Life Uncut - UNCUT with Michael Theo from Love On The Spectrum

Episode Date: November 29, 2021

Welcome to your Tuesday Lifers!Step right up because this is an episode that (according to our DMs) you've all been waiting for! Michael Theo from Love on the Spectrum is joining us today to chat all things like:-his dating life-his experiences of Love on the Spectrum-how autistic people can alter from neurotypical people-his new podcast - & of course going on the Ellen Degeneres show!We were really grateful to have Michael join us on the pod!Today's episode kicks off with some talk about the rarity of taking the wife's surname in a marriage, and whether it's okay or not to publicly express your love for your ex... when you have millions of followers.If you like the ep, share it with someone that you love and leave us a cheeky review! 5 stars would be ever so kind!We love love!!!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura and I'm Brittany and it's been a long week. Has it? I don't know. You know what every week at this time of year is a long week. I feel like when we're at the end of the year, it's close to Christmas. Every single person and every single business in existence is just being inundated with people trying to get things done before everyone goes on break. So I feel like everyone can relate right now. It is just a manic time of year. All that everyone has done for like the last four days is spend all their money in Black Friday sales. Why are we surprised every year that we get to this point and we're like, oh my God, we're so busy. Like we're so stressed. We know what happens.

we know it's coming and every year we're like why are we so stressed and I don't mean us I mean every human in existence like this happens every year I was thinking about it and I was like yeah actually it's very true it's exactly it's exactly the fucking thought I've been having this last week okay no Black Friday was busy but I also do you know what happens for me it's like a busy time for work but I always forget to buy stuff from other brands so then it comes and it goes and then I go and buy all my Christmas presents for full price because I'm that person that still buys their Christmas presents the day before Christmas? So am I. I actually didn't. And I meant to, I had intentions. I didn't buy anything on Black Friday week. There's been things I

haven't bought for the last couple of weeks. Cause I'm like waiting for Black Friday, waiting for Black Friday. There's two types of people in this world. There's people who buy their Christmas presents early and there's people who don't. And that's me. I don't. I'm so disorganized. So if you're someone who doesn't, you are here in very good company, but I want to tell you, Britt had a moment on the weekend. So Matt and I, we went out for dinner. a good moment a bad moment a weird moment you have a lot of moments had a moment we had a date night i think i saw this was a double date night we went out with our friends who also have a kid who also got babysitters i was like who the hell is that well who is this other friend that laura

has that's not me isn't it funny when you have like your one girlfriend and anytime they have other friends you're like how dare you how dare you be friends with other people it's like i told laura i'm just interrupting hijacking your story for a second here i told laura the other day she was like what'd you do and i said oh i caught up with this friend and i said her name and you were like what you're like who is that oh you don't what I've never heard of that I was like oh it's a friend that's like from a circle you don't know about and you were just so gobsmacked that I knew anyone else well I was like stop making friends with other people your time is limited I don't understand why you would spend it with people that aren't me okay we've all got that friend

but no okay so we went out for dinner and we were supposed to have this really cute date night and your girl had a couple margaritas I was like trying to hold Matt's hand through dinner we've been together for a long time now we're not like very public displays of affection couple that we haven't been out for so long so I was like I had my hand on his leg that I was trying to hold his hand and I was getting progressively drunker through the night so I was like becoming more like wanting to hold his hand and he was completely fucking oblivious to the fact that I had been trying to hold his hand for the entire night and we got home and then I picked a fight with him about why he wouldn't hold my hand so of course she did because you were four margaritas tape

but what do you mean you would like okay talk me through this how do you try to hold someone's hands i feel like that's what you do on a first date the movies where you slowly move your hand over and they don't know when they reach for the popcorn then you're like that was awkward when you've been together for years and you got kids don't you just grab their hand yeah like i was holding his hand but then he just wasn't into it like he would hold it for like three seconds and then pat me and then go and use his hands to talk and stuff so he doesn't like pdas well no he does normally so he just did the hand drop and that made me think do you you all know the taylor swift we've all seen the movie we've all the 10 minute movie whatever it is did you take your

scarf. He did the hand drop. He just kept doing the hand drop. And don't worry. I made him know about it. We got home and I was like, I was trying to give you affection all night and you gave me nothing. And what did he say? And he was like, oh yeah, you were trying to hold my, he's like, sorry, sorry, babe. He's like, I honestly just didn't think he's like, you never try and hold my hand at dinner. And I was like, yeah, but I did multiple times. He was like, I know, I'm sorry. He's like, I'll be more aware of it next time. And I was like, that's not good enough. And then I made him say sorry probably about 15 times and then we went to bed and I was still harping on about it and he was like can you fucking let it go okay this will be a problem with me for the rest

of my life I am such a physical person like physical touch is my thing whether it's my friends whether it's my partner whomever my family if you're within reach or even if you're not like I'll do a stretch to touch you but I will be touching you at all times yeah it's a real problem with me like wherever I am whatever time of day touch me I'll be touching you okay does anybody else do this if you're having a petty argument with your partner this is terrible advice don't do it do not do this but if you're having a petty argument about something that's insignificant or maybe it's not insignificant but do you like do little tests so in my mind as I had had a few more this is not going to be good I was like like I'd realized that I was trying to

hold his hand and he wasn't holding mine so I would then purposefully do it and then every time he didn't hold my hand back I was like oh mental note gonna get angry about that later like it was like a test you're putting tallies in your head you're like one yeah so that later in the night you can do you did this 27.5 times literally that's what I did yeah okay I don't encourage this don't don't test your bar maybe if you're full margarita's deep but otherwise terrible terrible things anyway we're great we had makeup sex last night it's been like the first time in a on maybe that's deep down subconsciously maybe that's why you're picking the fight because you wanted a an excuse and b make up sex well I just I think I was missing the intimacy and we've been

really stressed and busy with work recently and like the kids and it's just sometimes as you guys know you have ebbs and flows in when you're so busy you can get to a point where like as much as you love each other you're just not holding hands and you become a bit transactional with taking care of kids you sometimes have to stop and be like oh that's right like I really really freaking love this person and I want them to know that I love them but you have to kind of make sure that they're reciprocating it because otherwise it doesn't feel good well it's hard to because at the moment you have like a little jailbird of a child like it doesn't help that you've got a little kid that breaks out of a cot every night and climbs into your bed but 100% like no I'm

not going to encourage anyone else to pick a fight to have sex but for you Laura I'm proud of you before we get into any more because there are still two other relationships that I want to talk about but I want to tell you what the episode is today it is such a beautiful episode it's an episode that we have wanted to do for a long time and you guys have actually requested this man the man of the hour for many many months we have Michael from love on the spectrum now love on the spectrum if you are behind the times you have to do yourself a favor and watch it it is it's like the modern day bachelor but for people on the spectrum people with so much more wholesome so much more wholesome people with Asperger's and autism it's a reality show but it's pretty

unproduced it's very much let's just see how they go in these environments now there's two seasons now Michael Theo who we're speaking to today he was the breakout star of season number one he came back for season number two I don't want to tell you too much because you should watch it and you should listen to the episode but he was just such a lovable and vulnerable character he's recently just become absolutely huge he's been on Ellen DeGeneres Kim Kardashian has shouted him out he's very much the man of the hour because Love on the Spectrum Australia was screening in the US and the UK we're so stoked to talk to Michael and it's just to really get to know Michael outside of the reality tv show it's who he is when the cameras aren't on him and he let

me tell you is an absolute dreamboat we also did another episode earlier in the year in June it was Episode 132, if you want to go back and listen to it, it was all about Love on the Spectrum. We interviewed Jodie Rogers, who is the therapist and psychologist that works on Love on the Spectrum. We also interviewed Cassandra, who was another participant. So if you want to know more about the ins and outs of how the reality TV show works, that is all talked about in that episode. This is just a really, it's a really heartwarming and wholesome chat with Michael about who

he is as a person, about why he signed up to do reality TV and what it's like dating when you are somebody who has Asperger's. But we'll get into that interview in a little while. Firstly, before we do, I really want to talk about Laura Henshaw and her new husband, Dolt Henshaw, formerly known as Dalton Graham. Now, for anybody who doesn't know who Laura Henshaw is, she is a relatively prolific Instagram, social media influencer. She is also the co-founder of Keep It Cleaner, which she does with Steph Claire Smith. It's an exercise app program. she's incredibly successful and a powerhouse of a woman and last Friday she got married in Victoria's Yarra Valley now the big thing that's come out from this wedding and something that a

lot of the media outlets have picked up and are talking about is that they have completely gone against tradition and instead of Laura subscribing to traditional views and taking on Dalton's last name which was Graham Dalton has actually taken on her last name which is Henshaw after the wedding on Friday Dalton did post a photo and it was a really beautiful photo and can I just say also this is the fourth time they've tried to get married the poor things cancelled their weddings four times throughout COVID but he did put this really beautiful photo of them up cuddling looking into each other's eyes and he said you can still call me Dalton, Dalt, Dolphin whatever you like I am still the same me and always will be just going to sign off on one chapter and start another

with my beautiful, driven and inspirational wife by my side as Mr. Henshaw. I just think that is the most beautiful post. And it just had such a warm reception. Everybody was really positive and really supportive. And I love to see it because that is not always the case. No, I think that this is such an, like, it's beautiful to see how many people have jumped on this. I think like there is this expectation. Well, I don't think, I know there is a huge expectation that women will take their husband's last name but there are so many reasons why a guy might decide especially in 2021 actually do you know what I'm not that attached to my own last name and the last name of my partner is so significant to them so therefore like let's go

against tradition and let's take her last name I mean for some people it could be that they don't have a strong connection to their own family or I know somebody else who's taken their last name of their wife and it's because she was the last of their generation there was no other brothers to take on and to continue the family name and so he took on her last name so that their children would have a chance of continuing their heritage but it's just so interesting to see one the commentary around it has been so incredibly supportive but even though there have been a few celebrities and people who are in higher powered positions doing this recently it is still incredibly rare for a man to take on a woman's last name from the studies that have been done

only one to two percent of men will actually take on their wife's last name and I think you know we see more and more the hyphenated names, but it's very rare that we see a husband fully taking on the last name of a wife. Now, Brian Powell, who's a professor of family and gender at Indiana University in Bloomington, he said that there is still so much social stigma around a husband taking on his wife's last name. He said that there is so much worry that a man will be seen as less of a man. It increases the likelihood that others will think of the man as less dominant, as weaker in the household. Powell also went on to say that with any non-traditional name choice, the man's status goes down in public perception. Isn't it fucking crazy that we still live in a world that

as much as we think that we are relatively progressed, 70% of people think that a woman should take the man's last name. Yeah, it actually comes from this patriarchal history that the man owns the woman. That's where it comes from. It's not about like seeming like you're a family bond. back in the heyday it was that okay you are now mine you're my possession and I own you and the fact of the matter is whilst it's not about ownership it's just one of those traditions that seems to be grounded and rooted in history but would Matt ever take your name no we've talked about it he said no so you asked him yeah I asked him are you gonna take his name so I think no yeah I'm gonna take his name I guess I'm not hugely attached to my last name and that's in no

disrespect to my dad or no disrespect to my family but I come from a broken family like my parents are divorced and so a last name never held that strong family unit for me my mum has had two actually my mum has had three different last names so I guess for me it hasn't really held that strong a bond or that integrity to it so I'm not attached to it but in the same way like Matt also he's not hugely attached to his last name but I know he doesn't want to take on burn like we've had that conversation but he hasn't said why well I guess as well like for us it's not that you know my business is not attached to my name it's not part of my identity so far in a way that like if I had written an awesome paper and I wanted people to be able to research me and go

yes like that's that's Laura Byrne or I was a celebrity like I get it I get why people become really attached to their names Pia Muhlenberg who is also a quite a famous Instagram influencer her husband recently took her last name his last name was Cain Vado and he took on Muellenberg as his last name it is definitely happening more and more and I do think that we're talking about it in a way that's progressive and there is a huge portion of people who are like yes like we love a man who supports his woman but in the same instance I do think that there is still a lot of misogyny that is deeply entrenched in this and you know as much as Dalton has received accolades publicly on his social media. If you do a deep dive into the internet, it's a pretty dark area

in regards to this. And there are a lot of people who speak very negatively about men who take the woman's last name. Yeah, I'm all for it. I think it doesn't matter. The reason doesn't matter either. If you have a conversation as a couple and you decide that you want to unite under one name, it doesn't matter whose name, it doesn't matter what it's for. I think that's great. And yeah, unfortunately there are still people that can't get on board with it, but the more people that do it and openly speak about it, the quicker it's going to change and the more it's going to become accepted. Totally. I just want to leave with one last thing. So according to a 2017 study that came out in Portland, which is obviously a United States based study, but it said that 70%

of people said that women should take their husband's last name in marriage. The most common reason people felt was that this is because they believe that women should prioritize their marriage and family ahead of themselves and taking their husband's last name symbolize that according to the study. So it just shows that even though we have come such a long way in the meaning behind what marriage is. The fact that, like you said, Britt, it originally was rooted in this idea that as females, you were attached to your father. He had ownership of you. That's also why he walks you down the aisle at a wedding and gives you away to the husband because he's transitioning that ownership from him to your now husband. And this idea that you now as the wife, as the bride

are going to take the husband's name is that you are in some ways subordinate and then you become absolved into his family so it has these very archaic concepts around it but we are still attached to the idea socially that a woman has to take the man's last name don't even get me started on same-sex marriages because how do you choose in those instances I think you just you just chat about it if no one's attached to it or there's someone's brands attached to a name or maybe someone's worked really hard to have a doctorate or something like that like whatever the reasons are between you two you just decide within each other there's no right or wrong I don't think anymore and also there are a lot of couples that might not want to take each other's

name at all and they individually keep their names a lot of actors are like that like Ryan Reynolds Blake Lively jumped to mind like they've created a life for themselves they've worked really hard and they wanted to keep their separate names I don't think it matters what I want to say is I don't think it matters I think as long as two people in a relationship come to the same agreement and it's obviously going to get tricky if there's kids involved do you want the kids to have the same name as the parents do you want the kids to have the same name as a mom like there's all these conversations that are just going to be individual to each relationship anyway congratulations laura and dalton we are so no but i love it on instagram we were like what a guy like what a guy

to go and do that it's weird that we congratulate a man for doing it when a woman does it every single day of the week yeah exactly it's the old dad taking the kids to the park again and we're like well done it's a different set of standards isn't it it's like we hold them up to a different set of standards all right moving along i want to talk about one more relationship before we get into the episode we're really we're going a deep dive in relationships right now it just seems to be a lot of it or a lot around at the moment there was not a lot of other things in the news but there was a lot of relationships in the news something that everyone is talking about right now it is literally everywhere it is the current relationship it is the hot topic and that is well i still don't

know how i feel about the relationship kim kardashian and pete davidson now pete davidson is the saturday night live he's one of the hosts if you don't know him he's like he's a comedian he's known as the funny man he's not stereotypically tall dark handsome good looking he's definitely got his quirks but he has landed every hot woman in hollywood he was formally engaged to ariana grande what do you mean you don't know if you're here for this relationship yet i need a little bit more from you brit i'm like there's a lot of judgment there's no judgment but you know how sometimes you just look and I mean like we all get so invested in Hollywood relationships or famous relationships you know how sometimes you see two people get together and you're like yes

I didn't know I needed this this is the best I just I haven't felt that real pull towards them as a couple yeah oh nah you're wrong I love it I think he is so sexy I'm so here for it but also you and I don't often agree on attraction like even though yeah even though no even though we did date the same guy once even though once one time no we do you and I we do we agree on attraction a lot but often who you are like okay it happened recently this week we saw somebody and Laura was said holy shit that guy is so handsome he is so good looking and I was like what guy I didn't even clock him because he was he didn't register to me we are so different that I was like if we were both single at a bar we would be fine because we would not be competing over the same guy wait

do you think Matt said like would you go for Matt if you met him a different if we were on the same season of The Bachelor if we were together and competing would you go for Matt or not? Probably because I'm competitive. You can stay out of my house from now on. No Matt and like I can never answer that question because I've only ever known Matt as yours and so immediately I would never look at someone like that. It's a very safe answer. Yeah it's safe. Lucky we're across the other side. No but it's true the reason I wanted to talk about Kim and Pete it's not just because I think it's like a shock relationship I actually look I actually think it's really cute and I think he's really funny and a lot of people have come out and said that he's actually just the best human

and that has to be evident because he gets the hottest chicks. But what I wanted to talk about is the fact that Kim and Kanye split. It was over. Everyone knows that. It was never coming back. It was buried. As soon as Kim has launched this relationship, all of a sudden she's seen everywhere. There's photographs of her. It's not just whispers anymore. It's out there. The second it was hard launched kanye has come out publicly and he is groveling he is begging he is publicly posting his screenshotting he's tagging her he's doing everything humanly possible he's even talking to his church in his speeches about getting kim back what on earth this is the most awkward situation i have an article here kanye west shares old photo with kim kardashian in new

attempt to win her back so only a day ago Kanye has posted a photo a black and white photo of Kim and him kissing as like part of an attempt to be like I know that she might be in another relationship right now but we are going to rekindle this we are going to reconcile and we're going to get back together and it just made me think I'm sure that there are so many other people who are listening to this podcast who have been in relationships that have expired you know what for whatever reason you have moved on from your ex the minute that you're happy in a new relationship then he comes out of the woodworks and he's like hey what are you doing like how are you i miss you i've fucked up i've never loved anyone as much as i love you why do they do this well that's what

he's done he's come out and he said i fucked up he's like i've made mistakes i made so many mistakes i didn't act the way a husband should act i publicly embarrassed her and he even said like by running for president he even included that which may like at least you can recognize that but this black and white photo that he's put up of them kissing which is a beautiful photo they're in matching sweats he's posted that he's then taken the TMZ headline that said Kanye West says God will bring Kim and him back together and inspire millions he's put that headline over the top of the photo of them kissing then he has tagged TMZ for the news article and he's tagged Kim Kardashian now at the same time Kim's posting photos with her partner what do you think is

going through Kim's mind. I mean, also we know, and it's been very widely reported that Kanye suffers with some mental health problems that he also has bipolar. So there is probably a whole other level here at play. So I definitely think we can't disregard commenting on that, but I'm in agreeance with you. I think that this would happen to so many people on a small scale, but to be a celebrity and to have this play out so publicly is a whole other level. And also I do think that there is a bit of a level of disrespect here. It's like, you know, if somebody is in a new relationship if they're saying that they're happy going out and publicly undermining that relationship by saying what you have is so much more important and yes they have

the history they have years they have children but going out to publicly undermine that over and over and over and using your social media to weaponize it is rather problematic and there's also been and this is all speculation but there's also been a lot of speculation that he cheated on her in the relationship and there was infidelity he's sung about that before there's been a lot reports about it so you didn't act the way you should have in that time in your relationship you haven't tried to get her back until she's launched a relationship with someone else I just wonder and I mean for all of us plebs all of us everyday people not the celebrities because this does happen as soon as you've moved on and you're happy your ex wants you back I just wonder do they

really want them back or is it just the fact that like they don't want them because they didn't want them in the first place but you don't want anyone else to have them is there like this sense of ownership where you're like I don't want to be happy with you but I don't want you to be happy with anyone else or is it the whole idea of like you don't know what you have until it's gone I think there's there's many layers of it I think there is a huge ego attached to it I definitely think that that plays a part in these situations and I know so many people would have experienced their own version of this you know Britt and I were talking about how back in the day I would post Instagram quotes that were very much directed at my ex but I thought that nobody knew except for

him like the really subtle but unsubtle digs when you're trying to like get your ex's attention or even just like the thirst trap photo. Like we've all done it. We've all tried to not necessarily get an ex back, but get an ex's attention via social media. We've all made that mistake. It's just different when you have 300 million followers. And it's different when you post an actual photo of them

and tag them. It's a whole other level. And I do think that there is ego and there is a bit of ownership that's kind of wrapped up in that. Anyway, interesting to see how that old chestnut plays out. But I reckon it's time for some accidentally unfiltered. All right, I have a goodie for you today.

Are you doing an accidentally unfiltered or are you bringing me a confessional? Accidentally unfiltered on my end. Okay. Well, for anyone who's new and doesn't know what accidentally unfiltered is, basically you guys write in your most embarrassing stories for the week or the month or the year. And we pick out our favorites. Decade the existence since you were born. Literally.

We pick out our favorites and we read them out to you. And I have a fucking goodie too. It is rather innocent. It has nothing to do with poo, thank Christ. And here it is. I work in a community pharmacy as a pharmacy assistant so the whole day I'm constantly taking in scripts and handing them out and being at the register today due to the rain and the horrible wi-fi connection our f-boss machine just wasn't connecting to our computer but I had come in late

for the day and no one had told me anyway the first person I ended up serving was a man who was buying Viagra and of course I go to put the transaction through the f-boss machine but it wouldn't connect so here I am I scan the Viagra and I look at my colleague and say to her very loudly i can't get it up to which she looked at the computer and then the viagra and then the computer and then at me thank god we were wearing masks because i could tell that she was holding back the biggest laugh i honestly can't remember the rest because i was so mortified with myself so yeah in short i actually fucking use the phrase i can't get it up in front of a customer buying viagra and i've been constantly overthinking the situation since he was probably like thanks

i've realized that i can't get it up you don't need to tell the rest of the world and announce it over the microphone I just wish that he'd been like yeah babe me too maybe if he's that old he didn't hear her he might not have heard her I don't necessarily think that he was old I think there's like a common misconception that just because someone's buying Viagra at the chemist they must be old maybe you just want to go for a few days or maybe there's a lot of younger guys that have erectile problems as well absolutely either way yes love that was awkward for you very awkward very awkward all right give me yours okay mine's pretty innocent but I think it's super cute it really tickled me years ago when i was dating my first boyfriend who i lost my virginity

to he told me it would be sexy if i got a landing strip style wax as this was my first sexual relationship and i was a bit of a late bloomer i was naturally too shy to go to a beautician i instead decided to take on the challenge myself so i went off to priceline and i got one of those nas packs instead let me tell you i was very proud of my efforts and couldn't wait for the big reveal to my boyfriend who needs a beautician I will never forget his face when he took off my underwear to reveal my freshly waxed landing strip I had completely misinterpreted the definition of a landing strip and I reversed it I had waxed this little I had waxed this little strip down the middle and left the sides untouched and I'm talking full bush I nearly died when he told

me we couldn't stop laughing needless to say I didn't wax myself again but like to be fair it makes sense can you just all stop and just have that visual image and hold it for three seconds like a hairy vagina that is just bald down the slit down the middle honestly it makes sense like you have cleared the strip you have it's ready for landing if you don't know and you think about it that's what would make sense have you ever okay I can't wax I tried waxing once and it was just horrible I got the worst ingrown hairs from waxing that my boyfriend at the time was like maybe you should wax it's so soft like this is anyway i did it and it was a disaster i brazilian wax myself easy i could do it in three minutes that is horrifying to me the fact that you can

give yourself a brazilian so you could wax your own butt crack and you're not like well i don't you're not in agony in paint so just there no but all the vaginal hair like i could do it i have been waxing i have never gone to a beautician for wax i have been able to wax since i was 20 so i like the best part of 10 years anyway I just think that was so innocent and I think she really was the winner here she did she got the brief she did what she was told she created a landing strip okay that is enough of that let's get into this chat with Michael we hope you guys enjoy it if you have an accidentally unfiltered story and this is your call out because we receive so many if you're somebody who has had an accidentally unfiltered story if you've had your most

embarrassing thing and you've been thinking should I shouldn't I each week maybe I'll send it in just send it in we need it and we want it we really love the innocent ones too like you don't if you think that yours is like oh mine's not dirty enough it's not pooey enough we don't have to have those we love the innocent ones and we really like the dirty ones well laura loves it but also if you have a confessional or anything else that you think is worthy of us knowing about please slide on into the dm's life uncut podcast now let's get into the chat with michael michael this is such an exciting day for us because i am such a huge fan of you and the show so welcome to life uncut podcast thank you ladies it's my pleasure can you start michael i feel like

the best way is to try to get to know you a little bit how would you describe yourself in three words I would say that I'm quite a character, undyingly loyal, and apparently a hopeless romantic. We absolutely love hopeless romantics here at Life Uncut. You're from Wollongong. I grew up in Wollongong, so I am very familiar with that stomping ground. What school did you go to? It was Wollongong High School of the Performing Arts. So my mum used to work at Kira High, which is exactly next door to Wollongong High. This is feeling very close to home.

Can you tell me a little bit about what was your childhood like? Who was Michael when he was a kid? Just give me a little bit of a background of that time in your life. Back in primary school, I often sat alone during the breaks because that's what I preferred because I was kind of reserved at the time and I was kind of off in my own world. All I wanted to do was just watch Thomas and that was it. To this day, I kind of look back on all that with some degree of embarrassment. Why do you feel embarrassment about your childhood?

It's because kids these days don't really seem to be like that these days. They seem to be more aware of their surroundings and what's going on in the world. When you say Thomas, you mean Thomas the Tank Engine? Yes, that's right. You're a big fan of Thomas? Yes, ever since I was three years old. I think that there are a lot of kids that like to be by themselves. I don't think that you should look back on that with embarrassment.

I suppose not. And in high school, I started to socialize with the other students more. and as the years passed I became more and more sociable but also in high school I didn't enjoy it because not because of the teachers but because the students were often annoying and also because of the academic side that was the major part of it. Michael you were diagnosed with autism when you were five what was growing up with autism like and what was that period of your life like when you received that diagnosis? Well, I don't really remember the diagnosis, but only my mother does. I was actually diagnosed with Asperger's. It's a milder form of autism.

And what was it like? Well, basically for my parents, it wasn't very easy. I was definitely quite a character back in the day as well. What do you mean by you're a character? I would say probably not normal, according to some people. Different, I suppose. and Michael did you feel different did you know you were or do you think that that's only now when you look back kind of suspected that I felt different my mother never really told me that I had Asperger's until I was 13 because when I was a kid I wouldn't have understood what it meant and can you tell us I guess in your own words or the way I'm sure you've done so much research now and you live with it every single day what is Asperger's to you how can you describe it to

somebody that doesn't know or doesn't understand what it is. Asperger's is basically a motor form of autism. They just have social difficulties at times, but they have a lot of unique gifts as well. And they're still able to do the same things as everybody else in life. They just learn things a different way and they still want to be loved and have friends. You've said before that people who have Asperger's and have autism, that it can be a gift. What sort of gifts does it bring to your life well being able to memorize certain lines from a show be like a walking encyclopedia of facts about certain topics and having this ability to do puzzles in a certain amount of time so do you find michael that you remember everything that you read can you read something just once and

you just sock it away or is it only if it's something that's really interesting to you only something that's very interesting to me so does this mean that you because you went to an art school does this mean that if you were going to read a script or something for acting you'd remember it one time it takes me so long to try and remember a script well i would have to read over the script a few times for it to kick in right so michael you have a sister olivia and a brother named adam are you close with them i don't really consider myself close to them i just have a very friendly loving sibling relationship with them and are they neurotypical or are they do they also have Asperger's they're neurotypical so do you look at your brother as inspiration or

does he teach you anything or do you go to him for advice on dating or life advice I would probably go to him for dating advice well he gave me a bit of paper that had some dating pointers a few years ago oh you've got that paper there yeah the dating pointers are be yourself above all else remain focused on your date. Allow yourself to relax and enjoy the conversation. Look for changes in the way she responds to indicate if she is interested in the topic, the conversation I meant. If she gives you short responses with a flat tone, take this as a sign to change the topic. Allow the conversation to flow naturally and keep your face relaxed while maintaining eye contact. So a couple of things that your brother has said that you have to move on from a conversation if

your date is not seeming interested we've spoken a little bit on this podcast before we actually interviewed Cassandra who was on your season of love on the spectrum oh we interviewed her a few months back and Cassandra spoke a lot about a concept called masking where you sometimes can mask your characteristics of Asperger's or autism by doing things in a way that may be deemed to be neurotypical but that that can be a really exhausting thing to do do you find that you try a mask when you're in social situations and what is that like for you? Nope. I just basically just be myself. That's good. When we spoke to Cassandra in regards to her Asperger's, she described different triggers that for her, you know, that, that can kind of

set her off or make her feel more uncomfortable. Do you have certain things like whether it be loud noises or different experiences that can make you feel more frustrated or it can be more challenging for you? Well, loud noises are definitely a trigger because I hate loud music. And after socializing after an extended period of time, that can also cause me to become tired. And what is the result of that? Do you sort of just shut down and want to go home? I would just remove myself from the situation. Give yourself some time to recharge. Yeah, that's right. Michael, can you talk to me a little bit about Love on the Spectrum? So this has been such a

hugely successful show and you have been incredibly loved as one of the contestants on the show. Why did you sign up to do Love on the Spectrum? It's because I saw it as my best chance to help me find a partner. It was a very enjoyable experience, actually. I always enjoyed being filmed and 95% of the time, I hardly noticed the cameras. That's really good. That's the hardest part isn't it when you feel like this camera's on you and you get a little bit nervous did you find that the show was at all scripted or did they say we want to encourage you to try and do this on this date or we think you should go to this restaurant or did you get to do a lot of it yourself like did you get to choose the dates and stuff like that I suggested dates and

where to go they would sometimes make certain decisions as well but it wasn't scripted no what was the hardest part of the process well the date that i went on with amanda it didn't go as planned it ended before it started oh what do you mean amanda had some kind of panic attack and she had to leave i do remember seeing that but you were such a gentleman in that moment you recognized that she was having a hard time as well didn't you yep i could see that in this experiment so when you were going through the process of meeting the different participants and going on dates. Obviously, you were looking and hoping to find a relationship out of this. What did that look like for you? What does love mean to you?

It's basically an emotional bond between two souls being together. And then eventually it grows into a serious commitment like marriage. It's the spiritual and emotional bond between two souls agreeing to share and spend their lives together. And do you normally, when you're dating, do you normally like to date people who are neurotypical? What do you prefer when you're looking for a partner? I prefer neurotypicals it's because I resonate with them more because my spurge is actually high functioning which means that I guess I'm just as close to being normal I suppose and you dated Heather on the series and you went on quite a few dates with Heather and Michael just

want to tell you that I really really loved the show I remember calling Laura and I said you have to watch this show it's the most beautiful show and obviously it's taken over the world but I remember you going on a few dates with Heather and I thought oh these two have a real connection you were flirting I felt like you were getting along really well and then it didn't quite work out what do you think happened what were your feelings like for Heather in real life because I understand on a show sometimes we see one thing and what real life is another well to be honest I was actually sort of struggling to feel romantic connection with with her at the same time she had several commitments to prioritize. And I was actually quite surprised when a lot of people

in the audience thought that she was ghosting me. And on my part, I was actually trying to feel something special for Heather, but I just couldn't. Do you think you need to feel that spark straight away to date them? If you feel something on a first date, that's actually a bit of a sign. Because if you don't feel anything, it just feels more like a couple of friends getting together. Totally. And there does come a point where if you don't have that spark, there's no point trying to force something so how have you responded to the fame that has come with being on love on this spectrum so many people are interested in your story so many people have loved watching you on tv what's it like to become so famous for your dating it's flattering but also

kind of overwhelming as well because it's like having to answer fan mail where are you at with you're dating at the moment. Still no partner and still nobody to date at the moment. Been conversing with a couple of people, nothing progressing at the moment, but got some hopes. We also interviewed Jodie, who was the, I guess the relationship therapist on the show. Did you use her or go to her for advice at all? Did you find her handy on the show? I did, yes. In fact, she and I keep in touch like once a month amazing and what was her best advice or what did you learn from her because i guess she she helps you along the way the best piece of advice i can remember from her is that most relationships start off from the foundation of friendship and to find also find

common ground you know you said that you haven't yet found someone but like dating is so hard and i think when we first it is it's so hard when we first started this podcast the reason why we started it was because it was a relationships-based podcast where we all talked about how hard it is to find someone and how hard dating can be. What impact do you think having Asperger's has on your dating? Do you find it more difficult that initial, you know, the first date, it's hard as it is. Do you find that it adds an extra layer? I wouldn't say that having Asperger's causes a hindrance on dating. It's just a matter of finding people that are interested. But the thing is i don't know anybody that would be interested in dating a gentleman what do you

mean you don't know anyone who's interested in dating a gentleman isn't that what we all want well let me put it this way if you're a woman who's immature and looking for some moments of drama a gentleman can't provide that it depends on the person and their age as well because when you're in your teenage years there's no maturity and when you're in your early 20s that's when you're slowly starting to phase out of that immaturity process. When you're in your mid-20s, you're getting there, but not quite there yet. And when you get to your late 20s, you're extremely close to completion. And when you get into your 30s, that's when the complete transformation takes place. Michael, you are such a gentleman. And that was one of the things that people fell

in love with about you on the show, on Love on the Spectrum. Where did this come from? Where did this chivalry and this very gentlemanly mannerisms come from my father raised me to be a gentleman is what he taught me to be and he also once told me that there's enough animosity in the world as it is he's a very wise man and he's taught me a lot of a lot of his principles over the years what are some of those other principles he's taught you one of them is if you give good karma you receive good karma if you give bad karma you receive bad karma and treat others the way you wish to be treated that's the golden rule what are you looking for in a partner so you're on the dating site you've gone on love on the spectrum hopefully i mean not hopefully but

we would love to see you back on season three if you are single and you haven't found your match yet but what is it you go into looking for a partner do you have a list like a checklist i'm basically looking for a beautiful loving woman with a pure heart somebody who comes from a good family and does not get involved with weaponry or drugs or commit any crimes or hang out with the wrong people you know things like that and the thing is that I'm very selective when it comes to girls I think you need to be selective though and I think it's important that we as humans we know what we want to look for in a partner otherwise we waste our time what do you think in a relationship is the most important thing well this is the way I see it if you ever

find a partner in life, you should not only be loyal, but also grateful. Because if in the event you lose a treasure as valuable as a woman, there's a chance that you might not be able to get her back. Have you ever been in love, Michael? I've only had crushes on girls, but I wouldn't count that as being in love. It's just infatuation. That happens to a lot of people. But being in love is like holding hands, kissing each other, and maybe also living together and making time for each other as well, even when you are busy. That time is a really big one, isn't it? Especially in this day when people get so busy, it's so hard to make time for anything that's important to you. Yeah. Tell me about it. Can you tell me what are some of the

misconceptions around Asperger's? What is something that you would like people to know about what it's like to live with Asperger's? People on the spectrum, they may not be classified as normal per se, I was using air quotes, they can still do great things. They're capable of making friends and they're capable of feeling loved. They just have difficulties with socializing and just learn things differently. Just because we learn things differently doesn't mean that we're not normal. I think some people who don't understand Asperger's or don't understand autism, there can be this misconception that people who have Asperger's don't have feelings or don't feel things in the same way. What do you think about that? I would disagree with that.

People with Asperger's do have feelings. They just express it differently because there is no one way to show someone that you care about them. There are many ways, whether it be saying it to them in person or by text or by a song or by taking them out somewhere or even send them a gift. There's many ways to do it. I want to talk to you about your podcast that you have started. I know that this is a really exciting new venture for you. Can you tell us a little bit about your podcast, why you started it and the types of people that you're interviewing? I started it because I would like to entertain people, bring love and light into people's lives. And it's also another way for people to get to know me more as a person outside of Love on the Spectrum.

explore some of my interests which i probably didn't discuss on the show and it is also to help inspire people to become an a-plus version of themselves in other words i'm not trying to turn people into me i'm trying to turn them into them you just mentioned that you want people to know more of your interests that maybe they didn't see on the show because we do know on the show that a lot is cut out a lot doesn't make it to screen what are some of your interests like what are your biggest passions that you want people to know about? Acting is one of them and along with railways, animals, nature, spirituality, family and friendships, romance I think, building models, eating out. I preferably prefer eating out with a person one-on-one, a woman preferably and sitcoms

as well. You have some rules for the podcast. What are your rules? Topics that I forbid from being discussed on the podcast include religion, politics, weaponry, drugs, past wars, past shooting incidents. Most importantly, it has a strict no COVID talk policy, which includes no talking about lockdowns, vaccinations, anything related to it. Because after two years of hearing about it daily, nobody wants to hear about it anymore. On the flip side of that, what are some things that make you feel really you? Like what are the things that you love and conversations and topics that you love to talk about? Talking about acting and celebrities and their lives and also television shows because I'm really into pop culture and philosophies on life and how to treat

a woman. With your podcast, you're going to be interviewing a lot of people. Who have been some of your favorite interviews so far shane jacobson has been my favorite one so far who's that oh for god's sake can i guess can you give me a hint sure he was on little big shots and he was the host he was also in those iga commercials and he's also in that film ladies in black he was also the voice of shane in thomas the tank engine ah that's why you love him well shane is is an australian tender engine from Australia a steam engine actually I was pretty excited to talk to him and my mother was quite quite giddy about it as well when she found out well I think it's so exciting it's been a big part of your childhood but also something that's come and been a big part of your adult

life as well yeah who is the number one person in the world if you could pick someone to interview or to come on the podcast who do you think that would be that's a bit of a tough question because I actually have a long list of people that I want to interview there's Mark Evan Jackson Mayim Bialik and my favorite British actress Rossum and Pike there you go now well hopefully they can get the word out and we can get them on your podcast yeah I hope so and now Michael speaking about you love the celebrity life and you and you love famous people in acting you are a celebrity yourself now but you recently went on Ellen DeGeneres is that right I did yes that is congratulations that is huge how did that happen did she reach out to you and just say I love the

show come on well her producers contacted Netflix and Netflix contacted Northern Pictures and they got in touch with me about it and when I found out I was quite surprised to learn that I never expected it although some time ago I did say to myself that I wouldn't be surprised if Ellen ever wanted to interview me she mostly asked asked me about myself and the show and surprisingly she gave me a suit I saw that have you received the suit yet yes does it fit um the pants and the jacket are a little bit big so they just need to be taken up will you wear that on on your next date and then you can tell your date that Ellen DeGeneres gave you that that is huge that is such an in that's an in michael i would yes and also kim kardashian tell us what i have heard some

whispers that something happened with kim kardashian what was that she just basically posted about about the show on instagram which i didn't expect either that is crazy because how many followers does she have i don't know i think like millions and millions 250 or 60 million followers that's no surprise would you do another reality tv show or another love show i would but it depends on if i'd be taken seriously though you don't think you were taken seriously well love on the spectrum is a documentary and i didn't really have any luck on on both seasons but don't know if i would have any any different success on another love show what are your thoughts then when you compare because you said love on the spectrum is a documentary

what are your thoughts on like the bachelor franchise as a love show i never watched it because i'm just not really interested in watching dating shows was it weird being on a dating show yourself though when you've never seen one or seen how it's put together it didn't really feel weird it just felt weird watching myself on screen what do you think is next for you michael i'm actually pursuing an acting career because that's my passion is what i really want to do there's some things going on in the pipeline but and one of them will involve being in the UK but I can't really go into any details about it oh way to hang us on the end of a line Michael how are we ever gonna know the public will know in good time and I will also be continuing with the with the podcast

and also continue on with my quest for love have you ever auditioned for a show to play a character who has Asperger's, is that something that's come up in casting? I don't think that's been the case. Would you? Maybe. It depends if I'd be the right match for it. I also do have a question for you, Brittany. Oh, yes.

Hit me. Do you happen to know anyone by the name of Jackson Garlic? I do. Jackson Garlic is a really good friend of mine. I was on a dating show with Jackson. I know that he's a friend of yours, isn't he? Yeah, even though we've never really met in person yet. And he also invited me to check out his pie business.

I think that he would love to have you and your family for a pie any day of the week. He messaged me actually when I said I was going to get you on and he raved about you. He said, you guys are friends and you're a really good guy. And he was really excited that you were coming on the podcast. But I actually would like to meet him in person as well. Definitely let him know when you're coming to Sydney. He'll meet you somewhere, even halfway probably. Sounds good.

I also got to ask you, Brittany, what kind of acting roles are you wanting to pursue? Would you know what I would love? I would love to do a romantic comedy because I feel like that's true to my life. Like my whole love life has been funny. Like I feel like it's so easy for me to act because everything is ridiculous. Nothing ever works out as planned. It's like I feel like my life is a movie. So I think that would be really easy for me to act.

Yeah, I would say so. I also got a question for you, Laura. What's it like having kids? That is a very big question. It is unrelenting. It is very tiring, but it is the most purposeful, wonderful thing I've ever done in my life. It has been completely transformative for me. And I was somebody who didn't think I wanted kids originally. And now I want more and more and because they're just the most incredible little humans. I have to tell her to stop, Michael. I'm like, no more kids for now. I love being a mum, Michael.

I love it. How many do you have? I have two daughters. Ah, nice. I like that this just turned into you interviewing us. He's a true podcast host. Well, looks like your partner struck gold. Personally, if I was to be a parent, I'd preferably rather have a daughter

because I've always resonated more with girls. I always have. and I'm more comfortable around them. In fact, if I ever had a daughter, I would probably name her Rossamund. Rossamund. After your favorite actress? Yeah, or even Mayim, as in Mayim Bialik, the actress.

Mayim Bialik is an actress who played Amy Farrah Fowler on The Big Bang Theory. And beneath that beautiful face lies a brilliant mind. Oh, right. Yes, I do know who she is. That's one of the most important things in a woman that I'm attracted to. A woman that has a very intelligent mind

because women who are intelligent, I could just talk with them all day. Yes, that is very important. Yeah. And, you know, like they say, looks fade over time. You need to have that connection, that chemistry, and also that great conversation for the relationship to be able to go somewhere. A sapiosexual, they're called.

Did you know that? No. It's someone who's attracted to another person's intelligence. I always have been. Well, then you, Michael, are a sapiosexual. Michael, thank you so much for coming on the podcast and being a part of Life Uncut. We have absolutely loved interviewing you.

You were a joy to watch on Love on the Spectrum. Thanks. For anyone who wants to find you on social media or they want to be able to follow you, where can they find you? On Instagram, MrAPlusMichael. When I say plus, I mean the word, not the symbol. And Michael, if there is anyone out there listening,

because we have a really big audience, we're really, really lucky, and a lot of them are female. Is there any advice you would give the women out there that are struggling with dating or they haven't met their soulmate yet because there are so many of us that just haven't found the right person yet. Is there any advice or motivation that you would give them? I would say don't give up. And if you believe that gentlemen are extinct, you're wrong because that's what I'm trying to prove to women because I'm trying to inspire them

to give them hope, to hope for a better man and so that they can see that gentlemen still exist even though they're quite hard to find. I think that's great advice. Definitely don't give up because love is out there for everyone, isn't it? Yeah. And there's nothing wrong with having high expectations. I would say that if she's out there somewhere in time, I'll know that she'll only be one thing, treasure.

Yes, Michael. What a way to finish. That is such a beautiful line. Thanks. Michael, thank you so much for coming and being a part of the podcast and sharing your experiences with Love on the Spectrum. It was my pleasure. I wish you the best for your future with your relationship

with your partner, Laura, and your daughters as well. And, Brittany, I wish you the best of luck with your acting career aspirations. Continue on with it. And I also wish you the best of luck on your own quest for love as well. You guys know we never finish an episode without our suck and our sweet, our highlight and our lowlight for the week.

Laura. Actually, I'm going to kick start. Go. Come on. i just tried to intro suck and sweet this is this is my song i just tried to intro suck and sweet and every time i went to talk laura quickly said something and i was like you've got to stop talking so i can talk actually that's a lie i was speaking and then brit would start it at the end of my sense so i was still speaking and then she would start it and i was like can you just wait till i

stop speaking and i said we'll just stop speaking and then i'll start talking and then we started yelling at each other but like friendly yelling sometimes we actually just yell at each other like We were literally being like, stop speaking. She's like, just wait. And I'm like, stop. We were just going at each other. Actually, I think the word you used was, would you shut the fuck up, is what was yelled.

We cannot stress this enough. We're literally like sisters and we love like sisters and we fight like sisters. Anyway, her neighbour was at the door. Anyway, so then we're like going at each other and then I hear this little faint knock and I'm like, hello? Because we were recording my lounge room. She's like, delivery?

and I opened the door thinking it was a delivery person but it was my neighbor who had picked up a delivery from downstairs and she's like I'm sorry to interrupt and I'm like you just heard our fight didn't you she was like I did she sounds like you're also having a lot of fun I was like do you know I'm so glad that finally your neighbors have heard the way you treat me Brittany oh eat it the way you speak to me when we're not recording and everyone I just I just I'm glad that I'm finally being validated you guys know we never finish you guys know you keep saying at the top of me going okay stop talking and i'll do it wait two seconds after i finish talking stop to then start stop anyway it was pretty funny because we're like i mean it would not

have sounded like a real fight it sounds like a fake fight like a funny fight but i just thought it was funny that my name was there being like so don't interrupt anyway that's my suck my sweet of the week wait that's gonna be your suck for the whole week sure pretty good week why not my neighbors hate me now it was actually an uneventful week for me so yeah my neighbors hate me no but she did say she's like oh I thought she goes oh you she listens to the podcast uh she's new into my building if she's listening shut up hi hi awkward for everyone she's like oh I did think you were recording because I can hear you laughing from across the hall fair uh yeah so that's my side my sweet of the week is if you follow me on the gram I put some stories up every year I do

this with the RSPCA I love animals but I become a guardian angel of an animal it's anonymous like and I say anonymous in terms of like you don't know what animal you're going to get it's like a random you say you want to help save an animal over the summer over the season and they they give you an animal and they give you the profile so you get a picture of the animal that you're helping to save and you get a bio about them and every year I do it so this year I did it put on my stories and I always encourage you guys to do it and the response this time was so overwhelming I get you guys to tag me they were just like over a thousand people that have gone and sponsored an animal and it doesn't mean you foster them like you don't take them into your house it just means you're

helping to keep them safe and fed and and healthy until they find their forever home but so many of you went and did that and it just it was like the absolute highlight of my month it was the best thing it was so heartwarming to see and I don't know any if you did it you should be really proud that you have helped save a little animal so that's my sweet all right well I don't know how I'm going to follow that. Well, you could sponsor an animal, Laura. I do. I buy tickets in the RSPCA ticket thingy every month.

But anyway. Okay, so my suck for the week is my children. No, it's not my children. I love them very much. No. Fucking love my life. No, it's not my kids. But it is the fact that they keep on waking up at 4 a.m.

I'd like that to stop. It's been every day this week. That's fair. 4 a.m. And they kind of tag team. One night, she'll sleep until 7 the next morning. But don't worry. Like Lola will be up at 4 a.m. just to really make sure that no one gets to sleep.

So Matt and I have been alternating. This morning was his wake up. He got up at 4 a.m. Yesterday I got up at 4 a.m. Yeah, it's not cute. It's annoying. No, and I feel like you know that that's going to be the next 20 years. I don't know.

I feel like everything's a phase. Every parent lives with that as their mantra. This is just a phase. Everything's a phase. Yeah, it's just that one phase comes after the other. It's a perpetual phase. Yeah, until they leave home. And then that's still a phase because they just want money.

but anyway so that's where we're at this week I'm sure we'll be somewhere else in the parenting journey next week so that is my suck my sweet for the week I've had a couple of sweets but my big sweet for the week last week was that we did the very last episode of Batchette Uncut we got through it it was actually so hard to get those episodes done this time around it was a lot easier doing Batch Uncut during lockdown when we had nowhere to go and just trying to get through the episodes and bring them was it was a really mammoth effort from Matt and I and I'm very very proud that we got it done but also we had so much fun doing it so it was great their last episode was really enjoyable also i think because they were dropping episodes like they were doubling up episodes which

essentially is twice the work for you yeah one night when you said one episode comes out two comes out you've still got to watch those you've still got to script them you've still got to record you've still got to edit like that's a it's a bloody big job but i know the people loved it and also if you listen to the last episode that came out on saturday matt wanted to cut corners and just do a recap of the recap, but we persevered. We did it, and it was a great episode, so I hope you guys have gotten how to listen. That is it, guys, from us.

Please, if you haven't left us a sneaky little review or five stars or subscribed, please do that. We'll love you forever. Keep the Accidentally Unfiltereds coming in, the questions for Ask Uncut coming in. Everything can come in to our Instagram Live Uncut podcast. Just make sure you put the heading at the top. And remember to tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog,

tell your friends, and share the love because we love love. We'll be right back.