Life Uncut - Push It Real Good! Preparing For Poppy Pearl

Episode Date: September 23, 2025

Hey Lifers! It’s officially Laura’s last episode for a few weeks! What ‘pet’ term do you hate? Babe, bub or hubby? Did you ever say one ironically and then it somehow entered your vocabulary? Do we have a ‘maternity leave’ plan for Laura? No, no we do not. In a move that will be very unsurprising, we are just going to roll with it and see how Laura feels! Laura has a bone to pick with Matt about their health insurance.  Britt is constantly asked how married life is going but she doesn’t really know because she hasn’t seen her husband in 12 weeks! She’s over in Italy now and shares some of the tricker parts of being in a long distance relationship. We then jump into all of Laura’s birth plans. We speak about whether Laura has a birth plan, how she’s feeling quite unprepared and how the baby is in a bit of a complicated position. Laura also speaks about her previous ‘traumatic birth’ with Marlie Mae. We ask her who is going to be in the room, what she’s doing with the placenta and whether they will live stream it/post on socials? Please add your favourite songs to our push playlist Push It Real Good You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode was recorded on Camaragal land. Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Arnie Brittany. Well, not yet. We don't know. Well, I am. You've got two other kids. But like almost, almost three. I do feel like we need to preface this episode because we don't know when it's happened in the timeline of Life Uncut. So we're recording this early. Tonight, I'm going in for a stretch

and sweep. Tomorrow, we're recording last week's episode. And then this is coming out, I'm assuming, I'm assuming, hopefully, I have a baby. Because if I don't have a baby by the time this episode comes out, it's overcooked. But I think you're overcooking that statement when you're like, this is so early. We've only recorded this. I think this will be less than or just on two weeks early which isn't that much not two it's one no babe it's one week early 10 days sorry I just called you babe that was so weird oh you actually hey babe Laura messaged me yesterday and wrote hey babe and I wrote back no worries babes and she was like ew we vomited and that was great we don't yeah we don't baby each other I call you hun do I call everyone hun yeah sorry I

unfortunately used to use babe like ironically and then it became a part of my vocab and I really hated about myself I think some people do it well I don't do it well and so when I say babe I don't know. Anyway, I'm so sorry that I offended you so deeply. Do you know what word I can't stand? And I get the biggest ick for couples, bub, when they use it to call each other bub. I don't think people still do, though.

Yeah, I think they do. No. Well, look, just going back to the timeline of the episode. No, hang on. I want to sit in this. Okay, Keisha, I agree with you. How do you feel about hubby? No, hang on.

Bub. Bub. So bub is like that term. This is the weirdest, this weird that you brought this up. I detest it. Ben has never called me that, ever. and then the other day in a message he said it he said thanks bub and i was like i was like what bub doesn't offend me that much i mean don't call matter that's not on part of my vocab but it

doesn't i do call him daddy bob and daddy not ironically either okay all right okay back to the timeline okay so i know you said two weeks no we're recording this one week out from when this episode is going to play so technically it's actually not that far ahead in the world of podcasting most people record much further ahead than us we do one day usually yeah thank you you're just proving my point you were like oh this is so advanced i'm like we have waited as long as humanly vaginally possible cervically possible but the reason why is because like we're so used to doing everything in as close to real time as possible and it's weird talking about the fact that i'm like this is the last episode i'm going to be on for a little while

guys and i feel emotional and i'm going to leave you all i'll be back in like three weeks i doubt it'll even be that long i never take my time to leave so let's be real laura gets fomo i think and you know that's what we can get into but Laura there is not really a plan like we just know that you're going to have as much or as little time as you need so for all the lifers that are saying what's happening how long will you be away when we don't know we don't know we don't at this point we don't even know when the baby's coming we don't know if it's a girl we do know it's a girl and everyone knows its name is Poppy Pearl because Matt keeps talking about it on his podcast so in case you were curious Matt added the name ages ago and it's all yeah there's no secrets anymore

I love Poppy Pearl, but she's just going to get pee-pee. That's okay. I'm cool with that. Kids are going to get teased for something. It might as well be their name. It might as well be their name that I've set them up with for life. Well, I went through all of the options of like how she could be teased. Because I feel like when you pick a name, you're like, you know, you're Marley.

Then you go through all the different variations of how a kid could tease that child with that name. And I was like Poppy. Then I was like Floppy Poppy, Sloppy Poppy, Poppy Pearl, Pee-pee. Pee-pop me. I know, but then I realized actually the kids aren't me and it's just me. i'm doing it to my own child no one call my child sloppy poppy please because that will really upset me daily mail fuck off people wouldn't have thought about it and now you've just planted that in their head well okay so the way this is going to work is i probably already have a kid

by now which is insane so originally my induction was going to be around the 25th but there's no space for me to be induced on the 25th i should be being induced either the 22nd or the 23rd of this month which you know as you guys know was like yesterday or the day before so if you're listening to this there's a good chance I had the baby yesterday so what is the general timeline then from a stretch and sweep at this point to like trying to bring on the birth so I went to 42 weeks with Marley and I had so many I had like a stretch and sweep every 48 hours or something and it did absolutely nothing for me really hoping it was going to come before I left I don't know what's worse if the fact that I'm like oh damn like I missed the birth or if it's worse that

I'm like, yes, have it early so I can see it, then be like, see ya, and then just leave you. No, that's fine. That's good. I actually would prefer no one. I don't know. A lot of people, I don't want visitors. I just want to be by myself for five days.

Did you hear that, Kish? We're uninvited. Matt, fuck off. We are uninvited from Laura's house. But this is, I guess this episode is going to be a little bit different because I know some of you are probably sick of hearing about pregnancy and trust me, this will be the last episode. but we're kind of going to cover off some of like the pre-pregnancy birthing plan stuff on this

episode and then the next time you hear from me which will be in a few weeks time it will be like what happened during the birth hopefully i survived to tell the tale well wow childbirth used to be the biggest form of killer in women not anymore though now you have private health insurance i don't that's the problem we don't that's something else to talk about okay i contacted like the other day i had to send through our private health cover to the hospital so this time we're going private we've always been public before and I've never had to do like the whole process of private anyway I had to send off some of the forms and I was a little bit late sending them through and then I got this email saying that there was a mistake with one of them

and I was like what's going on anyway I am not the one who set up our health insurance Matt is the one who takes care of health insurance like he's across it and my gas and stuff yeah no I'm across your gas which is currently overdue and I have gotten a notification saying that we're in arrears Well, don't give me a bad credit. Can you pay it? I will give myself a bad credit, but you'll have no gas is the problem. It's a problem for multiple people. So I asked Matt, I was like, hey, can you send across like the confirmation of our insurance

so that I can at least know what kind of cover we have and who we're with and all that sort of stuff. Can I afford the anesthetic or do I have to go gas? Yeah. Like, am I allowed to get an epidural? What level am I at? So I asked him for it and he took a while to send it through and then I had to remind him and I reminded him again.

but I knew he was looking it wasn't like he didn't look for it I was like why is this taking so long it should just be an email anyway last night I was like hey I need to submit those papers this morning because it's one week until the baby's due and we're currently not booked in for the hospital and he was like yeah about that I don't know if we covered hey and I was like sorry what and he's like I don't know if the cover's up to date and I was like what gives you the impression that the cover's not up to date and he goes oh just the last email that I didn't pay it he goes the last email I received and I was like show me the email and the email says your cover has expired pay now or you will not be covered and that was in February Matt I can't be sure but I don't think

we're covered you're definitely not covered so you're not covered we're not covered so Laura's like hey we're public this time we're going private she's like actually no this time we're not going private we're back to public so yeah we're farting but it's fine so I haven't seen that in three days i don't know where he is that's so bad i want to it's so bad it's funny but then it's actually not funny if you break it down yeah unfortunately it lapsed during the time that he was in the jungle and i wasn't across his emails but there were multiple emails prior that would have you can also cut this out but weren't you guys the ambassador for the health there was so guys you were like the face of it guys we've known for so long like as in like

okay so maybe like three months and it's booper they're great okay i have it's not about booper booper is amazing for three months of this year we were like ambassadors for booper on this podcast i was like yeah this is who we choose we choose booper and we weren't even anyway sign up to booper i highly recommend just don't let your arm don't let your cover lapse mine's rolling mine just rolls over i wish mine was i think you have to like sign up to the direct debit so that they have the allowance to just like charge back i probably assumed that i would forget to cover it and then you have to pay the extra tax and all the levies and all that shit oh i'm waiting for that medicare levy to hit me in the next tax return it reminds me though of

so like this happened so many years ago but it reminds me of my ex-boyfriend from a million years ago my new current birth reminds me of my ex who never would have let health insurance no the opposite the opposite so i think we were together for like three years like we lived together it was very serious oh man he felt like it was serious with all the other women he was with as well no he never cheated on me he was a good one he was a good one he was a good one no he was just disorganized just take us back to which one this is bed on the floor fucking the leg which one we need like the reminder he's probably not one that i speak about very often because he was actually relatively great musician no no no i speak about him that's better on the

floor um okay so this guy was great except he was really bad at any paperwork i would 100 think that he probably had some sort of undiagnosed adhd like he'd just forget things he could hyper fixate on work and like loved design and like that world of technology. But then when it came to anything else, like he hadn't done his tax in like 17 years. And I, yeah. And I was like really worried that we were going to get arrested for tax fraud at that time. So we went away on a holiday and I'd been overseas in Bali for two weeks. And then we went to Mexico together and we came back from Mexico. So I've been away from the house for about a month. And he'd also been on a work trip for two weeks and then had come to Mexico and we'd spent this time together. So four weeks, no one had been

in our apartment and we came home from this trip and I opened the front door I was like oh my god did you not give the cat to the neighbor like what has died in this house and then I went to turn the lights on and there was no electricity and I was like okay that's weird and then I realized I went to the fridge and all of the meat that had been stored in the freezer had defrosted weeks earlier and had dripped out of the freezer and had rotted down the fridge and I was like how has this happen he's like I got no idea that's crazy I gotta get to work so I got left with this rotting fridge situation and then I found out two hours later he just had not paid the electricity bill and we had been cut off I would just move and do you know how many warnings you get about paying

your electricity bill like that is a daily like hey before we cut your electricity off we just want to remind you every single day okay well knowing that if I lose my gas I know I have been reminded so many times to pay your gas bill I'm so sorry Laura do you know what the difference with Laura and I this is our relationship I get a message from Laura hey Brit your gas is due I'm like thanks babes next day I'm like hey Laura Marley needs a vaccination because I get all their her I get all her health emails and all her health letters sent to my house that your health insurance lapsed maybe all the data's being sent to me I do want to I know that you guys most of you know this if you've been a lifer for a long time but if you're new to this situation I look

after Laura's kids health yeah Brittany's my PA no if you're new to this situation this might sound rogue as Britt lives in my old apartment and I never updated any of my mail so she still receives all of my mail and we just kind of like have this mutual agreement that I pay for things that you use that yeah I have the shorter end of the stick because you just have to pay like three monthly you pay a gas bill I'm looking after your fines Matt's fines I'm looking after the girl's vaccination record their health record every time you have to pay for your electoral because you haven't updated the I'm doing it all I'm like a I'm like a proper family CPA and I'm like, Maeve? You can never leave that apartment because I'm never updating that shit.

You're going to have to. You're going to have to. I even get, I get books. I think you sign up to a book club. I don't know. I get books from Laura every second week. I'm like, I don't want another book. I think it's the PR agency that thinks I still live there. Send me something good. All right. Well, as much as I know these episodes about you and I'm all for it, let's just like sit on me. Let's give me two minutes. You can have as many minutes as you want all right 20 let's go the rest of the episode you're having a baby and I am probably trying to make a baby I am in Italy okay so I would have been in Italy for two days maybe like I would have only just got there I think so at the time of recording I'm leaving in one more week's time

and I have not seen Ben in 12 weeks basically since the wedding we got married we had I think he came to Australia for two weeks after we had those little mini moons and then I haven't seen him in 12 weeks so it's like I cannot I cannot tell you how I am married life going for you guys it's so funny because people keep saying that to me people are like oh my god grads has married life I'm like I don't know I don't even see him I haven't seen him since the wedding I was like great I think I as much as I feel married and I said it feels different I can't experience it because we just still talk on the phone I'm like well our nightly conversation is still good you I was just saying before and, like, I think that it's the thing

that everyone who has ever done long-distance struggles with. There's, like, a period of time that's fine and easy and then the closer you get to seeing each other, the longer it's been. It's kind of like that three-month period. Yeah. The longer it's been, that's when you get to a point where you're like, okay, this is actually really hard now.

There's nothing left to talk about. We've talked about the day-to-day stuff every day and it's quite hard to keep that conversation going when you're not having any more moments together. You know what I mean? Or, like, building more memories. I've said it before in the past. It's so accurate.

it's like I'm fine with long distance but I think long distance needs to be like max eight weeks it's coming up to three years we've been doing it so I've got the experience now I think you could see a partner every four or five weeks great but for us eight weeks seems to be where it switches from being fine you're hustling you're busy whatever you're still like frothing talking to each other and then from like the nine ten eleven twelve weeks it's just it gets harder it's so hard and not hard nothing changes other than you have exhausted the normal conversation it just becomes very monotonous so it's like how is your day and one of you is just waking up so they've got nothing to talk about them in a sleep great hours how's your day great what'd you get up to this what

do you got planned you know I'm also a creature of habit so my days look the same like I go to the same dog parks I go for a swim at the same place I go to the same cafe like so very rarely am I like oh I went on a yacht it's like you know it just becomes monotonous and I think that's when And I, poor Ben, but I start to get a bit like short and I know it. Like I just get short with him and it's because I'm not frustrated at him. I'm frustrated at the situation. It gets to the point and this last week has been really bad and he knows. I haven't said it straight up, but he knows.

But this past week I have sacrificed one of our calls a little bit. So like we talk in the morning and night and they're both quite, you know, like maybe half an hour to an hour, depends how much time we've got. I've started to shorten the nighttime one because I need to finish The Summer I Turned Pretty, which is the show I have been binge watching. And it got to the point where I'm like, okay, I know nothing new is going to come from my conversation with you.

No, but it's in a nice way. But something new might come from Amazon Prime. Because you're talking about the same stuff. So I don't sacrifice a call. We still catch up. But then quite often we just hang out on the phone. So you'll hang out and cook dinner. You're just watching each other on FaceTime.

You're doing your like day-to-day stuff. but now it's to the point where I was like baby I've got to go I was like I've got four episodes to get through tonight if I'm gonna make it on time for the finale it's like when you listen to a podcast you put on two times speed because you just want to get through it that's you and your relationship right now can I also just one more thing do you remember I just so funny to remember when a life eroding a review to us personally and it was it was like quite offensive but she was like I used to love you guys but you speak too quickly now I get a message at least once every three days this is a bit of a word of warning if you're listening to this right now and

we sound like hamsters or we sound like we've done far too many lines of an illegal substance we're on 2.5 speed yes you can change your playback speed on your podcast and it's probably on 1.25 or 1.5 i know we speak quickly but we don't speak ridiculously quickly and it happened happens all the time two days ago it would have been the most recent time and i just say to people i'm like what app are you listening on i'll show you how to check alternatively if you want to That's just sound like we're stoned on marijuana. Put it on half speed. If you've got a three hour drive in the podcast, it's only two hours.

Hello, everybody. Anyway, that's my update. I am with Ben again. We're only together for 10 days, but it's going to be hopefully 10 blissful days. I will probably bombard you with social media, with loved up stories. Not that I've stopped. I'm here for the Aperol Spritz content. Aperol Spritz.

That's all you want from me? It's all Laura wants right now. look she doesn't give a fuck she doesn't give a fuck how benny is she's like yeah i'm ready for it send me the apparel come on send me photos of apparel spritz and oysters that's it that's all i want to see you'll be able to do both of those things express day one have it apparel you're good yeah i don't know i don't know how soon i feel like it might be poo-pooed if you're bringing alcohol into the hospital yeah too soon i bet it would happen okay well let's get into the episode that you're all here for we're already in aren't we no the questions let's

Let's talk about the birth. Speaking of a birth plan, are you planning on taking any alcohol in? No, but I do want someone to smuggle in some champagne. I have kind of asked a few people. I want like a post-birth shampers. Is that okay? Yes. I don't know if it is.

You're not a medical doctor. And I feel like medical doctors and midwives would say probably not advised. No, I think you are allowed a little bit because I think it needs an X amount. Again, I'm not a doctor. I'm not even going to say this. There is no safe limit. Okay, I'm going to be the responsible one. There is no safe limit.

I think there is. I just really want a celebratory shampoos. Why don't we get alcohol-free? Our videographer said yes. Because it tastes like, okay. Laura just looked at me like, you disgusting slime. Do you know why? Because I went out for dinner recently and I ordered an alcohol-free wine,

which don't get me wrong, alcohol-free beer, amazing. Like it is heaps normal. Do you drink beer? I love a beer on a warm day. She's a cool girl. You drink beer? I'm a pick me. I'm just doing it so that men like me.

I'm only drinking alcohol beer. I love beer at the rugby. yeah I love watching the football and drinking alcohol-free beer I do love the football fuck you guys I didn't know that about you how have we got this I didn't I've never seen you drinking beer since I met you you're always on a margie or a vino yeah because like I would never get a no one to pick me no because I never would choose a non-alcoholic margarita I'll just have a juice or a non-alcoholic mojito or whatever do you know I mean like they don't taste the same but a non-alcoholic beer tastes exactly the same and if I'm only gonna have like a drink at a

barbecue or something then i have a non-alcoholic beer is fine we're at a barbecue now i was at one on the weekend wow okay but the non-alcoholic wine was not good oh so my issue with non-alcoholic wine is that it is so it's so expensive is that there's no point it's not that it's so expensive like i think it cost me 15 or 16 dollars for a glass like it cost me the same price as what a normal glass with alcohol in it tastes it was a Shiraz that had been de-alkalized and it legitimately tasted like grapefruit juice like it did not taste it would be okay if it tasted like a wine and the alcohol had been taken out of it but I'm yet to find one where you try it and you're like yes I feel like that's suspiciously wine-like tasting to me it doesn't it doesn't hit the same so not

in the same as in like I don't get a buzz but it doesn't taste the same and also like my other gripe is just that mocktails and everything else cost the same amount as an almost a real cocktail sale it's like 15 and it's just juice with some fucking passion fruit pulp at the bottom you know what i don't understand about this is that a reason in australia that alcohol is so expensive is because there's such a high tax on it so then why are your mojitos so expensive guys i'm really talking about the cost of living on nearly every episode that we've done recently but it doesn't make sense we all can't your fault because sorry not to victim blame me no i think it i think it's pregnancy's fault because i can't i can't drink during pregnancy no but i mean i'm let's blame

poppy poppy bell let's blame sloppy poppy my poor child she's not even born yet i'm already trolling her i'm gonna be a great mom i'm gonna put your announcement you know how people used to put the announcement in the newspaper i'm gonna say welcome to the world floppy sloppy poppy what if i say it was sloppy and here is poppy about the birth fucking hell let's talk about the birth how are you feeling because it is go time baby like for us recording wise it doesn't get this will be like the last big recording before it pops out so like how are you feeling? I think I'm in denial to be honest still a little bit and I think I've pushed the disorganization to a point where it's actually now just a bit ridiculous like I realized the other night I was in bed and I

started to get some weird feelings like cramps I'd also had like there's probably too much information but at the time so two days ago I had quite a bit of blood like mucusy blood which sometimes can mean like baby's on its way right so then that night I had like lots of Braxton Hicks and I was laying in bed and I just had this moment where I was like I don't know why I've done this to myself and I don't know what about me being disorganized like why have I had this resistance to kind of packing a baby bag or anything yeah but like I don't have tracksuit pants that I could wear in the hospital like I haven't bought anything I've got one pack of Tom's maternity pads that's literally it it'll last you about a day I don't I just don't have anything planned

I haven't set up the bassinet still I haven't like nothing I've got a couple of onesies that one of my girlfriends when it was like you know baby shower time that my girlfriends got for it well my group of girlfriends got for me and I don't know why I've been so apprehensive to get organized I think partly it's because I had this resistance where I'm like number three doesn't we don't need stuff like we know that we can manage three doesn't matter no it does but I know that I can manage with very little in comparison to I felt over prepared for the first time but I don't know why I haven't at least gotten myself slightly organized so that if I do go into spontaneous labor, I can actually take a bag to the hospital. Do you know what this is

reminding me of? I saw this a couple of months ago on Grace Beverly's Instagram. I think that her friend had had a baby and it was quite young. There were like three or four of the friends. They were all really close and they went over one day. They all had a bucket of cleaning supplies. They had gloves and everything and they cleaned her entire house. They organized her cupboards. They did all of that. Oh my God, that's amazing. And I thought it was just such a kind thing to like do for a friend you're a very hard person to buy for because you're not very materialistic and you're like you're saying you want to come over and clean i've got my drills i've got my steel cats i will come and i'm the person hear me out i will pay for a cleaner that's my gift to you but

i am not i'm not coming on all fours i'm not coming to scrub your floor i will be on all fours i have seen that floor i'll pay a cleaner i'll bring her with me she can just sit there for entertainment i will come and organize your house but i think the thing is you've i get it i get it i am like this in every other aspect of my life too where you know doing something simple is going to help you so much but you can't bring yourself to do it you wait until like i've talked about this is obviously not similar to giving birth but like even when i pack for overseas i will pack an hour before i have to go when i could have had a week off yeah and i will not and i don't know what the science is behind it probably has something to do with adhd i would say and i'm not

saying I am but I'm like I think for you Laura probably I love that you love to diagnose me on every episode well you're undiagnosed ADHD Laura no but it is something but like I think it's quite common it's just a procrastination tool and I don't know why people do it I don't know why I do it don't know why we all do it but also having said that I think that you have been in charge of literally growing this child and you've had no time off Matt can also put a bassinet together I think if he's got a job it's to get his drill and bassinet that yeah and he will don't I guess the thing is it will sometime in the next four days well it is the thing that's reassuring is like I'm going to end up at the hospital and then I'll be there for I'm going to stay for as long

as I possibly can this time he will have time so like if I have a baby he can go home and put a pram together and put a bassinet together and lots of stuff but I also think it's twofold I don't think I'm just living in denial about it I have never gone into spontaneous labor Marley was induced and she was two weeks late Lola was induced and I think because I've always been induced I've just convinced myself that I'm not going to go into spontaneous labor and so I've convince myself like, well, I know I've got another week, but realistically it could be tomorrow. It could be any day, but I don't think I've gotten my head around the concept that actually a spontaneous labor could be a possibility for me.

Is it the case that if you have a baby, let's say that you had a baby at 38 weeks, you'll consistently have a baby at 38 weeks or is it a little bit more random? It's all different. And I feel like there's nothing, especially with number three, I feel like number three can be a real wild card. I think it depends too. So I know my sister, Sherry, who went five weeks early, they've said to her that for different health reasons the fact that she went early she's likely to always go early right but I think that ties into things like having preeclampsia and different stuff like that but there can be specific things like I'm not saying it's just a normal healthy

pregnancy but there are specific things that make people more prone to like being early yeah for sure but for me I've always been late so like I just assume I'm going to be late is the lack of preparation making you feel more anxious or do you think that you're just like procrastinating because you've got so much work to get done no I don't think I'm anxious at all and I think the procrastination part it absolutely does come down to the fact that like work has been so busy and I know I kind of feel a bit annoyed at myself because I know last time I was like well I'll never do it like this again and now we're back here a week out from having a baby and there's still like multiple days left of work and lots to do but the real I think it's just a very harsh reality of

when you run your own businesses when you know and when when like doing this podcast is so important and it also is our business and you know we have employees and everything else and then also there's Tony May and then there's radio and trying to like align things so that it this sounds so bad to say but so it doesn't inconvenience anyone like doing work in a way that makes it the least pressure on the rest of the team just means that like that has to get done first and then and when you have two kids already you're not like laying in bed being like is that a kick oh like enjoying the small moments of like being pregnant. Stop kicking Poppy. Mama's got work to do. It used to be like is that a kick or is that flatulence and now it's just like no it's the thing is is with the first

and second the first you have so much more time to feel connected I think because it's just you and being pregnant yeah the second time you have a little bit less time to feel connected you still have those moments but you are not as busy the third time I found I'm so busy taking care of two humans that are already alive and then doing all the other stuff in life I just haven't had moments to sit there and like revel in the joy of pregnancy. And so maybe that's what's made me more of a realist about this one rather than it feeling, and I'm so conscious about choosing my words, but like it doesn't feel as magical because I haven't had time

to feel connected to the magic of it all, you know, quote, unquote. Yeah, but I think that that relates to anything in life. It's like any new first experience is always going to be something that you remember more or connect to more. It always hits different. A first in anything, first love, first sex, first trip, first holiday first girl's trip first whatever it's like any first there was no magic in my first sex yeah i don't even know why i said that was terrible tell us more how did that go down

no one is having magical first sex now i need to know how was that it was fine it would probably lasted only a couple minutes was it a boyfriend or was it a cute i was quite late surprisingly for how you know like 15 my 20s went i was nearly 18 i think laura was late too well i'm not late I was late for the school I went to for that week. I love that you said 15 and that's late. I was 17. 15 was a joke. I was 17 but I was like just finishing school when it was my boyfriend as well.

Yeah, because you were a child genius. You were really bad. Because my mum sent me to school when I was four and way too young because she wanted to get me out of the fucking house. Britt, I need to know about your first time now. Oh, my first time was with my boyfriend of a year and I waited till we'd been together for a year. Oh, that was his anniversary present.

No, wait. i waited till we were together for a year to make sure that he was like in it for the right reason and then we had sex when he dumped me you can't even write it and that is what started the rest of my dating history okay so you don't feel now do you feel a level of like nerve or anxiety knowing because i imagine like someone hasn't given birth but birth to me because i haven't experienced it I feel like I'd be quite nervous about it like what how it's going to go down the pain of it the exhaustion people talking about it goes for days and like you know you hear all these not to

terrorize anyone who's already pregnant listening to this podcast episode no but it's like you know I mean a woman is if you go in and having a vaginal birth there is whether you have drugs or not there's a baby coming out of you is there well it's like how can we not have a level of like fucking how is this gonna go down like for me I feel like I would feel really nervous but yeah you've tried and tested now so I mean I feel like there's been so much downstairs destruction that I'm just gonna cough this baby out I hope so I'll sneeze one day violently and I'll think I wet myself with the babies on the floor do you think you like have those you have all those pregnancies where people like I didn't even know I was pregnant and then out the baby came I'm like

how did you not know there were signs no look I don't have a lot of anxiety about it this time at all. It'll be what it will be. And maybe that has been my perspective going into most of my birth. I don't have a birth plan. I don't have a concept of how it's going to go. I assume I'm going to end up being induced. And I had a call with my obstetrician the other day because I was like, hey, I haven't really thought this through. What do I do if I'm not induced and I go into labor? And he was like, oh yeah, you got to call the maternity ward. And I was like, that's information you probably should tell me because I don't know what to do if I just go into spontaneous labor at this point I have a real bee in my bonnet about this I have two so my sister-in-law and one

of my friends both had planned c-sections because they had a breach or like upside down or whatever the different things are they knew that they were going to have to have c-sections and my partner is involved in c-sections quite a lot it's a big part of his job and so before both of those births I was like, oh, do you just want to like jump on a call and with us, you know, and we can chat through any questions that you have. I could not believe how little they knew about the process that they were about to go into. I genuinely, I still to this day, I've got a friend giving birth a day or two around your time, Laura.

And we had this same conversation only two weeks ago. And I was like, the most amazing thing that I found out about was that if you do have a C-section, you don't feel nothing from the waist down. yeah I've heard that it feels as though someone's doing dishes like doing the dishes in your belly wow that's amazing yeah apparently you can still feel pressure you just can't and I was like why does no one talk about this well that's the same as like having an epidural having an epidural you can still feel stuff you don't just like completely dead from the waist down this might be really naive I didn't know that but you don't feel pain you feel pressure you feel pushing yeah it's a

really odd sensation it's so strange to me though like surely there's a video surely they just send a YouTube link and go, here's some things that you have to know before you're about to go through this process. It's women's health. Why would you think that there'd be any education around that? Also, I hope that this does not sound at all like I'm shitting on healthcare workers. You guys are incredibly understaffed. I absolutely do not mean it like that. I mean that it's surprising to me that there's not like a government program where there's like a website with frequently asked questions. There absolutely is. I think the problem is though, is that you don't know what you don't know so you don't know to ask the questions and often it's assumed because when

people do the same thing on repeat themselves they're like how did you not know this like it's such an obvious thing to know and so then there can be a gap in the information so for me you know the fact that i've had three baby well this is my third my obstetrician was like how do you not know what you do if you go into labor you call the delivery suite but i didn't know because i'd never done it before and so there was a gap there you know so what is the plan like you think if you are induced you have epidurals don't you yeah i'm gonna get into the hospital and i'm gonna say please give me the drug selection menu and then i'm gonna look through and i'll be like and when is the champagne coming general anesthetic please no i will have an epidural i'm pretty sure also i

found out that the baby's posterior posterior means that her spine goes against my spine so it's a particularly painful and uncomfortable birth so she's head down she's head down so when you give birth the baby's face is supposed to be facing your butthole right like it's supposed to facing that way so the spine is supposed to be against your belly instead of bone on bone whereas when she comes out her head is back to front so she's going against the canal and her back will bend against my tailbone so is there a way to swivel her not really at this point she might swivel herself but Marley was posterior she didn't turn so I'm probably in store for a more uncomfortable birth or like a lot more uncomfortable birth than if the baby was the right way around

yeah so drug up yeah yeah to the eyeballs yeah because then it's not that uncomfortable keep topping up is someone tugging who knows what's going on down there like that's what you want right i think the thing that i'm the most scared about though is like having another episiotomy or tearing so like i've already i've had an episiotomy each time and i don't really want to have another one and the problem i had with marley which was you know obviously years ago she was not a particularly nice birth and i had um she got caught in your flap she's using it like a burrito we couldn't untangle her from the flap no my epidural I had an epidural failure so my epidural stopped working and no one would believe me so it was

fine like I was at the very end point of getting her out so I was handling it wasn't that I was handling the pain I was in a lot of pain but I was wasn't bothering with the epidural at that point because she was so close to being out but then they said that they needed to give me an episiotomy. And I was like, but I can feel everything. And they were like, no, you can't, you have the epidural. And I was like, yes, I can. And we had this moment back and forth where I was like, I can feel everything. And it was very rushed because she was stuck and it got very stressful. They needed to get her out quickly. And they were kind of like, you're fine. And I thought they'd topped up my epidural, at least were going to before they gave me an episiotomy.

And then they cut me and I could feel everything and I went into shock. So I wasn't able to push anymore. So obviously I don't want to frighten anyone, but I was so overwhelmed in that experience because I'd never done it before. And also I just assumed that they were going to fix the problem before they gave me the episiotomy, but I didn't really know what was going on. And by the time they started, I was screaming. Like it was, it was a horrible, horrible experience that Molly came out. She was fine. Everything was fine. I wasn't fine, but she was fine. And then it was such a weird and kind of like surreal period afterwards because everyone was apologizing to me so I knew that something had gone very wrong had a lot of apologies they'd obviously then like upped the

epidural and whatnot and they were trying to like numb the area mate the baby's out yeah but then they kept coming to me and being like you have had a traumatic birth experience and it was said to me so many times because you have to go through like there's a series of discharge things if you're considered to have a traumatic birth but like I didn't know what constituted a traumatic birth because I'd never been through it before. So being told this was a traumatic birth experience was also like a really weird thing to try. Yeah, anyway.

So then I had Lola and Lola was fucking easy and it was breezy and it's with the same obstetrician. So like I'm really like looking forward to going into this because I really love who my obstetrician is. And they will have all that on your file now. Totally. So they'll be extra careful with making sure. They'll be like tickling your feet.

Can you feel anything? Literally. And he was amazing with the last one. So I'm genuinely not worried because I feel like I've done this rodeo before. Yeah, yeah. But that's probably my only anxiety is around having another fucking cut through the side. I'm like, oh.

Are we going to set some rules and parameters around Matt and when he can and can't go and eat a sandwich? You can go. My sister's going to be there in the room. So my sister's coming. Have you saved her a seat next to me? And if I go early, you're coming. So at the moment we've got Alicia, potentially Brit,

if she's here in the country. There was a time where I wanted to live stream and you were talking about maybe doing it. That's just been brushed aside. Keisha's like, how did I get left out of this equation now? Now I've got FOMO. You can come if you want to. Ness, want to come too?

Keisha's in there with the lapel, not a lapel mic, what's the big boom mic? You know how you have to hold a boom mic? I've got a ring light and making sure you're lit from both sides. I did just buy one of those Neewa beauty lights that you can clip onto your phone. So please make sure you get a really like, I want the video of the baby coming out and exiting on social media.

Can we just take a walk back memory lane when I bought that light and you gave me so much shit for having, it's in my bag right now. I carry it around with me. It's a phone light. Laura gave me so much shit. Then like a week ago, she's like, hey, Britt, what was the name of that light? I literally bought two of them on Amazon. It's like the time that you gave me shit for having Crocs and then you bought Gucci ones.

Ben bought them and they're Gucci. Fuck you. I also have normal Crocs, okay? That's so good. What are you doing with the placenta? I shotgunned it. Britt, I've made it into tablets so that Britt has some beauty tablets to take. Young Trevor.

Great for the skin. It's really good. It's really good for keeping young. So I have bought them from a good price. Friend price. embryonic cells. I'm also selling my breast milk for anyone who wants it as well. I took that as well. I'll take one again to stay young. No, you're not doing anything with it. I'm not doing anything with the, with the placenta. I mean, I thought about it for a while and then I realized

I was only doing it for content. I don't want to eat my own placenta. It's not for me. It's actually, I want a champagne. Hashtag earth mother. Look at me go. The difference with people, Laura's like someone, someone take my placenta away so I can drink. It's supposed to be really good for you to make into tablets and consume like apparently the recovery is sped up so you might want to think about it I just feel like all of the comments about that are probably made from the companies that make it into tablets no there is a lot of research no I know there is and I know a lot of people like well animals do it so like humans should do it too because it's so enriched with nutrients and everything else but I also kind of think animals do it so they

don't get eaten by other animals in the wild like so that you don't have this big bloody mass sitting next to your babies and a wolf comes along and sniffs it out and eats it no I think it's recovery my girlfriend told me the most funniest story actually probably wasn't funny for her at the time but she had like a you know a not great experience and she had a lot of blood loss during birth and so after her baby came out people were like rushing around and it was really stressful and she's just said she just has this memory of being really twilight in this days and hearing this like clang like this big bang happen and she said i just rolled to the side and looked and someone had just knocked my placenta off the table off the tray and it had slid across the floor

she's like I was just sitting there watching my placenta on the ground as everyone was running over it that's disgusting exactly roadkill like a jellyfish isn't it so bad so I have no birth plan at all I'm going in like whatever rodeo let's do it I will happily take the drugs especially if it's induced I'll try the drugs if I go into spontaneous labor who knows I'll see what happens but I probably will still take the drugs and we talked about it on last week's episode but it's Like now it's got a bit of gusto behind it. Playlist. I don't want your normal birthing playlist.

I want, what do we call it? Push it real good. Push it real good. Life Uncut. I tried for a different name. I've added the first song to it and it's Diana Ross, I'm Coming Out. Fucking hell. That's a good.

I'm coming out. I want the world to know. Got to let it show. Is it a gay anthem or is it a birthing song? Who knows? No, I still vote. I wanted to call the playlist Life is Giving Life. That is in the description.

I put that in there for you so that you were included, but I thought it was a bit too. Let's make Brittany feel included. It was very Earth mother-y. So we have created this as a gift to you. If you also don't want a conventional calm birthing playlist and you want something that feels fun and upbeat, this is what this is meant to be.

It's the anti-birth list. But think outside the box. Like obviously there's like salt and pepper push it. There's the really obvious ones, which obviously we're going to include, but think outside the box give us the goods it also doesn't need to be exactly birth related like it just could be i don't know i can't even think of one at the moment one shot eat your pasta mom's spaghetti i could give birth to that i could do that i would too okay so question i'm not here i've gone away you're going to birth are you going to let me know live like an update that it's

happening or are you just going to surprise me with a photo of a baby no i'm going to let you know live i also was considering i was like do i just post on social media like on my stories i'm i'm going into labor i don't i actually feel so differently about number three than what i did about number one and two one and two i was like it's a secret number three i'm like hey everyone i don't i'm crowning like i just don't i feel really i just shut myself everyone no i don't think we need those updates i reckon update your your people and then update i mean do whatever you want i'm not i don't fucking control you but this is my thought um and then update it once you've had the baby because like i say this nicely but not everything has to be social media i don't

think it has to be like hey everyone i'm giving birth like just go and have that experience let us know but i think you can just let people i think that's a no to the live stream unless we're gonna make bank off the live stream but like britney was all unless we can commodify britney was all for the live stream when there was a potential that it was going to be monetized via life uncut and then when it wasn't she was like that's a terrible idea well when i heard that just you wanted the funds and i wasn't going to get any no i'm just to be clear i was we make a lot of jokes i was never live streaming the birth nor was i monetarily getting people to sign up for it i never wanted to take your money from the dangle the carrot in front of me like

let's i'm sure it was a legitimate question why because i look back on people like sarah's day but maybe sarah's day didn't live stream it to her credit but she did she was kind of like one of the first people to really like show the entire birth experience as someone who is a social media influencer person and i remember at the time being like that's nuts like why would anyone do that and don't get me wrong i am actually not doing that that is not my intention but now I don't feel as I just don't I don't hate it as much in terms of like I don't feel as offended by it like and I get that it's very sacred and whatnot the thing I don't like about it is if someone's using it as a way of like growing their audience and they're thinking

strategically at the time but to me is odd this conversation I don't remember how much we spoke about on the podcast but it came up around the time I was getting married there was it was like The first TikToker that basically like live posted, it wasn't live, but she posted so much of her wedding as it was happening. So it was, she was live posting, but not necessarily live streaming. They didn't do a live stream when they're getting ready and straight after and stuff. But she even put up that thing where she was like, you guys,

like because she was an influencer, she was like, you basically paid for this wedding, so you should be a part of it. I remember us talking about it being like, what is the deal? You know, what's the exchange? i just think and it's exactly what i just said about the birth people can do what they want like i'm not going to judge you and if you want to post your whole birth i'm not going to judge you but i also just really want it to be clear because i feel like i've made a lot of jokes on this episode that people are going to think i'm a horrible person but this wedding and i went and

watched it after it and i just thought you were not as much as it was so cool to be taken into her story and she's an influencer and she would have got so many more followers i was like you just haven't even you cannot i don't care what anyone says you cannot be present fully if you are like just thinking about the content quickly making sure that content is okay to upload spending the time uploading it like I just for me it's just a there are some times in life that I think it's okay just to go quiet and like I don't think I posted one thing on my wedding day or the next day or I just think I just sat in it for three days because the thing is is that it becomes a job right so like if you're someone who's sharing your wedding and even though you know

this influencer who said you guys have pretty much paid for this wedding so I want to bring you along for it well then you're still looking at your wedding as though it is a financial it's a job because at the end of the day all of those things the posting the curating the creating the content all of that takes time energy and effort and then therefore you're not actually experiencing the life thing that you've put all this money and time and and emotion into as well yeah I get that completely and look I mean I know I say like I don't feel as connected in terms of like I'm not as prepared and stuff for this but I think the thing that I'm most excited about is like how excited the girls are about having a baby sister and like it's their excitement that gets me super

excited like I feel very pragmatic and realistic about I know it's going to be hard I know there's going to be hard sleep I know it's going to be a transition I know we're going back into the trenches but like seeing their utter joy and now they've got a calendar for the countdown and they're just so excited and it's them who has been able to make me feel like I'm actually connected and excited to it yeah whereas like i've just been so caught in the busy that they're little like and even lol anytime she's having like a hard moment about anything i'll be like how many days do you think it is now until poppy's here and it just like takes her straight out of that and you can ask her anything like this morning she was had a terrible mood after getting out of bed

and i was like do you think poppy's gonna have a bottle or do you think where do you think poppy's gonna get her milk from when she comes out and lola straight away is like your boobies you know Like everything is so exciting to her. And then she'll start talking about like, and then she's going to need a high chair and she's going to need a pram. And I was like, do you think Poppy can crawl when she comes out? Like their excitement around being big sisters is just the sweetest thing. Again, it's not about me, but I am also in denial.

It is weird that we've gotten to this point and it's within reach. Like the whole time you've been sitting here, I've been trying to look at you with a baby in your arms. and it just took me back like when we started this podcast six and a half years ago nearly there were no children earthside but i was eight months pregnant with marley you were about to pop but it's like it's just so many of your lifers have come with us on the journey since day one which i think is really special it's like you've seen the evolution of well laura's had an evolution i'm still here with no kids but you've seen laura pop had an evolution that you dated everyone and

now you're married we've had different evolutions but it's wild to think how far we've come in this time and you know what the coolest part is I've said it before creating this podcast means we have like such an in-depth diary of our life forever like we can look back on so many things and experiences and times and that is such a spectacular thing to have and it's it's rare because not everyone gets to do it yeah it's like a time capsule of like the last six years also Don't listen to the kids, listen to it though. I do regret some things I've said. We all do.

We all do. We all regret the things you said, Laura. A hundred percent. And also like going from having Marley and Lola and like bringing them into recordings and like, as I said, obviously I'm having some time off for quote unquote maternity leave. What that looks like. It could literally be just a couple of weeks.

I'm going to come back and have an episode and update you guys all on how the birth actually went. Keisha's going to be filling in for me. Keisha like straight up to the plate Brit goes on I'm a celebrity, Keisha's there Laura pisses off to have a baby Like a TV on a rainy day We love you

and I'm so grateful I'm so grateful that like you're such a part of all of this that you know it's no one's going to miss that I'm gone I'm really grateful too because I mean it's a little bit of a momentous thing because when I first met you guys it was via distance we didn't even meet in person

We didn't let you on the mic or camera You were about to give birth to Lola yeah so I remember getting one of my first emails from you and Laura had literally gone into labor and she was still emailing me from the hospital you were like I've got some hours to kill you know and that was when I first started working for you so it's a pleasure yeah and I I mean I know we've kind of touched on this before when we talked about the whole maternity leave aspect and stuff and I've said in the past I'm not paying you for maternity leave yeah we don't life on cards we don't have maternity leave no my I guess like my biggest regret was not being able to slow

down right and that I said you know if I have a third baby I'm going to slow down it's almost impossible and I know that some people will be like but it's not it's really really a different experience when you run your own businesses because the wheels don't just stop turning and also it's something I love doing as well and it's very hard to step away and have confidence that everything is just set and it's going to be fine without you and I don't mean that in a laugh uncut sense yeah okay so I think that was directed at us no I know you guys will be fine But I mean, in a Tony Mays sense, like I'm such a critical part of the business. And so like, I know that I'll still go to work and I know I'll take the baby to work

like I always did. And I'm sure six months time down the track, I'll look back on it and I'll say, God, I wish I had more time of having time off and having maternity leave. Use Britney 20. I think Britney 20 for Tony Mays, Keisha 20. Everyone's got discount codes at Life Uncut 20. But it's funny you say that because the other day Laura and I were just having a conversation on the phone and she's like, guess what time I've got to be at work tomorrow for Tony Mays?

She's like, we've got to shoot. she goes 4.15 for makeup she's like I cannot deal with this anymore and it's like Laura you know that you're the boss I was like you set that time like you booked this shoot she's like that's a valid point I was like this could have been a midday shoot I was like I hate my boss could have been a sunset shoot I was like you chose the 4.15 it's true and and you know I'll complain about it a bit but the thing is is I think you always look back and you think about the things that you would do differently but also like I love what I do for work I'm so lucky that I get to do this. And I'm also so lucky that my job and the capacity for my work allows me to bring a baby

to work and still do it. Like most women don't have that. And so, you know, having maternity leave is critical for them to be able to do both. I had that conversation with Ben this morning on the way to work. We were talking about like, how many people do you think in life would want to do a different job? And he was like, what job would you want to do if you won the lotto? And I was like, I would do this job. I said, I genuinely feel like the luckiest person in the world to get to come to work with my friends and speak and have this community and I was like there is nothing else I would rather do and that was like a really heartfelt moment and I am getting my period so hormones were high but it was like a really heartfelt like I was like wow I'm I'm living

my dream job I feel so lucky yeah and like guys I want to say I'm so grateful I've received so many messages from lifers over the last couple of weeks like well wishes into giving birth just you know camaraderie with people who also piss themselves yeah so many messages from people who are at the point of sneezing where you hold your vagina and not your nose like vagina blue vaginas like you guys are just the absolute fucking best and I'm I know I have spoken a lot over the last couple of weeks about being pregnant it has consumed my entire life like I think for anyone who has done it you kind of get to this point in pregnancy and it's like yes you can talk about other things but you're always thinking oh my god I'm pregnant I'm getting kicked in the

vagina I'm getting you know my nipples hurt like there's always something going on that's distracting wait till I have mine you're gonna be like oh no shut up I'll be like guys I got this flutter you'd be like in there done that no not at all it'll be a relief for someone else to talk about the same shit for a change and also I don't know if we've mentioned it but Matt is gonna be filling in on radio yeah so the one thing I am taking maternity leave from is radio so I've got the rest of the year off pretty much I think I'm coming back for a week in December must be nice I know I left you I'm stuck with your husband I gave you my husband so Matt's gonna fill in on the pickup radio show so that'll still go in the sundays you'll still hear the normal radio show and

i will hear the best of too and it will be brit and matt just doing it together i guarantee you'll be on that you'll get so much fomo you'll just turn up one day you'll be like i just wanted to come in and do a break do you know what i'm worried about though my big that will be better than you no my biggest fear is that matt is going to tell every story like he's gonna share so okay i'm having a couple of weeks off post-birth and then i'll come and tell you guys matt's on lockdown He is going to go on Two Dotting Dads and tell everything. He has to be on lockdown. He gave away Brit's wedding date.

He gave away Poppy's name-z middle and first. No, Matt's locking it down. We're on lockdown. And do you know what he said to me? And he said this so casually. He was like, God, babe, you know what? Our downloads have been so up recently. And I was like, yeah, because you keep giving away things

that are not yours to tell. And he goes, you know what our most downloaded episode was? And I was like, which one? And he's like, the one where people think that we gave away the date of Britt's wedding. Yes. But he did edit it. Like it did get edited out, but people still go looking

for like what he said. I actually got a couple messages about this because back when Matt and Ash started the podcast, I did do their audio edits, but I haven't done that for, oh, it'd have to be like a year and a half now. And so some people are like, why didn't Keisha flag this? Why didn't Keisha cut it out? Like I got messages personally being like,

why didn't you cut it out though? Like, you know what I mean? You're not to blame, Keisha. You're not to blame. Matt does still work on the video edits, so now I'm like hoping that anytime he does say something that could be on the nose that Ness is going to give me a heads up and let me know. No, Matt needs to understand right now I run this show

and I am the boss. He is a filling. He is a substitute. I call the shots and he will not be giving anything away. Trust me. You have that on record. I am running the shots. You know he has his own podcast he's going to tell the stories on.

It's not a bad one. Well, he can do what he wants there. I can't control that, obviously, because he gave away my wedding. But I can control the radio show. It's an absolute no-go zone. laura we love you we're so happy for you i'm so happy our life is about to be turned upside down i cannot wait to meet sloppy poppy poppy i'm really excited please don't call her that i cannot wait to meet poppy pearl we cannot wait to meet her it's huge news in our little life

uncut family we are making another edition and i can't wait to hear the news i'll be patiently looking at my phone every morning when i wake up on do not disturb can you no can you please stop putting your phone on do not disturb just in case i need to call you No, you can just call twice or push the notification. You know you're in labor. Just make sure that you call twice and push the notification. I did call Britt on like a Saturday night at 10.30 and she did not answer or call me back.

And I was like, you're an unreliable birthing partner. She's been watching The Summer I Turned Pretty. Yeah, sorry. I don't even answer Ben. She's been ignoring Ben. I know I already said it, but I just want to say the biggest thank you to everyone. I will be back shortly.

Thank you for all of the well wishes. Hopefully everything goes well and I will have a tall tale to tell in the next couple of weeks. and Keisha passing the baton. You'll be sitting in this chair that I've pissed in several times in a week or two. Can we call that the,

is that the episode title? Can it be a tale, Laura's tale, tale to tell, a birth story? That will be next, that's the next episode I'm on. This one's just like,

see you guys. No, that's what I mean, the next one. This one we're calling Push It Real Good. Yeah. Alright, you know the drill. Okay, to your mum,

to your dad, to your dog, to your friends and share the love because we love love! Thank you.