Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler - Mothers Part 1

Episode Date: May 6, 2021

In this two-part debut episode of their brand new advice podcast, Chelsea and co-host Brandon Marlo take some roads-less-traveled in discussions about motherhood.  An adopted 33 year old struggles to manage his relationship with his biological mother. The daughter of a narcissist seeks advice on navigating that psychology. And Brandon shares the letter he recently sent to the judge in his own mother’s drunk driving case asking for the maximum punishment. The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees. This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave, Netflix, and Disney Plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for details and to check availability. Bell. Connection is everything. I survived nine months in captivity, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors

who lived through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality,

welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the Internet and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators and plenty of overthought opinions. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you hear the new episode of the Hey Jonas podcast? We are at D23, so we'll see who stops by. The cast of Frozen stopped by.

Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, and Idina Menzel. I auditioned for Frozen. What? For Kristoff. They said, okay, what are you going to be singing today? I said, I don't know. That must have been why you didn't get it. Well, you probably won.

Plus, John Stamos, Hayden Christensen from Star Wars, and more. And I guess I can share that, uh... No way. Listen to the latest episode of Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport and Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook. Each week, we talk to someone in show business and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us.

Everyone has a good time and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show. We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman, Adam Scott, Danny McBride, Ben Stiller, and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. hi this is chelsea handler welcome to dear chelsea this is a podcast where i am giving out solicited advice and sometimes unsolicited and sometimes unsolicited we all know that i can do that part with no problem whatsoever unsolicited advice seems to be my specialty um but i actually do really enjoy giving advice to people and i am very delighted also to bring to the fore

my assistant Brandon, because not only does Brandon lighten up my life, he lightens up everyone who's in my life, their life as well. He is able to just like bring sunshine. People want to FaceTime with Brandon. My family misses Brandon. Like everybody loves Brandon and he needs to be shared with the world. So I was so nice. Yeah, I know. I know. That's probably the first time you're hearing me say any of that. You must be blushing. I probably am. But you're not. I'm looking at you and you're actually not blushing so that's weird but anyway we have given not only advice to each other on several occasions you've helped me when i was going through therapy and constantly like i'm still grappling with not being a fucking cunt all the time yes i'm on a cunt loop

you know there's a period of time where i'm like completely grounded and understanding that i have to be nice compassionate empathetic and then there's another period of time where i'm so sick of doing that right there's a peak yes there's a peak and a valley yeah anyway you've always been very good at helping me when I've been struggling with, you know, how to handle my emotions, my emotional roller coasters, things like that. And also we've given advice together with lots of friends. You know, a lot of my friends come to me when they're in crisis. And I, for some reason, I'm very drawn to being able to fix a crisis. That's my personality type. I've accepted it. I no longer reject it, but I know that I'm good in a crisis. And sometimes when I have overflow

with Patience, you have taken on some of my friends who need help and support. Yes, you've contracted me in on a few of your projects. Yes, and you've been doing well. Thank you. Yeah, you have an active case in Canada right now. So how's that going? Well, I'm going to have to report back because I've not had a status update in a little while, which is concerning.

So I'm going to check in today, actually. This is a good girlfriend of mine who was having trouble with her teenage son, and I enlisted Brandon to talk to her because Brandon was also... I was a troubled youth. Yeah, I was a troubled youth, too. I was pregnant twice by the time I was 15. So I was no walk in the park for my fucking parents. Which is why I think the perspective that we're able to give on some of these is interesting because we're not actually living some of these cases, whether it be with marriage or kids or certain types of relationships.

So we can give an objective perspective. Yeah, I agree with that. I agree with the fact that because neither of us have children, we can give objective feedback about how your children are behaving and your relationship with them. Because all we do is see people with children. I've seen so many different kinds of parenting in my life So I do feel like I have an idea about giving advice on the subject matter Which will come in handy So we're going to do all sorts of different types of Mother's Day write-ins today

So some that need a perspective on being a mother Some that have issues with their mother And you're wearing a fuck you necklace on this recording day Is that for any reason in particular? No, that just is how I was feeling this morning when I woke up But it has no regard to how I feel about Mother's Day which is, I would say, my mom is dead. Your mom is a hot mess.

She is. I always say that she, when we frame it that way, I like to say that my mother is a mix between Martha Stewart and Anna Nicole Smith because she's very beautiful and she's very domestic, but she's messy. She's messy because she has, like, a drinking problem? Yeah, she's got, yeah, she's just got problems. She's got a variety of them and they don't coincide well together. Right. They don't live well together.

My mother was really sweet, really nice, really the opposite of me. She was very much not outgoing, very introverted, quiet, but had like a kind of sarcastic undertone. And she was never into alcohol or anything like that. She was like a total homebody mama bear, like snuggly. Like you wanted to come home, snuggle her, and then she would give you a Snickers bar. Well, and she passed about a decade ago, right? Don't say passed like that. I always find that so...

Well, she did. Yeah, she passed away. She passed away. Not passed. That's like saying somebody crossed over. Maybe she did. Get Laurel and Jackson on the phone. We need to find out.

I fucking hope she did because I talk to my mother every morning in meditation. I'm like, okay, I summon my mother and I pretend like that she's with me. I actually, I have to say, with meditation and therapy and all that stuff, now that my mother is dead, I feel closer to her than I did when she was alive. But was that immediate or as time has gone on, you felt like you've gotten closer? Most recently, like after, you know, learning all the stuff I learned about like energy and that no one's ever really gone. They just transform into something else like a leaf, like a leaf or... There's Rita just blowing around outside.

Or a rattlesnake, yeah. But yeah, so Mother's Day, the topic of Mother's Day was always something that you just did out of respect to mothers, right? And that's a necessary tradition that should keep going. But there are different types of mothers in our lives is something else that I've come to realize as you get older. Some people play a motherly role even though they're not your mother or can give you that sort of insight or perspective or nurturing that you need. And so you just have to appreciate all the women in your lives for the mothering that they do. Yeah, yeah. And there's a lot of people that remind me like of my own mom, you know, that I'm drawn to that aren't mothers in my life, but they have that same energy, you know.

What was your favorite thing about your mom? My mom was just a snuggle fest. Like, you just wanted to, like, roll up in a ball and, like, watch TV with her. And she'd, like, tickle the bottom of your feet. And she was all about food. So that's why I have, like, you know, she would make macaroni and cheese, like, the really good cheesy kind at, like, 3 when we would get home from school. At that point, I was the youngest, so I was only in one group. Like a Belvita?

Yeah. Well, basically, yeah. Something of that magnitude of cheese. And it would be home at 3 o'clock in the afternoon, like, and I assumed that was a snack, you know, so I would eat that every day. And then, like, I wonder why I have fucking, you know, issues with food. It's because my mother was feeding me like I was, like, we just came out of a war. Was that her love language? Yes.

Okay. Yeah. Whatever that means, Brandon, I'm assuming that was, yes. I mean, love language, I can only assume what that means. Well, you know what's interesting is the way you describe your mother, you describe your dogs. That you want a dog who wants to cuddle you all the time. And just as a little ball that you can curl up into. It wouldn't be any surprise to me if my mother was Bert.

Like, I wouldn't be any surprise. Or no, she'd be Bernice because Bernice gives me the finger all the time. My mom had that kind of wicked sense of humor where she would come back as a dog just to ignore me. Your mom must be spirit hopping because at one point it was chunks. Spirit hopping. I mean, she's just like going from dog to dog just as one goes. She's like, okay, I'm going to pop on into this one. Yeah, yeah.

But that's something my mother would do is would come back as a dog and then just be an asshole to me. Once I moved to L.A., I was really young. I was like 19 or 20. And I moved to L.A., and if I didn't call her, like, every other day or whatever it was, every third day, she would call me until I called her back. And this was before cell phones, like, were everywhere. You know, you had one, but, like, I would never answer my cell phone for a moment. So she kept calling my landline. So one morning it started ringing at 4 a.m.

I ignored it at 5 a.m., and then I answered it, and she was like, this is what happens when you don't call your mother, and then hung up on me. So she woke me up at, like, those times. So that was her sense of humor. That's funny. Like, yeah, just like, I'm a little bit of a bitch, but I'm not too much of a bitch. But she was sharp. Everyone in your family seems to have that gene. Were there quick?

Oh, yeah. Well, that's nice. I mean, I'm glad that they would probably love to hear you say that. Everyone's pretty quick, but everyone's very sarcastic. So quick isn't, you know, the word. Everyone's just a little bit, like, subversive. Do you have a favorite memory of your mom? it would involve food probably martha's vineyard being on the beach with her because she would

never come to the beach my mom like never did any of the things that a mother did she never went to my school conferences on my like ninth birthday she never came to pick me up from school she said i was like hey it's my birthday i want you to take me to lunch school literally was down the street i wrote the letter for her she signed it that's how i like operated on my whole childhood until i started just forging both of their signatures because i was like these two are fucking dead weight like my parents were dead weight so I wrote this I'm like please excuse Chelsea it's her birthday I'm taking her to lunch no one shows my mother never shows and I walk home I'm fuming so I have to go back to class I have not gotten out to lunch on my birthday I'm so pissed you know

I'm nine years old so it's everything I walk home I storm in and I just remember fucking going off on my mother like how could you leave me on my birthday how could you fucking do that do you understand all i ask of you is to do one thing and that's to pick me up and she's like sweetie i was picking you up i picked you up and she picked me up but she never came into the school to sign me out like she just sat at this parking lot that i come out to at the end of the day you know on the day she did decide to pick me up and she didn't even understand that you had to go in and sign your child out like she didn't understand any of the mechanics and i just couldn't be bothered no no she couldn't and she was tired all the time so she must have been depressed now in retrospect

respect. All signs lead. I mean, being married to my father could not have been uplifting. You have two sisters. Which of you three has more of your mom? My sister Shoshana, for sure. But that's enough about my mother. Let's talk about your mother so you can bring people up to speed on the kind of situation you're dealing with. So your mother's been divorced. Yeah, like six times. Okay. Why don't you start with that? By the way, mom, if you're listening, Nice to meet you? No, I've met her before over the phone, I think.

Have you? Oh, I don't know. Anyway. Yeah, so she's just, in that regard, yeah, she's been married six times. And the one thing, I try and keep a positive outlook on most aspects of my mother's life. And in that regard, I say that, you know, she never stopped looking for love. And I think that most people become jaded by that if they don't find it the first, second, or third time. But no, no, no, not her.

She's not going to stop until she finds it. that's that's an optimistic way of looking at it so yeah she's just a woman with some issues how was she growing up what kind of mother was she when you were growing up again it was super high or super low she was like you know from an outside perspective she had it all together and she's so pretty and she could do she was like barbie as well so she's done everything she was yeah you showed me a picture of her she's yeah yeah she was the woman at lancome who went around the U.S. And like this is when department store makeup artists were it. Like if you were one of those, you had your face on posters that you were coming in. She was a projects manager for a

chemical engineering company. She owned her own bakery. Like she's done everything. So I always thought of her as like a real life Barbie. There was nothing she couldn't do. And she was a single mom with four kids. And, you know, that caused issues of its own. But she always worked like three jobs to take care of us. So I have a tender spot for any woman who I see going through something is I know that all of those people are just one bad decision away from being homeless, basically. So I try and be as empathetic as possible, even to my mother, who I have no contact with because she's just. Well, that's not true. You don't have no contact with her. You did call the police on her in her local city to let them know that she was drinking and driving

and gave them her license plate number. So I would say that's a not direct contact, but that's that's an indirect contact. And I, I, I like your style. I think that's fucking awesome. Listen, we have to, sometimes we end up parenting our parents and that's okay. Yeah. We have to hold people accountable. Right. I think that's true. I think a lot of people parent their parents. I didn't really do that. I don't think, I mean, I'm the youngest of six kids, so I didn't have to parent my parents, but I definitely see you parenting your mom. And I mean, just because it's not me, I find it hilarious. Like I find it hilarious that your mother has to be like that you freeze her out and that you don't talk to her when she misbehaves

and that you're not willing to fuck around I think it's really funny no I don't fuck around I can't I mean at this juncture I'm 32 years old like I'm not gonna put up with that sort of behavior and this is one of those situations in life that as you get older if you do and I'm assuming a lot of people who are going to listen to this have that dynamic with their parents those are relationships you want. Those are not relationships you need. So once you make that distinction, things become much easier. Yeah. I mean, you say that a lot. You say those are relationships you want versus relationships you need, like a parent-child relationship. But a lot of people think that you need that. They don't understand that you can divorce your parent or your son

and they don't have an ability to do it. Well, everyone has the ability to do it because I've I was so codependent for so long. I mean, we were in cahoots. But then once you just make that decision, like, what is this relationship adding to my life? If it's positive, great. And if it's not, then you have to make an adjustment. And when you do, you feel so much more powerful in that relationship. Yeah, yeah.

That you're not beholden, you know? Yeah. I think we should take a quick break and then we'll come back. And do you want to start taking some collars? Yes, I would love to. We'll be right back. get bell pure fiber internet with crave netflix and disney plus from 94 a month price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit visit bell.ca for details

and to check availability bell connection is everything when i was 14 years old i was kidnapped and held captive for nine months i survived and i've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them i'm elizabeth smart and these are the survivor files i just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up don't say anything every week i'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable i knew if he woke up without a doubt he was going to hurt me i started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and i just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive.

Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm gonna have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. From best-selling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments nothing is off the

table it's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters and that is a trojan horse whether you're looking for literary deep dives smart pop culture conversations or a community of readers who love to think a little too much you're in the right place listen to pro society on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts see you between the pages On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B.

I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself.

So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip, I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport. And Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook on the Big Money Players Network. Our show is extremely accessible to first-time listeners. Each week, we talk to someone in show business, a.k.a. the biz,

and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. Everyone has a good time, and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show. We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman. Not that great. actually can you help me can you help me shape this how about we flip it on his head right how about we flip the script okay what is the surprise woman who actually you think is the straight man is actually the one who's acting weird adam scott this entire time you've been expecting adam sandler to come to visit the show i i would never let go of that i have i would never set

expectations for something like that if the universe allows for something like that to happen i'm open to it i'm always going to accept you know danny mcbride fine yeah it's all this fragile masculinity exuding i could smell it walking down the hallway to be honest with you i was like is that weed nope it's fragile masculinity ben stiller no because a lot of times in out of context people don't get it or even know what a circle is you know what i mean like they're like oh what's the state everyone's so dumb except for you fake right fake and and also not interested or just like oh i've got my life i don't care about your life and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us oh and by the way will ferrell told

us personally he loves the show and he wants to be a guest on every episode but he's just so busy listen to hollywood handbook on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts so our first submission comes from billy who is from minneapolis i like the way you you get you get very excited when you talk about submissions i like that you take it seriously you better hang on because we've got quite a few today okay well i think you better hang on i better okay so his name is billy he's 33 and he's from minneapolis and he writes dear chelsea i was raised an only and adopted child by my parents who are not able to conceive my whole life has been based on my ability to be the perfect offspring. At 33 years old, I still carry some of that baggage and feel

like a failure. Being adopted is a blessing and a curse. You feel wanted, but you need to deliver. My parents wanted me to be an evangelical symbol of heterosexuality, but I ended up being a godless homo. Even when you're wanted, you still seek more. I met my birth mother when I was 18. I soon found out that she married my birth father and had three more children after putting me up for adoption. How do you move forward from an event like that and successfully seek and identify your core beliefs seeking identity has been an ongoing issue for many years and i'm hoping you can provide some insight on how you have built yours in the past few years there have been multiple deaths within the family including my adoptive father now it's just me and my adoptive

mother i want to move forward with my life in a different part of the country but i know it will kill her she's the only family i have left and i need to develop myself somewhere else any thoughts would be appreciated billy oh my god that is just so many things well there's a lot going on there, but he's on the phone. So I think that we should get a little additional insight on the phone with him. Billy. Hi, how are you? Hi. Thank you for your letter. I mean, that is a lot to handle. Yes. Yes, it is. But that's life, right? Well, yeah, because there's a lot to say here. Like, you know, instinctively, I would always tell everybody to just like reach for their dreams and go for it and take a huge risk in life, which would be moving away. But then you say your

adoptive mother is a widow and she's there alone and you're all she has. So there's a sense of responsibility along with that. And is there any chance of your adoptive mother, we're going to get to all of this stuff that's in the letter, but is there any chance that your adoptive mother would be willing to relocate with you? Not like live together, but relocate together so that you're not separating? I don't think so. Cause her roots are pretty deep in that area just because that's where she lived with my dad for so long. But I think overall, just because she and I have had a very tight knit relationship for a long time. And I think honestly, moving away would be the best for both of us. Okay, well, then that seems like you already have the answer to that

question. If you know that intellectually, then all you have to do is just kind of bite the bullet. And it seems like you know, you don't have to go where does she live? She lives about an hour and 20 minutes away from where I live in Minneapolis. Okay, so you're thinking about leaving Minneapolis and going somewhere even farther? Yep, all the way up to Maine. Maine, uh-huh. Okay, well, I think you deserve to do

whatever you wanna do with your life. You know, if you really wanna take a leap of faith and try something new, I really, in my heart of hearts, don't think you'll ever regret making a move like that. You know, it might test your relationship or it might make you closer with your mother because you haven't been apart and so there's a lot of codependency there.

And then let's get back to this adoptive stuff about you and your adoptive parents and them having three more children together. That must feel like it's very, very personal. all? Yes. My birth mother got pregnant when she was 19. She was broken up with my birth father at the time, did not tell him that she was pregnant and ended up having me, giving me up for adoption and not telling him for 18 years. Okay. Well then there you go with the explanation for that reasoning. You know what I mean? So are you able to excise yourself from the idea that you were rejected? Because are you past that? Or is that something you're struggling with? It comes and goes. I mean, I met them when I was 18. So it's been a few years. And so there's been a lot of processing through it. Some days are good, some days are bad. But I mean,

it's one of those things that you go back to and you think over a little bit too hard. But then at the end of the day, it's like, I would not have the life that I have right now if it wasn't for that action that she did. And so there's just the acceptance piece. Yeah, absolutely. And I, what, go ahead, Brandon. And do you still have communication with your biological parents now?

Not for maybe a couple of years now. My birth mother has a very severe mental illness challenge and it's just not- Well, there you go. You dodged another bullet by not being raised by her. So there you go. Yeah, exactly. But I would urge you to really understand the value

that you have just by being here. Like you're not here by accident. People go back to negative narratives like, Oh God, well, why did my parents do that? Why, why didn't she tell him for 18 years? Maybe my life would have been different. Like your life isn't different. And the only way to capitalize on what you're going through right now is to be grateful and to accept it and to do what's in your best interest for you to thrive as a person and not to be depending on any of these people in your life right right completely agree well and you know between going to school and i'm an alcohol and drug counselor as well oh i thought you were gonna say i'm an alcoholic i'm like no shit i would be too no not for the moment um yeah but i every day i talk to clients about what it's

like to or asking them to search for their own identity as well and i was actually just looking at my own life being like you know what i haven't been really walking this walk either and so you know, identity is based on our experiences and lessons learned through adverse experiences. Right. And so that's why I just wanted to pick your brain on it, because it's something you can't ignore forever. Yeah. And your identity isn't based on your birth mother or your adoptive mother or your adoptive father. Your identity is based on how you handle your life situation, on what you do with your life. Moving far, like taking a leap of faith and moving to Maine And taking that risk is going to reap probably a lot of happiness in your life, I would surmise.

Brandon, what do you have to say on the matter? I agree. I think that I'm also a gay man and have a very complicated relationship with my mother. And I think that the amount of insight you'll receive from removing yourself from that daily habit with her and starting a life for yourself somewhere, that then you're kind of forced to communicate in a different way and leverage your time together when you have it versus Is it just being such a consistent part of your life that if you never make that choice,

you could end up being resentful for? Exactly, exactly. And it's kind of a mental and emotional move at the same time because, you know, where I'm from originally, you know, growing up in a really small town as a gay person where it really wasn't allowed when I was young anyway, there's this whole, there's just been a lot of levels

to the identity piece that have been just kind of haunting and just that overshadowing of everything that I've been doing for the past umpteen years. And I think that this move just kind of represents moving forward on like 10 different levels. And so, yeah, I would agree back to something that you guys just mentioned. Do you think that being a gay man complicates your relationship with your mother or you're just saying that you're a gay man who also has a complicated relationship with your mom? You know, this is an interesting question because, yeah, I would say both to some degree i think that most from my perspective most gay men have complicated relationships with

their mother it's either an over and like an overly codependent relationship or it's competitive to a certain degree and what are you competing about like uh for i don't know what the competition is male attention but it's just that there's like a dynamic that you feel like it's one upping like someone always has to be better than the other with your mother to some degree yeah oh i've seen that with a lot of my friends that if it's not super codependent like five phone calls a day then there's an underlying jealousy to some degree and i don't know where that stems from i don't know if it's i think competitive though might be the wrong word there's something it's gamesmanship right yeah it's games what about you billy is that is that true for you i think there's

an extra responsibility and this is just my opinion but i think there's an extra responsibility for gay men to take care of their mothers. And I don't know if there's some of that dynamic between the father, if there is a father figure where that gets in the way of what the relationship with the mother is supposed to be like. But with my personal experience, you know, it was my mom and me and then it was my dad. And so we, we had a relationship that kind of represented a partnership and then he got kind of pushed to the side because of his own shortcomings, for lack of a better term. Right, right. It's like being in a threesome and you're the one at the end of the bed. And can I just say, this is another part about your identity and trying to become a fully realized adult, basically, outside of this one thing in life, your adoption, that for a lot of people really determines the trajectory of what they're going to do. You see it so much with adopted kids that can't get themselves out of that one aspect of who they are.

and my mom is adopted and the thing that I wish for her that again this is like we spoke about at the beginning of this episode like she has a lot of issues but being able to leverage the different perspective that being adopted gives you so many people find it you know it's so negative there are so many harmful repercussions that they see if it's not handled in a certain way but you now have tools and you now have a perspective a lot of people don't having met your biological parents, knowing your adoptive parents and what sort of life they've provided you. So it's important, like Chelsea said, change the narrative of it being a negative thing to being a positive, like, look at what I've gotten to experience. Yeah, you have a bonus, as they say

in Sweden, you have a bonus family. Like you have all these bonus people in your life that you didn't get to, you know, you have to look at these things in life. Like we have to take the negative experiences and turn them into positives. That's our responsibility because that's really the only control you have. And you have all these things sound positive. Look at you. You're normal. You're sane. You're, you're smart. You're good looking. You're about to move to Maine and you know, like all this great stuff is happening. So yeah, I'm not worried about you for a second. You're getting into like being a fully realized man. Well, thank you very much for that. It just sometimes feels like even as someone in their early thirties, I feel like some days I'm 12, some days I might be

years old. And it just gets like, I think that's just being the human condition in general. Each day we wake up kind of either able to handle X, Y, and Z, or just kind of want to hide. Yeah. Yeah. Just remember you're not the only person thinking what you're thinking, you know? Right. Exactly. Exactly. Well, thank you so much, Billy. Please keep us posted. Let us know if you make the move. We'd like to keep track of the story. And make sure you reach out to both of your mother's on Mother's Day, no? Just as a nice gesture. Yeah, for sure. Want to maybe reach out to a mother that you don't know, a stranger. Absolutely. Okay. Thanks, Billy. Bye. I like Billy. Billy. Oh, that was really sincere. And like, oh, I feel like Dr. Phil right now. And

I feel like Dr. Phil with his wife, you know how his wife goes to work with him? That's like us. sweetheart it's like i go to work and then you come with me did you have someone uh that you loved in daytime i loved sally jesse raphael you mean sally jessica raphael oh yes no that's not right i just made that up okay sweetheart you can't agree with everything i say i mean that that doesn't that doesn't lend credibility to you i'm wrong so much in those ways that when you do correct me typically you are right so now i default to trusting you if you say something like that, that I was wrong. Right. Oh, I'm hosting Ellen, the Ellen show. Speaking of daytime. Yeah. Do you know when? I think the dates are June 30th and July 1st. They are correct. Yes.

So you can look out for that. Okay. What else do we have today? Okay. Our next submission comes from a woman named Carly. She's 35. We don't know where she is, but she's having some issues with her mother. So let's see what you think about this. She says, hi, Chelsea, coming to you is the final resort i've attempted to make peace via mental health professionals who i'm supposed to trust but it hasn't gotten me very far i saw your post and thought to myself why not i have nothing left to lose my mother is a complete narcissist who emotionally and sometimes physically abused everyone in my family my dad is dead now and since he's died the gloves have really come off oh god the family has fallen apart and we're all estranged i couldn't see any end to my mother's

emotional abuse i created a boundary and said unless my mom goes to counseling to build a healthy relationship in a safe space, we will not have a relationship. She said she won't be bullied into going to counseling. I'm wondering if I should let it all go, accept who she is, knowing that she'll probably hurt me again, or if I should continue to hold my boundary. I also have a daughter now who I need to protect after seeing my mom's abuse of my niece. She's 70 and won't be around much longer. I really miss her and need my mom, but also she's such a huge cunt. if i decide to keep her out of my life how do i prevent the issue from eating me up and turning me into a bitter cunt too society really doesn't like to talk about the fact that there are moms

who don't love their kids although i'm almost 35 i feel doomed to live a life in a perpetual infantilized state because i can't grow past the trauma of my mom not wanting me oh my god mothers are mothers like that are cunts they are Brandon this is a field this is your wheeled wheeled house this is your field house no this is your wheelhouse yeah these submissions make me realize like everyone has an issue well that's not only that though but it's just like you know mothers who act like that and who are not supportive to their children are baffling why would you go through that to bring a child into this world to not be able to put your best to it you know like do it well. Did you always know you did not want to be a mom? I knew because I wouldn't be a good mother

because I'm a selfish cunt. That's why. Well, see, and once you realize that makes everything else easier, doesn't it? Yeah, but it's like, come on. You know, these poor kids have to grow up thinking that their mother doesn't love them or their mother rejected them. I mean, how many people in this world have to experience that? It's so it's so sad to think of. Let's talk to Carly about it. I think she's on the phone. Oh, well, that was a long letter. She's going to follow it up hi hi Carly hello hi oh my god I felt so bad reading it well Brandon just read me your submission your letter and it's just such a bummer that your mother is like that yeah I mean so what's the status now what's your situation first of all Brandon has a lot of expertise in

this area because his mom is a hot mess so he's probably going to take the lead you're not you're not alone and first of all you look so beautiful yeah you do look thanks I tried really hard oh well you look really adorable oh thanks yeah I actually joined a couple groups on Facebook that are like daughters of narcissistic moms and like you scroll through the stories and every single one is exactly the same and that kind of made me feel better because I felt really isolated in my experience because I know so many people with great relationships with their moms but um the status now actually after I wrote you that thing I don't know why just for the next like three days I was really contemplating whether I should or not and then I just said fuck it I did

it one morning and she was surprised at first I couldn't even say hi without crying I just felt like such a little bitch but uh yeah I just said can we just like move forward and be nice to each other I'm like fuck the past who cares I don't care because she she's hung up on the past like can't let it go and she was like I don't know I'm pretty happy now and I don't really want you to ruin that so like she my dad my dad passed away in 2013 and she's uh with a new man now so and so i'm assuming that was a no-go on the counseling oh no she she's like fully against it which is hilarious because she used to tell me when i was younger that only crudely crazy people won't go to counseling most people who are in counseling are in it for people who won't go well i mean

that's a very I'm dealing with a very similar situation so again I feel your pain and I know the struggle and people who feel like they know more than everyone else will never go to counseling because they don't they don't want to do the work that it takes to really correct these issues so it's a battle you can't win but I do think that there's power in accepting that and accepting what type of relationship you're willing to have with your mom like for me right now it's no relationship. And so you just have to make the best decision that you know you're operating in a way that you can look back on it in 10, 15, 20 years whenever she's gone and know like I operated in my best interest in this way. Yeah, I feel like anything in my life, I even with boyfriends and

stuff, as long as I know I really gave it my all, I'm okay to move forward. It's just always gonna hurt. I don't know. It's also just impossible to deal with narcissists. Like I have a friend who's going through a divorce and I have another friend who's just getting out of a, you know, her divorce is finalized, but same thing. And it's like, you know, they're reading books about dealing with narcissists and, you know, about how difficult it is and what kind of number they pull on you, what they do to you mentally, because they, they literally have a way of eating away at your self-confidence, at your self-security, your ability to make a decision. You know, you become indecisive because you're not sure that your decision has value. So it's not talked about

as much as, you know, it probably will be in the next decade or two because people seem to be really talking about mental health now. But like dealing with a narcissist is, it has a very deleterious impact on all of us. You have to take that into consideration. It's like, it's almost like you're injured and you can't identify the injury. So you're acting in the weakness of the injury yet you know you're only really choosing to be injured yeah every single person in that group I'm in says they'd rather they would have rather gotten hit so they could see like hey this person did this to me and people would give them compassion but my mom is amazing at everyone my whole life your mom is so amazing she's so nice she's so this she's so that and it's just like

I don't know I was gonna bring up uh Ad Astra I don't know if you've seen it probably but um the movie yeah how brad pitt that movie was really therapeutic for me when brad pitt like literally went across the fucking solar system to connect with his father and he gets there and the dad's like nah i'm good yeah his dad was still an asshole he's like fuck you and he just floats off in this space it's like that's why i admire brandon like the way you handle your mom so much because i'm always fascinated by people who insist on a relationship with their parents when when they've been molested or god forbid something or beaten you know like something terrible and they still desire the relationship between the father and the mother and it's like i know a girl

who is trying to cultivate a relationship with a man who molested her who is her father and i cannot understand that it's a conditioning and carly i don't know if you'll agree with this but there's a certain level of gaslighting that goes on with parents and their kids that you're made to believe that this behavior is appropriate or it's a result of your behavior that they are not in control of what they do it's because they're reacting to what you're doing it's all such a mind fuck the thing i'm pissed about is that like now that i'm 35 i don't know it's taken me till now to have just a faint idea of what a healthy relationship is like i look back at my boyfriends and it's like i thought the way they were treating me was normal meanwhile they were

stealing from me they were emotionally abusing me gaslighting all this shit and it's like yeah i just i don't know do you have what's your story now you have a daughter you said yeah she just woke up do you want to see her sure i'm alone i'm alone with her so i i kind of multitasking do you mind waiting two seconds no no go ahead and grab her but don't expect me to get too excited around a baby i mean i can you know they're cute for a second oh she's sweet she's real cute yes but she's very timid like you can tell that there's a lot of baggage here which is unfortunate but seemingly it's one of those things that not a lot of people talk about either the dynamic with their parents oh that's okay that's a that's a little nugget cutie oh

and she woke up smiling uh this is like an ad for pregnancy or penetration or something yeah i didn't think i could get pregnant and then i did and uh i'm really i was like one of those like my whole 20s right up until my early 30s not having kids never having kids and then it just yeah who's the father of the baby his name's anthony are you guys together or um we're not exactly together no and that's the thing is like that's what i'm kind of what brought it up is because like, I hate that I don't know how to stay in a relationship. Like I just had such a bad example set for me. So, well, I think once you got your mother out of your life, which I think we're going to recommend doing, I think you're going to start to value yourself a little

bit more without that drum beat of negativity. And you should, and a, you need to break the cycle for your daughter. It's fucking hard work. I've been in counseling since I was 15. And like, Yeah. A lot of people now are like, your daughter's going to reap all the benefits. And I can I can definitely feel that. But it is hard being the one that has to break it. Yeah, I understand. But, you know, as a mother, that is your responsibility to break the cycle. I thought having a daughter would help me understand my mom more.

Like just going through that and shit. And like, I definitely understand way less. Like I think about saying or doing some of the shit that she said and did to us. And it just seems so ridiculous. Yeah, absolutely absurd. But I think that's part of it is that you have to be able to remove yourself from that and the decisions that she made, because those aren't all inherited traits. Like you're never going to be able to rationalize some of her behavior because it's tied to

a mental health issue, something that she had going on that you're never going to be able to understand, but you're doing the hardest part, which is the self-assessment now of what you don't want to create, the dynamic with your daughter, the behavioral patterns that you want to break. and the fact that you've been able to identify those things like that's the hardest part knowing that you want to make a change is yeah what's going to set you forward yeah it's just like uh i was explaining it to my friend and it's like having a beast in a cage inside of you at all times like i feel that shitty generational animosity or hostility or whatever it is this

pent-up shit but it sounds like you're on top of your game it sounds like you're you're cranking all of this stuff back and you are kind of like unlearning that behavior you know right it's hard to it's hard it's really hard to know whether or not to have her in my life i don't think you should we're both telling you no let me just say this my girlfriend from high school just extricated her parents from her life she wrote them a letter they were assholes for years and years and years lots of drama in that family and she's never felt better just as an aside in the same situation with me is that I cut off all communication and I did it multiple times in my life. The longest time was two and a half years. I'm at like nine months right now. When you have

that space from that person who, first of all, they're giving that little beast that you talk about power. So you remove them from that and you have so much more awareness of what's really going on in your life and what power they've had on you or that you've allowed them to influence in your life. And as soon as you get some time apart, it just puts things into perspective and you realize what you're not going to allow anymore in your dynamic. Also, a narcissist needs the interaction. So that's why I don't tell my sisters what to do. I have three sisters. I let them all make their own decisions. I don't agree with them. I have three brothers. Oh, what's up with your brothers? Are they talking to your mom? One's in Australia. The other one, no. She like took

him to court when he was younger. Uh, she, yeah, she's brutal. And then, um, my other ones in Florida, that's my dad's son though. My sister and I are biological full siblings. So. And does your sister talk to your mom? Nope. Well then hello. Yeah. Stop talking to your mom. You need to listen to us and stop talking to your mother. Okay. I mean, either do that for like, at least commit to a certain amount of time and report back to us. Seriously. I want you to commit to not talking to your mom and report back okay okay okay Carly do we have a pinky swear Brandon give us a pinky swear Brandon and I are pinky swearing on your behalf there you go oh that's cute keeping families together that's what we're calling our podcast well not your mom but

anyway thank you Carly please keep us posted okay see ya poor Carly what the fuck is wrong with everybody Brandon I don't know but you know what she I just can't believe mothers you know I guess it's that's comes from my own narrow viewed life experience because my mom was such a mom like in you know sweet in that sense well and anyone who's listening to this I guess I would hope that that would be a perspective they take is that not all these relationships maybe this is not a feel good episode but everyone has issues in their life everyone has a different relationship with their mother nothing is appropriate or not appropriate like the expectations that we set on these relationships well they're all different they are different but it's just such a bummer to

hear about jealous moms or narcissistic moms. It's like, how can you do that if you're having a child? I guess it's very probably prevalent. You know, it's a bunch of narcissists having babies. But this is also interesting that two of the submissions so far have been people who may or may not, should not have had kids. Well, you can't say should not. Well, I think there's some people who, well, society conditions women to believe that they should be. I have a friend who has kids who shouldn't. And you need to know that up front. Like, this is probably not for me. But then there are some people who believe like they are meant to do this and offer that sort of motherly dynamic in the world.

And there is a woman who I read about a couple of years ago. Her name is Sarah Cunningham. And she started doing this thing at pride parades where she had a sign that said free mom hugs because people were going and their parents weren't in support of them. So she would go and she would offer that maternal hug to these people who didn't have a parent there to support them. And so she's turned it into an organization called Free Mom Hugs. and one of the quotes says, if you need a mom to attend your same-sex wedding because your biological mom won't, call me.

I'll be your biggest fan. So it's sweet. So there are some of these women out there who are probably killing it at the mom game. Yeah, yeah, right. If they're doing that, that's really sweet. I think we should take a quick break. Okay, sweetheart.

Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave, Netflix, and Disney+. from $94 a month price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit visit bell.ca for details and to check availability bell connection is everything when i was 14 years old i was kidnapped and held captive for nine months i survived and i've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them i'm elizabeth smart And these are the survivor files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything.

Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up, without a doubt, he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed, and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo, and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed.

From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table it's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters and that is a trojan horse whether you're looking for literary deep dives smart pop culture conversations or a community of readers who love to think a little too much you're in the right place listen to pro society on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. On the new podcast Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because

it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip. I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport and Sean Clements. We host the podcast

Hollywood Handbook on the Big Money Players Network. Our show is extremely accessible to first-time listeners. Each week, we talk to someone in show business, aka the biz, and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. Everyone has a good time and no gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show we've had a lot of great guests like sarah sherman not that great actually can you help me can you help me shape this how about we flip it on his head okay how about we flip the script okay what if the surprise woman who actually you think is the straight man is actually the one who's acting weird adam scott this entire time you've been expecting

Adam Sandler to come to visit the show I would never expect I would never set expectations for something like that to happen if the universe allows for something like that to happen I'm open to it I'm always going to accept

Danny McBride fine yeah it's all this fragile masculinity exuding I could smell it walking down the hallway to be honest with you I was like is that weed nope it's fragile masculinity yeah ben stiller no because a lot of times in out of context people don't get it or even know what a circle is you know what i mean like they're like oh what's this

everyone's so dumb and fake right fake and and also not interested or just like oh i've got my life i don't care about your life and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us oh and by the way will ferrell told us personally he loves the show and he wants to be a on every episode, but he's just so busy. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm just astounded that people, mothers are so stupid that they wouldn't go to their gay son's wedding.

I mean, honestly, like what are you raised on? Just like Jesus Christ and oatmeal. I mean, get a fucking clue, lady. Like gay people are not going anywhere. I know, but it's some people just, I mean, okay me for instance i have a very diverse background well really are you cuban what's the diversity with my upbringing okay and my mom still took issue when i came out you know we didn't talk for six months and she had you know she's would you classify your mom as a is your

mom going to listen to this podcast because you're not going to be talking afterward this is all stuff i've said to her by the way so nothing well now i'm saying it to her which might be double the trouble would you classify your mother as a narcissist yes oh okay and she is a master manipulator okay yeah when i called the police and asked her to be arrested because she was drunk driving i then wrote a letter to the state's attorney asking him to provide it to the judge and i requested the harshest possible punishment for her for her to be in a gulag literally anything that they could do that would force her to reflect like these is this really where i want to be right now and uh they read that letter to her and i basically stated all

this stuff so from your son brandon they read it to her yeah in front of people by whoever was in the courtroom do you know what her reaction to that letter was i couldn't tell you but i know can you read us the letter yeah i mean you want me to find it yeah read it to us hold on this is exciting i like confronting people especially in this way too bad the police suck so bad because i would say well you were in the court actually so there were probably very few police officers there but oh god let's not go down that road okay so this is uh you really want me to read this i want you to see that this is the letter that you wrote your state attorney your mother's state attorney general the state attorney who'd be prosecuting her case in the county in which she

lives okay this is the letter i wrote dui 12 18 2020 was a subject hello i hope this email finds you healthy and happy during the holiday season i'm reaching out in regards to a recent incident involving my mother my mother has unfortunately had multiple interactions with the law in recent months due to her substance abuse issues and unresolved mental health matters most recently she was arrested while driving under the influence of alcohol and held for a psychiatric review i'm emailing in hopes that with your help my mother will receive the harshest possible punishment for her crime this is a plea i make not out of anger or vengeance but out of concern for her well-being and safety of those around her.

My mother is unwell and unstable, and when drinking a hazard, as she habitually drinks and drives, wrecking multiple vehicles after hitting inanimate objects. Oh my God! My mother is a beautiful and articulate woman. She is also highly deceptive and manipulative,

and until now, evaded the law and any punishment. I would like that to change. As a former South Dakotan, I am aware of how lenient the law can be for DUI charges. My former stepfather has had many with almost no repercussions. My mother has long operated as a functioning alcoholic, but at this juncture is failing to function as a civilized member of society

and needs help getting back on track. I'm asking for your help in getting this woman's life back in order. My mother was a single woman raising four kids and worked countless jobs simultaneously for many years. Her potential success is limitless, but she needs forced course correction. This is not a person or a case to disregard. This is a case that could create positive change should it be handled the right way. nearly six months sober before her most recent incident she'd been part of multiple aa meetings

weekly these meetings held her accountable and should be mandatory after any intoxication arrest in my humble opinion i've copied my sister here one of her daughters to corroborate details and assist in any way that's good so see it's with intention of like positivity yeah right right right and did you ever get a response from that no i apparently what i was told when i called is that he couldn't legally respond. Oh, OK. Because way to go, kiddo. Yeah, he probably wanted to be like, uh-huh. But from my understanding, like this does not happen a lot. And I think that with any of these things, like, you know, how many people we talked to today with mommy issues and so many times people think it's daddy issues, but there's a lot of fucked up shit going on. Well, I would

also like to say, yeah, there's some daddy issues, too. But as a stepfather, as a recent stepfather, because when I was living in Whistler, I became a stepfather, de facto stepfather. My friend Kelly They had those two girls, and they called me dad, and they would come over and sleep down the weekends at my house. You really thrived as a stepfather. And I loved being a stepdad. Like, I loved taking them to dinner, taking them shopping, playing games with them. They'd snuggle in my bed.

You know, we'd watch movies. Like, we just had, like, a total vibe going, and I'd feel like, oh, I've never wanted to be a mom, but I could kill it as a divorcee dad. You know, come in, you just spread the sunshine, spread the love, and then leave on Monday morning, but skedaddle before things get too dicey. See, that to me is more, you'd be the perfect ex-husband because the stepdad has to do all like the daily bullshit. I'm sorry. It's not stepdad. It's ex-husband. Yeah. Who has a younger wife and wants to start a family with her. So I can only come once in a while. You're good for Friday through Sunday meals and toys. Yeah. Friday

through Sunday. Yeah. Friday, Friday night through Sunday. Yep. Yep. That's good. Cause as soon as they would leave on Sunday or Monday, like I needed a day to myself to recover. So when I just think about people raising children and having to deal during this pandemic and mothers, I just can't even, I can't relate because I can't even imagine. In closing today's episode, Brandon, I would like to say that there seems to be a biological thread. It's almost like a biological mandate, if you will. People are tied to their biological parents and biological children. It's seemingly very hard for people to break the idea that they may not have long-term relationships with their parents. But to your point, so many kids need homes and there are so

many other more healthy relationships out there than your parents. If that's not a healthy relationship, find another relationship that is. These are not things that you need. Yeah, but it also feels like a structure of society, right, that has been imposed upon people to the point of believing that you have to have this almost fealty towards not necessarily brothers and sisters it's not as strong between brothers and sisters as it is between parents and children that seems to be a very and while you can you can understand it it also it is limiting to people if you get you know a dud for a mom or a dad or you know my dad was he could be a bit of a dud but all in all you know it was it was a cute relationship and it provided me with a lot

of comedy but i bless him yeah may god rest his soul or whatever that saying is god be with him anyway so that's an interesting takeaway from today's episode is the biological necessity people are obsessed with biology whereas you know gay people can tell you this any day of the week you make your own family yeah so don't be so tied down to the people in your family that suck just take a fucking break that's what i'm doing right now more people should yeah i i encourage it especially if it's a break it's not permanent so who gives a shit okay i think we're in conclusion of part one of the episode uh brandon what do you think well there's yeah there's still more that we need to address so we're gonna have to do a part two

okay we're gonna do a part two so tune in for part two please we'll see you on the other side i survived nine months in captivity and i've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them i'm elizabeth smart and these are the survivor files every week i'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable abducted stalked controlled and nearly silenced these are stories about what it takes to make it out alive listen to the survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone

who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers book talk creators and plenty of overthought opinions listen to pro society on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts did you hear the new episode of the hey jonas podcast we are at d23 so we'll see who stops by the cast of frozen stopped by kristin bell josh gad and adina menzel i auditioned for frozen what for kristoff they said okay what are you going to be singing today i said i don't know that must have been why you didn't get it Oh, you probably won.

Plus, John Stamos, Hayden Christensen from Star Wars, and more. And I guess I can share that, uh... No way. Listen to the latest episode of Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself

because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita trading the pity for possibility listen to solita on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts Each week, we talk to someone in show business and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. Everyone has a good time, and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show.

We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman, Adam Scott, Danny McBride, Ben Stiller, and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human.