Life Uncut - Offcuts: Men Are Ditching Deodorant, Michelle Obama's Empty Nest Truth & An Open Relationship Gone Wrong

Episode Date: September 11, 2026

Hey Lifers! Welcome to Offcuts, your little snackkk to get you through to Monday!  Poppy is almost one (how?!) and Lola has entered a bold new era of toddler rage, informing Laura in no uncertain terms that she will, in fact, "kill her dead." Then it's time for our regular check-in on what men are doing to themselves online: this week it's "pheromone maxing" (also known as: refusing to wear deodorant), and a new frontier of self-grooming madness. We are begging them to stop. We also unpack a viral clip of Michelle Obama on her podcast IMO, where she got refreshingly honest about how she actually feels now that her kids have left home. Spoiler: she's thriving, not grieving and it's sparked a very real debate about who's "Team Barack" (misses the kids desperately) and who's "Team Michelle" (has never felt more free). Then, a Reddit thread that reads like poetic justice: a woman opens up her relationship at her boyfriend's request, racks up hundreds of dating app matches… while he gets zero. Naturally, he's furious. We close out with the most petty, most brilliant piece of revenge we've heard in a long time… a woman who signed her best friend's cheating ex up to 500 email newsletters, and we've got some upgrade ideas of our own. Keep your questions coming! Slide into the Life Uncut DMs at @lifeuncutpodcast on Instagram You can watch us on Youtube Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Hosted by Britt Hockley & Laura Byrne Produced by Lachy Pugsley Video Produced by Vanessa Beckford & Lachy Pugsley Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncutt. I'm Brittany. I'm Laura. How many times did that take you, Britt? Three times. Only because you weren't happy. That's not true. I was happy with the first one. But there just needed more energy, more passion, more energy. This is off cuts where we give you your snack for the weekend, just the little bits that you miss from the week to get you through until Monday. We want to send you on your way this weekend feeling sprightly and happy, which is, to be fair, I feel very happy. But you know what's been happening in my house?

I couldn't possibly guess. Poppy? Can you believe she's almost one year old? I actually can't. It's this year and I know that this is the most mundane. Just fucking absolutely boring thing to say this year has gone so far. Time flies. Time really.

I'm just flying. No. I feel like it's fucking September. This year has just absolutely flown by. And I realized it this morning when I was like, I get Poppy out of her little cot and I put it down, change a napy in the mornings. and she's smiling at me and she has cut both of her two top teeth, which also explains why last week was such a hellhole with her being sick, quote-unquote.

So she was sick, but she was also like, growing teeth is hard work. It does blow my mind and not to take away from that, chat. You don't want to talk about her teeth anymore? To make this about me. Did you grow some teeth as well, Britney? No, talking about how quickly time's gone, can you believe my wedding was one year and three months ago? Like, that to me feels like yesterday. Yes, no.

your wedding feels longer than that to me. Your wedding feels like five years ago. Doesn't even feel like I had my year anniversary yet. Really? No, it feels so quick and I don't have kids that's making time fly. I don't know what mine is. Yeah, it's weird because I, like I said, I feel like there's no way Poppy could be one, but at the same time I was pregnant at your wedding. Anyway. Yes. Which is in time. Such a weird thing to unpack. Welcome to Offcutts where we have really, really basic thoughts. Sorry, I want to say something. Speaking of basic thoughts, I know how late to the party I am with what I'm about to say. Oh, just don't say it then.

No, I want to because it really took a stranglehold on me. Oh, fuck. Sometimes, and there's got to be some psychology behind this, and I don't know what it is. Oh, we definitely won't unpack the psychology. Because if you've come here for anything highbrow, you're not getting it today. Sometimes when something's trending or it's the talk of the town or it's all everyone's... What are you saying? Listen, I'm trying to explain.

Sometimes when something is such hot property, like a TV show or something. something like that. I don't know what it is, but I just won't watch it. That's how I felt about the Alex Earl and Alex Cooper thing. Like, I fucking can't bring myself to watch it because everyone was talking about it. No, I'm talking about bigger things. Like, I'm talking about like Lord of the Rings. Never, never seen it. Avatar, never seen it. Game of Thrones. Didn't see it. Fight Club. Didn't see Fight Club? Didn't see Fight Club? No. I haven't seen all the others, but I haven't seen Lord of the Rings or, but Fight Club is good. Watch that. I don't know why I do it. Recently, everyone has been talking about off-campus.

Did you watch it? No, you know, I haven't seen it, but you are so sucked. I don't know you haven't seen it? Yeah, we talked about it on the plane on New Zealand. Oh, because I was frothing it. You were like watching these 14-year-olds get hot and heavy, and I was like, I'm not about it. No, that's Sterling Point. That's a new show.

Oh, sorry. I don't know what the fuck's happening. Sterling Point is actually also produced by Margot Robbie. Anyway, off campus. I finally watched it. Now, it was the hottest property worldwide in the last, I don't know, six months. I don't know how long has been out for, not that long. It's so good.

I'm sorry. I know I'm late. Laura, you need to watch it. There is something about watching coming of age, college kids, find their feet, find love, work it out. It's romantic. There's an Aussie, Josh Houston in it who absolutely kills it and his profile has just skyrocketed. It's the relatability piece. You know, you're not the only person. I've had so many people be like, have you watched it? It's amazing. How have you not watched it? I just, I don't have time. I'm all about one episode kind of commitments. It's one of those things that it makes time. Like, you will find the time. It's actually quite wholesome.

I can't explain it. And I know everyone listening right now is like, fucking welcome to the club, Brittany. But I, if someone can unpack A, the psychology behind why I do that. But B, if you haven't seen off campus, if you are like Laura or myself, go and watch it. So the thing I am desperate to unpack with you all, but unfortunately we're recording this in the middle of the day on Wednesday, right? Which means that tonight is the Traders finale episode. And I am on the fucking edge of my seat.

I absolutely am devastated. this is not being recorded tomorrow because it's the only thing I want to talk about. It's taking up so much of my brain space. I never thought I would enjoy Australian traders as much as I have. You know that would give you access to watch it in advance to promote it on the podcast. I watch traders before it launched. I watched it. Maybe it's because I don't ever ask for anything.

No, I want to watch it when everyone else does. I want to be one of the people. Yes, but I think for these moments, it would be good. That's true. But yes, I'm booked as well. The only other update I have for you before we get into all the things that we've been talking about in the group chat this week. is Lola and I know I'm going back to kids. We're going back to her teeth.

Fucking hell. Save it for the main end. Lola also grows to Grissomolas. No. No. I had a really hard night last night, Britt. Really hard. I have no doubt because every night's on it.

No. Last night was a hard one. And it's because I've talked about it on my socials a little bit. Lola at times likes to tell me that she hates me. She's very disregulated. She has very big emotions. If something doesn't go her way, she hates me. I hate you.

And you're like, cool. Thanks. She's flipped over into a new category of offensiveness. Last night, she did something that was, I don't even know what she did, to be honest, but Matt was like, no books. You're going to bed. So, annoyingly, like, I came in to do, like, the bedtime routine. Matt had obviously had some encounter with Lola. He's like, you're not getting books tonight, but I'm the one that does the book. So then I'm the one that had to, like, enact the punishment for her. So he was like, you're not getting books. And then he left. And I was like, oh, well, fuck, I guess I'll do with this. Anyway, so I'm like, sorry, honey, you can't have books. Dad said no books. Like, we're not having

books tonight. And she goes, I want you to die and I will kill you. Oh my God. This is fucked. And then for five minutes, she talked about how much she hates Matt Nye and how she wants us to die and she's going to kill us. She actually says, I'll kill you dead. I'm going to kill you dead, mommy. I'm no psychologist, Laura, surprisingly, but that's not normal. I'm pretty sure saying your child's going to kill you is not normal. I don't think she actually knows what it means. She knows what kill you dead me. She doesn't because then when I explained to her, I was like, you know, when you say that, that means you can never see mummy again. Mommy and Daddy will never be here again. And then she started crying and she was like, I don't want you to go anywhere.

Don't murder me in my sleep then. She's off her head. I'd keep my eye on that. Put some locks on the door on the outside. Yeah, she creeps in the night time just lurks over the bed in the dark, staring at us with a knife. Strangeer things have happened. You did say she's disregulated. She's very dysregulated. Anyway, my kid wants to kill me. She wants to kill me dead. I love that, who. I'd be not sleeping in your house. All right, it is time to get into all the shit that we have been sharing in our content, WhatsApp group chat that didn't quite make it into the main episode.

And this is, I really like a title of this, men, men, men, what the actual fuck. Every month or so we bring up just like what men are doing in the world of like maxing, whether it be, what was the looks maxing. Looks maxing, penis maxing, jaw maxing. There's all different kinds of maxing. And there's a new one that's like hit the world. And it's pheromone maxing, which if you haven't heard of this, basically it's like men now. There's a movement of them online.

They're not wearing deodorant. They refuse to do anything about their own bodily sense. Because apparently our pheromones, no one's out there for the lynx Africa. We're all there to try and sniff an underarm and it's going to make us be drawn to them and their manliness. Well, there's actually some signs behind it. Is Link's Africa still around? I don't know, probably. It had a strangle hold on us.

I'm sure it is. Oh my God. It was so hot. Like when someone walked past with Lynx Africa, you were like, that's hot. Because it was the only smell anyone could afford when we were like 17. or dupe. I'm not sure about the jupe one. Anyway, I understand a tiny bit of where this is coming from, but not the fact that they're not showering for days, they're not wearing deodor and they're trying to fucking stink their day down. I don't get that. I understand because smell is a really powerful thing. Smell's very emotive. Smell can turn you on.

Smell can take you back to a memory in time. Like, it is a real thing. But that's only when that memory had been created in the past. I'm telling every man that's listening right now that is pheromone maxing, you are feral maxing. I don't know, though, because some... You love a smelly man. Yeah, I love a smelly boy. Man, not a boy. Fuck. You love a man.

No, some men don't stink like me. Oh, sometimes men who don't have deodorant or whatever, they just smell like a man and it's hot. No, that's not men that don't wear deodorant. That's men that put deodorant on, work to full day and have just that normal musky hard working smell. They still had deodorant on. There's just a bit of sweat on top. I like a little bit of hardworking smell. Hey, I know, no, we joke about this, but you guys remember Vabbing? Do you remember what Vabbing is? Oh yeah, the vaginal juice. Yeah, so like, I know we are paying. Yuck. Sorry if you just turned off the podcast because Brutney's disgusting. It's basically this

social media viral trend that took a stranglehold last year. Everyone was talking about it. And there were women on TikTok talking about how they were vabbers. And basically they were getting their vaginal excretions and then discharge. Discharge. Yeah, so I say juice and you call excretions. And they were dabbing it on their neck and behind their ears and stuff like a perfume because apparently the pheromones of that was supposed to attract the opposite sex or like whatever.

We're doing some weird shit on social media at the moment and we need to stop. And every week there is something new and someone is pushing the boundaries in a direction that they shouldn't be pushed. Yeah, the other thing that they're doing in terms of like these trends and men, men, men, and there's now men that are shaving their eyelashes off. Because they think their eyelashes are too feminine. Yes. They're shaving.

Sorry. Do people not realize that your eyelashes serve a purpose? They're there to protect your eyes. Do they really, though? I remember being in primary school, and there was a girl who I went to primary school with, and she individually pulled out every single eyelash from her eye. She did not have a single eyelash on her face.

And I remember looking at her and thinking, wow, like that was such an unusual thing to, voluntarily choose to do. Obviously, there's conditions and reasons why people's eyelashes fall out. It's a lot of stress and anxiety response as well. I don't know if she was anxious or stressful. I think she just decided. She pulled her eyelashes out. Well, there's also that thing. It's called Trichor, Trichita. I don't know, whatever. It's where you pull your own hair out. I do that when I'm stressed. I pull out my own hair. Yes, that's my point. Like, she's not doing it for fun. But yes, your eyelashes serve an absolute purpose. They're not just there to look good, but they

block dirt and dust getting to your eye. They can block like soften harsh lights. they can keep moisture into your eyes. How often are you in a dusty place where you're like, thank God for my eyelashes. You actually don't realize if you had no eyelashes, how much you'd have in your eye. I have never looked at myself in the mirror and being like, fuck my eyelashes are dusty. Thank God they caught all that. Well, they don't catch the dust, you nerd. I'm just like gobsmacked by this other than the fact that there's actually a picture of him shaving them off.

Do men not realize that women love men with eyelashes? Like there is nothing hotter than a man with beautiful eyelashes. I just like a hairy man. Hair in general. Yeah. I like full all hair. I don't need manicured hair on a man. Matt loves to shave his chest.

Ben loves a shaved chest. And it is the deep bane of my existence because there is nothing sexier when he's got a full hairy chest. It's a really sad day when Matt comes downstairs and he does it all sheepishly. He comes downstairs from the bathroom and he's like got no shirt on and he's got a fucking shave chest. And he knows what I'm like, why did you do it? It's frustrating when you say to them, like, I'm telling you this is attractive to me.

Like, you'd get laid more if you were hairy and they still don't choose it. Because it's not about what I want. Yes, it is. His whole life is about what we want. And as soon you get on board with that, boys. No, he thinks it's itchy to have full grown hairy chest. So I understand why he prioritises what's more comfortable to him in the same way. I also prioritise what's more comfortable to me.

You don't prioritize anything. We've seen that bush. Exactly. And that would prefer probably the opposite. But he takes what he can get at this point in the relationship. But don't you think beautiful long eyelashes on a man is hot? Sure. I've never really thought about eyelashes on a man.

I don't really care. Take them or leave them. If you would not, no, bullshit, I'm calling bullshit. If you went on a date with someone I had no eyelashes, not because they had no hair, but because they shaved them off, you would not be into that. Maybe 10 years ago you would have been. There's no way you'll take them or leave them.

That's the dumbest thing I've heard you say ever. Like bullshit. Do you want to double down on that? or have you changed your tune? If Matt came downstairs with no eyelashes. You're not going to be like, yes. So madly. I'd be like, take it, we'll leave him, I guess.

No, you'd leave him. You'd be like, back my back. Quick change of pace. I want to take you to the wonderful Michelle Obama. I love her. I just feel like she can do no wrong in my eyes. She was always a dream guest for the podcast. Maybe she'll hear this conversation.

So on a recent episode of her own podcast, IMO, which is in my opinion, which is a podcast where she talks about her opinions. Thank you, Britt. She does it with her brother Craig and they have guests on. And so in this particular clip, she has a guest on called John Stewart. Now, she was talking about parenting and she said something that has ended up being quite controversial and quite divisive. Have a listen. Kids being around is so incredible.

I don't. I love them. I'm going to see them tonight for dinner. I love them. But, you know, Barack cried when they went to college. I was like, bye, little. Goodbye. Now Friday nights aren't wrecked with terror and fear about where are you?

Where are you? Right. I love their emancipation and growth. The thing I miss, though, is the job. Like, don't you miss? See, your kids are still in high school, so it's still a job. Yes. It gave a meaning and, like, pattern to my life.

I'm good. I look at all this meaning. She's different. She's different. I have a wonderful pattern. Oh, man. I love my kid's schedule. I love it.

Yeah, there's something about the schedule. I love my schedule. I have a great schedule. And it's all mine. So just in case you miss what this chat was about, it was about your kids leaving home. So her girls have both grown up. They went off to college. And they were just talking about how the different reactions between her and Barack, he was

Debo, he cried. He needs them, misses them, wants them. And she was like, fuck, yeah. I feel like I've got my life back. Doesn't mean I don't love? them, but she's stoked. And I think there's two kind of parents. And what we're seen in the comments and on the internet is the same thing. You're either team Barack and this other guest or your team Michelle. I think it's a tricky one because we have been led to believe as parents that when your

kids leave home, your life lacks meaning. Right? Like it's like this idea that like once you're an empty nest, you want to get your time back, you want to get agency. And then once they're gone, you're left in the silence, sad and lonely. Well, some people are. Dreaming of your children. I know. And I think it depends on how you've parented throughout your entire life. Like if your entire existence throughout your kid's teenage years has just been them, has been like carding them from sport to sport to like things on the weekend and every single thing about your life is their life, then yeah, that's going to hit a whole lot harder. But I actually love that there's someone like Michelle Obama being like, no, you know what? My kids have left home. I know I did a great job

as a parent. They are capable, able. They are adults that can make their own decisions. They have agency and my life still has purpose. My life still has meaning now that they've gone. I think that there's something really powerful in that side of the conversation because all we hear for mums is that it's the opposite. All we hear is that they leave and your life lacks meaning now. And then you just wait to be a grandma. All of us, oh, and I'm just desperately waiting to now be a grandma because my kids have gone. Well, I don't want to take that away from a lot of people. A lot of people do do that. They live to be a parent. They love being moms. They love being dads. They can't wait to be grandmas. And that is the purpose that they find in their life and there's nothing wrong with that.

I don't think I'll ever fall into that category. My parents didn't fall into that category. My parents raised four of us all very close together. We're all about 18 months apart. And as much as they love us and like they love doing family things, I think they couldn't wait to get out the door. And I think it's very similar. My dad, I think probably struggled a little bit more than my mom.

And I would love to have them listen to this and tell me. My dad was probably like Barack in this where he missed that. family time, et cetera, et cetera. And my mom was like, thank fuck. The logistics are over. And I think this comes down to a bit of a gender thing. Women, generally speaking, carry more of the mental load. They're doing more of logistics.

Totally. They're planning everything they need for school and for sport. And they're planning when they need vaccinations and doctors appointments and more clothes and school camps and how to get into uni. Do they fill out their university application? Like it is also women loaded. And half the time the men do as they're told. And I know this is generally speaking, but I think that's also why

there's a different kind of relief coming from Michelle to Barack. Well, it's generally speaking, but it's also of this generation. Like, you know, I think things are slowly shifting in our generation, but Michelle having adult children, that generation was. And she, you know, her husband was the fucking president of the United States. She's the first lady. She's doing a lot of the stuff in the actual house, you know, and I guess like that's the reality.

I think the reason why I think that these conversations are important is because they're the leveler, they're the balancer. We have been led to believe that your life will lack purpose once your kids leave. For a lot of people, what you may find is more time. And by finding more time, you might actually find a little bit of your own self-interest again if you're not spending half the day doing 3,000 loads of washing. I just think that maybe it's the antidote having these conversations. And I get, like, it's so easy for a dad who maybe was doing the weekend runs of football,

soccer, but still got to have and manage his own career to be like, oh, I really miss the kids not being at the house. But the mum who was doing dinners every night and up early in the organisation, like, I don't know. I wonder how I will feel once my kids move out. I will absolutely miss having little kids because I love being a mum to little kids. But I think life takes on different seasons. And it would be interesting to know, like if anyone listens to this and they are in the season of life where their kids, they're an emptiness, their kids have left home, did you feel like you found a sense of liberation or found a

sense of yourself again? For all the conversations I've had with moms who had kids really young, so like I have friends who are in their 40s, who had their children early 20s. So their kids are now 22, 23, 24 years old. I have the same. At university, moving out of home, or they still live at home, but they're like, have way more agency. The version that I hear from them is not that they're at home wallowing and the fact that their kids aren't little. They are fucking 45 and they are out living life and being like, you know what, I'm not at home with my kids. I'm Pilates. I've got hobbies. I've got friends. I'm going on a holiday to Greece. Like, they are living life. And I think we have been told once again that as moms and as mothers, you are a martyr to your children.

And I think that maybe their conversation's changing and people like Michelle are changing that. I also think it's a bit of a cultural lifestyle shock as well. It's like, I mean, say your kids fly the cupid 18, 19, 20. For 20 years, you have been a bit of a quote unquote slave to your child. Like you are there to serve them. And I don't mean you're serving them, but. I mean, my child wants to kill me dead. So I am a slave to my kids.

Exactly. It's quite a thankless job, as you've said before, Laura, and sometimes it can be unsafe. It's a quite unsafe, thankless job. But I think when you haven't had the time or capacity to think about who you really are, what you really want to do, what you would do if you had spare time, like a lot of women stop dreaming about that because it's unfathomable. Then all of a sudden when your lifestyle has this drastic change and you don't have to rush home to get your kid to school, you don't have to cook for anyone else other than you, you don't have to think of anything else. I imagine that is a real shock to the system that takes some time for people to adjust. I agree. I agree. I also do think it's an age thing. So when you say, laws, you know, you've got friends that have kids flying the coop now at our age, I also do.

And I think that's because, and I'm not saying you can't do the same things when you're older, but I think you have more drive to do them when you're young. So if you're still only like 40 and your kids are flying the coop, you still have the desire and the energy and the compassion to start a new career, to do a spontaneous trip to Europe, whatever else it is. She was in her 60s now, so she's 62, and I love that she's still feeling that. But I think for a lot of other people, maybe when you're in your 60s and your life becomes free, like if I have kids now at nearly 40, well, I'll be 40, right?

If I have a child in the next year, my kids will only be leaving when I'm 60. Am I going to have the will to start a new career at that age? Or am I going to be like, oh, I just want to wind down now. So I think it's definitely age as well. I agree, but it's also the same trajectory as me. Like I had Poppy at 40. That's when she was born, just before my 40th. birthday. I don't know. I disagree because I think if you speak to a lot of 60 year olds,

they don't feel any different at 60. Like, I'm sure age catches up with you at some point in time, but there's a lot of 60 year olds out there that are like, fuck, I know I'm 60, but like I still feel like I'm 30. Like I keep coming back to this idea that, you know, maybe for some people, your entire life purpose is just to be a mum or just to be a parent. But for a lot of people, it's not the only reason why you're put on this earth. And I think that our generation of parenting is still maintaining a little bit of self where they can. And if you are in the trenches with little babies and little kids right now, you might not feel like you have any sense of self. But as they get older, you will have the opportunity to be able to claw some of that back. And I think it's

really important to try and claw some of it back so that one day when they do move out of home, you can still recognize yourself when you're not caring for somebody else all the time. I do love that somebody as respectable and influential and powerful as Michelle Obama is saying some of the things that are generally left unsaid because most women feel like they can't say those things out loud because they'll be shunned or they'll be judged or they'll be crucified. And it's not like she's said anything bad. But that quote alone, if you take her quote,

I won't miss my kids without context. It sounds pretty intense. But I love that she's like, hey, it doesn't mean I don't fucking love them, but I have my time back. And she's quite normalising something that most people wouldn't say. Totally. And what I love is all the women who are in the comments being like, fucking agree.

Yeah. I came across this Reddit thread this week. and it was the best, I don't even know if you'd call it a fuck you moment, but it was the best kind of like, ha ha, told you so. Sometimes the grass is not always greener is what I think that this is the lesson we can all learn from this. So the details around this was like a woman was in a committed relationship and her partner propositioned her to wanting to open up the relationship. It wasn't what she wanted. It wasn't what she desired. But she felt as though he needed it to stay in the relationship and so she decided to explore it. Have a listen to this.

My boyfriend is mad at me because he opened up our relationship, but he got no dates. How do I respond to this? Me and my boyfriend, who are both 37, have been dating for just over three years. Prior to this, I was single for eight. Overall, it's been a pretty healthy relationship. We both have independent jobs and living situations. However, something startled me, which was about six months ago. He came to me and said that he wanted to open up our relationship, meaning going on dates and sleeping with other women. Now, I've never been in a dynamic like this before, so I naturally had a lot of questions around it. He told me that I could also go on dates and sleep with other men. How generous. Yeah, so kind. That's what an open relationship

what a kind guy. I honestly was a little skeptical at first, but after doing some research and having some time to think about it, well, I agreed. He had told me that if at any point I wasn't comfortable that we could stop and we could close a relationship up again, one of the rules was we don't discuss with each other what we are doing and who we're going out on dates with. Now, she goes on to say, I'm going to summarize this part, but basically she signed up to a dating app had no problem matching. Like matches upon matches upon matches. And so she started going on dates, one to two a month. She like, you know, regularly would meet up with people, very non-committal.

She made it very clear to them that she was in an open relationship. She was having sex. And, you know, she, now, she didn't tell her boyfriend about all of the dates, but he knew that she was going out with some people. And she goes on to say this. I was at my boyfriend's house the other day. And my phone was on the kitchen counter. He saw my notifications and then proceeded to go through my phone and read my messages,

including going through the dating app and whatnot. To say he was angry was an understatement. Turns out he opened our relationship up to go on a date with a younger colleague at his workplace, who misread the idea of his date as just a work lunch. He wanted to see if it would work with her because I think what he wanted was to leave me to be with her. In the last six months, he's had a few rough dates, but no one additional to sleep with. I feel somewhat embarrassed for him. He demanded that we instantly close the relationship up,

and I told him that maybe we should just well end things. or at least take a break. He was outraged. He called me names, but he was the one who wanted this dynamic in the first place. I left and as I was walking home, I contemplated fully breaking it up with him. He has been blowing my phone up and I'm not quite sure what to say now. I'd say, see ya. How absolutely outrageous. And you know what? I think that there's a lot of cases for and against open relationships. But this is a very real situation where the person who decides or brings the idea of opening up a relationship may not find themselves as desirable in an open relationship world as what the other person is and what the other person is doing.

She had 500 matches and he had zero. I know, but I also think that that happens, right? There's so many, because there's so many men out there. I'm talking about heterosexual relationships firstly. This is only ever going to be more beneficial for the woman, I would say, if you are starting point blank. No, because there's not as many women out there that want to be in open relationships or want to like dabble as what there are men.

There's so many men who are more open to casual sex. So like the numbers were always going to be there for her, I think. Oh. Well, it does sound like he was just really vibing himself with this co-worker and he was misreading some signals. He probably didn't even want to open the relationship. He just wanted to be with this one woman. I would be so fucking quick out of this relationship, especially now that he's realized the

grass isn't greener. No one wants him. Like literally zero people. him. Why do you still want him? And now he's angry at you for that. Like, his response speaks volumes. I would be so quick out of that relationship if I were you, because I don't think that this person now is the person you were with three years ago. Yeah, I think that that's definitely. I answer this like it's an ask on car. I know. But like, I find it really interesting. I remember it's really hard because like I think that open relationships sometimes get a bad rap. And we've done

loads of interviews in the past with people who have navigated open relationships. up until the point where they have or haven't worked. And sometimes if you are someone who has only ever been in a traditional monogamous relationship and then you hear about someone being in an open relationship and then at some point they close it again or it doesn't work, sometimes I think the reaction is to be like, ha ha, see, it never works. It doesn't work out. But so many relationships don't work out.

It's not that it's an impossibility. I just think in this instance, you've got to really understand the why is somebody wanting to open up the relationship, like really understand. like really understand like what is it that they're wanting to get out of it and have very clear rules. And I guess ultimately, unfortunately, it may be a situation where one person has more access to and is able to navigate open relationships more easily than the other person. Right, you've got no Riz. You could not pull one single chick.

And he's just fucking jealous. It's so. You've got no Riz. Do you know I only learned Riz recently what it stands for? I knew what it meant, but you know what it's. for. What does it stand for? Out of charisma. Like, re-ish. Yeah. I knew what it was, but I'm too old for it, babe. So, so zied. I think I learned it off off campus. You know you've got no Riz if you need to explain the meaning behind Riz. So I just knew that you would value that explanation. Thank you.

I did. This is so funny to me. I don't have any problem with open relationships. I think they're great. I think this chick needs to ask herself how she feels being with other people now because she probably never imagined it. Now she has seen it. She's seen what's out there and she's seen the small dick reaction from her boyfriend. Yeah. Play on Queen. That's That's what I'd say. And now we knows how grim it would be out there. He'd be like, fuck. Like, I can't ever be alone.

That's what you think. Yeah. How embarrassing. All right, the last thing I became obsessed about this week, this is a post from a woman who's named local host Barbie. And it's all about the revenge that she enacted on her best friend's ex because he cheated on her, right? Like, she found out her best friend's ex had been cheating and she thought, I'm going to

take matters into my own hands. I'll show you. Have a listen to this. My best friend got cheated on by a man who gave me. barely read, so I thought I would give him some new reading material by signing him up for 500 email newsletters. I started by making a list of political parties, religious organizations, and e-commerce brands. This includes hair loss product in women's rights organizations since he loves other women so much. Then I created a bot that goes to each website and automatically

registers his email. We hope this gives him some new reading material other than the text that he gets from other girls. What a fucking fantastic use of AI. But not really, because he's just not going to read them. It's like he can get sent them, but he can't read. So he's just going to play on. He can read. There is nothing more infuriating than getting copious amounts of spam emails and then your actual emails that you need to read, being buried within the world. Do you know how hard it would be to unsubscribe from that many emails? I love the petty inconvenience that this is going to cause him. I love it. I agree. I love her enthusiasm. I think she could have gone harder. Like what? Any kind of revenge. Like,

you stole your ex's passport. Like that's the shit we're talking about. I didn't steal his passport. That's not true. This story hasn't evolved over the years. The story has taken on a life of its own. Didn't you break into his house and set it on fire? Isn't that where the story went?

That's exactly what happened. I stole all of the contents of his house. Buster was his dog. Yeah, that's true. That's true. He's still trying to get him back. No. That's not what happened.

I just went and took a photo of it and forged his signature on some travel documents. So so above board. So that my girlfriend could come to the Philippines. with me and I could cancel his ticket. Yes. Great. That's it. Great.

That was it. So when he showed up at the airport, the tickets weren't in his name anymore. Yes. He was a piece of shit. I love that kind of revenge. Yeah. I have regret for not performing bigger revenge in the class. I agree.

I agree. You are not petty enough for it. I'm not petty at all. I think you need find the pity in your bones. I actually don't give a fuck. I do. I love it. It feels me.

If Ben cheated on me now, like as my friends, like what would your revenge be? I would do something like that. Would you? The problem is is, I feel like I can't do anything to, elaborate these days because it would end up in daily mail. Yeah, and we'd get into trouble. Look, I love this, but I also think that we are in the dawn and the era of technology. Like, AI is everywhere. You could set up a bot that continuously subscribes him to people's newsletters from all over the world. Imagine if you find out your partner's cheating on you and your revenge is not just like

one-time-only subscription of 500 very inconvenient newsletters. It is an ongoing every single day. They are getting signed up, signed up, signed up, signed up, spam the fuck. fucking shit out of that man. If he enjoys receiving messages from girls, you make sure he receives so many messages. It's so funny. I'm like, not all heroes wear capes. I'm just the bigger person. I am. I know. I know you all vomiting in your mouth. I do not have the energy. If something happens, I sit with it and deal with it in the moment and then I fucking move on. Like, I'm really good at not lingering. I don't think about it. And I'm like, the best revenge is just me never fucking thinking about you again. You can see how much hotter I'm going to get because I'm going to work so

hard. Like, you know, you know, revenge bod and like, you're like, I'm going to have a revenge glow up. Every woman I know that has broken out with someone ends up just living their best life. Mine was the opposite. You know when everyone's like, oh, revenge glow up and like you go to the gym and you get really skinny and fit and ripped and stuff afterwards? Mine was the opposite. I just got like normal again. I was so, well, I did because when I was in a relationship and I was so depressed, I was like, if I'm really skinny and I'm really fit and I'm as hot as I possibly can be, he probably won't cheat on me. Like I was like so too. toxicly the opposite way when I was in the relationship that when we broke up I was like,

oh, hold on, I don't have to starve myself to be loved. That's a weird concept. But that's also a glow-up. You got like mentally healthy, physically healthy. Like, that is you living your best life. It's one of those examples where just because the way someone looks doesn't mean that they're actually in the best headspace. The other part of this as well, I know that you say, Britt, like the best form of revenge is living a happy life. It is. Live, love, love. It is. Life, live, Love, live, whatever. But I love petty revenge and I'm here for it. And if you guys want to come and share your little petty revenge stories with me,

I am all fucking ears because I truly think that sometimes people deserve a bit of pettiness in their life. I love living vicariously. Like, I love hearing your guy's stories of petty revenge. I just can't be fucked. I personally don't have it in me. I just want to play on. All right.

Well, this is the call out for this week. Send me your petty revenge stories. I must. I need to know. And we'll talk about them next week. And anyway, guys, that is it from us. ask, have the best weekend, everyone. Rock on, guys. Rock on to that weekend.

You rock on with your Saturday. You fucking rock right into the weekend and all the way through to your Monday. Get it, fam. We're going to see you back here on Monday. Keep your ask and cuts coming in. Your accidentally unfiltered's coming in. Your ask and cut aftermath's coming in. If we've ever answered your question or your friend's question and there has been any kind of a resolution, please let us know. And please go and join the Facebook discussion group if you haven't already because that's where all the good stuff goes there. Also, the YouTube, lots of clips on the YouTube, long, shorts, mediums, get amongst it. And you know the drill.

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