Life Uncut - The Best Of The Pick Up - Britt Is Now Into Sperm Racing

Episode Date: November 21, 2025

It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktokSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This episode was recorded on Camarago land. Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Brittany. My name is Maddie J. Matthew David Johnson, to be exact. Welcome to the show, Maddie JD. Hey, if you're just tuning in, this is our radio version of our podcast. We do normal podcast episodes, and then we have a national radio show. We package up all the best bits of the week and we drop it here. Just quickly, do I have to tell people that If they are becoming comfortable hearing my voice once a week, it's actually, it's only short term.

Yeah. My partner in crime, Laura, he's on maternity leave. Laura's also Matt's wife. What have we got here? Hang on. Let's look at the dates. One, two, maybe. Oh God.

It's soon. It's like three weeks. Yeah. And then the dream is over. Yeah. What a great time we've all had. It's been wonderful. We don't have to say goodbye now.

We can say goodbye in three weeks. I would hate to ruin people's Christmas. You want to breadcrumb it in that it's coming? I'm just planting the seed. and managing expectations. Imagine people mid-December and they're like, well, I can't enjoy Christmas now because Maddie's gone. Totally.

I get what you've done. Hey, last week we celebrated your third anniversary with Laura. Well, I just a couple of days ago had my very own anniversary. I call it the Bangiversary. Can I ask you a very personal question? Yeah. And if I'm crossing a line here, please tell me to shut up. You probably are, but it'll be normal.

Okay. Okay. Have you seen, there's a product. A long time ago, I was in a share house and one of the girls, her partner lived overseas and she actually got a mold of his downstairs region and turned that into a sex toy. That's weird. Just get a normal one. I don't need to mold it. So it's his exact replica. That's a nice touch. Don't you think? Isn't that? I don't think he'd want to put his willy in cement and like mold it up. I mean, I've done before with Laura and I have done We had the cast, not of our hands, but we did it of our feet, interlocked. You guys just get weirder and weirder.

Into a bucket. And I think it's actually, it's quite quick. It's quite quick. Just say Christmas is coming up, right? Ben, don't get any ideas. You go over to Italy and you have a beautiful Christmas morning together and he goes, hey, before we see the family, I want to give you something real special just for you.

And he gives you a box. Open the box. What is it? It's his willy. If he did it on his own, yeah, fine. But I'm never going to go and ask him to go and get his willy molded. Be honest to me right now. Yeah.

Would you want that? No. Okay. I absolutely wouldn't. But if Ben's asking you to ask me if I want that as a present. No, but I'm the same thing as you, right? I have multiple anniversaries. I thought you were going to say something else.

I have multiple anniversaries. I've got the anniversary that we thought it was just going to be hangs and bangs and never see each other again. Then we have the anniversary. I love, by the way, that at your wedding, you were talking as you are right now in front of all his family. You're like, I just thought I was going to fuck the guy, then leave. Oh, I did.

I said in my vows, end the speech. All the German relatives were like, oh, goodness me. That was a terrible German accent. That was terrible. But that's, that's very me. It's just a call spade to spade. And I did, I thought it was a one night stand and that was going to be it. So then we have that.

Then we have the anniversary when we actually got together. Then we have our anniversary for the engagement. No, that's not, that's not, that's nothing. Well, then we have our wedding anniversary and then we have another wedding anniversary. You've got two. Yeah. So this anniversary was- The Bali one's obviously the priority, right?

No, we've decided the other one. So we had two weddings, right? A big Bali wedding where everyone came. There were a hundred people. It was amazing. Then we had a really small one. The Bali one wasn't like a legal officiated. They don't recognize it as the wedding day, right?

No, it felt like the wedding day, but it wasn't. It was like a fake signing. And then we got married a couple of weeks later and that was real. and so we've decided to make the wedding can I say sorry for not coming to that one yeah you can

and a lot on okay sorry about that too much on for a wedding it was actually it was too last minute it was actually it was very last minute

it was you gave me like a week's notice no I actually think we planned that in about four days that was pretty miraculous I pulled off something amazing

but we've decided to go with that one because the date is too we went for the date the date's more memorable what's the can you tell me the date

or is that private Grace knows it's the 25th of the 6th 25. Grace knows. That is a good one. 2-5-6-2-5.

It would be rude not to pick that. 11-11-22. That's pretty good. Great. See, my other one was no one cares. This week. Well, can I just ask, sorry, Grace, your wedding date, if that's okay. It is 30th-03-24.

So not as strong. March 30th. Easter Saturday. People book weddings now off dates. It's like people try so hard just to get a particular date over something that's more meaningful to them because they just want to be able to remember it. My phone number is a very easy number to –

So is mine. What is it? It's like – Don't tell anyone. It's just full of twos and threes. Every time I tell someone, they're like – Hey, this week, finally, I've got something across the line. It is something I have felt very passionately about,

what I've wanted to talk about for a long time, produced to Grace and Matt. We've tried to roadblock this topic for so long until finally, after just weeks of pestering. We ran out of content. We said, fine, you can do this. You could almost say you put a condom on the chat. Would you say that?

I wouldn't have said that. I wouldn't have. I say that because we're talking about a new kind of race that is sweeping the nation. I don't think it is. I think one person's done it. But it's sperm racing. People are now raising their sperm.

I am fascinated by it and I just can't believe you guys haven't wanted to unpack it until now. And I'm going to tell you just a little bit of intel into the old Matty J, the young Matty J before he met Laura, before he was on The Bachelor, how I used to try and flirt at bars. I'll tell you how it was done. And I've passed this knowledge on now. This used to be in the inner sanctum under like lock and key.

I'm letting go of my secrets. I'm really glad you're letting go. I even gave one of my little flirting secrets in there. That's right. Yeah, visual as well. Yes, gosh. Don't ever use that anywhere. What a treat this episode is.

Britt, it's been a bit of a whirlwind of a week in my household. I don't know if you know this, but my mum had shoulder surgery to reattach ligaments. Quite a while ago, right? It was about 10 weeks ago. Yeah. And you may have heard of this. You might not have, but it's a virus called C. diff.

Yes. So C. diff is like a, they call it like a hospital virus. It's a hospital-born virus. And up until this point, I never ever heard of it, never knew it existed. I don't think people, I only know it because I worked in a hospital. I think generally people don't really know what it is. It's not something you hear a lot about. So my mum had the surgery.

She came out and as far as she knew, like she was totally fine. But then she had a really upset tummy that just wouldn't go away. And she was like, oh, you know, it's just something that's going to be, you know, here for, I'll get over in a couple of days. Bit of gastro. Yeah, no big, no big deal. But it got so bad and recently she was at home. I was out.

I was about to get the kids. Laura was at home with mum and she's like, oh, my stomach's a bit, you know, it's a bit upset and I got really bad cramps. And this has been 10 weeks of this, right? Yeah. 10 weeks of cramps. And Laura was like, well, I was about to go for a walk with Poppy, who's our newborn, but she goes, I'm just going to stay here

just in case. And then Laura messaged me and said, hey, I don't think your mom's doing too well. And it happens so quick. It can come on so strong. And I don't know if anyone's not experienced C. but this is how quickly things can change from being completely fine to being pretty scary. So Laura told my mom to just go have a lie down in bed. She did that. And within 10 minutes of my mom going into her bedroom, she makes out this moan. She calls out to Laura. Laura runs in and she goes, I don't think I'm doing very well. The color had completely gone from her. She was gray. Laura instantly called the ambos and they must have been at least six, maybe seven minutes. And in that time, my mom had gone from being able to say a few words, her blood pressure had dropped

so quickly because the virus is so aggressive that all of a sudden she was laying in bed unable to respond to anything that Laura was saying. Wow. In like six minutes? In six minutes. That's how aggressive this thing is. And we're so thankful that by chance the ambos were just around the corner and they came within the blink of an eye. And I can't help but think if Laura hadn't have listened and paid attention to my mum being unwell, I'd been a little bit cautious regarding the situation. If she wasn't there. And if she went for a walk and if no one was able to call triple zero,

it's so scary to think what might have been. My mum is 73 now, so she's no spring chicken. Yeah. And when you're a little bit older, you know, things can go from bad to worse so quickly. It's so scary, but especially because they haven't really been able to find out what's wrong with her, right, and treat it. Like they almost know what's wrong with her now,

but it's just not getting better. and it's been 10 weeks of like up and down and up and down. We've seen a few different specialists but I do want to give a shout out to one amazing doctor who was in the ER. Her name is Dr. Walsh and, you know, sometimes you come across a person who's just like she cared, she was just onto it and the moment I saw her and she came into the room and she started speaking to my mum, I was like, ah, this woman is a boss and she was just,

I'm so thankful that the doctor, we had her at that moment. She figured it out because you just, it's so scary when you're in a hospital when you just, you don't know. This world is so foreign and you just put your hands completely in someone else's. But if anyone is wondering, my mum has now returned from hospital. She is getting better. Okay, good.

Well, hopefully you've figured it out now. Well, she's being treated for C. diff and I'm now the messenger of C. diff. Yeah. And it's funny, I spoke about it on socials And so many people have messaged and reached out and said, oh, a family member also got C. diff off the back of surgery and no one knows about it.

And it's so common and it's so aggressive and it's so debilitating what it can do to you if it's not treated properly. Well, it needs a very specific treatment, which is why people can get sick for so long because people don't figure out what it is and treat it properly. I'm so, I mean, great message to put out to people, Matt, if people are getting sick after they've been in hospital.

But also I'm so glad to hear that Ellie's doing better and let's hope that she's on the up now. I want to get her in for Fun Fact Friday. Let's get her in. When she is better and she's back to full health. She's on fun back. We will get her on the show. Don't worry about that.

Hey, Matthew Johnson, or should I say Matthew McConaughey because you're a Hollywood superstar now. Well, it's actually Constable Samson was my character's name. That's right, Brittany. Thank you very much. I was in a movie last. Don't laugh. No, hang on.

You're not in a movie yet. You filmed a movie. So I was in the movie. I don't know if it's a telemovie. I'm not sure. Anyway, look, I made a couple of little mistakes, okay? Hang on, set this up first. For those that are listening that have no idea what you're talking about,

what is the movie, when did you do it, what do we know? Okay, so the movie is called The Killings. It's going to be on Stan. It's not until next year. I think not until May, so a little while away. Yeah, okay. Okay, I somehow got in contact with the director. Somehow I was in the bushes outside of his house.

And I was like, hey, relax. I'm in your bedroom. It's fine. I'm under the bed. I said, if there is any opportunity to be in the movie, I would love to audition. And he goes, actually, I've got a role that I think you'd be great for. And I was like, dude, I am in.

I need to start doing this. You need to start breaking into directors' homes and getting in movies. But I got the role. It was small, okay? And I don't know how I did this, but I knew it was called The Killings. I thought it was a comedy. Okay, so I was getting my makeup done, I was getting dressed and they were like, are you excited?

And I said, yeah, you know, it's great. It's good to be involved in something that's just a lot of fun. The Killings doesn't scream comedy. I know. I just, I thought it was like, you know. Honey. Yeah, exactly. And they were like, oh, involved in like a fun project.

And I was like, yeah, just like a really silly, you know, I'm here for a laugh. And they were like, oh, okay. And I was like, well, how has it been? Has it not been fun? And they were like, well, there's just been a lot of death. And I was like, okay. You're like as in like scary movie death?

It was like horrific. And I was like, oh, it's a horror film. And I was like, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just, you know. I'm getting all my movies mixed up. You have fun regardless what the genre is, right? And then you know how I was growing the moustache?

Yeah, for the police role. Because I was playing a constable and I thought it was set in the 1980s. It's not. It's not. It's present day. So you just look like a weirdo. And they were like, oh, I guess the mustache kind of does work. And I was like, of course it does.

It's 1980s. And they were like, what? How did you get this so mixed up? I feel like you had a golden opportunity and you didn't do with it what you should. But then to top it all off, and you've been in like little films. I'm also a very famous actress, yeah. So you know when you're on set, before they start filming, you have what's called blocking where you just walk through the scene.

Everyone does their lines. and in my head I was thinking, I don't know any of this dialogue. I learnt the wrong page. Didn't you only have one line? I had one line. So I was panicking but I managed to get through. The line. Like I grabbed someone's script and I was like,

can you just, where are we? And I was like, okay, cool. But there was an actor called Heather Mitchell who's like, she's so well-known. She's almost 70. She's been in so many productions. She's like, you know, she's a goddess of Australian scream. And I'm there.

I can't stuff up my one line and just as it came to me, I found my place on the page. I got my line out and I was like, cool, I can remember this. But my line is, she wants to see you. Hang on. You told us the line the other day was. It was wrong. Oh, my God.

I actually can't deal with you. So hang on. Can you say your line in character? Okay, in character. This is the actual line. I'm not joking around. What's the woman's line before you? I'll do it.

I think she said, you have to say, they're here. Okay. They're here. Sorry, Inspector. This woman insisted on speaking with you. What? But can you do it more in character? Oh, is that how you do it?

Okay, go again, go again, go again. Okay. They're here to see you. Sorry, Inspector. This woman insisted on speaking. They didn't ask you back, did they? It comes out May, guys. It's going to be great.

oh i can't wait to see it maybe not the next matthew mahoney but you're matthew johnson hey all right thank you thank you for taking the attention off me brit appreciate it hey maddie j i have something that you might want to get amongst i know you're always trying to find like new hobbies and activities and you you bought a mountain bike and you started not a mountain bike sorry a road bike and started like bike riding and don't wait hang on a second don't try and caveat your strange story that you've got with the fact that I'm trying to find a new hobby. I'm happy. There is nothing wrong with my life. I'm fulfilled. All the hobbies that I currently have are great, but what have you got for me? Okay. I don't know if you're a betting man.

I do like a bet. Yeah. I bet on the horses. Yeah. I've gotten sucked into something. It's been my Roman empire the last, actually, I was going to say a couple of days. That's a lie. When you say sucked in, pardon the pun. Yeah. Cause you know what I'm about to say. It's called Spermula 1. It is Spermula 1. That's very clever. Thank you. It's sperm racing.

Now, this is exactly what it sounds like. It is the racing of sperm. Now, I'm going to try. How? Wait, hang on a second. What are you watching? Is this on social media? Is this how you found it?

I think because of our jobs, we constantly look up weird and unusual things to talk about. So now I just get fed stuff. Anyway, I'm just fascinated by it. That's a good cover story. So it's apparently started over in like the US. These tech bros got together. They wanted to raise awareness.

It's not actually just like sports bet. They wanted to raise awareness for men's health. Was it finance bros? Finance bros. I bet it was like the finance bros being like, oh, bro, I'm faster than you are. I think it's finance bros versus tech bros probably. But what people are doing, they make it this,

you can watch it live, they make it this really big spectacle. Think of like the WWE wrestling. You know how they come out and they're like leotards and they're weighing in on each other and they're like, They're bad-mouthing each other. They make it a whole spectacle. And what they've done is they've created. So you wait.

Hang on a second. You get to see the individual before you see their seed. Yeah, 100%. I like that. That's nice. That's tasteful. Yeah, and the idea about it is like they're going each other like, you know, why they're going to take each other down.

But it's about. All this trash talk. Yeah, but it's about health. So it's like I haven't drunk in four years. Like, you know what I mean? It's about why your body is healthy and why you think your sperm is going to be the superior sperm. I can't tell if this is –

It's so funny. No, I think it's brilliant and they've created – so the whole race is watched under like a microscope, which is live stream. So you are actually seeing real live sperm and the racetrack, like the Spermula 1 racetrack is a tiny, tiny little track that is a replica supposedly of like a women's – Like Monaco.

Yeah. Monaco GP. It is. Oh, I like that. You know about the men, you get to bet on who you think. So they've told you what their like health history is. You get to say, hey, this person's been working out every day, they look after themselves, they don't drink,

and then you can put your bets on. Does the winner get someone pregnant or how does it work? No, there's not a woman laying at the end. It doesn't work like that. They're just racing towards the finish line. The sperm, how do they know which way to go? Or is it like the cane toad race where they kind of all get dropped in a bucket and they all try and hop away?

Well, I guess that's the idea, right? It's a tiny little microscopic track and I guess if your sperm sperm doesn't know where it's going, then it loses. Like if your sperm is not strong enough and intelligent enough and it's doing circles. Honestly, I'm a little bit concerned about you and your hobbies and the fact that you've tried to put this on me as something that I would like.

Do we need to talk off air? Are you okay? How much money have you lost on sperm racing so far, be honest? No, only like $1.50. Yeah, my sperm got stuck around a bend. Can I tell you what I used to race when I was a kid? Oh, God. Okay, what is it?

So my grandma was a pigeon racer. She used to race pigeons. So we've had some animal racing in our family for quite a while. So I used to race, strap in, hermit crabs. Okay. All right. Yeah, for fun. Your family will be so proud.

Of how far I've come. A family which is rich in the pedigree of racing has now gone from hermit crabs to sperm. Brittany Hockley, go on places. All right. Your poor grandma. Brittany I've got some information about modern day dating oh where did that come from you've been locked down for many years look I just wanted to know how the kids are currently dating I'm

talking about Gen Z and they're doing things a little bit differently to how we used to date okay well we dated on a dating reality TV show probably I think a lot of people dated differently to how we dated but when I was growing up when I was a youngster and I would try and find someone who was compatible with myself, what I would do, Brittany, is I would try and find that common ground. What are those same interests? Yeah, do you also like to go to the park after school? Do you like to surf?

The park after school? Interesting interest that you just suggested. Sorry, how old am I? Yeah, are we talking about when you were seven or 17? Sorry, is it more like do you like Mrs. Doubtfire? Like do we like the same movies? Yeah, do you like sunsets? At the park?

Yeah, at the park. The park is getting a hot run. But what the kids these days are doing, it is called grim keeping. Is that supposed to feel like grim reaping? Well, I guess so. I think so. Maybe like a play on words. But what it highlights is the importance of mutual disinterests.

That's how they are finding the common ground. Like a shared hatred or a shared dislike? Yeah, both could work. So I want to know right now if we could grim keep together. I have a couple of things that I dislike more than anything else and I want to try and see if we're compatible. You and me? Okay.

I've got one. When it comes to films, there is only one type of film that I dislike watching. I will avoid it at all costs. Do you want to know what it is? Is this a category or an actual film? It's a category. It's a category.

Horror. Oh, I was going to say horror. Musicals. Oh, Producer Grace has just cancelled you. It's her favourite thing to do in her spare time. Sorry, Producer Grace. Mine is horror. I can't watch a horror.

Okay, well, not quite. Producer Grace, we're out. We're out. So sorry. Unless, unless, okay, hear me out. Types of food. Fruit. What do I hate?

Pawpaw. I'll hate that with you. Yes. I like pawpaw. I've got producer Grace. Grace, you don't have any friends in the room now because we can't bond with you. I've got a food. Dolmades.

What are they? Vine leaves. Oh, I detest them. And there's nothing I detest more in the world than a vine leaf. No time for it. Producer Grace? I like them. Oh, my gosh.

I will never be able to groom keep with you and it disappoints me. You know, I sort of get it. Like psychologically, there is nothing that bonds you more. It's been proven that people bond more over a shared dislike of a person or a thing than they do when they bond over something that's a shared mutual interest. Like that has been like a proven study. It galvanizes the relationship.

Do you like that word? Grace, right? that down yeah it galvanizes the relationship it's it's it's a really surefire way to bond initially but it doesn't bode well for long term so it's like it's really good for this short sort of like relationships and whether that's love or friendship but it's not going to get you can't just hate on stuff for the rest of your life interesting point producer grace just know that a relationship short term won't be great but long term we're on to a real winner yeah i agree manny j tell us what's on your mind today look this is news that will either make you a little

bit panicked or it'll be the best thing you have ever heard in your entire life it's a broad spectrum of where it could land yeah that would that was very big the very vast okay have you heard of neo 1x he sounds like a rapper i think neo 1x oh it is 1x okay i did think it was going to be a cousin of his new album comes out next week 2x and no it's it's a robot yeah okay this just blew up on social media everyone is very excited but neo 1x is a humanoid robot that'll try and do the housework for you and it comes out next year available to the everyday person like when you say just does housework for you i feel like this is the one percent before i get into the finer details and start listing out the prices this is what one of the creators has said

your neo comes with redwood ai enabling you to do basic household tasks autonomously where other ai assistants are confined to your phone or computer neo lives with you in your physical space and has the ability to see hear and remember things about your surrounding environment to provide you with uniquely helpful assistance i can't seem to find my glasses is this paprika no that's cayenne pepper you idiot come on that is weird i don't like it what's the one with will smith the movie i robot i robot it does feel a little bit like i robot you know why it's creepy matt it's creepy because it's like looks like a human it's the same size as a human i can't tell if it's real

or if it's fake. I've been watching the movies on their Instagram and it does just look like an intern. The legs look like someone in a costume. On their tippy toes, right? But it's not cheap. Okay, it's going to cost you up to $20,000 for a Neo One X. Maybe this is a good thing.

It's only going to be available in America from next year, 2026. So if things do go bad, hey, as long as it's confined to- See you, America. I reckon we should put one in Donald Trump's office. Anyway, that's another thing. My worry is this scares me. If somebody said you could pay $20,000 as a one-off fee and have someone do all of your cleaning, all of your housework,

it can lift over 68 kilograms. That is so much. You can have it doing like full outdoor work and maintenance. If I could pay one-off fee of 20 grand and know that this would be around for years to do all my housework, I would do it. But I don't believe that this stuff isn't going to be corrupted. Now, maybe this is a conspiracy theory. Here we go.

Because there's all this stuff about AI and robots taking over the world, right? What happens when this gets a bug or someone overrides it all, like there's an attack, and this person turns on you and you wake up at night and this robot is standing over your bed with its hands and wants to strangle you or something? That's where I would go. I know, but also at the same time, it does the dishes and folds the washing. Yeah, but risk of death in your bed?

So, like, you know, with three kids right now and the house is pretty trashed, is it a risk worth taking? I reckon it is. You're into it, aren't you? You're into this whole AI robot taking over the world thing. No, but, you know, I hear you. I am concerned. Is this the beginning of the end of the human race?

Yes. Most definitely. But does it mean that I don't have to do the dishes anymore? Yes, at the same time. Sign me up. So I'm in. Sign me up. I'm in, guys.

Let's do it. Hey, Matt, I have just seen there's a new sport taking off. It's over in the States. But I did have a look and there's some stuff going down here in Oz. In the States, they are upping the ante for 10-pin bowling. What, like more pins or how they're doing it? I guess you could call them pins. They're doing it nude.

What? Yes, they're doing nude 10-pin bowling. Now, correct me if I'm wrong. Yep. But does it classify as nude if you still need to wear those bowling shoes? Because you can't bowl. There's like rules to bowling, right? And one of them is you have to have the special shoes.

I actually think though, I think your feet, the skin would be sticky enough on that floor. But what I'm really worried about, I don't know if it's the same with women and your bits, but I would be all over the place. I need to be contained. I want the safety, the security of butt huggers, undies. I think the only reason it would work for the 10-pin bowling is it's not an extreme sport, right? They don't have pace.

They're not running. I don't think it's because- Let's not offend the bowling community, Brittany. But this is where I think it's funny and I have a photo here for you. You cannot see anything. I had a little look and in Australia, this has gone under the radar. Yeah. They have like a nude Olympics.

They actually called it the nude Olympics for many years until the real Olympics came and said we don't want an association with that. You need to change the name. So it's now called the nude games. But it's all the Olympic sports that they do nude. Have a look at this. This is a sprinter. Look at the power.

Oh, it's very, and people in the audience are loving it. But that's where I think it's like surely you're not wanting to do 100, 200, 400, 800 metre races with your member flapping around. It looks like an absolute spectacle. Look at the audience. That's a good atmosphere. I would definitely attend that. If you could pick one sport that you had to do, nude, what would it be?

look i have i've danced on stage i did a show called the full monty that's right can we bring that footage up and actually do you know what i have to say when you're in a position where the adrenaline is pumping your manhood it's like the body knows that it's it's non-essential it's a non-essential part so i think it conserves the blood to the main areas like your limbs when you're about to exert a lot of energy. Is that what you're saying? I've never been smaller in my life than when I was about to go on stage and dance and take my clothes off. For those who've just joined, it's for a TV show, but it was like, it was, it was kind of inverted, if you know what I'm saying. So do you, on that show, do you hide it or are you actually dancing and it's just free

and out there? No, I was looking at my mum in the front row. So your mum came to see you? Yeah, She was cheering it on. How long is it there for? Which? The member. Like, because I know you dance a little bit, then reveal it. It's short. It's short.

But I've always. No, what's short? Not the time frame? We're talking 30 seconds. I wish I was longer. But about 30 seconds, it's not that long. But I've always wanted to have the self-confidence to just go to a nudist beach and just not care. You know who does that?

Producer Grace. She loves a nudie beach. I do love a nudist beach. And what do you like about it, Grace? It's just freeing. Yeah. It's just something about it. Everyone's there.

It's a real community. People actually make way more conversation at a nudist beach than a regular beach, which I'd love less of. Do you see people then outside of the nudist beach or do you normally just reserve the meetups in location? I don't, yeah, I don't know that I've seen anybody outside of the nudist beach that I had seen on the nudist beach. Have you been to the nudist games?

No. Maybe that's for you. You're a dancer. Yeah, I'm not very athletic though. Gymnast nude dancing. No? There's a lot of poles. There's a lot of poles.

But do you know what I like? I like the fact that we're open to suggesting it as an idea, like a weekend activity. Oh, for the team? Oh, the nude. Boy, I just think we could broadcast from a nude beach. I don't know if you and I would want to be there broadcasting nude. Did you not hear how free it was?

Do you want to look at me nude and talk? I want to be as free as what Grace was talking about. I want that feeling. That's what I want to achieve. I'd do it if I could put little shells over the places. So I was like a mermaid. You can't do that. Yeah, there you go.

Oh, there's rules for this. Now, Matt, a lot of people in the next generation apparently have lost one very crucial life skill. What's that? The art of flirting. Oh, do you think? Well, apparently. There's a few articles floating around, so I'm going to say yes.

I think people aren't really flirting in public as much anymore. I think, I don't know the exact stats, but I think a lot of people just are doing it online. But this is the problem, right? We went into, I guess from COVID as well, A, we're an online society now. Like we all live on our phones. It's easier to be on an online dating app or Instagram.

It's easier. You feel more confident to be flirting through a keyboard. Then COVID hit and we weren't going out anymore. And I think a lot of people, a lot of the younger generation as well, they don't feel as comfortable with their in-person social skills. Where are all the players? What are they doing? Where are the players at?

They're actually at home playing video games. Gosh. But there are some articles and I've put together the top ways on how to flirt. I would love to know, though, your opinion because you were the bachelor. I used to be quite a good flirter back in the day, guys. Well, you had to flirt with 30 women simultaneously. So before I tell you the actual list, I would love to know, like, what were your flirting tricks?

Well, back in the day, the bachelor, I didn't have to do much. Oh. Oh, they came to me like a moth to a flame. I was just fielding the requests. You know, I think it's a lot harder when you have to proactively go out and initiate the flirting. So you didn't, you never initiated anything on The Bachelor? No.

Okay. So what about before you were The Bachelor, the season before you were on The Bachelorette? My flirting, I think was probably at its best when I was about like, I'd say my early twenties in Sydney as a youngster running around. What were you doing? Look, there's actually a point here and it's point number four on the list. It says address the flirtation. I wasn't a big fan of pick up lines, but what I would do, and if there's any men or women unsure on how to flirt, please write this down. Okay. Straight from the horse's mouth. What I would do at a bar. all right listen to this I would go up to someone ordering a drink and I would stand next to them

and I would say we've got to stop doing this and they'd say what do you mean I go this is just this is a bit much isn't it and they'd be a bit confused the flirting here going on right now then you would hope that they would just be into it because then what if they're like yeah you've really read it wrong we're not flirting and then and then I'm like cool I'll walk away or if they have a chuckle I go oh I've got a butt oh got a nibble boys we've got a live one yeah okay that's interesting so that's the only pickup line I would ever recommend using okay well I shouldn't be giving away this for free guys yes you're absolutely sure you're married married by you number two on this list is something that I would do so if I was at a bar I think this

is the tell so it's looking to their eyes now I don't mean like you don't go up to them and have a stare off like who blinks first would you do that you know when you walk past someone and you kind of do that like they're like hi and you're like smiling yeah no you do this i don't know if you can see with my botox but little eyebrow raise oh my god that's aggressive that's a lot that's because of the botox what i what i used to do is and i think if someone was doing it to me it's a really surefire way for them to know you're interested you're across the bar you just need to give them a couple of extra looks like you look over your shoulder you make it obvious that it's not a gland you look over your shoulder a little smirk look away a couple minutes later look

Back, boom. If you've looked two to three times, you're in. Okay, so I'm at the bar. I just want you to turn around. I feel awkward flirting with you, but I'm going to do it. I'll have one vodka lime soda, please. And wow. That was pretty good, wasn't it?

Wow, that was. I felt that. Yeah, that was good. That was, we need to like, we'll put this on socials. I would have done a better one. If you're not sure on how to flirt, the line of, are you flirting with me? and then the look away smile.

Well, the other ones are be sassy, use touch to your advantage. I just want to say with the touch, definitely consenting. But they say touch is flirty. Nothing out of the blue or intense, just a hand on their arm laughing about something funny. I'm not sure about number five, though. It says flirt with yourself first. It's a good way to practice.

Look in the mirror and say something flirty to yourself or give yourself a wink. You for sure would have done that before you went out, Matt, giving yourself a pep talk. I've done it once or twice. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.