Life Uncut - LIFE UNCUT RADIO SHOW - 26th Feb

Episode Date: February 26, 2022

Here is it Lifers, our Saturday morning radio show all packaged up in a sweet little morsel for your listening pleasure! Today we are talking about your neighbour who you hate, we catch up with Simone Holtznagal from SAS and Britt's dog Delilah brought home a very unwanted preset.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut, I'm Brittany and I'm Laura and today this is our radio show which we do every single Saturday but if you didn't get to listen to it live. We package it up all nice and pretty right here for the rest of you to listen to. We have a great episode. We've got someone calling in from SAS. We're speaking to Simone Holtznegel and we chat about why she went on it, whether she really was that fussy about the porridge. And actually that was a pretty funny conversation. Also, it's so annoying. I know how she feels like it's so annoying when there's things written about you in the media and you don't have control over it. And we do this thing on the radio show where it's called headline and

head lies. And you guys know how much we complain about Daily Mail on the normal podcast. And this is kind of just like a nice way for people to air out what actually happened. The truth behind the stories. Britt is also sharing a story about something truly revolting that Delilah brought home. And I want to talk about my neighbor who I hate, but it's not from my new house. I just want to make that very clear in case any of my neighbors at my new house are listening. It's from my old house. No, Laura thought she would wait till she convinced me to move into her old house to tell me just how bad the neighbor was like no that's you waited till i signed sealed and delivered on that stop it you knew about the neighbor i just hadn't told anyone listening about

the neighbor yet you were well aware about the neighbor upstairs i didn't know she was going to abuse me at 10 a.m for talking outside in my own house that is definitely something that she does you will enjoy that now cute that's all yours lucky i don't really do any washing the life uncut radio show with brit huckley and laura burn We've got love. One kiss. Best friends, BFFs forever or maybe not from now. We've got matching bracelets.

Do you? Where's mine? Do you know what, actually? You have a jewellery brand and you've never given me a matching BFF piece of jewellery. Maybe I'll make us all matching bracelets. Will you all wear them? What if they say LU on them? What's that for?

Life Uncut. Oh, my God. I thought it was love you. I don't know. What, just the letter U? It can have so many meanings. LU. I love it.

Next week, that'll be what we talk about. Anyway, we're talking right now. Prince Dog Delilah. Prince Dog Delilah. What has she done now, Bryn? I tell you what, she's keeping me on my toes. Okay, I got a dog a little while ago, a little puppy. Her name is Delilah.

I recently moved into a new home and she has an outdoor area. Now, she started off as an apartment dog, so she never really knew what the outside world was. Obviously, I took her for walks, but she never just had her own time outside unattended. To explore and dig holes. To explore. And she wanted it too.

Have you been to Brittany's house when the dog's inside? Oh, yeah. It's madness. I try and record a podcast with Brittany every week with the dog inside. The first time I went over, I was drinking a White Claw. Brittany's like, do you want a beverage? I'm like, sure. Before I could have a sip, the dog latched onto it like the shark from Jaws.

And there were four holes in the can. I lost the drink in 10 seconds flat. And my dog got drunk. Anyone who thinks having kids is hard, get a puppy. Oh, it's rough. It's 10 times worse. What has she done? Okay, so it was probably about 10 o'clock at night.

And I left the door open. She was out in the yard having a great old time. So I thought, and then I get a phone call. Now, I never answer phones, but I don't know, especially at that time. I was like, who's calling at night? Let it ring out. It rang again. Let it ring out.

Then I got a text message. Hey, just letting you know I've got your dog. And I was like, oh, my God. And so I called the number straight away and I said, hey, sorry, I didn't, I thought you were a telemarketer. And she's like, oh, I'm down an alley. I've got your dog. Because it's obviously really dark.

There's no lights in the alley. I'm bringing her home but she's got something in her mouth but I can't see what it is and I was beside myself because she's the sort of dog that has no spatial awareness she would have run out in front of a car so and I didn't even know she was gone I don't know how she got out so I've gone out to meet this girl and she's like run her towards me I've grabbed Delilah opened the back gate Delilah's running side and I can see something in Delilah's mouth but I still couldn't see what but it looked quite large oh god so I thanked this girl and I went inside Delilah went straight to the corner and put it down and sat next to it and looked up at me like she was the proudest

little puppy in the whole world what did she bring you no i feel like we're gonna have to call wires after this what do you think delilah brought home oh like a rat yeah i'm thinking possum a huge possum no that's very bad they're native animals i know but what i would like i know and what i would like to say is i'm giving delilah the benefit of the doubt she if you've seen Delilah, she is not a hunting dog. I'm going to think she's a small puppy. I just think she's found it. I think that there has been a possum somewhere.

I can't imagine her tracking this down. So I think she's found it already dead. And they like the smell of that stuff too. They're attracted to that. But my point is, I can taste it. Why? You're all describing it too much. I'm a very independent woman.

I have lived alone and been on my own a very long time. There is nothing I can't do. I can change a tire. I can fix a toilet. I can do it all. I can't pick up a dead animal. It just sat in the corner of my yard. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

It's still in Brittany's lounge room right now. She just put a little bucket over it. So, Delilah, yeah, Delilah's got a new toy, you know. They'd co-host for the podcast next week. They're awesome. The Life Uncut Radio Show. With Britt Hockley and Laura Byrne. We love them!

One kiss. Ladies, you're both squeaky clean when it comes to taxes. Obviously. I like that little sound effect there. Thank you. Yes, we're talking about taxes. Yeah, we are. The crazy things that you guys are claiming.

Well, a banker overseas, Pian Vincennes, Vin says he claimed strip club visits. He claimed it as a tax write-off. $300,000 for strip club visits. That's a lot of strip club visits. It wasn't one-off. Maybe it was a one-off. Maybe she was very expensive.

Maybe. I think you could get away with doing it once or twice. But if you're claiming $300,000, there's definitely someone who's looking at your tax books and being like, oh, time for an order. Red flags. Also, $300,000 in a year, that's got to be every night. Yeah, and at strip clubs you use dollar bills too. He'd have RSI from the constant dollar billies.

He just drives in in his ute with a bag of money. Oh, 131065, what did you write off as a tax expense? We've got Hayley. Morning, Hayley. Hey. So a couple of years ago, I'm a teacher and I travelled around Europe and because I teach languages and history, I was able to claim expenses to the Eiffel Tower, to lots of museums.

Oh, you're getting cultured. Yeah, I was getting cultured. It's very important to impart that knowledge onto the youth As an Australian, I know I understand this one. Yeah, teachers need more anyway. So I think it's fair. Yes. All you've got to do is throw in a conference somewhere

wherever you go anyway. You just throw a conference in. Yeah, pretty much. Just pick up a couple of business cards and say that you had a few work meetings and that's it, you're done. I am going to book a conference on a Greek island this year in the Bahamas is my next conference. Hayley's smart.

Let's do Jared, 131065. Hello, Jared. What did you write off as a tax expense, you cheeky bugger? Well, a couple of years back, actually, it was around my birthday. I had a bit of extra cash lying around, so I decided to splurge on some high-end outfits, you know what I mean? Oh, I do know what you mean. Like, we're talking Gucci?

Oh, absolutely. Like, I can't even think off the top of my head how many different stores I went to. How much money did you spend, though? Ooh, it was around, I want to say close to two grand. Good, yes. A lot of money. Did you keep the itemised?

So you got one Gucci sock? Yeah, pretty much. Well, it wasn't many items, but I definitely felt very rich afterwards. Did you keep an itemised receipt? When you claim this in tax, were you like, oh, I'll just shimmy a non-itemised receipt? Or did you say, oh, look, it's my work wardrobe. Well, how did you do this?

Asking for a friend. I definitely made sure. She's writing notes as well, Jared. Right, okay. So I feel like submitting an itemised receipt for your Gucci handbags is probably not the way to go. No. What did you write it off as?

Because you were prepared in case they audited you, Jared? What was your excuse? Well, I actually am an online tutor, so I put a couple of items of clothing into my lessons. I reckon, Laura, do you reckon the three of us could go shopping at Dior or Gucci and write it off as an outfit for radio when no one can actually see us? Can we write this off as radio? That's what I want to know. How about you give it a stab and tell me how it goes on the next tax return?

Just say Jared sent you. Thanks, Jared. Casey on 131065, wrap this up for us. What did you claim on tax? um i wasn't when the search came on tax but it was um through the company uber account i was hooked up through our um like same uber account we just had a company version and i realized one night when i was out and i had a friend book an uber on my account he was like oh i just put it through it was like fun stuff it's the code i was like oh no that was my work account and they

never said anything about it and so from then on it was kind of easier after a couple of drinks just to continue with the account that it was on. Well, I mean, if they want you to turn up safely at work the next week, you need to get that Uber home. Yeah, so are you claiming like 1am Ubers and they're never asking for receipts? You're just like, yep, it's a work expense. And do you swing by the kebab shop?

Yeah, there were definitely a few via Maccas drive-thru, but yeah, it was just hooked up to their company Uber account, so it just kind of kept going out. So I didn't really have to claim anything, which made the whole process a lot easier. I think this is fine, because I think you can also, So if you do get caught out, you just say, oh, it was an honest mistake. So you just run this one until you get caught.

You criminals trying to justify criminal behaviour. No. It's been an honest mistake for three years going now. This is the Life Uncut Radio Show. Britt Hockley and Laura Byrne. On Kiss. Ladies, we're talking, I can't believe I'm about to say this. We're talking sex robots.

We are. Ooh. It's definitely not the two words I thought would be in the same sentence. Also, did I say that sexy? Yeah, she did. Did you notice that? I do. I do really enjoy this, guys.

It's called method acting. There is an article that has come out of the Netherlands. She's a futurist. She's somebody who looks at trends and what might be happening in the deep, dark future. Her name is Rowanne van Voorst. Of course it is. Say that ten times. And she reckons that we're all going to be getting down and dirty with sex robots in

the future. What do you mean? Well, apparently it's going to become a very staple and more acceptable part of our I have a healthy sex life. Also, virtual reality headsets. Oh, I've got one of them. I've got a headset. What, for sex?

Yeah, like putting on a virtual set. Oh, don't speak for me. Laura, no, I asked Mish, do you have one for sex? Mish uses it all the time. I have one, and I have watched on it as a joke to see what it was like, as if you wouldn't. Like you watch pornography on the virtual, and what was it like? Did it feel real?

Listen, all it is is you go on Google on the headset and you watch it. So it's just like you're in a movie theater. So if anything, it's more awkward because you feel like there's people around you. It's very bizarre. So they think this is the way of the future. I don't think I'm getting on board with this. Yeah, but apparently there is over 40 brothels all across the world. I mean, 40 doesn't sound like many at the moment,

but there's 40 that already are using these sex robots. What kind of robots? Guys, I don't have the... Do you want me to draw you a picture? Did you bring a robot into studio? I didn't go and test one out. I didn't drive down to Hyundai and drive it out for a little rope around and then come back for half an hour.

A test drive? Yeah, I was trying to think of the word, a test drive. Please, if I ever get to the point where I'm considering a sex robot, please, one of you, hook me up with a friend. Hook me up, set me up, don't let me go down the sex robot. You guys use toys though, right? Yes, but I mean a sex robot is a bit different. Is it though?

I guess it's just a larger toy. Yeah. But I think the thing that's a bit strange is that they're trying to get them to be so lifelike, so human-like, to replace humans. So if your partner was like, hey, I don't really want to go and use toys anymore, I want to go and have sex with an incredibly lifelike sex robot, would that be cheating?

Oh. Or if you were with a partner and you used a sex robot. Is that having a menage a trois? Then what if the battery's... Well, do you know what? Maybe no, because there's no emotional connection. It's just the same as using toys, though. There's no emotional connection.

There's nothing there. I mean, you say this, but there's definitely been a man, I can't remember which country he was from, but he married his blow-up doll. So I think that... Yeah, but a woman married a bridge. Let them live, Laura. We're not here to yuck anyone's yum

None of the life I can get ready That's not what it's about No, that's not what we do Look, I mean it's not for me But if it's for you, great Everyone's welcome at life Stop looking at me when you say that You did say you have VR

And you've watched it It was one time It was once Can you bring it into studio? Can we try it? Yeah, you can take it for a weekend We'll put the porn up on the big LCD screen We've got here

Laura, we do not do that in the workplace Come on with me Getting saucy for your Saturday morning. The Life Uncut Radio Show on KISS. Very soon, Simone Holtznagel from SAS Australia. She's doing a great job on that show. Mitch, I'd love to see you on SAS Australia. I couldn't do it.

They'd have to keep a halter monitor on me at all times. Actually, if anyone from production is listening, please, Mitch Turi, I would pay to watch you on that show. Why? Because I think you'd be hilarious. Can you imagine him trying not to laugh when the lieutenants are in his face? How do you go in really cold water? That would be the thing that I think I couldn't handle.

I have cold showers after my morning showers every day. Oh, you've already been training. Do you know, I think the cold water would be the bit that would get me, or maybe heights as well, but cold water. Actually, probably the whole thing. Oh, mine's the running. Yeah. It's a lot.

Let's see what Simone is like, how she handled it, because she's joining us very soon. Simone will be on the show in a bit. In the meantime, we are doing a segment which we do on our podcast from time to time. We are accidentally unfiltered. What? Yes, what is this, ladies?

How does this work? Accidentally Unfiltered is where we get your most embarrassing stories. The worst thing that's ever happened to you that you never wanted anyone to know about it. And then you tell us and we all laugh together. On the radio. On the radio or on the podcast. But it is a great segment. We do it every week on our Tuesday episode.

And I have got one for you guys. Hit us, Laura. Oh, my God. I am dying of embarrassment. My sister and I went to the beach for a swim. We always go to the local dog beach with our pup. While we were in the water, I watched a huge dog come over to where we had left our towels and bag and do a massive poo.

I then watched as the dog went back over to its own picnic rug, sit down, and then I watched as the guy and girl on that rug, who watched the whole thing happen, patted the dog on the belly and then rubbed it. They didn't even get up and clean up the poo. I was so furious and I stormed out of the water. I grabbed the poo in a dog bag and rather than walking it to the bin, I went straight over to the picnic rug and basically threw it

at the guy and the girl and said, clean up after your dog. But as I did it, the poo bag broke open and the poo spilled out onto their towel. Aggressive. The man and the woman pointed at another man and said, yeah, it's not our dog. It's that man's dog. How could you imagine?

But also maybe then pick the poo up and do a second throw because you really should pick up after your dogs. I'm sorry, but I would be ropeable. If I was on a picnic minding my own business and someone came and threw poo at me and abused me, I would be. And it was not your poo. It wasn't even your poo. It's not my poo.

Even if it was my poo, don't throw the shit at me. How do you say that to someone? That's not my poo. You just say, that's not my poo. How can you confirm if it's someone's poo? Because they don't have a dog. You can't leave your dog poo around, though. That's a 101.

If you're going to be a responsible pet owner, you've always got to carry a bag with you and keep an eye on the prize. Or you get a leaf. I've grabbed a leaf before. You do what you need to do to make sure someone doesn't step in the poo. An empty coffee cup. You just go, whatever's in the vessel, you just go and collect it. You mean one from the shop or one of the glass ones you brought from home?

No, I'm not saying put it in your keep cup. That's what I just, I was like, too far, Laura. You do not put the poop in your keep cup. All new in 22. For your Saturday morning, the last uncut radio show with Britt Hockley and Laura Byrne. On Kiss. Joined by another very special guest,

Simone Holtzmagle is here from SAS Australia. Hello, Simone. Thanks for being here. Hello. How are you? Thanks for having me. Simone, SAS, how has it been, hey? And what was wrong with you?

Why did you sign up to SAS? look i was just really bored um sounds like why i went on the bachelor yes seriously i'm glad that i did it i won't say that i had fun while i was doing it but it's definitely been entertaining to watch back what do you think was harder for you because you did i'm a celebrity quite a couple years ago now 2018 what was harder i'm a celebrity or sas oh sas is a hundred percent harder i'm a celebs kind of more based around fun but like these challenges that we're doing you could literally die do you have to sign really hurt yourself do you know i think it's so good hearing that because when you watch it you're like surely it can't be as hectic as what it looks like it is

on tv but it really is it really is and obviously there's so many safety things in place but i was kind of thinking that like you know we'd get there and we'd get to do the challenge and they'd show it to us and then they'd be like okay now we're going to go through safety things but no you just like they're like okay watch this once and once only because it's all about uh retaining information like while you're under extreme pressure in these sorts of environments when you're thrown into the reality tv world you tend to really bond with the people that you're doing it with who out of the other celebrities did you become the most close to well i was really lucky that anna heinrich was there because we've known each other for years and we've just gotten closer obviously because

we figured out that we were both doing this show possibly before we went into the show so we were speaking like possibly i wonder how that happened we may or may not have figured out and certainly didn't break contract whilst doing it so anna and i knew each other so we're even closer now and absolutely adore Ebony. We've got a big group chat, like, with everyone in it. What do you think was the hardest thing of all the things, of all the activities, of everything that you had to do on the show? What's been the hardest part of SAS so far?

For me, I think the hardest part was the plane. And not that I've seen a couple of things online, like not that I spend a lot of time reading the comments. You know, you've both been on television. You do see them. and people just be like oh she cries all the time I got in there and I had like a massive panic attack on the first day like with the plane thing because and I didn't tell anyone this pre-show when we had to fill out all our paperwork and do our psychologist stuff I actually like I've like

lost family members in a small plane crash that landed in water so that just like sent me spiraling from the first day and I was just so in my head I was like having panic attacks every day so it was really like tricky for me and watching it back I'm like gosh that really wasn't that hard like the plane was hard but like last night I was watching the tunnel and I'm like that wasn't that hard like obviously the tunnel's gonna be big enough for like Jeff Hugo to get through like I'm gonna make it you know but they don't show that kind of thing do they like I mean I watch that and I look at you and that scene now that plane scene differently after hearing you say that you know there's there is a trauma attached to that they don't show those things so everything

once there's a reference to it makes such a difference how do you deal with that when you see the people uh who watch the show you see it in the media you know being called a princess or being you know reading things that are not nice and knowing that your experience of that is very unique how does that leave you feeling honestly like sometimes it picks me off but i'm like annoyed about it for five minutes and i'm over it because it's funny because like going into this show they were like oh you know like what you want like do you want the public like perception to change a view. And I'm like, I couldn't give a f**k

on the public perception of me. But also, like, I know how I come across and, like, I very much play into that character as well. Like, I know what is going to get people kind of whether they like me or not. It's kind of like I play into that blonde model stereotype and I've been doing it for 12 years and it's worked out quite well for me.

So, mate, are you going to stick around for a sec? because there's a game we do on the show called Head Lies. We bring big headlines about you, about our guests. Some of them are real. Some of them are fake. It's your job to debunk them. Are you ready to play? Got it.

I can't lie. Head Lies. So, Simone, we're going to read some out to you. You tell us if it is a head lie or a headline. Simone Holtz-Nagel in talks to become a 2022 Bachelorette, marking the fifth reality television show appearance. Yeah, no, that's definitely not true. Head lie.

Where do you do The Bachelorette? Honestly, like, it would be easy for me to say yes because, you know, everyone loves to get paid. But I think there's just, like, so much pressure that comes with that show, like, so heavily scrutinised and your relationship is under so much pressure right from the get-go. So I probably, I don't need that in my life. I like that your head is in the right place

and you're thinking about getting paid, not about getting a boyfriend. I know, it's not I love love. Well, I do love money. I do, so do I. everyone does all right simone holtznagel caught stealing teammates food after refusing to eat porridge on sas australia that is definitely a lie i didn't steal anyone's food i gave anna my porridge and she gave me her egg oh okay so you did it you did a breakfast sharing yeah that's

nice okay we're sharing how do we feel about porridge now after the whole sas porridge debacle oh who says that you have to like porridge also let's not forget that i was in the jungle for like 46 days or something and i had porridge every single day there so that is why i don't like porridge and also i don't think anyone else is realizing it's not like nice porridge with like honey and sugar and milk it's like oh it's just water it's like you could literally like make a small house out of it if you really need to you could make like a clay house okay so you're gonna to love this headline model simone hates nagle refuses to eat breakfast on sas australia after fine dining at her sister's boyfriend justin hem's expensive restaurants for months and has a

meltdown where she has to clean the toilet no i did see that the other day that's so annoying like leave my sister out of it for starters um who wants to clean the toilet like who is ever that jazz to clean toilets that 17 other people have been using like get over like do you know What do you want me to do? When I saw that, I literally said that, Simone. I was like, what person in this country watching that would have wanted to do that? No one would have been like, woohoo, I'm on toilet duty. Anyway, Simone, thank you so much for coming on, for playing Headline and Headlines.

Good luck with the rest of SAS. Can't wait to see what happens. Thank you so much for having me, guys. It was so good having you. SAS Australia, yeah, return 7.30 Monday on Channel 7 and 7+. Good luck, Simone. See you soon, Simone. Thank you.

All new in 22. Britt Hockley and Laura Byrne getting saucy for your Saturday morning. The Life Uncut Radio Show on KISS. We're talking hating your neighbour because, Laura, I believe you can officially say it out loud now. Hi. Do you know who I am? Hi.

Hi. Laura just said hi. You don't. Hi, Laura. I actually didn't. I said do you know? No, no. You said hi.

You said hi. It came out sounding like a hi. We'll play it back for you. I just feel like hate is a really strong word. Okay. How do you feel? I don't like my old neighbour. and I couldn't share this with you all before

because I lived in the house and I was so fearful that maybe they would hear it. But now I can share with you because I don't live there anymore and I don't care. Britt does. Yeah, but I moved into your house and now they're my neighbour. So you can take this as a warning. I want to tell you how bad your upstairs neighbour is.

But what if this reflects onto me now? What if they, instead of taking it out on you, they're like, well, it's the next best thing. I don't reckon she's listening, but, you know, just in case. Just ignore all that. Britt doesn't live there. I don't live there anymore. Let me tell you about my neighbour.

so she was in the apartment directly above me and she's the neighbor in the building that kind of everyone's a bit like oh have you met the neighbor yet oh the the neighbor the neighbor and we were downstairs and we had like a little outdoor patio and every day i do a lot of washing i have two kids all day that's all i do wash hang clothes out and so i would put my washing out on the little line that we have outside there and every single day as soon as my washing went out as not even assume when it was close to being dry she would decide that that would be the perfect time to wash her balcony and without looking she would squeegee all the stuff off her balcony onto my clothes oh no this is not a one-time occurrence this is like a weekly occurrence and to the point

where i have i had had a conversation i had said please can you look over the fence please just check my that my washings is not there one time she even did it when i was standing outside I was like taking the washing off the line that was dry and then I saw it, the waterfall of dirty water like coming out over the balcony Okay, as someone that lives now in that apartment are we talking the actual clothesline to the side? Are we talking the clothesline part?

So both, I would put like a portable one out there and I would also use the clothesline to the side It was a lot, guys And so you put your hand up and you're like Hey, this is not cool and she just squeezed you in the face No, then she just, do you know what she did? She just walked backwards in some way

So then she didn't look over, she didn't acknowledge, she didn't say sorry. She knew what she was doing. She just went silent and then just disappeared from the balcony. Oh, the old, I'm in a tunnel, can't hear you. But I want to know, surely I'm not the only person who has a neighbour who sucks. I'm sure there's lots of people who live in apartment buildings or maybe you live alongside someone and you just don't get on with your neighbour. Yeah, give us a call. Why do you hate your neighbour?

What do they do that irks you? Right now we're talking about Laura's neighbour, who is now Britt's neighbour, who you hate. Set it up again. Look, it's a bit of a messy situation, but I used to live in an apartment building. I have a neighbor upstairs, and she was my old neighbor. And at the time, I could never share with you all how much I disliked my other neighbor because I didn't want her to know that I was telling these stories. But now Britt lives in my apartment, my old apartment.

She moved in. So Laura feels like it's safe to out the neighbor now because I'll be the one that has the repercussions. So now it's Britt's neighbor. Yep. And I feel like you could take it as that it's me warning you about the upstairs neighbor. Yeah, she did already yell at me the other day. Now, I'm the quietest person in the world because I don't really have many friends. Like, let's be real.

She does that from time to time. I was outside with my dog trainer because I've got a dog trainer. It was 10 a.m. in the morning and he was doing some training and it was normal talking and she started to yell at the dog trainer. So you get it too. It's not just you, Laura. She doesn't like it when anyone uses the outdoor space during the daytime hours and talks loudly or talks at normal talking volume. She doesn't like when you breathe. No, but before we get in, we do want to take your calls and hear why you hate your neighbor.

But I just want to end this on a positive. When I moved into my house, not your house, my house I've just left, my neighbour, as I was moving in, he came across, knocked on the door, and then he said, I saw you moving in. I've just baked you a fresh loaf of banana bread. And he gave me a hot loaf of banana bread. Good neighbours exist, don't they? Then he asked if he wants, he's like, can I help you build your furniture?

And I said, oh, I'm very independent. I'm good. And then I proceeded to put a screwdriver through my toe. And then he asked if you have a boyfriend. I'm pretty sure after that as well. And then he asked for my number, yeah. And then balcony water was squeegeed onto the banana bread. Now it's soggy.

All right, 131065, tell us your neighbour from hell stories. Claudia on 131065, you're on the air with the girls. What's your neighbour from hell story? Hi, guys. So I have quite an interesting neighbour next door. He is a mechanic, it seems to be, except he only does his work at night time. So we're not quite sure if he's an actual mechanic.

No, he is moonlighting as a mechanic. No mechanic starts their work at night. And what sort of work? Is he just tinkering around in the garage? Like, what's he doing? I don't think McKinney's a tinker. I don't know. So he starts his work at about 9 o'clock every night,

and he goes right through until maybe, like, 3, 4 in the morning. And during the night, like, all our bedroom windows are on his side of the house. Like, our fence is neighbouring his side. So we hear, like, lots of noises going on at night and see lots of cars drive down his driveway. your tinkering neighbor is tinkering drugs we're not quite sure yeah but we've we think he's a mechanic because we sort of hear a lot

of cars and tinkering around and he seems to wear like a mechanic sort of uniform so he has this shirt with well let me ask you let me ask you a question does he wear a very deep black hood at night no no so he wears full red like red pants red polo shirt with like racing stripes and like a racing logo maybe he's just got like insomnia or something and this is his hobby he likes to like do up cars at a night time I don't know but that's horrible I feel very sorry for you let's go to Genevieve hello you're on with the girls what's your neighbor from hell story hey um so my neighbor steals my dog constantly like fully takes him from my backyard and lets him have a play date with their dog no do you know i'm sort of here for that no i think it's you can't just

take someone's animal but taylor does he just take it like with good intentions just to have a little play and give him some company well we weren't sure whether he was actually trying to breed them because he's got a girl and we've got a boy dachshund so i have been keeping an eye out to make sure if she's getting a bit lack of a tummy, but I haven't seen the tummy yet. Well, if she does, I certainly would be asking for some money as well. Have you asked him about, have you been like,

hey, I've just noticed lately you've been taking my dog. Have you brought this up with him? So it's been happening for about two years now. Oh, okay. It's gone too long. That's an issue. That makes your issue seem like nothing compared to stolen dogs being bred.

I don't know. I think I'd rather someone take my dog. It's one less thing to worry about and I don't have to worry about my washing as well. Actually, no, I love my dog. I take that back. Well, it'd be pretty hard to just pop over and steal Buster. He's a huge dog with three legs.

He's the size of a great dame. You can't really just shimmy him over the fence. But, guys, I think that's it for us. Yeah, we're done. That's us for the day. I had so much fun today. Me too. I love seeing you two.

Speaking of a great show, I'm going to segue on into our podcast that is next week. We have a really great episode dropping for you on Tuesday on Life Uncut, and it's all about sex or lack thereof. Well, it is about intentional celibacy. And that is, you know, not to do with when you're celibate because of religion. Or when just because of COVID. Yeah, or celibate because you have to be because, you know,

there's no one around to have fun with. But it's all about emotional celibacy as well. It's a very interesting chat. We had it on the podcast the other week and then one of our listeners actually wrote in and she has the wildest, wildest story. And so we decided we'd make a whole episode out of it. Yeah, because apparently, I mean, not apparently, but there are, there are a lot of benefits from withholding sex.

So we delve into that as well. So we'll see you guys on Tuesday. And don't forget, tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friends to share the love because we love love. See you next week. Miss any of the Life on Cart radio show with Britt Hockley and Laura Baird? Hear it in the Catch Up podcast on iHeartRadio.