on the 10th. This article from the Sydney Morning Herald came out on the 11th. The heading is Rebel Starts Spreading News of Her Relationship Coming Out Rebel Style. Now, Laura, tell us a little bit about why this is so problematic. because I am so mad like I would be mad reading this about anyone but when it's a friend and someone you know as well there's a level of like respect and fierce protection for anyone in your life family or friends and I think when you see somebody be attacked on a private level let alone

a public level it just I'm just I'm so infuriated so I want you to explain it a little bit so I can just take a breather okay so the article that was written it's from a journalist named andrew hornery it was published in the sydney morning herald as brit said on the 11th and now what this article is essentially claiming is that the journalist andrew knew that rebel wilson was in a same-sex relationship they actually contacted rebel two days prior and had said we know that you were in a relationship with ramona a groomer we're giving you two days opportunity to give us a statement you know reply to this with your own comments because we're going to run a story and what Rebel actually did is instead of giving her comments to the Sydney Morning Herald who had

reached out to her PR team Rebel ended up going public with her relationship herself on Instagram as we saw with the beautiful post that she put up. Now this article that's been written by this journalist is all around the fact that he is butthurt basically that she took the opportunity she took the exclusive away from the Sydney Morning Herald, that they had done the research, that they had that scoop, and that instead of them being able to be the ones to release the news, she got in and did it first. Now, this is one of the quotes from the actual article.

It was an abundance of caution and respect that this media outlet emailed Rebel Wilson's representatives on Thursday morning, giving her two days to comment on her new relationship with a woman, LA Leisurewear designer Ramona Agrumah, before publishing a single word. Mr Hornery then argued that if he had outed the actress it shouldn't have been a big deal as sexual orientation is no longer something to be hidden even in Hollywood. The absolute irony of

this article and also social media other news reporters are up in arms about this but the irony is is that Andrew Hornery is saying that look you being in a same-sex relationship shouldn't be a big deal so why did you have to go ahead and take that exclusive away from us but we all know that we don't live in a perfect world. And in this world, for some reason, when somebody has identified as heterosexual for such a long time, and then they come out as a same sex or in a same sex relationship, that creates so much engagement that gets so many clicks. That is a huge fucking headline for some reason, but it is. And headlines and engagement are a currency. He is very aware that he had what was potentially one of the biggest scoops of his career had been taken off

him and this entire article is trying to claw back and say hey we knew about this first before she put out her own statement well he described it as a big mistake of giving rebel the the opportunity to comment for the two days that he did he said it was a big mistake and he said she chose to gazump the story now gazump well who even are you entry for starters i think zump the story and choosing to come out herself on social media, quote, her choice to ignore our discreet, genuine and honest queries was, in our view, underwhelming. Now, Andrew, I have a view myself.

You, sir, are underwhelming. In 2022, fancy getting mad at somebody for choosing to tell their own story about their relationship on their own social media and you have the audacity, sir, to write an angry article saying who do you think you are to have told your own story. Andrew Hornery, we are dedicating this episode to you. But also, can I just mention the word gazumped,

which I think we all had a giggle at when we first read it. I do also think that that attributes to just how archaic this journalist is, like who uses the word gazumped in the first place. There is such a warped perspective as to who owns a story and I think that's what Rebel has been robbed of. she took the opportunity to say, she was essentially forced to come out with her own sexuality. And we don't know where she sits in terms of like, obviously she's in this loving relationship, but was she at a point in her life where she felt comfortable to talk about her

sexuality? Was she at a point where she felt comfortable to share that? And she was essentially forced by a Sydney Morning Herald journalist who had a real gotcha moment to come out and share not only her relationship that she may not have been ready to share but also the fact that she is in a same-sex relationship and that regardless of whether we are in 2022 regardless of whether that is well received regardless of how the general perception towards her relationship it must be very hard to get to your own in your own personal identity to make that decision that you're ready to share that with the world and that's exactly right Laura it's not even this isn't I mean for me and hopefully for a lot of people they see this as this isn't even being

forced to come out but it's also being forced just to talk about a relationship in general even if it was a heterosexual relationship it's irrelevant somebody stuck a knife in and twisted it and what do you do with that information it's taken away from you and of course if you have two options one some publication is going to out you or two you can take control yourself and be you know the one that tells the world your news of course you're going to but that's exactly right it was you've got 48 hours or we're going to do this regardless and then to then have them be up in arms that you robbed them of that story when they were robbing you of something well they're robbing you of privacy privacy respect a lot of things so but it's unbelievable it's i actually

read the article multiple times because i didn't believe it i know at the end of the day rebel is secure and she is in a loving relationship and i know that she's very happy in that relationship but she did come out with her own response and her own tweet just saying you know it has been really hard and she's just trying to handle it with as much grace as she can while literally the whole world watches on this is what it is and she is can I say I can commend her but she is handling it with such grace and such humility to have been thrown into a situation that she might not have been ready to do well we did a bit of deep diving as well so Andrew Hornery who is the journalist of this publication, as we mentioned. Now, he has written many entertainment

news for the Sydney Morning Herald. And as much as he had written this, outing a same-sex relationship should be a redundant concept in 2022. Love is love, right? That is how he started off the entire article about Rebel Wilson. Now, in May 15 of 2022, he wrote an article which was titled, The Man Who Helped Thorpe Take His First Steps Out of the Closet. He also wrote an article in july 9 of 2021 which was i couldn't go on living a double life why conservative michael yabsley came out at 64 now this is a journalist who is very very aware of how a heterosexual person in this celebrity limelight who turns to being in a same-sex relationship or who identifies as being gay how that creates clicks he has written multiple articles on this so as

As much as he says in 2022, it shouldn't be about that. As much as he says it shouldn't be about it in 2022, he is acutely aware of how important this is as prime real estate entertainment news. And I think that is why people are so fucking pissed off because it was dressed up as, oh, why did you have to take this exclusive from us if it shouldn't matter that much? But at the end of the day, regardless of who someone is dating, their personal life should be able to be shared in whatever way they feel because it is their personal life, celebrity or not.

the entitlement from this man and this article is astounding and I think I think we've covered it all I think we the world now knows our opinion Laura I think I know where we stand on this but also social media in general like there were so many I mean if you have a google of this now there are so many people who are up in arms about it there are so many other journalists who have commented on this there are tweets about it and I think it's incredible to see that we are at a point in society where love truly is love Rebel Wilson's relationship has been embraced with such positivity and real compassion from the general population however it's really disappointing to see just the way that the media perpetuates stories and continues to think that this is

something that's scandalous that's worthy of a news article the other part of this is that we still are a society that is obsessed with labels whether we like it or not we love to say this person's heterosexual this person's now a lesbian this person is in a bisexual relationship everything has to have a label because we struggle with ambiguity. And I think when you bring this back to rebel as a person, and now like, I do not know rebel at all. I know obviously you do Brit, but it must be challenging spending 40 years of your life identifying as being a heterosexual and then going, okay, I have these feelings. I'm in this relationship now. I'm really happy, but what does that make me? And having a publication, trying to make assumptions as

the way that you identify and I think like there is so many layers to this that go beyond just someone being in a relationship because at the end of the day if Rebel Wilson had been in a relationship with a not so famous man this would not be headline news we just see a small byline in one of like the e-news articles which was like hey Rebel Wilson in relationship with like hot man the only reason why her relationship was so headline news last time was because it was with a billionaire and now it's headline news because it's with a woman 100% Laura that's entirely accurate everyone has their own journey in love and life and relationships and of course rebels obviously had to figure things out along the way I'm not going to comment on that because that's

not my place to comment on what she's been through in her discovery and things like that but I can comment on things that rebel has commented on herself which is the fact that she has been looking for a love for a long time and she's finally found it now and that's what the world should be celebrating that she is fucking happy and secure. I wish that wasn't taken away from her and I wish I wasn't forced upon her. But the other thing I wanted to add is we are in no way saying Andrew Hornary, the columnist, the guy that wrote this, the journalist, we are not saying that he's against her relationship and against gay relationships. That's not it because I do think he is in support. Our problem comes with A, the fact that this was forced upon Rebel and B, the

way in which he chose to write about it this is where the problem comes from and even just in the article herself it is steeped in subconscious negativity and I think this is something that a lot of people might not realize when they're consuming media I just want to read you one example of what I'm trying to say in this article where that he he's talking about her new relationship he says things like rebel also used this same platform instagram to brag about her past relationship with her billionaire boyfriend okay the word brag rebel didn't use instagram to brag about anything rebel used instagram to do what people do as opposed to photo of their life she posted a photo of her boyfriend and all of a sudden she's bragging about it it's really interesting

i mean this is a tactic that we see across so much media how journalists will use really negative undercurrents in their wording, which give you an impression of someone without even realizing it. If you read that article and you're like, this person was posting photos where they were bragging about their relationship, it instantly incites in you that they are superficial or that they're entitled or they're somebody that you wouldn't like. Whereas if they were to just write on the platform where they posted a photo of their boyfriend, which every single person does, you would have a very different impression. But because of the tone and the way that an article can be written we are subconsciously conditioned to like someone or to dislike someone and we see

it a lot in the way that women are framed within media in general totally and the word the word gloated is in here as well her friend who set them up Hugh Sheridan he had spoken about setting them up and all of a sudden he's gloating about it so where rebels gazumping it she's bragging her friends are gloating this is all in this one tiny article so with when you're consuming this media and this is everyone reading it when you're consuming it all subconsciously all these words are like hounding into the back of your head and you're like and you walk away from that in a different way if you read that article saying spreads the love about this new relationship so it's something to be conscious of as well when everyone is consuming media any I could

talk about this for a long time but I think that's enough of that chat uh congratulations to Rebel we love that she's happy and in love we love to see it so I think that's I think that's all we need to say on the topic and we'll put down our pitchforks to Andrew Hornery put down yeah put lay them down everybody everyone go live your best life all righty i am jumping on here very quickly because there is some more information to the story things have happened since we finished recording now brit and i we recorded this discussion about rebel wilson about the article and about andrew hornery and her being forced into coming out about her relationship potentially before she was ready to because of this 48 hour deadline that was put on her by the gossip

columnist. Now, Andrew Hornary has just come out with an apology and that came out at one o'clock today. We think it would be remiss of us to put out this podcast episode without at least acknowledging this apology. Now, the apology was also published in the Sydney Morning Herald and it was titled, I made mistakes over Rebel Wilson and we'll learn from them. In the apology, Hornary attempts to explain why he wrote the article that he wrote. He attempts to explain why he originally gave Rebel Wilson a 48-hour deadline to comment on her relationship, but he also says this, I genuinely regret that Rebel has found this hard. That was never my intention, but I see she has handled it with extraordinary grace. As a gay man, I'm well aware of how deeply discrimination hurts.

The last thing I would ever want to do is inflict that pain on someone else. Now, I really think it's important, just because Andrew Hornary is part of the queer community doesn't mean that that gives him or anybody the right to make somebody else feel forced to talk about their sexuality before they're ready to themselves it's not a get out of jail free card he also goes on to say in this apology that the tone of his column on Saturday was also off I got it wrong I allowed my disappointment to cast a shadow over the piece that was not fair and for that I apologize now we'll put a link to this article in the show notes as an apology unfortunately we can't put the original article in the show notes as the Sydney Morning Herald is now removing

it and replacing it with the apology article. However, if you guys do a Google, there are loads of articles surrounding this. But what I wanted to say on this, and before we move on to the next part of this whole episode, is that I think it's such an important thing. It is Pride Month. It is so amazing to see so many other publications, so many other journalists, so many other entertainment journalists gossip journalists commenting on this story and really holding this type of behavior accountable because it's 2022 nobody should ever be forced to talk about their sexuality before they're ready to and it truly doesn't matter how famous someone is how many instagram followers someone has or how interested we are in someone's personal life it's nobody's business what their

sexual orientation is and nobody should be fearful or have to come out because they're scared that their story is going to be told by the press or by the media before they're comfortable well it is time for us to get into our favorite part of every single episode and that is accidentally unfiltered slash confessionals slash potentially whatever's funny whatever is coming into our lives uh i have an accidentally unfiltered for today or do you want to you were pissing yourself on the couch earlier i know but i always think that's really funny and then you it doesn't land as well with you. Okay. I am going to go first. Mine's very innocent. It's got nothing to do with poop, nothing to do with sex. And I'm here for it. I probably won't enjoy

it then. Okay. My partner accidentally broke one of my favorite bowls the other day. No hard feelings. It was an accident. Still annoying. Yes, but it was one of my favorites. I finally got around to going out, getting some super glue and gluing it back together because I just wasn't ready to let it go. I left the bowl on the benchtop to let it set and dry. This morning I was tidying the kitchen and I went to put the bowl away. It wouldn't move. The super glue seems to have seeped out of the cracks in the bowl and now the bowl is super glued to the kitchen. That's so fucking annoying. I don't know what to do so I've just left it there. My partner hasn't noticed yet because he never cleans shit up. It's been two days. It's only a matter of time until he goes

to move it or put it away, he realised that the bowl is now a part of the kitchen bench. It's a good thing that it's your favourite and it's going to be there forever now on prime posse right there on the kitchen bench. Imagine that moment that you've got to put it away, that moment of realisation where you're like, oh, fuck. He's just stuck in the middle of the bench.

You also can't take it off because it's going to damage the bench. I reckon you just get yourself a kitchen stool, park it right there and that's where you eat breakfast from now on. Cereal every day in the same spot. Okay, that was very G-rated. It was, but I love a G-rated one. mine is less g oh actually no it's it's g-rated it's this is very g-rated there's no plus there's no sex at all there's no sex no scandal all right i'm on a day trip with my boyfriend and we were

in a cute homeware store down the coast i was standing there looking at some knickknacks and i felt my boyfriend walk over and stand next to me i was just telling him how much i needed to go to the bathroom so not only did i tell him how much i needed to go to the bathroom i grabbed his arm and I gave him a cuddle and then I whispered into his ear I really need to pee the shock I got when a random man turned around and said oh do you and his girlfriend was standing on the other side of him I quickly grabbed my actual boyfriend and hurried out of the store whilst almost pissing myself with laughter and because you needed to physically go to the toilet bless I think that's great I'm here for this I love the innocent accidentally I need to pee well it's better

then I've got diarrhea I'm about to shit myself imagine if she said that that was really graphic when was the last time you grabbed a love interest and said I've got diarrhea and I need to shit myself last time you had diarrhea well I haven't had a love interest in a while so that answer's negligible the diarrhea actually was more recent please stop all right well on that note let's get in to toxic masculinity so today we are talking about toxic masculinity slash mental health slash the fact that last week Laura and myself and Will and Woody had a lunch we all cried we all had a breakdown we all talked about our deepest darkest feelings did we have a breakdown or did we have a breakthrough both yes one preceded the other now this was we did something that was actually was

really quite special so Will and Woody if you guys don't know who they are they are a radio duo on Kiss FM very very popular radio duo yeah and they're two men who have opened up a space to talk about mental health. They are also both on Celebrity Apprentice at the moment. So they're getting a lot of air time. But I guess the thing that's so unique about them is that traditionally radio, you don't really think about men talking about their feelings. It's not really the space for it. It's the space for like shock jocks. It's the space for inappropriate sexual fucking innuendos. It's not really the space for two men to cry. Now, this thing that Britt and I did, this share my food concept, it's something that you guys can roll out in your own home if you

want to do it it's all about sitting down with the people that you're closest with the people that you love and having a conversation that goes beyond just the hey how you going it's asking questions that kind of really taps into the more vulnerable conversations and let me tell you if brit and i can end up both in tears with cameras on us whilst recording what was essentially a podcast you guys will be fine with opening up and crying in front of your closest nearest and dearest it was literally the bachelor all over again it was it was food feelings crying questions it was I was like the cameras in our face I was like this is the bachelor again no but it was a really beautiful lunch we were relative strangers having these conversations and one of the topics that we

got onto when we were doing this lunch was toxic masculinity and I know that this is not a new concept so many of you probably already know what toxic masculinity is but this month is actually men's mental health awareness month and so we thought what better time to then have a conversation around toxic masculinity with someone who has been incredibly open and vulnerable about their experiences with depression and mental health and how toxic masculinity has affected them. So this interview that we're going to do today is with Will McMahon and he talks about his own experience. But to also give you guys a bit more of an explanation around what toxic masculinity is, in case you're not aware, it comes down to these real gender stereotypes. This sort of like

idea that boys will be boys, men are manly and masculine and don't have feelings and shouldn't talk about their feelings. Men don't cry. And men don't cry because it is weak and pathetic and emasculating to have feelings. Now we all know that that is absolutely not the case, that men have many feelings. They just haven't been given the same ability to talk about them as what women have. And now we have podcasts. We sit down with our girlfriends and talk about our relationships. We talk about love. We talk about the way that we feel in a really open way because traditionally feminine and women in society, we're expected to be more in touch with our feelings and to be able to speak about our feelings openly. This doesn't subscribe to what is and what defines stereotypical

masculinity. Now, this is like a really top level definition of it. And there are so many ways around how toxic masculinity impacts everyone. It doesn't just impact men. It impacts the LGBTQI community. It impacts women. It impacts literally every single person. And this is a really great quote that i think perfectly sums up what toxic masculinity is it's written by a journalist named jessica keith and she says toxic masculinity is what you get when a bottle of unpasteurized full fat maleness is left out on the counter to curdle it's what happens when traditional ideas of what it means to be a man strong violent powerful too tough to be bothered with pesky emotions are prioritized over pretty much everything else it embraces violence and

aggression as natural male traits and smugly excuses these behaviors when they harm others it's the whole boys will be boys mentality toxic masculinity is so dominant in our culture that anyone who doesn't identify as a windmill high-fiving alpha male is bound to suffer it's super important to note exactly what you just said laura that toxic masculinity does affect everybody this isn't a one-size-fits-all and there is a bit of a crossover with stuff that we have spoken about on the podcast before things like weaponized incompetence rape culture gaslighting and we've we've covered these in episodes we've done surrounding domestic violence and coercive control so we really do want to note that this is something that we realize affects everybody and

today we are covering it from a male perspective but just so just as an example like a very generalized example of what toxic masculinity is it's like when you're back in the schoolyard as a teenager think back to your school years and I know this is a word I don't even use anymore and i would never an insult but when i was a teenager the the word that everyone would use the slang that everyone would use was when a guy had any kind of feeling or emotion or got upset about anything it was don't be a fucking pussy that was the word every other boy used to say to them don't be a fucking pussy and back and like you would just never ever say this now i'm going back i don't want to tell you my age but i'm going back 15 20 years yeah but like it's pretty i'm

pretty old but we wouldn't use pussy to describe a woman would you you wouldn't say stop being a pussy to a to a girl who's crying about something and that's why I think like obviously this they're literally saying they're relating them to a woman's vagina like that's what it is it's saying you are so soft you're like a woman's vagina like when you think about the comment it's so ridiculous like what a stupid statement but it had meaning to it which was you're acting like a woman the meaning behind you are being a fucking pussy is you are acting like a woman because only women would have feelings and cry. Totally. And I guess the other thing that this ties back into is when we actually sat down with Will and Woody and had these conversations over our share my food,

another word that Woody used, which I was like, fuck, that is such a word that men would use to describe themselves negatively, but it's not really a word that I think that we would associate with women. So we had to do this experiment where basically like we had to use a word to describe how we think other people see us. And Britt and I both chose like quite effeminate words that described us. And Woody said he thinks that other people see him as a coward or cowardly. And I was like, wow, that is such a strong word to describe the way that you think people perceive you outside of yourself. But also I think like cowardly is such a word that we attribute to men, like that they haven't sort of shaped up to be a manly enough man that that's what makes them cowardly

it's such a gendered word as well I guess this idea with toxic masculinity is that it really pigeonholes a very specific type of man and that if you fall outside of that then you're not a manly man and so therefore or you're not a man at all like it's it all comes down to like how we view masculinity within society and anything that deviates from that is not leveling up and just on that before we wrap this up it's funny that Woody used the word coward to describe himself because there's this huge misconception and I did say this to Woody actually I said it to both of them it's this huge misconception that men think that if you cry it's a turn-off for a woman if you have emotions and you speak about them and you feel things it's a turn-off and women don't want that

but the funny thing is and I mean I can only speak for myself and a few friends I've spoken to this about. Generally, women want men to have feelings. It's a turn on for me when a man can be open about how he feels and can be upset about something that's important to him or that's worrying him. For me, that's not a turn off. It's showing me that we can connect on a different level and you're comfortable enough and open enough to sit in those feelings. So maybe by having these conversations and any men that are listening know that they can have these feelings and it's not putting women off like they think it might be. Well, I think that there's been a huge changing tied in terms of toxic masculinity. Like we said, this is not a new concept. It is something that's

been discussed widely. And I do think that there are a lot more atypical manly men, i.e. Jason who is a big man mountain, but who will talk about their feelings. I think that this is changing from the top down, but I think at the same time, it's people like Will McMahon who are being really open about their stories, being really open, talking about depression that are leading the way and that it's the visibility that helps to de-stigmatize these conversations. So with that all said, let's get into the chat with Will. Will, thank you for coming today and welcome to Life Uncut. Thank you so much. Thanks, Britt. Pleasure to be here. Thank you so much, Laura. Now, we never start an episode without doing it the exact same way that we do it every week,

and that is we want to know what is your most embarrassing story? So I had a bit of a think about this. Obviously, I tell silly, embarrassing stories about myself all the time. So I really didn't want to regurgitate something, but I had something pretty embarrassing slash very embarrassing that happened to me the other day. My, as you know, I just had a little baby girl. Congratulations. Thank you very much. I promise this is not some lame parent story. I'm trying to avoid them for as long as I possibly can and posting about my kids, but I'm finding that very hard. So this is before the baby arrived. Actually, we were trying to induce labor. I'm sure you guys would know that one of the great ways to induce labor is

by having sex so something i think well i don't know maybe i'm making an assumption here but i hope well not not that i hope maybe have either of you had sex with a pregnant woman before i mean i've been the pregnant woman that matt has had sex with so i know it from the other side no i'm not doubting that you've got the other perspective in this i haven't been pregnant when was the last time you had sex with a pregnant woman last full moon so so yeah we're trying to bring on labor and so yeah we occasionally start having sex but it's a really like it's just a lot going on like logistically it's a bit harder and also things just aren't quite the same when you're at nine months pregnant why logistically don't you just roll them on the side well yeah but

there's still a big belly there and like a little human that kicks and and there's like a little alien inside yeah so if the baby's moving like that's just rattling because you're obviously just thinking like are you knocking on the door are you not knocking on the door and then there's just like the nipples are like the size of sauce but sauces like it's just a real it's just a hard thing to navigate anyway while i'm navigating all of this my girlfriend's mom who's staying with us at the time uh she's staying with us at the moment while we're sort of like having the baby etc she walked in while this was going on while you were knocking on the door she knocked on the door or she didn't knock on the door while i was knocking exactly it was just like this moment

where and i don't know like i'm have you i'm sure you guys have been walked in by your parents before like or if you haven't there's this thing that i'm sure everybody listening right now can empathize with where they don't fucking leave they linger they do this thing where they just stand and like take it in and then kind of like just try and smooth it over with like previously i've been walked in with my dad and he's like oh i'm just wondering what you'd want for dinner and i'm like just fuck off and she she reliably did exactly the same thing she stood there and she just like stood there and she was just like looking at it and like i and i like it's not my mom's anyway sam eventually just like yells at her she's like mom get out and she's like okay sorry sorry

sorry and she like busts away and she's really sweet was it very obvious will like we under the blankets and you could have just like stayed really still and pretend it didn't happen or was very obvious and out in the open what you were doing oh god i don't know how graphic we can get here but oh we can get graphic but i'm getting the feeling it was pretty obvious like he wasn't in there trying to find the head but like we know it was graphic yeah yeah yeah it was like well yeah she was on all fours and like it's probably like we're just trying out the birthing positions mom i swear yeah yeah that's right that's right that's right wow that's your mother-in-law i had did that go down okay oh yeah we just laughed about she just thought it was hilarious like it

was just a very funny thing that is such a wow an awkward situation will you are currently on celebrity apprentice and you're advocating for gotcha for life which is a mental fitness foundation that speaks about toxic masculinity and how it can lead to mental health issues now who do you think toxic masculinity affects and how have you experienced it in your own life okay so i want to start by saying i'm actually really fucking scared to talk about this so thank you appreciate it but you know it's funny like ironically that is the issue with it isn't it that i was scared to come on here and talk about that that is inherent in why we have such a problem with toxic masculinity because it's almost just like this word that guys hate to be branded with guys hate to talk about

and it's just terrifying to even think that i could be labeled with it or i'm going to say something wrong about it so i really want to stress before we go into it that there are obviously two sides to this whole concept of toxic masculinity and that is how women perceive it and how they're affected by it which i just don't want to talk on at all because i'm not a chick and i've got no fucking idea and i don't want to try and pretend like anything that men go through can compensate for a lot of the really truly terrible things that men can do to women as a result of toxic masculinity but i can talk about it from yeah the perspective of a guy who got very depressed because of toxic masculinity. And basically I don't think it was the reason that

I got depressed, but I think it's a hundred percent exacerbated it. And I think it's the reason that a lot of guys struggle with being who they are really. I can only tell you where I've experienced it in my life and at what point I think it gets damaging for men. And I think that's an important point to make is that like, when you think of the word toxic, toxic implies that something's poisonous right i think that when we think about toxic masculinity we think about people wielding masculinity you know like it's something that they're using to hurt other people whereas it's poisonous so it's also damaging to the people who are wielding it and that's what i think there's this duality with it which is really interesting and if we approach

it as this thing which is like don't get me wrong needs to be squashed and shut down and eliminated as much as we can so it doesn't hurt others we need to approach it I think for a long-term goal through where it comes from in order to stop it harming people who are the ones who are wielding it and I think that's the really really tough part about it because the guys who are using it the guys who are victims of it will never want to admit that that's something that they are using I wanted to give you an example of like toxic masculinity in my life so I went to an elite private boy school and this is something that I haven't really spoken about on podcasts I spoke about it on the imperfects a while ago but Hugh and I decided to delete it and it's

hilarious that we decided to delete it because we didn't want backlash but I went to an elite private boy school and that's a place where like you get taught to be a goal setter you get taught how to achieve you get taught ambition you get taught that's you walk into the the hall there and like the honor boards are just filled with names of boys who are like cricket captain, footy captain. And I was like a drama nerd and I was just a full on nerd. Like I love, I love music and poetry. And these are things that I could only admit well after I've left school because I used to go to school and I wanted to be a part of it because that was the only thing that I knew how, that's the only lesson that I knew. And I remember being on trams leaving school

where we used to do like gangbang chants about girls on the tram, like echoing each other's voices down trams to the point where like naturally school girls would get off. And I look back on that and it's just like, who the fuck was I? What am I a part of? How did I get here? And the truth is that I wasn't taught. Young boys in those situations grow up to be often colossal dicks because they're not taught any other way with how to deal with society, with how to deal with life. They're grown up around boys and you don't talk about your feelings. You don't talk about what you're weak at. You don't talk about what you've learned. You don't talk about how to be, you know, how to be nice to women it's this dick swinging competition and that's the only thing you know

it almost makes me sad in a lot of ways when i look at a lot of these boys and i and i look at a lot of my friends and and like a lot of people who get slammed for being toxically masculine and you know i can people can rake me over the coals for this but i have a degree of sympathy for people who get caught in the web of this machine because unless you're ripped out of it by something like like me I was ripped out of it by depression it's a pretty hard circuit to break I think that as well in that this idea that softness or feelings or being vulnerable somehow we've tied that concept up with weakness somehow it's become that they coexist together and like even just crying or showing like your feelings or not being this constant like achiever

resilient, the foundation for a family, like the man of the house, these sort of ideas that we've created, anything less than that, this softness is tied into an idea of failure. A hundred percent. One of the greatest lessons that I've learned through everything I've been through, the strongest people are the ones who figure out that your strength is through your softness. And that is a beautiful trait to cultivate. And it ties into something I've told you i had a baby recently something i found really fascinating while we were having learning all about pregnancy is that oxytocin brings on contractions in pregnancy oxytocin is the love chemical makes you feel really good about yourself like when you hug someone or when you fall in love

and oxytocin can't be released in the face of adrenaline so like often women will stop having contractions as soon as they get to hospital or like when something startles them or all these things because their oxytocin just goes not that's adrenaline i'm out it's exactly the same thing with this this idea of toxic masculinity is it like boys don't get a chance to access their oxytocin they don't get a chance to release oxytocin so of course adrenaline is going to rule the roost and that's the only thing that they know well you've been really open publicly about your battle with depression how did you go about living your everyday life whilst you were struggling and not feeling as though you could talk about it because that must have been

so hard a lot of people say to me i can't believe you do what you do or you did radio while you were depressed like that's a common thing because when you are depressed the last thing you want to do is do a comedy show with your friend so i actually count myself as really really lucky just incredibly fortunate that i was totally broken but i had to go to work to do a fucking comedy show like i was lucky because most men who get depressed most men who come up against something like this go to work and they hide behind a piece of machinery or a photocopier or a computer and they have the opportunity to continue to bury this stuff whereas I had to go to work given that I was young and dumb I was spending all my money on drugs and alcohol on

the weekend when I was living in Perth I didn't have any money so I had to go to work so I was like this catch-22 where like all the booze and the drugs was just driving me under but I had to keep working to afford it a vicious cycle indeed it was a shocking setup it was a death spiral so i had to go to work and then i get to work and it like beautifully i did the show with my best friend and he was just like mate he didn't even need to say to me this is just not tenable we can't continue on like this so i was kind of forced to go to a psych my old content director todd campbell who was a beautiful man and i know he had his own demons as well he walked me down to the GP and he was like, mate, we're just going to get you looked at. Hilariously, I went into a

GP. She gave me a box of antidepressants and said, this will sort you out. And then I got kicked out, which was really funny in hindsight. Isn't that ridiculous? Extraordinary. But then we worked through it and I started learning about all this, these ideas of masculinity and like how I felt like I needed to be someone that I wasn't. And I feel like we all kind of feel that with our genders, right? That's why there's such this, it's so cool these days we talk about gender fluidity because everyone with their gender you feel like a bit of a square peg in a round hole like you're a woman but like there's still this image floating around somewhere in your subconsciousness about what the archetype of woman is and you're still not quite there

matt and i have had these conversations but not just in terms of like gender identity roles but in terms of parenting roles like i have a village of other mothers around me who talk about what it is to have an identity of being a mother what it means to go through losing my identity and refinding my identity and and this huge transformative time which has been the last couple of years and then I've spoken to Matt about the things that he struggled with and he doesn't have that community dads don't get together and talk about how they feel about being a dad how their lives have changed he's like not even just that side of things but like we don't get together and talk about sleep routines like that's what mums do and I think these type of gender roles

not only does it play into this idea of toxic masculinity, but it ties into everything around how we structure society and how we structure our roles in the home and what flow and effect that has. A hundred percent. As I said before, I'm really lucky. I'm really lucky that I had to address this stuff and I'm lucky that I can talk about it with you. And people always find that so refreshing. I find it hilarious that I like people find this so refreshing that I talk about this stuff candidly because this is now just second nature to me but it would take a lot of my friends drinks and drinks and drinks and drinks and drinks to pull me aside and be like yo bro you know that like depression stuff you've been talking about recently like you know and we you know we might

get there we might move past you know what multi we've got on tonight and like i don't know whatever that's a couple of like classic blokey topics but they get thrown around that's fine that's banter that's blokey banter but what men need to develop is the capacity as gus wallen says to go beyond the banter to move your friendship from an acquaintance to a friend and if we can tie that back into toxic masculinity the funny thing about dudes who because like it's not like these guys don't have emotions they're fucking people right but the only emotion that toxic masculinity lets you have is anger so a lot of the men that you meet who are the biggest dicks on the planet who are just angry all the time are really fucking upset and it's them projecting that

and this is the worst part about toxic masculinity is the victims of it yes he's a victim but it's the other people around him who experience the anger who experience that as he projects on them all of his problems because he's never allowed himself to actually look at them because society tells him that he can't look at them because he's not a man if he does. I think it so hugely ties into like this concept of vulnerability. And I know the word gets thrown around a lot. Vulnerability is so important to forming connections and relationships, right? It's like that factor that allows you to really understand who that person is. That vulnerability is almost like looking inside or having that keyhole to look through and go, oh, that is who you are. And I

think with that comes a greater level of understanding when was it or what shifted for you apart from understanding or finding out that you were depressed through going through like you know the formal medical channels what was it that changed for you in terms of being able to talk about your feelings ultimately and I'll throw this back in with Woody and like what we had to do we had to keep working together we you know that was our job and we liked our job there was no getting around the fact that I was like really upset a lot and I was really really glum and I was like really glum I had to try and explain to him what was going on I had to try and explain to him why I was so upset I was so depressed one day I couldn't get off my bed

and Woody came around to my house I was just in tears I couldn't move I don't know if you've been like this sometimes you can get so depressed you can't move thankfully I haven't been there for a long time but i was just on my bed like and the idea of walking to the fridge was like walking to china it was just like everything was just heavy and yuck and woody came around and he was like he was trying to understand what was going on bless him he came over and he was like bro i get it you know like this one day i had a pimple on my ass and it was so fucking painful that like i was pretty sure that I wasn't going to be able to sit down on a chair at school so like I just stayed in bed for the whole day I was like crying with laughter but it was like this olive branch from

someone who just didn't know what was going on and it made me realize that he also didn't have the gears to understand what was going on here and this is the reason that I think that we have an issue we have a mental health crisis is that i realized i was the one who was going to have to first show the vulnerability which was going to get him to open up to so that our relationship could move beyond pimples on asses and girls and football and all of this stuff and as two guys who went to a private school who that was our language it was fucking terrifying I was like shit how do I do this but then I just started spilling I started spilling about how insecure I felt how invalid I felt how awful I felt how I thought I was never good enough and like all of these things

from that moment on and I'd stress this to all guys who were scared about having this sort of a chat with their friends our relationship just exploded like it just blossomed and blossomed and blossomed as you just got layers and layers and layers and layers and it's what you're talking about i like to think of vulnerability as like a dissolving sort of an ointment if you like it kind of just like works its way it like just steadily unsheathes the layers which are protecting all the good stuff because it feels like initially it's like oh this is the stuff that i would never to share with anyone but you can only gain from sharing things that feel insecure to you to others because that gives them a chance to be insecure too like if you roll around the world putting

people in this position where they feel like you're perfect they instantly go into this mode where they're like okay well well they've got it sorted out so i'm not going to come out here and show them that i haven't got it sorted out because then you know that'd be terrifying so as soon as you show anyone that you are fucked up insecure vulnerable terrified it transforms every relationship on the planet i often do it with like big guests that we have on the show i'll just be like they'll be like how you going i'll be like oh you know it might be something stupid like i stink like shit today or like just something fun or small or just like a little bit and it's just a little cookie like a little vulnerability cookie and they're just like oh cool i can let my guard down

how nice so that day on that on my bed that day was probably the first day that i remember really trying to tell someone what it felt like i love that he compared you to a pimple on his ass in the most crucial moment in your relationship history oh isn't it amazing for all the women we have obviously a very large female-based audience for all the women that are listening right now that have someone in their life, a brother, a father, an uncle, a friend, someone in their life that they think could be struggling. They're not sure. Maybe it's like you in the early days. Maybe they don't know yet, but something doesn't seem right. Maybe they do know something's wrong completely. What is your advice on how they should approach the situation coming from someone that's

been there? So the first thing I'd say is, you know, that Celebrity Apprentice episode where I ran a retreat on your inner child and I was hanging out with all these guys who were super macho dudes darren mcmullen vince colossimo benji marshall like people that i actually really looked up to and who were super macho men and for the first two episodes of the season woody and i were having a shit one because they were just big alpha males and you know i just told you all about this little soft cocoon that we'd created for each other and we're very very very vulnerable and like we were kind of keeping up and this sort of stuff but benji asked us to do this retreat episode and i did this this meditation on your inner child and it was the first time any one of

us had been vulnerable or kind just outwardly kind to each other and they burst into tears like they cut so much of that footage like i had to hold darren for minutes it was full on and it was it was proof of the power of being compassionate with people like that and i just you said you got lots of female listeners i just don't expect them nor am i telling them to go and be nice to someone who's a fucking asshole to you because i don't know the level of hurt they've caused you and i don't know how much of a dick they really are and maybe that's you don't need to is the other thing i'd say that's not your role but if it's someone that you love the expression kill them with kindness comes to mind getting through this vortex of masculinity if you can

be kind to that person if you can show them compassion in the face of all their dickness you will find the results are extraordinary and it kind of comes back to what i was talking about before about this idea of masculinity being poisonous and it hurting them too and if i can use another analogy do you guys know who eddie betts is okay he's an afl footballer he's like one of the best indigenous players of all time and he was at this game and he got a racial slur from a little girl in the crowd naturally he pointed her out and they went to go and evict her from the ground and eddie found out afterwards that they evicted her and like you know cut her membership up or whatever they did with her and he was like what are you guys doing you want to

expel this girl cut her membership up torture like what do you think that's going to do to her with racism she's just going to think i'm a fucking dickhead and she's going to be an even worse racist than she ever was so he was like can we bring her in here so they brought her in he sat down with her. He spoke with her, explained to her how and why it hurt him. I'm not in a minority group. I'm a white heterosexual guy. So for me to talk about anyone in a minority or in a position of feeling undermined by another majority group, let's say, is very high-handed. And I really don't want to do that. But I look at that and I go, holy shit, that is the way to treat people who are wielding this level of if you can find the gear toxic masculinity or just masculinity in general

or anger if if you feel like they're expressing that and i promise you the layers are there like they're there but it's just how to wade through them if it's someone that you love and they're depressed two okay rule is my rule first okay are you okay every guy on the planet's gonna go yeah mate what's for dinner are you okay wait for the classic yeah I'm fine what's for dinner and then go no no are you okay and then you stand a chance of getting somewhere you're so right in saying that whenever you do ask somebody how are they it's just our default response to say yeah I'm fine like nobody wants to admit or come out straight away that they're actually having problems or that they're struggling with something what do you think needs to be done in order to

help fix these issues that surround toxic masculinity and do you think it's something that needs to happen on an individual level or something that we need to look at from a much broader scale we talk about reactionary change and then there's like cultural change like actually from the ground up is the only way that this is going to slowly happen and it really comes back to all of the stuff that we've been talking about about teaching boys that you're not in a race with blinkers on and you don't have to reach a finish line before everybody else. In fact, given that you've got the blinkers on, you're not seeing the fucking world. You're not enjoying it. Happiness isn't only achieved through success. You don't have to be the best.

And the quicker you can learn that being vulnerable and being insecure makes you more accessible to others that means that you will have a richer far more fulfilling life where you're not this island where the only way you can communicate is through competing if i could go up to myself as a teenager and encourage me to explore all the softer sides of myself and to be okay with that i would probably have saved myself a lot of hurt so i think that's i think that's really the key is trying to educate young boys by showing them. And that's what I'm trying to do as much as I can. I think that a big part of that is,

and this is why it's a little bit disappointing to hear you say so much of this was left on the cutting room floor on Celebrity Apprentice, because I think a big part of this is televising this. You guys had a moment where a lot of, in your words, big, macho, masculine men broke down and were very, very upset and vulnerable. and there was a beautiful moment there that we know happened now thanks to you then we also know

it was cut that would have done wonders for so many young men boys teenagers to see that to see that they're idols oh shit like they they cry too they get upset too they're talking about their feelings i think that that that makes me a bit upset that that happened but again it's just people like you going out and fighting the good fight now and being very vulnerable and open and talking and sharing your story and we can't thank you enough for coming on today to share your side and the things that you've been through and the work that you are doing to try and change the next generation.

So big shout out to you, Will. Thanks, Britt. I appreciate it. Tell everyone where they can find you besides the radio, but don't listen to them. Listen to Life Uncut. Don't listen to Will and Woody.

Listen to Life. I try and keep a pretty low profile online. Like I'm very much just Will and Woody socials is probably a good place to follow me if you're interested in following me. I did a podcast called Share My Mood. recently which ended up in the share my mood app which we made last year which was all about creating an app where people could talk without having to physically have conversations because

guys have confined conversations so hard so we made an app where you can share how you're feeling in like three clicks on your phone so if you want to learn how that worked share my mood is the podcast as well where i kind of like really go into this stuff and try and explore why it's such issue and more importantly um how we can change it so yeah well thank you so much for jumping on and being a part of the pod and for exactly what brit said for giving the topic visibility because i think that that like above everything is one of the most important parts of this conversation is just acknowledging that it's a very real topic but also that the more that we talk about it the more that we de-stigmatize it and the more that you know the next generation of boys or this

generation of men who are feeling exactly the same way it opens up that conversations in people's households and it also arms women with a bit more information around how to have these conversations with the men in their lives i hope so guys thanks so much for having me kill them with kindness kill them with kindness it is time for our favorite part actually i shouldn't say that because i always say accidentally unfiltered is our favorite part then i say suck and sweet is our favorite part too many favorites we never finish an episode without our suck and our sweet our highlight and our low light of each and every single week it's a nice thing for you guys to do at home too with your family and your friends actually funnily enough will and woody played

this game but they called it something different and i was like guys we already trademarked it yeah it's our suck and sweet all right what is your suck for the week my suck is last night delilah projectile vomited all over the floor that's disgusting in rank and it was medication so it means i have to re-medicate her again because it means that she didn't she didn't keep it down so I love that for me it was really chunky too it was if I really need to explain it for you but good I love to talk about the consistency of a dog vomit it wasn't remember the last time she vomited Laura we spoke about in the podcast it looked like no I can't describe it and it was in it was in like my new deep rug this was thank the lord this was on the floorboard so

it was absolutely fine I can't overstate this the last time I was here when Britt's dog did a vomit she vomited into high pile into like three centimeter high pile rug and I had to pick it out with my hands well hang on you make that sound like i made you pick i didn't make you get on your hands and knees and clean up her vomit i wasn't gonna i wasn't gonna sit here in the room and just let you do it clean up around my feet was i we laura very much she did get on her hands and knees she did assist me in the vomit cleanup and anyway that was gross my sweet for the week is delilah and i experienced the most insane sunset last night i saw your instagram post which was like me on my romantic walk with my dog hashtag love is love it was so funny though everyone was

the sunset over bondi last night was you know how sometimes it just turns it on it was incredible there were dolphins there were whales the sun was the whole sky was orange was beautiful at the top of this headland i reckon i was the only person there on my own it was all these couples taking these photo shoots of each other and then there was delilah and i and i someone was walking past and i was like you might take a photo of me and my dog they didn't do a very good job but everyone was doing these couple photos and delilah and i were there like spooning into the sunset it was beautiful but how annoying is it when you ask a stranger to take a photo of you and then they take only one or two photos and they're shit i said take the photo take multiple photos until you

get the photo i never asked i wouldn't i was too awkward but i was taking a selfie and someone just walked past and they're like do you want me to take one if we can i was like oh okay if that's not if it's not too much trouble it's our anniversary you know i didn't say that anyway my suite was the just a really beautiful sunset yeah that was it something something so easy normal and nice this week but it was a very special moment i love that thanks that's beautiful what's your suck my suck is that i think marley might have worms oh yeah laura gets in the car today she's like so you guys might need to all take worming tablets no do you know what she doesn't have worms she's just constipated and that's really annoying as well i don't know

what's worse i'd probably rather the worm i don't know well at least worm is just one tablet and you're done constipated kids yeah constipated kids you gotta like all day my tummy hurts my bum hurts and you're like well just have some prune juice darling hey i might have to pull that poop out how do you do that oh you haven't ever had you can yeah sometimes you have to pull I am not doing that. I did not sign up for that level of parenting. We will go to the GP if it comes to that. She's been a bit sick. So that's my, that's my suck. My sweet for the week is I had a really nice weekend. I actually did some really lovely things. I went to a kid's concert. I did see the dedication to the concert. Dive City. I am your number one groupie.

Do you know that they've been your sweet probably three times? Yes. I'm like a fucking obsessed with them. Okay. It's Matt O'Kine. And I think he thinks i'm obsessed with him now and it needs to end it's embarrassing but uh yeah i've got a i've got a crush on diver city but it's because my kids are obsessed with them and it makes my life laura makes my life so much easier like parents please go and put it on secondly i have a couple of sweets in the space of a week it is my mom's birthday my nan's birthday my auntie's birthday and marley's birthday wow it's a busy time it is what happened nine months before now exactly I can't even remember not much yeah well apparently the tv was broken in all of our

households so we had like a little combined weekend birthday thing on Sunday and my nan's been in a nursing home for quite a while now all through COVID it was like a quite a sad time for her but her dementia is very very bad but we were able to bring her out of the nursing home for the day and spend some time with her and even though she kept saying who are those two belong to and I was like they're my children and it was still a really beautiful day so you know and I know that those moments are going to be few and far between with Nan and yeah it was just it was it was beautiful you hold on to those moments forever and you will they're the moments you will keep forever it was just a nice normal lunch but you'll remember it for a very long time yeah and also just

that my kids get to still be with their great grandma like I know that she won't remember it and I know that even Marley and Lola won't remember it but like we have those photos and yeah it's a really special time but anyway guys that is it from us a big whopping episode and We'll be back on Thursday with Ask Uncut. If you have any questions for Ask Uncut and you want to slide into the DMs, you can contact us at Life Uncut Podcast. Send us your question. Just write Ask Uncut at the top and we will do our best

to answer your question next week, this week, Wednesday, Thursday, who even knows, in like one day's time. Not tomorrow but the next day. Don't forget to tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friends and share the love because we love love. We'll be right back.