Life Uncut - Ocean Wave, Volcano or Avalanche; Which Type Are You?

Episode Date: March 13, 2023

Hey Lifers! You might have noticed a sneaky little bonus episode drop into your feeds on Friday! We released the meaty, juicy part of today's episode on Friday to line up with Adam's media schedule! So today's episode is a bit of a laugh!First up, Laura was recognised at potentially the worst place imaginable...enter the gastroenterologist. We unpack a study that found that women have one of three types of orgasms: -The ocean wave, -The volcano or -The avalanche. We also asked you what 'thing' you got into because the person you were into liked it and our advice is steer clear of any sports that go for more than 2 hours... We got to sit down with Adam Lambert and have a big ol' chat that you can find here: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-king-of-queen-uncut-with-adam-lambert/id1472126503?i=1000603487506Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because we love love! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands were never ceded. We pay our respects to their elders past and present. Always was, always will be Aboriginal land. This episode was recorded on Darug Wollamutta land. Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. And I'm Brittany. And, well, we dropped a sneaky little bonus episode on Friday, didn't we? Didn't we?

We spent too much time together when we were finishing each other's sentence. We dropped what I, I mean, I don't think it was that original, but I felt like I came out with a really good title, The King of Queen. I thought that was pretty punny. I thought you were saying that the interview wasn't original, and I was like, speak for yourself, Britt. I thought it was pretty bloody good. I was about to introduce him, and I was like,

I was really proud that I came up with The King of Queen. I just thought it was very clever, but it's probably been used a hundred times before. But we did have the king of Queen, literally the band Queen, Adam Lambert. He did come and join us, meaning we dropped a bonus episode on Friday because we had to fit in with his touring schedule and his publicity schedule. So we went rogue and dropped Tuesday's episode a little bit early. So if you haven't listened to that, it's in the feed a couple of days ago.

We'll put a link in our show notes. But he was just amazing. I could have spoken to him. I think Laura, I think you wanted to lock him in the room. You did not want to let him out. I did. I was like, let's all go and have margaritas and be best friends. And he was like, let's not.

And I was like, okay, cool. And then we accidentally did. So I didn't tell you, producer Keisha and I, when the interview was over and we left, everyone left, it was the biggest day, right? We had been nonstop. You had to go home and get the kids. It was like 6.30. And I was like, I would murder a margarita.

No, because I hate margaritas. Who hates margaritas? It's controversial, I know. And every time I say I hate a margarita, someone comes for you. No, but you know what they say? There's no way. just taste it i'm like i'm like i've tasted it like but maybe you've never had a good one but you know what i still taste it i'm like all right maybe maybe the time has come where my taste buds

have evolved and i'll taste the margarita i never like it it doesn't matter and it's it's a shame because it's my sister sherry's favorite drink do you know what it's like it's like when a woman says i don't like anal sex and a guy says just try it just try it you'll like it it's different Oh, we'll go slow. Just let me put the tip in. We'll warm it up. Plenty of lube. It's exactly the same.

It's very similar, Laura. Yeah, identical. It's a shame because I love that we're really getting into the drink chat. It's a shame because a lot of places you go, for some reason, margaritas are like the two-for-one thing. You know when you go to a lot of bars, they're like, oh, it's happy hour. It's two-for-one margaritas. I just feel like I always miss out.

And the reason for that is because literally everybody except for Brittany Hockley loves them. So there's going to be like 10 people are going to slide into my DMs now and be like, it's not just Britta, it's me too. If you don't like margaritas, this is not a personal attack. I'm sorry. You're okay. So my main go-to.

Well, I know, Laura, yours is a margarita. You always go straight to the margie. It used to be a Negroni, but now it's a margarita because if I have one Negroni, I think I will die. I never really. They're so strong. Keisha's looking at me like, what? I will literally drink one Negroni and then I'll get blackout drunk and die.

It's, for me, nothing against Negroni. it's a strange choice of drink for you like I never would have I never would have if I was a compatibility test how well do you know Laura I wouldn't have linked you to the Negroni it used to be my number one drink did you do that because your partner at the time was a Negroni drinker because this is going to tie into something we're doing did you start drinking don't lie to me no I didn't I stopped drinking Negronis because I was getting blackout drunk but I know where we're getting to and we're steamrolling ahead but also not only are we steamrolling ahead we've Completely hijacked this intro about Adam Lambert to talk about margaritas.

Yeah, but I think that's okay. It's a really natural. Okay. So where I was going with that is I said to Keisha, I could murder an Amaretto Sour or lychee martini because they're my go-to. So we went outside to this little rooftop bar and we had just finished the record with Adam and we walk out and Adam is sitting there having a drink. And I was like, oh my God, this is so embarrassing because he thinks we've just followed him.

So I put my hand up, like I put my hand up as a barrier and I walked past him with my hands up, but purposely. I need to start laughing. We had a little drink. We said hello, but then we, it was that awkward moment where we're like, he's a superstar. We just spent two hours with him and now we're here having a drink and he thinks we've come for him, but we haven't. So we spoke and then we just went and sat at another table, but it was right next to them. And we just like waved at them the whole time. Because to be fair, he did say he was going for a drink. So he was like, why are these bitches following me? I did not hand on heart. I don't know if it's because I'm deaf.

I did not hear him say they were going for a drink. I thought they were just getting on with their publicity tour and I did not even know they were still there or I wouldn't have done it because it was so awkward. That's okay. I really enjoyed the story you put up where you were sitting across from him and he had his back to you. Because we were like, okay, we're just going to go sit over here now

and we just sat like two metres away from him because it was the only other free table there. It was pretty funny. The reason why we're telling you about this is because, so this is a bit of a different Tuesday episode. Normally our Tuesday episodes are big, thick, meaty episodes. But the core of this episode, the heart of it, the heart and soul, Adam Lambert, that was dropped on Friday.

And like Britt said, all of the links and everything else are in the show notes. So please go and listen to that after you have listened to this saucy little number and we'll figure out what it is as we go. Nah, we got some fun stuff for this episode. Do you know what? I wanted to tell you something that happened to me because it was probably the most embarrassing. I mean, it's my own little accidentally unfiltered and it's been a while since we've done an accidentally unfiltered on the podcast.

Okay, hit us. So, everyone, this is probably too much information for Yael. Is that literally not the basis of every episode we do? Yeah. You have told them about the pinky and the stinky. I think we can continue on with it. To be fair, this does have to do with my bowel movement. So, I mean, it could only get worse, to tell you the truth.

So, I have been having some issues recently. In the pooper. With my gastrointestinal area, whatever you'd want to call it. The poopy butt. Yeah, not with, not, yeah, whatever. Okay, like graphic. So I went to the doctors and I got a referral to a gastroenterologist. Is that what they're called? Correct. Gastroenterologist? Yeah. Did science. So I went to the poo doctor. Anyway, they are impossible to get into for

starters. I've been waiting for this appointment since December. I mean, if anything, that should make you feel better because there's that many people out there that are also having problems. Like, so you're not alone. No, I feel really safe in numbers. So I go into this appointment on Friday and the doctor is like this attractive, I would say like late 30-year-old guy. And a part of me like when he came out to the waiting room was like, hello, Laura Byrne, can you come in? I was like, fuck, why couldn't you just be an old man?

Like why couldn't you be so old and so like non-attractive to me? I don't want to sit in a small room and talk about my poo with you. I can see Keisha over there being like, was he single? I think I need my butt checked all of a sudden Keisha's at the doctor being like I have a lot of butt problems I need a colonoscopy so anyway Bondi Junction if anyone's interested so I yeah so I walk into the room and I sit down and you know he's lovely he's pleasant he's very

doctorly and, you know, very serious about it all. And he asked me questions, which it's so uncomfortable because you're literally describing the consistency of your poo. That's what you've got to do to this poor poo doctor. I have been there. Yes. And I was like, God, this is so awkward for me. I'm so sorry. And he's like, don't worry. I'm so used to it anyway. So I am mid describing what it is like to go to the toilet. The consistency, what you've seen. yeah and then he just has this moment where he looks at me and he goes oh I've got it and I was like what as in like me you know what's wrong with you yeah yeah and he goes I know where I know you from you were on the project you were on the project last year weren't

you yeah no that's no no not me and I was like why why did you need to say that why couldn't you just pretend like you did not know who i am like this is already as awkward as possible for me i'm talking to you about my poop so and now you're like i know everything about you so i literally yeah i literally went from being like oh so it's kind of like this shape and then i was like yeah what shape is like an octagon you know it's long and thin i was like yeah so um yeah i did a couple of fill-in spots last year like it was really fun uh yeah lisa wilkinson's really nice yep sometimes there is corn in there yep oh so it was so confusing it was honestly I don't like and this is not me being like oh I got recognized yeah I'm so popular like I never

ever get recognized by men I rarely get recognized by women and when I do it's usually like mums in the parks or young girls talking about their messed up ex-boyfriends not the hot poop doctor never have I ever been recognized by a guy and certainly not one when I was mid talking about poo well i sort of got recognized in an unfortunate moment but i don't know the unfortunate moment so on the weekend i flew up to the gold coast to see my family and i'm i mean you guys know i'm not telling you anything new but like if i have a spare second i'm facetiming ben we just we find the time you guys will leave on the phone to each other because we only have the mornings and the nights in terms of when one of us is awake anyway no one said

anything but i was facetiming at the airport and i don't know sometimes we sexy facetime like we talk something about what we're going to do sometimes just all the time we're just in conversations because you know it's really detrimental the new ear pods are so good because they're noise cancelling so you talk louder than you realize when they're in wait but so would you sexy talk when you're out in public around people well not sick but not sexy talk like we're not sexting okay but like to what level give me give me a little bit of it so maybe you'd be like oh i can't even think maybe you'd be like oh my god i can't wait to see you or like I'm so horny, whatever.

They are very different. I can't wait to see you. I am so horny. No, I can't wait to see you because there's cutesies. I can't wait to see you, miss you. But then there's like, oh, like, you know, I would never actually say this, but I would tear you apart. Wait, can you say, will you get into the horny chat when you are literally

at an airport waiting for a connecting flight? Well, I would. I'll show you what I would do, right? Just say my phone's here. I'd look around and I'd be like, I am so horny. I am going to eat you alive. And I would just like whisper it to him and we'd be like looking around really cute, you know, like just stuff like that.

But it's not common. But what I'm saying is we talk about all sorts of stuff on a FaceTime, right? So it could be fun. It could be cutesies. It could also be like we call each other – you guys know I call my dog Delilah Squid, but Ben and I call each other Squids. We're like love you, Squid. It's just a nickname.

You gave me shit the other week because I said that every so often I call Matt bub and you were like yeah but I hate bub I still hate it I hate squiddy I stand by that statement yeah squid it's funny and it's cute I don't remember what we were talking about but I got a message from a girl saying oh I recognized you I was sitting behind you on the plane but I didn't want to say anything because you were on FaceTime to Ben and I was like oh my god what was I saying and I said to Ben what were we talking about and he's like you definitely mentioned like that you can't wait to get here and I was like did she did this poor innocent girl sit on the plane because I didn't have anyone next to me how are you facetiming on a plane was this like

before no yeah okay I was like expecting like free wi-fi connection and there's Brit facetiming in the middle of the plane it made me realize that she probably just listened into a very intimate sexy conversation without me even knowing fine fine people pay for that but it made me think I need to be way more aware of walking around what I'm doing and saying on the phone and sometimes we'll both be like oh no that's too much information oh no go go you tell us what you sometimes say no sometimes he'll kill me it's not saying no sometimes like when i'm if it's in the afternoon it's when he's just woken up and so like he'll get up he'll be naked and he'll just like be going to the shower walking around and i'm a face something's just walking around naked i'm like

people could just look over my shoulder so i've got to stop doing that now and probably to give it because people come and I will bend in the nod. Anyway, that was the only time I got recognized. All right. Well, it sounds like you've had a wild weekend also. Well, speaking of sexy times, it's actually like a great unintentional natural segue. We want to talk about orgasms. Yeah.

Yeah. When was the last time you had one? It's been a while. You don't even have one on your own? In the privacy of your own home? Yes, but for me, it's nowhere near as good. Really? No way.

does not even come close why is that so you're saying if you were to do it yourself it can't even come as close you can't even get to the same level of orgasm as what sex does correct wow yeah yeah don't have that problem because i really so do you do it better on your own oh like same same same really i mean like obviously i enjoy sex more because there's a another participant in the room i should hope so but like i can get myself to as equally as enjoyable orgasm on my own yeah everyone are you all shocked like everyone in the room is looking like producer keisha are you do you need another participant laura i'm so jealous of you being able to get minor not even like 20 what if you masturbate it's not even 20 yeah yeah like 20 what about

if you're using a toy no that's what i'm doing it just doesn't hit the same like physically literally metaphorically it does not hit the same i'm really jealous of that like as a single person and I am so deeply jealous of the fact that yours are just as good on your own time. Well, trust me, as a mum of two kids, I deserve it. I deserve it. But you're also speaking to someone that will orgasm in two minutes with Matt.

Like you're just in and out. You know what it is. Well, I can make myself orgasm in two minutes. Could you do it right now? Well, not in front of you all. It's still a social experiment, like sitting here in front of the cameras. What the fuck? This is not a porno.

No, I don't want you to actually do it, but like do you feel like you could do it in any environment anywhere in two minutes? or do you need to really have worked yourself up in the day? Nah. Nah, I could do it pretty much, yeah. Wham, bam, thank you, man. I could probably go to the cubicle and do it. Like if you wanted me to go to a public toilet.

I mean, not the setting, not the atmosphere that I would normally like, but I probably could. But you could. That's what that noise was. It's perfect stress relief, guys. This is why before I record, Dolores, I could see you duck to the toilet. I thought she was having bowel issues. She's gone and nut one out.

All right, well, the reason why we're talking about this is because there was a research study that was recently done. I mean, sometimes I question where these research studies come from. Well, producer Keisha brings a lot and it is questionable. Okay, but it is around how women have different types of orgasms. Now, the reason why I thought that this was kind of, I mean, a little bit different to something that we've talked about in the past is because I think traditionally when you talk about types of orgasms,

people will think of an internal orgasm or a clitoral orgasm or I don't even know what, there's plenty of others. Well, I have always thought of the two. I've always thought you can orgasm from the clit or you can orgasm inside the G-spot that I've always thought that. Well, apparently there's different types in terms of like the way that I experience an orgasm is very different to the way that you may experience an orgasm. However, collectively they've put them into three different baskets. So three different types of orgasms. And the reason why this is so unique

is because it turns out that of these three types, each woman will experience one type of this orgasm. And it's like, that is how you experience an orgasm. And it doesn't change from time to time or relationship to relationship. It is that each person has a unique way in which their body actually goes through the motions of an orgasm. Well, the way they did this, I think it's pretty interesting. They had like a vibrated dildo thing and they got people to masturbate with it. And it recorded things like the pressure from the pelvic floor. So like the contractions and also the temperature. So they're trying to work out for each individual when they're at their climax and they're orgasming physiologically like what is actually happening because you could

still say i only orgasm from the clitoris but we still don't know what that means we don't know what the contractions are or what's happening there so this is really interesting that they had these people test it and they came down to these three categories they've put it into which is we'll go through them but the wave the volcano ocean wave oh sorry the ocean way yeah not a high on the street. It's not like a highway. The queen wave, like this circular. No, the ocean wave, the volcano and the avalanche. They are the three. Okay. So to break this down and maybe you guys can do this at home, figure out what you think you are. It's hard. The ocean wave, because the problem is they all kind of sound quite similar, but when you do actually break them down, functionality

wise, they are a bit different. So the ocean wave, the pelvic floor, it contracts and releases multiple times. So I think that this is the easiest one to understand. It's like a contraction and then it stops and then a contraction and then it stops. So it comes in rhythmic wave-like motions until it eventually subsides. So for me, I always think of this because this is definitely not my type of orgasm. I don't have like a high and then a bit of a break and then a high and then a break. And then for me, it's like it's a wham, bam, hit, and then it's done. So some people have this ocean wave-like motion or movement. There's also one called the volcano. The volcano know is one extended pelvic floor movement so instead of it being like a series of waves or

that ocean-like kind of rhythm like the coming and going of the wave yeah it's one explosive pelvic floor pressure i think you would say or like a clenching of the pelvic floor i think you could call it an eruption i think you could volcanic eruption and for some people who experience this it's like a very full body experience like all your muscles in your body will contract and then that will subside over time. And it's like almost once your body has stopped, it's like when you have that release and that relaxing motion, that's when you know that the orgasm is over. This is me. I'm a volcano. Well, to give an example, someone has said here, it feels like almost every muscle in my body tenses up as the pleasure gently intensifies.

And then there is a huge release. I know it's over when I can relax. So that's what one of the participants said the last one is the avalanche the avalanche orgasm it's sort of similar to the ocean wave in that like it is a series of pelvic floor movements but where it differs is it starts at a high point and then gradually relaxes so think of a literal avalanche you know starts at the top of the mountain rolls down so that's what this has so this person has said feels like my body starts shaking and then i suddenly explode into an orgasm my body snaps and then spasms a little bit which is a good spasm over and over again until it eventually starts to calm down before letting my muscles rest why would somebody need to know this this is my other question where

why is there ever a point in your life where you're like god i would love to know what type of orgasm i have i don't know but i'm thankful i love this content who gets paid to do this research well that's a good question but people do do you get paid to be part of the subject study is like to be the actual person in there doing the test on yourself when i lived in the uk i was super poor i went over there at 19 and i signed up to a drug test i did i was i was like how am i going to pay my bills were you masturbating for money wait that's not a science that's webcam i was yeah it was on porn hub it was really weird a lot of cameras i haven't seen the data come out for it yet but i haven't made any money either no i was with my boyfriend time

we're really poor like we used to go to this is really taking me back we used to go we lived in a van not a cute van not these traveling vans this was a moving van didn't even have windows it had a hard floor anyway we used to go to pizza hut for lunch or you can eat and take containers and steal the food and eat it throughout the week but I feel like that's everyone in their 20s totally but we signed up we were like we need money so we signed up to these literally pharmaceutical drug tests you had to go to this company and they pay it wasn't even much it was like 100 pounds and you were literally trialing drugs I'm very thankful now but at the time I was very upset. I got there one day and I had taken for my drug test trial, God knows what mutation

I would have developed if I did it. And I had taken medication that morning that I didn't know I couldn't take. So it excluded me from the trial. So I didn't do it, but my boyfriend did it. He did it. It explains a lot actually. That's why I broke up. But yeah, you do get, people do get paid for this kind of stuff. But I think when I'm looking at this, I think for me, I'm the avalanche. I think I just hit it really hard and then it comes down. Like I don't hit it. He hits it hard, but it hits hard together yeah i think i'm the avalanche start at the top and then but i also have the aftershocks as well so mine's not the one avalanche maybe you're a hybrid because you know how the avalanche goes down and sometimes it stops and then has another avalanche maybe

just a continuous avalanche and you're just someone who has multiple orgasms i think we've established that before yeah so i'm a multiple avalanche you're yeah that's what i'm saying i i'm a continuous avalanche whereas you're a one you're the volcano right yeah just one eruption It doesn't know multiple eruptions. Yeah, no, that doesn't happen. I still would like you to try that a bit more. No. I've tried.

I've tried. I swear. Everyone, this is one of those things as well. It's the margarita thing. Yeah, you know, you say you can't do it and then people go, oh, but I'll be the one to change that. And then all of a sudden you feel like your clit's getting rubbed off because they're still going for it and you're like,

it's not going to happen. Just trust me. But even within 10 seconds, even 10 seconds. Can I orgasm again 10 seconds afterwards? Yeah, that's how I do it. What? Are you kidding? No, I cannot orgasm.

No, no. If anything, it has to be like hours later and then that's a multiple orgasm. Not like within the same session. No, mine are all in the same session. Oh, no. So then for how many minutes would you orgasm? Oh, I'll get my stopwatch out next time. I'll put my Apple Watch on.

I mean, they're normal orgasms, but I could have over and over again. For how long? So like an orgasm, how many minutes or seconds does an orgasm last for you for one? Oh, I don't know. 30 seconds, a minute, maybe max. And then I could have a minute break. I feel like mine are like 20 seconds. You guys, I feel so sorry for you guys.

So wait, you will have a one-minute orgasm and then 20 seconds later you can have another minute orgasm. You are like, people need to research you. Get some probes on a dildo and use Brittany Hockley, please. No, the second and third and fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth, they wouldn't be minute long. They would be 10-second ones. Wow.

Yeah, but I could have a 20 to 30-second break and then go again. Wow. It really is a real prop up for the guy. They just think they're doing it. God's work. Anyway. Something else funny happened this week. Keisha and I, we drive to work every day basically.

Like we drive across Sydney, we can't pull. You can go in the transit lane. Keisha, yeah, we can go in the T2 lane, which I didn't even know you could not do if you're one person. Yeah. Yeah, I need to redo the road rules. Anyway, we're in the car and Keisha was saying, we'll just talk about what we're doing this week and what we've got on

and Keisha's like, oh, I'm going to the basketball tonight. I was like, you're basketball? I'm like, it sounds fun. I was like, why are you going to basketball? She's like, I love basketball. I was like, Keisha, I can't wait. We've known you for almost two years and you've never been to the basketball before. I said, oh, you've been in my life pretty consistently for 24 months.

I have not ever heard you mention basketball, spell basketball, watch basketball, go to the basketball. She's like, I love basketball. She's like, I've loved basketball for a long time. And I was like, spit it out. There's someone there that you have a crush on. there's a player you have a crush on who's giving you an avalanche keisha or there's somebody there's somebody new that you're dating that's a basketball fan i was like tell me and she goes oh you got me

it's one of the players now all of a sudden she's got this love of basketball do you know what she turned up in today basketball shorts and a jersey she's wearing she's wearing basketball shorts and she's got these big michael jordan basketball shoes on i have owned this clothing for years and also I told you guys that I used to go to the basketball every week when I lived down in Bendigo they used to give us courtside seats and we were there for the women's game and then the men's game and it was great answer the question do you or do you not have a crush on someone that plays basketball have you not in the last two years ever spoken about basketball I don't think I've spoken about it to you guys oh stop it Keisha's out there trying to slam dunk that's

She's trying to get her slender. I've got the KO games on my phone, stream it to the TV, have it on in the background. She turned up to my house this morning doing the double dribble between the legs. She brought a basketball and she was like, but it made me laugh because I know Keisha so well that I could see straight through it.

I was like, you've got to crush on someone. You've developed, even if you did love basketball when you were 12 and you were in the local team, you've re-found your love of basketball, which is fine because you have a bit of a love interest. Although, Britt, I would like to say you are not allowed to call the pot black here. The kettle, whatever that saying is. Some kettle pot black colour. Because I think it's just what happens when you have a crush on someone. A lot of people will end up absorbing their interests and their likes, which is also maybe why you're very into soccer

now, even though you've never liked soccer in your entire life. No, hang on. I'm not into, I don't go play soccer. I haven't even watched Ben actually. So no, I've definitely done it in the past and I'm only trying to watch soccer now so I can learn the rules so I can show some respect to Ben and understand when he's talking to me. Cause at the moment I'm like, I still didn't even get off side. Like I didn't even get that basic style. So we asked what thing did you pretend to be into because the person you liked was into it. So who did you try to morph into? This is something that I think a lot of people do without necessarily realizing it or like we know that someone has like likes or interests and then we just, you know, start to get into

the certain thing that they're into. Maybe it's like I dated a guy who ran like a graphic design and like experiential, it was like, he was into websites and stuff. I don't know. And I did graphic design at uni, but I've never really been into graphic design. Like I did it as a university degree. I can do graphic design, but there are people who fucking live and breathe graphic design. Like that is their calling. That is their life. And I'll, let me tell you for that four years of my life, I pretend I went to graphic design conventions. I would go to graphic design galleries. I could not give a flying fuck about it, honestly. But like I absorbed all of that. i started spearfishing i had a rob allen spear gun i even know it and i wore a weight belt

and i started spearfishing and i was a spearfisherman woman spearfisherman woman and i was petrified the whole time i was gonna get eaten by a shark i always thought something was cruel and but every time i was like oh it was such fun like we got so much fish it was the best time of my life and i had like ptsd because i was like so traumatized okay well some of these answers that you have written in are absolutely hilarious and i feel like we can all take solitude in the fact that, you know, we like to pretend like we like things so that we can be liked. It seems to be what happens. Anime. I hate cartoons, but I pretended to really love anime because he was into it. Similarly, South Park. And I had no idea how many episodes and

seasons there were. Oh, that's an annoying one. He liked sucking my toes and I pretended that I was into it. I mean, like, don't fake a kink. It's okay that you pretended to like it because he liked it so much. It's not like you were like, yeah, yeah. But then he's going to think you like it all the time. So he's going to want to whip those feet out all the time. Oh, I've got another one. Golf. I even helped him plan, set up something in his garage that he could practice, but I fucking hate golf. Cricket. The biggest regret of my life. These games go forever, sometimes days long and I would rather watch grass grow. I used to read the paper every single day and ordered multiple subscriptions because my own husband was a journalist and I wanted him to think I was up

With the news. Okay, Brazilian jiu-jitsu. It's so niche. It's so niche. Then I found myself wrestling with sweaty strangers and I had to tap out literally and metaphorically. Okay, I did jiu-jitsu as well because I was a hot guy at jiu-jitsu. I'm guilty of like all of these.

Why are we all so pathetic? Why do we do things that we hate because we want to be liked? I can actually recommend jiu-jitsu to anyone out there. stop no but let me tell you if you are single and you want to meet someone there is no better way it is close combat you wrestle men they put their legs around your head how cool are full-grown men that are into jujitsu yeah but men no it's actually so hot and the men and the women wrestle each other you don't just have to wrestle women so i went and i was like on the ground grappling with the hottest sweatiest men so if you're single go and do it okay trekking i fucking hate walking

church i even used to raise my hands during the worship but i had no idea what it meant and what was going on yeah i had a little bit of period of time where i went back to church because i liked a guy i forgot about that youth group i went to youth group did you for a guy in my 20s yeah youth group in your 20s aren't you too old i must have been 18 i just finished school yeah youth group i was 30 i didn't know what was wrong with it but they said it was a problem tattoos clearly a lifelong regret because i've got lots that i don't even like that's a shitty one because that's dumb the regret stamped into your skin yeah and the laser costs money to get

rid of it and it hurts and it's long term last one for me camping now we've spent so much money on equipment and i actually hate not having power or phone reception that's fair that's a big one and i reckon that's a common one yeah pretending that you're into camping that also sucks because that takes up so much of your holidays, but all you want to be in is in a nice resort with a pina colada by a pool. Camping is really hard work. People think you just go and like put a tent up. You don't because I grew up in a camping family. I didn't stay in a hotel until I was 17. Like we were campers through and through. It's a lot of effort because you've got to take every single thing you possibly need. You've got to erect it, keep it clean, keep the bugs out,

sleep on the ground, cook your own food. It's a lot. Yeah. So I understand, but I think there'd be a lot of people that would want to bond with their partner over it this has got to be the best one I developed a fake love for unicycles and bagpipes what bagpipes who wakes up one day and says oh my god I also love to play the bagpipes or just listening to bagpipe music yeah just putting on Spotify and unicycles do you want to go for a ride I do love a unicycle let me let me sit on my pogo stick on one wheel that I just so happen to also love Oh, dear. Look, I mean, we are all guilty of this, but if you are truly taking on things that you hate to try and impress somebody, it may be an indication that they're not your person.

Also, you're allowed to have differences. Let them have their unicycle. Yeah, it's good to have alone time. It's good to have independent hobbies. Okay, well, this episode, I mean, like we said, normally our Tuesday episode is our big and meaty one. But if you have come to the end of it and had a giggle, then it is time to go and have a listen to Adam Lambert's interview, which we dropped on Friday. It's episode number 18. Keisha's looking it up. I think it's, look, it's just not the last one. Cause that's the pickup. Just Google Adam Lambert. Go and have a listen. It's a bloody good interview. There's so many parts of this that I loved. I loved what an incredibly humble person he is, how generous

he was with his time. Honestly, I know you make jokes about it, Britt, saying that I was trying to trap him there, but we couldn't get rid of him. We couldn't like, he just wanted to be there and to give and he gave such to the questions that were asked he gave such thoughtful answers and I think sometimes when you meet such superstar celebrities you expect that they're going to be standoffish you expect that they're going to be high maintenance well you also expect that they have their answers ready to go that are standard that are the same for everybody but I didn't feel that without him I felt like he was really digging deep and giving us very specific individual answers he told us some things where he's like I haven't actually said that before he was very

generous with his information and his time and we loved it yeah and it was everything we covered everything from his sexuality from his relationship with his family with his parents we covered how he got into his music career but then also that transition from going from being this huge reality tv star off the back of american idol into his now position as the frontman lead singer for queen it is an amazing story he's an amazing man and we'd love it for you to go listen to it keep all your questions your confessions your accidentally unfiltered everything else coming into our instagram life uncut podcast and if you haven't jumped onto apple reviews and given us a shaky little review well then you are a scallywag and it's time to go do that we would love you for it

and you know the drill tell your mom tell your dad tell your dog tell your friends and share the love because we love love We'll see you next time.