Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler - The Gut-Vagina Connection with Lo Bosworth

Episode Date: January 9, 2025

  Lo Bosworth joins Chelsea to talk about the gut-vagina connection, leaky gut, and building a successful business from the ground up.  Then: A New Yorker’s lack of motivation has her feeling down and out.  A hairdresser exceeds her goals and isn’t sure what’s next.  And a girlfriend can get over the cheating… but can she forgive the lies? * Find Lo’s line of supplements at lovewellness.com! * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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And I guess I can share that, uh, no way. Listen to the latest episode of Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. Pro Society is a weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. Each week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and pop culture with your favorite writers, book talk creators, and plenty of overthought opinions. Yeah, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, Catherine. Hi, Chelsea.

Hi, hi, everybody. I just, we're in L.A. with the fires, and... You flew back just in time for this, in fact. I flew back just in time for the fires. I was with my nieces all week in Whistler, and I flew back to host the Critics' Choice Awards, which are being postponed now due to the fires. And we landed, and she was like,

did you see the fire we flew through? And I was like, one of my nieces. And I'm like, what? And then I didn't have Wi-Fi on the flight. I was reading, and I saw, and then I saw my phone, and I was like, oh, my God. And so I'm in a hotel like everyone else in Los Angeles, and Critics' Choice Awards, I'm getting postponed, obviously, to January 26th. Okay.

I am probably going to turn around and go back to Whistler since this is a disaster. Okay. And there's really nothing for me to do here. We had to evacuate my street, but I don't know what's going on on my street. The pictures in the Palisades are so devastating. You'll see one house that's burned and then the one next to it is fine and then the one next to that is burned. I mean, it's just like it's so random and devastating and all-consuming and just really awful. Wow.

I mean, yikes. Yeah. So fires are just the worst thing to watch, you know, like seeing and how they catch and how they spread. Like the whole Palisades is just fucking destroyed. I just got a text from my boss that his house is gone. Like, literally just right now. Oh, my God. But he and his wife and baby got out yesterday.

Yeah, thank goodness. It's like you look for these silver linings. It doesn't make it any less devastating, but there you have it. What's the silver lining? Oh, that they got out. Yeah, where's one? I'd like one. Can we just, like, find that, please?

Well, we have our guest today that we prerecorded this a while ago. So this episode is a lot about vaginal wellness. For those of you who are listening and who are not impacted by the fires and who want to learn more about your Pikachu, here's an episode for you. Please welcome Lo Bosworth. Hello, gorgeous gaggle of girls on a couch. Hello, hello. Lo Bosworth, hello.

Hi, how are you? I'm ready to talk about vaginal wellness. I'm ready to talk about female wellness, vaginal wellness, anal wellness. I mean, if we have anything to cover on that, we want to just be well. We want to be well. And we have you here today to talk about all of the amazing things that you've accomplished with your company. Yes.

Thank you for having me. I don't know if you remember, but I was on your show on E! a really long time ago, once when I was on The Hills, and I was so scared to come on your show because I was so intimidated. how was it how was the experience was i nice scary it was scary as fuck was it was i nice to you you were very nice yes i don't know why people are so intimidated by me i mean i i do know but i didn't know for so long what the problem was i was like god everyone would say that to me like you're so scary you're so scary and i'm like i actually still don't really quite get it but that's for another time i guess you're a strong funny woman and i think people don't want

to be don't want them don't want you to like point out their obvious areas of opportunity yes right yes you know what that was probably the most eloquent way you could put it so thank you for saying it so i didn't have to say it in eloquently but good to know and i i accept this i accept this badge of whatever it is because i understand but i'm glad that i'm getting to see you again anyway and i was gonna say have i interviewed you on chelsea lately because I had so many interviews in the span of my career with all of the talk shows that I've done that sometimes I meet people and I can't tell like I had me neither I had Christina Ricci on the other week we had her on the podcast and I was looking at her sitting here looking at her face going

I never forget a face and I'm like I couldn't remember whether or not I had interviewed her and I was looking at her face and I'm like her face is a very unusual you know she has a very unique face yeah and and while I was looking at I'm like I know I haven't seen this face face to face before you know and so I was like oh and then she said no I was never on your show I'm like okay that much I know so anyway Lo Bosworth you obviously people would have become familiar with you a long time ago from a show you were on called The Hills which was like probably the first reality show really or Laguna Beach before that oh yeah it was early Laguna Beach I don't know if you remember that but that was 20 years ago we started where it debuted in 2004 which is when I

graduated high school and then started college. So yeah, a full 20 years ago, Laguna came on the air and then the Hills followed that. So it's been a while. Listen, you made a career out of being on a reality show. That wasn't a thing before. I mean, it's a thing now, but you were able to parlay that into something meaningful and great. So fucking good for you and congratulations. Thank you. Yeah. I've been working on Love Wellness for going on nine years now, which is just blows my mind. I don't think I've been able to commit that long to anything in my life. Yeah, that is a long time. I'm really passionate about women's wellness. And I started the company out of, you know, really my own need for better products in the healthcare

space. And I really, to be honest with you, was determined not to be a reality television personality forever as my byline. And now I realize it probably just will be anyway. So whatever I've kind of moved past that but I think coming off that show I had so much trauma and I'm sure you talked to a lot of people who are on reality that have such traumatic experiences on it and for a long time in the early days of reality those stories were not really validated they were pushed to the side it was like well you're famous so like shut up about your feelings But now I think there is a better understanding just how like manipulative and terrible those shows can be, you know, on people's psyche. And I started my business really as sort of a second chance at life, to be honest with you.

Like I had to get away from L.A. I moved to New York and I really I really started my life over again. Wow. Yeah. And I had read, too, that you use sort of like the last bit of your earnings from the show to develop this product. line and start the business, right? That's so cool. I did. And I just want to say that our business is now worth, I mean, you guys made, I think I'd said a hundred million dollars this year, right? Or it's evaluated at a hundred million dollars. It's evaluated more than that, but I'm, we can't talk, we can't talk about our revenue yet for 2024, but we're doing very well. Okay. Well, I just wanted to say it's very successful. So that's the point we're trying to get across. Yeah. So tell us, okay, give us your backstory. Like what happened? What kind of

like, what was your issue that led you to discover and launch this kind of brand? So I was in a really terribly sad, emotionally abusive, romantic relationship. And in that relationship, I was very depressed and very anxious. And I also had a whole host of women's health issues, urinary tract infections yeast infections and it was like chronic I was just always sick and there was really a tipping point for me though where I was normal one day and then the next day I was just not I was like lay on the floor depressed like go home to my mommy for three months depressed kind of a thing and I was going to the doctor over and over and over again and trying to advocate for myself and just being told that you know here's some Prozac you need to exercise more

drink more water whatever the typical medical gaslighting that I think a lot of women experience and have historically experienced in this country for a very long time it wasn't until I was 18 months into this health journey of trying to understand why I was okay one day and then so not okay kind of the overnight that my GP finally agreed to just do a blood panel and test my vitamin levels, like the most basic blood test you can do. And it came back as like deficient, deficient, deficient, deficient. It was overwhelming, but it was my very first data point that there was something physiologically wrong with me. And I wasn't making it up because I was being made to feel that I was just making all of this stuff up. And so with that first data

point that I was dealing with these vitamin deficiencies, I actually had some information to go on, right? And then I kind of took that information to better doctors that were approaching health care from a more holistic point of view, which is, I think, becoming more popular in our health care system here. But you still have a lot of doctors very focused on their primary area that they focus on. And so I was looking for a gynecologist, say, that could help me connect the dots better between vaginal health issues and gut health issues or the brain stuff that I was experiencing. And finally got a health care team in place that said, you know, I think that actually all of these things are connected. I think that you have a gut health issue because you're the

antibiotic generation. I was born in 1986. For every little thing, we took an antibiotic. Oh, I take antibiotics all the time. Yeah. We were raised on goldfish crackers from Costco. I love a goldfish cracker. And we have messed up gut microbiomes. And as a result, we have vitamin deficiencies. we have anxiety and depression because of leaky gut and the connection between the gut and the brain and that blood-brain barrier and then from the gut to the vagina we have gut dysbiosis that results in vaginal health issues because the gut microbiome and the vaginal microbiome talk to each other it's called quorum sensing the gut bacteria literally tell your vagina bacteria hey like we're

in good health here you should be in good health down there or the inverse which is crazy and so i finally started to understand what was going on in my body but this was like 2015 there was still a lot of emerging research on just the gut microbiome coming out very little on the vaginal microbiome that took kind of like the course of my business up until this point to get better understanding and research on women's microbiomes but started developed products based off of the holistic recommendations of some excellent doctors that were as simple as take a probiotic, use an intimate cleanser without fragrance. And it was these simple solutions that actually really like made such a pivotal change in my health and allowed me to get better. And I decided I'm going to launch

a business with a focus on these white space innovation types of products for women that really can fundamentally change the game for how we take care of our bodies at an accessible price point in everyday types of stores, right? And it was 2016 when I launched the company. It was right after the presidential election in 2016. And yeah, here we are. Eight years later. Many years later. In an interestingly similar place. I am curious about when you talk about leaky gut. So obviously you changed the vitamins that you were taking, the probiotics and that sort of thing. Did you Do any sort of protocols to address leaky gut or anything like that? Yeah.

So, you know, when I was kind of initially going through this discovery, my doctors thought, well, maybe you have some food intolerances, things like that. And I certainly do, but I'm also a human and still sometimes eat through those things anyway. And the only way to really find out if you have a food allergy or an intolerance is to do a diet where you eliminate that thing from your diet for a significant period of time. And I did that with gluten. And I was pretty surprised when I reintroduced gluten how negatively affected I was. Because the reality is if you're eating something that you have an intolerance to every single day over time, your reaction to it is not going to be very big. It's

going to be kind of consistent. You kind of get to that like baseline kind of reaction. It's brain fog, it's bloating, whatever. But when I eliminated gluten from my diet and then reintroduced it, I like got vertigo. I got like horribly sick. I was like, oh my gosh, I really have a gluten problem. But yeah, elimination diets are really kind of the gold standard for understanding if you have some kind of food issue. How long do you think it takes like when you eliminate something like gluten for you to actually feel the results of that, the impact that it has on your body? The positive benefits? I think within a week, you probably start to feel the positive benefits of it if you have a food intolerance to that thing. Do I think you get max benefits in a month? Maybe,

probably longer than that. I think if you've been eating something, you have an intolerance to your entire life it's going to take a while for your body to heal from all of that inflammation because i just feel like isn't everyone intolerant of i mean not intolerant but kind of allergic yeah gluten well there because we put of all the shit we put it in and put in this when i eat bread in other countries i don't have the same specifically in the u.s i think you're right like who whose body that's along with that well the thing is what we use in the u.s has about like seven or eight times the gluten of the wheat that we evolved eating over 10 000 years so our body is Oh, really?

It does. It's usually a GMO, and it was made to help feed the world. The scientists who created it was like, this is amazing. It's going to help feed all these poor-serving kids in these countries, and we're eating it here in the U.S., and that's why you go to Italy or whatever. I don't have any reaction to gluten in Italy or France or any of those places, but here it's like I can eat Italian flour that I'm making here, pasta or bread or whatever. I'm fine.

The second I eat something that is like U.S. bread flour, it's over for me in about 20 minutes. Big agriculture for you. We're agrarians over here, Lo. We're agrarians. I'm a government official for the agriculture department. Can you imagine? If someone said you have to get up and speak about that for an hour, I'd be like, you better give me a bong hit stat. So, okay.

And so then launching that, because I've tried, I've been in, you know, where you've tried to launch a business. And I just, it is so fucking arduous to get something off the ground that anyone who's been able to do it successfully, I'm just in like awe of. You know, I'm pretty relentless. Yeah, you sound like you really have your shit together. I really love the subject matter. Like, I love biology. I love the human body. I am just fascinated by it.

And I think if you get into any business and you really want to be in it for the long haul, you have to really love what you're doing. And I actually gave up the CEO role in my business last March or March of 2023 so that I could focus on innovation, regulatory, marketing, the stuff that I'm really, really passionate about. Because to be honest with you, the CEO job is a tough job. I was a CEO for the first seven years of my business and was able to successfully grow and guide that business as a first-time founder and CEO to a pretty significant size. I'm so proud of my accomplishment. But to really scale the business, to be a major player in Walmart and in Target, which are our retail partners, you have to have done that before.

and with success. It's really hard to walk into the room at Walmart, never having ever been there before and say like, trust me and I can deliver products on time. And like, I know about all the margins and you know, all the coupons and stuff you guys want to do. No, no. Like being an owner or an operator of consumer brand means that you really have to have done it before, or you have to be willing to bring on a team that has done it before that can help you. And so that's where I'm really at now in terms of kind of my journey with the business. I don't have to do one-on-ones anymore, thank God, but I'm still really focused on all the product innovation and really a lot of regulatory work. We sit in a very interesting category in supplements and cosmetics that's not

actually regulated by the FDA in terms of like ingredients or safety, really just in terms of claims. And there's like a big consumer misconception that the FDA is all over these products in terms of like safety and stuff, but they're not. And it's really on brands to do the self-regulation. So that's one of my kind of missions is to make really clean, you know efficacious products for women in a category of a lot of frankly just like bullshit because a lot of brands will just sell you a gummy vitamin and say it works it's gonna like solve all your problems when they won't and how are you as a consumer supposed to know which brands are full of shit and which brands aren't it's so hard it's it's truly so hard it's like

i'm not reading any of these fucking labels you know what i mean like and i wouldn't even know to be looking for i just do it a challenge yeah you know a lot of brands now tout like oh like clinically studied ingredients but like they don't actually have necessarily like the clinically proven amount of that ingredient in a product or the formulation that works best you know even like coq10 is something i started taking recently and there's like five different kinds and like one is very accessible by your body and like the rest are not you know so you have to take way more and it's sort of like on a case-by-case basis I think you know I want to believe that most brands are trying to do right by the consumer what I will say is that well don't don't assume that because

they're not I mean we know that's not true I know but in this category like I want to believe that right I want to believe that if a woman starts a business for women's health in her heart she has good intentions in mind for her customer base yes I don't think that that is always the case and I can think of a few examples where that's specifically not the case but I have to to just to be able to like get up and operate every single day and live in the earth that we're living in have some hope about the the innate goodness in people you know what I mean yeah it's called lovewellness.com for people who want to go and order stuff from her company because I like the idea of having your own health issues and then finding a solution, which is the impetus for

starting a company. I think that's a very natural kind of like linear thing to do. And I think you're right about female founders. I mean, I think for the most part, you know, women's it's like it's we know we're not handed anything. You have to actually actively go and work probably twice as hard as a man to start a company to get the Cardi B said 10 times as hard the other day. And I I thought, yes, Cardi B, it's 10 times as hard. Well, she's always been better at math than I have. So we'll take her. I'll take whatever she says.

Yeah. So what's happening with your personal life? You're not married, right? I have a fabulous partner. He's great. We live together. Great. We're in love.

Oh, great. I love that. You don't have kids. No. No, no kids. I can tell by the look on someone's face if they have children. I look so rested to you, Donna. It's just glowing.

I'm kidding. No, we would love to have children. But not, not yet. What, I want to go back to- But maybe soon, but maybe soon. Okay, okay. Well, that's obviously a pregnancy announcement. It's not.

It's absolutely not. What is leaky gut exactly? I hear a lot about leaky gut, but like what physicality does that take on in your body? Like what happens? I might, I'll probably let Lo take this, but it's a lot of inflammation and other stuff, right? Is something actually leaking from your gut?

Yeah, so like, think of it, like when you eat food and imagine if in that food there was like some like weird bacteria or something like let's say you ate fish okay i'm giving you like a very like basic example let's let's say that there's some like weird bacteria in the fish that you ate and because you keep eating foods that are inflammatory to your body your gut wall lining may have like tiny little gaps in it right and that like weird bad thing may be able to get through that gap get into your bloodstream and then go up to your brain. And if it's small enough, penetrate the blood-brain barrier and theoretically affect your brain health. And so that's like at the macro level,

the concept of leaky gut. Yeah. You should be on Grey's Anatomy, Lo. She's very well researched. Seriously. I mean, that's actually great. I've been wondering what leaky gut is for a long time. By the way, it sounds, I assumed it had something to do with your asshole like that your gut gets your asshole that's a disaster you know it turns into a shit storm i mean it could cause you to have like a lot of diarrhea and stomach upset if you have leaky gut to be honest with you because you're probably your stomach is probably so inflamed from all the weird stuff that your body like doesn't agree with or you're putting into it but it's just there's a lot of like vaginal health talk that we're having these days when you know

you never think about how healthy your vagina is unless there's something wrong unless there's an issue it's not like you're like oh i always like to tell the team it's like when you don't notice anything like that's the ideal state right right yeah it's like when you don't know what's what's anything's amiss that's like where you want to be that's the healthy state what i think is cool about the vagina is that it's actually an immunity organ and very few people know that or think about it that way but it is right there's a lot of talk about vaginal ph levels that's like very like you know that terminology is used a lot now vaginal ph is acidic because it protects you from overgrowth of bad bacteria or bad yeast or pathogens things like that because like

guess what the vagina like is the entrance up into your uterus right like it's your fertility kingdom up in there and so your vagina is protecting you from bad things that come and invade but the vagina is very smart the vagina will attack things that are not self right like you know a bad bacteria or you know a bad pathogen that like doesn't come from you but it will not attack sperm it knows that sperm is not self but it knows that it's not bad isn't that interesting it's like an elephant organ but it's a fucking brain also she's smart she is she sounds as smart as an elephant. I mean, how do you know who's welcome and who's not? She's smart. Although then if the vagina was that smart, it should know that when someone's in danger and the sperm is

coming to not let that sperm in. If it were really smart, it would fend off like rapists and, you know, all the bad guys' sperm. Wouldn't that be just a dreamy scenario? I think there's some Republican senators who do think that that happens, which is a problem. Yeah. Well, the vagina is only going to get smarter as we move on, guys. It's evolution. People are getting smarter, not dumber. Although some people are really stupid. Yeah. Okay. We're going to take a break on that note and get rid of all the stupid people and we'll be right back. Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches, there's a lot of suspense. Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pesto survive the first bite? Will the lunchbox come home

empty half full or come home at all and will you finish episode eight before you're done slicing the cucumbers get bell pure fiber internet with crave netflix and disney plus from 94 a month price guaranteed for two years on internet with a two-year term and auto pay credit visit bell.ca for details and to check availability bell connection is everything when i was 14 years old i was kidnapped and held captive for nine months i survived and i've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them i'm elizabeth smart and these are the survivor files i just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up don't say anything every week i'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable i knew if he woke up

without a doubt he was going to hurt me i started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level

of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo, and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm gonna have to look up this story. I'm obsessed, As Stone says, from bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table. It's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse. Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman.

I can wait four hours for the next bus or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first. I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people and they were like, you smiled at us. Not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it.

It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip, I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport. And Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook on the Big Money Players Network.

Our show is extremely accessible to first-time listeners. Each week, we talk to someone in show business, a.k.a. the biz, and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. Everyone has a good time, and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show. We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman, not that great. actually can you help me can you help me shape this yeah how about we flip it on his head okay how about we flip the script okay what if the surprise woman who actually you think is the

straight man is actually the one who's acting weird adam scott this entire time you've been expecting adam sandler to come to visit the show i i would never let go of that i have i would never set expectations for something like that to happen. It seems like you did. If the universe allows for something like that to happen, I'm open to it. I'm always going to accept. You know, Danny McBride, fine. Yeah.

It's all this fragile masculinity exuding. I could smell it walking down the hallway, to be honest with you. I was like, is that weed? Nope. It's fragile masculinity. Ben Stiller, no. Because a lot of times, out of context, people don't get it or even

know what a circle is. You know what I mean? Like, they're like, oh, what's the state? Everyone's so dumb except for you. And fake. Right, fake and also not interested or just like, oh, I've got my life. I don't care about your life. And a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us. Oh, and by the way, Will Ferrell told us personally he loves the show

and he wants to be a guest on every episode, but he's just so busy. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. and we're back with less stupid people and with low bosworth okay we are we're gonna take some questions and some callers low are you ready for some action i'm ready okay i'm ready yes i'm excited well our first question uh this one's just an email so she won't be joining us but this question comes from annie annie says dear chelsea i've been a fan and listener from the start i'm a psychologist who primarily administers intellectual and personality assessments

A few years ago, I was unfortunately in an abusive relationship and experienced a traumatic brain injury, also known as a TBI. As a result of that injury, I have a diagnosis of aphasia. In my case, it's a wall between my formerly large vocabulary, similar to yours, and my ability to access it as necessary during quick communication. My question is, can you give me some of the tips you discuss on the podcast that you use to continually increase your vocabulary? Also, any advice on how to manage the anxiety that comes at work and increases the severity of my ability to access my vocabulary? Forever, one of your biggest fans and supporters, Annie. First of all, I want to say one thing.

Accessing your vocabulary and having aphasia, you have to understand that it's okay not to have to use sophisticated words all the time. It's okay to communicate. Your main goal is to relay something, a thought or a message or whatever. So just do that in the simplest way without putting pressure on yourself to remember the bigger words to do that. That's not necessary right now. In the meantime, what you can do and what I always do is I always have vocab words. I have word of the day, dictionary, you know, things. I get a million words of the day. I always print them out, have them laminated. I collect them. Like if I, there's 20 new words, I print them out and put them in a laminated sheet and put them in my closet or put them on your fridge so that you're seeing them every single day. And I guarantee you, you will start

to imprint new words into your vocabulary. And then you're going to have a whole new slew of words. And some of those words that you already know will be repeated, but you're cementing them in your brain in a visual way. And that lends itself to memorizing things more easily, even if you are dealing with aphasia. Yeah. And Lo, I know you had a traumatic brain injury a few years ago. Yeah, I was like, is this question custom tailored for me? Yes. Well, we do do that. I know. Chelsea, you're like an English teacher, like posting up your words. I know. I love it. It's all I've got. I had a traumatic brain injury in 2019. I was at a restaurant in Manhattan and one of the swinging kitchen doors came off its hinge and fell onto my head. And it was pretty

brutal and I dealt with some loss of vocabulary for a period of time. I think that I have mostly recovered, but sometimes it still happens to me where I can't come up with the word and it's really, really tough. What I would say is that brain exercises really helped me, whether it's brain games. It could be as simple as dedicating yourself to 20 minutes of reading a book every single night just to kind of activate your brain again to like be reading and understanding just language in general but i would give yourself just as much physical rest as you can in the time that you can right really focus on sleep we know that as women we need more sleep than men and one of the things that my doctors recommended for me while i was going through my tbi recovery was to

really avoid inflam foods because inflammatory foods can cause even more brain fog. And I think it can probably make the aphasia that she's talking about even worse. I notice for myself, when I eat a bunch of gluten, I really struggle with my vocabulary. I really struggle to find the words that I'm looking for. And when I eat a cleaner diet, that doesn't seem to be as big of a deal for me. I'm also going to go down the peptides injectables rabbit hole right now into something called BP7157. I take that. BPC157. BPC. BPC. Thank you. BPC157, right? Yeah. And this has actually started to be recommended for people who have brain issues. It is a gastric acid, I think, that supposedly can help with like brain lesions and things like that. So I would

look into that. It's supposed to be like a crazy like healer type of peptide. It is on, I think, the list of worldwide banned substances for doping. So I hope that you're not a professional athlete. You can't be a professional athlete and take it, but the general population can take it and um it may help and yeah it may help and it also that also helps with like uh physical recovery and any injuries like i inject it into my knee area all the time especially when i'm skiing because it helps like kind of heal whatever your issues are the other thing i wanted to say what lo just touched upon though is that your diet and the correlation between what you put in your body and your mental alacrity is scientifically proven so like i know if i'm about to do some event like

if I'm going to do this podcast, I don't eat before I do that because my mind isn't as sharp. Your mind will always be sharp when you're a slightly hungry. It'll be sharper, you know, when you're full and you feel tired and you're not digesting things. Well, that's when you start to get lazy and you feel less kind of vibrant. So just be mindful of that. And you know, when you eat, don't overeat because that puts you into like, then you spike your blood sugar and then you go high and then you crash. So you have to be really mindful of your diet, especially when you're talking about these kinds of issues it's like we're dr phil and and i think we gave some great i think so too i feel like we have like a doctor this is like two doctors we're like two

really medically advanced laymen yes yeah exactly yes um bbc 157 okay so our next question comes from cynthia and she will be joining us on the phone here in a moment she says dear chelsea i'm a 39 year old woman living in brooklyn new york with my beautiful girlfriend of four years now my fiance. I have a great job. I love my fiance to pieces. I'm not the most social person and I don't have many friends, if any at all. I consider myself an intelligent person and I've been in therapy for many years on and off to help me cope with childhood trauma. I think the root of my depression or maybe the consequence of it is I have zero motivation. I don't have the willpower to exercise. I have a pretty shitty diet and I basically just work to come home to do the same

cycle the next day. I know that diet and exercise is a huge factor for bettering myself mentally and physically, but I just can't seem to find the energy or motivation to get up and do all the things I probably should to make myself feel better. I used to be on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds, but stopped them on my doctor's advice because it withered my sex drive down to nothing. I've been off my meds for a couple months now, and I've been feeling the ups and downs of that. I'm consumed with shame and guilt at the fact that I know exactly what I have to do, but the fuck it in my brain is much stronger than any of those thoughts. I've talked to a doctor, and they tell me I just need to push myself.

But how? I've had times in my life where I did have motivation, like in my 20s, and I'd get up and exercise and eat a healthier diet, but I feel like that part of me is just not alive anymore. My fiancé also struggles with the same lack of motivation I do, so it seems like we enable each other. How can I spark some much-needed motivation? I'm tired of being tired.

Cynthia. Hi, Cynthia. Hey, Chelsea. Hi, Catherine. Hi, this is our special guest, Lo Bosworth. She's here today. Hi, Cynthia. Who's going to go first? Because I have an idea. I think you should go first.

Okay. Cynthia, have you ever tried meditation because it requires no physical exercise and no dieting? I haven't, no. So meditation is really cool because it creates new neural pathways in the brain. and creating new neural pathways in the brain allows you to create new habits, new hobbies, new interests, because I think what you may be experiencing is something that a lot of us are experiencing right now, which is kind of this like freeze mode in reaction to potentially the stress of the times we're living in or whatever it may be, right? I think that there's

not a ton of hope right now. And so I think one of the ways to think about from an actual like neurochemical neuroplasticity point of view is how can I create neural pathways to change how my brain is behaving? And then I can change how my body is behaving, right? My behavior can follow. And so I've been doing something called transcendental meditation off and on for almost 10 years and it's a tool in my toolbox that I use when I'm feeling really anxious or really depressed and after like five or six days of doing transcendental meditation I wake up and I actually feel different and I'm actually inspired to like go do things differently in my day so that would be my like immediate go-to suggestion I think outside of just acknowledging that we live

some really weird times and i think what you are describing is to a certain degree the human condition and we all feel this way from time to time okay okay that is good advice and i i always endorse i espouse meditation but you and your partner are in a like a funk together so out of love like if you can't do it for yourself then you need to be doing it for her you guys have to get on a different fucking program and you have to write down what your goals are. I want you guys to sit down together tonight and write down what you want to be accomplishing in a month, exercise wise and diet wise and meditation wise. So now you have like three tasks that you have to be mindful of every single day and you need to be accountable to each other. And when she's weak, you need to be

a little bit stronger. And when she, and when you're weak, she's going to have to pick it up too because you guys are kind of commiserating together and until you break this pattern you're not gonna you're gonna be stuck in this pattern and you want to be healthy and strong yes when you don't do anything for long periods of time you become less inclined to want to do those things but the minute you say today we're gonna go for a 15 minute walk together 15 minutes you can do that together yeah and you're gonna feel the benefit of that when you get back you might be annoyed and like but you're just going to do that every day for one week from now 15 minutes of exercise together the two of you have to do together if you can can you yeah i think we can

yeah that's nothing okay and then you can download a meditation app any of them you can i do chopra which is called presence they just change the name of it but start with an app because those are easier there's happy 10 happier there's headspace headspace is really user beginner friendly download headspace yeah do that headspace is a good and you guys can meditate together that's an even more powerful vibration to create it's two people meditating together two people that love each other like you're you're doing this together this is a team now you're on a team with your partner and you're gonna put 15 minutes a day towards exercise you're gonna do five minutes a day to begin with of meditation and you're gonna be mindful of what

you eat. Doesn't mean you have to change your entire life, but just start to make little healthier choices. One thing that's really helped me is the addition of healthy choices, especially when you're just starting out. It's like adding in a little fresh fruit, adding in a fresh salad, like something that's really manageable and easy. And like you start to crave that stuff even more. Yes, absolutely. Instead of French fries, get a salad instead of whatever, just those things. it doesn't sound appealing i understand but once you start to practice these things you're going to create all of those neural pathways that she's talking about and you're going to start to crave the goodness and the like you're going to start to crave to move your body for 15 minutes

you just have to commit on the lowest level and then also i think what you should do is write down at the end of the day how you felt about all of the stuff you did how did i feel about the exercise How did you feel after you exercise? Good, bad, exhausted, whatever. How did you feel after you made a healthier choice with your food? Good, bad, great, didn't matter, had no impact. Write that down for a week, and I promise you, you will start to see benefits, and you're going to start to feel differently.

Your lack of motivation is feeding itself. Right. So now you have to feed it something else. I have a question for you, too. Is there room for a dog in your life? you know right now no we have a small apartment my super you know i'm sorry my landlord wouldn't be cool with it but uh we are planning to move eventually and definitely want to get a dog yeah i think that is such a helpful tool in getting you to the move more because you're

just like i'm out with my dog i'm listening to a podcast maybe i'm having a good time i want to go an extra block like it just helps so much getting you out and about Yeah. And being outdoors at all, whether it's nice, ugly, cold gray is good for your system. That's good for your immunity system. It's good for your energy. Like you have to feed yourself medicine because you're depriving yourself of all of the things that life has to offer. Everything's here for you and you're choosing to not, you know what I mean? You got to like step it up a little bit. And on the medication front also, is your sex drive better without the medication? It hasn't. I mean, it's only been about three months and I'm just like waiting around to see what's going to happen. And I'm still kind of at a lull.

Okay. So then maybe you do need the medication. Like was the medication making you not sexual too? Yeah, I think that it contributed to me not having any kind of sex drive. And my doctors agreed that that does usually happen on anti-anxiety meds or antidepressants of certain kinds. Okay.

So I think what you should do is do this, this prescription that i've given you for the next four weeks okay do that and see if your mood changes and if that at that point it doesn't i want you to call us back okay but you guys have to do this every day together you have to commit to it yeah and i love what you say about like starting small i think like it's not new advice but it is the best advice like because you do get the ball rolling when you start yeah you just got to pick up like you made this call you're you're calling in because you want to change your life yeah and now you have the opportunity to change your life. I just told you the simplest things to do. They're totally accomplishable, regardless of

what happens in our atmosphere, what's happening right now, that has no impact. You know what I mean? Just, I want you to move forward, caring about your body and caring about your partner's body. Lo, I wanted to ask too, are there any supplements that you would recommend as far as sexual wellness and increasing libido or anything like that? Especially for women? I think, honestly, I think a great multivitamin is just a good place to start. We make a great one at Love Wellness, not to toot our own horn. Yeah, toot your own horn, bitch. What do you think you're eating?

Toot your own horn. Go to lovewellness.com and pick up a multivitamin. That's always good. Everyone needs fucking vitamins. There are some libido supplements out there that you can try. But I think just in general, there are some classic herbs that support women's health that are actually found in our multivitamin as kind of herbal add-ons like ashwagandha, chast tree, St. John's wort, et cetera. But a good multivitamin can really help with hormone

balance. It can help with some of the neurological stuff that you're talking about. 90% of Americans have vitamin deficiencies. Most of them are vitamin B and vitamin D, and that can actually lead to a lot of depression and anxiety. I dealt with that myself. So I think, you know, in addition, probably just a routine trip to the doctor you know could be in order just to take like a deeper look under the hood I'm not sure of your age and I won't ask but you know there's even the possibility that you could be experiencing some perimenopause symptoms which you know like may be a factor here I don't know but perimenopause can start in women at age 35 which is something that is like really not talked about and so yeah I think the team here has some really good

suggestions and I think I heard you live in Brooklyn you probably are doing good things for yourself already and you're just like not noticing it like you're a New Yorker I live in New York too like we walk a lot everywhere every single day you know what I mean so that that first week that you're taking a journal like write down all the things that you're doing like yes like go above and beyond and take that 15 minute walk but I suspect that like you're already doing some things every day that you can feel proud about and you are stuck in kind of this like negative self-talk environment. And yeah, I think remembering that you want to do it for your partner and that you love them and that you need to be accountable to them and for them is a really helpful part of it

also. You know, it's like whenever my boyfriend is having a bad day, like that's when I'm really able to jump into superhero mode. It's like, oh, you need me? I can do that for you. And so playing that role for each other, I think, can be really powerful. Gotcha. And it's going to put a pep in your step. I promise you, all of these little micro things are going to add up together and the sum of its parts are going to add to your life. Okay. I hope we haven't overwhelmed you. You can do it. No, no, it's not overwhelming at all. Check in with us again. Yeah, check in with us and maybe we'll have you up on a couples counseling episode with your partner yeah yeah that's fun we could do a follow-up with your partner and see how you guys are after a month

that would be amazing yeah and then we can take it even farther great okay cool all right thank you cynthia we'll talk to you soon okay so much thank you bye bye bye all right our next question comes from aspen aspen colorado aspen north carolina oh she lives in north carolina but her name is Aspen. Aspen. Maybe that's where she was conceived. Who knows? Dear Chelsea, I turned 30 this year and I've been at my job for 10 years. I'm a hairdresser at an amazing salon who supports me in every way possible. The issue I'm facing is I had five and 10 year goals and I've mostly hit all of them, even having a whoopsie doodle baby along the way. I can't help but feel that now I'm where I want to be. I'm really restless. I'm very driven. I'm a dream chaser,

but I feel like I've fallen into a very uncharacteristic slump. I absolutely adore my job and I do dream of bigger and better things, but I have such a hard time figuring out what the hell that means. Basically what I'm asking is, have you ever been in a career plateau and how did you get the clarity for your next big dream? Thank you, Aspen. Aspen. Hi, Aspen.

You look incredible. Thank you. I thought today was a great day to wear a pink power suit. You're correct. Excellent. Excellent. I love your outfit. You look great.

This is our special guest, Lo Bosworth. Hi. I've been a fan for a long time, too. This is wild. Oh, thanks. That's so nice. It's nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too.

Lo, did you want to go first since you're such a power top? Yeah. Honestly, I think sometimes it's okay to be in a slump. Here's how I think about it. I think that you could go too hard on being so good at stuff and too hard at, like, doing nothing and being lazy. I think that when I talk about balance, that's what I mean. Like I'm working on fertility stuff for myself right now.

I'm taking so many fucking supplements every night and doing all this stuff. And I decided the other night, like I had it. I needed to go out and have a drink. And I realize we're talking about your career and not like your wellness, your personal life. But I'm just trying to create that parallel, right? Is that like you can take a break from being a boss bitch if you want to. There is a lot of good in taking a break, in letting it coast, in letting it ride for a little while. You can accomplish a lot of personal goals, right?

You can get a lot of sleep. You can drink that cocktail that you're drinking, right? And so I didn't expect this to be the advice that tumbled out of my mouth, especially on this podcast. We were like, girls, yeah. Entrepreneurs, yeah. But like, my God, it's exhausting to always try to be the best and to always try to do the right thing. And so maybe you take this moment as a time for rest and self-reflection. And when your body and mind are ready, it will come to you. Perhaps your body and mind are not ready.

Yeah. I mean, that definitely all resonates for sure. It's exhausting always feeling like you have to be the best. I mean, I feel like it's helpful in a lot of ways and it's helped me get as far as I have like having such a high standard but at the same time it like it's hard to keep that going you know it's hard to keep that going and also when you're really good at multiple things in life there is such truth to what Loja said like sometimes you have to chill out to let the mood strike you like when you're in search of the next job the next project like that aggressively sometimes you're kind of almost creating a blockade towards that goal you know because you're putting so much pressure on yourself like there is something to be said for enjoying the

moment that you're in because you're not struggling right now and you might be in a little bit of a plateau as you say but out of plateaus things rise up you know what I mean so enjoy this time because you may not have a quiet time like this moving forward and I wouldn't put so much pressure on, I have to come up with this next thing. What is the next thing? I'm too productive and too smart to not be this productive. That is kind of like, you know, almost a negative self-talk cycle as well. So I would say, enjoy the time that you're having. You're in control of your situation. Things seem to be under control, right? I'm definitely maybe too in control of my situation sometimes, honestly. Yeah. Well, tell us about that. I mean, expand.

Yeah. So I've always had like a very clear idea since I was really young of exactly what I wanted to do. I went to school for it. I did it. I became really successful at a really young age. I mean, I'm only 30 now and I've been at my salon for 10 years, which is kind of wild. And I've gotten to the top of the salon. And I think, yeah, like I said, I had all those goals and I'm, and I was so meticulous about every, every day, this number I hit every month, this number I hit every year, this number I hit every like just kind of obsessed with it and I've been so obsessed with it I think being in control of my own career and my own pathway that now that I've kind of gotten to that you know goal that I had the not having control of it anymore is I think a little bit terrifying

because I'm like wait now I don't have control of the future because I don't know what the fuck the future is and do you have anything that you're thinking about doing next I mean that's what I was thing too, is I absolutely love what I do. But I can't help to like, I do still feel like I had this like, like this feeling in my stomach of like, I'm not fulfilling my full potential. Like I feel like I might have more to offer the world than I'm currently offering, if that makes sense. And if that's true, that will come to you in a natural way. I think you sound very controlling. You know what I mean? Like you're, you're a control freak of your own life. I mean, who most people are so that's fine but I think this is actually a good lesson that you're calling in

to talk to us and we're telling you both to just we're both telling you just to chill out chill out and like allow ideas to come your way and I'm sure whatever it is will naturally organically appear in your life once you stop looking so hard for it it's like trying to find a boyfriend right yeah exactly I mean that's honestly like how I met my husband 10 years ago too I finally was like fuck it I'm done dating I'm just gonna work and then literally three days later he comes in the salon and is like hey marry me and i was like okay okay great it sounds like you have to learn how to sit in your discomfort a little bit it feels like you're really uncomfortable and you're really trying to get out of that uncomfortable i don't know what's next i'm not

in control zone if you're trying something uncomfortable yeah i mean what'd you say been there done that okay well just you got just something to shake shit up i just love that she's having a cocktail okay well this is good what's your takeaway from this call it was definitely really helpful for sure I mean I think I knew that deep down but it's almost like when you're a little bit of a control freak and like a go-getter you almost need permission from somebody else to do nothing for a minute because it's like you're you never give that permission to yourself so I feel like it's really nice to get permission from women that I really respect who I consider to be go-getters as well yeah also like be really proud of yourself for getting this far in your

life you're 30 years old you've accomplished all of the goals that you had set out which leads me to believe that you are going to accomplish the next set of goals you set out and there is no time frame on those things so be very proud of your competency and your ability to like follow through on all of these dreams that you've had like that is a huge accomplishment so like we yeah enjoy that go with that for a minute luxuriating your accomplishments like you've earned the right to sit back and take a break and you're only fucking 30 like this is awesome 30. That's so cool. You know, I feel like I grew up really fast as I had a kid at 21. So it makes you grow up really quickly. But so sometimes I think I feel that I'm older than I am.

But yeah, you're right. I am only 30. And I do have lots of time to figure it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you will. All right. Well, thank you so much for calling in Aspen. Bye Aspen. Yes. Thank you, Chelsea. For all the years. I've been a huge fan since I was, you know, like 15 years old watching Chelsea Lely on the couch with my mom at night. So this has been an honor to talk to you so thank you for being a huge role model to me oh thanks thank you all right thanks bye guys bye what a sweetie so funny because cynthia was upset at herself because she didn't have the motivation and you know aspen's upset at herself yeah we should combine those two one has too much motivation yeah she's like what's next i'm like

I'd take a nap. Exactly. A nap is so delicious. Come on. So let's take a quick break, and we'll be back with one kind of wild question that we have. Okay. We're going to take a break. Behind every night spent making the kids' lunches, there's a lot of suspense.

Will they finally eat the veggies? Will the pesto survive the first bite? Will the lunchbox come home empty, half full, or come home at all? And will you finish episode eight before you're done slicing the cucumbers? Get Bell Pure Fiber Internet with Crave, Netflix, and Disney Plus from $94 a month, price guaranteed for two years on Internet with a two-year term and auto-pay credit. Visit bell.ca for details and to check availability.

Bell. Connection is everything. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and held captive for nine months. I survived, and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart, and these are the Survivor Files. I just remember this low, taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up, without a doubt, he was going to hurt me.

I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed, and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. They're stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to The Survivor Files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club part group chat for thought daughters pop culture obsessives and anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse i'm eli rallo and every week

we're connecting the dots between books the internet and the conversations everyone can't stop having i'm gonna have to look up this story i'm obsessed i'm obsessed from best-selling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments nothing is off the table it's Like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse. Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hey, this is Hayes Davenport.

And Sean Clements. We host the podcast Hollywood Handbook on the Big Money Players Network. Our show is extremely accessible to first-time listeners. Each week, we talk to someone in show business, a.k.a. the biz, and try to help them with their careers and see what they have to offer us. Everyone has a good time, and no one gets mad at their publicist for letting them do our show. We've had a lot of great guests like Sarah Sherman. Not that great.

Actually, can you help me shape this? How about we flip it on its head? How about we flip this around? okay what is the surprise woman who actually you think is the straight man is actually the one who's acting weird adam scott this entire time you've been expecting adam sandler to come to visit the show i i would never let go of that i have i would never set expectations for something like that seems like if the universe allows for something like that to happen i'm open to it i'm always going to accept you know danny mcbride fine yeah it's all this fragile masculinity

exuding i could smell it walking down the hallway to be honest with you i was like is that weed nope it's fragile masculinity ben stiller no because a lot of times in out of context people don't get it or even know what a circle is you know what i mean like you're like oh what's this state everyone's so dumb except for you fake right fake and and And also not interested or just like, oh, I've got my life. I don't care about your life. And a lot of other big shots that wouldn't be where they are without us. Oh, and by the way, Will Ferrell told us personally he loves the show

and he wants to be a guest on every episode, but he's just so busy. Listen to Hollywood Handbook on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On the new podcast, Solita, we share the messy reality of traveling alone as a woman. I can wait four hours for the next bus, or this random dude is offering me a ride on his motorcycle. I chose option B. I'm Julie Pinheiro, and I travel by myself because it's a rare space where I can say yes without asking anyone else first.

I'm on a mission to reclaim the word solita, trading the pity for possibility. Every time I tried to be alone, I kept meeting people, and they were like, you smiled at us, not a lot of people smile around here. It's when you're alone that you're most receptive to the world as it is and not the lies you're sold about it. It can be a time where you push your limits, change your mind, or wake up to a new version of yourself. So whether you're a solo travel veteran or you're too nervous to book your first trip, I hope you listen to Solita on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. and we're back with lo bosworth we are back and our final question comes from savannah she is 29

she writes dear chelsea my boyfriend tried to fuck a stripper two weeks ago and i'm wondering what i should do i'm leaning toward the idea of forgiving him going to couples therapy and working through it but part of me can't help but think what if this is who he is are these his true colors, how can I trust a liar? Do people genuinely make mistakes or am I just a sucker? For context, I'm a 29-year-old girl and my boyfriend is 31. He's the absolute love of my life, the most thoughtful, caring, passionate person I've ever known. He truly has a heart of gold. This sounds ridiculous, I know, but it is true. When we first got together, all of his friends warned me not to break his heart. Who knew I would be the one getting screwed? Well,

me and at least one other person. We were close friends for two years before we became a couple and have been dating for a year and a half, and we live together. Here's my problem. It's not so much the stripper. It is the lying, the deception. I feel tricked, betrayed, bamboozled. You get it. He went out of town a three-hour drive away on a work trip and was going to be gone for one, maybe two nights. The second day is wrapping up, and he decides to stay another night. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up at 2 a.m., grabbed my phone. To my surprise, he never called or texted so I FaceTimed him and he was in an Uber acting pretty weird but it was late and I didn't want to get into it so I went to bed. When he got home the next day the vibes

were kind of weird so I asked him what he did that night and told him it was shitty. He was too tired to drive but went out and partied. The area he was in has a lot of strip clubs so I asked if he went to a strip club and he said no. I could tell he was lying so I reassured him that I wouldn't be mad. I just would like to know the truth. He insists he did not go to a strip club doubles down, triples down. So I tell myself I trust him. I have no reason not to, and a week goes by. Then, Chelsea, I have a horrible gut feeling all week. I can't sleep, and I keep thinking he cheated on me, which is not normal. So I did the thing you're not supposed to do, and I looked at his phone. I went to his deleted text messages. Oh, so he was smart enough to

delete it. And found that he texted a stripper that night that he was on his work trip. Hey, this is tony come to indigo hotel i got you i leave at 10 a.m i feel so heartbroken confused and deceived am i a fool for not walking away or am i throwing something amazing away for a stupid mistake savannah lo would you like to begin no see this is the thing she says like my boyfriend tried to fuck a stripper but like who's saying she didn't show up nobody's saying she didn't show up he might have done it your boyfriend lied to you repeatedly he chose to stay in a hotel motel around a bunch of strip clubs instead of coming home to you that is all the information that you need to know that's it no other information is relevant that's what he chose to

do he's telling you exactly who he is and that's it he's a liar yeah bye i mean like he spent a lot of time to like plan prepare execute this was not off the cuff right which means that if you he's done this before yeah like it it does take a lot of bravery I think to like go out and to actively cheat on somebody who you love in a lot of ways like it takes a lot of balls to actually execute against that plan it's the lying after the fact yeah if there was nothing to hide he would have just told you yeah i did i tried to fuck a stripper i've never done that before it's the lying so it's over like that's not somebody you can trust and that's not somebody who has your best interest so that's the that's the news and i hope that you act on that instead

of finding out about this happening in another six months right you know there is a question of like is your tolerance level to let him go do these things and like have that kind of relationship and if it is, fine, but, like, you can't really get past the lying. Like, there is no tolerance level for lying in a relationship. No, I really, the lying is, I can't deal with any adults who lie. It's too stupid. Adults that lie are never going to learn how to unlie. You know what I mean?

Like, if you're an adult that lies, that's just your pattern of behavior. It's who you are, and, like, you're not going to change. So, yeah. So, Savannah, I think it's over. Anyway, Savannah, sorry about that, but there's plenty of guys out there that won't lie to you. That's right. Okay. Well, hello, Bellsworth. How fun was today?

Thanks for having me. This was a delight. I want everyone to know where you can get her products. They are available nationwide at Target, Ulta Beauty, Walmart, Amazon, and then at lovewellness.com. Yes. And you also wrote a book called Love Yourself Well. So that goes into all the science behind all of the gut, brain, vagina, axes, everything we're talking about. And you have a podcast, right? And you have a podcast called Gut Feelings.

yes our love on us podcast is coming back next year we're on a little hiatus right now because we got a lot of work to do but the podcast will be coming back okay great okay lo thank you so much congrats on everything bye if you'd like advice from chelsea shoot us an email at dear chelsea podcast at gmail.com and be sure to include your phone number dear chelsea is edited and engineered by brad dickert executive producer katherine law and be sure to check out our merch at chelseahandler.com. I survived nine months in captivity and I've spent my life exploring

how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are The Survivor Files. Every week, I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable, abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced.

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