Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler - Minisode: Switching Teams with Chelsea + Catherine

Episode Date: August 14, 2026

Chelsea and Catherine chat about labels and lesbians.  And a couple with wedding drama may be off the hook. * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Bell. Connection is everything. I survived nine months in captivity, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. Yeah, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you hear the new episode of the Hey Jonas podcast? We are at D23, so we'll see who stops by.

The cast of Frozen stopped by. Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, and Idina Menzel. I auditioned for Frozen. What? For Kristoff. They said, okay, what are you going to be singing today? I said, I don't know. That must have been why you didn't get it.

Oh, you probably won. Plus, John Stamos, Hayden Christensen from Star Wars, and more. And I guess I can share that, uh, no way. Listen to the latest episode of Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, guys, here are my dates for the High and Mighty Tour. In August, you can find me in Calgary. That's Canada.

And September, I will be in Santa Barbara, San Diego, New York City, Philly, and New Haven, Connecticut. October is Atlanta, Baltimore, Saginaw, Michigan, Pittsburgh, Toronto, Boise, Idaho, and Spokane. And then in November, I'll be in San Francisco. I'm coming to Salt Lake City, Austin, Houston, Dallas, babies. I'll be there. And then in December, I am closing out my tour in Denver and Vancouver. So get your tickets at chelseahandler.com for the High and Mighty Tour. Hello.

Hi, Chelsea. Oh, hi. Hello, Catherine. It's nice to see you today. Hi. Likewise. Likewise. I have an update.

Okay. This is from our Zosha Mamet episode. Zosha Mamet. It's Zosha. Is it? Oh, after all that, I'm still saying it wrong. I know. It doesn't seem like it should be

because we all said Zosha for so long. it's zasha zasha i just can't get anyone's names right at least it's like across the board you know right so no one feels singled out seriously it's kind of like pronouns that's how i feel about regular names so it's like i'm like how regular field people feel about pronouns i'm like i can't get your fucking name right to begin with so let's just forget it that's why that's why i'm here to set the record straight thank you this is from john he had written in and like his mom was unsupportive about his wedding to his husband so he was not sure whether to invite her so he says dear chelsea i ended up inviting my mother to the wedding and she responded a day after the

deadline of course during our conversation she made it clear that she was uncomfortable attending the wedding and tried to blame it on the tension between her and her brother my uncle although i appreciate her responding instead of ghosting i'm sensitive to bs and would have respected her more if she were honest about her feelings toward lgbtq relationships nonetheless i found myself less upset about her absence and ultimately chose to focus on the happiness of my soon-to-be husband current groomzilla and to give my energy to those who have supported our relationship and will be in attendance we're both excited to be tying the knot soon thank you both for taking the time to meet with me during a time of confusion and hurt it was greatly appreciated warmly john that's nice

I had an interesting conversation the other night at a dinner and yeah, we were talking about, you know, I was talking to two lesbians. Well, no, they're not lesbians. They're just like one woman had been, is with her partner who it's like the first woman she's ever been with and she'd only dated men before, but she, they're married now. They have two, they have twins. And she was talking about like, it was just such an interesting conversation because like in 20 years from now, like no one's going to have to come out.

Right. You know, it's like, oh, you're dating a boy this week or you're dating a girl this week or you only like girls or you only like boys. Like you don't have to come out and say anything because she was talking about how when she realized she was in love with her partner, a woman, she was like, okay, wait a second. What do I do here? I have to tackle lesbian sex. Like I've never done that. And that seems like a challenge. and then she goes and then I thought back to when I was a little girl and people told me that I was

gonna have to start giving blowjobs you know to guys and she goes and that was horrifying and then then you had to be good not only you were gonna be expected to do that but you were gonna be expected to be good at it right she goes that was awful and I learned how to do that and here I am again now having to relearn something and I'm like oh that's no problem I have actually already but I've already learned this like once and it was a pain in the ass and now so I was like oh that's such a great way of talking about it, you know? And also I was like, did you have to come out as a lesbian? She goes, that's what I was like thinking and contemplating. Like, do I have to come out as a lesbian? Because now I'm with a woman. It's like, she's just fluid. Yeah. Right.

Exactly. And like after a while we won't even be asking people those questions. Yeah. I think, you know, for a long time I consider myself queer, even though I'm married to a man, but I realized like more lately I'm like, I guess I'm pan because like, I don't know, my trans guys are very hot you know so I'm like it once you get past like the gender of it all all the whole gay straight stuff yeah I guess fluid is a reference more to your self-identity right rather than your sexual preference right yeah so I guess I hope it all goes out the window yeah now okay were they friends for a long time first uh they had built a friendship but not for a long extended period of time they met on a movie it's I'm reading this book um we're gonna

have this guest on it's called this is what happens when women read which is a great book about this evangelical christian woman uh juliana gloss and then she kind of renounces religion and she has all this she starts reading books basically like pluto and or pluto that's a planet she starts reading pluto and jupiter and saturn and she just she just gives herself a huge like Darwin she reads all these you know Socrates all of these like philosophers and Nietzsche and she's just starts questioning everything in her life of course and it's like wait why is there so much hate and I'm and then you know of course she ends up having sex with women too not only women she's actually having sex with men and women in this book where I am anyway but it's just so funny

Yeah, many people end up having sex with women that are women, and we're like, yeah. Once you get past the prerequisite of like, okay, girls date boys, and then you're just like, wait, no, there are no rules anymore, a lot of people open up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, our caller today is Jen, and she says, dear Chelsea, this is some wedding drama. I love wedding drama.

I genuinely can't tell if my husband and I are being reasonable millennials or selfish assholes. Here's the situation. My husband's aunt is getting married this summer in Belize over a holiday weekend. Important context, she was incredibly generous during our wedding in 2024. She helped pay for our invitations and gave us money to our wedding expenses. We're genuinely grateful for everything she did for us. Now, here's where I'm conflicted.

She is someone who loves to talk shit, lovingly but still, about big elaborate weddings, expensive parties, and over-the-top celebrations. So when she announced a destination wedding on a holiday, I had to laugh a little internally because, ma'am, the irony. My husband and I are millennials who just bought our first home last August with zero financial help from anyone. As you can imagine, buying a house in this economy has humbled us deeply. Every extra dollar seems to go toward something breaking, repairs, furniture, or just surviving homeownership. You know about that, Chelsea. My husband— I mean, I don't think we should compare my situation to anyone calling in.

That's not realistic. realistic. Just lots of expenses. I just don't want any more shit from anyone, okay? We'll just never bring it up again. Just like, if we don't talk about it, nothing bad will happen. Yeah. My husband originally wanted to go to her wedding because he feels guilty not showing up. But now that we've looked at logistics, the trip feels kind of insane. Flights are like $800 per person because of holiday, and somehow getting to Belize from New York is turning into a 28-hour travel experience with multiple layovers. We're talking expensive, exhausting, and honestly stressful so my question is are we wrong for not going are we wrong for not even trying to have my

husband go solo especially considering everything she did for us for our wedding and if we don't go what's the classy way to make up for it or are we supposed to suck it up swipe the credit card and show face because family obligation wins signed a guilty millennial jen hi hi jen hi you're so cute thank you you too i love all our listeners are so cute such a compliment to me he's calling and yeah I think you have to go to that wedding you think so yes this woman helped her with her own wedding and like I understand the expenses but is there anyone else you can team up with to share at least a house or something inexpensive like another couple or something that can help you save some costs so that was the plan but no one is going even her own daughters

aren't going because of how not only is it expensive Chelsea but like the flight together is 28 hours to belize belize from where from new york because the only day where there's a direct flight is on the day of her wedding on saturday no 28 hours yeah so her own daughters aren't going and we were gonna share a house initially to like cut the cost but once they told me that they weren't going we were like does she does she have you spoken to her I have not no okay what if let me just throw this out there what if you guys host a little like cake and ice cream homecoming party for them at your beautiful house when they get back well I mean that's okay but like you guys live in the same city she's moving she's moving back um to New York and where do you live you

live in New York I'm in New Jersey I'm a West Orange so that's right by my family I think you should be very honest with her first of all and just like if so you can't you don't have the option of flying direct is that right okay so you don't have the option of flying direct it's a 28 hour flight there three day weekend for a three-day weekend that's not yeah that's that in itself is a reason to not I didn't realize that part and then the cost I think you should call her though and talk to her. Just be like, you really wanted to make this happen because of everything she's done for you. And it's really important for you to, that you really wanted to be there, but you're finding it unmanageable. And maybe she's getting married in Belize because she doesn't fucking

want anybody to come. True. That's what I was thinking. That's what I was thinking. But I think just like front load it. Yeah. Don't like get, get ahead of it and just be really honest and upfront and tell her what the deal is and just say, is there any way we can celebrate when you come back? Like, don't get into all the, just don't get into all the financial issues, get into the flight duration. And also, you know, now that we're, we're not able to share a house with anybody, we're pretty strapped financially, even though we were going to just try to make it work even so, but it's just becoming obvious that it's not going to be manageable. And we wanted to just like touch base with you on this before and let you know, and just do that and see how her response

is. Hopefully she'll be really understanding. And if she's upset, then I think you should just go back to her and say like, let's figure out a way to make this, let's have a celebration for all the people that couldn't be there when you come home that you're, that you'd be willing to host in your new house. I do want to do something for her. I really, that's, that's a good idea. Cause I do want to do something for her. I feel bad. 28 hours of flying doesn't make any sense for anything really. I mean, unless you're going to for two weeks, 28 hours, like, no, that's not right. You're going to like Asia, right? Like, or like, I don't know, but no, for three days and also like over $5,000. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. I also think if she knew that you guys

needed a little help with your wedding, she probably knows, you know, that that might be too expensive. So I think Chelsea's exactly right. Like front load this talk to her. And also just As a reminder, when you're writing that email, send it in an email so she can read it a couple of times before she responds. If she does, if she does have like a reaction that's angry or mad or anything, but that usually calms people down. I think rereading stuff, but, and then you can write at the end, reread this twice before responding. No, you, but you can also say to her, acknowledge everything that she did, you know, for you guys at the top of the letter or within the body of the letter at some point, just acknowledge everything she's done

so that she doesn't, if she's the type of person that would want to respond with like, how could you, but do you know how she responded to her daughter's not coming? Um, I think one word like noted. Okay. So, so approach it a little bit more, you know, softly. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to acknowledge that her help. I want to acknowledge that she's been very, very nice to me since I started like dating my husband like she's been so nice so that's why i feel bad and i was trying to figure out like what can i do but i like the idea of writing something instead of like by the way just like give her some time yes absolutely yeah that's great okay thank you better okay good good all right take care thank you you too bye bye you lost me at fucking 28

hours can you imagine how many layovers don't spend the time they're yeah yeah no i agree behind every night spent making the kids lunches there's a lot of suspense will they finally eat the veggies will the pesto survive the first bite will the lunchbox come home empty half full or come home at all and will you finish episode eight before you're done slicing the cucumbers Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave, Netflix, and Disney Plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for details and to check availability. Bell. Connection is everything.

When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and held captive for nine months. I survived, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up, without a doubt, he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed,

and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home.

This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo, and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table it's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters

and that is a trojan horse whether you're looking for literary deep dives smart pop culture conversations or a community of readers who love to think a little too much you're in the right place listen to pro society on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. On the new podcast Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone,

I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip i hope you listen to solita on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts i bought new earrings with my sissies we went to sedona for the weekend and i bought these pretty earrings thank you they go all the way up my ears though so like i don't think i can sleep in them which is why i have earrings like light earrings so i can always

sleep in them because it's like i'm just gonna lose these do they have a flat back in case you yeah i do oh that's nice yeah i do i need to just get earrings tattooed into my ears that's my new thing tattoos after i got my eyebrows tattooed i'm like all right what else can i fucking tattoo yeah exactly would you get like a tattoo tattoo no i don't care about tattoos but my niece just got one seneca i found out my sister told us she got one of the three girls when we went to africa the three nieces they got there's a picture of them like kind of dancing and she got that which That's really cute. Oh, I like that. I like it when they have like a really nice meaning or cousins. Yeah, I love that. That's really sweet. Well, our last little question for today is from

Sarah. She says, I started talking with a guy on Hinge who has long term relationship on his profile. After chatting, it seems like he's really only interested in hooking up and essentially admitted as much to me. He said he only puts long term relationship on his profile to up his chances of meeting up with someone to be honest I had been interested in just hooking up with him but the bait and switch has me leery should I meet up with him and see if we have chemistry or skip it and move on Sarah I always think that's a bad you know if you're not representing yourself fully and honestly I would stay away from that person yeah the bait and switch gives me the I don't like back and forth with when there's when there's relationship drama I don't at this stage in my

life I don't have time for that yeah if there's like a lot of back and forth and like you're saying one thing and you're doing another then you get like two tries right and that's it and and I think for that like yeah if you want to hook up with him and you're yeah I don't respect that and actually you know what as a woman just for the other women that he comes into contact with like it would be because it could go either way he could all of a sudden be like oh I'm never telling them that I'm only into hooking up or he could be even more honest on his profile so that he's not catching women that are looking for something more that's the thing is like there are plenty of women who are just interested i'm one of them i'm one of those people hello she's

right here um so just put that on your profile okay sarah so i think we're saying skip it skip it yeah skip there are plenty of men act honestly then we can reward them when they're dishonest and what's the point then you're just setting up a pattern of behavior where they're dishonest and they get away with that you know what we need we need an app where women can like reverse yes report them and like search by their photos well i put up my first batch of straight women on my little series my dating series on instagram this week so i'm waiting to hear because i was very loathe to do that because of the way men behave you know and because i don't know how you know how many straight male followers i actually have so i wanted to like see how they act with you know

with that and so i'm waiting to hear some feedback from these women to see what kind of men have approached them and if they're being respectful because i there's so many straight women in my DMs that I really want to like help them find men. But I don't know. I'm definitely the place to find women and straight, straight women, gay women and gay men. Yeah, I don't know if I'm the place to find straight men. Right? All right. Well, that's all we got for this. Okay. Bye bye. Bye bye. If you want advice from Chelsea, write into Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail.com. Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartMedia. Follow Chelsea on all socials at Chelsea Handler and find Catherine on TikTok at FlashCadabra.

Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert, executive producer Catherine Law. Find full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix and get tickets to see Chelsea live at ChelseaHandler.com. I survived nine months in captivity and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you hear the new

episode of the hey jonas podcast we are at d23 so we'll see who stops by the cast of frozen stopped by kristin bell josh gad and adina menzel i auditioned for frozen what for kristoff they said okay what are you going to be singing today i said i don't know that must have been why you didn't get it oh you probably want plus john stamos hayden christiansen from star wars and more and i guess i can share that uh no way listen to the latest episode of hey jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle.

I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita trading the pity for possibility listen to solita on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts this is an iheart podcast guaranteed human