Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler - Minisode: Toffee Pudding with Rosebud Baker and Andy Haynes

Episode Date: September 20, 2024

Rosebud Baker and Andy Haynes are in-studio with Chelsea to talk about why men buy too many gadgets, baby poop, and how to use toffee pudding in bed. * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. There's no shortcut for saving time, but saving money is simple. Just combine your car and home insurance with Bel Air Direct and save. Get a quote at BelAirDirect.com. I survived nine months in captivity, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are the Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive.

Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. if your bookshelf and your for you page are equally important to your personality

welcome home pro society is a weekly podcast that's part book club part group chat for anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse each week we're connecting the dots between books the internet and pop culture with your favorite writers book talk creators and plenty of overthought opinions yeah i'm obsessed i'm us. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Hoda Kotb, host of the podcast Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb. You know, I'm always searching for inspiration and useful tools to maximize joy. Like when my friend Henry Winkler offered advice to aspiring actors and really anybody hoping to stand out. You're not hired just to fill time and

space. You're hired to fill the space with you. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome back to Couples Counseling with Chelsea. I am here with my friends Rosebud Baker and her husband, Andy Haynes. Hi, Rosebud and Andy. Thank you for being here today as a couple. Thank you. Thank you for having us because we haven't been to couples therapy in a few weeks. Okay, great. That's why I would like to fill in the void however i can great i know that you guys have had a lot you have a long history together right can you break that down for our listeners give us kind of like a summary sure when you first became sexually attracted to andy yes so i so the first time i met andy was at our friend's wedding

it was not the first time that i met you but it was the first time that we like hung out and i wouldn't describe it as like a strong burning sexual attraction i would say i enjoyed being around him because he made me laugh yeah and that to me is sexually attractive do you know what i'm saying but it wasn't like oh this guy's gonna wreck me or something like that historically women have not been sexually attracted to me it's a more of a breaking them down kind of process right and that's where you had to come in with the humor right yes exactly to develop the humor because the humor is a much more powerful aphrodisiac than looks anyway right for relationships And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the way that you look.

I just want to acknowledge that we're all sitting here together. We're just starting there. Yeah. There's nothing wrong with how you look, Andy. Thanks so much. So I remember, if I recall correctly, you guys kind of like left that party together, didn't you? And you kind of spent the next, what, four or five hours together? Yeah, we took a drive together.

And then Andy tried to come upstairs and I was like, ew, no. And then like three days later, I was like, actually, maybe. And then we hung out. We slept together once. And basically, he moved into my apartment. Oh, wow. Yeah. It was like very impulsive, alcoholic vibes.

But you weren't drinking at that time, were you? No, no. No, we'd both been sober for a while. We both been sober, but we're still a mess. But you got to find your highs where you can get them, you know? Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And when you're both sober, isn't there a rule that you shouldn't be dating?

There's no rules for us. It's like we've been sober long enough. So that wasn't a part of the attraction was that he was sober. It was part of it. Yeah. Because it was like, oh, we have like a similar language. There's like a he works on himself, that kind of a thing where I was like, oh, he's in therapy. He's sober.

I was attracted to both of those things. He's funny. And also he's like as impulsive and down for whatever as I am. So that automatically was like, oh, he's so easy to be around. I'm so excited to be around this person. We had so much fun. and then we got engaged like nine months later uh-huh i think six six months later yeah i'm pretty sure yeah we hooked up for the first time like in october and we were engaged

your birthday yeah okay so yeah we got engaged five months and were you when you started dating rosebud were you like this is it this is the woman for me it was weird it was like uh i was like had been freshly single for the first time in a long time where i wasn't being a compulsive monogamist and then i thought you were just gonna say you had like a sex addiction i was like no no that's also a surprise i would if i had better odds but uh you have to consent uh yeah and you can't you you have to be more than funny to have a sex addiction you can't just use your humor yeah because i'm also very fickle it's a bad combination uh but i met her and we hit it off and i was like kind of like oh i'm not going to get in a relationship and then things moved really

fast and not to spill the tea but rosebud said i love you first yeah and she said i think while we were having sex while we're having sex i know does it count when you say that while you're having sex because it's like everyone's impulse is when she stopped and she said i think i love you and then continued to have sex i think we were done but we were you know post-coital post-coital yeah so someone had climaxed yeah and i'm guessing that was you not rosebud i'm i'm a pretty generous lover i would say i was raised by women uh not that that were you sleeping with those women yeah he's going down on his mom i had to go down on my mom a lot no but i just i never was one of those guys i mean i've definitely not pleased a woman let's okay let's get that out there but i

think i'm a pretty reciprocal lover you know i mean there's no shortcut for saving time but saving money is simple just combine your car and home insurance with bel air direct and save Get a quote at fellerdirect.com. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and held captive for nine months. I survived, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. every week i'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable i knew if he woke up without a doubt

he was going to hurt me i started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and i just started screaming they are abducted stalked controlled and nearly silenced but these aren't stories about what's taken from them they're stories about what it takes to make it out alive Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo, and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed.

From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table. It's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse. Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B.

I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people, and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip, I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I'm Hoda Kotb, host of the podcast Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb. If you know me, you know I'm always searching for inspiration and useful tools to maximize joy. So this podcast lets us uncover those things together through meaningful conversations with fascinating people. Like when my friend Henry Winkler offered advice to aspiring actors and really anybody hoping to stand out. You're not hired just to fill time and space. You're hired to fill the space with you. You have something in your guts. You go with it.

And Shawn Johnson recalled the moment she realized her now husband, Andrew, was the one. He was just so unapologetically himself and knew nothing of Hollywood. He hadn't been on a plane before without his family. It was so pure. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. this is a little off piste but i was just watching this like new show that's coming out on stars because i was interviewing the author and there was a blow job scene where one of the girls betty

gilpin she plays one of the girls it's called three women by lisa tadeo they made it a tv show and she's having an affair with a guy and she gives a blow job in the back seat with like a toffee pudding she got a to go toffee pudding poured it over his penis and was sucking on it And I was like, this is going to be such inspiration for so many women and men when they see this. It's not really doing much for me. Well, you have to see it. And then you have to think about how wonderful that's going to be for your sexual partner, because I'm not even in a serious relationship. And I was like, I can't wait to do this to someone.

Wow. Because it just seems so pleasure giving. So I just want to throw that out there. That just hit me. I mean, I'm not ordering, you know, you to do it. I'm just maybe you are giving him ideas. I'm giving you guys ideas. Which I don't appreciate.

And you could possibly flip it and reverse it and use it on her so that she doesn't even have to do it. That seems like an unhealthy. That's going to be a huge objection. Yeah, that seems like an issue. I don't know. I saw it and I was like, this needs, like, this is good. Whoever thought this up. Like, I just thought this was going to be helpful for so many couples that have hit.

Not that you guys have hit a stale place in your relationship. I mean, we just had a kid. So that's a, you hit a wall for sure. Okay, what's that? What's the wall? What is that? what is the wall that you hit you just you become like kind of like farm hands in your own home and you just sort of are like you're just like doing tasks all day and then by the time you're done

you're both just like oh my god like the most sexual thing you can think of is lying in bed without anyone touching you yeah because truly there's just someone pulling your hair out all day yeah i think i got like rosebud went through so much like her body changed so much and then she had to literally get her organs moved around to get the baby out and i was kind of like i don't think she wants anybody touching her for a while and so i kind of took that as my my guiding principles for the first i don't know four months yeah it was about four months before i was ready to like let's let's get into it let's get the party started again well that's very respectful and necessary for men to actually understand

what happens to a woman's body and her insides. Because yeah, anyone who has a baby isn't horny. Right. Who has just had a baby. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I guess there's women that are, but I'm like, I- But are there?

I'm just like, if they are, I wish they'd keep it to themselves. That's right. Because it's a downer. And it's not fair to give men that kind of idea. Yes. Right? Yes, exactly.

I do kind of wish I was the kind of man that didn't care. You know what I mean? I think I would like to be he has this like um alpha fantasy yeah yeah where I would like you know I work on wall street and I check in with her once in a while about her days and then I right cheat on her with someone yeah but he doesn't listen to anything I say he wants to be that man but he's not well you guys have different even though you have a lot in common you have different personality types very you like to plan shit and you don't want anything to do with planning no I don't want to I don't either I don't neurologically opposed to I don't like

any logistical talk yes I don't want to look on a map and I don't want to plan where we're going I just want you to tell me where to be and then I'll bring a fucking funny personality or whatever it'll be upbeat yeah no I'll bring the party and you can bring the map yeah that's how I feel but is this a point of contention ever like does it ever escalate into a fight because your planning becomes so annoying to her well the problem is is that Rosebud doesn't plan anything and then You know, I have an entire life over here on Wall Street. Yeah, I work at the Patriot Center and the head of Forex there. But no, I mean, like, you know, we have different schedules and then like I'll try to do something where it's like, hey, would you like to do something as married people?

And she I have to coordinate that because her schedule is so busy and she gets so annoyed by just the asking of it to where I'm like, all right, I'm not going to plan anything anymore. Yeah. And then. And then I'm like, why aren't we going on dates? Yeah. Yeah, it does. It bothers me. I wish I wasn't like this.

I do try to like take a deep breath now. To get so easily irritated by the active planning. Because I do get really irritated. I know exactly what you mean. Not even, it doesn't even make sense. It's not even at him. It's like anyone in my life that asks me like, hey, what do you have this weekend of this month in this year?

And I just immediately shut down. I'm like, I don't even want to talk to you anymore. I agree. I don't like when people ask me in advance for things. It's like, who fucking knows? I could be dead by then, you know, to hit me back on Tuesday, hit me back on the Tuesday before the Wednesday and I'll let you know. Right.

I could be in the hospital. So with those things, can't you just go into her calendar and schedule a dinner and put it in there? Sometimes, but it's not always there, but I'm more like, I want to do something for a week in the summer. You know what I mean? Like that, like, and I know that Rosebud's going to fill the entire calendar with work if she can.

So I have to be like, can we do this? and she usually now will go like okay i'm not gonna do anything for these two weeks or something like that and so that's my that was kind of like your christmas trip that you had planned for rosebud's birthday that she canceled which was for you because you like skiing yeah you guys were coming and then she pulled out and was like no no i don't like these plans for you yeah yeah yeah yeah that was true that was actually a rare occasion though where andy was like oh we can cancel he was he was disappointed but he wasn't like i could tell he was as overwhelmed as i was well traveling with the baby is fucking overwhelming absolutely i mean

we had done it all summer and i was like we went from being like the most dignified people in the airport to being just everything on our backs like like squatting in a corner feeding her like it was just it was crazy to me how the stuff that i used to judge parents for in the airport i was like oh this is an unavoidable reality of just like moving around with a baby yeah and i was like this is i told myself i will never i would be pregnant i was like seven months pregnant walking by these women being like not me and it fully was it was just disgusting i was like because i love whistler that's what the first place i ever skied when i was two years old so i was super excited and then the idea of getting on the plane with the

baby, I was like, I don't ever need to travel again. Yeah. Yeah. I think it beat us down. And that's all for this week with Rosebud and Andy. Tune in next time as we continue couples counseling with Chelsea. You can check out Rosebud and Andy's podcast. It's called Find Your Beach. Andy will be on tour in Dallas, Oklahoma City and Tulsa in September, Amsterdam on October 25th. And then he has two dates in Milwaukee in December. So check out is Instagram and TikTok at I'mAndyHaynes, H-A-Y-N-E-S, for tickets to those dates and for more. And you can find both Andy and Rosebud on YouTube. Rosebud will be taping her new special on September 16th in New York at the Village Underground, and you can get tickets to this

and more of her dates at RosebudBaker.com. And you can find her on Instagram and TikTok at RosebudBaker. Upcoming shows that I have, I'm coming to Texas, I'm coming to St. Louis in Kansas City and then I will be in Las Vegas performing at the Chelsea Theater inside the Cosmopolitan Hotel. I'm coming to Brooklyn, New York at the King's Theater on November 8th and I have tickets on sale throughout the end of the year in December. So if you're in a city like Philadelphia or Bethlehem or San Diego or New Orleans or Omaha, check chelseahandler.com for tickets. Okay. I survived nine months in captivity and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive

what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are The Survivor Files. Every week I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home.

Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet,

and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. Yeah, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Hoda Kotb, host of the podcast Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb.

You know, I'm always searching for inspiration and useful tools to maximize joy. Like when my friend Henry Winkler offered advice to aspiring actors and really anybody hoping to stand out. You're not hired just to fill time and space. You're hired to fill the space with you. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotb on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Our hometown is not a test tube. 90 miles northeast of Nashville, a battle for the future of America plays out in one small town. Developers with right-wing ties have purchased hundreds of acres of land.

We need cities on a shining hill. This is Our Town, a podcast about what happens when a small town becomes the site of a social experiment and fights back. Guess you didn't move in on a bunch of dumb hillbillies now, did you? Listen to Our Town on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. Thank you.