Life Wide Open with CboysTV - Evan's Massive Secret

Episode Date: September 6, 2022

In today's podcast, Evan reveals he's been keeping his big secret quiet, too many teas kick in, and CT has his big MTV break.  Thanks everyone for the support this far! Road to 200k   Follow us on Instagram @cboystv and @lifewideopenpodcast To watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/LifeWideOpenYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/LifeWideOpenWithCboysTV If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: https://bit.ly/LifeWideOpenWithCboysTV You can also check out our main YouTube channel CboysTV: https://www.youtube.com/c/CboysTV Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Nice. All right, let's get Evan one more. No, no, I'll be good. No, no. He needs to pee in like five minutes. Let's just give him the hard alcohol. In like five minutes. I'm going to give it tummy.

Hey, Mike, can you go get Evan a five-gallon bucket? So if you ask you to use the bathroom, he can use that. I'm wearing swim trunks. I can just let her fly, right? Oh, you could fly it out of your pant leg. We know you could let it slide. I don't know what that's supposed to mean. We could play the wet spot game.

It's when you, uh, You and your buddies are sitting in a bar And you all try to pee the smallest amount that you can Without actually peeing your pants And the person who pees the most has to buy a drink This is what you do with your friends at the bar Yeah No chance you've actually played that

Yeah, no, I played at Zorva's last weekend With who I won? Me, Brad and John Spratt brothers You know, there's not many places where I draw the line right I'd draw the line there. Pee in my pants deliberately in the bar. Yeah, but it's for a free drink.

This is all new to us. We didn't go to college, Ryan. We weren't in a frat. Did you do some, like, questionable things to get into your frat? Like, were you hazed? No, because my frat was really new. And so the people that started it were, like, really clean frat people. You know, I feel like, yeah, they're very PC.

As something gets older and more. people go through it that's when it starts to become degenerate and so we had like the type of people to start a fraternity not the people to type of to join it they were the people leading it so there was there was no tom foolery i almost wonder like if i was if i would have to go and choose like do i want that or do i want one where they really make you fucking have to work hard to get into it dude i've heard some crazy stuff like i feel like it'd be a little more honorable like you're like yeah i had to run through campus naked in the middle of the day to get into this frat like that's like a cool story kind of i've heard a radiator case race they put a whole case on top of

like a heater okay and then they get really hot and you have to drink it if you puke you have to do it all the ones like really mess what walk on legos um walking on legos no but with your knees holy fuck your way through legos um hmm i feel like i'd choose a legos that seems the most doable. And that's just like a mile of Legos. Dude, Legos hurt. Have you not stepped on one? Of course.

I'm not trying to kneel down on Legos. So you'd rather try to do the case race with the heater? I think you'd puke, actually. I mean, I probably would puke, but I'd rather give it a good try than just bash my knees into Legos. You'd rather drink 30 warm beers? Well, we started with a case. Now it's a Wisconsin case. You got a buddy, too, since it's only 50.

I'd give it a good run. Then Legos? Dude. You'd have to be drunk to crawl on the Legos. You might as well do the case race first and then crawl on the Legos. Now you're just doing both things, Ev. I want to get into the frat. That doesn't surprise me being that you're drinking a diet,

Mountain Dew, caffeine-free. What? I didn't even know that they made these. What happened to you, dude? Well, I was going to get a Sprite, and that seemed like it was awfully close. to a spray. Ryan is disgusted.

Yeah. You asked me about that. You're like, oh, I thought you didn't even say anything about the diet due that I put in there. If I see like a diet label or not standard Mountain Dew label, I don't even notice it.

Unless it's Mountain Dew overdrive it. Sold exclusive at Casey's. Where is that guy going? I say. Oh, he's got chicken strips on the pizzazz. Okay. Sorry. What are you thinking?

We'll get there. Dipping out. Oh, he knows what's coming? No. His interrogation? He didn't know idea. He actually has no idea. He never does.

I don't think he's getting interrogated. No, just questioned. Yeah. Ev, why don't you have another tea? Only if Ben serves it to me. Okay. I honestly thought you were just going to brush it off on Mike. Ev, aren't you?

sick right now he's sitting here slamming teas and drinking a mountain dew and it is diet diet i have i have been my back's thrown out and i'm getting drunk so do you feel like you got sick from ken no ken definitely got me sick i don't have covid but uh i feel like crap and i blame it on ken ken what you get in here i'm i'm confused on why are you sick right now ken I didn't get my bike all greasy. No, no, I'm feeling great. You were sick, though. It wasn't.

That's why I stayed home that day. So why do you feel like you got sick from Ken? Well, Ken's kind of the super spreader. What do you mean by that? Out at the bar smoking everybody's vapes. Ken is the town bike of vapes. Village vapes. Okay.

So you guys weren't kissing to clear it up. I was home for two days, and then I was fine. Where were you, Evan? I was not at home with Ken. That's what you're insinuating here. I didn't know that this is something that we had to put in, in like the employee rule book. What?

This relationship. There is no relationship, Ben. You're reading into this. Ten pages too deep. Oh, boy. What the fuck? That is a little. I have not had sexual relations with this man.

Sounds like Bill Clinton. Are you saying I was sneaking away from the shop to go cuddle with Ken when he's home sick? Well, I don't know, dude. You just came in. You came in hot today and you're like, I feel like, shit. Ken got me sick. I'm like, what? How do you get you sick?

Why are you sick and why are we not? I said absolutely nothing about that. I was insinuating that you were hitting his rape. But you just might have just shown your cards. No, I never hit Ken's vape, but he does hit mine all day. Let me. Is that code word for something now? Okay.

Let me go. Is that what you call it down there, F? Let me go over the timeline of who got sick when. I got sick after Wee Fest. I get better. Wait, why did you get sick at Wee Fest? Because it's Wee Fest. Oh, I thought it was from sharing vapes.

No, so I get sick after We Fest. CJ then gets sick About four days later And then now you're sick So it was CJ No, I live in a house with Ken Timeline doesn't line up for Evan after me I've been good for like two weeks

You're just fucking come in And you start saying Ken got you sick I just know Ken was sick last week And I'm sick this week I blamed on him How'd you know that Ken was at home sick? Because he wasn't here with me at the shop I'm just saying CJ's a possibility here

And Evan's bearing that So it means he's trying to hide something here A clean deflect This is like the CJ's like Okay, you know what Now that I'm getting brought into this Enough is enough

Whoa whoa whoa Let's get on to talking about something else It's like the Spider-Man meme Of everyone pointing at each other It's getting something a little bit more straight See Let's not talk about this kind of stuff This is a little

Lifewide Open podcast I'm not trying to talk about Ken and Evan Sucking each other's vapes See you're still trying to deflect it off of yourself here Ken I don't have a vape I'm saying you got Evan sick You were the last one sick here

Let's get it on a sum A little bit more straight though Enough of this Vap talk Yeah I felt like we gotta get back on track So we're sitting at the pub the other day and Nikki pulls her phone out and shows Ben and I this picture

turns out Evans been hiding a massive secret from us massive massive secret huge let's get on to something more strange anyways all right Ryan you go you go back

no no no no no no no Ken you're talking about this Ken not like talking about Evan's massive secret I think Ken's got a wherever we talk about Ken's got two big secrets First, you're infatuated with one secret, and now you're infatuated with this secret.

I'm sensing a pattern here. Hold on. What's the secret? What's the first secret? You tell the story, then I'll let you guess. Well, we talked about it on the last podcast about Ken's ginormous balls, which he doesn't like talking about. Turns out Evan's got a ginormous small arm down there.

Bro, it's a baby's arm holding an apple. We refer to it as Evan. But Ken, you get all, like, weird whenever we bring it up. Why are you so, like, in that, like, you just keep thinking about Evans hog. Ken, I, listen, dude. Why are you thinking about another man's dick? Ken, I think that what this boils down to is you just don't want to share the limelight. You were getting all its attention for having big balls, and now someone else comes in with something special.

I didn't like you talking about my ball. Now you're like, oh, enough about Evan's hog. Why are you talking about Evan's hog? Why are you talking about Evan's hog? Right. Yeah. You want us to go back to your balls, don't you? By balls and dick, CJ.

I don't know, man. It's just like everyone at the table was like, wow, that's awesome. And you're like, that's fucked up. Get tired of my face. I don't like that. Well, you're screaming about Evan's dick in a restaurant in the middle of the day. Hog. It was, hog.

Call it as hog. It was like, okay, we got to get another topic going here. I just don't understand why you weren't, like, congratulating him or, like, happy for him. You were like, you were talking about Evans. Everyone else there was happy. Thank you. Okay, CJ, you were drunk, but you were screaming about it in the restaurant. Like you normally do when you're drunk.

And I was like, shut the fuck up now. Hey, I was dead sober. And I was just, I was so, well, first of all, let's just talk about how nonchalant Nikki Evans' girlfriend showed me the photo. Like, oh, yeah, look at this. And I'm like, look, and I'm like, whoa. And then I'm like, whoa. And I'm like, why did you show me that? And she's like, oh, it's just so funny.

I think she was trying to like show it off, right? Because Evan's a humble man. And I'm like, I feel like Evan, low-key set her up to it. Yeah, I think so, too. And then I'm like, obviously, CJ, dude, you got to check this out, right? So I take the phone out of Nikki's hand. And she was like, oh, no, don't. You know, passing it around.

Evan's just sitting there across the table like this. Next thing you know, yeah, the whole table gets a look at the hog. Wow, I'm, congrats, bro. People are like shaking his hand, trying to buy him dinner. Yeah, and then it gets to Ken. Get that out of my face! Well, you're like passing this thing around, and I'm not paying attention. What the fuck?

And then you just hand me a basically just a picture of Evan, and I'm like, why the fuck did you just hand this to me? It's just awkward. It's like he was up on top. of the world Ben being the only guy was something special in the group

and then we shove Evan up there with him you need a little context of the photo it was me passed out naked in Vegas

yeah it wasn't just like a random hog pick it was literally me passed out off my balls in Vegas

drunk and she took a unflattering picture, which all of a sudden you guys think is so flattering. You'd think she was a photographer. She was working at angles. I mean... CJ, you got a dick problem here. You're just enamored by everything.

No, just Evan's hog. And you're nuts. You got a problem here. Hey, my dick is nowhere near as big as his balls. You guys both have something in common. What the fuck is this podcast? What is this podcast? So after we find out about Evan's Big Secret,

obviously we are all just in shock, right? And Nikki knew where our brains were going. The world needs to know. Yeah, I immediately said, we need to run a podcast. It's like, and she goes, no. It was almost like something overcame her. She lost control for a second. She goes, no!

And she realized she was like kind of recouped herself. I was like, you don't want me talking about it? this on the podcast she's like no no don't talk and now we're talking about it sorry about that niki do you think that's because it's it's like one of those things that probably shouldn't be shared to the world or do you think she's just trying to keep you under lock and key i think she just doesn't want other girls finding out about it yeah i mean yeah probably that i'm always Nicky stayed with Heaven through all these years, but after that picture, it all makes sense.

Makes sense. I shook Nikki's hand. I said, congratulations to you, too. So, Ken, what do you think about it? You know, I try to, that thought will enter my mind when you bring it up, and I'll immediately think of something else. Because I'm not interested in seven's dick. I'm just not interested in it.

I'm sure it feels like having a championship belt. and then just having it stripped from you. Ken, I wasn't into it's a tie. You got me, I'm sure it's like hard. Both hands held up. Are you living vicariously through Evan with this,

this picture, CJ? What? I am. If I think that means what I think it means, like I wish I had a hog like that. Yeah. Who doesn't?

100%. Who doesn't? That's why I'm surprised that you're like, you're like mad about it instead of like, Dude. We're going on two weeks now talking about this. Dude, it was getting old. It was getting old.

It was old the second you found out. Because I didn't care. Hey, coming from a guy who has to scrape his... For a limited time at McDonald's, enjoy the tasty breakfast trio. Your choice of chicken or sausage McMuffin or McGrittles with a hash brown and a small iced coffee for five bucks plus tax. Available until 11 a.m. at participating McDonald's restaurants. Price excludes flavored iced coffee and delivery.

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app or go to anchor.fm to get started. Calls off the boat seat with a spatula. Leave it be. All I'm saying is if I had either one of your two gifts, I would be walking around butt naked all the time. You'd go to jail. You're right. I would, yeah, I suppose.

But I'd just, I'd be showing it off. You already do, CJ. I don't need to see any more of you. For the record, I have seen C.J. j naked in my room more times than any other seaboy well it's because i don't like drying off in the uh bathroom because there's like dirt and shit on the floor you just want to the carpet on your toes right yeah of course yeah don't pick up all this dude i think that like you could make something out of this like in the sex industry maybe not today maybe not tomorrow but in like 15 years

Like, and you're still packing the way that you are And you want to take like a new route in life I'm gonna wait till I'm 50 to start my porn career You'll be like the dad next door Good It's got a good ring to it We know damn well that Ken won't be the camera guy Oh

Put that away, yeah We're filming a porno With nuts like that he'll be shooting the money shot We'll sub him in right at the end Holy shit Like a gallon of milk What would Ken's stage name be The watermelon nightmare

What would Benzby Angel hair What's that mean? What's that mean? what do you mean angel hair that would be a pretty bad name angel hair i don't know if there needs to be much more said but i'm just so happy for both of you moving on quit sharing each other's vapes it's so uncomfortable all right guys moving on you ready ryan i i've got food downstairs.

I really want to eat it, actually. We're in the middle of the podcast. You're more worried about chicken strips? Yes. There. So, Evan, circling back around, you know, I do like the carpet on my toes in your room because I don't pick up a bunch of dirt and sand on the bathroom because everyone walks in there after I shower.

But I do have one complaint. I know where this is going. Your room is, smells terrible. What are you keeping in there? So I've decided it's a 50-50. It's either my motocross gear or one night I took a whiz in the closet. There's no fucking way that you peeing in the closet could smell for this long and this bad. It's getting worse, dude.

Hold up. I think we just brushed over the whole peeing in the closet thing. I mean, I don't. Why do you think you peed in the closet? I don't think that I peed in the closet, but I don't know what else would smell that bad. So you know it smells bad. I catch a piss smell occasionally, but not right now because my boots. I don't know all your girlfriend stays in there with you.

I think she's just used to it. CJ, we know why she stays in the guy. Right, right. You got to make sacrifices for a guy like Evan. Dude, it's got to be the moto gear. The boots, the pants. Why have you taken it out in the last four months? When I walk past your room, I don't even go in it.

If I walk past in the hallway, it smells terrible. terrible. Like, I literally have to hold my breath walking past into the other bay. Well, you should buy me some febrees or something. Bro, what I need to buy you is a fucking mop and a vacuum and some fucking... I'm going to mop the carpet. I think we have to... I think we have to bulldoze the whole room. First thing tomorrow morning, I'm mopping the carpet.

I don't know what you need to. I'm going to see what C.J. says about that when it's all wet sheets. Yeah, I've never washed the bed sheets. Well, that's your biggest problem right there. I've only been here for like four months. How often are you supposed to do it? I don't know, at least every couple. Once a week?

Yeah, I'd say. Alex washes our sheets once a week. You wouldn't wash your sheets once a week. I'd do it every two weeks if it was me. You wouldn't. Do you do your own laundry? Yeah. I even do Alex's too, unfortunately.

Evan, really? Four months? She doesn't do it. I don't know. I usually just sleep there. I don't really put much more thought into it. I just... In Evan's defense for the first month,

he actually didn't even have sheets. He just slept on a mattress, didn't complain. Raw dog lifestyle. I can't appreciate that about you. You just kind of raw dog life. And that's cool. I think maybe just start by taking the used four sets of moto boots out. As well as all the empty teacons.

Yeah, for a while there, Evan was just collecting garbage in there. I thought you were a hoarder for the first little bit. I wasn't trying to collect garbage. I just had a good idea for a few hundred TKins. tea cans. Bro, they were all over the place. They were littered. I was like, man, this guy just...

What was the idea? I'm down. I just wanted to fill the side-by-side full of teacans and have Micah hit the big jump in it. And then all the teacons would be... That'd be funny, dude. Yeah. So did you quit collecting them? I think we should have done that.

I'm pretty sure you had enough in your room to do that. Well, there were rumors that my room stunk, so I got rid of them. Oh. Why didn't you just, like, put them outside? They're hidden in a garbage bag somewhere. Okay. So you still have it. Sweet.

In his closet. Yes. Oh, are they? It's probably mold, dude. In that big garbage bag. Take them out. It's not the T's that smell. It probably is.

The T's have never done me wrong. They might have. Bro, have you ever poured a twisted T out on the ground and let it dry? It's like black. Not since the lights, though. Hey, I really do think that one day after I got done riding, I left my boots outside. I feel like a dog.

peed on my boots. And I know this sounds ridiculous. Are you sure it wasn't you? Dude. You're the dog? It could have happened. Why do you think that of all things? Because I have an old pair of boots that smell like every other pair of shoes I've ever

owned. And then I have this new pair of boots that I've had for a short period of time and they reek worse than anything my body could admit. That seems super far fetch being that we don't even have a dog. dude your smell waffles comes over and hangs out there's dogs all over the place what dogs wanders over one time and you blame your room smelling like piss on that dog it was a nice room before i haven't moved in oh god clean clean good smell in space now good small space i said good smelling oh when i think of your room i can smell it it's like living in my head

head, rent-free. Like, if I think of it, I smell it. We actually went through this whole thing when you were gone on, like, Tuesday. Every time CJ and Ben would walk by, I was, like, down in the main bay, and they'd walk by and go, oh. It was bad. You want to know what it smells like? It smells like sour cream chips. Like, like, when we get those little packs of the sour cream lays, that's what it smells like, dude.

Well, maybe I left a half a bag open. I don't know. No, it's probably the garbage. bag full of teas in the closet. I think we leave this, Asby, and we'll make a video bit trying to fix this problem that we're having. Would you consider yourself a hoarder? I don't think having stinky boots and tea cans for a bit counts as being a hoarder.

We call TLC. They come in. Oh, my God. This is terrible. It's just like, they make a full episode. Evan just laying on his bed. It's like a 10 by 12 room. Phil four dumpsters

It's like the bag The magical bag That you can like Pull like ironing boards out of and stuff Yeah They pull like a full size like car Out of the room He's got this use Hanah Civic

Doesn't run anymore Why are you keeping this heaven I might fix it up someday Has Mike been telling you to store some of his shit too He's kind of a hoarder Mike goes Yes I got Mike's back

and you too good kids good kids just need to learn you know I guess not leave your boots out to get pissed in exactly

I'm blaming the dog I just put them in a shipping container they'll be good to go then you guys will be complaining that all your gear that's in the shipping container now smells like my piss boots Jesus

the shipping container smells like shit start seeping up through the floor CJ's office is right above it then he'll have to move out dude I did actually have that thought I was thinking to myself, I'm glad my office isn't above Evans' room because what if the smell seeped up through the floor?

And, like, I'm kind of a, I'm actually a very paranoid person, as most people know. And I'd probably, like, be sitting there, I'd be like, I think I can smell it. Like, I'm glad I'm far, I'm far from it. I'll tell you what. I'll go to Walmart. I'll spend about $6,

get some boot spray. It'll be fresher than ever. How about you just put your boots somewhere? Outside across the street. What? Evan, do you have separation anxiety with your boots? What do you sleep with those things on? Why do you need them next to your bed?

I mean, I guess I don't. I just try to wake him on one day. He's got his fucking opine stars on, tech tens. Well, you're telling me to put stuff here and there. I just figured I'd keep all my stuff condensed into one area because that's nice. In my head, it made sense. I agree. Well, we want your boots out of the room.

I'll blend my stink in with the rest of your guys stuff. That's fine. Speaking of. Dicks. Cripes. Going back onto it. Oh, man. Sorry.

I'm going to edit this thing fucking mundane. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Okay. Imagine this. It's 2030. The world has completely gone to shit.

That's in like eight years. Right. That's very possible. Could be. Okay. The world has completely gone to shit. Dumpster fires everywhere. And, um...

The whole world smells like Evan's boots. Yeah, the whole world. It feels like Evans' boots. And aliens have, have, like, started a war with Earth. Okay. Okay. And it's basically, like, it's just like a countdown timer. Yo, this is like the end of the world.

Uh-huh. It's inevitable. Nobody can avoid it. Nobody can save us. It is what it is, right? Well, then the government or some secret service is just like, fuck it, should we do it? Then they're sitting at a board meeting.

I don't know. Should we do it? Why not? Why not? The end of the world is in seven days. Let's do it. They release that all of the sensors on urinals were actually cameras. And they've been filming everyone's dicks this entire time.

And they come out with who had the biggest dick of them all. And it's a mugshot of that. And they just release it as public information for the world to see. Can you imagine? be a bad day for me and a good day for heaven that's what it'd be but why i don't know i just envision everyone's driver's license being a dick bit you'd like that wouldn't you having to be showing his his ID to everyone they're like no no you don't need to show your ID to get in unless you want to drink yeah you're mad if you don't get carded yeah evans at the bar waitress comes

up goes what would you like oh i'll take a tea she goes okay cool don't you want a card me she's like no you're a regular in here it's okay i trust you evan oh stop i just took a new picture bro i'd get a fake id you have to you have to see i just noticed you're wearing a south park shirt no you like it what you know what's kind of funny what is i've always thought of you of a little bit of a less fat version of cartman that as a compliment or uh oh my god he's throwing up get in the camera make sure he's on the camera what the hell oh my god what the hell ken what did you do to this guy he's sick that's madman someone go get him a bucket go get him a ball oh my god that trash can has holes in it

I get to smell it This guy's a hand in a hurry This guy's a monster Oh my god What just happened? It was all those damn teas You made me shotgun three tees I tried to hit my vape

I laughed at the same time With something funny And it made me die I did not think you shotgun three tees I was voluntarily Oh my God, it smells like vape It smells like vape No, it actually smells like Kevin's...

I mean, in all reality, I'm fine. Is everyone else? Dude, I think you're vape and Ken's vape? Listen to me here. I think your guys' vapes are like the spawn of sickness. Because everyone's always puffing on them and shit. You go somewhere, be like, hey, can I be the puff? You guys are passing around in your little corner.

No wonder you guys are always sick. What just happened? It's like instant sickness. I think I explained it. You made me beerbong three T's. Oh, all of a sudden, Evan can't drink three teas. What? That was quick succession, even for me.

It really does smell like your bake. It does. That's all I smell. Why is it so smoky in here? Well, that was in. Look how smoky it is in here. It's quite a party trick, Evan. Other guys blow O's and you're over here puking.

Hey, hey, can somebody get this guy like a wet rag or something? And maybe a water? Puk all over his hand. I can remove myself now. Not after that type of... Not after? Should we get them out of here? Have you?

You cannot, bro. Take your garbage with you. Hey, why don't you just go back to your smelly room and get some rest? This is officially the wildest podcast we've ever filmed. Mm-hmm. Anyways, back to my shirt. Yeah, let's talk about his shirt. It was that joke.

That's the one that did it for it. Dude, Evan thought it was so funny That it was so true I have told funny jokes But I've never made anyone throw up My joke was so bad Ryan's a funny Or Ryan's a funny guy

Ryan I think somebody has to tell you That you've told funny jokes I am curious now It was hilarious I'll vote Why do I Why do I remind you of a Carmen I actually do love Carmen I grew up watching South Park

Like I've watched that show since I was probably Like a third grade I even still watch it today go to bed watching it, make Alex watch it with me. I claim a lot, pretty much all my humor from South Park. I don't know. It's kind of like an asshole. No, see, I was going to say that.

I don't think that you take a lot of the negative aspects of Cartman, him being a dick. Well, Carmen's the funniest guy on the show. I'll take that as a compliment. So where the compliment comes in is Cartman is always the ringleader in some really fucked up idea that he asked. that is so funny that normally like uses one of his friends's talent, lack of talent or characteristic and uses it to his advantage to be funny. And not that you take advantage of us, but you're so good at finding someone's uniqueness and making it hilarious.

A joke. Oh, joke out of it. I've thought it for a long time, but I've never wanted to just Snapchat you and be like, Carmen reminds me of CJ because I feel like it would come across Like a little asshole Like a distant A really dick thing for me to say

Just off of the Carmen gets their guys to go along On a lot of wild adventures Like wasn't it Carmen who when they They were doing the World of Warcraft thing And he got all his friends To gang together

And play a world World of Warcraft And then beat out the guy You'd be like fuck this guy We're gonna all get together And beat him That's something that you would Rope us all in

too in a way i'd take that as compliment i think you should i think you should take it as a compliment that is fucking hilarious and also i want everyone to go home and watch south park and then think of cj yeah like i think the crack baby basketball association was totally like a great idea i don't know why they're not exactly like you're fucking like the fat kid like the fat kid lemonade stand that's something he would come up with except for you'd probably do it like with crack babies or cj who do you think ryan would be kyle fuck I knew that cow could be cool sometimes If one's Ken

If anything bends the other Cartman I'd say you're just as much of Carmen as me You both have Carmen characteristics Like when When Carmen figured out his mom was making money In real estate And he shut out his mom And

Made our money Which one's Ken you said Which one is Ken? Don't say it, CJ I know what you're going to say Ken it looks like someone I know what you're going to say Don't say it

Chef What I'm actually not who I thought you were going to say What would Micah be? What would Micah be? Do you put the condom on? Okay, I got it out. What are I do next? It's sound like him.

Who would Mike be? Yeah, butters would probably be pretty good. If anything, Evan, would be fucking butters. Dude, South Park is such a great show. And it's been going for, like, 23 years. I think it started in, like, 99 or something like that. And the fact that they haven't been canceled, just based off of, like, the jokes and the humor that they have,

they got to be one of the last running kind of, like, dark humor shows. You know, they've gotten soft. I feel like in their newest, like, later years. So, like, in recent years, they're not nearly as edgy. Like, if you watch the old ones, they're so funny. I used to be, you used to say that and be like, no, the new ones aren't funny because they've kind of like storylined it and now I go watch the old ones I'm watching new ones and I think the same thing it is tough ones are ruthless they're ruthless

different time you could say whatever you wanted and people thought it was funny just think that was on cable TV like you can just watch it I know it shaped their uh the youth at the definitely did this is what we got what TV shows do you think shaped you guys the most we're gonna chalk south park up in there hey guys quick break in today's podcast for a word from our longtime sponsor, Manscaped. Summer is coming to an end, fellas, and if you haven't been manscaping the summer, it's not too late to freshen up before fall

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No TV. Rocket Power was kind of on the way out like when I started watching TV. He's lying. What do you mean? I'm lying. You never watch TV. He's trying to blend in. He's just trying to fit in right now.

What are you talking? I do remember that when I was first friends with Ben, I walked in their house, and there wasn't a fucking TV in sight. There's no TV on the first two. That's a good thing, I will say. The first two floors of the house didn't have a TV. And I, like, walked in.

I was like, Hey, where are we going to watch TV? Where are we going to? What are the fruit snacks in Mountain Dew? Just be like, hey, I'm hungry. Can I have some food. food and there's like a salad and so a jug of water and some ice like you expect me to eat healthy okay anyway but what shows um did you guys ever watch fuel tv yeah like that's good stuff

yeah i didn't i never had satellite tv so i never watched fuel what was on fuel it was like 80% surfing no no that was at the end but i would say it was like kind of just like motor sports dude it'd be like a hot ass day and ben and i would be sitting there on the couch watching fuel TV because they'd have like dirt bikes and shit on and we loved it like I'd imagine for kids growing up now we are probably kind of their outlet to watch a lot of motorcross with also like personality and stuff or just motorsports in general but we thought it was so entertaining because realistically that was the only place you could get it so they had it on we would like drop everything we were doing to watch like like firsthand great ride open

great ride open was awesome they'd go all these different spots and and and it was like a bunch of really good more so retired pro riders and they would hit these just cool spots and what was that have like different documentaries and stuff on like riders like i remember watching twitches and like brian deans and yeah those sweet firsthand with like Travis pastrana and like i remember watching bilko uh he was on it and he had white tires and i thought that was insane i was like this guy's got white tires on a dirt bike yeah yeah he used to do colored tires yeah he used to do colored tires Yeah, he had white tires. It's so cool.

It is crazy when you think about it, though. That's how we wanted to watch. And it was hard to find. It was very hard to find. So now it's like you can kind of get that by just searching it. But I still think there's not a whole lot of people maybe making this kind of stuff. Hence why we've been able to kind of excel a little bit in our, you know, whatever. Our videos, our channel is pretty much exactly what Fuel TV.

used to be. They were jumping blazers in a pool? Well, less skill, but like same. It was like a mixed idea. Same idea and same action sports. And so like, and then crazy antics. That's like what shaped me and CJ just to be into what we were doing as like kids. Like we would watch, I don't know, whatever was on fuel TV and then go and ride dirt bikes

or go, like, hype you up, yeah. Go surf or go set up two ramps and I don't know. It's just like what we were doing. So you asked like what shape. I would say just that channel in general. Yeah, and then just like MTV stuff. Yeah, MTV used to be so lit. Yeah, MTV used to be so lit.

I wonder what it's like nowadays. I don't even have any way of watching it. I don't have TV. I think it's just Rob Deerick 24-Sys. He runs that whole network. Yeah, he actually does. Which is pretty cool. I'm surprised that neither of you brought up Fantasy Factory.

Oh, God. Yeah, Fantasy Factory and then Nitro Circus, obviously. Holy shit, it already aired. I wasn't on Ridiclessness. But I was on Deliciousness. Deliciousness? Yeah, it's a whole new show. Or maybe it was just, maybe it was on ridiculous.

I don't even know. But MTV, they like go around and, uh, they buy clips, obviously or just get permission to use your clip on ridiculousness. I think they said they were starting a new show called Deliciousness. And it was like the same concept, except it was about food. But they ended up buying the clip of me breaking the, uh, they tried getting it from free, but I was like, no way, you're buying this shit. How much did they pay for it?

Not enough at all. $200. $200? $200. I sold a clip for $200. Yeah, I literally, I didn't even pocket the money. I put our company bank info in. Which clip?

The one when I break the window at the drive-thru and Mike Subi had to have the food with the crowbar, that's what's the one they bought. They bought it literally like a year and a half ago. And I just kind of forgot about it. And then the guy emailed me at like the end of July. And he goes, hey, CJ. just wanted to let you know

your clip is going live August 28th. So now it's sick. Two or three days past that. Monday. And I guess it already aired and I missed it because I don't have cable TV. So if anyone saw it, you should send me it. Who the fuck is watching? Deliciousness.

Yeah, you're right. I wish it would have been on. I still don't know if it was on ridiculousness or deliciousness. But either way, supposedly it's a Rob Deerick inspired show. So I finally made it on MTV. That's pretty sweet. Wow.

Every single time that we watch that, it's usually when we're traveling and we're like in a hotel or something like that. But every single time that we watch ridiculousness or one of the 15 spin-off is-ness things that they have, I'm always watching these clips wondering, how have I never seen these before? Being that the internet is now just shares clips everywhere, but it seems like they get these clips that nobody has ever seen before. It's same thing with like America's home America's funniest videos

Dude that shit was so funny That was like before the internet obviously So nobody could see it I was like family friendly But still I feel like like where are they finding these I think they still do those shows And you can watch ridiculousness You can watch five episodes of ridiculousness

And never see a clip that you've seen on the internet Which to me is insane Yeah But then again They internet is big But they also hit up like a YouTuber to take one of their clips, you know, so they got to be taking them from.

That's really, that could never win viral. It's just like a very small portion on our video. I'm sure you could literally, if you scan through our whole channel, they could probably find so many different clips. I'm surprised they don't do that. Maybe our clips aren't that good.

Never mind. We got hit up by Chive TV like five years ago, back when we were. Was it that long ago? Dude, it was a long time ago. We had like a couple hundred thousand subs. Really? okay and chive tv if you have ever been at a bar you've seen chive tv playing well anyway they hit us up

like five years ago and was just like hey can you guys sign off for us to use your content and at the time like we didn't really think anything of it or like trying to negotiate ever we did we tried negotiating but oh they were like we don't pay for it and we just decided that the publicity and the coolness factor of being out of bar and having your whatever playing at the time but we did say you have to give us credit yeah you have to give us credit put it at the bottom of the screen and at the time they used to like do like pretty decent credit you know you could definitely like see yeah readable and now like like I don't know if they had some law changed where it's like watermark transparency down to like 20 so bro I was watching I couldn't even barely see it and then I finally saw it was like way down there

it just says see boys TV bottom right corner hardly hardly readable yeah generic font yeah it is it's still kind of cool to be like out and about at the bars and like look up and see us doing something. It happens a lot. They play our clips a lot. And it's like we drop a video on Thursday and we'll be out on Friday or Saturday and it's like the Thursday video. It's like a catch 22 thing where it's like it is cool but it's also kind of like annoying that one they don't really give you credit. But two, it's like kind of takes away the shock factor than of people watching like the video seeing it for the first time. Do you think that happens?

Or do you think it's a completely different market? I don't know. I think it's a different market. And I also think it gives you a little validity. I'm trying to think of something else. Yeah, it's pretty dumb, dude. Because I remember the one time when we were at Zorba's, and it was like on a Sunday and all the locals were there.

And everyone for some reason was like watching the Chive TV. And then like a segment came on where we were like, it was a bunch of our clips. And like people literally turned around and started clapping at us. What? Yeah. It was just like, you know, our normal crew or whatever but they were like so hyped on it and i think it was just me ken and

maybe mike there and we were just kind of like like it was like we finally did something good something about because we were on the tv something about the tv still carries weight it carries a lot of weight you know you see especially older people true that's pretty funny though imagine watching it and knowing nothing about us but just knowing that we're like local idiots that just like run around with a filming our lives or doing something like that.

Just for tribe TV. Yeah and then you look up and you look oh my God they made it. They're on the TV. On the TV. You know what is funny? How just how big the internet is?

Like what's, I actually don't know the guy's Instagram because he's Russian but the Chernobyl life guy We should We should Somehow contact him He can come over

Join the team the one that does like death-defying stunts you know what actually now I think about he probably wouldn't be suitable for YouTube honestly probably does such dangerous stuff it's like incredibly dangerous pull pull up should I pull some clips okay all right so he's private actually on Instagram now because his other account got taken now but look at this like he's doing things that all these are happening so fast they don't even really make sense and they're actually cutting out the fall of it but like this is actually the most crazy stunts I've ever seen yeah they're also the most pointless stunts yeah I know the majority of them

and the crazy thing is if you go to his Instagram he does not have that many like that many followers like his other account got shut down but his one's got 390 he's doing this for 300 99,000 people on Instagram, legitimately risking his life every stunt. The clip I sold them, dude.

What? Oh. I just sent it in the group. Okay. I got 200 bucks for that one. So, that kid following. You know, it was. Hold that up, Ryan.

Oh, whoa. Now this is. I shouldn't have titled that. I thought it would get more views, but I only got about 1,000. 13 years ago you posted this, Evan. Dude, I was in like 10th grade. Holy shit, dude. Maybe younger.

I love your thumbnail, dude. You have a. Evan's been a YouTube or long. I didn't even know what a thumbnail was then. Look at this Microsoft paint intro here. Steve Roginski. Place, paste plant. Oh, my.

Oh, no. Dude, I've seen that before. Where the bikes puts in half. The best part is the wheel. Everything came apart. The wheel went almost two blocks. It just rode on the forks and took off. Did he know that was going to happen?

I think everyone, but him knew it was going to happen. Did you guys loosen all the parts on that bike? No, it was just, it was bending more and more every jumpy hit when you're like, do one more big one. Well, there's your problem. It was a mongoose. Oh, shit, dude.

He really skinned his chin up there. Steve O'Gainsky. Slash right on the mongoose. A movie by Evan's chef. That was back before he was dude Evan, bro. That was kind of legendary, dude. What I think is crazy is I sold that, like, that was 13 years ago. 12 years ago for 200 bucks.

Yeah, that's all they fucking give you. But I thought it was bullshit. Inflation, you should have got more than that. Who did you sell it to? It only hurts when I laugh. Real TV or true TV. Yeah, true TV. True TV.

Dude, I was still on MySpace when that video went up. I remember posting like, oh my God, this clip's going to be on TV. Dude, I never had a MySpace. I wasn't allowed to when it was popping. And then by the time I was allowed to, it's not popping. I should make one. I also wasn't allowed to, but I went to my friend's house and just did it there. Is it funny how back in the day people, especially like parents, were so afraid about you being on the internet is like if you make a MySpace account, like, people are going to come and find you and like kidnap you kind of thing.

Like I don't know what they were so worried about, but they're like, you should not put your name out there like that. Like it was as if you were like putting your address online and telling them your garage. code to come inside like and look at us now dude yeah i know and i anyways i remember i went over to one of my friends house and he had like older siblings i think i was in like the sixth grade and uh anyway so we go over there he's like come on let's go on the computer like going going there he's like you got a facebook right and i'm like uh i don't even know what that is like you know what a facebook is he like types it in he's like i'll make you an account makes me an account and i realized like what it is after he makes it i'm like oh no

I come home and I just like go to my parents I like go to my room I'm like Guys I made a big big mistake I didn't have any control But my friend made me a A Facebook And they were like

Well how do we delete it Couldn't fucking figure out I delete it And I still have that Facebook to this day But it is funny though Everyone was so worried about it That's how Ken was for me He was the one who introduced me to Facebook Because Ken was a couple years older

So he was my bad influence What were you doing on Facebook, Ken? We're playing Mafia boss, dude. You guys remember that game on Facebook? Dude, my mob. Our mafia's got to be fucking killing it right now. It's been like 15 years. Ken still keeps up on his daily.

Ken's logging into his Facebook right now, hopefully. Did you guys ever play Arm Simulator? Farmville. No, Farmville, yeah. Farmville, yeah, dude. I did. That was my shit, too. Is that like the same thing?

You start like a village or like mob? Yeah, but this is you had a mob and then you bought, different businesses that made you money for all the time that you were not logged in. So, you know, you had to be logged in and do little tasks. And then you got money. And then when you'd be logged off, you'd make more money. Basically what set Ryan up for this life of crime. Yeah.

He lives. He's a con artist. Speaking of conning people, I'm selling your jet ski going. See? That's just one of his many he's got going right now. So selling the jet ski, I've gotten mostly, like, you can't sell it unless you flip it. type of responses which is kind of annoying but whatever no real biters there's some guy who's selling the exact same jet ski for 15 grand so he probably also got fucked over because

i'm selling mine for 12 5 if anybody wants to buy a jet ski i'm pretty desperate at this point right don't show your cards like that bro i don't even really want to get into it because i'm just going to sound whiny but dude i've had a bad time selling my camarinal what do you mean didn't you like just throw it up yeah i put on facebook marketplace and then i've started joining different groups and so i'll put it you know in like six gen camero zl1 owners only like all this yep and normally in one fucking group some guy will be like yo this is seaboy's car always fine they go you know couple likes on it oh cool whatever yeah hell fucking today some guy comments and goes let me just let me just read it just just

beat the hell out of it and i don't know yeah yeah exactly he goes would recommend anyone that is thinking about buying this car to do your research on it comments some guy comments right back tell us what you know i wouldn't buy shit from these guys look them up online the title of the video with this car literally says i bought a camaro to do burnouts i'd look for something that hasn't had to piss beaten out of it personally what's you respond so i respond calmly you sound like the type of guy to not have sex with your girlfriend so she's better for the next guy. So she's still fresh for the next guy.

Yeah. I know. Fuck. Whatever. But I just was at look it up. See Boys TV on YouTube. Cars under warranty for the next two and half years. Did a couple of burnouts. Difted on a track. Replace the triers and drove it normal. Great car with no issues. Chevy built a damn good car that can handle a few Bernies. And then I corrected myself. There's five years, 100,000 miles. Pretty good warranty. Yeah, it's great. Then he responds, could care less what I sound like to one of the entitled boys. Common sense is that no one wants to buy it purposely,

wants to purposely buy something that the previous owner bought to beat on. I also find it interesting how you failed to mention how you treated the car in your initial posting and waited until someone said something about it, and now you here are trying to cover your tracks. Takes both kinds, good luck with your sale. Pull this guy up. Pull this guy up. That's right.

Yeah, let's see. This dude. What a pussy. Let me see. He's wearing a cowboy hat. Which one is it? I don't know. I think it's him and his boyfriend.

Kind of a cute couple. Dude, who makes their Facebook profile picture, you and another guy. That's a sauce, dude. It's literally broke back mountain right there. God, it'd be fun to just go in on it, but at the same time, don't even waste your time. Yeah, no, that's kind of, I even was a little bit embarrassed. that I had responded that much to it. But a few people have liked my comments.

Nobody's liked his. Who the fuck doesn't do a burnout with their Camaro? Yeah. And it is, first stop. Don't you and Ken have a profile picture together on your Facebook? Shut up, shut up. It's you two together like this. I thought that was a private account.

But anyway, so a lot of people, like, especially our subscribers. Well, what the fuck he's from Minnesota? Well, obviously. He's fallen out by one person and one person I know and then another one. Yo, you know what's funny? Does that mean two? He's followed by one person I know and another one? Yes, Evan, it does.

Yo, you know what's funny is he had to listen to this entire podcast to see, you know, when he comes, when he's going to bring him up. Exactly. And he had to listen through all the dicks say. Art, no, it is funny because our, not, I don't want to say all of them, but there is a small portion. maybe even bigger than small where they are like

like if you let's say are riding a razor and you have your foot to the floor and you drive it to 90 miles an hour and it's hitting the rev limiter they're like I would never buy that from you

I'm like what? What? Why? Just from hitting the rev limiter and they're like that's so hard they think it's so hard on the machine like if you were driving it fast or whatever I'm like dude they have a rev limiter for a reason and they also sell more tires like get over it it's like it's a fast car

it's a fast machine they're made to go fast like if i've learned anything out of how much abuse we have putting so many different vehicles through over the years is things are tough yeah like to actually damage something that is like a motor i'm talking like you didn't crash it or something like you just were ripping on a vehicle and if it's completely stock it is incredibly hard to cause damage like if it's a maintenance vehicle it's just and and a lot of people for some reason think like oh like he ripped it so hard and i remember as a kid i felt that way about like my dirt bikes or whatever like if i had someone else ride it and they were riding it hard i was like thinking oh like they're wearing my bike out but realistically you're not

you just not i'm just gonna tell you things are tough like a lot tougher than a lot of people think so not to play devil's avocado but on the um uh racing a lot more that we bought a couple so that's a piece of shit that's modified frankenstein right right right no no no you had a good point with stock you you had a good point and i'm not disagreeing with you i agree completely most things are much stronger than you would ever uh for daily use you'd ever put them through. That's what I mean. That Briggs and Stratton is made to, like, run a fucking lawnmower, not a racing lawnmower.

Exactly. Yeah. So anyway, we get this racing lawnmower. The thing was modified and before Evan could even start it. Believe it or not, they don't sell racing lawn mow. No, no, no, no. Before Evan could even start it, the guy was like, hey, we totally got ripped. We get it.

We get it back here. And it ran for probably four minutes since, like, start to finish. And I was pretty pissed about it because, like, I think it was, I think it was, like, $2,400 bucks. Like, it was not cheap. Anybody else, like, buying it to, like, actually buy a racing lawnmour and, like, do stuff with versus, well, even, even us. But, like, if it was somebody, you know, who wanted a very reliable machine because they'd saved up money and, like, they wanted to start racing or do something like that, right? then it's like really fucked up for this guy to know that and sell him basically a waiting ticking time bump like there's no way there's no way that this guy didn't know if i'm selling something like i expect

them to go like ride it like ride it like ride it hard i mean a dirt bike or racing lawnmore they're made to go fast go drive it fast and if it doesn't do it in your test run obviously i'm not selling a good product. Yeah, so this guy goes, B-Rad. B-rad. Wait, B-Rad? No, it's not that B-Rad.

His name is Brad. Okay, we'll call him Brad. Okay. Brad messaged me this morning, and he goes, now that you have blown up that mower, are you going to junk it? I'd be willing to buy it back for parts. Dude, fuck you.

I can't even say what I want to tell him. I responded, I'd sell it to you for what I bought it for, being that it lasted about two minutes and the guy just responded LOLL what put his name out here dude the thing is anyone can say anything they want about us wrecking it

we literally started it and hardly got it around the yard and it blew up so we did nothing to that long more I have plenty to say on this from now on I know we were complaining about our Facebook marketplace purchases being so bad from now on the new series

is we read the description and then we go and film picking it up. These guys are going to be on camera if they try ripping you off. We're not going to just do this blind send Evan, send Ken, give them the money, don't even start it type of thing.

We're filming it, and I think things will really churn around. Because no one's going to want to... And then if they do, they do rip you off, they just got their face put out. Yeah. Like, it's probably too late to go back through

and put these guys on blast, but... So that, yeah, that's kind of where I'm debating how liable are you after you sell it? You're not. You're not. But I'm saying from now on, like, so it's like, you know, to go after him and just be like, dude, fuck you. So did he know? He totally did.

Yeah, you probably did. Just because you're not liable doesn't mean you're not a dick. That's very true. That's true. But in the, in the status of Michael Merrill, I guarantee you could go out there and literally do burn out so the tires popped and nothing will happen that motor is bulletproof if something happens go take it to the fucking dealership it's on warranty for the next 98000 miles no i agree and the paint's perfect yeah i was like i think the problem with buying this is so hopefully my family

doesn't listen to this buying stuff that we own is like dating a porn star okay every dirt use dirt bike you buy every used snowmobile whatever it's been put through the ringer the guy bought it he used it but ours are filmed and put on the internet so you can watch said camero do a burnout and go to a drift track and then you go ooh i don't really like that so if you're scared of what it's done you want to go buy the car let it sit in storage and collect dust that's that's that's on you man yeah that's a great point but it just it is tough knowing watching what it's been through yeah yeah that's honestly an insanely accurate representation of our vehicles but I think watching what it's been through as you compare it to a porn star

yeah like weirdly yeah I think what people don't understand though is like they think we're just out beat the shit out of it 24 7 when it's like if you actually want to know what it's been through it's we're never going to really beat on it outside of the video so it's like three burnouts try and find a Camaro out there like your Camaro that has not done countless burnouts but if you were to do just a random burnout you'd be like I should probably film this or like make it worth it if I'm going to post my tires you know I have not done a burnout in that car not on camera exactly why would you yeah why would I because I might as well film it we might as well make a spectacle most Camaro owners probably would

My Camaro has done no behind the bar BJs. It's all on camera. You know what it's been through. Nothing more, nothing less. It's not going to lie to you. It's not going to lie to you about his past. It's all out there to see. It's not afraid of what it's done.

But it's going to love you. Like no other Camaro could. Man, you were making some uncomfortable eye contact with me right now, Ryan. Hey, man. You were talking about dicks in the beginning of this. I think that's, I think that's cool. I don't see what's wrong with talking about dicks. No, I honestly, I'm proud of Evan.

I'm glad that he, that's cool. I hate to say, but I think it's a little bit more suss when someone brings up dicks and you go, whoa, whoa, whoa. Why is he talking about dicks? Like, clearly, like, I don't have any problem about it. Like, I'm not, like, I don't know. I just feel like I'm pretty confident in my sexuality where I can talk about how much of a hog my best friend Evan has.

Dude, I'm fucking proud of you, dude. Like, I'm just proud about it. I literally texted Alex about it when I found out. I said, you got to hear this. You texted your girlfriend about my penis? I said, we just, well, she was asking me what was going on. I said, we just found out Evan has a hog. She was just like, no, he doesn't.

L.O.I said, you have Nikki show you the picture. She doubted me? Yeah, I think, Evan, I think your frame is a little misleading to your penis size. Yeah, she didn't believe it. I told her, ask Nikki. She'll probably show you the picture. I don't know. It has been making its way around town.

Yeah. Do you think she could send me that picture just for the podcast? We're going to pop it up right here. The people that may be able to do that I want to know. Yeah, we can throw it up right here. Okay, cool. Yo, I, um, somebody on a plane was air dropping nudes to other passengers. And then the pilots were like, if somebody, whoever it is keeps doing this,

we're going to land this plane and everyone's going to have to get off. They couldn't figure out who it was, right? I have a feeling that whoever was doing it would probably continue to do it just to be even more of a troll. Yeah, because imagine if they actually... That's it. We're turning this plane around. I'm just punishing everyone, dude.

Could you imagine turning an entire plane around for sending nudes? Dude, if Ken was the pilot, he probably would. I know I'm doing the next time we're riding in his Tesla. Well, you're at it. You should hair drop that. You should send that to me.

Dude, I don't even have it. Dude. Nick probably won't let Evan have it because you know he'd be shown everyone. Nick, he's going to have that thing locked up like the Mona Lisa. Yeah. There's only going to be one true copy of it. Wait a minute. That's what I was going to.

Could this benefit me financially? I can't believe that you just talked about an NFT. Evan, you've really made stride since coming here. Dude, if I get paid money for Wiener pitchers, easy all day. Dude, you know that you could just take one. Like, you don't have to get that specific one. Heaven's into crypto. He's reading books.

He gets on the... For NFTs. Come on, maybe I'd read the internet. How many books are there on crypto? Probably tons, dude. You read things on the internet, CJ. When's the last time you've picked up a book to read something? Well, I'm dumb.

You don't want to ask me, but I'm sure plenty of smart people read books all the time. Nobody reads books. You read your... Tablet. No, people definitely still read books, Evan. I've never read a book. Evan, when was the last time you read a book? I'd be curious.

Sometime in early high school? Really? Made it through his junior senior year without reading a book. Honestly, I quit reading books, too. In high school, I would just spark notes it. Dude, exactly. That's what I'm saying. Maybe freshman year when I thought I had to actually do it

and then I learned about Spark Notes, I never read again. Yeah, I'd agree. with that i don't think i did either and it shows i'm a terrible reader but i mean like we all read stuff all the time but it is never out of a book start to finish like read a whole book that never happens anybody here read a book in the last two years from cover to cover i think i did actually i did too yeah believe it or not fucking where's waldo i actually used to be a good reader when i was young Pop a picture of rhyme. You can tell, because he had glasses.

Pop it up. Pop it up. Put another one up. Fuck, fine. I'll find pictures of myself. Well, there's just two of them. You wore them for, like, the first 16 years of your life. So, okay.

Well, should we wrap it up? Probably. I'd say this was a great podcast. Mm-hmm. Good fun. Funny. Lots of depth in subjects. Dicks, balls.

Porn stars. Camaro. Camaros. It's an American dream. Evan threw up at one point. I was hoping you guys forgot about it. Bro. Yeah, things were electric. Anyway, all right. If you guys made it to this point in the podcast, thank you. And we're sorry.

Also, actually, no, seriously, though, comment down below questions. But I want, like, good questions, not just like, well, what's your favorite dirt bike brand? Like, comment some decent questions that actually have a little bit of depth to them. And then we could answer them. and I don't know I just noticed they do that on a lot of other podcasts and it is kind of interesting because I am curious you know if you have a question you should ask us now because we'd probably see it and if it's a good one we will answer it so good discussion topics correct more so but also like I don't know dude just like the situations they're in and how

would you suggest dealing with it um yeah if you weren't like I don't know I was listening to brad's part Brad Martin's podcast and he was talking like someone asked like if you weren't doing this what would you be doing um if you they were asking like pretty decent questions i don't know don't ask how big is evans dick yeah hey hey ask what would you do if you had a dick as big as evans hog sorry that's a good question we refer to it evans hog i can't wait to hear about my mom listening to this one i was actually that's wild because i was just about to ask you Does your mom listen to our podcast? I honestly don't know, but...

Probably not. I mean, she knows at least how to type C-Boys TV into YouTube, so could this pop up? It could. Especially when we title Your Face and it says, Evans' giant secret. I mean, it's fine. She made it.

You're right. She's totally going to know, actually. It's going to be Evans' massive secret. My parents, I think they stop listening to it. My dad said he's going to catch up on his, on his next long drive so hey dad i feel like my parents like this is just i don't want to know this stuff there is some things you just shouldn't know yeah makes it easier honestly honestly it does not that i really care but yeah i question if we should maybe be telling the entire world

some of these things yeah if we should hey evan shock on 60s and then talk about his dick for an hour yeah it was more so what a position it was more so just me and ben and ken arguing about it Can we just talk about Ken's balls for a second before we end this? No. I mean, they're huge. There's not a whole lot less. We do that true. Give them a little love here.

Let's talk them up a little bit. Big old tangerines and that orange sack. All right. Everyone subscribe. Like this on whatever you're listening. Jesus. Holy shit, this guy. Oh, dude.

What's going on? Hit this? No, he hit the entire thing. I just hit my Lord back right here. Sorry, dude. I didn't need to cause as much of a distress. All right, guys. We'll see you next time.

No, I don't feel so bad about breaking the table. Evan, you threw up.