Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler - Sleeping with Your Coworkers with Lauren Lapkus

Episode Date: October 31, 2024

  Lauren Lapkus joins Chelsea to talk about the emotions motherhood has brought out in her, how she feels about the paranormal, and how she met her husband…at work. Then: A friends-with-benefits situation goes south.  A widowed mom wonders if she should see a medium.  And one half of a partnership decides they want kids after all.  * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human. Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches, there's a lot of suspense. Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pesto survive the first bite? Will the lunchbox come home empty, half full, or come home at all?

And will you finish episode eight before you're done slicing the cucumbers? Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave, Netflix, and Disney Plus from $94 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for details and to check availability.

Bell. Connection is everything. I survived nine months in captivity, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are The Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. These are stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse.

Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. Yeah, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport. And Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook. Each week, we talk to someone in show business and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us.

Everyone has a good time and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show. We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman, Adam Scott, Danny McBride, Ben Stiller, and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, Catherine. Hi, Chelsea. Hi. Today is Halloween. It's my sister's birthday.

Oh, really? My sister Shoshana's birthday is today, yes. Oh my gosh, I have a brother-in-law who's a Halloween baby. happy birthday to all the halloween babies and it's maybe not your favorite holiday i'm not into halloween i don't really like costumes see i do which is why which is exactly yeah i would i would expect that you would like costumes because we're pretty opposite on everything yeah except for both being a pisces yeah we're both pisces but a lot of people like Halloween. I mean, I'm always amazed that people are so into it as adults, too. Yeah. See, I just

love doing a detailed outfit and makeup look like all that. All that. I'm just going to get penetrated and stay indoors. Oh, that sounds lovely. I'm going to order in outdoor penetration and have that for the evening. That's fantastic. And my nephew, I believe, arrives tonight. Tonight is Halloween. Those two things are very separate. Well, I won't be penetrated by my nephew but I want to make sure that they don't get the idea to come out and stay with me too often this is the one that didn't leave before oh so obviously if they hear me in the bedroom having a really good time which I would never allow to happen I just want everyone to know that I would not that I wouldn't allow I would never want that to happen but it could happen

okay all right and that'll set him straight he's warned fair warning yeah so did you hear that Jakey, welcome home. Our guest today is perfect for Halloween because her new podcast, which is called Haunting, explores paranormal experiences told by those who experience them. And she also stars in The Wrong Miss C on Netflix, and as well as she has a new film coming out called Another Happy Day. Please welcome Lauren Lapkus. Hi, Pikachu.

How are you? Oh, my God. Long time no see, honey bunny. I know. So nice to see you. How are you? You're a mother. you're a oh my god you're so many things now i know a lot has changed a lot has changed to give you background about lauren and i the first time we met right was on that show that they created it was on nbc it was based on one of my books are you there vodka it's me chelsea maybe and yes lauren was one of the cast members with laura prepon yeah ali wong ali wong yes and then what

is i feel bad that i don't remember his name lenny clark lenny yes yes the hot one right oh no that was the dad oh no lenny's not hot sorry i take that back he's not the hot one um jake mcdormand jake yeah but jake's in a lot of stuff now too yeah i always see him and i'm always like that guy looks really familiar and then i have to remember yeah he was on the show with you idiot that was a very short-lived show it was on for one season and that was it so we only got to spend a short amount of time together, but I love seeing you and all of the things that I get to see you in and I can't thank you. Yes. And you're so wait, you just had a baby six months ago, right? Your second baby. Yes. So you have two girls. I have two girls. Yeah. How does it feel to be a

mother of women? It's great. It's great. But I mean, I love it. I love girls. I was hoping for girls. Were you happy? Yeah. Yeah. I always find that my girliest friends have boys. Yes. And if you're not too girly and you're girly but you're not you're not overly girly yeah I would agree with that yeah you have girls and yeah and I like that I like that dynamic I like what that does to people because it really throws people off their game it's true it's true as if parenting isn't hard enough then you have to parent the sex that you weren't hoping to have yeah it's crazy it's a lot but I'm I'm I'm coming out of my like postpartum whole were you did you have postpartum no I just mean like my literal like postpartum time but I

didn't have postpartum depression but coming out of the like you know that period of feeling like what is everything like my body's crazy I'm starting to feel like myself more so yeah I don't know how anyone has children I really don't understand how people are able to manage all of the things in life and then raise children I am in awe of every woman I think I was talking about this my friend who has four kids I'm like I don't understand how anything gets done in your life like how do you manage four kids she's like Chelsea it just happens and then you do it I know but I literally I used to think like four sounded amazing but like having one is really hard and then having two is actually harder and it's crazy there's just no time to like sit down and think

about anything for even a second so it's a lot but I recently hired a nanny and that's changed my whole entire life because now I can like, you know, do this without feeling like I'm split between five things at once. It's so weird that I have a nanny and I don't have any children. Speaking of podcasts, Lauren has a new podcast. Tell us all about it. I do. It's called Haunting. It's on iHeart and I play a dead influencer named Teresa who has, she's stuck between heaven and hell because she hasn't gotten verified yet. So it's like a hybrid scripted and unscripted podcast. So my portions are a scripted part where I'm this dead influencer and then we hear real ghost stories from people who are calling in

and sharing their truth. And are you big into ghost stories? I am, but I'm also very scared. I get very scared very easily and I get scared of like scary movies. So it's a little ironic, but I mean, do you have any ghost stories? Do you believe in ghosts? I mean, I'm not, I don't disbelieve in ghosts. I dated a guy that had a house that was definitely there were ghosts in the house. I could feel them. I could hear them. I couldn't see them, but I could feel the presence. But most of the places, I think I have a frequency that doesn't really allow me to see that many ghosts. They're like, you're not open to this. Like, I don't have time for that. You know what I mean? Yeah. I feel like I've like looked at Zillow and seen a house that gave me

chills. Like it's just like nothing even is like weird about it. It's just like, oh, something's wrong. Something's wrong there. Right. Bad vibes. Yeah. If there's a bad vibe in a place, I'm usually out of there pretty quickly. I don't know why we associate ghosts as being bad, because I bet there are some good ghosts right like what's the theory behind why ghosts are even around because they're in the middle of crossing over or what yeah or they have unfinished business is i guess what people always say but it does seem weird when you think about it because literally every inch of earth would have a bunch of ghosts on it you know what i mean if it was all just like people who died and right still hanging around it's just if i don't know it's hard to it's hard

to know maybe there's certain environments where they are more prone to come out yeah i mean And like ghost hunter people go to those special places where I guess there's more vibes. They're all hanging out waiting in like an old abandoned psych ward or something. That's what I want for you, which once the kids are old enough, I want you to become a permanent professional ghost hunter. That's my real goal. That's my passion. That's what I'm excited about.

And I'm going to do that. So yeah, great. I'm glad you support me. Excellent. And now, wait, you have a new movie coming out also, which is, it's a comedy, but you are very dramatic in it, right? It's the most dramatic role you've played, I think, so far. Yeah, yeah, I think so. It's called Another Happy Day. And it's a movie about postpartum depression. So it's a comedy. It's finding the absurdity in those like really dark, hard things

that people experience. So it's definitely like it's not like slapstick, but it's you know, there's comedy. It's different from other stuff I've done. And I read that she the director had a daycare on set and was and even though it was an indie film, they had you guys were taking care of so that everyone could bring their children it was amazing she made it a priority to have eight hour work days so we weren't shooting for like typical movie hours of like 12 to 15 hour days and she provided child care to people who needed it and it was it was very it felt like a very supportive environment for parents and also just for anyone who was not a parent it was great because you were done at five o'clock every day and it was like normal

so people really appreciated that there was it was just a very happy set yeah well when people are yeah when you have help with your children people seem to get much happier it would be nice if our country could take on that responsibility I know it's so interesting people like think that's a bad idea I don't get it but have you had any like I want to ask you personal questions about parenting and motherhood yeah what was your biggest meltdown as a mother that threw you for a loop-de-loop yeah I mean I think I reach one every few months of like just hitting a actual breaking point I mean most recently so I yeah I have a six-month-old and a three-year-old and so much of it has to do with not sleeping it's just like the terrible feelings that come

from not sleeping that like I reached a total breaking point where everything was just making me cry and then I immediately downloaded this like sleep training app thing or like program called taking care of babies this woman who like tells you how to like make your baby go to sleep and it wasn't I mean it has changed everything so I have to say it was worth doing but it was it's like that breakdown moment of like i'm just gonna buy the thing it's 250 i don't care i'm just gonna buy this right now i don't even know what this is like let's just go um because you can't function in your own home and get anything done the sleep deprivation seems to be the biggest issue because it's so funny i was out with my friends the other night and i was with karen and

molly and karen was like you know she just got her baby to sleep through the night and she was saying i was like it's so funny that you you have a baby you're so in love with this baby all you want to do is like you know love on this baby and you know see it grow and take every picture you can possibly take and like and then when you're fucking tired you're like go the fuck to sleep like I can't love you in the middle of the night also I mean I know well my personality really does go out the window it is like I think with my three-year-old she's she's delightful like the funniest person ever but like the bedtime thing of like I finally got the baby down and then she wants to just like make me do every single thing I'm like singing and dancing in her room for like

a full hour like i have a routine that i do that involves four songs and i have to repeat them as many times as she says and it's crazy there's a song called the lovey song where we just list every single person that we can think of and say we love them and that's cute yeah i mean then twinkle twinkle and abc's i sing over and over again and then she likes to do a mash-up where she sings one and i sing the other because they have the same melody and she just thinks that's delightful and she's like it's the same song i mean it's kind of smart for a three-year-old but i'm usually like at my breaking point i think they catch wind after a while like that you catch wind or whatever after a while that this is the go to bed song and then they stop wanting

to hear that song they're like i know what you're up to yeah everyone i know who has two kids says that like two is more than twice as hard as one do you find that to be true i think so i think like there's one like one thing that i found surprising was that i feel like it's easier in some sense because i'm not as like stressed like i feel like i get how it's gonna go it's not as abstract that she's going to grow up into like a really fun person who like will talk and be great so like all of that makes it easier because the first time you're like just going through every day like how will it ever be different than it is right now it feels like this is forever but what's hard is like just doing two things at once because they're on totally different pages with

what they need and one of them can tell you what they need and one just cries so it's yeah I think that's where it gets really hard and those moments where it gets really overwhelming are when both of them are needing something at the same time. And you feel like you can't do everything. And that's always a sad feeling. Can't you just get the little one a tutor so she can start communicating more quickly? I think that is what I need to do. Yeah. That's why you're here today, Lauren. I have all the answers. Thank you. Tell me about like, if you can, I would love to hear about one of your most joyful experiences you've had since becoming a mother. Oh, my God. So many. I feel like it's the happiest I've ever been.

I really feel I could I honestly could cry right now. I feel very fulfilled by being a mom and I love it so much. And I think the happiest is like really just watching both of them and like looking at how they're developing and how their personalities are developing. And my older one, like the when the more she can articulate herself and say her full thoughts, like I'm just in awe of it. I just every it's so beautiful. like truly every day I watch her for at least a few moments where I'm just going like wow I can't

believe you're this person who has all these feelings and then I'll think about her getting older and how and that will make me really excited but also make me want to cry and or her being like 30 or something it's just like such a fleeting period I think time just moves so differently watching someone age because you're like you were just a baby like that's only been a couple years and now you're this person with all these you know desires and you're so funny and the idea of her like growing up and you know telling me to fuck off is like overwhelming I just came from a friend who has three boys and one of them is a teenager and the way he speaks to them is horrendous like I'm so scared of that it's so awful and I'm like oh my god and she's like well you know it's

the worst it's it's terrible because and now the younger kids are picking up the language from the older kids and they're like actually contemplating sending him to boarding school because they don't know what to do with him and she's like I feel like my son is a product of LA like that is a product of Los Angeles I'm from Chicago and like I'm from Evanston Illinois and it's like a really perfect suburb of Chicago it's just so great and I it was such an ideal place to grow up and being out here is a weird element for me to like get my head around like oh they're gonna be like LA kids Like, what does that mean? And of course, it's like my influence will do something, but then the world influences them, too. Yeah. Yeah. But I think kids are always reacting to some sort of absence of something. Right.

Like most of your bad behavior is a result of some sort of neglect. And not that my friend's a neglectful parent, but she even said herself, like, I need to be more present. I need to be home more. You know, there's always like a reason why kids act that way. It's not like they're just fucking screaming at you. Fuck you, mom, because they're not upset. they're clearly upset about something that's transpired or a pattern that has evolved. Yeah. And puberty, I think, is just like uncontrollable. I wouldn't go through puberty again. First of all, I'm pretty sure I, well, I'm going through, I'm not, I don't think I've hit menopause, but I'm very menopausal for sure. And I'm like,

which is worse? I don't know. What was worse, puberty or perimenopause? I read this book, Naomi Watts wrote this book about menopause and I read it. And as I was reading it, every symptom hit me. I was like, Oh, I started having hot flashes. And then my shoulder started hurting. There's this menopause shoulder thing. I'm like, what? And I go, yeah, there's a frozen shoulder that women get. And then weird. I mean, I'm, I'm of the age, I would assume I'm in perimenopause, but I've never really like I get tested pretty frequently. And I'm going again after reading that fucking book, because I'm like, something's up. But all of the other things around it, I just started to experience like all these symptoms that she was talking about. And then I

came home I asked my doctor for something for night sweats because I was getting those night sweats and he gave me this over-the-counter thing and it worked right away so I sent it to my sisters and my sister's like I used that for six months and it didn't work once she's like I don't even she goes I don't even think I think you just get thoughts suggested to you and then you have them she's like you read a book about menopause now you think you have menopause and then you took the things that are for menopause and you're fine she's like so I'm like I am I am more impressionable and malleable than one would think at least it works for the medication too if you just think it's working it works for you like that's a good side effect oh it's called bonafide

guys in case anybody has night sweats bonafide it's in a green bottle and if you use that for hot flashes it worked for me my sister said she used it for six months and it didn't work for her but shout out to bonafide it's fascinating i'm like perimenopause is really coming up a lot i mean because my friends are you know getting to that point and so it's interesting there's so many things that are never explained to us about this i feel like my whole life like you heard what menopause was and it's like I guess hot flashes is the one thing that I would think of but there's so many other side effects and it can hit you earlier just all these things that nobody teaches us because people don't care about women's health yeah exactly because but you're well you're 39

right yeah I'm 49 so you're a decade younger than me so you're about you're gonna turn 40 next year yeah mm-hmm I kept thinking I was 40 this year I like lost track of my age I was like driving I was like wow I can't believe I'm 40 and then I was like oh I'm 39 and then I was like I'm actually 38 like it was like I have no idea I think at a certain point like stops mattering but yeah I'm 39 now I don't know if it's Los Angeles because we have access to so many anti-aging practices I don't know if it's just modern times but age does not feel like what it felt like when I was growing up and or it's just us being adults and being like no no I'm still young I'm vibrant I know yeah that's also you can't tell if it's just how you feel inside but I saw this like

thing that was so funny it was like the golden girls hairstyles on like celebrities who are the same age as the actors who are playing them like now it was like j-lo with like the golden girls hairstyle because they were so young like i feel like age was like put out to us as like being so much older than it was back in the day with even just like the style it was so old-fashioned feeling and like not sexy how do you feel about aging what's your i mean you're a mom now so your priorities are your children i'm sure you're not stuck with your head up your ass but you still are an actress so you have to think about that stuff yeah yeah I mean I definitely think about it I I mean and I I feel like all the things that people are doing to like look great are have

evolved so much and everyone looks amazing I don't even know what all the things are but I'm like when I need to know I'm sure I'll have a few friends that can be like what are the things I need to do right now but I don't think about it too much I mean I I do feel young I feel the same like in so many ways as I did 10 years ago although I guess that physically that maybe it's not true at all. Maybe that's not, I'm like about to take it all back actually, because I'm like, I feel more confident. I feel like better about myself. I have like higher self-esteem. I don't think, I don't overthink my actions as much as I used to. And I also physically possibly feel worse, but mentally I think I feel better. Well, that's just because you just had a baby. So

you're tired. But in another happy day, you had to be very emotional, right? You had to cry a lot. How did it work for you? Because you haven't done a lot of roles like that. Yeah. I mean, in the past, like the sort of crying I had to do was like in like Jurassic World, like watching like a dinosaur eat a security guard or something like it's not really like the same as crying about a baby. But I feel like having kids brought my emotions to like the forefront where it gets all kind of right there. I really I almost cried like five minutes ago talking to you. I'm just like I could really cry at any moment just thinking about life. And So it was easier, but also the director of this movie is so amazing.

Nora Pfeiffer, who also wrote the movie, she's an actor and we're old friends as well. And she she just like has such a great way with actors of like getting you to tap into something without making you feel the pressure of it. But she's just a she's a really great communicator. But yeah, it was it's definitely it felt like I was crying all the time when we were shooting that because just doing multiple takes where you're sobbing is it wears you out. I don't know.

Have you ever had to cry in something? I don't think I would be able to. I'm not sure that I'm that kind of, I'm, first of all, I'm not really an actress, but I like acting every once in a while and like to do like, you know, when a project comes my way, that's interesting. I'm totally open to it. But I have never really had to cry. I've had to be emotional, which is easy, because that's just kind of acting emotional. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know that I'm a gifted enough actress to have to cry. I'd really have to get into the right zone. yeah it helps that with this the script within this movie is like truly my character is just really struggling and so most of the stuff i'm saying is stuff that would make me cry if i really said it so that helps too how did you meet your husband we met on a sitcom that we were both on called clipped that was on tbs it was another short-lived sitcom and it was created by max muchnick and david cohen and starring ashley tisdale and george went and me and my husband

mike were both on the show as well and it was only 10 episodes but from like the pilot getting picked up to like shooting the the other episodes it was like a full year so we would hang out as a cast a lot and we got to be friends and after the show was done we got together but yeah because you're so professional because you're so professional you would never ever let something like that happen prior i and i was married to somebody else oh well there's a good reason sort of sort of i didn't know you were oh my gosh this is your second marriage yes it is Wow, look at you, girl. Because I've lived quite a life since I've seen you.

My God, I must have had a real influence on you. Yeah, I've been through a lot, so it's great. That also helps with, you know, not caring about stuff as much. Exactly. Exactly. Okay, we're going to take a break, and we're going to come back with Lauren, and we're going to take some callers. Yay.

The Jonas Brothers are running it back. We live the Burning Up Tour and celebrate the biggest Jonas Brothers hits that have defined a generation. One incredible celebration. One unforgettable night. See the Jonas Brothers live at RBC Amphitheater, September 28th. Get tickets now at Ticketmaster.ca. Jonas Brothers, the Burning Up Tour, all over again. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and held captive for nine months.

I survived, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are the Survivor Files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up, without a doubt, he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed, and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them.

They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo, and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. From best-selling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments,

nothing is off the table. It's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse. Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

See you between the pages. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport. And Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook on the Big Money Players Network. Our show is extremely accessible to first-time listeners. Each week, we talk to someone in show business, a.k.a. the biz, and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. everyone has a good time and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show

we've had a lot of great guests like sarah sherman not that great actually can you help me can you help me shape this yeah how about we flip it on his head right how about we flip this around okay what is the surprise woman who actually you think is the straight man is actually the one who's acting weird adam scott this entire time you've been expecting adam sandler to come to visit the show i i would never let go of that i have i would never set expectations for something like that if the universe allows for something like that to happen i'm open to it i'm always going to accept you know danny mcbride fine yeah it's all this fragile masculinity exuding i could smell it walking down the hallway to be honest with you i was like is that weed nope it's fragile

masculinity ben stiller no because a lot of times in out of context people don't get it or even know what a circle is you know what i mean like you're like oh what's this state everyone's so dumb and fake right fake and and also not interested or just like oh i've got my life i don't care about your life and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us oh and by the way will ferrell told us personally he loves the show and he wants to be a guest on every episode, but he's just so busy. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude

is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip. I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

you get your podcasts. And we're back with Lauren Lapkus, who is just a breath of fresh air. Thank you. Well, we have some callers, we have some emails today, but I wanted to, since we've touched on sort of paranormal ghosty stuff and sort of like talking about the great beyond. I wanted to start with one. It's a little more serious, but I wanted to start with this question from Susanna. She says, should I see a medium? Dear Chelsea. Yes. The answer is always yes. In 2013, my husband passed away in a car accident. He left me and my then 12-year-old daughter. My daughter is now 22 and living in Seattle, the place where my husband was raised, where we first met, and where she was born. I think he would be so proud of the woman she has

become but every time there's a major event in her life he won't be there and it's not just her big events either in june she and i attended a wedding and when the father-daughter dance started she had to leave the room oh my god i know i guess i just want to know if he's around if there's any part of him that's keeping an eye on her i've thought before it'd be nice to talk to him through a medium but i'm also a skeptic if there's any way that it's real and he's around it would ease my heart. Should I seek one out, Susanna? Definitely. I would definitely. Yeah. I mean, what if you have to lose? Like I've had readings by bad psychics or mediums or whatever, and it still makes you feel good. Like the idea that someone, because it exists. I definitely believe

that your husband is around and he can communicate with you. And if you find the right person, he can come through and say the things that are going to feel good to you to hear. It's a very rare that you go to a psychic or a medium and you leave feeling worse or like no one's out there it gives you a sense of oh this is all possible because they're they're talking to somebody you know whether their communication is flawless or not it's like people don't get into that just to like dupe other people it's not like you're walking down the street in new york city and going into like you know a five dollar place like if you really seek out a good medium and they have Yelp reviews, like you can go online and actually find somebody that has a lot of good reviews.

But I think there's only benefits from that. People have always said to me, Oh, I don't want to hear anything bad. I don't want to hear that I'm going to get cancer. That's not what they do. They don't do that. They give you good positive information. And they relay information to you if they can, in fact, speak to the people in your life that are no longer here. And I wholeheartedly believe in that I've had amazing experiences with mediums. That is so cool. I believe in that too. and I have had good experiences as well, but nothing too like life-changing, but it was what you're saying

that like I left feeling like happy and it felt like a nice connection. And even just, I always loved Long Island Medium and people would be like, that's not real or whatever. My feeling is if it's, even if it was not real, it does make those people feel so good and that's really not a bad thing,

but I do believe in it. And have you seen Life After Death with Tyler Henry on Netflix? Yes, I have. Oh, my God. He's amazing. Yeah, we've had him on the podcast. He is amazing. Oh, my God. Wow. Did he do a reading for you? I think so. Yeah, he did a little reading for me.

Yeah. So amazing. That's a really good show. But I mean, I think this person should try that. I don't especially if you're thinking, should I do this? Like, why not? Like, I do think you're right that if you look and find a person that has a great reviews or was like highly recommended, then that makes it worthwhile. Yeah. And also Laurelyn Jackson, I would say like read some of her books. We've had her on the podcast as well. And she also says like, when I work with people, they can speak to their loved ones through me, but also like you can just talk to them like they're here. But I would say start with a medium and then like upgrade to just have a conversation with them. Also, because it shouldn't

be prohibiting your life. And like, you know, going to a wedding should be a joyous occasion. Watching a father and daughter dance should be a joyous occasion. And when it starts to interrupt the stuff that you should be joyful for others for then you really need to do something about it like and you need to actually start thinking about your father in addition to you know contacting a medium and exploring that you know you should really encourage your daughter to be thinking about your her father as if he's walking with her you know just because he's not physically here it's it's very limiting to only believe this is what exists that's silly i mean and when people say that i just know that they're narrow you know what i mean because there's so much that we don't

know there's and there's so many different scientists metaphysicists and mediums and people like that that all have the same story that there are seven different realms of consciousness that there are seven you know and this and and that that are coexisting at the same time there's people that are crossed over have crossed over there are people that are in other dimensions there's all these things kind of coexisting at the same time but we can only see what we can see so i i always would encourage people to be more open-minded well our next question comes from carly and she says dear chelsea i've been having a sexual relationship with a co-worker for about two months now for you i mentioned to him that i missed having a friends with benefits situation

and later that night he told me he was interested in being that for me oh shit love it yeah she's getting it so far a plus a plus plus i was hesitant at first because he's a co-worker and he's also 23 and I'm 30. I know he's genuinely a good guy, so I decided to go for it. It turned out that the sex was amazing, probably the best I've ever had, and I couldn't get enough. I started doing things that I would never allow myself to do with other men. I allowed him to spend nights at my house, cuddle. He gives me compliments like saying I'm so perfect, so beautiful, etc. I have really thick walls up, but I let some of the walls down for him. I don't usually allow myself to be vulnerable with men because I'm scared of

rejection and getting hurt. And of course, because he treats me so well, I caught feelings and told him about it. He basically said he was not interested in continuing our relationship. So she said, being rejected like that made me realize I'm growing out of my friends with benefits phase, and I think I'm ready to look for something more mature. I've never been in a serious relationship before because I've never allowed that for myself. I always self-sabotage and overthink things. So what's your advice for me as I move into this different phase of my dating life Carly hi Carly hello hi this is Lauren our special guest today Lauren Lapkus first of all good job way to go because all of the things that you did that's great you went after what you said

what you wanted you got what you wanted and then you had a nice experience where you were sexually free it sounds like right it sounded amazing yeah it sounded great and then and then when you told him that you wanted a relationship he said or that you were having stronger feelings like how did you reframe it. Well, he basically made me realize that I was kind of done with this phase of my life. And I thought I owed it to myself to tell him how I was feeling. And he nicely rejected me in a way like we're still fine. No hard feelings. I was having more anxiety over the fact that I was keeping this kind of like a secret and I had to let it out. But yeah, I ended it. So your question is how to move. I mean, everything you said is awesome. Like that is female empowerment. You know what I mean? Like, so just don't let that skate by. Like you had feelings. You told him how you felt. You're a big girl. He didn't reciprocate. That's all OK. But you still you know what I mean? Like you did all of the things that you should that a woman who is empowered would do.

So first of all, kudos to you for that. Don't negate that or because it didn't work out in a situation like that you wanted. Don't negate all the positives that have come out of it. And also the positives of like being really vulnerable with him and allowing him to compliment you and the things that you usually wouldn't really let happen. Like, I feel like that's also a huge sign of growth to let yourself let something else in. I mean, I feel it feels like your next person that will be, you know, you'll be more primed for that from this experience. Yeah, I like that. Well, absolutely. Because, you know, he gave you a gift. Like your gift is now that you want to now, you know, you want to be in a more serious relationship and possibly look for a partner. And that's a gift also. Like everything is good that happened. So first of all, frame it in your mind in a different way. Or I don't know, maybe you were already framing it as a positive thing. But I just want to remind you about the positive aspect of all of those things. And then as you're moving forward, I guess, what is your question? How do you move forward looking for someone more permanent?

it? I honestly don't even know how to date seriously. I've always just slept around because I'm just so scared of getting hurt and I'm so scared of rejection. And I just have very, I have a lot of anxiety around dating. And I guess my question is to how do I date? I guess, I don't know. I guess I just honestly need to be more honest with myself and what I want. but that is my question how do i learn how to date seriously without like you know kind of i guess putting sex to the side for a little while i guess i mean it sounded like it was a really natural progression with this guy even if it was not into a full relationship but that like you got along really well and it was sort of a natural thing to like hook up i feel like that is dating like

if it when you don't when it's not like through an app and you're meeting someone and going out to dinner or whatever, like you meet people in your life and you have chemistry and then you can try to take it to the next place. But also the people in your life that you know can often become people that are really, you know, right for you. You might not know them yet. Yeah. And I also want to say like, okay, so you think about dating, right? You're going on a date with somebody. Say you go on a date with them. The anxiety around all of that. Let's talk about that. So say the date goes well. Great. Then you go on another date with them and say that date doesn't go well okay so then that's over that's the worst thing that you know what I mean like

that's the end result like the worst possible outcome for you not the worst possible outcome but the outcome that you wouldn't welcome is to not find someone right but it's a trial and error process so like say you go out on a date with somebody and it's not a great match you don't have a lot of chemistry or you like him and he doesn't like you so what that's the worst thing that's going to happen on that date do you know what I mean yeah and it helps to like if like for my friends who have are newly single and getting back out there and stuff and having that sort of same experience of like okay i have to like date i do know that like my friends who have gone through that going on more dates is helpful because you're like the stakes are lower where

you're just like oh i'm just gonna meet this person and see if maybe they're cool and if they're not cool then i don't even have to stay like you don't have to like have a meal you don't have to like do all of that you can make it a drink and then leave after one drink like if they suck it doesn't have to be like a huge investment of like your time and your personality and like giving a lot up and another tip I liked that my friend did was she got herself like a few date outfits that she just felt really amazing in and she just wears them for every date like it doesn't have to be like you have a new cute look every time it's like I love this dress on me I'm just gonna wear this every time I go on a first date or whatever and it kind of takes away one step

of like what am I gonna wear how am I gonna look what am I gonna do and you can just like feel confident so I do like that tip yeah and also having the intention the intention of wanting to pursue a more regular relationship, you're already putting it out there. You called into this podcast, you're actually energetically moving yourself towards that goal just by talking about it. And so then it's going to become a reality. It's like a trial and error. Like it's a good exercise and good practice to go on dates with several men anyway. Like what's the worst thing that can happen there? I mean, I don't want to say what's the worst thing because, you know, weird things can happen. But I mean, in terms of your self-esteem and rejection and the issues

that are surrounding what you're talking about, I really think it's actually a good exercise for you to actually go on dates with people that aren't going to end with you having sex. Just get into the habit of doing that and then you're creating a new habit. And if someone doesn't like you, great. There's 8 billion people on this planet now, I think.

Is that the number we're dealing with? Yeah, I think that's, yeah. 8 billion? So, you know, some of those people you'll run into, but a lot of them you will run into, you know? So I just want you to think about it in a different way. Like this is exciting. You had this interaction and guess what? This interaction with this colleague spurred the interest in you to actually look for something more permanent

and like kind of a partner. This is an exciting development as well. So everything moved towards like with the attitude of opportunity and experience. And don't worry about being rejected. Listen, the more rejections, our lives are based in rejection. If you are a celebrity, you have been rejected multiple multiple multiple times lauren you can every day every day is a new rejection every day someone doesn't like you levels of it and guess what it makes you it makes it matter a lot less though it like it makes you you have like thicker skin but you just care less like i just get less invested in the thing i have my high hopes about like i which might sound depressing but i actually think it's good like i just it i'm not sobbing every time something

doesn't work out. I'm like, okay, I kind of assumed that was going to happen. Because that happens all the time. It just takes it off your, you know, shoulders as being like, this has to be the perfect thing. It's good, you're going to have a bunch of dates where you don't even like that person, like, and you get to be the one who says that I don't want to go out again. Like, yeah, you it's on you too, you know, which is great. It's a great power. Well, and you also just went through this thing that had sort of a negative outcome. And like, look how amazingly you handled it. You were like, Oh, maybe I'm growing beyond this. And want to do something different. That's awesome. Right. And also the other thing I want to say

about rejection is it does build character. It builds strength and it builds character. So I always, any rejection I get, I'm like, great, thank you. Thank you for that note. I'm going to be even greater at being myself, you know? And also one other thing I want to say is when you go on these dates, don't go in there trying to get them to like you. Go in there and see if you like them. I always like, I put too much pressure on it and I kind of like drive myself nuts. right yeah look I'm being like oh maybe this is the guy maybe this is the guy and I like I create this like false hope in my head and it I just always set myself up for failure so yeah I feel like the apps do that too because like when you're talking to someone without meeting them

you kind of can start creating what they're like and then you meet them and they're not like that and then that's disappointing or something it's a tough thing to deal with where we're sort of like interacting on in this way that feels like so disconnected and then you're kind of looking at a picture that they've decided is like what they're like you know what I mean it's a lot of it's a lot of expectation that everyone's putting into it but I think as much as you can take that with a grain of salt when you're meeting somebody and just try to just not even think too hard about what they're gonna be like before you go out don't build them up at all because nobody can live up to like whatever thing you made up even if they're amazing it's like you already went in a different

direction with it and then they're weird to you or something I don't know I think that happens but again, I have not been on an app in ever and I've only been married my whole life. So multiple times. She's been married eight times. That's why she's here to give advice. Does any of that help you? Yeah, it does. Thank you. Great. Okay. Well, yeah. And just remember, the more dates, the better. Like have a fun experience dating. It is a numbers game. And you're going to find a lot of people you like probably, probably more than one. that's a fun problem to have i know i love it all right carly get out there and uh keep us posted and let us know what happens good luck much thank you thanks bye well our next question

comes from shauna this one is just an email this is my sister i mean let's hope so she writes in too much she says dear chelsea i've been married to my wonderful husband for 14 years he's an excellent dad and a great husband, and I don't want anyone else. Here is our problem. We have vastly different sex drives. We have two children, ages 6 and 13. Our first child was born about a year into our relationship, and I realized about three years into our relationship that I'm gray asexual, meaning I generally don't have that much of a sex drive at all, but it can come and go a bit. My husband, on the other hand, has a normal sex drive for a 40-year-old man and would like to have sex a couple times a week, which doesn't seem unreasonable. But honestly, if I had sex as

much as I needed to, it would be a few times a year. Specifically, in order to want sex, I need the kids to basically be gone. It's very difficult for me to be relaxed enough to want to have sex when I know that the kids could be knocking on the door at any second, especially since my daughter has panic attacks. We don't have the money for a babysitter and can only send them to their grandparents every so often. I know this sounds bad, but how do I go about having enough sex with him to keep him satisfied without feeling like i'm having way more sex than i want to to keep him happy i don't want him to be unhappy in our relationship and he isn't interested in a hall pass he wants me i wish i didn't have to feel guilty all the time he's very patient but i can't

help but feel bad that he's not getting his needs met shauna oh i would say a exploit that grandparents relationship as much as you can like i know you said she said in the letter that you can't go they can't go there all the time but is there any way they could go there a little bit more frequently because then that becomes your date night and that becomes your thing and i'm sure you know if you can arrange that i think that would be a really healthy addition to your like schedule and your sex schedule with your husband it's really sweet that you're that you care so much about satisfying his needs but also you know the kids go to bed at a certain time so if you pick out a night of the week, like, okay, Saturday nights, we're every Saturday, we're going to do,

you know, we're going to make sure the kids are in bed by this time. Or even if it's a Tuesday, it doesn't matter. But if you create a regular consistency, then it doesn't feel like I understand that that can create its own pressure, but you're a willing participant, you're saying that you want to actually like meet your husband's needs. And you don't have to meet all of his needs or everyone's needs at all. But if you want to make the effort, those are two simple ways to make an effort, you know, because the girls, I mean, your six-year-old and your 13-year-old obviously are going to go to, are going to be asleep by hopefully like 11 o'clock, right? I mean, there's a night where you can stay up and say, and then it kind of makes it more adventurous

and more fun. We have to wait for the kids to go to sleep and da-da-da, or have them go to a sleepover at their friend's house. Anytime they have a sleepover, you can, you know, flirt with him and be like, this is our night. This is our night, you know, like make it more of an event instead of a schedule yeah and if they're ever at school and then you're ever at home i don't know what your schedule is like but that's a time of day when it's also possible or send your kids to night school you can send them to school at night yeah i thought it was really nice that she even said he's not interested in a hall pass because it means she offered that which is very generous not everyone would want to do that you obviously care about him a lot and it's i'm

curious what he thinks about it because it she didn't mention him being particularly unsatisfied It was more that he wishes it was more, you know what I mean? Which is kind of a different thing. It doesn't seem like it's a, maybe a problem for him, but something that he's like, it'd be cool if we did that more. Yeah. And also like these feelings of this, like this kind of anxious, I know you said that hers, she said her daughter has panic attacks, like all of those anxious feelings around

the sex. It's like, it helps to kind of separate all of that from sex. Like you're making them more related than they need to be to the sex. you can have sex with your husband without your daughter knocking on your door because she's having a panic attack like that's an exception not the rule so i would just kind of flip your way of thinking about it like oh think of ways to make this more exciting not only for your husband for you you want to get you know you're the one who's in a gray kind of asexual area which is totally fine listen we all have different kind of sexual appetites and we also go through different

phases you never know what's around the corner you could become a huge horn dog when you go if you're menopausal, you know, or postmenopausal or perimenopausal, who knows? But I would definitely just try to, not just, but one of the things I would do is try to reframe how you're looking at the sex and make it more of a fun activity and even a fun activity that you're initiating. I think that's great because it also helps to take the pressure off of the actual sex when it's happening. Because if you're thinking like, oh my God, she's going to have a panic attack while this is happening, like you're not going to be able to enjoy yourself. So working to like separate that before it's even happening is probably smart yeah yeah and also

like i was reading this thing recently about sex you know how we always like i know this is true for me when i was young like always wanted to like a conquest i always wanted to like if i didn't have sex with a guy it didn't mean you know like i didn't i didn't like i had this very male look out outlook towards it and i also we all kind of think about sex as something that you know you have to climax and that's the completion of the act and it's like sex is a lot more than that it's about being affectionate and it's about having intimacy and it's about you know rolling around with someone in bed and flirting and having fun with your partner and it doesn't always have to lead to an orgasm you know what i mean like you're pleasuring each other you're doing whatever

you're doing if you're having oral sex you know it doesn't always have to lead like that it's it's about the togetherness. And I think if you make an effort in that direction to move closer to your husband in an intimate way, you'll also feel the effect that will feel like the effects of actually having sex more. Yeah. Yeah. And to that end, you know, you might not feel like you want him in your space or touching you as much twice a week, once a week. But, you know, doing something like oral sex, like being able to satisfy him in a way that like you don't necessarily need to be touched might be something that works for you. So maybe experiment with some of that. Yeah. And just let your husband know, since you care so much about, you know, pleasing him,

like let him know that these are all things you're working on and that you want to be closer. You know, I like the flirting aspects because that's so easy to do, to be flirting with your husband, you know, to make sure you're giving him an extra hug, giving him an extra kiss, touching him, you know, when you don't need to. All of those things add up and they make people feel closer. so it's worthwhile yeah yeah but I think they do that I do that sometimes where I don't um I'll think about something and then not follow through on it or not say it out loud and then I'll act in my mind as if it happened do you know like it's like I'm thinking so much about this thing that I'm like oh obviously he knows what I'm thinking about and that's not true people can't read your

mind so that's also that's great advice because I do think saying making a point to do the actions more but also saying out loud like this matters to me so much like I just want you to know I really care about this like so that it's not just something that lives in your head yeah and oh one more thing I want to say about this. When you have a negative reaction to sex or the thought of sex, that goes a long way as well. Your thoughts are important. They do matter. So when you start thinking about it, it's almost like you have to trick yourself into being like, oh, this is going to be fun. I'm going to do, you know, like, not like, oh, fuck, I got to do this again. You know, like, so just start thinking about ways to make it more playful, ways to make it more fun, and you

will change your attitude about it. That's a fact. Yeah. There is one thing else I want to say about the panic attacks, because say your daughter does wake up in the middle of the night and you guys are getting frisky or whatever and you can't get the kids out of the house, but you do want to get together. If your daughter knocks on your door, really like the time between having sex and being able to address that is like you just have to put on a house coat. So true. Like you know how to handle it you can be there in like two extra seconds and it'll be okay exactly it will be okay yeah all right problem solved problem solved oh i can't believe my sister's writing in about this stuff i mean honestly i'm gonna bring this up at thanksgiving in front of the whole

family absolutely that's when they caught me masturbating in front of my family and my whole family caught me masturbating on thanksgiving so it's a full circle moment yeah so jen asks Dear Chelsea, my partner and I have been together over 10 years. We met in college and have worked really hard on our relationship and have created a really healthy partnership. We're headed into our 30s this year, and for the first time, it kind of feels like we are actually, in fact, adults. We live in a growing city, and both of us are working hard on our careers, though I'm definitely the more career-driven of the two of us. In the past two years, my partner has casually brought up that he wants at least one child. This is a bit unsettling to me because I've said from day one,

before we ever started dating that I have no interest in having children. I've felt this way my entire life, and until recently, he always seemed to be on the same page. He's always agreed when I've said I'm never having children and has always expressed disinterest in them as well. This puts me in an extremely difficult position because it's not like I hate my boyfriend and can tell him to fuck off. I am very much in love with him and respect him and now feel like if we don't bring a child into this relationship one way or another, I may be holding him back from fulfilling a bigger purpose. But no matter how many times I try to visualize my life with a child in it, it still doesn't sound like something I want for myself. I'm perfectly fulfilled by my relationship

with him, my close friends, and my career. I need some serious perspective on this. Jen. Ooh, what do you think, Lauren? Oh my God, it's so intense. I mean, I do think it sounds like she really knows that she doesn't want kids. And that is such a huge thing to change your mind on and you can't really be convinced by someone else i don't think i mean i'm sure it's happened but i feel like how long have they been together 10 years oh god yeah i know that's so hard she loves him so much um that is really hard i don't know chelsea do you have ideas you don't have kids and i feel like maybe you know about like the feeling of like knowing that you know yeah i do i do i wouldn't i wouldn't have a kid because you know even if i i mean i can't

speak to being in a 10 year relationship because I haven't been and neither can Lauren because she's been divorced like 16 times. But I would say that no child deserves to be born because because someone else wants one and you're just agreeing like you have to be 150 percent into having a baby if you're going to have a baby. And anything less than that is unacceptable in terms of, you know, children having to deal with their parents, resentment, guilt and all that other stuff. The world is hard enough. So it's not fair to just do that for someone else because you're not really doing that person. You're doing that person a solid initially. And what ends up happening is your resentment, a child's resentment, all of that stuff. So you can't have a baby unless

you want to have a baby. And a 10 year relationship is really difficult. But I think, you know, if this isn't negotiable, which it doesn't sound like it is, then I think your partner is going to be unfulfilled. And he's also going to be resentful. And I think you have to be a person to just say, listen, I'm not willing to do this. I don't want to stop you from doing this. I love you. I want this relationship to continue, obviously. But if I'm going to prohibit you from fulfilling one of your dreams, I love you too much to do something like that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to prevent you. And I know you want to go find someone. So you have to deal with that. It's a very difficult decision to make but I think it's the right thing to do I know it sounds so hard to

end a relationship that you're happy in yeah you know that just for any reason and then that but that reason would build resentment over time and I think also what's kind of interesting I mean depends on I don't know what it depends on but thinking about the length of time a relationship can make you think like well I could never have this again or I can never start over or how would I ever you know being in 10 years you're like then we're supposed to be together forever that that's not true of everything and you can be really happy and find the person that is totally perfect for you and so I mean it's really hard though because we're talking about someone who's in love with somebody so I mean I don't I don't even know how you can that just sounds so hard

to have to end something but it also I think Chelsea's right that like when you're saying the resentment that would build from that when you really love someone you want them to fulfill their dreams. And I think when you say that, actually, you act in such an honorable way because it is painful to end such a long relationship. But when you act in honor of someone and honor that relationship by saying, I don't want to hold you back in any way and this just isn't for me, I honestly think you get rewarded in life. When you really treat something with dignity and respect, then that's what comes back at you. And that's not going to help you through a painful breakup but it is kind of if you look at the big picture of life it would be

the right thing to do yeah and i think part of this conversation too is finding out from him is this a deal breaker for you or are these just kind of casual comments i mean yeah right absolutely is it a deal breaker is it i mean i i read from that letter that it was yeah i mean that's what i would assume but yeah yeah yeah yeah so here we are wrecking relationships Relationships. Relationship wrecker. That's my middle name. Relationship wrecker.

Yeah. Well, keep us posted, Jen. Double barrel. Okay. We'll take a break and we'll be right back. The Jonas Brothers are running it back. We live the burning up tour and celebrate the biggest Jonas Brothers hits

that have defined a generation. One incredible celebration. One unforgettable night. See the Jonas Brothers live at RBC Amphitheater, September 28th. Get tickets now at Ticketmaster.ca. Jonas Brothers, the burning up tour all over again. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and held captive for nine months. I survived, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them.

I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are the Survivor Files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up, without a doubt, he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed, and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club part group chat for thought daughters pop culture obsessives and anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse i'm eli rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books the internet and the conversations everyone can't stop having i'm gonna have to look up this story i'm obsessed i'm obsessed from best-selling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments nothing is off the table it's Like, if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse.

Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility.

Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip, I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Can you help me shape this? How about we flip it on its head? How about we flip the script? What if the surprise woman, who actually you think is the straight man, is actually the one who's acting weird? Adam Scott. This entire time, you've been expecting Adam Sandler to come to visit the show. I would never expect.

Let go of that. I would never set expectations for something like that to happen. like if the universe allows for something like that to happen i'm open to it i'm always going to accept you know danny mcbride fine yeah it's all this fragile masculinity exuding i could smell it walking down the hallway to be honest with you i was like is that weed nope it's fragile masculinity ben stiller no because a lot of times in out of context people don't get it or even know what a circle is you know what i mean like you're like oh what's this david everyone's so dumb except for you fake right fake and and also not interested or just like oh i've got my life i

don't care about your life and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us oh and by the way will ferrell told us personally he loves the show and he wants to be a guest on every episode but he's just so busy listen to hollywood handbook on the i heart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts And we're back to close it up with Lauren Lapkus. So, Lauren, what's the name of your podcast again? It's called Haunting. It's Haunting.

It comes out every Tuesday on iHeart or wherever you get your podcasts. It's very fun. Okay, so Haunting is her new podcast, is Lauren's new podcast. It comes out every Tuesday on iHeart, like you're listening to right now, which is iHeart. And then Another Happy Day.

It's out now. You can get it on Apple TV or Prime or some other places, but it is available for your viewing pleasure. now. Yes. I always love watching you in anything, Lauren. Thank you so much. You're so unique and original and it's nice and refreshing always to see your face. Thank you. I always have a special place for you because you gave me my big break. That show was like the biggest, most exciting thing ever. I had never been on a TV show before. So it was thrilling. I love it. Oh, good. I'm so happy to hear that. Yeah. Okay, Hattie, take care. Awesome. Thanks so much. Thanks for having me.

Bye. Okay, so upcoming shows that I have, you guys. I'm coming to Texas. And then I will be in Las Vegas performing at the Chelsea Theater inside the Cosmopolitan Hotel. I'm coming to Brooklyn, New York at the King's Theater on November 8th.

And I have tickets on sale throughout the end of the year in December. So if you're in a city like Philadelphia or Bethlehem or San Diego or New Orleans or Omaha? Check ChelseaHandler.com for tickets. Okay. If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email at DearChelseaPodcast at gmail.com and be sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert, executive producer, Catherine Law. And be sure to check out our merch at ChelseaHandler.com.

I survived nine months in captivity and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them i'm elizabeth smart and these are the survivor files every week i'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable abducted stalked controlled and nearly silenced these are stories about what it takes to make it out alive listen to the survivor files with elizabeth smart on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts hey this is hayes davenport and sean clements we host the podcast hollywood handbook each week we talk to someone in show business and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us everyone has a good time and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our

show we've had a lot of great guests like sarah sherman adam scott danny mcbride ben stiller and a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us listen to hollywood handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast

that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. Yeah, I'm obsessed, I'm obsessed.

Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I choose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Burr. I don't think I've ever met somebody so exactly out of their mind as I am. And now we

even have more great guests coming up, including the great John Turturro. It's called happiness, delivering happiness and many, many more. Open your free iHeartRadio app, search delivering happiness with Nick Turturro and listen now. This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.