Life Uncut - The Best Of The Pick Up - Can I ask my husband to shave his face?... Matt, shave your face.

Episode Date: March 8, 2025

It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP. What's on the show: Stung by a blue bottle  Saving testosterone Shave your face The woman advocating for b...aby free weddings Influencer laws un California and the great exodus of influencers Tattoo regrets Red flags when it comes to their phone You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktokSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode is recorded on Gadigal land of the Aurora Nation. Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Brittany. And this is The Pick Up, our radio show where we package up all the best bits from what we said on radio this week and we bring it here so that you don't have to listen to radio because not everyone does. We unpacked a bit of maths this week, didn't we? We did it across both though. We were like radio maths. We were podcast maths. We were everywhere maths. I want to say maths is the gift that keeps on giving, but it's not a gift. No, it's the hell hole that keeps on hell holing. Yeah. It's the holing. I mean, we talked about testosterone. So there was a guy on maths who said to his wife
Starting point is 00:00:39 that he wouldn't have sex with her on the days that he had to go to the gym or before going to the gym because he didn't want to give her the testosterone. He wanted to give it to the chin up bars. He didn't want to waste it on her. He didn't want to waste his testosterone. he didn't want to waste his testosterone on love making he wanted it for the bicep bars and i think you know what you're not an olympian you're not a professional athlete you're just a gym bro i don't think it matters that much if you bang and then go and do a workout i would agree and i think that that is exactly where we got to in that discussion but also i cannot wrap my head around the fact of how jealous I would be of the gym.
Starting point is 00:01:18 If my boyfriend was like, sorry, I must save this for the gym, I'd be like, who's gym? What are you doing there? What do you need it for at the gym, pal? Because I'm slightly insane, but that's okay. You guys already know that. Also this week, last weekend, Matt got stung by a blue bottle at the beach.
Starting point is 00:01:34 Actually, he got stung by multiple blue bottles. He got really taken down by them. He got savaged. He did. He got savaged around the neck, around the back, around the ankle. Back and crack. It was neck, back and crack. But I discovered that there is a very Australian way
Starting point is 00:01:48 of treating blue bottle stings that I was completely unaware about. Which is crazy because everyone listening right now has heard it. So the question on everyone's lips is did I or didn't I piss on my husband? Find out. You'll have to wait to find out. All right, let's get into it. Last week we spoke about a woman in the States who was going viral because she had decided to have no children at her wedding.
Starting point is 00:02:10 Then someone had rocked up at her wedding and the poor thing, Claire, had to suffer through a screaming baby through her vows. Have a listen to this. She's standing up there at the front doing her vows and all of a sudden she hears this.
Starting point is 00:02:24 But I'm the only one that knows them. And one of the questions I asked was when did you know you were in love and wanted to spend the rest of your life together as husband and wife? Claire has come out and said
Starting point is 00:02:38 she is now an advocate for completely child-free weddings because of this experience. And I think go off, Claire, really lend your time to stuff that matters in the world. How are you an advocate for that? Do you go around to weddings and see if there's kids there and take them out? Like, what are you doing? Well, we can ask that question.
Starting point is 00:02:54 Claire, what are you doing? Because we have Claire on the line all the way from the States. We have so many questions for you about how this unfolded. But Claire, welcome to the show. Thanks, guys, for having me. I know there are so many questions and I'm ready to answer. So thanks, guys, for having me. Well, I'm sure you didn't expect it to go so viral.
Starting point is 00:03:13 It's had more than 3 million views. So I'm assuming the person in question has seen this. Are you still friends with the owner of the small screaming child? The parent. I don't know. I don't know if this person has seen it. I have not talked to them. They have not given an apology.
Starting point is 00:03:30 But honestly, I probably owe an apology for blasting them on the internet. But no, I haven't heard from them. And at this point, I hope that they haven't seen it. We saw it here in Australia. So I'm pretty sure your friend that was at the wedding has seen it. Maybe they've just gone cold because they're so embarrassed. I don't know. They went cold after the wedding too.
Starting point is 00:03:51 So wait, what happened? So when you, did you say anything during your like vows? Did you interrupt? Did you, so there was nothing that was mentioned during the wedding? No, my eyes said it all. That's why I gave this advice. Okay, if you don't know what Claire's talking about, in the clip, I've never seen quite such a profound stink eye
Starting point is 00:04:10 that's come from a bride in mid vows. But obviously it's very distracting. Anyone who's listened to that would feel horrified if they had to listen through a baby screaming through their vows. And this comes from someone who has kids. I've been to loads of weddings that have children and loads of weddings that don't have kids.
Starting point is 00:04:24 But I think the respectable thing is, is that if your kid starts crying, you pick them up and you walk out so that the wedding can carry on uninterrupted. So did this person who was at your wedding just stay through the whole thing? They didn't even attempt to remove the child? Well, here's a little bit more to the story that I will tell you.
Starting point is 00:04:43 Right before the wedding started, I guess the baby was being fussy. So this person walked out with the baby before the processional. Well, they made their way back into the ceremony area when the wedding coordinator said, no, you cannot enter. Because I know a lot of people on TikTok were asking, why didn't the wedding coordinator do something? And my wedding coordinator was a 10 out of 10. So no hate to her and no hate to the officiant. They were awesome. And so this person, they just wanted to come see the ceremony.
Starting point is 00:05:15 Claire, was this your side of the family or your partner's side of the family? I cannot tell you. So how are you? I mean, we have heard now that you are an advocate for child-free weddings. So what are you doing here? Are you picketing? Are there, is there a minibus where you're kidnapping the small children at weddings? What are you doing to stop this travesty?
Starting point is 00:05:36 Yeah, I mean, some people advocate for, like, women's rights, coral reefs. I advocate for them. And, you know, so I started, like, a non-for-profit where I raise money for fueling my bus that goes around town, and when I hear children crying at weddings, I whisk them away. You go take them. I'm pretty sure it's illegal in multiple countries.
Starting point is 00:06:00 Claire, you are hilarious. Honestly, I think anybody, no matter whether you've got kids yourself or whether you had a kid-free wedding, I don't think that there's a single person who would listen to that audio and think, oh, that's exactly what I want to interrupt my vows. Well, Claire, I am getting married in a couple of months. I might have to fly you over and put you at the door. Stop kids getting into my wedding.
Starting point is 00:06:20 I won't let anyone pass. Don't worry. If you station me there, not even that kind of guest will get past me. How did you actually see, because I know we spoke about it here on The Pickup, We put it on our socials. Did we tag you, Claire? Because I was like, did we tag you or did you just stumble across it? No, you straight up added me.
Starting point is 00:06:42 Also, Britt, you even said it on the radio break. You were like, tag Claire. I need to know how is she advocating. This was all you. Okay, well, you're welcome. Claire, thank you so much for coming and being part of the show. Thanks, guys. Appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:06:56 Well, Mavs is just a show that keeps on giving. We were once upon a time called The Pick Up and now we're just The Maths Recap Show. Welcome everyone. Maths Up. This week is couples retreat week on Maths where they go away and the girls get to go hang out with the girls, the guys get to hang out with the guys
Starting point is 00:07:09 and they all mix together and it's supposed to be all wonderful and wholesome. Yeah, it's like the retreat from hell. So there's one couple, Jackie and Ryan, and Jackie has made quite an interesting revelation about their sex life. Have a listen. He only wants to have sex if he's not training.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Like, as in he'll only have sex after training and never in the morning. It has to be at night after training because he wants to, like, save his test, he says. Wait, what? Wait, what? Apparently testosterone helps you work out. Is this real?
Starting point is 00:07:40 I've never heard that and can no-one tell my husband because I don't need him savouring his testosterone for the gym. It's pretty funny. I think it's a bit of a stretch for him. Like, he's just a gym bro. I don't want to, like, talk him down, but you're not going to the Olympics, you're not a professional athlete you're literally just going to do some bicep curls I think it's a
Starting point is 00:08:01 pretty big call to be like I can't possibly have sex it's yes it's outrageous I would be offended if my partner was like sorry I cannot be intimate with you because I have to go to the gym later I would be like wow your priorities are not quite aligned with mine however I do think it's a bit cheeky of her to sit amongst all the girls knowing it's filmed and mock him for that like that is pretty bad behavior as well. I would normally agree, except he did something similar earlier on and he was talking about their sex life to the boys. So I'm not a tit for tat. I'm not a tit for tat, but I can't go after one if I don't go after the other. So they're as bad as each other. But I think the interesting thing here is, and maybe someone needs to call Ryan and let him
Starting point is 00:08:41 know, but he's saying that he doesn't want to do the deed because he needs to save his testosterone for the gym, but that's not even medically or factually correct. Doing the deed increases your testosterone. Thank you, medical Brittany Hockley. That is exactly the information we all need. Well, it's actually the opposite. There's been tests for women and men and both people's testosterone increases after doing the deed. Although there are so many professional athletes who've said that they won't, you know, finish the deed because they have to, or they won't even do it because they have to try and save all their strength for whatever competition they've got? Well, funnily enough, I'm marrying a professional athlete.
Starting point is 00:09:21 So I did do my own due diligence and I spoke to Ben about it. And I asked Ben to speak to his, the literal sporting performance coach. So this is at a professional football team in Italy. His sole job is performance. And he said, it's actually incorrect that you can't do the deed beforehand. All it comes down to is energy conservation. So most athletes, for example, well, I'll use Ben's sporting team. Even if they're playing a home match, so if they're playing 10 minutes from their home, the night before the entire team has to go and stay at a hotel together. And the purpose of that is to remove any distractions so that you're not doing a deed. It's to remove girlfriends and wives. It is. Yep. So that they know what time you're
Starting point is 00:10:02 going to bed. They know what food you're eating. Like they know everything that you're doing in 24 hours before the match. But in terms of the horizontal dance of love, it's not about finishing. It's about conserving your energy because they're like, if you're going to go and have a marathon session with your partner, you're not going to have the energy for the next day. I mean, look, I can understand it if a professional athlete is putting it into practice because they've done all of the training and all of the like everything that they do their entire life is built around this competition. I don't understand it if you're going to the gym on a Monday, Wednesday and a Thursday to do some pull ups. I don't get it. I'm asking some serious
Starting point is 00:10:40 question. I would be deeply offended if my husband was like, sorry babe, I'm going to the gym. So like up until 3pm is completely like off the table for us to be intimate together. There's actually one of the most famous football strikers in the world, Ronaldo. He's like one of the best. He said that he
Starting point is 00:10:56 sex before a game makes him score. So he says if he scores, he'll score. So maybe Ryan needs to take a leaf out of that book. Ryan's got no idea. And I don't know, there's so many other conversations this opens up. Should they be going and laughing about their sex life with their friends? No, Ryan did turn around and he said that if Jackie reveals anything else about their sex life ever again, he's going to end the relationship.
Starting point is 00:11:15 God, well, hold your breath, everyone. They're so dramatic, aren't they? Britt, on the weekend, something happened to my husband, Matt, which resulted in many people that we were with telling me that I should pee on my husband. Well, he got stung by a blue bottle. Yeah. Is that it?
Starting point is 00:11:32 That's it, yes. How did you know? Well, because that's the number one treatment for a blue bottle sting is wee. Peeing on someone cannot be the number one treatment. Okay, so we were at the beach. We'd been there all morning and had no idea. We were swimming with the girls, having a great time. And then something must have changed in the current.
Starting point is 00:11:49 And there was an entire swarm that got washed in. There was like hundreds of them, hundreds. And at that moment, Matt had gone for a swim, but he was really far out and he'd gotten stuck. Couldn't get in in time. He was out his little goggles on. He was swimming around the rocks. But he honestly, he was so far on one side
Starting point is 00:12:05 that it was not possible for him to come back in without getting stung because there was just so many of them. And he came in and I could see that he'd been getting absolutely blasted by them on the way in. He got one wrapped around his neck. Oh, no. He had one over his shoulder. He had one down his back.
Starting point is 00:12:20 Like, they got him good, really good. Like, that's like a horror movie. I walked in and he was, like, feeling very sorry for himself and shaking a little bit and we were there with some friends and one of my friends turned around and she was like, Laura, you need to pee on him. Yeah. And I had never heard this before.
Starting point is 00:12:36 How have you never heard, like growing up in Australia, the one thing you know growing up that you're taught is like you're taught how to swim, you're taught how to ride a bike and you're taught when you get stung by a boo bottle that you wee on it. It was even so weird to me that like even she was like, I mean, I'll wee on it if you need me to. Everyone was offering to, and I was like, hold on, surely he could just wee in a bottle and wee on himself if he needs to.
Starting point is 00:12:55 Like why does it have to be my wee firstly? Anyway, I was horrified. I'd never heard of this. I got home and I was talking to my mother-in-law who lives with us and I was like, oh, Matt got stung by a blue bottle. First thing she says, did you wee on him? I was like, no, this is not normal, everyone. She's like, oh, you know, when Kate was young,
Starting point is 00:13:11 I once weed in a bottle and I had to pour it on her. And I was like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. She actually did it. We need to back this up. So yeah, she apparently, you know, 25 years ago, it was thought of that this was like the one thing that you did. I think it went from wee to vinegar and water.
Starting point is 00:13:27 Like that became a popular way of treating blue bottles. I think because it's acidic. I think the legend goes that it was like something to do with that. So I thought it wasn't acidic. I thought it had to do with the warmth. Like the warm water neutralises. It's not the warmth because otherwise you'd just put a hot water bottle on it, not wee. I don't think it's got anything to do with heat.
Starting point is 00:13:45 Well, it turns out that if anyone out there is still weeing on blue bottle stings, it's absolutely a wives' tale. Please stop. I've done my research now. It's a myth. It's a myth. The best thing for blue bottles is like just normal fresh water. You should not be weeing on each other.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Don't wee on your husband. Unless you're into that. Unless that's your kink. Like it's not going to help a blue bottle sting. So funny because whilst growing up, I know that that was like what people say you do, right? I didn't actually ever know anyone to do it. But now I know your mother-in-law weed into a bottle and tip that on her kid.
Starting point is 00:14:14 That's pretty cooked when you say it out loud. It did make me think though, there are so many bad wives tales that we've been told are good solutions for things that go wrong. Another one, like if you've got a sty, they say to rub a gold ring on it, which I would just like to say if you're still rubbing a gold ring on a star very unhygienic not a good idea lots of bacteria nothing like rubbing bacteria into bacteria to really inflame that star you've got you know what i do think you can do i think it's real is the tea bag you know when you put a green tea bag on your eye what kind of tea bag no the green tea bag is sicker you're going back
Starting point is 00:14:48 to the urine fetish so when i when i think about what i was doing growing up you know what i did i used to really want to get rid of my freckles when i was a kid like i was covered in freckles You have no freckles now. Yeah, I lasered them off. Right, so it wasn't a treatment that you used. Just when I was like a young kid, I was in the sun. Obviously, you don't wear makeup as a kid. You don't cover them.
Starting point is 00:15:07 I've still got little freckles. I just cover them. But I read that you could massage lemon juice. So I used to like cut lemons and like scrub them into my skin because I read that that got rid of freckles. Absolutely can confirm it does not get rid of freckles and it's also not very good for your skin. It's so bad for your skin.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yeah. It's also like the same thing that we would do when we put in our hair. But, like, I mean, it worked. It did bleach your hair, but it also destroyed it in the making. Other things are, like, putting potato slices on your head to treat migraines. That's meant to be, like, an old wives' tale cure. I've never heard that. Sleeping with onions in your socks is supposed to cure a cold.
Starting point is 00:15:42 Also not confirmed. But I think that's true. I don't think it is. Yep, I think it's true. Producer Grace is like, it's not. No, it is, and there is a reason, and I can't remember what it is. But it's, like, a Chinese medicine thing, I think. Well, maybe you'll believe this one as well, Britt.
Starting point is 00:15:55 Putting chicken manure on your head to treat baldness. No, I'm definitely not doing that. You could try that. You've got that little patch at the back. For fertiliser. Like, apparently, people used to think it fertilised your head. That's funny. And stepping in warm cow dung to treat athlete's foot.
Starting point is 00:16:08 Terrible. Who made that up? I don't know. But it kills germs and bacteria and heals wounds. And dry cow dung is a great scrub to get rid of dead skin and improve blood circulation. Thanks for that extra bit of information there, Producer Grace. The only one I'm sticking by for that, I think the onion.
Starting point is 00:16:22 I think there's something in that. Do you want to know the explanation? Yeah. So the theory is that onions absorb bacteria and viruses, but there's no scientific proof that it actually works. Could you also Google what a group of blue bottles is called? Is it a swamp? Is it?
Starting point is 00:16:36 An amada. An amada? Oh, that's cool. Wow, so you do learn stuff here at The Pickup. Matt got stung by an amada, by a whole school of them. An amada. Matt got amadified. Britt, there is a news article that is going viral at the moment.
Starting point is 00:16:52 Well, actually, it's a surgeon who's created content, put it out on Instagram. It's currently had 4 million views and it is accruing more rapidly. The reason for this is because he has taken DIY or doing surgery on himself to all new heights. I don't think you can take doing surgery on yourself to all new heights. I think that is the height. People don't do surgery on themselves. I mean, for example, you could do a minor surgery. Like you could close your own earlobe up if you had stretched earlobes.
Starting point is 00:17:19 I didn't do that. Yes, there's a difference between stitching a cut rather than giving yourself open heart surgery, right? Like they're not all built the same. He did stitch a cut of sorts, didn't he? So this man, he is a doctor, he's a surgeon, he's from Taiwan and he streamed this online. Basically, he had three children and as a gift to his wife,
Starting point is 00:17:40 he decided it was time for him to have a vasectomy. But not only did he go and get a vasectomy, he gave himself a vasectomy on camera. normally actually insane normally a vasectomy takes uh like around half an hour to 40 minutes he came out and said it took him twice as long because it was a little bit more complicated having to do it to himself he said like there was only one point in the operation where it seemed as though he was visibly in pain he had to like put the tools down he laid back had a moment of for like processing what he was doing and then he just got straight back to work down there
Starting point is 00:18:13 Snipping, cutting, tying up stuff. That is next level, isn't it? He did say he could feel it. Even though he had a local, he's like, it still feels weird to be able to feel in your penis what you're sewing up. I actually don't understand the purpose of it. Just get put under. You've got a doctor friend.
Starting point is 00:18:30 Do you know what? He did say this one thing, which I agree with, but it was particularly funny. He said, I am really brave. And yes, you are. Yes, you are. But also, if your wife has to give birth to three children, this should become the normal.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Men should be giving themselves vasectomies. We've got to all have childbirth and kind of go through that. I didn't do this to myself. Don't try, I don't mean that. Don't try that at home, everyone. No one listening to you is going to go and try a vasectomy at home, Lauren. Just in case I could get myself in trouble with compliance on radio or something. If somebody turns around and says,
Starting point is 00:19:00 Laura Byrne said, and then they do it, I'm going to lose my job. Well, then we're going to lose our job over a lot of stuff. I remember I didn't do it to myself, but my boyfriend at the time did. I just got him he was a doctor and I got him to bring some equipment home and I sewed up my ear holes
Starting point is 00:19:15 on my bed like we just laid down at home and he sewed my ears up like a little operating we set up a little operating table in my room and he just sewed them up that's like as close as
Starting point is 00:19:23 a do-it-yourself operation at home that I've ever done I wonder like how much this kind of like breaches heaps yeah like breaches like legislation stuff around like codes
Starting point is 00:19:32 of being a doctor they did it was in another country so no one in Australia come for me that was a lie I made the whole story up well this did happen in Taiwan
Starting point is 00:19:38 so maybe they have different rules than what is in Australia but apparently they did an investigation and he didn't actually break any rules by creating this content. He had a urologist on hand in case anything went wrong. So he had someone in the room to take over. I mean, if you've got someone in the room,
Starting point is 00:19:52 just let them do it in the first place. Lay back. You don't need to be working this hard. Yeah, but now he's probably the first person to have vasectomied himself. Like there's probably a Guinness World Record in that or something. I don't know if there is.
Starting point is 00:20:02 I think, like if we have another kid, Matt will then get a vasectomy. I'm pretty like... Does Matt know that? Yeah, I'm going to give him one. Yeah, does Matt know? We're going to DIY it in our house as well. No, I think he would.
Starting point is 00:20:15 I think he would be keen to. I actually don't. I think that if we had a third child, the fear of a fourth child would probably propel him to want to do so. His podcast partner, like my husband does a podcast, Two Doting Dads, with a guy named Ash Wicks. He went and got a vasectomy like the day after he'd had his second child because he was like, oh, we're done now.
Starting point is 00:20:35 Well, that's pretty excessive. Is it? Yeah, because the day after, like, your feelings aren't probably normal. Well, I don't know if it was the day after, but it was very shortly after. Oh, here's Laura Burns spinning those lines again on radio. Britt, last week on our podcast, Life Uncut, we answered a really important question that we were very aligned on. And that question was from a listener who asked whether or not
Starting point is 00:21:00 she could tell her husband that he was going bald. She wanted to ask him whether he could go and get, like take balding medication because she was not loving the fact that he was thinning yeah and we did say that at the end of the day no you can't go and point out your partner's insecurities and ask them to change it yes that's exactly what we unanimously landed on but i have another question for you and this one is a little bit more close to home do you think it is okay to tell your partner how you want their facial hair to be if they have decided to change it dramatically i need more context okay so imagine that you're used to your partner having a relatively can we just call
Starting point is 00:21:39 a spade a spade we're talking about your husband matt yeah we're talking about that we're talking this is very when i say close to home i'm talking about inside my home so my husband matt he was recently on i'm a celebrity get me out of here on the show he refused to shave his face he grew quite the beard matt is not normally a facial hair hairy person like i like a bit of stubble I think it's manly and sexy. It's gone beyond stubble. It's a beard. It kind of still smells like the jungle.
Starting point is 00:22:05 And I have asked him a few ways nicely if he would please shave it because it's just, it goes up my nose and I find it really hard to kiss and I'm struggling with navigating around the facial hair. And I've come up against a little bit of resistance, but maybe it's because I shouldn't be asking. No, okay, here we go. You can suggest something. You can say, hey, I love you so much better
Starting point is 00:22:27 and it's more sexier when it's, like, short or shaved or, like, not up my nose. But you can't hold the man down with a razor and try and shave his beard. If he doesn't want to, he can't. But I do think maybe if you let him down the garden path and said, maybe it turns you on more when he's clean shaven or maybe you, like, dangle that carrot. I've done it all.
Starting point is 00:22:50 He doesn't care. I was like, I will feel more excited about taking you down to pound town if you shave your face. And he goes, yeah, yeah, I'll do it tomorrow. It's been weeks. He's been home for weeks. It's getting longer by the day and he will not shave it. And it kind of smells like jungle fire.
Starting point is 00:23:05 All right, let's give the man a second to defend himself. I actually have Matt on the phone. I'm sorry, honey. I love you and I find you so sexy, but the beard's got to go. That's not what you said a minute ago. This is absolute defamation. I wash and condition this beard every other night. Why?
Starting point is 00:23:21 You try and claim to your good listeners that it smells because it absolutely doesn't. And also another thing, the one person who is your hall pass is Jason Momoa, who happens to be a very hairy man. So I'm getting really mixed signals from you. On the one hand, you want someone very hairy. All of a sudden, there's a hairy man in front of you. You don't want him anymore.
Starting point is 00:23:37 Which one is it, Laura? Jason Momoa is my hall pass, and he is a particularly hairy man. He's so hairy. I think if I was to ever climb that man, I would discover that also his facial hair goes up my nose, and I don't like it. It's a sensory thing. I actually think if Jason Momoa shaved his beard,
Starting point is 00:23:52 he wouldn't be a hall pass anymore. But what I will say is, Matt, you do you. I'm all for whatever you want to do, whatever makes you happy. But what I am going to say is, a bit in Laura's defense, when I came out of the jungle last year, I showered, shaved, moisturized, washed, conditioned. I did everything. And I thought that I was like, cool, the jungle's left behind.
Starting point is 00:24:14 So many people told me how much I still stunk. People were like, the stench is still in your hair even though you've washed it. But I couldn't smell it because I was accustomed to it. Because you've become one with the jungle. So maybe, maybe I know you're conditioning the beard, but maybe it's in there and that stench is in there and you don't know it. Don't drag me into your condition, Brittany.
Starting point is 00:24:33 I don't know how you shower, but don't you dare compare me to yourself. Also, Laura, there's a certain part of your body region that you sometimes neglect in terms of shaving. I won't go into too much detail, but all I'm saying, it's a little bit rich. Once you start shaving, I will as well. All right, let's make a deal.
Starting point is 00:24:51 If that's all it's going to take, deal. I'll do it tonight. Can you please shave your face as well? I'll report back on it tomorrow, everyone. Can someone send us some razors? We need a lot. There's a lot to get through. You guys are going to slide right off each other.
Starting point is 00:25:02 Send a hacksaw, everybody. Now, this one is a bit of an odd one for you guys, but it is something that I have been following pretty closely across social media. You might be aware that in the States, they've brought out some new legislation around family vlogging and paying your children for appearing in content. So this is specifically for like influencers
Starting point is 00:25:24 who make their money off having their kids. Like mummy influencers. Yeah, mummy influencers. Now, the thing with the US is that laws are created state by state. So laws that are being passed in, say, California are very, very different to what might be passed in, say, Tennessee. So recently, there was a law that was passed. Basically, it was a California bill
Starting point is 00:25:45 which requires content creators who feature minor children in at least 30% of their content to set aside 65% of their earnings into a trust fund, which then the child would be able to access at 18 years old. 65% is a lot. It's huge. It's a huge amount. So basically, if a child is appearing in any more than 30% of the content,
Starting point is 00:26:07 they get 65% of the earnings. The thing is, though, is that there seems to be some very famous Californian families who have made millions upon millions of dollars off the back of their families and their children who are now leaving California and moving to other states. Most of them are under the guise of like wanting to have, you know, a farm change or move somewhere with a calmer and more relaxed lifestyle.
Starting point is 00:26:32 Like a sense of community, space. But the thing is, is like a lot of it has been very oddly timed. And there is one influencer in particular who's come under fire. Her name's Brittany Xavier. She's got 5.1 million followers on TikTok. She's a really, really like well-loved sort of family vlogger who she shares her own stuff, but she really does lean into the fact that she's a mom and her kids are often in her content far more than 30%. And she moved just two weeks after these laws came
Starting point is 00:26:59 into place. So people are calling her out and saying that the move has to do with her not wanting to remunerate her kids. But she's saying, well, no, it was just bad timing. And you know, we had mold in our place in California, so we had to get out. I mean, we've spoken about this so many times, I definitely think the children should be paid. But 65% is a lot. Like if they are just in the content, but the parents are still the people that are like, I guess, doing the work, doing the editing, taking them where they need to go, making brand deals. 65% is a lot to be putting into a trust fund for the child. I don't know what I believe the laws and regulations should be, but like without doubt, 100% of these influencers, the reason they are moving is
Starting point is 00:27:38 not to grow food. The reason that they are moving is to avoid paying 65% of their earnings. And I don't know if we can say a hundred, like, you know, but it is interesting because it's come off the back. There's a really famous case in the States, Ruby Frankie. She's been convicted for 30 years for child abuse. Fantastic Disney plus documentary that's available now around it. But these changes have come about because of families who have exploited their children. So there had to be some legislation that was brought in. But I would say that the vast majority of parents who do genuinely care about their children are safeguarding their children's future. And, you know I think about it from our perspective because my husband and I we've got two kids
Starting point is 00:28:16 we often post them online not in terms of like we're very mediated with how we do it but they have appeared in our online content and they do sometimes appear in brand partnerships that we do across you know the network or the radio shows or whatever but we have separate bank accounts for them. I'm careful about saying this because I don't actually want the kids to know this because I don't want them to grow up thinking that they're growing up. Pretty sure they don't listen to the radio at preschool. No, Marley's in school. She could know this now, but like growing up on a silver spoon is like a real worry I have for them. But we put money away every year as though that they, I mean, if they've done the work, they earn the money. And when they do turn, you know, the
Starting point is 00:28:53 right age. And the thing that's really cool about that is it's not money that we've set aside for them that we're giving them. It's theirs. They earned it. It's their money. And also we're able to put it in like a really great compounding interest bank account. So they're going to have a lot more than what they would have had had they were accessing it every year. Yeah, but then we're banking on the fact that everybody that is in this position is doing what you're doing and as good a person as you're doing and saying, hey, I'm going to safeguard their future. Having said that, there'd be a lot of people that aren't doing that, but the child is still benefiting. I think there's a lot of people that would be using that income so that they live
Starting point is 00:29:25 in a nice house and their families go on nice holidays and their kids go to nice schools. So it might indirectly be going back into the children's upbringing, but there's no way to regulate that unless you literally put a law down like they have. Yeah. And I think it's a really hard thing to quantify. What is the right amount, like, you know, sharing someone's childhood online, exposing them without them being able to have consent to it and saying, well, I sent you to a nice school. Well, you lived in a nice house. Yeah. Does that equate? Is that monetary value a fair value? You know, I guess like it is tricky when the decisions is completely left up to the parents and there aren't enough regulations around it yeah I would have grown up and been like so I
Starting point is 00:30:07 think that this push in California that's happened is really exceptional and I actually hope that within Australia we have rules that come into place that make family vlogging a more responsible space so the kids aren't being exploited online we are going to be talking a tattoo regret so if you are out there listening right now and you got a tattoo that you wish you didn't get give us a call and let us know because pete davidson pete davidson had something like 200 tattoos on his body so many whole body was covered it was sort of like what he was known for but he look at him now laura he has had every single tattoo laser removed i reckon he's really hot now i don't mind a tattoo like i'm quite i quite like a tattooed man i don't want to tattoo either but like this
Starting point is 00:30:54 is 200 tattoos is a lot it is but also if you've the 200 tattoos is 200 decisions to get tattoos like that's a lot of time that you could have changed your mind along the way so in 2020 he turned around and said actually I'm gonna get them all lasered off I know you can laser tattoos off I didn't think you could laser off this many my fiance Ben is lasering a tattoo up at the moment which one not gladiator not Russell Crowe he's got Russell Crowe tattooed on his thigh which is cute this needs so much like brit's fiancee has a gladiator scene tattooed to his thigh it's the detail on russell crowe's face quite close to his nether region is an interesting choice when you first saw it what did you think the very first time you said were you like is
Starting point is 00:31:38 that russell crowe i was like hey russ i didn't see the detail of russell crowe's face and it wasn't until a couple weeks later i was like hang on a minute is that gladiator is that gladiator Yeah. No, he's just getting a little, he had a quote written on his arm. What was it? I think it was something like always believe or something motivational. But he got it so young that it all bled into one another and you couldn't really read it anymore.
Starting point is 00:32:00 So he's like, I'll just remove it. I have quite a big one down my side that I got when I was like 23. And most people cut a fringe when they've gone through a bad breakup. I, on this occasion, decided I would get a side tattoo. and it is probably, like, 25 centimetres long. Like, it's quite long and it's a hamster hand. Show Grace. So I don't want to show Grace.
Starting point is 00:32:23 I don't want to show Producer Grace. It's exactly what she described. Tell me, you tell me how, is it as long as I think it is? Oh. It's so much longer than I thought it was going to be. It's so big. And it's really quite thick. Well, it wasn't.
Starting point is 00:32:38 And, like, dark. When I got it done, it was really soft and detailed. But now from like sun exposure and age and I've had two babies, like it's just stretched. And now I just have like a weird hand melting down the side of my body. And you've also got like a club stamp tattooed on your wrist. I'm also not Hindu. So it's just not appropriate.
Starting point is 00:32:58 You also just can't be bothered to get it lasered off. So you're just committed to it. It's not that I can't be bothered. It's because of the pain. It's so dark. It's so old. And it's so big. You gave birth to two kids.
Starting point is 00:33:10 With an epidural. If you could give me all the drugs in the world, I'll go and get it lasered off. But maybe we can make content out of it. But I just don't think I could. Hey, we've got Phoenix on the line. Phoenix, have you got a tattoo that you regret? What's your situation?
Starting point is 00:33:23 Hey, so I've got a tattoo that my mum regrets me getting. A few years ago, I was travelling in Greece doing a contiki and we were on our last night at a club and there was a tattoo parlour in the club. And I was like, oh my God, I really want to get a tattoo, but I don't know what to get. And I thought, oh, what did I have for dinner? and I went in and I got fetter written on my arse.
Starting point is 00:33:42 Just the word fetter. So not a block of fetter, just the word. Just the word fetter on my arse. On your arse. That's so stupid. I'm sorry. And you don't regret that? There's two other people that have it somewhere in the world as well,
Starting point is 00:33:58 so I'm not sure how they're feeling, but kind of quirky. I do like that you just kind of were like, you know, YOLO, I want to get a tattoo today. I don't really care what it's about. A tattoo in a club in another country screams, doesn't scream, like occupational health and safety. Sometimes it's not about what you get tattooed on you. It's the story surrounding it.
Starting point is 00:34:15 Kayla's not even besties with them. She doesn't know who they are. They were just on a Contiki trip. She's like, said they live somewhere in the world. Did they also eat feta that night? That's the real question. They did. They had tzatziki, but I was like, guys, feta looks so much better than tzatziki.
Starting point is 00:34:27 And no one can spell tzatziki. No one can spell it. Thank you. I regret that one for you as well. Okay, we've got Michaela on the line. Hi, Michaela. Hello. Hi, Michaela.
Starting point is 00:34:37 What do you regret? My brother got our mum's brownie recipe tattooed on his back. Is it a particularly good brownie recipe? Yeah, I mean, it's not bad. But it's a brownie recipe. He got the whole, like, every ingredient and, like, the method. Every ingredient and the method. So it's like, whatever it is, it's like, you know,
Starting point is 00:34:54 a cup of sugar, a cup of milk, a cup of flour. How big are we talking? Mixed together. Like a shoulder blade covered. The whole shoulder blade is covered in your mum's brownie recipe. I feel like mum would either be really pissed were also incredibly flattered. It's going to go one of two ways.
Starting point is 00:35:10 No, she loved it. He's also like a bit of a golden boy in the family. So that really helped him out there with getting to the favourite list. When he's cooking, how does he follow the recipe? I don't think he would ever admit it. I think it was just a way to like approach girls when he was younger to be like, hey, I got my mum's brownie tattooed on my back. And then they'd be like, oh, really?
Starting point is 00:35:29 Show me. Oh, my God. I sort of like how you love it. I also think he got it somewhere where he doesn't have to see it and someone else can make him brownies. That's what that is. It sounds like a real technique. He hates it now.
Starting point is 00:35:40 Like, if you bring it up with him, he'll be like, oh, no, don't talk about it. He tries to be a respectful lawyer now. A respectful lawyer with a brownie recipe on his back. Oh, my God, it's so good. Oh, thank you for that. I came across this couples therapist. His name's Jonathan VanVegan.
Starting point is 00:35:58 What a name. Wow. Jonathan VanVegan, he is quite vocal around different traits that he sees in his couples who come in for therapy, hallmarks that usually indicate that the relationship is not going to work out. Now, he created a piece of content that was about the seven phone traits that you should keep an eye out for. And if your partner starts doing these things, they could be indications that maybe they're not being completely faithful. And I would love to get your opinion on these, Britt. So this is what he thinks are all red flags. Number one, their phone
Starting point is 00:36:31 is on do not disturb almost 24 7 oh yeah okay i've got it it mine's on silent 24 7 do not do not disturb it's a different kettle of fish i think yeah but you can notify anyway i just did it to you when you're on the toilet you did yeah you did i was trying to enjoy my poo and peace in that break but yeah i said to producer grace i'm just gonna message her see where she is and i said oh she's on do not disturb and i went notify anyway all right number two they flip their phone face down whenever you're in the room no not the end of the world because on its own could be seen as respectful you've got my attention i'm not gonna look at my phone but combined with do not disturb and other things maybe so i think that this one is a pretty telling sign to me anyway and that
Starting point is 00:37:15 was because when i was in a long-term relationship with a guy who was cheating on me he was so secretive about his phone he would always have it face down it didn't matter where we were or what we were doing we could be like watching a movie we could be out for dinner wherever it was i could never see the screen on his phone he was so secretive with it um number three their phone is always in their hand like it's an emotional support animal i don't think that's a red flag anymore because that's almost everyone but like they never leave it around the house it's always on their body they never leave it unattended i think that's weird number four they forget to tell you that they've changed their password sorry babe just i just changed it no not weird i don't
Starting point is 00:37:52 think you need to tell your partner that you changed password i'm not sold on this therapist Number five, they get weirdly defensive when you casually ask, oh, who's that, on the phone. Yeah, okay, that's fair. You shouldn't be defensive. Here's a questionable one. Their phone's wallpaper includes the kids, but you are nowhere in sight. Mate, this van vegan is a bit of a stretch.
Starting point is 00:38:14 Like if you've got your kids, you're allowed to have them on your phone. That's true, but like you could also have your partner on there from time to time. Maybe they're trying to pretend like they're single is what he's saying. Yeah, but also maybe they're a proud parent. but not proud husband or wife. Yeah, exactly. Okay, and number seven,
Starting point is 00:38:29 they text with their phone tilted away from you like they're hiding a nuclear launch code. So they never text so that you can see what's on screen. Or maybe they've got one of those privacy screens so that you can't see it anyway. Well, no, because then you don't need to lean away. True. The privacy screens are amazing, actually.
Starting point is 00:38:42 It's so easy to cheat these days. I'm not saying that, but like cheating 10 years ago was hard because you could get caught so easily. But now there's so many like things that help you cheat. I don't know about Van Vegan. I reckon that these things individually, they're not alarm bells. No, I agree.
Starting point is 00:39:00 If your partner's doing all of them, then, yeah, I would be like, okay, there is something very secretive on that phone. So he went on to say that privacy in a relationship means respect. However, secrecy means that you're hiding something. When I read through these. Wow, that's profound. This fan vegan should be winning awards. Secrecy means hiding something.
Starting point is 00:39:23 When I read through this, I was like individually some of these things could seem really petty and you could seem really crazy to raise them to your partner as issues that you have around their like secrecy with their phone use. But if you're in a relationship where someone's doing lots of these things and being super weird about you ever like touching their phone or being near their phone, then I think that sometimes it does pertain that not necessarily that they're cheating, but just that they might not be being completely honest with who they're speaking to on their phone. Maybe they're proposing.
Starting point is 00:39:53 Maybe they've got some stuff on your phone. That's true. That's what happened to me. I know, Laura, and you haven't learned from that. No. Well, to be fair, I've never looked at Matt's phone and suspected that he was cheating on me, so I think I have. But when Matt was planning on proposing to me, he had put photos of diamonds that he was looking at
Starting point is 00:40:09 and choosing between into a photo vault on his phone. And so this one day he was showing me something on his phone and then he flicked past a photo vault and I was like, well, that's new. Why have you got that on your phone? and I also had come from a relationship where, you know, my ex had had a photo vault on his phone and it was filled with photos of girls that he had been with, you know, while he cheated on me.
Starting point is 00:40:31 So, like, I was, a photo vault triggered me bad and Matt was like, it's nothing, I'm not showing you. Anyway, we had a bit of a fight about it. It didn't even spring to mind that it might be a proposal? Never. Not one positive thing sprung to mind. I only thought he was doing the dirty. Anyway, his sister pulled me aside and was like,
Starting point is 00:40:49 Matt is trying to do something nice for you and you are ruining it. Yeah, she's like, just pull your head in. So what we're taking from this is don't take my advice, all van vegans. Perfect.

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