Life Uncut - We Have Some Very Big News… & The YSL Hamper That Broke A Marriage

Episode Date: July 21, 2026

Hey Lifers! We are finally all back in one room after weeks of holiday mode, sinus infections and very aggressive Do Not Disturb settings, and there is a LOT to get through. First up, Laura's just landed back from Bali with a toddler who went down like a sack of gastro, and we catch up on everything we’ve missed while everyone was mixing and matching holidays. Then it's time to address the elephant in the pants: the Facebook discussion group came for Britt after last week's offcuts episode, and she is here to defend her holiday underwear rotation once and for all. Then we sit down for a very emotional conversation. A huge change is coming for the Life Uncut team, and there isn't a dry eye in the room. After that we unpack whether being called "lovely" or "hun" by customer service is actually patronising, or are we all just a bit too sensitive? And then, the story the whole internet is talking about. A husband wins a luxury YSL hamper at a work lunch, gives it straight to a female coworker in front of everyone, and now the internet has crowned it "the betrayal of consideration." We unpack why this one viral post has struck such a nerve with women everywhere!   TIMESTAMPS 0:00 — Intro: back from holiday mode, sinus infections and Bali gastro 5:29 — Britt's underwear scandal explained 11:19 — Should the Facebook group nicknames stay or go? 13:53 — The big announcement: a huge change for the Life Uncut team 25:05 — "Hey lovely" vs "hey babe.” Is a pet name patronising? 35:56 — YSL-gate: the hamper that's "destroyed a marriage" 48:04 — Suck and Sweet   Keep your questions coming! Slide into the Life Uncut DMs at @lifeuncutpodcast on Instagram You can watch us on Youtube Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Hosted by Britt Hockley & Laura Byrne Produced by Keeshia Pettit Video Produced by Vanessa Beckford & Lachy Pugsley Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura. I'm Brittany and welcome back. I mean I know you guys are already back but I'm back. Hi. The last month to six weeks has been a bit of a you and me, me and Keisha, Keisha and Laura. We've been mixing matching while we were on holiday and what we mean by that is i milked every last drop out of that holiday i was like you guys went back to work and there was so many messages happening in the group chat and i was like do not disturb laura was like i'm not gonna reply to the same amount as what i normally do i was about to say you're on do not disturb the whole year we can never get a hold of you yeah but it's just that's my energy for 2026 mute that's my energy anxiety

and mute. Works well when your job is podcasting. Love that. I'm very rarely mute. I just mute everyone else only because it's the only way I deal with my anxiety. So like, you know, it's a full circle picture. That's my technique too. Head in the sand. Like if I didn't read it or open the message, it never happened. Or this is my, does anyone else do this? I sometimes open messages on aeroplane mode so that people can't see that I've read them. And then I turn it off aeroplane mode. I don't know if it works. I've never tested it. I'm pretty sure I remember testing that and it doesn't work it's like when everyone thought you could put your instagram messages on unread and you'd think that it meant the other person didn't know you'd opened it but

it just is unread for you shame it's giving that shame why don't you just turn off red receipts oh my god that is so funny that would be far too simple that feels like admin no do you know why it's too long to find where to do that because i don't know how to but also because the people who know i have read receipts or read receipts will then question why i've turned it off right like matt will be like why'd you turn that off i think they also question why you don't write back so it's the same thing like why is lauren not messaging me back can i say i know we make jokes and this is okay so you guys have already caught up if you've been listening to the pod keish and brit were on last week i've got some fucking things to talk to you about from that episode

because i listened and i have some questions brand but i'm glad you brought that up because i also would like to address the elephant in the pants but i've just come back from holidays uh if you follow on socials been in bali with the kids had school holidays back to back and we came back from school well we came back from like our trip to poppy having the most intense gastro which it only takes down babies and old people like everyone in the middle was fine but Ellie went down like a sack of I was about to say sack of shit but literally she went down like a sack of diarrhea like a sack of diarrhea poor Poppy was wiped out and then the rest of us because we've got guts of steel from the two other kids we were

all perfectly fine and then somewhere in the last week I've just gotten a sinus infection and the only thing that's been getting me out of bed every day is like taking you know the over-the-counter Sudafed oh yeah sorry Laura came in and she literally put this thing up her nose and she's like it was like a truffle pig and i was like would you take a breath mate it's called nasal spraying no but it's because we're in the middle of a meeting and you're so loud you are like a truffle pig we're all in this meeting seven of us and lauren's like it was giving robbie williams having that mint fall out of his nose i mean to imagine it's like i've been looking for that mint for weeks to be fair okay so oh that's where that went so so wait for it this is my discovery that

I had yesterday so once again and I know I talk about this on and off but this year for some reason my anxiety has not been good and then the last few days well today's announcement's going to help you oh yeah we've got some stuff guys it's a big episode but let me get through this first bit first okay so the last couple of days I've had really bad anxiety I was in bed last night and I was like babe I don't know I don't know what's wrong with me because I go through these waves I was like but right now it's peak high again and I was like maybe it's because I'm going back to work tomorrow and he was like babe it's because you've been having pseudoephedrine every day to get out of bed and I read the instructions and like you know that it's the

over-the-counter one they have to show your license and that stuff slaps and that's why you have to show your license because it's really bad for you it also says take max two puffs Laura's like she's like what's wrong with me she's like my anxiety's through the roof anyway guys yeah she's got a collapsed septum I'm weaning myself off the pseudoephedrine and maybe I'll feel better oh great so now we get the withdrawals we get withdrawal Laura anyway it's very good to be back I've missed you guys I did think it was funny I we did still communicate when we're all on holidays right and there was this one message from I had sent a message from where I was and I was like you know this is what we're doing today and I was at this beautiful beach in Crete and I was on a

phone and Laura said, wow, our holidays are very different. She was at a foam pool party with like 80 children. And I loved every second of the hand, foot and mouth that was probably coming for my family. Because you're on Sudafed. I was going to say, you wonder where the gas show came from? You wonder why I'm on Sudafed. Yes, exactly.

Anyway. Okay. So one thing that has caused a little bit of a stir in the Facebook discussion group. I would go so far as to say I have ruckus. It's something that you said on the episode that I wasn't on, Britt. And Keish, you and Britt had a bit of a rogue conversation around clothes and reusing clothes. So if you missed it, I'm not going to retell the story.

We're going to put a little whoosh and we're going to put it in here because I think you need to listen to it firsthand. No, you don't need to because. You do because I listened to it firsthand this morning. So if you missed it, you need to revisit the joy. Because you've all taken it out of context. Whoosh. I would like a moment.

The huff plays. I would like a moment, if I may. Whoosh. put it in Keisha I would like a moment to talk this through and defend myself but I reckon a lot of people do what I do I think they don't plan it I mean maybe they don't sleep in their clothes I think that's fine I think the only thing that I would really draw a hard boundary on their underwear yeah but I am not opposed to the inside out fuck off yeah I've done it lots of times I actually do it on holiday but why so when I'm on holiday I never it's

do you know what I've got so many but you're not poor no I can't afford underwear but I don't even Ben the other day said to me he's like tell me your bra size and your undie size he's like I'm gonna go buy you stuff he's like you've since I've known you you've two bras I just alternate between two bras they're like brown and gross but I just feel like if it ain't broke don't fix it I on holiday never seem to pack enough undies and I just went away for on a holiday with Ben for four weeks like a full month and I didn't pack enough and sometimes like I will wash undies in the shower but if you're not going to be actually washing in a washing machine every pair of undies can get multiple days because you turn it inside out to the clean side for a day

you can I don't care what anyone says absolutely not they're absolutely not sorry I don't wear undies with my fucking body suits and I that's you you have it you only wear the body suit once yeah but you raw dog it you do not turn your underwear you said multiple days out of a pair of underwear I have never this has changed my whole view of you plural keisha more than one so just two I'm not wearing them for a week I said multiple days which I meant but to clarify I'm going to tell you what this means is and also this isn't like I don't live my life like this right I don't just wake up and choose to pick undies off of the floor they're like week old and be like, I'm going to wear those. When I'm on holiday, and I want to stress this by saying,

and I wasn't clear, I went on a three year holiday. I went around the world for three years backpacking with my sister. So if I go to bed, if I'm on a holiday and it's a long one like that, and I have gone to bed and I put my undies on at midnight, 11, 10, because I go to bed very late and I wake up in the morning and I have the discovery, shit, we haven't been to a laundromat in a while and I'm on my last pair am I inclined to turn them inside out sorry there's so much I love that now we have a detailed explanation of what you meant I understand I understand why this caused a stir in the Facebook group oh whatever I also understand I was at dinner and two of my friends were like I'm sorry I just need to talk about Britain or underwear and I was like

sorry let me go back and listen to the episode and then I had this moment where I was like oh for god's sakes guys like why wasn't I there because I would have told you that that was a terrible decision to discuss I was like of all the things you want people to know I feel like I did reflect that perspective and that you know bullshit Keisha goes I'm putting this on socials and I said no you're not Keisha wanted to put it on socials I really thought there'd be high engagement and there was and there was you all felt a lot about it and I want to say like Brit I mean this with all the love in the world this is coming from the woman who's talked about her mountain of debt and her multiple orgasms in the past episode like it's okay for us to have some

secrets I do you know what the funny thing is I genuinely mean this I am perplexed at the level of hate that discussed the fact that I don't see it as shameful I just don't I grew up as somebody there's no dignity left no do you know why because I think if you think that that's the grossest thing about me you don't know me some support though these are some of my favorite comments in support of you the majority were the opposite but better than wearing them the same way i suppose yes you'd get some good money for them 100 double wear imagine what that'd sell for and another one it's really good that ben said he's buying her some more i said on the last step it's just one of those things about me like i don't care about fancy bras and underwears if i find

something that fits me, I stick to it. Or it sticks to you. I would like to say something else about the Facebook discussion group that's been happening recently. And I am now unsure about what I want to do. So recently we spoke about the fact that everyone has nicknames in there now. So no one who is contributing and the Facebook discussion group, it's elite, it's lit. There are so many discussions that are happening in there. If you are not in our Life Uncut discussion group, go and find it. But the network is very wide. There's even people in there that actually don't understand that it's a podcast discussion group and they'll be like who's that person I'm like she hosts the podcast of the group that you're a part of this weekend I went up to Fort

Macquarie to see my family and I met a lovely lifer who stopped me and we chatted and she took photos it was great and she posted a really nice post about the meeting in the discussion group and the first comment was like sorry am I supposed to know who this is so I was like who's Britt and I was like oh I think the question is who are you that is literally my case in point because I've seen quite a few of them but the thing is at the start I was like I think we need to get rid of the nicknames because it stops people from having any inhibitions around how they post in there or what they write because there's no accountability there's no accountability because you can write whatever you want because you know pineapple 243 is not going to know that

rodent 764 wrote that right like they're not going to know who the person is and I bet you so many people wouldn't have come for me in my underwear if they had to put their real name yeah I mean like look just to remind you all we can see who you are when you post your name is visible to us as admins however the content that is being posted within that group now is the most unhinged zany as fuck like you all have the weirdest shit going on in your lives and it's just gone from being like palatable and enjoyable to being my favorite tv show to watch like that's where we're at with the Facebook discussion group now I am like every time something gets posted I'm like you're all cooked thank you my people come to me I feel like I just want to be part

of this cult and then I'm like oh I'm the leader and they're like who's the leader do you know sometimes I think it's funny like occasionally you guys write some really mean stuff about us and I always like you're all entitled to your opinion but sometimes I look at and I'm like you guys know we're in here right like you know that this is our Facebook group and you know like we're always lurking we are there and sometimes I read the stuff and I'm like that's actually really me sometimes I go into their Facebook profiles and I'm like where do you work totally I'm like you know this is our home like it's literally like coming into our house throwing a fart bomb and running out I'm fine with it I mean maybe nothing really upsets

me anymore. I'm so high on pseudoephedrine. I was upset about the undies. I won't be shamed in my own group. Look, I know we laugh and we laugh and we laugh and look, we'll continue to laugh because that is what we do on this podcast. We deal with trauma by laughing at it. And we have a very big thing that we need to talk about on this episode. This is something that we didn't want to speak about until we were all together. So yeah, and now it's arrived and we're all together and we're going to hold hands and sing Kumbaya and cry. It's something we've been sitting on for a little bit because we were on holidays and we were trying to figure out the best way to manage it something we never thought we would say here I'm gonna cry I know it's it's a day we I'm

gonna cry too it's a no actually it's a day we never thought would come but it's here we fired Keisha okay we didn't we didn't I say we deal with trauma by laughing Keish our beautiful incredible Keisha who is part of the heart and soul of this podcast is leaving life uncut because she I know it's different when it's on record because she look I mean I want to let you speak for all of the things that you want to say. And we love you so much. We love everything you've contributed in the past five years to this podcast.

Like it is not what it is without you. And it isn't too late to change your mind. Look, there was one comment in the Facebook group from Porcupine865 that just pushed me over the edge. I thought that's the final straw. The thing is, and I mean, you know, we are family here and we've all been working together for so long. But the thing is, we are one, even though the podcast does relatively well in the rankers,

we are one small podcast. Like we are one and we live and breathe what Life Uncut is. We're a family. Yeah. And Keish has been at the top of what this podcast can offer and what it is for, for as long as we've had employees, she was our first employee and there is no further to go in terms of career progression or in terms of like next steps. and we only want what's best for you and we only want you to continue to oh i'm so sorry that i

cry we only want you to continue to develop your skills and to like do well not too well to do what makes you happy just grow a little bit and just to be incredible like we really want what's best for you i mean we're devastated for us and that chair will be a very hard chair to feel but we yeah do you know why it'll be hard because i screwed on the legs really really well because I've had many different jobs here but yeah I mean I met you guys five and a half years ago and I'm gonna try and like pull it together because I thought that next week would be like the emotional one I thought that surprise knowing all of us like I know that the only way we deal with anything is by taking the piss and cracking jokes and I would have it no other way because

it's the only way that I am comfortable in discomfort but you know I was thinking about it last night I was in the shower and I was like wow I've actually the same amount of time that you're at high school is the same amount of time that I've been here in Life Uncut and and like not only professionally but so personally like I genuinely did you leave in year 10 no five and a half years that's like your high school hang on no if you're six seven eight nine ten you start high school in year six it's six years yeah year 12 finishes like okay sorry I can't count that's rough okay shockingly our executive producer is right I didn't do well of high school no I just Laura's not a numbers girl Laura was wagging all the times smoking weed

down the back lawn doing pseudo effigy she had a lot of signers problems in high school okay and and yeah I genuinely hand on my heart I think I would not be the person that I am in so many ways like I think about who I was when I met you and my god that girl was just a mess personally and professionally we like to take the wounded birds i feel as though you guys kind of put me back together as a person and and we have had some of the funniest moments of my entire life like the biggest laughs some of the biggest tears and like i know for a lot of podcasting teams i think front facing they talk about the friendships that exist behind the mic and for some of them i'm sure that they are completely genuine and very real but some of them and this

is also going back to me working in radio beforehand some of them are kind of hammed up because of the optics that it gives and I feel as though this dynamic in this relationship is almost reversed in that yeah we are so much closer than what I think most people may assume of people who work together and you guys have been best friends bosses the closest thing I've ever had to sisters and yeah like it's I know that even me saying this I'm like what the fuck am I doing like rewind it's really not too late but I do feel as though I'm starting to kind of enter like a different chapter of my life a much more settled um like responsible chapter and yeah it's a really hard decision to make but I also did make a list of things that when I am demoted or demoting myself

from colleague and friend to just friend I actually wrote a list of demands that I have for both of you and I would like for you to both take them oh wow she's leaving and demanding things like I'd like to continue to earn my salary Brit we still need to celebrate our birthday together absolutely it's the 21st of August for anyone who's wondering we can go to an escape room again and just we'll just leave Keisha in there we won't let her escape I would still like to be a hand-me-down recipient Laura I know that Claire who's also our other employee who's listening into this she's about to burst into the room and be like you've lost rank it's now claire 20 i would still like to be sent memes and reels of anything you find funny or gossipy

about a rogue international celebrity to our group chat that had to be labeled the three of us keisha send it to this one because i kept sending it to random people by accident we've all been there laura i will still need a tony may discount code to share with people brit i would still like to remain your in case of emergency person and have semi-regular contact with your parents yeah you are my only other friend so you are my in case of emergency I would still like to have two-thirds of my text ignored by you Laura I can guarantee that will happen she doesn't make promises but that one please know that I'll do it with love I'll actually probably reply to you more because I have to try harder now I would still like to be considered as a plus one to anything that you're

invited to I would still like to be able to spend 17 hours in your presence and not feel like I have to leave your freezing cold lounge room i would still like to be referred to as arnie quiche by marley may and lola and poppy by the time that she can speak and this is the most important i still need to be delilah's number one away game guardian i have a demand i would like you to email me without it being an invoice thank you quiche you will i mean and i i do think it's really important and i'm sure you guys sorry do you guys agree to the demand oh yeah all of that was like just normal expectations I was like I don't even know why we're discussing this it's all stock standard Keisha 20 and I want to reiterate something you just said and it's um the friendship

here goes so much deeper than the podcast and I think that's what made the podcast so good as well it's because we aren't just three people that work together we have three very close friends and that's not going to change and selfishly we're devastated like the hole that you will leave in our hearts and in that chair because you've sat in it for so long is huge and we will feel it but it won't be easy we want just the best for you and whatever's going to make you happy and we totally understand that it's time for you to spread your wings and have a different adventure and you know that we will always support you no matter what and nothing's going to change with the friendship and whenever you come crawling back we'll have you but like lastly and I like

I'm not much of a sentimental but I am so so beyond fucking grateful to both of you for literally everything if I was to list everything we would be here until next Wednesday which is probably going to be the last time that you know my voice is here I'm so proud of what we have made together I'm so grateful for the opportunities that you guys have provided me and yeah it's been one of the most shifting experiences that I'll ever go through in my life well it's now an insensitive time to say I'm also starting a business but we still promote it Brittany 20 Keisha 15 25 we love you Kate I love you both and the whole team like Ness and Lockie and Claire and Sherry I'm so grateful to every single person who's a part of this team

they are just the fucking best you guys have got the creme de la creme I want to say you know we're talking about this as though like you're never coming back and I know we joke we're going to hogtie you and put you in our boot if you don't see Keisha again you know where she is don't look in our cars New South Wales police no but what I want to say is it's like we talked about how we were going to have this conversation because like you know not only are you important to us but you're important to our lifers you're important to everyone who's part of this community Pineapple 747 loves you yeah and all the rest of them but also you know it's funny when you come from the world of audio because we've seen how radio does goodbyes and it's the most like severe and unkind

like you're there and then all of a sudden you're gone and you get this one goodbye like you know I was literally made redundant on my birthday in stage four lockdown of a pandemic that screams radio and they were like you can have a support person but it will have to be someone who is able to be in the building which is only my content director that's how radio does things yeah it's savage it's savage that's probably the best description for it and like you know Keisha's still on the episodes this week we're gonna talk about it again on Monday we're gonna talk about it again next week like this will be a week of tears it'll be and as we go on that's our theme song so yeah look this is not going to be a one and done conversation it is

a conversation that will happen again and maybe each time we have it we will cry less so yeah guys that's the very big news that we wanted to share and we didn't want to share it sorry that's the very big news that we needed to share with you but also I'm glad that we didn't just dangle a carrot like we did with Brit's big news last year this is actual big news it's real big news but also like you know and Keisha you're like we said you not being here will be incredibly felt the podcast goes on unfortunately it goes on it goes on and like you know as much as there is big changes there are other big changes that are coming as well and yeah it'll be a big year for Life Uncut yeah and a big year for Keisha and a big year for us as friends yeah because I have

to reply to the group chat messages also Laura's gonna have to put in so much more effort to meet and obviously to your last point you will always be Delilah's godmother thank you legal guardian is what I would like oh whatever you if anything happens to you I need to see the will can you also be my children's legal guardian let's not change I do like your kids you don't trust me absolutely not I'll just put their undies on the other way but very lastly I just also want to say that the community of life uncut far out I've never felt more validated I've never had more laughs I've never internet met like I call them internet friends because I've never felt so connected to people that like I don't

actually know in person and when you know when we do get the chance to meet people in person I actually met someone on the weekend and she saw Bonnie and she was like oh Keisha I'm listening to Life Uncut right now I met her dog honey like those moments and just the support that I feel like I've had from people has been one of the most validating and reassuring things that I've ever gone through. Like, I just feel as though you've created and cultivated such a special and beautiful, like-minded group of people that come from all over and they do so much for each other. Like you guys actually have an episode coming up that I've already edited that is one of the most phenomenal stories to ever exist to come out of that Facebook group. You'll know

exactly when it drops what I'm talking about. It is just such a special and unique place. And yeah, I'm just super grateful. And I will still be in the Facebook group if you don't kick me out. Oh, my God. We're going to have to block her. No, I'm joking. Wait, she's going to come in as Hedgehog98. We'll know it's you, Keisha.

The show must go on, so let's deliver thy content. And there is something else that happened in the Facebook group this week that we must talk about. It really is a bit anticlimactic after that. But anyway, we digress. This came from GoldTangerine2485. I wish we were joking. So do I.

This was a post in the Facebook group that got a lot of people talking and I was surprised, genuinely surprised by how angered some people were around this. And it's got to do with customer service and pet names or names of endearment, terms of endearment. It said this, I bought a product from a small activewear brand and it didn't fit the advertised description. So I've been emailing them to try to resolve the issue. Instead of addressing me by my name, which is on every single email, they keep calling me lovely or angel. Is this a younger generation thing? I find it absolutely infuriating. Does it make anyone else mad or is it just me and my perihormones? It doesn't help that they are also being super unhelpful. Maybe if they were actually being nice

and I wouldn't mind the pet names. Now, the reason I want to talk about this is because the response was so incredibly one-sided. Like I'm talking 99% of people in that comment thread were like, It is the most disrespectful. It is so patronizing. And I read this and I had a moment where I was like, oh, well, shit. Oh, fuck. It had your name all over it. I am very sorry for anyone who has ever emailed Tony May because I am a terms of endearment gal and I am not a young person. I am a millennial. Laura commented back on the thread and she was like, hun, I hear you. But I love, I don't know why. And I don't find it offensive. Like if someone calls me darling or someone calls me lovely or anything I never find it offensive I like it but you know

what I think it does and this is why people get upset about it more so than their patronizing thing I think it's because people think that someone is trying to manufacture closeness and that closeness doesn't exist Laura uses a lot of different terms of endearment you use hun a lot lovely lovely is probably the only one I will do I will use and I don't use it for everyone and I pick the times I use it and I say that because I agree with the majority and I think it's really demeaning to anyone that is older than you I think it's a level it takes away a level of respect and I say that because I remember having these conversations with my mum growing up and I remember my mum saying it these young kids were coming in and saying to her hey babe hey hon like

whatever and mum I just remember her saying I hate it I feel like it is taking away a level of respect from an elder and and mom's not that kind of a person and she's just like I just hate when people throw that term at me especially when your colleagues or co-workers and it's somebody that might be way younger saying that so I understand it so I use it very sporadically with my close friends I will say like hey love hey angel whatever like if it's somebody on my level somebody I know well but I won't write an email I'm not going to write a business email to somebody like I wouldn't personally probably be a brand that would be writing to a customer complaining saying hey babe if I wasn't especially if I wasn't delivering what they needed do you know what I

agree with you and I think that there are some terms like I would never write hey babe for example there are some words that are just a note and I would never write hey hun to a customer I think lovely is the only one that I would use angel even like all of those other ones to me I'm like oh instant cringe some reason lovely just kind of gets a bit of a pass basket I have a bigger question for you though more so beyond just the correspondence in email because I think that you know, I guess like a lot of people do it. A lot of people don't, a lot of people have strong feelings about it. What about brands that have a brand identity and a persona where it's part of their character? It's part of their personality to use endearing names. So like, for example,

I'm going to think, I don't actually know if this is true, but I think go-to is one that might come to mind where maybe they would call a customer cutie. For example, I'm not saying they do that. I don't have the examples, but I've definitely been in brand worlds where like, it's like, hey cutie get 20% off this or hey whatever might be the term of endearment it's because it's not a personal conversation that conversation is happening with an entire customer database instead of just saying hi you're part of our loyalty program I don't know I wonder if does that have as much impact on people do people feel as like instantly offended is it still trying to manufacture a sense of closeness that doesn't exist or is it a brand having an identity that

is I guess all encompassing of a tone of voice of a playful style of a communication style I find it insincere like I find it to be kind of like we're besties and we know each other and I don't like it well because they you don't know them and they know you don't know them yeah so I do agree with the whole like there is a rank of what would piss me off more than others and lovely is at the lovely is at the least pissy off the end but I think it's because I find the insincerity of it like off-putting but I also find it very different if it is an automatic response an automatic reply a newsletter something that's going out to the masses and it's not a one-on-one specific conversation if I was a disgruntled customer and I was trying to communicate with

a brand and say like can I get this refund where how long is this happening they weren't doing it and they were still saying hey lovely hope you've been well so on it like we are chasing that thanks cutie I'd be like fuck off and send me my yeah just give me my because I think it's a I think it's what they're trying to do is just soften the blow if they're super nice to you it's almost like a compliment sandwich like they start it with that they deliver the bad news and then like thanks lovely like chat soon well I also think that that's where it becomes even more patronizing so like if I've asked for something and like like you said maybe I'm unhappy with the service something's broken I need something fixed and they're not meeting my needs but yeah they're

calling me something I can understand so that's why I wonder whether it is also a context situation because like like she said in this they're being really unhelpful and if they were being helpful maybe I wouldn't mind the pet name so much if I was contacting a company and I was like hey this has happened and whoever the customer service person was was like hey lovely I am so incredibly sorry that this you've experienced this and they bent over backwards to meet my needs I wouldn't feel as patronized. I would see that as actually that person's genuinely lovely nature and that's how they communicate. I don't know. I feel slightly differently about pet names and it's obviously because I use them. I have never been offended when someone's used them to me. I don't

find them offensive to use myself. But when I read through this thread, I was like, oh, maybe I am the numero uno in this one and I am the minority. I would say you feel like that because from the day I've met you, you have used them. So it is a cool part of your identity and how you communicate. for me it's more about the age than it is about the situation so as much as I just touched on that I think it's situational with the newsletters or if it's personal I still stand by that but I do think it's more age related and I say that because when you think about it as you grow up when you're a child a small child your elders your parents your aunties your uncles whoever they say things like hey sweetheart hey darling like hey my love hey angel like you talk to your

youngers in that way and I think when somebody younger says it to you so for me personally if an older if I'm at a store buying something and there is an older lady that is serving me and she says have a good day sweetheart or thing how are you sweetheart it doesn't touch the sides if I went to a store and a 21 year old called me sweetheart it would rub me the wrong way great the Botox is working yes personally I'd be like I am the same as you firstly thank you and I cannot put my finger on why I don't like being addressed like that by somebody that is much younger than me and so I for me personally it's very much an age-related thing I think it's interesting what you said about them trying to create like a brand identity and it's like a part

of the identity though I actually had an experience uh 12 days ago my email I've just searched it because I remember thinking wow what a good customer service email response so it's a small business in Australia they do dog products and there was just something wrong with my order and I emailed them and they were so firstly they've addressed hello Keisha in response which I like but this is what they said at the end have a pawsome day anything else just bark happy to help best woofs and I thought that that was so cute like there's still that's brand identity yes exactly there's still brand identity in their response also the response was very helpful and it was you know it wasn't like they were trying to soften some blow but I think that that's a good

way to still have brand identity in your response without it being patronizing or making someone feel as though they're feigning like a closeness with you? Look, I think that there are levels to what people might deem offensive or inoffensive. Like I said, everyone feels differently about this, but I wonder whether if you're a brand or if you're in a situation where you're communicating people, is it worth taking the risk? Because that's been my lesson in all this. And I'm quite happy to be wrong, but I was like, I mean, I'm still going to call people who are within my world hot and lovely but I was like what are your newsletters do you know off the top of your head like our newsletters are automated so anyone who's signed up to the newsletter uses their name

because obviously like you know normal newsletters have the function where you can put the hyperlink in and so it'll pull from your database and it will update and populate their name the only thing we call our people in our rewards program are jewelry lovers so like which is part of the rewards program name so it'll be like hey jewelry lovers if it's you know communicating with a group of people but that in itself like that's not a term of endearment i'm not like hey cheery lover but that's the thing right hello that's the thing it's a collective you're addressing a collective of people so the babes and the huns and the whatever when it's en masse is fine when it's a one-on-one in a store or an email it hits different i've got my

tony may one here hello keisha we hope you're loving your tony may jewels win a 500 gift card okay. She's like, has that expired yet? I thought it was food for thought. And like, you know, the more I look through my emails, the more that I see other people who do it and don't do it. I also do think it's industry specific. I think that if you're working in the world of retail, fashion, beauty, people are far more inclined, female dominated industries are far more inclined to have these types of terms of endearments rather than if you're a lawyer or a doctor, or like, imagine if you're going to your GP and she's like, hi, honey, you've got chlamydia like you know you've got the clap you would be a little bit more like that was weird

but that definitely suffers a blow when you're gonna start hey cutie you've got chlamydia but we've got you sweetheart it's just one pill apparently and you'll be sweet lovely have a great day woof cutie have a pawsome day win a $500 gift card and win a $500 gift card on your way out I would hope that at this point of the internet from this week that you've all heard about the great YSL hamper that has destroyed a marriage. YSL gate. YSL gate. If you haven't heard about it, it is really bizarre to me how viral this situation within this relationship has gone. And I want to read it out to you so that I'm not missing anything. And I want to unpack some of the responses of this and kind of get to the why has this resonated with so many

women around the world. It all started with a YSL hamper, the YSL makeup prize that might break a marriage. This is what was posted. Last night, my marriage was shaken over a makeup kit, but anyone looking from the outside will call me crazy. My husband came home from his company luncheon radiant. It was an employee's only lunch, and he was drawn as the winner of a super premium skincare and makeup kit, expensive and complete, you know, the kind of treat that any woman would love to get. But what did he do? He simply looked to the side and handed the entire prize over to a female co-worker it didn't stop there he told me this laughing he was proud of his generosity to top it all off the company took a photo of the two of them together smiling with the gift and they

posted it on their official profile for everyone to see the quote-unquote perfect husband making another woman's day while he was posing for the photo and playing the gentleman i was at home i was taking care of our son cleaning the house preparing his dinner exhausted my eyes filled with tears instantly. The feeling of being undervalued was so violent it took my breath away. Not for one second did I cross his mind. The existence of his own wife was completely erased at that event. He preferred the smile and the gratitude of a co-worker over mine. He preferred the social applause of being the nice guy. When I confronted him, the worst part came. He called me dramatic and crazy. He said it would look bad for a man to accept makeup in front of everyone

and that he couldn't refuse the moment in other words his ego and what others would think mattered more than my feelings now the photo is out there on the internet everyone is praising his kindness while i'm here swallowing my tears and my rage that is eating me up inside he says it's just silly jealousy but to me it was a betrayal of consideration i'm feeling awful guilty for feeling so much anger but i just can't forget that photo the betrayal of consideration line is such a powerful line and I think it's the key line in this whole thing because the onslaught of comments off the back of this and it's been very divisive a lot of people are in support of her and say absolutely I can see where you're coming from and a lot of people are saying get over it it's some

makeup like he did the right thing in the moment this is the icing on the cake this is not the first time she is feeling underappreciated I think it's just the thing that's tipped her over the edge and his response for me in both aspects is really telling his response at the start where he said oh I genuinely didn't think about it and I thought in that moment it would be rude if I didn't give it to a woman I believe that I absolutely believe there was nothing malicious in it but that's the problem it's because he's not thinking about it I truly believe he was like oh my god everyone at work is looking at me with a bag of makeup and there's a woman next to me who probably deserves it I will give it to her that's the problem the problem is his wife is at home

being like sorry what am I a ham sandwich I agree and I think that two things can be true at the same time one thing that I did consider is that he is not to know how valuable the hamper is and I think that that does have an impact because if it was product that you didn't want or it was like some shitty bath bombs and your husband brought it home you might be like oh great whatever I think it is the significance of the value of the hamper and missing out on that so there is a little bit of it that I can go I don't think that that's interesting well I think that the value of it is significant I think that there is if it was something that seemed insignificant to her she may not have felt as strongly about it but the big thing that I come back to and I think the biggest

question I asked when I saw this and I have seen this so many times like why a cell has responded to this they've created skits about this there is really the amount of commentary around this is insane online at the moment it may be my algorithm I won't lie it is but it is everywhere but it's everywhere and I think it's because collectively it taps into this feeling of being undervalued and of feeling invisible within your relationship and it's something that so many women speak about when you are the one that's at home taking the mental load caring for the kids like she said cooking dinner cleaning and to not even be thought of to not have entered your partner's brain for one millisecond that maybe this is something that would make them feel good or you

feel good as a partner that sense of just any consideration you know I know you said it briefly but I love that terminology. The betrayal of consideration is such an eloquent way of putting the words together for something that I think a lot of people in relationships and especially a lot of women feel. And that's why I think that as much as the price value of the hamper cuts deeper, I don't think it's the primary source of her feelings of underappreciated. It's just like, and one of the comments that's sort of, I don't know, become one of the main comments on this thread is one woman talking about like a bag of onions. And she's like, this is not a quote but she's the the sentiment is I could be allergic and detest onions if my

husband wins a bag of onions bring him home bring him home to me and I'll decide if we give him to someone to cook or you know it's the idea of the fact that you get given something it's irrelevant of what it was like you won a huge prize that could be used and you've chosen to give it to someone else I think another layer of it is the onion lamp yes onions have layers I think that it's to do with and I'm not sure I'm getting the right words for this but the fact that he wanted to look like a really generous good guy in front of his work people totally and that was more important to him you know I think it's kind of representative of that partner who wants to look like they are something to the outside world when actually in at home and in private they're

something else and I think that there's such a frustration especially when men perform being a good guy or being a good colleague or you know doing a nice thing but then behind the scenes you know we can tell by what she's written that she feels underappreciated it kind of alludes to the fact that he's not being a particularly great partner at home or maybe a father to their kid I think it's that disparity between like you pretend that you're one thing to the external when actually internally you're something much much worse yeah and I think that that's something like the optics is such an interesting part of the conversation because there are so many people who present outwardly this is who I am I'm a and I don't want to just make this gendered and just

shit on men that's not but I'm obviously using this an example because that is what this example is like I'm a great dad and like I'm you know I have this family and I have this wife and I have like the fucking picket fence on the hill but really behind closed doors you have an unsatisfied relationship or an unsatisfied wife who's not feeling valued who's not feeling loved but the optics of what you have is more important than what's actually happening within you know your own house and I read this and partly it was the gaslighting of her feelings her explaining how she felt and instead of him going holy shit I you know what you're right you're right I didn't consider you and I'm so sorry and I'm so sorry that that made you feel like that it was not my

intention instead of that being his response his response being to call her silly to say that she's just being jealous minimizes any feelings that one might have and I think that when I read it I felt so sorry for her that she's in a relationship where she feels so devalued and that's what I think overarchingly most women felt. And that's why it's had this viral spread. It actually made me think this is just not the same, but the same. The funniest story when I was younger and I was in my relationship, I was with him for eight years. Anyone from my hometown or anyone that knows me knows who this is. Heart of gold, which is the problem. I remember we were living together and I remember coming home one day and we're talking about dinner and we're like, I said,

let's have a barbecue. And he said, oh, we can't. And I said, why? And he said, we don't have a barbecue and I said we had a barbecue this morning I was like where did that go he said oh such and such came over and he made a comment that he didn't have a barbecue and I said so what happened to our barbecue he's like well I felt bad for him so I gave it to him and I said oh it wasn't a girl that came over and said I really need a barbecue and he's like take Brittany's I said sorry so now he has a barbecue but we don't have one have I got that right he's like yes maybe because you guys weren't using it very often it just made me think we use it all the time it just made me think and I'm not defending this guy I think he's a twat I would understand him a tiny bit more if

his response wasn't a gaslighter and if his response was I'm fuck I'm so sorry like what was I thinking if that was his response I'd almost get it because in that moment when all the eyes are on you and you're like oh my god what am I gonna do with this do you want it Cheryl whatever I would almost say okay I get it make it up to her but that's not what it was he then just like went to town and made her feel guilty and yeah minimized her feelings didn't validate anything and I understand it she obviously feels like this her entire life and I think it's a conversation that most women are having and feeling in their everyday life every day the last thing that I question about this is that I saw a comment and again I'm paraphrasing it was basically along

the lines of like what he did was bad but you airing this publicly is so much worse the original post from what I could see nothing remains private because how will we have content was deleted so i mean i am imagining that something happened in her household where he was like what the fuck you need to take that down but you know the internet remembers and it had already been screenshot do you think that him doing the whole makeup gifting to the work wife is worse than her airing it publicly i think unfortunately there is no way that she was ever going to know that her posting that in a forum somewhere was going to get the legs that it did like imagine someone imagine one of our lifers posting something in the facebook discussion group and people resonating

with the plight of it so much that it then makes its way onto reddit and then from reddit it makes its way onto blah blah blah onto you know this is why we need the nicknames and then makes its way onto you know our life uncut podcast like the reality is is that you know you put things out onto the internet sometimes because you're so desperate for a community or you're so desperate for someone to validate how crazy you feel in your feelings right to make you feel better for someone to say hey you know what that really sucked because you're not getting it from the person who was supposed to give it to you so she's gone out there she's written this down she's aired how she feels and maybe from that airing of how she feels she's received a small

semblance of like relief or something or a very large semblance or a great YSL gift but now I say imagine what's happening in her household because now she's become the villain in her household of this story I'm sure her husband's angry I'm sure her husband's like you know how dare you spread our relationship dramas on the internet and now he's been villainized especially if he's someone who cares so much about perception and about people's opinions of him like I think that this is an unfair situation where something has gone viral beyond what she would have ever imagined and of course it's really tricky as much as she has every right to say what she wants there is a conversation about airing your dirty laundry now she doesn't know the virality no one

would possibly know how viral it was going to go but in addition to that he's only angry because it's confronting because he's hold a mirror has been held up to his behavior and it is very hard to disagree with when millions of people are saying what the fuck all of a sudden you're having to look at yourself and think wow am i that much of an asshole if anything i do hope that the overwhelming response has given the person who originally wrote this a moment to take pause and take stock and go okay this isn't just me feeling as though I'm overreacting like I have been told I am by my husband maybe this is something that I do feel deeply not considered in my relationship and it's something that either he needs to take accountability for or this relationship may not

have legs for very much longer I would go so far as to say it's time to put that YSL mascara on Fucking get out there. Get out for a night. All right. It is time for our suck and our sweet. Keisha's leaving. And that's it for the episode. Yeah, there's no suck today.

Because everything's awesome and we're having the time. These are the times of our. Anyway. The floor is lava. I have so many songs, like breakup songs, that I want to sing for you over the next two weeks, Keisha. So I'm just going to randomly. We're not going to sing them, but we're going to put them in.

No, I'm just going to randomly break out in like farewell songs for you. I've written them all down because even at night time I'll be like, how do I live without you? And Matt's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, it's just songs for Keisha when she's leaving. She's like, you're fucking weird. My song is, even when I'm sleeping. Baby, bye, bye, bye.

Say my name, say my name. What was that? For the rest of her life she can say our name. Her name is Keisha. No, she has to say our name. Who are you to blame? Anyway, look, suck for the week is the key. Apple bottom jeans.

That's just a tune. Brittany's really missed the point of this segment. Human nature. What? I want to lay with you on a mountain. I want to bathe. I want to bathe with you. Have we laid on a mountain?

No, but we've bathed in the sea. Yeah, true. My last one is. And I will always. Okay. When you do that, you need to let me turn my headphones down. The winds now have plummeted. Okay, let's get into it.

So my suck for the week is that I have a sinus infection. And my high for the week is that we're all back together again. Not for long, but we are currently. And let's live in the moment. I hate disagreeing with you, but my suck this week is Keisha leaving. Same. And my sweet for the week is I don't have one because Keisha's leaving. Keisha, what's your suck for the week?

she's that she's leaving no her sweet said she's no not at all it's very obvious I've been very emotional about it for the last couple of days it's that I'm leaving and my sweet is that I still have legal guardianship over Delilah that's a good sweet my sweet is that I genuinely believe in my heart and I hope that I'm not wrong I think our friendship will be just as strong for the next like I really do take is it take solace I feel supported in the fact that our friendship will not deteriorate you know Laura as well she doesn't respond but I take solace in the fact that like once we finish this episode we are going to hog tie you and put you in my boots so it's fine I'll see you every day mascara I was wondering that anyway guys that is it from us you know

we'll be back like normal some of us yeah that's it for a month how long can we make those jokes one more week and you know the drill tell your mom tell your dad tell your dog tell your friends don't tell keisha and share the love because we love love