Life Uncut - Joanne McNally - The art of riding a lover to sleep

Episode Date: April 24, 2023

Hey Lifers! First up today, it's Laura's weekend from hell, and to top it all off she's been deeply offended by her own offspring.  We then asked you what's the most awkward thing you've said during sex and it turns out we all need a class in 'sexy-talk'. Then we are joined by the hilarious Joanne McNally! Joanne is an Irish stand up comedian and the host of podcast juggernaut 'My Therapist Ghosted me.' In this episode we have a very unfiltered chat (Joanne wouldn't have it any other way) about what led her to comedy, being adopted, her non-existent pelvic floor and wild dating past. We also take a bit of a deep dive behind the scenes of how our personal lives shifted after starting podcasts and everything becoming public content. If you'd like to check out Joanne's touring schedule, see more here! https://www.joannemcnally.com/ Are you a Lifer? Join us!  Follow us on Instagram  Join the Facebook group Follow us on TiktokAnd tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because we love love! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands were never ceded. We pay our respects to their elders past and present. Always was, always will be Aboriginal land. This episode was recorded on Darug Wollongong land. Really fucking bad weekend. hi guys and welcome back to another episode of life uncut i'm laura oh fuck off and that's a wrap on life uncut today i'm britney it's tuesday is it you don't know what day it is you know what it's monday but we're here this morning monday morning bright nearly

we're trying to start the podcast and you know when you get so tired that you're going to a delirium that's where you're at no i'm not tired i'm not tired i slept for 13 hours last night i'm not tired the joy has left my body there is no joy left there is no soul left I'm just a shell of a human I'm just moving through life now you know you are you're a dementor yeah I'm a dementor but I'm wearing lots of colors do you feel like you're wearing colors because you need to make up from your lack of anything inside I'm dead inside yeah you're dead inside so you're like I'm gonna wear the brightest thing I've got you're wearing like a floral dress I walked in and I was like what are you wearing I don't even know I don't even know who I am it looks really nice

but also shut up does not it does it's just unusual because it's not really your it's not your normal choice I feel like you feel like you're imagining you're in Hawaii or something don't people say dress the way you want to be addressed I would like to be addressed as though My life is a circus. Your life is a circus. I had the shittest weekend, guys. Talk us through it. The shittest weekend.

Hang on a second. Producer Keisha, Mitch Turi and I sent you and Matt on a lovely date night Friday night, I think. You had an expensive little date night and you're saying you had the shittest weekend. Yeah, but that feels like a million years ago. That could have been last century. That could have happened in 2014.

So what has since happened in the last two days? what did we miss because we left you on a high yes you did you did we went we had a beautiful dinner friday night one would have thought that the weekend was set up for success marley got a urinary tract infection and so then she was sitting at like a 40 degree temperature for like 30 hours it was like an unbreaking 40 degree temperature so saturday i was like you know what and she was listless and she was upset and i was like that's it i've had enough saturday i'm locking you in basement i'm getting a new kid this one is broken excuse me i would like to return my child no saturday afternoon i was like okay this is messed up and we're taking to the hospital so we got to

the hospital i think other parents might relate to this but like your child is on death's doorstep and then you walk in the electronic doors of the hospital and they're like hello ping completely fine as they're like temperature comes down she's completely fine but because we were already there she had done a urinary sample whatever i was like you know what we're just going to wait so we waited we waited the four five hours into the Saturday night we waited I sat there as my child became overtired and then hysterical because she wanted to go to sleep but then she continued to have to piss into a jar so we finally saw a doctor some wee hours of the morning of Saturday and confirmed urinary tract infection was that a pun the wee hours of the

morning wasn't so many missed opportunities keep going anyway so Marley is fine if she wasn't fine I probably would have a very different attitude to today it's like when your computer or something doesn't work and you call up the helpline and they're like have you tried turning it off literally and you're like yes but you haven't why we do it they literally are like why didn't you reset your child why didn't you just hold the off button down for a bit so she is and was fine okay so she's on antibiotics anyway we wake up on sunday and sunday i was like you know what matt yesterday was a bit of a crappy day let's get the kids ready and we'll go down to the entertainment quarter the entertainment quarter in sydney there's kind of like still an easter show happening there so i

like go we'll take him to the easter show we'll have a cute little family day out cute day little cute day because everyone loves a cute day especially after a not cute day had a bad night let's have a cute day so we're getting ready and then we hear out of nowhere this god almighty like gut-wrenching blood-curdling scream from marley and we will run out to see what's happened she's climbed up well she hasn't really climbed but she's pulled from the cupboard so in the cupboard is everything it's we've got this one trend your entire life it's like you open the door and it tumbles out on you so i'm not surprised we've got this trash cupboard where everything goes and in that trash cupboard goes our microphones and like so we record at home they're like these really

heavy based also in your trash cupboard goes our entire work existence yeah everything that we need for work everything that we need for work is trash is the trash yes you haven't put me in there Brittany was also in the cupboard of trash. I fell on Marley. So we have these mics in there and they have like really, really heavy bases, right? Anyway, Marley pulled something which the heavy mic base and stand was on top of.

It fell 1.5 metres out of the cupboard and just landed straight into her toes and it cut. I feel like it would be four or five kilos altogether. It's like a good five kilos pulling from 1.5. We're still talking about me, right? Yeah, a good five kilos. yeah so yeah way flack if ever so my big toe doesn't weigh that so poor fucking poor kid's toes like hanging off was it hanging off not that bad but it was pretty bad and it bleed so bad yeah

it was bleeding i thought she'd broken it anyway she is screaming the house down like screaming so then we bundle her back up put her back in the car go back to the hospital i walked in they're like oh you're back again something else something different hi then we waited for the six hours anyway she is fine foot is not broken she's got her foot bandaged up but I love the drama in my child in my three-year-old she refuses to walk now because she can walk she knows how to play and it's okay but she will not walk anywhere so we spent the whole of Sunday at the hospital and then because it was a really high intensity high stress situation and we kind of been running on that high stress since Saturday night I picked some fights with Matt and now Matt and I are

fighting and you know what it's just yeah that's where we're at what are you a math fighting about oh he thinks that i bark orders at him when i'm stressed which i do it's very warranted fair but he moves so fucking slowly in the midst of a crisis so she's screaming and we need to get a dress to get to the hospital he wanders over gets a pair of tight elastic undies and tight elastic pants and i was like how do you think we're going to get that over her foot get a skirt i felt like i had to spoon feed you were frustrated because also it's high stress so you're trying to move quickly you're trying to hurry up and you're like kiddo use your brain and i'm like put a dress on her and then he thinks i'm barking orders because i am barking orders and now we're both

so stubborn that neither of us want to cave and apologize how long has the argument been going on i really need the details here because you can't cave you cannot cave yeah he has to cave 24 hours 24 hours okay you can let that go let it ride yeah i've got another day out he will cave he will even though he's done nothing wrong he will eventually apologize just he has to yeah because you're always right you're you know you're in a heterosexual couple the woman's always right doesn't matter what happens so this is very unhealthy unhealthy advice very unhealthy behavior but you know what there is no joy left in my body as i said earlier so i'm gonna i'm gonna ride this argument into the sunset let's be real like the right thing to say right now i'm

gonna give you two angles here to go with the right thing to say is you know life is short be your adults communicate both of you just say what you were feeling and where you went wrong and say sorry but that's not fucking fun right now and you're both very stubborn yeah he also is but at the end of the day he needs to come and meet you halfway he needs to come no three quarters of the way you go a quarter and he goes three quarters he's i mean he has he can't go the whole way no he needs to go the whole way this time really nah do you know what they say they say pick your battles and we haven't had a battle in a really long time like we have not fought in six months you know what's gonna happen though what was that thinking noise

six months that was her laura doing the calculations in her head because she's like an old school computer we honestly calculate out loud we haven't had a fight in six months so this is me technically picking my battle it's just not a good one but you know the worst part about this that you've decided to have a fight and i don't know how you're gonna feel about this but you're gonna have to do the makeup sex are you ready for that because that's only once every four months no we had sex on thursday oh are you ready for it again this soon yeah because if you make up tomorrow you're gonna have to do it maybe I'll just keep fighting with him until next Thursday oh I reckon that's probably solid anyway well an eventful weekend for you mine was far less

eventful I have absolutely nothing to attribute to that Delilah and I are very healthy and happy thanks for asking um can I tell you one more story from the weekend please please do there's so much that's been happening so on Friday night before we went out for this lovely dinner I had a shower with Marley because I had been training guys I'm training for something very important i was extremely sweaty needed to have a shower before we went out for dinner and i thought did you i'll get the kids did you just do that thing where you're like bread crumbing bread crumbing you're like really something really exciting something guys can't wait to tell you about it working really hard on it yeah i'm gonna tell you now you can't do that hey guys i have

this really exciting project that i want to tell you about but i can't just yet so i've been working so hard on it and i can't wait to you guys find out but it won't be yet but in 2024 watch this exactly you can't do that i watched this space guys was training hard for something that i'm not going to tell you are you doing an ultra marathon lol okay no you are that I can't even believe that came out my mouth you are absolutely not doing an ultra marathon could you imagine me running yes that's why I laughed I don't even run when my children's had an accident to get to the hospital we all move very slowly when I see you in bike pants sometimes it's shocking it takes my breath away we talked about this it's because I get cut in the middle but it's shocking okay but

it's only because you don't do it you look amazing in them but I'm like it's just weird it's like it kind of implies that I'm exercising which we all know I don't do oh do you now well oh my god what are you doing you're a ninja warrior that's not the story okay keisha can you imagine laura ninja warrior sorry i shouldn't laugh so hard the fact that you find this so funny is actually deeply deeply offensive but this is okay keep going ninja laura let me tell you what happened so i was training for ninja warrior for six hours when i was on the hoops i got home and i was very sweaty and i wanted to get the kids showered and bathed or showered because we don't have a bath before Well, Keisha came over to mind them, just ready for bed.

But I was on a time limit. So I was like, I'll have a shower with Marley. I have not had a shower with my own child for years. I don't know why I've done that. What is this outward thinking noise that you're making? It's been like a couple of months. Okay. This was the first time I've showered with Marley in a year.

Since we've been in our new house. But Marley has been showering. she showers but on her own but not with me not me naked next to her yeah okay so anyway i had a shower with her she's you know kids are inquisitive they kind of look you up and down when you're nude next to them they're like you know things are very different on you than what they are on me you know that they're sizing you up right but she didn't ask me anything i just saw her sizing me up and i was like oh whatever that's a conversation for another day friday night at the pub yep they all have a look no one says anything no one says anything so then matt gets her out of the shower

I'm like right next to her bedroom so I can hear the conversation that they're having and she says to Matt daddy do you have hair and Matt goes yeah of course and he shows his chest and his face and he's like yeah I have hair she was like oh and mummy has hair and Matt was like yeah mummy has hair because adults have hair you know when we're grown-ups we get hair and she goes right you can see her little face like little brain clicking over going and and she goes when I'm an adult will I have hair and Matt's like yeah Marley when you were a grown-up like mummy you're gonna have hair too and her face lights up like she's so excited she's so happy and she goes when I'm an adult I'm gonna have a big hairy vagina like mummy

yes and like maybe not as many britney as well maybe not as big as mine but yes and and yeah she's a bald eagle alopecia from the eyeballs down thanks joanne that's coming in this episode that's fine i looked at it but what it means is maybe you take a chainsaw to it trim it down i have not looked at my vagina in a long time like i know everyone says look at your vagina in the mirror it always changes dear god it's changed you have to tuck it back up no it's just gotten bigger it is bigger than it used to be is in like the puffiness of the actual lips or the hair is bigger no the hairs i mean the hairs is ragged as always it's like a racket what's just a hack job i just shave what i can see no it's just like gravity is taking a hold and i'm dealing

with it's going sour oh yeah i'm dealing with a vagina that's birthed two children now and i just I've never really acknowledged it or looked or cared. Like nor should you. Thanks. Thanks, friend. But maintenance is probably okay. Like a little trim trim. What?

Like do you know what I need? I need that M face that you did to your face but I'll put it on my vagina. Just zap it back into shape. So I did that M face, guys, which is like a – they call it a non-surgical facelift. It's like this thing that goes on your face and it electrocutes your muscles. Not electrocutes them but it makes them like work out. You can get it for your body. So maybe you can do it for the badge.

maybe you can do a little tighten no it's fine just give it a trim and it'll probably look better no it's trimmed it's not that it's like i swept my courtyard yesterday like i cleaned my back garden it instantly looked better so if you give a little trim it'll improve it is this a metaphor that you did a tidy downstairs you trimmed your courtyard no i'm just trying to relate my my real life garden to your physical garden i tidied the branches yesterday because i'm old and boring I tidied the branches and I swept and it immediately looked better I think if you did the same love and care as I do to my garden to your garden then maybe it'll look better too I can't tell if we're talking about a metaphorical garden I really did my garden

it's not metaphorical my bush is still wild but my back garden physically looks great I think it's because for so long I have always said oh nothing changed after kids it's exactly the same and matt's always like oh yes no that's like never it's never i never actually thought it's changed and then i realized it's because i've never really looked down there but you know it's different it's changed oh thank you for letting us know after two children all right we'll give it a little trim up and see what happens maybe then your man will make up i just like to have sex in the dark he'll never know do you still do sex in the dark how do you feel about sex we don't do sex in the total dark we do sex with like a side lamp on so it's like dimly lit

and then you then it's sometimes still if you've got like a really bright what globe you still sometimes have to put like a t-shirt over the light because sometimes it's too bright no no i just like a dimly lit room it's just better for everyone how confronting is sex in the bright light daylight when you first start seeing someone i think it's really confronting because you can see breakfast you can see everything some people like it some people like having sex with like broad daylight with like a spotlight oh yeah i mean i don't care now ben wouldn't care ben to probably put huge spotlights on and then do it doesn't matter but at the start when you when you just start seeing someone and they want it to be bright light or you can think about the whole time

he's like oh my god they can see every single thing yeah matt wouldn't care either i mean matt wouldn't care he's just happy to get it matt is not trying to dictate like the settings of which we have sex he's just happy for whenever it happens oh yeah you take what you can get for sure all right we'll invent for weekend for you i love that sorry that nothing happened in your life wow that sounded like a dig i don't know if you heard laura but i cleaned my garden so i had a very big weekend no my family came to visit but it was i had an uneventful weekend because i had a very family wholesome weekend i had my nana staying with me and i had my dad i had my mom my uncle my uncle's partner i was like my other aunt it was just a big wholesome family event and

it was like it was exhausting no visits to the hospital constantly putting my nana in ubers because she stayed at a hotel up the road but she doesn't know how to get ubers and she doesn't have them so i'm constantly it was like fucking everything was like a mission impossible trying to order ubers and quickly tell her on the phone where the uber is and what it looks like and how to get in it and she'd get confused and she wouldn't get in then she'd try and climb in the front seat you know how they push the front seats right forward so you've got more room in the back and she's trying to clever so she climbed into the front seat then she had to go with him for putting his seat too far forward and he's like sorry ma'am usually people sit in the back she's

like not me she was like crawl up like a crab in the front seat and i was like no no people get in the back of uber she's like well i want to sit in the front that was my weekend it sounds like taking care of children no they're the best but it was like my weekend was very different to yours well today's episode we have joanne mcnally on irish comedian absolutely fucking hilarious she is so funny we got the pleasure of going to her comedy show she was here doing a tour it's got the prosecco express laura unfortunately couldn't make it but no do you know why i couldn't make it because i was training ninja warrior for my marathon i was training really hard guys so Joanne McNally has a podcast that she does with Vogue Williams who is also over in the UK

it's called My Therapist Ghosted Me we all are fans of it we think it's brilliant and then when we heard Joanne was coming we absolutely knew a that we had to see her and b we had to try everything in our power to get her on the podcast we managed to do both so this episode is absolutely brilliant today but we did go to her comedy show so producer Keisha myself and one of my other friends went to the show and it was just as funny as we could have hoped we just wet ourselves the whole night so she told this story about just like an awkward sex encounter that she had where he was trying to sext her in the bedroom like not sex sex he was sending a text message yeah in the bedroom he was just sexy talking her and she didn't know how to respond dirty talk why are you calling it

sexy talk sexy talk because it's sexy talk it's like she was trying to he was trying to sexy talk her and she didn't know how she didn't know how to sexy talk back this is so confusing and it made me think we did that segment a while ago on what are the weirdest funniest most awkward comments that someone has said to you during sex because there's always these funny one-liners right and it was brilliant the things that you guys were writing into us were brilliant and it sort of made Keisha and I rethink that we should revisit this because we were in hysterics thinking about it so this is mostly what is the most awkward thing you've said during dirty talk sexy time sexy talk hey what's the most awkward sexy talk you've ever done that is the most awkward yeah

what's the most awkward thing you've done and it made me think back to i'm lucky that i've never been awkward in terms of the sexy sexy talk but one thing i did do what you're good at dirty talk you're saying please can we call it dirty talk it's so weird calling it sexy talk i prefer sexy it makes me think that maybe you're quite bad at it if you keep calling it sexy talk i'm calling to sexy talk stop looking at me I can probably pretty awkward at sexy talk I don't love it I'm better via text I'm better with my dialogue when it's written down oh yeah I do my best work by text message but I can in the moment roll with it but also sometimes you say something like if you were in doggy or something you said something when they can't see you cringing because you're like I

can't believe I just said that but that's what it made me think about we're gonna get into your guys responses in a second because we have some really funny ones but one of the responses on the Instagram call out producer Keisha showed me this morning was my sister and Sherry wrote on it ask Brit to tell you about turn me over and I was like for a second I was like what this is this is my sister then it hit me my sister and I went on a cruise once which is funny in itself you have been holding on to a dirty talk sex story it's for years I just well it's not me it's my sister it happened to her okay so picture this we're on a cruise and I don't know why we're on a cruise we're just cruising around it wasn't even

far I don't think we're that far off the coast of Australia so the whole thing is funny this is full of 90 year olds and the two of you I think we're on there with my nana I think my nana is on a cruise she was still trying to get in the front of an uber so we're on the cruise and Sheridan's hooking up with this guy she met this guy at the bar he seemed great seemed cute and Sheridan was like I might just have a fling now she was quite young so she'd never had a fling she must have been 22 and i was 25 so she comes home later that night she's giving him a blowjob and he goes want me to turn over want me to turn over she goes what you know she's still going hell for leather she goes i didn't think i heard it right and so she's sexually trying to be like

sorry what like and he goes want me to turn over she goes i don't understand and he goes do you want me to roll over and sheridan didn't understand she's like does he want me to lick his arsehole i don't know what he wants me to do so she just pretended he didn't do anything and just kept doing the windmill blowjob maneuver and that was it that got up walked away she's like i don't know what to do so she left i don't think they even had sex then she goes to me did he want me to lick his arsehole i don't know why does someone say do you want to turn over in a blowjob is it to lick the butthole yeah he wanted a rim job give me the front back and sides and that was the only thing she said she's like it was so sexy until he

said you want me to lick my butthole and then she just so she just pretended that she was completely deaf and couldn't hear anything and then you know that awkwardness when someone's asked a question and you don't answer and you don't answer but then you've got to keep going pretend like you didn't hear yeah she just pretended and she does have hearing aids now so maybe she didn't hear right but okay if somebody asks you to give it no if they said lick my arsehole during sex no is there a limit the arsehole but it's different like but heaps of people are into that he's into that but it's different when it's your partner not this guy that she met on the cruise ship i don't think you ask someone you don't know to give you a rim drop you don't

do it right surely it's like a three-day deep isn't it i need to know you for at least three days before i lick your arsehole i used to date a guy who was really into dirty talk like really into it and it used to make me so awkward that he would tell me what to say and i would just repeat him like you're like a parrot i really like dirty talk i like it said to me but i don't want to participate back so you can call me you know you can call me a little bitch whatever you want to but don't expect me to say he was he was like suck my dick you were like suck my dick you just repeated him tickle my balls tickle my balls all right let's read some of your responses what is the most awkward thing you have said

during sex okay i responded to who's your daddy with my father's entire name terrence burn anthony bryce hockley just so you know we aren't exclusive i told him that while he was inside me fuck me like a demon this girl said you can raw dog it if you like some guy might find that sexy oh that's so hot for a guy no guy wants to wear a condom yeah but who's yeah you can raw dog it if you like it's just a bit bogan isn't it i like it as rough as sandpaper that's not sexy i like it as a rough as sandpaper no i didn't say anything but a guy was going down on me He looked up and I waved at him.

Hey, how's the weather down there? I waved. Imagine being so startled and not knowing what to do. You're just like. Oh, because that's the thing. Do you maintain eye contact when someone's going down on you? Sometimes. What do you do?

Oh, every so often you've got to look down. But it just becomes a bit much when they're down there. I was just picturing it. Yeah, and you're like. hi hi and you're like a little bit to the left just to the right going down there how's the weather oh shit oh i once went beep beep beep when a guy had finished in me and was pulling it out like a truck backing up sound why that's not even dirty but it's also not reversing i don't know what happened there i think she blacked out shoot them in i said it to my partner as he was about to

come the sperm also very bogan man i really had to work for that one that's tough though sometimes it's tough sometimes it's like really really long time hard work muscles aching sweating i want to fuck you till the cows come home why are you talking about farmyard animals but no you can talk about farmyard animals you can ride me like a horse baby that's better than fuck me to the cows okay fair maybe a horse ride a cow a big fat cow that doesn't move it's blinky eyelashes they are beautiful cows are so pretty so pretty if someone called me a cow if someone called me a cow in the bedroom i'd be like that's a compliment no you would not you absolutely would not cows are so pretty actually

that probably sees some weird way because you've got so many red flags and you're into toxicness you'd probably be into them yeah i'll take anything i'll take anything yeah you're like i will take it i assume you're talking about my eyelashes i told a guy i said block your nose i was about to queef but i meant to say block your ears so he thought she farted do you know what i love about this sex can be and has been so awkward for so many of us and if we don't laugh you cry so it just makes you feel better that we're all kind of bad at it Do you know what it really does reiterate is that we don't have enough practice with sexy dirty talk.

We don't. And you know what we shouldn't be doing? We shouldn't be learning about algebra in school. People should teach us how to – actually, no, that's very illegal. Let's not teach kids how to dirty talk. But, like, this last one – like, no, we do need to teach people how to dirty talk. Teenagers, let's teach the teenagers.

Someone think of the teenagers. Okay, I'm going to get you to finish this sentence. Great. Because this – Can you stare into my eyes while you do it? This girl doesn't know how to do it, ready? Stare into my eyes. Dirty talk to me, Brit.

This girl said, I'm as wet as the ocean. She said seaworld. I'm as wet as seaworld. All right, let's get into the chat with Joanne. I'm super excited about today's guest and she's here in the flesh. Now, this has been someone on the hit list for a while. I've actually slid into your DMs, but you ignored me. We had to go through your PRs.

Joanne McNally is in-house. She's an Irish comedian, writer, and podcast host. She is here on a comedy tour, the Prosecco Express. I'm going to your show in person tonight. Joanne McNally, welcome to Life Uncut. Can I clap myself? Yeah. I saw your DM.

I was like, no, let that bitch go through the publicist. Did you? No, I'm trying to make it seem. I was like, ballsy, bold, yeah. No, no, those DMs get a little bit chaotic. I also I was gonna say I heard but I know because I listened to your podcast my therapist ghosted me but I know you don't actually like to do podcasts I don't I know so why this one then because new territory new attitude yeah I like that new you knew me new near new me new country knew me I

don't I do you know what it is I find at the moment with the tour and my own podcast like I have a tiny physically quite a large head but mentally quite a small head I don't have a lot of room for stuff and then you're the other when you're doing other podcasts it's just you know what I mean you can end up you're also like I'm not going to give you my content I need it for my own shit that's exactly it like I was saying to Vogue I don't know how I'm going to write a new show while doing the podcast like any interesting thought or anything you know you do it anything anything you almost do embarrassing things so you have stuff to talk about like something terrible goes on in my life and I'm like oh at least I've got something to say

The number of times, so to set up this relationship, Laura's married two kids from The Bachelor. I have been single. Sorry, obviously I know just the background real quick. Yeah. But I can't. Yeah, sometimes I think it's shocking as well. No, that it actually worked. That it worked.

Yeah. You were a contestant on The Bachelor and he was The Bachelor. Yeah. And you're married. That blows my mind. In Australia, it's a 50% success rate. What? No one watches it anymore because it's so wholesome.

like that's the problem well it's my first item yeah everyone's kind of given up on the bachelor but that's how we met i feel like it's it's like such an old story to anyone who actually listens and is from australia but to anyone who's new or from overseas is like fucking tell me more fascinating you know why the uk doesn't have the bachelor like canada america australia uk doesn't have why was he i know this isn't but i just want to know why was he honest is he famous no no no he'd just come back from living in europe gone through a bad breakup and then he saw an ad which was for like are you looking for love so he was a contestant on the season before and he got dumped and then he became the bachelor because he was kind of like australia's sweetheart who was

heartbroken and so i got someone sloppy second basically someone else's trash is another person so why when i got dumped why didn't i get the sympathetic bachelor at the year after i got dumped on the back i was on a different season what's going on joanne how are there enough women in ireland or in australia to fill these dating programs look we've gone off track let's go back to the start we start every episode with an accidentally unfiltered and embarrassing story and why do i feel like you have a million to choose from um abc we'll go c okay so i do the podcast i do with vogue i've told the story before but the podcast i do i do a podcast with vogue williams and vogue is like femininity personified like just very together everything's like color

coordinator she files her knickers what her housekeeper does shit like that she's perfect she is perfection and she looks like Cindy Crawford

and she's three kids and not a single stitch very proud of that and like when we get drunk together I'm like I can't watch your birth videos again Vogue

and she'll be showing me the birth videos and the child just like slips out like share like it's coming out through the ground like you know when something comes out

through the ground of a they come out fully clothed teeth and everything like with toys with their Swarovski yeah yeah yeah their Gucci tracksuits

and stuff but em so that was kind of The basis of the podcast Because I was the opposite of that But anyway Vogue Like what we were saying earlier

About trying to get content For the pod Vogue was like Come in come in Because she was having Some postnatal She wasn't actually Having a postnatal issue

But she was doing some Vogue would collab With fucking hand grenades Like she's big for the collabs So she was like I'm doing a collab With a Kegel chair And I was like

A what? She's like a Kegel chair And I thought it was Some like ring light thing But it's not It's for You know if you've got kids How's your pelvic floor?

Oh look It's not as good as it used to be Box jumps Particularly bad The fact that you're doing box jumps Means you're at a certain stage With your pelvic floor Well I don't anymore

For that reason Yeah yeah yeah I've used a Kegel chair Have you? Yeah just for fun Yeah I wanted to try that I'd say if you turned it on right

You could get great crack out of it It is supposed to also Help with your orgasms Well Now I didn't come on the chair Thank god That would be really embarrassing But anyway so

Folks I come in I'm doing this collab With this Kegel chair And it just kind of buzzes Your vagina back After you've had a kid basically Because your pelvic floor Kind of collapses or whatever

And I didn't even know Like I'm not aware I have no kids Anyway, I went in. Firstly, I shaved, waxed, and came in like with alopecia from the eyebrows down because I assumed that we were getting buzzed like internally. Focus, like come and sit on the vag chair because it'll be good for the podcast. What did you think?

You sounded like a pogo stick. Yeah, I thought it would be like a cattle prod and put it in you and like buzz you back. So this is what I did. We went to Bali and I had that done internally in Bali on a holiday. I went to a day spa. I kind of enjoyed it. But anyway, I understand why you thought that. You're getting your labia

Gently massaged By an electrical prod What's not to like It was relaxing I can't I have a very I don't know what you say Low level or high level

Of eroticism Like I I can't even Getting a head massage In the hairdresser Embarrasses me Do you know when they go real slow And you're like

This is I don't need this You get turned on No it just makes me Really embarrassed I'm like how do you not Think this is erotic I go to the hairdresser

To get that head massage No it's so embarrassing Okay You're some 14 year old girl Massaging her head You're like oh my god keep going with your

Kegels tip so anyway I go in and like I say I waxed and everything I was prepared to have I thought I'd be in a gown but anyway

go in and Vogue's sitting there head to toe in white on this chair she looks like Mariah Carey like there's like a wind machine at the back of her hair and she's just sitting there

going and I was like oh you're fully clothed so it was totally different to what I thought it was so it was just sitting like a chair like this but it's a huge oak

and it like buzzes anyway Vogue's like while I'm getting buzzed you do the pelvic floor test so I sat Maria was the she's a postnatal physiotherapist she's like sitting the thing so sat in the thing and so it gauges your pelvic floor like a heartbeat so like you clench and it like goes up and down and up and down so I was on the seat thing she was like and clench and so I

was clenching and she's like I said clench and I was like yeah clenching and she you could see her like flatlined completely flatlined no response at all so then she was like seeing was the thing plugged in she was like oh wow basically you've no pelvic floor and she said to me when did you give birth when did you give birth and I went I've never given birth I said my vagina is very much at the taking phase she hasn't pushed anything out and she's like you so then I I'm now a patient in a postnatal physiotherapist clinic and Vogue bounced out perfect after three kids she never went back they were like there's an issue here turns out I'm misaligned and my pelvis is on the ground or my uterus is up my eyeballs I don't know anyway then I had I had

to have a postnatal physiotherapist. I've never had a fucking child. The original story I was going to say was because I used to wet myself loads when I laughed as a child, but I think it's all connected. A hundred percent it's connected. Yes, absolutely. You're having some sort of like uterus prolapse. You didn't even know.

You're like, what is that bulge? I'm not even going to have a prolapse. I never lapsed. I just lapsed. How does that translate in the bedroom, like sex-wise? Do you have those moments where they're like, I'm coming, and you're like, what, it's in? No.

It touches the wall still, Brie. It's gone. Well, I don't know. she flatlined on the kegel chair it'd be more that they'd be like is it in not me

I'd be like I can feel that yeah that's good they're like I don't know they're like they want to put those you know in a bowling alley

when you're shit at bowling they put those inflatable things up the sides they were like do you have any of them for your insides because I can't fucking feel a thing here

it's not about size it's about grip so anyway so now I have to do and then I spoke about it before because obviously I just thought it was funny

and then these women were messaging going so brave to talk about your pelvic issues i was like shit i just thought it was a funny story i didn't realize i've got pelvic issues there's nothing more patronizing than when people tell you how brave you are just for like showing up in like for being you showing up in the world existing and people like you're so brave wearing that you're so brave you're like i'm just wearing a fucking bikini at the beach babe that fringe is brave you know when you turn out with no makeup on that's what gets me when you decide to go i'm gonna get makeup free i'm feeling myself and

people like so brave pray for you and you're like oh like yeah like iconic it just kind of doesn't mean anything anymore Joanne you got into comedy late I did what was the instigator like what were you doing prior to doing comedy and what made you want to make that massive life shift nothing nothing made me want to do it it was all very bizarre and very fortunate but luck really so basically what happened was I was a publicist I was working in PR doing youth brands so like Well, actually Vaseline was kind of one of my main brands. Anyway, whatever. They probably won't decide that, but I wasn't very good at my job.

Anyway, and I had like kind of a casual eating disorder for a long time. Just casual, nothing serious. Like I would have been, my entire self-worth was in my weight and it was up and down and in and out. And I would go through phases of like eating gherkins, you know, and then like drop loads of weight, all that shit. I feel like we all lived through that era where like heroin chic was just, I mean, that was what was modelled for us.

like the Kate Moss look. How do you survive that? You don't. You need to be very strong-willed to look at all that and go, no, no, no, I'm my own thing. I don't have, I'm not that strong-willed. But I think so many women went through that period of their 20s or their teens where they were like obsessed with what they put

in their bodies in terms of food. So this, when you were working in PR, this was something that like permeated your existence. It was always there because I was kind of a, I would have said, heavyset kid. So I always felt like bigger than the other kids in school. And then that kind of seeded in. I also think that some people are maybe a little bit more predisposed

within others. And I think I was a little bit more predisposed. I think it was always in there. Well, it's something you can control. Exactly. Anyway, so what started as kind of casual turned into like a full time job. And then I just fucking lost my shit completely. And I was bulimic mostly.

So my whole day was just binge purge, binge purge. So I couldn't really function. so I quit my job and my mum brought me back to the house so I was in my mum's house and I was an outpatient in a clinic

which meant I wasn't in full time I would just go in and like do bits and like have a meeting with someone and get weighed and a go

and a friend of mine Una McKevitt now she wasn't really my friend at the time she's actually the older sister one of my best friends she was starting a theatre show

called Singlehood which was about real people i.e. people like me who weren't actors and then comedians who were like actual comics

and we were all just telling stories about our lives relationship wise romance wise because I loved performing as a kid I was always a bit

of a show pony but my family were quite conservative traditional like that wouldn't have been an option like that's something that you know what I mean

no one lawyer, med school exactly nurse like yeah I wanted to be a nurse or a vet something safe

something safe so I always had that kind of performer in me and it never really had a chance to come out and then

Una was like look do you want to be in the show called Singlehood and I nearly bit her hand off I remember where we were we're standing outside the dance town to the electro picnic which is kind of Ireland's very cheap version of Glastonbury and I was like yes yes and I was quite unwell at the time like I was still very unwell and I needed a reason to want to get my life back and all I saw for getting my life back was as sad as it is just getting fat that's all I said like wait fat fat fat wait wait I had no reason to get well do you get me yeah yeah so almost like this idea of you're on the train of

getting healthy but you were like well I'll get healthy but healthy just means I'm gonna be fat and unhappy I was just very sad and I was very unfulfilled and I just had no purpose I'd no direction so I miss I kind of skewed my sense of purpose and direction into weight loss you know what I mean and I didn't know how to get it out of that because I'd no other thing to get better for I didn't see the point of anything if I couldn't just sit in my mum's room getting fucking pinner like that was just all it was about for me so anyway started doing the show and like as wanky as it sounds it like it completely changed everything so then I started doing the show luckily I'd just been broken up with by this bald lad and I was raging about it

also though what a time to be dating if you were like that's the most important thing that's going on in your life is like dealing with having an eating disorder at the time that would have been a really fucking hard time today i always have time for lads sadly and i will tell you the sad truth i had more boyfriends when i looked like a fucking greyhound race dog like i swear to god because like they're as brainwashed as we are 100 not anymore it's different now it has changed yeah this was like the twin no i was gonna say early notice it wasn't it was like well so i did my first I started comedy 2017 2018 so I was still in treatment when I started so that'll tell you when it was so that wasn't that long ago no it's not that long ago we're talking like four or five

years ago yeah but comedy kind of saved me in a way I just hate saying it because it sounds so earnest but it did I don't know what would have happened if that meeting if Una hadn't offered me that part and that bald lad hadn't dumped me wait fuck the bald lad he would be looking at you now To kicking himself Sorry but he No he's absolutely Not kicking himself I don't think

He would you're a babe I don't think anyone Would look at my situation And be like Let that one That's the one that went Do you know I'm the only One of all the girls

That didn't hear from A single ex during lockdown I'm the only one During lockdown Everyone's like Oh my ex is in my DMs I didn't hear from A single one of my exes

No one looks back And is like Oh shit That's the one that got away No I didn't hear From an ex either Did you not No

But I didn't have an ex Oh for fuck's sake Brittany Just catch I'd like 28 of them And none of them got in touch every single one of your exes knows you're going to use it for content they can't they're too scared to go into your dms for fear of what you'll do to them but i don't name in

shame though i would never just tell all the details they're worried i try and get back with them which i would have it was a very bad place so you were always funny where did the funniness come from because it is late to have been like oh fuck i'm funny i could get paid for this so i always liked making people laugh yeah for sure i did and i know that some comics when they look back on their like school days they were quite serious I wasn't really I was kind of the clown really so I like laughing and making people laugh and then so singlehood kind of became a thing and it toured and then this comedian came to see it and he caught in touch after and he was like I think you could do stand-up and then that's how it started but I said no like as if like you know

it's such a mad job yeah it was such a huge pivot going from like PRing Coors Light to like oh yeah I'm going to do stand-up now. It just seemed like it was too much. Anyway, and he was like, look, come on tour with me and you can kind of do five minutes and build it up. And that's what I did. And I built it up. And by the end of that tour, I had like half an hour

and then I got signed and then it just kind of started rolling. Well, you were speaking about your 25,000 exes that you've had. What do you reckon would be your worst date story that you've got? Is there one that's a particular one that stands out? Do you know what? Like everyone gives out about online dating. I fucking loved it. Come on, it's fascinating.

you get to meet these people and they're completely different to what they look like. Yeah, you get catfished constantly. You get catfished, but I catfished everyone. Did you?

Yes! In what capacity? With my personality, not physically because I never wanted to turn up and have them look disappointed. Do you know what I mean? You could easily filter shit

to its depth. You'd put 28 Paris filters on something, but I wanted them to know what I looked like. But of course I catfished. Of course I would. What do you mean

you catfished personality-wise? I haven't heard anyone say that before. You're like, I'm way more normal. Yeah, you'd just be like, oh,

I love Fishing Yeah Baseball Can't get enough of it Like whatever I don't care Whatever got them in the room

And they're still 25 And they're in my basement And I'm like I'm going to win them over Eye to eye But no Like you do And like

I had it as well With these kind of Faux relationships You'll know Obviously you're married You're of no interest to us I mean I dated guys I've not been married

For that long You're old news I've got babies Come on I did the online dating thing Take your mic off But So you met your fella on Raya

Yeah I've only had two boyfriends in like 10 years and they're both on Raya. I'm ashamed to say, but they're both on Raya. Yeah. You met your boyfriend on Raya? I met mine on Raya as well, yeah. Yeah. I wanted to ask you, is he, what's his story?

Is he a secret someone or? No, he's absolutely nobody. Because everyone goes. No, but he's nobody. He's absolutely nobody. Did you hear that, Alan? You're fucking nobody. Alan, block your ears.

No, he's no one. I don't know how he got on. He snuck on like a snail. Now, in fairness, I don't know how I got on at the time either. Did you meet anyone uber famous on Raya? No, I tried to, but sure. It's very hard When you're competing

With like Jennifer Aniston Totally 100% You know what I mean Yeah there's like Victoria's Secret Tom Hines You're like hey Tom

And you've got like Your little photo From your festival From last summer I super like Channing Tatum But he didn't super like me back Shocking Excuse me

I am shocked Do you see the one where Was it Ben Affleck Who was it Contacted your one Oh yeah and they She unmatched him Because she thought

He was a fake Was it Ben Affleck I think it was Ben Affleck Yeah and he DM'd her Then on Instagram And they were like fake And he was like what Like he couldn't get his head around

That she would I mean I guess he's right Because she did think he was a fake Yeah but also Maybe she just wasn't interested in him And so even more embarrassing No she came out She was like I thought

It was really him She put it online And I was like That's so That feels mean Like do you know what I mean Why do you think that feels mean Towards Ben

Because it's like That's a private thing that he did Because he was trying to date I thought it was mean Yeah It's a bit of a low blow I let it show Adam It was embarrassing for him

It was very embarrassing for him getting that a lot zach efron which i don't i'm not about this but zach efron a lot has been getting people come out and normal people and telling the dating stories and the sex stories about him like because he's just been dating normal people he came to australia for a long time and all these people coming out and talking about oh he loves going down it's mean and i'm like why would you do that yeah it's mean because it's their one moment to kind of rub up against a celebrity literally rub up against a celebrity but it's like it is mean but also it's them feeling like they've got a one-up you know but it's like it's so personal you want to think that people aren't

gonna like like that was the whole point is that it's private but people don't see celebrities as real people we see them because we've had this like veneer across them for so long that i think a lot of celebrities don't get treated like they're real people for that reason because they are untouchable and then when people have access to them they kind of are treated in just a less empathetic way because they seem like they're less deserving of empathy i think it's because they Are like I rode this celebrity And this is my like

This is my time to shine Five minutes of Yeah Like I met a guy once Who had sex with A famous woman And he Was telling me like

What she's into and all And I was like This just feels very odd You're kind of betraying her Absolutely Like she trusted you You're having sex It's a very intimate

Private thing And now you're going around Saying that she likes To be slapped in the ass And call everyone daddy Who doesn't? I actually hate it No don't ever call me daddy

Oh no you can No not you Joanne Joanne you've been warned Do not call me daddy Give it an air We'll see how you feel Give it a go babe

Did I tell you about the time Vogue doesn't open her DMs Because she's like Got a million followers So I've got less So I do kind of Open mine occasionally But at the time

This was back This was maybe a year ago When I was kind of More engaged in the DMs This woman was like Hey I run a Spank paddle business So I make

Like bespoke Spank paddles Bespoke I was like Oh my god Let the gifting begin I will swipe up did you get it

she's like I'd love to gift one to Vogue can you ask me what she would like on it options are daddy's little slut I was like

options are daddy's little slut I was like Vogue do you want a daddy's little slut did she get it of course she fucking did swipe up

swipe up did she get you two you got a spare one okay right yeah like daddy's princess I don't know yeah so you met Alan on Raya

yeah how long were you single before that because I heard you talking about something recently you were in this new relationship and your agent was like what the fuck you're not relatable anymore what content

what content are we going to do and i felt that when i finally got a boyfriend i was like holy shit like laura used to put me out to the walls for my dating story yeah go on a date girl that's all you're good for what do we get out of you now no sex in case it ends up in a headline in scotland yeah poor ben my boyfriend he is a soccer player football player in scotland and he's just been in the media it is but for him he wants to be in the media for football and he's in the media a lot at the moment for like what are you doing sexy nothing but they you know they take clickbait yeah yeah i know it's very hard as well when you're doing something like this where you're taught where you're mining your personal life every week like everyone gets taken down yeah

so brit came back from her trip to scotland just recently and she was like we can't talk about my sex life from over there because like i don't want it in the headlines like god damn it what are you good for now but that's what i felt like totally when i was happy and feeling loved because i was unhappy for a long time and that was relatable and i felt like life on cuts listeners aren't gonna like me anymore they're not gonna relate to you anymore yeah did you feel the same no i didn't actually because rick rick is my uk agent and he is like the biggest geezer like he's so funny but i got a butt lift now it was a non-invasive i basically just had my ass massaged for a week this girl got in touch with me she's irish based in the uk and she was like

look i'm doing these butt lifts did you want to come in i was like yeah fuck it go on like And we just chatted And she basically I don't know low level It was a low level molestation So non-surgical No it was just Like an electric thing

That was it Rick rang Rick rang He's like Fucking hell mate You getting a fucking butt lift And I was like What

He thought I was going in For like implants or whatever So he kind of picks up The wrong end of the stick sometimes But when I started going in With Alan Rick was like Are you happy now

Because that would be A shit show Yeah And I was like Happy He was like No Ridiculous

Silly I mean love I'm not happy Yeah no I'll always find problems. Yeah. You think about it, the best content from any performer, from comedians, podcast, Adele, Lewis Capaldi.

Pain. Pain, heartbreak, trauma. Like that is what people want to hear. I reckon I still have plenty of it in my future. Yeah. You've got a trauma bank you can tap into. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not sold.

Also, I think it's really nice like to have breaks in single. I really enjoyed my single life. I guess the really lovely thing about it is when you get to make stories about your dating life it makes dating more fun because you know like you said you'll always get a bit of crack out of it you know what I mean you're like do you think it gives you more confidence to kind of go out there and do things and say things that maybe you wouldn't necessarily do because you know that there's not that there's an ulterior motive but you're like well if this all fails it'll end up on the podcast totally like Nora it was a Nora

Efron she's like everything is copy everything's copy yeah ultimately yeah that's and that's a really nice thing that's really nice thing about comedy the worst things that happen you're like I'll probably get five minutes out of this but how do you then differentiate like when you say everything's content or everything is something that you can turn into how do you differentiate the parts of your life that you're like actually I need to keep that to myself and these parts I'm fine you don't at all so there is no filter with you that's when your mom rings and she's like I can't believe you said that yeah that's when that happens how does Alan your partner feel About that

Is he comfortable with it I think he's okay Like it took Alan a while Well I think The joke is always on me Really Yes So it's never

Like even when he fell asleep Mid-ride Which I spoke about On the podcast It was ultimately Me going like Jesus Do you know what I mean

Like I need to Reconsider my strategy Like this is I rocked him to sleep I was supposed to like I was supposed to like Ride him into a tizzy You're like

Yeah Like burping him As he nodded off Padding a baby Apparently there's a fine line Between sensual and Sending to sleep He needed to get back

To the Kegel chair I know They finished that shit I know I rocked him to sleep Rocked him to sleep Fucking hell I know

But stuff like that But like that's ultimately On me And I think he finds that funny There's certain stuff That I don't talk about Like there is There has to be

There has to be Now we would kind of Do it all on the pod I'm sure you're the same And then we would Cut bits out after but I think you kind of know where the line is the danger is I was listening to I've started listening to Diary of a CEO have you listened to that podcast yeah we do and he had your one on

from call her daddy is it called yeah yeah call daddy Alex and she was talking about the line between when you use your life for a podcast and where the line is and I just thought that was so interesting because she was saying the more outrageous you are the more listeners you get And stuff And then you get Kind of caught In this strange world Where you're just

Performing all the time Even in your private life Because you need to Tell stories in your Public life Yeah yeah yeah So me and Vogue In fairness

We talk about What's going on In the news And stuff like that Not the news I mean the news Sorry the Daily Mail So it's not on us

To be mining our life For an hour every week We record for an hour We usually only do 40 minutes Because you just It's not sustainable Yeah but having said that

From Alex From Koi Daddy If I was being paid 60 million dollars I wouldn't have a line I would be Is that what you got paid Yeah that's her deal

60 mil Yeah I would do anything In my personal life I would rock anyone To sleep for 60 million dollars But she has now Swapped the strategy

Like her pod now Is interviewing people Whereas before it wasn't It was just her Talking for an hour Every week You'd run out of steam Doing that

That's the thing You can't do it Folks like what you do this week I'm like Didn't fucking do anything Yeah Didn't do anything I lay in a bar

And watched back to back Married at first sight And ate dumplings In my room on my own That's what I did We say that all the time We're like what did you do you must have done something and I was like I fucking didn't do anything I didn't

do anything nothing like and when it's about your life being entertaining and you're sitting there being like okay I'm so boring this week and then you've got to think of it's nice to be able to rely on the daily mail that's where it comes from yeah because you need to kind of trigger conversation points for you to discuss and hopefully some crack comes out of that but like it's not an exact science when was it for you that the transition I mean obviously you're still doing stand-up comedy prolifically but when was it that you thought okay I'm gonna move this into a podcast medium why did you start in podcasting well so I put all my eggs into live I had no kind of scripts I had nothing in the pipeline as they say I was just live live live

and I was kind of proud of that I was like I'm a stand-up like old school classic stand-up and then lockdown happened and I was like oh shit because obviously what are you doing now and I'd moved to the UK I was there about Maybe A year before Lockdown Covid happened

So and I felt like I was kind of getting A bit of traction in the UK And then obviously Everything kicked off So I was like Okay what do I do Like

Where do I go From here now Because there was talk At the time No one will ever be In a room together again We'll all be in these Zorb balls

Yeah and allergic to the world For eternity Yeah yeah yeah And I was like Okay So what happens now Do I just go back And train as a nurse

Or do I Yeah Like what do I do Like I hadn't I didn't have any Writing credentials As in I'd written A couple of columns

For newspapers But like it wasn't like I didn't have a book deal I had nothing else Yeah Anyway so Vogue Was kind of in the same boat Now she used to do

A lot of her work online But she was like Look we should do Something together And a podcast Has felt like That's just That's just what people do

Well that's what everybody Did during COVID Yeah Every single person Was like what are you doing Should we do a podcast Yeah So when did yours pop up

So we're two years now Okay She had a podcast With her husband With the production company And we went in and met them And then it just started rolling So we kept it very loose

Because we got It's similar to yours It's just like Two women just chatting Having a chat Yeah Chewing the fat Because you can get very tied down

In formats Like oh my god It needs to be Like every week It's a new missing cat Or some shit And we Do you know when you're like

Locked into And then you're like No no no Just keep it really loose And just see what happens And then No I'm sure it's the same As you guys

You're like This is so much fun This is a great job I'm delighted I've always wanted to Okay tell me who is your therapist who ghosted you I know and what is like where did that come from did you ever hear from them again no so basically I had this therapist before lockdown I was in a breakup what

else what like I was breaking up with this guy and it was kind of on and off and in and out blah blah maybe I would say more so for me than him I just knew it was over but you were just outside of his house every day I was just I was devastated and I needed to move past it so you can't move past anything in lockdown because everything just literally stands still so I was like

okay I need I need to kind of start focusing on myself more and blah blah blah so got this therapist and he was so good I loved him

and then one day he just went away like in the classic ghosting sense maybe he died didn't tell you didn't die he didn't tell you

he didn't die he cancelled your appointments so what happened he was going away for a month I was actually seeing him when I think about it now it was before lockdown

so I had seen him for maybe two months Before lockdown Then lockdown happened And of course Everything kind of went up in the air So then I tried to get back In touch with him

And then I just couldn't get Nothing So then I was genuinely going Oh my god He's like dead He got COVID Yeah Yeah COVID

Yeah 100% He got batted Got bitten by the bat And then I contacted him And he was alive and well And recommending other therapists to me He was like

I'm not for you I emailed him And I was like John Are you still working in mental health Because at this time I just had enough I was like

I just need to know Just tell me Just tell me what I did Let me sleep at night Yeah It was horrible He was so good I made so much progress

With him In even those two months And then he just Took it away I'll pay you double John Was he still Seeing patients And just didn't want to see you

To be honest Or had he changed careers No he hadn't changed career I said John Are you still working A mental health Like I You know when you're just

Like worked up into a tizzy I was like I just need to fucking know All caps And then you wonder Why you didn't get a reply Yeah outside of John, are you still working on my love?

And he just wrote back, yes, I am, Joanne, and here's who I'd recommend for you. And that was it. But he never told you why. I don't think I've ever heard of that happening. I am. Like that is a world first. No, it's not.

I have had people contact me and say the same. Actually, one. I'd won one contact. Loads of people have been there. They were loads. A lot of people asking about, you know, people in their outfits. No, a lot of people asking about how my therapist gets me.

A lot of people asking Now one other woman Said the same thing Happened to her Yeah I don't know What happened to him And he was really Like he was kind of

All like you know Wax on wax off He was very He was bordering On spiritual Which I really enjoyed Because I wouldn't be That way inclined at all

Myself I enjoyed There was a lot of Incense burning and shit What was it so much About his approach That you thought Cut through more than

Other therapists Say that you've been to see He just got it Right I don't think he did He did I think that's why he left you Maybe he got it

Maybe that's why Maybe he got it too much He's like this is a fucking lot more He's like I don't have the capacity For this on the end He's like I am done Wishing you love and light Good luck

I mean you and Vogue I feel like you're similar To Laura and myself In terms of Vogue's got A hundred thousand kids Vogue's got more kids Than umbilical cords How many kids?

No three Three But they're close They're like she slid them out She slid them all out yeah They were like stacked on top Of each other I always thought I'd have like

20 kids And then you hung out With Vogue Well no I think it was My circumstances Kind of Vogue wouldn't put me off

Having kids At all She makes it look so easy Actually Now I do find it stressful When they're all there At the same time Like I've said that to her

It's like a circus I'm like Vogue Can I still speak to you On your own One child at a time Please line up Orderly fashion They're like

Like they always want something Yeah Yeah they do All the time Because then you want to Do you find that difficult To navigate being in a completely different stage of life in terms of friendships business recording the

podcast no i had kind of thought i wasn't gonna have kids i was like nah i just don't think it's for me i've no like i don't know if you have i don't have like a burning desire to have kids exactly the same what age are you 36 in a couple months okay so yes you have to you're kind of at the stage where you kind of have to start making some decisions i froze eggs okay because i was so on the fence that i was like i would hate for the time to come and i changed my mind and really want them and I don't have the option but I have recently and I'm 36 I've never not wanted kids but I've been on the fence I'm like I don't think I do but I'm not sure I don't want to rule it out and then just recently literally in the last couple of months something has switched because

you're in love I'm thinking about it every day every day I wake up and I'm like should I do it is today the day is next week do I need to freeze an embryo do I need like I think about it all the time and now i've transitioned to maybe i don't know if i can imagine my life without one yeah something shifts as well when you're in a healthy stable oh my fuck no i'm not even healthy stable relationship i was like it ain't that bad most toxic one i'm like come to mommy i will procreate with you when you are with someone and you want to be with them and you want to secure that relationship secure it when you want to lock them down yeah but there is sometimes something that kind of flicks in you where you're like you start thinking more about kids it's age but also i'm a

demon for like I've had a couple of relationships my I remember the one of my first boyfriends who I went out with from say it was like 19 to 21 kind of thing and to say like I talk about in the I don't talk about him in the show but like I don't fall in love I fall insane so it's like she does that Laura does I have in the past I'm in yeah all the way I'm in it to win it and whether you're involved really doesn't seem to bother me it's like I'm in it to win it even if the prize is The shittest prize That could possibly exist I will still win

This relationship 100% And then you get it And you're like Look at that steaming turd He's the one for me Yeah Like it's a joke

But I think it's because I've always been in These relationships With these men Who like give me a bit And then they take it away And they give it back And they take it away

And they're in love With you on Monday And they're not in love With you on Wednesday They're bread crummy And they're in love With you on Saturday And they're not in love

With you on Sunday And they're DMing other women All this bullshit right So you're always It's all about you So you're trying to Win back the validation Because you feel like

When they're not looking at you You don't exist anymore 100% So you're trying to get it back Trying to get it back But this guy was going out When I was a kid Or teen

Young adult I would call it And I was Obsessed And he was just confused And I I think he was like Wow she's really full on

And I was like I love you Do you love me? He's like Yeah I think so I don't know You're in me Do you love me now?

Look at me Look at me in the eyes you're inside me do you love me now what do you think about me now do you like me do you think I'm pretty but so I was mad about him

and he didn't have a fucking clue so because he was like in and out and in and out and in and out I will hold my hands up and say my younger self put all my validation

into what lads thought of me a hundred percent and I'm the opposite of that now which drives Alan insane but anyway your man was constantly trying to break up with me and he did succeed

a couple of times then the last time I was like I'll get pregnant now I was 20 21 I'll get pregnant And then he's tied to me

Forever For life And I'll have his child Oh you're genuinely crazy Yeah yeah yeah Well now I'm much better now I've done the work I should hope so

I've done the work Two months with that therapist I've done the work So you didn't work Not enough babe Not enough work But so But when I think now

Dragging that lad's child Around the world with me Like oh my god But you wouldn't even be You wouldn't be where you are I wouldn't at all I'd be in my mother's attic Absolutely

But this is the thing You would actually probably Still be in those types Of relationships because you wouldn't have had the ability to do the work to get to the point where you are now. You would just be dating someone else who was giving it and taking it away.

Yeah, now I think I've done too much work. Yeah, where you're like emotionally unavailable. I'm like a tough nut to crack now. Do you look at who you are now, say in your 30s, and think like, I don't even recognise that person in their 20s? A hundred percent. Only with the same face. I'm like, it's mad.

But where do you think that that confidence comes from? Because I mean, obviously you can say do the work, But there's such a huge shift between going from somebody who was very body conscious, also very boy conscious to being someone who is like wildly independent, like has the ability to stand up on stage and make a huge fucking audience laugh and have the confidence to do that. Like what changed for you? I don't know. Like, I honestly don't know. There was no one thing. Comedy allowed me to bring out the part of me that I hadn't really been like, not that I was hiding it, but I certainly wasn't making a living out of it.

and so then once you get kind of applauded for that side of yourself like oh actually you're like good at this thing validation exactly I don't know if it's to do with

I don't know it's probably a bit deep but I don't know if it's to do with adoption I don't know what it is but I was always quite like competitive and like wanting to prove

my kind of self and so I always liked being good at things but also I was very easily talked out of things so if someone in my first year of comedy had said you're shit

I would have been like you're fucking you're dead right good luck sorry about that I imagine comedy gives you like a level of humility i imagine there's a lot of times where you deliver your joke and you think you

nailed it and it didn't land people don't laugh and you've got that awkwardness where you're like i think with comedy you need a level of delusion you need that delusion where you can have a really rough gig and be like grant killed it yeah like smash it but i actually think people are asking for their money back from ticket sales and you're like it's like reverse imposter syndrome because you need to pick skin and I think doing like when I started in comedy and like going and doing the clubs and I moved to the UK and I was on my own and I was living in a shithole and I did all the like getting these trains for these towns and doing these it actually really hardened me as a person I became very independent which I've held on to which I really like about myself now

whereas before I didn't have that independence at all I wasn't happy on my own it was always like had some external validation from something whereas now I'm perfectly happy on my own You mentioned just before that you're adopted. Yes. How old were you when you found out that you're adopted? I always knew. It was something that was always just addressed in your family. They made it into a bedtime story.

So it was like, you were so loved. Everyone loved you. They loved you so much. They gave you away. They loved you so much. There was no room for love in the house. I can't cope with the love. They just threw you to the next room.

I'm going to put you on this doorstep. I'm putting you in a basket and leaving you in a phone box because we love you. bless your parents like your adoptive parents yeah i know what's that being like for you did you go and then look did you go and then look for your biological parents did you have that nix i know for some people they don't want to know and then some people are like no i i would like to have some understanding yeah no no i want to know i think as well because i'm quite different where all the love came from i'm quite different i'm like i had this curiosity because i did have

this slight show pony in me and it's not in my family. And so because there wasn't that performance thing in my family, I did think that maybe I would have come from this showbiz dynasty

where they all did like, you know, the panto. No, you can fantasize about anything. So then I found them, they're just normal, they're just totally normal people. And I was like, oh.

Which is bitter to find out. Of course it is. I was looking for some sort of blueprint for myself. But I would just do whatever they were doing. I was like, oh, okay, I'll do panto now.

That's what I'll do. Do you know what I mean? Did you find what you wanted? Did you find out why they gave you up for adoption? They were just young. Right. It was Ireland, it was the 80s. Just too young.

Everyone was adopted in Ireland in the 80s. Were they? No. But that was the bedtime story. Yeah, it's like if you parent, like, because there was so, like, it's a funny, like, even in, because I was born in 1983 and I was adopted out of Roscommon, which is, it's like, you know, it's a rural county in Ireland. It was what it was at the time.

you didn't keep kids out of wedlock really you just didn't and if you did there was a lot of stigma around it it's interesting to me because when you just mentioned before and you said you know like maybe because I was adopted I was being this performer this big personality yeah but also I think like how do you know because you don't know any different than the life that you lived and you grew up like if you always knew you were adopted if you always knew that you were this you know like it's kind of like when people ask things like like how did it affect you you're like I don't fucking know I know it's such a great point because I don't know and it's I read an analogy ones it's like mixing paint it's like mixing paint and then trying to take the colors back

out i don't know i don't know why i am the way i am however i did some reading when i was doing the work yeah with the great therapy people like if you're adopted they will fire that to you anyone will put that as a reason for anything like you go into anywhere and they're like oh you're adopted well obviously that's why you do everything that you do like even though you're like well i don't feel that way but they kind of put it on you so then you absorb that and you think oh shit it must be because i'm adopted i don't know but that's so invalidating because you're like yes I might be adopted but I also got everything I needed from the people who wanted to be my parents but I do think there is I definitely had an identity crisis is probably

too strong but I there was an identity issue there for sure and I think that's a lot of the place where the eating disorder came from and I was definitely I would have liked to have looked like someone or I would have liked to have had more guidance in the way of oh you're just like your uncle john he used to write plays and do this because there was i definitely had an inkling towards the arts writing and that wasn't my family like my brother's an accountant my mom's a nurse my dad he's dead now but he was a draftsman so it was all very technical stuff whereas i was like away with the fairies really and so i definitely wanted to see that in my past and i didn't and i think that definitely led to me doing some pretty stupid shit what would be the goal for

you in comedy or in the next five year goal like are we seeing you on netflix specials are we seeing you on it's a great question britney because netflix are you gonna see me the big wigs um i don't know so i kind of set these when i started i guess i didn't probably didn't have a huge amount of confidence i was kind of going in like all guns blazing But my goals were quite When I look back now They were quite low Low level goals

So then you When you do those goals You're like oh shit I'm through to the next Round What's next What happens next It's like Mario Kart

You want to get to Rainbow Road Yeah I'm like punching the fucking buttons I'm like There's an extra layer Yeah So I don't know Like I have a book deal

I'm going to write a book I'm going to finish 2023 Which is the year that it is now That's correct You're right I emailed my agent the other day And I was saying

Rick The geezer I was like whatever we're doing this year you won't see me for 2023 I'm not opening my mouth and he's like it is 2023

I was like oh my god I've seen you every fucking day I was like oh my god I've literally lost my mind so I was like okay Rick 2024 you're not seeing me

you're not going to see me so I will do this I will ride this amazing wave that I'm thoroughly enjoying at the moment banging out the Prosecco shows wherever they'll take me

the ghosted live tour will take us to the end of this year and the next year I will like disappear well I mean I say disappear you won't

you'll be back you'll take like a month off won't be on tour I'll write the book yeah and just like chill and write a new show yeah and then I'll tour again like I love the live stuff I really really do it's not kind of a gateway into anything else now whether that stuff happens cool but I don't have any massive desire to write a sitcom or any of that kind of stuff I don't how do you go with touring then like in terms of like managing your relationship life back home doing the podcasting obviously you can podcast via zoom but how long when you go and you do these touring stints are you away from what is normal life well

I think I have a kind of hippie in me I like I love the traveling around I really do I feel like I'm well equipped for it I'm not like a homing pigeon I'm happy on the road I love it I love road life so it suits me my worry is what happens like I think now that I'm in it I have all these theories that none of them are true but I reckon as a comic you probably get if you work hard you probably get maybe five tours realistically before you just start repeating the same shit and people move on to the next thing or whatever. I don't know. So you have to kind of look at it in the long term. But I would say I'll be doing this. I would hope to be doing this kind of touring for the next 10, 15 years. That's amazing. That's what I would hope to do. I don't know.

That's what I would hope to do. Do you feel that comedy now is still a very male dominated industry or do you think that there has I mean, we've seen it. There's been such a rise in female comedians in recent times but do you think that it is predominantly still kind of you're paving your way in a male industry I'm always nervous about answering questions like that because I feel like if anyone's going to misrepresent the industry it's going to be me because I don't have a clue what I'm talking about so like I don't know right like for me like I think I came in at a really lucky time Amy Schumer was like I just exploded suddenly everyone wanted a woman on the panel it was like tick tick tick and I kind of came in around the same time so there was a lot

of luck timing whatever the trend at the time was women were trendy in comedy and I think that has trickled down now and now it's to me it feels like there are a lot of women in comedy but the data would probably suggest it's still very much a cock fest but I think it takes a while for things to balance out yeah but also you have to learn your craft this is the problem so when I started because they were desperate for female comedians girls were getting these big gigs when they actually i will hold my hands up and say i got gigs probably before i should have had those gigs because the male comics i was on with had had 10 years doing the clubs before they were getting these shows i because they needed a woman they were like fucking rip your one there he's been

doing it for six months put her in the three arena come on and you're like hello so there's pros and cons you know what i mean but one of the cons was that you get given the job before you're ready for the job because you haven't had the chance to hone yourself in the clubs because women are the hot thing in comedy and they're taking these girls out before they're ready but that almost works as a detriment because i think that says i mean for so long so many men i would say mostly have had the mentality of like oh well women aren't that funny you know chicks aren't that funny i don't have any time for that 100 right but i mean i think also if you're then putting female comedians up on stage who maybe aren't ready for it all that does is reinforces what people are

saying you know it's so interesting and i actually just thought about it there after i said that i it's like the truth is the male comics and look I love some of my very good friends are male comics but I also think women

are more self-aware am I going to get killed for this now absolutely not I think they're more self-aware so like I'd be there going

I'm not fucking ready for this gig whereas the lad beside me would be like nailed it how did I not get this three weeks ago when I started

do you know what I mean I have a fresh two minutes here like bring it like that I genuinely think you do need a bit of delusion in the job because you need to have

a thick skin So when you fail And in comedy Your failures are very public Because you're failing In front of an audience You're not failing privately And they love to publicise

A failure too Oh of course Do you ever have to worry about With the stuff That comes out of your mouth I mean Thank goodness You have a good producer

There to trim some things Yeah Do you have an episode To 15 minutes Yeah Do you ever have to worry I've been in the studio For nine days

What do you have And that's all Dissuadation you Happy New Year girls But Do you ever have to worry about being cancelled. When you're a comedian, you have to flirt with that line between what is and isn't appropriate. And it's a fine line. Yeah. I think because I used to work

in PR, I have a kind of innate sense of where the line is. I like to kind of poke it, but it's different on stage. You're in a room, people know to take it with a pinch of salt. They can't read, they can take it out of context if they want, but usually the people in the room are there because they're on your side. Whereas a podcast can just, it's like Twitter. Like they just take them out it can't and then it's like suddenly you know 100 yeah so with the pod i'd definitely be more careful with what i say see so i don't listen to the podcast because you don't know what makes it i don't know what's in it and i should listen i should because i would definitely be able to contribute then to chats about like how to make it a better podcast but i can't listen to myself

i listened once oh my god it's not good for morale i listened once i'd obviously had two gin and tonics listened rang joe crying joe's our producer and i was like i want to be in on the edit we sound like fucking idiots and he was like you're never listening to the podcast again and that was the last conversation we ever had so I've never listened to it since so I have no idea what's in it I do trust Vogue and Jo Vogue listens to it every week and then she'll say in the whatsapp oh Jo maybe she'd take out when Joanne said that and I was like how have you not taken that out already how is Vogue editing this ha ha ha but so but it's funny like to be fair Vogue actually gets more shit than I do I think does she yeah Vogue gets more shit than I do because

But do you think she gets the mummy shaming and things like that? She gets it all because firstly we have different careers So like Vogue is like a presenter Like mainly And now she does a lot of online stuff Whereas as a comedian If you present yourself from the start as having no morals or ethics No one expects anything from you

That's true because you can only go up Do you know what I mean? But Vogue would have presented herself as a woman with morals and ethics So then she can't go back on that now But it's also that people see you and they have an expectation Like if you're on TV and you're presenting or whatever But people are like, oh, I know that person. And they feel like they're your friend.

And then you get on a podcast and you speak and you be you. And some people just are offended by who you are as a person. Oh, yeah. You can't please those people. You can't please them all. And like, I mean, we've experienced it. We're careful with the content that we put out because we never want to be. You don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

Yeah, exactly. And we don't either. And we never want to be misunderstood. You know, we never want to say something and then not realize the context as to how somebody else has interpreted it. but it does mean that we have to have a real very conscious ear

over what we're putting out but you're right some people will just intentionally interpret you the wrong way like they will just intentionally think there's no good will there

they want to think badly of you so they'll be looking for stuff that you've said well Joanne the Prosecco Express your comedy show the last show in Australia unfortunately is

tonight so people miss that but are you coming back? I'm doing shows in America I'm in Chicago and Boston on the 11th and 12th of May if anyone's around we'll be popping in

all our American listeners going to Canada Dubai America Yeah Will we see you back In Australia anytime soon? So I think me and Vogue

Are coming back To do The Ghosted Yes In December Yes Let's do Let's get you back on both of you Yeah we'd love that

We would love that My suck today is this episode It's so cool Okay Alright guys It is time for Suck It Sweet I was serious The highlight

And the low light Of each and every week I know you were And that's going to stay in My sweet's the episode because it's so funny. My suck's the episode because we're so cooked. Can that be a thing? Yeah, sure.

Or your family coming, like putting your nan in an Uber. I don't know, seeing your mum. Hearing people's sexy talk is a highlight. Okay, what is your actual highlight? My highlight was my family coming. Yeah, my whole family came. It was really nice. They've never come to see me.

How long have you lived in Sydney for? A couple of eight years. Yeah. It's a long way to come from Coffs Harbour though. I'm one of four kids. You're not the favourite? I'm not the priority. Of course not.

No, it's not that I'm not the favourite. I'm not the priority because my brothers and sisters are all spread out, right? I'm the only one in Sydney and, like, my brothers have multiple kids. They're up on the Gold Coast. They're the favourite because they provided grandchildren. Not the favourite. You're really pushing that one home. It's not that they're the favourite, but, like,

if my parents and my family get a weekend off, they kill more birds with one stone by going up seeing my sister, my brother, the grandkids, and I'm just left in Sydney alone. like if you come to see me it's like i'm taking you out to the clubs like you're not coming for a wholesome weekend we did not go out to the club's room about at nine o'clock so it's like if they get time off they're gonna go and see everyone at once so it's like they've never come to see me and my suck would have to be i don't have one i can't think do you know what tell me just it just means you didn't prep you just didn't think about your week something bad

happened you just haven't spent two seconds thinking about it i know how shit your life is Brittany. Something bad has happened. My suck is I had a fight with Ben. Oh yeah, you're having a fight with him now. I'm fighting with him right now like you're fighting with Matt and it's also something equally stupid. We're not actually fighting but I'm making it a fight. It's not a fight. Sometimes you just have one

in you. You just want to have a fight. Yeah, he just said one thing that annoyed me and then I'm just really hanging on to it. I shouldn't have to and I'm like, you will be on your knees apologising, not doing what you sickos get your head out of the gutter. He'll be on his knees when he's in australia licking my vagina not mine ew yours ew yeah he better not be licking your vagina

where is this going okay i've had enough what's your suck my stop thinking about ben right now i can see you imagining oh yeah oh no yeah oh so now he's ugly what is it you want him to go down on you or he's gross which one you go down on you you can have his head between your legs jesus christ i know we share a lot of things but men is not one no no no remember that one time that you did date a guy who I had had, I tried to have sex with him. It didn't work. I didn't have sex with him because you told me you tried to have sex with him. Would you have sex with a guy I've had sex with? Is it Channing Tatum? Yes. Depends on who it is, doesn't it? Absolutely. It depends on who it is. If literally any of my exes, you can have them all. They suck. I wouldn't want one

of them. They're a giant walking red flagpole. If it was someone's uber hot, someone that you'd brag about. I don't brag about my sex capades, but if it was like a Brad Pitt, I'd be bragging about him. Nah, I've really had sex with anyone I'd brag about. I mean, like I had some fine exes. I can't say they're all terrible I wonder if any of them listen I had sex with one person from Hollywood I don't know if I ever said this I had sex with one person from Hollywood who I'm not gonna tell you you can't drop that then no one cares I'm not telling the podcast but what I'm going to say is the reason I've never said anything about it is because he's the one oh maybe I did he's the one that like I went out met some Hollywood friends and it was all great he was

here filming a big movie and then he's the one that told me that I had a real masculine energy do you remember that essentially he was like I don't know if he's trying to give me a compliment but he started to call me quite manly and I was really offended but you still fucked him yeah correct that is correct okay all right my suck for the week we made love anyway keep going yeah I'm sure you did my suck for the week is being at the hospital all weekend can I also say I had a glimpse into the future I realized what parenting like a 10 year old kid is going to be like the hospital the peds emergency was just there was like 60 kids in there it was so full and they were all children wearing sports jerseys like every single child from the weekend from sunday

had injured themselves at school sports yes that was me for 10 years i'm the person that did those x-rays i get the ct it's a nightmare don't put your kids in sport guys think of the hospital workers i realized that my suck was the realization of the rest of my life i was like oh my god i'm going to spend the rest of every weekend at a sports game and sometimes at the hospital because they're going to hurt themselves yeah your life you don't have a life anymore i can't believe you've just realized this no dedicated your life to two other small humans i mean my sweet for the week is that i went out for a lovely dinner on friday night which feels like a million years ago but yeah four million years ago matt and i went out it was two nights when we loved each other

and we were a happy couple did you have sex no because we had sex on thursday night and then we were full of pasta we had sex at night before yeah i was full and then we got home and keisha stuck around for ages chatting so then so then i was like oh the mood's gone killer the babysitter stayed for so long we were like come on leave now we're gonna fuck and didn't happen so no i'm joking oh my god keisha you ruined single-handedly ruined their sex life or did you save us from having to have sex who depends on how you look at it you're welcome well so you're in laura's good books in matt's bad books no so he came home from dinner keisha was on the couch and we chatted for a while and then we went to bed and cuddled and then we went to the hospital and spent the

rest of our life there anyway that's it can i just say one thing though before we wrap this it's very important i feel like it's very important and this is to any mums out there because i think i've shat on the whole having to take my kid to hospital thing enough on this episode but i do want to say sometimes you can feel really dumb because you get to hospital and your kid seems fine right like they improve and then you think you're wasting people's time or you're trying to like should i be here shouldn't i be here i so believe that if you think you need to take your kid to hospital just take them and then leave it up to a professional to decide whether or not they need to be there or not because it is so stressful trying to figure out

is my child sick enough to be at hospital if you think they're sick enough just go and yes it's annoying spending six hours in emergency with them they also are very annoyed by it but like it's the best place to be absolutely because the worst thing to happen is you to not and then something is oh my god i joke about this but like i will spend every day for the rest of my life in hospital if i need to for my kids i mean i joke about it too we always used to complain as hospital workers like to our friends and family like oh my god it was so busy so many people here but when you're in the moment and somebody walks in because everyone laura i can tell you every parent comes in and says that oh i'm sorry i'm sure it's fine i don't want to waste it it's not wasting our time

but trust your gut if something you feel like it's not right that's why people are there that's why health professionals are there so just go so you know what if you need me i'll be there friday saturday sunday so laura is that the psychologist for the next week okay that is it from us if you love the episode you know the drill by now go and subscribe to the podcast is that what you do subscribe it's a little plus thing in the corner leave a review a nice one five stars if you haven't done that yet we need them yeah you can hit follow i don't actually think it says subscribe anymore it's like a follow button so it's free so we're not saying subscribe and pay money but it doesn't it does mean that like it'll pop into your feed automatically you don't ever

have to look for it you don't have to download it if you're going on a plane or you're out of service and it's just it just takes the ease away you'll you'll never miss us again we'll always be here waiting and you can also go and join the conversation on social media we have an instagram it's life uncut podcast we have a tiktok life uncut podcast and we have the discussion group which is the life uncut discussion group oh my god speaking of discussion group one little thing so i put a post in about my neighbors alex and eugene in scotland and you guys i said look he might creep in here and see this and join the group so just say a big welcome i don't think he's made himself known in the group yet but I woke up this morning to must be 32 screenshots

from Alex and Eugene next door they went in and screenshot every comment that you guys wrote on that picture and sent it back to me and they were so cute and I'm like Alex have you told anyone you're in there yet I was like just say hi it's Alex but I think he's just lurking in the background stop lurking that's weird he read every comment from you guys and he was really stoked and then he sent them all back to me like I hadn't done the post myself. Welcome. Welcome to the group, Alex and Eugene. And if you want to join the group as well,

we will give you a one-on-one shout-out to every single new member. Don't forget, tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friends and share the love because we love love. We'll be right back.