Life Uncut - How You Got Cold Played and What I Really Wish I Knew Before Motherhood

Episode Date: July 22, 2025

Hey lifers, We’re back from holidays! But are holidays really holidays when you have kids and you’re up at 5:30am?Laura has genuinely terrified a young surfer but she’s still got it (from behind). We took a week off and we are now a renovations/style podcast.We celebrated reaching 100 million downloads and our 6th birthday!!! We can’t thank you enough for hanging out with us throughout such different phases of our lives! We speak about the event that has GALVANISED us and ask you how you all got ‘coldplayed’ (how you found out you had been cheated on). Some of your answers were absolutely wild and our eyebrows are still raised. Women often ask themselves if they want to have children or not but maybe a more important question is ‘is this person the right person to have a child with?’ We unpack this substack written by Mad Bad Tea  We speak about how most people’s fears before having kids usually center around things like losing your identity or the impact it may have on your career but less focus seems to be on fears around resentment towards your partner for not stepping up to parenthood in an equal way. We speak about how your feelings around motherhood may be most impacted by the partner that you choose to parent with. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode was recorded on Camaragal land. Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Scarred and I'm Brittany. We just had a really uncomfortable conversation around how much would we have to pay each other to go down on each other. It's too hard knowing that you've got to work with the same person every day. Like Laura, I don't know. You've brought this up a few times.

Do you want me to go down on you? No. I don't get it. I have not. It's a recurring theme. Do not. The person who brought this up first was you, Brie. No.

It was you. It was you. You look guilty. No, because it makes me feel sick. It's not something I would do. Anyway, we're too close as friends. Not in that way. Are we going to answer what we said?

No. Let's just move right along. Welcome back from holidays, everyone. I did say that it would be at least one zero less for me to do it than for one of you guys. Keisha's doing it for free, guys. I'm not doing it for free. Anyway, look, we are back from holidays.

We took a week off. Sorry to come in very rogue. It was so nice. We've only taken two weeks off content or maybe two and a half. Who's counting? Yeah, not much this year. This entire year. Look, we needed a break.

I also love you guys, but I got so many messages being like, can you guys come back already? And I thought it's been three days. I was like I don't think we've even released an episode normally three days and I was like we just need one week give us a week yeah well it was school holidays the one thing though about school holidays is that when you're on holidays and your kids are also on holidays the amount of time and energy you have to put into trying to like come up with activities all day every day it was an activity day and so like I was telling you this yesterday Britt but like one morning we woke up

we were doing clay art we did puzzles and then we went to bowling that all happened before 11 30 a.m in the morning all of those things you peak too soon yeah but you've got to peak right do they just wake up at seven and say like what are we doing like let's crack on well okay so the problem is we were down at the ala dola house the one that we've been renovating and we have no curtains at all we haven't had curtains in that house since well like we haven't had curtains in the house at all you need blackout so that they still think it's midnight so we all wake up with sunrise right like we wake up with sunrise some days that's really really cute other days it sounds like this someone is ruining the serenity because

i don't know what you want what do you want to come here what do you want oh my god yeah so this is i mean to give context to that that was five a.m in the morning is she saying let's go no she's saying like okay the thing. Let's go! Let's fucking go! The first time I saw you play that on Instagram, I thought that's what she said. I thought she was in the bed going let's go! No!

Let's get the day started. She wanted Matt to go down to the car and get Lego out and he wouldn't get out of bed and go get the Lego. She was screaming Lego and then the two of them were in bed with us chanting Lego. Anyway, we've realised we need to get some curtains in that house. Oh my god, you do. Originally we thought, oh, it would be so nice to wake

up with a view and now it's like block it out. Just anything to try and like claw back an extra hour of sleep sneak a little sedative in there as well like blackout curtains melatonin yeah i don't know i don't know what's legal i don't i don't know how i feel about melatonin everyone talks about it and how they give their kids melatonin gummies and stuff to help them sleep more yeah i'm not about it i've never given it to our kids and i i just don't nah i'll look i'll wake up and get screamed out about lego i'm one of the few and i know that other people experience this so we've spoken about in the facebook group a little bit i get really

really weird dreams, like weird cooked dreams when I take melatonin. Do you? I get cooked dreams anyway. I mean, I know that it is meant to help kids sleep and it's like seemingly natural. I have not done research into it, guys. This is not a health podcast. Do not take any advice from me whatsoever. And I know some mums who use it and that's like their sleep time gummies. But I also kind of am just like, it's weird to give my personal thoughts. I feel like it's a little bit weird to give your kids something that is in any way hormone changing or medicinal or anything else to help them sleep at night time if they're not actually having really massive problems with sleeping Keisha's like I disagree it would depend on how bad it was well I feel the same as you

Brittany's just got whiskey on the dummy that's a trick they used to do yeah they also used to smack their kids with spoons talking about no curtains something did actually happen to me so our house like if you're following we've got the renovation page so you might have seen if you're not don't worry about it but i'll explain it to you basically our upstairs bedroom has this like beautiful big glass window which looks over the rock platform side of the beach horrific views it's awful i would hate it it's to be fair when we bought the house it was deemed as uninhabitable and the only redeeming feature of that house was the fact that it had that window in it like the rest of it was just it had snakes and a white ant it stunk but it had this amazing window which we

kept so like i said we've been contemplating whether or not we should get curtains and i was like no it's like we can wake up early there's so much privacy you can't see in because the only thing well you can see in the only thing that you really see is the ocean and then behind our house is this tiny little dirt track that leads down to the beach right and the only people who ever use it is like very rarely you'll get like one random surfer every like so basically you've got a private beach you've got a private track and your private house your private beach so no play on as you were Sorry, Keisha. Keep complaining about the kit.

Just note I've got to wear a snow jacket in my house to cook my dinner. But please. In your rental. So I am, as you guys know, very heavily pregnant now. I have nine weeks left. It's creeping up. Nine weeks? Nine and a half weeks.

Can you slow that down? I know, nine and a half weeks. Slow it down. Take some melatonin. Go to sleep. This is a very random fun fact. Do you know that kangaroos can pause pregnancies? No.

It's called embryonic diapause. is it yeah if times are bad kangaroos can pause the pregnancy until things are better that's one of the like we do a lot of random animal facts here it's probably one of the better ones i've ever heard kish thank you i'm gonna double check it so if you're hearing this i have fact checked it i remember learning about it in biology but frankly your pregnancy has seemingly gone very fast and i don't think nine weeks feels real it's nine and a half weeks but it's always interesting to me when other people tell me that my pregnancy's gone fast because i would say i don't feel the safe. I'm like, we're not ready. Sorry, that is correct. You don't have to fact check it.

They pause pregnancies. Amazing. Wow. You're on the case, Brit. Thanks. People say they don't learn anything here. Does anyone say that? No. Okay. So look, back on track. I am very pregnant now. My boobs are humongous. Actually, we were at the park recently and Marley was telling everyone that I have purple boobs now. And then she was asking me to show them because your nipples go darker when you're pregnant, right? They're purple. So I have really dark nipples. And yeah, Marley's like, Mom, show them. My mom's got purple boobs. You're like, no, I'm not going to show them.

And she was telling an entire family. So anyway, I'm in the shower, purple boobs, fat labia. Everything's just happening in this pregnancy. It's all gone downhill. We're all quick. And I walk out, put my towel around me, and I walk out to look at the view, to look at the ocean, to just enjoy because it's so beautiful and we have no curtains.

And I, like, opened my towel. Skipping Hayman Island. I opened my towel. to dry myself off and I heard an audible scream from the beach goat track and there was like a 20-year-old surfer who was looking up. You also know it's a problem that he didn't hide to continue watching. He screamed. No, I was looking out at the ocean so my eyeline was like horizon

and he's down there pretty much in our garden and I just heard this, and he stopped that's because think of the angle too think of his eyeliner was straight to the fat labia it was straight to the labia he didn't even see a face you were a faceless labia i just don't know why i was looking for why did you have to be naked to look for the whale i don't know it's really it's liberating I mean, you're talking to the person that did this in Hayman Island, to every single family. So I get it.

I feel you. There's no judgment. It's so uncomfortable wearing clothes and being pregnant. So I just, I was just enjoying a moment. That's so funny. And then I hid. Well, he's not using the GoTrack anymore, is he? I hid behind the wall and then I was like, can you see me?

I peeped out. And this guy, you know when, you know, you just can't escape because he just kept double taking. He was like, what the fuck was that? It's not what he wanted. it's probably not what he wanted it was really humbling to be honest yeah because i don't think i've ever had that reaction before i think i just arrived at a point in pregnancy where i was like okay well i think there's got to be something different like this is what we're dealing with

every young guy is going to want to see a naked chick in the window in their like mansion over the water like naked it's not a mansion everyone with their private yacht it was a dilapidated house was he on the helipad did you ride the quad bike to the helipad did you get the flying fox down the cliff. We took our white horses there. Every young kid wants to see someone naked in the window. I just think it cuts off at like three months pregnant. I think like when they're three months pregnant enough, they don't want it anymore. Four months, five months. I reckon you can get to like end of second trimester and people are still like, oh yeah. Like to be fair, I did have someone, this was a couple of weeks back now. Someone was clearly, don't want to

to moan horn was checking me out from behind she still got it eyes in the back of your head no no no they they called something out the window and it was when I was feel it it was when I was all dressed up and then I turned around and they look horrified so because from behind you have not changed like if you saw you from your pregnancies some people's pregnancies go round out the sides and some people grow out you grow out so like from behind you can't see your belly if there's anything we've learned from this for multiple reasons you need to get curtains yeah we're gonna do it it's happening actually this week so that's going to be an exciting update hold the phone i'll tell you all about when the curtains arrive i love that that's the solution where

the other solution is that you don't have to sugar glider out your you can just keep your towel on and put your clothes on well anyway guys how was your holiday update me please oh my yours sounds so much even with your kids yours sounds so much better than mine mine I went up to the Gold Coast for a week to stay with Sherry and Jay and to move into my new house so it's very exciting if you follow me on Instagram if you don't I posted that Ben and I took the next step in our relationship and we purchased our I mean it's a dream home one marital home our marital home yeah we purchased a home together which is like I don't know part of me feels like that's a bigger thing to do than get married yeah because marriage can end really

quickly if you want to totally marriage right if you've got nothing you can just divorce but then if you're married and you've got a house there's more you know to deal with and more to split and like it gets more complicated and I think that it's all of a sudden it's it's a commitment like it's a real joint finances it's a it's a big thing so anyway I felt like it was almost in a way bigger deal than getting married twice yeah for sure that's probably because your wedding was fake no but I'm really married now too so yeah we bought it we bought a beautiful home up there that I'm so happy with and we actually it turned out well it could have turned out bad but we bought it on our wedding night so like we had the wedding in Bali and then it was like 3 a.m

you know been frisky around we'd had our margaritas and whatever else and we're in bed and then an email came through that was basically like you need to put the offer in today like right now and so I just remember rolling over to bed and I was like I don't know if now's the time to do it like we've just had some espresso martinis so even though we're so exhausted. Wanted to go to bed. We were a bit pinging and everything just felt like we were on the wedding high and endorphin high. And so I don't know if it's at that time, if it was a couple of days later, I don't know if we would have done it. But at that moment I was like, yes, I fucking love you. I've got love hormones. I've got the endorphins. I've had the cocktails. Let's do it.

So let's get some depth. Yeah. Let's get into depth. So we put the offer in and we got it, which is really, it was really exciting. So now I feel like it's even more, you know, like the wedding day is even a bigger thing for us. Cause we, it was the day we went into, you know, the next chapter of our life for two reasons, but I'm not moving up there now. I'm just going to rent it out for a while. And hopefully one day it is the place that I'll end up. My sister Sherry's up there. So that was really, really exciting. And I got so much love from you guys. It's actually so nice to take everyone on a journey and you know, everyone that has followed along Life Uncut and my journey for so long, everyone was really so supportive and so happy. And it's so nice to feel

like you have people that are rooting for you. Can I just ask, are we a renovations podcast now? because like all of us have entered a new phase of adulthood and Keisha you were posting about painting doors on your house like what happened to us because five years ago we're all hot messes we're still hot messes yeah I think I've accidentally taken some like you know how they say that you are an amalgamation of the people that you spend yeah like the five people that you're closest to I think I've accidentally turned into Delilah osmosis rage bait content from you Laura because Tobes and I bought our first place a couple of months ago it's the first time I've ever owned a house before and I moved out of home when I was 18 it was a huge deal for me like

I've been saving for this for literally my entire life and you know put deposit down and then you got to wait the weeks for settlement and blah blah blah and I do love to do DIY stuff but the other thing is is that I'm nearly 32 and I've lived in rentals for that entire time so 14 years of cream walls that you're not allowed to change that you're not allowed to hang a picture hook into and it has just been it's been the best feeling just being like I'm allowed to hang a photo on the wall and like I'm allowed to change a color of something that I don't like and so I've been removing wallpaper and I've been painting the front doors and painting the rooms and and now I'm in that thing where you know how when you start one thing it makes it obvious how for example I

painted one of the bedrooms and I did all the skirting boards and then I was like oh now the skirting boards in the hallway look shit yeah and now the skirting boards in the other room look shit oh the DIY never ends it's a flow on effect yes and so now I'm painting the whole house I do I went over to Keisha's a couple of days ago and it was the moment where we looked at each other and we're like is this our life now we're just like sitting in her room staring at like paint samples on walls they're like one shade different five she's like what do you reckon And I was like, I can't really tell the difference. She's like, I really need to decide.

Couldn't tell. I feel like I'm still on the excitement wave. It might die out soon. It does. Hyperfixations don't last very long. That's like me and houseplants. They're all dead now, to be fair. You guys might have seen on socials that we celebrated 100 million downloads, which is

absolutely, utterly insane. And we mentioned it in the social video, but I think it's worth mentioning here because we are just so, we're so, so grateful for you guys. And we're so lucky for the community that's been built. 100 million when you think about it how big that is was five times the population of australia like three and a half but that's okay go five go i'm hearing 10 i'm hearing 10 but it's so big and it's so easy and we were guilty of it it's so easy to brush over these huge milestones and not brush over them i guess like you clock them but sometimes you need to really sit in it and be like this is

actually insane i think it's something that we all do though right it's not just something that we're guilty of no everyone does it everyone does it there's so many amazing things that happen in life that we are, you know, either that thing that you've always wanted, that you've always been working for and you've worked so hard to achieve it and then you get it. But because your sight is so already fixed on the next thing, because you have this ambition and we're all kind of subscribed to hustle culture, you don't celebrate the milestones when they come. And then they're so quickly that they pass by and you're like, oh, okay, well that happened. Now I've got to achieve the next thing. And then all of a sudden you're 50. And then there's nothing wrong

with being 50 I'll be there no I mean like okay let me rephrase that all of a sudden 20 years has gone past like you know like you don't stop and smell the roses and I think when you look back accumulatively like how amazing those like small milestone moments or big milestone moments are it's so important to appreciate them and like genuinely so much of that comes down to every single one of you who listens to an episode we are deeply and forever grateful and then also part of that is that we had our sixth birthday as well so six years of life uncut in the world I know it's funny that we're all joking about doing DIY renovations and everything, but to think about where we were when we started the pod, which was just you and me in a bedroom, Britt, with a baby. And that rented studio that we bought, remember?

Oh, no, we didn't even buy it. We rented it. We rented a per hour studio where you hired it. And it was like a tension. The audio was so bad. Actually, we should put some old posts up from it. No, we are not. Oh, posts.

Yeah, we're not putting the audio. We just got it done because we loved everything about being able to create this podcast. Do you know what I will say? I loved it at the time. I'm not proud of it now. When you say let's put some photos up from that time, it was my beret era. I just wore a – I loved a beret.

And I've got the first photo that popped to mind when you're like, let's put some photos up. There's a photo that we took in there and it's a selfie and I've got like a denim skirt on and a white shirt and I had this brown corduroy beret and I loved it. So I wore it in our like proper official photos. It was our first ever like, you know, the thumbnail for your podcast, Brit's wearing a beret.

Is it a beret? It's like the little, it looks like a beret, but it has the brim. It's like an old man train cap. Yes. It's what my papa. Like a Brixton hat. I loved it. It's what my papa used to wear.

He never would leave the house without it, but that's because he was balding. Brit, maybe the same reason for you at the time. What? My double crown. You'd come through so many hairstyles. You also had jet black hair at the time as well. Yeah, it was so dark. Because that's when I used to dye my hair myself with a pack of mugs.

It was just black. Look at where we've come to. So anyway. That was the funniest thing about going back through the 100 million video. The funniest thing is that Laura looks, it could have been taken yesterday. Any of the videos could have been taken yesterday. She looks so the same. Who am I?

Britt looks like a different person in every single different clip. It was so funny to just watch the transition. Britt was like, were you ever the same? And I was like, I've had a rough 10 years, okay? I'm trying to find out who I am. That was a, it was so cool to see like how many, let's call them crises, how many crises I went through in the 10 years. That's also why when it was your hands party, my vote was that we should have dressed up

as a Britney era. So everyone should have come as like one version of Brit because there's been so many to choose from. I'll do that for my 40th. 30th. No, for my 30th in a couple of years. Well, something else that happened while we were on holidays, and I know the whole entire world is talking about it and we don't want to get into the nitty-gritty of this because the memes

the memes have come they are still coming every podcast is unpacked under the sun and that is the Coldplay affair we saw it we followed the wave and look it was joyful for a while and then it got kind of weird and now we don't really know how we feel about it I absolutely loved it I have loved being on the Coldplay journey the last couple of days it feels like it's been months it's literally hasn't even been a week I think but at this point now we spoke this morning I was like I actually just feel really sorry for the family like for the rest of them that I can't imagine like probably the bullying and the things that the kids are getting like that's horrible but we cannot deny that the memes that came off the back of this are going to go down in history also I

kind of loved and you know don't get me wrong when I say at the same time I'm like has it gone too far I kind of love that a lot of brands have used it as like funny marketing advertising so there's been like some jewelry brands who are like some apologies are bigger than just sorry you need diamonds. Brilliant that everyone has jumped on this. And it happens maybe once or twice a year that something goes so viral that it kind of transcends every version of whether it's like pop media, mainstream media, podcasting, like it takes over everything. And that is what this has done. It galvanizes us, Laura. It brings us together. It triangulates us. I'm an NRL girl and so many of the cameras, like, you know, the thing I love about it is you see the kiss cam

now and it's just funny and then there was one at Nikki Glaser's uh comedy show with Hamish Blake and Lisa Wilkinson like I love that side of it but also there's been a really interesting debate that's come up and like like I said we won't get into it but I would love to know everyone's thoughts around this like in terms of obviously the memes and everything are really funny we know that there are real people at the bottom of this and then there's real families that are affected the problem is is you don't really hear from them they've kind of just gone silent removed their socials so like they've removed themselves from it as much as possible but I guess the thing is it comes into question this idea of public shaming especially when it is linked to cheating because

cheating normally goes unchecked in our system of morale in our system of like the legal system cheating is that one thing that hurts so much but there is no punitive punishment for it right like that people can cheat and then they get away with the damage that they do and so this is kind of one of those moments where people feel vindicated because everyone's been cheated on. Everyone knows how much that hurts. And so I think that we've really reveled in this idea of the payback to the big CEO boss who's now punished for having an affair. I think it transcends that now. I don't think it's just about that. I think a lot of people don't even care about it. They're just using it as a comedy step up. Like that's what it's become. It's just become, like you said,

marketing, PR, funny. People are laughing about it, enjoying about it. They're enjoying making content I think that it's the it's the commonality it's the fact that we can all relate to this experience and there's this like haha fuck you you got caught moment in this that we think is really funny it's the schadenfreude you know that word where it's like you take joy in someone else's misery yeah and Ness actually brought up a really good point yesterday where we were talking about it as I think everybody was and she said that there was a particular element of this one because he is such a rich powerful wealthy man totally there's very much that kind of like usually you guys get away with it. You know, usually you have so much power and so much money that you're never

held accountable. It's kind of like eat the rich vibes. I have a question for you. Do you think though that something like this, like a public cheating scandal should come with employment punishment or financial punishment? The woman involved was the manager of the HR department and he is the CEO of quite a big company. Yeah. And I want to say no, unless you have legal obligations within your workplace, which they may have had that says you can't fraternize with somebody else at the work. We've all read those in contracts before, haven't we? No fraternising with their employees.

That's what it is. And I think it's a lot bigger in America than it is here. Like I think Americans are bigger on that, like especially people that might be in power in the employment, like the CEO, that you may have to disclose if you are in a relationship with someone. Like they might have their own internal legal documents that cover that, which is why they've stepped down. I don't think an affair necessarily should result.

No, I don't. It's situational, but I don't think an affair, generally speaking, should result in people losing their jobs they have to be seen to have been making a stance to protect their company and the shares and the people that have invested in that company because it is the number one thing talked about in the entire world i think more so than like a financial punishment i think it's they've got to try and protect their brand management that's why i think it's completely fine that these people are forced to step away but something that i find a little bit more like i'm a little bit more curious about is whether you think that it shows the morals of

the person yeah and whether that affects like business opportunity like for example let's say that I was coming to join Life Uncut as a business and I was about to be like a stakeholder in the business of Life Uncut and you found out that I had been cheating on my partner do you think that that shows what I would be like in the workplace like I don't think it necessarily does but I think in this instance and the reason why people have felt so strongly about it and the irony in it is that being that she is the head of HR which is supposed to be obviously human resources they're the people that are supposed to manage these sorts of internal affairs that happen and when there's drama him being the CEO the whole conversation around the imbalance of power I think that that's

why this feels a lot murkier and it feels a lot worse than say if they were just general employees who had been having an affair but I understand that he's the person in power here but it does seem like she's getting away relatively unscathed in comparison and obviously she's copped a lot of heat as well I'm not saying she's unscathed but if you're comparing the two we definitely have a lot more disdain for the middle-aged white man in power in this situation as opposed to the woman I don't know I find that really interesting but I do think the only reason it has blown up to the level it has we see people cheated on all the time like public figures people on the regular we see it constantly but we don't really care about it like lots of people get caught in the act but

The difference with this was it was their reaction. That's what set it apart. And if they were shown on the screen for a couple of seconds and they were normal, nothing happened, and someone ended up recognising them, the affair would have come out, but it wouldn't have done what it did. It's not that they had an affair. It was their reaction that then catapulted to where it was.

Yeah, just so everyone takes note, if you're ever going to have an affair and you get caught on Kiss Cam, just wave and smile. Smile away, boys. Just smile away. Literally. Well, look, we asked you guys the question on socials. how have you been cold played? How did you find out that your partner at the time was cheating on you? And like, like we said, we know that cheating is evil and it's immoral. Is it something

that should be legally punished or workplace punished? Who knows? That's for everyone else to have their opinions decided upon. We would love you guys to weigh in. You can do that on the socials, but here are some of the reasons that you guys found out you had been cheated on. I'm going to kick off with one of the best. I walked in on my mom and boyfriend making out in the kitchen. No. What? Absolutely unsubscribe.

Yeah. Could you imagine emancipate yourself? Is that what it is? Yeah, emancipate. Yeah. You cut your parents off. Divorce your parents, it is. Your mum and your boyfriend.

Imbalance of power. I reckon that stuff happens more than you think. No, that's awful. What a wretched mum you would have to be. What's a dinner mum? You've got one job and it's not to like fuck your daughter's boyfriend. And teach them trigonometry. if you've got any natural loyalty you'd think it would go to your kid oh that's so that's so sad

okay oh i love this one because i felt like we had a part in this in a small tiny way a long time ago we're having a conversation on this podcast about the website what's actually a facebook page it's called sis is this your man and people out cheaters on there you're not supposed to talk about it i'll probably get blocked keisha already has been a block yeah we're blocked one of you guys wrote in and said i found out from sis is this your man after you guys specifically spoke about the page on an episode. I went on there and then found my boyfriend at the time and other women talking about how he cheated on them. Isn't that awful? I know, but I'm glad. I feel like we were a little bit like the vigilantes in that to help that sort of move along. This is a bit more tragic.

My friend was cheating on her long-term boyfriend with a security guard at the pub that she worked at. One night they both went for a drive and had a really bad car accident and she broke her back in a few places. And that is how her partner found out she was cheating. Oh, that's awful. She's okay now as a follow-up. What do you do, though, in that situation? Yeah, because you're supposed to be there for your partner and look after them when they've had this tragic accident, but then also their side piece is literally there in the hospital with you.

All right. My ex-partner was kissing a girl in the background of some random nightclub photos. It got circulated around until it finally came to me. So obviously someone had seen it on Instagram. They're just in the background by pure dumb luck, and that's how she's found out. Devastating.

I was with my partner for seven years, and then my doctor told me I had chlamydia. That's not funny. It's not funny. That actually happened to my. Me. No. That actually happened to my vagina.

When I was with that psycho guy that had a double life, that happened to the other woman. She had been with him for like six years and found out she had chlamydia too. Oh, that sucks. That's really sad. How about this one? I walked in on my boyfriend wanking over photos of my best friend. Oh, this is a different one.

I got that too, but not the best friend. I just walked in on him wanking over her. Oh, no. I walked in on him wanking over photos of my best friend. Long story short, my bestie at the time got pregnant, told me it was with one guy, and a year later I found out that it was my husband's baby. Well, he was my ex-husband because we split about a week

and a half after the baby was conceived. He just never told me it was his at the time. Imagine your husband coming to you and saying, I think we have to split up, but not telling you it's because he has another baby on the way. And more than nine months later, you find out that one of your best friends, who's like illegitimate baby is actually your husband's. Oh my God.

She probably like went to the baby shower. I just got goosebumps. She's probably a godmother. Sorry. This one's pretty grim. We got emails to our joint email account, registering him to dating apps. Oh, that's sad. I found a box of used girls G-strings hidden in his cupboard.

He kept them as trophies. That's weird. Trophies? He went overseas on a holiday, so I made a fake Tinder account and set my location there, and I found him active on holidays. That's investigative work. A text came up on his phone from Domino's. I love pizza, so I wanted to check what the deal was.

I wanted to check what the deal was. Obviously, I clicked into it. It was not from Domino's. A plus for creativity. I've got more. someone I knew from work took a picture of him boarding a plane with another woman and said is this your husband he had told me that he was going on a work trip this one's a little like less savage a Woolworths everyday rewards account he scanned his card when he bought her food

that's also the same as how the mushroom killer got found out because she was scanning she scanned her rewards card that's how they knew she bought all the mushrooms and where she bought them from I'm sorry. Okay. I really enjoyed that podcast. I found his gratitude journal. The problem is he was detailing his gratitude about his double life. Not only did I find out my boyfriend was cheating on me,

I also found out that he was bisexual because I found dick pics in his email followed by in-depth details around how they'd been sucking each other off. I confronted him about it in Bondi Westfields and he cried. Poor thing. That's awful. There's a lot going on in his life. Okay, I've got one more.

My partner went to their family holiday house in Jindabyne for a ski session. I saw that my ski pass was being used. So when I said to him, why is my ski pass being used? He said, I just missed you and wanted to use it. And she said, well, why is yours being used too? So he gave her. He took his girlfriend there. He took the extra.

Like the other girl there and then used his actual partner's ski, gave her the ski pass to use. Which is linked to her credit card. Well, yes, you get notification. If you have like a season pass, you can log the times it's scanned and that kind of thing. But when you're wearing ski gear, they can't really tell that you're someone different.

But that's such a stupid one because he could have said, oh, I gave it to a maid or anything. Why a girlfriend? He panicked and said, I missed you so I wanted to use it. She's like, cool, why are you using yours as well? This one, okay, my boyfriend was a musician. He was on tour and he took a photo, a selfie reflection in the mirror and there was a girl in his bed in the background.

This one's less savage but I bought something on Marketplace. I went to pick it up and his car was parked in the driveway next door. What are the chances? Oh, what are the chances? You're just trying to get a secondhand bargain. Catch him in the act. I feel like some of these, it's almost like there's a divine being out there that was like, you need to know this.

And so we're going to lead you. We've given you all the signs. We've tried to show you in every other way. So here's the source. I was in such denial when I was in my bad relationship where there was lots of cheating that I literally found another woman's underwear in his bedroom and he managed to like lie around it and tell me that it was his other housemates and then somehow they must have thought

it was his and brought it, you know what I mean? Like he managed to lie around it because he was the only one who had a girlfriend. The other ones were having casual flings. And so he was like, oh, well, there was girls' undies in the house. We just assumed they were yours and so now they're in my room. And I was like, but how did my undies get in someone else's room? Like I didn't even think through the logistics of it.

i just believed him yeah and i we were just saying before we started this record like i'm mortified when i think of my younger self and how many flags were like literally whipping me in the face and i chose not to see them but i think that's the problem you choose to see what you want to see and you choose if you are just so desperate to be in that relationship and for it to not be true you convince yourself that you're believing him or sorry them i should say because women cheat too but you convince yourself that you're believing them and everything that they say and even though like your subconscious is saying to you this is ludicrous like you've seen the photos you've seen them together people have told you your brain just says I don't want that I'm gonna box that away and

I'm gonna believe what he said and continue on and I would never do that now and I cringe thinking about what I used to do can I admit to you guys the craziest way I found out to be fair we weren't like exclusively dating but we pretty much should have been you know we were at that point and I remember he went away and in an Instagram story you know how you can tag a location so he tagged a location and I just had that gut feeling I was like this guy's sus like something weird's going on his communication's been really withdrawn since he's been away and I clicked on the location and you know how in the story section of the location you can see anyone else who's uploaded a story that's got a public profile in the last 24 hours well there she was same location

tagged the same place, and I was like, still dating him for six months. He's like, we're not dating. Back to what you were saying. We're not actually boyfriend and girlfriend. Really? But you weren't even together. We were. We were.

It was to the point where I was like. Semantics. Yeah. Keisha, did he know who you were? We had this discussion before we even had our holiday. That's how long we've been sitting on this. it's a sub stack that came up and written by a person named mad bad tea we'll link it in the show notes if you want to go and read it but it is called what i really wish i knew before motherhood

it covers quite a few things around the perception of motherhood the realities of motherhood verse i guess the romanticized version that the writer had prior to actually becoming a mother themselves but one of the really big things that we wanted to talk about is and i know brit it's something that we've spoken about quite a bit between us and also on the podcast the big question we seem to kind of go between as women is do you or don't you want to have children you know and that's one thing that you've raised quite a few times is this like pendulum swing between do I want kids do I not want kids the thing and the question that's raised in this sub stack which I found so deeply interesting is the question is more so around do you want to have children with the person that

you're actually with. And part of what is unpacked is that maybe the biggest and greatest defining factor as to whether a person actually truly enjoys motherhood or not doesn't so much come down to the experience of motherhood or the experience of children, but it comes down to who that person is that you choose to have children with. I'll read you some of the things that she says quite early on. A few people did try to warn me. They'd ask, are you sure you want to do this with him? So not, are you sure you want to do this, but are you sure you want to do this with him. But because I had such a fake romanticized version of motherhood in my head, I didn't really understand what they were saying. I thought they would just be negative. I thought

love would carry us through. Now I get it. What they were really saying is this is going to break you open and you need to be with somebody who knows how to hold you when it does. I come from it from somebody that is on the fence that isn't sure. And I haven't done it. I haven't experienced it. So I am this person. I am mad bad tea. When I read this, I resonated so much with it. choosing your partner who is going to be your partner in life who is going to be the father to your kids is the most important thing when you're choosing to have a child do you agree with that statement yeah look I feel incredibly deeply grateful and lucky that I am with Matt and like obviously I speak about him lots on the pod like you guys if you follow us like you know

what he's like I mean he's got a podcast called two doting dads he is essentially a very doting dad I got so fucking lucky because I just fumbled my way through all these shitty relationships you know I had big very big and serious relationships before Matt one or two of them I would have said yes if they'd asked me to marry them it was so toxic it was so bad but I think I thought that if we got to the stage of being married that it would show that they'd had commitment for me and that that then we'd be on a good trajectory do you know what I mean like I think I did exactly that I didn't romanticize the motherhood part because motherhood was never something that was essential to me but I romanticized the relationship and I always was

able to excuse bad behavior because we were on this journey towards getting good and being like a better version of ourselves. We were always like a version that I could fix if we could just get here, but we were never there yet, if that makes sense. And then I started dating Matt and it was just always good. And it was just always easy. And then we had kids and he's an incredible dad and he shows parody in every way. And one of the things I think about often is like, imagine if I had fucking procreated with one of those men who I thought I wanted to marry prior and how hard my life would be because truly and deeply, I think one of the greatest enjoyments I get out of motherhood is doing it as a team with Matt. And I think that if I was

doing it on my own, I would find it a hell of a lot harder. Like I have so much respect for single moms. I was raised by a single mom. And that is not something that a lot of people go into motherhood expecting that they're going to endure. And then they reach that destination and their partner hasn't stepped up to the plate in the way that they hoped. And their experience of motherhood is really challenging. Well, there is another paragraph that she says, my tip, do not have a baby for a man. Do not believe a man when he says he'll be there for you and it will be 50-50. It is never 50-50 when it comes to motherhood. I am no pro at this. It is just a sad reality. Only have a baby if you want to be a mother. You could and are happy to

do it alone and financially you are independent and secure. That for me is a paragraph that makes me deeply uncomfortable and makes me really think twice, not twice, I think a hundred times, you know, I think twice about it every day. This is the thing that really makes me check myself because I think what a lot of people don't realize is you do have to be okay with being a single parent because we know the divorce rate is so high we know that if couples do split up the man generally speaking has weekend visitations has them like 25 25 it is you can you can argue the point that some men have them full-time of course that is not that is not normal not full-time but I think that increasingly now people have 50 50 share of parenthood I would disagree not one split

family that I know has 50-50 and that's because kids need stability it's a choice that parents make because most of the time they when they're at school they need to have the same environment the same routine the same household and that's usually why one parent takes them on a weekend like it's not because one parent's saying I want them more it comes down to what's best for the child it's pretty unusual to find 50-50 where you're splitting a child midway through a school week but I think that that's something that we don't really think about we fall in love with somebody and we want to make mini-me's and we love the idea of being this beautiful united family. And if you've married someone, chances are it's because you think that they are this

incredible person that you want to spend your life with. And I hope that that does happen. Realistically, there are a lot of divorces. And I guess this is the part that really hit home for me where she said, you need to make sure when you're making that choice that you could be okay to do a lot of it on your own. That's a really scary thought that I think a lot of people might not consider see I didn't interpret that as being on your own in terms of divorce I interpreted that as carrying the load within your own marriage and I think that that's something that we see is that there are a lot of parents and mums who carry the entire load and I think that often and I really don't want to stereotype this because I know that there are so many great dads out there

and like I feel very genuinely lucky to be in a family where Matt is that he is the version of a parent that carries an equal load. But I know also from a lot of my friends and also from people who are close to me that their partners really just haven't stepped up to the plate in the same way that they have to, because as a mom, you don't get a choice. You have to step up to the plate in every single way. And the thing is, is like, we know what weaponized incompetence is. We know that there is the mental load, like there's so many conversations about this, these things. So I would say that when she's describing this, she's not just describing raising a kid on your own in terms of divorce. She's describing a situation where you are the one doing the

majority of the parenting in something that you may have been led to believe was going to have parity. And it isn't always the case in within every relationship. But there was some things in this sub stack. And like I said, we're going to link it so that you can read through all of it, because there are some parts of it that I deeply agree with. And there are some parts of it where I do think that there has been this overcorrection. And I know Britt, we have different opinions on this. I think there has been an overcorrection. I think that there is so much conversation around how hard motherhood is now online. And what was a surprise for me is how much I deeply enjoyed it. Because I think I was so mentally prepared for it to be really, really challenging. Like I really

thought it was going to be the absolute pressure cooker in our relationship. I remember when I told Matt that I was pregnant, especially because we weren't planning the very first pregnancy. I was like so fearful of how his reaction was going to be and whether he was going to leave whether he was going to be committed like I just didn't know how that was going to go down and then I think for me I had this genuine surprise by how fun and how much I enjoyed motherhood all of the hard bits were absolutely true and I was very lucky that I didn't have postpartum depression but I was surprised by the joy that it brings and I look back and maybe it's one of those things. Who knows? Maybe it seemed like, you know, how we're like, we're geared to

only remember the good stuff and not the bad stuff. Every time I look back through my camera roll from when the kids are really little age and I see them doing something cute or something that I've captured, I'm like, oh my God, that age was so fun. You forget everything else. And you forget the sleepless nights and you forget the pressure it puts on your relationship. But I do get pregnant with your third. You forget so much. You just want to have another baby in the house. But don't get me wrong I think going into this pregnancy and I was saying it to Ness our video editor literally yesterday it's the most neutral I've ever felt like I feel and I don't want to say the least excited because that's a sounds like an awful thing to say but I feel the most realistic about

it and so that realism has kind of muted my level of like oh my god another baby because in my mind I'm like all right I know that first year is going to be hard I know we're not going to get a lot of sleep. I know I'm going to be tapped out again and touched out. I know it's going to put pressure on my relationship with Matt. I know that we're not going to have as much time for each other. There's not going to be as much intimacy. I know all of those little sacrifices. Some of them are big, some of them are micro, but I know what they are and I know that they're coming. So I have a very different feeling about this pregnancy. Well, because you have a lived experience now, you know, number one, you, nothing. It's the most foreign thing you've ever done. It's like

starting a brand new job in a brand new country with a person you don't know. I see it a different way, Laura. I am begging for people to tell me the truth. I loved reading this article for how blunt and open and honest she was about it. And she does bookend it with, but it is wonderful and it is the best thing. And she does say that. She does the motherhood trope. It's shit, but it's great. Well, I don't want anyone to think that this article is just, she's just shatting on the whole thing. She's not, but she is saying things that I have been begging people to tell me. And this is somebody, I scour the internet every day. There are accounts that I follow that are dedicated to deciding if you want kids. Like there are psychology accounts that are

like, these are the things you ask yourself. These are the things you write down. These are things you discuss with your partner. Like I am constantly on the lookout for this stuff. It consumes my entire thought process. If you look through the articles that Ben and I send each other constantly in like our WhatsApp, we are always sending each other articles on pregnancy, kids, life, partners, you know, we're thinking about it so thoroughly. And I was always begging for somebody to tell me the truth. I always ask my friends and family. And when I say, tell me the truth, people always say how hard it is. People say you don't sleep. And we all know that it's hard. I know that it's hard, but I wanted the really raw, break it open truth. Like I want the people to

tell me, think of the worst thing you've ever done. And it's worse than that. And I'm happy for them. And I'm not saying that, but I just want real truth. And there are some people that have said, I'm obsessed with it. I love it. That's their truth. And that is great. But I just felt like on the internet I was being fed a lot of stuff that's like oh haven't slept again but oh my god look at his little smile like it makes me and I'm like I just don't want to know that you didn't sleep I want to know what that no sleep looks like I want to know that it was for eight hours of 10 you were awake you know why why do you want that because I want to be armed with you can't return it you know like I'm such a person that's I'm happy to move to another country

tomorrow it's okay because if I don't like it I can move back for me this is by far the biggest decision and most important decision I will ever make in my entire life I'm like I get so upset like I've just never been more scared to make a decision like I'm petrified and I'm running out of time right no it's like it's just like it's a really real thing for me like I know that there's a part of this article that I was like yeah that's me there are some people that want to be mums and dads so badly that they're okay to do it on their own and that's amazing but I know there's not one part of me that wants to do it on my own yeah and I said to Ben you know a couple of nights ago I said if we break up I don't want to do this on my own and like that's something that we need to

think about and he's like why are we going to break up we just got married and I said literally but it's like I'm such a realistic person and of course I've married Ben for the rest of my life that's what our intention is absolutely is right of course that's the whole point that is what everybody's intention is that you have kids and a family, you get married to be with that person forever. But I'm so realistic and it's so ingrained in me that I know what the other side looks like. And on top of that, my situation's a bit different. Ben is foreign. I don't know if he's going to want to move back. You know, I don't know if I'm going to end up being a single mom and he would never abandon his kids. I'm not saying that, but you just don't know the future

when someone's whole life is in another country. And that kind of scares me because I'm not, I don't want it enough to be on my own. It's also complicated because, and I understand people won't understand what I'm about to say, because as much as I've always talked about being on the fence, Ben and I have been trying for two and a half years. Like since we met, because I knew my fertility was not great, we've always said, you know what, like we're not going to be upset if it happened, you know, we don't not want them. So we always thought, let's just let nature take its course.

and if we fall then amazing we don't have to do IVF and we've never been able to fall pregnant and so I wonder and I can't work it out in myself I can't work out if my feelings are tied to that are tied to some protection mechanism yeah I genuinely do not know and that makes me even more confused and upset because I can't differentiate the feelings and what's causing the feelings well I think you've nailed it when you spoke about it on a past episode when you're like having IVF or going through IVF makes it a definitive date. Whereas there's something around the spontaneity of just like spontaneously getting pregnant. It's taken out of your control, but going, okay, I know that we want this so much that we are going to book IVF now.

It's a different take because I would say that most people who book IVF, it's because they've tried every other option and they desperately want a baby. So I know that there will be people who listen to this who are like no I fucking tried everything and I wanted that so bad and I did everything and I paid all the monies to be here you know that's that's one experience of this and then there is the other experience of like I don't know which means that then I'm now having to make big emotional decisions and also big financial decisions and big lifestyle decisions around something that I'm just not sure about and I guess the thing is is there is no sub stack article. There is no conversation that you're going to have with any single person that's going

to allow you to feel like yes or no is the right answer. Do you know what I mean? Because everyone's experience is different. And you know where it gets confusing and I know there'll be a lot of people listening that feel exactly the same way. And I remember Laura Henshaw spoke a lot about it when she was really confused as well. And I messaged her at the time saying just everything you've said is in my brain. Like I feel the same. And we sort of spoke about that a little bit. And I know there's so many women that feel the same. The problem is there are the people that say you need to want to be a parent, to be a parent because it's so hard, right? Like you need to want it. If you're unsure, don't do it. But that doesn't work because you're also unsure you don't

want it. So it puts you in a really tricky place where I don't know if I can believe saying if you're not a hundred, if you're still on the fence, don't do it. I don't know if I believe that because if you are unsure that you don't want it then 10 15 20 years could go past and imagine the feelings that you feel of regret and resentment and whatever other feelings are attached to that because you weren't decided either way it's just like one of them the most I want to call it fertility purgatory that's how I feel and I know a lot of people feel like that that they are stuck in this place and the pendulum is swinging and there is society and life and biology that is pressuring you one way yeah you know if I could fall pregnant I would have had a

baby by now because that's how long we've been trying for so then it's just adds so many different layers for me and I guess that is what I need to try and dissect and articles like this and maybe that's why you know everyone that knows me knows I ask them in detail about their experience everyone in my life and that might be why because all of these outside external factors are playing a part internally for me. Can I just say though, coming back to this sub stack, because I think that the answer in this woman's negative experience around motherhood lies in what is the most important point. And that is your partner makes or breaks the whole thing. And I do want to read this. I think that so many women will relate to this. The man you have a child with will either hold you

through the storm or leave you drowning in it. I believed mine would show up. He told me that he would protect me. He promised to love me, safety and stability. But here's what I've learned the hard way. Most men today are not providers. Most are not protectors. They are lost, addicted and immature. And yet women still choose them because we are conditioned to fall in love with potential and with promises. But promises mean nothing in pregnancy. Only actions matter. And when the actions don't come, you are left pregnant and alone or with a child and alone. Trying to survive postpartum without sleep, money, or emotional support, you are holding life and no one is holding you. Your partner's behavior before, during, and after pregnancy will shape your

entire motherhood experience. I genuinely feel that this is such a huge factor in people's enjoyment of the motherhood experience that we don't talk about until your kid is two or three or four or five and you realize you're fucking resentful at your partner and you're angry and you're not enjoying where your life is at. If the red flags are there, really sit with yourself and have a conversation around, is this the person that I want to have a baby with? And I know that that is incredibly like holding a mirror up to yourself and really going to be so daunting for some people. But that is such a determining factor because if you're going to go at it alone, then that's a bigger decision to make when it comes to parenting. You have to be okay with

this idea that you're grappling with Brit, where you say, you know, do I want to do it on my own? which is crazy I don't want anyone to think there's like problems you know like there's not it's just the consideration for you know the future totally but I think I do think that for a great deal of us and I relate this back to the person I was before I got into a relationship with Matt all of those red flags were there had I had a kid with any you know the two exes I have in mind I would have done it on my own they would have disappointed me because I was in love with the potential of what our relationships could have been and everything I saw us being in the future but we were never that and they were never ever the types of people who were going to provide that

as a parent or as a father and then I look at the person that Matt has been consistent stable kind loving enthusiastic about being a dad so willing to make sacrifices to be a dad so willing to deprioritize himself going out with the boys friendships partying like he doesn't do I mean like of course he still has friends but like his friends go to the park with the kids yeah he's not going to the pub with the boys like there's so many sacrifices that we as mums make that feeling like you have a partner that shows parity in those sacrifices absolutely makes you feel like you're a team and I think that that is such a huge fucking factor in whether being a mum is an enjoyable thing or not I think my take on this was that and I have a lot of the same questions as you

minus the overseas question I think the whole motherhood conversation I've had a fear about whether I would become resentful you know resentful of losing certain parts of myself resentful of being in really bad depression ways I know Sam Frost spoke on the podcast about that and I really related to her saying like I was so scared because I already had mental health issues and I didn't know what would happen you know I didn't know if they would get so bad and I've I've kind of had this and I get emotional thinking about it too because I'm like I'm scared that I could resent the kid and be a shit parent because I'm so angry and I'm so depressed yeah but this article really like what you're saying where it's kind of like maybe that's actually not what a lot of people

feel maybe people feel resentment towards their partner for not showing up as a parent you know the a number of conversations I have with people I've had conversations with friends who are like my life is easier when my partner goes away if they go away on a work trip or they go away with boys or whatever it looks like parenting is easier I think more often than not the resentment comes towards the partner and the relationship pressures I don't really know many people who feel resentful towards their children and maybe it is maybe we're leaving to here maybe it's a case of like no one wants to speak negatively about their kids or about motherhood but I genuinely don't know many people at all who would ever say that they regret motherhood you know there's parts of it

that they found really hard but I do think the reason why it comes with the caveat of like but I love being a mum is because yes we complain about it but like for the most part people fucking love their kids and love being a mum I know that's not the blanket rule for everyone but like yeah generally hard-pressed to find someone who doesn't say that or doesn't feel that it is time for our suck in a sweet our highlights and lowlights of each and every week my suck for the week is that I have raging sciatica at the moment I got it really bad with Lola uh kind of second trimester so I do feel like I've gotten through pretty scot-free this I had literally had just said maybe about two weeks ago I was like this has been my easiest pregnancy ever which kind of

goes against all reason and logic you would think by number three my whole body should be like stop but it's been great and then all of a sudden the sciatica hit and it's like if you've never had it it's just I mean my experience of it is the fucking most intense pain that shoots kind of from your lower spine straight down your ass cheek and into the back of your leg there's nothing they can do to get rid of it once it starts I couldn't walk for a couple of nights there when we were down the coast I had to get Matt to get me up and down off the couch and it has been super super painful it's worse in the evenings but I've gone to go and see a physio already which is something I didn't do with my second trimester like sorry with my second pregnancy I didn't go at all or do

anything to try and fix it and it made a massive difference and that came off the recommendation of someone who listens to the pod who was like oh my god my sciatica was so bad when I had my baby and the only thing that fixed it was going to the physio so it's already fixed it's not fixed by any means but it definitely helped a lot like a lot I went from not being able to walk of an evening to instantly feeling relief and he basically just elbowed my ass for 25 minutes that's so yeah but Sometimes that's what you need, a little elbow up the butt. Not in the butt, like just straight elbow to the butt cheek. But, you know, you do you, go off queen.

And my sweet for the week was just, I've already said it, but being on holidays with the girls, having a full week and a half, just us, being a family, having nowhere to be, nothing to do. Flashing strangers. Flashing surfers, just living my free and most unfiltered life. Best life. Yeah, I had so much fun. And we were down at the house in Ulladulla for the whole time.

When we came back up, Keisha asked the question, but what do you do down there? And the answer is nothing. We did absolutely nothing and it was amazing. It was so nice and, like, the kids just have so much fun and they can be filthy kids down there. They don't brush their hair. They just run around, be like.

Ferals. Just be kids and be outside and it's so good. Do you think you kind of sucked in that one because you know it's probably the last like proper week you'll have before baby number three comes well this baby is due like just before school holidays that the next school holidays so that we will never have another school holidays without three kids i mean there's a lot of things you could say that on like we'll never do this again without three kids but that's good timing is it though oh is it no maybe it's not well i mean i would have like it would have been nice if it was earlier

and then i could have gotten more time off work and the holidays but now i'm just compensating my holidays as maternity leave yeah well my suck is my suck my sweet are the same thing in a way my suck so I went up to the Gold Coast to spend a week with Sherry and Jay as I said before what I didn't say was poor Maya so she's 10 and a half months now and she was just spent like three days back in the hospital she's so sick and a lot of you guys might remember when she was probably only like four months old she was in the ICU and like nearly died basically over in Scotland she got really bad RSV and and it was a really crazy time it was really scary and so because of that it makes her more prone not more prone to picking things up but when she picks something up it's

way worse so she's got like all this scarring on her lungs anyway she got three viruses simultaneously which the hospital was like we haven't seen this in a baby like three separate viruses and she was so unwell so the suck was that you know we spent the week working around her and that she was so unwell this week was I got to spend a week there still so even though she was so sick I'm just obsessed with her and a little bubble yeah so we just spent a lot of the holiday wasn't what we thought it would be which is that's what kids are you know like that's what happens so we just spent the week basically at home and watching her and there were a few nights that Sherry and Jay weren't there I was just sat there myself because they were in the hospital with her and so it was a it

It was a good week and a bad week at the same time. She's out of hospital now. She's on the mend and she's back smiling and happy. But, man, it's stressful. And she's not even my kid. Also, though, I mean it's a good time to kind of do a warning for any parents with little kids out there. And I know that she didn't have RSV this time,

but RSV is absolutely rife at the moment, like so, so rife. My obstetrician was saying that it's like the highest levels of RSV that they've ever had, that the hospitals and pediatric wards are filled with kids and babies that have RSV. So if you, I mean, look, we're not a health podcast. We shouldn't be recommending stuff. But in terms of vaccinations and everything, if that's something that you're inclined to do,

like especially if you're pregnant, you can go and get an RSV vaccine. It could be the thing that stops your kid from having as severe reaction as what they can do if they're not. No, and we're not a health podcast, but I would still happily say go and get the RSV vaccine. So the reason Maya was in the ICU and so sick is because Sheridan was due and booked in to get her RSV vaccine on the day that she went into labour. So Sherry went into labour five weeks early.

So she was going to get the vaccine, which would have transferred to the baby, and that gives them the immunity they need, not to not get it, but to not be in ICU with it. And so Sherry went into labour that day, so she didn't get to get it. She birthed Maya in like two hours, and that is why Maya was so sick. So I 100% will be the person that says that would have gone a different way. You know, the ICU doctors have said for sure she wouldn't have been in the ICU if you were able to get it.

So, yeah, 100%, like, if you can go and get it, get it. And I'm sorry that such an exciting time was, like, you know. Oh, God, I didn't care. Such an exciting time was, like, laced by a really challenging family time as well. No, that doesn't bother me at all. Like, it doesn't take away from, you know, myself. I guess it's, you know, you're a parent, but I'm not a parent,

but nothing else matters when you have, like, a child that is unwell like that. So it's like it doesn't matter, but it was the reality of the break. Yeah. Well, guys, that is it from us for this week. Actually, it's a lie. We'll be back with, you know, an episode on Friday and also an episode on Saturday as we do every week.

Just the end of us for today. If you loved the episode, go and leave a review. You can listen on Spotify, leave a review there, or you can jump on Apple Podcasts. Also, all the episodes are up on YouTube. Go watch us in the flesh if you want to see us in a more 3D format. It's so much more interactive. It really is.

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