Life with Nat - EP1: The beginning...

Episode Date: April 25, 2024

It's finally here!! Life with Nat - it’s me! Natalie Cassidy and I’ll be chatting away to family, friends and most importantly YOU. I want to pick people's brains on the subjects that I care about- whether that’s where all the odd socks go, weight and food or kids on phones. Each week I will be letting you into my life as i chat about my week, share my thoughts on the mundane happenings as well as the serious. I have grown up in the public eye and have never changed because of it. Life with Nat is the podcast for proper people. Come join the community. ♥️ Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx You can find us in all places here; https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/view INSTA: @natcass1 A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get groceries delivered across the GTA from Real Canadian Superstore with PC Express. Shop online for super prices and super savings. Try it today and get up to $75 in PC Optimum Points. Visit Superstore.ca to get started. We are recording. Ready? I just feel like it's weird. It's all very tense. What do we do now?

I'll tell you what it is. It's wanting to have done something for so long and then finally actually sitting here and now I can do it and I've got nothing to say so that's good tell us then what is this Natalie what's going on life with Nat is going to be a podcast that you can download every week which is a little bit of me for all the people that like me on Instagram and like my videos I tell tell it how it is. I'm very normal, very real. And I'm just going to chat to mates, some famous faces sometimes, the public, and we're just going to talk about everything and anything. Right, here we go. The pilot bloody episode

of Life With Nat. I've got a couple of guests here. Well, they're not really guests. I've got Emma, who's my producer, who's going to be editing it all together and helping me along the way. Say hello got Emma, who's my producer, who's going to be editing it all together and helping me along the way. Say hello, Em. Hello, Em. She thinks she's a comedian as well, so this will be fun. And my niece, Els Bells, has conveniently popped round today and I've just made her sit down and I said,

I'm doing the pilot, so could you just please say hello? Hello. Oh, there we go. That's me done. You'll be hearing a lot from Ellie and my niece. We're a lovely family, very close knit. So I want to invite all my family on if they can be bothered or if they want to, to have a little nag with me about different things. I'm also going to be, obviously this is the pilot and it's just mad, mad to have got to this point. What do you think of my room? It's lovely. Yeah. It's so sweet, mad to have got to this point. What do you think of my room? It's lovely. Yeah? It's so sweet, isn't it?

Well, considering what it was before, it had lime green wallpaper here. It was all echoey. I had a bed in here. No one ever slept in this room. Yeah, no, you've done well considering because it probably just would have stayed as it was like some of the other rooms will do for the next 10 years.

Oh, wow. True, though, isn't it? No, but that's because I haven't got the money to do them up. I mean, you have. You're just not really interested. That's true. You know, every house I've been in, my other house before this one, I did the whole way up, didn't I?

I did a few bits. But for some reason, I never do a bedroom up, do I? No, never. I've never ever done a bedroom up. That just shows you because I care about everybody else's bit and not mine. This is the only bedroom that's officially been done up and it's not a bedroom. I know, but it's not a bedroom, so it's irrelevant. But it's one of your bedrooms.

That's what's quite interesting. No, no, but it's because it's got a purpose. My bedroom probably will stay like that. You all right? Nice. No, it won't stay like that. I will get it done. It's just having the time to do it, isn't it?

But, yeah, I like it. Do you? I love it. Well, you helped me with the curtains, didn't you? I was going to say, yeah, it was sort of my idea, but, yeah, no, I love Do you? I love it. Well, you helped me with the curtains, didn't you? I was going to say, yeah, it was sort of my idea, but yeah,

no, I love it. No, it's excellent. Your sister helped me with the table. No, the furniture's lovely. It's really nice.

What's this though? Look. Did I tell you about this table here? No, you didn't. So this, it's like bamboo. It looks like bamboo.

It come out the box. It's on fucking Velcro. Yeah, that is liberty. It's on Velcro. It just sticks round. So imagine a cone, listeners. Like you've got a circle and I thought, oh.

A cylinder? A cylinder. That's what I'm thinking of. A cone? I'm not great at reading. A cone track. That's one of my favourite Alan Partridge episodes. When he's got the traffic cone.

No, you've lost me a bit there. Yeah, so it's got Velcro around. It sticks on and it's a wooden effect, but I thought it was all wood. Anyway, it's fine. Was it expensive? The table, it's about... I think it was a good...

It was a monkey. Wow. It was about a monkey. Yeah, no, I mean, to me, I could literally put my foot through that. A monkey's £500 for the people that aren't Cockney. The Cockneys out there. I'm not even...

I was born in St Bart's Hospital, St Bartholomew's, in the sound of bow bells, which is how I get round the fact that I'm Cockney. Yeah, that counts. Because I was born there, right? Yeah. I was actually Islington, so I grew up... Not, by the way, Islington.

Let's go to Upper Street for dinner. I'm from Islington so I grew up not by the way Islington let's go to upper street for dinner oh look I'm from Islington proper Islington yeah if you're from Islington you say Islington do you know what I mean yeah I don't really get the difference basically you were more rough than yeah I'm proper proper Islington not people that have moved in and gentrified it yeah okay it's one of those up and coming oh It's not up and coming now. I mean, you can't fucking buy a garage for less than half a million pound, but I love being out now. Yeah. I was going to say such a contrast for you, but you love being here in the, in the village. I love being in the village. Yeah. I love the local pub. I like the hall. It's like the Vicar of Dibley.

Everything that goes on is in the hall. We've got a Facebook so Elia lives up the road from me. There's a Facebook group which is hilarious. Oh it's so good. Honestly it fills me with joy. But what's the latest thing that's been on there? I should have a look really.

The most recent one that was hilarious and what's brilliant is when Mark thinks it's... Basically, what happens is... So Mark's my fiancé and hopefully you'll be hearing a lot more from him. So he'll put... Someone will post... So there was one once that was like,

I've got 30 cans of Heinz beans. Go in if anyone wants them. And then Mark will tag me in it. And then these people message me saying do you want the beans? No. Or there can be like, there was a Zimmer frame recently

and he just takes the piss and now all these people in my local village think I want all these fucking freebies and I don't. So yeah, Mark tags me. But I do like to get him back every now and again.

Oh, we've got a free abdominal cruncher here. I mean, do people use those? Do they still use those now? Oh, it's the bar that you had. Yeah, surely not. Yeah, but she don't anymore because she's getting rid of it. Who's going to want that? It's free.

Oh, someone wants it. It's gone. Oh, it's gone. It's gone. It weren't even up for a couple of minutes. I mean, it's good. Let's be honest. It's bloody brilliant

I've done it before you know toys things that kids girls have outgrown and they'll just say oh come and get whatever it's just the random bits

like I get it for a lot of things I do get it yeah but there is like the beans I mean that's kind how many did you

I mean I have to say can I just say my partner hates beans did you take them out he hates beans Jack to say, can I just say? My partner hates beans. Did you take them off? He hates beans. Jack can't stand beans. I'm not allowed to eat beans at home. So imagine me rocking up with 30 cans of beans.

He's got an aversion to beans. Kidney beans. If I make a chilli here for the family, it is nuts. I have to do a pot of just a normal chilli, kidney beans and chilli, so it's hot. Then I've got to do one that isn't hot with the kidney beans. And then I have to do a special one for Jack that's hot without kidney beans and chili so it's hot then i've got to do one that isn't hot with the kidney beans and then i have to do a special one for jack that's hot without kidney beans just sprinkle the beans in at the end it's pandemonium here absolute pandemonium when i cook but i do like to have everyone over i love having everyone over it's one of my favorite things it doesn't happen

enough because everyone's busy so anyway i can I can't believe I'm doing this, right? For everybody who is listening to this, I genuinely want to thank you. But I've had so many brilliant messages. And all I've done, really, I haven't even done loads about it at this point. I've sort of put it on my broadcast list on Instagram. And I've done a couple of photos of my room being done and whatever. And honestly, the messages from from people and they're so excited that I'm going to be chatting bollocks for an hour a week I don't know why but I think they like the fact that I'm a real person and people have seen me grow up on the telly they've seen me do lots of bits and pieces over the years

and I think that the general public, you know, a normal person actually likes the fact that I go on Instagram with no makeup on and just have a chat. Because I do think it's rare. I know people say that they are real and normal, but they're not. There's still people who say, I'm so normal. And actually, they've permanently got a face full of makeup. Their hair's always done.

I don't give a shit. It's not often you see a famous person sat in their car munching on a halloumi kebab. That's what I'm saying. Nice how they are, aren't they? They're so good. I haven't had one for ages. Yeah, I know.

You should get another one. I will get one soon. So this week, what I wanted to talk about with somebody out there was the fact that I have made this change to do this podcast. It has taken me, I reckon I've been thinking about doing it for two years-ish, and I've finally bitten the bullet. I've spent some money on my room. You know, it is a risk you're taking. You're putting yourself out there. There's loads and loads

and loads of podcasts. You know, everyone says it's oversaturated but I thought I want to do one and I love I just love everything about doing them you know I've been a guest on loads of them and I just really enjoy the experience so now I feel like it's my turn I asked everybody on Instagram is there something that you have done that you've made a big change that you want to talk to me about? Or is there something you would like to change? And we had some cracking responses. Obviously, I can't play everything. Here we go. Jen, Jen from West Wales.

I'm not going to do the accent. Hi, Nat, I can't do accents. The only one I can do is a little bit of... Oh, no, I can't do it. Oh, my God. Welsh. Oh, would you like Welch. Oh, would you like an omelette?

Oh, brain. That's all I can do. Here we go. Here's the first one. Hi Nat, I'm the same age as you and I recently took the plunge

and I'm off to university in September to study human biology and health. After starting an access course last September, I can honestly say it's the best thing

I've done for me in a long time. I've got six kids. Six fucking kids? Jen's a Catholic. I have six kids and they are all at the age now where they need me much less, ages 18 down to 10. I don't know, Jen.

I'd say that 10, 11, 12 and that, I think they need you quite a lot. Not that I'm making know, Jen. I'd say that 10, 11, 12 and that. I think they need you quite a lot. Not that I'm making you feel guilty. You go out there and you study, but 10 years old, do you know what I mean? I hope she's got a few beans on the table. So I figured while I'm still young enough, I would have a go at a career other than being a mum.

I love your broadcast channel and your Insta in general. You make me proper belly laugh. Thank you for keeping it real and being you. So thank you for that, Jen. And and yeah why shouldn't you do that i i've i didn't go to university i started work when i was 10 i was actually eight in the royal shakespeare company at the barbican beggars opera playing a nurturing something you don't know um but yeah i've been at work all the time obviously i did a a few GCSEs, didn't really. So I earned money. But when I look back, I have missed that. I've missed that education. And I

love learning now. I love books. I love art. I love poetry. And I think I will in the future, a hundred percent. I've done it before. OU, Open University. I've got the prospectuses through and I've had a look. I just haven't got the time at the moment but I would love to do some further learning so Jen it's a cracker should we call Bex?

let's phone so we're going to phone Bex Bex is going to tell us what she would like to change go on give her a bell my first caller is going to tell us what she would like to change. Go on, give her a bell. My first caller. Hello?

Hello, is that Bex? It is, yeah. Sorry, I'm driving at the minute. Let me just pull over. Hang on a minute. Are you sure you're all right to talk now? Because we can ring you back in 10 minutes or whenever. Can you do 10 minutes? Is that all right?

And then I'll be home. Yeah, don't rush about. Is 10 enough or do you want 15? 10's marvellous. All right, speak to you then cheers bye bye first change of the listeners is uh parking that's going to be the first change on your listeners gonna do is turning off the car so yeah loads of you have spoken about what you'd like to change what you wouldn't what i've realized is there's so many topics to talk about that i can't just ring up loads of people and talk about things for two minutes so i'm going to keep all your ideas collate them all together

and then what i'll do is specials on each topic. I think that's going to be a much better way forward. But bear with me, won't you? Because I am just starting this out. So there's no massive sort of shape to it. I don't know what I'm doing each week. I'm just going to do loads of different bits and see what works and see what you like, which is going to be part of it really. If you do want to message me at all, you can WhatsApp me and voice notes are really good because then we can play them on 07788 2019 19 i have to say him that number is banging thank you i'm very very pleased emma phoned me from um sainsbury's up the road like the argos going i'm just going for a load of sim cards like messaging me what what number do you like what number do you like but that one's a good one did you look like a drug dealer

like buying loads of SIM cards I properly did a pile of them in my hand just skimming through looking at them picking out the best numbers like in a little like sub pile and then you were

taking pictures sending them to me doing voice notes people must have thought you were a nutter and then I found some more again on my knees at the end of the aisle

like going I'm on my knees I'm on my knees looking through and like all these ones are even better and then you're reading them out and i went try saying it like that and oh yeah but it was the way you said it because i didn't say it oh i said oh double seven i mean we could do oh 77 88 20 19 19 yeah but it's catchy and it does stick in your head which is excellent yeah so, you can voice note me, message me. How boring are you?

Getting that excited over a number? I know, but I did. I was so excited. No, when we've done our number, we were excited. Oh, right. No, I know, but it's quite a lot. A lot of chat about one number. It'll be edited down.

No, it's all standing. Even you taking a piss. So then, I know i'm very organized it's because i'm a control freak and i thought oh you listen to other podcasts and the listeners have names so i want want a name for you all so i put on my broadcast list right i've got my life with now i'm doing this podcast what can i call lot? And a lot of you came back with names for the pod. So could you read my messages properly? That would help to start with.

No, I'm not being rude. But yeah, you did. You not read it properly. But then I've got loads. So I'm going to read some out. There's so many, right? Nat's Natterings. But again, it would be the natterers

so I personally don't at the beginning I liked natterers but I don't like it now the natter bells the natter hubs

they're from Caroline quite cute natties or nat nats auntie nat nat I am auntie nat nat that is my name life with nat and nat nats it's a lot yeah it's a lot of nats Natties or Nat Nats? Auntie Nat Nat. I am Auntie Nat Nat. That is my name.

Life with Nat and Nat Nats. Yeah, there's a lot of Nats. There's a lot of Nats. Nats Cats. That was from Michelle in Connecticut as well. Oh, no, that's amazing. From the US of A. I felt like proper... I was like, someone from America's messaged me.

I was buzzing about that. That's cute, I like that. The lifers have come up a lot, because it's life with Nat, but I don't think I can call a group of people that listen to me the lifers, because that is a term for people on death row, isn't it? Yeah, there was one, someone sent an audit letter.

It might be a bit awkward. From Lisa. Go on. Hi, Nat. This is Lisa from County Durham. I first of all thought we should be called the Midges because you're a Nat and we could be your Midges, but then I thought, oh, it's a bit gross.

You're not wrong. So then I thought, oh, we could be called the Lifers because it's life with Nat, and we'll be with you for life. Thanks, Nat. Bye. Aw. She's lovely, isn't she, Lisa?

She said she's from county durham but she doesn't she sounds like she's from bethnal green so i think she lives there now she's definitely not from way ahead definitely relocated way ahead no that's um newcastle yeah county durham my auntie and uncle live in county durham Is that like Darlington? Yeah, it's that way, yeah. Oh, George. Yeah, it's quite soft, isn't it? I think that might just be my auntie Eleanor that's soft. I like this, but it doesn't quite work. But I like the play on words from Gabby here.

Nat allies. So it's allies, but the natalize. It doesn't quite work, but I get what she was trying to do. No, I like it, but... The natalize. Nat's allies. It doesn't quite work, but I get what she was trying to do. No, I like it, but... The Natalize. Nat's allies. Yeah. I'm not sure. So we've got Natterers, Chatterers, Chit Chatterers,

the Jibber Jabbers. I like the Jibber Jabbers. The Babblers. I like the Babblers. The Babblers. The Babblers. It's a bit of a mouthful though, isn't it? The Babblers. It sounds Babblers It's a bit of a mouthful though isn't it The Babblers Sounds like you could call them Babs

The Babs Yeah we can't say alright Bab I'm not from Birmingham am I That's Lycett Bab Birds Chit chatting I don't know why you'd have the birds

It's because of the chitting and the chatting And then she said the birds. It's because of the chitting and the chatting. And then she said the birds, but I think birds is, you know, I might have some wonderful gentleman wanting to talk to me. No, there was a really good one. The Chatterleys. Oh, I like the Chatterleys. So do I.

Do you like that one? Yeah. Of course you do. But that's one of my faves, the Chatterleys. Oh, that was an audio. Should I play that one in? Yeah. I was thinking maybe the chattelies not the natalie's the chattelies why are all my listeners very quiet because i haven't

listened to you yet um nat's knits i can't call people the knits You knits Fuck me Cassidy's Sundance Kids She was cute Cathy She was from Ireland Nat's Lovely Lot I do say lovely lot a lot But no The Nataliciouses

What? I've got a lisp The Casseroles I quite like the Casseroles I do like the Casseroles Because I love doing a casserole but it's not good for the height of summer is it when you've got your sunglasses on and you're sweating

and it's 90 degrees and you're going listen to it the casseroles yeah nice the pits it's not good the natets the cassettes the cassettes is good the cassettes

nanatics the natets The cassettes is good The cassettes Nanatics Nanatets And the one that I like You've not put in here Which is cute Oh no Which one? The one I really really like

Is the Nutcrackers Cute I like the Nutcrackers Because Well I'm cracking Or crackers Or crackers But I like the Nutcrackers because, well, I'm cracking. Or crackers.

Or crackers. But I like the Nutcrackers. Son of a Nutcracker! Jesus. But you love Christmas. That's what I mean. Your massive Nutcrackers that you have. That's what I mean.

But is it too seasonal? Maybe I could swap it for the festive period because you do realise what's going to happen, don't you, when the festive period comes. No, you've got no idea. You've got no idea. I'm going to go round the shops. We're going to decorate my tree together. You've got to get involved.

It's going to be excellent. We've got quite some time yet. Let's get to spring first. No, I know. We haven't even hit the first season yet of the year. Straight through to Christmas. Forget it. Forget it.

It won't be long. It won't be long. The trumpets, the trumpeteers. I'm not doing anything remotely about EastEnders. This is not a podcast for Sonia. It's for Natalie. And that'll be the end of that.

I like the Chatterleys. I like the Chatterleys and I like the Natcrackers. Chatterleys. Because you don Chatterleys and I like the Natcrackers. Chatterleys. Because you don't really say Natalie. You say Nat on here. The Chatterleys. The Chatterleys. I like the cassettes as well.

Yeah, the cassettes. I like the cassettes. Oh, hang on a minute. You better give me 15. I'm stuck behind the slowest tractor of all time. I'll be home in 10 minutes. Thanks, guys. Sorry.

So sorry. Will be. No No I'm joking Well we can call Cheryl We were supposed to call Cheryl Now Bex is late I'm not going to let it impact On the next person Because it's not fair

One thing you will find out About me Is I don't like Being late No but you can understand The tractor situation Where we live If you get stuck

Behind the tractor here Going that way You're talking 20 minutes to get to where? Done. No, it's true. Forget it. Can I also say

why you haven't mentioned at all that I'm sat here in rollers? Oh, you're sat here in rollers? No, but you haven't said why have you got rollers in?

Do you think I just wear my hair like this? I presume you've got some important reason to have your hair in rollers. I don't want to... Ask me why I've got my hair in rollers.

Why have you got your hair in rollers. I don't want to... Ask me why I've got my hair in rollers. Why have you got your hair in rollers? Because I did all the photography. So all of the pictures for the artwork, if you like, for the pod. So when you search for it, my little cassettes, when you search for it, my little knack crackers,

like the picture that will be on wherever, you know, Apple, Spotify. You forgot your little chattelies. My little chattelies. But yeah, I've done Apple, Spotify. You forgot your little Chatterleys. My little Chatterleys. But yeah, I've done all the artworks. They were really good. I did a few different ones, different outfits. Kieran's lovely, photographer I know,

but he said he'll have them all over to me by Sunday night. He'll send them on Dropbox and I can send them over to you. But also, guess what I'm doing later? Taking care of our rollers? What are you doing later, Nat? I am going to the o2 to watch ray she's great she's so good i'm so excited and i think she is now going to be one of them people that's going to be impossible to yeah to go and see i'd never heard of her until i heard she won

like seven breaks still didn't know it's a song seven six sorry never never heard a song did you see her um did you see her on jonathan ross no she was so good it's worth just watching her perform she's got that she's got something very special she's got that she's the 2024 amy winehouse she's bringing back the one should we call shell all right sorry i feel like you're being late no it's true some professional hello hello shell hi oh my little podcast virgin i know not for much longer and now you're on one i know you've not even listened to one yet and now you're on one i haven't i've just had to ask my husband how do you even listen to a podcast? You've got a little purple app.

I looked at it, but I didn't listen to any yet because I'm saving myself for yours. No, I was going to say, don't listen to any others. No, I'm not. Just subscribe to mine and you can just have a library of me. Yes. And then you've got to tell all your friends who don't listen to podcasts to do the same. And hopefully this is what we'll do around the country. We'll have waves of just people who listen to me get them all on board although my

friend my best friend said podcasts are the way forward she she obviously listens to them they are the way forward i mean a lot of people say that um it's it's old hat and that you shouldn't really do a new podcast because it's all sort of done and dusted but from the messages i've got on people like yourself, they're obviously not. There's a huge market for people that aren't into them yet. Well, it's individual, isn't it? To whoever's doing the podcast,

everyone's different and got something different to talk about. They have, but just listen to mine, yeah? Yes. Where about are you? Where are you, Shell, in the country? Where are you? Northampton. Oh, how far is Northampton from here?

An hour and a half. Is that all? It's not that far. Is that near? Forgive me, I'm not very good at geography. I'm awful. No, I'm not. Where are you near that I might have heard of also?

Milton Keynes. Milton Keynes? Oh, bloody hell. Yeah, that's not far at all from me. No, no, no. About, oh, probably about 20, 30 minutes from Milton Keynes. That's where I go to my Ikea oh very good very good and have you got children you said you've got a hubby yes I've got um two boys they are nine and the youngest will be six next week oh that's hard work they hard work yes they are but they're brilliant they're They're hard work. They just talk a lot.

My Joan is eight in August and she opens her eyes. And from the minute she opens her eyes, she doesn't stop talking. But when I genuinely mean that, that she is continuously talking. So I do understand. See, I thought it was girls that talk a lot, but no, boys do as well. And my eldest, when he comes out of school, it's like verbal diarrhea at me. Because he hasn't spoke to me all day, he just, well, actually, we're walking home and they're both in one ear on each side talking at me together. Oh, yeah, but do you know what, Shell? That is a lovely thing because a lot of the time that, you know, you see kids, they come out of school, you go out, you can see how was your day. And they don't say a word., you know, you see kids, they come out of school, you go out, you can see, how was your day? And they don't say a word.

Do you know what? I said it to my friend the other day, and she said, how lovely, grateful, especially the older one. He's excited to talk to me. It's lovely. Oh, no, that is so lovely. Oh, that's really good. Oh, well, I can't thank you enough for your message.

I'm so pleased, in all seriousness. Oh, I was just chuffed that you got it and read it and um yeah because i meant i love your videos they're just just down to earth and real isn't it well that's all i want to be so i want this podcast to be the same i just want to chat to people and i think it's nice for people to have a chance to have a chat with me as well because they like my videos and stuff yeah it's lovely it's brilliant made my day oh thank you shell and um well i'm going to keep your number we'll keep in contact with the dms anyway let me know what you think of the first one and then if anything pops up that's relevant and you think oh i can pipe up about that and have

a little chat we can have a chat about the kids again and see how you're getting on yeah brilliant thank you thanks so much shell have a good day. Take care. Bye, love. You too, bye. That was cool. She was nice, wasn't she? She was cute, though. She was lovely, wasn't she? I don't know if I could have two boys, six and nine. I mean, I know I've got girls, but I do...

Boys are much better than girls. No. The teenage years are hard. Eliza will be 14 in September. And it's hard. Yeah, I don't know how you do that. I know, Eliza will be 14 in September and it's hard. Yeah, I don't know how you do that. I mean,

it's wonderful. I have pockets of joy and wonderfulness. But pockets? Yeah. Very small. Very tiny, shallow pockets.

That tiny, tiny, tiny pocket on the jeans that you're not sure what goes in. No, like Polly Pockets pocket. Yeah,

the jeans where you have your big pocket and then that little tiny square. The random little one. That's for the key, isn't it? Is it, though? Because who's just carrying around one key like that?

But I think that's what it was made for in the past. Oh, really? But yeah, that sort of pocket. You can fit in a, like, trolley token and that's about it. Which I need in the car. Every time I go to Sainsbury's

I haven't got a thing or marksies. You've got a little clippy one that goes on your keys. Yeah, but then you've got to leave your keys in there. No, no, you clip sort. Oh, you want to clip it off. Yeah. Well, you have to clip it off the key ring.

Yeah, but I had a bonus the other day. I took one out of my car, went over and I was like, fuck's sake, it's a Euro, fuming. Did it work? Fucking worked, didn't it? I was well chuffed. I felt like I'd won the lottery, even though it was my euro. Oh, I see.

Nice. For the sake of the pod, Emma is now showing me her very boring tote. Where did you get that? Do you know what? At least you've got one all the time. Also, there's quite a lot going on on that bunch. There's a bunch of random stuff. Have you got a torch on there?

No, it's a whistle. Oh, that's good. Because I've read about it being for safety and security. They said get a whistle. I don't know. I haven't used it yet but it's on there Sorry, give it to me Do you want the whistle? You can't I am wandering through a field

I'm in a field It's pitch black And I see two men behind me In balaclavas Running, it's two o'clock in the morning. It's pitch black. Why are you in this field? And I'm going to do this.

Yeah. What's going to happen? Oh, they'll go, ow. And then they'll go, why are you in a field at two in the morning? We know we're in a field. We're dodgy people doing dodgy things. I was in a field at two in the morning looking for your dog. I haven't got a dog. Okay. But you're also not in a field. Looking in the morning. Looking for your dog. I haven't got a dog.

Okay, but you're also not in a field. Looking for someone else's dog then. I was looking for my friend's dog. Yeah, but the whistle will help for a dog as well. They'd like... Please don't hurt me. Save me. Do you know what?

That's pathetic. We need to get Emma a proper alarm. You need a rape alarm. proper alarm you need a rape alarm I don't want a rape alarm why there's too much going on here already I'm going to press it

all the time well anyway those keys are interesting it's just keys I mean you ain't putting them keys in that little pocket

are you do us a favour though send me pictures of your keys and if your keys are very large Send me pictures Of your keys And if your keys are very large And what's on your keys Have you got any interesting bunches of keys Does it be Emma's keys

Because that's impressive I will put a picture on the whatsapp Of your keys Is that alright Yeah I think so We can sort of hide the keys a little bit It's more about the rope Yeah, okay. Is that all right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think so. No one can figure it out from... Nah.

No one can... We can sort of hide the keys a little bit. It's more about the rope and the whistle and... The rope and the whistle and the... That thing. Are you a brownie? I used to be. Yeah.

There's also my mess on there. There you go. Yeah, okay. Ooh. Yeah. It's good. Keys, innit? Keys and keys and stuff. I don't know. It it just builds up you just forget what's on there yeah no i mean i'm talking i'll show you mine i'll

send a picture of mine on there as well yeah mine's pretty yeah it's pretty good you need to call let's go back oh yeah hello hello there have you got home i'm so sorry about that i mean typically there's always a tractor isn't there always we know what it's like we live in the country yeah always a tractor or a flood especially when you've got something to do although you could have got home 10 minutes earlier just to be prepared I'm a bit upset well I know I do know that my friend did just inform me of that that I should have been at home waiting but it's fine I'll let you off yeah it's not like me I must admit I just wanted to say firstly thank you for following me on Instagram and thank you for responding to me you're welcome have you followed me for a long time? I have. And I'm also a massive

chatterbiscuit. So obviously, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch. Yes, I followed you before that. But then obviously you being on there is like, she's even better now. Oh, thank you. I do love doing it. So you voice noted me tell me again. Yeah. So on my voice note, I said about the inability to to try and eat healthy every day, and it always goes to shit but it's really more about the obsession I wish that I wasn't obsessed with food so I wish that I what is it ate to live rather than live to eat and also about this obsession we have with what we look like and therefore the obsession with food that follows that agreed what I would say regarding this

conversation is I think it's such a big topic for me that we'll have a little chat about it now yeah and then I think I've got to do a whole hour on it because I've got so much to talk about yeah like I was just talking to my friend and it I mean me and her are regularly voice noting each other oh my god I just ate this oh my god you know am I going to lose free stone by the time we go to that wedding yeah you know in a jokey way we do it in a jokey way but we're not joking because deep down we're not like it's there but we'll just send like the emoji of a pig and then we both know that one of us has been a you know that's just like because it makes you feel better if someone else is doing it as well yeah me and else are like what you've just we're obsessed with food yeah and i love to cook you know so yeah i love all of it i love watching cooking programs

yeah all we do is talk about what we're making for dinner what we had for dinner yeah quite a common common theme next meal yeah yeah and as much as i moan about like you know oh it's always me that's got to think about what's for dinner. Actually, I want to do that. Yeah. Do you know what? My Mark recently over the last year or so, he now cooks and I really enjoy it. I didn't think I would because I'm a bit of a control freak. But actually, I really enjoy it.

Same. Exactly the same. So my husband will go, you just won't let me. Yeah. If it's spaghetti bolognese or chicken fajitas, then he'll do it. But other than that, it's me. What are you having tonight? Well, tonight we had a roast chicken yesterday. So we've got leftover chicken.

So I'll probably concoct some sort of pasta dish with that. Lovely. I love using up a bit of leftovers. Do you ever boil the carcass, Bex? Then I'll boil the carcass and have some stock in the freezer and stuff. Yeah, lovely. Very good. I did that boiled, obviously, big chicken carcass or whatever.

Yeah, done the bones. This was a few years ago. Did all the bones, put in all my bay leaves, loads of herbs, saffron, fortune, put all that in. Left it boiling, boiling, boiling, boiling, about two days. And then I emptied it out into the sink with a sieve and didn't put a bowl under it all went down the sink oh no oh no what a silly were you absolutely devastated i was devastated absolutely devastated and everyone was laughing at me were you there at the time yeah we was we were all here yeah i think it was my house it was pandemonium actually so i blame my family yeah if i would have been on my own i would have remembered the

saucepan underneath but no i didn't yeah but yeah what i'm going to do because my weight over the years has fluctuated dramatically yeah i was called a beached whale by gary bushell in the paper when i was about 13 so i remember i feel I'm very yeah feel very strongly about it and of course that has affected me and my mental health in terms of weight yeah and we put so much pressure on ourselves don't we oh so much you know and especially women at this stage of life where we're going through all sorts of perimenopausal shit yeah that that also has an effect on all of that so much you know everything is all you know and if you don't have you know I'm lucky I have a good group of girlfriends that we can talk about you know and I can ring them up and go oh this and and all that but if you don't have

that yeah it can your mental health you know it's it's awful isn? Yeah, I completely agree with you. So what I'd change is I'd like to be happy to be a healthy size 14 slash 16, depending on what shop I shop in. Yeah. And I just like to, I would like to just be happy with that. Yeah. So I think it's about three meals a day. Yeah. Proper, proper meals. Eating well, whatever, you know, eating, obviously eating something that's good for you.

Of course, yeah. And I think everything in moderation. I think it's at 80-20. You've got to have a treat. I haven't got a sweet tooth. I'm very, very lucky. I can have cakes and chocolate, biscuits, not in, don't touch them. For me, it's the crisps.

Yeah. I love crisps. And the wine. Oh, and the wine, obviously. Oh, and the crisps yeah I love crisps and the wine oh and the wine obviously but you know even that now I would drink every day without fail yeah

habitually drink not loads few glasses of wine no but just one couple of gin and tonics whatever and actually since Christmas

I've been yeah I've not even do you know what's really good is it's not a thing I just think oh I'm not going to drink tonight yeah I just and I don't and I what's really good is it's not a thing. I just think, oh, I'm not going to drink tonight.

Yeah. And I don't, and I don't really think about it, which is really good. Well, you're going to have a glass of wine tonight because you'll see him rage. I'm driving. Oh. See, I've even chosen to drive tonight because... Well, I was saying that, I haven't put the parking... You need to.

I don't think you can book it now. She didn't even know about it. I don't know, unless I get the train. Oh, here she goes. She's getting a train. She's going to have a bottle of red in gaucho. A bottle of wine for the train. Yeah, and for the train.

Yeah, yeah, we know the score. Oh, but Bex, thank you. Thank you so much for talking to me. Yeah, no, thank you. Thanks, darling. Take care. Bye. All right, bye.

Bye. for talking to me yeah no thank you thanks darling take care bye alright bye bye gotta go make a chilling gotta go to the shops and everything have you oh it's grim and it's after school you're gonna get all those people

with all those kids they go shopping with their kids why go before you've got the kids I know I agree or take the kids home and go later

it's a lot innit who wants to take their kids to a supermarket Go before you've got the kids. I know, I agree. Or take the kids home and go later. It's a lot, isn't it? Who wants to take their kids to a supermarket? Very, very rarely do I take my kids to a supermarket. A hideous, but like little kids. Different with your two because they're older. I still don't really see them. And it's still hideous. But when there's like two of them, one's like four and it's screaming it wants the chocolate lollipop.

Fucking too much. It is too much. It's a lot. Also, I don't like giving kids food when you've not paid for it. I mean, I often have a drink, get a little drink on the way around and drink it. Are you opening a bottle of wine? No, no. Cracking out straight to the beer's aisle. 9am on a Saturday morning.

One for the kids, one for me, off we go. I'll get one of those little cold coffees and I'll drink that on my way around 9am on a Saturday morning. One for the kids, one for me, off we go. I'll get one of those little cold coffees and I'll drink that on my way round and then I'll pay for it at the end. I don't know if I do that. I think if I'm gasping I've got a bottle of water before. I've not cracked a coffee open. Oh, why not?

But it's in your trolley. Scan and shop. I've technically already paid for it. Fair enough, scan and shop, yeah. I mean, I've done it when it's not scan and shop as well, but I don't think there's an issue with that. I'm going to pay for it. Fair enough, Scan and Shop, yeah. I mean, I've done it when it's not Scan and Shop as well, but I don't think there's an issue with that. I'm going to pay for it.

I'm not going to go and put it on the shelf. No. No. People do, though. Do you know that? Yeah. What, go round?

Yeah, you see like empty packets of stuff. Definitely seen people eating the grapes as well. And they buy weight a lot of these things. Wow, no. And they're not even

picking up the rest of the bag. You see that. You do see that. Interesting. There's a lot that goes things. Wow, no. And they're not even picking up the rest of the bag. You see that. You do see that. Interesting. There's a lot that goes on. I mean, now there's glass barriers in Sainsbury's. Oh, you have to scan. Yeah.

So you've scanned them and seen. There was one scan and shop queue. Yeah. And then two massive self-checkouts. There's only about four tills left. What are they going to do come Christmas? Because at least Marksies have those long ones. Yeah, they have got some long ones, yeah.

But there's genuinely only about four normal tills. So what are they going to do? I don't know. I mean, they're all there waiting for you on Christmas Eve at five in the morning. Well, they do wait for me. It's just a bit of a running joke about Christmas Eve. Natalie turned about Christmas Eve. And then Natalie turned up at half past eight at Christmas Eve because she was too hungover. I've really enjoyed my first one.

Me too. Yay! Oh, no, it's been brilliant. And thank you to all my guests. I've had little guests on today. Yeah. The little knack-crackers, chattelies or cassettes. I do like knack-crackers, youatterleys, or Cassettes. I do like Nutcrackers,

you know. Yeah, a bit Christmassy for me. Alright, I'll do the poem, we'll see. Well anyway, thank you so,

so much for listening this week. I hope you've enjoyed the first one. Feels a bit weird now. Feels all very real. If you liked it, please subscribe,

like it for us, leave me some comments. It would be lovely to hear what you think. And this week, I'll pop some more bits on Instagram for you to you know

have your comments on and see what we're going to chat about and who I'm going to talk to next week thanks for listening Hi this is Chris McCausland and this is Diane Boswell

and we've got a new podcast haven't we Di? We do What's it called? Winning. Isn't. Everything. Every week, me and Diane, we're going to be having a little catch up on the back of Strictly, aren't we, Di?

We are. I've missed you, Chris. I've missed you, too. We're going to talk some nonsense, so why not tune in? Available everywhere you get your podcasts.