Life Uncut - The best of The Pick Up radio show - 'Good Moaning'

Episode Date: June 2, 2024

It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP. ON THE SHOW Mitch shares his sister's MS battle Laura puts her foot in it We put Britt's boyfriend to the test Mitch got caught in a compromising position  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders, past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. This episode is recorded on Gadigal land of the Aurora Nation. Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Brittany.

I'm Mitch. And this is The Pickup, so if you're new to Life Uncut, this is our radio show, which we do every day of the week, and we package up all the best bits and some of the worst bits here for you guys to listen to. Yeah, it's definitely a filtered down version. We take out the stuff we don't think you might want to hear, and we put in the good stuff. But it was a great week, and I can say that because Ben's here. And he came, it was like a bring your boyfriend to work day, so I brought him in, we're attached

at the hip, and then you guys sort of sprung a little bit of a quiz on us. You guys are so disgustingly cute. We are. It's that kind of cute when you very first start dating, even though you guys have been together now for like 18 months. But Ben came into the studio. We did this quiz. You know when you're on a plane and there's turbulence

and you see that old couple holding hands, clutching at the front row? That's what they looked like during the recording of the show. But also, look how handsome he is. But I had a realisation today and I put it on my Insta. He and you look like you could be related. That is such bullshit. In the most, you're both beautiful, but you look so similar. You do, and I never noticed it until today.

So similar. We don't look anything alike. I'm signing you guys up for siblings or dating. There's literally nothing. Not our skin tone, not our height, not our eye colour, not our nose. Like, nothing. I disagree. The shape of your head, the size of your head.

His head is twice as long as mine. It's like everything, your facial features look similar, I think. And they do say that you are attracted to people who look similar to you. Like, people always say I look like Matt. They say you're attracted to people who look like your dad. That's what they say. Terry Burnham. They're bald.

but i think that's a straight thing like that's very heterosexual it's like the whole freudian thing that like women want to be with their fathers and then men want to be with their mothers and people often end up looking like they're dogs i yeah i would take that i think i look like more like my dog than ben woof that's how like i called your dog i don't know speaking of relationships i also told a story this week about how um i thought i got away with having sex at my house because i live at home and i definitely didn't i didn't realize until the next morning that i that i was sprung it's very funny loud sex at home is probably the deal breaker it's not loud we actually had the realization that like we haven't even had like

genuine full full bang like audio sex because you both live at home do you ever yeah would you ever want to go and like stay in an airbnb or something just so you can just like really get it on didn't you do that at my house that was that was our first day at your house yeah so you did bang once at my house. On your couch, yeah. Yeah, and that's the only time you've let it rip. That was loud. What was that, my house?

On your leather couch, yeah. And then your bed, you got mad. And I had to change Britt's bed sheets. Yeah, you know why? Of course you have to change someone's sheets. He says it like he's so shocked, like I made him change the sheets that he just spoofed on. I didn't spoof on your sheets, but I did use one of Ben's condoms.

Have I ever said that? That I needed one and I ran it to the bedside table and I had to move the retainer with the Dior. Yeah, that wasn't Ben's. They're about 25 years old. My gosh, Stephen might be pregnant. You're pregnant. You're probably going to be three months pregnant

I'm gay for everyone listening That is, and Stephen's a man Alright, well I also told a story this week, we had a photo shoot for Tony May and I accidentally made the model cry and it was not my intention, but I really put my foot in it and I still feel bad about it You should feel bad

I'm on your team You were in your directorial mode I've been with you when you were in your directorial Tony May mode and it's a pleasure to watch Thank you, I was just trying to be efficient, I was trying to help her be the best version of her that she could possibly be and did not achieve that. Well, wait till you hear how she doubled down.

All right, well, that's coming up in the show. I was talking about this on the show last week, but me and my entire family, the Zamchuri family, which is the little team name we came up for, took part in the MS walk, run, roll, which is, it's kind of like there's many different steps you can do. You can do a 5K, 10K, mini marathon, quarter marathon, whatever you want to call it, raising money and funds

for MS research here in Australia. my sister becky uh has ms was only diagnosed very recently within the last six months also pregnant a lot going on um i just firstly wanted to say thank you to you girls and to the pickup listeners we are smashed our goal we like tripled our goal of fundraising and raised just under ten thousand dollars for ms research amazing man congrats you guys should be so proud really honestly because what you're doing raising awareness raising money um i know we're going to speak to becky more about it but it's it's yeah you should be really proud and i'm sure becky feels a lot of love.

Yeah. Well, I wanted to get Becky on to join us because here I am telling her story about being diagnosed with MS, living with MS, walking in the run and roll with MS, but I wanted to bring her to the show. So, Becky, for the first time, pick up debut. Welcome to the show. Hi. Hi, Becky.

Hello. Hello. How are you guys? I can't believe this is your debut. I think maybe because I know you, I feel like you've come on the show. Well, literal family and, you know, metaphorical family. Yeah. Becky, you were diagnosed with MS.

What was that like for you? And I say that because I think there's a lot of people that don't know much about it. But like at the time, did you know something was quote unquote wrong? What led you to be diagnosed? Yeah, definitely. Like I had a three year battle just to get diagnosed. So by the time I got diagnosed, I think I was actually relieved that someone finally believed something was wrong.

Initially, I had it was around the COVID time. I got COVID, I got a vaccine and then just like causes some people with immune kind of responses to flare up and I started losing my vision um I was at work and saw like weird stars and I went to the neurologist I had an MRI and he was like look you just have anxiety like relax do some mindfulness come back um so then me and my husband pretty much fought for like three years because I was having like severe migraines to the point I was losing vision on the way home from work like it got really bad fatigue numbness and pins and needles down my arm um and then yeah I pushed and pushed and pushed and eventually they did a lumbar puncture which actually came back

negative which is like one of the criteria to diagnose but the main um thing in the end they found was I had a progression of one lesion over a three-year period which is very minimal I'm very lucky a brain um but they were yes a brain lesion so I only have them in my brain um but I had one more lesion in my brain my neurologist was like look I think it's still anxiety and I was like look i'm getting a second opinion um mitch actually put me onto a really great neurologist who had me in with an ms specialist the next day mitchell and his connections i went into like chris jenna knows everything well she kept saying i'm being ghastly the doctors are saying you don't have anything so i called everyone i knew and we got her in and that's when she got a diagnosis

but this is my question becky you would now have spoken to other people who have been diagnosed with ms is this something like is this experience of of being told oh you know it's not this or it could be this or kind of it being downplayed. Is that a common experience or is that just something that was unique to you? Look, I think it's hard because unfortunately it's such a weird disease. It presents in so many different ways. Like I've met a hundred people with MS and probably five people have the same symptoms. So I think it presents so differently. You can either have brain lesions, spine lesions, both. And it really, it really depends then on what your symptoms are. But I mean, I spoke to a lady this morning

just randomly and then she was telling me that like her 13 year old niece or something they were investigating her for MS and she'd been gaslit and I told her it was you know migraines as well and I was like keep pushing like go see this specialist you need to get to the bottom of it because ultimately starting any treatment early is the key to not well hopefully if the treatment works for you is to not progressing as big as you can yeah well Becky and I mean for anyone who doesn't know what MS looks like and I think that that would be a great deal of people what does that like for you if you were to say if those symptoms were to progress what does life look like without treatment well I think it's really like for me personally and I can only

speak for me like my everyday symptoms is I have really bad static vision in my eyes so when I'm in a room everything white is static and everything black is static I have problems like the lady next to me today at work is wearing a multi-colored shirt and I can't look it up because I'm like it's making me feel like i'm gonna pass out um you know like reading a book i can't read a book because i can't see the letters they all move um but for other people like i know a girl that woke up one day and couldn't move her legs so um i think the problem is that it's an invisible disease and that i can be feeling terrible but still turn up to family lunch and put a brave face on and smile you know whereas other people they can't even you know they need a wheelchair or they need a cane

to help them out. I just really want to spread awareness for it. And there are people out there that it is a bit too late and the medication doesn't work for them. So, I mean, the closer we get to researching money for a cure and there's some amazing clinical trials going on at the moment, the better for everyone. I love you, Bec.

Thanks, Becky. Bye, guys. So sweet. Mitch, you should be so proud of yourself as well for raising awareness. I know how much this has affected you and your family, but you guys are the best. my dad had this huge moment on the weekend like a really important moment in his life um that didn't quite go to plan and i put it on my instagram and instagram was up in arms they

went bonkers and i want to talk about it and get to the bottom of this issue today the injustice the injustice the travesty my dad on behalf of my nana entered a retirement village bake-off The Great Retirement Village Bake Off. So cute. It was Poziere's Retirement Lifestyle Village up in Port Macquarie. And so what they did is they held this, they had this annual bake off, but it's just for the men of the village. And my nana.

For the men of the village. Well, it's a men's bake off. And my nana doesn't have a man in her life. So my dad entered, like, on her behalf. So she couldn't enter because there was no husband. Well, they would do other women's stuff, but this is just for the men. The men to have a bake off. Cute.

Anyway, so it's really cute. So my dad took it so seriously. My dad spent three days prepping his one entry. Three days of like, because you've got to, I don't actually know the intro because I've seen the photo. I saw a photo. It was like a cake, but it kind of looked like an iced vovo. You know those iced vovo piggies?

Yes, it did. It was surprisingly, I mean, it was surprisingly good. I couldn't do it. I'm not a baker. Does he bake? I was impressed. Did he do this to help Nana or has he all your life been a baker? My dad has cooked his whole life.

Like he is the cook of the family. My mum does too, but my dad loves it. He genuinely loves it, but he's not necessarily the baker. He cooks the proper meals, but sometimes the dessert. But he took it so seriously. He committed three days nonstop. He was timing stuff and temperature. It was incredible.

And I was like, there is no way this man can't win. He didn't win. He came second. Do we think he was robbed? I think he was robbed. I think there's some under the table stuff going on at that retirement village, and I want to speak to my dad and find out what happened. Who won?

Do we know? I don't know his name. I have a photo of him. I did block out his face on Instagram for safety and protection purposes. I didn't want anyone to come for him. Can we, do we know what he made? I don't know. Tony actually joins us now.

He's on the line. He's brisked out. Hello, Tony, mate. Injustice. Justice for Tony. Made of travesty. An absolute travesty. It's so bad.

Quickly, tell us, what did you bake? Just to paint a picture of what the item was that you entered that came second. I baked an iced vovo tart. You did look very much like an iced vovo. Why did it take three days, Dad? Practice makes perfect. Look, if you were to cook it in, you know, just set aside a day, there's a lot of waiting.

You know, you've got to make a base and then you've got to put that in the fridge for two hours and you twiddle your thumbs and then, you know, you've got to then make a marshmallow, you know, bed. And then that's in. You've got to make that, let that sit for three hours in the fridge. Do you know who came first? I was like, do you know what he had made? Because I don't know how anyone could have made it.

Yes, he made a hummingbird cake. I've seen that before. And did you get to, did you like witness the cake or taste it? Or did you see any like Cerely boxes? You know, I tasted it and there were still parts of the Cerely sticker on it. Oh, no. I swear that. I swear, I swear.

You know what, Tony? I reckon because he was a part of the village, right? He lived there, I'm assuming, Tony? Not only part of the village. He was married to a lady who's widely regarded as the very best cook by miles in the village. Insider trading. It was a sit-up, no doubt.

No doubt. So, Dad, do you reckon, are you saying you reckon his wife actually, because she's known in the village as the best baker, do you reckon that the wife actually baked for him? Look, I'm not casting any dispersions, but think about the fine cotton affair. Look, I think... What's the fine...

Do we have time to go into the... I don't have time to think about it. What is it? Dad loves history. He's going to go into something else. Tell us the fine cotton affair in 30 seconds. The fine cotton affair in 30 seconds. The fine cotton was a racehorse, a champion racehorse,

and the owners put a fix in, got a dud horse, painted it the same colour as fine cotton, and bunged it in the race. Wow. And all bet against it. It is a fine cotton... What? That is a fine cotton situation.

It's a fine cotton affair. If ever I've heard it, yeah. It looked like the real one, but it wasn't. And this is the go. Yeah, this looked like the real chef, but I'm wondering. You made a very fine... You're a winner in my eyes. I never knew that retirement villages could be so controversial.

I didn't realise that there was so much going down. There's a lot of... Look, Laura, they're a hotbed of corruption. Corruption and scandal. Are we just talking about baking scandals or things that are a bit more sordid? Well, my oma, I've got a story. Okay, Producer Grace, let's take some calls on this

because clearly there is an underworld in this country that we don't know of. 13-106-5. What's your retirement scandal? Your retirement village scandal. What's going on behind closed doors that we don't know? Tony can narrate the Netflix series when we sell this to Netflix. That's really cute.

Dad, you're a winner in my eyes, and if you ever have time three days again up your sleeve to make us a nice vovo here at the pick-up, we'll take it. I'll make one for you and Ben when you come up. Oh, thanks, Dad. What a man. We're in the middle of an investigation here, ladies. It's the biggest investigation in...

It needed that. It did. Thank you. It's the great retirement bake-off of 2024. The retirement village that my nana lives at, Pozières, the retirement village in Port Macquarie, had a bake-off for charity that was mailed. Or so they say.

We don't know if it's for charity. Probably pocketed it. No, they're good. They're great. But it was mails only and my nana lives there on her own. She doesn't have a partner. So my dad entered as the male representative. He baked for three days straight.

Like, it was extraordinary what he made. And iced vovo. Yep, he made the vovo. He made the icing. He made the shell. Took him three days. Everything. He even, like, did the little, what's it called,

where you push the little cream out and little swirls and stuff? Yeah, the piping bag. Piping bag. I can't even remember the name. Even my brain was like, the whipped cream stuff. No, no, the piping bag. He piped it. He came second.

He came second. The person that beat him, however, is married to the head honcho of the retirement village. There's definitely some scandalous things going on in the retirement home. So we thought 31065, if you know of any scandals at maybe your own grandparents' retirement homes or if you've ever heard of the scandals, we wanted to know about it. Well, we've got one from within the house. The call's coming from within the pickup, girls, because my oma, I'm Dutch,

so my Dutch oma was kicked out of her retirement village for quote unquote wearing revealing clothes. She was Miss New Holland. She was the face of Berry Juice in the 30s. She's got it. She's an ex-model. She's gorgeous. So she likes to shop at Supre and wear denim. How old are you?

86. She turned 86 on Saturday, yeah. Wait, she got shamed. She got shamed. Shamed for the way she dressed. They got together, the union of the retirement village. They said, we don't think you're, you know. Suited for the retirement.

Yeah, you align with the values. She's now in another place. She's living happily in her denim jeans and she looks hot. But the conspiracy in this country. That is not okay. Usually the types of scandals, and you can't laugh, but often it happens with dementia patients. Yeah, it does.

And that's not funny. I had so many people, because I put this whole scandal on my Instagram, and I had so many people write in talking about, like, the S-E-X that goes on at retirement homes is rampant. Multiple floors, sneaking out of their rooms, like having four different girlfriends on different levels. It's next level. To be honest, though, if I make it into a retirement village,

I'm going to do the same. Does Matt know that? Well, if he's not around. If he's not around, it's like a second lease on life. You're all there. You don't have much long to go. Enjoy yourself. Laura up 50 years.

You have. If you see her in the retirement home, she's ready. Laura, hello. Another Laura on 131065. What's your, sorry, let's cue the investor to give music. What's going on at the retirement village near you? Oh, hi, guys. Oh, my gosh.

I'm fangirling so hard right now. Hi, Laura. What's your grandma or grandpa doing? Yeah, so I used to work in aged care back in the day in my early 20s 20s as an aged care nurse and I worked in the dementia unit and we had a couple that came into the retirement village together but the lady was in the dementia unit and her husband wasn't and he was quite like with it and she had quite like she was still very like able-bodied yeah but dementia how it takes over yeah it does yeah so she kind of forgot that she was married and she

fell in love with another resident. Oh, no. And we would often find them in the room together doing all the things that they would be doing at their age. Oh, no. And then your grandpa, did he? No, not her grandpa. Oh, sorry.

The grandpa. Step-grandpa. The grandpa. New grandpa. Grandpa two. Well, not exactly what we were after in the conspiracy search, but good for them. Oh, no, that's really sad.

I don't like, I don't think we can joke about the ones that have to do with dementia. No, we're not joking. It's not joking. No, no, joking's real. It's happened. Sarah on 131065, hey, what's your conspiracy theory at your aged care facility?

Hi. I'm also fangirling very hard right now. It's a bit much now, yeah. This is great for our egos, everyone. Speaking of revealing clothing, my grandma has topless parties in the garage. They're retirement bills. Mitch, your Omar would love it there.

What do you mean? Do they actually have an event like this Friday night, everyone, topless party in the garage? I think it's like a weekly occurrence, but you're not allowed in without taking your supper. That's so funny. At tea time and they've gone a bit loopy, airplane jelly. I think this is great.

Nine-year-olds freeing the nibs. About time. That's a movement I want to be a part of. Sarah, are they hooking up? Look, I don't ask that many questions. Wait, is it put on by the village? Like when you go to the entrance and there's a cork board, does it say Friday night topless dance night

or are they doing this back end? Yeah, I think it might be a little bit under the radar but I know they take turns with two trousers to get to the home. I actually love it, like living your absolutely best life. Me too. I can get around it. Totally. I mean, yeah.

I'll do that. You do the hookups at 80, I'm doing the topless parties. I think that leads to the hookups for it but you're welcome anyway. Okay, you can come to my party, Laura. Now, we've been having quite a few discussions recently about baby names. And that's just between you, myself, and Britt. You're going to think, everyone's going to think one of us is pregnant. It's not Mitch.

No, we're not pregnant. Stop me. But Britt, you, your sister's having a baby. You're becoming an auntie again. Mitch, your sister's having a baby. And that's why we've been discussing baby names. But now I think there's so much loaded into baby names because you could go traditional. You could go with something unique.

you kind of don't want to go too unique because then you know your kid's going to get teased bullied but there is a vet who is going viral on tiktok at the moment and that is because he has come up with a list of baby names that you would think on first look at these names they're not that bad but the reason why you shouldn't call your child these names is because actually there's more animals called these names than what there are humans so in all of his time working as a vet he has been compiling a list of the most common dog and cat names and here's what they are and And I feel really sorry. Oh, no, I'm worried that one of my names might be on the handle.

But some of mine are, okay? Some of mine are. And I feel really sorry for anybody who has a child named this. And if you have a pet named this, well, well done because it's nice and common. If you're already named this, it's not a problem. And these are Aussie – not Aussie. These are human names as well. So they could be hybrid, right?

Yeah. Number one, Luna. Luna. It's a real dog name. It's a cute name for a baby. Cute. Yeah, no, dog, dog. Very sweet dog name.

You hear that in the park, in the dog park a lot. All right, number two. It's very hot. Number two, Daisy. Number three. That's a cat if ever I've heard one. I know a lot of daisies that are actual humans. Number three, Mila.

Number four. I've got a Mila in my family. A dog or a human? Human girl. Okay. All right, number four, Bella. That's a big one. Dog name, dog name.

Bella, I know a lot of humans named Bella, but I know more dogs. Oh, number five. Number five was on my real name list for a long time. That's not real. I'm looking at it. That's disgusting. It's not. I wanted to call my daughter it.

You cannot name a human this, and that is Coco. Coco Hockley. I love. Coco Hockley. No, I'm not going to be Hockley. Coco Seagrist. Still awful. Coco Seagrist is hot.

Coco Seagrist sounds like she's got an OnlyFans. We need to discuss you changing your name as well. It wigs me out that you might have a different last name. That's what happens when people get married, Laura, except for you. You don't have to do it. I want to. Okay, we're not talking. This is not about the patriarchy right now.

We're talking about baby names. All right, number seven. That's for another day, Mitch. True. Number six, sorry. I know I've lost my spot. Sorry. I was really invested in this list.

Teddy, I disagree. Teddy is a good human name. Sam Frost child is Teddy. I would love to name, if I had a little boy, Teddy is a great name. Just because it sounds like a bear. Oh, so I can't have Coco, but you can have Teddy. Yeah. These names are fine.

Number seven, Charlie. Cute. Also disagree. I think Charlie's a great one. Frankie, Archie, Ruby. Archie's your nephew? We have an Archer, not an Archie. And his parents are very against ever being called Archie.

It's been drilled into us since the day he was born. He can't be an Archie. I don't know. I don't think you have to listen to this vet, but I think these names are better than names like Braxton. You know, you can meet kids' names Braxton. That's a character on Home and Away. No one's not naming their kid Braxton.

They are. I went to school with a Braxton. I went to school with a Brock, and guess what his last name was? What? Ollie. Ollie. I was going to, damn it, you're very sure. It's not.

He did, Brock Ollie. He did. Yeah, he did. He had a big afro. I'm not joking. And it was green. It was green, yeah. I'm not against Collie.

And then he died at white. You know what they called him then? Collie. What? Cauliflower. White broccoli. Then he would have been broccoli. It doesn't make sense.

I'm not against naming your, I'm not against these names. I'm all for naming your animal a very straight human name. Like if you've got a dog, name it David. I agree. Name it Frank. Yep. Scream Frank at the dog park. Linda.

Hilarious. He did say some other names. Linda. Linda did a shit on the lawn again. I'm so, hey, so sorry, neighbor, but Paul's shit on your lawn again. No, he said some other names that didn't quite make the list, but he said, I'll veto these forever. He'll never call them Milo, which I love.

Like, I love the name Milo, but he has said, you can't do it. No, Milo and Otis. Does anyone remember that movie from a million years ago? Yeah, the dog and cat, and they floated down the river. What about Tramp after Lady and the Tramp? I don't think you can call out Tramp in a dog park. I don't think you can call your child Tramp at daycare, and you also can't call your dog that.

No, Tramp for a boy and Trampadet for a girl. Trampet. Trampetti. Okay, let's hope Mitch never has kids. For the sake of the kids. Kathleen, trampoline. Laura, do you feel like there's some sort of romantic vibe? What is this?

This is, I mean, this is the guest that everyone has been waiting for. This is the celebrity guest that we have always wanted to have on the show. And it's not just a normal Wednesday. It is not a normal hump day. I have taken hump day to another level. It's bring your boyfriend to work day. My boyfriend, Ben, Ben Segrist, all the way from Scotland, has arrived in town.

And, of course, I've... Hello, guys. How are you doing? Hello, Benny. Not your first time here at the pick-up. It's the first time at the new studio. Yes, it is. It's looking great.

Yeah, last time you were here, we wrapped you in a snake, I think, and gave you a cockroach, Aussie animals. Yeah, not the best idea, babe. Ben, what is it like when you get back here? I mean, you're a superstar in your own right, so you play for the Celtics. Just Celtic. Well, okay, sorry. Celtic football.

You're a soccer player, which you'll kill me for saying that, football player. Yeah. You've arrived, and then pretty much since you've been here, I was talking to Britt on the phone yesterday, and there was a paparazzi out the front of Britt's apartment and now there is a paparazzi video of the two of you just walking the dog to go get a coffee. Yeah, I know.

Crazy world, isn't it? It's crazy world. It was so boring. They were walking. I'm like, put a hand on her ass or something. No, it's low key. Do something. So I was like, oh my God, paparazzi, just let us be.

We haven't seen each other in nearly five months. Five. Then I saw the paparazzi footage and paparazzi have gone to another level. They don't just take photos anymore. They film videos, make it into sizzle reels, It's put backing music on it and then it goes on social media. So Ben and I, I was like, Ben, it's actually really cute. Like someone's documented our first date together.

I know it came up in my For You page. I was watching recipes and I was watching interview videos and all of a sudden it's Britt and Ben. I'm like, that's my friend. It was a really weird experience. What was the first moment of reunion like? Because genuinely four months, the last time you saw Ben was, what, January over in Europe?

What happened exactly, Ben? Well, you know, Britt has this usual trait of trying to scare me. I always try and scare her. first time we see each other but she's she's she's not the best you need some work babe i set up the camera to scare him yeah it's a dark room dark like almost like a dark alleyway and it's just the camera and the lights on and i'm like well i can obviously i can obviously know what's happening he walked in and i was hiding he goes babe i can literally see the camera it's like right there and she just came screaming wait was this at the airport or was this no it was it was it was wait

but it didn't pick you up from the airport after five months of not seeing each other no no no she explained to me that's an hour's travel for her which i respect you know that kind of stuff i have to say i did treat myself to business class uh because it's such a long flight so they do offer a chauffeur service exactly why would i pick him up when he could have chauffeur driven to my house it was really late at night it's cold guys don't don't come so the first person you see when you land in australia is a man in a hat and a suit yeah not your girlfriend man in a hat and a suit and then an iphone because brit's trying to scare him and with a ring light You're like, this is the end.

You're our VIP guest. Laura, before we let you go, Ben, we're not letting you out of here. Oh, no, no, no. Because we know how much Britt's been looking forward to this. You guys don't get to see each other very often. It's been like, what, five months now since the last time? And we wanted to make it really, really special for you. So we have organised a beautiful weekend away.

Yeah, we have. Gorgeous. What? You guys would not do that. A beautiful weekend away for you guys to celebrate your love. What's the catch? You've got to work for it first. Right.

We have a little quiz coming up. And we want to know just how well you think you know each other. Oh, no. Here we go. Yeah. I did not know this was coming, Ben. Think about what you're going to get. You know, it could be a romantic weekend or you could be sleeping on a broken bed.

He gets it. He gets it even if we don't go away. We don't have to play this game to get it. No, but it's nice to earn it, you know. Yeah. And also, it's also really good for us to know how well Ben actually knows you, Brit, which is exactly what this is going to serve. Okay.

It's going to shed some light on the relationship. This is not going to end well, is it? No. Okay, I'm nervous. All right, let's quiz Ben. We got Brit to step out of the room Ben answered some questions Some of them about himself

Some of them about Brit And now the way that this is going to work Is Brit, we're going to ask you the questions And you have to answer them Knowing or trying to figure out What you think would have been Ben's answer What he would have said Because you've got to get these correct

Okay, your mind is pretty sick We're seeing how connected you are We want you to get 100% correct But if you get around 80% We'll give you the weekend away Okay Alright, this is going to go great Let's go

Laura, would you like to kick off the questions we asked Ben while Britt wasn't in the room? All right, Britt. Question number one. What is your favourite meal? Fettuccine carbonara. He would have said fettuccine carbonara. His version.

This is what Ben said. Pasta carbonara. Yeah, same thing. That's correct. Well done. We'll take it. We'll take it. Next one.

Britt, what would Ben say if we asked him who is the funniest out of the two of you? No, I reckon every part of him would want to say that he is, but I think he's going to say I am. Britt. Britt's funnier. She thinks she's funnier, but I'll give her that. Yeah, exactly.

Bang on. Exactly. I knew you were going to say that. We're off to a good start here. We are. What sport did Britt play as a teenager? Professional sport that she often talks about. She doesn't shut up about it.

Oh, please, when? I don't even know what you're talking about. All the time. I played heaps of professional sports. But what sport? The one that you set records for, that you often bring up the records. Australian champion, whatever. Yeah.

Oh, there we go. She knows. He doesn't know. I can tell. Well, what is it? What would he say? He would have no idea. Is that right?

Did you get it? This is what Ben had to say. Oh, I don't know. I think you have something to do with running. I'm not sure, though. It must be sprinting. Oh, I'm not giving you that. What is the answer?

Ben, that is really bad. What is the answer? Bodyboarding. Like surfing. That's not like surfing. It's bodyboarding. I say it because every time I say bodyboarding, people think I mean bodybuilding.

So I have to then say, like, surfing. Okay, next question. I have told you that so many times. I'm off that. You don't listen to me. Listen, it's hard to relate when you go bodyboarding in Switzerland. Nobody's ever heard of a Swiss bodybuilding. You don't have to know it.

You just have to remember it. It's European. It's hard. If it was snow skiing or alpaca eating, he'd know. If it was highland cow. I mean, more so. That was just like, you got one question wrong. Are you guys going to be okay?

Yeah, we'll be fine. All right. We'll be fine. See how she goes on. Let's see if you can redeem yourself with this. Okay, next one is, who said, I love you first? Okay. Just try and...

What would Ben say? Try and think of what I... I know what it's going to be. Me. On a technicality. It was me. It's what Ben said. She did on radio with you.

Yes, that's correct. Yeah. I was there. Yeah, but it wasn't a declaration. Sorry. It slipped out. No, I take it. We'll give it to them.

All right. Who is Brit's celebrity doppelganger? Megan Fox. Locking in Megan Fox. This is what Ben had to say. Tell you what, we talked about this with my teammates, actually. They came up with some good suggestions, which I all forgot. But I think she's got a bit of Megan Fox, but early Megan Fox.

Not the strange version of her now. So the transformer Megan Fox. I just want it on record. As flat as I am, I don't see myself as Megan Fox. I don't see the resemblance. but the fact that you and your teammates think that, I'm just going to ride that into the sunset. All right, you're doing well.

Don't question. Next one. We asked Ben, what is Brit's birthday? 21st of August. He would have got it. He loves me. You think? And if he didn't, there's such big trouble off air.

I am jet lagged. I'm awfully jet lagged. Oh, my God. You didn't get my birthday, Ben. If you didn't get my birthday. I'm just, you know. He's tired. Yeah.

Surely not. Surely. This is what Ben had to say. August 21st, I think. Yes, I knew he'd get it. He got it. He got it. All right, for the very last question, for the weekend away,

for a celebratory, beautiful weekend together on us, who is the breadwinner in your relationship? I don't think he would have answered that, would you, Ben? I don't think he would disclose our finance. Okay, I know what he would say. Knowing this is going to go on radio, and you guys will never know if it's the truth or not, I think that he would say that I was.

For the weekend away. I reckon. Because I think you'd, yeah, I think you'd say that. And I'm not going to tell you guys if it's the truth or not. We have access to your NAB bank account so we can verify. She's with Ng, I know that for sure. She's with Ng. I think it's ING.

It's ING. I think it's ING. Ng, you're a loser. You guys are so rich. She's with West Peak. She's with Westy. Anz. All right.

We asked Ben. She's with Centigio. Anz. Here we go. What Ben said. I don't know. We're both doing well, so. It's not competition, but competition's good.

Yeah, Brit. For now. It's Brit! Which actually means maybe Brit should just pay for this weekend away. Yeah, you can cover it, mate. You don't get to make me pay for my own prize. Anyway, that's not even the truth, or maybe it is. You'll never know.

You did surprisingly, exceptionally well at this. When we played this game at my hen's party, my husband Matt got most of the questions wrong. And we spent a lot of time together. We are so happy for you guys. Have a great weekend away. Oh, God, they're going to kiss. Oh, throw on the mic.

Oh, here. We love you guys. Congratulations on being so loved up. Oh, God, they're getting undressed here in the room. Okay. Oh, my God. It's massive. It's Thursday.

Let's do this. It's Thursday. This is my favorite segment, Ask Uncut, where you guys call up with the problem of the week, the conundrum, something you need a little bit of help with. Now, we don't have any education around this, but we're very enthusiastic about giving our advice. Well, we're your free therapists, but we don't have any qualifications.

We bog bill. First ten are free. We bog bill. I think they're all free because it's not great advice. No prize attached as well. It's just come on and we'll try our best. Yeah, and today's one is about man's best friend. We have Linda on the phone.

Hey, Linda, what's the conundrum? How can we help? Hi there, guys. I really need your help. I've got a domestic dilemma and it's in great danger of becoming a domestic drama. Yeah. My question for you today is, is it okay to let the dog lick the dishes clean before they get washed up?

Oh, that is so gross. Okay. How are you washing them though? Are you hand washing them or are they going into a dishwasher? Because I think dishwasher, like that's like an hour wash. You could do anything. You could go to the toilet on them and put them in the dishwasher. I don't.

But I think you could. Laura, you're disgusting. Don't take your advice from Laura. She does a dump in the dishwasher. That's what I heard. Serious question though. How is it? Are you hand washing or are you a dishwasher?

Well, it depends. I mean, some things go in the dishwasher, obviously, but some pots and pans, you know, plates go in the dishwasher. Some are hand washed. So it's a bit of both. Linda, what kind of dog is it? Well, it's a boy dog for a start. Okay.

That's fine. Well, we know what he licks. Oh. Hurry up. Dogs lick their genitals. Okay. I did not know where that was going. All right, I need to get to the bottom of this.

Linda, who in your household has a problem with it and who doesn't have a problem with it? I think it's a great environmental initiative and it saves time. Oh, you think it's okay, Linda? Yeah, yeah, I'm good with it. It's my hubby and kids. They think it's disgusting and unhygienic. Oh, Linda, we've just seen the video of your dog.

Not only is your dog licking the plates, your dog is literally inside the dishwasher licking the plates. If anyone wants a mental image, Google ant eater eating ants out of a well. How long is that tongue? Its tongue is like 10 centimetres long, looking the bollock nays off those porcelain Maxwell Brooks. That's disgusting. You can't call it.

You can't do that, Linda. You have to give the doggies own bowl. What are you doing, Linda? Linda, I know I said you could take a dump on a plate and then put it in a dishwasher, but I've changed my mind after watching this. If you're at the dinner table and you've had spag bol and there's a bit of mince on the plate,

I'm all for putting the plate down on the ground, letting the dog clean it up. But filling a dirty dishwasher and letting the dog go at it like ribs and rump style on it like a rack of ribs, that's feral. I can't stop watching this video. We're going to have to put this on socials, I think. Also, surely it can't be good for the dog's digestion. It's okay to give them a little bit of a lick, but letting them lick every plate,

I feel like it's just going to make the poor dog sick, no? No, I don't think it's going to. Well, I mean, it could make him sick. Linda, I just want to say I'm in two minds about this because we have a dog and a cat in our household, and we, for our cat especially, we have like a little side plate and we interchange it. It's just like a little bread plate.

Entree. Yeah, like a little entree plate but we don't have a specific cat plate so that goes in the dishwasher and then it goes back into the drawer and another one comes out. So who knows? Everyone's eating off the cat plate but the dog plate in the dishwasher just feels different. Linda.

So I think I'm taking your husband's side on this one. You know how? Oh. Okay, so I'm hearing appalling. Oh, bless. I'm just hanging my head in shame. We're so sorry to shame you. No, I might be convinced because I don't have a dog.

Although, do you know when you wash dishes in the dishwasher and then it comes out and there's still a bit of grime left on them? Like you've kind of got to do it again? Have you found, Linda, that with the dog licking them, you only ever have to do one cycle on the dishwasher? Yes. It's so environmentally friendly. No, it's not because of the dog licking.

Mitch, if your dishes are not coming out clean, you need to clean the dishwasher. You know that you need to clean the dishwasher, right? You don't know that, did you? No, it's a dishwasher. You don't need to clean the dishwasher. You have to clean the dishwasher. There's a filter?

You're disgusting. Linda, we're so sorry, but I'm on your husband's side. I'm sorry, Linda, but yeah, I'm on team husband. Okay, I asked a question. I'm hearing the decision. You can't be unhappy with your husband. But your dog's very cute. Your dog's cute.

I disagree. It was feral. It was like a mutt. It had teeth coming out the sides and had a tongue. It wasn't a good dog. Speak for yourself. I'm not going that far. All right, so I completely put my foot in it yesterday

and something happened. And I honestly, I can't stop thinking about it because part of me feels bad, but also it's one of those situations where you're like, oh, that could only happen to me. That could only happen to me. What did you do? You can be very blunt, like, you know, we love you, but sometimes you deliver news. Would you agree, Britt? And then Laura is straight to the point.

Am I? Oh, yes. A hundred percent. Yeah. You are. There's no buffer. In a bad way or a good way? You go straight for the jugular.

Most people nibble. You're not afraid of confrontation, which I admire. I think I am, though. That's the problem. I don't think you are. Do you have a therapist perhaps? I can recommend a good one. So the reason you made someone cry, physically or emotionally?

Definitely. I'm not physical. When we talk about confrontation, I'm not out like picking fights on the street. She didn't punch someone in the ear. No, I mean did you like accidentally trip someone over and they cried? I didn't actually go for the jugular. No. So yesterday we were on a photo shoot.

No, I wasn't in the photo shoot. I was direct in the photo shoot. So I have a jewellery label, Tony May, you know, there you go, a bit of publicity. Yeah. Um, but we had a, we had a photo shoot yesterday and, um, and I get to be the creative director of these shoots and it's really fun. And it's a whole thing. You've got the model, you've got your photographer and you've got a whole team.

There's about 15 of us there and the model comes in and I've worked with her before. She's like stunning, beautiful young girl. She's only like in her mid twenties and she's usually really animated, but she was a bit flat and I was like, oh, you know, we all have these days where, you know, you're not on your, you're not on your best A game. and the problem was though is that this shoot it wasn't just like a model like you know striking blue steel poses I needed her to be animated I needed her to be excited and to like and be really expressive right so we get in there and we've done a few different looks and a few different

shots and I was like oh god she's just not we're not quite there she's not quite getting it so I was like okay you know what I'll do I'll call out different expressions for her to do yeah so I'm standing to the side and she's obviously there you know getting photos taken I was like so this is what we're gonna do hun i'm gonna call out an expression and you're gonna act out that expression so if i say happy it's like you're gonna be happy i know it was it was like spoon feeding it okay so i was like okay all right everyone so on the count of three you're gonna be shocked and so then she did a really good job she did a shock i feel like i'm at like a play group like a preschool but it was great it was great and and she really started to warm up and we were actually getting photos in

the way that we needed them okay but the photo that i needed was i didn't want her to be too over the top, like, shocked or happy, I needed, like, a bit of a coy, happy, surprised look, which is a very specific kind of look. That's hard to nail. You're a shocking director. You're like Scorsese. No one can do those three emotions.

Show me that look right now for us. Just, like, how'd you do that? Do it. It's, like, it's a close. Laura just batted her eyes. She was Shirley Temple. I wish everyone could see what just happened in here. It's, like, no.

It's, like, you need to have a bit of a smize, you know. It's closed mouth. Like this? Oh, yeah. Well, no, a bit more excited. Can I try? Directly. Okay.

Okay, well, no, because if I was directing you, I would say certain things to get you to, okay. But give me your look. No, you're terrible as well. Okay, anyway, so we started off with shocked. Shocked was a bit too expressive. Then I was like, okay, give me happy shocked. And she gives me happy shocked.

And I was like, settle down. Too much. Like, yeah, take the top off that one. All right, so we went through a couple of other expressions and she's getting there. She's warming up. She's warming up. And I was like, all right, when you're booking someone

for a photo shoot, you usually stalk their social media first, right? So you go on, you look at their social media because you don't want to just look at their model photos. You also want to look at the way that they shoot when they're just being candid, just to really get like the true look of what these people, you know, how they can be expressive. So I knew she's got a boyfriend. They've been together for ages. Like he's beautiful.

The two of them look like they've fallen out of the sun. They're so glorious together. Right. So I was like, okay, honey, imagine, imagine that your gorgeous boyfriend is about to propose and you know, but you're trying to keep the secret. Great. And then she bursts out crying. burst out crying and I was like that's sorry that's not the expression that I need right now

um he had broken up with her the day before no wonder she couldn't express anything she was dead inside she was so sad you've been with for a decade you love him you know his parents you've invested he's proposing to you man that fell from the sun yeah yeah that was a real imagine your glorious boyfriend is about to propose to you and you have to pretend like you don't know. Tears. What did she say? Did she tell you? How did you find out? She kind of just went a bit manic. She started laughing

for a second and then burst out crying and I was like something's gone terribly wrong here. But apparently they'd all been talking about it prior so the makeup artist, the photographer, they'd all had a massive conversation but I was so busy prepping I just hadn't heard it and had no idea so I just seemed like I was super insensitive. Laura's walking around like

De Niro backstage going happy sad, happy sad, mad, mad sad, smile is coy. Shmize, shmize, shmize and get dumped. This poor model's crying in the corner. Everyone's around. Laura's doing it. Got clown faces on. Comedia dell'arte. Laura, that is horrible. And were you like, sorry? Well, the worst

part was I was like, oh god, your makeup's getting ruined. We're going to have to stop down. You are an insensitive sociopath. Let me tell you a story about how I think my relationship could be over and I might need to move out of home all in the same day. I love story time from Mitch Cheery.

Yeah, a bit of fun. But every week you come and you say, hey guys, I still live with my parents but I know I should move out because this thing happened. At some point in time, you're going to tell a story and it might actually end with, I'm moving out now. He's never moving out. Because it's gone too far. Well, I'm not 30 yet.

Give me two more years and then I'll be 30. Then I might think about moving out in a 12-month process. I moved out at 18. Yeah, same. I moved out at 18. Is it because you're just saving money? Like what is it about living at home that you're... Hey, I had a funny little story to tell the country

and now this has become why you're still at home. I will move out. I moved back home. I did move out. I'm just back. Because he lives, babe. Because he lives, baby. From back home.

And this happened, God, on the weekend, right? Me and my boyfriend, Stephen, came home from dinner. We went out to dinner separately. We came home to an empty house. You went out, what do you mean you and he went out separately? Well, I went out, not with my family. It was just the two of us having dinner. Yeah, so you and Stephen went to dinner.

Can you start, that story was a terrible start. Was it? Yeah. I thought you meant you went to dinner and he went to dinner and then you met back up. No, no, no. He and I went to dinner together. I mean, not with my family.

Because we live at home. We have dinners together all the time. Right. So your family were also out. That's right. The house was empty. Thank you. You got home.

Yes. So we thought, God, we have some time to strike. The house is empty. I live with my sister and my mum and dad. Is that what we're calling it now? So it was more of a spare. It wasn't my best night, but we got it down. And now we heard my family come home upstairs.

And they're upstairs. Oh, they're home. It's all good. I heard them settle and go to bed. We'd sort of finished in the bedroom. And I leave my bedroom and I walk past my sister's. Her door's closed. I'm like, great.

She's in bed. It's all good. I walk past the communal living room and it's pitch black. And I go, oh, my God. Stephen, you're good to come out. Because sometimes I'm like, don't walk out naked in front of my family. He's already out of the closet, isn't he? Yes, he is.

But we run out naked after the shower to go have a shower, you know. Yeah. But everyone's gone to bed now, as in like your family or all asleep. Correct. And everyone's upstairs except for my sister. So we're clear. So we run into the shower. We have a shower together.

It's gorgeous. It's really fun. And then we run back in. What is this story? We run back in. We go to bed. It's all good. We wake up the next morning and we thought we got away with it, Scott, three.

We walk out of the bedroom. Can't speak. I'm so nervous. Is this a disaster? No. I go into the kitchen and there's my Aunty Karen. And I go, oh, Aunty Karen. She moved in too?

Yeah. Where did she go from, Aunty Karen? Everyone's living in this house now. And Aunty Karen, first thing she says to me is, oh, good moaning. Oh. So wait, your Aunty Karen stayed the night? Aunty Karen stayed the night in the communal living room downstairs next to my bedroom. Aunty Karen is very punny.

Told you it was a good story. That was a clincher in the end. Aunty Karen was awake playing Candy Crush Saga on her iPhone when Stephen and I went from my bedroom to the shower, butt naked, frolicking like little cherubs in the forest. We got away with it, Scott Free. Look at your little butt. I wouldn't be worried about the visual.

She heard you. No, I'm worried about the visual. So she's just laying there in the dark. Your poor auntie. Yeah. You should be apologising to her. I know. I feel like she should have let you know.

No, that's when you have to let someone know you're there like, ahem, like you have to do a cough. You have to let them aware that they've snuck into the house. Britt, imagine that though. Imagine running in the dark from the bathroom to your bedroom and hearing someone cough in the dark. Yeah, Britt, wouldn't you rather have a cough than not know someone is lurking in the shadows?

Not if you're already completely naked and halfway through the living room, I'd rather just not know. Matt, give me a cough. What should she have done? You know the Jurassic Park movies where they're like, if you see a Tyrannosaurus, just stand really still. That's what she was doing. She was frozen on a candy crush.

Biddy bing, biddy bing, biddy bing. I thought I could hear something. But she was such a good auntie, Auntie Karen. Shout out, I love you. She looked me in the eyes and she just said, good morning, and didn't tell my parents, didn't tell anyone. But you don't get in trouble for having meep? No, no, no.

But it was kind of like, I know, I heard it, I'm mentally scarred, but I'm not going to bring it up. I don't know how I would feel if I, as a grown woman, heard my nephew, Archer, he's now only a little boy, but I'm just trying to imagine and put myself 20 years from now, I don't know how I would feel if I heard him having sex. I don't think I'd ever recover. You're adults, right?

I mean, besides me, she doesn't act like one, but you're of the age of consent. She was there at my christening and she was there when I became a man. Stephen's christening. Sorry. Time to go home. Hey, Mitch, get that trigger finger ready, please. Yeah.

I have a message for all the single ladies. That's your best radio you've ever made. Terribly not on cue, but anyway. You'd be the worst conductor in the opera house, mate. No, it's good. Just slightly off the beat. I am excited about this. I want to talk to all the single people out there,

not just the ladies, but the men too. Beyonce, we don't discriminate here. Single people. Yeah. I heard this new theory. Like, I was someone that was single for the better part of 10 years, so I love hearing these new theories. but I heard this new theory about like how to suss if someone's single

because I used to always go for the very obvious. I would just say, hey, do you have a girlfriend? Which I think is really effective, although we all know some people do lie and say no. I always go for the glance down for the ring, but it doesn't always work because a lot of men don't wear a ring. Yeah, but also some people might not be married yet. It doesn't mean they're not in a relationship.

No, I know, but the ring's just something you would check for, right? It's like the step one and then you weed it out. But anyway, I was talking to a friend of mine And it had this amazing theory and I was like, I just can't believe I've never thought of that. It's called the rain theory. Have you heard of it? No, I've never heard of the rain theory. The rain theory is very simple.

It's like if it's one of those nights and it's horrific weather, you know, it's proper raining, it's storming, there could be lightning and thunder, who knows. But it's just, it's not sunshine and roses, right? If it's raining and you are single, you're going to go out, aren't you? Because you're like, I want to go meet someone. If you are in a relationship and it is pouring outside, tell me what you're doing, Mitch Cherry. You're staying inside. You're cuddling up, you're watching Stan and you're just relaxing inside.

Yeah, I'm with you. I do not know if I agree with this because if I was single and it was pouring rain outside, it would still take a lot for me to get any sort of courage to get up and go outside. No, yeah, I know I went on The Bachelor and it rained when I was in there too, but I am lazy when it's raining. No, it's true. No, I think a general rule of thumb though, you're right,

if you're out drinking. Single people still go out. Yeah, same when it's cold or it's bitterly wet. If you're out, you have one reason to be out and that is because you want to find someone. 100% because people that are that loved up and don't need to, they'll be like, you know what, I'll catch up with my friends next week when it's sunny.

Like you're not going out in that weather. So are you saying that if you're single, the only time you should be like confident that everyone else who is out is also single? I'm not trademarking the idea wholeheartedly. I don't want anyone to go out and then come for me and say, Brittany said everyone out was going to be single. But Brittany, you've said this before.

You reckon, and I mean, you've got the equivalent like a gaydar, right? For like if you're trying to suss if someone is gay. But Britt, you think you have a single radar where you can tell if someone is in a relationship or not based on the fact that you were single for so long. And so you have canvassed the whole of the population. It is a lived experience. Yeah. As I said, I was single for a decade and I dated in every country, race, religion, high occupation, you name it. I went on a date with it.

I did. In the search for my soulmate. Do you think you could pick the single person in the lineup of humans? Oh, hundy. Easy. How do you pick it? Apart from asking questions or looking for signs, what is it about someone that gives off a single or a dating vibe?

I think when you're in person, obviously there's a lot of context, right? Like wherever you are, the location depends. Bowling club in the day, playing bowls, you can't tell for sure, right? But if you're at a bar, there's a vibe. That's so specific. Well, I was just trying to think of places that I actually go. But there's an energy that people put out for sure. and if you go and speak to someone, the energy they give you back is a lot.

They're either going to give you an energy of like, I'm interested to continue this because I'm single or they're going to give you, I'm being polite but it's obvious that I'm not here for it. So what about if they aren't in a relationship but they're just not interested? Is that energy the same or does it differ? I'll always say you will know if somebody is interested.

If you are wondering, oh, I don't know if they're interested, chances are they're probably not. I hate to say it though, you are a gorgeous brunette woman. That doesn't happen. That's why Brit's like, because if they're not interested, they're in a relationship. There's no other reason. That's exactly right.

If they're single, they want me. And if they don't, then they're married. That doesn't happen for everyone, Brit. Excuse me, guys. I cannot tell you how many times I have been rejected. I have been rejected that many times. How was that one blind guy? That was some of your best radio.

Thank you so much. I do think I have got it down to a fine art. I think if you went and got three people out there right now in the office that I don't know, So two questions max, one minute max, I reckon I could tell you if they're single. Let's do it. Let's put it to the test. Grace, can we get some of the pickup team out there, the KISS staff?

I reckon I can wrangle some people. But don't tell us single. We just want names. We need two people that she knows. Like she has no idea whether they're in a relationship or not. No, I don't want to know about their life. Britt's famous. She doesn't know the stuff.

She doesn't care. She'll be fine. Tell me their names. Rubbish. I know everyone. Sally, John, Alex, Mads. We don't have any people. It's not true.

There are a couple of cutouts. Let's do Britt's singles test. Brittany Hockley, our very own, thinks that she could choose a single person out of a line-up. She reckons she knows if you're single or in a relationship just by looking at you. Yeah, okay. Also, was this because it's like the aura?

Is this because you have some sort of psychic abilities around people who are single or in relationships? No, do not run with that. I'm not a psychic. I don't want anyone here to think that someone walks into a room and I'm a psychic. No, I just feel like I've always been able to pick up people's energy. You are nuts.

I'm not a psychic, but I can pick up the energy of whether you're in a relationship or not. Well, energy in terms of like if you're at a bar or a club or you're out and the way someone speaks to you or responds if you've spoken to them, people put out different energies usually if they're single. If they're single and interested, usually you know. I've always said if someone's not interested, you know.

All right. Well, what we're going to do is we're going to put it to the test. We've gone to the Kiss FM staff room. Please enter. Staff is here at the picker. We've got Maz, Alicia and Josh. Welcome to the show, guys. Come on in.

Let's get you ready. Hi, guys. Thanks for coming. What a good-looking bunch of people. How could any of you possibly be single? That's the real question. I don't reckon any of them are single, and I haven't even asked the question yet.

Why don't we get Maz up to the microphone here. Maz, you can go first. Beautiful Maz. Gorgeous. Look at that skin. How could Maz possibly be single? Hi, Maz. You look beautiful today.

So, Laura, why don't we let the white witch do her thing? I think she just flirted with me. Maybe that means she's single. I think that's just you, mate. Maz, what was the last holiday you went on? um i went to the sunshine coast in december right where did you stay i actually stayed in a family it was a family's property it was an apartment on prigion beach oh she's not she's not single she's not single she's in a relationship no one stays on a family property if you're single

maz i'm in a relationship she's all loved up out of the studio look she's gorgeous of course she's got someone look at those glorious superpowers as well. Josh, step on up. Come on, Joshy. All right, the only male in the lineup. Josh is wearing gloves, let it be noted, that you can't see whether he's wearing a ring or not,

so he could be married under those gloves. Yeah, okay. So that does make it hard because normally I would go for the ring, but I don't know if we're in a bar situation, I don't know well enough to say take your gloves off. So I've got to go for something else. A bit of eye contact, a bit of a... No, because look, Josh is too happy, so he smiles at everyone.

So he's probably flirting with me too. He's getting laid. Is that what you reckon? I'm just kidding He had a good night No, Josh Do you have flatmates? No

He's in a relationship Wow Josh I am That's two for two so far That's incredible This is really impressive Okay, way more impressed

Than I thought it would be Do you know why? Because Britt was single For so long This is like a learned skill She speaks their language She was like literally Single for a decade

That she's like Oh, okay I know what it is to be No, because she's seen Them all on the apps She's been single for that long No, she was like I never saw you on the app, so you must be in a relationship.

That's why. All right, last one. And I think, I mean, I've worked in this building a long time. One of the hardest nuts to crack, Alicia. She is hard. Oh, yeah. Hi, Alicia. Hi.

Just step up to the mic. Don't be shy. Oh, are you shy? What does that tell me? Okay. Hi, Alicia. Hi. How am I going to tell if Alicia's hiding her hands?

Okay. No wedding ring. She's there. Hands are okay. Brunette, of course. What do you think, Alicia, of the prompts on dating apps, on the Bumble? You know the prompts on Bumble?

Yeah. Yeah, know them well. She doesn't. She's in a relationship. She's in a relationship. She doesn't know the prompts on Bumble. Even I, in your face, the second we said prompts on Bumble, even I was like, oh, she's in a relationship.

This is terrible. I've never been on a dating app. You've got a partner? Yeah. Oh, for God's sake. Wow, that's impressive. Ladies and gentlemen. Guys, just give me some applause.

I mean, no, no. I'm impressed. Give me applause. If that was ever, like, I mean, it's one of those skills that you're never actually ever going to need in life, but genuinely. I've used them my entire life. Okay, but you've still managed to date guys who were in relationships and cheating on their partners.

So how did that happen? Bro, I didn't know at the time. That's what I mean. He wasn't single. No, because that was because I was in the relationship with him, then they cheated. So I bagged them. Also, this is a superpower, but it also adds nothing to anyone's life. It's like we've got the worst party trick you could find out.

Can we just ask, everyone else, are you impressed by what just happened? I'm impressed. There's a lot of, yeah, there's impressed. At least you couldn't hear. Look at how impressed everyone is. It's kind of like the opposite of a gay dart. I love it, Brit.

They definitely don't pay me enough. I think they do. I think you're okay. I don't know if you need to get paid more for that skill. Excuse me? How many people do you know that have that? That was smooth. Smooth.

It was very good. Smooth. I don't, it does not work like that. This is it. I thought I could just point at you and like, like, like he's the Rolodex of songs.