Life Uncut - Spank Me Matty! Ask Laura and Matt!

Episode Date: July 5, 2026

Hey Lifers! Matt is back; dragged in, as per tradition, to cover the holiday break. They kick off with the state of Matt's chest hair, a debrief on Laura's ten days in India while Matt solo parented three kids and the homecoming argument that kicked off. Then your questions!Have they ever considered divorce? Matt's answer is a roast chicken analogy. Do they both orgasm every time? Does Laura's ambition test Matt's patience? And there's the small matter of the Daily Mail article after Matt went on a podcast and casually mentioned that they're drowning in debt. They also get into living with nana, what Matt's tattoos actually mean, whether they'd ever do couples therapy and the vasectomy update. TIMESTAMPS 0:00 — Matt's back! The half-shaved chest, the India debrief and the homecoming argument 14:15 — How they argue, who apologises first and have they ever considered divorce? 23:30 — The public eye, the Daily Mail debt headline and The Bachelor legacy 33:50 — Laura's ambition, the busyness-anxiety link and would they do couples therapy? 48:20 — Baby number four, the vasectomy update and the pull out method consequences Want more from Matty J? Listen to our other eps here:Ask Uncut with Laura & Matt! Apple | SpotifyA Matty J Special: Apple | SpotifyUNCUT WITH MATTY J - A mans perspective! Apple | SpotifySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

does everyone jump out yeah it's just us wanna fuck i mean if we don't do it now i won't do it for like another month on the weekend honey we'll do it on the weekend hi guys and welcome back to another episode of life on cart i'm laura i'm maddie jay oh isn't It's so nice. My wonderful husband has joined me in studio today to do an episode of Ask Young. Beg me. Beg.

Some might say. There are so many places I'd rather be right now. Actually, sorry. Name me one. I'm happy to be here. Name me one. It's good to be back. When was the last time I was on Life Uncut?

The last time we had a holiday. Every time we need to fill some holiday ad spaces, we just wheel you out. that does not make me feel valued or needed at all you are whenever we're desperate we call on you no it's because brit's currently on holidays and technically we're on holidays but when we're on holidays we're together brit i've seen far too much of the mediterranean i get it the water's beautiful it's an aqua color like nothing else but i've seen enough you're bored i i've seen enough there's a few more beaches that haven't been shown yet god how much more of the med do

we have to put up with you're just jealous and so am i so jealous totally raging jealous totally i'm there making a fucking jam sandwich in the morning i look over at my phone and brit's there on a fucking yacht in the med i'm like can i say though it's very nice to be back behind a microphone with you i love you i love you too and this is for anyone who is really unsure no wonder this is an ask us anything episode it's ask uncut but these questions can i be really annoying yeah your mic is very it's hiding your face and you've got such a beautiful face it would be a damn shame if your mic was covering it thank you thank you so much for solving that problem i take my shoes off yeah make yourself at home can i take my pants off

you get halfway into this in the studio so the team aren't looking anymore they're like they've gone off if you you guys probably don't know this but like we record now in like a studio room and our producing team go outside and they look in through a window it's very voyeuristic so they're sitting outside at a desk looking in and we're just in the room by ourselves in the chairs so like they're in the cuck chairs and like we could do anything in here five minutes in they're all like on their phones no one's paying any attention oh yeah we pay them just to sit there and be on facebook so whoever has to edit this they'll look back oh my god that laura fucked laura was giving that a blowjob at the seven minute mark for two and a half

minutes it was the best two and a half minutes of your life god damn it oh that's about right that's about all it takes okay so we did a call out for you guys and we said i said no hold bars but that's not a word it's no holds barred ask us anything we will answer all your questions it doesn't matter how deranged or unhinged they are and i just want you all to know that some of you were sick. I know that I say that we'll keep them anonymous and we're never going to share who you are with everyone else, but I can see who you are. So to the person who asked if Matt and I like to piss on each other and some of the other questions that we got asked, yeah, you took it there and I'll decide whether or not we answer it. Let's get into it.

Have we, what was that? We've never peed on each other, if that's what you're about to ask me. We had the sexologist. So a little while ago, we had a sexologist on the podcast. And do you Remember I came home and I was like, Laura, we can, you know, we can mix things up. We can, you know, we can do things that we've always wanted to do, but. No, you came home and you said, hey babe, do you want our sex life to be more like risque? Like, do you like, do you want me to spank you or, I don't know. And you were like, dirty talk.

And you said, I don't like that. And I'm like, well, how would you know if you've never tried it? And you're like, I've done it. And I was like, but with who? And you're like, I mean, because I forget that you've had other boyfriends. I subliminally block it out. And then you were like, I used to like getting whipped. And I was like, oh, that's right.

Laura had a life before me. Yeah. And I want to do the whipping. We can whip. You said you don't like it. Well, no, I like a little bit of that stuff, but like. What? Well, why aren't we whipping then?

Do you want to do that? I don't know. Just to mix it up. I don't think you'd be really that into it. We're just belly to belly. That's all we ever do. Speaking of bellies, Matt yesterday went into the bathroom. So Matt yesterday goes into the bathroom and I really love Matt with a hairy chest.

Like it's my favorite. Him with a hairy chest is so attractive to me. I never want him to like clip or shave it. Matt prefers to have a shaved chest. I don't like it. It feels weird with it being really hairy. Well, it's like a constant kind of, I guess, like to and fro that we have, because I find Matt the sexiest when he has full hairy chest and every so often he's like, I'm back.

And he's like, she officially clippeted it in the bathroom without me knowing. So he comes downstairs yesterday and he goes, so I tried to clip on my chest, but my razor ran out of battery. And I can't find the charger. Why don't you just show everyone who's watching on YouTube what you did to yourself? He just shaved around his belly button. zoom in on that my lower my lower like third of my torso is shaven and I've like got one ass cheek that's also shaven and half a ball sack yeah literally

all right well look before we get into answering all the questions that you have sent through this is kind of also a bit of an update so I've just been in India for the last 10 and a half days Matt's been solo parenting and having the best time of his life how was it for you it was great did you have a good time it was good it was actually okay it's a bit of a blur it went really quick it really did yeah you feel like you're lying because that's not the version that i've received thus far no i think do you know what the kids overall were pretty amazing and i got to give a special shout out to poppy because i lied to you a couple of times the first few nights because i'm such a heavy sleeper she woke up and you slept through it who's tonight

i mean normally you wake up first right and it's not because i'm you know neglectful it's just because i'm you know it's not my fault because i'm asleep and i was thinking to myself like okay you know i'm sure that my body will know that you're not in the bed that it's just on me so any noise i'll be much more i'll be hyper aware you know first couple of nights i'd wake up at like 6 30 in the morning not by anyone else but just because i would wake up because i was you know my body clock was up and i was like oh fuck not one noise from poppy was poppy just like awake with a little cup anybody and i was like oh my gosh and i i wasn't sure and then you messaged me And you said, how's Poppy sleeping?

And I was like, yeah, she was up a couple of times. Why? Why lie? It does make you feel like more of a hero. I was more impressed. I just didn't want you to worry. Okay. I wasn't worried.

This is one thing that I think, and I see this meme that has been shared a few times, a reel that's been shared a few times. And it is like a mom who's meal prepping and everything for going away. And so it's okay. I'll describe to you. So she's like meal prepping and everything. and she says these are all the things I do to prepare my husband for when I go away for a girl's weekend and it kind of is just this shot of her doing a meal prep and putting away laundry

and doing all these different things and then the music cuts and it's her with sunglasses on like you know giving the middle finger and she's like fucking nothing because I didn't marry a loser and that is probably how I feel about going away I mean I know it would probably be nice for me to prep a few more things but like i feel so one meal would have been great laura like a frozen spaghetti bolognese would have been so helpful and you were like lol you're not a fucking loser you don't need it and i was like help me i'm so grateful that i can like go away and do a work trip in india for 10 days and not have to worry about you being competent enough to take care of the kids for that length of time and not having to worry about and probably quite young knowing

that like you've got it and you're fine even if you are a heavy sleeper also you know very lucky to have a lot of help but it's also it's so fucking unfair the difference between men and women you know when people know you know talking about the school community when they know there is a dad where the partner the mom has gone away everyone is like are you going to be okay you know people people like i can take a child should i take my people like bringing around food hampers like I've died literally literally like we're so sorry Laura's gone she's gone for 11 days but people I had like the mums from the school were cleaning the house I was watching tv and were they no they weren't why were the mums in our house but they were just all the single mums

that are divorced were cleaning the house I know like drop off and pick up they're all like oh my god how are you how are you doing are you okay are you surviving and I was like yeah like things are good and they're like oh my god like you're a hero and it's so unfair because when mums are by themselves it's just like it's the norm well I'm glad that there is like I'll take it though I'll take the sympathy don't worry I don't want that to stop but I did think to myself because there are other mums who I know have had like two-week stints where their partner's gone overseas the man's not there and I'm now like I wish you know I should be more helpful and be like look I'll take little Charlotte and have a play day yeah and I'll go wash your car or something whatever

helps you won't but I love how and you were working hard you were working hard I'm not going to dispute that but you were like oh it's so hot over here and oh like you know it's it's such hard work and oh the business class flight was so long on the way home 12 hours in a Qantas business suite oh it was horrible it was horrible I was like shut shut the fuck up the flight was amazing thank you the flight was amazing but i guess like one of the things when i go away for work and especially going to india peak middle of summer it's not a holiday and so it's easy for it to be dismissed as being like a luxurious time away it doesn't feel a luxurious time away when you're like going from factory visit to meetings to like suppliers in 43 degree heat it is a full

on period of time to get work done i agree picking diamonds is really fucking hard but shut up that's awful i wouldn't wish that upon my worst enemy honestly wow sitting sitting there in aircon going going through diamonds like geez wow wow what what you've had to endure so hard is just awful and the fact you've come back in one piece i don't know how you've done it i'm so i'm so glad that you finally see it from my perspective you're right yeah i'm very proud though i'm proud of myself can i say one thing though we do have the agreement in our household that whoever has the kids does have a harder time like it is infinitely harder to be parenting without any support or to be parenting solo or you know i

mean we're very grateful that we have nana like you said but parenting is a harder job than going to work yes always yes unless you're in india and it's really hot yeah there were a couple times where it was tough like there was one night in particular where the juggling act i think the hardest part the hardest window of parenting is the dinner bath bed routine with three kids nana love her to death she works so hard and she's at the moment she's waking up at like 3 a.m so by the time it gets to six o'clock in the evening she's exhausted she's also 74 74 i can have a nap in my mind she's still 40 you're like mom carry this she's like i can't literally oh my god she's doing so well she's amazing and there was one night where poppy just wouldn't go down

marley and lola were being really super cheeky and finally you know it was the last step before i you know poppy had gone down i was like pleading with marley and lola to go to bed and i just sat at the end of the bed and i was just like oh like head and hands broken and lola was patting me on the back and she goes don't worry daddy you're doing a good job and mom's going to be home real soon i was being comforted i was like thanks lola i needed that she was like hang in there pal speaking of lola do you know what she said to me this morning i think you have some explaining to do she goes dad said i could have a brownie i was like this morning yeah at like 6 a.m 7 no 7 a.m she was like mom dad said i could have a brownie and i was like what where

are you going to get a brownie from and she goes he said i could get it from my bum i did for the record i did not say that loli you cannot eat your own feces i will not allow it he said i'll get it fucking knows i'll get it from my bum she knows five that you can ask me anything in the morning ask me anything before 7 a.m and i'll agree to it because you're asleep because you remember she was eating the cocoa pops on monday morning yeah it's because she asked me at 6 45 fuck you and i was like yep absolutely she could ask me for a vodka and i'd be like make it a double before 7 a.m you can ask me whatever you like and she fucking knows that all right well i'm gonna keep that in my back pocket as well please ask away all right well speaking of ask

away let's get into your questions what did you miss most about me when i was away for 11 days i mean no laura this morning you're no i won't say that go on say it no i was joking say it No. Say it. They're all listening now. The team are listening. What did you miss most? I miss laughing together.

We have a very good time together. We're always having a chuckle about something. I miss you being silly, which is why when I came home and you were in such a terrible mood for a couple of days, I was quite upset by it. I was in a terrible mood? For the record, for the record, we have gotten over this, so it's fine. We love each other now. But you did one load of washing and you're like, you don't appreciate anything that I do here. That is so untrue.

I cleaned all your clothes away. I unpacked all your luggage because you did to Melbourne. And you ruined my shirt. I cleaned the entire house. I took the kids. I did everything for the two days. I've had them for 11 days going on 12. And you just had to say thank you.

That was it. That was the entire argument. The argument wasn't about anything. It was that I was so grateful. And I was like, just to thank you for the things that I've done for you would be nice. But instead you were like, I deserve it because I'm suffering. I've been long suffering with... Tara, sorry.

Let's not start this argument. I love you. I love you. One of the questions was, do we ever argue? The answer is no. Actually, yeah. One of the questions was, when you're mad at each other, how long until you're over it or you make up?

We are very quick to make up. Matt's a little bit more grudgy than I am. Oh, fuck off, I am. Matt does hold a grudge for a little bit longer. like you usually apologize first like you'll come for a cuddle do you know okay sorry let me finish you'll come for a cuddle first but i get over things pretty quickly whereas i feel like it takes you a day or two and interestingly i think you and your mom are very similar like your mom even if once like you guys have like made up or whatever there's like residual whereas i'm like

by the next day i've just forgotten i can't remember where i put my fucking shoes that what we are arguing about like i just can't keep tabs my brain doesn't do that so yeah i feel like We have the same fight style. So, like, we both expect an apology from the other person. I want to grovel. We both want an apology, but we both are at a point where neither of us want to apologize because we're still both frustrated. But then we always calm down very quickly and then get over it.

I don't know if everyone is like this, but it's so hard to be wrong. No one wants to be wrong. No one wants to be wrong. Very hard. Saying sorry is very difficult. I also think, and I wonder whether you feel like this as well. often when people get defensive because they've upset the other person it's because you don't want to have upset the other person that wasn't your intention right like so like I never go

about my day thinking oh I want to upset my husband have been a couple of times where I was like this will piss her right off you fucking love antagonizing me sometimes you get a real kick out of trying to get a fucking rise out of me and then I give you a rise and you're like oh why are you angry I've got like a stick and I'm poking her like a tiger and I'm like come on give me something. And then you bite back and I'm like, Whoa, you're crazy. Sorry. I have to, I will be more aware of that. But I would say that most of the time people get defensive because they don't want to actually have to take responsibility for hurting the other person. You know, like that's kind of, and so it's easier to be like, you know, you're wrong about the way

that you feel than what it is to be like, Oh, actually, sorry. And you know, I think we always come around to it very, very quickly, but these are all things we're working on. We're not a perfect couple guys we're doing our best no I think this will will always be I think as much as we have little agreements I think the resolution is always swift very swift which is one thing that I would not want to ever change okay actually which leads me to my next question have you ever considered divorce which someone someone wrote in I won't say their name I was like should like should we be considering it no we haven't I haven't considered it yet no it's okay that came out wrong uh the answer is no you're like I might consider it in the future no I've never

considered divorce and divorce for me is not even remotely an option I think I come from a family where there's been so much divorce that I feel as though I really took my time to choose to get married in the first place so like because I don't want to ever no one wants to ever end up divorced like of course but it doesn't really feel like that's something that has ever been tabled in my mind as an option, even remotely. And also you're my best friend. Why the fuck would I want to get divorced? Can I give you an analogy? I'd love one. Is it got food in it? Absolutely. I think knowing how good we've got it now, it's like having this delicious roast chicken meal. And it's, it would be like, if someone said, have you considered another meal? And I'm like,

well, why would I, I've got everything I could ever want in this meal right now with my chicken. so you know I've got my vegetables I've got my gravy I've got my chicken I got my like crispy skin I've got everything I could ever want and I'm so happy with my meal right now so and I think it would be such a shame to get to a point where I'm no longer enjoying the chicken okay I think I'm really flattered what about dessert that's the mistress don't get divorced you know it's like knowing how happy we are now to get to a point where if we did consider divorce and you're like oh like we had it so good yeah I like it's not not even remotely ever something that I've considered I am so grateful for what we have in our relationship and I'm so grateful for our family

unit I'm so grateful for the relationship we have with our kids for how you parent for how I parent And I think that we are so on the same page with everything apart from like the tiny 0.05% when we bicker, but like every relationship, and also like every relationship is going to have that because if you don't have that, then there is nothing to ever like resolve or work towards or work through and like have conversations that like have some disagreements. The bickering is just the Brussels sprouts. They've got to be there. You got, you got to have them.

You can't not have them on the plate. Right. Yeah. I don't love the Brussels sprouts, but I'll still eat them anyway because you've got to finish the meal. And then how much more do you appreciate the roast chicken once you've eaten the Brussels sprouts? That's it. When I get to that chicken breast, I'm like, fuck yeah. Woo!

Okay. So, yeah, I think we're very much on the same page. But I also think that if we ever got to a point where even I had considered it or you had considered it briefly, it would be such a heartbreaking thing to discuss simply because so much would have had to have decayed to even have gotten there that like we would have had to have neglected our relationship so much that there would be such a big responsibility that we would have to take to acknowledge the fact that we didn't prioritize each other and I don't think that we would do that yeah that's my I mean that's how I feel I agree love you my darling I love you too oh cute okay next question have you

got veneers who I don't know but there was a question that came through asking if either of have veneers no we don't have veneers someone once messaged me and said oh wow i'd never noticed your snaggle tooth before i was deeply offended if i did have veneers they'd be the shittiest veneers you'd want to get a fucking refund because they're not teeth aren't that great they're bloody yellow can i say your teeth aren't yellow but you have had so about eight years ago matt went to the dentist and he got invisalign so you know when you get invisaligns you get all the little knobs put on your teeth normally takes like a year a year and a half tops yeah so like you get those little buttons put on your teeth and then you wear your Invisalign and then

The mouth guards, they change like every four weeks and they slowly move your teeth to be perfect. Yeah. And then after you've finished the course, you get those little knobs taken off and then you go about your merry life with straight, beautiful teeth. All I have to do is call the dentist and book an appointment and it's taken me four years and I still haven't done it. So bad.

So Matt still has, even though you've been to the dentist, you just have the knobs on your teeth. Like you never have gotten them taken off. wear the mouth guard at nighttime otherwise the teeth move back how old is the mouth it's fucking that's why i don't wear it as much because it stinks babe that's not okay it's so old there was also a question here as to whether i've got the ick but yeah if i can do now sorry can you sort your tooth out you rotate her out i'll do it when i have time okay here's one laura yes do you ever get sick of being in the public eye and putting out content all the time yes yeah absolutely

Yeah. I go through waves of it. Like I'm so grateful. I am so, so, so grateful for everything that we have and like for the fact that people care about what we're doing and that, you know, we had the ability to share that we've had this podcast, that we have our lifers, that we, all of it. Like I am endlessly grateful, but I am also at times totally exhausted by ever feeling like, oh, I've got to put a reel out just to like feed the algorithm. You know, like sometimes, sometimes it's not about because I've got something that I feel is really worthy of sharing or I feel as though I have anything of interest and so in those moments where I don't feel inspired it feels like I'm just doing it because it's like a job that has to be done and that's when I don't

enjoy it but like these conversations and also like being able to like chat with my best friends like that I love but you know you know that sometimes we will talk about social media and I'll be like, I just wish that I could go and live on a farm and have a vegetable patch and never, ever, ever look at my phone again. You get so bored. You get so bored. I think the job that we have is so incredible. Yeah, we're very lucky.

So lucky. But like anything, you know, that the, the pressure only comes from, you know, sometimes there are moments where there's peaks and troughs and in the troughs, you're trying to find some inspiration. And, you know, sometimes I can write little skits and do three in a day. And sometimes I'm like absolutely scraping the barrel. And when you're scraping the barrel, you're like, oh, fuck, this is hard. Any job over time, you know, we've been doing it for bloody.

10 years. 10 years. We're the old people now. But also, yeah, I think that that's probably the biggest takeaway, right? Any job that you do is a job. Like, and so at some point there is a work element to it. And so like, I fucking love my jobs and I have quite a few of them and I wouldn't do them if I didn't love them.

I'm very fortunate and lucky that I've been able to choose what I want to do in my careers. And like, there's, I shouldn't say that sometimes I love it, sometimes I don't, but there are aspects of it that sometimes I don't love. And I think that the part that maybe sometimes I like less is when things that I've said have been misinterpreted. So like things that I've maybe shared or I've joked about on the podcast and then, you know, they've been picked up and interpreted in a certain way, which actually leads me to something that I wanted to talk to you about.

Oh God. So recently Matt did a podcast. You didn't tell me you were doing this podcast, but you went and did a podcast, Home Beautiful, and talked about the renovation down that we did at the South Coast Home. So do you know what? It had been a long time, a long time. I was starting to I was it was like a toxic relationship between myself and the Daily Mail a long time since they'd written an article about me so on the one hand I was like this is nice

on the other hand I was like they don't care about me anymore exactly exactly and then all of a sudden someone I got a couple of messages and people were saying you're back in the Daily Mail and I was like what for what have I done now wait for it okay so Matt goes and does this podcast for Home beautiful and for some reason you and this is like okay this is like the thing that sometimes when you're doing media interviews or you're talking to any kind of like podcasting or journalists or whatever you have to be careful with how you word things knowing knowing that there's going to be articles that come off the back of it your radar for that sometimes you prefer to go for the joke and you don't care about the consequences it wasn't that bad i was like

we're in a lot of debt right now so you the house costs a lot of money as did the reno you will always go for like the humor and then like deal with the consequences so you made the joke on there you were like yeah we're drowning in a mountain of debt someone better i'm not joking though that is that is the truth you were like we had to rent out our house god like we have to get some people in there to pay off the mortgage which is not the case yeah it is no um laura i don't know if you've seen our mortgage but it's very high but it's debt that we can handle it's fine we're not drowning in debt everyone and the way in which could do with a life raft though if someone could throw one at us please the way in which you said it in this fucking podcast

interview okay so then daily mail writes this absolute dream of a headline maddie j and laura burn forced to rent out dream home a big mountain of debt and then it's an entire article which is just talking about us drowning in debt it makes us sound like we're going bankrupt we're fine we are so fine everyone no one's worried about us i know but i'm just wanted to put it out there everyone's got debt it's actually one of the most truthful articles i've written from daily mail i had no issue with it people like this is outrageous and i was like is it it's actually not a bad article I was actually like well done finally they're telling the truth I sent it to Matt and I was

like can you fucking stop and you were like what's wrong there's nothing you're like that's not a bad article I got no issue with that at all I stand by my comments if anyone wants to stay at shantmer.com.au check availability oh dear we're pretty booked up now anyway I had a good laugh so yeah look sometimes I think the thing that I dislike the most is when things are taken out of context or in your instance taken perfectly in context but also like I just think the amount of work that you do is is incredible like it's so much so I think there's moments where you're like oh this is too much just because you got so much on your plate yeah yeah that's probably the case but like I definitely want to reiterate how grateful I am I know I said

it but like how much I love the jobs I do I love all of them hence why I do them doesn't happen often but fuck me when someone asks for a photo it's lovely that's my ego talking right now it's I live for that moment that is great people like I'm so sorry and I'm like thank you I needed this like I was having a flat morning and this is what is picking me up right now to the point where I'm like where are you going next they're like they're like okay we're gonna go now you're Like, can I follow you on Instagram? What's your handle? I love it.

I do too. It's really nice. Sometimes people will come up and ask Matt for a photo and I think that they're about to ask me and I get really excited. Anyway, let's continue. I want to ask you something spicy. Do you both orgasm every time? Sorry, love you, laughing face and love heart.

Who's that from? Nana. Why is she laughing at me? Bailey Johnson wanted to know if we're both, she cares about our relationship and the longevity. I would say, I'd say for you, Laura, it's about like 80% of the time. No, I would say every time. Okay, good. Yeah.

I was hoping you'd say that. I wasn't quite sure. I mean, for you it's 100% of the time. That's when we know it's ended. Yes. Yeah. So yes. I mean, yes, yes, yes, we are.

Very good. I'm glad we covered that. I'm having a great time, sweetheart. I mean, I'm very lucky in that you, like, you're very. Easy. Yes. I'm trying to think of how do I say this. You're like, how do I tell my wife that she's an easy come?

Well, we just did. Can't wait for that Daily Mail headline. Like, I know for some people it takes a lot longer and for Laura. Oh, I'm a cheap thrill. I got a sneeze and then that's it. And I'm like, oh, job done. Yeah. No, I'm good.

I'm wham bam. Thank you, man. I'm a busy woman. I got work to do. Actually, do you know how I know? Because then she giggles afterwards. No one needs to know that information. Okay, moving along.

That's sharing too much. It's a big giggle. It's like a laugh, like a big old lol. And I remember at the start, I was like, what's happening? And she's like, oh, that's just what happens. I would love to know if anyone else does this. Does anyone else ever laugh after having an orgasm? It's a rush of hormones.

How do you know this? I don't know. I've got no idea. Don't ask me. All right. What was the worst thing that came out of The Bachelor and do you hate still being attached to it? The worst thing to come out of The Bachelor?

Yeah, the worst thing. I don't know. I don't really think – I can't think of an answer to that one. Do you still hate being attached to it? I mean, sometimes if you're working on something and they refer to you as, oh, it's Matty J from The Bachelor, and I'm like, there's so much more to me than that. I've been on Play School.

I've been on Play School, did a movie. I've got my podcast. sometimes I think a lot of people just know me as that's all I've ever done yeah I think it's an interesting one there is nothing negative for me that came out of The Bachelor because all the negatives have been so overshadowed by the incredibleness that like to even they don't even warrant a mention you know what I mean I would say the only negative and I've talked about this before but like I became quite insecure post The Bachelor so it was the first time that I had ever really cared about the way I looked. And that was because of negative commentary.

I think before that I was relatively self-assured and then I went through a period of feeling quite insecure, which I've definitely am on the other side of now. So like that to me was just a flash in the pan, but overarchingly like our entire lives changed because we did the show, we met each other, we have our family, we've had so many opportunities that have come off the back of it. Like I will forever be grateful for what that has done to my life and for how that just absolutely just flipped my life on its head and then to answer the second question of that of like is it annoying to be forever attached to it the only time like what you said matt the only time that it's annoying is when you are completely reduced to just being that and not ever being

anything else and it's annoying but it's not so annoying that it's something that i care about you know like it doesn't bother me it's a privilege that what we got to experience was a privilege and And I felt quite upset when it got cancelled. Yeah. When they took it off Channel 10. I was like, oh, that's a damn shame. It's an end of an era. That's for sure.

Well, I mean, you can now watch The Golden Bachelor on Channel 9, so it's still around. Just in a different format. Who's watching that? All right. Look, have you ever had a time in your relationship where you thought that you weren't going to make it? No. You've never had a time that we've been together where you've thought this is not going to

work out? No. Never? Not once, I don't think. Oh, I love that. Maybe the beginning at some point. When? What happened?

There's nothing that stands out, but I've always had this level of confidence with this relationship that this is always going to be the one. End game. So, I mean, maybe will we have a couple of heated arguments? Oh my God, stop it. Maybe for a split second, I'm like, is she the one? Don't you love it when you're so filled with rage because you're having an argument that you're like, I fucking hate you.

And then you're like, oh, actually, I love you a lot. yeah it's that's just anger yeah maybe for a split second but no i'm yet to we're yet to have a moment where i've really questioned like the lifespan of the relationship actually when you told me you like being spanked and i wasn't the one doing any spanking i was like maybe this isn't going to work out we can always do some spanking there's always a solution someone says does laura's ambitious nature test your patience this feels like a therapy session does it test my patience sometimes yeah more how does it make you feel no I just feel like you are someone and I'm the same as this I remember as a kid as an example I would always say yes to every opportunity and

one of my first jobs was working at Macca's and if ever they call me and said hey can you fill a shift didn't matter what day what time obviously school but I'd say yeah I'll do it that's the sort of person that you want to employ like you're a good employee you're a hard worker I love work I'm born to work and I think you're similar and that any opportunity that comes your way you'll find a way to make it work we both struggle saying no to things and sometimes I'm like Laura you've got enough on your plate right now like there is enough going on that you don't need to take on anything more and you will say yes to it and we find a way to make it work but sometimes I'm like there's enough here but I also say no to things as well and that's I think it's important

to at least recognize that like we've had some big work opportunities that have come along or have been presented and I have said I wouldn't even entertain it because of the impact it would have on our family so like there definitely have been as many things that we say yes to we've also said no to stuff and you're the same like you know there's been other work things that have popped up and you're like the conditions around what I would need to do in order to do this job are not conducive for our family and so we're not going to do it like ultimately i think we both the most important thing to us is our relationship and our kids and making sure that we are able to still prioritize our family unit neither of us are going to take a job that the other person is like you

can't do that like that's this is going to be too much pressure for us and for our family and sometimes i just want more laura yeah i just want laura for myself i mean who can blame you and and I don't want to share her with anyone. One thing for me, and we've, I've talked about this a little bit just recently on the podcast. I think that my feelings of being successful are linked to constantly like achieving. Like, I think that that's something that I need to work on. Like, I don't feel as though I am, I get anxiety when I'm being idle and when I'm

not doing enough, I feel as though I am not worthy. Laura wants to be in a constant state of like heightened anxiety. Cause it makes me feel, it makes me, it's familiar. It's what's familiar to me. And I know that this all stems from childhood stuff where like. Laura's cruise control is like in the fifth gear, redlining, and the engine's like. And Laura's like, ah, this is comfortable.

I said to Matt recently, I had had a bit of a lull with work and like not in terms of like work drying up or anything, but just like it was a quiet period. Careful what you say, Laura. Those articles will come out. Laura, work is drying up under a mountain of debt. fucking rich of you to have a go at me the words that you're putting out just think before you speak laura you started this fucking beast you're the problem so i had a like a more quiet a couple

of weeks my anxiety has never no my anxiety has never been worse and i said to matt like i am so anxious at the moment and you were like what's wrong and i was like i think it's just that i'm not busy like i need to be busy because the busyness is what keeps my mind quiet and when I'm not busy and I have idle time to think it's when I spiral depressed like I'm not depressed but like I feel way more negative emotions than what I should feel when I'm like running at 100 miles an hour and it's like kids and then I've got you and I've got work and everything's like bang bang bang bang bang and I don't have time like all my decision making is quick because I don't have time to like you know look through multiple options for anything so I'm like that

will do yes that will do yes that's when i feel most calm in my brain that's it's crazy right i need therapy yeah oh yeah you do yes would you ever do couples therapy yeah okay let's do it book it in all right this question came in and it said how do you settle arguments or argue and also how do you have intimacy and sex when you live with your mother-in-law well we just closed the door of the bedroom you know we don't like share a bed with her she does have her own bedroom yeah it's not like Nana's there on the floor in a mattress as Laura and I are having sex but like sorry Nana we'll be quick give us five minutes to be fair she's at the other end of the house and like yeah she's downstairs at the other end of the house do you think she can hear us

I don't know I'm quiet during sex man I like well we've learned to be quiet because we're on the same level as children so we don't want to wake the kids up so like I think that's why I'm quiet otherwise i'd be fucking roaring spanking all over the place how do we have arguments your mom's very good if we're having like a bicker or an argument she's like i'll go to my room with a cup of tea yeah she makes herself a cup of tea and she just walks away she never gets involved she doesn't try and like unless we're like talking about parenting things with the kids and that's when she kind of like will chime in and we kind of discuss those things together because she has an impact and an impact on the parenting since we all co-parent but if it's just us talking about

relationship stuff she's very good at making herself scarce don't you think yeah yeah I think it's been amazing to me like I love living with Ellie she's wonderful we all get along really really well and I grew up living with my grandparents so I really wanted that for our kids because I think that intergenerational households provide something really valuable for kids as well and they have a greater relationship with their grandparents and more respect for their grandparents and all of that sort of stuff so like I love it you know and the small inconveniences of having an extra person in the house are nothing in comparison to like how much of a benefit it is having her there so I love it how do you find living with your mom

living with my mom I will advocate for it I think and I I'm so lucky in that I think I've seen other grandparents who aren't very hands-on and my mom is someone who is extremely hands-on like she loves being a grandma she loves being a grandma her life revolves around helping our family helping the kids and we joked about it before I keep forgetting that she's 74 she's bloody odd when she had that little weekend away with her girlfriends she was like these are her friends that I've grown up with so I was like oh how is how is Heidi and how's Risa and she's like well you know she's got the bad knees and she's got the bad neck and everyone's got these ailments now that they're in their 70s and I have to always remind myself that my

mom isn't that young 40 50 year old mom she's 74 yeah it's crazy so i i think but she's a great 74 what she does you know we laura and i have to constantly yell at her to be like don't try and fucking empty the bin don't try and do that because you've done so much and it's now nine o'clock at night put your feet up and relax if she is the type of person that cannot sit still and so that's probably the one thing that becomes like a little bit frustrating at times is like when we've just finished dinner and we want to sit down and like watch tv and not get up and clean straight away your mom will get up and start cleaning and i'm like i am going to clean please sit down like we're not arguing over who's cleaning just sit down we kind of watch some tv

and then i'll clean we hugged higher she's on the floor of the living room watching a documentary just being like must clean now okay what is your favorite thing about each other so hard to pick one hey babe well it's because you're the package good save that's yeah i think the favorite thing would be so hard if you know you're with your partner as an example if they have an amazing sense of humor but then you didn't like the way they parented you know i think that would be so hard like it's we're so lucky and this is like really generic but we're so lucky that we're on the same page when it comes to how we prioritize a relationship to how we prioritize friendships and when I see you and your friends like I think you're a great friend oh this is such a like mushy

like you're amazing you're amazing people are like shut up get back to fighting we've been mean to each other the pretty much the entire episode so it's nice no I think we're just on so many different areas of how we view life and what's important we're on the same page as a partner, you know, the dream is that you can find someone who's going to make your life better and easier and more enjoyable. And I've fucking got that a hundred percent in all aspects of life. So it's really hard to be like, you know, just find one. Cause I think it's such a like pieces, two pieces of the puzzle coming together and fitting perfectly. Oh, that's really nice. You're my chicken dinner.

how would you feel if you found out a lifer died and had left their kids to you in their will how would i feel fucking a little bit concerned if i'm honest i love kids no if i had no connection whatsoever no connection so all of a sudden you just get two-year-old phone call someone's like hey there's a basket at the door with a baby in it Barbara is dead and her two children are now yours and here they are going to be like there's a knock on your door in a couple minutes that will be the children that you now have custody over gosh that's a lot of they put a lot of faith in us haven't they I'd have to say thank you but no thanks you can't say thank you I have yeah I'm so sorry I'm actually away at the moment

so if there's a knock on the door they'll be there for a while you put your phone on do not disturb i just i love kids i'm flattered it's very flattering like it's a very kind gesture i couldn't do it i'm done with kids you can't oh what do you mean like that's a that's a fair comment i i'm not gonna take on two random children all right i want them to have a safe and happy home to live in but not mine i can't afford to feed we're drowning in debt laura i can't afford more kids fucking hell okay i know i said that was the last question but this is actually the last question and it came up quite a few times you have been very vocal recently that you don't want a fourth kid yeah and i agree i think that four would be too much would i love

to have another baby sure yes yes i am so obsessed with poppy she is the most beautiful perfect angel baby that's ever fallen out of the sky the stork has never brought a better baby a calmer sweeter like just easier baby than poppy and i love all my children equally but in terms of like the difficulty of parenting she has been the easiest would you not agree 100 she's the dream she is just i walked into her bed so the other night i put her to sleep and she was just chatting away in her bed like blah blah blah blah blah and i was like she's just so happy and then an hour later she was doing it again i was like that's weird why isn't she asleep and then 11 o'clock she woke up again and she's just chatting away and i was like i'll just go and check on her

she just fully shit herself and was just so happy just didn't cry not a moment of tears mountain of shit she just was just swimming in shit just this hanging out thrilled didn't bother her one iota she is the most stoked kid about every single thing that ever happened she's just like whatever i'm in this cot this cot's great i'm covered in shit and it does what a joy it is to be alive it is easier to look at your relationship in a more positive light with your children when they are so easy yeah yeah i mean well there's nothing to feel like you have to overcome or like work through or there's no challenge like they're just like happy and i mean it's obviously not going to stay like this forever but right now you have a baby that doesn't sleep

at all it's really hard to love every second when you're just so exhausted and feeling anxious about every night time totally which is also why right now if you ask me could i have a fourth i'm like if she was a poppy i could have fucking 15 of them absolutely but i know that not everyone is a poppy so what was the question the question is you are so adamant that you don't want a fourth baby but now that we have three children you are very hyper aware of how children are made and how they come into the world have you yet had a vasectomy well you're talking to the guy who's had those nibs on his teeth for four years like it's going to be at least another three years before i call the vasectomy in yeah but you also know what's going to happen no no i will do it i will do it i spoke

to a dad at a party on the weekend and he recommended someone down the road. Great. And he was saying he's a great doctor, great surgeon. So I need to chase those details and I will do it, but just. Because currently we are just using the pullout method. It's definitely not worked well for us before. No, that's not true. I would like you to know.

Who, Marley or Marley? Which one was that? Marley was a pullout. No, no, Marley. Lola. Ah. Who knows? Actually, no, none of them were.

None of them were. They were all just like. I know what I'm doing. Yeah. We were just wheeling and dealing by that point. Yeah. I would like it to be known and you can put this on record daily mail, print it as a headline if you must.

If I get pregnant, we are having a fourth baby. So like, that's it. That's the reality. Is that a threat? What is that? No, it's just like. You're talking like you want to have a fourth. No, I'm saying that like, that is just how it.

So it's on me. Yeah, it's on you. Copy that. It's on you. Understood, loud and clear. And so if we do have a fourth baby and you're like, I didn't want to have a fourth. I'll be like, well, fucking pal, that's your problem.

Right. And that's how I'll say it. Thank you. Fucking pal. Anyway, guys, that's it from us. Great to be back. We are doing actually two episodes. So if you've enjoyed this episode, this is just part one of part two.

We are going to do an Ask Uncut where we answer your listener questions, not just introspectively answering questions about ourselves. So if you would like something a little bit more outward facing, that might be the episode for you. I can't wait. Can I stop for a little snack before we record again? because it's now creeping into my snack time. I love recording with you.

Thank you. That's a yes? Is that a yes or a no? Didn't quite answer my question. You can have a snack before we do episode number two. Thank you. Can't wait for the next one. Thanks for coming and being part of the pod.

Pleasure. Anyway, guys, you know the drill. Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friends and share the love because... We love... We love love. We'll be right back.